#though I’m real about the adhd headcanons don’t @ me

[arcsin27]

Gaining lots of appreciation for the adhd guy and autism guy dynamic

[ddollfface]

Just a Little Bit of Affection

Cuddling Headcanons for Baki Men

Warning; I would say that there's none here! Overall, it's just fluffy! Although reader is fem, or was written with a girl in mind, so keep that in mind, sorry :/

Kiyosumi Katou

Don’t let this man fool you because he will act all macho and snarky when you’re around other people, but the moment you guys are alone, it’s like a whole new man appeared. I like to think that he’s a little touch starved, liking to have the touch of his lover when he sleeps. Being a fighter doesn’t leave much room for weakness, or soft things like cuddling, he takes this to the extreme and will act like a little brat whenever in public. 

He puts up this facade of this big strong man, which he is, who doesn’t need someone by his side, all he needs is his two fists and a strong opponent. Once you’ve gotten through those thick walls, the trust issues, and the strong ego, you’re met with a man who’s really sweet. I think that he really is a good person, but he’s just misunderstood; aren’t we all? 

Now, that we’re past that, what is he like when he’s comfortable with you? Well, well, I’m glad you asked because this boy’s got a tight grip. Even though you’re in a special place in his heart, he still has a certain, borderline toxic, view of masculinity, and he’s avidly against being the little spoon. He’s the man! He should be the one holding onto you! And that he will. He’ll wrap his strong arms around your figure, likely pressing your face into his chest or keeping you from looking at his face, can’t have you seeing his flushed cheeks, can we? Overall, he’s not much of a cuddler, preferring to move around, but he’ll dabble in a cuddle or two when he’s got a beer and some game playing in the background. Katou will drap his arm over the back of the couch, letting you rest your head on his chest, while his other hand cradles a beer bottle. It’s comfortable, and it’s silent. It’s like his self-care kinda, chilling with his hot girlfriend while watching his favorite sport/game/show/etc.

Hanma Jack

Another man who doesn’t cuddle too much, especially at the beginning of your relationship. He’s not a big fan of just sitting around, instead, he wants to be working, improving, just something, anything really (that sounds like ADHD if you ask me lol). He’s not necessarily opposed to it or anything, it’s just he gets restless, but nonetheless, I think he’d like to please you. If you really want him to cuddle, then he’ll oblige for you. He’ll huff and puff, grumbling under his breath as he lies on his back, the only way he can really cuddle. You’ll be lying on his chest, running your fingers across his pec mindlessly as you just soak in his presence. 

Although I don’t think that Jack talks much, especially around other people, he does enjoy ranting to you. You’re his special someone, his lover, and likely the first and only person he’ll ever have a real relationship with. Don’t get me wrong, he’s fine with that, but that just makes you all the more special to him. He sees you like his other half in a sense, and that’s why he’s far more comfortable just speaking freely to you. And that is why he’ll rant to you about some recent fight he had, or how this one bugger wouldn’t stop staring at him, or even any future plans he has to get strong, better, to defeat his father. 

He trusts you with his heart, so it’s easy to spill this information as he cards his fingers through your hair, calming himself as your hearts follow a matching beat. It feels a little euphoric to Jack, and that’s why he thinks that sometimes, just sometimes, he can get behind an occasional cuddle. He’ll admit… They’re beginning to grow on him.

Hanma Baki

Oh boy, this guy is a cuddler for sure. I follow the narrative that Baki has mommy issues. I mean, how can he not?? Just look at him, mommy issues are just oozing out of him! Anyway, I’m continuing this narrative. 

He for sure wants to lay on top of you, his ear pressed to your chest, just wanting to listen to every thump of your heart. In an odd way, it’s calming, and it eases his own mind. He really can’t help it! Baki finds comfort in your warm presence, in the way your fingers brush through his messy hair, or how you softly scratch the back of his neck with your nails. Everything about it is like Heaven to him, and so, whenever he’s back from a fight, he’ll just flop on top of you.

Don’t be fooled by his baby face and cheeky grin, he’s a troublemaker, and will in fact not get off of you until he is pleased. Being clingy, he doesn’t want to part with you once he gets comfortable, and this cuddling session will only end on his terms. What do you mean you have homework to do? Ew, why would you want to do homework rather than cuddle with your cute boyfriend? Do you not love him or something? How can you be sooooo cruel!

Yeah… He can be a little dramatic, but that’s the appeal, I suppose. Although he prefers to be the little spoon, that doesn’t mean that he can’t enjoy being the big spoon. If he so happens to feel like holding you, or if you’re in need of some comfort, he’ll wrap his arms around your waist, pulling you into his lap. With your legs wrapped around his waist, he’ll coo at you, teasingly pressing kisses to your temple as he questions what’s got you so upset… Tell him a name, and he’ll handle it! Don’t worry, babe, you’ve got the best boyfriend in the world! And he’ll handle everything, just give him the word. 

Hanayama Kaoru

Likes having you sit on his lap while he does paperwork. Being an oyabun for the yakuza means lots and lots of paperwork, Karou doesn’t mind it, but you sure do; is it crazy that you want to spend time with your lover? No, it’s not, so the only real solution is to spend time while he’s doing paperwork. 

You’ll lay your head on his shoulder, arms wrapped around his neck, while one of his large hands rubs soothing circles on your lower back. It’s peaceful. The only sound is the scrapping of his pencil and the sounds of your breathing. I think that quality time would be one of Kaoru's love languages, but being that he doesn’t have much time, cuddling like this is a good alternative. It makes him feel normal, not something he strives for, but nice nonetheless. 

Kaoru, like Jack, isn’t much of a talker, not even to you. He’s never been a man of many words, preferring to use his actions to show his thoughts, whether it be his fists or presents left on your bed. Either way, you’ll get the message. The way he’s gentle with you, holding you with the uttermost care he can, acting as if you’re porcelain. In a way, you kinda are, especially in his hands, hands meant for violence and bloodshed. 

Although he’d like to spoon you to sleep, this man sleeps like a brick and prefers to sleep on his back. I also don’t think you’d want him to spoon you… The moment he falls asleep, you’re never getting him off you until he’s awake again. This man is heavy, so if you have to go to the restroom or just get up to go to work, then you’re going to have to just wait until he’s awake lol. That doesn’t mean he minds you cuddling up to him. He’ll let you hug his side, lay on top of him, or attempt to spoon him. He doesn’t care too much as it doesn’t disrupt his sleep, so do as you wish. 

Matsumoto Kozue

Oh my Lord, she’s such a sweetheart! I love Kozue, even though she can be a little dense sometimes. I think she’d be a little shy to ask for cuddles and such, but embarrassment wouldn’t stop her from asking. I also think that she’d prefer to be the little spoon, wanting to be pressed against your chest as you two talk about your day. 

She’d go on and on about her classmates, what they said, any drama, or the cute bakery she saw on the way home from school… Maybe you guys should go there sometime? Kozue would like to face you when cuddling, liking the eye contact that comes with it. Her hand cupped your face as you lean your cheek against her palm, smiling at each other like two teenagers in love. Mindlessly, she’d braid your hair or brush it, all depending on your hair type ofc. I think she’d DIE if you were to start messing with her hair, loving how it feels like a massage as your nails rub her scalp. It’s a nice way to relax after school.

Although she loves to get dolled up and go out on the town, roaming from bakery to bakery and the park, she also doesn’t mind just cozying up at home. I think Kozue would enjoy a small movie marathon, watching different reality shows and romcoms! Your shoulders pressed against each other as you lean against one another, maybe her face in the crook of your neck, just enjoying each other’s warmth. It’s her favorite way to fall asleep, sometimes it feels like she’s in a dream...

Kaiou Retsu

Sigh, he’s such a virgin, and he acts like one. Good God, this guy cannot be romantic with you without feeling his face grow warm, and his cheeks catch on fire. He can be romantic, but that’s only after he’s practiced his script in the mirror around… a hundred times? Possibly more depending on the situation. He really can’t help it, you make Retsu’s heart swell, and his head go fuzzy like you’re Smokin’ Joe for God’s sake!

Nonetheless, Retsu is a natural caretaker. He enjoys making you feel at home, giving you a space where you can be yourself. It’s his love style, after all. While he’s not a natural cuddler himself, as he’s far too tense to be one, he’ll try his best if it means that you’re happy. Retsu’s goal in life is to be a partner you can be proud of, someone you would come to when in need. 

That’s how he got here: your head in his lap while you both watch some older action movie that involves martial arts. These are the only movies Retsu will ever watch because he likes to critique them… He finds it pleasant, to feel your chest rise and fall as you smush your cheek against his hardened thigh. Although a little embarrassing, he ignores the clench of his heart in favor of the texture of your hair.

This is a little side thing, but if you have some form of curly hair, that you need to detangle or have some long, strenuous routine, then Retsu is more than happy to do it for you! All you have to do is sit between his legs while he applies whatever butter oils, creams, leave-ins, etc., you use. He enjoys doing these things for you, and it’s even more rewarding when you praise him for the good job he did. If you have 4A, 4B, or 4C type hair, where you usually wear protective styles like braid, twists, etc., then he’ll also learn how to braid your hair, just to take the responsibility off of you. 

Although it’ll take him a while to get the hang of it, he’ll try for you. Retsu understands the pain hair can be (have you seen his luscious locks???). Though something that he’d surprisingly enjoy would be you brushing out his own hair, doing whatever type of braids you know for fun. He’d never ask directly, and he’d be farrr too embarrassed to do so, but he’d never refuse if you offered (hint, hint).

Orochi Katsumi

Oh boy, we have another cuddle bug here, and he has twice the confidence and half the self-awareness as Baki. In just day-to-day life, Katsumi is touchy, always wanting to have a hand on you and be by your side, no matter what. Although he’s pretty busy, he does try to make it up when he is around. But unlike Hanayama, you are likely, or may, work with him at the dojo, seeing as it’s not a dangerous line of work like Hanayama’s. 

