#tired and clingy?

[yellow-g0ache]

Anyone else craving something between intimate touch and autistic sensory euphoria, I don't mean feather light traces on bare skin that shit makes my skin crawl. Can u like crush the weight of my soul back into my body, or idk wrap ur legs around mine, a squeezing bear hug maybe. Let me be a weighted blanket for a while

[the-fandom-abyss]

i feel the same big feelings when i’m little in the same way i would as if i were big and i think i’ve realised- recently this year some of the people who i would be safe to regress around have distanced themselves from me - essentially hurting me (they were kinda important to my regression) and no matter how many times i’ve told them etc nothing changes and yet i get to see them being happy (which i enjoy seeing my friends happy even if they’ve hurt me. i care more about others then myself lol). anyway anytime i see anything regression related it just makes me feel so ‘ugh’ and idk it’s almost like disgusted. but i’m only feeling the disgust towards myself and my own regression. i don’t feel that way in general about regression if that makes sense

it’s like maybe this chapter of my life is over? or maybe i’m so deep in pain and just mentally so not good that i’m trying to throw away all my healthy coping mechanisms and just reach for the safety of my old unhealthy ones bc it’s like this type of comfort for me.

idk if my last ask went through bc tumblr glitched out on me last time. but i really appreciate you listening to me and letting me be here and vent. i’m just so tired. i’m close to just deleting everything and isolating bc everything is too much all of the time. it’s a lot of pain and i’m not strong enough to deal with it

Don’t you just wish your little self could help you with some epiphanies? Like use that little genius brain to help the silly big brain to sort out its problems.

I’m so sorry to hear that some of the people you would call close have been pulling away from you. Have they explained why they have been distancing themselves? I think it’s a little unfair for them to leave without an explanation, because of its due to something, you could have talked it through and worked on making it better.

It’s like your mind is trying to push that part of you away, so the best way is to dislike it. I can see where you’re coming from, wanting to continue the unhealthy mechanisms instead of the healthy. And your negative thoughts are clouding and morphing what you used to see as healthy.

If you delete, how would I get to talk to the amazing anon? I’m not going to lie, I was waiting for your reply. I kept checking my notifications for your response and then was so excited when I saw it this morning!!

I think you are more than strong enough to deal with it all, you’ve made it this far! I know that one person saying this doesn’t really shift the emotions but at least you know you have someone in your corner, ready to fight for you and fight with you.

[ponpox]

Just Curly supporting his whiny, weirdly aggressive, kinda stinky best friend

[choccorin]

thinking about how soft rin would get when he's sleepy and tired ... like imagine him being all grumpy after practice, but after he showers and gets into the comfy pajamas with owls printed on them (you bought it for him, it's a matching set). the cold shower took all his stress away, now he just wants to spend the rest of the night in your arms.

he doesn't say it but he loves being the one getting pampered .. he loves laying on top of you while you play with his hair, sometimes he'd ask you to tell him about your day or sing him a song that he loves. and before he drifts off to sleep, he'd give you a soft kiss as a thank you for taking care of him.

[mrmeepsmadmind]

i love when ppl draw bumblebee like the happy little creachure he is but also i love when people draw bumblebee like he's had 500 beers in the last 1 hour and still the pain won't even ebb

[airenyah]

The Heart Killers – Q24 – 03 Oct 2024

[mellohiizz]

…if we’re requesting ship art rn could i suggest manebu 👉👈 /nf (not-forcing)

another one i haven't heard of before, but here. ^_^

[gomzdrawfr]

grocery shopping (long doodle ahead)

extra:

[bricky-brikson]

Thinking about the "trilion and 12 years old" joke about Bill and thinking about his psychological development after the Euclydia massacre

In the show, we see that while he can plan ahead and manipulate people, he's often foiled by his own impulsiveness/anger/emotions. His ultimate goal is to escape the Nightmare Realm/Dimension 0. And sure, he says this is because he promised the Henchmaniacs he'd help them, but ultimately as others have pointed out, Bill is terrified of death. He wants to live forever - have "a party that never ends with a host who never dies". All he cares about is himself, his own survival and hedonism

All this to say, Bill has the emotional development of a teen. He hasn't gotten past the self-centredness nor the reward/adrenaline seeking behaviour, but has emotionally evolved enough to be able to manipulate people and such (and be able to feel guilt, even if it's just a picogram). Though his immaturity shows when he doesn't get his way.

One might think that, being a trillion years old, he would've developed a bit, but here's the thing - major traumas can "freeze" people at certain developmental stages. We don't know how old Bill was when Euclydia was destroyed - though considering his behaviour I would bet he was a teen.

