#this was like a version of an AU i'm writing a totally different way

[n1ightw1ng]

Jason accidentally shoots Tim out of the sky. When he attempts to retrieve him, he finds he has mysteriously disappeared.

[no warnings | T | gen | 432 words]

He was sick of this ninja bullshit. Sure, he could be swift and agile and all that, but he wasn’t built for it, and it was a real pain in his ass when he was facing down a bunch of slippery little assassin-types who wouldn’t stay still long enough to take a punch. He shot one in the foot, which slowed him long enough to distract Jason and leave him open for a throwing star to the thigh. That stung. 

What he’d really like was for the fuckers to actually get tired, or reveal why they were here, or something other than being a pain in his ass. There were three of them, probably, but it was hard to tell with the identical uniforms and all the jumping and running. One was injured. He…wasn’t doing so well solo-ing this, but they hadn’t killed him yet, either.

Down the street, a shadow flicked across the alley, faint over the street lights. He lined up the shot and took it. Bang.

In a flash of yellow and green, his target whirled to the ground.

Yellow. And. Green. Oh, fuck. He sprinted over the rooftops, grappling when he couldn’t clear the gaps on his own. And when he finally reached the scene–nothing. All that remained was a smear of blood on the concrete. “Robin?” He called out, hoping, desperately, that the kid was quick enough to pull himself into the shadows, but there’d be a trail. The alley and its dark corners yawned on in silence. Gone without a trace, and with him, the assassins.

That…couldn’t be good. For the first time in weeks, he clicked on the communications channel in his helmet, and the whole thing sprung to life with the crackle of voices. Oracle read out an address, Steph responded that she and Orphan would be there. Bruce–ugh, Bruce–warned them that Poison Ivy was wreaking havoc at the Gotham Butterfly Garden.

He took in a deep breath. “This—this is Red Hood.” Sharp silence. “I think I just shot Red Robin.”

“Do you have eyes on him?” Oracle asked. She didn’t miss a beat.

“No. I came to recover the—the—him,” not the body, not the body, “and he’s gone. Like, gone-gone. Not here.”

“Did you shoot him on purpose,” Damian snarled in his ears.

“Fuck–no, I’ve been fighting these Goddamn ninja fuckers all night and I thought he was one of them. Now he’s gone, and they’re gone too, and I have a bad fuckin’ feeling about that.”

Another silence. “League of Assassins,” Damian said, finally, “they wouldn’t take him if he wasn’t alive.”

[the-s1lly-corner]

Their ideal partners

Silly little hcs because ive been thinking what each of the lads look for in a s/o

Slenderman;

Given I'm aiming for the "he's been observing humans for centuries and has grown used to their antics," vibe with him, I feel like he'd like someone who keeps him guessing

Nothing TOO crazy, because he can be irritable, but if you intrigue him he'll definitely stay around

Does he have any peculiar icks? Tastes?

Can't stand messy people... doesn't mind if its unorganized, or a chaotic system, but if you live in muck it's a deal breaker

Doesn't care what you look like, or what gender you are; he sees beyond that because, again, ancient being that's been watching humans for a long time.. kinda desensitized to that sort of thing

Laughing Jack;

He WANTS someone who can match his energy; but he NEEDS someone who can mellow him out

As much as I hate the "I can fix/change him" thing (well I dont HATE it, it really matters on execution and all), Jack needs someone who can make him chill out a bit

Icks? You know those people who kill the energy in a room? Like total buzzkill + downers? He doesnt like those. Not like the "he hates depressed people" way, obviously, but in the way that

Okay so idk if this is just a me thing but I come across a lot of people who do it on purpose for attention/quirkiness, those are the kinds of people he doesnt like

Like slenderman, he doesnt really care what you look like; bros gonna slip himself around you like a snake (affectionately)

Eyeless Jack;

Right off the bat he needs someone who's understanding

It ain't easy being a cursed man who's forced to eat human meat

Someone who's willing to listen to what happened to him, and help him see the brighter side of things

Basically a "storm cloud x sunshine" ship dynamic

Icks? As long as you're not too chaotic or hyper he's fine with it; Jack is more quiet and reserved energy wise, stress tends to make the curses symptoms worse

Prefers short people; he himself is also short (I hc hes about 5'5), and he's a lil insecure, but he's not totally opposed to dating taller people

Masky;

Writing for specifically masky for this one instead of the usual tim, hope that's alright!! I just wanna flesh out him n hoodie more

Bro is kinda..... whouf... rough around the edges; kinda feral

Not like FERAL feral, but this is the kind of dude who tunnels on someone during his work and wont be afraid to body slam into stuff full speed/force

So naturally, he gets hurt a lot. So a caring and soft partner is an immediate go to; especially since in my hc/au tim still exists, just as a different.. persona? Headspace? I really dont know the correct terms <\3

He likes observing as well, but he'll occasionally join in on whatever activity you're doing!!

Icks? Loud people... I would say spontaneous people as well, but considering my take on him, he kinda falls into a softcore version of that category

Hoodie;

Very similar to masky, but also not... between the two hes more.. calm and calculating; whereas Masky tends to dive straight in, in most cases

Should not that neither of them verbally speak; so they both need a partner who's fine with physical touch since that's one of their main ways of communicating/showing affection

Especially with hoodie; dude always has a hand on you and guiding you in some way

Unlike all the others, hoodie does not have ANY preferences for partners. Doesn't matter the personality, body type, and he doesnt have many icks

Like

Probably doesnt like arrogance, kinda just annoys him.... but hey, makes his.. job.. easier

[brynthewriter]

Masterpost

Hi everyone! If you don't know me, my main blog is @op-sys-chaos and I write both original content and fanfiction. I wanted to have a blog specifically to talk about the things I'm writing, so that's this!

If you'd like to quickly recieve updates for any of my works, please subscribe to the individual post I'll be making for each of these that are incomplete! (I'll make a subscription post and a discussions post so people can have a place to follow for updates and a place to talk about it for each without spamming the subscribed people.) Updates will not be consistent for any of these.

Without further ado, here's the masterlist of everything I've created or am working on, with links attached to the titles and lists for the associated posts below:

Fics:

The Pit Made Me Do It (And I'm So Sorry)

Would you sacrifice someone’s life for the sake of your own sanity? What if it wasn’t your choice? Recovering from the Madness induced by the Pit now giving way to the second stage of revival. Pit Rage. A primal state numb to the world and driven only by the desire of one goal. Said goal once complete, would give Jason his emotions, his sanity, his life back. It should be easy, at least it would be if his goal was anything else. But the Pits cost is steep, and so is the burden of a mind set on watching the light drain from the eyes of Timothy Drake.

Chapters: 9/12

Words: 24,409

Fandom: DC

Beta reader: @batfambrainrotbeloved (they also wrote the summary for the fic!)

An AU where the Lazarus Pit effects work differently and it affects Jason Todd's journey.

Subscription Post

Discussion Post

When You Break The Universe, The Universe Breaks You

Tim fractured the universe with a magical spell to swap his place with the place of Jason Todd moments before his death. What will happen?

Works Total in Series: 3

The Fragmentation (completed, chapters: 2/2, words: 2,376, written together but mostly by @brucewaynehater101)

Fragmented Universe: the Hope of a Wraith (chapters: 3/?, words: 6,246, written by me)

Fragmented Universe: It Simply Ends (completed, chapters: 1/1, words: 5,032, written by @brucewaynehater101)

Words Total: 13,654

Fandom: DC

Beta reader: @brucewaynehater101 and I are beta reading each others' fics in this series! @batfambrainrotbeloved is also helping to beta for the Hope of a Wraith.

