#time for a big cup of coffee

[fereldanwench]

i finally slept for more than 5 hours this week and I'm even more tired than usual 😭😭😭

[alaraxia]

inspired by a question in the patreon discord on what your sidestep is getting at the gas station convenience store at 3AM

[sun-marie]

i'm working on a comm and just realized lucanis got a new cup pre-release vs. post-release. neat!

[pergaminaa]

Something something Modern AU:

Dorian is hanging out with Sorrel, Asterin and Vesta and Asterin recalls the time she Manon and Vesta bought a giant bag of ground coffee and they kept brewing coffee every 1-2 hours to get them though a long day.

Sorrel was there but she didn’t participate in the madness. She said how “they kept drinking that coffee as if it was damned water” and “they were all jittery as fuck” because Asterin and Vesta are a bad influence on Manon because she didn’t stop them and partook in that insanity.

[greppelheks]

Rainy days on the farm

[scrawlingskribbles]

not me blearily waking up at 5:30am almost in tears bc I had a dream that Ian had apparently been making more little OK KO shorts on the side and the utter joy I was feeling as dream!me was scrambling to find & watch them only to wake up before I could........ :((((

[inaris-mage-of-storms]

There are a few posts floating around with lots of love and encouragement for artists and writers, but can we take a moment to say thank you to all the beta readers and editors out there? Y'all are incredible. Your services are invaluable and I love you so very much. 💙

[tarantula-hawk-wasp]

Spent two hours consciously putting myself into a better headspace so I could respond to my coworker’s email without rigging the email to develop teeth and bite him

[poniz-lettering]

Cozy morning

[mariocki]

The China Syndrome (1979)

"I may be wrong, but I'd say you're lucky to be alive. For that matter, I think we might say the same for the rest of Southern California."

[elprupneerg]

Had a successful trip to the spice store today :)

[loving-ricciardo]

half of my desk is just cups because each one is for a different drink…

[shencomix]

How to Be The Dominant Male in Any Situation

Let's say you walk into a party.

You are wet and pathetic. Not only are you a worm, but even among worms you are the runt of the litter.

There's a way to fix that. Even you can be the alpha male in every situation you're in. Here's how:

Alpha Male Rule 1: Stand Tall or Very Short

In some things in nature, like rats and giraffes, the biggest creature in is leader.

However, in other things in nature, like the mafia, which has large goons but a small boss, the smallest creature is the leader.

You need to lean into whichever option is closest to you. If you are almost short, try wearing a big suit like a mob boss would wear to also make yourself wider like a mob boss. If are you almost tall, like I am, trying wearing these bad boys:

Now, I know what you're thinking: "High heels?? But isn't that for women???" Women have been hiding them from us men because they are afraid of how powerful we would be with them. But, why do women alone get to augment so much about themselves?? Look at all the eyeliner and mascara they need to even begin to mimic the power and seductiveness of our male eyelashes:

So, let's take a look at how we're doing now having applied just this one piece of advice:

It's a whole new situation. Let's move onto rule 2:

Alpha Male Rule 2: Always Get What You Want But Never Ask For It

I notice the man next to me has cookies. I would like one. Not only that, but there's also a woman next to me, watching. Asking another man for a cookie is extremely un-alpha behavior, so here's how you go about this situation:

1) Point out that someone else has something that you want

2) Cry until they give it to you

If everything has gone according the plan, you now have a cookie, and the woman is thinking something like this:

Let's move onto the last rule.

Alpha Male Rule 3: Always Up the Ante

Whatever you want to do or say, do or say it at least 3 times as hard as a regular person. When your coffee is $3, you should give $9 to show how wealthy you are. When you say "I'll be back in 5 minutes" you should actually be back in 15 minutes -- but really, you should say "I'll be back in 15 minutes" and be back in 45 minutes.

You should also start every task at step 3 rather than step 1. So, a normal (read: beta) guy might tell a girl "I think you're pretty" and then later ask "will you be my girlfriend?' But you should just say this:

99% of women will say yes, but if she needs further convincing, it can be helpful to offer her a small present, like a trinket or snack.

Congratulations. You have now learned how to be the most dominant male in any situation. Here are a few more tips for the road:

Claim to be descended from an ancient king or emperor. You can make a map or your lineage and fold it up to carry it in your pocket, so that you may unfold it whenever it needs to be presented.

If a woman takes a genuine interest in you, do the full body blush animation rising from bottom to top like you're a cup filling up, then run away, leaving behind a small cloud and a few speed lines. The idea that woman can actually like you is a lie perpetuated by Big Women.

If you want to further increase your height, try wearing bunny ears.

[amazingkitty]

Sometimes I wanna be like im not That caffeine sensitive im exaggerating and then i look up caffeine amounts in stuff and find out it's not even that high but drinking those beverages makes me feel like my heart's about to burst out of my chest

[senseiwu]

Had a burning feeling in the back of my mouth and kinda felt like throwing up earlier, I think that's reflux if I'm understanding it correctly...

Having tea with milk in it probably isn't a good idea but it is very nice to sip tea while I download the scans of the mail and send them off...

[shark--apologist]

is being known for smelling like coffee in high school a good or bad thing