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yooglefics · 7 months ago

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Reveal — Part one: recording

Pairing: Yoongi x fem!reader ( camboy!yoongi x camgirl!reader ) Wordcount: 2,198 words Genre: smut. 18+. mdni. don't use fanfics as your only source of sex ed, pls. Summary: your friend convinced you to record an audio for your OF, but doing it alone is nerve-wracking so you turn to your favorite creator for help.

Includes: Mentions of selling sex content. Mentions of sexual activity ( doing things and also talking about doing things ). Implicit masturbation instructions. Masturbation ( f and m ) ( wash your hands before putting them anywhere, folks ). People filming/recording sex acts. Use of pet names? ( baby, doll ). Dirty talk. Mentions of Jungkook x fem!reader but they are just frieeends. Author's note: I started writing this with hopes of it just being alright because I wanted to write something quick but then it got longer and here we are. Hope you like it! If you do please remember to leave a comment, reblog, ask, follow and what not. Thank you for reading <3

It's been six months since you started this side job. At first, it was a combination of curiosity and a little desperation since money was tight after your roommate and best friend decided to go back to live with her parents. You didn't complain too much about it because you didn't want her to feel bad, and besides, you actually missed having your own space.

But lonely nights with insomnia thanks to the stress at work, let you to explore sides of the internet you had only heard about in bathroom conversations. Curiosity got the best of you and so, here you are, going through comments on your last onlyfans post.

You've been able to grow a decent-sized audience, it may be a bit small to others but it’s manageable and you like that. Some of them are people you followed before, during your investigation stage, and now became your mutuals. You truthfully see them as your friends, like Jungkook.

He was the first person with quite a big audience who followed you back and you truly believe half your followers came from his page, even though he denies it and tells you it is all your doing. He really has a way of lifting your confidence and that's why after a few months you meet in person to shoot things together, nothing too spicy, just a shoot with Calvins and denim jackets. You were surprised when he didn't suggest something more than that, but Jungkook said “You're too sweet to fuck in a first meeting, but maybe later”.

You thought he was just partially joking, although a few meetings have passed and he hasn't tried anything. To be honest, is a bit disappointing since he is so attractive, but at least he is still willing to help you with fun photoshoots in your apartment.

A comment in the picture where Jungkook’s hand is around your throat caught your eye. When you suggested it, it was funny. A silly little joke about what people thought actually happened behind the scenes and a way to hide your face from the camera.

When you saw it after, it was less funny and much hotter. Even if he wasn't applying pleasure on your neck, the muscles on his forearm were visible under the ink, the lighting and shadows reflected on the skin of your chest that wasn't covered by the cami top you were wearing that day, and your gold babygirl collar sat perfectly on top of your breast.

You couldn't be mad at the people saying they wished to be in your place. You were jealous of yourself, damn it.

That's why the comment popped out between the others, because it was jealousy of Jungkook they were talking about.

[ JustADude: “Fuck. He is the luckiest man alive if he gets to hold you and listen to all your pretty sounds.” ]

Cheeks blushing, you giggle thinking about how Jungkook hasn't done those things. But you have to admit that the idea of people being interested in hearing is a turn on. And maybe it shouldn't be a surprise considering taking pictures for others does but… could you… ?

Your phone rings, indicating a text and interrupting your thoughts.

Kookie: told you, a voice reveal would be amazing!!

You laugh at the attached image been of the comment you were just reading.

Y/n: but i'm shyyyyy

Kookie: you can just record a masturbating session Kookie: and review it and decide if you post it or not

Y/n: if i review it i’ll not post it lol

Is true. You'll get too much in your head and shy away.

Y/n: i barely go over pics before posting because of it

You remember him as if he didn't check your newest pictures for you.

Kookie: i can help too! Kookie: i mean Kookie: no pressure, ofc Kookie: but it would be SOOO HOT

Not sure if it's for the idea of recording yourself or the fact that Jungkook is encouraging you, but your pussy reacts to the words on screen and is settled. You are doing it.

Following the suggestion of just recording a session, you prepare as usual, sitting cross-legged on your bed, laptop in front while looking for something… inspiring.

You think about maybe looking through Jungkook’s page, rewatching his last video, but at the end get too paranoid about him listening to himself in the background even if your mic is hooked up in your bra strap, as closest as it can to your mouth.

So, you think of something else. The image of a hand around your throat still fresh in your mind leads you to the page of someone whose hands you've been thinking about in many other sessions. SugaD.

A few taps on your keyboard and his page is flashing on your screen, those exact veiny hands greeting you on his last post.

“Oh, well… here goes nothing.”

Embracing yourself, you turn on your mic, giving a few taps to make sure it’s working, “hi,” a nervous giggle echoes your room, suddenly making you aware of the silence and glad you'll have noise beside your own.

Inspecting better Suga's post, you realize is an announcement for his last video, and the line “for all those asking for more hand porn, i got you ;)” feels like is calling you out, but you can start feeling the need between your legs so there's just so much shame and fucks to give left.

A few more clicks and the video is on full screen, starting with an empty black leather chair and then Suga coming into frame and sitting down. His face is not visible as in any other video, but following the movements of his hand, you realize his neck is. Pale skin in contrast with black t-shirt.

“This angle is kinda…” he trails off, soft laugh at the end.

“Hot,” you complete, confident Jungkook will, after laughing at you, delete it from the final audio.

“You can't tell me I'm mean anymore. I'm spoiling you,” Suga continues in the video, “I'm giving you this view and I'm giving you what's probably the thing you all ask the most for: hands.”

And there they are. His goddamn hands. Close frame and adorned with silver rings in a few fingers. And when he turns them around you can admire how veiny and manly they are.

“I hate him. I'm gonna sue him,” you murmur, because in the month you have been following him, something you've come to find out is that Suga always knows what he is doing. He knows that jiggling his fingers and making the accessories click, paint a picture on people's minds. He knows how to dirty talk without making it cringe. And, more than anything, knows how to tease and keep his audience on their toes.

You turn the volume down a bit more to make sure it really isn’t audible through your mic.

“Are you sitting, doll? Imagine you're on my lap right now,” he pats his tights and finally you move, positioning yourself on your knees as if you were, as he suggested, straddling him.

“That view would be amazing. You right here,” he pretends to hold someone by their hips in front of him and yours play pretend on your own body, moving them up and down as he does. “Maybe I'd tease you first, play with your tits, your nipples first. Why don't you do that, baby? Touch yourself for me.”

Letting out a groan is your way to express frustration against the fabric covering your chest, unable to remove your bra so the mic stays in the right place. Controlling your breath, you focus on the video again. Suga is playing with himself, hand against his chest just like yours, “How does it feel?”

“I want you to touch me,” you whisper. And clearly, you know he is not able to hear you, and you're scared you'd sound like an idiot at the end, but you figure this is your chance to experiment being a bit vocal. After all, this whole thing is supposed to be a voice reveal, not just moans.

Although, it's quite difficult not to do it with the sight on screen. “Look what you do to me,” he complains, voice raspy and hand traveling south to the bulge on his joggers.

“Are you hard?” You cringe at that one. Shaking your head to not let it get to much on your head and sending everything to the trash. Breathing, your right hand mirrors his actions and travels down your body.

He gropes himself with a groan and you moan just at the sound. Imagine a smirk on his face as you cup yourself through your underwear. The lace is so thin is impossible to hide the fact you're already so wet.

Another moan and you debate on skipping a few seconds on the video since you need him to do something. Give you anything.

But he is a teaser.

He strokes through layers of fabric even when his own noises let it be known is torture for him. “I wonder…” he breathes, “how much clothes do you have? Are you dressed like I am, or are you completely naked?” His hips thrust up, into his hand and he pulls it away. “Would you come by just grinding on my cock?”

“F-fuck,” you moan when he intentionally bucks his hips upward, veins on his hands popping up when he holds into the chair. You hate him, you really do. Because he is holding back and you just want to see him.

“Please, please,” and as if it were even possible he hears you, he takes his dick in one hand and out of his pants.

You moan in appreciation and finally allow your hand to sneak into your panties too. The much desired contact makes your legs feel like jelly for a second and you have to sit back on your heels while the guy on screen keeps driving you insane.

His hand moves up and down his length, thumb collecting precum at the tip and using it as lubricant, but when that is not enough, his hand disappears off the frame, up to his face. The sound is enough to help with the imagination and quickly he is back in business.

Your eyes are fixed on every movement, every sound. Your hand matches his speed and you don't know what is hotter, the wet skin sounds or the bracelet on his wrist? Because the silver chain moves as fast or even faster and makes a sound of its own. Ah, it is so impossible for you not to imagine what it would be to look at it from your perspective. If the fingers in your pusy were his.

You push into yourself, your breath caught at the sensation before adding another one, “ooh… oh.”

Can't master more than a few sounds, your mouth dry, it has been open since he uncovered himself. Oh, what would you do to have him in your mouth at least once.

“The things I'd do to you.” The recording continues, “And I bet you would let me, no questions asked, right?”

“S-so good,” your knees dig into your bed and you're glad you follow Jungkook's advice of protecting your duvet with a towel. “It feels so good, oh god.”

“Are you using your fingers? A toy? Would you like my dick instead?” He laughs breathlessly, “I would like to feel your pussy too. F-fuck, I'd fuck you so good, baby. Don’t you think so?”

“Uh uh,” short moans leave your lips, the palm of your hand rubbing on your clit before going back to back and forth motions. Fingering yourself and your eyes close as you enjoy the pleasure, and let more noises flow.

When you open them again Suga on screen has his other hand around his neck, head tilted back. Is not choking him, but you assume he is into that. “Oh… f-fu… pleasee,” he is going to be the end of you. How can you not imagine being on top of him, riding him, your hand on his throat or maybe his on yours. “I'm… oh, I'm…” a loud moan interrupts your announcement as you cum practically riding your hand.

There's silence. Well, your breathing is fast and the mic most likely will pick it up, but you try to compose yourself for a few seconds while looking at the blank screen that indicates Suga finished too. He never shows it on camera and the only indication he did is the aftermath, this time, on his black t-shirt when he says his “you did great, kitten” to sign off.

The next day Jungkook sends you the audio archive as promised. And is up on your page as fast as possible, it doesn't matter if it doesn't get attraction for a few hours because it's too early on the day, but if you think about it too much, you'd scratch the whole idea.

But not a minute passes and you have notifications of a new follower and a comment.

[ SugaD now follows you ] [ SugaD: the cutest. ]

➪ Part two. | ➪ Part three. | ➪ Updates for this verse | ➪ Ko-fi

➪ Main masterlist. | ➪ Updates in general | ➪ Request & chats ♡

Edit: i forgoooot! If you want to be tagged on part 2 or future projects let me know <3

Edit 2: I made a post with different options for tag lists in case anyone is interested. You know, for future projects and stuff. But don't feel preassure to request it, and thank you for following this mini series.

#( writing. )#min yoongi x reader #min yoongi smut #min yoongi fic #yoongi smut #yoongi x reader #bts x reader #yoongi fic #yoongi fanfic #bts fanfic #bts fic #( reveal )#( reveal: recording )#yooglefics

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asexualbookbird · 25 days ago

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Hm. Okay. So I didn't read a lot this last month. I've been fighting chronic illness and the brain fog that comes with it so really it's a miracle I read what I did. Didn't do any drawing challenge this year, but I DID knit a half dozen cool little things I can't yet share but am very excited about! I also had fun with the Tricking Treats this year. Yall really came through for that game this year, thanks! Acquired a nice new monitor for computer and it's been wonderful. Next step is speakers so I can watch things!

I feel like I made a pretty decent dent in my yearly reading list and while I don't think I'll finish it (waitlist for Jasmine Throne audio is still about sixteen weeks long), I'm happy with where I am. Three (3!!) books I read this month were from the list and I think that's very cool and executive functioning of me.

In Other Lands by Sarah Rees Brennan ⭐⭐⭐½ - A friend has been trying to get me to read this since it came out and I've always put it off because our tastes are SO different, but I didn't hate this! I mostly enjoyed it! It missed a few marks for me and I wouldn't really want to read it again, but I'm glad I experienced it. Love a good gremlin of a main character.

Red Sister by Mark Lawrence ⭐ - Yawn. Snore. Boring. Read for book club, but I wasn't exactly not interested in it on my own. IT just. Didn't hit right. Mark Lawrence needs to stop being afraid of aging up his characters because there is no way a nine year old is doing all that. Was this scifi? Where those space ships?? Is the moon haunted??? Who knows. Who cares. Not I.

Strange the Dreamer by Laini Taylor ⭐⭐⭐⭐ - I am forever a Daughter of Smoke and Bone girlie (gender neutral) so I've been avoiding this because what if I don't like it?? Spoiler! I did like it! It somehow scratched the hole left in my heart after DoSaB, but still felt distinct and unique. Did not like the insta love going on, yall have known each other for like twelve hours what do you mean you're In Love. Visuals were great and world building stunning as always. I wish Laini Taylor published more books, I love the worlds she creates.

Once & Future by AR Capetta and Cory McCarthy ⭐ - I'm never reading another book with Jimmy Pees name on it ever again. I meant to do a full review on this one, but time slipped away. I think this could be SO GOOD if it was reworked to two books where book one stopped at the time skip and book two took more time to overthrow the Evil Capitalist. It was too on the nose. It felt like middle grade, it dealt with older young adult topics. Merlin fucking sucked. I find it icky that everyone was paired off except for the ace character who EVERYONE HATED. Sure they came around to her, but ONLY AFTER IT WAS MADE CLEAR SHE WASN'T INTO GWEN. Ick. Full of potential, and yet.

Not a great reading month. Maybe November will be kinder. I'm slowly getting through Sunbringer, and am enjoying what I'm read so far so things are looking up. Going to see Nerd Squad soon. Still making knitted things I can't share until after the holidays. Tricking Treats also made me excited to do art again and because there were so many I ended up learning a lot about how CSP works which is fun! So hey! November is looking good! November is looking fun! I WILL MAKE IT FUN!

#bookbird babbles #reading wrap up #monthly wrap up #october wrap up #books #booklr #my health has Not Been Good yall lmaaoooo #i hate insurance its such a scam #just give me my meds!!!!!!!!!!!! the dr prescribed them for a reason!!!!!!! who are you to say its unnecessary!#also disability took away 100$ every month because 'my income changed' but the only income i have is their payments so like.#lol. lmao even.#idk its a mess over here but i refuse to die about it

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itsmelb · 8 months ago

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Sometimes, I wish I could watch my fav BLs for the first time again...just remember the moment when:

Porsche saved Kinn behind Hum Bar. He's wearing his old Chucks while Kinn is wearing my fav ombre suit. They ride the motorbike and Porsche aka Jom steals Kinns watch... epic.

Kim kills those mfers in the Bar while Chay plays the video game. After that Kim sits on the fire escape and smokes. Hot. Also the Wdys video sequence. Traumatised us all. Yah. Epic.

Vegas torturing that one gang member and puts on that cover suit thingy. His face is full of blood drops and he smiles. Shit went and will go down. This character will hunt me I swear.