Of course, this gives you guys wayyy more time to see each other, but even then it’s not enough for Katsumi. That means the moment you close the door and settle back into your shared home, he’s all over you, making up all the time he could’ve been lovin’ you up! He’ll run his hands down your sides, pressing his nose to your collar as you sway side-to-side. Katsumi doesn’t want to let you go, but he relents as he swings you over his shoulder, letting out a mischievous cackle when you squeal. 

There is where he’ll set you down on your shared bed with a bright grin, his eyes crinkling as you swat his shoulder, making a snide remark. Maybe you guys will watch a movie, or you might just gossip about one of Katsumi’s students, or even play some board/video games if you’re into that! Really, he just wants to spend quality time with you and have you snuggled into his side. 

Though I do think that Katsumi gets restless a lot, but he doesn’t want the loving to end, so he’ll just adjust your positioning. Sometimes you’ll be lying on his chest, resting your cheek against his peck as you rambled about your current interests or your friend’s drama with her own boyfriend, to which Katsumi gives the funniest remarks. 

This is a side thing, but if you’re anything like me, then you like to talk a lot. And I think that Katsumi would be a really good listener, in the sense that he’s not like Hanayama, who just nods his head or hums, instead, he’s giving you feedback, engaging with what you say. Things like “she said what?!” or “I would’ve punched him then and there!” Small things like that, that really add to the conversation and make it a lot funner (don’t come at me, I know it’s not a real word). And I think that during ya’ll’s quality time, a lot of this back and forth would be happening.

Overall, Katsumi is a real sweetheart who just wants to be around you, even if it’s just lying in silence. However, that silence doesn’t last long because he’s a natural yapper.

Biscuit Olivia

Big boys who like to lay on top of you >>>> Even though he's far bigger than you, Olivia still enjoys cuddling with his head pressed into your chest, and arms wrapped around your waist. And we’ve got another guy who’s very busy, but that doesn’t mean he doesn’t give you attention! 

For the sake of conversation, we’ll just say that Maria (my love) doesn’t exist, even though I’m interested in writing about that relationship dynamic. Whatever, for most of the day, Olivia is out hunting down criminals, roaming around the prison, or doing whatever Mr. Unchained does during the day, but when he returns to his special place, he doesn’t waste any time getting to you. There’s a set routine the two of you have gotten. 

Olivia, exactly at 18:30 PM, will knock on your shared, bedroom door, bouquet of your favorite flowers in hand and dressed in a suit. Of course, knowing your routine, you’ll be dressed in whatever you deem fancy, and greet Olivia by leaning on the door and a pleased smile. He’ll lean down, and you’ll kiss his cheek, standing on your tippy-toes, and he’ll put his arm out. Getting the hint, you’ll intertwine yours with his, taking the flowers in the other. Olivia will take you for dinner, sometimes it’s in the prison, and other times it’s somewhere else. You guys will chat for hours, usually ending at 22:00-ish. 

This is where the actual cuddling comes in lol, he’ll swoop you off your feet, carry you back to your shared room, and lie you on the bed, both of you still dressed up. His arms will wrap around you, pressing his face to your chest as he mumbles on about how much he loves you, being classic Olivia. Your hands will massage his shoulders, giggling when he lets out pleased grumbles. Sometimes, it leads to sex, other times you both just slip into slumber, and you follow that pattern more days than not.

Pickle

Cuddling is a foreign concept to Pickle, seeing as during his time, there was no one to cuddle. Back then, he was either hunting or lazing around, maybe causing meaningless trouble. There wasn’t much to do, so he had to entertain himself. But now that you are here, Pickle never gets bored! Thoughts of you fill his head constantly, he just finds you to be so entertaining!

You look so different than him, than the creatures of his time, well, your world looks so different. And Pickle is naturally curious, so he takes any chance he can to observe your body, trying to figure out how you’re so soft. You’re so small compared to him, and he finds it to be oddly funny.

He finds it horribly frustrating that he cannot say what he’s thinking, unable to verbalize it in a way that you’d understand, so he has to be creative with how he communicates. A lot of the time, it comes in the form of physical affection. I’ve touched on this topic before in this post (you should check it out, wink wink). He likes to be close to you because it means security for your safety. He still has the survival instincts that so many of us have lost, due to the advancements of society. Pickle is constantly on alert, so he likes to have you as close as physically possible.

Whatever the arrangement is, Pickle will curl around you, liking to have his nose pressed against your neck. Every once and a while, he’ll nip at your skin, an odd attempt to claim you. Though that’s only if he gets bored enough lol. Pickle will have you in a death hug of sorts, making it so you cannot get away from him and run off. Whatever it is, let’s just say that you’ll be stuck there for a while… At least, until Pickle gets bored.

Jun Guevaru

Baby, this man will serenade himself into your sheets, wooing your pants right off! Now, for Jun, I think that cuddles will lead to sex more times than not, but that doesn't mean all the time. If you're not in the mood, then he's perfectly fine rubbing your back as you guys lay together in bed. And because he's dramatic, he'll coo soft, romantic words into your ear the whole time.

Telling you that you're the love of his life, how you're so beautiful, and that he's oh-so lucky to have a lady such as yourself as his lover. He's very much a romantic at heart. Jun loves just lazing around with you, seeing as he doesn't have many days to do so. I mean, running a country is hard work! He can't be sitting in bed all day, no matter how much he wants to.

Similar to Hanayama, he likes to have you on his lap as close to him as physically possible. This means that you’re dragged to meetings (does he have those???), but if I’m being honest, I have no idea what Jun would be doing in his day-to-day lol. I imagine that it’s a lot of sailing and talking to people, likely stealing shit from the government/s. Although Jun doesn’t want you near any danger, so a lot of the times, you’re in his cabin or in the cafeteria (if ships have those).

Anyway, I’m getting off-track, the point is that he’s not necessarily around you, so those small moments where it’s just you and him (lunchtime, in the early morning, and at night), he’ll make the most of it. During lunch, he’ll pull you into his lap and tease you, begging you to feed him whatever food you’ve made. One hand on your waist, while the other is on your thigh, rubbing down to your knee as he looks at you with the most love and admiration you’ve ever seen a man have. 

Of course, you’ll relent and hand feeds him the dish, feeling a little flushed and embarrassed at how he’ll moan at the taste, praising your talent (no matter how bad of a cook you are). At night/in the morning, he’ll pull you close, feeling you up a bit before he has to get ready for the day. I do think that Jun loves getting ready with you in the mornings. Whatever routine you have, no matter how long or short, he wants to be a part of it. It feels oh-so domestic, and it makes his heart all warm and fluffy. Well, being around you in general makes him feel that way, but nonetheless. He enjoys the lazy mornings when he has to roll out of bed, you following after. Sometimes he’ll dance with you, in the kitchen, singing some shanty you’ve grown used to. 

Although it’s a little different that you’re life before, and Jun can be a little much sometimes, you can’t help but smile as Jun pulls you into a dip, kissing the corner of your lips with a cheeky grin. 

[gaybd1]

tell me about autistic Zuko (modern au or canon. Like how he grew up, why it’s justified in canon, how people around him react to it/are they assholes or not) bc I’ve been thinking about him but I can’t seem to articulate all my feelings into words and you’re good at that <3

hahahaha gladly here is a smattering of Facts and Evidence, in no particular order

Fact #1: His special interest is the Avatar. That boy’s done so much research!! (I’m joking with this one and yet… 👀)

Evidence #1: His father was embarrassed of him when he was a kid. This could have been for a variety of reasons including that he’s gay but also if you are trying to raise an heir of a powerful nation, you would see a lot of autism symptoms as a weakness, especially things like awkwardness, difficulty making eye contact, etc

Evidence #2: He doesn’t seem to have a lot of friends growing up which can also be explained in different ways but a kid just following around his sister and her friends all day? sus

Evidence #3: The way he rehearses what he’s going to say to Aang at the Western Air Temple… and the awkwardness of it makes it So Much More… it’s the most really, THE autistic of scenarios. We GOTTA practice big conversations like that before they happen, we just do…

Evidence #4: He borrows from other scripts for social interaction. You know when he’s trying fo get along with everyone at the air temple and he makes tea for them and try to tell a joke? Why does he do that? Because he’s mimicking Iroh, who is probably the most outgoing person in his life, and following exactly what Iroh does to be friendly and ingratiate himself with others…

Evidence #5: Missing social cues. I can’t think of any examples off the top of my head but I think we’ve all seen it. Also “That’s rough, buddy” is something he TOTALLY stole from someone else because he had no idea what he actually was supposed to say in that situation

Fact #2: now HERE’s a guy who feels deeply but is SO bad at expressing or controlling his feelings. Remember when he was worried about the comet and instead of talking about it just ATTACKED HIS FRIENDS?? oof yeah

Important Headcanon #1: Zuko is really sensitive to texture and has ARFID, which does have a high overlap with autistic folks. This “pickiness” causes real problems for him, especially when he’s v busy being the Fire Lord…. He tends to eat the same foods a lot to sustain himself (fire flakes) and makes the same exact tea for himself every single day. He DOES like to bake and cook though, and is quite good at it, even if he won’t eat it all

Headcanon #2: Our boy’s special interests are history, dao swords, and baking

Headcanon #3: Not a fan of eye contact

Theory #1: Our boy Sokka def has that ADHD and I just don’t think it’s that common or easy for ND folks to be in a relationship with NT folks (I have no proof of this but just think about it for a sec) so therefore Zuko must be neurodivergent

This is a big ol’ mess but for a MUCH more comprehensive and comprehensible Auristic Zuko explanation, please refer to this masterpiece of a post which I just found after spending a bunch of time answering this ask lolol

[pearlcages]

can we have some neurodivergent arizona hcs?

