#this was the thing going on before i even figured out rick and morty exist
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glimpsesofeuterpe · 9 months ago
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cornelius sure got ... the most of alternates of them all?? even alternates of alternates? and alternates of alternates of alternates???
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bredforloyalty · 7 months ago
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Do you have any thoughts on why Rick and Morty used a Ryan Elder cover of Live Forever over the montage of Fred's life in That's Amorte? Feel like you're probably one of the best people in the world to ask atm given the overlapping interests :)
Also I always felt like Time and Tide in the finale is kind of a Morty flavoured version of that montage too, and meant to be understood in that context, because it's so similar and what we're shown is basically the same thing (only with Mortys fear hole life instead of Fred's real one) what do you reckon?
FUCK I FORGOT TO ANSWER THIS so sorry...... ❤️‍🩹
i may not be the best person to ask because when i watched that's amorte and heard that song in it what i thought was. "oh that chorus is familiar i must have heard this before it must be a famous song" and i listened to the original and went "well i don't enjoy that much" and that was that for me 💀
anyway now that i have a relationship with live forever and with the band i think it's because it's universal, isn't it? simple lyrics about wanting to live. as they show you the infinite value of a single human life (and it got me tbh when i watched that, i think it worked)!
i'm not really good at like, deep analysis and i don't have an opinion on each line and my opinion is that the beauty of songs like live forever lies in not having an exact meaning. each line doesn't have to be crystal clear or involve poetic devices, it resonates with so many people because it's simple.. i just wanna fly. you and i are gonna live forever. what does maybe i don't really wanna know how your garden grows mean? who cares ! maybe it means i don't want to live carefully or wait for things to get better or maybe it has something to do with their mother's love of gardening or it's about wanting to break out of the banality of working class existence (etc everyone can figure and everyone does figure)
bc as i now know very well, the gallaghers, y'know, didn't exactly have it easy before starting out, council housing, no music education or anything, noel got battered by his father regularly as a teenager before they left with their mother and still he said he woke up every morning happy to live and he was always determined to make something of himself. and he wrote these songs about living forever and being a rock and roll star and feeling supersonic... i think there's a real power in that i think this makes it a fitting song for the scene. if anything, it's life-affirming!
annnd about time and tide, yeah i think they're similar in function and as i watched the season i umm noted that it had two montages with ballads (of sorts) over them and that's interesting, but to be honest i don't know what that context would be? what do you think, how do you think of/interpret that scene? what does this similarity add to the fear hole montage? i think maybe it's different in the sense that live forever is meant to evoke, this is not the best adjective to use but positive feelings, you know, gratitude and connection, while time and tide is more bittersweet. i felt it was about morty eventually outgrowing rick but never really letting go. there's a lot of love there and even more fear
but really what do you think of that specific part of fear no mort? ^^ do share your thoughts if you'd like to<3
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hazelnut-u-out · 2 years ago
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here you go, @theresonlyzuul !!
HOLY SHIT- WAS THIS FUN TO WRITE... i feel like i keep getting carried away with these birdrick asks. thank you so much for the request!
again, please send in any requests you guys have for sfw rick and morty fics. these are helping my block so much and they're keeping my skills sharp, haha.
i hope you like it! <3 (i kinda leaned into the jealousy, but i made sure to throw in some internal angst monologues for you!!)
-birdrick; just a couple of widowed girldad bros w romantic tension ;)
-3566 words
-TW: brief mentions of suicide
_______________
Honestly, Rick was shocked that Birdperson had invited him over.
“I’ll see you when I see you,” didn’t exactly seem like the type of open-ended statement that would lead to a hangout session any time soon, but…
There Rick was.
The elderly man stood outside of his best friend’s front door- the wind a corporeal thing that attempted to sway him this way and that from the branch he stood on.
He’d always liked it up there, so far above the ground.
Rick had often thought of how he’d like to go out- frequently by his own decision- and this, he’d always thought, would be a nice place to jump from.
The sky glowed a husky orange, clouds whispering sweet nothings to one another in the distance. Their murmurings wrapped around Rick’s lithe form as he tried to decipher what they were saying.
Part of him envied those tangerine swirls. Their romance wasn’t ever forbidden or unrequited. The only bad thing that could happen was for them to eventually drift apart- tugged by different breeds of wind.
Even then, though, they were made of water. They adhered to the cycle of their elements, just like everything else. Their contents would spill upon the ground so that they could inevitably rise back into the atmosphere. That meant, after enough time had passed, they’d eventually get to be together again.
He took solace in that- in being made up of elements.  
Eventually, the atoms that he was comprised of would exist alongside everyone else’s he’d ever loved again.
It would take a hell of a lot of time, but… it would happen.
Rick stretched his arms out wide, leaning his head back and letting the wind breathe life into him. He needed to remember to breathe.
Sometimes, that was hard. It was always the remembering to do the silly little things about being human- like eating and breathing and sleeping- that seemed to evade his memory. He overthought every little thing.
He was a big-picture kind of guy, regularly more focused on how things would come together than what they would look like if you broke them down.
If you had broken his life down, he’d first point out the pain; the sorrow; the grief; the pointless war and apathy and inability to compromise; maybe even the booze.
If you gave him enough time though, truly a man of science, he’d get around to looking a little deeper. Underneath all of that, he’d assume, was just a seventy-year-long succession of breathing- of sleeping and eating.
He smiled, letting his arms fall back to his sides.
Maybe he’d even find a laugh in there. A touch that lingered too long. A silhouette in a hospital bed and a little hand wrapped around a finger.
He was shocked when he didn’t wince at the memories.
Rick was anxious, that torrent in his belly turning wildly and making the inside of his throat flutter. He could feel the hammering of his heart in the shell of his ears; in the tips of his fingers.
He’d been drinking, of course- as much was needed to keep him alive at this point- but not as much as he usually would.
He figured he wouldn’t have liked anyone raging drunk around Beth when she was a baby. In fact, he remembered that being a rule- no drinking in the house.
Beth…
He rubbed his left thumb over the handle of the paper giftbag clutched in his hand.
When he finally tamped down the butterflies threatening to swarm out of him, Rick reached a hand up and tapped gently on the door.
It was a lengthy moment before Birdperson answered. It was as if everything stilled and leaned in to see what would happen next. Even the clouds hushed their whisperings- the leaves of the trees pausing their dancing.
A soft squeak resounded through the bark of the tree, telling the forest it was once again acceptable to resume its festival of life, as the hinges opened.
To say that Rick’s best friend always took his breath away would have been an understatement.
Sure, he was always breathtaking, but Rick had never heard a single descriptor or turn of phrase that encapsulated the rugged beauty that stood before him. Not in four decades had any verbal illustration felt satisfactory.
It was an energy that he gave off- or one that he sucked in from the world around him. He demanded as much as he gave as he walked by, a warmth radiating off him that was tantalizing from its stance within the desolation that encompassed the universe.
It was less that Birdperson took Rick’s breath away and more like his essence reeled him in gently, then landed blow after blow to his ribs until it was a labor to breathe in the first place.
But BP smiled, and Rick breathed.
Rick had always thought, if he’d had enough time, Birdperson could have become his air- something he could come to expect, to crave and need, each time he opened his mouth. Funny that air could burn to inhale like this.
Rick couldn’t bring himself to return the grin. Instead, he fidgeted nervously with the bag- bringing it around to his front and loosely holding it with both hands.
“Rick!” Birdperson bellowed, stepping forward and slamming an arm around the other man’s shoulders. “How have you been?”
“You mean, since-“ Rick cut himself off. No- today wasn’t about him. “I… I’ve been good, Pers.”
Rick looked up to meet his friend’s gaze and finally offered up a tentative smile.
He tried to ignore the warmth of BP’s arm that was sinking through the fabric of his clothing and into his skin; tried to ignore how it was the perfect weight to sit atop his shoulders. Not too heavy, but enough to keep him grounded.
Birdperson smiled back as he guided Rick into the foyer of his home.
“That is good to hear, my friend,” BP responded, stepping away. Rick felt the absence of his friend’s touch seep into his core. “I know that we have had our differences as of late, but when I met her… Well, Rick. You are the two most important things in my life. You and my nestling are all I have left, and… I’d like you to meet her, too.”
Her.
A bit of Rick’s heart swelled, aching in dull absence. This was a feeling he knew well.
“You…” Rick’s voice trailed off. He studied his friends face from his stance a few paces away as BP closed the door. It was obvious he hadn’t been sleeping well- dark purple shadows painted the skin beneath eyes and his stubble had grown out enough to shade the lower half of his face. Rick chewed his lip, clearing his throat before continuing. “You had- she’s a girl?”
Rick fought against the tightness in his chest, but he couldn’t help the wavering of his voice.
A girl.
Rick watched as his companion’s eyes expanded into pools of twinkling starlight, his smile broadening.
“Yes.”
Rick sighed, a strange emotion commandeering him now. He shot a quick glance down to his hands- the bag hanging there from his fingers.
“I guess- that’s perfect, then!” He finally answered. He extended one arm into the space between them, making a quick gesture with his chin towards the offering. “Some, uh… some of Beth’s old stuff I took from the house when I-“ his voice broke. He swallowed to find some resolve, urging himself onward. “when I left… Uh-uhm, it-it’s just a couple of little nighties, some stuffed animals- shit like that. I-I figured- thought you’d get more use out of it. I altered the clothes to make room for the wings, but, uhhh… I couldn’t- couldn’t, ya know… part with all of it.”
The other man tenderly reached out, unhurriedly taking the bag from Rick’s hand. “Thank you, Rick. I know that could not have been easy. She will love them.”
“You- ya know, you could’ve called me to help put her down. Watch her while ya got some sl-sleep or whatever.” Rick offered, uncomfortable with the vulnerability filling the space between them and desperate to fill the silence. “I-I spent a while figuring all that shit out and-and… well, I didn’t get to use all the tricks I learned as much as I would’ve wanted.”
“Oh, well,” Birdperson started. “Actually, that brings me to-“
“Hush now, little one,” A soft, feminine voice reverberated from around the corner, cutting the other man off.
What. The. Fuck.
Rick’s heart sank, plummeting into the depths of his stomach, and he sucked on his teeth to avoid saying anything.
Had… Had he…
“Pers, uhhh… did-did you… meet someone?”
So soon? Rick fought against the lump in his throat. Today was not about him. Today was not ab-
Birperson laughed- a hearty laugh that Rick did not join in on. Honestly, he was struggling to find the humor in the situation.
“No,” BP finally answered. “Of course not.” His smile faltered. “I… Tamantha was… well…” The other man let his voice taper off, pausing for a moment before smiling again- this one not meeting his eyes- and continued. “She is my nanny.”
Rick felt like a ton of bricks had been lifted from his shoulders, loosing a breath he didn’t even know he’d been holding.
“Hmm? Someone called?” That same delicate voice crooned, a figure coming around the corner.
She was a plump woman with a kind face and rosy cheeks that accentuated her elegant smile. Her wings were tucked away, the plumage on her head slightly longer than BP’s, and she stood a couple of feet shorter than both of the older men standing in the foyer.
Rick immediately gave into that part of him that sought out his criticisms of others. She looked… too warm, too cozy. Comfortability was something that he did not trust anymore, and this woman radiated a grounded, downy feel.
It was what was cradled in her arms, though, that immediately drew Rick’s interest.
Rick had been petrified at what he would feel since his friend had muttered the word “her.”
Being a father is an instinct that never leaves you- and that was what Rick was. Deep down in his bones, he still thrummed with the deprivation of all those years. Beth was so little, so tiny, when he had failed to protect her. He knew that, no matter what he did or how he did it, the gaping hole within him would never be filled.
There was a silhouette cut out of his center, as if the man who had severed the very extension of his existence from him had used a cookie-cutter to gut him. The silhouette of a little girl- and it was a raw, bloody wound; infected and fatal.
That’s why he took himself by surprise when he leaned down, craning his neck to get a better look at her.
The tiny girl before him was probably the only thing that stopped Rick from shooting a half-thought-out witty bite at the nanny. He knew that the two bird people before him were talking about something, but he couldn’t hear them.
All of his senses were trained on her.
She was small- so small- and so… precious.
She looked like Tammy, yes- but there was something about her… so uniquely him…
Rick was never one to hide the softness he harbored for little girls. Some deep part of him was engineered to nurture them- and it had been far- far- too long since he’d had one to nurture.
Her little cheeks were warm with a sleepy glow, her eyelids shut, her lashes gently fluttering with a dream. Little puffs of air darted out from her parted lips here and there as she stirred. Her tiny wings were draped over the crook of the nanny’s arms, and Rick extended a hand to ghost a finger down the edge of one of the silky feathered appendages.
He had hated Tammy, and here… there was nothing- nothing- in this little girl he could bring himself to hate.
Nothing sharp or jagged- nothing broken or battered to her yet. This was so foreign, yet so excruciatingly familiar. She had never been hurt, never failed, never hollowed; chewed up and spit out.
If you were to place her beneath a microscope… there was nothing but breathing, sleeping, and eating; laughter and, he was sure, a bit of murderous rage- if she was anything like her mother, but…
Breathtaking.
“Rick?... Rick?”
Birdperson’s words finally cut through his haze, and he pulled his hand back. He looked up to meet the nanny’s stare and mustered up some semblance of a bland smile for her. He didn’t care if it looked fake.
“This is my nanny,” Birdperson continued quietly, waving a hand in the direction of the pudgy woman in front of them. “As you know, my culture does not believe in naming, but she takes clients of many backgrounds. As such, you can refer to her as ‘Sparrow.’” Birdperson turned to face Sparrow. “Sparrow, this is my best friend, Rick Sanchez. The path we have walked together is soaked with the blood of both friends and enemies. Please be kind to him.”
“…May I?” Rick asked, careening his hands outward gently, wanting very much to feel the comfortable weight of a child in his arms- if only just for a moment- but Sparrow swiftly turned, stepping away.
“Ohhhh, I think not,” she whispered. “The little one is tired- and she has quite the angry fits when awake, if you know what I mean.”
Rick’s tongue went sour in his mouth and his limbs tensed. Carefully, he said flatly, “She’s the daughter of a mega bi… violent woman-“ he shot a mindful glance at his friend. “and an intergalactic terrorist. I’m pretty sure I have enough experience to handle a psy-psycho kid, Sparrow.” Rick narrowed his eyes as he spat her name.
“All the same,” Sparrow crooned. “You needn’t worry, Mr. Sanchez. I’ve got it all taken care of. You boys have fun, now.”
The nanny turned on her heel and walked back around the corner.
Now, there was something Rick could find in himself to hate.
He turned back to BP who was nearly swooning with exhaustion, one palm pressed to his forehead.
“Would you be interested in watching a movie?”
Birdperson’s home was one of the only contented places in the universe to Rick- one of the only sites he had learned to trust.
The downy fabric of the couch was a reminder of what a safe haven this had once been to him; the heady coating of the coffee they sipped on his tongue an assuring modicum of normalcy.
The two men sat and chuckled; chatted; caught up- and Rick smiled all the while. The thrum of the television speakers in the background a fitting underlay.
Birdperson’s home was an embodiment of all of Rick’s domestic visions.
That being said, the longer Rick spent in Birdperson’s home, the more irritated he became.
First, came the screaming.
The small girl had awoken from her nap, and that insolent nanny had let her run amuck.
Well, his use of the descriptor “let” was a loose fit. It was more like this “nanny” had no concept of how to deal with such behavior.
Rick found the corner of his lip twitching upwards every time the little one had managed to garner an upper hand on the young woman. If he was picking a horse in this race, he’d have been rooting for her.
Rick was able to keep his opinions to himself- to sit with his friend and mask enjoyment of the quaint atmosphere.
Gradually, BP nodded off to sleep- and Rick knew better than to wake him.
Poor guy. This was probably the nanny’s first day. He must have been exhausted. Rick remembered that adjustment phase.
He laughed lowly now at thinking he could’ve never handled it. He thought, if he woke up tomorrow with his little girl in his arms again, and this had all been some horrible dream, he wouldn’t be the slightest bit rusty at being a dad.
Soon enough, against his own volition, Rick drifted off as well.
Rick didn’t know what time it was when he finally stirred from his slumber, blushing when he realized he’d been resting atop Birdperson’s chest. He could hear his friend’s heartbeat resounding beneath his ear and he tenderly brought a hand up to rest there, next to his head.
It was dark in the house, and he closed his eyes again.
A muted cry roused him again. A father’s instincts never leave. At first, he chose to ignore it- Sparrow would tend to the baby.
Birdperson’s breaths were still deep and even beneath him, and he began to wonder where the nanny had gone as the cry went unchecked for a few more long moments.
At last, Rick decided to go check on her himself- untangling himself from the mess of limbs upon the couch as carefully as he could and stretching.
The night was a void not too-dark here. The soft glow of small lights in the upper corners of he home illuminated the house just enough to get around.
Good. Rick didn’t like the dark.
He thinks that’s part of why he liked it here so much.
He followed the sound of the cries through the home, finding a note as he passed the fridge.
Nestling is sleeping.
Let myself out and locked the doors.
Stayed a few extra hours after my shift.
You seemed tired.
-Sparrow
Rick scoffed, crumpling up the paper and tossing it into the bin.
Finally, he found himself in the corridor, an open door to his left emanating a subdued whimpering.
He rubbed his eyes, taking note of the small nest-like cradle, and shuffled his way over to where he could see two tiny hands wriggling in the low light of the room.
Once close enough to see her, he crouched down- taking a moment to study her once again.
She was so tiny- fragile, even, for something he had heard was so dangerous.
She lay on her back, face tear-stricken, nose snotty and crinkled. She was…
She was wearing one of Beth’s pink onsies. “Pumpkin,” it read in hand-sewn font. He remembered making it.
Beautiful.
A small part of Rick could have sworn he’d just been stabbed in the gut- something scraping along the edges of that silhouette of a wound. Tears pricked his own eyes and he sighed, shaking the weight of the grief to the floor.
“Ohhhh, my sweet girl. C-come here, niñita,” he cooed gently, wrapping his willowy arms around the nestling and pulling her tight to him; secure.
He brought a calloused thumb up to wipe at her tears- her cheeks a sticky mess- as his own settled atop her russet hair. She began to quiet down.
He continued to breathe comforting little words into her hair, bringing his hand to instead clasp her head and hold it to his lips.
Rick wasn’t sure how long he spent sitting in the floor of that nursery with his friend’s child in his lap. The floor was sharp and hard, cutting into his bottom, but he didn’t mind when his legs began to hum with pins and needles. A cool flame lapped at the inside of his ribs all the while.
Still, he found himself warming up in a gentle sort of way.
Once she had calmed down, she had gotten squirmy and restless.
Rick pulled her back, singing to her. Not once did she try to scream or kick or shout.
He showed her how to play pat-a-cake, and she awed and cooed. His shoulders relaxed as a smile snaked its way along her lips, her wings occasionally shooting up and bumping against his lashes or bits of her plume getting stuck in his stubble.
All the while, he whispered encouragements to her as she babbled.
“Qué niña más buena!”
“Good job, niñita.”
At some point, she looked up at him in… understanding? Her little lips parted in a smile, and she whispered back as she brought her hands up to cup his face “Niñita.”
His heart shattered, and he pulled her tight to his chest. His tears cascaded freely down his aging face and over his lips, salty on his tongue as he opened his mouth.
“Silly girl. You’re ‘niñita’. I’m… I’m Rick.”
That’s when he realized.
He was sober.
Early in the morning, the sky making way for dawn, he placed the tiny sleeping body back into the bassinet.
He made his way out of the house, his back sore and his heart aching.
He made sure to call BP as soon as he was on the flight home. He wanted to make sure he was up to hear her if she needed him.
Later that day, his phone buzzed.
He glanced down, letting out a noiseless chuckle and going back to the task at hand.
PERS
Is “niñita” an Earthling phrase?
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orphicrose · 3 years ago
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The Only One
Rick x Reader Fanfiction
Summary : life is strange in the rick and morty universe, as we all know. But things get just that little bit weirder when Rick meets you. Something seems oddly familiar with you, but for once In his life he has no idea why. So he searches from reality to reality to try and see if he had met another version of you, only to realise there where none. You where the only one. That’s when it finally hit him…
This is inspired by a song from Rick and morty that I think is beautiful https://youtu.be/epiOcz3HXNo
I accidentally got carried away and wrote too much, so I will probably just do a part 2 so it’s not to much to read if anyone is interested <3
_________________꧁♥︎꧂_________________
Humans are such fragile creatures, always have been and always will be. You knew that, but you refused to surrender down to it. Not wanting to be included In whatever earth had to offer, so you ran away. And not like how a silly fourteen years old runs away from home, Hah… no.
You left the fucking planet, not leaving behind a single trail or speck of dust for someone to follow you with. Your intelligence and ambition was all you needed to carry yourself through life. Travelling the infinite void of space, soon making a name for yourself. For good and for bad. An ordinary person couldnt even dream nor comprehend the things you’ve experienced or seen. And that’s just how you liked it. Being different. It was truly a gift to be intelligent.
And then there was rick, high IQ and normally not happy about it. Seeing his intelligence as a curse. Rick hadn’t seen it all, it was impossible, but he thought he had seen enough to make a valid opinion on life.
It’s pointless.
Such a bitter man with a bitter view on everything, including himself. You see, when you have an overwhelming amount of knowledge weighing down on your mind, you can go two ways. The first being ricks way, not caring about anything since he has seen how big the universe is and doesn’t see a point.