Cher kneels in front of Boss Gun and asks him to be his faen. Boss kisses him enthusiastically on the cheeks and the mouth. I love my idiots sm.

Mew knows about Tops car adventure with Boston. But he seduces Top (like how hot is Book here omg) and the plays the audio. Omg. That was acting in its finest form!!

Pat and Pran stand on the room top and Pat tells Pran he can't be friends with him. They kiss so desperately I swear best roof top kiss in the history of Aofs roof top kisses. Wow. Speechless.

Mhok and Day are sitting between the mountains. Day looses his sight. They both cry because Mhok is the last image he saw.

Palm lost his mom. He and Nueng are in that shitty motel room. Palm is drunk and Nueng gave him some pills in his beer. They dance and kiss. Palm is sad and it's all so shitty. In that night Nueng leaves.

Gun and Tinn are backstage. Tinn cleans Guns face with the cotton pad (Nivea ad) and he tells him how good he has done the performances on stage. Gun nearly cries.

Zo opens the door again after he teased Joke. He pulls him in and they kiss like they're starving.

Alan and Jeff are rollerskating and Alan nearly falls. Jeff catches him. They talk. Alan gives him the bracelet with the A. He has the one with the J on and then they make love at home.

Charlie is dead. And Babe mourns. Oww. Pavel did so great.

Heart cries because his mother won't learn the sign language for him. Li Ming is there and holds him while he cries.

Wen and Jim kiss on the sofa. They are finally boyfriends after shit went down. Because Alan was still in love with Wen and Kaipa with Jim. Alan and Kaipa have a dinner at the chicken stall.

Prapai comforts Sky after he tells him about his traumatic experience. They are both crying.

Just to name a few 😉

#kinnporsche #kimchay #vegas theerapanyakul #guncher #topmew #patpran #mhokday #palmnueng #tinngun #jokezo #jimwen #alangaipa #alanjeff #charliebabe #heartliming #prapaisky #bl series #my personal rambles

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seahorsepencils · 5 months ago

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Hi! Would it be ok to ask whats going on with ppl being biphobic about kate stewart?/gen

I legitimately dont know whats going on? I feel like the pizza guy walking into the burning appt from community meme. Idk if i ever put much hc or thought behind kates relationships tbh, other than maybe she was aroacespec or choosing not to be in a relationship bec of how dangerous UNIT is...

I don't remember anything in the show implying she was sapphic or into Ibrahim (or like another person said in the tags that she had a kid with someone too)

I genuinely dont know wtf is going on or why who fans are fighting about this

Hi anon,

Of course! Thanks for asking. Here’s my attempt at an explanation:

In 2016, during a panel Q&A at Long Island Doctor Who, Jemma Redgrave said that when she first started doing the show, she headcanoned Kate as being married to a woman. At some point in her answer, she alludes to the fact that this may or may not be the case anymore, as she often learns new details about Kate’s life from the showrunners whenever she films another episode. (Jemma's answer starts at 44:54 here.)

Regardless, her initial headcanon has caught on, either as a bit of wishful thinking or as a detail that some perceive to be almost canon in the absence of contradictory evidence on the show or in other materials (i.e. the UNIT audios). In the series 18 episode “Death in Heaven,” Kate described herself as a “mother of two” and “divorcee,” and a popular interpretation of this is that Kate may have been married to a man, and divorced him after (or before) realizing she was a lesbian.

The “almost canon” perspective also holds a lot of weight among some fans of the show because of Jemma Redgrave’s long history of playing queer and queer-coded characters. Even her most ostensibly straight characters tend to offer some sort of challenge to compulsory heterosexuality or patriarchal norms (i.e. they turn to violence after spending years in loveless heterosexual marriages). This has made it very easy to headcanon pretty much any character she’s played as queer. I think some fans tend to also think that Jemma has more influence over her characters than she does - for example, after seeing episodes of DW in which Kate has worn plaid or flannel, fans have suggested that Jemma probably provided her own wardrobe for the show and purposely selected those items to give off gay vibes. (A very niche issue that has contributed to this is Jemma’s habit of repeatedly purchasing her characters’ wardrobe items at half price and then wearing them in real life - in the past, some fans incorrectly assumed that this meant Jemma was bringing her own clothing to set and asking the costume designers if Kate could wear it.) Effectively, many fans have hoped that Jemma’s earlier headcanon for Kate effectively manifested into canon over time, or potentially inspired the showrunners to agree that Kate is queer.

In terms of the Ibrahim stuff, the first piece was a lot of fans noticing that the hand-holding between Kate and Ibrahim in this week’s finale lasted a few seconds longer than one might expect a platonic hand-hold to last. Similarly, some have thought that the moment when she comes back to life and he pulls her up has a certain closeness or intimacy to it. From what I’ve seen, people are split on the topic - some people consider it to be a platonic “happy to be alive” moment, or a show of feelings from Ibrahim that Kate might not reciprocate; others have theorized that Ibrahim and Kate have a very close platonic relationship for some reason, etc.

Shortly after the finale aired, a version of the episode with a cast and crew audio commentary was released on the BBC’s website. In this commentary, while the two aforementioned scenes are playing, the producer, Vicki Delow, makes some comments suggesting she thinks that Kate and Ibrahim are, or should be, a couple. RTD responds to her comments in what sounds like a teasing tone. Here’s my transcript of those moments:

Helping Kate up scene (36:50) Vicki: “I love this. This is my favorite thing in the whole world." RTD: "What, these two?" Vicki: "These two. I just love them.” RTD: “What do you mean, Vicki?” Vicki: “I don’t know what you’re talking about.” RTD: “What do you mean? You think they’re friends?” Vicki: “I think they’re more than friends.”

Hand-holding scene outside (37:43) Vicki: “Look, look, look. This is it. Look, look, look.” RTD: “What are you looking at, Vicki Delow?” Vicki: “I love them. I love them.” RTD: “I don’t know what you mean, Vicki. I don't know.” Vicki: “It’s the greatest romance.”

Some folks have interpreted this as Vicki Delow hinting that there’s going to be a future romance between the characters in series 2 - and that RTD is egging her on - i.e. the “I don’t know what you mean” is a wink nudge way of him refusing to directly confirm a future storyline. That’s definitely a possibility. I think it’s also possible that Vicki just really wants them to be a couple, and has gotten a reputation on the production team as a hopeful shipper who wants Kate and Ibrahim to wind up together. In that context, RTD’s teasing her might have a vibe more like “oh Vicki, here you go again, shipping Kate and Ibrahim.”

So basically, a number of fans who have taken Jemma’s past headcanon as canon-adjacent have interpreted Vicki Delow’s “it’s the greatest romance” comment as confirmation that Kate and Ibrahim will have a romantic storyline in the next series, and have posted on social media (mostly Twitter, but a bit on Tumblr) criticizing what they perceive to be the show taking an unexpected position on Kate’s sexual orientation.

The rest might be stuff you’ve already seen, but I’ll summarize just in case: Several of the posts on Twitter and Tumblr have used language that inflexibly imply a gay/straight binary - i.e. “how dare they make Kate straight, she’s a lesbian” - not allowing for the possibility that she’s a bisexual woman to enter into the equation at all. In my other post on this subject I referred to a pattern of bi erasure and biphobia in the Jemma Redgrave fandom. As someone who’s an active member of that fandom, it felt like a concrete instance of some things I’ve seen pretty regularly in the community - and although I’m not as familiar with the DW fandom more generally, it sounds like there may have been some similar past instances of bi erasure or microaggressions in that fandom.

While I’ve categorized the “how dare they make her straight” posts specifically as bi erasure (and I imagine one could make a case that they’re biphobic too), the clear instance of biphobia for me has been in the comments I’ve seen by viewers who said that they would rather pretend Kate died at the start of the episode than accept the presence of a scene where she held hands with a man. In my mind, even as a joke, that seems to imply “better dead than bi or straight.”

I don't know if I'm decided on what Vicki Delow meant, and the lingering in that hand-holding moment definitely did make me wonder. And as someone who loves Jemma's performances as queer characters and has read my share of Osgate fic, I think it would be awesome to see her character in a relationship with a woman. But at this point I feel like the conversation has been so saturated by others' moments of bi erasure that it's hard to even know how to get back into it.

So, yeah. You're not wrong - even for someone who knows a lot of the pieces, it's been a very confusing couple of days. 😅

#kate stewart #doctor who #kate lethbridge stewart #queer stuff #bisexuality #jemma redgrave #fandom #dw spoilers #asks

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authortobenamedlater · 1 year ago

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My conclusions about Infinite, which I keep meaning to post and not posting:

Definitely more fun to play than Halo 4. But my old junky piano with a cracked soundboard was more fun to play than Halo 4.

For real, though, this was one of the more enjoyable games in terms of just playing for me. The grapple shot makes moving around and keeping up way easier and was handy when I ran out of ammo and needed to stun a few bad guys.

Jen Taylor should win an award for playing Cortana, Weapon, and Halsey in one game. I enjoyed Esparza’s Just Some Guy Forced To Rise To The Occasion vibe, though I do wonder why they were so cagey about his name until the final scene.

Infinite should have started with a doomed mission to defend Infinity so we can get an idea of just HOW BAD things have gotten. The last thing we saw was Lasky’s “we’ll run until we can fight” line at the end of Halo 5. Clearly they couldn’t fight, so let us see how desperate things are. Maybe drop some info about the general state of the universe after a year of Created rule. An explanation about how Infinity lost 11000 crew in one year (I have my Opinions about this number but this is not the place). I know things are rough under Cortana’s undid iridium fist but geez. Show us the Banished boarding and ripping through Infinity like she’s tinfoil. Bonus if we get Chief and Palmer both stopping Lasky from launching himself at Atriox. We all know this happened. Make us understand how Infinity fell in four minutes. THEN give us Atriox going Hulk on Chief’s Loki.

The game could be kind of…repetitive. The side quests were all pretty much the same: Liberate FOBs, find Spartan cores and audio logs, boss fights, assassination missions, take out propaganda tower. But it’s pretty. 4 was ugly and 5 was…alternately oddly dark and OK-looking.

I liked how Chief’s relationship with Weapon is sort of inverse to his relationship with Cortana. Cortana always knew more than the Chief, but in many ways Chief knows more than the Weapon. Like in CE it’s Cortana who tells Chief about Halo’s purpose and in Infinite Chief has to tell Weapon. And, Chief chooses the Weapon. Not the same way Cortana chose him, but he still chose her when she said “You should just delete me.” It’s a good way of doing the same thing over again without doing the same thing over again.

I wish the gameplay would pause during audio logs because they’re staticky to begin with and I only heard about half of the logs while I was fighting bad guys.

Big questions:

Palmer and Roland are conspicuous in their absence from any audio logs. Where are they?

I’ll ask again what will happen to the Weapon in seven years. I have ideas but just. Do not put us through another Halo 4. Please Microsoft.

All this Endless stuff makes me think we’re nowhere near done with the Master Chief’s story. Steve Downes is 73. I hate to be morbid but what are they going to do if he dies before the story is finished?

I don’t know what to think about Weapon naming herself Cortana. It makes sense and I’m not sure I want it. Also wouldn’t be surprised if that “I think I have the perfect name” line turns out to be a bait and switch since Microsoft has commitment issues when it comes to storytelling decisions.

How will those little time travel portals become important? Weapon didn’t talk about how they traveled three days into the future just for fun. Read on for my theory.

Are the Endless the new Flood?

Headcanons and such:

Esparza’s family is not gone. We’ll eventually find them and Chief will get adopted into the Esparza clan against his will.

Whenever the time comes Weapon will find a way to cure or delay rampancy. Or we’ll just exist in a 6.5 year time loop for the rest of the games. Because again, one Halo 4 is enough.

Infinity is either drifting aimlessly in space or crashed on Zeta Halo, but she will rise again.

Next game we’ll find a bunch of Infinity crew, notably Lasky, Palmer, and Roland, through one of those time travel portals. For them it’s only been a day or two and they’re all like “Wow, Chief, that was fast” and Chief has to tell them it’s really been more like two years. I have a fic idea or two about this.

#halo #halo infinite #authortobenamedlater plays halo

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northwest-cryptid · 1 year ago

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I found this image on my computer, which; without context is probably EXTREMELY confusing but it kills me every time I see it

I cannot tell you how badly I wish I could explain this game to you all, more specifically the adventure I went on with Chester but all I have left from the streams is this recap, which if you can forgive my god awful voice/audio summarizes exactly nothing everything and shows just how often my audience abuses the sound/music alerts video below the read more so it shouldn't randomly auto-play for anyone:

So, right off the bat horribly sorry for my god awful voice gracing your ears.

Other than that, for people who don't know; Kenshi is possibly my favorite open world sandbox game because it genuinely has so much to offer. It has no goals, it has no morality system nor does it try to tell you what is right and wrong. Kenshi just puts you in the world and asks you to survive however you want.

In the playthrough I'm doing on my streams I am playing as Chester, who's literally an old man who was a slave, escaped slavery, and lost all of his limbs; he has since been re-enslaved but broken out several times. I've decided that since he has been mistreated directly by slavers he would seek to rid the world of the two factions in the game that heavily support slavery, those being The Holy Nation (who are essentially a parody of Extremist Christians with their sexist and racist beliefs that anyone who isn't a Greenlander Male needs to be someone else's slave, or be killed) and The United Cities (who are basically Capitalism, I would say "Capitalism to the extreme" but no that's implied by saying Capitalism in the first place. Wealth is everything to them, how you get it doesn't matter; sell drugs, sell people; who cares as long as you make money in the end) as a result his journey has taken him all over the world.

Now normally in Kenshi you play as a group of characters you can set up a base somewhere, start up productions and do whatever. Kenshi is really well designed in that the world will come to you and happen at you but it will never treat you like anyone special even if you become a big shot. Taking out a few Holy Nation Paladins will get you a bad rep with the Holy Nation but no one is going to call you an Anti-Slaver hero, but if you take down Holy Lord Phoenix himself, you'll start to get a name for yourself both good and bad depending on who you ask. For every ally you make you make an enemy of someone else. If you build in bandit territory they will demand food to not launch raids, if you build in Shek lands they want their tribute for your colonization, if you build in the United Cities you better be ready to pay taxes. The world feels alive no matter how you play, and Chester is something of a nomad who just wants to explore the world and have one last adventure while leaving the wastelands a more peaceful place than he came into it as.

My current playthrough off stream is actually 100% different, I'm a lone barkeeper who set up shop in one of the towns of the United Cities, I would buy slaves and release them if they chose to stay with me I'd give them a job working at my pub. I was literally just a humble barkeep. Eventually I had the whole situation automated, we have robots manning everything, one running well water to the farmer, one working the farms harvesting crops and turning them into usable ingredients, another taking the ingredients and preparing food, another running that food to the front desk for sales, it was an elaborate and beautiful pipeline delivering grog, sake, and plenty of rice to the fine people of Stoat while simultaneously ridding the UC (United Cities) of their slaves, with the money lining my pockets it wasn't hard to buy out every slave shop I came across, and just release the slaves.

Oh yea and I have modded the game to all hell without a care as to what I was actually modding in, which means everything from vroid models to dinosaurs to uh... warframe grineer? For some reason?

