#this was my emotional support fic idea i was writing for while stressed in a long flight 😭

[riacte]

superhero au but it’s about superhero false saving this silly civilian guy ren who keeps on getting kidnapped for some reason (and he has no idea he knows the superhero in real life)

[corvidae-00]

"Kiss me?"

A/n: Halloooo!! this is my first time writing for Joost and i LITERALLY have so many ideas so PLEASE REQUEST FOR HIM?!?!? PLEASEEE Based on this song! give it a listen ;>

~: fem! Reader, Tooth rotting fluff-, maybe slight angst if you squint, mutual pinning, both parties completely oblivious, reader and Joost have been friends long before Eurovision, literally so in love with each other, Maybe a little self-indulging, literally just a music fic but YAY- Word count- 1,095

Joost rubs his fingers against his lips softly using his elbow to somewhat hold up his head, his day dragging on, and the thoughts of going home and smoking a quick cigarette sounding splendid right now. He sighs and sets his hands flat against the cluttered table the sound of music and heavy bass pumping the walls and making things seem far away. His concert was next and all he could do was wait and hope it went smoothly- not that he expected any different he couldn't help but ponder, especially with how empty the backstage room was. he fiddles with his tank top and slowly runs his fingers down to play with his jeans squinting and making a face at all the loose threads from how worn and loved all of his clothes had eventually become.

"Joost?" A voice calls from the door the handle turning slightly and a head poking in- a bundle of hair and smiles were what he was least expecting "Gekke kikker?" He smiles a goofy smile where his lips curl up and the dimples around his cheeks make his smile that much more beautiful. He stands up quickly and strides over letting you slip fully inside and smile just as wide "Surprise!" You laugh opening your arms for a big hug from one of your most long-time friends "What are you doing here?- I thought you were busy?" Joost says pulling you into his chest tightly and muffling his words by dropping his face into your shoulder enjoying your presence, feeling his worries and stresses fade. the hard vibrations of the bass are not so nerve-wracking now. "How could I miss my best friend's performance right before he takes the stage at Eurovision!" You chuckle and rub his back the tanktop lifting and falling with each stroke, Joost can feel the goosebumps creep up his arms at the gentle gesture "Ah, well- I guess that is understandable Mijn lieveling" he sprinkles a little bit of his mother tongue into conversations and while you would love to know what he was saying you were yet to get lessons that the dutchman so intently insisted on giving you. Pulling away Joost can't help but smile again knowing you are here and ready to cheer him on- his biggest supporter through thick and thin- someone he always adored and went to for anything. someone he in a sense of the word- loved. Maybe he truly loved you and maybe a few times he had laid in his bed with a cigarette and had his eyes closed with ideas of him in nice clothes and you in a beautiful dress and watching the stars in a beautiful less populated area where the galaxy could be seen. Just maybe.

This hadn't been the first time you had popped up or shown up to support Yoost- and it wouldn't be the last- being his personal cheerleader through everything- YouTube- the beginning of his music- and even now was a job you took seriously. Knowing Joost you knew In the end it meant something or changed some kind of emotion and the smile that always graced his face was something you were more than happy to bend over backwards to see. After the concert you found yourself walking around the nearly empty streets of Amsterdam laughing and leaning into Joost after a joke he cracked where it may not even have been a joke- the look he gave you just proceeded to lead you to crack up more "what? is that not something to ponder je mafkees??' he shoves you playfully before cracking a few laughs himself "oh no no- your face just makes it all the more fun" you poke at him and shake your head a little as Joost smirks taking two wide steps and wrapping his arms around your waist and lifting you up spinning you a few times "who has the funny face now?" He laughs at the surprise of the sudden assault on gravity "oh that's not fair!" You laugh trying to look back at him. Joost's eyes fall on yours, full of wonder and shine- 'has she thought about me at night like I have her? A future of this being normal-' he thinks to himself a small smile taking over his once loud features as he sets you down and shakes his head putting his hands into his oversized jacket an airy chuckle leaving him. Little did he know that every time he smiles- or laughs- or holds you like you mean the world butterflies erupt and you have to fight everything in you to kiss him, hold his cheeks in your hands, and run your thumbs over the apples of his cheekbones and be ever so gentle with him. something you have kicked your feet in bed about- you sat in front of your mirror wondering if that could ever be you.

Joost looks at you through his glasses the two of you standing a few steps apart both seemingly lost in each other's own thoughts- before Joost sighs and can feel his skin grow hot and he pulls a hand out to rub the back of his neck- "I- you-" he stumbles out and silently curses himself- an almost 30-year-old man can't even grasp his own emotions and You blink and smile a little stepping closer to him "You- Me?" you smile seconding his stutter and he looks over you his eyes landing on your lips that even in the dark only slightly lit up by a street light- seemed too soft to be real. He looks back at your eyes and reaches for your hand which you happily accept in the middle letting him pull you closer to him his other hand pulling out of his coat to wrap around your waist- "Kiss me..?" Joost whispers internally cringing- 'How straight forward- you clutz-' his thoughts are cut off by the feeling of you leaning in and softly pecking him on the lips- Joost leans forward to follow your lips as you go to pull away his eyes already having fluttered closed. You chuckle and lean back in kissing him gently and wrapping your arms around his shoulders leaning into the gentle embrace. Pulling away you and Joost lock eyes, cheeks flustered and smiles adorning each party's faces "Spend the night?" Joost looks to the side bashfully and you can't help but blush and nod "I guess that can be arranged" you tease leading both of you to laugh softly leaning in and resting your foreheads together.

Dutch translator: Gekke kikker? - Crazy frog? Mijn lieveling - my darling je mafkees - you weirdo A/n: THANK YOU FOR READING- this was my first time ever writing Joost- so hopefully the more I write him the better it gets?? BUT PLEASE REQUEST FOR HIM!- I wanna write for him so bad- THANK YOU AGAIN!!! LOVE YOU ALL <3

[cordeliawhohung]

Real Talk.

Hi. I wish I had good news, but I don't. This is going to get very venty and probably triggering, so I apologize in advance, but I don't want to just vanish.

I've made the decision to private pretty much everything on my account here on tumblr, and I am heavily fighting the urge to delete everything off of my AO3. I realize that I'm sort of self destructing, in a way, and I'm trying very hard not to just toss everything into the void lest I come to regret it later, but here we are.

Things in my IRL have not been great, and they haven't been good for a long while. I started up this blog a little over a year ago at the crux of my depression, fighting off extreme suicidal ideation and untreated PTSD. On top of that, I had to support my mother through marrying her abuser and watching her slowly lose herself while I helped assisted in taking care of my kid brother, and helped my other brothers through their battles with addiction. Like everyone else in the world, I've had a lot on my plate. So much so to the point that my anxiety and stress is making me sick.

For the first time in a very long time, I had picked up writing again and found it to be a wonderful outlet to really get my feelings out in a safe way. It was so freeing being able to be in control of everything, and explore the very real and scary emotions that people have otherwise wanted me to snuff out. I wish I could snuff it out. I have had no choice but to feel everything I wish I could run away from, but at least this way I was the one dictating everything. Even through the pain and the last few months of pure disassociation, this was mine.

Now, I hate it. I hate it all. I can hardly stand looking at these stories or anything I write.

I am not going to share names; and please do not go looking for this person or harass them as I'd quite frankly rather kill myself than have another glimimp situation and would probably just actually delete all my works; but something that really kicked this up was someone plagiarizing one of my works. While not exactly copy and pasted, I could compare pretty much every line they wrote to my own work. I do not mind people taking inspiration from my works, but the fact someone took it upon themselves to essentially create a "fix-it-fic" of my work was honestly the last straw for me, I think. And to just regurgitate half of what I had written like some high schooler summarizing a story?

"Kore, did you try talking to them?" The idea of confrontation actually makes me want to throw up and considering the actual issues I have going on in my real life, I don't see how it's worth getting up in arms over fanfiction. Believe it or not, I'm not really good with words, and I end up making a fool of myself and coming off way different than I intend to half the time (blame the autism I guess). And I know for a fact that it won't change the fact that I still hate it. My works. Everything I write. I want it gone. I want to purge it.

I hate The Prowl and TMTIV. I can't see myself writing for them anymore. I've tried. I had to force out the last chapter of The Prowl only to just not even be able to edit it. (Yeah when that anon sent me that ask about The Prowl? "When are you updating it next?" I literally had the rough draft finished when they sent that and was trying to edit it, and now I don't even want to look at it anymore).

And this sucks because I really do enjoy sharing my stories with you guys, but it's just not fun anymore. And if it's not fun, then why do I keep doing it? And I feel bad, especially to my patreon supporters because I definitely didn't deserve the support when I started that up, and I certainly don't deserve it anymore, but I really need to step away. For a good, long while.

I don't like dealing in certainties, which is why I'm privating everything on here rather than deleting my blog, because maybe one day I'll come back and continue. But right now it's really not healthy for me. This place has grown to become so toxic. I think I'll start focusing on original works instead. Ones I may or may not post to Patreon just... depending, I guess. Writing is still so lovely and I don't want to lose it, but I certainly can't keep it here for now.

I want to apologize to my followers, and my mutals. I cherish every kind message you all have sent to me. I appreciate how considerate you all are, and I'm sorry I don't have the energy to respond half the time. I've deleted tumblr off of my phone, so to the mutuals who want to keep in contact with me, feel free to ask for my discord or something. I'll try to get on to check tumblr every now and then for that.

In the end, I really hope this is just me having some stupid mental breakdown, and that this isn't a forever goodbye, but we'll see.

I'll hopefully be back someday (: if not, I'm sorry and I still love you.