Then there’s your way, feeling blessed to be able to see things that no one else can, and finding a new reason to live every single day.
You two where polar opposites, but also the same. You where both alone in a universe you felt didn’t need you anymore.
The day both of your worlds collided should have been written down in the history books. It was the day both of your beliefs where almost questioned. Wondering whether fate really does exist.
————————————————
Out of the many things you have done, you’ve never visited the same place twice. Making everyday an adventure, as much of a cliche as that sounds it’s true. Not only that, but you seem to have people after you almost everywhere. For your intelligence, or for revenge. But there is one particular spot you cannot get enough of. Finding yourself there when you lose yourself.
It’s an isolated planet in the middle of the andromeda galaxy. It’s a newly ‘emerging moon’ as you like to call it. In fact, you pretty much founded this planet, since its a recent creation. This also means there is no intelligent life yet evolved, so it is safe for you to do what you please.
You go there often, to watch the two suns set over its small horizon and the thousands of stars come into view. Giving you time to reflect on your life. To appreciate it, but not to regret anything. The stars are far to beautiful to bring your mind to anything negative. The planet itself seems to project the meaning of peace and tranquillity even without life. Maybe that’s why it’s so comforting.
Your thoughts where leaving your mind, as you held your eyes closed. Feeling the breeze brush through your hair gently. That beautiful, genuine smile found its way to your face without you noticing. You where to lost in the feeling of relaxation.
But that soon came to an end. That euphoric state was snapped out of you when you noticed a bright light coming towards you. Getting bigger and bigger in just seconds. Until it became more clear, it was a spacecraft of some sort. A poorly built one to say the least. You sat and watched, mesmerised, as the flames from the object slowly engulfed it. Burning in the atmosphere. Finally hitting the ground, you shook your head and sighed. Being brought back into reality.
The flames took a second to fade after the ship had crashed. And it was clearer to see, it was the stereotypical UFO. The type you’d see in cheesy ski-fi films. But it had encryptions written in English. Which was very unusual, especially for it to be in this part of the galaxy.
What was even stranger was that it didn’t have even the slightest burn mark to it’s metal. Your vision of it became clearer and clearer the closer you got, slowly creeping past the incredibly green trees towards it. But just before you got too close, a figure fell out of the vehicle. Swearing like a drunken sailor.
This is what really messed with you, it was a human. You gasped quietly, not being able to remember the last time you saw one. A mix of feelings rushed over you; confusion, fear, excitement? You couldn’t help but stare, his unique blue hair bounced as he picked himself up, not even bothering to dust off the dirt on his lab coat.
“Fuck! You fucking piece of shit spacecraft. You’ve really done it this time Rick you fucking…” he didn’t finish his sentence, as he kicked the lump of metal. Screaming at the top of his voice.
“Fuck!”
You caught a small glimpse of his face, and recognised him. But you weren’t sure where from. You had met millions of people over the years so he could really be anyone. But there was something so compelling about his character. Something that felt like you where being pushed towards him. Or pulled, by a red string perhaps. Something that was just telling you to interact with him.
You stayed hidden behind a rather tall tree, still collecting your thoughts and questioning whether you should help him. Rick had slumped himself against the ship, putting his hands to his face and grunting. Pausing his breakdown for a second to take a sip from his flask, then proceeding to carry on.
He stayed like this for a good few minutes, before you had decided to approach him. Your curiosity and questions where burning at the edge of your mind. You just had to investigate. Keeping a hand on your weapon tucked neatly in a pocket behind your back. You slowly walked towards him, not even being able to speak before he noticed you.
A gun had been pulled to you, aiming directly between your eyes
“What do you want? I’m not in the mood so just tell me in advance if I should shoot you or not..” his eyebrows furrowed, looking at the hand tucked behind your back.
You rolled your eyes, putting your hands up in surrender. Just how you remembered humans to be. Aggressive and impulsive.
“Calm down, I saw your ship crash. Thought you where in need of some assistance. And put that gun down, god…” to your surprise, he did. With a loud grunt he put his gun back into his pocket and turned away. Usually, he probably would’ve shot on site. And who’s to say he still won’t, but right in this moment he is too preoccupied to care.
“God doesn’t fucking exist…” he mumbled “and I definitely don’t need any assistance!”
You raised an eyebrow at him, watching him as he attempted to fix his broken ship. Opening the lid to the engine and being greeted by a storm of smoke. Now Seconds away from another breakdown.
“Are you… okay?” You hesitantly asked, daring to inch closer to him. Probably was the stupidest thing you’ve ever done. He threw the wrench down at the engine as he exploded.
“No, I’m not fucking okay. I lost my grandson, the entire galactic government is after me, I broke my portal gun and I just crashed my ship into a planet with no helpful resources to fix it.!” His speech sped up, and he went dead silent when he stopped talking. Clearly regretting telling you anything. He is usually good at keeping his mind together and keeping his problems to himself. But he had so much adrenaline pumping through his blood, he could barely concentrate.
“I’m, i’m sorry for your loss” is all you managed to get out
“What? Oh no, my grandsons not dead. I just left him somewhere and forgot exactly where…” he spoke slightly softer, still grunting as he tried to analyse his engine.
There was a small silence while you processed everything he had just said. Moving closer to get a look at his engine, you shook your head.
“You’ve burnt it out…”
“Yeah, no shit smart ass” he bit at you
You rolled your eyes and snatched the spanner from the place he had dropped it. Not using it to fix his engine, but you pulled out a small metal box from your pocket instead. Fixing a few pieces together. Rick stood there and watched with a puzzled look on his face. Moving his eyes from the gadget, then up to get a look at you.
His eyebrows softened as he took in your features, the creases in his forehead disappeared. A rush of a strange feeling replaced the adrenaline, not being able to pinpoint what it was but he didn’t like it. He could only describe it as his heart softening, and getting lost in a place that was familiar to him. Thats what he felt when he looked at your eyes, reflecting off of his.
“Hav-have we met before?” He said in a much calmer tone
You placed the gadget on the engine and pressed a small red button on the top, looking up at him.
“I don’t think so?” The box moved around the engine, like a shield. Fixing it effortlessly, Ricks eyes darted from you, to the engine, then back to you. Now with amazement written all over his face.
Deja vu was the only state good enough to describe what he was experiencing. You broke the silence by holding a hand out to introduce yourself.
“I’m y/n”
It took a quick second for him to respond, still trying to process your face and remember how he knows you.
“I’m… Rick” he finally shook your hand.
“Rick Sanchez..”
That name was oddly familiar to you. Like you’d heard it in a dream. Or it was a loved ones name in a past life. You felt like you had heard it before, in a very distant memory. But no recollection of the connection.
“That seems…familiar” you tilted your head, squinting your eyes at the old man who gave you the same look.
“Well, I wouldn’t be surprised if you knew me. I am the smartest man In the universe”
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lokitvsource · 3 years ago
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You came into the show with the idea of Loki clashing with the TVA already in place. How exactly does this kind of arrangement work at Marvel? Michael Waldron: There was a creative brief that was 20 pages or so that basically said: “We want to do something about Loki running up against the TVA. Here’s some different avenues that might be cool to explore.” It was really serving it up for writers as a jumping off point for us to put together our pitches. Then I went off and really worked on the idea of Loki being brought in to hunt another Loki, and that becoming the heart of the show, and the Loki/Sylvie relationship. The big thing that I did in my pitch — even as early as pitching it to Kevin [Feige] — I really walked through the six episodes, kind of similar to what they were. I knew I wanted Episode 3, for instance, to be a little bit of a Before Sunrise, with Loki and this character walking across this apocalyptic moon. But Marvel had the initial, probably the most important spark of genius, which was just Loki and the TVA.
Where did the idea of the variant being a female Loki come from? That was one of my ideas, that we then confirmed in the writers room. Yeah, we knew from the get-go that it was going to be Loki falling for another version of himself.
Why was that appealing to you? I love writing any romance; it’s fun. Especially, it hasn’t been done a ton in the MCU. There’s an obviously self-reflective quality to it. And a show that’s quite literally about self-love; it is Loki getting to see parts of himself. At the start of the show, he kind of hates himself. He assesses himself to Mobius as a villain. And then he meets Sylvie, and he sees her as someone on a heroic crusade. He sees the good in her, and is able to see the good in himself.
Mobius suggests that, of course, Loki fell in love with his own variant, because he’s a narcissist. Do you think he’d be capable of falling in love with someone who is not a version of himself? [Laughs] I don’t know if he didn’t fall in love with himself first. Maybe after that, but the first time he falls, maybe this is what it had to be.
What’s the key to telling a time travel story that takes advantage of the concept without confusing the audience? I think it’s doing a lot of work that the audience never sees. It’s really understanding the logic of this thing, building out the TVA as a real organization that actually exists in our minds. Our writers room, we had a TVA handbook, encyclopedia, what they do and why they do it, a glossary of terms. And then you want to only give the audience the absolute bare minimum to understand the story, and to just get swept up in the emotional stakes of everything. If the sci-fi of it all, if the time travel logic of this show did not hold up week to week, then that would have distracted from the emotional journeys of the characters. So I’m glad that even though everyone had to take their medicine a little bit, along with Loki, in episode one, I’m glad it didn’t distract from the story we were telling. And we had the benefit of Loki being the audience’s eyes in. The audience is learning as he is.
There’s a funny scene in Avengers: Endgame where the Avengers start arguing about exactly how time travel works in the MCU. How much did you have to study what other Marvel movies had done with the idea to make sure your rules were consistent? Fortunately, Endgame was the main one, and that’s how they understand it. The TVA is an organization that understands time travel on a deeper level, probably more comprehensively than the Avengers do in Endgame. We wanted to make sure we were staying true to any rules that they laid out, but sort of establishing our own rules. It’s a time travel show. What was I thinking? A movie’s one thing, but a show is hard.
How many Loki variants did you have on the writers room whiteboard at various points? Hundreds. So many different Lokis. There was one Loki, actually maybe it was a version of Mobius that took off his glasses, and he just had really tiny eagle eyes, like he could see everything. There was stuff like that all over the white board. Tom Kauffman, who wrote that fifth episode, he’s an amazing comedy writer, and was on the first three seasons of Rick and Morty. His first draft of that episode was just bananas.
Was there a variant, or a crazy idea in general, that you really loved but couldn’t ultimately do? There was so much different stuff that we wanted to do in the Void. But the truth is, I don’t want to say any of it, because you never know. The ideas that I want to do the most may pop up elsewhere.
Okay, so let’s stick with a variant we did see. Was Alligator Loki actually a Loki, or just an alligator that happened to be wearing a Loki’s crown? A magician can’t reveal his tricks, man. That’s the great debate. Let it rage.
What was Alligator Loki‘s origin story on your side of things? Who pitched him and how was that initially received? That was maybe my very first meeting with the producers at Marvel, Kevin Wright and Stephen Broussard, talking about the show, and me saying, “When we’re doing this, you can encounter lots of different Lokis. You could have an alligator Loki. Why? Cause he’s green.” And us all laughing about how stupid that was. I think I made the point that it’s that energy of what we can do with the show. We can have something like that, but let’s play it straight. Alligator Loki, you get a laugh out of it, but by and large you try and play it straight. That was the fun tonal balance that we tried to strike in the show.
There’s been some conflicting information out there about whether the big bad was originally just going to be He Who Remains, who’s a different comics character altogether from Kang, and whether the casting of Jonathan Majors changed the plan. From your point of view, what happened? The character was always written as a version of Kang, as early as the first draft of the script, we knew in the writers room, relatively early on. He Who Remains, that’s the guy behind the curtain with the TVA, and we saw an opportunity to fuse that mythology with the Immortus mythology. And that was just really compelling. It was a way to elevate, it just felt right for Loki, because Loki was there in the first Avengers, he’s the one who brought the Avengers together, and here is directly related to the exploding of the multiverse, this event that will drive the events of Phase Four. Certainly, when Jonathan came in, it allowed us to step on the gas of just how eccentric and charismatic this character could be. I was inspired in the writing of He Who Remains by Tom Cruise’s character in Magnolia, trying to give it that Frank TJ Mackey energy a little bit. He captures that and then elevates it to something else that’s different and weird.
You just said how important the multiverse is going to be to Phase Four of the MCU. How challenging is it to have to set up this big thing for the larger Marvel endeavor while also serving the needs of the particular story you’re telling on this show? It’s a challenge in the sense that it’s all a relay race, and you’ve got the baton on this thing, and you want to do a great job. The name of the game over at Marvel is with each movie or TV show, make it the best it can possibly be. And they’re really supportive of that, and trust that it will organically fit into the larger blueprint of everything. We were excited about introducing a version of Kang, because yeah, to introduce this new big bad was cool for our show. I was aware, and cautious, of the thing I read in your review, that it might not be the most sound storytelling to introduce a new character at the very end that we’ve never seen before as the big bad of this thing. Obviously, we had the benefit that people know who Kang is, and there’s a meta thing where a portion of the audience knows Jonathan Majors is going to be playing Kang in Phase Four. But the finale was only ever going to work if He Who Remains, in a compelling way, serviced the Loki and Sylvie emotional story. That was the most important job that that character did in the finale: he laid out a very compelling conflict that ultimately drove the two of them apart.
There has also been some confusion as to exactly when you knew that there would be a second season, as opposed to you just making a limited series. Initially, in the writers room, we were not operating as though there would be a second season. And the whole way through was, this should be a story that should stand on its own. I referenced The Leftovers and Mad Men all the time. I think about those seasons, they pushed the overall stories forward, but you can pull any one of those seasons and look at it on its own as an individual story. I wanted that to be the case here, whether we did a second season or not. I think we always felt that we would want to propel Loki forward into the MCU after the conclusion of our season. The only question was, would that be in an appearance in a movie, or would that be in a second season. And it was only over the course of development that the stars aligned to make a second season.
But that end scene, where Mobius no longer recognizes Loki and the TVA is filled with Kang statues, wouldn’t have been a satisfying conclusion to a limited series. That is an ending that only works if there’s going to be a second season. So there is another conclusion to the story that I wrote that exists out there, that I guess is just for me. My own little play, that I perform with my action figures.
What was Sylvie’s original plan, before Loki hijacked her to that dying moon? It was to empty out the TVA. The entire bombing of the Sacred Timeline was to create a diversion. She’s not going to be able to create a multiverse from doing that. Ultimately, the TVA has the manpower to get out and take care of these events, but they’re going to have to scramble a lot of their minutemen teams, and it leaves the Time-Keepers significantly less guarded than they would have been otherwise. That was her plan.
You didn’t come into this as a big comic book nerd. So was there someone on staff who could tell you, “Well, there’s this giant cloud called Alioth that eats time,” or, “Well, one time Thanos had a helicopter,” or maybe someone assigned to you by Marvel? I’m constantly reading the comics but trying to not be so beholden to the and do our own thing. I charged our writers assistant, Ryan Kohler, with, “You’ve got to become the authority on all things TVA, all things Kang, and all that.” So he and my assistant, Sophie Miller, became a support staff who read a ton of these comics and became a wealth of knowledge for the writers to turn to. And then the Marvel producers, obviously are very well versed in the comics. It was Kevin Wright who came in one day and was like somebody throwing down a blueprint in an asteroid movie, going, “Alioth! Look at this!” And we were like, “Ohmigod, this is perfect!” The best thing about working on these comic book shows is that if it’s from the comics, it doesn’t matter how much of a deus ex machina it is, it’s just cool, like, “I can’t believe you pulled that from the comics.” Alioth, that was a big breakthrough that unlocked the last two episodes for us.
That is not a famous comic book that introduces Alioth. It’s an obscure Nineties miniseries, with really ugly art. But you look at it and see what it could be. You say, “If we do this, and it feels like Twister, it’s going to be really cool.”
Was Mobius’ love of jet skis there simply to illustrate his character, or did you have a grander idea in mind? I will come clean: I’m a jet ski guy. I’ve spent a good amount of time on jet skis in my day. I used to tow a jet ski to a lake and ride it in college. So it probably was me. Loki, I was just becoming a steward of that character. Mobius was a character I really felt I got to create from nothing. There’s not really anything to that character in the comics. So bits and pieces of me found their way in. I just think there’s something so poignant — here Mobius is, a guy who is literally fighting to preserve all of time in the multiverse, and yet his interests are maybe the most humble, human, terrestrial, unremarkable thing you can think of. Just a jet ski. And when you’ve got Owen Wilson playing him and it’s just that much better.
Will you be back in some capacity for Season Two? [long pause] Time will tell.
‘Loki’ Head Writer Michael Waldron — and ‘Rick and Morty’ Alum — on MCU, ‘Heels’ and More
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lokiondisneyplus · 3 years ago
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Most Marvel post-credit scenes hint at the future. Loki opted for a blunter approach: the God of Mischief would return in season 2.
Based on the final turn of events, there was really no other choice: Loki (Tom Hiddleston), having journeyed to the furthest point in spacetime with his variant Sylvie (Sophia Di Martino) to meet the founder of the TVA, a scientist-turned-survivor-of-multiversal-war known as He Who Remains (Jonathan Majors), finds himself zapped into a new reality when his lady self slays the omnipresent being. The mind reels!
Creator Michael Waldron takes delight in the endless possibilities of Loki’s core premise. And as a veteran of Rick and Morty, he knows what anchors a mind-bending show, and what will keep Hiddleston’s character hurtling through his chaotic, rewritten future. Below, Polygon talks to Waldron about landing on the key choices of Loki season 1, what to expect from season 2, and a bit on his next project, the wrestling drama Heels, which is set to premiere on Aug. 15.
Did you know there’d be a second season of Loki from the beginning or was that choice made later in the process?
Michael Waldron: We always knew that it was a possibility. We always knew that we wanted to propel Loki and these characters out into the MCU after this, into further stories. But that didn’t really crystallize as a sure thing until we were in production and everything. And as we were really figuring out the finale.
So you were still cracking the ending as you shot the show?
There was a hiatus due to the pandemic. So things were constantly being retooled because of that. I think, by and large, everything with He Who Remains and the Sylvie-Loki conflict was always there. But that cliffhanger was the sort of thing that suddenly became a really appealing opportunity, a chance for that to lead into a second season.
What element of the series helped you crack the macro story of Loki, and made all the other pieces fall into place? Each episode almost feels like a standalone adventure, similar to Rick and Morty, but what helped it all click?
The first couple of weeks in the writers room was just laying out the individual episodes. It was very important to me that each episode stood on its own, and you could say “This is the Lamentis episode,” “This is the apocalypse moon episode,” “This is the Void episode.” I didn’t want it to just be cut up chapters and have one long continuous story. Obviously, we had to figure out the time travel for things to slot into place. I think a big idea for us was the way you get around the TVA by hiding in apocalypses. That felt like such a big, cool, exciting idea that it drove the action of episode 2, episode 3, and in a way it’s like Alioth is the ultimate apocalypse that He Who Remains is hiding behind. That sci-fi idea cracked a lot open for us. I know that after we had that I went home and I slept a little sounder.
Did adding the multiverse to the Marvel Cinematic Universe feel like blowing something up or expanding it, in terms of narrative possibilities?
In the same way that after the first couple Iron Man movies, and with the first Avengers, suddenly these movies were kind of going to space. Then we had Guardians. I think of the multiverse as another version of that. It’s new ground to cover, and particularly interesting because characters meeting other versions of themselves and other versions of people they know is... cool. That’s just a cool sci-fi concept! But I think with anything, as you expand outward, it only works if the humanity remains. It’s exciting to watch characters dealing with big crazy multiversal conflicts because we can see ourselves in them. I think you just have to hold on to the humanity that makes these stories work in the first place.
Did you go back to the Thor movies for Loki? Was there anything to find in the past of Marvel as you were paving the future?
Absolutely. I mean I watched them many times, contrary to what Twitter might think because I did some bits on there saying that I’ve never seen Avengers and I upset some people [laughs]. I have seen it many times. “Confirmed: Loki writer has seen Avengers and saw it before writing Loki show.”
In fact, I was watching all these movies on a loop in the writers’ room. I gleaned so much because you watch the evolution of the character. Avengers was particularly informative because our story picks up Loki right after that, but I also I found a lot of inspiration in Thor: The Dark World, a maybe sometimes maligned movie that I actually really enjoy. I just think there’s great stuff with Loki being tangentially responsible for the death of his mother, how he reacts to that. That is the start of his journey of that version of Loki’s redemption, so I was inspired by that.
What’s propelling the characters into season 2? Where are you headed in basic terms?
In season 1, you saw a lot of characters reckoning with and questioning their own glorious purpose, and that glorious purpose changing, [characters] realizing that that can change. Everybody except for Sylvie. I think she holds onto hers, which is vengeance, and to the detriment of us all, perhaps. And we’ve got a Loki who, at the top of our show, assessed himself as a villain and, I would argue, at the end of our show, has become a little bit of a hero. There’s nothing more heroic to me than fighting for the right thing and losing. You see that washing over him as he’s there back at the TVA, after Sylvie has knocked back there. And then he gets up because that is what heroes do — they keep going. So I think that you’re gonna see a Loki that looks at himself in a different way certainly that at the top of this.
Do you hope to explore more of Sylvie’s backstory in season 2?