So my playthrough kinda looks like this:

I kinda want to run you through this playthrough in hopes it will share some of why I love Kenshi with you. See the stats in this game are brutal and they only get better by being used. If you want to get tougher you need to be beaten, if you want to run faster you need to travel, if you want to make better clothing you need to do a lot of crafting. So with only 6 Athletics (which is nothing) and a dream, I took off to go get my Skeleton crew (Skeletons are the name for robots in this game) which are out in the Black Desert which suffers from constant acid rain and lightning storms... which are a slight problem, however that's not as much of a problem when I didn't even make it 5 minutes out the door before some bandits launched an assault on me because I happened to have a loaf of bread in my pocket, yea this game is UNFAIR and it's great but we'll get to why later.

^ See this in the bottom left? Those are your health bars, you don't get HP in this game you get values for your limbs. Your VITAL limbs are things like your head, chest, stomach, and obviously blood. The higher your toughness stat the lower those can go before you fall unconscious/die. However you can entirely lose arms and legs and still be okay, you can even craft your own limbs (or steal them in the case of Chester :P) to replace them, and in a lot of cases limbs are a trade off, maybe you're really strong but that strength means you don't have good finger dexterity so you can't pick locks or steal very well but you can bust open a door or hit someone really hard, scout legs for example give you a ton of movement speed as they're basically springs on your feet, but they don't have a lot of health value so if you get hit in the leg you're probably going down quick, not to mention you can't swim very well with large pieces of metal for legs. These trade offs are really fun and the way health values work in this game is something I hated at first but came to love as I played more.

Everything you survive in Kenshi literally makes you stronger, it's that age old saying "what doesn't kill you makes you stronger" yea it's that cranked up to 11, because wouldn't you know it after hiring some robots at a pub (they can only drink grog because it's basically oil to them, and yes they have oil not blood as a stat; man the devs really put so much detail into this game it's so cute) I got struck by lightning and left out in acid rain... with literally no protection from it.

However if you notice most of my stats are in the green minus stomach and chest... and my left arm but my VITALS are doing better because I already took a beating getting here, and I got tougher for it! God I love that shit so much it's such a cool concept because it means you organically grow over the course of the game!

So anyways we get back to Stoat eventually (I had to get one of the robots to carry me) and we begin to properly set up shop, it's real cozy since there's no real conflict and I have plenty of money (called Cats) to spend on resources right now

I even started making and selling weapons and stuff! I eventually had enough money I bought ANOTHER building and decided to turn this one into a big farm, we'd use moister farming to condense water in the air since we're in the middle of the desert and wells out here kinda suck for consistent water supply, we'll continue the use of hydroponic farming and start bread production from grain silos, yes all of this shit matters; Kenshi is a complex game with lots of moving parts, I mean hell there's a whole graph for making robotic limbs and it's fantastic, you have to know what to make at what crafting station and where it all needs to go, and what research you need to do to unlock it all. This game makes you work for your reward and then properly gives you a fitting reward when you can make shit like this:

This whole thing is a blueprint that contains 3 different types of farms (Vegetables, Rice, and Wheat) a grain silo to turn the wheat to flour, then an oven for baking that flour to bread, as well as Grog, Rum, and Sake distilleries, storage for it all, as well as 4 stoves all set to make various foods from the farms, the floor above this houses 6 water condensers that will generate passive water for us so the farms won't dry out, and you know what? This all pays off, we make literally over 100k just selling various foods and drink that cost nothing for us to make since we can now grow it all in house!

Just to give you an idea, there was a moment like this for Chester too, except Chester's moment was when he tracked down a tyrannical Skeleton warlord who had been literally making skeletons go haywire so he could have an army to commit genocide on anyone and everyone, Chester couldn't fight through the literal hundreds of thralled skeletons so instead we used stealth which we had been training for a good while now; and snuck into his throne room before carefully sneaking up and assassinating him. It turns out he has one of the strongest weapons in the game, something called a "Meitou Falling Sun" which is actually really important because the "Meitou" in that name is the weapon's grade, Meitou is a grade only given to 1 of each class of weapon, forged by an ancient blacksmith named Cross who was renowned as a legendary blacksmith who made top tier weapons. Now the Falling Sun is still WAY too heavy for Chester to use properly, but he was able to grab the warlord and turn him in to an anti-slaver group for a bounty, fun fact about that the anti-slaver group is ran by another Skeleton who used to be friends with said warlord but didn't agree with his system of going to war, and instead became an anti-slaver gigachad who doesn't even fight with a weapon.

Notice how in my Barkeeper run my big moment was automating a farm + kitchen combo and decorating my bar to be nice and fancy; but for Chester it was basically an elaborate stealth mission to assassinate/Stealth KO a warlord and change the global politics of the game entirely? Yea that's the freedom this game gives you, you will get these big rewarding moments no matter how you play. In one of my playthroughs that rewarding moment was hunting down a slaver group who had taken one of my characters and enslaved them, I broke everyone out of the camp including my old team member and despite effectively only getting back to square 1 (having both my party members in the party again) it felt super cool and rewarding to break them out of this elaborate slave prison and set everyone free to help me fight off the guards, because my whole playthrough changed when they got captured, suddenly I cared a lot more about lock picking and stealth and everything else took a backseat, I joined a group of ninjas and had them train me so I could sneak in and pick all the locks before opening all the cages and arming all the slaves with weapons from the storage rooms. Kenshi is an entirely unique experience every playthrough and speaking of playthroughs after I upgraded my bar I decided to take a little vacation out of the desert to go pick up some more friends, this time I figured I'd get some fleshy new hires since I want to diversify a little bit. While I was out, this Beak Thing (large carnivore creatures who when the game was released, could accidentally talk and would absolutely destroy you before saying "relax, enjoy death" which is the most terrifying shit) got stuck in our grog room

But he's still only a pup so we can't legally give him any alcohol, don't worry; he still hasn't left and he's now an Elder. I am trying to find the guy who will sell him to me because he's become something of a mascot for the bar. He also doesn't fit anymore...

So you may be wondering if there's plot or anything and well, there kinda is; and it's super organic and I love it to death. Okay so let's back up, now that I have an automated system I've begun going town to town and buying a bar in each major town in the UC this allows me to make money in town and then buy out the slave market freeing any slaves and hiring any who want to stick around giving them a weapon more powerful than a sword in the UC; money. In doing so I wound up in a coastal town called Bark where I was approached by a young woman and this dialogue happend:

It's a little hard to read but I'll summarize if you're not able to read it; essentially she asks if I'm from around here and when I ask if there's a problem by any chance she tells me she somehow fucked up with nobility, which in the UC is a big deal; like a "they will kill you" big deal. She tells me she NEEDS to get out of town, so I ask her what she was involved in; remember that if I get a bad rep with the UC my bars will be raided, all the slaves I have employed will be killed, I won't be able to fight the system so for now I have to play nice and that means I can't be helping anyone out if it costs me my own skin; plus I'm not some super strong anime protagonist, I'm a fucking barkeeper! I have no stats for fighting at this point and can't very well go to war with the UC over one person as much as I may want to help everyone. She tells me it's all a conspiracy and someone ratted her out, she needs to be gone by the morning so I tell her I'll see what I can do; yes you can actually disguise people and sneak them over boarders in this game it's incredible. However she tells me she only needs about 3k to bribe the guards to look the other way, 3k is pretty much nothing to me at this point so I say sure. After which point she joins our squad, I am then approached by another young lady looking to join up and get out of town; sounds good to me but I kinda need people here to run the shop in this town so I attempted to have a bit of dialogue to figure out why she wanted out so bad;

But she's an absolute riot, she tells me she has a pet Gutter (a species of Beak Thing) named Grimes and how she apparently has had a steamy affair with the barman's daughter and then even goes so far as to try to show me her weird rash but I figured we knew enough and you know we stan a lesbian with a weird rash.

But I couldn't just leave them here if they weren't well protected; so I set up a small fishing camp, and taught them how to farm, I even bought them a house and made good sure Khida was safe to leave town if needed.

I even installed a little Gutter weathervane for Ojillo on their farm

This game just has so much charm! Though I really need to get these two some clothes, most characters spawn with pants but not shirts; but the game is never weird about it so meh I'll pick them up some leather jackets from the shop down the road from my pub.

Now remember how I said I'm physically pretty weak? And how I can't really fight yet? Well to fix that I went ahead and used the skills I do have (in crafting) to make myself some martial arts gear, in this case this absolute insanely modded mess of a game showed me I could make Goku's gi and you know I have never seen Dragon Ball but that wasn't going to stop me, I even found a guy selling some weird robotic enhancements and bought that to go with it.

I essentially waited around at the gates of Stoat for wildlife, bandits, or threats of any nature to attack the town and when the guards would get involved I'd just back them up, it was pretty safe and if I was knocked out I had my pub staff nearby with medkits to pick me up and haul my ass back to bed. After a LONG time of this I was finally skilled enough at dodging, tough enough to take hits when I couldn't dodge, and actually skilled enough with martial arts; to explore the wilds out by where Beak Things live, I was hoping to get some beak thing eggs since they sell for a good price and I could use them in cooking some really nice stuff to sell at my pub, would absolutely bring in higher paying clientele and I'm all about that.

Oh and while I was doing all of this, the rest of the world was still actively going on around me, remember how I said I was freeing slaves? They were starting to take notice of this, and one of my ex-slave employee's Frump went by the slave yard to free some more people when this really wholesome interaction happened:

Kenshi really does a great job of making the world feel like it's happening around you but at the same time, taking notice of you. I love stuff like this, it's genuinely cool to see slaves notice my faction and know they have a chance of escaping because I set slaves free; and yet they don't immediately trust me just off my reputation because that's the kind of world Kenshi is, it's a world where for all they know I "free" slaves and then shoot them for sport, or feed them to my pet dinosaur for fun. Oh yeah my pet dinosaur, about that.

So remember how I said I was going to go get beak thing eggs for profit and money? I found a Western Tyrant instead, or at least a Juvenile one; a quick fight later and it was knocked out, I patched it up and dragged it's ass back to my house in The Hub where I was greeted by none other than Elma from Xenoblade Chronicles X and 2b from NieR; why? Because MODS BAY-BEE WOOOO!

ANYWAYS we put it in a cage so it can't kill us and we feed it until it trusts us, we name it Gura because it will become an Apex Predator, and now we are best friends :D

Look at it! I love this thing! It's so cute! It's still a baby so I have to be careful not to let it get into fights with things that could easily kill it but it's a tanky beast and I'm keeping it safe. Well...

OKAY LISTEN IT'S OKAY! THE RAGDOLL PHYSICS ARE JUST HILARIOUSLY WEIRD IN THIS GAME BUT I PROMISE IT'S OKAY!

On my way back to Stoat I found a group of nomads who were also traveling with animals and I decided to follow them, strength in numbers and all that; we're all friends here.

This game is honestly beautiful to me even on low settings; I love looking up from the desert wasteland and seeing huge planets floating over the horizon it really sells me on the scale of this world.

Eventually we got to a town where I hadn't had a chance to set up a shop, the Nomads just brought me to an entirely new place; so I ran by the local bar to pick up a new hire and well, interview went great!

I literally asked if they had any potential skills they said no, and I hired them on the spot!

Oh yea I also found a guy getting chased around by a "processor unit" which are basically robotic vulture raptors that eat dying things; he was beat up pretty bad in a fight and woke up from his recovery coma because the unit was eating his flesh, and then the pathfinding decided he should RUN IN CIRCLES

So I see this looney tunes bullshit off in the distance while I'm traveling; gotta love it. Good luck dude! Some say he's still out there running in circles to this day.

This happened by the way because he was trying to attack the unit, and the unit was trying to attack him and the pathfinding wouldn't just let him turn around, and dear lord it was hilarious.

I was also laughing really hard because I sent my friends THIS picture which looks like the most generic youtube clickbait thumbnail, but was meant to express how much hell I was going through trying to transport all my goods over to the next town which was so heavy I couldn't move faster than 4 mph but of course there were a ton of things in the desert at this exact time of day, that want me dead:

I guess what I'm trying to say with this extremely long rambling, is that I genuinely love Kenshi for how much love and care and soul it has. Every character I encounter has a story, something to say, something to do. I wander into a town and someone tells me about this legend they heard and they want to join me to go hunt down some treasure somewhere, or I'll stumble into a pirate town where anyone who doesn't know the pirate code is immediately taken in to become a slave and work your way up through the ranks because you're an obvious outsider; but you can buy a pirate code book off a drunk guy super cheap at a bar and then pretend to know enough to not get caught. Sometimes I'm running through a place just for travel and stumble upon "Skin Bandits" who are Skeletons who think they're human, and they're all friends with a human who's their leader; and made them "peeler machines" to peel the flesh off their "flesh brothers" and wear the skin as a suit; genuine horror shit right there and I love it. Kenshi has so much packed into it, you could be a leviathan hunter seeking riches from battling behemoths that roam the land, or you could be a barkeeper who just wants to settle down in a quiet town and run a shop, or you could be an anti-slaver and free the oppressed people of the world; and hell there's nothing saying you have to play this way. If you prefer to be a morally bad person in games you can join the Holy Nation, you can become a slave trader; you can steal and kill to your hearts content because the game will never point a finger at you and say "you're being morally bad and mean and rude!" Instead you are chased down by the police, you might have to break out of jail, you might have to fight and die to get out of prison or to get away because you may get caught trying to rob people. Kenshi is immersive because it never tells you "no" outright, it plays like a huge game of D&D where everything is fair to the point of being brutal and unfair. Like the game doesn't deem you anyone important, you're just another person; so every choice you make matters but not in some grand scheme kind of way.

And what's really cool about it is, if you do want to be some important person, you can do that too! If you take out a big political name, someone else will make moves to take their place; other factions will move into the land and take up residency and you can sway how the game map will turn out. You can help the Shek reclaim their land, you can help the Holy Nation colonize everything, you can help the United Cities get even richer, or you can hang out in the swamps with the turtles; they're cute as fuck dude I love those little guys.

Yes the game is buggy, and yes you should probably mod the fuck out of it because there's a ton of ways to cheese it and honestly sometimes a bit of quality of life mods can go a long ways toward making a game more fun.

But I ultimately think this game deserves a look if you're into these sort of genres; explore the world, see what it has to offer; and just have fun with it. If you're curious and don't wanna play it yourself you're always welcome to check out my streams, Chester's quest to get all his stats to 100 is about to start back up again, we still need to put an end to the Holy Nation and make Chester the gigachad he deserves to be; so if you can handle my absolutely aggravating voice come hang out if you feel inclined.

Anyhow thanks for reading all of this, hope you enjoyed it; I could gush about Kenshi and it's little details all day but I'll spare you since this post is long enough as it is.

#long post sorry #oh god theres a really dumb 6 minute video under the cut #and you can hear my dumbass voice sorry about that lol #i love this dumb game so much

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void-star · 2 years ago

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I posted 6,945 times in 2022

That's 317 more posts than 2021!