[eldrith]

oh babe dont get me wrong, i thoroughly enjoyed the fic (everything you write is an automatic favorite) and it was so, so heartwrenchingly beautiful but omg i'm in pain lmao.

also going back to the last ask you answered of mine (before the sad fic one. lol)!! absolutely he is the #1 wifehusband. dare i say #1 malewife. but this part!! "he’d want to talk to his wife for days on end, and also could (and does) talk about her for so so long to anyone who was around. #1 wifehusband i stand by this" skdufhaskf YESSSSSSSS. i can just imagine him keeping his wife up later than usual (and not for the reasons she truly desires. jace is a dumb Loser for not noticing.) yapping her ear off, especially if it's been a busy busy day as the crown prince.!! or rhaenyra having to cut jace off in a council meeting bc he's droning on and on about his wife, and while she thinks it's cute and endearing, they have actual business to attend to.. "and wearing pieces of jewelry that belongs to each other omg." girl i just went weak in the knees ugh akshfaksj didn't know i needed that in my life but now i do. or jace having jewelry crafted from pieces of old swords/equipment of his for his wife to have something of his with her always, or his wife giving him a tiny pocket square of embroidery to tuck into his pocket that has become so worn from the amount of time he spends rubbing his thumb over it (especially during longgggggg meetings). he lowkey gives fidgeter vibes so i can just see it becoming a soothing mechanism for him !! "so cute and like can u imagine how rhaenyra would just be so happy to see how happy jace is (& how incredible of a man hes become… hes so devoted to his sweet wife)" i'm getting teary eyed with an idea of rhaenyra thinking about how proud harwin would be of jace and what a great man he's become. anyway don't let me expand further on that bc i will Cry (and talk your ear off for 12 hours)!!!!!!! also rhaenyra would be the best mother in law??? ever??? so so supportive and sweet and loves how much you love and adore her son. anyway. Anyway. also in my head luke lives and spends 90% of the day teasing jace over how whipped he is for his wife :// little brother things i fear. and jace has zero shame bc he's #1 wife guy and knows luke will be the exact same way one day soon.

one day i will expand on jace as a father but. i fear i've talked enough today pookie. love u. - hubby jace anon <33

aw stop ur too nice omg :') im glad u enjoyed it <3

but omg yes 10000% to all of this.

jace literally bounding into his wife's quarters, basically oblivious to the looks she's sending him as he just rambles and talks, so excited to be with her. and asking her about her day, sighing gently when she starts to kiss up and down his neck nevermind i can't go there

also in the earlier stages of marriage or when the war is quite stressful and theyre at council and jace out of nowhere just snaps to defend his wife's honor, calling someone out who slightly disrespected her and the chamber goes silent... <3<3 love <3<3

i also loveee the idea of having a piece of him on her at all times <3 and like... jace gets one of her rings and puts it on a necklace and wears it under his clothes. he fidgets with it when he's reading or strategizing, just as he does with the pocketsquare (you have to give him a new one bc the first one is so frayed) alSO he takes your hair ribbons and uses them as bookmarks. yeah

& ur so right rhaenyra would be emotional and see so much of harwin in jace and shes just so proud. also yes she'd be the best mother in law i see her inviting you to dine with her and just thoroughly enjoying your presence, gossiping and just loving spending time with you & seeing you interact with her son. she would love you like a daughter - she always wanted one.

also stop can you imagine luke... oh my goddd. hed be thrilled to make fun of jace and i feel like he'd become so fond of calling jace ur dog lmao.

things like being in a hall with luke when jace enters, speaking with some lord - you wait for him patiently to end his conversation but luke has no mind for that and immediately teases jace. calling out to him, "here boy!" mocking and whistling like one would summon a dog, "your lady needs you!"

or or or (you've awoken a beast in me this is your fault) like

him walking past and catching jace adjusting the clasp on your necklace or something, maybe helping you with your slippers and he cant help but just go "i swear you’ve got him trained better than the hounds." you roll your eyes at luke, shooing him away with a grin as he mutters "he’d probably sit and beg if you asked him to.”

but jace would just grin so proudly, laughing and shaking his head as he stepped back to admire his handiwork - then sending you a look when luke is gone lmao.

& luke and jace sitting at a feast watching you dance with others and luke just gives him a look, "wipe that grin off your face, you look like you've gone mad. i think you're salivating" and jace is just like "she's so beautiful." & luke rolls his eyes, gagging, “gods help me if i ever get like that.”

but jace knows his brother, and he smirks, "oh, you’ll be there someday, luke.” luke rolls his eyes and huffs, "strike me dead first." and with no hesitation jace just mutters "i'll be sure to. if not before."

yeah i have so many thoughts about that... luke would become jace's wife's annoying little brother but also her bff

also PLEASE father jace bring it on omg. he'd be the cutest father i actually am going to pass out

[sundrop-writes]

why did you delete careful?

i went to go re read and its gone 🔫🔫

Just to clarify for everyone - yes, I did delete it from Tumblr. My series Careful (Spencer Reid x Fem!Reader) - has been completely scrubbed from Tumblr, aside from reblogs by other people that I cannot delete.

Why did I delete it? Honestly, the tone of your message really drives home why I deleted it - entitlement from readers, a general unkindness toward me and this work that I have put hundreds of hours into. People being rude in the comments and blatantly misunderstanding the work because of a fanon acceptance of babying Spencer to the point of emotional incompetence and absolutely smooth flawlessness. (So having me prod at his flaws in the fic makes me worthy of such harassment.)

I really wanted to drive home the fact that you are not entitled to fanfiction. Fanfiction is a privilege.

I deleted it because I wanted to make a point: fanfiction is free, and you cannot treat it with the same harsh, unhinged criticism that you would with a piece of media that you paid for. (Especially because fanfiction authors are directly reading your comments, while TV producers/writers and movie producers/writers are not.) If you do not like something in a fanfic that you're reading, click away and forget about it - don't comment on it.

And I really hope that me deleting this fic and people 'missing' it will cause people to take a step back and self examine so that they are kinder and more thoughtful the next time that they comment on a fic.

Writers use their free time to work hard on fics, and there is a huge amount of stress that goes into getting an idea down on paper, making it coherent, editing it - even something like making fanfic covers to embellish our fics to make them more enticing to read. There is a lot of hard work and stress that goes into a fic before it's even seen by anyone, so I don't need the added stress of rude comments, entitled people, and the passive-aggressive 'this is good, but-' comments that people constantly bring to the table.

I really, really loved Careful when it was in my drafts. I was so excited to post it for everyone to see - but after posting it, the comments I received made me resent the fic so much, made me question my entire creative process as a writer, and made me really bitter toward the fictional characters I was writing about, but when I went into the fic, I had nothing but genuine enthusiasm about them.

Making someone develop a deep, vile resentment (bordering on hatred) toward their own fic is really something else. And it made me realize that people don't deserve to read that fic in order to comment on it.

It will not be reposted to Tumblr, but it is still on AO3 - and that is very purposeful on my end, because all my fics are archive locked, so fewer people can see them and read them. I was considering deleting it off every website altogether, but AO3 is an archive for a reason. I may orphan it on AO3 later -or I just hope that I can write enough works that I am proud of and that I love in order to bury it deep in my catalogue so that I don't have to look at it or think about it anymore.

If you really want to read it, go find it there. If you don't have an AO3 account - then idk what to tell you.

Just be kinder and more thoughtful when commenting on fics. And please, learn to support writers in other ways - actually reblog their work instead of just lingering with a blank blog, go back and read older fics on their masterlist, engage with them.

And if you already do these things, this message is obviously not for you. If me saying this pisses you off, then this is probably for you.

[gaypastabake]

sad Edge head-cannony rambles

hey um uhhhh [Spoilers for the entirety of Sparks of Hope] and also TW: mentions of trauma ok thanks

Ok so im not really sure how to format this post, I just really wanted to talk about an important head-cannon of mine for Edge and I had so many ideas relating to it but no motivation to do any of them, like I started a short comic but don't want to finish it, so im just going to go on a weird ramble because that's all I know how to do.

Ive had a head-cannon for a while that Edge doesn't respond well to any sort of physical contact, like if somebody were to put a hand on her shoulder in a friendly manner she would interpret it as an attack and would punch them. Given that when she was created by Cursa she never had any kind of support group or friends she could really trust, its likely she's never been hugged before either, and even if she has been hugged during her spark-hunting days those people are long dead to her.

Edge has difficulties showing any kind of emotion given the circumstances of her creation, she was made to hunt sparks and nothing else. She was discouraged from feeling strong emotions as it could be a distraction from her task, and likely isn't used to showing her feelings. Not only that but the only people she had ever trusted turned their backs on her because she cared about the sparks, and was likely mocked and ridiculed for that sentiment.

In my personal head-cannon that's why Edge is so reserved and isolated from the rest of the Mario + Rabbids crew, because shes scared of putting herself in a situation where she appears emotionally vulnerable because of the incident with the spark hunters. In every cut-scene when everyone is on the WM-ARC she's always as far away from everyone else as possible, because she doesn't like getting close to people due to her own insecurities. She appears angry or indifferent all the time because she either doesn't know how to process or actively refuses to acknowledge her own thoughts and feelings, and is resorting to acting headstrong and annoyed

Something I wanted to write about in the Mario Rabbids fic I was planning is the possibility of Edge coming to terms with her emotional ineptitude and fears of getting close to people both emotionally and physically. I feel like in an instance where if she were in a relationship (platonic or romantic) with someone it would take her a while to get used to affection, she would get irrationally uncomfortable and stressed with physical contact and would likely try to ask for boundaries until she feels more comfortable putting herself in a vulnerable position. There's a scene ive planned in the fic where Edge finally feels comfortable and asks to cuddle, leading to her finally breaking down because she's never been used to real and genuine affection from another being.

guhhhhhhh there are allot of thoughts I have about her and if I think of any more head-cannons I will certainly talk about them without revealing too much of the plot for my fic.