I guess we’ll see. We certainly have our own rich backstory for her, stuff that didn’t get to make it into the show. Elissa Karasik, our episode 2 writer, wrote a lot of amazing backstory for Sylvia and everything. So those ideas exist out there.
And her version of Thor?
Tune in.
How did He Who Remains come about? Did you bring the character to Marvel or was that a character Marvel hoped to introduce?
I was pushing and our team was pushing early on in the writers’ room that it should be a version of Kang up in that Citadel, sort of fusing the mythology of He Who Remains with a little bit of the Immortus mythology. And that was a thing we were excited to do. And it became clear that it actually made sense for our story. The only way we were going to do it was if it made sense, but it was like, who had a better argument for creating the TVA to prevent other versions of themselves from existing then a guy as evil as Kang the Conqueror?
You wrote the upcoming Doctor Strange in the Multiverse of Madness — did Marvel hire you for that after Loki? Does the movie feel like a continuation of the show?
Yeah, that opportunity came as we were getting ready to start production on Loki. It was a pleasure. I got to work with Sam Raimi, a hero of mine. I was in London for five months making that movie at the top of this year. We had a blast. I think that it’s a continuation in as much as ever every Marvel movie is to some extent a chapter in an ongoing story, but these things are meant to stand alone and the most important thing about Doctor Strange too is making the most kick ass Doctor Strange movie we could.
Is Loki a two-part show now or are you invested in telling a longer story with future seasons beyond season 2?
Time will tell, but I do my hope is that season 1 stands on its own. We always wanted to tell a complete story there. And in whatever the next chapter may be will stand on its own as well.
Your next show, Heels, is already on the way. We got a big preview out of Comic-Con this year, but I’m curious about the scope of this story. You’re starting with two brothers running an independent wrestling franchise, but you’ve dropped the name “Vince McMahon” a few times — is this about the building of an empire? Would you liken it to The Godfather or Breaking Bad?
I always thought about it a little bit of a Scorsese-sort-of rise, and we’ll see if there’s a fall. Starting from humble beginnings and trying to build some crazy. Wrestling was certainly not always the empire that it is and that’s what’s interesting, to watch the evolution of a family-run wrestling business from something you do in your small towns and perhaps a national, even global empire. That would be a really compelling arc for a show over the course of several seasons. I’d be excited to explore that.
What’s the most dramatically fulfilling wrestling moment you’ve witnessed? What’s the bar for the wrestling drama of Heels?
It’s gotta be Hulk Hogan turning heel in the WCW. There was an invasion storyline, these guys from WWF, Kevin Nash and Scott Hall, came over and they were the bad guys. It was at a Pay-per-view and and they were beating up on the good guys that you love, and here comes Hulk Hogan in the yellow and red and he’s the hero. “The Hulk’s gonna get ‘em! The good guy’s here!” And then the Hulk just leg drops Randy Savage. That was the original Red Wedding. I just think about the boldness of turning him heel. To a little kid... I wasn’t even like a massive Hulk fan, but he was just such a mythological figure. What a chance that Hulk Hogan took as a performer, as a bankable kind of movie star at that point. That was bold, risky storytelling and it set off two years of amazing storytelling with Hogan just playing a craven, cowardly heel and just being so evil. I really respect the hell out of them for doing that. That was a great storyline.
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wickednerdery · 3 years ago
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Title: Save a Mobius, Ride a Loki Author: @wickednerdery Fandom: Loki, Rick & Morty Pairing/character: Loki & Mobius, Rick & Morty Rating: FRM Summary: “Mobius, no!!” Notes: This is a continuation of The Great Loki and something that’s been stuck in my head since before Loki premiered I’ve been dying to write, so I have. Knowledge of Rick & Morty is helpful, but not required. This story has adult content, language, and violence. For length, etc, there’s a Read More:
Loki scans the desert, wary he’s ended up where he began; where the TVA first collected him. The whinnying of horses on the wind and outline of an American frontier town in the distance indicates this is unlikely, which is a relief. He takes a few steps, then stops and turns back. “What are you doing?”
Mobius sighs as he fusses with the TemPad. “Trying to figure out when and where we are.” He stumbles through the sand as he attempts to keep up with the god’s long strides. “There’s something wrong with the specs, the settings maybe…” Then a thought blooms in the back of his mind, compels him to ask. “You didn’t do anything to it, right?”
“Of course not.”
“Loki…” It’s gentle warning, reminder. The TVA isn’t done with him, he’ll not simply let Loki wander off.
The tone, implication of it, offends. “I didn’t do anything to your blasted device!” He storms off with his own suspicion and settles under a Joshua tree to examine the gun he lifted from the old man. 
Mobius plops beside him, undoing tie as the god shifts to share the shade. “I’m sorry I accused, it’s just…” He’s Loki.
Loki ignores in favor of moving on. “I think the portal gun moves across time and space. We’re in another dimension entirely, see?” He shows the tiny dials, settings, on the device. “Your TemPad won’t work, because it doesn’t exist here.”
If the TemPad doesn’t exist, then reason stands that the TVA doesn’t either and the thought is mind-blowing - terrifying and exciting both. Mobius lived his life with the understanding that the TVA, the Time-Keepers, existed everywhere and (in a way) at every time, and yet...He examines the gun for himself, then hands it back. “I suppose that makes sense.”
“Enough exposition for the readers then?”
“I guess so, I mean, we don’t want to bog them down in the...”
“Talky talky talky.” They say in unison. 
“So...how do we figure out where we are then?”
“I’ve a thought.” Loki gets up, starts in the direction of the town, with Mobius quick to catch up. As they carry on he waves hand to change their clothing according to what he suspects will be most appropriate.
“Did you just change my clothes?”
“Of course, how else did you expect us to fit in?”
“No, it’s nice…” The agent looks over the dark shirt, cowboy boots, before taking off the hat to examine. “Impressive...Just...why am I all in black?”
“Because I’m in white.”
“Yeah...But why are you in white and then, you know, I’m in black?”
“Maybe I want to change things up? Think that’s possible? ” It’s said sarcastically, but Loki himself isn’t sure it’s not true. 
Mobius smiles. “If anyone could do it, it’d be you.” 
When they arrive the god scans the rough wood buildings, the rougher looking citizens that stroll and spit in the streets, with growing smile. This is a place he can enjoy, regardless of where or when it is. Eyes follow a woman in threadbare silk, breasts nearly out, before they find the double-gun holster of her companion.
"What you grinnin’ at, Saddle-Bum?” When Loki laughs the man grows enraged, pulls his gun.
Mobius curses and scrambles as chaos breaks out, just managing to push the woman out of the way of the gunfire. He tucks them behind a pile of barrels that spill liquor as bullets fly. “Stay down.” As the dust settles he glances out. “Loki?” He’s not cross, only worried.
The god only smiles, triumphant over the local bleeding out on his back. “Ah, there you are, Mobius!” That’s a relief.
The woman begins to scream. “Oh my god! You shot the sheriff!!”
“But I did not shoot the deputy.” Loki tips his hat with a grin.
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He should be angry, scared, but Mobius isn’t. Heart pounds not with fear, but at the possibilities. It’s one thing to study Loki, to interview and interact with him under controlled circumstances, but this is something entirely different. They’re off the proverbial reservation. This is a wild Loki and it’s thrilling. “This is crazy…” The corners of his lips lift in spite of himself as men drag the body away. “Lucky no one liked that sheriff.”
“Funny how often that happens.” Loki chuckles. “Shall we find a room then?”
“Two.”
“Mobius, really, I thought you would know better. If two beings are in this sort of scenario, there will only be one room and one bed available.”
"Come on, you really think the...powers that be are gonna pull that old trope out?”
Loki only chuckles as he swings saloon doors wide and cheers. “Your new sheriff is here!” The gunslingers, prospectors, and whores all turn and stare. Just stare. The god drops hands to hips, but smile remains. “Tough crowd.” He huffs his laugh, carries on to the bar. “May we have two glasses of your finest and two rooms please?”
“Sorry, just got the one available.”
“On, come on, really?” The agent is incredulous. “Did Loki put you up to this?”
The bartend and proprietor smirks. “You want the room or not?”
“The one room will do just fine, thank you,” Loki smiles out before grabbing the whole bottle rather than poured glass and heading towards a cards game. “Are you coming or not?”
It takes a moment to realize the saloon owner had no expectation of getting paid now, that Mobius was free to go to the table if he wished. He did and he did, settling beside Loki. “You know how to play this game?”
“I know how to play many games, from many different lands. Do you know how to play?”
“I’m sure I’ll get the hang of it.” Not more than a few hands later he’s nearly all the pot to himself.
The god is thoroughly impressed. “You lied.” He smiles.
“Ahhh, what is a lie, anyway?” Mobius smiles back. “Just a...” He shrugs. “Reinterpretation of the truth.”
“You get that from your space lizard employers?”
“Nope.” He sets another winning hand on the table. “I got that from you.”
“Yer a cheat,” a player grumbles. “A liar and a cheat.” Mobius prepares to defend himself when the player turns to Loki. “And a lousy sheriff.” The god only laughs before the man grabs his wrist, digs into Loki’s jacket pocket, and pulls out an ace.
Guns cock in the men’s direction; one sighs, the other grins madly. 
“Loki, you weren’t even winning!” Mobius decries.
“Well I would have been, if you weren’t so good!” 
“Oh, so this is my fault?”
“Not completely.”
“Not remotely!”  The two men begin to devolve themselves into a shouting match, talking over each other as they plot an escape. “Are you ready?!”
“As I’ll ever be!”
“Good!”
“Great!”
Loki blasts the poker player holding his wrist along with two other gunslingers while Mobius socks the man beside him in the nose. It quickly escalates, spreads across the saloon like a tornado that draws in all manner of people around it. Chairs and bullets and glasses fly through the air. Mirrors and tables shatter, people scream, and through it all the god revels...and so does the agent. Until, that is, another gun fires from outside...Fast, futuristic, and deadly so both man and god hit the floor lest they get hit.
“I know you’re in there you portal gun stealing fuckers!” Rick rages from within his ship. It isn’t simply that they took his gun - they weren’t the first and he’d many - it was that he hadn’t discovered the theft soon enough. It was the hit to his ego. “Come out here now and maybe, maybe, I won’t squanch your ass!”
“Jesus, Rick, relax.” Morty doesn’t know why he bothers as his grandfather turns to berate him instead.
Loki pops up, begins to pull magic into his hands as Mobius braces on overturned table to stand. “Hide in the rafters” 
“The rafters?” Mobius looks up as Loki forms him an armored vest as precaution. “Are you kidding me? What in our history together makes you think I’m capable of something like that?”
“Then hide elsewhere, just let me handle the old man.” Loki gives overconfident wink.
Mobius sighs...This is it, this is how he dies… “I’ve a better idea.” He storms past Loki, strolls out into the street where the other two are still arguing in their ship.
“Mobius no!” Loki gives chase.
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As you can see, Loki’s got no trouble slipping into new, chaotic, worlds and having a blast while Mobius takes a bit longer to find his footing - this may change as Mobius continues to travel and finds his own way of making things work. Because the rascals couldn’t manage to finish their cowboy tale in one go, there will be at least one more piece in this Wild West world...Hope y’all don’t mind, haha! (”Saddle-Bum” is an old west phrase meaning drifter.)
All gifs made found on Google, combined by me, credit goes to whoever their OG makers are!
Those who may read: @holykryptonitekitten @lady-crowned-with-stars @ultrarebelheart @chibiyanai @dreamsofapiratelife @biiskuitx @delightfulheartdream @antoniostarshadow13 @mobiusbmobius​@zippythewondersquirrel ...If you wish to be tagged in future pieces, please let me know!
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xbloodrunsredx · 5 years ago
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Could you tell me what you think of the way the creators have instilled Rick and Morty relationship thoughout the show ? I've noticed that you're pretty good at explaining things so I was wondering if you wanted to showcase the "proofs" of their relationship. Anyway I love your fanfic "fire consumes fire" and I'm reading it right now, it's great !
For sure! Have fun with Fire Consumes Fire, it's my baby <3
I'll analyse season one for now and point out the creative choices and underlying themes as my proof! Let me know if you want to see more seasons though :)
An important thing to remember is that things like grooming and sexual abuse are not just about touching someone or being touched. Things like exposing a child to/forcing a child to watch a sexual act, speaking to a child in a sexually explicit way, and undressing yourself or them (typically older than the age they'll need to be bathed for that one) all count as aspects and types of sexual abuse.
Now some people might think that's less important because Morty is fourteen and at that age where male sexuality is a little more domineering but, canonically, Rick has been in Morty's life since he was twelve at most, possibly younger.
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(Rick celebrating Morty's 13th birthday: Mindblowers)
There's a lot of time missing, and if we're assuming that Rick's attitude has remained consistent, then it means this has been a common theme since Morty was prepubescent.
The first episode is relatively tame, but it plays an important role in establishing the family hierarchy, and does a lot with the ever infamous megaseeds. There have been a lot of fanfictions about the seeds and for good reason - though not overtly sexual in nature, it establishes a certain level of control over Morty. Morty lacks bodily autonomy and the ability to tell Rick no. He does what Rick says, even if it means sacrificing his own body, and it is the first step the creators took in creating a warped dynamic between them. It sets the stage for further abuse of power by Rick, which is important to make the future episodes realistic and true to character consistently. Somewhat separately, throughout the show you'll see me note instances where you can see the show easing us into sexually explicit interactions between the two - we are desensitised to Morty's blatant sexuality before we're introduced to Rick's, which is really interesting considering who they are. The difference is that they need to put in more work to make Morty someone viewed through a sexual lens in an effort to get us used to him and how we'll see him portrayed in the future. Then they introduce Rick's sexuality, and even later how their sexualities interact with each other.
This next episode draws directly on the assumptions we make based on the first episode about sexuality, and expands even further. When incepting Morty's math teacher, we now see a focus on Rick's sexuality - he involves himself in bondage in a sex dungeon in front of Morty, and encourages Morty to participate. This time we see Morty deny him, clearly not comfortable with it despite being intrigued. Something really interesting is Summer in this episode: while some may not think it's important in relation to Rick and Morty's relationship, her trying to sleep with them establishes the first theme of incest we see in the show and sets a playing field: the creators are saying it's their show and they can make who they want to be sexual to who they want.
Something else I think is important in season one is that after heavily sexual episodes, we get a break where the following episodes are family based. That's why we're skipping anatomy park for now, to go into episode four: the episode where Rick undresses himself, forces Morty to undress, steals his clothes and makes him walk around naked. Sure, his intentions aren't outwardly nefarious - there is reasonable evidence that Rick knew Morty was a simulation for a decent while, but I'll focus on if he didn't for now - but that doesn't make it less important to the development of abuse structures. Morty is incapable of telling Rick no when Rick puts his mind to doing something: the surrender of autonomy to Rick is really important for creating an abusive cycle. What if Rick had been lying? How would Morty have known? What could he have done? Morty gives in without really knowing what he's giving into.
Meeseeks and Destroy, in my opinion, is one of the most important episodes in determining abuse. Something I like to think about, is the central figure of Morty's life. Rick, right? When Morty chooses his own adventure, it's akin to him trying to reclaim his autonomy and trying to exert his influence. He tries to become his own central figure, and in doing so he meets Mr Jellybean. Two things happen as a result: Morty associates being in control of himself with getting assaulted, and we see a demonised version of Rick in Mr Jellybean. Hear me out! Mr Jellybean is the replacement of Rick in this episode as a figure that shoves Morty around, makes him uncomfortable, makes him do things he doesn't want to do, but with a sexual twist. Mr Jellybean's temper when he doesn't get what he wants and the sudden calm when he does, is eerily reflective of blackout drunk Rick.
We get a mix of a family episode and a sexually explicit episode here so I won't go into too much detail - but the distinct separation of Rick and Morty from the rest of their family when they leave creates a dynamic where Morty can rely on Rick as the only constant. It separates him from the rest of his family and the rest of the world in a lot of ways, which heavily contributes to his mindset.
The next episode is one where the creator definitely try and push a distrust by the family in regards to Rick and Morty's relationship. Rick lets Morty buy a sex bot while they're out named Gwendolyn - Morty adapts quickly and happily to his more sexually active lifestyle until he asks Rick to come upstairs. Beth says then: "Okay, now if we hear squeaking, we intervene." Rick is attempting to fix Gwendolyn and jumps on the bed, which prompts the entire family to come to Morty's room to stop whatever it is that is happening. Like I've mentioned previously, they follow really explicit episodes with family stuff - this episode somewhat follows that by splitting it in half: half is explicit and the rest has Rick and Morty separated while we take in the new information given to us. Beth thought Rick would have sex with Gwendolyn, possibly in a threesome or something - if the character believes it, then the creators wants us to believe it too.
The next two episodes are family orientated, where we focus less on Rick and Morty and more specific members of their family, we're introduced to a flipped dynamic via Evil Morty and his Rick. Morty ponders his own worth as Rick devalues his existence and treats him like one would an object which is another aspect of abuse that gets referenced in the future. My interest for now lies in the use of Mortys and how they're viewed by Ricks. Evil Morty perpetuates that and attempts to go about it in a Rick-esque way. Which, of course, means tying naked teenagers to the outside of a building - there isn't a need for them to be naked, but Evil Morty does that in order to push the idea of it being something a Rick would cook up while also turning on himself. The idea that there are good Ricks, bad Ricks and worse Ricks makes for an interesting idea that begs the question: if the Rick next to C-137 on the scale is believed to be capable of doing that to hundreds of Mortys, then what is our Rick capable of?
The last episode is undeniably tame by comparison and is another family orientated episode to make up for the last one. It is undeniable that a lot of work has been put into making Rick and and Morty's dynamic reflect that of sexual abuse and grooming, a theme that grows more apparent with every new season.
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daddyzanchez · 5 years ago
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An early Christmas-smut gift from your Daddyzanchez! I am wishing you all a great holiday with food, family, presents and love.
2000 words - erotica - F/M, Christmas, lingerie, dirty talk, vaginal sex, fingering, creampie
Link to story on AO3: https://archiveofourown.org/works/21921793
A Very Rickdiculous Christmas Present
When December started, Rick would usually start complaining, and when you tried out several techniques to get him into the Christmas spirit, like singing carols whilst cooking (much to his annoyance), he would usually say that the only spirit he could get into was that of vodka and then, with a shit-eating grin, he would hold out his little metal flask, a look of triumph on his face, before taking a sip.
“Rick,” you sighed, standing in front of him and pressing your hands into his chest, “It’s Christmas. We’re going to your family’s house on the 25th, aren’t you just a little excited?” 
“Chri-christmas is a wa-waste of time, might as well just have a pain-in-my-ass family dinner and bring a present,” he scoffed down at you, looking almost bored at the topic that usually had people on the edge of their seats in excitement, “Some guy walked on water and now people want to sh-share gifts to celebrate him? Don’t they know that they stole the whole concept from the Germanic peoples in Europe?”
“It brings people together, Rick,” you replied, hands sliding up to cup the back of his neck. You slide your fingers into the hair there, earning you a tiny smile from Rick. 
“So do funerals,” the answer made your smile fade and you sighed, rubbing his shoulders again, but Rick’s expression didn’t change a bit. 
“But it is about being with your family in a happy way and there’s also the joy of giving,” you tried again, pulling gently at the lapels of his lab coat. You pulled him down towards your mouth, but he hovered just above your lips. He was drunk; his breath smelled like alcohol and it made you crinkle your nose. 
“Y-you love the joy of receiving more,” he snorted and you let go off him with an annoyed sound and a roll of your eyes. Of course, he would turn a talk about Christmas into an innuendo. He let out a dry laugh at your face, “Sorry, baby, but the Christmas spirit is non-existent in me. I-I-I plan on being in the garage while we’re there, rather than listening to Jerry painfully trying to remember the words to s-several Christmas songs sung by Sinatra.” 
“Is that a challenge? Getting you into the Christmas spirit?” You winked at him, taking a few steps back to look at him properly. He seemed genuinely surprised that you hadn’t backed down already; apparently, he was not used to a person crossing him.
“Try me,” Rick simply replied, fishing out his flask, “You’ve already attempted at persuading with tedious stuff.”
“Are there any rules?” You put on a sly smile, tilting your head.
“There are never any rules,” Rick took a disgustingly large gulp of alcohol. He looked arrogant as he looked down at your face, too sure of himself to even think that you wouldn’t play dirty. Oh, how wrong he was.
*
The day at the Smith’s house passed just as Rick had said it would; him in the garage and the rest of you in the kitchen, snacking on the food whilst Jerry complained about maybe ending up not having enough for the actual meal if you continued, but as much as he was annoyed, he still hummed along to the radio.
Rick sat down at the table to eat, only to leave again immediately after. Even Beth couldn’t convince him to stay, and later, you saw her giving you a slight look of pity as you were unwrapping presents, “Sorry about him. I sometimes don’t know how you can stand him.”
“This? You know how he is, rambling on and on about the capitalist system making Christmas into a highly commercialised holiday, Beth,” you laughed, “I made a bet with him though, so we’ll see if I can manage to get him into Christmas spirit.”
“Rick? Christmas spirit? Right...” Jerry scoffed in the background. You turned to him, holding in a laugh as you laid eyes on the ridiculously ugly Christmas sweater you had given him.
“I have my ways,” you smirked, sending him a wink and Summer looked horrified as if she saw right through you. 
“Oh my God, gross,” she mumbled, getting out her phone to hide behind it. You just laughed again.