441 posts created (6%)

6,504 posts reblogged (94%)

Blogs I reblogged the most:

@perfect-cecilos

@blue-eyes-white-privilege69

@bugssiesbeans

@thisautistic

@closet-keys

I tagged 3,745 of my posts in 2022

Only 46% of my posts had no tags

#wtnv - 306 posts

#pretty art - 199 posts

#dragon age - 170 posts

#malevolent - 167 posts

#amc iwtv - 138 posts

#ofmd - 116 posts

#hfth - 114 posts

#spoilers - 94 posts

#toh - 88 posts

#good fucking content - 88 posts

Longest Tag: 139 characters

#another friend of mine started listening to night vale bc she needed something for her commute and because it gave us a reason to talk more

My Top Posts in 2022:

It isn't until Change of Mind that you really realize just how short staffed Minkowski's mission was.

80 notes - Posted June 5, 2022

I listened to Memoria this morning while getting ready for work which was a terrible decision cause it's difficult to put make up on while you're crying.

I just want to say the idea of Pryce inputting a core thought meant to tear Hera down, that runs every time she does anything, and the idea of "giving them my own voice" so the thought is indistinguishable from her own, really fuckin hits me in the mommy issues.

I think one of the coolest things they did with Hera as an A.I. was to create a computer metaphor for some aspects of human psychology; that a self-defeating thought is implanted in someone by another person that occurs at runtime every time.

That a small, single line of "code" recited subconsciously before every thing we do effects our whole systems.

That we need to know it's there to cope and work around it.

It's just very, very good. I like it a lot.

82 notes - Posted May 30, 2022

Wolf 359 is just so good I will never be over it. That whole sequence at the end of episode 28 when they've just pulled the Hephaestus station into a stable orbit, Eiffel is in Lovelace's shuttle detached from the station and drifting very slowly, and he convenes with Minkowski in the medical lab where he gets suddenly interrupted by Lovelace flatlining?

And after a moment of the drama of trying to get Lovelace's heart beating again, the last thing we hear from him is, "Diiiiiiiiid....... was thaaaaaaaaat......??" and then the shuttle explodes?

Just amazing.

I love the flow of the scene and the tension. I love the voice acting. I love that we're hit with two more crises while still exhausted from the cost of narrowly escaping the last one. It's a bunch of emotional beats all in a row.

I literally dream of being this good at writing.

92 notes - Posted May 14, 2022

I’m 25 episodes into Hello from the Hallowoods and I have decided I really like it. Here are some reasons why:

Lots of queer characters at lots of different ages and lots of different stages.

Some of the older characters are just beginning to engage with their queerness and it’s so sweet.

An asexual character!

I appreciate that the writer just threw in anything that seemed fun to them. Eldritch deities? Demons? Spirits? Doll zombies? Punk rock stars? Elemental mages? Capitalism trying to persevere after the apocalypse? Evangelism? All yes, and that’s goals tbh. I wish I could capture that energy.

Consistently the best openers I’ve ever heard.

Fuck, even the eldritch narrator is queer.

The particular way that death shows up as a theme here is really interesting. Death as a lingering consciousness, or a continuation, rather than an emptiness or an end.

Even though they’re mostly all the same voice actor and it’s basically the narrator reading a story to you, there are distinct enough voices for most of the characters that you can tell who is who even without the cues.

My fave audio drama villain archetype, the creepy evil boss, literally thinks she can take on an eldritch god and win. I’m so, so into it.

Water as giving life... especially after death.

Ahhh I recommend giving it a try if you like audio dramas.

104 notes - Posted January 11, 2022

My #1 post of 2022

Cutter's "recruitment" of Eiffel is such an interesting interaction because until this point, with the exception of Hera, everyone else's sign on has not been so deeply resisted.

Hera AND Eiffel are not thrilled to take Cutter's deal, in fact they really have no other choice.

But Eiffel's scene is the first time we've ever heard Cutter struggle to control someone. He doesn't have the same tools he had with Hera.

It's the first time we hear someone laugh at Cutter, set a hard boundary with him, and literally call him a motherfucker to his face!

I'm also trying to think if anyone else aside from Hera ever really caught on to Cutter. Eiffel literally likens him to Patrick Bateman (American Psycho).

And I really feel like Cutter's agitation is palpable in his silence before he cuts Eiffel off with, "okay, okay! before you say any more things I'm going to make you regret..."

Like, Cutter still successfully lands the hook by making promises about what Goddard can do about supporting his daughter, but THAT MOMENT OF PEAK TENSION!!!!!! And only after Eiffel has been bought into it does he fall in line with the hierarchy and switch to calling Cutter, "sir."

111 notes - Posted May 25, 2022

Get your Tumblr 2022 Year in Review →

#tumblr2022 #year in review #my 2022 tumblr year in review #your tumblr year in review #thank you wolf 359 and hfth people for liking the bullshit i say

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cozywithjoy · 8 months ago

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Joy's Cozy Week

4.1.2024-4.7.2024

This is Joy's weekly schedule of live streams and content.

Monday, April 1, 2024 6:00 PM [Twitch] - Hot Cocoa Time with Joy

Let's welcome the new month together! I have a new outfit, some updates to share, and just love a chance to talk with YOU! Also, April 1st is known as April Fools Day (aka National Tom Foolery Day) in America; but, I won't be participating in that. I will be holding a cozy safe space for anyone wishing for it. So grab your blankie, hot cocoa (or whatever beverage you prefer), and join me in my cozy space.

Tuesday, April 2, 2024 9:00 AM [TikTok] - Cozy Gaming

I have tried TikTok streaming before, but I had to take a break during the holidays and also my PC could barely handle it along with Twitch Streaming. With my new PC setup, I'm giving it a go once again. So, I'm trialing TikTok streaming, and I'd love to see you there as well! I haven't decided what game yet, but I'm putting more of a focus on cozy/farming sim games on this platform, and I'll see where it takes me.

Wednesday, April 3, 2024 9:00 AM [TikTok] - Cozy Co-Working

If anyone still remembers a time when I was doing "study with me" streams on Youtube, these streams acted as "parallel working" streams, where I put in some video game lofi, no mic, and worked alongside friends while interacting directly in chat. I had to put a pause on these streams due to holidays, work, special streams, etc. And after re-evaluating myself and looking back on those streams, I didn't want to limit it to just "studying." So, as part of experimental TikTok streaming, I'll be streaming "co-working" sessions on TikTok, where pomodoro will also be tried out and I'll interact a little more freely there than I did on Youtube. Looking forward to seeing you!

Thursday, April 4, 2024 6:00 PM [Twitch] - Persona 3 Reload

Ah, something still familiar in the schedule! My regularly scheduled Persona/RPG thursdays is still ongoing! So much story to uncover in this next stream, and AHHH, I can't say more than that just for the sake of spoiling others. But for those who are familiar, we're about to hit September...

Friday, April 5, 2024 4:00 PM [Youtube] - New Video to be released!

Speaking of Youtube, I had to put a hiatus on my YT projects due to the holidays, work piling up, and all the support for the friends during these last few months. I'm tackling my content again to post on Youtube more often! I enjoyed making gaming asmr videos and productivity videos. I'll be focusing more on gaming content, and just see where life takes me after sometime~ So, look forward to anticipated weekly YT videos of yours truly~! \ This week's video is a Play with Me, Genshin video :) no mic, just highlighting game controller and in-game audio sounds. "Don't forget to like, subscribe, comment and hit that notifications bell!"

tiktok twitch youtube instagram twitter

you are enough, just as you are. have a cozy timezone <3

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masterzmei · 9 months ago

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His eyes narrow momentarily, before taking a moment to look away and thank the staff politely before they are dismissed. Looking back to Charlotte, he gives a firm handshake that he hopes shows off just how rough and torn up his hands have been, and that he is likely one of very few people in this building that can easily tell the way a trained fighter evaluates a new person and their potential weaknesses. "My pleasure, Zmei Lazarevich with the Guardian." Zmei shrugs off her question about his knee with a wary smile, but settled a little more weight onto his cane as soon as she said something. "It's not so terrible, just an old wrestling thing. Never tapped once, even in the match that ended my career. What I wouldn't give for 15 more years..." He laughs, a little more ease in his shoulders after watching her forget herself and threaten to kill him for it. "If it is not written down or recorded I can promise will not remember it when it comes time to write, but you are welcome to try." He nods, moving back to his small set up and sitting back down, but never quite turning his back to her. "Of course, but this was all a bit last minute so a couple small things... Do you consent to being recorded for audio or video? They'd only be seen by me and potentially an editor, and can either be archived or deleted at your request." He pauses a second, looking back over his notes and the frankly too many questions he had prepared. "Also, before we start, are there any topic you'd either like to speak to or have avoided? I don't want to put you in a bad mind before a show, and I do not want you to leave wishing you could have had something published."

She could kill her director for springing this on her without warning, even half plotting with Ansel until the man apologizes – with flowers. Lottie spent lots of time getting the artistic director to where they were, where he could read her moods and act accordingly, so she didn’t really have the time or energy to start fresh. Besides – Lottie loves talking about herself, so perhaps it's not the worst thing to spend a bit of her afternoon with some random sports writer.

Still, her pre-show rituals are well established and crucial, so she meets him in one of the spare dressing rooms – not hers, that’s a sacred space. But something like neutral ground. Lottie arrives in a flurry of movement, garment rack and her various bags carried by staff, who she dismisses with a wave of her hand, setting the delicate hairpiece on the vanity herself.

“Thank you,” a gracious smile as she takes the offered hand. “Charlotte Astor.” She noticed his limp when she walked in, the instincts of a trained killer combine with one who’s spent her entire life shaping her body to her whims. “Your knee? Company doctors say I’ve got 15 more years on mine, 20 if I’m lucky and slow down.” She gives him a half smile, then realizes what she’s said and her eyes narrow. “Publish any of that and I’ll have you killed.” It's said with such seething sweetness she’s sure he thinks she’s joking. “Besides, the company doctors are worthless anyway.” She sits down and starts to pull out her makeup. “You have questions?”

#sports column | writing #with: charlotte

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zhongrin · 2 years ago

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behind the screen

◇ characters ◇ zhongli

◇ tags ◇ yandere, sagau

◇ a/n ◇ ok ok ok story time liSTEN-

i was showing a friend genshin for the first time few weekends ago, and ofc i had zhongli out (she wasn't interested in him tho, sad) to walk around and basically show her around the world. and then we stopped a bit while i explained the whole thing about the usual party composition & the concept of gacha, and ofc zhongli starts talking about osmanthus wine-

so i rolled my eyes (cause i was in the middle of an explanation) and said "zhongli shush" and you know what happened? he. fucking. stopped. talking. the idle animation canceled. i almost pissed myself until i remembered the controller was in my friend's hand and she had moved the joystick. THAT ALMOST SCARED ME TO DEATH SLFJSLJFLS LMAO

so yeah have a drabble 'inspired' by that. toodles~

𝑚𝑎𝑠𝑡𝑒𝑟𝑙𝑖𝑠𝑡 ⬙ 𝑡𝑎𝑔𝑙𝑖𝑠𝑡

he knows you love his voice.

it's something you always tell him, both directly and indirectly. you would drop in his voiceover menu every now and then, purposefully put him on idle so you can listen to his musings, and whenever he appears on scenes you would visibly deflate if the dialogues involving him are muted from your side. at such times, he takes one step closer to the idea of breaking this world's laws entirely, because if you wish to hear him then you should be able to - you should always get whatever you want, the deity that you are in his eyes.

like now, when you're gushing about him to what seems to be your friend. he's never heard of her before, but you seem close, and he feels the familiar twitch of his fingers, itching to reach out to you, to pull you close and smother you with his presence instead.

from the way you had to explain the basics of his world, he assumes your friend is a complete beginner entirely. but surprisingly she doesn't seem to be too impressed with him, despite the excitement that's filling your voice, and he can sense how agitated it made you. true enough, when he stealthily sneaks a glance, you're pouting a little before you launch into an explanation of how necessary of an addition he is to the team, and the workings behind the gacha system.

adorable.

... but your attention is slipping away from him. now that- he can't have that. he sighs and triggers the idle function with your favorite audio file that he frequently abuses, feeling his body and lips move as per the scripted codes.

"osmanthus wine-"

"zhongli, shush!"

...... what?

it was a reflex. a force of habit, you could say. no one likes to be talked over by someone else when they're talking, right?

"sorry, he's a little-"

you stop talking because suddenly, it's silent. the hair on the back of your neck rises.

"did you move the joystick?" you ask your friend, eyeing the now-still 3d model of your favorite character on the big tv screen.

"huh? no?" she answered, waving the gadget by its handle with one hand, "uh- didn't you say it has drifting problems? maybe it's that?"

".... yeah........ yeah, that's got to be it. anyway, as i was saying-"

zhongli is needlessly quiet for the rest of your little showcase. you continue to talk with your friend happily, the little event pushed to the back of your mind as you enjoy spending time with one of your favorite people, throwing jokes, laughs, and eventually turning off genshin to move on to celebrity crushes and a cute looking singer that's going to have his little concert in the city soon.

zhongli lets you.

for it would be the last time you could enjoy the such activity before he forcefully pulls you into their side.

to his side, where you rightfully belong to.

ps. if you want to be removed/added from the taglist, just send an ask!

#genshin impact #genshin x reader #genshin impact x reader #zhongli #zhongli x reader #yandere #sagau #rin writes

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papiliomame · 2 years ago

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Ectoberhaunt22 Day 12: Cause of Death

A fresh young corpse lies in the mortuary of Amity Park. The experienced mortician wants to do their best to give this body a proper goodbye in his full beauty. But strange occurences seem to hinder the work...

Video under the cut:

Contains jumpscares and unnatural movments!

This was inspired by the games "Mortuary Assisant" and "P.T." (RIP best horror game I can never play again) and other modern ghost horror games. Also inspired by the trope that ghosts always re-experience their death again and again in one form or another. For this animation I made three scenes to show this:

1st scene: Danny's photo before he went into the portaltunnel 2nd scene: The hallway mimics the walk into the portaltunnel 3rd scene: I think this is pretty self-explanatory

This should actually be a a whole short film with a proper buildup and story but that was probably too ambitious for what I can do within a week. Nevertheless, I hope you can enyoy this.

Also I wish I could put some audio in this but I have no idea about audio design and good audio design is a really big part to build a good horror atmosphere. I think it's better to keep it silent than destroying the atmosphere with a sad attempt of mine. ( Ok the very last part is more funny than anything but I wanted to lift the mood at the end)

#ectoberhaunt22 #eh chaos #day12 #cause of death #3d animation #animation video #danny phantom #fan animation #fan art #my animation #myart #mortuary #cw jumpscare #cw unnatural movements #blender #creepy!danny #my art

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wasdaya · 2 years ago

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HATING GAME | steve harrington

+ steve harrington x henderson!reader

summary: it's already something definite that you hate steve harrington and steve harrington hates you. but when dustin accidentally discovered a russian code you and steve were forced to work together

warnings: a lot of swearing + dustin being a dad

word count: 5.2k

a/n: this is total enemies to lovers and is inspired by the book the hating game | masterlist here.