Okay this is going to be significantly more than what you asked for, because I honestly— honestly!— believe that most if not all of Arizona’s neurodivergent behaviors are showcased in canon

And if this is not the post for you, then it’s not the post for you! Keep on scrolling, I will not be offended. But if you keep reading, you’re gonna have to take this for what it is: My interpretation of a fictional character. Interpretations vary. Mine is not gospel. But it is mine, and I like it, and I stand by it

I specifically headcanon Arizona as autistic, and this will be a post discussing that, but I've also seen some people say that they interpret her as ADHD and I'm all for it! That wasn't my reading, but there's a lot there to support it in canon. I just don't have an already developed argument for it

Disclaimer 1: Disclosing my autism here through Arizona— because let’s be real, there’s no way I would have noticed any of this if I wasn’t autistic, so there’s no way to avoid disclosing if I want to discuss this— is extremely vulnerable. Most of the people in my day to day irl life don’t even know that I’m autistic. I present in a very palatable, easily digestible way. People like me, and I get away with a lot because people like me. To me, Arizona screams autistic-but-charming, gets-away-with-a-lot

So let's start!

Part 1: Thank you for asking though... I'm super flattered. Super!

Or: Autistic honesty and masking to compensate

Arizona consistently exhibits straightforward, honest behavior that reads as rude to others. Like, all of the time, from day 1

As in almost the first words that come out of her mouth.

Arizona walks into her new position with roller-skates and a smile, immediately insults her predecessor to one of his coworkers, and then is genuinely confused when Bailey doesn't like her

One of the strongest arguments for autistic Arizona is the way she just says blatantly insulting, brutally honest things and genuinely believes that because she's smiling, and because it's true, that it won't be offensive. Which-- works? Kind of? She does get away with it! She's just out here saying whatever she earnestly believes all of the time and getting away with it

She also follows very specific social scripts, and very specific rules for engaging with other people (particularly in seasons 5-6) regardless of if those social scripts/rules are actually appropriate in the moment

The first example we see of this is 5x12 when Alex confronts her for asking him about his Valentine's Day plans-- Arizona knows that in a situation where she is left alone with a colleague for an extended period of time, she's supposed to make conversation. It does not occur to her that the timing might be inappropriate, because while she understands and acknowledges internally that they are both having feelings about what just happened, those feelings do not override her social script. She is unable to recognize the nuance of the situation, and thinks that Alex won't either-- and while she is ultimately positioned as "right" within the narrative of the show, it's interesting that she maintains this behavior (politeness script > genuine social tact) in situations where the show positions her as "wrong"

If you pay attention, Arizona is consistently very regimented in her politeness. She's been taught how to be polite, and she follows that script regardless of the situation. And when people react negatively to that, she's frequently confused

It's also important to note that 5x12 is an episode about empathy, and that Arizona is positioned as being the more empathetic person in this conversation with Alex. I've heard people--psychiatrists, even--describe autism as an "empathy disorder" which is something I choose not to engage with, and something that does not represent all autistic people. If we think of autism as an empathy disorder, then obviously we will not be able to conceptualize Arizona as autistic (Arizona who loves so much and so deeply, who goes into spiraling depressions every single time she loses a patient, who wants to be liked so, so badly)

Arizona is everything but unempathetic, but she does script and she does mask

The deliberateness she approaches casual conversation with, and her consistent inability to recognize when this script becomes inappropriate, reads as autistic to me!

Part of what makes her have such a distinct character voice is that hyper-specific scripting. You can always predict how Arizona is going to react, what Arizona is going to say, because she uses and reuses the same words/sentence patterns throughout her run on Grey's. Her way of speaking is always running along the same pattern with little to no deviation, even across years. I mean lbr, I'm calling it: script script script script script

Another perfect early example of Arizona's hyper-polite, overexuberant scripting is when she turns Callie down in 5x16

We have the smile-- and come on, that smile is masking if I've ever seen it

The rejection, followed immediately by an earnest but abrupt apology

And then-- then!!-- she literally insults Callie ("I work in peds. I spend my whole day around newborns, so I try not to in my personal life") and finishes it off with a thank you

So many viewers had an immediate negative reaction to Arizona after this scene, because it's "condescending" and "rude"-- which, yeah, that's a fair! But what's relevant here is that not only is she being entirely earnest, she's completely unaware that she's being insulting

Arizona genuinely believes that if she follows her scripts exactly, all of the time, nobody will notice. Which works insofar that people don't notice that she's autistic, they just think she's, like, super fucking rude

And isn't that interesting? Because we, as fans, recognize Arizona as someone who's extremely polite, who values politeness. But that's not how people react to her when they meet her

Arizona is straightforward to a fault, and she does not understand (and frequently does not notice) people reacting negatively to her because of it

You could argue that Arizona is completely aware that she's being insulting, but that argument would involve saying that Arizona doesn't care what people think about her, and I really do not see any canon support for that. Az deeply cares what people think about her. She cries when her boss is mad at her. She cries (rejection sensitivity much?)

This scene is also really interesting. Arizona says something truthful but insulting, and Bailey-- who knows her, and who is one of the people who unintentionally helps her manage how she's being perceived-- steps in, and she immediately backtracks. Because someone she trusts has indicated to her that she said the wrong thing. And maybe she would have gotten that just from the Chief's reaction, but at the end of the day she still said it. She said it, and she wasn't trying to be insulting-- she was just being honest. Arizona doesn't know where that line is.

I really cannot emphasize this enough: Arizona. Just. Says. What. She. Thinks.

All of the time!! She can't help herself-- she would stop if she could, but she can't, so she covers it all up with the biggest smile you've ever seen and lots of the most polite things you've ever heard in the most inappropriate contexts they could possibly be said in. And it works! Somehow, her raggedy duct-tape solution to accidentally insulting everyone she meets is remarkably effective

To me, this is masking. She's diverting attention from autistic behaviors specifically so people will continue to like her; through the smiling and the bubbliness and the gregarious chattiness, she's distracting from the fact that she regularly says extremely honest, inappropriate things

Speaking of Bailey-- let's take a look at this scene.

There's something about the genuine confusion in how JCap plays this scene that really stands out to me.

Arizona knows that Bailey has lost someone, and recognizes, empathizes, with the fact that she may be struggling to think about work-- but getting a negative reaction does not occur to her as a possibility until Bailey responds negatively (see image below)

Within the text of the conversation, Arizona says directly that she does not mean to be insensitive, but her values are too rigid for her to change tracks. More on that later.

Part 2: Maybe I don't understand people. I don't see things.

Or: Guessing how other people feel and sometimes getting it super, super wrong

This part is going to be pretty short, but I can't not include it

At the end of s5, Arizona says it, point blank:

And this is so early into her run on Grey's that it has to be understood as something fundamental about her character. The writer's want us, explicitly, to understand Arizona as someone who occasionally misses out on social cues and knows it

In either 6x1 or 6x2, After George dies Callie says, "And Arizona keeps sending me doughnuts." and we learn that that's what Arizona did when her brother died. She ate doughnuts. Doughnuts made her feel better, so she sends Callie doughnuts when George dies. That's how Arizona expresses empathy in times where she knows her script is inadequate, by treating people the way she wanted to be treated-- by caring for them in the way that makes the most sense for her

Something that a lot of autistic people do, and that a lot of non-autistics read as unempathetic, is connecting their personal experiences of an emotion to another person's experience of that same emotion. I.e., if you've recently lost a loved one, an autistic person may express empathy by sharing about when they lost a loved one. Another example is if you've just gone through a breakup, and autistic person may tell you about a breakup they've been through

This reads as self-centered and unempathetic sometimes, because it feels like the autistic person is centering their own emotions in a situation about you-- when really, they're just trying to connect

Which makes this conversation in 12x4 between Arizona and April hilarious, because she can recognize it in others but not herself

(April and Arizona are two non-diagnosed later in life autistic women with advanced masking, btw. Not only that, April and Arizona are the same kind of autistic, which is why their friendship is so special!)

Part 3: I'm a good man in a storm.

Or: Black and white thinking, moral codes, and autistic sense of identity

I've said this before, and I will say it again-- Arizona is a fundamentally moral person. She stands on her morals, and she suffers for her morals. Only the disruption of her fundamental sense of self takes this part of her away, because her sense of right and wrong is her sense of identity. Arizona sees herself as someone who is good, and she knows what, specifically, it means to be good

Love your country, love your family, protect the things you love. She doesn't deviate and she doesn't play around with it, ever. Arizona decides on something, and she follows through

In order to understand Arizona as a character, we have to isolate her fundamental beliefs. To me, these are kindness, service, and autonomy. We also must understand that outside of the post-crash decimation of her fundamental "self", Arizona does not behave in ways that go against her morals. Ever.

Arizona the idealist, Arizona the self-righteous, Arizona who lives and dies by her beliefs, who does not break her own rules. There's no room for interpretation; there's right, and there's wrong

One of the ways this manifests that I keep coming back to is her belief in autonomy. In 7x18 when it comes down to a choice between Callie or Sofia, Arizona chooses Sofia not because she, personally, values Sofia over Callie but because it's what Callie would want. It's the choice Callie would make. And, yes, Arizona hates that choice, but she honors it. Even if it means the love of her life, the woman she just proposed to, dies. Autonomy is a core value, which means she'll suffer personally to make sure it's upheld

And in s9, when her own autonomy is stripped away, she loses her shit. Not just because of the leg, but because it was her decision. Hers. And autonomy is a core value.

"What's different now? No, say it, 'cause it was perfect. It's not a decision that I should be making for you."

This isn't good and it isn't healthy, but it's a direct reflection of Arizona's sense of morality. She isn't being hypocritical here-- she's already shown that she's willing to let Callie die to respect her autonomy. It's not a 1:1 comparison because the situations are wildly different, but this is about idealism. It's not about what's best, it's about what's right.

Returning to that scene with Bailey from part 1. At first, Arizona does not realize that she is being inappropriate, but this scene is significant for more than that. In almost every situation (see: You're my old friend. Older. Older friend.) where Arizona misjudges the social landscape, she pivots very quickly.

This scene is a key example of Arizona's exception-- when being polite contradicts her core values. (In this case, service). Despite realizing that she has crossed a social boundary with Bailey, she pushes the conversation forward anyways, because not doing so would mean worse care for her patient.