“Oh God, get the image out of my head,” Jerry cried and Morty soon caught up on what you had been implying.
“That’s gross!” Morty followed along, Summer snickering at her brother’s disgust.
“So that is why there’s no present from you under the tree for him,” Beth pointed out.    
*
The two of you (mostly Rick) had agreed on going home for the night. The car ride had been pleasantly silent, your head resting from the constant attention you had to give to the Smiths. Though Rick was silent too, he was silent in another kind of way, as if he was waiting - you figured that despite Rick having made such an effort to tell you how much he despised the holidays, he still danced around you after realising that he had yet to have gotten a present from you. What he did not know, was that you were his present. 
After you both came home, Rick immediately stripped to his boxers and went to bed. You kissed him whilst mumbling that you would be right there with him soon.
Now, you were finishing up in the bathroom and Rick was unaware of what you were doing. Never in your life have you ever had such trouble putting on lingerie; especially since lingerie made you feel embarrassingly unsexy to begin with. 
You looked at yourself in the mirror, and after what had seemed like an endless battle, some part of you laughed at the fact that it would take a moment, well, maybe a few moments at the most, before it was off again. The set was christmassy; a big bow covering your breasts and after trying three different approaches, you had managed to make it cover you up nicely and leave something to the imagination - at least until you pulled the bow and it unraveled.
I should have practised this beforehand, you thought to yourself as you walked awkwardly down the hallway and the walk to your bedroom seemed eternal. Whoever thought it was a good idea to make sexy christmas outfits clearly did not care about comfort at all because things were definitely going up places they shouldn’t and when you finally stood in front of the door, you had to reach down and pull a piece of silk ribbon into place. 
Taking a deep breath, you opened the door and Rick, who seemed to direct his attention at you to say something, only opened his mouth to shut it again. He was speechless and you grew nervous; the pose you had tried to strike faltering a bit, “Rick…”
The surprise on his face was there for several seconds, and you could have sworn that in the dimly lit room, you could see a blush creeping up his neck to his cheeks. Finally, he started to crawl across the mattress to sit on the edge of the bed, and whilst his eyes went over your scandalous outfit, you felt beyond relieved that he had not laughed at you. 
“Hoe, hoe, hoe, aren’t I lucky?” Rick whistled at you and you could only start giggling, taking a few steps as he beckoned you with his finger, “I-is this my present?”
“What does it look like?” You walked over to him as close as possible and by instinct, he reached out to place his hands on your hips.
“Can I unwrap you?” Rick asked, his hands running up your body to brush his fingers over the red silk of the bow “Now?” 
You pondered the question for a moment but then gained a boost of confidence; you did look sexy after all. It made you push him down onto his back and straddled his hips, and before he could protest, you leaned down to whisper at him, “Unwrap me? That’s not how we do it here, I want you to rip it off of me, Rick.” Fuck if your skimpy little outfit was torn, you had already agreed with yourself that you would not wear it ever again. In fact, you wouldn’t mind seeing Rick tear it to pieces before he fucked you senseless; that was how much you hated it. 
“Rip it, baby,” you cooed when his hands came up to bunch themselves up in the fabric. He looked hesitant for a few seconds but then pulled the outfit apart, the noises sending a shiver down your spine.
“Oh my,” Rick smirked as his eyes traveled down your now fully-exposed body, “Just what I wished for, h-h-how did you know?”
“I know you like the back of my hand, baby,” you removed the remaining pieces of fabric, throwing them onto the floor before leaning down over him to brush your lips against his. It was not exactly a kiss, but it also was not, not a kiss, “Now tell me, what does my baby want for Christmas? I could suck your big cock? Let you fuck me on all fours - sit on your dick, ride you? You’re free to choose.”
“Fuck,” Rick groaned beneath you, trying to arch his back so he could meet your mouth with his own, but you pulled back as he got closer.
“Choose,” your voice was smug as you knew that when he had blood running to his dick, he could barely think, let alone make a choice, “I know what I want but this is about you…”
He seemed to pull together all the brainpower he could muster, and if it had been you, he would’ve sent you a remark on how he could practically hear the cogs turn in your head. Don’t strain yourself, he’d say.
Suddenly, he managed to manoeuvre you onto your back from where you had been on top of him. Finally.
“There we go,” you cooed up at him as he knelt in front of you. You let your legs fall open to make yourself irresistible, reaching down between them to spread yourself open with two fingers. You could feel your heartbeat in your pussy, sensing a tingle as you grew wet from him starting to come closer, “S- what is it gonna be?” 
“I’m still deciding,” he mused, crawling to position himself between your legs. He shooed your hands away, cupping your whole cunt in the palm of his hand. It made you want to grind against it, but he was too busy inserting two fingers into you and twisting his wrist so he could press them upwards against your g-spot. 
“Decide- oh, decide faster,” you shivered, eyes fluttering closed to focus on the two digits slowly making their way in and out of you. 
“I thought this was for me,” he teased, reaching up with his thumb to rub your clit in small circles. You felt yourself get more and more aroused, his fingers in your cunt starting to make an obscene wet sound.
“This isn’t exactly doing anything for you,” you arched your back as he pressed his fingers upwards again, “I think you’ve misunderstood… I’m yours tonight. You can do whatever you want.”
“Fine, y-you want it like that? If you wanted to be treated like a little toy you got me for Christmas, you should’ve just said so, baby,” Rick pulled his fingers out of you again, leaving you empty without as much as a warning. His change of character was exciting, a little frightening even, as you weren’t sure what was next. It had you incredibly wet.
With a pleased grunt at the gasp you let out, he grabbed your hip to flip you onto your stomach. Fuck yes. 
He spent little to no time making sure you were comfortable, keeping up his promise that you were not the centre of attention right now, but merely just an item that he could get off on; a pretty little thing to stick his cock in. It meant that you felt his big cock slide inside of you in the next moments, causing you to gasp and curl the sheets between your fingers. 
“Fuck,” you swore with gritted teeth and Rick simply chuckled behind you, moving slightly on the bed and you could feel every jerk of his body inside of you. 
You slowly felt his weight on top of you, reaching back to cup the back of his neck to get him as close as possible. He let himself be pulled down, moving your hair out of the way and pressing a lazy kiss to the back of your neck. 
He then started fucking you, showing no intention to take it slowly and build up the tension smoothly. He was rough with you instead, crashing his hips against your behind and sending you nearly flying forward from underneath him. 
You quickly learned you had to hold on for dear life if you didn’t want to tumble onto the floor at some point. Though the whole ordeal made it impossible to find the power to do anything but cry out - the feeling of his thick cock inside of you overpowering every other point of interest right now. It burned too deliciously
“Rick!” You chose to call out his name to stroke his ego, then added a bit extra as soon as your head wasn’t swimming from a particularly hard thrust, “It’s- ah, it’s so good, baby. No one fucks me like this.”
It resulted in you feeling a hand come up to fist itself in your hair as soon as you had finished the sentence. He had liked that then, and you suddenly felt his damp breath against your ear. He tugged harder at the tufts between his fingers and made it clear that he wasn’t doing it to be playful. Had you said something?
“You make it sound like there’s m-m-ore guys than me,” he half growled and half moaned. There it was: Jealousy over nothing. Usually you would’ve told him off, but right now it was sexy… The possessiveness that was triggered by a meaningless attempt at dirty talk. You wished you could see his face; the sweat dripping from his brow as his hips ground into you, his intense eyes and utter disgust at the idea of you being with someone else, followed by the need to remind you who did it best.
“Even if there was, I’d come crawling back for your cock,” you chuckled breathlessly, struggling to get through your sentence as you felt your cunt clenching around him, “No one compares. No one can make me come like I’m about to quite like you.”
He swore as he sped up, wanting to come as much as you, “Yeah?”
“Yeah,” you confirmed with a wanton tone to your voice. You could feel your orgasm building, your toes curling and above you, Rick’s breathing was laboured and only getting more frantic. 
“I’m gonna come,” he announced. You reached up to grab at the back of his neck like before, pushing your behind against him so he could go deeper. He hit the perfect spot.
“You better fucking come in me,” you demanded, seeing stars, “Shit… There, oh my God, there!”
Your words turned into incomprehensible babble as the first contraction of your orgasm washed over you like a wave. You clenched around him rhythmically, coaxing his orgasm to time with yours. 
It worked. You heard your name being yelled in the next moment and felt a hot gush inside of yourself with Rick coating your walls with his come. He might have said that what the two of you had just done had only been for him, but he stayed inside of you - knowing you loved the intimacy - for as long as he could muster until he softened and slipped out.
“Mhm… That was lovely,” you murmured when he rolled off of you. He chuckled in response, reaching for the box of tissues that was strategically placed on his night stand and handed a bunch of them to you.
You turned onto your back and wiped yourself down as well as you could before getting out of bed to clean yourself in the bathroom. You spotted the torn fabric on the floor, deciding to get rid of it tomorrow.
When you finally crawled into bed again, Rick was already under the covers and on his side. He was waiting for you, and much to his delight, you scooted as close to him as possible.
He kissed you on the lips, “Merry Christmas.”
“Wait…” Your face turned smug, “What did you just say?”
“You h-e-eard me, and I am not repeating it.”
“You do know that you’ll never hear the end of it, right?” You felt giddy, pulling the covers over yourself as well.
“Goodnight,” he grumbled.
“Don’t you mean Christmas-night?” You teased.
Rick sighed.
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sally-mun · 4 years ago
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So one of my favorite details of your RP 'verse is the idea of "Sonic Boom" as an in-universe TV show. So I'm curious if there are any other in-universe TV shows, movies, and/or books that have gotten any attention or that you've given any thought to? :3
AS A MATTER OF FACT, yes there are! But before I go into that, some context for those that aren’t aware of what @gojira007 is referring to:
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Within the RP, the show “Sonic Boom” exists in exactly the same way it does in real life. It was made by overlanders, for overlanders, and it’s essentially a fictionalized/propagandized version of the actual events of the Sonicverse history and backstory -- and it’s outrageously offensive to basically any non-overlander. It not only trivializes the very real atrocities that Robotnik/Eggman committed, but it plays those things up for friggin’ comedy. In addition, everyone has really weird proportions because overlanders are used to long limbs and torsos, they portray Robotnik in a very generous way between his physique and cutesy/harmless behavior, and the show even low-key ships Sonic and Amy “because they’re both hedgehogs and would go better together.” The only difference between Sonic Boom within the RP and Sonic Boom IRL is that the RP version doesn’t have Sticks, because she’s not a public figure. Anyway, needless to say the show was the source of international uproar.
AND WITH THAT OUT OF THE WAY, on to other in-universe media!
So let’s get the uncomfortable one out of the way: The RP had a big MLP influence for a while. REST ASSURED I’M CRINGING ALONG WITH YOU AS YOU READ THAT. Basically my RP partner was a hardcore brony at the time, so I wove some MLP elements into the game because I knew it would make him happy. Basically the idea was that Equestria was a very closed-off part of the Mobius map and very much kept to itself, until the day someone started filming a reality TV show there called Equestria Girls and chronicled the lives of the Mane 6. This was mostly played off as an easter egg for my partner, and as such Finitevus was a big fan of this show. This one has pretty much become a relic of the past, however, as we’re all well aware of how toxic and straight-up uncomfortable it eventually became to even admit to being an MLP fan, and my partner kind of operates nowadays as though his brony-ness never existed. As such, we don’t refer to this show anymore and kind of don’t acknowledge that this bit of world building ever existed.
INSTEAD, we now focus on Sticks’ favorite TV show, Forest Friends! This is an RP version of the Animal Crossing franchise. “Forest Friends” is a semi-educational cartoon that’s a huge hit at the moment. Sticks probably wouldn’t have even gotten into the show at all, except one day her Gramma Lara got her a couple of Forest Friends dolls as a get-well-soon gift when she was recovering from surgery. This led to Sticks getting into the books, which led to her getting into the show, which led to her wanting more toys, which has now led to her bugging her dads about wanting more Forest Friends stuff all the damn time. Recently she had a meltdown because there was huuuuge hype about a new Friend coming to town -- Raymond -- and she just HAD to get the new book and doll about him... but he was sold out everywhere! Lots of panic and sobbing over that one, h’oh boy.
One of my personal favorites is a book series that we’ve only referred to very lightly in passing called Jerry Potter. This amuses the shit out of us because, although we’re not imagining the character to be an overlander, we ARE both imagining the “Jerry” in question is based on Jerry from Rick & Morty. We imagine the Jerry Potter series is a story about an utterly inept loser of a wizard that’s trying to bumble his way through wizard school.
This one is VERY obscure, but another show within the game is called Fall Down Bear. This one refers to a very tiny detail in an INCREDIBLY obscure game called Illbleed. Within the game (which is super weird but oddly fascinating, do yourself a favor and check it out), there are a couple of scenes where a TV will turn on and show about 5 seconds of a show called Fall Down Bear, where a brown bear walks for a bit and then falls down. This show is actually a favorite of Knuckles, largely because slapstick humor is more or less the only humor he had for most of his life. We imagine the show is probably more skit-based and centers around Fall Down Bear trying to get through very mundane situations, but always managing to have SOME kind of mishap that results in him falling down, sometimes in elaborate Rube Goldberg types of ways.
I thiiiiink that might be all of the noteworthy ones. It’s at least all the ones that come to mind. If I think of any others, I’ll do another post sometime!
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sairenharia · 5 years ago
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Sentimonster Theory
My own thoughts on this theory brought up by the episode Ladybug. Spoilers ahead.
1. Validity Of The Idea.
First off, Ladybug introduces this idea of a sentient Sentimonster. Not something brought up before, albeit we’ve only seen a few Sentimonsters so far. We know very little about the Peacock Miraculous ourselves, but just what we’ve been shown and told. Such as we know it’s broken, though not necessarily how.
But Ladybug said her Sentimonster was her own being. Since the series is from her perspective and the Sentimonster agreed to act with her, we can take this as a truth to a certain extent. Which is honestly all sorts of messed up. In particular because we are introduced to this concept only a minute or two before this sentient girl is then erased from existence.
If this was a generally dark show with dark concepts in the vein of Rick and Morty, then maybe this could be a one off. But it’s NOT. This is a generally light hearted show that glossed over a girl just got grant freedom and then died and barely played with that idea. Really Ladybug should have been a two parter and that Amok should have been a hot potato so we could explore Sentibug’s mental state and ability to choose.
But wasted potential aside, a light hearted show does NOT bring up something that grim dark and NOT have a payoff. Which means one of two things.
There will be a sentient Amok arriving and they will be a thing for a while, possibly Felix, possibly someone else, and there will be some kind of witch hunt or stab in the heart.
Or there is already a Sentimonster present within the show and the pay off will be finding that out. No one makes a Chekov’s gun like that and not use it.
2. The Candidates.
Who could be a Sentimonster? Obviously only those close to the Agrestes. The Agrestes themselves, Nathalie, Gorilla being the obvious ones.
I’m disinclined to believe it’s Emilie because they say she disappeared. Not ‘gone’ which is what’s usually said when shows don’t want to say ‘dead,’ but disappear. Gone implies they know what happened. Disappear means they don’t. So I really think it’s her body in the basement. And the reason she’s in a coma is because she’s  the one who made the Sentimonster.
Gorilla is the next one I find hard to believe if only because the Agreste’s are rich enough to just buy a man like that. He’s dedicated to his job, he’s a beast of a man, but he hasn’t done anything to warrant his worth in being put into a magic coma when money would do. And while a likeable guy on his own, we haven’t had enough focus on him to warrant the emotional payoff a sentient Sentimonster warrants. And personally, it puts a bad taste in my mouth making the mute person the secret inhuman being.
Gabriel certainly has the crazed focus that would be assumed of a Sentimonster. They are made with a purpose in mind, and if something unfortunate happened to the real Gabriel, then it makes sense Emilie would make him even at the cost of herself. But Gabriel would also be made by Emilie, and if she’s even half the saint Adrien paints her as, then it seems far more likely Emilie would be focused on him being back for her AND Adrien. Even if he struggled with the emotional, I doubt something like Riposte or Gorizilla would have happened with a Sentimonster Gabriel. Plus that would just be needlessly painful for Adrien because not only does he learn the man he thought was his father was the villain he’s been fighting for months, his dad is also probably dead. It’s like kicking a dog when he’s down.
Nathalie seems pretty likely if Emilie knew something was going to happen to her. Her job is to take care of Gabriel and Adrien and Nathalie does genuinely show care for both. She’s helped Adrien get what he wants, she will do anything Gabriel asks of her. For someone who seems to a not particularly passionate person, she loves two extremely socially inept people fiercely. If there was a guardian to be left behind by Emilie, Nathalie fits that criteria. The biggest question for this idea is the idea of an Amok being able to use the Peacock Miraculous itself. That seems like it shouldn’t work, but there’s nothing that says it can’t either. But even the Butterfly Miraculous has to be removed before it’s user can be Akumatized.
Then there’s Adrien. And oh boy, does a lot of things start lining up when looked at it like this.
3. The Narrative.
The thing about stories is things don’t have to be strictly in universe to reveal a truth of the story. That’s the fun of being an audience. We know Gabriel is Papillon because we’re the audience, so we see things the people in the story can’t. And the thing about Miraculous Ladybug as a narrative is there’s supposed to be a happy ending.
This is a show meant for kids. And while kids can handle dark things, Miraculous Ladybug is again, not that kind of show. The longer things go on, the less chance it seems like Adrien can have a happy ending, especially with the way they handle things between him and his father.
Adrien is getting closer to his father, but Gabriel is just diving further and further into his villainy. He keeps hurting people, he’s caused Adrien in particular some horrifying things from the times he’s died, to his three months as Aspik, to having him attack the love of his life. That sort of thing wears on a person and from Adrien actions in Gamer 2.0 and Partycrasher, both of which are after Viperion, Chat is certainly suffering from those three months. Finding out Gabriel did that to him is going to hit and it’s going to hit hard.
In particular for a point everyone has been talking about since we figured out it was Gabriel: he’s terrorized Paris to save his wife, while he treated his son like dirt. Gabriel is a man who seems intent to do anything and everything he can for love, much like Adrien does, but he also treats Adrien terribly. Their home situation is toxic at best, and abusive at worst.
Finding out the truth is going to break Adrien. More than that, with all Gabriel has done, and has treated his son, its hard to see how any end of this could allow enough room for Adrien to forgive Gabriel enough to be happy himself.
Unless, of course, the circumstances aren’t what they seem.
4. The Evidence.
Most evidence comes from what we, the audience, see, as well as some presumed things of Sentimonsters.
A. Cataclysm.
In Miraculer, Adrien gets hit with Cataclysm. Much to everyone’s surprised, he doesn’t turn to dust from something that’s turned harder things then flesh and blood to dust. We’ve seen it destroy indestructible items like the Bee Miraculous. We know Plagg killed the dinosaurs.
The first assumption is Adrien survived because he’s the Black Cat User, so he’s got some resistance to his own attack, or perhaps it’s because Miraculer was using the ability and thus it was a weaker version of it.
But here’s the thing. There’s that narrative thing again. Adrien got hurt. He got hurt real bad. We rarely see these kids hurt thanks to their supersuits, and here Adrien is, getting hit with his own death touch. This is something that, one it’s own, should have been an episode. This could have been great character development, they could have talked about the dangers of their job, or show a lot of Ladynoir, or how stubbornly stupid Chat is to fight like that.
But this wasn’t an episode about it. This was an episode about Chloe being Queen Bee, and meeting Mayura, and a five superhero team up, and a power stealer. All those things are episode worthy, so having Chat injured is odd. Especially since it wasn’t necessary where it was.
Miraculer had already established her threat levels, Ladybug had left to give the other Miraculous. She only finds out Chat is hurt when she’s handing off the Bee to him. If it was a matter of getting Chat to disengage, there’s many ways where Miraculer could have tossed him away as many Akuma have done. There is no reason to go that extreme. He certainly doesn’t need to be hurt for Mayura to have still grabbed the Bee like that, and struggling against two opponents is reasonable. There is no real narrative reason for him to be that hurt. The only point it MIGHT make sense is it meant Chloe really did have to go after Mayura herself.
But then it’d have made more sense to have him hurt on the rooftop. It would make the fight seem more high stakes because we don’t know how long it’d take, it makes everyone afraid, it’s dramatic! So why have him suffer half an episode like that?
Because the episode was overly full. It was to distract from what happened. There would be questions of why Chat is lasting this long, is this how it always is with people, or just him? Instead there’s the distraction of the new villainess, Ladybug needs to get the MIraculous, she needs to tell Chloe she can’t be Queen Bee. She has no time to wonder about Catacalysm, and Adrien doesn’t like dwelling on the unpleasant.
But we the audience see it. Adrien can take a Catacalysm and he can last a long time under the effects. And only one other thing has.
Reflekdoll, the Sentimonster Lady Noire used the power on. A thing made of pure magic. It was messed up, but it still functioned. It freaked out because it had no controller, but what if it could control itself? It may have done better, instead been dealing with it’s slowly breaking down body instead of wildly attacking everything.
Much like Adrien.
B. Adrien And Taking Charge.
Here’s the thing about Adrien taking charge: He’s terrible at it. We see it in Mister Bug, we see it in Viperion, we it in in Evillustrator. Adrien does not do well in that position. He gets too easily flustered and gets stuck in a tunnel vision or too emotional.
