#this world is so threatening but soothing
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I am currently dealing with my mother being in end care hospice for Alzheimer’s, dreading every time my phone makes a noise because it could be the worst news. I am spending my time either sobbing or a complete zombie with a barely functional brain. (I put a spray bottle in the freezer instead of the drink I was chilling). I live alone and have no close friends or family near me and I just wish I had an Elijah to hold me. I just wish I could lay on top of him in bed, him holding me and petting my hair while I cry.
I totally understand if this is not something you’re comfortable writing, but if you are, I’d really appreciate it. If nothing else, I thank you for reading my message.
Anchor
18+ ---- {Masterlist} {Tag-List}
{Elijah Mikaelson x Reader} Grief threatens to overwhelm you, but Elijah's calming presence becomes your anchor, reminding you that even in your darkest hours, you are not alone.
♡♡ I love you, anon, and I’m so incredibly sorry that you’re going through this. My heart aches for you, and I hope that this fic can offer you even the smallest moment of comfort. You are not alone, and I’m sending you so much love and strength~ ♡♡
672 words - Warnings: angst, grief, comfort & cuddles
When you are a child, your parents are this big, strong figure. They seem invincible and all-knowing. But then you grow up. And one day, you realize that your parents aren't superman. They aren't invincible and they certainly aren't infallible. Your parents, the same people who were your entire world as a kid, are suddenly human. And sometimes, humans get sick.
Everyone reacts differently, and there's no right or wrong way to feel. There's no road map or set of instructions on how to mourn. You can be angry, or sad, or numb, or all three at the same time. It's a roller coaster, a freefall, and you never know when the next wave of emotions will hit. It's okay to feel what you feel. It's okay to want to hide. And it's also okay to want to be with someone, to have someone to lean on.
You can't change the fact that your parents got sick, and you can't change the outcome. The limbo of losing them while they are still alive is a terrible feeling, like an emotional purgatory. All you can do is focus on yourself, and remember that the pain will pass, eventually.
It was one of those nights when the weight of the world felt unbearable, crushing your chest and making it hard to breathe. You sat curled up on your couch, terrified to look at your phone, waiting for a call you dreaded yet knew was inevitable.
You didn’t notice Elijah’s presence at first. It wasn’t unusual for him to move like a shadow, quiet and gentle, especially when he knew you were hurting. He stood in the doorway for a moment, his dark eyes full of concern, before approaching you with the kind of care only he could manage.
"My love," he said softly, his voice a soothing balm to your frayed nerves. He knelt in front of you, resting his hand on your knee. "You needn't face this alone."
His words broke something inside you. The dam of composure you tried so desperately to maintain crumbled, and the tears you’d been holding back poured out in waves. Elijah didn’t hesitate. He pulled you into his arms, holding you tightly as your sobs wracked your body.
He carried you to your bed, sitting with his back against the headboard and coaxing you to lay on top of him. His arms wrapped securely around you, one hand rubbing slow, soothing circles on your back while the other ran through your hair with a tenderness that brought fresh tears to your eyes.
"You’re allowed to grieve," he murmured against your temple. "You’re allowed to feel lost, to feel overwhelmed. But know that I am here. You do not have to carry this burden on your own."
You clung to him like a lifeline, your fingers curling into the fabric of his shirt as though letting go would send you spiraling into the abyss.
"I feel like I’m breaking, Elijah," you choked out. "I don’t know how to do this."
He kissed the top of your head, his lips lingering there for a moment. "You don’t have to be okay right now. You’re enduring something no one should have to endure alone. But you are stronger than you realize, and I will hold you through every moment of doubt and despair."
His words wrapped around you like a warm blanket, and though the pain didn’t vanish, the sharp edges dulled ever so slightly. His steady heartbeat beneath your ear became an anchor, a reminder that even in your darkest hours, you had someone who cared deeply for you.
As your breathing evened out and the tears subsided, Elijah continued to stroke your hair, whispering soft reassurances. His presence didn’t fix everything. It couldn’t. But it made the unbearable seem just a little more manageable.
For the first time in what felt like an eternity, you closed your eyes and let yourself rest, knowing that Elijah would be there, steadfast and unyielding, for as long as you needed him.
#elijah mikaelson#the originals#the vampire diaries#vampire diaries#tvdu#elijah mikaelson imagine#elijah mikealson imagine#elijah mikealson#elijah mikaelson x reader#elijah mikealson x reader#tvd#the vampire diaries x you#the vampire diaries x reader#the vampire diares imagine#the vampire diaries imagine#the originals imagine
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stay like this forever
pairing: dad!jaehyun x reader
w.c: 1.1k
genre - fluff. lots of it.
summary: you and jaehyun are preparing for and celebrating your son's fifth birthday.
note: this is my first time posting on here.. and it's probably not my best because i had to cook something up rq..
Both you and Jaehyun watched as the clock struck midnight, exchanging gentle smiles afterward.
It was officially your son’s fifth birthday, and both of you were feeling a whirlwind of emotions. How had it been five years already? You remembered the day as if it were yesterday—the fear, the excitement, and the pure joy all at once. You recalled how happy Jaehyun had been, the smile on his face when he held his son for the first time. His boy.
Tears filled your eyes as you thought about it. It took so much effort to bring a healthy baby boy into this world. It took even more work to build this perfect little family—two beautiful children with the best parents they could ever ask for. Your heart felt so full.
“Our baby is growing up on us, huh?” he chuckled, pulling you into a hug as he noticed the pout forming on your face. “He’s the best thing that ever happened to me. So is our baby girl.” He glanced at the baby monitor sitting on the coffee table, your daughter still sound asleep.
Jaehyun was in the middle of helping you decorate the living room and kitchen for your son to see when he woke up—a tradition that Jaehyun had shown you from his own childhood, and one you had grown to love.
“Doesn’t feel like that was five years ago. Look at my baby,” your voice shook as you looked at his birthday pictures over the years, scattered across the table. He had inherited his dad’s entire face. At first, you might have been a little jealous, but over time, you grew to love it, and so did Jaehyun.
“He’s handsome like his daddy,” Jaehyun replied, and you didn’t even need to look back to know he was smiling. You nudged his shoulder playfully, rolling your eyes as you wiped your tears, focusing on the task at hand—wrapping gifts in the colorful spiderman paper your son picked out days before.
He was a pretty simple kid for his age, asking for just a few toys and a Polaroid camera. But you and Jaehyun, being the parents you are, planned an entire day dedicated to him. After all, he deserved it. He was truly amazing.
Once you both finished decorating, you stepped back to admire your work.
“How many kids like Spider-Man these days?” you asked. It seemed like every kid did, but at least this year you could actually find decorations, unlike last year when Jaehyun went through hell and back to find cookie decorations to give your son the sugar cookie party he wanted. The thought made you giggle.
“I don’t know, probably all of them. Spider-Man is pretty cool,” Jaehyun replied with a warm smile, pulling you closer until your foreheads gently touched. The corners of your lips lifted into a smile that mirrored his joy.
“What’s with that look?” you asked, playfully teasing him as his dimples made their appearance, more prominent than usual.
With a tender grip, he took both of your hands in his and said, “Thank you for giving me the greatest gift of my life. He’s absolutely perfect, just like his mama.”
Your heart fluttered at the compliment, and a wave of emotion swelled within you, causing your bottom lip to quiver. “Dammit, Jae,” you whined, burying your face into his shoulder to hide the tears that threatened to spill. He chuckled softly, a sound that felt like a warm embrace, and pressed a gentle kiss to your head, rubbing your back in soothing circles.
“Let’s head to bed, ‘kay? You’re especially emotional tonight,” he suggested, a playful grin stretching across his face as he continued to rock you ever so slightly. “At this rate, your tears are going to fill up the whole room like Spongebob,” he joked, bursting into laughter at his own silly comparison.
“You’re so lame,” you replied with a laugh, playfully nudging his shoulder again before taking his hand and leading him up the stairs, shutting the lights off.
—-
The next morning, the sun's warm rays filtered through the curtains as you trailed behind Jaehyun into your son’s room, the camera clutched tightly in your hands. Jaehyun was balancing a beautifully decorated cupcake adorned with a flickering candle, a glimmer of excitement in his eyes. Birthdays were really his favorite days of the year, and it showed.
As he pulled open the blinds, the soft morning light flooded the room, gently rousing your son from his slumber. He rubbed his eyes groggily, mouth forming a confused little pout. When his gaze landed on the two of you, he squinted against the brightness, still trying to shake off the remnants of sleep.
You settled beside him on his bed, rubbing his back, while Jaehyun knelt down infront of him, holding the cupcake aloft.
As your son’s sleepy eyes widened in realization, a radiant smile spread across his face, lighting up the room like the sunshine itself. He instinctively covered his mouth with his small hands, his cheeks turning a warm shade of pink from the surprise.
You let Jaehyun take the lead as you both sang "Happy Birthday," giggling at your son’s shy reactions.
“Happy birthday, dear Sunjae! Happy birthday to you!” The excitement in your voices filled the room, and his face lit up even more. With a quick breath, he blew out the candle on his cupcake, his happiness shining through as he pulled you both into a tight hug.
In a playful tone, Jaehyun gently rubbed little Sunjae’s back and whispered, “Happy birthday, sweet boy.”
You leaned in and showered Sunjae with kisses on his cheeks, your heart bursting as his giggles filled the air like music. “We love you so much, little peach,” you said, your voice warm and full of love, soaking in this perfect moment together.
Sunjae started to squeal as his baby sister rushed in after hearing all the commotion. She dropped her stuffed bunny at the door and jumped onto the bed with him, pulling him into a tight hug.
“Happy birthday, Sunny!” she exclaimed, pushing you and Jaehyun aside as she squeezed her brother tighter. Their bodies rolled over on the bed, and they both burst out laughing.
“Aren’t you the sweetest girl ever?” Jaehyun asked, smiling at your two little ones.
“She gets it from you,” you replied, and the way he smiled at you said everything.
He was happy, you were happy, and your babies were happy. How lucky were you to share this moment with the person you love most and the two children you created together?
#jeong jaehyun#jaehyun x reader#nct fluff#jaehyun#jaehyun imagines#jaehyun oneshot#jaehyun drabbles#nct 127 x reader#nct 127 fluff#nct scenarios#jaehyun scenarios#kpop#nct 127 fic
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She Keeps His Shirt, He Keeps His Word
pairing: Frankie Morales x f! reader
This is the final part of the "Complete Mess" series readable here. But definitely also enjoyable as stand-alone.
summary: This is not the way it’s supposed to be, or the time it’s supposed to be. Everything seems wrong. Maybe they will find a way to make it right.
tags: explicit ! 18 + ,unplanned pregnancy, talking of abortion, arguing, angst (lots of it), smut, unprotected PiV, sprinkle of dirty talk, nicknames (hermosa, baby, mi amor, mi vida), inner turmoil, mention of addiction, some (possibly) childhood trauma, social class talk (kind of), did I mention angst?, idiots in love, breakup, established relationship, getting back together, slight pregnancy talk, brief mention of birth, all the feelings, love confessions, ALL THE ANGST, fluff (a tiny bit), soft Frankie, Frankie and his girl, angst and smut
notes: It's happening guys, my series "Complete Mess" is ending and we're finishing like we started with ALL THE ANGST. The title is part of a TS song, thanks to my bestie who suggested the title months ago. If you didn't read the other parts I highly recommend reading them first here and here !!!!
word count: 4,4 k (oops)
That’s not how it's supposed to be. This is not how you wanted this to happen.
It’s too soon, too much, not enough.
This should be one of the most important moments in your life, you should overflow with joy but instead you stare at the second line wishing it’d disappear.
Fucking fuck.
It’s been two weeks since your encounter with Frankie in the club, two weeks since you got back together.
Five days since your period should’ve started. You’ve taken three tests, all with the same outcome.
One unmistakingly has the word “Pregnant” on it. Pregnant, as in, a little life growing inside of your womb. It feels like a sick joke. A twisted turn of events.
You sink to the ground, the last test still in hand as tears start to blur your vision.
Your head feels like it’s spinning, the weight of it all threatening to crush you.
You feel numb, but at the same time you feel every emotion imaginable.
Anger, frustration, fear, sadness, all mixed up in a dangerous maelstrom of feelings.
You wanna scream, but you also wanna say nothing at all.
Your hands are shaking as you start to sob and the test hits the ground with a noise.
This is rock bottom, you think. You’ve hit the ground, both figuratively and literally.
How the hell could this happen?
How could you have been so careless ?
You’re almost 28. You should’ve known better.
You curl up in a ball, trying to soothe yourself but it’s to no use.
Your sobs shake your whole body and your head is so loud, screaming at you.
The chaos of voices inside you raging.
One voice is clear, overpowering all others. It’s repeating one simple thing, a name, one thing you can’t mistake for anything else.
Frankie.
You pull yourself together and frantically search for your phone.
You finally find it on the sink, the lockscreen of it like a punch to your gut.
It’s you and him, happy, in love, with not a care in the world. A fragment of happiness you both long for so much, but never be able to reach fully.
Tiny glimpses of it scattered through your mess of a relationship.
With still shaking hands you dial his number and he picks up on the third ring, your stomach dropping.
“We have to talk,” you simply state. “Can you come over?”
“Sure, hermosa. Everything alright?” The worry in his voice is palpable and you feel like you suffocate on the sob that leaves your throat.
“I don’t know… Just come here, okay ?”
“I’m on my way,” he says with conviction and the line goes dead.
Only twenty minutes later the front door opens. He’s let himself in with the spare key you gave him a while back.
His brows are furrowed in confusion, his dark eyes scanning the room for you in the dim light.
“I am here,” you say quietly, standing in your small kitchen with a glass of water in your hand.
“Baby?” he hesitantly asks as he steps closer to you. You don’t need to look up to feel his questioning eyes on you. “You scared the shit outta me on the phone… What is going on?”
Without saying a word you point towards the kitchen counter where the three pregnancy tests lie, offensively all spelling out the same result.
You don’t dare to look up. You’re not strong enough for whatever reaction he’s having.
You expect the same emotions you experienced just minutes ago.
But as Frankie stays threateningly silent, definitely uncharacteristic for him, you turn around to watch him look at the objects on the counter.
His dark brown eyes are analytical, searching and possibly confused.
His brows lift up high before he looks at you. His gaze flickering from your stomach to your face, gauging your own reaction before there’s a wide smile spreading over his face and it throws you off way more than any anger could.
Is he… happy?
“Is this real?” he asks and you scoff.
“I peed on three of these dumb sticks, so I’d say so.”
His smile only widens as he closes the distance between you and lifts you up, swirling you around like you weigh nothing as he exclaims, “We’re gonna have a baby!!” and his voice is so full of genuine joy it makes your stomach twist.
You wrap your arms around his neck but your energy definitely doesn't match his.
“Wait- You are.. Are you happy?”
“Of course I am happy! We’re having a baby, mi amor! This is probably the best thing that’s ever happened to me.” He takes a short breath and then adds, “Besides meeting you of course,” he laughs and the corners of your mouth twitch in the slightest hint of a smile.
You wish you could mirror his excitement.
But you can’t.
“Frankie, I–” You break off and pat his biceps to signal him to let you down again so he obliges and you take a small step back.
“I don’t know if… If I wanna keep it.”
His facial expression switches from joy to pure shock instantly, his eyes darkening.
“What?”
You suddenly feel so small under his intense gaze.
“What do you mean you don’t know if you wanna keep it?”
You can’t look at him so you focus your gaze on the wall, on the kitchen counter that serves as your breakfast table. Anything other than his face.
“I am not ready to be a mom,” you mumble.
“Nobody is ever really ready for this,” he objects and you sigh in response.
“You still struggle with the whole drug stuff…”
“I’ve been clean for weeks and you know that.”
“Yeah, but what if you relapse? Then what? I can’t take care of a newborn alone.”
He frowns heavily at this.
“You won’t have to do it all by yourself. I am here and I will be with you every step of the way.”
“Your job?”
“I’ll quit.”