"Dr. Bailey... I hear that. And I don't mean to be insensitive, but this kid? This kid's still alive. And I don't know what's wrong with him, not a clue, so I need you to work."

There are several scenes like this one, where Arizona makes this exception and only this exception to her sense of social propriety

It's rigid and uncompromising. There are specific closely held ideals, and a script, and those closely held ideals are the only reason to deviate from the script.

And she's super. freaking. judgmental. particularly when it comes to morality

One of the most horrific examples of Arizona's black and white thinking is when she tells Jackson about April's pregnancy, because it's the right thing to do. Or, it's the right thing to do... to Arizona. Because she fails to recognize the nuance and emotional undertones of April's specific situation. There is right (being honest) and wrong (lying) and she absolutely cannot recognize of the many choices between those things until she receives the overwhelming feedback that actually, she is wrong here

Arizona is an incredibly rigid character. She very rarely understands or seeks nuance unless specifically forced to. I think, in large part, this is why the cheating is such a significant character deviation for us as an audience-- and why Arizona never fully forgives herself for it. Everything that goes wrong in her life from that point forward is punishment for the cheating, and Arizona truly believes that she deserves it.

Even retrospectively, I believe there is a part of her that thinks back on the cheating as earning the plane crash, that wraps those two things up in each other until they're indistinguishable, and then justifies all of her future suffering in perpetuity through it.

The first time we see Arizona truly go against her own ideals has to be post-crash, because it would take the complete destruction of her sense of self for her to go through with something like that. She has to be completely detached from her identity first, because there is no separating her morals from her "self". There's no bending that code until she's so far gone she no longer knows who she is. Arizona simply does not compromise. When she does, it is the kind of compromise that is so unreasonable, so extreme, that it ruins her life-- and she never forgets that. No nuance, ever. She is either living and dying by her morals, and setting fire to them in one wildly destructive action

April does something pretty similar during her crisis of faith, and it reads as autistic there as well! "If I live in a world where my extremely strict morals no longer make the world make sense, then nothing matters and I must set fire to the world."

Part 4: Grey's Anatomy and accidentally writing autistic characters.

So here come the disclaimers: I do not think that Arizona was intentionally written as autistic, and if you asked Shonda Rhimes about it, I think she'd be deeply confused. Like, really confused

But, like, since when has writers writing autistic characters accidentally stopped those characters from being interpreted as autistic? Just look at Dan Harmon and Abed from Community

And Grey's is just so, so consistently guilty of this, because Grey's deals in these huge, larger than life personalities. It has to. Being larger than life is the heart of the show. Look at Cristina and April! They're these extremely different, complicated, deeply autistic-coded women, each with their own self-expressions and relationships to empathy. April is annoying and perky and lacks empathy and carries around a tear-stained notebook of self help book affirmations. And Cristina... I don't even think I have to go there, honestly

These are not characters written to be portrayals of women with autism, and frankly they'd probably be way worse representation for autistic women if they were. We don't let autistic women have varied or diverse presentations. We don't think of the pretty, charming, talkative doctor who likes babies and cigarettes as possibly being autistic but that doesn't mean she isn't. Undiagnosed adult autistic women are everywhere. Everywhere.

(And don't get me started on autistics and addictive tendencies, or how smoking is a great way to have something to do with your hands and mouth without looking weird)

I think a lot of the knee-jerk, negative reaction when people interpret beloved characters as autistic comes down to the belief that autism manifests in exclusively bad ways, ways that inherently make the character less likable

But a lot of the things I like about myself are associated with my being autistic. I'm meticulously detailed, I care very deeply about the things I'm passionate about, I approach my intimate relationships with intentionality and consistency, and it makes me a better writer. It makes me dedicated to being better. I like that I'm autistic! I wouldn't want to be neurotypical, even if sharing that with people is a vulnerable thing

So, I don't know, you don't have to agree with me but at least consider it

[your-unfriendlyghost]

4, 5, 7, 14

(Okay I really liked these ones fyi)

4. Rank the main 7.

  Ooh tough one. I guess right now, in order of favorite to least favorite, I’d have to go Sodapop, Two-Bit, Steve, Johnny, Ponyboy, Dally, and then finally Darry. But it’s pretty close, and the order changes day by day honestly- I like all of them a lot, y’know? I guess the only one I don’t think about too often is Darry. I still like him and think he’s a really well-written character- I just don’t have a lotta original thoughts about him, is all, whereas I do about all the others. 

5. What are your fave ships?

  In a truly shocking turn of events, I, a frequent draw-er and writer of Stevepop, am going to say Stevepop. I dunno, something about them just makes me happy. Reminds me of like…daydreams I had when I was twelve and crushing on my best friend, and trying to get her attention by doing stupid things and whatever…god I don’t really know how to explain why I like it. Before this fandom I didn’t usually ship things, to be honest. But I guess when I did it’d be stuff like Jesslake in Infinity Train, where it’s the sorta thing that can be seen as platonic or romantic. I reckon Stevepop scratches a similar itch in my brain lol

  But I also really like Marcia x Two-Bit, which I haven’t really talked about here much- They had good chemistry, y’know? I oughta draw something about them sometime

  And then finally there’s my DIY crack-ish ship Soda x Steve x Evie. I like them! It’s all the things I like about Stevepop, plus there’s a cool girl in the mix! I love cool girls! More folks should think about them i think

  I do like other ships okay too- like the Tarry crowd has dragged me in, and sometimes the Jally crowd does too, along with Purly and occasionally Johnnyboy. I’m not an active participant, but when I come across it, I sorta mentally nod and say “nice”, you dig? They’re like…my ship-in-laws. Or like…milk duds and hershey bars- candy I still enjoy, but reach for only after I’m out of milky ways and twizzlers.

7. What are your fave non-romantic relationships? (This can be close friends, familial, enemies or even just acquaintances)

  Two-Bit and Pony! I like them a lot. Their interactions in the book were some of my favorite parts. That line when Two-Bit was worried about Ponyboy using that broken bottle on the Socs…ugh that part was great. I remember reading it for the first time and just sitting there thinking about how much I liked that detail.

  Then on the opposite side of the coin, Steve and Pony lol. I LOVE how Pony doesn’t initially like Dally or Steve, and yet Dally’s chill with Pony…but with Steve the disdain is mutual. Jk I don’t think Steve really hates Pony- but he definitely thinks Pony’s kinda annoying. I like the idea of him watching out for Pony anyways though, like at school especially now that Soda’s not going.

14. Tell us five of your headcanons you basically see as canon

Sodapop has ADHD and maybe (?) dyslexia, but it’s the 60s so he won’t find out till he’s well into adulthood

Marcia gave Two-Bit her real number, and was disappointed when he didn’t call it. I like to imagine they end up remeeting at some point and going out together- even if that’s kinda unrealistic lol

Steve hated Dally when he first rolled into town, because Dally was everything he really wanted to be- tough, cool, and street-smart. And he was also scared of losing Soda, who thought Dally rocked- because Dally’s from New York and rides in rodeos! Eventually they became buddies though when Dally gave Steve a compliment or something. Not even a particularly good one- something like “Hey you ain’t bad at fighting”- just barely enough for Steve to feel like Dally’s earned a little bit of his loyalty. Might write fic/make a comic for this- it’s kinda niche but I think the idea is funny

Steve and Soda secretly listen to the Beach Boys at the DX. They can’t tell anyone because it’s not tuff to like a dumb California band. And Ponyboy would like the Beatles if he listened to them, but he doesn’t, so he won’t realize that until years after Beatlemania has died down

Steve is not just a Ponyboy hater but also a horses-in-general hater. He thinks horses are scary and unpredictable and that cars were invented for a reason. He was secretly relieved when Mr. Curtis stopped Soda from riding rodeos, because seeing Soda on a crazy horse gave him mad anxiety. Pretended he was sad though for Soda’s sake

Thanks so much for asking!! I loved answering these so much lol, definitely let me know your thoughts too on ‘em!

[moronkyne]

fanon and canon has mixed up so much for me in this fandom I completely forgot that Darlin’ wasn’t canonically called tank 😭 AND Lasko doesn’t canonically have glasses? Asher doesn’t canonically have vitiligo?? dude I’m gonna go insane

Oh my god, yess. I was just about to make a post about this. I think a lot of fanon content that’s basically glued into these characters are because of stereotypes (not necessarily bad)

Oh? Laskos an anxiety filled nerd who stutters a lot? He fidgets and has his glasses! Asher’s icon has a splotchy patch above an eye! Resembles vitiligo!

This can go on and on. Some characters do have canonical appearances though! Like Gavin having tanned skin or all of the vamps having silver eyes :3

Darlin’ was called Tank maybe ONCE I believe, so why does the redacted fandom stick with it? Because it rolls off the tongue. It feels more like a real name than Darlin’ does.

Even with headcanons of things that aren’t physical. Asher’s ADHD? Yeah, it seems like he would qualify. So his ADHD seems canon because of the way he acts and expresses himself but it’s not. (Coming from an ADHD have, don’t cancel me /hj) Sam ran away from home? He’s got a [insert crude family dynamic].

Non-physical headcanons tend to be a bit more reasonable but HAVE FUN WITH IT.

Also I’m a SORTA aware that fanon means something the fandom has kinda adopted as reality even if it’s not, and it’s cool to see people push past those barriers.

Anyways, good talk. Good talk.

[marvelousmechanicalmind]

2024 Tumblr Intro!

Call me Casi / Erin !

I Identify as Boyflux, and use sunbeing gender, Though i ALWAYS Use He / It.

A few silly people call me Mr. the Electric, so that’s alright too. ^_^

i AM Mind from CCCC, I’m a fictionkin.

I am also C!Slimecicle & B.E.N drowned

I am a minor.

I have Autism, ADHD, Anxiety, and depression. I’m also physically disabled, i have peters anomaly in one eye. [google it! it’s actually really cool to learn about.]