He’s great at second in charge! When he knows generally what he’s supposed to be doing, he’s great. He knows to protect, to teach, to comfort. He’s shown to be clever, a point actually made in Reflekta when he helps despite not having powers. Which makes it stand out even more when he struggles to do so in Reflekdoll. The difference being he’s no longer support, he’s the one whose supposed to be ‘in charge.’
He struggles as Mister Bug.
He uses Second Chance for Three Months because he can’t calm down, step back, and calmly watch things go down so he can gather information.
And all the way back in Season One, he has Marinette take away the stylus because he can focus on protecting her, but he couldn’t think of a good way to get the pen away, and he misses an obvious way out of the box.
We know Adrien is smart. We know he’s clever enough to keep up with Ladybug’s plans when she needs him to do something. But the moment he’s in charge, it’s like something in his brain just shorts out.
C. Adrien And Memories.
So something that has bugged me for ages is the fact he was not allowed out of the house until he got to go to school. He’s been locked up his whole life. Which made sense when I thought his mother disappeared years ago and his father became overprotective as a result. Then we learn his mother hasn’t even been gone a year by the time Christmas rolls around.
That changed a lot in regards to Emilie.
In Jackady, Chat’s outburst reminded Gabriel of Emilie. Which implies she was a woman who was at least somewhat of a spitfire. Someone Adrien saw as kind and who wanted him to be good. The person Adrien thinks about right before he almost destroyed the Christmas Tree and he stopped. Kind and willing to fight.
And still agreed to isolate Adrien.
And before she disappeared, Gabriel was supposedly less severe as he is now. Now this could be evidence that Gabriel is the Sentimonster, but with both Gabriel being at least a little more caring and a woman Adrien sees so highly, it’s weird they both agreed to raise him in basic isolation.
Not that I’m saying Emilie is anywhere near Gabriel’s level in canon, but Adrien is definitely looking at things with rose colored glasses. It’s not okay to raise a kid isolated from their peers like that. Especially a ray of sunshine like Adrien whose desperate for friends.
But at the Agreste parents very best, they were overprotective as hell.
We know Adrien is starting to realize his father is being unfair and overly harsh, we’ve seen him run away because of it, and he’s terrified of being locked up. He still sees Emilie as this saintly way though.
It may be because she made him. Of course he’d see her this way because she wouldn’t think there was anything wrong in wanting to protect him or she wouldn’t have gone to that extreme.
D. Adrien’s Demeanor.
Adrien is obedient. He’s a good boy who listens, and does as he’s told. Again, Adrien does not like to take charge. He rarely starts confrontation for his own sake, but he’s willing to step in for others. More so as Chat than Adrien, and Adrien is certainly more sneaky and subdue about it.
A Sentimonster is a being made to obey someone else. It’s not a giant leap to assume a sentient would still be highly inclined to obey, and more likely to stand up for others than themselves.
Then there’s Adrien’s more obsessive nature. Because let’s be fair. He’s obsessed with Ladybug. Most of the time it’s charming flirts of the safe nature, but he’s had times he’s let it distract him from the job, or made him sulk and pout. He can usually snap out of it to focus on the job, but it’s weird how he can go from one day handling his rejection with grace to the next handling it absolutely terribly. Like maybe he wants to accept it, but it’s hard to do so for a being whose usually focused on one person.
After all, Sentimonsters are protectors. Getting a little obsessed with who they’re made for makes sense.
E. Adrien’s rebellion.
It’s an interesting to note how Adrien rebels. He does things his father wouldn’t approve of, but usually goes the route of ‘what he doesn’t know won’t hurt me.’ If Adrien is told he can’t, he’ll go ‘but Chat wasn’t told he can’t.’ It’s rare we see Adrien disobey an actual direct order from Gabriel.
The only time that comes to mind as direct disobedience instead of just never asked or a technical loop hole was when he ran to school. You know. Right after he got Plagg and experienced chaos energy for the first time.
And yet, for the things Adrien deems truly important, he does try to bargain with his father. Like seeing his mother’s movie, or going to Marinette’s party, because these are important things to Adrien, and he wants his father to approve.
Oddly, when Adrien actually pleads and breaks the rules and shows how important a thing is to him, his father seems inclined to give it to him. Which I’ll get more into later.
F. Plagg, The Peacock Miraculous Was Right There, How Did You Miss It????
Listen, Plagg is a little gremlin who cares a lot more for people than he likes to show and it still seems weird he wouldn’t recognize a piece of jewelry he’s been in contact with for centuries when he could recognize the BOOK.
But that’s the thing, Plagg is a little gremlin who cares a lot. Who cares a lot about Adrien. Who, you know, he regularly fuses with and gives superpowers. There’s a good chance if Adrien is a Sentimonster, Plagg knows, and now he’s like ‘SHIT’ about the whole thing.
It’s likely Fu getting the Peacock Miraculous would spell the end of Adrien, so Plagg is hoping for an Alternate Solution to come up before he outs where the Peacock Miraculous is. He’s like millions of years old, he can be patient for a few years until he sees something, and the humans can take a little chaos in their life. Adrien’s HIS.
G. SYMBOLIC FORESHADOWING.
Gosh, copycat sure was a sculptor ‘in love’ with someone he couldn’t reach.
There sure is a lot of False Adriens and False Chats in the season where Mayura is a player between the wax statue of Adrien, Chat, and Adrien playing Chat’s Voice in the Ladybug Movie, and Lila pretended to be Chat and Adrien for a while in Chameleon.
Chat keeps being turned into a meat puppet by Gabriel an awful lot.
Reflekdoll got Catacalsymed by another Chat.
Miraculer sure was about Chloe’s friend trying to become another person for her love, while her other friend was living through something we never thought should be livable by a human.
Chat did think the Sentibug was a real person and choose her first.
Ladybug said Sentibug was too perfect to be human. While Gabriel and Marinette both call Adrien perfect. And Lila, and I think Chloe. Basically a lot of people call the boy perfect.
Thomas has a tendency to make tweets about ‘in universe’ views on the characters, thus when he said Chloe was a terrible person who would never have a MIraculous. And he sure calls Adrien perfect a lot himself.
H. Allergies.
Allergies are the immune system’s hypersensitive reaction to something. Worried about something being a threat even if it isn’t. And Adrien is allergic to feathers. A thing he may be made out of.
Maybe Sentimonsters don’t play well with feathers, maybe another feather can mess with theirs, I don’t know, but I find it very interesting one of his parents had a feather based superpower and he’s allergic to them and it feels like that should mean SOMETHING.
I. The Promise.
Gabriel talks to Emilie about a promise. A wish. A way to reverse a mistake. He never says he’ll bring her back or fix her, which is the obvious thing. He’s cryptic which means whatever he WANTS, it’s not as simple as saving her. He says it the way he does because we the audience aren’t meant to know yet.
5. The Wild Mass Guessing.
Because the rest was super coherent.
Two other points: A pure theory on Party Crashers. Gabriel is shocked at joy in his house, which could just be him realizing how many people were there, or an even more disturbing thought that he never expects joy from Adrien. OR it could be Gabriel can’t sense Adrien at all because he’s a Sentimonster, and neither Nathalie nor the Gorila are big on the joy spectrum;.
As for Chat Blanc, it could be Chat Blanc will be a seperate Sentimonster (and MORE foreshadowing????), or it’s because Plagg is also involved. Plagg is definitely a full entity, after all, and that may be enough to allow for an Akumatization.
BUT here is how I see things going down.
Adrien Agreste died, somehow or someway, probably preventable, and it was with his parents so it didn’t become news.
Emilie, unwilling to lose her son, decides to use the peacock. She may have sculpted something like Mayura did Ladybug and he’s got an Amok hidden around somewhere. Maybe Emilie used his body which is grim and also necromancy. It could be a lot of things.
But the Peacock is NOT the Miraculous of Creation. A Sentimonster is a temporary creation, a guardian, it’s not meant to be a longterm sentient being. Having a Sentimonster capable of some intelligent thought is understandable, because better guardian then, but it’s NOT meant to be a person.
Emilie pushes and this is what breaks the Peacock Miraculous. And this puts her into a coma because now she has to support Adrien’s existence with her own emotions and it’s too much of a burden for her to bear and remain conscious.
And Adrien the Sentimonster is born.
At first, he doesn’t have a lot in the way of emotions. This works out because now he’s supposed to be mourning his now disappeared mother and being blank is pretty understandable. He has the memories from his mother, maybe his father, he knows generally how he’s supposed to be, but he’s still figuring it out. Meanwhile he thinks it’s the depression because he doesn’t know he’s not real.
And Gabriel?
Gabriel lost his son, then his wife, and now he has This Thing in his home. Who thinks he’s his son and his wife almost lost her life for it and he has to. Deal with that. So he goes complete hardass because if he has to deal with it, then it would represent the Gabriel brand well. He models, he learns, he becomes the poster boy of a perfect son.
Adrien doesn’t understand why he’s being treated so coldly and he chalks it up to his father also being in pain at losing his mother. It makes sense.
Then Chloe demands to see Adrien and, well, telling Chloe no doesn’t work for long. And when Gabriel is ignoring Adrien, and Nathalie knows and is just being a professional, and the Gorilla is going about business as normal, Chloe just sees her depressed friend, and at some point there’s discussion of his wanting to go to school, to make friends, because Adrien is REAL. He’s a Sentimonster, but he’s REAL because that’s what Emilie wanted.
And real people crave love and affection eventually.
So Chloe gets him into school. And Adrien goes and passes his test with Fu. Because Adrien was always a kind and caring boy and a Sentimonster helps.
He’d forbidden.
And he meets Plagg and he’s magic and that feels right in the world.
And suddenly he’s not just Adrien. He’s Chat Noir. He has a purpose. He has people he can PROTECT and he is so eager to do so. He has powers he expects no hard limit to. He has a partner he has to work with.
He comes alive. There’s just been a pit of loss and need and yearning and suddenly he has that and more and moreover, he has a little bit of chaos on his side. Chaos that takes this order he’s been given.
And says no.
And Nathalie knows she has to tell Gabriel.
And he’s so, so very surprised. Because Adrien should not have been able to say no. And he thinks maybe, just maybe, Emilie did leave him a son after all.
So Gabriel let’s Adrien go to school.
Adrien’s birthday comes. Gabriel would always buy his son a gift. He can’t bear the thought of getting him a new fountain pen, a useful tool, a professional tool, because he’s still not sure he’s invested, so he puts the responsibility on Nathalie for the first time.
Jackady happens, Gabriel almost died, and all he could think about as he stepped away from the ledge was he almost left Adrien alone. And for the first time he hugs this boy who might be his son.
He destroys his office because it’s easy to pretend to be mad about this boy he might love and he hates he may make him lose his wife and perhaps his firstreal son. And yet the concern once he’s purified isn’t near the act he wishes it was.
Riposte becomes a test. Could he put the boy in danger. And he finds he hates himself more by the end of it then any other time.
Christmas, he decides to show a little care, maybe embrace this, and he’s terrified when he’s gone. Not enough to forget his wife and other child when an opportunity arises, but he finds himself wanting to make him happy when his friends show up.
Adrien starts asking for things. He pleads to hang out with his friends. He make arguments. He WANTS. He wants because he wants to be there for his friends, he makes a hand made gift because someone is important to him. These are not the actions of an obedient beast. Because that’s the thing, when Adrien begs, Gabriel gives in. And when Adrien wants to know more about Emilie, see her in other things, it shows someone whose view of her isn’t only her own self view.
He’s terrified when he thinks he might be Chat Noir. He has to be sure, he has to know NOW because he seems so very real and whether or not he is, he finds himself loving this Adrien and he doesn’t want him to be Chat Noir, and yet he does when he fall because the thought of him dying-
He even ponders giving up his wife for this boy. After he put him in danger. After he almost fell apart into glitter. He can’t bear to lose him too, he’s sure of it.
Adrien is growing. He’s learning to love others. He’s learning friendships. As Chat Noir, with chaos and purpose in his hands, he acts with abandon. He has love, he can protect, everything is clear.
But when Ladybug suffers and he’s unable to help, he just because more desperate and determined to save her next time. Even if it takes well over twenty thousand times and three months because that is his PURPOSE, so next time, he throws himself off the stage, and he won’t listen to Fu.
As Adrien, things are still confusing. Adrien wants to defend, but he also wants to be good for Gabriel, and making a scene is bad. Still, he sees Lila hurt people he loves, he cares about, so he decides to that being underhanded. If sincere earnestness doesn’t work like it does with Chloe, then he’ll make sure Lila knows if she won’t be his friend, then he’ll find a way to make her regret being his enemy. It’s not as direct as he likes, but he must be good for Gabriel to.
Gabriel is becoming more desperate by the day. He must save Emilie. He must save their son. And maybe this boy is their son? Maybe Adrien’s soul was there because they were so similar. He doesn’t know, all he knows is he needs the Ladybug and Black Cat Miraculous and once he has though, he can make everything RIGHT.
And there is the thing about happy endings.
As canon stands, Adrien is unlikely to get a happy ending. Because as the series progresses, he BONDS with his father. They seem to be getting closer, healing this rift that had been between them. If Adrien is to get out of this, he should be recognizing his unfair treatment, pulling away, getting farther to see how bad the situation is. Not getting closer. The closer he gets to Gabriel, the more it’ll hurt because how does he make peace with that? This man terrorized the city of Paris for his wife, while he barely gave his son the time of day.
And that’s if Gabriel doesn’t die using the Miraculous to save Emilie. Then Adrien will lose his father to get back his mother after his father didn’t even give him good memories to leave off of.
But the story changes if Adrien is a Sentimonster.
Because Adrien’s existence is draining Emilie. She can’t wake up while he exists. And Gabriel is a man who loves so fiercely and doesn’t want to love this boy, but DOES because how can he not? So like his son, so like his mother. So it becomes even more important to win, so Adrien will never know what his existence has cost Emilie, to make sure Adrien’s existence is never threatened by the loss of the Peacock.
Everything will hurt, but it’s not a man who choose a nearly lost wife while completely forsaking his son.
It’s a man whose nearly lost both and trying to save both.
And maybe, just maybe, the cost of stabilizing Adrien’s existence will be a cost he can bear instead of asking someone else to die.
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ramheavenandhell · 4 years ago
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Rickceiving Love and Forgiveness
AN: I wanted to write something involving the One True Morty and something about Rick finding salvation or something, so this little piece was born. Didn't exactly turn out as I had expected, but I hope you'll like ^_^ Warnings: mentions of character death, angst, platonic love Summary: Rick's time has finally run out and his imminent death is unavoidable. In a last attempt to make peace with himself, he visits the Mortyism Cult to meet the One True Morty.
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Rickceiving Love and Forgiveness Rick chugged the last contents of the bottle down before he grumbled and threw it carelessly in the backseat of his space cruiser. He was internally scoffing at his own wretchedness. Mocking himself mentally for even being dumb enough to travel to where he was currently going. It was common knowledge that Ricks didn't believe in the existence of god or something like the afterlife. Religion was only something that had been made up by people to extort money from dumb and gullible sheep. So, it was ridiculous that he was on his way to see someone that was supposed to be some kind of prophet. 'What does it even matter now?' Rick wondered. 'This is already the end. And nothing matters anyways… never had…' He fumbled for another glass bottle on the bottom of his ship, hoping to find one that wasn't empty yet. Despite not wanting to believe in any religious bullshit, the point was that Rick was going to die – very soon. It was just his luck that he had contracted a deadly illness that couldn't be cured – not even by Rick Sanchez himself. So, this only left him with one last option. To just accept and embrace his upcoming demise. The reason why he was on his way to such a remote planet now was because he had overheard some rumors. Apparently, some Ricks had been visiting this one person that everyone called only the One True Morty. Rumor had it, that Ricks who were close to death would visit him to…"lighten their conscience" was probably the right phrasing for it. Of course, Ricks weren't innocent people. From stealing, drug and weapon dealing, seducing mafia bosses' daughters, ranging up to blowing up entire solar systems, their crime records folders were thicker than the book "War and Peace". And sometimes people just found it easier to accept their own death when they were able to accept the sins that they had committed. It was one particular rumor though about one certain Rick that had picked his interest the most. This Rick was said to have been suicidal, but before offing himself, he went to see the One True Morty. It was said that after meeting that Morty, the Rick had come back as a completely changed human. He didn't try to kill himself and was supposed to live even now as the happiest Rick in the entire multiverse. Of course, that rumor sounded too sketchy to be really true, but it made him wonder if meeting this special Morty would give you some kind of epiphany or something. Well, Rick told himself that he had nothing to lose anymore. At best he could only gain something from this and if not… well, it's not like it really mattered. Emptying another bottle, he neared a little dwarf planet on which the cult had been relocated. At one point, the Mortys who followed the cult had lived on the Citadel of Ricks – as a minority, of course, that hadn't been paid much attention to at the time – however, after they found the one that had been dubbed the One True Morty, they had moved off to this tiny planet. He began to land on a decent sized platform, which resembled a parking lot. It was mostly empty, but there were two or three other vehicles there, which looked exactly like his own. It was a little reassuring to know that he wasn't the only Rick who had come to pay the One True Morty a visit. After he got out of his space car, he walked over a little platform that led towards what must be the reception building. Inside of it, he found a few Mortys clad in brown robes bustling about. One of them, who wore pure white garbs instead, immediately approached him. "Hello, lost one. How can I help you?" he asked in a calm and quiet voice. Rick wondered if the other was currently drugged because his eyes were half lidded and the way he talked sounded pretty odd. And what was up with "lost one"? Deciding to ignore that – just like the stupid red face paint – he finally answered. "I'm here to see the One True Morty. Do I need an appointment first or is he free right now?" "Of course, you can meet him now. Please follow me." The Cult Morty murmured. Rick walked after him as he was led out of the building through another entrance and they approached what must be the main building. He studied the palace-like structure with disdain. It was made of white marble and adorned with lots of gold. The scientist sneered. This cult seemed to be just like other religions that were only after other people's money in order to gain wealth. Even if this cult was founded by Mortys. "You either charge your followers a lot or you keep running a pretty busy business." Rick commented. "Oh, our cult doesn't charge. The services of the One True Morty are all free. We keep living from the donations that we receive from the followers of the One True Morty." The Cult Morty explained, not looking offended by the other's accusations. "Donations? Really?" Rick lifted on side of his eyebrow. Looking at this grand temple made it hard to believe that that was really the case. The Morty seemed to notice Rick's disbelieve and explained further. "Yes. Some of our donors are wealthy and powerful Mortys, but we also have some Ricks who are blessing us with gifts every once in a while. This building for example had been donated by a Rick who thought that our previous housing wasn't worth for the One True Morty." Of course, Rick wouldn't be able to know, but when the Mortys had started the cult, they lived literally in a garbage dump. They had built a little makeshift hut with what they could find for the One True Morty and that had been it. This cultist had been there on the day when the generous Rick had left the humble hut and looked around the dumping grounds with new and clear eyes and then proclaimed loudly that this wasn't living conditions for anyone, especially not for the One True Morty. The donor thought that the blessed one only deserved to live in a palace that would represent the same beauty that the One True Morty represented even though no building would ever be able to come close enough to it. Rick wasn't exactly sure what to think anymore. So, a Rick had let this entire palace be built for the Morty that he was going to see now… Must have been one heck of a revelation that this guy had gotten if this was his way of saying thanks. He didn't comment further on the topic and just silently followed the boy inside the building. They walked through some hallways before the cultist stopped. "Please wait here while I inform the holy one of your arrival." With those words, Rick was momentarily left on his own. The place was eerily empty and silent. Occasionally he would see a Cult Morty scurrying through one of the corridors, but that was it. With all the white, polished marble, the place seemed also very sterile. Normally he would welcome such surroundings, but somehow he felt very uncomfortable even if the hallway that he was waiting in was lavished with carpets and a comfy-looking sofa as well as some chairs. However, he remained standing even if he had no idea how long he would be left to wait. Instinctively Rick reached into the inside of his lab coat and fished out his flask, taking one big gulp and noting sadly that this was rest. He re-pocketed his now empty flask and could only continue to wait. After what felt like hours, but could have been no more than ten minutes, the Cult Morty finally returned. "The wise one is now ready to see you." Again, the boy led the way and Rick just wordlessly followed. As they walked through the hallway, another Rick came from the opposite direction. He looked relieved and had a bright smile on his face, walking as if all the weights that life had ever put on him had been lifted. Rick only raised one side of his unibrow and wondered if he would look like that when he was going to leave, too. It was hard to believe, then again, he didn't really care that much about it. The Morty stopped in front of a doorway that was only covered by a piece of cloth, lifting it to the side and urging him inside. A funny remark was on Rick's tongue, but he kept his mouth shut and entered. He had actually halfway expected to be led into a small, darkened room that would only be lit by candles or something like that, so the bright spacious room, which had huge open windows that reached from the floor all the way to the ceiling were a little surprising. Even more surprising was the sight of the one who must be the One True Morty though. Rick really didn't have any idea what the other was supposed to look like, but since he was a Morty, he figured that he would look like—well, just another Morty, of course. The boy on the other end of the room was certainly a Morty – he had the round face and round eyes – but instead of the pubescent boys that he was so used to see, this one looked more like a grownup or at least like an adolescent that was far older than just fourteen. He was clad in white robes that were open in the front, revealing a defined chest and a six-pack as well as a strong, long neck. Instead of the short brown curls that awkwardly adorned his grandson's head, the OTM had a Mohawk. Shockingly his left arm was replaced with a mechanical one. It looked like an intricate piece of art and was made