I included the drawing because I felt this post would feel empty without it, especially since I tend to word vomit when talking about things I like. sorry if some of my thoughts are not coherent im not good at wording things.

[reds-writings]

Hey!!! I wanted to start this out by saying that your writings for Rust has been nothing short of amazing ! There aren't enough fics out there for Rust, and yours have honestly been getting me through it.

Now, idk if this is the type of ask you were looking for, but with Old Man Rust, especially when he was in Alaska all that time- I've always wondered the details about his time out there (besides the obvious/what we already know). I mean- it's Rust we're talking about, and that poor tortured man...it couldn't have been great.

I know he spent most of his childhood up there alone with his father and such, but this time around? After everything happened? I've always assumed his self-isolation was probably at the highest it'd ever been, especially with how he talked about it.

Idk- I've always wanted to know his thoughts/feelings about so many different scenes/things within the show, but this is definitely one of the biggest ones. Even if you relate it to the jj universe- I think adding a partner adds layers to my curiosity on his experience/thoughts/feelings. I know when you answered that fluff prompt ask, them being away from each other for all that time was talked about; he still loves her very much, and is incredibly troubled about all of it.

Anyways! I feel like I've gotten a bit carried away, so I'll stop before I keep going 💀. You definitely don't need to feel obligated to respond or spend time on this, but know that your contribution to the true detective community on here is greatly appreciated 🥺.

Howdy! I love this ask!! The more detailed the more fun! And thank you so much for the love ahhh!!

(this will include some spoilers ahead for the JJ universe pls don't kill me lol)

I love the dissection of Rust's reasoning for returning to Alaska, of all places, after the big fight of 02. My fave idea being that he did it as a form of self-punishment for taking part in hurting his only companions in Louisiana. Applying these events to the JJ universe: the incident with Maggie will still be taking place sadly. But hear me out!!!!

In 02 with the resurgence of the Yellow King/Carcosa Rust easily found himself obsessively spiraling back into the Dora Lange case. With all the frustration and lack of support from the department (and Marty), he resorts back to nastier habits and ways of regarding those around him with JJ!Reader unfortunately being in the crossfire more often than not. It places a heavy strain on the relationship to the point where she reaches a breaking point bc tbh he is not being a very good partner at all (stress and frustration can only be an excuse for so long). They break up with her telling him to practically get it together if he wants them to ever continue but of course, shit just spirals more out of control with his hurt and anger so of course it reaches its crescendo with him having to quit then Maggie using their incredible emotional vulnerability to an advantage which he ends up regretting immediately of course because even if he's not currently with JJ!Reader it's no less of a pathetic form of betrayal.

When the fight goes down and he loses Marty it's one thing. Seeing the reader and the tie between them being severed completely with no one else but himself to blame is just about as close to dying as he'll get in that moment. He shit on her trust once and for all and took a friend from her in the process. He knows that there can be no forgiveness even if he were to beg with whatever last bit of reverence he had or sell his sorry soul.

Alaska is a bitterly lonely time for him and from tidbits he mentions in the show he didn't do much to change that loneliness while he was away. Circling back to before I think it was his way of extreme penance and if it weren't for another resurgence in the case he would've probably let himself die there alone with all the drinking/carelessness and wouldn't have had it in him to feel sorry about it if it happened.

Coming back to Louisiana things have changed plenty with Marty, Maggie, and the reader. I think the way he prioritizes his crumbled relationship with Marty (for both the case's sake and his) versus how he passively regards Maggie in the bar will forever be interesting to me. I feel like he'd be scared as hell to even come near the reader knowing she still harbors hatred and pain but Marty the Meddler drags her back in because he knows the two will never be able to truly stay away from each other. It takes a lot and the relationship may never be exactly what it once was but he'd selfishly rather have her near in some capacity than never at all once he's gotten a taste of her presence after so many years. I can't wait to write all that angst and yearning bc we love tension 🤭

Now that was a ramble omg! Hopefully, I didn't stray too off course!

[cal-daisies-and-briars]

Hi Cal!!! Parenthesis comments anon here - i’m so sorry about your computer crash on my last ask thats so frustrating :( but as always i’m super grateful for everything you write!

Also I just read Madney cinderella and it was so adorable!!! Well done!!

I’m gonna break this up into a few asks to ward off the computer crashing demons :p i thought about just requesting less but that only lasted for about three seconds until I realized that I couldn’t pick any fics to leave off the list so this is my new solution :p

⚡️⚡️⚡️⚡️⚡️⚡️⚡️⚡️⚡️⚡️⚡️⚡️⚡️⚡️⚡️⚡️⚡️⚡️⚡️⚡️(oh boy a last minute wedding disaster! I love it! Can’t wait to see them all come together to make it happen)

🚨🚨🚨🚨🚨🚨🚨🚨🚨🚨🚨🚨(oooooh they be publicly dating! Good for them!)

🩸🩸🩸🩸🩸🩸🩸🩸🩸🩸🩸🩸🩸🩸🩸🩸🩸🩸🩸🩸🩸🩸🩸🩸🩸🩸🩸🩸🩸🩸🩸🩸(THE END OF THAT LAST CHAPTER WITH THAT LETTER OMG!!!!!!!! I always say this but it’s so true - this story has completely captivated me and I’m so excited to see what’s next!)

HI! That's a long way to refer to you, so it's PCA for now. Hi, PCA! (if you would like a better nickname, lemme know)

Thank you once again for all of these! Breaking it up like this actually does work super well for me. I like this solution!

60 for ⚡️ (thank you!!! I am excited to get them there!)

---

Mysterious, Eddie thinks. Whatever. As long as it gets the ball moving and takes away some of Buck’s stress, Eddie does not care. 

🗲🗲🗲

Buck can’t sleep.

Not that that’s particularly surprising, given the circumstances. Several hours of emergency wedding planning have fried his brain. He’s completely exhausted. He thinks he has stress-related heartburn. But here he is, laying in bed well past midnight. Awake. Listening to Eddie’s steady breathing and wishing he was equally as unconscious.

It’s not even because things haven’t improved. They have. The restaurant called a few hours ago, apologetic and scrambling to make things right. They informed them that while the dining room and front of house are in a bad way and likely need several weeks of repairs, the kitchens are in working condition. If Buck and Eddie find a reasonably located venue, they can still cater with the original menu. This is, of course, a huge relief. As much as Buck loves Bobby’s cooking, he hated the idea of Bobby having to throw that all together last minute. Especially on a day when Buck was hoping to monopolize him for emotional support. 

He had planned on shedding lots of happy tears. Not hysterical, stressed out tears. But something, something best laid plans, right? 

Buck flops around a little in bed, trying to reposition himself in a way that will be comfy enough to bring on sleep. It’s all in vain. He knows it’s not going to help. He’s half fallen asleep in several different comfortable positions by now, only to wake with a jolt every time he’s on the verge, thinking of their pressing deadline. Sort of like a dream when you’re falling, except waking only brings more dread, rather than relief. 

Eventually, Buck’s tossing and turning rouses Eddie. He turns over to face Buck with a heavy sigh. 

“Buck,” he mumbles, laying a hand on Buck’s chest. “You need to sleep or you’ll feel worse.”

“Thank you,” Buck grumbles, irritated. “I hadn’t tried sleeping.”

Another sigh.

“Buck. Come on. I’m sorry I jinxed us.”

Buck scoffs. “Eddie, I know you don’t believe you jinxed us.”

“No,” Eddie admits. “I don’t. But I am sorry I said something with crap timing that made you feel like I jinxed us.”

Buck’s not sure that’s an actual apology. He gives a little huff. 

Eddie sits up in bed. 

“Alright, enough of this.” He says decidedly. 

“Enough of what?” Buck complains. “Being reasonably stressed our wedding is ruined?”

“Enough of that,” Eddie emphasizes. “Our wedding isn’t jinxed or ruined or cursed or whatever insanity you and Chim would concoct to explain a very unfortunate fire.”

Buck gapes at him. He is not sure how the hell to respond to that. How is their wedding not ruined? Jinx or not, there’s still no venue!

“My love.” Eddie’s tone shifts. Buck’s body goes a bit gooey, despite his tense stress. They don’t often refer to each other in terms of endearment. 

---

36 for 🚨 (YEAH!):

---

Chris blushes a little, like the idea of approaching Buck with this is embarrassing. He’s nine going on thirteen, apparently. 

“Maybe I will.”

Eddie smiles at him. “Okay. You think about it.”

“I will,” Chris assures him.

“You know,” Eddie says. “He misses you just as bad as you miss him.”

“You think?” Chris asks.

“Oh, I know. A hundred percent.”

Chris smiles a tiny, pleased smile. 

“He’ll be home soon,” he recites, the way Eddie has told him a hundred times. 

“That’s right,” Eddie agrees. “He’ll be home soon.”

ii.

Buck gets home from Texas before sunrise. 

He is bone-tired and in desperate need of a full night’s sleep. Which he likely won’t get for several more hours. Sleeping seated in a fire engine overnight? Not impossible. Not the worst Buck has done. But not great. The cot situation in Texas was reminiscent of the military. Needless to say, Buck misses his mattress. 

When he gets home, he tries to be as quiet as possible. He unlaces his boots and creeps through the house, trying not to make a sound that would wake Chris. According to Eddie, he’s been missing Buck pretty badly. If he hears that he’s home, they might not get him back to sleep. 

He cracks the bedroom door open and slips inside. Eddie is in his bed. Buck feels a little thrill at the thought that even with Buck gone for several nights, Eddie didn’t go back to his own room. Most of his stuff is pretty much already there because of quarantine, so Buck supposes it makes sense. But somehow, this makes it seem even more real. Buck can’t keep the grin off his face as he sets down his duffle bag. 

---

96 for 🩸 (I AM GLAD THAT HAD YOU HOOKED!!!)