A massive series of many AUs based off of that description! I’m writing this in collaboration with @brucewaynehater101 so go check them out!

Subscription Post

Discussion Post

A Message From the Dead

Danny Fenton and Damian Wayne are long-lost twins. Damian thinks Danny died at 6. Danny thinks Damian is still in the League of Assassins. When a video message informing him of Danny's existence arrives in Bruce Wayne's inbox, having been auto-sent after 3 days of Danny being away from his computer, can he find his son in time?

Works Total in Series: 4

A Message From the Dead (completed, chapters: 1/1, words: 459, written by me)

A Message From the Dead: Looking for a Ghost (chapters: 2/?, words: 1,759, written by me)

A Message From the Dead: Biggest Regret (chapters: 1/?, words: 1,877, written by @rin-may-1103)

A Message From the Dead: A Sister's Love (chapters: 1/?, words: 686, written by me)

Words Total: 4,781

Fandom: DC

Beta reader: n/a, message me if you want to!

Based off a prompt I posted on my main blog, @op-sys-chaos, I decided to write this out as a full fic. Other people also wrote their own versions, so I offered for them to join me in posting them together on AO3! So far, @thevoidstaredback and @rin-may-1103 are the only two people involved in the series, but if anyone else wants to be involved, let me know!

Subscription Post

Discussion Post

Not So Artificial Intelligence

Technus traps Danny in the Batcomputer. For his own safety, he pretends to be a new AI system on their computer. This has consequences.

Chapters: 3/?

Words: 3,077

Fandom: DPxDC

Beta reader: n/a, message me if you want to!

DPxDC fic based on this prompt by @corkinavoid!!

Subscription Post

Discussion Post

Weirdly Competent

Danny Fenton studied medicine under Frostbite. Because of this, he has a lot of medical expertise when it comes to working with a lot of different species, including Kryptonians and Martians. The doctors on the Watchtower who hired him did not know that he had experience and thought he was just talking back, so they fired him on day one. A few days later they tried one of his suggestions. To their surprise, it worked. The Justice League now has questions about Danny, starting with "Why the hell did you fire him??"

Chapters: 5/?

Words: 3,017

Fandom: DPxDC

Beta reader: @soupteeth

DPxDC Doctor!Danny fic based on this prompt by @bet-on-me-13!!

Subscription Post

Discussion Post

A King, a Demon, and a Cult Walk Into a Summoning Circle

Danny is sacrificed by a cult to a demon as the batfamily rushes to save him. The terrifying demon demands that they put him back where they found him immediately.

Chapters: 2/?

Words: 2,030

Fandom: DPxDC

Beta reader: n/a, message me if you want to!

Danny being a casual badass without lifting a finger, based on this prompt I wrote!

Subscription Post

Discussion Post

Twins, or What It Takes to be Resurrected

Danny Fenton and Damian Wayne were twins, separated at 7 years old when Talia saw Danny's hesitation to kill and let him choose a normal life. Now, Damian Wayne has found his brother, and has come to him for help. Because Damian is dead, and his long lost twin is his only hope for resurrection. All Danny has to do to bring Damian back is to convincingly pretend to be his brother, who he hasn't seen for the better part of a decade, at a fancy gala. Can he do it, or will the twins be caught?

Chapters: 7/10

Words: 12,329

Fandom: DPxDC

Beta reader: n/a, message me if you want to!

A demon twins au based on this prompt I wrote where Damian is dead and Danny has to pretend to be his long lost brother in order to bring him back.

Subscription Post

Discussion Post

In Another Life

Danny Fenton died young. Wanting another chance at life, he reincarnated as Dick Grayson, not realizing that he would keep his powers when he did so. How does this affect the timeline? You'll see :)

Chapters: 13/22

Words: 25,919

Fandom: DPxDC

Beta reader: n/a, message me if you want to!

Based on this prompt by by @indingojazz, @stealingyourbones, and me! Danny Fenton dies at 16 and, after dying so young, decides he wants another chance at life. So he reincarnates, becoming a young boy named Dick Grayson. Surely, his past won't ever become relevant. ...Right?

Subscription Post

Discussion Post

Goodbye. Love, Tim

If you want pure angst, only read chapter one. The first line of this summary is for you. If you're like me and you want angst to have a happy ending, read the whole thing! The whole summary is for you. Tim's had enough. Enough of the murder attempts. Enough of his siblings doubting him. So he calls them to say he's leaving. Or, at least, that's what Dick hears Tim say over the phone. But is that really what he feels?

Chapters: 5/5

Words: 3,986

Fandom: DC

Beta reader: no beta reader, though I did give two people a sneak peek before posting it!

Obligatory "Tim's had enough and leaves the batfamily fic" but with a twist. If you just want the angst of him leaving, read chapter 1. But if you want the twist and the happy ending, read the whole thing! I promise it gets better. I also tried to use only canon content for this rather than making the batfamily treat Tim worse like most of these fics do.

Discussion Post

Watching Waynes

Dick Grayson has a great idea. Bruce has been acting like an idiot in public for a long time, and no one takes him seriously enough to think he's Batman. So what if the whole family did that? And what better way to do it than together? Taking inspiration from Keeping Up with the Kardashians, Dick convinces his family to create a reality TV show with him, centered around their lives. One which they would use to show the public that they're just too ridiculous to ever be superheroes. This story will follow a different format from the rest of my fics, since I'm actually describing the episodes. I'll mention things like camera angles and cuts between camera shots in the story. It may be a bit of a weird format to read it in, but I hope you enjoy it anyway! I'll also include people reflecting on the episodes at the end, whether it's the Waynes looking at what they've done or their superhero friends laughing at their nonsense. I hope you all enjoy!!

Chapters: 1/?

Words: 6,274

Fandom: DC

Beta reader: n/a, message me if you want to!

Based on this prompt by @fckbatmanhiskidsareminenow, the Waynes create a reality show called Watching Waynes. It's based on the concept of Keeping Up with the Kardashians, where a film crew follows these celebrities around and films all of their nonsense.

Subscription Post

Discussion Post

What Did He Do to Save Me?

Danny Fenton was reincarnated as Bruce Wayne's oldest biological child. This wouldn't be an issue for anyone, except Damian was born with a hole in his heart that could only be fixed by Danny splitting his core in half. Now, Danny is perpetually exhausted and barely able to move. But despite all of that, he still loves his siblings. And he's about to find out how much they love him back, when Damian finds out the lengths Danny went to to save him as a baby and decides to return the favor.

Chapters: 3/?

Words: 7,114

Fandom: DPxDC

Beta reader: n/a, message me if you want to!

Based on this prompt by @hyperfixationherewecome and me! Danny Fenton as Danny Wayne sickfic, where the very person he became sick saving fights to save him in return!

Subscription Post

Discussion Post

To Be a Parent

(title is a work in progress, I'd love suggestions!)

Jazz and Jason’s one night stand was just that, as far as Jason knew: a one night stand. They hadn’t exchanged numbers or last names, so he never expected to see her again. But to his surprise, he ran into her nearly six years later with a five year old girl named Ellie who, judging by the timing, is almost certainly his. Jason is a father. And he’s not sure he’s ready for it. Now, Jason is involved in Jazz’s life, trying to help raise his daughter and bonding with the woman he once fell for. But will it become something more? Or will Jason’s life as the Red Hood drag everything down? Jazz’s little sister Ellie, Danny’s clone, was dying. The only way to save her was to de-age her and put her core into the body of an unborn baby, allowing her to be born and live her life again. Jazz always wanted a kid anyway, so she volunteered to be the one to have the kid and raise Ellie. For the next five years, she raised her daughter as a single mother in college,. But now, the man she hooked up with is back in her life, and Jazz can’t say she’s upset about it. But can he handle her family’s weirdness? Or will he run before Jazz can get to know him better?