out of gold. Rick was immediately reminded of the "Golden Touch" that he had heard about in rumors. The oddest thing about this boy was the golden light that was surrounding him. The scientist would have been convinced that it was just a set up for ambience and the light came actually from somewhere else and just shone on him if his eyes weren't radiating a bright light of the same color. "Please come closer, Rick." The One True Morty spoke. His voice was calm, but thankfully sounded more normal than that of the cultist from before and his friendly gaze was also not weirding Rick out as much. Finally getting out of his rigidity – he hadn't even noticed that he had just frozen up on the spot and staring – Rick approached the other. As the Morty motioned to a floor pillow in front of him, the older man took a seat. "I-I heard about other Ricks who came here." Rick started the conversation a bit awkwardly. "So, I decided to give it a shot, too, I uh guess…" "I know why you are here, Rick." The other replied, still with the same calm voice and friendly expression on his face. "Oh, you do?" the scientist's brow lifted in equal surprise and disbelieve. "Then we can just cut the chitchat and go over to you doing your magic number or whatever it is you do." The Morty closed his eyes and regret was edged into his features now. "There is no "magic trick". And I cannot cure what you have. I know that it is not what you want to hear, but your quickly nearing death is unavoidable." Rick's face fell and he was surprised that his opposite knew about that. "Yeah, I figured that much already." "But that was not the reason for why you came here anyway." The other continued. "No, it isn't." The scientist agreed. "I'm here to clear up my conscience or-or something like that. I guess." "Why do you think that you need to do that?" Rick's mouth formed a thin line. He didn't like that this started to sound like some kind of therapy session. But then again, this was what it was and he knew that before he came. "Well, I guess I don't really have to tell you that. Especially not to a Morty. It's pretty obvious, isn't it? I mean, I'm a Rick!" "You Ricks do not want to believe in the afterlife, yet you fear that you might end up in hell for the things that you have done in your lifetime." The One True Morty summed up. "And while it is true that you may have committed many sins, your self-flagellation is pointless. For all the things that you Ricks do, you are not monsters." "Not monsters?!" Rick sat up straighter. "You've got to be kidding me! I-I-I knew this one Rick for example. He—he and his Morty once got stuck in a collapsed cave and do you know what he did? He survived by eating his Morty. He ate his own grandson! So you can't tell me that Ricks aren't monsters!!" "That was merely out of self-preservation. I do believe that his Morty would have done the same if they would have chosen for the Rick to become the sacrifice." The One True Morty looked unfazed by what he had been just told. Then he asked as if Rick's outburst had never happened, "Just why are you afraid of something that you do not believe in?" The scientist's mouth fell open and he stared for a moment with wide eyes at the out-of-this-world boy. "I… urgh. You're right. This is stupid. I shouldn't have come here." Rick got up and was about to leave. "And now you want to run away like a coward? Have you not done this your whole life already? I had the impression that you came here because you decided to stop running." The old man halted as One True Morty continued. "Obviously, you did not really come here just to confess. And this also is not about you being worried about going to hell." "No." Rick turned back around again. "Your nihilism is the only problem here. The fact that nothing matters, not even your impending death." For a moment, they just looked at each other before the elder sighed and took a seat on the pillow again. The talk wasn't over yet. "I must inform you that I cannot help you with that issue." Rick opened his mouth to reply, but the Morty lifted his mechanical arm and continued before he could say a word. "I simply am the wrong person for you to talk to. However, I can help you smooth the way so you can receive what you are searching for." As if the words weren't confusing enough for the scientist already, the actions that came from the One True Morty afterwards were even more so. The boy leaned forward and his mechanical arm reached out to touch Rick's shoulder. It didn't just stop there because the scientist was suddenly pulled forward as the Morty's other arm reached around him. Rick found himself suddenly in a hug and on top of that, the One True Morty moved his head forward to give him a kiss on the forehead. A weird, warm feeling spread through Rick and he wasn't sure if it came from the touch of the mechanical arm, or the other's golden aura or was it just from being hugged by a Morty – he had no idea why or what it was! Soon, he was released from the embrace again and the One True Morty grabbed a paper and a pen that laid by his side and began to write something on it. Rick was still frozen on the spot, stuck in some kind of trance-like state almost and only was ripped out of it after the boy had finished writing and handed the note to him. Dumbfounded he looked at the folded piece of paper. "Fly home now, Rick, and give this to your Morty." Rick finally took the paper, curious as to what was written on it, but not daring to look at it. He had a feeling that he was not supposed to see it since it was written from one Morty to another and while he usually wouldn't care about something like that and also didn't believe in superstitions, he was sure that something bad would happen if he did. So, he just pocketed the small slip of paper and stood up. The One True Morty smiled at him and wished him a save travel. Rick didn't reply, still feeling confused and whatever it was what the other had done to him when he touched him. As he passed through the hallways back towards where he had parked his space cruiser, he slowly came out of his daze and finally took notice of his surroundings. The white marble walls looked beautiful and bright and he hadn't noticed before that there were some patterns on them. On the outside, it was even more beautiful. The air was warm and crisp, the sun shone gently and the sounds of singing birds and an occasional breeze could be heard. For some reason he felt lighter as he walked with a much straighter posture and while he may not have noticed it himself, he wore a small smile on his face. The mood that he was in didn't falter on his way home and the thought of dying soon wasn't as dreading as it was before. Rick had always hated having to face his own mortality. Even if he always acted as if nothing mattered because if someone precious to him died, he could just move to another dimension where they were still alive, he always hated thinking about his own end – no matter how unavoidable that was. After all, he lived a dangerous life-style. Not only the adventures and battles against all sorts of alien mercenaries and intergalactic governments, but also his habit of abusing alcohol and other drugs. Yet, while it may seem to onlookers that he was suicidal, he clung to life like a beast. Even knowing that it was all in vain and would eventually amount up to nothing, he kept on fighting against death for as long and as hard as was possible for an almost god-like human. Of course, he knew that it would make no difference how long he stayed around or even if he had been born at all. Ricks died all the time out there in other dimensions and he'd once visited one in which he never even came to exist. The universe doesn't care about such things. It will continued to exist and expand whether Rick was around or not. It had done so for millions of years and will continue to do it for millions of years more. That thought had made him miserable for such a long time and he actually loathed the universe for it, trying to plunder it and show it his middle finger as often as he could. He took it for a ride and tried to hold on as long as he could, but the universe would always throw him off again in the end. And yet, as he looked at all the stars, solar systems and asteroids that he zipped past on his way home, he couldn't hate it. He admired its beauty, looking at it with the same eyes that his grandson had looked at it the first time that he had taken him out to space. Morty. He needed to see his grandson. The little dork that he constantly treated like a pet or accessory. Rick knew that he was a bad grandfather for always dragging the brunet on dangerous adventures, abusing him for his own selfish whims and on top of that treating him like shit. He had never said how much he loved his grandson, how much he enjoyed his company, how flattered he was by his cute little hero worship or how proud of him he was when the boy showed that he had learned a thing or two from him whether it was something about his inventions or about aliens. While Rick wasn't one for bonding – at least not openly, at the risk of others mocking him for it – maybe now that his end was near was a good time to make up for it and tell him. However, first he should give him the note. Rick still wanted to know what the One True Morty had written, but he resisted the temptation. For some odd reason he was sure that all of his happiness – as little and as fleeting as it may be – would be ripped away from him if he even so much as peeked at it. He landed the ship in the driveway and entered the house through the open garage door. On the workbench laid a half-finished device that he had tried to tinker with before he gave up in frustration and sallied to the dwarf planet on which the One True Morty was located. He sunk into his swivel chair and looked at the wires, screws and other pieces that were strewn around. Out of habit, he reached into his lab coat and retrieved his flask, unscrewing the cap and guiding the bottleneck to his lips before remembering that it was empty. Now that he was back, he could actually refill it. Rick did have a small fridge installed in one of the shelves where he stored some emergency spirits. Instead of swiveling over to get it, he just placed the empty flask on a free space of the workbench and ignored it. "Hey, Rick. You're back." A round head with brown curly locks peeked inside the garage. Warmth flooded Rick's chest at hearing and seeing the boy and he couldn't help the sad smile that sprouted on his face. "Hey, Morty." He softly replied instead of making a comment how the boy had just stated the obvious. "Is something wrong, Rick?" Morty worried a little at seeing the unusual facial expression on his grandfather's face. "Kind of. But it's not really important." Rick replied, but his features didn't change. "I have something for you." He reached into his lab coat and pulled out the piece of paper. The brunet looked at the note in confusion before he accepted, unfolded and then began to read it. Whatever was written on it couldn't have been very long because he was finished in a matter of seconds. Morty looked stunned before he turned his gaze back to Rick and looked at him oddly for a moment. Then he suddenly hugged him, the piece of paper falling onto the ground. Only the words 'Please forgive him.' were written on it in golden ink. Yet it seemed as if there was written so much more than just that small, simple sentence. "I love you, Grandpa Rick." Morty said and hugged him as if it was the last time that they'd see each other. And maybe it was. Not that his grandson would know since Rick hadn't told anyone about his illness. Even if he wasn't entirely sure how much time he still had, he was sure that it wasn't much. The scientist was stunned by his grandson's actions at first and tears began to well up in his eyes. He returned the hug, but despite the fact that he had started to cry, he was smiling. Rick felt that it was much easier to accept his death now. He knew now that he had been truly loved in his life. And even more, he knew now that he mattered. Even if it was only to his Morty, Rick had mattered.
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AN: Although I had this laying around for a while because it felt off and I wanted to fix it, I still wasn't quite able to figure out what exactly is wrong with it. So, since I'm running out of stuff to post, you get it in this form even though I'm not quite happy with how it turned out…
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kootenaygoon · 4 years ago
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So,
He looked tanned. 
Spencer took a luxurious drag on his Belmont, the ember exploding like a mini-supernova in his aviator sunglasses, and exhaled swirling spirits into the early morning mist of Diefenbaker Park. It was two days after Christmas and I’d left my pregnant wife and baby daughter at home to visit his memorial bench, the day after my sister died, and together we sat looking down at the central pond in the distance. I liked that he’d finally grown out his beard again, so that it had a scraggly surfer quality. The afterlife was agreeing with him.
I sighed. “The crazy thing is I’ve been grieving this shit for years, you know? Like I knew this could happen any time, any moment. And then the universe custom-designs this perfect French Exit for her. It was like it was staged,” I said, unpacking the one-gram pre-roll I’d picked up from Vancouver.
“Like think about this: Kristina went into labour on Kathryn’s birthday this year, then one day later Celista is born. Now she dies exactly nine months later, to the day. There’s some weird math there I can’t figure out.”
Spence smiled. “You’re always looking for the patterns.”
There was sweat collecting in my hairline. I’d gotten four hours of sleep, maybe, and I’d smoked half a pack of cigarettes. My family was circling the wagons hard, my other sister flying back from Belgium, and I was being inundated with social media engagements. I knew what was on everybody’s mind: this was exactly the sort of event that could send me back into my hyper-manic tail spin, put me back in the psych ward for the third time.
The thing was, Kathryn was more than a sister. She was me. With our matching dolphin tattoos, our matching blue cars, our blonde hair and our outrageous emotions. She was the female version of me, the sister whose soul was most entangled with mine. For years I’d assumed that one day I would end up derelict in her basement, while she played at domesticity with her healthy suburban brood upstairs. 
She had my back when nobody else did.
“I know she’s still here, man. But I can’t talk to her yet. So I wanted to come to you, you know? See if she’s made it to the other side,” I said. I was crying now, taking puffs off the spliff and blinking heartbroken at the baby blue sky through the clouds. 
Spence took off his aviators. I hadn’t realized he was crying, but now I could see his eyes were red-rimmed. For a moment I wanted to lunge for him, to touch his face with my hands. Then I remembered that he wasn’t there, that he’d been dead for years. Our last meal at Royal Jubilee flashed before my eyes, the way he looked with Canuck-coloured toe nails in his boss robe. Goddamn, I loved him. 
“You know I loved your sister,” he said. “She was family to me.”
I nodded, took another drag. The last time I saw Kathryn, in the basement of our house, she was wrapped up like a Pharaoh in her bedsheets. I touched her little cheek, with Celista riding on my hip, and told her that she wasn’t alone. That she would never be alone, that we were right there with her and death wouldn’t scare us away. With my siblings lined up behind me, I kissed her forehead and ran my hands through her duck fluff hair.
“You were perfect to me.”
Spencer shifted uncomfortably. He hated when I got too demonstrative or weepy, mostly because his emotions made him uncomfortable. Years earlier, when we’d lived together in Victoria, he had a short-lived fling with my sister. I envisioned them being together, making him real family, but the circumstances weren’t right. Shortly later she was married to someone else.
Spence sighed. “I don’t know if I should tell you this.”
“What?”
He took another drag off his Belmont, then ground it into the grass. Slowly he began to explain to me how the afterlife works, how your soul stays connected to what’s going on in the contemporary timeline for a while, but eventually you transcend that. You stop haunting your friends, you stop wondering what’s going on in real time, because you’ve ascended to another plain of being. One with beaches.
“For a while there I was checking in on Taylor all the time, you know, and Shannon. It’s so much easier to be a Facebook creep once you’re dead. I know so much shit I can’t tell you yet,” he said.
“I know everything that happened to you before you met me, and I know everything that’s going to happen to you. I’ve read the whole story now, but we’re not supposed to give spoiler warnings to people who are still alive. That’s not how life works.”
I coughed a few times, and nodded guiltily at an elderly couple walking by with their dog. I hoped they hadn’t seen me talking to myself. I took a deep breath through my nostrils and tried to imagine how Spence’s consciousness was reaching me, whether this imaginary figure before me was a legit spectral presence or just another fucking delusion, like the time I thought J.K. Rowling was my Mom and G.R.R.M was my Dad.
Spencer bit his lip. “We’re not really allowed to intervene, is the thing. So I know when bad things are going to happen, but I can’t do anything to stop them. I’m at peace with it, but those are the rules.”
My heart was beating a little faster. “You knew. You knew this was going to happen and you didn’t tell me.”
A tear dribbled into his beard, and he pulled out another Belmont. “I’m sorry, man. I really am. I would’ve done something if I could’ve. I swear.”
Now I was really crying in public. “I was like twenty feet away, man. When she drew her last breath. It was like I knew I had to be closer to her, like she pulled me back into her orbit. I didn’t know what to do. I don’t know what I could’ve done. I could’ve done so many things,” I said.
“What-ifs are useless, man. You did what you could. You all did. She picked a fight with a demon and it killed her. That’s all there is to it.”
I was starting to get annoyed with Spence, like the time we went on vacation together and I spazzed out at A&W because he complained about the colour of the pickles on his burger. I was going to the trouble of conjuring up his apparition, I figured at least that he’d say something comforting. But that was the thing with Spence, he always told the unvarnished truth. Even when it was uncomfortable.
“So what’s this thing you were going to tell me?”
Spence took a few trembly drags, his fingers shaking. He took a long moment after exhaling. “When I found out what was going to happen to Kathryn, I told you I couldn’t change anything. I had to watch it happen, just like you. But while you were sleeping, I went into Kathryn’s room.”
“You did?”
He nodded. “She was laying on her face, half under the covers, wearing those designer white jeans. She looked so precious, Will. Like Marilyn Monroe.”
I gasped. “Or Princess Di.”
“Exactly.”
I’d never seen Spence this emotional. His eyes were like the Grinch’s as he took another puff. He looked off towards the sand cliffs, and the waterfall where we used to come to drink back in high school. He was pausing because he was trying to work up the courage to say what came next.
“So I crawled into bed with her, Will. I put my arms around her, with her face to my neck, and I cradled her like she was a newborn. I knew she couldn’t hear me, but I whispered to her that I’d be waiting on the other side. With her Gran Dad. I told her she didn’t have to be afraid anymore.”
My joint was finished now. I pulled out a cigarette, and Spencer offered me a light. Was this a pleasing fiction, or was I grasping at some legit truth from beyond the veil? These were exactly the sort of strange thoughts that would get me in trouble, but I needed to have them. I needed to let them out. And I needed to believe Spencer was telling me the truth.
He smiled. “But I didn’t even get to the best part. This is some real Rick and Morty shit.”
I snorted. “What?”
“Again, the metaphor isn’t perfect, but time doesn’t exist once you’re dead. Everything is happening all at once, like the Tralfamadorians in that one Vonnegut book.”
“The Sirens of Titan, right.”
“So the thing is, I’m talking to you right here but you’re also hanging with me in the afterlife already. We’re all together here. And when I went into that room, I wasn’t the only one there. Your whole family was there, and not just the nine of you but all of your aunts and uncles and all these other people I didn’t know,” he said.
I couldn’t believe it. “They were all there?”
“Packed in, shoulder to shoulder. All her boyfriends had to wait out in the living room. Then there was her swimming friends, her Sauder girls, her B.C. Ferries crowd. There was so many people they couldn’t even fit in the basement suite, so a bunch of them were out smoking in the driveway. And you know who else was there? Celista.”
I wanted to believe him so bad. “Would you believe that, if you were me?”
Spence shrugged. “Probably not. All I know is what I saw. And everyone wanted to be there, to let Kathryn know she wasn’t alone. That includes you. The future you was there, like a Force Ghost from Star Wars. And you were so proud of her for how hard she fought. She was a Jedi.”
“I’ve never heard you get this maudlin before. I mean, you didn’t even believe in God. This shit sounds pretty bonkers.”
He laughed. At first it was just a surprised blurt, but then it escalated into body-shaking belly laughter. He wiped his eyes.
“What’s the joke?” I asked. “I don’t get it.”
Spence’s eyes gleamed with mischief. 
“We are God.”
The Kootenay Goon
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joecial-distancing · 4 years ago
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2019 in review in review:
A few years ago I started tracking yearly goals, books read, movies watched etc in a year, along with overview blurbs, in private posts. End of 2019/beginning of 2020 I was really frazzled/burned out about a lot of stuff and just never finished up making the thing. 8 months later, got the urge to read back what I’d got done, then figured I’d maybe go ahead and see about finishing. 
Media tracking below the break. thoughts/blurbs written in 2020 italicized, 2019 not.
~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~_____________________________~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~
Didn’t do so hot on explicit personal goals, but had a lot of stuff go ok around them this year.
School’s been fine/better than fine.
Job’s probably the biggest failing. Still with same job, haven’t made the firm moves to jump off, dragging my feet too much on exploring stuff w/ Columbia/NASA GISS.
Did not get better with covid, lol
Dating life still non-existent, but I’ve registered on apps, gotten more comfortable with selfies, improved general social life dramatically, been flirted with, updated my wardrobe, and generally started to get comfortable accepting that I’m a hot person.
Somehow got extremely better during covid.
Books
Grant (finished)
We stan a taurus legend
Guy was good at exactly one job, and was fortunate enough to have been in the right place/right time to get to do it.
Mort (discworld)
Definitely best discworld I’ve gotten to so far.
Don Quixote p. II
Really entertaining in a way that part 1 wasn’t; I was shocked how much the meta element landed for me.
Consider the Lobster (DFW collection)
had zero context on who DFW is/was when I read, and still don’t exactly tbh. Wanted to wait for a pause in The Discourse before diving into more of him, but dunno if I’m ever going to get that.
Crime and Punishment (revisited)
Weirdly didn’t get much more out of this than I did the first time I’d read it
Better Than Sex (HST Gonzo papers)
Xerox/widespread fax accessibility opening citizen access to mass media in a manner really reminiscent of what social media would go on to do at a much larger scale. Has a much more deliberate narrative arc than the other gonzo papers collections, also has that excellent HST richard nixon eulogy
The Brothers Karamazov
SPQR
Slouching Towards Bethlehem (Didion collection)
Pet Sematary
Not my favorite King, but not bad
Sourcery (discworld)
still funny/charming, but Mort really made clear/reminded me how much the hapless sadsack Rincewind mold of protagonist wears on me after a while.
The Devil's Teeth
My Year of Rest and Relaxation
Liked it a lot more once I realized it was doing a Fear and Loathing thing.
Homage to Catalonia
This should be the Orwell that gets taught in schools. Make it a followup to All Quiet on the Western Front or something, jeez.
Lyndon Johnson I
Having now finished all of them, this one’s probably the least-interesting but sets up a bunch of important context that the others still then feel the need to retread.
The Razor's Edge
Recommended to me as a “white guy discovers eastern mysticism” book, but also is more interesting in its treatment of that than I’d expected (helps it was written in the 40s). 
Cat's Cradle
There’s a part in this where Vonnegut’s making fun of people who try to bond with strangers over being Hoosiers, and my dumbass immediate thought was “ooh, Vonnegut’s a hoosier? Me too!”
Lyndon Johnson II
Robert Caro felt compelled to apologize for spending so much words lionizing Coke Stevens, segregationist opponent to Johnson’s senate run. His goal was pretty clearly to show lbj’s lack of campaign charisma by contrast, definitely definitely overcommitted in his own narrativising.
Libra
I want to go back to this after reading some more De Lillo.
Gravity's Rainbow
This book absolutely kicked my ass
Overstuffed and referential in a specific way that really keeps me hooked in instead of put off. When I learn about some piece of cultural context that I retroactively recognize as being referenced in this, I want to go back and reread the entire thing.