(Or whatever the equivalent of that stage is for his species. They have exoskeletons- do they have instars then? Whatever, that's not on the topic of this post)

Seeing his entire dimension destroyed after (what was probably) a well-intentioned attempt to show them what he saw ("They'll see. They'll all see.") permanently emotionally stunted him. However it was he got his powers, he was a teen/young adult with powerful abilities who had just erased an entire dimension from existence and was now accountable to no one but himself while also being deeply traumatized. His constant partying and implied substance use were probably the only coping mechanisms he could think of, dissociating because he has no idea how to actually confront what happened. The way he talks about the massacre - he detaches himself from it yet still admits guilt ("A monster."). Only post-divorce does he implicate himself in the event, though still obscuring its true nature ("I liberated them.").

Being surrounded by individuals who are similarly maladjusted for most of his trillion-year lifespan certainly didn't help things. The Henchmaniacs are likely somewhat stunted as well, or at the very least don't offer much in the way of mature/emotionally adult conversation, especially since Bill reacts so poorly (read: homocidally) to any sense of malcontent.

Which is to say, I think part of why Ford was important to Bill was because, compared to him, Ford was more emotionally developed (Ford is emotionally stunted in his own ways, but not as severely as Bill IMO). Subconsciously, their relationship was reaching a hand out to the scared teenager in the centre of Bill's psyche and offering him someone to lean on- someone who had their shit a little bit more figured out. A kind of figure Bill hadn't had since he killed his parents.

Of course, such vulnerability probably felt so alien that Bill tried to distance himself. I always wondered - why didn't Bill just lie to Ford about his plan to take over Dimension 49'\ ? Ford would've believed him, finished the portal, and Bill's plan would've been fulfilled. Well, I think it was Bill trying to burn the emotional bridge. In his own impulsivity, his own desire to dissociate instead of confront, he would rather make sure that he would never be able to be vulnerable to Ford than fulfill his grand plan.

...

I don't remember where I was going with this. There's no conclusion. I'm spinning this triangular multidimensional tyrant at physically impossible speeds in my mind and if I didn't write something about him my skull was going to turn into a fine powder. It's almost 2 AM, so it's entirely possible this post makes 0 sense, in which case feel free to inform me of that in the notes.

[napping-sapphic]

i’m so tired….i want someone to lay next to me so i can cling onto them like a koala

[clairedaring]

What are you talking about? On the Christmas night, you hugged me from behind and called me Tong. What? So you're heartbroken, huh? Since he just got engaged to her.

MY STAND-IN (2024) | 1.04

[feng-shui71]

ok but let's be real, why does Wesker look adorable when he kisses Jordan in any way,,,

like, the way you draw him kissing her, your dbd post with the neck kiss?? he's so gentle what,,,

where's this monster I hear about, hm? I only see deprived husband showing affection for wife he doesn't see due to suspiciously tentacle like creature barrier (the entity)

WHHFYQHFJFJHAJAJAJ oh my god this is so sweet .. no literally.. this compelled me to fill out a kiss chart i found on pinterest

[love-suggestions]

after a long day, there is nothing i want more than my head resting gently on your chest, your hands stroking softly though my hair, and the steady sound of your heartbeat underneath me, a comforting reminder of your presence and your love for me

[nothingbizzare]

Really clingy fugio :)

[jay72664]

There and back again

TW: Mentions of thoughts of self harm (Nothing in detail), implied thoughts of suicide, suggestive, but nothing for the viewers.

Tick, Tick, Tick.

Dazai was going to break that clock.

Tick, Tick, Tick.

It was as if it were taunting him.

Tick, Tick, Tick.

He just wanted Chuuya to be back already.

Tick, Tick, Tick.

So he could hold him.

Tick, Tick, Tick.

And kiss him, and-

Tick, Tick, Tick.

Seriously? When did their clock get so loud.

Tick, Tick, Tick.

Sick of the noise, Dazai decided to go wait on the front porch, making sure to grab his coat and his scarf otherwise Chuuya would scold him when he got home.

God, he couldn’t wait for him to be home.

He’d been gone for to weeks.

It should be illegal for him to leave him for so long.

He had hardly eaten-nothing tasted good when compared to Chuuya’s food.

Had barely slept either-how could he when he didn’t have a Chibi-sized heater sleeping next to him?

And he nearly relapsed.

Nearly.

Chuuya had called him before he did anything.

And Chuuya would be mad, and sad, and guilty if he cut himself.

Or worse.

Not feeling like he could sit any longer he got up and simply paced around the driveway, hands in his pockets.