“We’re already struggling to make ends meet as it is, Frankie. Now imagine a baby on top of that. All the diapers, clothing, furniture,…” you drift off, trying your best to reason with him.
He crosses his arms in front of his chest, his face hardening, taking on the defense.
“You’re just searching for reasons that this won’t work out. You’re not even considering it, are you?”
Ouch.
“Frankie, I–”
But he stops you by lifting his hand.
“Look, my parents were immigrants. We never had much but there was still nothing lacking, most of all there was love. Love, baby. That’s what created this new life in the first place…”
You scoff.
“You mean your childhood in poverty was worth it because of all the love? Love isn’t enough, Frankie. It doesn’t pay the bills and it doesn’t feed another mouth.”
He looks at you as if you hurt him. His sad soulful eyes make you regret your harsh words instantly.
“Besides,” you add, “I don’t know if you remember but I also come from a lower class family with a single mom. I remember vividly all the times I had to go to bed on an empty stomach. I don’t want this for a child. Nobody deserves that.”
His mouth opens but you interrupt him before he can speak up.
“And don’t tell me about how this formed you as a person, how it made you resilient. That’s romanticizing. I don’t want our child to experience the same shit.”
He runs a hand over his face in frustration.
“Fine. But you’re not alone in this. I am here and I will do anything to give you and the baby a good life.”
Your eyes narrow on him.
“Yeah? How’re you planning to do this? Taking another of these risky and highly illegal jobs?”
He frowns again.
“No, smart-ass, I will look for a steady job. One with decent pay.”
You snort sarcastically.
“Yeah, right. Because your criminal record is so clean!”
The moment the words leave your mouth you realize it was a low blow, even for you, but it’s too late to take it back now. He looks hurt, defeated and lost as he looks at you.
“Why did you tell me about this when you already decided to get rid of it?”
“I haven't decided yet. I just…"
You don’t even know how to finish the sentence.
He takes a few steps back, pacing around the kitchen, the gears visibly rattling in his head.
“What can I do to convince you to prove that I’m serious about changing?”
“Frankie, I know you’re trying.”
“Yes, I am trying. And I will try harder because I have a reason. A reason to do better.”
He’s sounding so sincere and confident that for a millisecond you dare to dream about the three of you as a family. Maybe a life in a little condo apartment. Or even something with a backyard, so the tiny human can have a sandbox to play in and their own puppy. But reality catches up faster than you’d like and you’re reminded why this won’t work out, no matter how much you want it to.
“Look, if things were different I’d be over the moon given the prospect of having a baby with you. Yet, in this life, you know as well as I do that the circumstances we’re in right now are far from ideal to start a family. We just got back together-”
“And?” “And, given our history it’s only a matter of time until we fight and break up again. You know how it goes.” “I would never leave you alone with a baby. You’re thinking that lowly of me ?”
You immediately shake your head no.
But Frankie already tenses up as the words begin to spill, every one of them more hurtful than the other.
“You’re thinking I am a lost cause, right? Doomed to repeat his own mistakes again and again and too dumb to learn a lesson for good. Is that it?” His voice is trembling with emotion and you feel like the biggest douche.
You open your mouth to say something, but Frankie interrupts you.
“You claim you love me, that you’re proud of me for even the small victories but still you treat me like a damn child, wrapping me in bubble wrap afraid I might implode first chance I get. But let me tell you, I am trying. I am working so hard to be a man deserving of your love. Showing up, going through withdrawal, even considering therapy and all you do is think of me as the big screw-up, worth less than the dirt under your shoe.”
You feel hot tears building in the corners of your eyes.
“Frankiiiieee…” you whine but he shakes his head, his expression hard and unapproachable.
The warmth in his eyes is gone.
“For you I’m just an idiot who’s in love with you but to me you’re all that matters, all I ever think about. The reason why I do all of this crap because hell, it’s fucking hard. But I constantly think about you, about your pretty smile and your soft words whenever I feel I am not strong enough. And now you’re standing here in front of me, telling me you’re pregnant with my child and you don’t wanna keep it because, still, after everything I’ve done I am not good enough, not worthy enough for you and it fucking hurts.”
You’re speechless for a moment, his monologue hitting you like a ton of bricks, taking your breath away so you just look at him, taking him in. His brokenness, his sadness and all you wanna do is to hug him, make this right. Do him right, like he deserves. But you can’t. Maybe the two of you were never meant to last anyway, maybe your fate was already sealed long before this moment in time. Your heart breaks the longer you look at him and you’re surer than ever of your decision.
You are both too broken to be parents. Too caught up in your own wreckages that calls itself life. You can’t bring a baby into this. A life whose survival depends solely on the two of you, each struggling themselves to stay afloat.
As your gaze finds his again, every emotion you’re feeling is mirrored in his eyes. You inhale sharply before you step towards him to wrap your arms tightly around his midsection and he holds you close, his face nuzzled in your hair, placing tiny soft kisses on your neck.
You’re equally searching for comfort in each other, even though you’re each other's reason for breaking in the first place.
“I am sorry,” you mumble, your voice muffled against the fabric of his shirt.
You feel him shaking his head, hugging you just a little bit tighter, his face in the crook of your neck. All your broken pieces squeezed together even if only for this moment.
You feel whole, you always do. His arms are your home and nothing beats the feeling of his body heat enveloping you and making you feel like maybe it’s all gonna be okay. His familiar scent fills your nostrils, so earthy and musky, so unmistakingly him, you’ll never tire of it. Sleeping in his worn shirts is the closest you have to tranquility when your mind is troubled yet again and you want to forget the woes of the world.
Eventually Frankie nuzzles his face against your ear, placing a feathery kiss against the sensitive spot behind it before his mouth wanders along the side of your neck and in a habit you tilt your head to give him better access, your hands finding his tousled locks which is always his weakness.
“Frankie…” you mewl, your voice already betraying you. “What are you doing?”
He smiles against the skin of your neck before he whispers hoarsely, “Let me have this. Please, hermosa…”
You shake your head but it’s a weak attempt at protest.
You could never say no to Frankie, no matter the circumstances.
The two of you attract each other like magnets. Never really complete without the other.
He gently pushes you towards the kitchen counter until the back of your legs are reaching the edge and you sweep the fucking test off the countertop before you hop onto it, not caring where they land. It’s not as if they would change anything now. His hands immediately find your hips as he stands between your legs and continues his assault on your neck. His mouth explores every bit of your skin taking his time before he helps you take off your shirt over your head and his mouth immediately latches back onto your skin, sponging hot open-mouthed kisses on your now exposed chest.
Your every nerve ending is already on fire at this point as you eagerly open the zipper of his jeans and pull it down so it hangs onto the back of his knees, quickly followed by his black boxer briefs. Your hand finds his hardened member, pumping him a few times to which he answers with a hiss at the mere feeling of your hand around him. You kiss him messily, swallowing his moan as you keep stroking him, his hips bucking into your hand.
One of his hands finds your hair, tangling in it to deepen the kiss, pulling your head back a bit and making you moan. The whole thing is a mess of tongues and teeth at this point and you don’t even remember the last time you were kissed like this.
“Take this off,” he commands as he tugs at your shorts and you lift your hips so he can pull them down, revealing nothing underneath.
His hand that was on your hip just moments ago finds your center, already wet and leaking for him and he hums in appreciation. “Always so ready for me,” he purrs as he sucks at your neck again, coaxing the neediest moan out of you as his hand simultaneously starts to explore your folds. His thumb on your clit drawing circles paired with the slightest bit of pressure before two of his digits sink into you and you gasp in response, your hand pulling at his shirt in a desperate attempt to hold onto something.
“Fucking beautiful,” he praises as his fingers curl inside of you and find the spot that makes you see stars instantly.
“Frankie, please,” you whimper frenziedly.
“I know, baby. I know,” as he places another, now way softer kiss on your neck, before he tilts your chin with his free hand and with the other guiding his cock towards your entrance.
“Look at me, I want to see you when I fuck you like this.”
His goddamn fucking filthy mouth.
You just nod and without another word he pushes into you, torturously slow at first, your eyes still locked and you feel like your whole body burns up with need.
You wrap your legs tightly around him as he’s bottoming out, giving you a moment to adjust to him, taking him as deep as you can.
He starts moving because you start wiggling impatiently, his hands on your hips as he pushes in and out of you.
This feels different, even if you can’t quite pinpoint why. It feels like a confession and a redemption at the same time. Like he knew all along how this would end.
You let your bodies talk and explain where words aren’t enough as your lips find his again, your hands slightly pulling at his hair as you keep kissing him like you’re drowning and he mirrors it perfectly. Without even noticing tears start streaming down your cheeks as he picks up the pace and fills you completely, satiating the void only he can fill.
As he notices the tears on your face he stills for a moment, his brown eyes full of worry.
“Are you okay?” he asks, brushing a strand of hair out of your face. “No,” you breathe and you’re not able to look him in the eye so you bury your face in his neck.
“Did I hurt you?”
You shake your head.
How can you explain to him that this feels like a goodbye?
“Don’t stop,” you whine, your voice thin.
You can feel his hesitation, his hand gently caressing the back of your head but you can’t look at him, you simply can’t or it will shatter you completely.
“Please. Frankie.” Are the only two words to make him nod and start moving again.
It doesn’t take long for the two of you to find your release and you would lie if it doesn’t feel like coming home, like this is supposed to be like this, two people connected in the simplest but also most powerful way. He pants against your collarbone, trying to take back some control over his breathing again. You just hold him tight, your hands caressing his back gently as you place a kiss on his hair, inhaling his scent.
But then something changes, the softness of the afterglow gone as he lifts his head, his dark brown eyes boring into yours.
“This is it, isn’t it?”
You frown, not exactly grabbing the magnitude of his question, but you nod as tears blur your vision once again. He shakes his head, lost for words himself as he puts his clothes back on and hands you your clothes as well.
The silence is heavy between you, so much to say but there are no words to pinpoint how you think or feel right now.
“I wish things were different,” you finally say quietly. “Yeah, me too,” he answers shortly, way too distant given the fact how close you two were mere moments ago.
“I am sorry.”
“That’s not enough,” he retorts, his voice hoarse.
You lower your gaze as you finally hop off the counter to put your bottoms back in their place.
He walks towards the front door, his steps heavy and you follow him mindlessly. You don’t want him to leave, but open the door for him, both of you standing in the doorway now. You look in his direction, but you don’t look at him, as he looks outside. There weren’t any clouds earlier but it has started to rain and it’s literally pouring now.
How fitting, you think to yourself.
His gaze shifts towards you again before he takes a step towards you, his big hand resting on your cheek, his thumb caressing it and makes you look at him for a long moment, really look at him.
Are you trying to memorize his features or is he trying to memorize yours, you wonder and try to give him a weak smile before leaning more into his touch and kissing his wrist.
“I love you, mi amor. I always will, no matter what.”
You take a shuddering breath before answering with a shaky voice, “I will always love you too, Frankie.”
You watch him leave, the rain soaking his clothing, drenching him completely in the time it takes him to reach his car, he takes one last glance towards your front door before you close it, sinking down on the linoleum floor and drowning in your own tears as the sky mirrors your agony.
—
Abortions aren’t glamorous and they aren’t easy.
The whole process is longer than you’ve thought it would be and all the questions are draining.
Is the father involved? Did you ever have an abortion before? When was your last period? Were you sexually active in the last four weeks? Did you have sex without contraceptive?
You grumble slightly to yourself while filling out the questionnaire. You didn’t tell anyone about this, because you were convinced you’re fine on your own.
But as your gaze drifts around the waiting area you see that almost everyone brought someone along and you feel more lonely than you ever did before.
Your leg impatiently bounces up and down and without giving much thought you cover your stomach with your palm, lowering your gaze and whisper, “No worries, little bean. We’ll be fine.”
As you look back up again you pray that no one heard you talking to yourself.
What the fuck was this? You talked to this little bundle of cells like it could hear you.
You clearly lost your mind, finally.
As you look back onto the paperwork again, your vision starts to blur and a single tear drops onto the paper. You’re caught off guard. Why are you so damn emotional all of a sudden?
In that instant you wish for one thing only.
Frankie being here with you.
He would hold your hand, caressing your back in soothing circles and tell you he’s here for you.
Shit.
You miss him more than you’d like to admit.
You fish your phone out of your pocket, your thumb hovering over his contact.
What are you even going to say?
“Hey Frankie, I sit at the abortion clinic and guess what, I am not so sure anymore. Did you know their heart starts beating at 6 weeks? A whole fucking heartbeat…”
“I know,” a familiar voice suddenly ringing in your ear.
“Frankie?” you ask back, still in disbelief that you really called him absentmindedly.
“Hey,” he chuckles softly through the speaker and your heart skips a beat.
“Hey yourself.. Sorry, that was… I don’t know what that was.”
“It’s alright,” he assures you, although you are pretty sure it isn’t but you can picture him smiling faintly.
“I sit here all alone filling out that damn questionnaire and I swear I never felt more alone than I do now and all I wished for was…” You can’t finish that sentence, because if you’d do, you’d give in. To him, to everything you desperately fought for to forget, trying to not feel anymore.
But the second you heard his voice it felt like all reason flew out the window. Your mind subconsciously decided for you.
“I wished you were here with me, holding my hand,” you press out of your lips, your voice nothing more than a whisper.
“You want me to accompany you?”
“No. Yes… Urgh, I don't know,” you stumble over your own words.
There’s a laugh at the other end.
“Make up your mind, hermosa.”
And in this very moment you do. You see clearer than you did in weeks.
Him kissing your baby bump, massaging your feet when they’re too swollen to walk on.
You painting the walls in the spare room, him admiring you and stating you’re glowing, even if you feel like a damn whale.
Him with your baby in his arms, rocking it gently, soothing it back to sleep and your heart hurts, it physically hurts to even think about it because you long for it, you crave this new life more than anything else.
“I did. I have,” you finally say. “We’re having a baby, Morales.”
—
9 months later you’re giving birth to a baby girl. The perfect mix of both of you. His dark brown curls crowning her tiny head and your bright eyes looking back at you.
Her first cry is powerful, announcing her arrival, taking her rightful space in this world and you never saw something as perfect as the baby that rests on your chest.
Frankie is a crying mess next to you full of pride as he kisses your hair.
“You did so good, mi vida,” he praises and his voice is nothing more than a muffled whisper against your hair before you start to cry yourself.
“She is beautiful,” you say in awe as you take her teeny tiny hand in yours, kissing it gently.
“Almost as beautiful as you are,” Frankie whispers, watching his two girls with nothing but tenderness.
You feel like you’re exploding with love, your heart suddenly living outside of your body and you swear to yourself no matter what, your daughter will have a good life.
One worth remembering. She’s the center of your universe now and as you tilt your head to Frankie you smile softly, leaning against him.
“We’re a family, Frankie,” you say as your voice chokes up with all the emotions.
“We always were, but now we’re parents too,” he answers and the weight of his words hangs heavy in the air. But you’re not afraid of the responsibility anymore.
You are happy, truly happy because for the first time in your life you feel like you’re exactly where and who you need to be.
my masterlist in case you’re hungry for more :)
#frankie morales#triple frontier#francisco morales#frankie catfish morales#fanfiction writer#berryfiction#frankie morales x you#frankie morales x reader#fem reader#triple frontier fanfiction#frankie morales fanfiction#smut#x reader#one shot#angst#angst with a happy ending#all the angst#pedro pascal characters
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Thief: The Dark Project
Down in the Bonehoard
#thief the dark project#thief#thief game#garrett thief#thief: the dark project#this world is so threatening but soothing#i wish i could put audio on that last gif#***
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Z
Another Ghost Dragon Prompt? Indeed.
The Ward had made a mistake. Had stolen something that had caused the very Skies to lash out, entire worlds at risk from their actions.
Time Itself shrieked in rage at the loss of Its child, or at least that's how every magic user- and the speedsters, pale and shaken and looking sick- had described it.