Chapters: 4/?

Words: 4,151 (910 written by @sistertotheknowitall)

Fandom: DPxDC

Beta reader: n/a, message me if you want to!

Based on this prompt by @sistertotheknowitall, Jazz and Jason raise their daughter, a reborn Ellie. I'm also going to make this be an eventual Jazz/Jason/Roy fic because why not. I'm starting out with just Jazz/Jason though.

Subscription Post

Discussion Post

Clones and Their Consequences

Danny Fenton is Bruce Wayne's clone, and the people who cloned him activated and then brainwashed Zur En Arrh to be a killer. Specifically, to kill Batman. Danny managed to regain control of his body and get away, being adopted by the Fentons. But while taking down a GIW base with Dani, he finds his creators, who activate Zur En Arrh once more. Will Danny ever be free of Zur En Arrh? Can Dani save her clone template's clone template from her clone template? ...And how on earth are they going to figure out that complicated dynamic? Will Batman learn about his clone? How will he react?

Chapters: 1/?

Words: 1,053

Fandom: DPxDC

Beta reader: n/a, message me if you want to!

Danny is a clone of Bruce Wayne, whose Zur En Arrh alternate personality was brainwashed to kill Bruce. He spent a lone time free. But when he gets rebrainwashed, Dani must free him before Danny can kill Bruce. And after that, they must find a way to get rid of Zur En Arrh.

Subscription Post

Discussion Post

Original Works:

(I've posted all of these on StoryForge, so the links all redirect there. If you don't have an account, you should make one; it's free, and the platform is helping small writers get published!)

Aegis

When one of the leaders of the world's top hero team crashes back to the ground after a fight, everyone assumes he's dead. There was no way he survived at the speed he was falling. Except he did. And he woke up in a crater, no memory of his past and one of the leaders of the world's most infamous villain team standing over him, reaching out a hand. What happens when an amnesiac hero whose friends think he's dead is found by a group of supervillains? Especially when those supervillains have more to their story than meets the eye...

Chapters: Prologue only, on hiatus

Words: 657

Beta read by people in the discord server for it, message me if you want the link!

(I'm writing out character backstories in full before I write out any more of Aegis, so the novel itself is on hiatus. Please note, I will likely be making an audiobook version of it myself once it’s done and posting it on like YouTube or something. But you’re still welcome to do your own version of it if you want! Ik some people love making podfics and some people read exclusively audio content so I wanted to clarify.)

Feather: Hero of Old

Feather was a well-known hero 60 years ago. So how did they end up on a modern-day superhero team? This is Feather's journey that led up to them joining the Order of Aegis.

Chapters: 1/1

Words: 3,758

Beta read by people in the discord server for it, message me if you want the link!

Backstory for Aegis character Feather

Aberration and Maximum Security... House Arrest?

Before he joined the Order of Aegis, Aberration had a... complicated past. Although, after living for over 2000 years, who wouldn't? However, the most complicated part of his past was the part where he got stuck in jail for 400 years and how that sentence got downgraded to maximum security house arrest after some time. This is the story of how that happened. Trigger warnings: serial killer, jail, graphic descriptions of murder, miscellaneous violence. See story description for ways to avoid the triggering parts

Chapters: 8/8

Words: 20,056

Beta read by people in the discord server for it, message me if you want the link!

Backstory for Aegis character Aberration

The Queens of Saveria

So, I got inspired by @theactorbat on TikTok and wrote a short story. It's a story about two women who are pulled away from their girlfriends and into an arranged marriage with each other. They come up with a creative solution to make sure everyone's happy (and no, the solution is not them mutually running away with the one they love), and they get to have a happy ending. If you like fluffy romance stories, give it a read!

Chapters: 1/1

Words: 4,293

Not beta read, and finished already, but if you have edits let me know! It's basically a first draft since I barely edited it.

This is a short story I wrote in response to a writing prompt. It's very much a rough draft but if you want a short cute queer story, enjoy!

Gavin Song and The Hunted

Based on this writing prompt: "The leader of a group of vigilantes" [note: I completely ignored the "leader" part of this prompt] "has to reveal who they were before they put on the mask to save their crew. But they know their crew will never see them the same way once they know..." (Writing prompt by @your_local_writer_friend on TikTok/Instagram.) A team of vigilantes known as The Hunted lost a friend of theirs, Gavin Song, a long time ago. But when they get their first lead on him in a decade, their most mysterious team member starts freaking out. Why, and how is he connected to Gavin?

Chapters: 1/1

Words: 9,419

Not beta read, and finished already, but if you have edits let me know! It's basically a first draft since I barely edited it.

A short one-shot vigilante superhero story based on a writing prompt!

Works in Progress:

Level Clear

Doomed time loop, kind of. Not finished yet, but I’m in the editing stage now!

Narrators Inc.

Work in progress (by which I mean I have maybe half a chapter and a vague direction for the rest of the story). Basically, it's a story where the narrator showed up late and is desperately trying to figure out what's happening while attempting to narrate the story

Vegaciel Academy

Magic school murder mystery. Credit to my high school friend group for helping create this story; we were all going to write it together and outlined the characters and plot together. The project ended up being abandoned, but I got everyone else's permission to write it myself because I like the idea so much. It's been a while since I worked on it but I think I finished a chapter? I'm not sure if I'll post the chapters one at a time or wait until I finish the whole thing

The Helmund Labs Incident

A massive, interconnected 4-person backstory for Aegis! To be posted soon.

Other Notable Things:

I'm beta-reading @batfambrainrotbeloved's fic The Drake's Spoiled Brat and I highly recommend it!! It's really good :)

I hope y'all enjoy the stories I have created/am creating! If you want to see the writing prompts that interest me that I might work on in the future, I'll keep reblogging those on my main blog, but I'm mostly planning to keep this blog for stories I'm actually in the process of writing.

[technically-human]

Do you write longer fics?! Just the tidbit of Charles in the Hell Train has my brain wheels turning. I can extrapolate and guess how some of their story would go, but you have such thought put into them. I would hate for you to be like "aw man they totally got this part of the au wrong!" if someone else tried their hand at it, and I would love to read more (and more art). You seem to do both really well

I write... Occasionally. I'm a bit insecure about it, especially in English. I would really love it if someone wrote about the reverse verse, even if their interpretation was different from mine! It would be a lot of fun to read that. I doubt I could make it entertaining enough, though.

I did write The Lamps Are Going Out which is an AU with Edwin as an evil spirit!

And I'm currently working on a couple of fics. Hopefully I'll actually finish them at some point. Here's a fragment of a fic I titled Possibly, maybe

The thing was, Charles had rejected people before.

Back when he was thirteen and alive, the neighborhood kids started taunting him about one of the girls. Amanda, who lived a few streets away from him, had apparently told someone that she fancied Charles, and the rumors spread until Charles himself heard about it. He had never given Amanda much thought, they often crossed paths while going to church, and that was Charles in his best behavior and therefore the most boring –and bored– version of himself. They had probably talked a total of ten times, half of them being a simple greeting. Charles didn't like her back, and resolved to ignore the rumors.