MAJOR SPOILERS AHEAD

---

 Someone’s about to pull a mask off. Buck just isn’t sure which one of them is the monster. 

Kim unlocks her car with her keyfob and walks right to the driver’s side door. She doesn’t notice the tires. Walks right by them. Buck feels a flare of frustration. He popped the driver’s side tires for a reason. The car is literally resting lopsided. Just Buck’s luck. He had to choose to murder someone who is the type of person to drive two miles on a flat before realizing. 

Kim climbs into the Prius and starts the ignition. The tail lights flicker to life in Buck’s view. He can hear a radio turn on, volume loud from when he left it this morning. She’s listening to some old classic rock type thing. Buck tries to shove this preference aside. The less he knows about her likes and dislikes, the better. It can’t matter. 

The Prius backs up three feet, makes a struggled noise against the pavement, and comes to an abrupt halt. So she did notice. Thank fuck. 

The car switches gears to park and Kim steps out, purse in hand. She pulls her phone from the designer leather bag, and uses its flashlight to inspect the tires. 

“What the fuck?” He hears her curse. 

She crouches down for a closer look. 

This is it. Buck’s moment. Now or never. 

Hunting knife gripped in his hand, Buck begins his quick descent. He moves like a shadow, approaching her. 

He thinks about what he has to do on loops in his head. One quick movement. Clean and quiet. Her throat. So she can’t scream. Can’t draw attention to them. 

Horrible. Vile. Evil. 

For Eddie.

All for Eddie.`

Buck stops behind Kim. He moves his arm, ready to strike, but for a second - just a single fucking second - he hesitates. He notices his hand shaking. He feels like he’s going to puke. He hates this. He doesn’t want to do this. He hates himself for being willing to do it at all. 

He swallows down his humanity. He strikes. 

Unfortunately, his moment of hesitation has cost him severely. 

Kim whips around with cat-like speed and plunges something sharp into his abdomen. His body screams in a blistering moment of pain, then recoils with numb shock. The thickness of his jacket absorbs a fair amount of the puncture, but Kim is strong. He feels a sharp edge stabbing through the soft side of his belly. 

Her eyes are cold and furious, making bold contact with his. She pulls her weapon from him, causing another spike of hot pain. It’s a nail file. She stabbed him with a fucking nail file. 

Buck staggers back a little. He clutches his stomach with the hand not occupied by the knife. 

“I warned him,” Kim practically growls. Her teeth are extended and full in her mouth. “I warned him I wouldn’t be nice if any of you showed up again.”

What? What is she talking about? She saw Eddie? Talked to him? 

“Were you nice before?” Buck seethes. “When you fucking murdered him?” 

She wrinkles her nose. “You have no idea what it’s like.”

“I guess not,” Buck grumbles. He takes his bloodied hand off his wound and slowly reaches for the gun in his pocket. “But I really don’t care right now.”

Buck may have lost his element of control here, but he’s not giving up so easily. He came here for a reason and he doesn’t give up. 

He pulls the gun. 

Kim throws herself forward, using the momentum of her body to elbow into his wound, knocking him off center. She’s tiny, but she’s endowed with strength that’s beyond a non-vampire. Buck manages to stick his knife between her shoulder and collarbone before being knocked over entirely.

He hits the ground hard, and feels a foot step down onto his wrist. The wrist holding the gun. He loses control of his grip and drops the weapon. 

Fuck. 

This is going really poorly. 

“Meeting Eddie was the worst thing that ever happened to me, I swear to god,” she snaps, pulling the knife from her shoulder. Like someone with no paramedic training at all. Blood seeps from the wound. Idiot. 

Buck twists and grabs her ankle - opposite of the one stepping on him - pressing fingers hard into her Achilles’ tendon. She stumbles as he wrenches her foot to the side. She takes her other foot off his wrist and he’s able to scramble for the gun. 

As he does, she drives his own knife down into the back of his shoulder blade. He shouts in pain. It hurts a thousand times worse than the wound to his stomach.

[dimepdf]

★  𝐈 𝐓𝐇𝐈𝐍𝐊 𝐘𝐎𝐔'𝐑𝐄 𝐇𝐎𝐋𝐃𝐈𝐍𝐆 𝐓𝐇𝐄 𝐇𝐄𝐀𝐑𝐓 𝐎𝐅 𝐌𝐈𝐍𝐄. + 𝐉𝐎𝐄𝐋 𝐌𝐈𝐋𝐋𝐄𝐑

masterlist. / taglist. / any request? synopsis. Joel couldn't help it, he was infatuated with the way you looked, and he would think about you so vividly that it would keep him up to the point of tossing and turning in his bed at night.

─── ☆ notes. I have been stuck in a bit of a funk for awhile, which kind of stinks because a lot of my writing really doesn't reflect how I’ve been feeling lately. I hope this brainrot parts ways with me very soon, but in meantime here is a totally down bad ventfic. | — feedback is always welcomed & don't forget to reblog 🤍

─── ☆ length. 2.9k (24 min read)

─── ☆ genre and warnings. +18 nsfw under the cut. minors dni | angsty | vent fic | dilf Joel | pre-apocalypse | black coded fem reader | mentions of mental illness | mentions of sexual partners | longing and yearning | realizing feelings | commitment issues | insecurities | legal age gap | older man/younger woman | very self indulgent | Tommy being the best wingman | kinda obsessive | masterbating(m) | touch deprived | intimacy starved | praise be desperate and needy men | not beta'd real men have typos | title inspired by this song trending on my tiktok fyp .

Because he had grown up as a single parent, Joel liked to think he had been built with a natural bullshit detector built in. 

Having been thrown into the lifestyle of unexpected parenthood by raising the little mischievous girl that was his daughter Sarah for 12 years of his life, he learned the highs and lows that came with raising a child with little to no moral compass.

He had to learn that it was best to go through life being stressed about absolutely everything while also being prepared for everything; that was just his life motto.

It came from the years of hiding the very real emotions he had hidden under his true exterior, from the love of his life leaving him with a baby to somehow floating through his 20s. 

Keeping his screws tight and pushing through without taking any handouts from the people that would peer at him with pity in their eyes.

Joel was the type of man to never talk about his troubles to bottle up all his emotions, nor had he ever talked about anything that bothered him outwardly. 

Not even to his little brother Tommy, who had certainly made it his mission to lift Joel out of the funk he had always seemed to find himself in. 

Joel knew that his lifestyle wasn't that hard, he felt blessed to even have the amount of support and family that he did have left. Sure, he had to live from check to check, but that was the same for most underpaid workers who lived to achieve the American dream.

So, like most, he just sucked it up and did his best to keep his mouth shut and to go about his day as drama-free as he possibly could.

Joel didn't think that he was living a miserable life. He felt it was better to be constantly on edge, knowing the trouble Sarah would get into every time he turned his back to the girl.

In fact, he had many things troubling him in his life, silently adding more and more to his plate as the days unfolded beneath him.

The newest addition was about how he was just on the brink of losing the second job that Tommy had helped him get too, and that just added to how he was supposed to keep a roof over Sarah’s head if he wasn't able to get paid enough to keep food in the fridge.

the last thing Joel wanted for Sarah was for her to feel forced to pick up some slack around the house, knowing her idea of help was using her bad sticky fingers habit. 

Remembering how just last spring, when he had let it slip that they might have to cut back on leaving the lights on. 

Joel had a rude awakening the next morning to a lengthy lecture over the phone from Sarah's principal about how the little girl had gotten caught scavenging through her classmate's backpacks. 

Learning that his daughter was busy pawning anything that she could get her hands on after school wasn't something Joel expected to hear.

So as much as he wished he could give up at times, Joel had made it his mission to raise Sarah so she would not feel like she had to lift even a finger, teaching her that with a bit of hard work, even bigger awards would come.

Though the completely different side of his life, Joel would be busy swatting Tommy away like the pestering little brother that he made himself out to be. 

"You just need to get back in the game.” Tommy would insist boldly on wild the suggestion, claiming how Joel wouldn't be so high-strung if he had an actual lady friend to keep him company the nights he had found so difficult to keep his bed warm. 

It took a lot of convincing after some years for Joel to finally just bite the bullet, agreeing to go on a few double date nights with Tommy's guidance. 

The younger sibling was personally assigned as his overly charismatic wingman, making it his task to saddle whichever poor woman he laid his eyes on across the bar to squeeze next to them for the night. 

Many women have met the unfortunate fate, most coming up with an excuse to part ways after they failed to crack Joel from his awkward shell. 

It was a constant cycle of nothingness, and the older man returned home at night alone just in time to tuck Sarah into bed. Date after date, Joel had just about given up on seeking out "the one", just in time for the universe to throw him another thing to add onto his plate: new annoying neighbors. 

You weren't even allowed to introduce yourself before your dog had made himself at home and snuck into Joel's backyard through the hole in the gate he keeps putting off fixing. 

Your little pooch kicking up dirt all over his patio and chewing up all the toys Sarah had left outside that he could get his little paws on, the little girl scared at the sight of her prized dolls all chewed up in pieces, screaming as if she had witnessed a murder happen right in front of her own eyes.

The last thing he had wanted to have to do right after getting off work was chewing out some insolent dog owner for not being to keep a watchful eye on their pet. 

Just as he was about to beat down your dog and give you an earful, he halted once your front door had swung open and had been welcomed by the sight of you.

Stumbling a bit over his words, you had managed to piece together the issues, seeing Joel had your dog by its collar and Sarah's look of absolute heartbreak holding pieces of her toys still in hand.

An apology was the first thing you introduced yourself to your new neighbor as your dog was returned. 

You explained how you just turned and made the mistake of thinking that the gate that separated your two homes would be enough to keep the puppy out of trouble. You were even kind enough to replace some of the toys Sarah had lost as a nice peace offering.

the two of you even getting closer, giving Sarah something to do over the long weekends, the little girl would slip out of the house to go next door to come to pester you to hang out for the day.