Someone had taken the young prince of the Infinite, and it was not the Tyrant King, long since sealed away, that lead the charge, but the Queen Regent that many had long since forgotten.
Many forgot that it was not the Dark who courted Time, but Time who courted the Dark. That It was just, if not more so, merciless as Its partner, and would Devour worlds should Its child- still with newdeath soft scales- was not returned.
Which meant that for the heroes, there was now a Clock ticking down ever so quietly. They had to take care of what was a government branch, had to deal with consequences of going over the law, or their World would End in dragon fire.
#ghosts are dragons#ghost prince danny#Lil Danny is about the size of a horse btw#Nocturne helps by helping CW enter Phantom's dreams to sooth the child#Is Danny technically a teenager? Yes. Is he still a small child to eternal primordial dragons? Also yes#Why yes the picture is in Danny's dreams#Clockwork is far larger than pictured#And yes CW knows how to wage war if he needs to he is married to Pariah & BIL with Fright Knight#Why yes Danny has the same swirled patterns as CW#The GIW's ecto-blocking equipment makes it impossible for them to find Danny themselves#Clockwork is Dannys Mom/Dad#And Danny is immune/invisible to Clockwork's future sight/vision so that's no help#If they can't find him they'll tear the world apart to do so#Clockwork is also threatening to wake his husband again because#he's not afraid to actually Join him in Conquering shit if it gets his BABY back#GIW do not realize that they're hearing boss music#Danny's friends & siblings Would join in but they've gotten kidnapped/bundled up into a nest from paranoid worry#All of amity has technically been stolen for their safety#< prev tags
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Cw: Nsfw (A bet with Simon about wearing a vibrator secretly and not to come in public)
A bet with Simon brought you to the predicament now. Squeezing through the crowded station’s concourse with his hand around you waist, looking like a normal couple, but no one knows there’s a remote controlled vibrator—designed to stimulate your g spot and have a little curve hooked snuggly against your clit—buzzing freely inside you.
Don’t come in 10 minutes, then you can do anything to him, his words ignited the competitive fire inside you.
The weather is cold, allow you to excuse your flush with it, hide your face in the scarf slightly when your moans sneak their way out.
“Only 3 minutes passed, sweetheart.” He leans down to murmur as he lead you across the concourse, the sultry tone disguised within, only able to get noticed by you. You shoot daggers back at him, try not to drop to your knees whenever someone accidentally bump into you in this packed station, making your thighs shifted in the force and the vibrator digs further into the sweet spot.
You meet his eyes behind his disposal mask and black cap, and you know the bastard is laughing at you from the crinkles at the corner of his eyes.
Your eyes are glossy with the tears from the constant stimulation, trying to threaten him with those bunny eyes but failed adorably. He can tell you’re teetering on the edge, and he’s been enjoying your fluster too much, his trousers straining behind the cover of his long coat. How can he not when you look absolutely cute like this, stopping between of your steps to forbear the orgasm, arms holding with his tighten and press your cheek against his bicep to stifle the whimpers.
You let out a sigh of relief when he dials down the intensity, look up at him with a hint of disbelief. The vibrations keeps sending shivers down your spine, your legs are doing their best to stay straight, but it’s much better than they were seconds before. So you give his hand a squeeze, resume the walk across the massive concourse.
The walk is torturous, every steps is worsening the divine ache between your legs. You didn’t like how the vibrator rutting into your sensitive clit, your panties isn’t soaked with all the juices and you’re not clenching that tight cunny under the onslaught of pleasure. You brainwash yourself repeatedly, the vibrations never cease, and you’re dancing on the edge even after Simon turned it down a few notches earlier. One minute left, just one minute…
Of course it won’t be that easy, he just wants to prolong your pleasure and get the show go on as long as it could, before finally breaking you.
Just as you two almost reach the main entrance of the station, you almost tripped when he abruptly changes the intensity once again. Covering your mouth and fully cling onto him, you’re totally speechless when he leads you to stand aside in the station, pulling you into his arms and coos lowly.
“Come for me, love, let it out.” His hand patting soothingly when you bury your face into his chest, muffling all the cries as you get pushed over the edge, gushing in your panties and you know it’s definitely ruined by now.
A few people spare a glance at your way, curious about what just happened before going on their life. Yet you’re totally unaware of it, trying to quiet your whines and you keep tucking yourself in his arms.
Simon adjusted his coat, enough to engulf you in it, and he keeps crooning sweet nothings into your ears “You’re so beautiful, so gorgeous when you came in my arms, love.” His voice soothing you along with his palm rubbing on your back, hiding you in his coat and shield you from the world, even though he’s the one bringing you the luscious torment.
Supported by his strong hands so you won’t fall to the ground with wobbly feet, you lift your head from his chest after your breaths slows down, and you manage not to punch him in the face when pat your head and remind you the truth.
“9 minutes 47 seconds, you didn’t make it to 10 minutes. what a shame.” Simon’s chest rumbles with the quiet laughters. You see the mischief in his rich brown eyes, and hell, he’s definitely thinking about how he will get you to do from losing the bet.
#ghost x reader#ghost x you#simon riley x reader#simon riley smut#simon ghost x reader#simon ghost x you#simon riley x you#simon ghost riley x reader#cod x reader#simon ghost riley x you#cod x you#female reader#nighttimealone
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I Only Bleed For Him
dragon!sylus x fem!reader
summary: amidst the blooming flowers in tarus city, the dragon claims his beloved.
cw: nsfw (18+) - mdni!!, smut, a smidge of fluff, angst, kissing, loss of virginity, oral sex, p in v, possessive sex, blood, claiming bites, mating, knotting, soulmates, canon compliant death
wc: 4.5k
a/n: the way the myth cards just keep getting depressing :( there will be another chapter after this fic, but it'll be in the actual timeline! also not very confident in my angst writing abilities, but hopefully y'all enjoy!! <3
also on ao3!
“You know, Tarus City can have flowers bloom everywhere, as far as the eye can see. But only for one person.”
Sylus’ voice is a soft murmur, his hands caressing your waist as he holds you tighter against him. Your heart lurches uncomfortably, fingers brushing across his cheek and the hard, black scale that lays fused to his skin.
“What if we stayed here?” you whisper, peering into his crimson eyes.
“Would you be able to sate yourself?” Sylus asks in return, his claws brushing through your hair gently.
You avert your gaze, cheek pressing against his chest as you stare at the swaying carmine flowers in the soft breeze. Sylus’ heart is steady, the soothing sound of thrumming coupled with the motions of his claws nearly enough to lull you to sleep.
His question holds value. Revenge threatens to pull you apart at the seams, the desire for chaos rearing its ugly head. You want more, you always want more and Sylus gives it to you willingly. Your selfish desires will be the downfall of the Fiend, you think, hands tightening into fists.
Yet, there is so much more to do. So much to take from those that had taken from you. Resentment makes you tremble, the Sacred Judicator’s words ringing clear in your mind.
The Sorceress has been judged.
You could laugh at the thought if you weren’t so angry. Some sorceress you were, powerless and yet put before the Court of Justitia as a traitor for trying to protect the statue of a dragon.
Angry tears prick at your eyes, teeth gritting together only to be drawn out of your wrathful thoughts by the press of Sylus’ lips against your clenched fists, his claws unfurling your clenched fingers.
“Just like the day we met,” Sylus murmurs, his gaze trained on you, “such hatred and defiance.”
You swallow the lump in your throat when he kisses your palms.
“Beauty,” he whispers against your skin, “and resentment, little sorceress. They make you my precious, most finest treasure.”
“I don’t want to think about the Legion,” you reply, voice trembling, “I want them gone, Sylus.”
“Pluck them out one by one,” Sylus says, his hand caressing your cheek, “but another will replace those gone. Their roots run deep, weeds that refuse to die, marring the world around them.”
You sigh, eyes fluttering shut as you lean into the warmth of his hand, the rough scales scratching your skin gently.
“I shall burn Justitia to the ground,” you grit out, eyes burning with determination, “I will make them all regret and spite them into contrition, bring them to their knees and- and-”
Sylus laughs, his expression soft as he peers up at you. “You speak sharply, little sorceress. Your fire and spirit matches my own.”
“Because I am your other half,” you mumble, pouting slightly as you feel your anger subside the more Sylus caresses you.
“You are,” Sylus affirms, “bearer of my soul, my other half. Only you could be worthy enough.”
A light flush covers your cheeks before you hide again, nosing into his cheek. You can feel the warmth of his soul inside of you as your eyes shut, lungs expanding as you suck in a deep breath, the scent of the dragon clouding your senses.
Burnt embers and a soft sweetness make you whine, body squirming as you try and press yourself closer to him, your fingers caressing his horns.
“Careful,” Sylus grunts, his claws tightening around your waist when he feels the brush of your fingers against the base of his horns.
You can feel the slight jump of his hips, your gaze lifting to find his brows drawn together, eyes squeezed shut.
“Does it hurt?” you ask worriedly, fingers pausing.
“Hardly,” he replies, his eyes opening again, “I am simply… sensitive.”
You hum, head tilting to kiss his cheek as your fingers resume their stroking and caressing. Sylus makes a small noise and you relish in it, peppering kisses here and there, across his cheeks and over the large scales.
A delighted sound escapes you when you hear what you think is something akin to a purr. Sylus’ cheeks tint with a light pink and you smile against his cheek, ears straining to listen again when he rumbles gently, his head tilting as he pushes up into the caress of your hand.
“Like a mountain cat,” you tease, tracing the slope of his nose when he purrs again, feeling his claws twitch against your hips.
“Do not use my gifts against me,” Sylus grouses, despite the pleased rumble of his chest.
“I enjoyed them,” you reply, fingers running through his hair leisurely, “if only we could go back.”
“We will,” Sylus promises, his eyes flickering open, “I shall make sure of it.”
You smile wistfully. Going back to the cavern held more challenges than worth risking. Bitterness makes your smile waver, but you brush the thought away, content to at least be given this moment of reprieve.
“We will,” you repeat after him.
Neither of you mention the emptiness of the promise. The damp coldness of the chapel latches onto you and Sylus is the only one able to make it dissipate, his claws tracing over the curve of your cheek.
You cling to him, nose brushing against his gently.
“I love you.”
Sylus’ chest rumbles in response, his head tilting as he presses his lips to yours. The curl of his tail around you holds you to him, his hands kneading at your hips as you kiss him. It’s slow and syrupy, both of your souls intertwining and interlocking in the sweet musk of the flower fields.
You can feel the pull of your soul towards him, how your body yearns for more of him, the tendrils of your very being try to claw through gaps of your ribs and pierce his chest. You’d let him hold you in the glowing stone embedded in his chest if it were possible.
“So this is what it means to love,” Sylus murmurs, his lips brushing over yours with every word he speaks, “perhaps mortals are wiser than I thought.”
You laugh, arms wrapping around his neck when he rolls you both over, your back pressing into the soft grass.
“Only some mortals,” you correct, smiling when his teeth bite onto the tips of your gloves, pulling them free from your hands, rings and all.
Sylus’ skin is warm when you touch him again, truly for the first time. His eyes flutter shut, savouring the sensation of your skin against his before he lowers his head, kissing you again.
“I wish to claim you, my beloved,” he breathes out, trailing hot kisses down your neck, “will you let me?”
“Yes,” you sigh, your own eyes slipping shut, “yes, Sylus.”
Sylus’ tail sways behind him, the pointed tip brushing across the skin of your leg before his claws join the midst, dragging down your thighs gently. You gasp, the unfamiliar sensation making you squirm as he begins to undo your dress.
You help him, sitting up as he pulls it over your head, his claws ripping through the delicate fabric despite his tentativeness. You don’t pay it any mind, cupping his cheeks to pull him down into a slow kiss, feeling his body hover over you, his tail wrapping around your waist.
The sharp spikes dig into your skin, making your body seize with discomfort until the repeated brush of Sylus’ lips over yours soothes away the nervousness.
Your panties are ripped away too, the fabric laying in tatters in Sylus’ palm. He frowns when he stares at his claws, and you reach for his hand, lips pressing against his knuckles gently.
“It doesn’t bother me,” you whisper.
“It should,” Sylus murmurs, his gaze dipping as he stares at you laying bare before him.
He can see the mark of his fangs in your neck, the subtle scent of your blood setting his senses alight. You belong here, Sylus thinks, his eyes darkening as he sees the rise and fall of your chest, the pebbling of your nipples in the cooling breeze.
An undying flame blooming amidst a field of lesser flowers.
If only he could keep you here.
The flicker of emotion in Sylus’ eyes makes you uncomfortable and you kiss his knuckles again, lips pressing against the hard scales firmly. He sighs, his hand flexing in your grip, his tail drawing you closer as he kisses your forehead.
You can hear his breath hitch when you fumble with his trousers, undoing the various buckles to have him bare before you as you are before him.
“Greedy mortal,” he murmurs, gripping your chin to plant a kiss to your lips.
“You already knew that,” you smile faintly, nipping his lower lip playfully.
Sylus rumbles, his body shifting to remove his clothing. You swallow when you see the heavy hang of his thick cock. The tip glistens and you squeeze your thighs shut, trying to quell the dull ache that has settled inside of you.
“It- it is different from mortal men,” you mumble, head tilting curiously as you stare at the base of his cock.
“I am a dragon,” Sylus supplies drily, his hand wrapping around his cock.
You watch, mesmerised as he pumps his cock with his clawed hand, brows furrowing when you see the slight swell at the base of his cock, above his heavy balls.
“A knot,” he explains, moving his cock to show you the swell of it a little better, a low hiss leaving him when you reach out to touch it hesitantly. “It- hah- it is useful for mating.”
It gives a little under your prodding, wetness pooling between your thighs at the sight of it. You try to wrap your fingers around it, but the tips of your fingers hardly touch, Sylus letting out a growl at the sight.
“I want it,” you whisper, blinking up at him, “I- I want you to mate me, and- and I want that.” You point to his knot.
Sylus lets out a hoarse laugh, his clawed hand coming up to caress your cheek.
“And you shall have it when I claim you. Although…” he pauses for a moment, his expression becoming slightly flustered, “I have never claimed anyone before.”
“Oh,” you flush with him, averting your gaze. “I have never been claimed before.”
Sylus sucks in a sharp breath, his nose nudging against yours gently as he plants a soft kiss to your lips. “My first and my last.”
You have to blink away the tears that begin to brim in your eyes, your arms wrapping around his neck tightly. Sylus kisses the side of your head, his body descending further down your body.
Soft noises leave you as he places reverent kisses along the length of your body, his tongue flicking at your nipple experimentally, carmine eyes peering up to watch your reaction carefully. When you gasp, Sylus hums, his mouth opening wider to envelop your breast with his mouth.
Your fingers delve into his soft hair, back arching as you push your breast further into his mouth, his hot saliva making your skin shine. The flowers around you sway, unbothered by the act of intimacy, Sylus’ clawed fingers pinching at your nipple lightly.
He groans when you jerk under him, mouthing at the sides of your breast, pressing wet kisses here and there, tongue swirling over your areolas before granting each nipple a soft kiss.
“You respond well, beloved,” Sylus whispers, beginning to lave over one of your areolas again, seemingly taken with the way you twitch whenever his teeth graze your nipples.
“It- it feels good,” you whine, your thighs sticky with slick.
“Then perhaps I ought to do the same here,” he murmurs thoughtfully, pulling back to pry apart your thighs.
Translucent strings of slick cling to your thighs and the folds of your pussy, Sylus’ head lowering to get a better look.
“So delicate, little sorceress,” he whispers, his claws pulling apart your puffy folds to find your glistening pussy. “A bud,” Sylus continues, the flat of his scaled finger brushing your swollen clit tentatively, “like a flower.”
A needy whimper escapes you, hips bucking up under his exploratory touch. It’s nothing like when you used to touch yourself in the privacy of your small room within the walls of Justitia. Sylus’ touch is rough, textured, heightening the feeling that makes your clit pulse with want.
“Please,” you beg breathily, fingers reaching out to grasp his horns, “please, I- I need more.”