That worked for all of two weeks before Amanda decided to do something about it. She probably had been, Charles knew even back then, waiting for him to be the one to do something, as was the proper way. He wouldn't, though, and whether it was because she knew it or simply that she wasn't willing to wait, she ended up asking him out.

It had been uncomfortable, Charles could hear the giggles from two other girls who had accompanied Amanda and were waiting just a few steps behind her. He wanted to say no, really, because so far he had only considered girls in an abstract, distant sort of way, and again, Amanda wouldn't have been his first choice. But something like anxiety pooled in his stomach, wiping his sweaty palms against his trousers had helped none, and in the end Charles had blurted out an answer that he only fully registered as positive when Amanda squealed happily, her friends running to hug her and jump in place.

Always impulsive, Charles figured that it shouldn't matter. Dating didn't seem all that hard and, after all, he only ever saw her on Sundays. Of course, Amanda's plans were very different. Suddenly, she was everywhere Charles was at, and she always wanted to hold hands or talk or walk together. She would get her bicycle and follow him when he wanted to practice tricks on his skateboard –he was shit at it, and she certainly didn't seem impressed, demanding he paid attention to her after half an hour most of the time, even though she owned a walkman and could probably keep herself entertained– or expect him to walk her home despite the fact that he had to then turn around and walk back a couple streets to get to his place, which they had passed a few minutes prior.

The other neighborhood kids, who had initially mocked him for having a girl be into him, continued to laugh and whistle and shout stuff whenever Amanda took his hand or leaned against his shoulder or called him a cheesy pet name.

They only dated for three weeks, and she was Charles' first kiss.

One morning, as Charles was trying to recover from a cricket game the night before –they had won, and his team was closer to another useless trophy that he could use to decorate his room. His body was sore, but it was a kind of pain he usually welcomed– his dad barged into the room, demanding he do something useful instead of wasting all day in bed. Charles got up and followed his father to the garage, where it was decided that “something useful” meant helping him repair the car.

It was fun. His dad wasn't the most patient person, and he would very quickly resort to yelling if something wasn't understood on the first try, but Charles paid as much attention as he could, asked very little questions and only got scolded a couple of times throughout the day. By the end of it, the car was working properly and, although his body was aching even more than before, it was still a far more pleasant pain than the one his father tended to leave him with.

As was the case every time Charles successfully interacted with his father, he craved to make the day last. Sitting on the porch, his father drinking an ale, Charles taking a few disgusting sips whenever Paul offered the can to him, he searched his brain for a topic of conversation –one that wouldn't ruin the day, that wouldn't end with his body hurting in a different, perhaps more familiar, way– and ended up talking about Amanda. In all honesty, he couldn't quite recall what words he had actually used. Nothing unkind, he liked to think. He had not fancied Amanda, but she was a pleasant enough girl, if somewhat galling. Whatever came out of his mouth, it didn't make his dad angry, but instead caused him to laugh loudly and push Charles in a way that was meant to be friendly, but caused him to involuntarily tense every muscle in his body.

“Look at our Charlie,” his dad had said, smile huge, proud, and Charles had stared, stunned. “Breaking hearts already!”

Charles had smiled back, elated, proud of himself, feeling big and important and good, and like he was finally getting the hang of it, like soon enough his dad would run out of reasons to be angry at him, and everything would be smooth sailing from then on.

Breaking the heart in question was decidedly less fun than being praised for it. Amanda cried when Charles told her he didn't fancy her anymore. He hadn't felt proud of himself or big or good at all, and she stopped saying hello even when they crossed paths at church, where Charles was in his best, most apologetic behavior. His father never did ask how the breakup went, almost like he forgot that whole conversation. Charles was very careful to reject people properly, kindly, after that.

Edwin was a different story. There had been no neighborhood kids to warn Charles of his feelings, but in over thirty years of friendship, there were some moments in which he wondered. Sometimes, Edwin would look at him for a little too long, or smile a little too sweetly, or treat him a little too kindly, and Charles would wonder. He would then push the feeling aside, save his suspicion for more important things, and tell himself that, even if it was true –and that “if” was really carrying that whole sentence– it wouldn't be anyone's problem until someone went and opened their mouth about it. Charles promised himself he wouldn't be that someone. There was no joy that could come from breaking anyone's heart, let alone Edwin's.

Still, he couldn't bring himself to resent his friend when he decided to confirm what Charles only occasionally dared to suspect, and whatever bit of attention he ever afforded his dad, whatever bit of love he held for the most important person in the world, whatever bit of care he put into not breaking any more hearts, he poured into his answer, and willed it to be enough to stop himself from even cracking this precious thing that was offered to him, and that he only ever strived to protect.

Even with something like anxiety in his stomach, and with sweaty palms that he didn't even try to dry on his trousers, Charles reeled in that part of him that always wanted to make people happy, and rejected the person he loved the most in the world, unwilling to be impulsive about this.

[airyravenmaid]

SAGAU: My Style

Back at it again with sharing my personal ideas with the Self-Aware Genshin AU. I don't see myself writing a full-on fanfic about it because I do NOT trust myself with characterizing everybody properly, and some of the ideas I have in mind wouldn't make for a good universal experience for all, if that makes sense. So, instead, I'll just stick to pitching like I'm at a silly ol' business meeting and providing a simple layout. Now, keep in mind, this is going to focus more on my rendition of an Imposter AU specifically, which means I'm also going to do a little nitpicking of some common tropes in it that I find could be done better or even differently. It won't be me saying that anybody who writes them in the traditional sense is bad or doing a bad job, just what I'd do differently. So, without further ado, check out my mish-mushed ideas below the cut:

It all starts with the Creator Themsleves, aka, us. Or, rather, us before we became us. Not making sense? That's fine, but lemme delve into that a little better. Game lore-wise for this AU, there actually was a fully existing, fully breathing Creator that's been around since even before the Archons (but not by too much; Zhongli's still no spring chicken in spite of this). Yes, they did create Teyvat and all that's good in it like the flora, the fauna, and the creatures, and they had a close bond with said Archons not just as people serving, advising, and worshipping their God/ruler, but also in a legitimate friendship (so, no, they're not 100% subservient or gutless ass-kissers-- it's more of an equal dynamic). Maybe one Archon of your choice (within reason) being close enough to the point of being (secret) lovers, if you'd like. Such explains the Archons' deep attachment to the Creator, and their eagerness to see them again after tragedy-- like, say, the Cataclysm that razed Khaenri'ah-- renders them comatose and not to awaken again until present day. Until then, the Creator's body lies safely in sleep like Princess Aurora within their main temple/palace, occasionally visited by their old companions (minus Ei, who's in her hidey-hole until the Inazuma AQ's, but that goes without saying).

But, just before they do wake up, here comes a little (presumably Celestia-sent) POS known as the Imposter, who worms their way into the temple where the Creator lies, steals their garbs and replaces them with normal, less divine attire before sending their body far away apparently never to be seen again and lying on that resting spot acting as the Creator on the verge of waking up. And since no one knows what really happened, it looks like the promised day has come without issues, and the Imposter is welcomed by nearly all back to a throne that never actually belonged to them. As for the actual Creator... they're in good hands, because Teyvat would never mistake another for the All-Parent that breathed life into it and acts to protect their body hidden amidst nature in whatever region they landed in (your choice) until they really do wake up.