Joel hadn't complained much seeing Sarah become so close to you, though when it came to talking to you himself, his stiff personality would always get in the way of forming a proper conversation with you.

Just being around you made him so suddenly nervous, wanting to have at least some type of friendship with the woman that his daughter found such a delight to be around without turning into some stumbling and bumbling fool. 

The situation had only seemed to become even more embarrassing the moment that Tommy had been added to the equation.

It was as if Tommy could read every little expression and problem that was happening in Joel's mind like it was some type of sibling telepathy spilling everything that was clouding his older brother's mind. 

It only took one look at how Joel looked at you to finish the entire puzzle piece, and before you knew it, Tommy was setting Joel up to fix the leak in your sink.

Being the best wingman he could be, Tommy took Sarah out on one of their rare movie nights with a wink and a wave to Joel, leaving just the two of you alone for the moment in hopes of something unfolding without any intrusion.

Unfortunately, the rest of the evening alone wasn't as smooth sailing as he had thought it to be, with Joel thinking he was practically torturing you by wriggling into your life in a manner somewhat like an annoying tapeworm.

Joel liked to think of himself as a bit of a gentleman, giving you as much respect as he could while you two were alone in your home. Though he would never admit it, since his last relationship ended, he has grown to have an awkward relationship with any female that isn't his daughter.

His overbearing awakeness comes between holding an actual conversation with you and still learning how to utter the words "no thank you!" as if he were some nervous child.  

Like how he couldn’t tell Sarah no every time she would ask to stay up just a few more minutes before her bedtime (those minutes usually leading up to hours) or how every time one of his old flings would come knocking on his front door just magically appearing mostly likely from Tommy's influence on his doorstep holding up some food dish he knew was filled with something vile enough to sit untouched in his fridge for the following week until he would secretly passing it to your dog.

There was another issue that had Joel dodging your eyes—a sudden wave of shame always seemed to follow at just the mere thought of bringing a woman home, knowing there would always be the possibility of you peering through your front curtains and seeing him kissing up against someone else at his doorstep.

Let alone having to explain to both you and Sarah the type of relationship that he had with said woman, it was more than enough anxiety to make him back out of hooking up as a whole.

Joel just couldn't do relationships. 

And heaven knows it wasn’t anyone else's fault but his own. It all just makes Joel feel like such a shit person for constantly comparing all the women he has met to everything you do.

Feeling like he was leading all the poor women on, knowing that his heart was completely somewhere else and that no amount of people that he would talk to or hook up with would amount to the emotions and feelings he had for you. 

He just couldn't do it. 

Not with any of them at least.

Joel was convinced he was a bad person from the moment Tommy and Sarah had left, and he could not stop imagining the very adult things that you both could have been doing instead of fixing your plumbing.

There was just something about your presence that seemed to be so alluring, so intoxicating, to the point where Joel just had to get to work quickly, wanting to fix your sink as fast as he possibly could just to have something to do with his fidgeting, nervous hands.

Squatting down with a grunt to get a better look at the pipes, you had filled the silence with your own sense of conversation, full of that new adult stress that had you bouncing off the walls worrying about finding an ear within Joel, who would on occasion speak up with his own blunt sense of advice.

You were so similar to him, and Joel just loved that about you, and it was scary how he had found someone as troubled as he was.

Not only that, but you were also freaking pretty. It was strange because he had never felt the way he did in such a long time.

You were pretty in the weird way that would make him so nervous to be in the same room as you, how he would stumble his sentences, and how your conversations would always fall awkwardly silent. 

Not knowing how to talk to you because he would be too busy trying not to stare or say the wrong thing.

Joel couldn't help it, he was just infatuated with the way you looked, from your glistening brown skin that always looked so soft to the touch to the curls and coils in your hair that looked like it would feel like small little clouds or sugary spun cotton candy in between his fingertips, he wanted so badly to just reach out and touch it—to touch you even.

It was all so wrong, the way he would think about you so vividly that it would keep him up to the point of tossing and turning in his bed at night. 

Joel had let your one-sided conversation die down in the air, assuming that your attention had been pulled to something more interesting than watching him work. The last thing he had expected was for you to have noticed him struggling with the stray longer hairs that poked his face.

Making your way over to his side of the cabinets, he hadn't even noticed you leaning down next to him until he flinched at the tap of your fingers against his, trying to grab back his attention.

The position in which you had stood beside him was a heart-hammering sight. He was peering up at you with his mouth slightly gaping.

Joel swore that the way that the kitchen light had glewed through your curls made you seem like some kind of angel trying to bless the sinful thoughts he was having.

The moment wasn't short-lived, watching your hands hesitate before reaching to use one of the scrunchies you had around your wrist to pull his hair away from his face into a small ponytail.

After that exchange, Joel swore that the rest of the day just seemed to continue on with his body moving on autopilot all the way until he was back home resting in his bed.

Just the mere memory of the moment playing over and over in his mind on a loop, laying in his bed with an untouched erection as if he was some sort of pulsing like he was an out of control teenage boy that just discovered what jerking off felt like. 

Joel was convinced that his dick was just sort of broken until now. Sure, he would get the occasional morning wood. 

Nothing could compare to the feeling of pure arousal that had clouded his mind and left him feeling brick hard, and the worst part was that it was all your fault.

He couldn't believe that he had gotten so spun up about you, thinking about how your fingers had combed through his hair, how those same hands would feel if you just tangled them in his locks and tugged just a bit harder. 

His thoughts trailed farther on their own, how your full lips would feel pressed against his own, how they would look all glossed up and wrapped about his dick. 

How your voice would sound whimpering out his name under him, having you laid spread out naked in his bed within his own four walls. 

It was all your fault for how you had smitten him so easily, with his mind being so fogged that he could barely think about anything but you as he touched himself. 

How you had dared to be so much prettier than any of the other women he would meet on Tommy's double dates—which was such a fucked up thing to compare you to—you just had such a personality that made Joel feel so flustered to the point where he ached to have you in his embrace.

to have you close enough that all his senses were taken up by you—how badly he wanted to be held by you, to be smothered in your arms, to bury his face against your chest and melt into an embrace until he smelled like you. 

Joel felt like he had to be sick, he had to have fallen ill over the course of meeting you. 

It was the only reasonable explanation he could come up with about how just the mere thought of you would make him so hot and heavy. 

It was almost agonizing how distracting you were to him at night, the wandering thoughts of you leaving his cock aching against his thigh. 

Joel wouldn't even realize he was palming himself through his sweats, recalling how you had practically ruined the entirety of his trajectory. He was already tugging down his joggers, and his hand was crawling under his waistband.

The selfish and completely deprived thoughts would flood his mind at the moment he wrapped his hand around his length.

His hand jerked at his hilt as the other combed through the knotting hair at the base of his scalp, trying to ground himself from the tension that started to knot in his stomach.

The selfish act of pleasure would continue on with no end, all he could think about was how good you were making him feel without even being in the same room as him.

How badly he wanted to press trails of kisses up and down your body, leaving dark little greedy marks against your plush skin. 

Joel imagined seeing all of you, all your naked curves and folds, how your plump thighs would look pressed against your chest, how big his hand would look pressing against your stomach pudge. 

He was a fucking mess. 

His fantasies of you playing out in his mind had him biting his knuckles to keep quiet as he couldn't remember if he had locked his bedroom door or not, and the last thing he needed was Sarah rushing in and killing the mood. 

The thin walls don't keep him from unloading all over his hands and pants, bent up strings finally being released with a strained groan parting from his lips as his muscles twitch and his mind finally gets released from the horny rotting intrusion for just a moment he’s floating on a cloud of bliss. 

God, how he hated the heart thumping feeling that followed, the minute everything would come back and click into place realizing what he had done and the troubled feelings he had for you.

Joel was convinced he was never going to be able to wrench his heart from your hands anytime soon.

🔖 @adison-smart27

comment below or tap here to be added to taglist.

[heiayen]

qingxins and wrong decisions - furina & gn!reader

summary: while walking around the liyue, you spotted qingxins- the beautiful, white flowers that you heard about plenty and completely adored. you decided to pick them up, unaware of all the things that will happen...

tags: can be read both as romantic and platonic, depending on how you choose to read this! you&furina gather qingxins, chaos ensues. [name] is a reporter and has no common sense to not pack themselves into troubles sometimes, comedy&fluff, drabble! no dialogues written. part 1 (watching gaming's perfomance) part 2 (playing with kites) part 4 (visitng the hulao mountain and bringing food as an offering)

notes: hehehehe. they are so silly. this is my third entry for @/astronetwrk new lunar year event <3 this was so fun to write n i really should write more... less serious more comedic fics because they are just fun. yeah! enjoy!

In hindsights, it was… maybe a terrible idea. A bad one at least. 

When you decided with Furina to walk around Liyue, enjoy the pretty views, mountains and waters, the wildlife, it was a good idea. A great one, you would dare to say, because Liyue was a beautiful nation. So different from Fontaine, the hills and mountains were breathtaking, you loved it there, and so did Furina. 

The problem started when you saw the lovely, white flowers you heard about so much– qinxings.because suddenly, you wished to gather an entire bouquet full of them. 

And so, the hunt began.

It was fun at first. Furina got the role of a bodyguard and your emotional support, because not only she simply wasn’t the right peson to climb so much, her shoes weren’t either. 

(You weren’t the best person for climbing either, but since you promised her a bouquet, you would give her bouquet and it was final.)

The flowers that grew closer to the ground were funny to gather. You did some climbing on the rocks, picked up the flower, wondered how on earth a flower could grow from a rock– and proudly posed for Furina, that was holding your kamera.