“But I am not yet done,” Sylus replies, peering up at you to watch the expression on your face when he rubs your clit more firmly.
“Sylus!” you whine, “the ache is too much!”
The dragon between your thighs huffs out an amused breath, the hot air making you shiver.
“So demanding,” he sighs, leaning forward to kiss your clit. “Although I do enjoy seeing you so… uninhibited, beloved.”
You push his head towards your cunt, growing impatient, although being careful not to jostle his horns too much. Sylus groans when he tastes you for the first time, his rough tongue gliding through your wet folds.
A gasp leaves you when he flicks his tongue against your clit, a tremor settling through your bones as you writhe atop the grass. Sylus holds you in place, a pleased purr sounding as he nuzzles deeper into the wetness of your cunt, his tongue lapping and laving over the velvety flesh of your pussy.
“Oh,” you breathe out, eyes squeezing shut when you feel the dig of his claws into your flesh, coupled with his mouth on your pussy, “S- Sylus, oh yes.”
Sylus hums into your cunt, his tongue swirling around your clit, collecting your slick into his mouth, drinking it down as if it were the very essence of your soul.
“You taste sweet, my little love,” Sylus rasps, his claws pulling apart your folds so he can prod at your aching hole, feeling the needy clench of it around his tongue when he presses it in. “Sweeter than any wine I have ever tasted.”
“You- nghh- you exaggerate,” you mewl, tugging at his hair gently, your fingers stroking the base of his horns.
Sylus shudders, his head tipping forward into your touch. “I do not,” he growls, nipping at your thigh in a show of disagreement. “I would keep you on my mouth every night if you allowed me and drive you mad with pleasure.”
You smile hazily when you hear his words, hips rolling up to meet his mouth when he sucks your clit into his mouth, his tongue stroking across the swollen bud lazily.
“Are we not already mad?”
“Perhaps we are,” Sylus responds, his hips grinding into the clothes beneath him. “But I should be glad to be mad with you.”
A soft, content sigh leaves you as you lose yourself in the sensation of his tongue. It swirls through your folds, presses into your cunt every so often whenever Sylus loses interest in your clit for a brief moment.
He never strays far however, his chest rumbling with his own contentedness as he buries his face deeper into your cunt, breathing in your scent. Sylus sucks at your clit with renewed fervor when he feels the tensing of your thighs against his claws.
“I can feel you, little love,” Sylus rasps, his voice low and rumbling. “Come undone on my tongue.” He presses an affectionate kiss to your clit before latching his mouth onto it more firmly.
“Sy- Sylus,” you whimper, legs beginning to jerk as the pleasure grows.
He growls into your pussy, his mouth working faster, tongue swirling and slurping until you have no choice but to cum. You cry out, his name leaving you in disjointed syllables, heavy pants breaking your cries.
Your thighs squeeze around his head, until his tail wraps around one of your legs, pulling you open so he can drink from you until sated. Overstimulation makes you sensitive, whimpers and whines leaving you as you pull at his horns.
“It is too much,” you mewl, “I- I cannot-”
“You can,” Sylus murmurs, spreading you open wider, exposing you completely, “you will for me.”
The dragon devours you again, his fangs sinking deep into the flesh of your thigh. Your blood and slick mixes together and Sylus feels as though he is being torn apart from within, your taste heating his own blood until he can no longer hold back.
You cum again on his tongue, back arching before you writhe violently, fingers grasping for anything and everything, uprooting the flowers nearby as you attempt to gain some semblance of stability.
Sylus gives you some reprieve, his tongue lapping over your puffy pussy gently, his lips pressing against your clit and the mark his teeth have left on your inner thigh.
He rises up to find you limp, unable to stop the shudders that jerk through your body from the immense pleasure.
“Little love?” he murmurs, a claw tapping against your cheek.
A pout makes your lips jut out when you blink up at him blearily, brows furrowing into a glare. Sylus smiles, his head dipping to brush a sweet kiss to your cheek.
“You are beautiful,” Sylus says, his hand stroking over your hair soothingly, claws running through your hair.
“I want to do the same,” you whisper, your hand reaching down between your bodies to find his cock. “I want you in my mouth.”
It’s harder than before, pre-cum smeared across the tip, warm globs dripping onto your stomach. You wrap your hand around him, squirming around in an attempt to get onto your knees.
“Another time,” Sylus murmurs, stopping you from getting closer to his cock, his tongue licking into your mouth.
“Now,” you demand, blinking up at him, still a little dazed. “Now, Sylus.”
“Another time,” Sylus repeats firmly, his lips descending upon yours again.
“There- there will be no other time!” you protest, peering up at him desperately, your lower lip trembling.
You only speak the truth, and it angers you. The cruelty of fate has begun to wrap its remorseless fingers around your heart, squeezing and squeezing until you feel your heart give, clenching painfully.
“Never say that!” Sylus snaps suddenly, his hands cupping your cheeks. He presses himself against you, forehead touching yours. “There will-” there’s a tremor in his voice, “there will be another time. Always.”
How many more lies will you both tell yourselves?
You bite back the sob building in your throat, crushing the sense of helplessness by pulling Sylus closer and pressing your lips against his feverishly.
The dragon grips you harder, his tail winding around you tightly, holding you to him as he returns your kisses.
“Take me,” you beg when he lays you down again, “Sylus, claim me, please.”
“I will,” he hushes your cries with a kiss, “I will, little love. You will be by my side till the end of time.”
Sylus grasps his cock, breathing heavily, your panting breaths mixing together. He notches his cock against your drenched cunt, pushing in slowly. You both share a moan, his face pressing into the crook of your neck. The scales dig into your skin, his claws digging into your hips deeper, pain flaring across your skin.
It’s enough to distract you from the rampant thoughts of loss however, your mind clouding with every inch of Sylus’ cock that sinks into you.
“So- so tight,” he grunts out, his hips moving slowly.
You can feel his knot, slipping in and out of you, tugging on the edges of your cunt every now and again with how swollen it’s become. His cock splits you open, your soft moans sounding into the vast flower field as you reach up, hugging him to you.
Sylus thinks you sound as sweet as the scent of the blooming flowers.
He lowers his body, his weight almost crushing you but you need this, need him as close as possible to convince yourself that this is happening.
“More,” you whimper, pressing sloppy kisses to his jaw, “ruin me, take me apart.”
“You- hah-” Sylus’ eyes squeeze shut when he feels the tight clench of your cunt around his cock, “you mustn’t say such things.”
“And yet,” you whimper, dazed eyes finding his, “and yet, oh- I desire- ngh- it desperately.”
“If that is what you wish,” he whispers, kissing your forehead gently.
You moan loudly, the wanton sounds mixing with his low groans and growls when he swirls his hips, cock pressing into you deeper. His heavy balls slap against your ass, both of you uncaring of the lewd sounds as he thrusts his hips in and out of you, cock driving in deep.
Sylus’ knot sinks into place with each deep, rolling thrust he gives you, popping out whenever he draws his hips back. You’re slurring, hardly able to see him properly, clinging to him, legs wrapping around his waist.
He grunts, shifting your legs higher, away from the sharp, spiked scales that line his tails.
They say the dragon is dangerous, the epitome of sin and yet he cares for you dearly, his lips trailing across your skin with such reverence that makes your body ache.
“You are mine,” Sylus growls, his carmine eyes glowing as he peers down at you. “Every inch of you, half of your soul, it is all mine.”
“Yours!” you hiccup, the pleasure making you feel numb, “always yours!”
Sylus moans deeply, and your hazy eyes catch the frantic sway of his tail behind him, his hips snapping harder and faster, your pussy struggling to accommodate and keep up with the ever-swelling knot at the base of his cock.
The sheer feral nature that seems to take over your dragon has you whining, a sharp scream leaving you when you feel his fangs bite into the still healing wound on your neck.
Blood flows freely from the bite and Sylus growls at the taste, losing his grip before tightening again. His claws prick at your thighs and hips, drawing more blood until it’s smeared across your skin. Your skin is just as red as the flowers in the field.
Your nails rake down his back, feeling driven wild by pain and ecstasy. Your own teeth sink into his shoulder, a soft whimper escaping you.
“Bite,” Sylus rasps, his hand on the back of your head, urging your teeth to sink in deeper, “harder, little love, harder.”
And you do bite. You mewl as you sink your teeth into the flesh of his shoulder, his blood wetting your tongue and lips and the taste is intoxicating. Your mind swirls as you feel the harsh thrust of his cock bullying inside of you over and over again, tongue lapping at the marks your teeth have left on his shoulder.
You can taste his blood and you can feel the searing pain and you- this- this is real.
This is real. This is real. This is real.
Your mind chants the affirmation as you tell it to yourself firmly, biting harder into him as your nails dig into his shoulders.
“Take it, beloved,” Sylus whispers hoarsely, pressing his face back into the crook of your neck, “take my cock and my knot. Let me claim you.”
“W- wait,” you begin to gasp, eyes widening with panic when Sylus manages to bully his cock into your pussy enough, the knot catching finally.
You squeak, unable to comprehend the feeling of being plugged up so full. It’s entirely too swollen to pop free, your poor pussy fluttering around the thickness of it. Sylus isn’t faring much better, his hips jerking and halting when he feels the clench of your cunt, and how his knot has practically held you both in place.
“Yes,” he snarls, low and throaty, his hips swaying a little to grind his cock into you. “Mine, finally mine, little love.”
The press of his scaled claw against your clit has you screaming again, his name leaving you hoarsely as you cum on his knot. Your orgasm is violent, the tight coil in your lower stomach snapping sharply as you come apart, thighs twitching and body shaking.
Sylus sinks his fangs into your neck again and you cry out, softer this time, holding him to your neck and letting him lap at your blood.
He shudders, the taste of your blood coupled with the feel of your fluttering walls around his knot making his cock jerk and balls clench. Sylus cums with a throaty roar, his claws landing on either side of you as he hunches over.
Pleasure racks through his body whilst hot, thick cum floods your pussy unable to leak out and instead held in place by his throbbing knot. You whimper, mind feeling syrupy when Sylus rumbles and purrs, nuzzling into your breasts and then your cheeks, another hot load of cum spilling into you when his cock kicks at the squeeze of your cunt.
You kiss him clumsily, motions clouded by the haze of intimacy. Sylus sighs into your mouth, stroking your hair gently. You both lay there, surrounded by flowers, panting and unwinding.
His knot deflates after several minutes, softening cock pulling free. His cum spills out of you and Sylus watches with a frown, wishing his cum would stay stuffed inside of you.
Sylus rolls off of you when you tap his shoulder, his tail curling around you to bring to lay atop him. You don’t say anything, face pressing into the crook of his neck.
“Your desires are cruel,” you whisper, feeling his arms tighten around you.
“As are yours, little love,” Sylus says softly.
You sniffle, pressing a kiss to the steady beat of his pulse just under his jaw before shifting to kiss the glowing stone embedded in his chest.
Sylus shudders, his claws flexing around your skin. You kiss the stone again, beginning to cry when the stone’s glow begins to dim.
There’s a strange chill that makes your skin crawl, the familiar scent of the chapel invading your lungs.
“No,” you sob, peering up at Sylus, “not yet, please, please!”
Sylus smiles down at you, his expression forlorn. “I love you,” he says quietly, brushing a kiss to your forehead, sitting up to pull you onto his lap.
“I need more time,” you whisper, kissing him despite the growing coldness in the air. “We need more time.”
Hope had made you both fools. Sylus had claimed you in a withering graveyard.
You’re weeping when you ask him the question.
“Will you make the flowers bloom for me, Sylus?”
Your dragon kisses you fiercely.
“Always.”
Sylus’ emboldened oath is the only memory your fingers can latch onto when the dank atmosphere of the chapel awakens you.
The bell of the chapel rings loudly and you sob, scrabbling at his shoulders, trying to pull Sylus closer. You scream when the Sacred Judicator tears you from Sylus, the pull of his soul tugging violently at your chest.
A week later, the dragon’s curse rings true.
You no longer feel the warmth of his soul, for your beloved is dead.
#sylus smut#sylus#sylus x reader#love and deepspace#love and deespace sylus#lnd sylus#lnd smut#sylus qin#sylus angst
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"It wasn’t until about two years into the pandemic, when the “vax and relax” era was clearly not going to work, that I had to reckon with my system for organizing time. I couldn’t delay the future any longer; I couldn’t continue protecting the story of my life from the pandemic’s incursion. So I accepted the terrible fact that the pandemic was going to continue indefinitely and was not merely an event in my life but rather the container in which the rest of my life would take place. This was a difficult reckoning. It required that I come to terms with a great deal of grief about the failures of those around me; about what I lost and will have lost; a privilege in thinking that these were the sorts of world-historical changes that happened to other people, at other times. But it was also a reckoning that rescued the orderliness of time, for me. It was as if the clock was un-paused, and life resumed its forward march. I think most people stabilized their warped sense of time by other means. Instead of accepting that the pandemic continued on, that we failed to contain it and so would need to incorporate its ongoing reality into the stories we tell ourselves about our own lives, they instead transformed the fantasy of after into their reality. After the pandemic, after the lockdowns, after our world ruptured. They were able to interrupt the prolonged uncertainty that the pandemic had brought to all of our lives by erecting a finish line just in time for them to run through it. And as they ran through it, celebrating the fictional end of an arduous journey, they simultaneously invented a new before. This is the invention of memory. The Pandemic became something temporally contained, its crisp boundaries providing a psychic safeguard to any lingering anxieties around the vulnerability and interdependence of our bodies that only a virus could show us. No longer did it threaten to erupt in their everyday lives, forcing cancellations and illnesses and deaths. It was, officially, part of The Past. And from the safety of hindsight (even if only an illusion), people began telling and re-telling the story of The Pandemic in ways that strayed from how it all actually went down. It was a way to use memory as self-soothing."
--Emily Dupree, The invention of Memory
#pandemic#covid#covid 19#covid isn't over#covid conscious#time#memory#grief#collective memory#collective trauma#pandemic grief
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ੈ♡˳ imagine playing with logans hair. gn!reader
he’d kill you, actually kill you if you told anyone how he practically purred the moment your nails met his scalp. he’s sprawled out on the bed between your legs, head heavy on your tummy as his eyes flutter shut.
you want to tease him, but refrain. you’re not sure you’ve ever seen him this content, his dark, delicate eyelashes fluttering against his cheeks as he fights the inevitable pull of sleep that threatens to take him. there’s something so peaceful in that moment, watching the man you love melting so easily under your touch after so long of him skittering away like a wounded animal.
“you falling asleep?” you whisper, unable to contain yourself. he’d insisted prior he wasn’t tired.
a low, firm grumble against your skin, “no.”
but logan is a terrible liar, his body grows heavier as you tenderly trace your fingers through his hair, relishing in the way his smooth locks dance through your digits. and though he’d never say, he craves this kind of contact frequently. he’s all too accustomed to violence, clenched fists, raising hackles and spilling blood. he longs for tender touches, love so warm it makes him ache, stolen kisses. . . and you.
he just wants you.
maybe that’s why he finds it so easy to lower those fortified walls in your presence, because you allow him to be soft. you allow him to be everything he is never allowed to be. the world has taken so very much from him, but it’s also given him you.
so how can he be mad at it for long?
you push back the tufts of hair lining his forehead to reveal more of his face, a smile curling as you see his lips parted, breathing softly in the calming rhythm of sleep. he nestles closer instinctively, thick arms around your thighs as he’s pulled deeper and deeper into slumber. no nightmares will find him here.
not while your company serves to soothe his ever-racing mind, bringing it to a halt with every kiss, every simple touch. you curl your fingers around a strand of his hair and smile, wondering how he let you get this close. but you won't question it, you already know how lucky you are.
when he wakes, logan insists he did not fall asleep and was merely resting his eyes. all said while wiping drool from his scruffy chin. you swear you can see a flush on his cheeks as he huffs and rises from the bed.
you’d say his one weakness is that he falls asleep like a kitty cat the moment your nails touch his scalp, but logan would say his one weakness is simply you.
day 22 'hair' prompt for logantober <3
#my writing#wolverine x reader#logan howlett x reader#logan howlett smut#wolverine fanfiction#the wolverine#wolverine#logan howlett x y/n#logan howlett#deadpool#deadpool and wolverine#james howlett#deadpool 3#deadpool movie#james logan howlett#x men#xmen fanfiction#x men movies#marvel x reader#marvel#mcu#marvel cinematic universe#marvel comics#marvel mcu#hugh jackman#logan promptober#logan promptober 2024#logan howlett fluff#wolverine x you#logan howlett fic
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Safe
~900 words
Gotham is dangerous. You know that. The whole world knows that. But that doesn't mean your job lets you go home before sunset. You didn't intend to be out so late, but your coworker had an emergency, and of course, no one else could come in. So, great, now you're walking Gothams streets when you should be warm in bed. At least your boss promised you overtime.