It was rather cold.

He smirked.

He was definitely going to shove his cold hands underneath Chuuya’s shirt.

And then he saw the lights of Chuuya’s car, and he felt a smile tug on his face as he pulled into the driveway.

The moment it parked he was by the door.

He opened it before Chuuya had even managed to unbuckle, and had immediately tackled him.

“You’re heavy.” Chuuya huffed, arms coming to hug the lanky man back.

“Missed you.” He mumbles instead of replying, burying his face in the shorter man’s hair.

His missed his smell so much, his pillows, soaps, and clothes could only do so much.

“I know.” He says softly. “Can’t I at least go inside? It’s freezing out here.”

Begrudgingly, Dazai got off of him, and helped him get his things out of the trunk, simply setting them on the floor in the living room.

Then he sat in the couch and stared expectantly at Chuuya with his arms open.

Chuuya shook his head and laugh softly, but climbs into his husband’s lap regardless.

He buried his head in Chuuya’s hair again, wrapping his arms around him.

“You’re not allowed to leave for that long again.” He grumbles.

“Is that so? I’m not sure I can promise that, but I can promise I won’t for at least six months.” Chuuya remarks, clearly amused by his husband’s clinginess.

“Meanie.” He grumbles, tightening his hold.

Chuuya laugh, the sound better than Dazai remembered. “How is that mean? I can’t control when I leave.”

“You should just retire.”

“From the mafia?” He lifts his face off to give Dazai an amused look.

“Yes, you’d be a wonderful housewife.” Dazai muses, only half teasing.

Chuuya shakes his head. “I’ll quit the mafia, when you quit being clingy.”

Dazai sighs melodramatically, his arms coming to rest on the shorter man’s waist. “How can I when you’re so sexy?”

Chuuya instantly blushes. “Shut up, you’re just trying to seduce me.”

Dazai smirks. “So what if I am? You’ve been gone for two weeks, I don’t think I’ve ever gone that long without sex in my life.”

Chuuya gives him a deadpan look. “TMI.”

Dazai rolls his eyes. “Come one, I’ll be quick.”

“I’m sure.” Chuuya rolls his eyes, causing Dazai to pouts.

“You won’t have to do anything, you can just lay there, being sexy.” He whines.

Chuuya sighs, but caves. “Alright, fine, as long as you’re gentle, I’m tired.”

“Promise.”

Dazai locks his lips against Chuuya’s in a soft kiss, after all; he had all night.

[skyward-floored]

wait, did Hyrule ever find out what happened to Malon? 👀 (Downfall IAU)

- hero-of-the-wolf

Yep :)

In fact I was writing something for it, and this ask kicked me into gear in actually finishing it lol. It was originally much longer and had a lot more things happening in it, but I decided I just wanted to get to the juicy bit. I’ll show more of what Sky and Sun are doing some other time.

(Comes after this)

————————————————————

Sun got everyone wrapped in a dry fluffy towel within short order, and Wind helped Four dry off, watching his little brother carefully. He knew things were weighing on him—they were on Wind too—and he looked so small and pale at the moment, damp and dirty. Wind was never one to doubt Four’s strength, but he looked pretty shaken right now.

Sometimes he forgot his brother was as young as he was.

Wind squeezed his shoulder as Sun told them there was food in the kitchen if they wanted any, and Four leaned into it, looking a little less downtrodden. Sun then left to find Hyrule and contact Sky, slipping out the back door. Legend helped Ravio sit, then flopped on the couch, taking his mask off and rubbing his eyes. His hair was fluffed up where it had been dried with the towel, and Wind thought it made him look younger.

Wind and Four both squished onto an armchair together, and they all waited in silence for Sun to come back. Four dozed against Wind’s shoulder, and Wind nearly fell asleep himself, the opportunity to actually rest making him feel even tireder.

But he didn’t want to sleep yet. He wanted to make sure Sky was okay.

And Twilight...

A clock on the wall chimed the hour, and Wind blinked as it finished, hearing footsteps. He must’ve dozed off for a little bit. The sound of a door opening somewhere rang out, and Wind tensed as he heard what sounded like an umbrella being shook out.

“Hello? You guys awake in here?” a familiar voice called softly, and Four startled beside him, lifting his head.

“Hyrule!” he said with an excited grin, and the brunette came quickly around the corner, face lighting up as he saw all of them.

“Four! Legend, Wind!” he said excitedly, hustling over to them. “You’re okay! I heard the messages Mrs. Malon left, nobody knew what had happened, and I begged Sky to take me so I could help. He had a lot of annoyingly good points as for why I should stay in the base though, so I did. But Sun said you’re here! And you are! You’re all okay!”