From Caligari to Hitler
Kind of fails both as film criticism and cultural analysis, but absolutely made me want to run for the hills when considering current relationship between mainstream movies and demands of pop culture.
I took a class on Weimar cinema in undergrad that I now realize was probably biting pretty heavily from this and never once referenced it.
Movies
Venom
Movie itself is not as fun as the Tom Hardy hype coverage. PG13 was the absolute worst space to aim for, PG- or R- versions of this could have been a blast.
Harryhauser Argonauts
Was tripping when I put this on, and it was all kinds of fun.
2001: a Space Oddyssey
First time seeing this, all-time classic for a reason!
A Good American (the NSA doc)
Dr. Strangelove
Mel Brooks History of the World p. I
Not my favorite Brooks, best joke was at the beginning.
In Bruges
Had been a while since I saw a proper dark comedy.
Spiderverse
Fukkin awesome!
Visually great, and extremely better than usual superhero stuff for being aimed at PG instead of PG-13.
You Only Live Twice
Highlander (Revisited)
I watched The Old Guard on netflix recently and it mostly just made me wish I was watching Highlander instead, because at least Highlander knows exactly how goofy it is
Moonraker
The Good, The Bad, and The Ugly
Much like The Shining, I though this would have been 100% spoiled for me by cultural osmosis, but turns out it wasn’t, and even the scenes I had seen *totally landed* in-context still.
Kung Fu Hustle
Ichi the Killer
Really gross, really fun
Matrix Reloaded (watched thru highway scene) (Revisited)
The highway scene was not nearly as cool as I remembered it being.
John Wick 3*
Probably dumbest plot of all of them, best choreography. I like how every single fight had its own distinct flavor. “Knife museum fight” “horse fight” “halle berry dogs fight” 
Akira
A classic
Pet Sematary * (ugh, bad)
Why can’t john lithgow be in good movies anymore
The Revenant
MCU Spiderman
Fuck this was awful.
MCU Spiderman 2*
Really weird, complete Rorschach Test of a movie: it’d be totally valid to read into this that global warming is Fake News, for instance.
Lmao this was completely awful
Rites
Dredd (non-stallone)
oh hey Lena Headey’s in this
For All Mankind!
Watched in honor of moon landing anniversary
Lion King *
Watched it way too stoned, was like dark side of the moon + wizard of oz except instead it’s a lion king script reading + nature footage edited for lip syncing.
Once Upon a Time in Hollywood *
Many scenes of very long setups for really stupid shaggy dog jokes, which sometimes worked and sometimes didn’t. I do kinda want to rewatch now knowing more about manson, which I knew pretty much nothing about beforehand
Blowout
A good john lithgow movie
also I think I like travolta in things.
Lord of War
A Good cage movie
I like when Eamon Walker shows up in stuff.
Taxi Driver
A classic
Snowpiercer
Watched in a bar with only one speaker working, which is the correct way to watch. Weirder and funnier than I thought it was going to be, which still doesn’t make it good, but,
dbz big green dub
Exorcist III
Brad Dourif just tearing it apart
Deep Red (argento)
Suspiria (1977)
Watched the remake in 2020, which was ok, but nothing tops the Goblin score.
Elf Bowling
Thanks, Gnome
Parasite *
Interesting to me that this one seems poised to hang around people’s good esteem for a while
TV
FMA: B
Rick & Morty
Saw some episodes, generally pretty funny, some misanthropy that’s probably appealing to a certain type of teen al a something like House, but ultimately I don’t totally Get the intensity of discourse about it.
Leterkenny
Mob Psycho 100
One Punch Man
Deadwood
Watchmen
Only watched like half of it. Was playing around with a lot of hefty imagery/thematics, but didn’t really seem ready to rise above playing (tho also I feel like it’s weird on some level to *expect* them to rise above that in the first place)
Music
New Avantasia
HEALTH/ show
lol remember concerts
King Gizzard and the Lizard Wizard/ show
Just learned about King Gizz in 2019 and got completely obsessed with them. I don’t tend to expand my music selection very readily, and a lot of what I currently *do* know is old/inactive stuff, so it was/is incredibly exciting to have an active group with good momentum just immediately win me over like that.
Mistimed the edibles and ended up with a really good finale and a really long subway ride home.
New Yeasayer
Sad they split up
Steve Wilson Tull remixes
Aqualung’s a good album and the sound mixing’s kinda bad, so I liked this project.
Stonefield
Opened for Gizzard. Really good as studying music
Video Games
Civ VI: Gathering Storm
Hades
Turns out Supergiant’s design proclivities all work *extremely well* on a roguelike
Baba is You
Untitled Goose Game
Cute, if maybe a bit overhyped
finally fucking finished Pillars of Eternity
Had fun with it, but too long, and really dour for how long it is.
Pillars II
Kinda drifted off it eventually, but I do genuinely like that the flavor of the fantasy is colonial era rather than medieval.
There’s a Balancing Bastard Factions element where it’s like the writers are just being smartasses after a while. Having to go extremely out of their way to make siding with colonizers seem like a competitive option.
Pokemon shield
Cuphead
pisses me off, which was a nice outlet when I was stranded by flight cancellations during thanksgiving
Celeste
Also very difficult, but really easy to stay patient with, which is nice.
Disco Elysium
None of the discourse made me want to play this, but people talking about the mechanical stuff it did got me extremely interested. Mostly Delivered IMO.
Breath of the Wild
You can approach the nodes of the main quest in the order you choose, and the second one I chose made ninjas start fucking spawning everywhere when I’m just trying to explore, and there’s no way to make it stop. May go back to it one day.
Podcasts
Relentless Picnic Patreon feed
The treats really helped me start distinguishing individual personalities, compared to the regular eps.
Picnic Discord!
<3
FatT Counterweight
Fun, but also I think Mechs are not my shit.
FatT Spring in Hieron/ end of that particular world
8 months since I’ve last tuned into FatT. ah well.
Law School
He’s in everythiiiing!
You Must Remember This: Manson family
*There’s* the context
Misc.
Kindle train guy
Times Square sleeping guy + kids taking selfies w/ him
toddler singing along after Psycho killer (a, ya, ya ya, ya)
drunk and dragged to a drag show
Central park football family
Soft Steel Drum Subway Busker
Weird old lady going to grand central for oysters
2018 in review (cards):
MySelf (CC)
Self: Tower
Blocked: 10 Cups
Ethereal/subconscious: 8 Swords
Material: 3 Swords
Past: Justice
Future: Page Wands
Attitude: Sun
External: King Swords
Hopes/Fears: 5 Coins
Trajectory: High Priestess
Also Self:
Hierophant
7 Cups
7 Coins
Blind Spot:
(self & others): 5 cups    ||    (others not self): High Priestess
(self not others): Moon   ||    (nobody): 3 Cups
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mccoys-killer-queen · 4 years ago
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@axelandriab​ thank you so much for tagging me in this bc seeing brand new questions I’ve never answered before is like a breath of fresh air
Do you prefer writing in black or blue pen? black
Would you prefer to live in the country or the city? I think about this often and I always used to say city but I’m feeling more country now
If you could learn a new skill, what would it be? guitar... please... if not that then I’d like to speak German fluently...
Do you drink tea/ coffee with sugar? nope (unless you count honey as sugar for tea, then yes)
What was you favourite book as a child? I honestly don’t remember reading books/having books read to me but it was probably Goodnight Moon by Margaret Wise Brown
Do you prefer baths or showers? I haven’t taken a bath in a good 6 years so I forget what it feels like (I don’t fit in my bathtub anymore... I’m too long) so I gotta say showers by default
If you could be a mythical creature, which one would you be? either some sort of fairy, nymph, or shapeshifter 
Paper or electronic books? Paper
What is your favourite item of clothing? my denim jacket with all my patches on it
Do you like your name? nope :3) I think Rachel is a very boring, generic, uncreative White Girl name and if I ever get famous (which ain’t gonna happen) I’d totally go by a pen/stage name
Who is a mentor to you? pssh just any of my Rock and Roll Dads (i.e. Joe Elliott, Brian May, Kevin Cronin, Nikki Sixx, etc), I feel like They guide me somehow
Would you like to be famous? famous for something good? Yes. I’m such an extrovert like 60% of the time and I love oversharing and sometimes feel like I’d be good at handling fame. Plus honestly I don’t feel like I’ll be able to survive long in life unless I somehow get famous bc let’s face it I’m never gonna have a “real career” or be satisfied with any job or be able to make a living by constantly working (but then again I don’t have any talent that can make me famous either oops)
Are you a restless sleeper? yeah more often than never :3)
Do you consider yourself a romantic person? aesthetically romantic, sometimes, but I identify as aro. Romance irl just feels wrong, like it doesn’t mix well with me, like when you put a certain metal in water and it explodes
Which element best represents you? Earth? Either earth or water
Who do you want to be closer to? “My favourite musicians ;(” <<stealing this too :c just all the Leppard bois pls
Do you miss someone at the moment? Nope
Tell us about an early childhood memory? I had a computer class in kindergarten, and I remember on the very first day of it, the teacher taught us what a floppy disc was when introducing us to all the parts of a computer. This was in 2006, and I still have yet to use one.
What is the strangest thing you’ve ever eaten? Probably chicken and waffle pringles, but dipped in chili (GOOD)
What are you most thankful for? the money I have in the bank (even tho I try not to touch it), my driver’s license, not having a job right now, my therapist, my music, my hamster, being surrounded by green
Have you ever met anyone famous? Yes, Rick Ray of Sunshine Allen :3 that’s it :’3
Do you keep a diary or journal? Nope, even tho my therapist told me that journaling my thoughts is a big help, I kinda don’t wanna go back to doing that
Do you prefer to use pen or pencil? Pen bc it flows easier
What is your star sign? Pisces
Do you like your cereal crunchy or soggy? Crunchy all the way, soggy cereal is a HUGE pet peeve of mine
What would you want your legacy to be? someone who was very interesting and did a lot of things
Do you like reading? What was the last book you read? honestly, reading is overrated. Even if the book is good, reading isn’t as hyped up as everyone on this site thinks it is. I do like reading sometimes, but I barely do. I read a lot in high school bc I had so much free time on my hands in class, but outside of school I can’t do it. The last book I read was a reread of The Princess Bride by William Goldman
How do you show someone you love them? *Lisa Simpson staring at plate* ??? Error 405??
Do you like ice in your drinks? yeah but not a lot. Maybe just one or two cubes to keep it cold but not to dilute it a lot
What are you afraid of? being stuck where I am forever, never escaping my family, never finding my path in life, whatever the hell is wrong with my mentality getting worse and impacting my life in a huge way, any health related problems, I could go on :3)
What is your favourite scent? Old Spice
Do you address older people by their name or surname? ...what exactly is this question asking? Depends on how casual I am with them/how well I know them
If money was not a factor, how would your life be different? I would NOT be living here that’s for damn sure :3) I would’ve been to so many different places by now and maybe I’d actually have a real life and actually BE an interesting person
Do you prefer swimming in pools or the ocean? pools, bc the ocean is too salty and choppy and doesn’t smell as good as chlorine imo
What would you do if you found $50 on the ground? “I’d pick it up, and if I saw the person who dropped it, I’d give it back to them” << true but then if i couldn’t find them then I’d probably go buy some records with it and put the change aside into my Concert Fund
What is one thing you’d want to teach your children? honestly I don’t think I’m ever gonna have kids, but I’d want them to understand that gender roles don’t exist, and neither do the opinions of society
If you had to get a tattoo right now, what and where would it be? ...I’m actually getting a tattoo next week... it’s going to be on the side of my right shoulder, a silhouette of a pine tree with an outline of a crescent moon above it
What can you hear now? The sound of the fridge runnin in the room behind me, my mom getting something out of a drawer
Where do you feel the safest? in my bedroom
What is one thing you want to overcome/conquer? whatever’s fucked up in my head like anxiety and trauma, etc
If you could travel back to any era in time, what would it be? if I had to travel back anywhere and stay there for the rest of my life, I’d probably go back 1979 to see the dawn of the 80s and live through them. If I had to go for a day then I’d probably pick the summer of 1988 or something
What is your most used emoji? probably 🤙
Describe yourself using one word? tough
What do you regret most? not going to see Def Leppard and Journey when they were less than an hour away 2 years ago. Yes, I couldn’t drive back then, so there was really no way I could’ve gotten there and back (and I could’ve BARELY gotten a floor ticket to begin with, it would’ve cost like half the money I had to my name), but with the Stadium Tour being delayed ANOTHER year I feel like 2 years ago was the only chance I’ll ever have had to see my favorite band :c so even though it was basically impossible for me to go, and a lot of the factors of that were out of my control, I still feel like I blew it, and wish I tried literally everything I possibly could’ve done (like just buy the ticket and figure out how to get there later, call everyone I could think of to try and hitch a ride). Even if I did so, there was still a VERY, VERY slim chance that I could’ve ended up going by some goddamned MIRACLE okay I’ll shut up now sorry I’m just still very upset even so much time later
Last movie you saw? in theaters? Rocketman last summer. In general? Uhhhhh I really don’t know, I think it was Love, Simon
Last TV show you watched? on tv? Rick and Morty. In general? I was watching The Young Ones on youtube today
Invent a word and it’s meaning? Scress (we actually made this up like 2 years ago)- it’s a game where you play chess on a Scrabble board while also playing Scrabble
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popculturebuffet · 4 years ago
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Jake Reviews Stuff: Bojack Horseman: Horay Todd Episode! (Plus a little bit on girls with slingshots)
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Happy final day of pride month everybody! It’s been a hell of a ride.. and not just because the current landscape of the globe feels like hell right now, And to close it out we’re taking a look at an often overlooked segment of the queer community in media: Asexuality. I first learned about asexuality from the web comic girls with slingshots, because I love comic strips as much as comic books and because mainstream media tens to be really bad about telling people about diffrent facets of the lbtqa+ community, proven by the fact It took me till 2010, 18 years into my existince, to learn trans people existed from the long running candian teen drama Degrassi, birthplace of candian rapper Drake despite his damndest attempts to make people forget that, and a show that actually tackled the subject really well and the horrible shit trans people have to put up with, especially at Adam’s age. I also bring it up to apologize for a lack of trans representation of this pride as I scratched my head trying to think of some.. only to forget “oh yeah that really damn good rocko special from last year exists and has been sitting there all month dumbass” as I was writing this. I’m truly sorry and will try to get a review of static cling out sometime in june as an apology. 
Back to Girls with Slingshots though because like with degrassi I want to give it genuine props and a talk here both for teaching me about it and being really good at queer representation in general. We actually meet the comic’s Ace representivie Erin, a shy 19 or 20 year old, when lead and professional dumbass Hazel hired Erin to find out who was dating her friend Jamie.. turns out
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Given Jamie had only been dating men up to this point, and her one time with a woman lead to her assuming she wasn’t bisexual,  when Jamie TRIED to tell Hazel what was going on Hazel, being kind of a dim, assumed it was an aaron and Erin decided rather than just you know, show up and let the the hamster in hazel’s brain slowly figure it out to do this. 
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Why yes that is a tiny asexual wearing the most transparent graucho marx-ish disguise ever. And why yes Hazel absolutely falls for it and even when Erin outright takes off the disguise it still takes Hazel a good minute to connect the dots. And why yes, this strip is awesome and is worth taking a large amount of time to talk about in an almost entirely unreatled article, more than i’d planned really. But eventually things hit a snag: the two TRIED having sex before Erin left to go to school in london.. and given i’ve out and out admited she’s asexual, you can guess it went badly, with Jamie feeling bad it was so uncomfortable and didn’t talk to her until visting her in london, where the two patched things up: They still loved each other, Erin was simply asexual and Jamie realized she was biromantic.  However this didn’t mean Jamie herself was asexual.. and to Corsetto’s credit she actually fully dealt with this. After Jamie accidently became a meme while complaning about how horny she felt, the two had an honest talk about it, with Erin revealing she was perfectly fine if Jamie hooked up with dudes to satisfy her needs. It was a nice compromise and one of the first times I also learned polyamory wasn’t just something some weird asshole on tv did where he forced three women into what looked like an utterly miserable situation. What i’m saying is polgamy isn’t the same as polyamory and sister wives is objectively terrible and i’ve only seen minutes of it. 
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In fact the current daily reprint is up to this storyline and has Erin wing womaning for her girlfriend. And yes I do acknowledge this won’t be a solution for EVERY couple, everyone is diffrent.. it was really nice to show a relationship between two people of diffrent and wildly underrepresented sexual orentations that , rather get into a depressing thunderstorm over something like this, talk it out like adults and work out a resonalbe solution. Hence why I took several paragraphs of something else entirely to get into it. If you want more , check the strip out here. 
https://www.girlswithslingshots.com
Okay now that plot cul de sac is out of the way, though I don’t regret a minute of it, you see the problem: Girls was the exception not the role and media wise, has a small but loyal fanbase. Big shows just didn’t really get that asexuality existed. But then one decided:let’s go let’s do this... so now i’ve talked about something else entirley for a good few paragraphs let’s talk about Bojack horseman Bojack Horseman is, like SU last time, one of the best shows of the last decade animated or otherwise. And like Steven, and adventure time before steven, it changed the game on what a genre of animation could do. See while Animation was going thorugh another renicssance in the 2010′s, it was mostly on the kids side for the first half.. Adult Animation was...
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While there were good shows,after all Archer is a child of the 2010′s, bob’s burgers premired shortly after, and venture bros was, and still is, goin.. they were the exception. Family Guy was devloving from a really funny show to a horrible, unfunny mess that was and probably still is the television equilvent of screaming racist and offensive things just to piss people off and thus get attention and Adult Swim hit a slump, with several great shows like metalocalypse slowly leaving, and most that was left were garbage like Mr.Pickles. It .. wasn’t a great time. 
But around half way two shows changed things and most adult animation stood up and took notice; Rick and Morty, which while i’m not as much of a fan these days was and still to some small degree is a really funny show while also having a deeply complex and deeply deconstructed lead. And around the same time. we got Bojack.  As you probably know, Bojack was the tale of Bojack Horseman, a former 90′s sitcom star who starred in Horsin Around, basicaly fully house if uncle joey adopted orphans with bits of other tgif shows mixed in. Also he’s a horse and this world has a mixture of humans and various anthropormphic animals. And they dont’ shy away from that either and use that for a LOT of great jokes. Anyways Bojack is now a washed up asshole whose done tons, and as the show goes on continues to do, terribe things to get where he was, and is now trying to hang on to the scraps of his career. Around him are Princess Caroline, a pink cat and his agent and ex-girlfriend who wants a real realtionshpi , a baby and her career to go somewhere, Mr. Peanutbutter, Bojack’s dim aquantince who was on a ripoff show (which only PB seems not to get and is even called “Untitled horsing around ripoff project” at first in a flashback) and is really nice but also really bad at reading people, Diane, PB’s wife for most of the series who soon becomes bojack’s friend when she’s hired to do his autobigoraphy, and today’s subject, Todd, a 20 something cloudcuckoolander who crashed on Bojack’s couch after a party, and just.. never left since Bojack thought todd was kicked out for being gay and brought him in for brownie points (he was just lazy), and then despite insulting Todd constanlty kept him around because he was crushingly lonely and before Diane, had no other friends.  There’s obviously more to it. more evolutions but as the episode title shows, today’s ep is all about Todd, so we’ll be focusing on what he’s been up to: Todd spent most of the first two seasons just kinda.. bouncing around. Whlie the a-plots could be more serious, most todd plots were wacky palette cleansears, from him ending up in jail and trying to court two gangs at once like it was that one episode of family ties every sitcom sense has copied, made a giant copy of his own head over months, or started a safe cab company for women that somehow ended up as stripper cabs. Season 3 however added more weight: Bojack’s various slights against Todd were piling up, and he was starting to get tired of it, the straw that broke the camel’s back coming when Todd’s ex emily, who todd failed to sleep with because he didn’t want to but, not knowing what an asexual even was, couldn’t comincate with it and bojack having a really bad track record of thinking with his dick.. you can kinda see what happened.
Finding out much later, after Bojack used emily telling him not to as an easy way out of telling him and both were kinda stupid with that, and Todd eventually found out something happened.. but when Bojack tells him it was sex, Todd is genuinely suprised and had, for the last time expected better of him. Really Todd is a great deconsturction of the wacky sidekick in shows like this: the often abused optimist oppisite of the pesmist asshole protaganist. But here it shows.. that can only go on  so long. You can only treat a person like dogshit so many times before they grow tired of you and as Todd prepares to move out and bum around somewhere else we get one of the most iconic, and best, scenes in the series as Todd unloads on bojack after the horse tries apologizing.. couched in excuses. 