You're pulled from your thoughts at the sound of heavy footsteps behind you. It makes you tense, your fingers curl tighter around the pepper spray in your pocket. A quick glance in the window you pass revels a bulky, disgruntled, stumbling group of figures following you. Your throat tightens, and you walk a little quicker. You should have called Jason. Why didn't you call Jason? Usually, he walks you home if your shift is this late. Because it's a short walk. Because you can handle yourself, and he's busy, and you weren't supposed to be out tonight. You remind yourself, cursing silently. This is fine. You can handle yourself.
You count them as you pass the next window. One quickly turns into two. Then three. And then, your heart skips a beat as a fourth figure turns the corner in front of you. Okay, change of plans, cross the street and enter whatever rundown 24/7 shop is open.
That plan is quickly derailed when they start shouting at you, threatening you. Your steps slow, fear pooling in your gut as your mind races to find a way out of this situation. Your fingers slip against your phone, weighing calling GCPD.
Faster than you can process, a hand grabs your arm and tugs you into the alley, causing a strangled noise to leave your throat.
"Move." A heavily modulated voice. Rough leather gloves. A lingering gunpowder smell. Jason. No, not completely– He's Red Hood right now. A towering, intimidating mass of heavy weaponry and unyielding armor.
"C'mon." He pushes you along quickly, a steady hand guiding you by the small of your back into a shadowed hiding place in the alley.
You don't quite manage words, but the relief spreading through your body nearly brings tears to your eyes.
Jason crowds you against the wall, cool, sturdy armor, a shield between you and the dim light of the street. He tilts his head towards the entrance of the alley, listening as rough, slurring voices call for you. But they don't come closer, agitated by the loss of what seemed like easy prey and eventually fade. His helmet tips down to focus on you.
"Are you hurt?"
You shake your head, unable to form the words just yet.
He nods, slowly taking stock of you. "You're out late." The words coming out half questioning, half accusing but so, very gentle.
"Work– someone called out. No one else could take the shift."
"You should have called." He says evenly, voice softening as he takes in your shaky tone. He dips his head to rest his face place against your shoulder, and you're not quite sure who's more relieved that he's here.
"I know. I'm sorry. I should have listened." You say quickly, knowing full well what could have happened, what he sees every night when he spends his nights protecting Gothams streets. He always tells you to call if you need anything, but the idea of bothering him while he was saving lives? You couldn't bring yourself to dial his number.
"You did listen," he replies, soothing and silencing your worries as he nuzzles into your neck again. "That's what makes you so special. You listen to me. You follow my lead, right into safety. I don't even have to say anything and you trust me. You just do it. You're perfect."
Jason pauses for a moment and pulls back to trace his thumb over your jaw.
"You know that?"
His words send your heart into flutters and you hope, that even with his focus on you, always on you, he doesn't see the goosebumps forming under his touch.
"Shouldn't you, you know, go after them?" You ask after a moment, careful to change the topic from yourself.
He hums softly. "Batgirl's already on it. I'm walking you home."
"You don't have to do–" You start, gulit settling in your chest.
"I do. I want to. Let me?" He runs his thumb over your cheek, slow and almost reverent. The leather slides over your skin, the gesture so familiar it might as well be indented into your skin. You don't have it in you to read into what it means. But it soothes the guilt nonetheless.
You nod once, relenting. How could you deny him? It makes him smile beneath the helmet how easily you agree to him. For both your sakes, he needs to see you home safe.
He hesitates, glowing eyes of his mask studying you. He carefully steps out of the tiny hiding place he shielded you in, and if the adrenaline wasn't fading from your system, maybe you would have noticed the reluctance seeped into his movements. He offers you his hand.
You take it without a second thought.
He squeezes your fingers once and begins to guide you home. Gotham is still dangerous, dark and cold.
But Jason's there. And there's nowhere safer for you than with him.
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MY PEACE | MV1
an: this was a request from a lovely first time requester ( @pinkinternetstarlight )i had so much fun with this except i probably went about this differently than was expected maybe? i don’t know but i hope everyone enjoys it
wc: 1.9k
THE MONACO SKYLINE GLITTERED outside the floor-to-ceiling windows of Max’s apartment, but the man inside couldn’t see it. Not really. He was slumped on the sofa, his head buried in his hands, elbows resting on his knees, still dressed in the sweat-soaked polo and race trousers he hadn’t bothered to peel off since getting home. The hollow thrum of the media circus still echoed in his ears—reporters’ voices, headlines dissecting every moment of his race, every mistake, every edge of aggression they couldn’t wait to sharpen into a weapon.
The living room was dim, the only light a faint glow from the kitchen where she stood, stacking plates from his barely-touched dinner into the dishwasher. He hadn’t asked her to come over; he never had to. She just… knew. She always knew.
She moved with quiet purpose, tying her hair back with a loose band, sleeves rolled up as she made her way around his space—tidying up the chaos he left in his wake. To anyone else, it might have seemed like she was cleaning for the sake of it, but he recognised it for what it was: her way of looking after him, of making sure that when the noise of the world threatened to cave him in, the corners of his life she touched felt a little less sharp.
He glanced up when she wandered back into the room, her bare feet soft against the wooden floor, carrying a folded blanket. She sat beside him without a word, the way she always did, close enough that her shoulder brushed his. Without asking, she unfolded the blanket and draped it over his lap, tucking it in just so.
His breath hitched—he didn’t mean it to, but there it was, like a crack in a dam he spent his whole life patching up. He turned his head slightly, enough to catch the faint scent of her perfume, and for the first time all day, the ache behind his ribs quietened.
“You don’t have to do this,” he murmured, his voice hoarse.
She turned to him, one corner of her mouth lifting in a small, knowing smile. “I know I don’t.”
He let his head fall back, tipping to the side until it came to rest against her lap. His body felt too heavy to hold up anymore, but here—here was lightness. Her fingers slid through his hair, slow and deliberate, untangling the knots the day had left behind.
The monster inside him, the one he kept chained under the weight of the world’s expectations, fell silent.
“Dinner’s in the fridge for tomorrow,” she said softly. “And I’ll stay the night if you want.”
He shut his eyes. He wanted to say he didn’t deserve this—didn’t deserve her—but the words wouldn’t come. All he managed was a nod, and when she leaned back against the cushions, her hands still in his hair, he let himself breathe.
The silence between them stretched on, but it wasn’t heavy. It was soft, the kind that let him loosen the grip on his thoughts, if only a little. He stared at the darkened skyline, the city lights casting faint patterns on the walls, and tried not to get lost in his head. But it was a losing battle. It always was.
The thought crept in before he could stop it. You don’t deserve this. You don’t deserve her.
The words sounded like his own, but the voice behind them wasn’t. It was his father’s, sharp and clipped, laced with that same cold disdain that had haunted his childhood. His dad had always seen her as a weakness, a threat to his focus and discipline. How many times had he warned Max about letting anyone get too close? About “wasting energy” on things that didn’t matter?
And yet, here she was, the only person who’d stayed. The only one who’d made it through the wreckage of his life without turning away.
Her hand was still in his hair, her fingers slow and soothing, but he could feel the faint shift of her breathing as she glanced at the clock on the wall.
“Max,” she said softly, her voice cutting through the noise in his head. “You’ve got a flight tomorrow morning. You should shower and get some sleep.”
He opened his eyes, the weight of the day still pressing down on him, and turned to look at her. “I’ll sleep on the plane,” he mumbled, though he didn’t move.
“Shower first,” she said, firm but kind. “You’ll feel better.”
He didn’t argue. He never could, not with her. With a quiet sigh, he sat up, the blanket slipping to the floor, and dragged himself to his feet. The thought of standing under hot water—letting it wash away the grease and grime and whatever else the day had left on him—wasn’t as bad as he let on.
By the time he stepped into the shower, he could hear her moving about in the kitchen again. He let the water beat against his skin, his hands braced against the tiled wall as the heat loosened the tension in his shoulders. Still, his mind wouldn’t stop replaying the same loop: his dad’s voice, the doubt, the sense of never being enough.
When he finally emerged, towel slung around his waist, the smell of something warm and sweet drifted through the apartment. He found her in the bedroom, already curled up against the pillows, a mug of hot chocolate in her hands. On the bedside table sat another mug—tea, the way she always made it for him, a perfect balance of strong and soothing.
She didn’t look up as he walked in, her nose buried in a book, the soft glow of the bedside lamp making the room feel impossibly safe.
He took the mug and sat on the other side of the bed, cradling it in his hands as the steam curled up around his face. For a while, they didn’t speak. She kept reading, and he let himself lean back against the headboard, the warmth of the tea spreading through him.
It wasn’t until he was ready—until the words that had been choking him all day finally loosened—that he spoke.
“They hate me,” he said quietly, his voice barely more than a rasp.
She looked up from her book, closing it without a hint of impatience, and turned her full attention to him. “Who?”
“Everyone,” he said. “The media. The fans. Hell, even Checo, sometimes.” He laughed bitterly. “They don’t even know me, but they’ve already decided I’m the villain. And the worst part is… I think they’re right.”
Her brows knitted together, and she set her mug down on the table. “Max,” she said, her voice steady, her gaze unflinching, “you’re not a villain.”
He shook his head, staring into his tea. “I don’t know how you can say that. You’ve seen it—how I am on the track, how I am off it. I push people away, I—” He stopped, the words catching in his throat.
“You’re human,” she said simply. “You’re not perfect, but no one is. And everything they say about you? That’s noise. It’s not who you are.”
His hands tightened around the mug, and he looked at her, his expression raw, like he was seeing her for the first time.
“You don’t have to stay, you know,” he said, his voice breaking. “You could’ve left a long time ago. Sometimes I think you should’ve.”
She held his gaze, her eyes calm but fierce. “And sometimes I think you forget that I get to make my own choices,” she said softly. “I’m here because I want to be, Max. Not because I feel sorry for you. Not because you owe me anything. Just because you’re you.”
The weight in his chest shifted, just a fraction, but enough. He didn’t know how to respond to that—not yet—but when she picked up her book again, leaning against his shoulder as if nothing had changed, he let himself close his eyes and breathe.
For tonight, it was enough.
The tea was long forgotten on the bedside table, the room quiet save for the faint rustle of her turning a page and the soft hum of the city beyond the windows. Max shifted under the duvet, his body still heavy with exhaustion, but the ache behind his ribs had eased, just enough to let him breathe.
She lay beside him, her book propped against her knees, the light from the lamp catching the soft curve of her face. He watched her out of the corner of his eye, trying to ignore the pang of something sharp and unfamiliar blooming in his chest. It wasn’t the first time he’d felt it, but tonight it seemed impossible to ignore.
He adjusted his pillow and turned on his side, facing her. “You’re going to read all night, aren’t you?” he asked, his voice low, teasing.
She glanced at him, a small smile tugging at her lips. “Not if you need to sleep.”
“I always need sleep is what you say, no?.”
She laughed softly, her head tipping to the side as she closed her book, slipping it onto the nightstand. “Alright, I’m done.” She reached over and turned off the lamp, plunging the room into comfortable darkness.
He shifted closer instinctively, the warmth of her presence drawing him in. They’d done this a hundred times before—falling asleep in the same bed, his arm slung over her waist or her head tucked against his chest—but tonight felt different. The space between them was charged with something unspoken, a tension he didn’t have the courage to name.
She settled into the pillows, her back facing him, and he hesitated for a moment before closing the distance. His arm slid around her waist, pulling her closer, and she melted into him without a second thought.
“Goodnight, Max,” she murmured, her voice soft and drowsy.
He rested his chin lightly against the top of her head, inhaling the familiar scent of her shampoo. “Goodnight,” he said, though his mind was far from quiet.
The weight of the day, the weight of everything, seemed to dissipate as he held her. She didn’t demand anything of him, didn’t ask him to explain himself or prove that he was more than what the world saw. She just… was. And somehow, that was enough to quiet the storm inside him.
His eyes fluttered shut, the warmth of her body lulling him into something close to peace. And before he could stop himself, the words slipped out, barely more than a whisper, lost to the dark.
“I love you.”
She didn’t stir. Didn’t react.
For a moment, panic flared in his chest—what if she’d heard him? What if she didn’t feel the same? But as her breathing deepened, slow and steady in the quiet of the room, he realised she was already asleep.
Relief swept over him, and he tightened his hold on her just a fraction, burying his face in her hair. It was better this way, he told himself. She didn’t need to know. He didn’t need to ruin what they had, didn’t need to drag her into the mess of his life any more than she already was.
For tonight, it was enough to hold her. To let the monster in him fall silent, just for a little while.
And as sleep finally pulled him under, he couldn’t help but hope—just a little—that maybe someday, he’d find the courage to say it again.
the end.
taglist: @alexisquinnlee-bc @carlossainzapologist @oikarma @obxstiles @verstappenf1lecccc @hzstry8 @dying-inside-but-its-classy @anamiad00msday @linnygirl09 @mastermindbaby
#f1#f1 imagine#f1 fanfic#formula one x reader#f1 x reader#formula 1#formula one#formula one x you#formula one imagine#f1 one shot#red bull f1#max verstappen x reader#max verstappen fic#max verstappen imagine#max verstappen fanfic#max verstappen angst#max verstappen fluff#max verstappen x you#max verstappen#mv1 one shot#mv1 x you#mv1 fic#mv1 imagine#mv1 x reader#mv33#mv1#red bull team#red bull racing
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dog tags [l.h]
Pairing: Logan Howlett x fem!reader Word Count: 800 words Warnings: Smut (18+). Unprotected Sex. Little dialogue. A/N: Here's a little drabble I've been thinking about since I saw Deadpool & Wolverine. It's my first attempt at writing in like a whole year. Please go easy on me. Dedicated to @eupheme for inspiring me to write again.
You love these moments, so few and far between. When the world melts away, and it’s just you and Logan. Sharing space. Sharing love.
That gentle, sinful dance. The slick slide of skin. Dewey breaths and twin moans. The quiet squeak of the bed frame, keeping time with Logan’s deep thrusts.
He’s wrapped himself completely around you, pressing his entire weight onto your body. It’s like he’s trying to burrow his way into you. Leave the imprint of himself upon your very soul. You’re trapped between the soft mattress and his solid body, completely vulnerable to him. As he is to you. Baring his soul before you. Letting you take what you want as he willingly offers you everything he has.
“Fuck, sweetheart,” Logan groans into your ear. His teeth brush the shell, sending shivers down your spine.
You thread your fingers in the damp hair at the nape of his neck. Tugging those strands when he thrusts deeper, finding that mind-numbing spot. “Feel so good, baby.”
He shudders at the praise. Shoulders tightening in determination. To make you feel good. To unravel you.
Logan’s nose bumps yours clumsily as he presses a sloppy kiss to your lips. Filthy and sweet. His tongue slides into your open mouth, greedily tasting the saccharine moans that leave your throat. He fills you with his own pleasured noises. Deep and tangy. Bourbon and honey. Aged to perfection for a special occasion as this.
Your hands slide the length of his broad shoulders, tangling in the metal chain that dangles from his neck. You pull him impossibly closer, fusing your bodies. He surges over you like a wave, pulling you deeper and deeper into the riptide of your pleasure.