Y/F/I = your favorite ice cream flavor | I/F/H = the ice cream flavor you hate

THERE IS A THEORY: hating and loving someone are strangely similar. Love and hate are visceral. Just thinking about that person makes your stomach turn. In the chest, the heart beats fast. Your appetite and sleep are compromised. Every time that person appears in front of you you feel the air leave your lungs, the environment gets smaller and warmer.

Love and hate are scattered versions of the same game - and you have to win.

That's how you felt about Steve Harrington and that's how Steve Harrington felt about you.

Ever since last year, when you had to live with Steve briefly because Dustin had lost his gooey bug Dart, caused a demogorgon disaster and that weird shit, you've been more angry than anything.

You didn't have a complete reason to hate Steve. Maybe you hated him because he's just an idiot. Or maybe because he talked a lot of shit to Jonathan. The point is: who cares? You hate him just as he hates you.

Right now, you're focused on the big reflection in front of the Scoops Ahoy cashier. You lift your hand, smooth your hair, and smooth your clothes.

On the other side of the ice cream shop, Steve rolls his eyes as he puts the ice cream in a cone for the customer in front of him.

You wish could say Steve is ugly. Steve should have a hunchback, dirty teeth and sweat that reeks of onions. But he is not like that. He is the exact opposite.

When you get in line at the ice cream shop, ready to get your ice cream and start your hate game with Steve.

“What is it, Y/N? Want your favorite flavor? I/F/H?”

Everyone knows you hate this flavor. You get to clench your jaw and saw your teeth.

"No." You let a gust of the equivalent of half a liter of cooking gas escape your lungs. “I want Y/F/I, Harrington.”

He takes the ice cream as gently and slowly as possible without breaking eye contact with you.

Did you happen to notice that he now had a plaque on his uniform stating his name: “Steve.”

“Now you have a license plate, hmm?” You tease.

"You pay too much attention on me, shortcake."

"Stop calling me shortcake or i’ll report you to your boss for teasing a customer."

"That's not against the rules, Y/N."

The only thing that is always capable of ruining the games between you and Steve is your brother, Dustin. Just like he's interrupting you right now.

“Steve! Y/N!” He yells as he walks into the ice cream shop. “I need to talk to you two. Urgently.”

“What is it now, Henderson?” Steve complains as he walks into the back room of the ice cream shop with you.

"Well, last night I was trying to get in touch with Suzie and-"

“Your fake girlfriend?” You tease.

“Y/N!” Dustin rolls his eyes before continuing: “And i intercepted a secret communication from the Russians.”

"YOU WHAT?" You scream - maybe too loud.

“Wait, and what does that mean?” Steve asks.

“It means, Steve, that we can be heroes. Great American heroes.” Your brother responds.

"No! It means, Steve, that you're not going to do anything! Because we're talking about Russians! Fucking Russians!” You say.

“American Heroes.” Steve continues, seeming to totally ignore what you just said.

“Just think, you can get all the girls you want and more.”

“Always about the girls.” You whisper to yourself as you throw your hands up.

"Well, we just have to figure out the audio." Dustin says and plays the Russian audio.

"I will not do it. And neither do you.” You scold.

"Come on, shortcake, stop being boring just once in your life."

Now, you, Steve and Dustin were almost 2 hours trying to figure out what the damn audio was talking about. So far the only progress you guys had made was finding some vague lyrics and translations. Just it.

"So what do you guys think?"

"Sounds familiar..." Steve says as he paces around munching on the tenth banana of the day.

“What sounds familiar, Harrington?” You ask tired.

"The music. The music there at the end.” He responds by licking his fingers.

“Why are you listening to the song, Steve? It's to listen to Russian. We are translating Russian!” Your brother almost scream.

"I'm trying to listen to Russian, but there's this song-"

"Enough. My shift is over.” Robin, a girl who worked at the ice cream shop along with Steve enters the room. "Hey! My frame. It was important.”

“I assure you that what we are doing is much more important.” Dustin assures.

“Yeah? And how do you know what the Russians are up to, huh?”

“How does she know about the Russians?” Dustin whispers with a look of amazement at you. “Did you tell her, Steve?” Dustin says turning to the brunette next to you.

"No! I didn-"

"Hello? I can hear you. In fact, I can hear absolutely everything. You think you've caught these evil Russians plotting against our country on this tape and you're trying to translate, but you didn't understand a single word. It's not that?"

The two boys seem too shocked to answer the question, so you intervene.

"Yeah. Can you help us?"

"Maybe. I am fluent in four languages and one of them is Russian.”

“Um… I think we should-“

"Ok. Steve will sell the ice cream with the help of Y/N and Robin and I will translate.” Dustin says, not even giving you and Steve a chance to object. "You two, go." He orders as he points to the door.

"Son of a bitch. You will pay for it.” You whisper in your brother's ear as you pass him.

A few minutes had passed since Steve had started selling the ice creams - or rather, flirting terribly with girls.

"You suck at this." You say from above the counter.

“In selling the ice cream. Yeah, imagine having to stay-"

"No. In flirting. It's embarrassing, Harrington."

"I don't give a damn what you think, i just want normal girls to like me."

“You are chronically addicted to making people like you. You should try not to care so much sometimes, King Steve.”

"No one calls me that any more and i didn't ask for any advice from you, Henderson."

“You should ask more often. I'm sure your life would be much better.” You huff before continuing, “I don't even know why im arguing with you. I get annoyed with myself when i allow you to drag me down to your level all the time!”

“And at what level do you imagine me dragging you? Horizontal?"

"You are disgusting. Go to hell."

He lets out a short laugh before saying, “You know that kid from your college? Leave the guy alone. That bridge creature thinks you're flirting with him."

"It's what people say about you and me." This unfortunate answer escapes your mouth. And you would do anything to collect the words anyway.

“Is that what you think we both do? Flirt?” He leans over the counter to be closer to you. “Shortcake, if we were flirting, you would know.”

His gazes meet yours and you feel a strange butterflies inside you.

"Oh yes? Likely because I would be traumatized?”

"Because you'd be thinking about it later, lying in bed."

"Are you still picturing my bed, Harrington?"

“I bet your bed is tiny.”

You're almost breathing fire. Imagining you opening his ridiculous uniform and strangling him to death.

“What are you imagining? Your countenance strikes me as obscene.”

“I'm imagining myself strangling you. With my own hands.”

“So this is obscene to you?” - Steve teases and you can see his brown eyes getting darker.

“Only when you are the victim.”

His eyebrows are raised and he opens his mouth but is unable to speak. And that's great. You managed to leave him speechless.

Later, when the mall had closed and the customers had left, Robin finally cracked the code:

“The week is long. The silver cat eats when blue meets yellow in the west.” You four read in unison.

"It can't be that." Steve says.

"That's it. I translated it right, im sure” Robin replies as the four of you walk through the dark mall.

“I also think Robin is right. Come on, why would anyone talk like that if it wasn't to hide the meaning of a message?” You speak thoughtfully.

"Exactly." Dustin agrees.

“We need a super genius to get the message but- Where's Steve?” Robin cuts herself.

When you turn around, you find Steve standing in front of a little horse looking for something in his pocket.

"What are you doing?" You ask.

He doesn't answer, just puts a coin in the safe in front of the little horse and it starts playing strangely familiar music to his ears.

“That song-“ You think out loud.

"It's the same song that plays in the background of the Russians' tape." Steve talks while meeting your gaze. "That code didn't come from Russia.. It came from here."

“Holy shit.” You say softly looking back at him.

"So are you going to say im a genius, Henderson?"

"Only in my worst nightmares and your best dreams, Harrington."

(...)

The next day, Steve and Dustin went looking for a suspect around the mall, while you and Robin kept trying to find the message hidden behind the code.

“The week is long. The silver cat eats when blue meets yellow in the west. A trip to China looks good, if you tread carefully.” Robin reads the note in her notebook.

“Tread carefully.” You repeat, the phrase sounding more like a question. A split second later, the two of you hear a knock on the back door.

“Y/N, can you take it? It's an order.”

"Of course."

You open the little window and slide through it. Opening the back door and running into a strangely weird delivery man.

You notice his uniform: Lynx Carrier.

"Good morning lady." He says turning around to make his way down the hall.

"Good Morning…"

You observe him leaving, on the back of the delivery man there was a drawing:

“Silver cat… Holy shit.”

At the same time you run out of Scoops Ahoy, bumping into Steve and Dustin who are entering the ice cream shop.

You quickly climbed onto the mall bench and started connecting the dots:

“A trip to China sounds good… There! If you step carefully… If you step… There! When blue and yellow meet in the West… There!” You smile.

“Y/N, what are you doing?” Dustin asks right below you, joined by Steve and Robin.

"I cracked the code."

(...)

You were sitting at the back table in the ice cream parlor while listening to Dustin explain the plan for the thousandth time:

“Well, there's a card, and that card opens the door. But there's an armed Russian guard, like, a really big, heavy gun.”

"Here's the thing, i can erase the Russian guard." Steve speaks confidently.

At the same moment you burst out laughing from across the room: "Sorry, but... You, Steve Harrington, couldn't win the fight with Jonathan Byers or Billy, imagine with a trained and armed guard."

"Oh, shut up, Henderson."

Suddenly, Robin gets up without giving any explanation, just says, "This might work."

A few hours later she arrived with a blueprint of the entire mall.

"Not bad." You tell her you reciprocate with a smile. "Sooo, we could use the vent, but no one will fit in there."

"I fit." Your brother speaks from your side.

"You definitely don't fit, Dusty."

"We don't need Dustin." Robin speaks while pointing to a short girl.

“Lucas' little sister? This is not going to end well for me.” You answer.

"It's our only shot."

You don't know how you managed to bribe Erica with just ice cream. What matters is that she's now inside the vent looking for clues about the Russians while you, Steve, Dustin and Robin keep an eye on the Russian guards outside.

“Erica, listening?” Robin asks on the walkie-talkie.

“Listening. Are the nerds in position yet?”

“Yeah. It's quiet out there so you have the green light to go.” Robin continues.

“Starting operation Minor in Danger. See you on the other side, nerds!” “There you go, nerds. I am here." Erica's voice reappears on the walkie.

"Excellent! What do you see?"

“Ridiculous boxes.” A scream sounds from the other side of the walkie-talkie: “I'm in.”

Robin smiles beside him as Steve snorts, "Oh my god."

And the door suddenly opens. Erica leaves the place full of “ridiculous boxes” and screams with her hands on her hips: “Free ice cream FOREVER.”

“I love this girl.” You say as everyone descends towards the location just opened by the newest Sinclair.

While digging through the boxes Steve pulls a neon green liquid from inside one of them: "What the fuck is this." Steve says.

Suddenly, the room seems to shake - it doesn't seem to, it definitely shook. -

“Is it just me or did this room just move?” Dustin asks already knowing the answer.

"Okay, take this and let's get the hell out of here." You say as Dustin moves to push buttons in the room.

“Which button do I press, Erica?”

"I don't know. Just press the buttons-“

And the room began to fall. In other words, the elevator started to fall and everyone started screaming.

"Holy crap!" You say and Steve starts screaming.

“WE ARE FALLING!” He screams.

"DON'T TELL ME HARRINGTON!" You yell back as you cling tight to one of the shelves full of boxes.

"SHIT! SHIT!" Dustin continues the screaming sequence.

“DUSTIN, STOP SCREAMING LIKE A 2-YEAR-OLD AND PUSH THE FUCKING BUTTON!” You scream one more time.

"I'M PUSHING!"

"PUSH THE BUTTON." Erica screams and finally presses the right button, causing the elevator and the boxes to fall on top of everyone.

"Ouch." Robin complains.

“My crotch! Fell in my crotch! Dustin! Take it from me!” Steve asks.

“Is everyone okay?” Robin asks.

"Yeah! I feel great now that I know Russians don't know how to make elevators.” Steve yells heading towards the damn buttons.

"Harrington, I think it's pretty clear these buttons don't work." You say, - try to say.

“They are buttons! They have to do something.”

“We are trapped here.” Dustin concludes.

“Just so you know, i was supposed to spend the night at Tina's. And Tina always has my back. But if I don't get home for Uncle Jack's party tomorrow, and my mom finds out the four of you are responsible, she's going to hunt you down, one by one, and slit your throats." Erica complains.

“I don't care about Tina! Not even for the uncle’s Jack party! Your mother won't find us if we're dead in a Russian elevator." Steve exclaims.

“Hey… What if we climb?” Dustin speaks as he points to the vent on the roof of the elevator.

The night was summed up in you and Steve trying to figure out how to open the vent while Dustin, Erica and Robin slept like nothing was happening. Until he give up:

“You know what, Henderson? Use your ridiculous idea to open the vent. But if it doesn't work, don't wake me up."

"You're so... Oh, never mind."

"Beautiful. Intelligent. Oh, wait. Ridiculously handsome. You finally understand, Y/N.”

"You are so predictable." Somehow, your words cut him deep. Filled with hate, his brown eyes narrow.

“Oh, am i? How?"

“Always the same hair, the same smell, the same flirtation. Standards. People like you will never succeed. If you acted out of the box and surprised me, i would die in shock.”

“Should I take this as a personal challenge?”

“I wanted to see you try. You are so inflexible.”

"And you're that flexible?"

"You have no idea."

“So what can i do to be less inflexible, hm?”

He's clearly hearing you for the first time. Your answer comes out as a whisper:

“You could try to stop being an asshole.”

He lowers his gaze and flashes a smile: “Ok..”

"Ok?"

"Isn't that what you want?” You don't answer and he just continues: "Tomorrow when you wake up you won’t recognize me."

(...)

You are able to hear the noise coming from above the elevator. Steve and Dustin were in the vent together - did Steve open the vent? - You wanted to be able to hear what they were mumbling so much.

“Steve, why are you all grumpy?” Dustin says.

"Maybe because I spent the whole night having to listen to your sister."

“Don't act like you don't like her, Steve. Your eyes sparkle every time she appears or teases you.” Dustin says.

“Get that disgusting idea out of your thoughts. I don't think your sister is pretty."

"I never said that. Wait- So you think she's pretty."

“No, Henderson! Now shut up.” He says as he unbuttons his belt.

"What are you doing?"

“Pissing! Now turn your face there.”

At the bottom of the elevator, where you were, a pee smell began to rise. That's when you realized it was Steve. And so you decided to test yesterday's conversation.

“Harrington, could you reroute your jet, please?”

He doesn't say anything, the jet just disappears. And you swear you let a little smile escape your lips. But you get serious again when you hear the noise of people walking.

“Robin, Erica! Come on, someone's coming. Go up now.” You scream.

When you go up through the vent you see Steve for the first time since yesterday, and he asks, "What?"

"The Russians." You answer it. "Silence."

When the footsteps seem to disappear beneath you, you run under the elevator before it is able to close.

"Shit! That was close." Dustin says relieved by his side.

"Yeah yeah. Let's go now." You speak as you walk towards the hallway, Steve following you from behind.

As you walk down the halls, you notice Steve slowly slowing down. And for some reason you do the same. Getting dangerously close to him.