And when our in-game body does wake up, our real-life consciousness is transferred into it and overwrites our old, godly memories with our normal ones. Since I can't stand isekais that require us dying an early death IRL (like, at all, actually), we're either magically transported to Teyvat the old-fashioned magic way, or part of our consciousness goes into our in-universe body and leaves our physical forms in reality alone, thereby creating two versions of us going around two separate worlds. For better wording, that is, but that's the gist of it. Either way, we're the real deal Creator, but one without our old memories (apart from short visions we get of our old divine life that come up every now and again) as far as everyone else in Teyvat is concerned. They're not totally wrong, anyway. I was thinking this could be justified to everyone by our "past self" saying pre-slumber that they will reawaken without the knowledge of this world (aka, the Genshin one), but it will still very much be them/us.

By the way, when we stumble into the main town or city of whatever region we wound up in, the locals don't just immediately attack us for looking like the Imposter. While sometimes, I do enjoy kicking back and enjoying pure angst, I otherwise found that aspect of Villain/Imposter!SAGAU to be, comment dit-on... absurd, especially with nobody in Mondstadt (outside of that one nun not buying it and simply scolding him) giving two honks about Venti despite him looking like (being) Barbatos, and nobody in Liyue even noticing the resemblance between Zhongli and Rex Lapis/Morax. And given how much those nations revere their god, the argument of us being a higher deity cannot be made. So, instead, at absolute worst, people are just really unnerved by the uncanny resemblance we have to the Creator, but otherwise don't get alarmed... until the Imposter catches wind of us and changes that. The reason people start attacking us at all is because the Imposter weaves a forewarning of the Creator's antithesis equal to them in power known as the "Destroyer" will descend on Teyvat, attempt to steal the throne using the Creator's face, and do worse to the world than the Abyss Order ever could try to if not stopped. And, this may sound like something they just made up to get us killed, but in a way... it's true, only issue is that the acolytes + citizens have the wrong idea of who's who, of course. Plus, the actual, all-powerful Creator, if pushed too far by say... an incredibly lengthy and traumatic manhunt after being mistaken for the Destroyer, is capable of tearing the world limb from limb, because those who create can as easily destroy, but those who destroy can never create.

Speaking of "all-powerful"... why are we always completely powerless in these SAGAU works apart from crying and/or getting really angry (which ARE realistic and valid reactions to the shit we're going through, but it's not mutually exclusive to getting cool abilities)? Because we're not actually from Teyvat? Even Aether and Lumine have the power to wield the elements despite coming from somewhere else, and for us to not get that same honor is frankly dull as dishwater. That's a lot of missed potential to dip into the fantasy aspect of a fantasy game like Genshin Impact. It's here I'd like to take some inspiration from a show I've enjoyed for years known as none other than "Avatar: The Last Airbender". Not to mention, the term "avatar" generally refers to a "divine incarnation in human form", hello??? Ahem! In other words, instead of being completely incapable of defending ourselves, we-- being the almighty Creator-- are able to wield all seven elements at once, but we have to gradually learn how to effectively use and master them. We do start with one element (any of your choice), then work our way up in order of the loading screen. IE: say your element is Cryo, you'd have to go Geo -> Pyro -> Hydro -> Anemo -> Electro -> Dendro. Such was the same in our past life, but we had the Archons to teach us and help us master those abilities through time.

Which means now, we need other people to help us do it again in our new "incarnation", and that's in the form of 5-star Vision holders since they fit the bill of "master" a bit better, being the rarer, stronger characters and junk. Of course, this is likely with discretion, because some might not be wise to learn from (such as Klee, funny as that'd be). I'm also discounting learning from the Archons because not only has our time with them from the previous life passed, but I don't find it fair to learn from a powerful god of that element, even if we're a god ourselves. It's more balanced learning from someone beneath that level (so, yes, an adeptus would still qualify). Also, important note here: not every single playable character is going to try and kill us for the Creator-Destroyer thing. NPCs are one thing because, let's be real, they're sheep, but it isn't realistic or in-character for everybody playable to want us dead. While a fair chunk would probably be on board for the sake of not letting the world blow to smithereens (and not because, you know, Same Face Syndrome, because that's completely insane), some might not outright believe the alleged prophecy for one reason or another, such as not being fond/trusting enough of the apparent "Creator" to just listen to them right off the bat, or getting to already find out who the real Creator is and knowing we're not the enemy. Whatever the reason is, we're going to have allies, including ones that join us in our quest to defeat the Imposter and take back the throne to restore balance to Teyvat. This can also include those who initially sided with the Imposter, but for one reason or another such as seeing our gold blood, they have a change of heart and tag along for the ride. For us to just go about Teyvat on the lam with nobody having our back is just... depressing, and not even in the fun way, either. I understand this faction of SAGAU tends to be purely angst-based, but come on, it doesn't have to all be a total bummer all the time. There's no rule that says we can't go through the angsty, heartwrenching stuff with traveling companions to call our own there for us through it all.

Now, of course, whoever those traveling companions are is really up to you because not all of us are gonna wanna tag up with and learn from the same bitches as the next guy. So, it's anybody's game with anybody's reasoning and circumstances (such as which region we wake up in, who our first companion(s) would be there, then which region we move onto, and even what element we have to learn next). Also, fitting the max. number of characters you can have on one team, it'd just be four actively traveling alongside us through Teyvat with other allies remaining where they are, whether they helped us master an element or not. But, no matter anybody's personal tastes and choices, I really wish there was more of a thrilling "fantastical group adventure" kind of element to this genre of SAGAU, because the potential is there, just-- seldom reached, from what I've seen, personally. I'd be more than happy adding onto this with anything I might have missed, but that's basically the gist of my view of this AU.

[viridian-house]

Do you have any favorite naruto fics you’d recommend? Any pairing, complete or not, on-hiatus, gen, oneshots, anything is fine lol

I was legitimately just pruning my bookmarks the other day!! thank you so much for asking.

I don't read too much fanfic these days, and I'm picky when I do--only about grammar/punctuation and immersion though. I ship a LOT of stuff (I guess The Youth would call me a proshipper) and although I never read darkfic, I don't shy away from weirder kinks and unhealthy relationship stuff.

categorizing by pairing, if applicable. some of them are smutty, and please note that the first 3 come from FFN which doesn't have a tagging system, but there is some SA CW I'll give in advance.

KAKASAKU | my first OTP! formative fics that totally reshaped my understanding of what fanfiction could be, and how well-written chemistry can make it or break it

HOUSE OF CROWS is the quintessential kakasaku fanfic. it was written during shippuden and so is canon divergent because of that, but also tells a comprehensive story of its own right that is intriguing and well planned. excellent characterization and world building. leaves me gutted in the best way on my yearly reread.

DUTY BEFORE HONOR is another silvershine classic. I don't reread is as often as House of Crows but they are just about equal in quality. again, the chemistry between them is off the charts, and the world feels so alive.

WILL OF FIRE for me is up there with House of Crows in being essential kakasaku reading. cynchick is a multisaku champion and a wonderful storyteller. the stakes in this one are stressful, the romance tense and believable, and we once again get lovely world building and great chemistry.