Logan hitches your leg around his hips and swallows your cry of his name. When your head tips back, overwhelmed by the heady sensation building within you, he watches. Watches the slack of your jaw, your kiss-swollen lips forming the letters of silent pleas. Watches the furrow of your brow, that flash of desperation in your eyes.
Logan brushes his thumb over the swell of your lips. Your teeth catch the pad of it, tongue swirling out to soothe the sting.
He groans, half-lidded eyes drooping more. The languid rock of his hips jerking for a moment. That knot in his stomach threatening to come loose. But he knows you're close to that edge. Can hear it in those sweet high-pitched moans, feel it in the needy undulations of your hips as you seek release. He won’t come yet, not without you.
Logan draws his thumb from your mouth and fits it into the space where your bodies meet. You gasp at the slick pressure against your clit. The expert circles he presses pushing you further, driving you higher. His free hand grabs yours, pressing your palm into the pillow.
The sweet gesture, the connection adds to the intensity of the feelings swirling around you. For the longest time sex with Logan was primal, desire-based. The only goal was getting to the end, that blissful orgasm. Not that you minded, you had needs to. But lately…well things had changed. Tender touches replaced bruising force. Fiery, biting kisses turned languid. Still intense, just different.
“Gonna make me cum, Logan,” you whisper, eyes still locked on his. “‘M close.”
“I know,” he says.
The thumb on your clit picks up speed and the heat in your belly grows. Logan crowds your space, bending you nearly in half. The movement has his dog tags dangling in your face, bumping against your chin with every forward thrust.
A wicked thought fills your head. The desire fogging your brain. On his next forward push, you suck the tags into your mouth. The effect is two-fold. The cool metal on your tongue tastes of sweat. It keeps your mouth busy and forces Logan to remain close.
You can feel his breath on your face, hear that warped groan, for a split second before he’s kissing you. Cool metal mixing with the uninhibited warmth of desire.
It pushes you over the edge. You come with a choke groan, and Logan’s not far behind you. He kisses your chin, forehead falling against yours as he empties himself inside you.
The afterglow has always been your favorite. Your body limp and floating through the syrupy sensation of pleasure. Senses dialed up to ten as you slowly come down. Logan lies limp on top of you, fighting to regain control of his breathing. He’ll never admit this, but he’s a cuddler. Seeking that warmth, the connection that’s eluded him for so long. Softness he’s never allowed himself to have. Softness he doesn’t think he deserves.
You were the first to offer it to him in such a long time, and he’s long since stopped running from it. Maybe that’s why he keeps coming back. Giving you little pieces of himself each time.
#logan howlett x reader#logan howlett smut#logan howlett#wolverine x reader#the woverine#james logan howlett#rion writes
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“Believing in love”
Sylus x fem! reader
Synopsis: Amidst the dazzling lights of a futuristic city, you confront your fears of love
Genre/warnings: Angst with a Happy Ending, soft sylus, reader who doesn't believe in the concept of love, emotional trauma, vulnerability, discussions of betrayal, past trauma for reader, sylus just wants to love you for you and nothing else, hurt/Comfort, emotional healing, small fluff, slow burn, hints of trust issues
Note: okaaayyyyyyy I went overboard this was originally going to be a short imagine ..like maybe five hundred words or less with the concept: “I don't believe in love” and “I'll show you what it can be” – I wasn't planning on this to be a full fledged one shot…but hey …I ain't gonna complain any further my brain is just doing its job ✨️
w.c: 1.8K
The city hums beneath you, a symphony of noise and light, but your mind is far from the chaos below. You keep your gaze fixed on the skyline, as if it holds the answers you can’t seem to find. Beside you, Sylus’ breath is ragged, his desperation barely concealed as he clings to your wrist. You can feel the tremble in his fingers despite the firmness of his grip, as though he’s trying to hold you together—or perhaps, to keep you from drifting away.
“Why do you always attempt to leave me? What is it that I’m doing wrong?” His voice is soft, almost pleading, a rare break in his usually stoic demeanor. He’s searching your face for something—anything—but you remain still, letting the weight of his words hang in the air.
He clutches you tighter, not forcefully, but in a way that tells you he’s afraid you might vanish into the night, just like the countless times before. The emptiness in your silence gnaws at him, but you can’t bring yourself to say anything.
“Sweetheart…” His voice cracks, the word nearly lost in the wind. “I’m not one to beg, but if it means I’ll get an answer from you, then I’ll lower myself.”
You glance down as you hear the rustle of fabric, your eyes catching the sight of Sylus sinking to one knee. A proud man, reduced to pleading. The weight of his devotion presses down on you, suffocating in ways you hadn’t expected.
“I wish for an answer. Any answer from you.”
But still, you say nothing. The flood of emotions you’ve buried for so long stirs within you, threatening to overwhelm. The city lights blur in your vision, turning into a kaleidoscope of glowing orbs, and suddenly, your throat tightens. You want to speak, but the words are tangled in your chest, caught in the rising tide of emotion.
“It’s… it’s not that I wish to ignore everything you’ve done,” you start, your voice shaky and weak, barely audible over the rushing wind. “It doesn’t mean I hate you, or that you're not trying hard enough. I care for you. I do.”
Your breath hitches, your heart pounding against your ribs, as tears, hot and unrelenting, streak down your face.
“I want to love you, Sylus. I want to be near you every day, to feel what it means to love someone, to truly understand it. But I…” Your voice cracks, the word foreign on your tongue. Your chest tightens, the familiar sting of betrayal flashing in your mind, the memories you’ve fought so hard to suppress now rushing back in vivid detail.
Before you can break down any further, Sylus pulls you close, his arms wrapping around you like a shield from the world. His warmth seeps into you, steadying you amidst the storm inside.
“Shhh… it’s alright. Come here.”
His voice is soothing, and for a moment, you let yourself relax in his hold. You breathe out slowly, though each exhale feels labored. Your chest rises and falls as you try to calm the sobs threatening to tear through you. His hands gently cradle your face as he wipes the tears away with the pad of his thumb, his touch delicate but firm, as if assuring you he won’t let go.
“I’m scared…” Your words spill out between quiet gasps, your chest heaving as you finally let out the weight you’ve carried for so long. “I’m so scared, Sylus. I’ve loved before, countless times… and neither time was it ever given back.”
Sylus' embrace tightens, his chin resting atop your head as he rocks you gently. His voice, though calm, carries a raw edge of determination, as though he’s willing his words into reality.
“I can show you what it can be,” he whispers against your ear. “I’ll show you what love should feel like, what it should be… No one in this entire city is more deserving of that than you.”
His hand rests against your back, moving in slow, soothing circles.
“I just need you to believe in me. let me show you that I can give you the love you’ve been searching for.”
You close your eyes, the weight of his words settling into your chest, pushing against the wall you’ve built around your heart. For a moment, there’s only the sound of your breathing, the quiet murmur of the city below, and the cold wind that carries the scent of the night sky. Moonlight bathes the two of you, casting silver across the rooftop as if the world has stilled for this one moment.
And though the fear still lingers at the edges of your mind, something shifts within you. Perhaps it’s the warmth of his touch, or the sincerity in his voice. But for the first time, you allow yourself to believe in the possibility.
Yet he keeps himself steady, his grip tightens—not out of force, but from desperation, as if he’s holding on to more than just your body. He’s holding on to the very idea of you, of the two of you.
“I don’t need you to say you love me, not now, not in this hour, not tomorrow” he murmurs into your hair. “I just need you to trust that I will. That I already do.”
His words pierce through the walls you’ve spent so long building. The fortress around your heart cracks, letting in the first tendrils of warmth you’ve felt in ages. You try to push him away, afraid of being vulnerable, but his hold remains firm—not possessive, just secure. Safe.
“But Sylus—” you whisper between breaths, your voice breaking.
“I’m not like you. I don’t know how to—how to do this. Every time… I let someone in, they ripped pieces out of me until there was nothing left to give...so, even if you say you love me… what can I give you..when there's nothing? ”
He pulls back slightly, just enough to meet your gaze. His red eyes soften, the intensity that so often burned with dominance now a smoldering ember of understanding.
“You think there’s nothing left to give,” he murmurs, “but every broken piece of you is still yours to offer. And I’ll take them, even if they don’t fit together perfectly. I don’t care if you feel shattered. I’ll hold onto every fragment until you’re ready to trust me with the rest.”
Your chest heaves as you fight for control over your emotions, but the more you resist, the harder it becomes. Sylus’s steady gaze undoes you. How could someone like him—so powerful, so untouchable—look at you as if you were the most fragile thing in the universe?
“ — and yet there will be days you think I don’t know fear?” he continues, his voice low, barely above a whisper. “You think I don’t wonder every day if I’m enough for you? That I’ll lose you before you ever truly belonged to me?”
The vulnerability in his words makes you flinch. You’ve seen Sylus command entire fleets, face enemies without a trace of fear, and yet here he is, baring himself before you. It’s too much—too raw. But it’s also exactly what you needed to hear.
“I’m not a perfect man, and I won’t pretend I am," he adds. "But I will never stop trying for you. Not for a second or an hour or a day of my life"
His thumb brushes the last of your tears away, and for a moment, all that exists is the sound of the wind whipping around you, the lights of the city flickering beneath your feet, and the quiet hum of your hearts—one racing, the other steady.
You finally exhale, the weight of your emotions loosening its grip just enough for you to speak again.
“What if I’m broken?” you choke out. “What if there’s nothing left that is untouched for you to love?”
Sylus’s lips quirk into a sad but tender smile.
“It doesn't matter if any part of you is left …untouched ” he says softly. “When I mean I would love ..you ..I mean you .. Every part of you…that I have fallen in love with”
His words settle into you like a balm, soothing wounds you didn’t realize were still bleeding. You’ve spent so long believing that love was something to fear, something that would eventually turn on you and leave you empty. But Sylus is showing you a different kind of love—one that doesn’t demand perfection but offers patience. One that doesn’t expect you to be whole but promises to stay, even when you’re not.
Your body, tense and guarded for so long, begins to relax in his arms. You close your eyes and lean into him fully for the first time, allowing yourself to be held—not because you’re weak, but because, for once, you don’t have to be strong.
You stay like that for what feels like hours, wrapped up in each other as the city continues its ceaseless rhythm below. The cold air bites at your skin, but neither of you care. Not when the warmth of Sylus’s embrace keeps the rest of the world at bay.
Eventually, you speak again, your voice quieter, more vulnerable than before.
“I don’t know how to let go” you admit.
Sylus shifts slightly, enough to look into your eyes again.
“And, you don’t have to,” he replies. “I’m not asking you to forget anything that has happened to you then or anything that has happened to you in the months or years away. I just wish for you to allow me to be part of your future.”
Your breath hitches, but you don’t pull away this time. Instead, you let the weight of his words sink in. He isn’t asking for grand promises or declarations. He’s asking for a chance—a chance to be the person you turn to, the one who stays when others would leave.
“Would you allow me?” Sylus asks softly, almost pleading.
“Can you let me in?”
There’s a long pause as the world around you holds its breath. Then, finally, you nod.
“Yes,” you whisper, voice trembling. “I’ll try.”
And with that, the dam inside you breaks. For the first time in a long time, you let yourself believe that maybe, just maybe, you can learn to love again.
Sylus would show you how much you mean to him ..✨️
#suiwrites🍒#sylus x reader#love and deepspace x reader#lads x reader#lnds x reader#l&ds x reader#love and deepspace#love and deepspace x you#love and deepspace x mc#sylus x you#sylus x mc#sylus x y/n#lads sylus x reader#lads x you#lnds sylus x reader#l&ds sylus x reader#lnds sylus#lads sylus#l&ds sylus
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╰┈➤ megumi fushiguro x reader ೃ⁀➷
synopsis; you draw a portrait of megumi - striking a chord in his heart that has never been played before.
cw; angst angst angst, gumi baby :(
"Gumi."
He's silent, not looking up from the soon to be cherished piece of art beneath him
"Gumibear." You whisper, trying to contain your giggles as Megumi's eyes remain unblinking - holding the sheet of paper in his hands silently. His fingers gripped it hard - not hard enough to damage it in any way - but enough to have you biting your lip nervously
"If you don't like it I could always - "
"No. No, I..." He begins, but his voice trails off as his fingers trace the finger prints and smudge of coal on the sheet as he tries desperately to suppress the smile that was threatening to break out on his face
You had drawn him. Drawn Megumi - with nothing but a pencil. The detail was incredible - recreating the gentle slope of his nose perfectly and depicting his eyes so lovingly that he found his hands slightly trembling as he inspected the drawing further
He imagined you bopping your head to your playlist as you drew it - giggling like a sweet fool as you drew the boy you claimed to love with those talented hands of yours.
He could see your little scribbles in the corner - small hearts drawn, his initials beside yours and other nonsense that had his heart beating fast
"It's beautiful."
There was a slight shake in his voice, a vulnerability that had your eyes softening as you move closer and wrap your arms around him
"Thank you. You're right - it is. It's not because of the artist - but because of the art." You say, moving to cup his face and place a gentle kiss on his nose as he carefully sets the paper on his bedside - turning to you with a love that fluttered in his chest like a bird let out of its cage
He pulls you into him, hiding his face in the crook of your neck as he let out a shuddering breath
"You're wrong. That's not it." He says, lifting his face to meet your eyes. You're looking up at him so patiently - a doting smile on your face as you wait for him to continue and he swears the bird in his chest is soaring now
He grabs your hands - intertwining your fingers with his. He holds your gaze as he brings your knuckles to his lips - pressing a firm kiss onto the back of your hand before he moves it to cup his cheeks
"Your hands made this. That's why it's so special to me."
It's the same hands he holds now - cold and dead as his tears fall on your face.
When Megumi cried for the first time in front of you - you had cradled him to your chest and promised it would be ok. Promised you'd help him during these dark times - times where the evil in this world was too much to bear.
Out of all the wonderful things you were, your only flaw was that you were a liar.
Because you left him when you promised you'd be there to face the world with him - when your soothing hands and gentle love healed the unberable ache in his chest -
It burns. The pain behind his eyes is so raw and only intensifying that he can barely see your face as they close the coffin - his vision blurry from tears and a raging sadness that wasn't strong enough to bring you back to him.
He'd be with you soon - you'd sit in his lap and whine whenever he wasn't sitting still enough for you to sketch out quick enough. He'd roll his eyes and say you were wasting your talent on such a boring face - and you'd smile, calling him the most handsome soul in the world.
He'll find you soon enough. He'll cry himself to sleep the nights he remembers you died afraid and alone. He hopes he ends the same way.
Megumi was not a liar.
He said he'd find you. There was only one way for him to be with you, and after he finished his duty here - he'll be by your side, sitting as still as you want him to as you sketch out the oh too familair face.
He'll find you. It'll be the last thing he ever does. He's not a liar - he'll do it. He swears. He vows. He promises.
#jujutsu kaisen#jjk#jjk x reader#jjk x y/n#jjk x you#megumi x reader#megumi fushiguro#megumi fushiguro x reader#fushiguro x reader#jujutsu kaisen megumi#jjk drabbles#・❥ 𝐛𝐞𝐞 𝐰𝐫𝐢𝐭𝐞𝐬!#jjk megumi#angst#jjk angst#jujutsu kaisen x reader#megumi fushiguro x you#megumi fushiguro x y/n#megumi x you#megumi x y/n#sorry lovies :(
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⸻ ᴛ ʜ ᴇ ᴛ ʏ ʀ ᴀ ɴ ᴛ ⸻
Pairing: Yandere HOTD x Targaryen Reader Part 2
Summary: After your mother's death, your life wasn't the same anymore. Everything was changing so fast and you were just watching.
Warning: Y/n herself is a warning.
Notes: English is not my first language. Gifs don't belong to me, credit to the owner. Hope you enjoy!
The air felt cool against her damp skin as she stood in front of the window, watching the distant glow of King's Landing beneath the night sky. Her body was still warm from the bath, the steam lingering in the room as it slowly dissipated, leaving behind the soft scent of lavender and rosewater.