“So…” You clear your throat before continuing. "Why would the Russians choose the base here- Shit-"

Steve seems to get the message right away. "You think the Russians know about the monsters and they- Shit."

"Yeah, shit."

Before you were able to continue, the walkie-talkie squeaks and Robin soon says:

"The code. We have to speed up the pace.”

When you start to hear a lot of buzz you arrive in a different environment. Full and armed guards and machines.

"Shit! Get down.” Steve asks.

“The communication room is over there!” Erica exclaims.

"How do you know?" Dustin asks nervously.

“I am psychic. I saw the living room door open, nerd!”

“Okay… we'll go fast. Now!" Steve signals.

You run and Steve nimbly opens the door to the communications room. And when you found yourself inside the room, an armed Russian was in it.

“Steve…” Dustin says.

Silence seemed to reign in the room a second before Steve screamed and ran towards the Russian.

Punching him once and leaving him destabilized, Steve grabs a phone stuck in the communications table and slams it into the Russian's face, causing him to fall to the floor.

"Dude! You won a fight!” Dustin laughs as he talks to his friend.

As everyone passes by to get the Russian's key and head towards a secluded room, you don't miss a chance to get past Steve.

"Not bad, Harrington." You say giving him a wink.

When you go up a ladder you come across a room full of people and a portal. A portal.

At the same moment you, Dustin and Steve are staring at each other. Thinking: Holy shit.

“Oookay. I think we should get out of here now, like right now.” You speak already heading down the stairs.

"Because?" Robin speaks as you walks down the stairs together with the other four.

"Let's just say that is bad, very bad." You answer it.

"Yeah. Like the end of the human race.” Dustin continues. "We're going to die."

“I didn't want to make the desperate moment worse but… where's the Russian Steve had left right here on the floor-” Erica is cut off as Russian guards enter the room and start approaching too quickly.

“Run!” Steve screams.

You couldn't understand what was happening. You were just running. Until one hour you were gone. You and Steve were holding the door of a random room to prevent the Russians from entering.

"Go! Now!" You yell at Robin, Dustin and Erica.

"No! Y/N, you're my sister!" Dustin whimpers.

"Go now, Henderson!" Steve screams.

"We'll come back for you!"

"GO!" You and Steve scream in unison before collapsing to the floor and finding yourself in the home of several Russians.

You don't know how you ended up strapped to a chair with Steve Harrington. Steve The Hair Harrington.

Steve's back was pressed against yours and you could hear him calling your name.

“Y/N! Y/N! Don't tell me you died behind my back. Henderson is going to kill me. Shit!"

"Don't you ever shut up?" You say kinda... sleepy?

"Shit! You scared me."

Silence settles in the tiny room you were in before you broke it with an idea.

“Hey, see that table over there? We could try to reach her and get the scissors! Then we would be free.”

“Okay…jumping on the chair?”

"Yeah. Jumping. Okay, not now… 1,2,3 and now!”

You and Steve do a little jump that brings you closer to the table making Steve vibrate.

"Ok! That worked, great. Let's go again." You ask.

And there went a jump, two, three and-- and you fell to the floor.

Steve swore to hear you cry, a sound that broke his heart into a thousand pieces – to the surprise of – “Hey, hey. Everything is fine. I’ll think of something and- Are you laughing?”

“I-” a breathless laugh, “I can't believe I'm going to die next to Steve Harrington! My mortal enemy!” You laugh and he joins you.

"You are stupid." Steve seems to hesitate before continuing: “Look… I wanted to apologize. For being an idiot.”

"Well, you got screwed over that, didn't you?"

“Yeah… I think at the end of the day we have to fuck ourselves to learn… You know, I wish I'd met you sooner. Maybe your hate for me had fixed me. I could be a fucking worker, making loads of money and not being stuck in an russian prison.”

“Is that so?”

“Yeah. I wanted so much. Maybe you would have helped me through.”

You smile and laugh. And Steve is sure it was the best sound he's ever heard in his life.

“Do you know whats my wish is now?”

"Hm?"

“See your smile.”

Before you could respond, the Russians entered the room and quickly got you both to your feet again.

“I hope you tell the truth this time. The doctor over there has a very painful solution for you to open your mouth.” Russian speaks with a heavy accent.

The doctor walks towards you with a blue liquid in a kind of syringe.

"Calm calm! What is this-” And Steve's screams fill the room and then his own.

This is your turn to wake up first.

“Steeeeveeee.” No reply. “Steve, Steve, Steve, Steve.”

“What?”

“Now you scared the shit out of me.” You say.

“Worried about me, Henderson?”

“Oh, don't be the badass. A few seconds ago you were all cute wanting to see my smile.”

"I did not say that."

"I think i was delusional then."

"You were. By the way, I think they got the wrong drug because i don't feel bad, like not a little bit.”

“Same.”

And you start laughing. Very very much. And then you start screaming:

“Assholes! They gave the wrong drug!”

And then you regret it - actually you didn't regret it, you didn't feel anything - when the Russians enter the room again.

“Is anyone going to want to speak the truth now?”

"Ooohhh, that's not going to be possible because Henderson is coming to rescue us."

“Steve!”

“Oh, sorry! I shouldn't have said that. But… his name is Dustin Henderson, okay? He's super smart and-"

“Steve! Stop talking!"

"Dustin Henderson, i’ll go after this Dust-"

And suddenly the alarm starts ringing around the Russian base.

"I told you." Steve smirk.

A second later, your younger brother enters the room, shocking the two Russians present.

“Shiiiit! That was pretty badass, Dusty!” You scream as Dustin nimbly slides to your side, cutting the ropes holding you and Steve together.

"You two, out! Both, now!” Dustin speaks right after untying you.

You get into a kind of cart. Robin drove alongside Dustin and Erica while you and Steve discussed:

“Imagine if Yoda were purple.” You blurt out “No-no-better! If he were neon yellow!”

And Steve laughs. He laughs so hard that he stops for a second just to say, “My belly hurts from laughing so hard! Make it stop!” And the laughter continues.

"What's their problem?" Robin complains.

"I have no idea!" Dustin responds. "Get in the elevator, let's go!"

"Yes Dad." Steve jokes.

"Daaaad!" You repeat and laugh again.

"They look drugged." Robin speaks inside the elevator.

“Y/N? Did you take drugs? Steve?” Dustin asks as he places his hand on Steve's bloodied forehead.

"We don't do drugs, Dad!" And… more laughter.

When the elevator door opens you don't even have a chance to continue the jokes because Dustin is already pushing you into the mall, or rather, into the cinema.

“Harrington, look! Back to the future!" You say.

"Let's see, let's go, let's go." Steve says excitedly.

“We're not going to see-” Dustin tries to complain but the two of you are already sitting there watching.

Errr, too late. You and Steve were already sitting down to watch the movie.

“Ooookay. Just sit there. Dont. Move.” Dustin commands as he points his finger at the two of you.

"Okay dad." Steve says stealing a laugh from you.

A few minutes pass and you decide to say: “I really need to drink water.”

"Okay, let's sneak out so Dad doesn't see."

The way to the water fountain was short but terrible. Your throat was dry and you were feeling the urge to vomit.

Now it was Steve who had his head in the water cooler.

“Water is amazing.”

"So i couldn't pay attention to that movie, but... I'm pretty sure that mother wanted to bang her son."

"No, was the pretty one Alex Keaton's mother?"

"Yeah.. I'm pretty sure."

"But they are the same age."

“Of course, Harrington! He went to the past.”

“So why is the movie called Back to the Future?”

“He has to go back to the future, because he's in the past. So the future, technically, is the present, which is his time.”

"You're too smart for me."

"Yeah yeah. Now i got out, i want to drink water again, otherwise im going to vomit.”

“Wow.. There, Y/N. You have to check it out.” Steve says while looking vaguely at the mall's ceiling. “You… do you see the ceiling? It's beautiful."

"Oh yes. Wowww.” And a minute of silence before the catastrophe happens. “Remember when I said I was going to throw up? Soooo, I really need to throw up right now.”

"Me too-"

And in a second you and Steve are already in the bathroom spewing all that suspicious liquid out. And what relief you felt when you threw up.

“The ceiling stopped spinning for me. Is it still spinning for you?”

“Holy shit. No. Did we vomit it all up?”

"It might be. Ask something. Ask me there so we can see.”

“Interrogate you? Okay, let's see. Yeah... when was the last time you peed your pants?”

"Today."

“Whaaat?”

“When the Russians got that injection.”

Steve laughs. "Yeah, you're still on drugs."

"I'm kidding. Come on, ask me a decent question.”

"No, no. I'm bad at this. Make me one.”

"Okay... Have you- Have you ever been in love?"

“Yep. Nancy Wheeler. First semester of senior year.”

“Oh, Nance. How could i forget?! Tragic."

“Yeah. Broke my heart.”

“Do you still love Nancy?”

"No."

"Why not?"

“I think it's because i found someone better for me. It's insane. Every time his brother comes to talk to me he says: “You have to find your Suzie.” And I think i found my Suzie. I actually found her since last year.”

“And what is she like?”

"She is amazing. She's smart, so smart i feel dumber than anyone could feel when I'm around her. And she has a smile, god, that smile. She is beautiful, it hurts to look at her. And shit, every time I think about her I hate myself because I know I should have been with her a long time ago.” He sighs before continuing. “And she's so funny. And she doesn't even force. It's just her. ”

And now you sigh. Your hands are holding your head and you are completely silent.

“Y/N? Did you just overdose there?”

"No."

And Steve slides across the bathroom floor, coming face to face with you.

"The floor is disgusting, Harrington."

"Yeah, but im already full of blood and vomit on my shirt so it doesn't matter... What do you think?"

"About?"

"The girl."

"She seems great."

"She is great. And the guy?"

"I think he's on drugs and not thinking straight."

“Really? I don't think he's ever thought so straight in his life."

"He's not."

“Why?”

"Because, actually, he hates this girl."

"I never hated you."

“Steve...”

"You hate me?" You do not answer. "Because i definitely don’t hate you."

“Love and hate are similar, Steve. You are getting confused.”

"If I hated you i wouldn't want to kiss you every time i see you."

Shit.

"So do it. Kiss me."

Steve looked at you carefully. And when you showed no signs of hysteria or that you were going to withdraw, he leaned over and placed a long kiss on your mouth. With his face pressed against yours, he kissed you like he was afraid, afraid it was more of a game.

You were able to feel his heart pounding against your ribs, and his mouth kept sliding over yours, over and over again. He pulls away with a small kiss to the corner of your mouth, and you both look at each other.

Steve is still at the point where the kiss was just a game, maybe. But then you lean forward again with a smile, and in the space of a sigh, you've given him what he needed: Lips and tongue and the occasional brush of teeth. His hands move to your waist.

"Your heart is super racing, Harrington." You say when you pull away a little. Steve's hands gripping your waist.

“Oh, shut up, shortcake.” He says leaning in again but you stop him.

“I would love to continue this to ease the build-up but we still have to save the world. And this is not hygienic.”

"I hate you."

"You love me."

#steve harrington imagine #steve harrington #stranger things #imagine #stranger things 4 #eddie munson #steveharrington #i love steve #robin buckley #dustin henderson #erica sinclair

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wanderinginksplot · 3 years ago

Text

Commander Wolffe + First Kiss

I was requested to write a first kiss one-shot for Rex or Wolffe. Rex's turned out nice and fluffy, but Wolffe had other ideas. Here's that fic!

Word Count: 3,200

Warnings: predator/prey vibes, dominant* Wolffe, vaguely references a previous work (OC Curl/stubborn!reader), but reading it isn't necessary to understand this.

(*There is no explicit content in this chapter, but if I were to write mature content, this one-shot would be a good jumping-off point. Just so you know what kind of work you're getting into.)

---

The battlefield was dim beyond the blue beams of your blaster as you fired again and again. But the droids kept coming. There were enough of them that you didn't really have to aim. No matter where you pointed the blaster, there were plenty of droids to fire at.

Your helmet - a cheaper, lightweight version of the standard-issue Phase II helmet - let you hear that the general consensus of the troopers matched your own. The whole situation had been a trap and, despite the Wolfpack's best efforts, the battle was lost. The only thing left to do was wait for the final order to retreat before beginning evacuations as quickly as possible. With a quick response, most of the men could survive this.

The sounds of the battle worked to deafen you, but the audio feed inside your helmet managed to be louder. Loudest of all, though, was the commander.

Commander Wolffe had circled around, putting himself between you and the combat as much as he could while staying out of your blaster's line of fire. With only a slight turn of his head back toward you and the assembled troopers, he ordered, "Pull back to the Solidarity."

You paused, unsure of whether he would be able to fend off the fast-approaching droids without an extra blaster to lay down fire.

"Get back to the ship, now," Wolffe barked, the command ringing sharply through the speakers surrounding your head. The modified HUD showed that he was transmitting directly to you now. "Do not make me repeat myself again."

"Yes, sir," you rushed to agree.

Your late evacuation from the doomed battle meant that the transport was less crowded than they usually were. That was bad for two reasons.

First, there were fewer people to help keep you supported. You had traveled in enough LAAT/i ships to have grown some semblance of air legs, but blasting off from a battlefield at a steep angle was a bit beyond you. Especially when you factored in the weaving necessary to avoid being shot out of the sky. Without more people in the transport to help prop you upright, you were stumbling like a newborn fathier.

The second reason a smaller evac crew was bad was because of Commander Wolffe. Rather than being lost in the crowd, tucked safely away in the mass of troopers, you found yourself constantly in the commander's sightline.

He was still wearing his helmet. Feasibly, you shouldn't have been able to tell how he felt under the thick plastoid and tinted viewports, but you could. You definitely could. He was furious, glaring at you more often than not.

You blamed your linguistics skills for that silent understanding. So many languages across the galaxy depended on posture and non-verbal communication to fully express ideas. It had given you an edge in the work you did for the GAR, helping you find the perfect interpretation for a concept mid-conversation. Now, however, you wished you could shut that particular skill off.

When the LAAT/i had landed in the Solidarity's hangar bay, your most important goal in life was to leave the transport before anyone else. Commander Wolffe's temper was infamous. You weren't overly confident that his anger would fade with the time it took for you to cross paths again, but you were willing to give it a try.

Unfortunately for you, being the last transport meant that the Solidarity launched into hyperspace as soon as you were fully aboard. That, combined with the residual shakiness in your limbs, worked against you.

In the half-second it took for you to regain mobility, the commander had straightened and activated the external speakers in his helmet. "Everyone out. I need to speak to our interpreter."

You saw almost every trooper straighten his spine at the buzzing threat in Wolffe's command. More than a few of them gave you a pitying glance. Budge even bumped your shoulder with his, throwing a sympathetic look your way.

Nerves were tingling in your stomach as Budge - the last trooper - stepped out of the LAAT/i, but things kicked into overdrive when the commander punched the switch that started levering the heavy doors closed. With a sense of impending doom, you watched the side doors ease slowly into place.

For a wild moment, you seriously considered jumping out at the last moment. It would take him some time to open the doors once more, time you could use to flee. Still, he would be even more furious once he caught you. It wasn't worth the tradeoff, no matter how loudly your fight or flight instincts were screaming.