ITAKISA | a pairing near and dear to me, because men who do everything wrong are so deeply relatable. they both know they don't deserve anything good ever again but they found each other!!!! ARE YOU GUYS SEEING THIS--

A SHARK HIDDEN INN THE LEAVES doesn't have my favorite version of Kisame, but he's plenty close enough. it's a lengthy oneshot that got me into certain *ahem* kinks. it is a very fun and wild fic that is entirely self-aware of how absurd it's being, and manages to have nothing but sincerity at the same time (and I highly recommend the author's other stories as well)

AN ORCHESTRA PLAYING ON, INSANE is a modern AU (extremely rare in my bookmarks) that absolutely tore my heart out. god is it SO much to ask for these losers to be happy?! yes, it is, and I love every moment of it

MADAMITO | a rarepair I am SUCH a sucker for that has some of the most talented authors writing for it. lots of them have ot3 elements between them and hashirama, often angsty, but stuff like that is part of the appeal for me, lol

A HANDFUL OF SKY is an unfinished fic that I genuinely think about like once a week. if it ever updates then I will be over the moon. technically hashimadamito but it hadn't quite gotten there yet

LIKE ALTARS is just such a beautiful piece of writing, mostly on madara. it is everything, that is all

BLOOD AND RIVER WATER is more mito-centric but has one of my favorite madaras of all time

YOURS ARE RATTLED BONES is another short, mito-centric but gut-wrenching piece featuring the opposite type of madara from the last one

OTHER | character-centric stuff that isn't necessarily shippy but also doesn't have a very "gen" vibe either?

A SERPENT IN THE RICE is a little series about orochimaru that makes me feel so so so many things. highly recommended

HERETIC is such a love letter to kushina, and kurama too. cannot stress enough how much I adore this one

there's a few others that I probably won't link on tumblr, mostly unhealthy and/or "problematic" smut hhfhdj but maybe I'll make a public rec list on ao3 for these different categories and stuff like that.

but yeah that's pretty much it!!! I know it's not a huge list with a lot of variety but it's what I've enjoyed over the last 15+ years in the naruto fandom.

[fabbyf1]

Hi!

I’m not sure of this is how to go about this correctly.

I’m not sure what your position is on others drawing inspiration/directly from your incredible fan fiction writing but, on Ao3 there is a fic called ❤️lestappen- One shorts💙 by lestapeeen. The most recent chapter (14) is very similar to the monza chapter of long live(twwct) specifically the piggy back and proposal promise. some of the dialogue is exactly the same.

I figured you should know. If it’s a cool with you or if you knew already, sorry to be a bother.

DISCLAIMER: This post, by no means, is asking for ANYBODY to send this author mentioned (and tagged) below hate. On anon or main. I have been pretty damn clear with my feelings on the matter below. They know what they've done, and I won't stand for it. Nobody needs to make this worse by sending them death threats. With that out of the way, let's deep dive, shall we?

YOU KNOW WHAT?

First off, god bless you, bestie. God BLESS you. I want to smooch you on your incredibly wonderful forehead. Thank you so much for bringing this to my attention. I cannot be everywhere at once and cannot possibly read every fanfic posted to AO3, but it's not fucking cool for people to straight-up plagiarize my shit.

Secondly, I'd like to ask that if ANY of my followers come across something that looks very suspiciously similar to my fics, please let me know. You can for sure send it on anon, or send me a dm.

Now, with that being said, I clicked on this fucking fic not knowing what to think. I went into it with a pretty open mind, knowing that there are quite a few authors currently posting fics that are verrrrrrrrrrry similar to my writing style. I've gotten pretty close to calling a few of these authors out but haven't for a few reasons.

Fanfics based on the same ship, in the same canon setting, are always going to be... let's use the word "similar" here. The plot can only change so much when you're following canon events, you know? I don’t write AUs, so I’m only going off canon-inspired fics. My fics generally follow along with canon timelines and therefore, other author’s fics that follow the same timeline are going to be... similar. I get that and accept that.

Characterizations are bound to be... well, fuck it, let's use that word "similar" again. I'm gonna be pretty forgiving when someone's Max is damn near the same as my Max because one: I'm a good and forgiving person, and two: I think my characters (while totally fucking fictional) are very life-like to the real person. So, with that in mind, when I read a fic with characterizations similar to mine... I will usually give somebody grace... and accept that maybe, just possibly, they see Max Verstappen (the person) the same way I do (fictionally) and it’s a big old coincidence that our fics read so similar. You know? Does that make sense?

But with all that being said, I’m not a fucking idiot. 

And honestly? I give more grace than I should on this goddamn website. (lmfao, respectfully.) This is sadly not the first time that somebody has very much written in my likeness, and I know it won't be the last. But this is definitely the boldest version of plagiarism I've seen. I haven’t clicked on any chapter except for 14, and I heavily skimmed the first part, but let’s take a little deep dive into some of the highlights. Because I will show the receipts, bestie.

from their story:

from long live:

..... right, let's move on.

from their story:

from long live:

okay................. sure

from their story:

from long live:

If you're going to plagiarize my shit... you could at least put it in a different font, so to speak. "Hey, can I copy your homework?” “Sure, but change it up a bit.” 

Girlie pop, you stopped even trying to change it the fuck up. 

Let me be clear: I do not authorize anybody to translate, re-post or distribute my work without my written consent. This is in a disclaimer (that I will post below) in every single one of my fics. Taking MY dialogue is NOT okay. 

Direct quote from the beginning note of Long Live:  DISCLAIMER #4: This is 100% fictional, and I do not own any person, team, or sponsor referenced in this story. I mean no offense to any person(s) mentioned and characterized in this story. I am not affiliated with any part of Formula 1 or its subsections. Please do not translate, re-post, or distribute my work without my written consent. I will cry.

To sum up, writing is not easy, and it takes time and effort. Time away from my friends, my girlfriend, my family. Time away from my job and my other hobbies. Long Live is 76 thousand words and took me countless hours to write.

To have somebody so blatantly and disrespectfully post MY SHIT as their own and not even try to give me credit? To not write a note that said, “Heyyyyy go read long live, which I [clearly] really enjoyed!” or even a “Some of this dialogue was inspired by @fabbyf1” or even just a “lmfao some of this i didn’t write but the rest i did” really pisses me off.

Why did it ever have to come to this?

I am SO disappointed right now.

Happy fucking Friday, I guess.

For full transparency, here is the link to their fic: https://archiveofourown.org/works/55255699 and here is the link to their tumblr: @l-estappen

Here is the link to MY fic, which was posted on April 2nd, 2023, and written in Google Docs with revision history about a month before that. I have receipts out the fucking ass, my dear. https://archiveofourown.org/works/46190509/chapters/116284915

Be well.

[zombieheroine]

Thoughts on MHA/BnHA 426????

Shocked, devastated, still in mourning. I will never be okay again, something in me has been altered, there's a strangling feeling in my throat but all I can do is stare into emptiness.

For real, I read it and was Very Much Not Okay for several days.

More under the spoilers cut. Just remember, you asked.

OKAY SO. I am both absolutely devastated but also very fulfilled with how the Todoroki family saga is wrapping itself up. It think this is one of the strongest aspects of the entire Boku no Hero Academia story, and I am very happy with how daring its conclusion is.

Like so many, I started out hating/not caring about Endeavour at all, but as the story dwelved more deeply into the whole mess that is his family and he as a character started evolving, I grew to care a lot. His character embodies a lot of deep dark fears that I have, like what if you've been wrong all along, and you're actually selfish and horrible and all you do is for nothing yet you hurt everyone you love for it. And then one day your best days are behind you, you're growing old, and all you have is a handful of ashes, because you destroyed everything that mattered in pursuit of nothing at all.

Then again, basically since the season 4 of the anime I've been lowkey worried that Horikoshi would just take a shortcut with the Todoroki family and be like "no worries, dad gave flowers once and shows up once a week from now on, it's all fine, the nuclear family unit will be all good now!"

But that's not how the manga went, and I've been looking forward to this absolute gut punch for a long time. I've actually rooted for pretty much everything this chapter gave us.