I suffer from extreme anxiety, and tend to spiral into paranoia episodes frequently. Please, don’t bring up anything in relation to incest, noncon, or extreme gore

#1 Darrel Hater [/LH, IJ]

Kin Blog ; @mechanicalmalpractice

Kin Blog (B.E.N) ; @biggestslenderhater

I have strong opinions on some things, and no opinions on most. Do what you want as long as you aren’t hurting people mentally, physically, or emotionally. You’re welcome here!

I don’t have a DNI but it would be preferred if Dream Apologists, Defenders, and Stans stayed off of this blog. Along with people who are against shipping, headcanons & such. at that point the entirety of Tumblr isn’t for you.

As for boundaries, don’t bring up or show me graphic gore. Dont bring up gun violence. Don’t make jokes about The Juno Incident without permission, The people that can know who they are. Don’t make jokes about the voice modulator thingy, OR insults about it. Again, the people that can know who they are.

I’m fine with NSFW, unless it’s literally stuff that’s counted as a crime.

i’m going to specify for people who are really uncomfortable with it, i’m okay and enjoy Jashshipping. Mostly platonic, but the romantic stuff is fine. Not like, the power hours and stuff, but HMS shipping. but on the note of the power hours, i don’t like shipping real people. there’s a grey line and Heart, Mind, and Soul have been referred to as fictional time and time again, plus as a fictionkin and a lovesick teen, i like daydreaming. I’ve started to get scared of actual harassment over my opinions so this counts as a warning for people who don’t like that, to stay off of my blog./NM, LH

My Special Interests include;

Chonny Jash / CCCC

Showbiz/CEC Pizza Dreamworks Trolls

History, in general.

The DSMP

Marvel / The MCU

Tally Hall

FNaF

Helluva Boss

Some other things (i don’t know what counts as a special interest):

Buffy the Vampire Slayer

Psych

Captain Underpants

Wordgirl

Weird Al

Sesame Street

Star Wars

Vocaloid

Grease

Interests that tend to loop back to me:

Tangled The Series/VaT7K

Sonic The Hedgehog

Paw Patrol

Piggy

Chip n’ Dale

The Lego Movie

Animaniacs

and uh, i like words if that’s anything.

Note: I do not support Dream, Wilbur Soot, Georgenotfound, Aaron Fechter, or Vivziepop.

My Heart & Soul

@homosexual-homosapien69 💜

@silliestofsoups 🔱

Friends! @tazzymcclazzy

@chonnysinferno

@muckablucka

Cool People

@irusanw4

@purpleleafsyt

@cdpdoodler

@godofautism

@tallyhoot

@finleyforevermore

@safaristylez

[Friends & Cool people will be updated accordingly.]

Annnd Links!

[riah-yorke-lex]

Spoilers for Sonic Prime, like all of it.

^^^^^^^^^^

Sonic has ADHD and Nine has autism.

I mean I know the regular headcanons for Sonic and Tails are already there, but hear me out.

Neurodivergent people have trouble communicating a lot of times and miscommunicate.

Btw I have both, so I’m just speaking from my own experience.

Both characters are flawed. Sonic has lost his entire home and friends. Nine never really had friends and prefers to be alone.

Anyone who wants to say Nine is a villain can leave my page.

It’s a kid’s show, and Nine is the second most important character. The writers won’t kill him off or make him pure evil. Sonic will make up with everyone and find ways to save everyone in the end. Sorry to ruin suspense, but it is a kids show. I’m not saying that means it can’t have awesome character arcs. (ATLA has awesome character arcs, betrayal and redemption + lots of dark elements, but none of the main characters DIED)

Nine will probably cause something bad to happen in his rage, constructing something dangerous with the shards or he’ll cause the entire council to come after him, or both. Nine might cause something bad to happen and then feel guilty and help Sonic. If sonic can find a solution that doesn’t destroy those living in the shatter spaces, then Nine would probably come around. I don’t think Sonic realizes the consequences of his actions.

And that’s just the thing. Sonic jumps into every situation without thinking it through, something which irritates everyone around him. Meanwhile, Nine is incredibly methodical and thoughtful in his approach. Nine is driven by LOGIC while Sonic is driven by EMOTIONS. Not to say Nine doesn’t have emotions and can’t lose control, as we will likely see in S3. However, it’s generally how their brains work.

Sonic is gullible and falls into lots of traps. He isn’t all that smart. He’s good at thinking on his feet, but he often doesn’t think before he leaps into something. Shadow did mention about how the people in the shatterspaces aren’t real or whatever. He means that if they just put the prism back together, all those variants will cease to exist since they are all just different parts of the originals. Sonic sees them as real people though, and wants to help them, but he also desperately wants his reality back. He doesn’t realize that Nine would likely cease to exist if he simply put the prisms together. This would devastate sonic if he found out.

Nine is very rational in his actions. He doesn’t feel he can trust anyone as he has been traumatized by the world he grew up on. He longs for a place of solitude, a place he can go to whenever he needs to be away from everyone. He’s rather sit in his own head with his inventions. He wants Sonic to join him here because Sonic is the first friend he ever had. He intentionally doesn’t tell Sonic everything, because he has thought this through. He hopes Sonic will see his side and see him as a real person and not just another version of Tails. Sonic has an issue of projecting his vision of Tails onto Nine. He does it because he misses Tails. I know Sonic, DOES respect Nine as his own person, but Nine does not understand that, and Sonic, not thinking before he speaks, says something hurtful. Nine can come across as selfish, but all he wants is a safe place. As a neurodivergent person, that is so relatable. Sonic’s safe place is Green Hill, and he wants its back. From what we know (although I’m sure they’ll find a solution where everyone can live, again, it’s a kids show), those two things cannot coexist. If Sonic realizes this, he’ll realize he has to sacrifice his shatterapace friends to get Green Hill back, and is that a good thing after all? Nine is scared for his life basically, as he might not exist anymore. It’s a very valid fear.

They didn’t communicate their needs to each other because they were in the middle of fighting the council and didn’t have time to think it through, plus Sonic is impatient and also bad at communicating.

Nine is NOT a villain. He’s a traumatized autistic kid who has trouble thinking with other people’s needs in mind. Sonic wants to help EVERYONE, even people he doesn’t like much like Dread and Shadow, but he doesn’t consider the wider consequences of his actions.

Thank you for coming to my TED talk.

[its-a-me-mango]

ART/OC’S Q&A

Do you take requests?

No, but I do take suggestions! The main difference is that I can pick and choose between suggestions for ideas that I like and want to draw from, you're welcome to send in suggestions whenever! Obviously don't take it personally if I never draw your suggestion, they are just drawing ideas to me and I would go insane if I drew EVERY single suggestion I get!

Can you draw my OC/AU?

As much as I love everyone's OC’s and AU’s, I cannot draw for everyone, and to be honest I am a lot less likely to draw someone's OC/AU if I’m requested. Don’t take it personally, I have a weird thing where I would much rather gift someone art rather than be asked to draw it for them, it makes it feel like my idea and therefore I’m more passionate about doing it for them! It’s why I don’t request people directly to draw anything for me. Again everyone's ideas are amazing and I love seeing how creative people are. It's just that I'd much rather gift people art of their OC/AU than be requested to draw it, I will draw things for people when I have the motivation to do so!

Can I draw your characters/AU's/designs?

Yes! You are always welcome to draw any of my characters, AU's or designs! Please make sure to @ me in your own post if you do so I can see it and reblog it! I'd prefer to have any gifts for me be posted instead of sent to my ask box, as asks can sit in there for a while and I want others to see your amazing work ASAP, though I don't mind either way!

Can I write something with your character/AU’s/headcanons?

Yes!!! That would be so awesome!!! You are welcome to come to me to ask for advice on writing about my characters and stuff but yes you are welcome to write for them! I cannot write to save my life (dyslexia/ADHD mega combo lol) so I look up to anyone who can write fanfics and such, you guys are so cool!

Can I draw/write my sona/OC interacting with your characters?

Yes! I love character interactions so much so you are more than welcome to draw my characters interacting with yours, just nothing NSFW, hate speech or violent towards my characters or yours (angst doesn't count lol). Everything else is pretty much fair game, I love seeing my characters interacting with others it lets me learn about other people and their own amazing characters!

Shipping is fine but only if I know you! I don't mind shipping with Mango or Smug but not Telly (they're literally a baby so don't do that, weird as hell), again nothing NSFW though lol

Can I use your work for icons/banners/edits/etc.

Yes you can! No need to ask permission, I would appreciate credit being given to me, either to this blog or to my Twitter account, an @ to either account name is enough for me though a link is preferred. You are welcome to edit my work for icons/banners/edits as well, again as long as credit is given.

Can I repost your work?

Reposting is only allowed provided credit is given! Again, either to this blog or to my Twitter account, an @ to either account name is enough for me though a link is preferred. Do not repost my work claiming it as your own, that's weird. If i’ve drawn something for you you’re more than welcome to repost it with credit as well!

Can I copy/trace your work?

Do I really have to say this? No please don't do that, you don't learn from tracing other artists work, use real life references images if you need help learning anatomy. I don't consider style copying to be a thing so I'm fine with people incorporating my style into their own, and sketching over my work to get a rough sketch is fine, just don't line over it and call it your own.

Can I used your work for AI?

No, fuck off.

Why do you tag some of your art as suggestive?

Just to be safe, I know I draw “sus” stuff sometimes and I mainly want to make sure people keep themselves safe when viewing my stuff. My blog will never explicitly post anything NSFW, the suggestive tag on my art is mainly for sex jokes, pinup style clothing/posing or ass. Again it is just to be safe, you’re not obliged to reblogs with the same tag as me, it’s just to make sure people don’t see something they don’t want to.

Who are the recurring characters that keep showing up here?

Oh, you mean my children? Let me give a rundown:

Mango (He/They) - Mango is my sona! I use him all the time for answering things and also just in general. He is part Dr Mario and part MLP pony from another dimension that somehow got sucked into the SMG4 universe. He works as a doctor in the SMG4 universe, he’s a bit cynical at times but he’s still a kind and caring guy, he’s just sick and tired of all the BS that happens in the SMG4 universe.