“This is the first qingxin picked up by me, [name]!” You laughed, and so did Furina, clapping her hands in a celebration of your victory, and even taking a picture to immortalize such achievement.

And that was the first flower. The easiest one, not yet warning you of your impending doom.

It continued for a moment– you picking up the flowers, Furina taking pictures of both you and other views, and it was fun. The qingxins in that area didn’t grow very high, so soon you had a small bouquet in your hands. 

For few flowers, you had to skip over a waterfall which… was stressful but you took a deep breath, handed the bouquet to Furina (in case you fell into the water) and went to get that lone qingxin.

Which, of course, you succeeded, and got another picture to the collection. Good thing you packed another film or two…

However, later…

Maybe it was a bad idea to visit this dark, gloomy forest… to gather more flowers. It would be fun, you thought to yourself. You heard a lot of Wuwang Hill and that did pique your interest. Furina disagreed, not wanting to get spooked by some ghosts and, oh, besides! She came here to gather flowers and enjoy the views, not get chased down by some ghosts!

You two went there anyway but made it as brief as possible– and no ghosts tried to scare you, for your luck… which, honestly, you preferred over having to climb even bigger mountains in order to pick up qingxins.

Furina told you that you didn’t had to. You were too stubborn to listen and besides, tiny Furina waiting for you down the hills was… a really funny view. A cute one, too, because she was just tiny, standing there with your camera and now waving, and yelling for you to come down to her. 

You nodded. Looked down, blinked even. 

…how does one climbs down? 

Climbing down that particular place took you twice the time to took to climb up and it included Furina’s worried yelling, your own yelling back (because otherwise, you wouldn’t be able to hear each other from such distance), and some prayers to the geo archon for some good luck climbing down.

…though, wasn’t the geo archon dead or so you heard? For a good second you pondered whether it was a good idea to pray to the archon that was, well, technically dead, before you heard Furina usher you down. You will worry about the technicalities when you’re not about to fall and break a leg. 

You didn’t luckily. You survived this terrible experience and could literally see Furina’s shoulders drop down in relief– and right after it, she started scolding you to not climb hills you couldn’t climb down. You promised to not do that…

…only to try and pick up a lone qingxin, guarded by some hilichurls and mitachurls. 

For the love of gods, you didn’t know if it was your instinct as a reporter to put yourself in possibly dangerous situations for some good photos or gossips to write about– and in this situation for flowers, flowers! but you did it either way, much to Furina’s disappointment and more worry.

(At this point, she would start to grow grey hair because of you. Well. Whatever you could say.)

The hilichurls chased you both out and you did end up tripping and scrapping your knee, twisting your ankle and probably giving Furina a small heart attack with all this, but…

You got your flowers. That was all that mattered.

(Later, you went to Bubu Pharmacy for some salve for all your small injuries and scratches that you got while flower picking and when you heard that you could simply buy the said flowers here, your jaw dropped and Furina let out a quiet “oh!”  in surprise.

To think you could have your pretty, little bouquet without all of this…)

[the-tmnt-ficfinder]

Ficfinder finds: Found Father

Rottmnt Oneshot Summary: It’s Father’s Day, and Raph is feeling more than a bit sorry for himself. His mood is drastically lifted when his brothers surprise him with their own special little celebration.

Found Father: Appraisal and Ratings

(Don't know what fanfic "Appraisal and Ratings" means? Check out my explanation on my Main Masterpost! Looking for a different fanfic to read? Head on over to my Fanfic List Masterpost!)

Disclaimer: This fanfic is a oneshot, and is completed. This fanfic is written by @sketchiefoxie, who writes fun and interesting fics!! Go ahead, go show them some love and support!!

The fanfic ratings are not based on quality, favoritism, or how good I think it is, but rather, how intense a subject may be. Like a movie review, or the tags on Ao3, letting the readers know what to expect.

Plot: 🖤🖤🖤🖤🖤

"Plot is zero out of five!! This fic has little to no plot, and instead focuses on comfort, and fluff. It' a Father's Day themed oneshot, focusing on Raph. Quite a soothing read if I do say so myself!!"

Suspense/Mystery: 🖤🖤🖤🖤🖤

"Suspense/Mystery zero out of five!! No suspense nor mystery to make you stressed or worried!! Their is a hint of mystery later on in the oneshot, though its not the stressful kind. More like light and positive curiosity."

Angst/Hurt: 💛🖤🖤🖤🖤

"Angst/Hurt is one out of five!! No angst, with minimal hurt. The fic does imply child neglect, which I ties into how the fanfic is Father's Day themed. Though, the small amount of hurt makes the fluff and comfort that much more effective!!"

Fluff/Comfort: 💛💛💛💛💛

"Fluff/Comfort is five out of five!! The comfort levels in this oneshot are off the charts! Literally I kept going 'awww!!' like every other sentence with how precious the boys act towards each other!!"

Emotions Conveyed: 💛🖤🖤🖤🖤

"Emotions Conveyed is one out of five!! Found Father isn't the type of oneshot to screw with your head, mostly leaving just good feelings and good vibes behind. I kept smiling the whole time I read it!!"

Drama/Tension Level: 🖤🖤🖤🖤🖤

"Drama/Tension Level is zero out of five!! No drama, no tension, just calm and happy vibes!! Not a stressful read at all!!"

Triggers: 🖤🖤🖤🖤🖤

"Triggers for this chapter are zero out of five!! Practically zero triggers in this fic!! Just comfort!! The only thing that may count as triggering, would be the mention of child neglect."

Legibility (Reading): 💛💛🖤🖤🖤

"Legibility (Reading) is two out of five!! Found Father is a fun fanfic to read, smooth on the eyes, and easy to follow."

Legibility (Audio): 💛💛💛💛🖤

"Legibility (Audio) gets a four out of five!! Would highly recommend listening to this fanfic!! Its like it was written to be listened to lol, seriously though, definitely enjoyable to listen to in audio book form."

Length: 💛💛🖤🖤🖤

"Length is two out of five!! The listening length of this fic is about 11-12 minutes. This fic is a short and sweet read, especially with it being a oneshot."

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Personal thoughts on chapter below cut (Contains Spoilers)

Ok, this fic was just plain adorable, I'll just say it outright.

Today was a day that kinda hurt. It hurt differently than Mother’s Day did. He knew he had little reason to complain, which was why he kept silent, but it hurt all the same.

I had never thought about this before. While Mother's Day would hurt as the boys never had a mom, I can see how Father's Day would hurt worse. The boy's have never had a mom, so they don't know what they're missing. Sure they miss the idea of a mom, but they don't know what its like to actually have a mom. However, they do have a dad, yet their dad isn't always the most attentive. This almost makes it worse. Rather than wishing for a fatherly figure, they wish for what could have been with their fatherly figure. They know what its like to have a dad, and they know what it's like to have him care, missing that caring version of their dad when he doesn't fulfill that role.

Raph felt ungrateful. He knew now that he was older, that their living situation had been unusual, and that dad had been incredibly depressed. But… Sometimes, just sometimes… Raph wished for a father who could have been there.

As shown right here, Raph wishes for what could have been. Not something different, as he does love Splinter, but what could have been.

Raph paused upon hearing Leo’s smooth voice. He was using his ‘I want something, so I’m gonna act nice voice’ and that made Raph a little suspicious. Also, who was ‘we’? Was Donnie awake as well?

Lol I love that Leo has a voice he uses specifically when he wants something. This also implies that Leo isn't always the nicest lol.

Donnie sang in a lighthearted tone “You’ll see!~” and his steps gained a funny little lilt to them, a happy stim. He was excited, and honestly it made Raph smile.

This is freaking adorable. Donnie's happy little stims never fail to make me smile!! Plus, I don't often see people highlighting Donnie's positive or happy stims, so this felt like a nice change of pace.

Raph asked teasingly, “Wha, like this?” And covered one eye. Donnie scrunched his nose. “He said ‘eyes’ Raph. That implies both.” Raph chuckled lightly, “Ah, don’ worry, Raph got it.”

I feel like this implies that Raph only has one functioning eye. Perhaps a post apocalypse fanfic? Just an assumption.

Raph promptly closed both his eyes, and felt as Mikey squeezed his hand, leading him forwards. Raph squeezed his hand back. It felt so little in his big hand, which was ironic as Mikey had the biggest hands out of both Donnie and Leo.

This little detail right here concerning Mikey's hands. He does indeed have hands that are bigger than both Donnie's and Leo's.

Donnie hissed loudly. “Raph, you are squishing us, he whisper-shouted as to not wake Splinter!” Raph let out a watery chuckle, setting them down, smiling through his tears. Leo gave Raph a smile in return, patting his arm. “There there, Big Red. Now, if you aren’t going to pass out on us or something, we do happen to have gifts made.” Raph brightened, quickly and rather roughly rubbing the tears away with the heel of his palms. “Raph ain’t no wimp.” He retorted with a wet laugh. “There’ll be no passin’ out.”

Lol, Raph and his low iron deficiency, always passing out. Leo, once again is being the medic of the team, making sure his big iron deficient brother isn't going to pass out on them lol.

Leo began to ramble. “It wasn’t very hard to make, y’know with being the medic and all, cause I’m already good at stitches, so I decided to make this, but I dunno, its honestly not that good, but I mean, hey if you like it then,--” Leo fell silent when Raph cut him off. “I love it.” Was all he said, voice gentle and broken up by his purring.

This is such a cute headcanon!! Leo being able to sew because he's practiced doing stitches is so cute!! Especially as many people headcanon that Raph can knit and/or crochet.