Because it's true that there are unforgivable things. Sometimes you can't fix what you've broken, but that doesn't mean you shouldn't try.

I think the story has well and truly driven in that there are consequences to your action and choices, and that this is what parenting is: you give it your all no matter what, and then your kids make their own choices. They owe you nothing, while you owe them everything.

To me it makes sense that Shoto is the closest to Enji: he got the most attention and "care", no matter how misguided and abusive it was. He's also still young enough and has enough in common with his father to actually have room for better things, while he has also built his own separate support network that he actually depends on and that will nurture him to become different and better than where he came from. He leaves while shouting reassurances to his mom and dad, so settling in a very normal and balanced dynamic with them.

It's the older Todoroki siblings who represent different outcomes and underline other points. Toya represents the absolute worst case scenario that might come from an abusive family dynamic: a total rejection, vengeful and violent. Everything went wrong with him, and then he was groomed to become the absolute worst version that he could possibly be. For Toya vs Enji, I wondered if one would kill the other and which would be worse. I theorized that Horikoshi wouldn't make Enji kill Toya and that the most likely end would be that Enji (more or less) lets Toya kill him instead. But I hate the "redemption through death" trope, so I've had an AU idea ready where Toya ends up bed-ridden with his injuries, and Enji and Rei care for him despite how it looks to the public.

Now that Toya is in hospice care, I've gotten that but uhhhh worse, thanks for that Horikoshi-sensei, I'm not okay??? This probably hits so hard because I've been through that, having a family member in hospice care. Yes, it's just a part of life, but that's what makes it hurt so bad. Hurts so much more than any grand battle with hard moral choices could, because this feels so real. From a writing perspective, it's great, but just the thought of a hospice ward is enough to make me want to cry for real. So.

I had my Toya feels way back when the battle happened. It makes me so sad to think that what he really wanted all along was very simple, but just couldn't grab it, and then everything went to hell and it's not even his fault. Another unfulfilled person, very much like his father, whether he likes it or not.

Moving on, for Fuyumi I hope she gets distance and a better relationship with her mom and her brothers on one-on-one basis. She's been that "eldest daughter" who's tried to fix everything on her own, so I'm glad it looks like she's getting a fresh start and isn't fretting over anyone.

I'm especially happy that Natsuo decided to cut ties with Enji. That's been brought up as a possibility in the story before when the Todoroki family was having their weekly dinners, but I honestly didn't think Horikoshi would go through with it: usually in stories like this, if a parent tries to make amends, they succeed and the children forgive them. I think this is really strong writing, that not only the possibility of not being forgiven was brought up, but it's also carried through. Natsuo was neglected and ignored, he has basically no relationship with his father, and he doesn't want to build one. He doesn't care that Enji regrets his action, and he doesn't want to put time and energy into what he sees as only a bad thing in his life. He's an independent adult with a life of his own, and he chooses to walk away and cut ties for good. Good for him, especially since his choice would have been the best case scenario for Toya: live your own life and leave the past behind.

Among the siblings, I love that they come together to accept each other, especially Toya. They don't have much time, not that even all the time in the world was going to fix what's been broken, but they take what little they have and make the most of it. It's not enough and it doesn't make everything okay, but considering the other - and much easier - option would be to just walk away, to cut ties looking good and righteous to the public while doing so, it's the best they can do. They choose to embrace their lost brother until he passes, to accept someone who's essentially a massmurdering terrorist, because to them he's family.

As for Endeavor, his retirement makes me sad. It's like a final nail to the coffin: he wasn't cut out to be a hero and he never achieved what he wanted the most in life. But then again, I do like that in the context of the larger story, it cuts to the point of what true heroics are. It's not about strength, power rankings, image, or flashy costumes. It's about accepting responsibility, doing the right thing especially when it's hard and unpopular, and serving others. His character was early on described as 'a hero who doesn't look like a hero', and him giving up the name and the costume signifies this bigger point of the story, that heroes shouldn't be idols in capes on a pedestal, and that ordinary people shouldn't just expect someone else to come and solve their problems for them. The end point of his character is to accept that doing the heroic thing is thankless, hard work out of the spotlight.

But it's not all bleakness, because there are still people there for him. I really like this sort of a nuanced ending, where some things work out and others don't. It feels very real and thus makes me feel real feelings: it's not all suffering but not all sunshine and roses either. It's just life, difficult and uncertain.

And yes, all my endhawks feels too. A little flicker of light. I do think they are a great match and they met each other at a perfect moment in their lives. They wouldn't have worked out before, but now they have good things to give each other and empty space in their lives to build something new. Interesting that Enji is retiring and Hawks is now quirkless, they will both have to be good people in more conventional ways (and paralleling Midoriya and One For All; fascinating).

'Endhawks' more like endgame, heh.

[drippingmoon]

Merry new year to everyone, again! 🥳💞🥂

I know it wasn’t an event this year, but writing a yearly wrap-up is really therapeutic, you know? So I decided to continue the tradition, and if anyone wants to join me, absolutely view this as an open invitation^^ Introduction is over, and now let’s see what 2023 looked like:

(spoilers: I adored it. I'm also probably going to make this my fixed post, in case anyone ever wants to catch up with me. And also because my second baby, AoS, is growing, and it doesn't have an intro, but I can't leave it out.)

Stats

Aquiver, Aglow: 181k (draft 4) + 195k (draft 5) + hmm, draft 6 is an outlier, because I didn’t rewrite from scratch, so I’m unsure of the written word count. I didn’t change much from draft 5, so I’d say an extra 15-20k. Total word count: 376k+

Remains of a Night: 120k 

Aberration of Sunlight: 134k

This was definitely my most productive year to date. And I got so hungry: the more I wrote, the more I just wanted to keep writing, and honestly? I’m proudest of myself for literally carving writing time whenever I got a spot into my schedule. Mostly it was from 8pm-11pm, but I had a mad run where my only free window was from 1am till I literally felt I was dying… I’ll talk about that separately🤣🤣👌

Though, I'm seriously understating it.

Like a lot of other people, I would have all these hours when I was younger when I didn't have anything to do, yet I'd still find some excuse not to write. "I'm waiting for the right time." "I'm anxious I'm not going to get it right." "Tomorrow! Tomorrow I can start right from the morning, and I'll have more time to write, yeah?" or "I'm too tired now, it's late..." and so the snowball rolled down and downhill and I found every reason under the sun not to write, now that I think about it. Sigh. So much time wasted. But I can't regret it either, because I needed those baby steps at that time.

And now! Now I do what I thought I'd never learn to: I prioritize, and I actually organize my daily stuff so it's not so impossible anymore to have a little bit of writing time. I don't take it for granted either. It feels like such character growth for me, I'm immensely proud of it.

And for the record? This year was a huge improvement over yesteryear mentally, too. It turns out, what I needed to get over my word count anxiety… was to be faced with people who literally didn’t give a fuck about it, and just cared about the story. One of the most unexpected things beta stage managed to do to me… was to quench all my anxieties. It’s as simple as that. I read and enjoy very long books. People also do that. So, I’m very happy to say I’m no longer in a tizzy about ‘quiv. It might kill my chances for trad publishing, it might not. I’ll be happy come what may.

Because it’s so simple how working on ‘quiv or thinking about it makes me joyous, and now I can just enjoy that freely. I will miss writing this story so much. I really will. But at least I’ll have it forever to reread, and I hope this thought brings comfort to everyone who also has problems letting go, like it does to me.