When the doors had closed with a resounding boom, your muscles locked, holding you in place as Wolffe turned to look directly at you.

He was still wearing that helmet, the gray painted designs catching the light filtering through the LAAT/i’s viewports, then blending into the shadows in the next moment as he started to move in your direction.

“Care to explain just what you were doing out there?”

His voice was pitched low, deceptively even in tone, but the tension thrumming through the ship kept you on edge. “Shooting.”

“And who cleared you for combat?” the commander asked, not waiting for an answer before he had launched another question at you. “What were you thinking, picking up a blaster like that?”

You had been asking yourself that since you had first straightened with the weight of a discarded blaster in your gloved hand. You would have liked to defend yourself, to claim that you had planned out an assault or had seen a weakness in the enemy lines. Unfortunately for you, that wasn’t true. The real answer wasn’t going to make Commander Wolffe happy, but you doubted that he would tolerate being lied to.

“I don’t know.”

“You don’t know,” he repeated bitingly. “I believe it. In fact, I refuse to believe that you put any thought into the choice at all. You just did it. Isn’t that right?”

Commander Wolffe had started to circle around you, as if to tell whether you were being honest by studying every part of your posture and behavior. It was incredibly intimidating, which you thought was probably another benefit for him.

“Yes.”

“Yes, what?” he snapped.

Whether it was your upbringing or your professionalism or just old-fashioned fear, your polite nature was still in place. You immediately answered, “Yes, sir.”

Since he was still walking around you, you couldn’t see his reaction to that, but the commander’s steps faltered for a moment. “Good girl.”

Something low in your stomach tugged at the sardonic praise given in that rough voice. You couldn’t tell if your nerves were sharpening your interest or vice versa, but you worked hard to keep your face blank.

“You aren’t a trooper,” Wolffe told you bluntly. “You haven’t been trained to handle a weapon, you don’t know any of the plans we were trying to put into place, and you were only lightly briefed about the terrain and surrounding areas. You were a liability out there. It’s enough to make me reconsider whether an interpreter needs to be on the field at all. I’ll talk to General Koon, but in the future, you should stay on the Solidarity until we find out whether we need interpretations.”

The anger that had been simmering in your chest for the first half of his speech dissipated in the rush of cold fear from the second. “But… Commander, you yourself have admitted in the past that the interpretations I’ve provided in the middle of battle helped to formulate a change of action that improved the outcome of the combat-”

“I wasn’t finished,” Wolffe said harshly. “I won’t let you pull some jare’la stunt that leads to your death. I won’t let my battalion’s reputation get destroyed by a civvie with a death wish trying to play hero.”

You spoke only a bit of Mando’a - most of your experience lying in languages much further on the edges of the galaxy - but you knew enough root words and insulting phrases to guess that jare’la was not a compliment.

Gathering your wits, you turned to fix the commander with a firm look, though it was thrown slightly by the fact that he had removed his helmet when he was behind you. Still, you met his gaze and kicked up your chin.

“Commander, I will not stand here and let you discipline me for taking action to protect the battalion,” you told him, keeping your voice as steady as possible with those amber-and-silver eyes burning at you. “I may not know exactly why I picked up that blaster, but I know it wasn’t for something as vain and short-lived as glory. More importantly, if there is a chance that I saved the life of a single trooper, I would gladly do it again. Lecture and all.”

“Bold words,” Wolffe rumbled. “The life of a single trooper is not worth the life of a civilian. According to the Republic, you made the wrong choice.”

“I made the choice I could live with,” you countered, suddenly at peace. It was the truth. You had done what was right according to your morals. That wasn’t something that could be taken away.

“And what would we have defended ourselves with the GAR if you got yourself shot making a name for yourself?” Wolffe snarled.

“I told you, that’s not why I did it,” you snapped, feeling your grip on your temper loosening dangerously. “If all you’re going to do is insult me, I’m going to leave.”

He was taking up most of the space in front of the panel that would open the doors once more, but you brushed past him anyway. There was no way to avoid making contact with him in the close quarters of the LAAT/i, but it didn’t matter. You were willing to snake your hand between the plastoid of his armor and the side of the ship, as long as you could reach the panel to open the doors once more.

“I haven’t dismissed you,” Wolffe reminded, voice sharp. “You’re staying here. Consider that an order.”

“I’m a civilian attachment,” you told him, parroting the words you had heard him say to one of the techs a few weeks ago. “You have no authority over me and cannot issue orders.”

The commander grinned, but it looked more like he was baring his teeth in a grim mockery of happiness. “You accepted my authority over you the second you picked up that weapon. If you want to play trooper, you can play trooper. That just means you get the full experience.”

You held your hand out for him to shake and he quirked his brow. “If this is a resignation, I won’t take it.”

With a slight shake of your head, you held your hand out even further. Hesitantly, the commander wrapped his fingers around it and you gave a decisive shake. “It’s a deal.”

“What is?” he asked, sounding bemused.

“That I’ll keep playing trooper,” you told him. “You can yell at me, order me around, do whatever you think is necessary for the ‘full experience’, but I’m allowed to fight to keep the men safe.”

“That’s not how this works,” Wolffe said, voice venomous.

“It is, actually,” you countered. “You’re the one who made the deal.”

He stepped closer - too close, actually, and you could feel every nerve ending on your exposed skin burn in tense anticipation. “Is that really how you want to play this, civvie? You want to be a trooper so kriffing badly?”

“I accepted your authority over me the second I picked up that weapon,” you reminded him. From the barely banked fury lighting his eyes, he didn’t like the verbatim quote. “...Commander.”

He was so close that you had to crane your neck back to see him. Violence was rolling over his scarred face, and every instinct you had was screaming for you to run. Honestly, what had you expected? Wolffe was a commander through-and-through, used to ordering people around and being obeyed without question. You had refused to do that so far. Besides, you had known what using his title would be seen as: a challenge. And yet, despite your typical meek politeness, you had used it anyway.

When he moved, Wolffe’s hand lashed up so quickly that you barely had time to wince before it was buried in your hair, pulling your head back to the absolute limit while he stared down into your face. Your eyes went wide, confused and a bit concerned by the heat that surged through your lower half. Without any input from your mind, your eyes dipped to glance at Wolffe’s lips while your own parted slightly. It felt like you couldn’t get a full breath.

The next moment, those lips were on yours and you didn’t care as much about breathing.

It was not a gentle kiss. Wolffe’s mouth was impatient, thorough, sharp. It may have been because you had pushed him so far, but it could also just be the way Wolffe was. You were betting on the latter… though a pinch of the former was just as likely.

The commander swept through you like a thunderstorm, nipping not so gently at your lips between plundering your mouth. You didn’t have a chance of withstanding him, not with the way he was looming over you, holding you in place for his kiss. This close, you could smell the battlefield that you had fought on together, the acrid smell of plasma from his blaster, and - underneath it all - the warm scent of his skin.

The hand in your hair relaxed slightly, caressing its way down to the nape of your neck. He wasn’t freeing you, though. His other hand had a grip on your jaw, controlling every motion of your head. You were trapped in place, burning away under the heat of him, but the thought of struggling never crossed your mind.

Wolffe ripped his mouth away from yours eventually. You groaned at the loss of him, but his lips only traveled to your jaw and down your neck. He pressed soft kisses to your skin, offering occasional bites to keep you on your toes.

By the time he pulled away, you were both panting. You stared at him wide-eyed, but he only looked deeply smug. His gaze traveled down over you, picking up every patch of bitten skin, every rumple in your clothes, the way your hair was in disarray. His brown eye gleamed just as brightly as the cybernetic silver as he smirked.

“You look good like that, verd’ika,” he told you.

Verd’ika, your brain processed, was a Mandalorian diminutive. Little soldier, he had called you.

“Yes, sir,” you agreed willingly enough. “Is this how you discipline all of your little soldiers?”

His eyebrow shot up. “Do you really think that, translator?”

You pretended to consider it for a second before you nodded. He glared and you broke, laughing openly.

“Lying to a superior officer?” he asked, looking perfectly serious other than the light in his eyes. “That’s more discipline coming your way. You’re digging yourself a deeper pit all the time, little one.”

“Sorry, Commander.”

Wolffe’s face grew solemn once more. “No matter what happened between us, or what else may happen in the future, you really can’t pull another stunt like that on the battlefield. Not just for the Wolfpack’s sake, but for yours, too. I don’t think the men would react too well to seeing you hurt or worse. Understood?”

You deflated a bit, noting that he didn’t say anything about his own reaction to you possibly being injured or killed. “I understand, Commander Wolffe. I meant what I said: I don’t really know why I picked up that blaster, but I won’t be going out of my way to do it again.”

“Good,” he said softly, voice rumbling through his chest. “I don’t know what I- what we would do if we lost our favorite translator.”

Your face softened at that, you could feel it. Wolffe’s expression changed a bit as well, and he moved closer to you again. His hands rose to cradle your jaw, moving slowly enough to make it clear that you could stop him. You didn’t, and he angled your head to receive a gentle, lingering kiss.

“Sorry about all of that,” Wolffe told you, drawing back far enough that you could look at each other without getting a headache. “That should have been our first kiss.”

“The other one was perfect,” you disagreed gently. “I know who - and how - you are. This kiss was nice, but I knew the other one was you. I enjoyed both of them.”

Wolffe stared at you and the intensity in his eyes was intimidating. It felt like he was seeing everything, even your private thoughts. Abruptly, his features took on the look they always did when he was ordering the troopers around. It was difficult to explain, but it looked almost like he was putting armor on his face, wearing a mask of authority.

“Put your arms at your sides,” he ordered and you obeyed without question. “Look at your feet. If you look at me directly, you’ll earn another disciplinary action.”

You immediately did as he had told you, unsure about why. With your eyes on your feet, you couldn’t see exactly what Wolffe was doing, but you heard him start to circle around you. Something about those heavy footsteps on the metal floor - drawing closer and closer but never touching you - was unspeakably intimidating, but only in the best way. You shivered.

“So you want me to order you around, verd’ika?” he asked silkily. “Look at me now. You could have just asked.”

Your mouth opened as you began to shamelessly do just that, but Wolffe shook his head. “Too late now, though. You lost that chance. If you had asked, you could have been my good girl, my favorite. But you didn’t. You manipulated and took, so you don’t get what you would have before. Now… you’re mine.”

“What does that mean?” you asked, wanting to cringe at the excited fascination in your own voice.

“You’ll find out soon enough, won’t you?” Wolffe replied mysteriously. “You’ll know when I give you orders, verd’ika, don’t worry about that. Go back to your quarters now. I’ll see you before you know it.”

You nodded, remembering at the last second to add, “Yes, Commander.”

The heavy doors swung open once more and you blinked at the Solidarity’s hangar bay. So much had happened that the normal surroundings threw you off slightly. You started to step out of the ship anyway, but Wolffe’s voice stopped you.

“You took out fourteen droids back there.” Maybe you were imagining the warm pride in his voice, but you hoped not. “You did well. But never again, not unless I’m dead.”

“Yes, sir,” you agreed, smiling a bit. Wolffe was proud of you, and had kissed you like someone desperate for your touch. The battle was a dark spot on your life so far, but the aftermath had been nothing short of revelatory.

You had never been so excited to receive orders.

---

A/N - I know, I know: this had the spice of a Pringle, but it was a little more daring than the things I usually write (or, at least, the things I post). Still, thanks for reading!

Find other works on my masterlist or feel free to request a fic of your own!

Taglist: @crookedwiings @rexs-wife @sugarpuffsstuff @stargazingthenightaway @just-some-girl-92 @kimageddon @ladysongmaster @carodealmeida @adriiibell @nomercyforthewarrior @boomtowngirl @quietplaceinthestars @bitchylittleredhead @blck-omen @lackofhonor

As always, if you want to be removed from the taglist, let me know! If you want to be added, you can find a form here.

#star wars #star wars the clone wars #sw tcw #star wars fanfiction #star wars reader insert #commander wolffe #tcw wolffe #wolffe #wolfpack #wolffe x reader #wolffe x you #commander wolffe x reader #commander wolffe x you #clone troopers deserve better

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timextoxhajima · 3 years ago

Note

hi dana.. if it’s possible can i request some angsty wangsty based on niki la la lost you with eric🥺 and ughh i really love your writing like crazyyyyy

♥ title: la la lost you in april [also part of @sunlightwoo ‘s 12 Months I Loved You collaboration project]

♥ member: tbz eric

♥ genre: f2l, ex! eric x fem! reader, model! eric [SFW!]

♥ warnings: swearing, some mentions of sex [like, once i think]

♥ wc: 3.4k

♥ a/n: sis when i first heard the song I absolutely loved how you used 'angsty wangsty' so I hope this one does it for you the way you imagined it <3 [fyi i wrote it in like, a camcorder recording audio format which is something i’m trying out so please hmu on whether it’s difficult to read/understand!]

[REC: APRIL 2, 2019 - 6:39PM] SOLO LOG #1

Are you seeing this? This is the most beautiful sunset I’ve seen. I gotta get a shot of this-

Hey! Hey! I could help you take a picture with the sunset if you want to!

Oh! Would- Would you? That’d be great!

Of course!

...

Here. Is it alright?

Yeah, yeah, it’s cool! Thank you so much!

Are you recording something? Is it a- Are you vlogging? Are you a vlogger?

Yeah, no... I’m actually on a solo trip for a bit.

Oh, where are you from?

Just the next state.

Ah! You’re taking a break off... life then? I assume? Sorry if that came out weird.

No! No no! It’s alright! Yeah, I just needed a short break from... y’know, school and everything. My semester ended pretty early on so I took the chance to come out here and... see some new sights, meet some new people.

I get that. Well, for a start, what’s your name?

Oh, I’m y/n. Nice to meet you! And you?

I’m Eric.

[REC: APRIL 4, 2019 - 10:34PM] SOLO LOG #2

It is the 4th of April, 2019. I know, I know, I’m meant to do a daily vlog for all the 50 days I’m here but... it’s been... wow. Um... so I met Eric, the first day I touched down. The beach is just, about a 10 minute walk down and the sunsets are absolutely gorgeous. But uh... call me a fool and say that I’m living in the clouds but- what are the chances?

He’s funny, he’s such a great person to be around with y’know? Never a moment of like, awkwardness or stress and my God, look at me talking about a boy like that, though I met him 2 days ago.

...

Um, he’s a freelance model. For those freelance shoots by UNIQLO or Target or something and he complains about the pay sometimes, but he looks good infront of a camera, so he’s... actually the one who won at life, really.

I’m not seeing him soon because he’s got a shoot out of town and he’ll be back next week. But I did get his number and he’s been texting me since.

...

Wouldn’t it be funny if we end up together and then I have this whackass of a reel to show him? Jesus... I need to stop getting ahead of myself here. Freakin’ living in the clouds, aren’t I?

...

Anyway, I’m gonna go and see if I can get my weird projector shit up and working. See you.

[REC: APRIL 7, 2019 - 5:14AM] SOLO LOG #3

It is... 5am... uh, April 7th- and I was just binging FRIENDS through the night, waiting for the sunrise before I get some shut eye and then... Eric just asked me out. Oh my God! Um, he’s coming back this Thursday and I’ll go see him at the airport before we go get dinner.