She let her fingers trace the edges of the windowpane, feeling the cold, hard glass beneath her fingertips. It was quiet tonight—eerily so. The usual sounds of the city seemed muted, as if the world outside had gone still, holding its breath.
Her handmaid, Elira, stood behind her, gently brushing through her wet hair. The familiar rhythm of the bristles moving through her locks was soothing, almost meditative. Elira had always been there. Since the very beginning. They were the same age, but Elira had always known her place—quiet, loyal, obedient. Always there, always in the background, never faltering.
"It still hurts, you know... losing her." She spoke softly, her voice almost a whisper, more to herself than to Elira. She stared out into the dark horizon, her eyes distant. "Mother was... everything. The only person who truly knew me."
Elira didn't respond—she never did when it came to such things. She just kept brushing her hair, silent, attentive, like the shadow she had always been.
The ache in her chest intensified, a dull, ever-present throb that threatened to consume her. Who’s going to love me now? Her mother had been everything. The one person who had always been kind, always been gentle. And now, she was gone. The gods, if they even existed, had taken her away. Not just her mother, but her newborn brother as well.
Y/n blinked slowly, her eyes burning. Why did they take them? What kind of gods would do this? Why leave me behind with nothing? She couldn’t understand it, couldn’t process the emptiness that had swallowed her whole since that day. The pain was constant, gnawing at her insides like a beast that wouldn’t stop.
She hadn’t left this room since they told her. She hadn’t gone to the funeral. What would be the point? Rhaenyra had been the one to carry their mother’s body. She could have done that too. She could have honored her mother, but what was the point when she wasn’t even here? She was dead. Dead.
Y/n closed her eyes for a moment, letting herself sink into the sensation of the brush moving through her hair. "I loved her. I always did... I was kind to her, wasn't I?" The words felt heavy on her tongue, as if she were asking herself more than Elira. She knew the answer already. She had been kind. She had been gentle.
She sighed softly, her breath fogging the glass in front of her as her thoughts drifted. It was supposed to be a boy. A brother. I would’ve been kind to him too. She had already chosen the Dreamfyre egg for him, already imagined what he would look like with his silver hair and violet eyes.
But now... there was no brother. No mother. Just silence.
Suddenly, a sharp tug at her scalp broke through her thoughts, jolting her back to the present. She flinched slightly, her eyes narrowing as she turned her head just enough to glance at Elira.
"I'm so sorry, princess! Please forgive me!" Elira’s voice trembled, her hands shaking as she quickly let go of the brush, dropping it to the floor. She fell to her knees, her head bowed low, not daring to look up at Y/n. "Please, forgive me, I didn’t mean to hurt you. I didn’t... please, please, forgive me..."
Y/n stared down at her, unblinking, her mind oddly blank. Elira had always been loyal. She had always done what she was told. And now here she was, groveling on the floor, begging for forgiveness over a simple tug of hair. It was... pathetic.
But she didn’t feel angry. She didn’t feel anything.
"It's alright," she said calmly, her voice soft but devoid of emotion. "You can continue."
Elira hesitated for a moment, her hands still trembling as she slowly picked up the brush again, standing on shaky legs. She resumed her task, this time more careful, her movements slower, more deliberate.
Y/n turned back to the window, her gaze distant once more, her mind drifting in and out of the haze that had settled over her ever since her mother’s death. She could still hear Elira sniffling softly behind her, no doubt still terrified of making another mistake.
It’s fine, she told herself. She’s always been like this. Always afraid. Always apologizing. But it didn’t matter. None of it mattered.
She closed her eyes again, her fingers tracing the cool glass once more, feeling the chill seep into her skin.
“I made a decision,” Viserys looked between his daughters. “I have chosen to name Rhaenyra as my heir.”
The words hit her like a wave of ice-cold water, freezing her smile in place. Wait… what? Her mind stumbled, struggling to make sense of the words. Rhaenyra? She blinked, willing herself to understand, to hear something else, but the reality pressed on her, unyielding.
“That’s… great, Father!” she managed, her voice tight and bright. Her lips twitched, and somehow, she forced them into a smile. She clasped her hands in front of her, feeling them shake, the tremors threatening to give her away. Hold it together, she thought desperately, teeth gritted behind her smile. Don’t let them see. Don’t let them see.
A cacophony of voices began to rise within her, whispering, hissing, each word cutting into her like a thousand small blades. Weak… pathetic… that’s what you are.
Her nails dug into her palms as she continued to hold her smile. No, I’m not weak… he just doesn’t see my worth yet. He doesn’t understand. But he will, he will…
That’s why Father chose her, isn’t it? Because you’re useless. Because you’re nothing.
She swallowed hard, her throat dry, and glanced sideways at Rhaenyra, who was watching her with a mixture of pride and hesitance. Rhaenyra, the golden girl. Rhaenyra, the heir. Rhaenyra… the one Father loves. Her stomach twisted painfully, but she forced herself to keep smiling, her jaw aching from the strain.
Of course he doesn’t love you, they continued. Why would he? You’re not what he wanted. You’re just a mistake, a failure, a useless little girl who couldn’t be more than a shadow.
Her heart hammered against her ribs, each beat like a drum in her ears. She felt hollow, as if she were disappearing from within, crumbling like ash. I’m not useless, I’m not… But they laughed, drowning her, making it impossible to think.
Look at him. Look at how he looks at her. Do you see that warmth in his eyes? He has never looked at you like that. He never will.
Her hands were trembling openly now, and she clasped them tighter, willing herself to stop, to silence the whirlwind inside her. I am more than this, she thought, but the words felt empty, like something fragile that could shatter with a single breath. She lifted her gaze to her father, but his expression was unchanged, his eyes full of pride—for Rhaenyra.
That’s all you are, isn’t it? A disappointment. A shadow, unwanted and unloved.
Her head swam, and she could barely hear anything beyond the mocking laughter echoing in her mind. But she kept smiling, the mask she wore cracking at the edges, her heart sinking with each passing second. You're wrong. You're wrong about me. Father does love me… he has to…
“Are you all right?” Viserys asked, frowning slightly.
The words jolted her back to the room, and she forced herself to nod, ignoring the way her throat tightened. “Yes, Father,” she said, her voice barely a whisper. She wanted to scream, to cry, to tear down everything around her, but instead, she turned to leave, her face carefully blank.
As she walked away, the voices clawed at her, unrelenting, ruthless.
Useless. Unwanted. Weak. That’s why he chose her. That’s why he’ll always choose her. Because you will never be enough.
It's finally over. It had been a long day, a day that had dragged on for what seemed like an eternity. Today Rhaenyra had been named heir to the Iron Throne and she had to bow before her.
As she walked, Elira, kept a respectful distance behind her, her soft footsteps barely audible. The quiet murmur of the castle, usually so comforting to Y/n, only seemed to intensify the ache in her chest. She quickened her pace, her heels clicking sharply against the stone floor as the thoughts spiraled deeper. Why her? Why not me?
"Thanks the gods it's Princess Rhaenyra,"
Y/n froze, her entire body stiffening as she heard the words. Her mind raced, and her steps slowed, her breath catching. She looked around the corner, and saw a small group of servants standing near a doorway, talking among themselves. Her gaze narrowed as she caught the full statement.
"Ah, yes, I'm really thankful the King didn’t choose that mad cunt," one of them laughed, a harsh, ugly sound that made her skin crawl.
"What did you say?"
They immediately froze when they heard her, their faces draining of color. She could hear their frantic whispers, the way their voices faltered in fear. One of them, took a hesitant step backward.
The servants' eyes widened, and they all started stammering apologies, their words tangled together in a rush of panic.
"Please, my lady, we meant no harm, we were just—"
"We were just talking, milady. Please forgive us—"
"Please don’t—"
Her eyes locked onto the boy who had spoken the words. He looked terrified now, his face pale, his eyes wide with fear. She took a step forward, the rage bubbling over, her movements fluid and quick as she closed the distance between them. The boy shrank back, but it was too late.
“What the fuck did you just say to me?” Y/n half-yelled, her voice a venomous hiss. Everything that had been building inside her—the anger, the hurt, the rejection—came flooding out in a violent, unstoppable wave.
The servants froze, some of them taking instinctive steps back, but they couldn’t escape.
Before the boy could even react, Y/n was on him, her hands grabbing his hair. With a sickening crack, she slammed his skull against the stone wall. She didn’t even register the impact at first, her vision turning red as the anger clouded her thoughts. She did it again. And again. And again.
The sound of his skull crashing against the stone echoed in her ears, drowning out everything else. She didn’t hear the cries, the pleading, the desperate sobs. She didn’t hear Elira begging her to stop, her voice barely cutting through the haze of fury.
"Stop! Please! Stop!" Elira cried, her voice high with fear, but Y/n was beyond reason now. She could feel the boy’s head break beneath her hands, could feel the blood running down her fingers. The sound of his sobs, his frantic begging, only drove her further into madness.
And then, after what felt like an eternity, it was over. She stood there, panting, her breath ragged as she stared down at the boy’s lifeless body. His head was a mangled mess, blood seeping out from the cracks in his skull. Her hands were slick with it, the red staining her fingers, her palms.
She blinked, coming back to herself slowly. The haze began to clear. She looked down at the body, her heart still racing, the adrenaline still coursing through her veins. Her chest heaved, and for a moment, she could barely comprehend what had just happened. She didn’t even remember how she’d gotten here, or how many times she’d struck him.
He’s dead.
The thought hit her like a punch to the gut. Her heart sank, but the anger still simmered beneath the surface, still clawing at her insides. She turned to look around at the others—the servants were trembling, staring at her in horror, their faces pale and filled with fear.
Why... Why they are looking at me like this?
Y/n glanced down at her dress, now soaked in blood. It was one of her favorites. She frowned as she looked at the deep red stains, the fabric ruined. What a pity.
With a deep sigh, she straightened up, her anger beginning to ebb, leaving a hollow emptiness behind. Her voice was calm, too calm, as she turned to the servants. “Clean this mess up,” she ordered, her voice flat. “And make sure no one finds out about it.”
She didn’t care how they did it, just as long as it was done. She turned to Elira, her voice still controlled, though her emotions were a mess inside her. “Prepare the bath for me,” she said softly, almost pitiful. “I need to wash.”
As she walked away, Elira hesitated for a moment before following her. The others remained rooted to the spot, too afraid to move. Y/n walked through the hallways, the blood drying on her hands, her mind drifting in a haze of confusion and sadness.
I’m so tired. The thought came suddenly, washing over her like a wave. She let out a breath, shaking her head slightly.
But as she entered her chambers, she start thinking about the scene she left behind. The servants would clean it. They always did. But they would never forget. And neither would she.
With that, she closed the door behind her, her thoughts already shifting again, the sadness creeping back in.
"The realm will never accept a woman as their ruler," Rhaenys muttered, her voice laced with the bitterness that always seemed to cloud her words when the topic of succession arose.
Y/n tilted her head and nodded, the movement slow, almost sympathetic. Oh, how tragic, she thought, her lips curling into a faint smirk. All this whining and hand-wringing. Pathetic.
She softened her features, arranging her face into what she imagined looked like mild concern. "Tragic, isn’t it?" she said, her voice dripping with a smooth, honeyed sarcasm that neither of them seemed to catch.
"When I am queen I will create a new order," Rhaenyra said, her tone defiant, her chin lifted as though challenging the world to disagree.
Yes, yes, Rhaenyra, I’m sure you would be a shining example of wisdom and honor, Y/n thought, fighting back a laugh. Keep dreaming.
"Of course you would, dear sister," Y/n replied smoothly, giving a slight, dismissive nod. "The realm would be lucky to have you."
Rhaenys glanced at her, as if sizing her up, before letting out a low, sardonic chuckle. "Men would sooner burn the kingdom than let a woman sit on the throne," she said, a bitter truth in her words that, for some reason, still failed to resonate with Y/n. Power wasn’t something one was given—it was taken. And anyone too weak to seize it had no right to it in the first place.
She hid her thoughts behind a sip of wine, watching them both with a half-lidded gaze, letting their words drift over her like idle gossip. What a pair they are—one too proud to realize her limitations, the other too bitter to let go of her grievances.
"Oh, yes, a kingdom ablaze," Y/n murmured, feigning a wistful tone. "How poetic. Such a tragic tale, isn’t it?" She held out her glass, staring into the dark red liquid as if pondering something deeply moving, though in truth, she was only admiring the way the light caught the wine.
Rhaenyra sighed heavily. "They underestimate us. They see us as delicate things, fit only to be wives and mothers."
"Do they?" Y/n’s smile widened, an amused glint in her eyes. Oh, the endless suffering. Boo-hoo.
Rhaenys was watching her with an arched brow, clearly picking up on the subtle mockery in her tone. "You don’t seem very troubled by any of this, Y/n," she observed, almost as if accusing her.
Y/n shrugged, a slow, lazy movement that exuded indifference. "Oh, I am devastated, truly," she replied, the sarcasm practically dripping from her words. "What a tragic world we live in, where women like us must endure such indignities. Really, it’s heartbreaking."
Rhaenyra shot her a sharp look. "This isn’t a joke, Y/n."
"Of course not," Y/n replied, her voice smooth as silk, unfazed by her sister’s disapproval. "Nothing about any of this is funny." She took another sip, savoring the wine and the absurdity of it all. I should be the one that wear the crown, not you.
Then, as though the thought had only just occurred to her, she sighed and placed her empty goblet aside. "Ah, but I must take my leave, unfortunately." She glanced over at them, feigning a regretful expression. "I’ve a fitting to attend for my dress, you know, for Father’s wedding. It simply wouldn’t do to be unprepared for such an occasion."
The slight in her tone was subtle, but it was there, veiled in a pleasant smile. The wedding going to happen sooner or later. What a spectacle it would be. Their dear father, so desperate to secure his legacy that he’d wed a mere girl, and all to produce another heir—a boy, if the gods were willing, and if not… well, it hardly mattered to her.
"How dutiful of you," Rhaenys remarked, a hint of mockery in her voice. It was clear she saw through Y/n’s thin veneer of civility.
"Indeed." Y/n inclined her head, lips quirking in a smug smile. "After all, it’s so important to play our parts well, isn’t it?"
She glanced back at them one last time, giving them both a pointed look, her smile widening as she took in their earnest, troubled faces. "Farewell, then. Do enjoy your discussion. Such deep, meaningful words, truly," she said, voice dripping with false admiration as she turned on her heel, sauntering away without a second glance.
Y/n strode toward her father’s chambers, Ser Criston trailing like a shadow at her side. She had a perfectly charming smile painted on her lips until she came up short, blocked by two guards standing in front of the doors. Their hands gripped their spears, glancing at each other nervously before looking back at her.
“Step aside,” she said, voice a silky command.
The guards didn���t budge.
One of them, foolishly brave or utterly clueless, raised a hand. “I’m sorry, my lady, but the King has asked to not be disturbed.”
Her smile faltered, her eyes narrowing ever so slightly. “You’re saying I can’t see my father?” Her voice was calm, almost amused. She tilted her head, letting her gaze drift over their faces with cold scrutiny. “Are you sure that’s wise?”
The guard stiffened, clearly feeling her gaze like a blade. “We have orders.”
She chuckled, the sound smooth as honey but laced with venom. “And do you have any idea what I could do to you for disobeying me?” She leaned in, voice dropping low. “I could have your tongues ripped out, have you hanging from the city walls by your intestines, all while you beg for mercy.” She smiled, sickly sweet. “Or I could just tell my father you disrespected his daughter.”
The guards flinched, glancing at each other but standing firm.
She clicked her tongue, gaze sharpening. “Perhaps I should have Ser Criston here peel the skin from your faces, inch by inch? How does that sound?”
Criston’s hand drifted to his sword, his eyes darkening in anger at their defiance. Before he could make a move, Otto appeared around the corner, striding toward them with his usual calm authority.