Smug (He/Him) - Smug was originally a weird bootleg SMG3 plushie that got turned into a human somehow, he is still a plushie just much bigger now. He spends all his time scamming people in various ways to get what he wants out of them and has no care or regard for them. He has a friend/partner who’s a bootleg SMG4 plush, however she wasn’t transformed as much as him and therefore is the same as before, she can just move and talk now.

Telly (They/Them) - Telly is a happy little accident that somehow occurred out of nowhere, they are the child of Mr Puzzles! They are a shy yet friendly little child who just wants to make friends and watch TV. They struggle with meeting people due to their speaker not working as they can only make static noises to communicate, but they are adventurous and always looking to have fun! They love and look up to their father a lot, he's their biggest inspiration.

If more get added I’ll put them here, you are always welcome to ask me about any of them! I love talking about them! All of them have their own tags on my blog that are free to be used by others as well!

Do you have any AU’s?

Yes! I have a werewolf SMG4 AU! I need to work on it. Werewolf SMG4 is a version of SMG4 who's been cursed to turn into an out of control werewolf every night, his friends are constantly working to try and find a solution to this curse while 4 is busy trying not to get anyone killed. It's very angsty and sad I promise, one day I will work on it more, you are welcome to ask about it whenever! It might motivate me to work on it more lol.

[ryelleart]

Can we have more headcanons between both brothers usagi and yuichi?

And there interactions with leo along with the whple hamato clan🥰

Oh wow, thank you for asking! I haven’t had anyone really expressing interest in this little idea of mine like this; it makes me so happy 🥰

I’ve actually been thinking about the brothers a little more since I shared their designs, and here’s what else I came up with:

Usagi is autistic and Yuichi has ADHD bc I tend to project onto my characters

When they were kids, the brothers would do almost everything together despite their age gap

Usagi doesn’t have any allergies, while Yuichi has a laundry list of allergies (if you threw a dart at a list of every allergy, odds are he has whatever it landed on)

Usagi is a perfectionist with a fear of failure (is that redundant?)

Usagi is 4 years older than Yuichi, and he abuses his older brother privilege all the time (it used to be for silly, petty things like claiming first dibs for something or bossing his brother around, but now it’s more along the lines of “I’m responsible for you, so stop arguing with me and do what I say”)

Usagi became more serious and reserved than he used to be with his new role as his brother’s guardian, which affected his relationship with Yuichi

Yuichi hates when people lie to him (which includes keeping secrets)

Usagi is overprotective of his brother and will do absolutely anything to keep him safe

They don’t regularly hang out anymore, but Usagi still tries to do stuff with Yuichi from time to time

They customized their hoodies themselves (it was one of Usagi’s early attempts to bond with his brother after losing their parents)

One of Yuichi’s favorite hobbies is messing with his brother, from pranks to meaningless debates where he intentionally argues for an objectively wrong stance bc watching Usagi get heated over trying to convince Yuichi he’s wrong is funny

When he’s not busy working or taking care of his brother, Usagi likes to read about ancient history (he’s also into fan fiction and conspiracy theories, but he’ll never admit that out loud)

I won’t get too much into it here, but Usagi struggles to provide for Yuichi after losing a job, so he eventually becomes a bounty hunter with Gen as a last-ditch effort to make money

He doesn’t tell Yuichi about this

He does tell Leo, partly bc he trusts him to keep Yuichi from finding out, but mostly bc Leo was his first official bounty so keeping it a secret from him would be pointless

Speaking of Leo, he and Usagi don’t actually hang out after he convinces the bounty hunters not to take him in, yet they somehow keep running into each other in the Hidden City

Usagi initially finds Leo irritating, while Leo thinks Usagi is rude; they change their tune once they decide to hang out for real and get to know each other

They complement each other pretty well; Leo gets Usagi to open up and have fun, and Usagi acts as Leo’s confidante for things that he can’t really bring himself to share with his family

Although he acts more serious than Leo, Usagi’s not above being pulled into his shenanigans

Yuichi is pretty similar to Leo personality-wise, so ofc they get along great

They also get along with the rest of Leo’s family once they meet; Yuichi obviously favors Leo the most, but Mikey is a close second, and Usagi is closest to April (they can swap stories about all the jobs they’ve had!)

I’m torn about which direction to take Yuichi’s relationship with Donnie; I like the idea that they’re just so diametrically opposed and they get on each others nerves all the time, but I also like the idea of them actually being pretty close (mayhaps Donnie sees his beloved twin in this kid and develops a soft spot for him?)

I feel like Raph would absolutely adore the brothers once he gets to know them, though I feel like his relationship with Usagi would be a bit complicated; he’s initially a bit overprotective of Leo for reasons I won’t mention here, but he ends up really liking/relating to Usagi, so doesn’t stay that way for long… that is, until a certain point in Usagi’s relationship with Leo 👀

Usagi and Leo ofc catch feelings for each other over time, but Leo’s bad history with dating (again, I won’t get into it here) kinda keeps him from acting on anything

They do, however, tell each other how they feel anyway, so even though they’re not together yet, they know they’re into each other

Ok I’m gonna stop here bc I think I might’ve gonna a bit overboard lol. Besides, that’s all I can share without getting into angst territory 😉

As for stuff like comics, I genuinely have no idea how far I’m gonna take this; will I wanna turn this into an ongoing comic? Will I stick to making some sketches here and there? Idk! Ig we’ll see

[monstersinthecosmos]

Hi!! I would love to hear your thoughts about Marius' experience of captivity and how this affects his relationship with Armand. You alluded to this in Gallows Bird and I think that's a super interesting thread to pull

[ Let me drop these two fics real quick to get it out of the way for reference sorry if this is obnoxious LOL but Gallows Bird (Marius/Armand) and The Lotus Eater (Armand/Daniel) !! ]

Asdgahsdk oh boy

I have so many deep nuanced feelings about Marius de Romanus so be patient with me while I try to sketch this all out, I DON’T EVEN KNOW WHERE TO START!

So one thing I want to mention off the bat, which is not necessarily canon VC but is relevant to my fics and how I write, is that I process a lot of ND/ADHD stuff when I write, and this goes way back before I even knew I had ADHD. So even going back to like my earlier VC fics from like 5-6 years ago, I think I was constantly inserting traits of myself into my fics and trying to process them in the way that I thought they were just character flaws at the time. AND LIKE this is also relevant because I wrote Gallows Bird to be directly correlating to my Devil’s Minion fics. For example, in The Lotus Eater, one of my huge emotional cornerstones in that fic/me talking about my own perceived character flaws, was the “he had been careless with this boy” theme. And I repeated that in Gallows Bird on purpose to link them lol. So that example is like, I was really inspired by like how ADHD can ruin things on accident; like you don’t take care of something, miss a deadline, break something by being careless even though you DO CARE. At the time when I wrote The Lotus Eater I had no idea about ADHD so I just thought it was like this bad part of my personality that I was really struggling with. I am more forgiving of that now.

And I connect this also to Marius in Gallows Bird because like, something I really struggled with as a person is like the ND/ADHD impulse to like RELATE TO PEOPLE when they’re trying to talk, like bringing up my own experience as a way to say “Something like this happened to me too so I can empathize with you”, which is always well intentioned! And I’ve seen so much convo from ND folks that struggle with this because NT folks tend to misunderstand it as changing the subject/being narcissistic/whatever.

Anyway!!!!!!!!! Sorry for that preamble but I’m saying that like, I kind of approach writing Marius as a mix of canon & projection, because yknow it’s my fuckin story and I feel like it lol but I think like the fun of fanfic and what makes people’s styles unique and interesting is our mix of perspectives and personalities and like how we choose to fill in the blanks in canon or interpret characters, right?

Canon Marius makes a few comments when he meets Armand about how like, this is someone who is as bruised and damaged as he is, and someone who can heal him, and he feels their souls understand each other. And Canon Marius is like, arrogant enough (by his own admission!) to see the absolute HORRIFIC trauma the Armand went through and go “Oh yeah I had horrific trauma too.”

How do we compare Armand’s trauma to Marius’s trauma? Idk. No one can answer that because we all respond to trauma differently. So I think to some extent there’s some headcanon territory here of how everyone interprets Marius, and do we believe him that his trauma was SO SEVERE that it IS on par with what’s happened to Armand? Or do we believe what he went through isn’t so bad/was 1500 years ago and he’s being obnoxious by comparing the two because he should be healed by now?

I’d also ask like, to what extent is neither true/is it not that fucking deep, like is Marius simply saying “wow this looks really bad, I want to know him for centuries so he has time to grow and heal”; like perhaps Marius at this point sees his captivity & murder as this awful thing that happened to him 1500 years ago and maybe it feels sort of disconnected.

BUT I DON’T KNOW, the thing about Marius is that he’s so fucking stoic! Like I know I’ve brought it up a couple times recently but it’s because I was reading some Marcus Aurelius to put in Gallows Bird lol so using that to like fill in some blanks with Marius, he reads like someone who is constantly trying to rationalize away his own emotions. And like! IDK! Maybe beliefs about psychology are always a phases or temporary until we learn more, but reading him in 2023 I just call bullshit on that! It doesn’t work that way! So who’s to say that his 1500 year old trauma isn’t actually still very close to the surface, and who’s to say he can’t be easily retraumatized whenever it comes up because he’s never meaningfully recovered?

AND LIKE FOR PEOPLE WHO HAVE EXPERIENCED TRAUMA THE AFTERMATH IS SO OFTEN ABOUT JUST FINDING CONTROL OVER WHATEVER YOU CAN, NO MATTER HOW USELESS OR UNHEALTHY IT IS. And that's also the sort of central thesis of Gallows Bird; giving Armand a space to process his trauma where he's in control. And for Marius it's just really sad how often he tries to control his own personality, his own feelings, his own mask, the way people perceive him, and it's such a struggle for him that it always eventually collapses.