[basil-appreciation-comic]

IMPORTANT UPDATE!!

the comic is cancelled. you probably already assumed that since i havent posted anything about it in a while but yeah the things dead now lol. mainly because i dont care much about omori anymore, the comic sucked, and it was too much effort. i feel kinda bad about leaving you guys in the dark for this long tho, so i thought id go ahead and include all the scrapped stuff for the comic that never got finished

while i was writing the comic i started a google doc that laid out ideas i had for future pages. heres that if you wanna know how the story ends

it was written over several months and (most) things are in order of where they go on the timeline not when i wrote them so it might be a little hard to follow

also some art i never posted

(at least i dont think ive posted the last one)

i quoted not liking this comic as one of the reasons i stopped so let me explain that with a list of things id change about this if i were to remake it (which i wont)

remove the swearing that was so stupid

make omori mute (and probably use sign language)

omori does not express fear or stress in-game, thats sunnys job. quit it

he also does not cry and generally shows emotions (even the big ones) in more subtle ways (which i think i was trying to shift towards later in the doc) idk why he was so emotional all the time

literally everything about how i portrayed omori actually that was all just awful

the panic attack scene is fucking embarrassing i have no clue what i was thinking. im so sorry for writing it like that i did 0 research beforehand

make it shorter why did i think that would work out

id probably just make it a fic, comics take way too much outta me compared to just writing things

it does not need a big epic ending and probably shouldve ended not long after they escaped black space

the romance is horrible but thats the foundation of the comic so idek what id do about that

stop making everyone talk like therapists 24/7

and yeah it has a lot of problems but i still do care about this due to the ammount of effort and love ive put into it, i just cant and dont want to continue it

so yeah thats where this story ends ig. i had a lot of fun along the way, and thank you so much for all the support. bigger thanks to that one sunflower discord server (if you came from there you know which one) for being my main motivation and support throughout this journey. sucks this comic never got to see its full potential but im relieved to finally lay it to rest. the blog will stay up for archival purposes but i will not continue the comic any further obviously. the ask box will remain open if you wanna say anything or if you have a question about the story or whatever. thanks for reading.

[rainbowsky]

Hi Rainbowsky

Hope you are doing well.

Happy Halloween!! Hope you enjoyed your day well!!

Few days back, I was reading a fanfic where the plot was OOL shooting and some photo leaks BTS causing ripples in yizhan relationship..

I know it's a fic, but the plot is so real.. I just wanted to know was there something like this back then...

Coz in those times I was not into turtledom so I have no Idea..

Hi Anon, Thanks, I did enjoy my Halloween! I hope you did too! 👻

Fake, fan fiction, CPN.

There were some set photos (props for the show) that were 'leaked' at one point and caused a stir among some turtles, and often held up by antis to try to hurt turtles. HOWEVER.

That does not mean they caused any stir at all in GGDD's relationship. Remember, they are both actors and know full well what that entails. IMNSHO there is zero chance that DD was upset in any way by the photos.

Perhaps you don't need this reminder, Anon, but just for the sake of it I want to reiterate that fan fiction is fiction, even - and I'd say especially - when the plot seems real or follows the real timeline of events.

Fan fiction about GG and DD is totally invented, and authors have no special insight into GG and DD's feelings, thoughts or real life experiences. It's their job as writers to bring stories to life and make them seem credible, but no matter how credible it seems, it's still entirely fictional.

I know that sounds lecturey and obvious, but you have no idea how many times during my years in this fandom that I've had stories from fan fiction reported to me as 'things that actually happened', and seen fans vehemently argue that fictional events were real.

Fan fiction is an open frontier. People can write whatever they want. But the more a story follows real events about real people, the more it stresses me out. There are unfortunately a lot of people who have a hard time distinguishing between fiction and reality.

And this is something that can creep up on just about anyone without their realizing. Turtles are faced with a TON of information from various sources, so much that it's hard to keep up. The more fandom information we take in over time the easier it is for us to forget where we saw or heard something, and to accidentally mistake something we read in a fic for something that actually happened.

This is why I vastly prefer AU stories over ones that try to build a narrative around actual events and fictionalize GGDD's real lives. I 100% support people's right to write 'fandom timeline' stories if they want to, but that doesn't mean I'll enjoy them or recommend them.

So while you read these stories, Anon, please keep in mind that very important point:

Fan fiction is fiction. Always.

It's also very common for turtles, including fan fic authors, to glamorize or romanticize jealousy. There's nothing romantic about jealousy. It's a very toxic emotion that can lead to bad - even dangerous - behavior. I personally believe it's insulting toward GG and DD to paint either one of them as 'the jealous type'.

There's a huge amount of disinformation floating around about the OOL photos, including claims that DD was wildly jealous and totally freaked out over them. I find that notion absurd and even offensive. It is insulting to DD's level of emotional intelligence, and makes uncharitable assumptions about his level of trust and respect for GG.

As I said, GG and DD are actors, and they know what that entails.

More on that here.

You can read more about the photos in some of my past posts.

The photos and turtles reactions

Confirmation they were fake props

Why some people believed they were real

[timextoxhajima]

what's the right word?

my first kpop group was snsd when they first released gee back in 2009/2010 and i was 9/10.

i've been stuck in this hole of 'kpop' since. i turn 24 in april. thats more than half my life.

growing up in a conservative asian family and the elder daughter of two teachers, it's not easy to explain the grievances and troubles i feel like i've experienced. some might not even consider it a terrible thing. yes, i've had a good standard of education and had parents who took care of me but sometimes the challenge was truly connecting with people and finding an emotional support.

nobody else can replicate and/or understand the true depth of the love, admiration, inspiration and reliance a fan has on her favourite idols/groups. throughout the years, i've gone through the eras. going from the snsd/shinee/suju era, and then into the bts/exo/vixx/bap era, and then blackpink/red velvet/wanna one/nct and then i feel like my life had a significant trajectory in the 2019-2020 period because i started dancing.

after having spent a decade being so invested in the idol culture of perfecting every single performance, pushing past boundaries and the idea of 'not being enough' being the exact source of motivation, perhaps picking up cover-dancing wasn't the best idea. especially when i come in a package with a bunch of baggage, anxiety, stress, and other perfectionist ideals.

throughout the years before 2019/2020, my reliance on my kpop idols was emotional. i wrote letters to them like they were my best friends, wished them the best of health and that they were always enough, while wishing i was as good as they were (ironic?). to my past loves: sooyoung, donghae, minho, jonghyun, jungkook, baekhyun, kang daniel, irene, jaehyun and the other members who have helped me through alot - i owe my life to them. quite literally.

tbz and enhypen have a special place in my heart. because not only did they become the usual emotional support pillars i had all the while, they became my mentors. an actual source to learn and be better. enhypen even more, because i've covered at least 5-6 of their items.

this growth in myself and the growth i see in them was so quiet but so sudden last night as i filmed their performances. 'oh my god, i danced to this song back in 2022 and now i get to see it live?'

as a fan, i feel more emotional because not only am i a fan who enjoys their music, i feel like i had connected to them on the 'stage performer' level and though i'm still lacking in many, many ways, i owe my progress and improvement to enhypen. they push me both mentally and physically during practises and their want to surpass themselves always reminds me that love knows no boundaries. the love for the stage and the love to be the best version of yourself.

i'm quite sure there's some psychological term for it, when you rely on someone who doesn't know you exist, and that you gain energy just from this person's existence.

the story is much, much longer but i could write a whole fic about it if i wanted to.

to my strength, my (probably last) love, heeseung.

i could write a billion words about you, and it would still not be enough to share how much of my life, my success, my motivation, my strength i owe to you. the love between a fan and an idol can only go so far, but i promise it will be forever.

i have a knack for choosing the members who seem to be the 'ace' of the group, but you are so unapologetically open about being a perfectionist. that's just my opinion. you know you want to be at your best, and you strive so hard to get there, sometimes i almost feel sad that you think you're not yet perfect. but then again, that's the very thing that makes me look up to you.

saw you for the first time and probably the last time last night. thank you for reigniting this want to surpass myself in every way possible. thank you for reminding me that lacking is the only way up.

[caspersickfanfics]

aoxlfkakgjqkksajflqakahskcjabsjc

I am. Undone. I need 10-12 business days to recover from your fic 😭😭😭 (but like in the best way possible!!!)

angst like with partners fighting is Honeslty so scary to read sometimes!!! But!!! SOMEHOW you paint this beautiful picture of real and RAW upset and hurt and flaws AND ITS STILL OKAY IN THE END!!! there’s something so healing about that??? Like hello????? Because their bond is so much deeper than moments like this. I LOVED how vulnerable Tighnari was, his high standards for himself and his really VALID frustrations!!! Fuck that guy that sabotaged their letters that’s so (clever of you) but EVIL!! But also like, I loved his very human mistakes too! And his even more human break down 🥺🥺 he sounded so terrible and Just sooo defeated. I like to think Cyno stayed for days just silently but very specifically doting on him, making sure he had gentle foods to eat, extra protective, extra silly, and super reluctant to leave.

speaking of I know Tighnari is our caretaker king but I think cyno simply excels at creating safety and holding space for Tighnari. Cuz the anxiety he must have felt was so real!! I was feeling it as a reader lol 😂 but he trusts nari and chooses to breath and wait and meditate- like that’s so honestly goals and such a healthy response!!’ And then after that he’s just more than anything ready to hold Tighnari and meet him wherever he is and protect his heart and - GAAAAAH I can’t!!!!!! Like he may need a bit more instruction on how to heal people in the literal sense but I’m convinced he heals Tighnairs heart over and over again. 😭😭😭😭 this was so good- OH and the ENDING!!! so sweet and fluffy 🩷🩷🩷 I was so glad that nari was able to begin to relax a little, and make a joke WITH cyno aaaaaaahhhhhh!!!! My HEART!!! and just nari scooping Cyno back because he demands more cuddles. Beautiful. I’m so proud of them I love them. I want what they have 😭😭 I LOVE your cynari fics!!