“Ah, my lord Hand,” Y/n said, smile widening as she turned toward Otto. She cast the guards one last look before redirecting her attention.
Otto looked at her and then at the guards, clearly sensing the tension in the air. “Is there a problem here, princess?” His voice was calm, as if he hadn’t just walked into a potential bloodbath.
She tilted her head, letting out a soft, exasperated sigh. “Oh, nothing major, Lord Hand,” she purred. “Just a minor misunderstanding. These men seem to think they have the right to keep me from my father’s chambers. Quite peculiar, don’t you think?” She cast a smug glance at the guards, watching as they shifted uncomfortably.
The guards started to speak up, but Y/n shot them a warning glare, silencing them immediately. “In fact, I’d say it was downright insulting.”
Otto nodded thoughtfully, his expression neutral. “Well, princess, your father is about to attend the small council meeting. I’ve come to fetch him myself.”
She clenched her jaw, an annoyed sigh slipping from her lips as she finally gave a small nod. Fucking cock suckers. But she kept her expression calm, respectful even. Otto had always been fond of her—treated her like one of his own, in a way. No need to break that little bond just yet.
“Very well,” she murmured, stepping back as she allowed Otto to enter. She watched him disappear into the chamber, then turned her gaze back toward the guards, her expression a warning that needed no words. They quickly looked away, pretending to be more interested in the floor.
Moments later, Otto returned with her father. Viserys offered her a faint, apologetic smile, but his focus seemed elsewhere, a bit distracted. Odd. Otto, too, seemed unusually composed, almost as if there was something else on his mind.
As they walked away, Y/n glanced toward the chamber doors, half-distracted, until she caught a flash of red hair in the corner of her vision. A woman’s figure seated on the edge of the bed—her father’s bed.
Her heart skipped a beat, eyes widening. She had to suppress a sudden laugh, biting her nails as her excitement bubbled up. Oh, now that’s just… delicious.
There’s no way… Is that…? Did Otto really…? Oh, you sly, clever old fox. So that’s why Father’s been so preoccupied. And here I thought he was just mourning my poor Mother.
“Are you all right, my lady?” Criston’s voice brought her back to the present. He glanced at her with concern.
She smiled at him, a flash of brightness that was all teeth. “I’m perfectly fine, Ser Criston,” she murmured, her gaze still lingering on that red hair. Alicent. The Hand’s sweet little daughter, warming dear Father’s bed where Mother once lay. Oh, it was almost poetic.
Without another word, she wrapped her arm around Criston’s, a little too tight, leading him away, her smile widening as her mind danced with happiness. The thrill of it all simmered under her skin, making her eyes glint with a mad sort of glee.
Oh, Rhaenyra… if only you knew. Your dear friend is right here, warming our father’s bed. Such a pity you don’t see it yet. Poor, poor little sister.
Criston glanced at her, brow furrowed in confusion. “Is something the matter, my lady?”
“Nothing at all,” she purred, letting out a small laugh. “I’m just… happy, that’s all.”
As the small council convened, Viserys rose to his feet, his expression serious yet strained. She cast a brief glance at Rhaenyra beside her, who watched their father with rapt attention, completely unaware.
Don’t tell me Father’s actually going to—
“I have decided… I am to marry Lady Alicent Hightower.”
The silence that followed was exquisite. Y/n’s smirk widened as she glanced sideways at Rhaenyra, whose face had turned from shock to disbelief. Rhaenyra’s eyes met Y/n’s, wide and wounded, and in that brief exchange, Y/n’s smirk told her everything. Yes, dear sister, I knew. I knew before you did. And now… so do you.
Y/n’s gaze turned cold as she looked across the room at Corlys. He sat motionless for a moment, disbelief and anger barely concealed in his face as he processed what the King had just announced. She barely held back her sneer of disgust.
This pathetic man… offering up his child to this decrepit old fool just to worm his way closer to the throne. What a spineless little weasel. Tried to sell sweet Leana to Father… You’re nothing but a cock-sucking snake, Corlys.
Corlys’ face hardened. Offended, he shot Viserys a withering look before standing abruptly and leaving the room in silence. Y/n’s eyes followed him, the smirk still tugging at her lips. Good riddance, you worm.
Next to her, Rhaenyra had gone pale. She shot a look of absolute betrayal at Alicent, whose face was touched with guilt, as if she’d known this moment was coming yet hadn’t prepared for the sight of her friend’s hurt. Then turning on her heel and storming out.
Poor, naive Rhaenyra… How perfect, to have this all crumble around you while you stood unaware.
But Y/n stayed, savoring the stunned silence that filled the room, and then, without missing a beat, she plastered on her most sincere smile.
“Congratulations, Father!” she chimed, her voice warm as she moved toward Viserys.
Viserys let out a sigh, though a relieved one, as she embraced him, patting her arm gently. “Thank you, my dear,” he replied, clearly grateful for her support.
She released him, turning to Alicent, who was still wide-eyed, not quite sure what to make of the sudden affection Y/n was showing. She shifted uncomfortably as Y/n opened her arms to her.
“Alicent,” Y/n murmured, drawing her in with a tight embrace, voice sweet as honey. She leaned close to her ear, her words just barely audible to anyone but Alicent.
“Oh, Alicent,” she murmured into her ear, “I always knew you were a little whore.” She felt Alicent’s body stiffen, but she continued, undeterred. “You shouldn’t be so pleased with yourself—you’ve married my rotting father, after all.” She let out a mocking laugh, barely a whisper. “I can only imagine… his ‘crown jewels’ are as decrepit as the rest of him. But lucky you, you’re the perfect breeding mare, aren’t you? A nice, wet hole to keep his cock warm,” she added, voice dripping with contempt, “Every night you’ll lay with him, his decaying hands on you, his disgusting, rotting body. I’ll bet even his—” she sneered, “—cock is rotting.”
Alicent’s face flushed, her breath catching as she stood, stunned and trembling in Y/n’s arms. Y/n only smiled, tilting her head to kiss her on the cheek.
“I’m so happy for you, Mother,” she cooed, her voice dripping with sweetness.
Alicent, visibly shaken, managed a faltering smile, her eyes glistening with unshed tears. “Thank you… daughter.”
Part 1 Part 3 Part 4
@ʀᴏᴛᴛᴇɴꜰʏʀᴇ 2024. ᴅᴏɴ'ᴛ ᴄᴏᴘʏ, ᴛʀᴀɴꜱʟᴀᴛᴇ ᴏʀ ᴜꜱᴇ ᴀɴʏ ᴏꜰ ᴍʏ ᴡᴏʀᴋꜱ ʜᴇʀᴇ ᴏʀ ᴀɴʏ ᴏᴛʜᴇʀ ᴡᴇʙꜱɪᴛᴇꜱ
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still wakes the deep au | soap x f!reader
Installment 2/?: Warning Signs
prompt: You're an environmental scientist conducting research on an off-shore oil rig with only a few days left before you're slated to leave. The eldritch creature they accidentally awaken throws a wrench in the works. masterlist
Being alone feels different when there’s nowhere to run. Every wall looks the same, and the stench of must permeates in every room–the carpet must hold it in. Everything drips; the taste of salt won’t go away, and it makes your eyes dry out every time you close them and open them again. There are other people around you, men that are the cause of the knocks against the rig, but they are as alien as what lies beneath you. Every time you feel as if it’s too foreign, you remind yourself that there is nowhere to go.
The only way out of this place is by doing your job; but even that scares you all of the sudden.
Your bed is lumpy. The mattress feels dry, stiff, and it barely gives as you lay in it. You stare up at the bottom of the top bunk, trying not to think about the sound of sea water pelting your window like a threatening knock while you try to sleep.
Your mind barely gives. You keep the lamp that sits on your makeshift desk turned on. Without it, the black of nothingness from outside bleeds through the walls, and you swear you can see a thousand different shapes that claw their way out of the moonlight towards you. The rig doesn’t shake, but it breathes. It lives, somehow, deep legs connected to the seafloor to keep it from drifting off, from separating, from taking you with it, from suffocating you until your breaths are filled with water and your body is too cold to–
You jump when the lamp bursts. A jolt of electricity shatters the bulb, and you sit up in bed, clutching the sheets as you watch the lamp glow slightly before fizzling out. The room blankets into the dark, and you move shakily off your bed and pat around for your flashlight before clicking it on. The small circle of yellow light doesn’t do what you hoped; instead, it makes the shadows of every object longer and seem further away, and they start to move as your hand shakes, so much so that you cannot tell if something is coming towards you or if your mind is still convincing you of some sort of seasickness. One lodged into your brain, one that doesn’t make you nauseous but makes you paranoid that some hole in the ocean will open up and take you with it.
The thought of drowning is not as terrifying as finding out what lies beneath the surface of the water.
When you used to think of the ocean, it used to soothe you. When you closed your eyes, all you could see was crystal clear blue and tropical fish. You thought about running your fingers through warm water and kicking your feet as you watched dolphins fly beside you. When the sun penetrated the light, it shined until it showed the seafloor, where little creatures burrowed beneath bright sand, making it sparkle.
The ocean you know now is anything like it. You understand what they mean when they say “mother nature,” because only a woman scorned could eat the world the way she does. Waves touching taller than buildings. Animals so large, they would swallow you whole and let the acid of their insides quiet your screams for nutrition. An endless void, reaching miles towards the center of earth, a vast unknown that crushes heavy metals and defies physics the further and further you drop. She’s unforgiving. Mean. A terrifying, wonderful thing, and you are cheating death. You know it. She screams at you from just outside your thin walls, and you are pretending not to hear her. She’s telling you something, but you bury your nose in your books.
If it’s a warning she’s trying to give, you won’t know it until it’s too late.
The rig groans in the middle of the night. You can hear the pipes expanding, the water moving aggressively outside your window, the sounds of cranes and metal creaking that rattle off around you. Your hand shakes a little as you try and find your shoes, slipping them on as you open your door in search of a new source of light.
It’s the middle of the night, but there’s still a skeleton crew around, moving between their night shifts. You make your way down the hall, clicking off your flashlight, and you find yourself in the rec room in search of light bulbs in the utility closet there. You hear the doors swing open behind you, and you try to ignore the rowdy voices of men as you stand on your tiptoes and rummage the hundredth box for what you need. You try not to think about the whisps of something delicate you feel grazing your fingertips (because spiders wouldn’t be this far out from land, right?).
“Looks like ye need a little help, bonnie.”
You startle yourself nearly out of your skin. You trip off the ledge you’re standing on, trying to hold your hands out to brace yourself, but you never hit the ground. Strong hands grip you around the middle, breaking your fall and getting you back onto your feet, nice and steady. You spin around, clutching your flashlight to your chest, panting like an anxious puppy. You can make out his blue eyes even in the dark, bright and seemingly concerned as Soap tries to get a grip on you to keep you from swaying.
“‘S alright, lass, ‘s just me! Soap, it’s Soap.”
You put a hand over your chest, trying to calm your breathing, You shake your head, closing your eyes as you try and repeat the mantra you’ve been telling yourself since you got on this stupid rig.
Your feet are on solid ground. Your feet are on solid ground. Your feet are on solid ground.
“Sorry,” you whisper. “I…”
“What are ye doin’ up?” He asks, clicking his tongue. “‘S the middle of the night! Reckon ye need yer beauty sleep.”
You smile a bit, but it doesn’t reach your eyes. You do it to placate him. Men don’t always respond well to sharp teeth, and you haven’t decided how you feel about this one yet. He’s too comfortable. His hands are still around your arms, thumbs smoothing too easily over the bone of your shoulders. He’s too close; he steps just nearer to you, tongue sliding over that top row of teeth, and you try not to think about the way his pupils dilate at the terrified look on your face, the one your smile cannot hide. When he tilts his head to the side, you think he means to look curious, but you think it closer to prey playing with its food. The curls of his growing mohawk fall over his forehead, drawing a dark shadow over his eyes, and you can no longer try to see what might give him away in his gaze.
“The light in my…room. I need a new one, I–” You shake your head. “It’s stupid, but I just…I can’t sleep.”
“We’ll get ye all right fer bed, love,” Soap chuckles. “What’s broken, ye ken what kind ye need?”
You blink, biting your lip, thinking. He’s still touching you; he still has his hands around your arms, but now they’ve settled around your elbow, calloused fingers curled over where they rest.
“I’m not sure. The lamp on my desk, it’s–”
“Ach, those are hidin’, I’m sure o’ it,” he lets you go, reaching up and hoisting down a few boxes before reaching for what lies behind them. He carries them on his shoulder before dropping them onto the floor, and you try not to think about watching him work. He’s a large man. Strong, that much is evident, but there’s something off. You think his physical appearance hides what lies inside. He’s pretty, in a way that shouldn’t be allowed. Straight teeth, a killer smile, arms that do not give once they’re taut with use. Even the uniform he wears does nothing to hide thicker thighs and a solid middle; but you try not to let it distract you from what really remains. If he wasn’t so gorgeous, you don’t think he’d get away with that tick that must exist in his brain. The one that allows him to crowd your space without much resistance. The one that lets him smile like that, like he’s won something, like he’s gotten what he wanted not because he fought for it, but because it is what he is owed.
He bends over and picks up a bulb that looks good enough and hands it to you. When he straightens his back, you try to catch that look in his eyes again. Maybe he knows you’re looking for it, and now he’s hiding it. Maybe he’s cooing in his own head about what a clever girl you are and trying to decide how he’ll play his game differently.
“Can walk ye back, put it in fer ye.”
You take it from him, drawing a shaky breath. You want to say no. You want to tell him you can do it all on your own, that you’re fine, but then the closet door swings open, and a group of tired-looking crew stare at the two of you as they snicker and nudge each other.
“Wot ye doin’, Soap, seven minutes in heaven with the fuckin’ feds?”
“Och–shut the fuck up, the lot o’ ye,” Soap bites back. “Just doin’ her fuckin’ job, just like the rest o’ ye, so get the fuck out the way. Middle of the night, bunch of gobshites.”
Soap puts a hand around the small of your back, guiding you past the group and out into the hallway. He follows you wordlessly back to accommodations, stopping in front of your door. Your name isn’t on it, but you don’t comment about how he knew this was yours. He waits for you to open the door for him before following you inside.
“A right mess, luvvie.”
He doesn’t let you help. He kicks your bin under the desk, carefully discarding of the pieces of glass that are scattered across your desk. He grumbles under his breath about it being too sharp and how he will do it better and how he can take care of ye.
When the lamp clicks back on, it paints the room in that comforting orange light, and you relax as you take a seat on your bed, clutching the sheets to dry your clammy palms. He still invades your space, but somehow, with the light, it dampens the sentiment. He scares you just a little less, but if you give him just that much, how much will he use it to his advantage?
“Ye need anythin’, I’m…just down there,” Soap says finally. He points behind him, down the north end of the hallway, and all you can do is nod. “Don’t listen to the lot, bonnie,” Soap adds. “Bunch o’ old, tired bastards. Mean no harm. But if they do, ye come ta me, ye hear?”
“Uhm…Soap?” You call out as he’s leaving. You don’t know why you stop him. You don’t know why you’re talking to him; you’re certain he’s not a stranger to telling a good lie. He turns to face you, leaning against the doorway, and you clear your throat. No one should look this good on just a few hours of sleep, but he’s still blinking awake, unsettlingly calm. “This place…it’s safe, right? I mean…safe as it ought to be?”
Soap smiles, but it’s not like his other smiles. It feels unnatural. His teeth are duller. Lips drier. Maybe he’s just tired.
“It’s safe, love. Swear it. Got me on those rivets.”
You don’t know why, but when he comes close to you, you let him. You let him touch your face, thick fingers smoothing down your jaw just a little too rough, big thumb along your bottom lip rubbing just a little too hard. You hear his door shut nearby once he goes.
The ocean screams. You can hear her again now that his voice is no longer around. You fall asleep knowing he’s close, and you pretend not to notice her. Just like always.
#what did you think i forgot?#;)#soap x reader#cod x reader#soap/reader#soap x you#john soap mactavish x reader#john mactavish x reader
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