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“It’s you bojack, it’s alwasy eben you” This scene hit like a truck, not just due to Aaron Paul absolutley killing it, but because as someone with a bad habit, even sometimes falling back into it, of justifying why I did something bad afterwords or blaming other people for far too long, if not NEARLY to the extent bojack did, it resonated. Sure those kinds of things may have LEAD you to the things you do but sometimes, your just doing shitty things and no amount of reason for it makes it okay. And it was a bold step to take: while the two talked on occasion and their friendship KINDA regrew, it never REALLY recovered from this. Things didn’t go back in the bottle. Bojack lost one of his best friends as his friend.. they were in the same orbit but it’d never be the same.  Todd did eventually tell Emiliy what he was dealing with and Emily told him what he was, and Todd started crashing on mr.peanutbutter’s couch because, unsuprisingly, the two eventually became close friends. So with Emily out of the picture, while she liked todd she needded sex and neither of them thought of an open relationship, that’s where we find Todd, grapling with his asexuality while getting into his usual wacky misadventures, which hadn’t and would never stop, as evidenced by the horrifying sex robot he created to try and please emily in a later season. So with all of that FINALLY out of the way. we can finally dig into horay todd episode after the read more. Because while i’m going to try doing that less to get more readers.. this episode is giant just at the introduction and is a half an hour long. 
We open with an orchestra, nervous Todd won’t show up for his solo.. because of course Todd’s a regular part of an orchestra now. He shows up in time to do his bit on the triangle, cheers all around
Att the bar, the various musicians wonder just who Todd is. Was in a prison gang? (Yes two in fact as stated above) A foreign prince?? ( He looked just like one and they swapizesd for an episode), a tech billionare? (For all of five minutes) Or is he both?... there isn’t a both here I don’t know why I did that. However the conductor roars in, he’s a lion, .. and it’s keith david everybody!
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As you can probably wager Keith David is a faviorite of mine, one of the best voice actors around, a fantastic live actor, and just all around awesome dude.. and still pretty damn hot at 64. And while this is a minor role, ANY time keith david shows up is cause for celebration and I honestly forgot he was in this, so it was a nice suprise. 
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We then find out how the two know each other, with the conductor calling Todd “The most giving man he’s ever known.” Accurate. Todd once saved his pregnant daughter from a shipwreck carrying her on his back, delivered said baby on a piece of driftwood then circumcised said baby while hanging from a rescue copter.. and also had a spirited but respectful debate before hand about how circumcion had fallen out of vouge, with them eventually deciding on it since the lions are jewish and she’d like the option for the baby to join the relgion if he so chooses when they grow up. Which is both a great gag and a nice nod to circumcisons not being popular these days, and makes todd even awesome. I mean not every man would not only be repsectful when talking to a mother about this, but do so while hanging from a helicopter. Also props to the old timey paperback illustrations, which doubly sell the sudden debate bit. It’s something I love the show: while it’s one of the most depressing in existance, it’s also god a wonderfully goofy sense of humor that helps ballance things out.  The conductor then explains todd later filled in last year when their triangle player died after getting his foot stuck in his triangle, another good one, but worries about todd and just how MUCH the man gives and wishes sometimes to see him not there when his part comes up, to see Todd give for himself. Then of course Todd spoils the move by coming out drenched in water with greasy hands, having tried to wash taco stains off his shirt, but then got greasy hands from said taco he ewa sstill holding and being trapped in a bathroom for an hour. That’s Todd in a nutshell: He can be legendary, selfless and utterly helpful or insightful one minute, and somehow get trapped in a hallway for an entire episode the next. That.. actually happened in case you either didn’t know or entirely forgot. Cue Credits.. a FIRST for this show suprisingly. Given most shows i’ve done are 11 minutes the credits usually happen before the show and I just forget to talk about them. I”ll breifly say the credits for Bojack are exellent and I love how they evolved and changed as each season wore on, and give the team kudos for doing what most shows just simply won’t or can’t do in western animation.
We’re at the peanutbutter residence, where PB is in the middle of his political campagin, working with his controlling and assholish ex wife katrina, and Todd gives him some pocket cheese to help but get’s shoed off and works on breakfast in the background with a giant egg for some reason. Probably because all animals are sentient here. And yes they explained how they still got meat. Anyways, Diane is annoyed that Katrina wants PB to decide if he’s for or against fracking based on public approval, insstead of you know just.. being against it because it’s wrong. She’s STILL better about it than that one episode of last man of earth I watched where the straw man liberal asshole argued with the consertaive asshole lead over a pothole they had and refused to just let his son belivie god exists because it calmed him down and in the next one forcibly dressed said son up as coal to mock his future mother in law because he’s as bad as the lead character, because this show is miserable and Ryan is what the writers apparently think a liberal is.  Anyways as this goes on we see Todd.. pulling his weight. He packs diane a lunch, leaves it by her purse as she gets ready to go to work, makes said giant egg into an omlette for pb and sets up a nice breakfast complete wtih his medication hidden inside because dog. We see that despite crashing there Todd has grown from where he was and is now making sure to actively contribute to the house as thanks for letting him stay. Anyways PB needs his glasses to take them off to seem sincer because he left htem at princess carolyn’s, she also represents Peanut Butter, Todd and Diane. Todd heads off, though dosen’t sign for a package as he once ended up with cremated remains, or cremains as he calls them and I now will, over it because of course he did and heads off while a mysterious horse in a trench coat watches... more on her in a bit.
At Carolyn’s agency , PC annoynces “it’s todd” with todd giving back an excited it’s me... he should enter the room like that every time. It really fits. Anyways, it turns out PC needed him for help with actress Courtney Pourtnory, whose in femalecentric Taken spinoff ms.taken, which i’m shocked wasn’t an actual movie. There’s also a lot of tounge twisting puns which as always Amy Sedaris flawlessly delivers and that i’ll miss now the show is gone. Anyways Courtney isn’t seen as relatable so PC goes with the oldest trick in the book: have some normal guy date the celebrity to see them as relatbale and well todd’s on retainer. Todd is reluctant, less so due to his  asexuality and more because he’s not only already busy with the sunglass errand, but has a meeting tonight. intresting. But PC ensures todd it’s no trouble and they can just do lunch for the paparazzi and todd does like the idea of having his picture taken. “It’s proof I exist.” It’s the same reason I hate having mine taken. It’s proof I still exist and this hell year hasn’t ended yet. 
Back at the campagin unsuprisingly what todd didn’t sign for was important and Katrina just tells him to sign for Pb next time, which is like giving a dog a play bone that also has a dart full of poison that shoots out of it into the rest of the living room. There’s no way this ends well and you should know that. So Katrina asks him to dance a little sidestep on the issue instead. 
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This movie is eh but this musical number is awesome and I will use it at any opportunity. Rest in peace Charles Durning. It helps it’s still relevant as hell for both sides of the isle. Anyways Todd signs a letter to the state goverment because again, telling todd to do something without even remotely thinking about it is like giving a baby a boomerang loaded with nitro glcyerne, but soon gets cloroformed by our mysterious viewer. “And down goes todd. “.. said by todd himself because of course he did> God bless this man and aaron paul’s performance.  “And up comes todd!” .. whose, not suprisingly, apparently been drugged and/or knocked out enough to have a catchphrase for these situations. After grabbing a pool skimmer for defense because you know a stranger just kidnapped him, the stranger calms him down and introduces himself: And this is where we properly meet Hollyhock..  Manheim-Mannheim-Guerrero-Robinson-Zilberschlag-Hsung-Fonzerelli-McQuack which I copied directly from the wiki because this review is already running long and running behind, and I don’t want to spend an hour trying to copy that from the episode itself. The nightmare of a name, which is a running gag is because she was adopted.. by 8 gay men in a polyamours relationship. And one of them is apparently related to launchpad. 
Anyways Hollyhock, who called at the end of last season to no answer, thinks Bojack might be her dad and thus bought a spy kit to figure out. And used the cholorform, if apologizing for it because once you’ve got it you can’t not use it. Todd is unsuprised by both things; As bojack hilariously but horrifyingly put it his penis was like sun dried tomatoes in the 90′s: it was on everything, and Bojack himself had that kit, mostly using it on himself because of course he did. She tracked down Todd because Todd was in Bojack’s book as his roomate. Todd explains they no longer live together and Bojack has been missing, long story there though we do know where he was due to the last episode, but since Hollyhock really dosen’t need to meet him just wants his dna to find out if he’s related or not, so Todd suggest sher house. Time for more cloroform!
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At Bojack’s place Todd wonders where to find a hair, since most ladies Bojack is with understandably shower afterwords only for Holly to find one.. and a sleeping unconcious clearly spiraling once again Bojack. Todd lament siwth an oh bojack: just because he’s mostly done with the guy dosen’t mean he still dosen’t care. Todd’s still a good guy and still dosen’t want to see his former friend go through this for the 80th time... he’s just done being the one to be there for him through it and that’s understandably.  Hollyhock yanks a hair which does nothing to wake him, unsuprisingly, but the mention of “blowing this place” makes Bojack wakes up as he thinks people has blow. it’s also telling that he’s worried Todd’s going to yell at him again and that he’s clearly stills marting from his understandable telling off. Todd is force dto make up an excuse since Hollyhock VERY understandably dosen’t want to tell him the truth, and Todd lightly rebuff’s bojack’s attempts to be pals again.. given he hasn’t really changed, it’s understandable. Also Hollyhock cloroforms him to get out of BOjack asking more questions and sends todd to take the dna to a place. Todd heads to  a 1 hour dna testing lab, because of course there’s one this is LA. But without Hollyhock’s dna they can’t do it but the guy says to come back with it in an hour after he’s done with lunch.. which gets Todd to realize OH SHIT I HAVES A DATE and he runs off. The fact he DIDN’T actually say that is a suprise. 
At the date Courtney transparently breaks up with Todd for publicity as Todd is utterly confused, before getting reminded about hollyhock. This scene just kind of happened so have the first gif I find typing “David Byrne” into gif search. 
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Back at Bojack’s house all Hollyhock’s done is snoop around, finding Bojack’s box of bad reviews of other people’s sitcoms because of COURSE he has that, eat a full box of donuts and take a nap.. given the simliiarity todd isn’t sure they need that test. Hollyhock naturally refuses and just wants to use todd’s hair but since the dna guy said that don’t work, they find some in her comb. Todd however has to cover for the earlier Maid excuse he gave bojack, nice bit of foreshadowing there, and cleans up the house while Hollyhock sits around. I know she’s not his daughter, still related but still and even I’m having a hard time beliving the truth.  No sooner than does Todd put out that fire, than things get worse; Naturally the signutre was for pro fracking and while Katrina is pissed, not fairly as again, it’s like she handed a baby a shot gun for tots that make sa funny noise when you pull the trigger and is suprised that he shot up the couch. Anyways PB is understandabily more worried his wife will be upset he has to support fracking now, and Todd untietionally offers to distract her from the media while Hollyhock takes a nap because she feels.. really diffrent early on. While parts of her horseman traits would remain here she’s far less friendly or helpful than she would be later on in this half of the episode. it’s not BAD as sometimes it takes an episode or two for a character to properly become what their like for the rest of the series, it’s just WEIRD. Like Red Green’s monotone in early Red Green Show episodes it just feels.. off. 
Todd rushes off to Girl Croosh, the click baity blog diane works for because I forget when things happened sometimes, where Todd is doing the most todd distraction possible: Telling diane to look at him while he dances. Which to Diane’s shock has been going on for 45 minutes. 
Diane’s boss Stefani comes in voiced by the wonderful Kimiko Glenn who I admited to loving as a voice actress, and having a crush on back in my first close enough review and still stand by. She’s wonderful. Stefani berates diane for not being clickbaity enough, other plot for this season etc etc next todd crisis.  Princess Carolyn is annoyed they didn’t get a picture of courtney with todd.. even though she left first but this eems to be the “blame todd for things that are either not his fault or you should’ve expected by talking to him for five minutes” episode. Anyways PC says to be at the shark jacob’s fashion show in 30 minutes, and Diane bemoans trying to get people to pay attention to the world sucking. Todd shows some more competence and actually gives her a good metaphor: When mr.peanutbutter dosen’t want to take his pill, as I expected, Todd disgusied it.. though in the cheese. Just do that: put some hot goss around the rest of it. Todd, to keep her away from the computer with a literal headline that reads “Mr.Peanutbutter supports fracking and hasn’t told his wife yet”, because this show is amazing, makes up a story about Channing Tatum having an illgitamte daughter and gives her the testing hairs. The theme of this scene, and the episode really is that people underestimate todd: understandably the man got lost in a bathroom at the top of this episode and refused to sign a package because of past shenangians... but because of that they fail to see that todd is .. actually really compitent, insightful and caring. IN this one scene he actually suceeds in his mission in the dumbest, toddest way possible, then on the fly kills two errands with one stone while also giving Diane genuinely good advice. But the big question the episode poses is.. what does TODD want at the end of the day and just how much of this “doing everyones shit for htem” should he take?   
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As Todd passes a sheep with a wonderful “The end of the wool is coming’ sign, he sneaks into the fashion show.. we also see a background model bird smoking that I SWEAR is a protytpe for tuca, just with a diffrent bodytype and a more aloof, supermodely face. Though if this is the same universe it could just be a sister of hers. It’s not out of the realm of posiblity. And yes I will defintely be talking Tuca and Bertie at some point, especially once it comes back next year. Being todd he ends up walking the runway instead, and it goes poorly, but Todd telling them that fashion shouldn’t be elitest somehow works and he become a hit. Also Tim Gunn is there as himself, beacause this show liked to mix animal versions of celebrites iwth the real ones, and sometimes had the real ones voice the animal versions of themsselves. Todd also gets a call from Diane: it’s a match. ALso I forgot Todd’s wonderful ringtone which is him , to the opening of that one betooven song going “todd todd todd TODD!” Magical Back at the horseman residence, Bojack’s sent hollyhock to go thank channing tatum for collecting his mail and goes through all the mail that piled up while he was MIA. He’s also wallowing about his miss opprtotunites, some involving pottery barn. He’s suprised by PB’s governor run, with Todd countering that of course he knew he’s been around and when Bojack asks how Diane feels Todd shoots that down right away and insists he just ask her himself, and again counters; Does she even know he’s back? Bojack insists he’s no tready, and he’s only told Todd he’s back.. and his various drug guys, channing tatum, and hollyhock. But not his inner circle. And given he and PB tend to not mesh well, though it is getting better at this point, he ruined things with Todd, he dropped PC for entirely warranted reasons.. Diane really IS the only person he has to call and he’s likely afraid of disapointing her. He then tells Todd to friend break up with channing tatum, with todd thinking his speech was about him and being understandably disapointed. I also like Todd’s attiude here: he’s done just.. taking Bojack’s shit and isn’t going to stick around for it and only really agrees to go to channing tatums because Hollyhock’s over there and he needs to tell her. 
Todd goes over and lies to hollyhock after warning her BOjack might not be readyf or a daughter and Hollyhock expresses her own doubts. Then diane shows up and Todd’s force dto play being channing tatum so they both don’t get arrested for trespassing. Diane confronts channig with her thoughts he’s the father, which hollyhock instnatly realizes exactly what that means, but relents on doing so, not wanting to be that kind of journalest and ruin someone’s life for her own benefit. Todd gives her a pep talk and she accepts it’s him because it’s what she thinks channig tatum would say and leaves with a cheery “love half your movies. Hollyhock meanwhile has fled, obviously upset and before Todd can deal with THAT, he gets another call, clearly tired at this point as am I as i’m not only not used to reviewing 22 minute shows anymore, let alone 30 minute ones, but I have a ticking clock due to my own procastination. She once again gets mad at him, this time a bit more understandably, and Todd darts off to meet courtney. 
The two talk, and Courntey is dressed like todd only her hat is 50 dollars.. and that’s a hella don’t... I miss Macklemoore. Anyway, Courtney opens up about being seen by everyone but not being seen at the same time.. which todd relates to even if courtney can’t fathom someone having the same feelings, but admits it’s nice to talk about it while Todd laments about his meeting, worrying h’es not ready yet. That what if it goes badly? What if the idea of something is better than the truth. I realate both due to my anxiety proving that and because as a comics nerd and general nerd, that’s happened more times than I can count, both with legendary stories that turned out to not be very good or something I really looked forward to turning out to be a mess, like It Chapter 2, or Zoolander 2, or Secret Empire or.. point is Courtney does relate to that and prefers fiction and the paparazzi, the same ones who tailed bojack for multiple episodes in season 1, eat it up with Courtney announcing their engagment iwth todd responding with “Horay i’m confused!”... that’s me all day everyday buddy. 
Todd goes back to Bojack’s to find Hollyhock, and being a good friend even to someone who certainly dosen’t deserve it at this point, tells Bojack the truth.. which he reflexvley denies before Todd admits she didn’t want to tell him and Bojack. understands and once again piles pity on himself. 
We then get the scene that got me to review this in the first place.. thanks asshole! All jokes aside, the two have an honest conversation: Bojack, while not outright saying sorry admits all he does is hurt people and he slept with the one person he ever saw todd be in love with... given it’s hard for him to give out a genuine apology, it’s still a good moment as it shows Bojack, even if he screws up constantly, is really apologetic about destroying their freindship. That part also shows WHY it was wrong: Sure todd couldn’t and wouldn’t sleep with her.. but it dosen’t change the fact Bojack SHOULDN’T have , knew what he was doing, did it anyway and then never told him. 
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He continues with it though after todd wonders if he’s evne allowed to love. , saying he got more of Todd than he deserved, and all the guy asked for was a roof over his head and the ocasional smore in a baquet, and tells todd he didn’t deserve him and he really appricated him. This.. actually gets Todd to open up and he comes out as Asexual to bojack which after making it clear it means he’s not a sexual deviant, dynamo or what have you, a great wordplay gag, that he’s just not sexual.. Bojack.. shockingly and to Todd’s suprise dosen’t think it’s weird like he expected, but is thrilled and honeslty wishes sometimes he was asexual and we get what I consider to be the best joke of the seris.  Bojack; Maybe then I wouldn’t have A strain of herpes Todd; You have multiple strains Bojack: I know, it only works with the A.  Todd feels.. good.. while i’m not Ace myself I am bisexual and both times i’ve come out, first to my mom and a few friends, then to the rest of the world this month on facebook, it felt.. freeing. To not have to worry or hide no more.. to just be who you are.. and it feels.. good to Todd. While Bojack tries to slide back into friendship since todd isn’t mad about Emily anymore, Todd gently stops him: It wasn’t just here, as I made clear earlier, he’s not ready to be his friend again.. but hes ready to be more than NOT friends. While their freindship won’t be the same anymore, as Todd makes painfully clear.. Todd gives him a genuine i’t’s good to see you as he leaves. Again he may not LIKE the guy anymore and understandably dosen’t want to be the only person he can count on in bojack’s life... he still wants the guy to be okay, which the fans could probably relate to the whole damn series; Being fed up with his bullshit and TERRIBLE TERRIBLE actions, but wanting him to be better already. The door rings.. and it’s HOllyhock. We MIGHT get to that another time, but for now we close out Pride, and todd’s tale as todd goes to his meeting... which as it turns out...
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While there is still more miles on Todd’s journey, ending his sham engagement set up here, a failed relationship and a sucessful relationship at the end of the series, not to mention reconcliation with his family... Todd takes an important step and takes what he wants, finding his people and being proud of who he is.. and that’s sometimes the best and hardest step. And we get a nice button on the framing device as Todd misses his solo for the first time, to the conductors delight. The End. 
Final Thoughts: This was a really good rewatch.  While not AS heavy as some other bojack episodes, it still has plenty of good character work, moving along or setting up several plots for the season without any of it feeling forced whlie giving Todd added depth in his coming out story. Todd still dosen’t fully understand what his asexuaity is and is scared to be open with it.. but that beautiful scene above is what makes the episode work as is the ending right after: By finally telling someone he knows, and by being accepted by the last person he’d expect to not only understand what Todd is but embrace it.. he can finally find others like him to help him through it and finally find something for himself after giving so much to everyone else while asking nothing in return.  That’s also a nice bit of deconsturction here... while Todd’s happy to help we do ssee bouncing from storyline to storyline actually wears on him and that sometimes it’s tiring being the guy everyone assumes has nothing but time for htem. It’s a nice development and Aaron Paul does it beauitfully and I do stand by HIS casting, as unlike with Allison brie where they knew diane would be an vitamese woman and cast a white woman anyway, though to Ralph-Paul’s credit, he’s throughly apologized for this and Allison Brie herself recently also apologized for it personally in the wake of the recent black lives matter lead call to not have white actors voice People of Color anymore. Also props to Jenny SLate for, if a bit late , still leaving big mouth for the last two seasons and apologizing herself among with any other actor or actress whose dropped a role as a POC when their white. It’s a good trend. But here.. I get why they didn’t try and get rid of Aaron Paul. It was probably hard enough to get executives to give a shit about Ace representaation enough to let htem do it, adding “firing a big name draw to replace him wiht a likely no name” was probably a bridge too far and sadly, sometimes you have to pick your battles, and they picked getting to have an ace character at all and to Aaron Paul’s credit he’s been an Ace ally ever since. HOpefully in the future we will get more ace chracters and more ace actors and actresses playing the part, but every journey begins with a sigle step and this storyline was a huge one.  But overall the episode is truly fantastic, a highight in a series full of amazing episodes and it was a good note to go out on for this month. I won’t stop doing LBGTQA reviews obviously, and I should’ve added the a way sooner, but it’s been fun doing them and i’ve been proud too. Some have been better than others but the better one shave been some of my best work. So as we live in uncertain and stupid times, stay safe , black live matter and your all beautiful. I have other stuff in the works; a full steven unvierse arc, regular coverage and of course that “sorry I was a moron” static cling review, but until then, I love you all and i’d like, if I may, to close on a song... not by me obviously my singing voice is “sorta adaquate I guess’ at best. 
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