I want to pause here for a second too and bring up a couple old posts I’ve written so I’m not repeating myself too much LOL but let’s also consider:

Trauma Hole Theory and if vampires are stuck forever within the trauma of their turning

Marius & Armand’s equal-opposite religious trauma

Marius’s struggle with feeling emotion

I think if we start dissecting ANY vampire in VC we’ll see thematic ways that their turning has traumatized them forever, between the violence/trauma around the act itself but also whatever ways they’ve been frozen as their mortal selves. Lestat is a perpetually insecure 20 year old who can’t emotionally regulate and must prove himself to everybody, Louis is someone who didn’t want to live at all and was given eternal life rather than death, Armand is deeply wounded and fucked up but is having like 2 years of relative peace and safety. And Marius is like, older, has lived life, knows what he’s losing and gaining, and has his entire worldview shattered after spending a year resenting religious zealots only to find out that everything they believed was true.

So I bring all these points up because I don’t think there’s a simple answer or a direct correlation here. Marius recognizes that they’ve each suffered a trauma, but he hasn’t really dealt with his own in a meaningful way, therefore he is not equipped to help Armand deal with his either.

I constantly go back to when Marius hits him after they come back from Kiev and I think this really hammers it home for me—Marius is someone who wants to strangle all of his emotions into submission, and he’s really trying to believe that it’s a matter of willpower to simply NOT FEEL THINGS. So much of Marcus Aurelius is about this! AND IN SOME WAYS LIKE, YEAH THIS IS MAYBE AN ANCIENT VERSION OF CBT??? Like we do CBT to patiently teach ourselves to think differently, but it’s obviously not as easy as simply shutting your emotions off or bullying yourself out of feeling any. And he’s trying SO SO hard to be this way, and it doesn’t work, so it’s not going to work on Armand either!

And like it’s not Marius simply being a dickhead, simply being abusive; I do think he’s really trying, but he’s fucking lost! HE HAS LIVED LIES! And god it just really hurts to see him as someone who struggles with this shit and who lies to himself about it, LIKE WHO HASN’T BEEN THERE? How many of us who struggle with mental health haven’t had those moments like, those tiny glimpses seeing behind the veil and being honest with yourself, but being so fucking powerless and not knowing what to do with it.

I know I’ve personally had moments of realization like “I am going to be like this forever” and it’s SO defeating, and imagining that sentiment for someone who will LIVE FOREVER just hurts me so bad!

We see this trope in media sometimes—certainly it’s based in real life!—of parents projecting onto children, trying to correct mistakes by breaking a cycle, but which only serves to treat their child like an extension of themselves and not a whole individual. So I think of that, too—Marius seeing himself in someone who was also abducted, and even though he also plans to turn Armand, he wants it to be beautiful and gentle! (He even changes his mind about it several times before he does it in a panic because Armand is dying! {this is heavily referenced in Gallows Bird because he realizes he's fucked Armand up to much to let him live anyway.} ) He also is sorta trying to fake it till he makes it with all this emotional stuff; like even though he KNOWS he can’t simply shut emotions off, he’s still trying to teach Armand to. And going back to Marius being a lil arrogant, I think sometimes he does project himself onto other people, or treat people better if they remind him of himself. So like, projecting some wounded version of himself onto Armand to try to rescue, vs risking it all for Lestat a few centuries later because someone who reminds him of himself actually WANTS to be rescued.

The IRONY too that like he spends his whole time in captivity as a skeptic, not believing that there is a God in the Grove, and for that entity to turn out to be a vampire!!! Marius presenting HIMSELF as a god-figure to Armand, but trying to be safe and friendly about it! I don’t know man I’m really fucking hsdkjgladsghkjl upset right now lol

And after all that like, not really knowing what exactly happened to Armand to indoctrinate him into the cult, just knowing that he’s thriving with them, that he gave it all up to be their leader, is such a betrayal of everything and so traumatizing!

Gosh.

Anyway.

I DON’T’ KNOW WHERE TO START I DON’T KNOW WHERE TO END, THINKING ABOUT THIS FUCKS ME UP I HOPE THIS ANSWERS YOUR QUESTION LOL

[poodle-anon]

☔️ for the ask? I love hearing about concepts! Especially the ones that’ll never hit the paper.

-miniscrew

OH BOY this took a minute to think on but I think I got one @miniscrew-anon

For the life of me I can’t figure out how to write it, but I really really want to explore Wild’s relationship with his dysphoria/lack thereof. I’ve genuinely tried putting it to paper more than once, but each time I can’t seem to get the vibe quite down in a way that resonates with what I enjoy about it in my head

Under a read more because it’s long, and has to do with HRT, gender dysphoria, panic attacks, discussion of needles, and trans!Wild having an overall Bad Time for a day within a 99.99% positive experience being trans otherwise. 

As a disclaimer upfront, I am transmasculine nonbinary myself, and feel that I have a right to depict explorations of that experience in combination with binary ftm experiences. Also, this is NOT a story about detransitioning or “forced feminization,” do NOT get it fucking twisted or I will hunt you down. I will find you. This is about euphoria and dysphoria and happiness with one's body but clothing/presentation causing issues.

So for background, in my headcanons, I’m pretty convinced that Wild normally doesn’t experience dysphoria at all - something that very much separates him from Champion, whom is a very binary trans man. Wild woke up in a very masculine post-transition non-op body, Champion had been very satisfied with himself and his transition, having begun it as a teen with access to puberty blockers prior to hrt, so he never went through estrogen puberty. Wild is at first pretty bad at keeping track of and administering his hrt shots, something that Champion was very strict about and pretty much never failed to keep up with. At first, the other guard boys had to help him with them when he did remember because the anticipation of a shot is TERRIBLE for wanting to get it done when you have adhd and it’s something you don’t really think matters in your own personal upkeep. Eventually, Wild just kinda gives up on it with a happy shrug and carries on his merry way in his very androgynous body, transness usually being a fun afterthought for him. Even when he starts retaining fat differently, and growing breast tissue through lazy estrogen puberty, he’s having fun with this new experience! Heck yeah more gender fuckery, he’s having a great time being a man while doing it. Nobody in his life invalidates his gender over it. Period.

However.

There is an idea that I must credit to Stormy for sparking but has been making me lose my mind (/pos) over ever since, wherein at some point Wild goes to the mall with one of the other boys (possibly Hyrule, possibly Wars and Sky, never been able to figure that one out) to shop for higher end lingerie. (I see this fic as separate from and kinda irrelevant to the second puberty concept, so disregard that point for now and play with me in this space.) And he picks out some really cute finds! He's very happy with some lacy little numbers that he knows will go well with his eyes or whatever, but you know how they make lingerie that comes in pairs with bras that are equally as cute? Well, he goes to try one on, and standing there in the changing room, looking in the mirror, the world kinda stops.

There’s this overwhelming sense of badwrongbad while looking at himself in a bra. He doesn’t recognize the person in the mirror, he doesn’t like that person, and has no real way of articulating it to himself why.

Now, bear in mind, Wild very technically is a dissociative fugue state initially brought on by a severe concussion, which is a WHOLE OTHER can of worms I hope to explore one day. As thorough of a personality change there is though, he’s not as stable of an existence as I think he presents

So something about how he feels about seeing this sets off a dissociative panic attack that is probably the closest thing that he’s ever come to Champion surfacing into active memory, bearing some resemblance to the one in The Brave that was set off by Time playing the ocarina.

But is the bra too small? The wrong material? Who knows. Doesn’t matter. He’s suffocating. His skin itches like hell. He needs this thing off now.

Once he exits, the guys he’s with immediately notice a shift. He’s uncharacteristically serious for a beat or two, maybe even recognizable if he’s with the guard boys, but if he’s not nonverbally putting stuff on the reject rack, Wild laughs it off as nothing being wrong. Either Wild or someone else points out they can go get a smoothie after Wild decides he’s not buying any clothes, and his day gets a little better. The temperature of it maybe makes his nipples a little hard and Wild doesn’t know why he’s so aware and uncomfortable with that right now, but the others might also notice that he’s still periodically itching where the band and straps were until they get home.

By the time they leave the mall, he’s more or less fine and all of the Overwhelming Dread has passed. That night though, he puts a blanket over the mirror in his room. And when he curls up in bed, there’s this shuddering sigh that leaves him. That kind where you're just on the edge of crying but don't.

Anyway thanks for coming to my TED talk :) 

[ratfreecog]

fave newsie headcanons? Specifically Race Albert or Elmer bc they’re my faves

Oooh I love these three

RACE

I always imagine Race as the youngest brother between him Crutchie and Jack. That is just their vibe he’s at least two years younger than both of them and they are brothers (Which is a whole other thing I could talk about forever). Him and Albert are best friends, they’re close in age and both came to the lodging house around the same time so they just grew up together. I think they start living together when they age out of the lodging house, they’re just best friends and they need to be together.

I’m also a sucker for trans Race because I’m trans and projecting. Idk if you’ve read my newsies rewrite on ao3 but I basically treat it like my own canon and in that Race met Jack and Crutchie around age 4 already knowing he was a boy but not presenting that way because he’s 4, and then by the time the three of them go to the lodging house he passes pretty well so to all his friends he’s always been a boy, some don’t even know he’s trans.

Him and Albert are both ADHD, but Race is bouncing off the walls crazy ADHD and Albert is sit quietly in the corner counting ants ADHD. They are constantly trading stims and isms

ALBERT

Albert was jealous of Race for having two older siblings for awhile because he doesn’t have any siblings and he’s a bit jealous of the way Jack and Crutchie look out for Race, he doesn’t have anyone like that for him. Of course once Jack becomes leader he looks out for everyone, but it’s not quite the same. He gets over it mostly as they get older though, partially because Race always gets into more trouble than he does and needs people to look out for him more so he doesn’t Literally Die.

As kids, Albert was actually fairly chill but Race was a bad influence and as the two melded more and more their chaos grew and now Albert is almost as bad as Race is. Can you tell these two are inseparable in my mind.