It was really funny ‘cause he had to wake up early for a shoot today and so his day has just begun but mine’s coming to an end and I just- I’m rambling so much, it’s kinda- it’s kinda sad, isn’t it?

I think I’m too happy to sleep right now so I’m just gonna text him some more before the sun rises- oh! He replied!

...

Anyway, I’m gonna go and finish up this last episode before sleeping. Hopeful I can sleep. Bye!

[REC: APRIL 11, 2019 - 4:28PM] SOLO LOG #4

I am on my way out right now to go meet Eric at the airport, and I’m... it’d be an understatement to say that I’m excited. I know I’ve only known him for like, 2 days before he left but... I miss him. Is that possible? Missing someone despite knowing them for 2 days?

Anyway, I gotta go. Don’t wanna be late to see him.

[REC: APRIL 13, 2019 - 10:23AM] SOLO LOG #5

Oh! Is that what you had-

Yeah! It’s the same camera!

What are you vlogging for, actually? Like-

Nothing, really. It’s just for my own usage-

Wait, you didn’t like set that up last night while we-

Oh, God, no! Who do you think I am?

I don’t know, I mean, we’ve known each other for... is it two weeks-

Just under two weeks-

Jeez-

I know, I know, oh my God.

...

I don’t regret it though. Yeah, like- I don’t really go down to the beach that often in the first place and it just- it just so happened that you were there that day and I saw you struggling with this old thing-

I was not struggling!

Yeah you were!

I wasn’t-

I’m kidding! Gosh, you’re so cute.

...

Are you gonna have the camera recording while this carries on?

I forgot it was on-

One day we’re gonna accidentally make a sex tape-

Eric!

[REC: APRIL 17, 2019 - 1:15AM] SOLO LOG #6

-ould you pass me the hot water?

Mm? What?

The kettle over on the counter. Careful, it’s hot. Yeah, thanks.

Do you need help with-

It’s just instant noodles, sweet. Doubt I need a diploma for this. You’re recording again?

Yeah, does it bother you?

No, no, ‘course not. Though that means I can’t really do whatever I want to now.

What does that mea-

...

I can... still taste that bit of milk tea you had just now-

Could you tell it’s zero sugar?

I don’t think that matters, it’s still sweet and not great for your health to have that so much.

Aw, and yet you’re the one who suggested noodles at this timing, yeah?

You were hungry too!

...

Here, it’s done. Help me get the bowls?

Did you even wash these?

Yeah, I did. If you don’t trust me, you can run them under the water for a bit.

Mhm. Here.

If it’s not enough, we can call for Macs.

Y’know, I’ve never had Macs past midnight back at home.

What? Really? Well, when you get back in May, would you try?

Yeah, why not? Maybe I’ll do that when I’m back in school.

...

What date is it today?

April... hold on, um, 17. Careful, that’s hot.

...

When are you leaving again?

May 22.

Are you planning on coming back anytime soon after?

I don’t know. I have school to worry about and the only other time I can come back’s probably during winter break in November.

...

I won’t be around in November.

Mm? Why not?

I’m moving.

To where?

I’m not sure yet, but I need to move depending on whether I get it and where the shoot’s at.

Shoot? It’s a big project, huh?

Yeah, it’s- it’s a pretty big deal.

...

I’ll- Let me just go and...

[REC: APRIL 20, 2019 - 7:49PM] SOLO LOG #7

-idn’t have to!

No, c’mon! It’s such a great time to get this on camera! Come on, tell us what just happened!

Well, I just scored a huge model contract with Calvin Klein - in Manhattan.

AHHHHHHHHHHHHHH! I’m so fucking proud of you, oh my God! Can you believe it-

No, fuck off, I can’t either!

Oh! Calvin Klein!

...

I swear, you’re an angel sent to me-

Fuck off!

I’m serious! it’s so timely- I just can’t- I’m just so happy to have met you.

...

Well, you heard it first here, ladies and gentlemen. Eric Sohn is a new model for Calvin Klein - Manhattan.

[REC: APRIL 21, 2019 - 12:40PM] SOLO LOG #8

It is 12.40pm... April 21st, 2019. I’m finally back in my apartment after crashing at Eric’s for the last... 10 days? I think it was 10 days. My clothes were running out and I didn’t want to hike up his water bills so I just came back and- y’know did my own laundry.

...

Well, it’s- it’s been an absolute dream. The last thing I expected to... have, or meet? Here, is Eric. Um, but I know I’m probably going to regret this. Especially when May 22 comes. Uh... this is... it’s real bad. I mean, we’re great, y’know? But... it’s bad, because I know it’ll hurt. Like a bitch. When my time here is up, and I gotta go back to my reality, and Eric’s gotta stick to his.

We haven’t really talked about it. May. I don’t think he wants to, and I don’t think I want to either. 50 days is too short. Either that, or I shouldn’t have come here in the first place. I shouldn’t have gone to the beach that day, in that hour.

...

I just wish we had more time. I wish 24 hours were... maybe about 100 seconds more per minute. Does that make sense? 160 seconds per minute. Then again, I don’t think that’d solve my problem. I’ll still be on a ticking... time bomb.

...

I know I shouldn’t say this. I know I can’t. I know I can’t afford to. But... I... I love him. I love Eric. With every... bit of me. It’s so... disgustingly cliché, but I feel so... comfortable with him. There’s really nothing we’d fight about, and even if we disagreed on something, we’d play it off like a debate, then forget about it the next day.

...

I love him. I do. And I’m going to regret this later. Without a doubt.

...

[REC: APRIL 27, 2019 - 2:02AM] SOLO LOG #9

-ou can see the stars?

I don’t know, that’s why I’m trying, sweet.

...

Can you see them?

Yeah, maybe if I just turn this ISO- Oh! I can kinda see the North Star-

Oh! Yeah, you can! It’s really feint though.

Right.

It’s okay, we can just lay it down here-

On the grass? Will your camera be fine?

Yeah, yeah, or else you can just put in on top of my bag- here.

...

Here, can you see me? Am I in frame?

Yeah, you’re in frame.

Okay, great. Now get over here!

...

I can taste the smoothie you had just now.

Too sweet?

A little.

...

Oh my God! Put me down! Oh- not there! It’s ticklish- AHHHHH!

...

y/n, I have something to tell you.

Mm? What is it?

...

Hello? Earth to Eric?

I... I love you. So much... and I can’t bear to see you go in May.

Oh, Eric...

No, I- I don’t want you to stay- or even think about it, ‘cause, you have your priorities and I have mine y’know...

Mhm.

I just... I just wished we had more time.

I do too. I really do.

...

Eric?

Hm?

I love you too.

...

[REC: MAY 1, 2019 - 4:23AM] SOLO LOG #10

1st May. 4...30? Am? I believe. Um, Eric’s sound asleep in his bed and I couldn’t sleep so I decided to do a log.

...

I have... 3 weeks left. 4 weeks have gone past just like that, and I don’t know what to think about it. I came for a 50-day retreat. No stress, just myself and peace and quiet and tranquility and yet-

...

I- I don’t know if I can do this.

...

[REC: MAY 7, 2019 - 3:58PM] SOLO LOG #11

So, Eric’s in shoot right now and I’m on the way into the studio with some donuts and coffee to surprise him. I called his manager and asked if it was okay so- I’m pretty psyched to see his workspace.

...

Hi, I’m y/n, I’m here to visit Eric?

Ah, okay! Hold on, let me just get you signed in with the pass-

Count me in!

You sure? This Saturday at the prep-party?

Yeah- Oh!

Eric!

y/n! What are you doing here?

I wanted to surprise you. Am I... interrupting anything?

Oh, not at all!

You must be y/n! Eric’s told me so much about you!

Did he? And you are...?

I’m Chelsea! I’ve been attached to the same Calvin Klein contract he recently got, so you could say we’re colleagues!

Well, nice to meet you! Oh, right, these donuts and coffee are meant for you guys actually!

Oh! You’re too kind! Eric, you’re such a lucky man.

I know, she’s just... everything.

Anyway, thank you so much for these. I’ll bring them back down to the studio for the crew to share. But Eric’s pretty much done for the day actually, so you guys can leave if you want to!

Are you sure? Don’t you need help downstairs with the equipment?

No, no! It’s fine, there’re more than enough people downstairs. Go have your date, and maybe you can bring her along with you for the prep-party this weekend!

What’s the prep-party... preparing for?

Oh, you’re so adorable! It’s a prep-party for the end-of-May shoot we’re gonna have. it’s a collab with DAZED so it’s a pretty big project.

You never told me you were involved in a collab with DAZED.

I was gonna tell you today.

He has been pretty busy recently, maybe slipped his mind. Anyway, thank you so much for the donuts and I’ll hope to see you at the pier this Saturday, mm?

Yeah, sure. Thanks Chels.

No problem! It was so nice to meet you, y/n, I’ll see you Saturday!

Okay, bye!

Bye, Chelsea! It was nice to meet you!

Bye!

...

Sweet, why didn’t you tell me you were coming?

I wanted it to be a surprise. I thought you said you’d end pretty late?

The filming was cut short because the shots were better than expected so we ended early.

Oh, I wanted to film you while you were at work.

You have that on?

Yeah- why?

No, just wondering.

Are you uncomfortable?

No, no, it’s just... I really didn’t expect you to come to the studio.

...

[REC: MAY 11, 2019 - 11:12PM] SOLO LOG #12

It’s 11:12pm, 11th May, 2019. 11 days to departure.

...

I... saw... Chelsea and Eric... um, out by the garage-

...

Well, I guess... it looked like they were just... having a really good talk. Or something.

...

I left. I couldn’t watch it. So, I left without telling Eric. I did tell his boss that I wasn’t feeling well and I had to leave first.

...

I guess this is the part where I regret it, isn’t it? Um... I don’t know... how... I’m gonna explain this to him when I see him again. Which is supposed to be- um- the rest of the night. I was supposed to go back to his place with him and I’ll stay for the weekend before I come back to pack my things, so-

...

y/n, are you home?

...

shit.

y/n, I know you’re home. I heard you talking. Open the door, I need to talk to you.

...

[REC: MAY 12, 2019 - 2:00AM] SOLO LOG #13

...

I look like shit, don’t I? God, my eyes hurt like a bitch.

...

I don’t think I need to say what just happened for you to guess what just happened, right? This... says it all.

...

Fuck.

...

I shouldn’t have come here. How did- How did my retreat turn out- turn out like this?

...

This is- This is too much. Too much in too short... of a time.

...

I don’t think... I don’t think I can do it. Not anymore.

...

[REC: MAY 19, 2019 - 9:59AM] SOLO LOG #14

It’s May 19th, 2019, almost 10am. I just came back from a morning walk by the beach just to... reminisce a little before I leave on Wednesday.

...

I... haven’t seen Eric since the prep-party. I blocked him and I told him not to come over, though I think he has, like, a few times. I thought I heard someone come up to my door, but he never knocked.

...

So, this is how it ends, huh? A 50-day romance cut short like that. Into about, 40?

...

It’s crazy to think that I had... the experience of a whole relationship in 40 days. I definitely did not sign up for that when I booked this 50-day retreat.

...

It was fun while it lasted, though. It was. I don’t think I’d find anybody else like Eric, and I guess it just sucks that it had to end like that. Things happen, right? That aren’t... in our control.

...

[REC: MAY 21, 2019 - 8:07PM] SOLO LOG #15

May 21st. About 8pm. I leave in about 15 hours.

...

All my stuff’s packed. Definitely more things to bring home than I brought here. Half of these things were bought by Eric and given to me. I’m... actually not sure if I should bring them back.

...

I don’t- I just don’t think I’d have the heart to throw them away.

...

Nor look at them when I’m home.

...

Should I even bring this camera home? Maybe I should wipe your memory before I bring you home, hmm?

...

It feels like a dream, doesn’t it? Everything that’s happened. It feels like a fever dream. Maybe when I’m finally home, I’d wake up and it’d be the day I come here.

...

Maybe.

...

[REC: MAY 22, 2019 - 10:03AM] SOLO LOG #16

-ny more luggage?

Nope.

Alright then, I think you’re all set. You still have about an hour’s time before the gates are open so you can get a cup of coffee or something, yeah?

Okay, thank you!

Have a nice flight ma’am.

Thanks.

...

Good evening ma’am, can I check your boarding pass?

Yeah, sure.

...

Okay, you’re good to go. Have a safe flight.

Thank you!

...

[REC: MAY 22, 2019 - 11:34AM] SOLO LOG #17

It is about 11.30am and I’m on the flight, and here’s the view outside. Sky’s pretty clear and this thing says that the weather’s great so, it should be a smooth flight without turbulence.

...

This is it. This is really it.

...

Um-

Hi, ma’am, I’m gonna need you to keep your camcorder.

Oh! Yeah, sure, sure, sorry!

[REC: APRIL 2, 2020 - 12:48AM] ERIC LOG #1

Wow, this is... weird. How did you do this last year?

...

Um, hi. y/n. If you’re watching this then I’ve somehow managed to get this synced into your camera by some weird... bluetooth, iCloud shit that Felix helped me figure out.

...

It’s been a year. And... I just thought you should... see this, or hear me out, at least. I know we didn’t end on the best terms... and I’m sorry. It was my fault. I shouldn’t have yelled at you for being unreasonable for something that was... suspicious. I should’ve understood.

...

I should’ve been there. To see you off. And I’m sorry I didn’t. I... was scared, that I wouldn’t be able to let you go if I went to send you off. I was a coward. I still am.

...

But I do want you to know that... those 50 days were the best days of my life. Albeit it ended horribly, but nothing could... nothing- nothing will ever replace what happened last April.

...

I said I love you and... I still do. Every day I think about you and your smile and your voice and- and I cry to sleep... worrying that I’d forget how you sound like, or how you laugh and how... how you smell like. My bed smelt like you even after you left.

...

I just- I love you. And I miss you. And I’d do anything to go back to what we had. I’d do anything to get- to get you back.

...

I’m sorry.

...

the clip comes to an automatic stop. the white triangle slapped onto the screen, begging you to play it again. you look up from the screen, watching the famous calvin klein ad that hasn’t stopped playing in the last month.

he hasn’t changed one bit. not his hair, not his smile, not his voice.

it’s a bittersweet pot of memory stashed in the back of your head when the memories flood back. looking back down at the camera, you count back the days - it was synced just last night.

the pile of tissues by your thighs are carelessly huddled into the bin next to your feet, mentally berating yourself for going through the memory instead of formatting it.

you stand, fingers shutting the screen back onto its body with a soft click. the tv blacks out when you press the red button on its remote.

you’re halfway into your kitchen when there’s a knock at your door, and you immediately gasp, blinking rapidly.

“oh, it’s my fucking projector!”

rushing to the door, you don’t hesitate to get the door open.

and yet, like the heavens were providing you with all the light to stop you from doubting yourself, your lungs empty themselves like vacuums.

your heart stops.

your breathing stops.

“eric... what are you doing here?”

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