!!!!!!!!!!!! THANK YOU?!?!? give me some days to cover recover from this ask please i have melted into a teary-eyed puddle

Okay, attempting to be coherent - I'm really glad you enjoyed it despite the extra tension of arguments. I had points while writing this where it was very stressful because of that, but I honestly just wrote and re-wrote until I found the words to make it comfortable for me, without taking away from the bite and the conflict. It ended up being surprisingly healing. I like the idea that emotions, even when they aren't expressed in the best ways, exist to inform us about ourselves and the people around us in a way that words sometimes fail, so I wanted to make sure something good would come from the conflict, in the end. I'm not sure I'm expressing this well, but - they care about each other enough to see bad behavior and go "that was wrong, but I still care about the hurt that's behind it because I trust your goodness and love your whole" and I think they are stronger for it (both individually and as a unit).

And yes that evil guy is not gonna have a fun time when Cyno's back at work 😈

Tighnari 🥺 he had such a rough time, our little fox guy. He was under so much stress already and the migraine and the storm on top of it :( If I were a fluff writer I'd absolutely write a whole extra chapter of Cyno coddling him, because he deserves it. They'd also figure out an actual plan for getting both of their needs met - Tighnari needing support with Collei, Cyno balancing that with his job demands. They probably set up weekly check-ins, so that if the communication is ever disturbed again, they'll know right away.

Regarding Cyno - outside of the unresolved trauma (it's there, but not always making itself known), I guess I headcanon him as being quite emotionally healthy! He doubts himself a lot because the trauma bits feel uncontrollable, but he's a good listener, and he cares, and I like to think he had to learn a pretty extensive degree of emotional control to manage Hermanubis at a very young age. There are some complexities there, where his initial instinct for himself is to numb or push the emotions away, associating strong feelings with danger and damage, but he has to have some logical understanding that emotions become dangerous when they're ignored for too long. So he tries to keep things unpacked, even if he prefers to do that when he's alone. Of course, he misses things sometimes.

All this to say - I agree!!! I think he manages his own worries and concerns and even grief really well in this fic. He knows they're there, takes a step back to check himself, and either embraces the feels or sets them aside for later based on what's most needed and productive for the situation. It goes along with "endurance vs. patience" - endurance relating to withstand poor circumstances (which is how he (correctly) interprets/internalizes Nari's temper); patience relating to response to wrongdoings (why the evildoer will have a Very Bad Time with Cyno). (No one asked but I interpret Tighnari as someone with a great capacity for both of these, but who is selective with when to utilize them)

Ugh the ending - I was cringing at myself and them but I now have a Need to include a bad Cyno joke whenever I write him 🤣 I am glad it added a bit of fluff and healing as well though!!

Wow I apologize for such a long response and like, an entire unsolicited character analysis, I think I'm still processing my own feelings about this fic 😂 😭 If anyone reads this far... thank you for your time?? ^^;;

[farfromstrange]

OKAY.

I’ve got something to share with you!!

So, you guys remember when I said that I had an idea for a new Michael Kinsella fic a while back?

Well, whatever you think you’re about to read, this little news of mine is different, I assure you. But go ahead and read anyway if you find enjoyment in my writing regardless of fandom.

So: As it turns out, the idea I had was way too complex for a fanfic. I carried it around with me for a while, started writing down ideas and that’s when it all took a turn.

Writing for Kin these past few months kind of challenged me to broaden my horizons from the action and supernatural elements I put into my Matt fics, and while I love writing that side of fanfiction, it was also fun to explore something more human.

I’ve been writing pretty dark stuff from the beginning, and as you know I also write a lot of porn. I love dark romance books, I love angst and I love morally grey characters.

My first ever original book idea was also fantasy, and while I’ve spent months planning that one, I never got around to writing it.

HOWEVER!!

When I started writing Butterfly Effect, it sent a stone rolling, and then Chaos Theory happened, and it helped me explore other areas of fiction. I was afraid of diving into Kin, but I did it and it was the best choice I could have made.

The amount of planning I put into the story so far is surreal. The feedback I keep getting makes me feel so appreciated, and I’ve realized that building and writing for morally grey and damaged characters is what I do best. In all genres, really.

While writing this series, I noticed how much easier it is to shape characters when they don’t have any special powers. Like, it is so much easier when they’re just psychologically complex people, and I bow down to everyone who has no problem creating superpowers for their characters because it always takes me so long to get it all planned out. That is a superpower in itself. And while I love it, exploring this new side of my writing is very, very exciting, and I can just write very human humans if that makes sense to you.

Don’t get me wrong, I love writing for Matt and I love working on Foreigner’s God, but writing something about a bunch of normal human beings gave me a joy I had been lacking before. And it makes it so much easier to write.

Don’t worry, I am not switching things up or anything. But I have something else to tell you that directly connects to Kin and Charlie Cox, really, because without him, I would have never gotten back into writing, I would have never started doing Tumblr and AO3, and I would have never watched Kin.

This Mikey fic transitioned into an original idea, and I am so excited right now because I have officially started my first original story!!

I have it all planned out, and while I am still working on the characters, the profiles are slowly coming together as I write. And I owe it all to the Daredevil fandom being obsessed with Kin and me jumping into it for Charlie. Thanks to you all and our shared love for Charlie and his impeccable acting, I think I might have found my niche.

I know you came here for the fanfiction and I will continue writing it as normal, but I was so stressed the past weeks, I had to channel my emotions into something and that’s kind of what brought this to life. I needed an escape. I just wanted you all to be the first ones to find out because you have all been so supportive and I couldn’t wait telling you that I’m starting to put something of my own together.

I was also inspired by that one interview Charlie did for Kin where he said he had no idea that organized crime in Ireland was such a problem, and I did some research into it because I had no idea either, and that shit is scary. I was always like ‘omg the Italian mafia is the only one we always hear about in books’ and stuff like that, but I don’t think I’ve ever heard anyone mention the Irish mob before, so I was surprised, but also intrigued because if we romanticize the Italian mafia in fiction so much, why not the Irish one?

Yeah, you can tell what the story is inspired by if you have watched Kin. And you can tell by the name I used for my main character that Daredevil will always have a special place in my heart (but also because I love the name Matthew, don’t attack me).

AND I took some inspiration from all the fics I wrote, especially when it comes to the names of my characters because I’ve already created OC’s, why not steal some of their traits? They deserve their time to shine. They’re a piece of me, after all. They’re all variants.

So, for those who are interested:

The book I’m working on is Dark Romance. It’s like Kin meets Killing Eve meets Taylor Swift’s Reputation.

The trope: Enemies to lovers.

Title: Checkmate.

It’s not written in stone yet, so just read it for fun or don’t read it at all; I’m just so proud of myself right now. Who knows if this will ever see the light of day, but I share everything with you all already, so maybe you DO care. I don’t know. I’m bad at this.

Basically, it’s ‘mob boss meets female assassin tasked to kill him, but she can’t kill him’. And they’re all morally grey.

I’ve written a little description for myself. It isn’t the official blurb because I want to finish the story first, but to give you a little insight, this is my idea so far:

“Checkmate occurs when a king is placed in check and has no legal ways to escape. That's the law of chess.

In a world of high-stakes assassinations, an assassin dubbed The King reigns supreme. However, unlike popular opinion, The King is not a man, she's a woman, and she is more dangerous than any man could ever be.

Recruited from prison and ruthlessly trained by the Four-Thirty-Two, a lethal organization that has turned contract killing into a lucrative business, she takes only one type of job – eliminating men she deems monsters.

Her next target: Matthew Callahan, a reputed figure in the Irish mafia.

As she delves deeper into Matthew's life though, the man she thought was a heartless criminal shows a side that challenges everything she's believed. Secrets unfold, and a conspiracy emerges, intertwining their fates in a way neither of them saw coming.

It soon becomes clear that she is capable of many things, but she can't kill Matthew Callahan, and she definitely can't stay away from him either. He draws her in like a moth to a flame, and she is highly susceptible to the pleasure of desire. But there is something else about him that she can't shake.

She can't kill him, that much she knows, but is she capable of loving something other than the thrill of the kill?

In a deadly game of cat and mouse, life and death blur, and she must decide where her loyalties truly lie.

A king can't checkmate another king unless there are too many kings on the board. And once the king finds his queen, there is nothing they wouldn't do for each other, even if it means burning the world down together.”

(The assassin organization has a hierarchy based on a chess board’s hierarchy, by the way, that’s why the story is titled the way it is AND that’s why the organization is called the way it is)

I feel like I just wrote an essay and I am afraid of the teacher’s feedback. But yeah, this is what I have so far and I’ve also started writing, but I’m not gonna share that just yet because it’s still in the works.

I think I’m 10k words in so far.

I just had to share this with you because ever since I started writing at like ten years old, my biggest dream was to be able to write my own books one day. I never felt like I had enough ideas, so I took on fanfiction, and that’s when I realized that I CAN build stories and have people like them, and that there might be hope for me after all.

I’ve been waiting for an idea to come around for a while, and the other book I have planned never made it out of the notebook. Doesn’t mean I won’t write it, but somehow this is easier. It really came to me in a dirty ass hotel room before the Harry Styles concert, and it started out as a fic idea. Look how far I’ve come since May.

CRAZY.

If you do want to read a snippet, let me know. Or not. I don’t know. I’m kinda shaking in my boots. It’s just an idea, and it might still change. God, I’m too nervous sharing this. It’s like a heart attack.

Anyway, thanks for staying with me, I gotta get back to packing for my move in five weeks now 🏃🏼‍♀️ (not at all running away in fear or anything nooo)

Bonus:

Possible book cover made by me. Will be edited once the official blurb is finished. (Yes, I do have Photoshop, I’m just very self-critical and barely show anything I make lol)

(The code at the bottom isn’t real. I just put it there so I can see if it would fit)

Okay, that’s it. Bye!

*excitedly runs out of here*