This just came to me as I’m writing this but it’s so funny that now it’s canon but Albert actually isn’t his real name. He saw all the newsies with cool nicknames and went “I need one of those” but instead of picking a cool nickname he went with Albert. Neurodivergent kid behavior.

ELMER

Elmer is a bit younger than Race and Albert, maybe by a few years. Idk where the Elmer is a literal child hc came from but I see it everywhere and I like it so I’m going with it. He’s one of the few newsies who doesn’t actually live at the lodging house! He technically lives at the orphanage run by the nuns, but he spends most of his free time at the lodging house anyways since all his friends are there. I think when he gets older he moves there permanently, but he’s too young to figure that out yet.

He definitely thinks he’s older than he is. He hangs out with a lot of the older newsies (by older I mostly mean Race/Albert’s age more than say Jack’s) more than kids his own age. Because of that he gets treated like everyone’s little brother a lot, which annoys him a bit.

I could keep going with these honestly but I think this is already a pretty long post so I’m gonna stop there let me know if you want more!

[silveronc]

( SILVERONC ) : independent &. private &. selective roleplay blog for violet sorrengail from the empyrean series. novel canon based with headcanon influences. triggering &. mature themes present. faithfully transcribed from navarrian into the modern language by ghost. all events are true &. names have been preserved to honor the courage of those fallen. may their souls be commended to malek.

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disclaimer. this blog is not spoiler free.

temp info under the cut.

one. this blog will contain content not suitable for minors. anyone under the age of eighteen will be blocked on sight. i do not consent to the recreation, redistribution, or reposting of my writing. do not claim or translate my work on this or any other platform. it is not for public use.

two. if you’re not familiar or don’t know me, i’m GHOST: a queer 29 year old non binary asshole who uses they/them pronouns. i’m extremely adhd, autistic, and just super duper depressed. my activity is considered sparse / low at all times. speed is not a priority, nor am i a fast partner. the speed in which i reply to things is in no way a reflection of the thread, muse, partner, etc. but of my own limitations. i am extremely duplicate friendly. i won't follow others first out of respect for other writers unless i know they're okay with duplicates as well.

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[litterateur97]

Sorry you’re having a bad week! I hope you’re doing alright. I’m kinda shy so I don’t normally send in asks, but I wanted to ask if you’ve considered seeing My Hero Academia? The primary villain/deuteragonist of the story reminds me so much of Beyond Birthday it’s unreal, and there are characters who hearken toward Mello and Misa too, which is awesome. I think if you like any of those people you should give it a watch, it’s one of my comfort anime right now. Here are the characters (BB, Mello, and Misa):

Have you thought about L’s upbringing in Wammy’s House? What was his education like? Did he have any childhood friends? Were A and B his friends?

Who is your favorite anime character of all time?

Hi there, thank you for the ask! I understand being shy, I don't send people questions very often either lol.

1. So I actually have seen the first two seasons of My Hero Academia and I really liked it! I meant to continue watching it, but with my ADHD I often get sidetracked. I agree though that Bakugo is like Mello and Shigaraki is like BB. I don't think I've met the character who's like Misa yet, but she looks cool! I'll definitely have to get back to watching the series so I can see what happens next. So far Todoroki is my favorite character followed closely by Tsu. I find both of them relatable and I like their powers a lot.

2. I have thought about his upbringing a lot and I have several different headcanons for it. For the most part, I think L was mostly a loner and didn't interact with the other kids a ton. I think he had lessons with Roger and Wammy and then started educating himself on various stuff when he got his computer and got bored of what the old men taught him. I think he didn't have any close friends, or anything he would truly consider a real friendship, but got along alright with some of the other kids there. I imagine he would act polite to keep up appearances or to get what he wanted from the other kids. He probably mostly stuck to his room though. Wammy probably tried to encourage him to talk to the other kids until L started solving cases and he realized that was what L was most interested in. I think he probably got along with A and had a complicated relationship with B. He probably kept them at a distance because he doesn't like to get close to others, but still cared about both of them even if he didn't outwardly express that. Maybe they helped him with a few cases and he got to know them slightly better than the other kids at Wammy's, but he still probably wouldn't have labelled the relationships as friendships. Especially if he went on to make them his first successors, he probably tried to make them more like his colleagues.

3. My favorite anime character of all time is L. I have always found him to be incredibly fascinating and I relate to his character in multiple ways. I don't see a lot of autistic representation in the media that I view positively, but L was the first character I viewed as autistic that I loved the representation of. He was relatable and flawed and kind of the hero of the story while also kind of the villain of the story and there was so much mystery surrounding him that I could come up with whatever I wanted to give him a backstory. He sits weird like I do and loves sweets like I do and prefers to be by himself like I do and he's a badass. He's polite but also seen as a jerk, which is how folks often view me as well. I really looked up to him while also questioning a lot of his actions. I don't think any other character has come close to giving me all the feelings L does. I love him and I think he's a mess and I think he's capable of more and he gives me hope for myself. So yeah, he'll always be my favorite.

[stories-of-the-multiverse]

So... Darnell made me research his condition-

((So. I just started looking into migraines and chronic migraines, because up until now, I’ve only been Darnell’s migraines on my experience with migraines, but intensified, but.

Bruh, migraines can be worse than I fucking thought. Especially chronic migraines.

Apparently a symptom you can get from migraines is dizziness, nausea, and even vomiting.

Holy fucking shit-

Like, I had a headcanon that Darnell wasn’t in Pico Vs. Convict because his migraine was so bad that day, that he had to skip school, but jesus.

Bruh. I did not know migraines could be this bad, mine were always so fucking tame. Like. Mostly annoyances that at worst I had to go to bed for.

This could also go on to explain a few things about him.

For example, in Pico Vs. Uber Kids, their teach Mr. Flacit says the trio was chosen because after the shooting, the school’s best was dead, so they had to settle for those three. That is despite all three of them being above average intelligence. [This was measure by the outdated IQ method, but follow me on this.]

Now, while Pico is above average intelligence, Pico’s father is implied to be neglectful, and the lack of support from your parents can make your grades suffer.

Nene has “superior” intelligence, but she’s also go ADHD, and let’s be real, schools, especially back when the games were first made, aren’t exactly very... accommodating to neurodivergent children. Especially those with attention span issues. Plus. Anxiety and Depression. They are also bitches.

But Darnell... He has “gifted” intelligence. He’s smarter than both Pico and Nene. And I doubt this school was exactly for the best of the best, because. *wildly gestures at it* look at how badly it’s failed to even protect their students. Hell, some of the policies actively endangered the student body. Remember how the only school exit Pico could get to was chained and padlocked? To keep kids from leaving before school was over???

And as far as we can tell, from what little we know of his family, Darnell had a caring mother, and he’s not confirmed with any learning disabilities, or similar disorders that could make school difficult.

Except. For chronic migraines.

If the migraines were bad enough, it could have made focusing on school damn right impossible. If he could go at all.

[The trio did also experience some major trauma with the events of Pico’s School and Pico 2 at least at that point, and trauma can affect your grades, but I don’t think they took recent grades into account.]

And let’s be honest. Grades are a shitty way to determine a child’s intelligence.

And as for the poster that’s kind of a running joke-

While he still could be full of shit characterwise, If his migraines are bad enough to have him missing school, then it could either be a school rumor he took advantage of for his campaign, or he’s just fucking around based off of his condition.

Could the migraines themselves really be that bad, though? How bad are chronic migraines?

Chronic migraines are defined as at least fifteen head ache days a month, with full migraines at least eight of those days. And the pattern persists for at least three months. At least from I’m reading on ClevelandClinic.org.

According to Mayo Clinic there’s actually a lot of shit that can happen even before a migraine happens.

One or two days before, you can get symptoms like a stiff neck, food cravings, mood changes, constant yawning, aaaand bodily excrement issues I am not saying, thank you.

And then sometime before the migraine happens, or even during, some people get this thing called an aura which can last of to an hour. They’re usually visual disturbances, but can be other disturbances. They can be seeing spots of colors or shapes, outright vision loss, pins and needles feelings in the limbs, weakness or numbness in the face or a side of the body, or difficulty speaking.

The migraines themselves? They can last between four hours and three fucking days. And aside from terrible fucking headaches and nausea, they can make you more sensitive to light, sound, and even smells and fucking touch. Holy fuck.

And even after the migraines past, they can leave you drained. Like genuinely exhausted and even confused for a day.

Yeah. Basically they fucking suck.

What can cause them?

Well, general migraines, either stress, sensory stimuli, sleep changes, physical exertion, medication, food [salty processed food, aged cheese, and food additives, as well as skipping meals] and drinks [alcohol and caffeine], and even fucking weather changes. [For women, hormonal changes are also a factor.]

Chronic migraines though?

Again, medication, mood disorders [IE depression, anxiety, etc.], on going disrupted sleeping patterns, excessive caffeine intake, and physical and/or emotional trauma. I believe family history of the affliction is also a factor.

Now possible triggers for general migraines for Darnell?

Stress is a good one. Especially now a days.

Sensory stimuli? Considering he enjoys fucking with fire, light for sure. But I’d argue smell has to do with it too, considering fire accelerants? Probably smell. Not to mention what he makes his bombs out of. And spraypaint. Can’t forget spray paint. Sound probably works too, seeing as his FNF sprite has headphones. He could very well put those on to block out noise when the time calls.

Physical exertion? Especially now a days, yes.

We don’t know shit about his medicine intake or his eating or sleeping habits, so I can’t make comments on that.

As for what may have caused it to be chronic?

We don’t know much about his family, so we can’t say too much on that. Again, same with medication and sleeping habits.

I doubt his mom would have just given him coffee, maybe soda? Who knows.

There’s no confirmation or even indications in canon there’s anything up with him other than his pyromania. And that’s not a mood disorder. As far as I know.

Trauma, though?

Wellll... divorce is pretty traumatizing for a child. And it’s confirmed that his parents are divorced.

Probably not helped by the shit he has to deal with in like. Middle school.

Man. Research is fucking great. It gives you more ways to make your muses s u f f e r .))