It was more excitement then Wind had ever heard from this Hyrule before, and it made the news they had to deliver sour even more on his tongue. Hyrule quickly caught on to their overall mood though, and his smile dimmed.

“Are you guys okay?” he asked more quietly, and Legend looked away from him.

“None of us got badly hurt,“ Legend said stiffly. “Ravio here needs some attention though, if you wouldn’t mind.”

Hyrule looked like he desperately wanted to ask more, but he nodded and went to Ravio’s side, Ravio giving him a cautious look.

“What uh... what are you doing?” he asked as Hyrule pulled off the soggy bandages on his leg.

“Healing your leg,” Hyrule said in a practiced tone, one that Wind didn’t like. It sounded weirdly detached, and Hyrule’s face slipped into a smooth look as he lit his hands up and leaned forward. “Hold still please.”

Ravio looked equally awed and suspicious, but didn’t move as Hyrule gently set a hand against the wound. He closed his eyes for a moment, bluish light shimmering across his face and Ravio’s leg, and then he pulled back with a small smile.

“There you go,” he said, and Ravio stared, cautiously moving his leg, then wiggling it harder. Then he stood up and put weight on it, and let out a shocked laugh.

“That’s crazy! You fixed it!” he laughed, and hopped up and down. “Man, it doesn’t hurt at all! Thanks!”

Hyrule blushed and nodded, and Ravio walked excitedly around the house on his healed leg, before heading into the kitchen. Wind’s stomach growled as he heard the sound of some sort of packaging being rustled, but he ignored it. He could eat later.

They needed to tell Hyrule what had happened.

Hyrule’s smile turned uncertain once Ravio was gone, and he scratched at his shoulder, looking at them all with a hard-to-read expression on his face.

“What happened?” he asked finally. “Is... is Mrs. Malon okay?”

Four went still, swallowing thickly, and Legend looked away. Wind breathed out, and ignored the returning sting in his eyes as he looked up at Hyrule.

“The house got raided. They tried to catch all of us, and... Malon didn’t make it. She got caught helping us escape,” Wind whispered.

Hyrule froze, and his face paled. His expression slipped into one of devastation, and he sank down against the wall, his face paling as he clutched at his arms.

“They... this is all my fault,” he whispered, and Legend immediately shook his head.

“No, nu-uh, you don’t get to blame yourself for this,” he interrupted, and Hyrule looked at him with tears in his eyes.

“If I hadn’t stayed at your place then they wouldn’t have looked for me there. But I did and they did, I made you all bigger targets, and now they’ve got Mrs. Malon and they’re going to do something awful to her like branding or worse and she’ll—”

“Stop,” Legend said firmly, getting up and setting a hand on his head. “Not your fault.”

Hyrule’s lip trembled, but he didn’t argue further, looking away and quickly wiping his sleeve over his eyes. Legend swallowed, and Wind saw him blink a couple times as he looked at his feet.

“I mean it Link,” he said more quietly. His voice sounded a little thick. “It’s not your fault. I don’t blame you.”

But who do you blame? Wind thought, watching as Legend pulled his hand back, and clenched it into a fist.

“We’ll get her back,” Wind spoke up, and Hyrule looked at him with red eyes. “If we could get you out, then we can save her too. I’m sure Sky and Sun can help us, they have resources and stuff. We’ll get her back.”

“They’ll be expecting you to try,” Hyrule whispered.

Silence fell over them again, and Four leaned on Wind’s arm without saying anything. The only sound for a moment was the soft ticking of the clock on the wall, and it was only broken by Wind’s stomach growling again.

Legend sighed.

“Food. Then bed,” he said quietly, glancing at Wind and Four. “We’ll talk about this more tomorrow.”

He went into the kitchen without another word, and Wind stood up, Four doing the same. Hyrule caught his arm as he walked up, and gave Wind a heartbroken look.

“I’m... I’m glad you guys are okay. It’s really good to see you again,” he said, and Wind gave him a quick hug, Hyrule tensing, then relaxing into it.

“Us too,” Four whispered as he joined them, and Wind nodded.

Hyrule let out a small sniffle into his shoulder, and Wind squeezed him and Four tighter, holding back a weary sigh.

Can we really get her back?

Wind decided not to think about it right now.

He pulled back from the hug, giving Hyrule a weak smile, and Hyrule returned it, his eyes still glassy. Four squeezed Hyrule one more time, and then they all went into the kitchen to find something to eat, nobody saying anything further on the subject.