Let’s break it down a little, shall we?🤩

Aquiver, Aglow◇◇◇

My little star of the hour. How fond I am of it.

Like you could glean from above, ‘quiv went through three drafts this year. More specifically: in the first part of the year, practically almost as soon as February arrived. I knew it was getting closer to the final version, and gave me the push to finish all three back to back. I couldn’t justify anymore the bazillion AUs I do with rewrites (basically, WHAT IFs from events, WHAT IF it went this different way, WHAT IF Tyrone actually said this here… and so on and so forth. I wanted to test out as many pathways as possible, and did I exhaust every one of them in existence? Definitely not. I don’t think that can happen, you just keep getting new ideas. On and on. What happened, instead, is that these couple different pathways, at some point, cemented themselves as canon in my mind. I didn’t want to tease myself with alternatives anymore, and that’s when I knew they would be it. Some bits from the first draft, some from the third, some from the second. Some were even draft 6 originals!

It’s a bit of a weird process. I definitely didn’t need to reach draft 3, and meet Mezusa, because I could’ve feasibly made it work with just Yles in the story. It still would’ve made sense, though in a different way. But if I hadn’t… I might’ve missed one of the best characters I’ll ever probably have created, and the story (and Yles) is much stronger for her, if you ask me. 

For that matter, yes, full rewrites every single draft might take a lot of time and effort, but honestly I don’t think I’d ever change my writing process (save for the moments of frustration when I think I will lol) because of the sheer satisfaction of it. Whoever said so long never to settle on the first version, I owe you a beer and probably some curses as well lmao, but very lovingly. You shaped my writing life.

I don’t have much else to share about ‘quiv, other than it’s off with my beta readers my beloved, and maybe a tentative promise that, if anyone wants, you’ll be able to read this precious ball of hope of mine relatively soon. This story is so gentle to me. And as much as I loved to write and work on it, I dearly hope that whoever decides to give it a go, is treated just the same. That’s the only wish I have.

I also don’t know if I’ll go trad or self-published. Instincts say trad, because I fuckin’ suck at marketing (fact), and I know I’d grow resentful if I’d have to put so many hours into advertising when I know I could instead… write. I’m a writer. That’s the only thing I know how to do. Trad, however, might not be as kind on a ~200k as life’s been, so I might not have a choice. If it comes down to that… I’ll just treat it as I do everything. I don't love this story any less if I just write, publish without a fuss, hope that maybe, just maybe, a reader or two will stumble upon the story and we could talk. Maybe we can have the fun of our lives, create some genuine connection. I know that’s applies to a lot of writers. I hope we can accomplish it.

And so, I’ll finish this section of the wrap-up with a kiss to my ‘quiv, for all the warmth it’s ever brought me. It’s come so far, I know it can live distinct from me from now on. It brings me great comfort. And I look forward to the times I’ll reread it, and we can relive our best experiences together. Never thought I’d get to this point. Thank you, ‘quiv.

Remains of a Night♤♤♤

Mwhahaha! And because ‘quiv took all the pressure, this left AoS to be an extremely fun and spirited experience. Literally the chillest I’ve ever been writing. In many ways, it’s more my thing than I expected ‘quiv to be: I get to murder characters left and right, it’s more plot-heavy and banking on the tension created by a creature that horrifies the characters down to their marrow, but still the only way to defeat it is to know it better, which, uh, might have unpleasant consequences for them. It’s got chase and stealth scenes, and it always shoots me with adrenaline to think about them. In short, exactly my jam.

It’s not a new book, nope. You knew it before as Aberration of Sunlight, but from the get-go I felt it would be bigger than ‘quiv. Very fortunately for me, I had a place where to break it, and behold: there’s RoaN (book 1), and AoS (book 2). There might be a third book, which I dearly hope not because titling sucks, but it depends on the Sycamine arc. More on that in AoS.

One last thing to note, before we delve into the story (hoo-ray for earlier drafts, because I can talk more frankly about them). This is the culprit of my 1am writing adventures!!😫❤ My schedule became too packed, then NaNo came round and I couldn’t pass up the opportunity to honor how AoS began, because it was last year’s NaNo, aaand I’m happy to say I won NaNo, somehow, with 56k down before I died. At that time, I only had one section left to write (from both books), otherwise, hahahaha, yeah, it wouldn’t have flown. Still, most of draft 2 I’d written in September-October, with my fairy lights, late nights, and cups of hot cocoa, exactly like how life should be<3

Alright. We’re going through them chapter-by-chapter again, exactly because I love seeing the titles so much:

ACT 1

Cracked Visor, Scorpion Grass

I did it! I did! Twas another shower thought I managed to get down in time. Bare broken sentences, but they did the impossible, and arranged this chapter into a structure I adore to bits and won't ever change. (And 'quiv's naughty voice left me alone for once and I could write it properly!) While I don't think I'll ever be happy with a first chapter (not as a concept, but the writing — part of me will always wish that the reader just had all the information already lol), this one is in the right place.

It pays its respects to the story of the broken helmet at the foot of a spaceship, and how it reconnects Madigan with all the people who'd suffered from being tethered to the planets when they yearned to fly, but the Beast punished them cruelly for it. It makes him feel phantoms of their efforts. The tone is exactly what I needed this story to start from: melancholy and numbly hopeless, against the backdrop of the Beasts's echoed cries.

Rain Through the Universe

Unlike 'quiv, because RoaN and AoS are way more plot-heavy, it's not as easy to change things willy-nilly (whereas 'quiv was all about character bonds and dynamics). As such, it's very similar to draft 1. Because of that, I'll frankendraft next (select and combine drafts 1 and 2, rewrite to connect them) and afterwards I'll try something I've always wanted to. (Scrivener keeps hinting at it!) I'm gonna split the chapters into scenes, and focus on those individually and how I can just rewrite them and set their purpose in stone<3 I'm excited!

As for the chapter itself, gods, I love the atmosphere. Just the wreckage of a sundered ship, and Madigan’s sudden madman appearance making a lasting impression on Spica, because how could it not. They no longer answer distress calls in that age, it just means more dead bodies. In fact, they're forbidden to. Madigan instead brings him what he himself lacks: hope. And a lot of crawling around while dreading the Beast's lambent eye opening, and oh my, the moments are really flying by😈👏 extreme fun for me as the writer.

Aberration of Light

If you remember, the books follow two timelines, which will connect at some point. The first and main one is Madigan and Spica’s story. The other is Holloway’s, in the distant past of that universe, and who’s been dubbed the most selfish man in existence. That’s important, because of how the Beast came to be. But that becomes important later. For now, a weird-ass new recruit has joined the ship, and the witchy crew will very soon start making bets if she’s the Beast in human flesh, which really wouldn’t bode well for their future.

Night Falls On Their Reflection

Draft 2 became Spica’s draft. It was high time. He didn't exist in the original idea beyond chapter 2, but he refused to die with his story untold. And now he's one of the most independent thinkers I've ever written. Now he's Madigan's son (yes, even at 25), best friend, back-to-back partner all in one, and I could watch the trust and mutual respect between these two forever. To be sure: Madigan comes up with the dumbass plans, and Spica's only too happy to follow him through everything (it is good fun.)

He's repaying the incredible kindness Madigan's shown him when answering his distress call, after all.

But it goes a bit further than that, doesn't it? Madigan is used to watching over myriad people. He's the Superintendent of his planet, and while he genuinely loves people, kindness is his default. It doesn't go further than that for him. He doesn't necessarily think people need, much less desire his presence there beyond Madigan extending help, and most of the time, he's content with that. Kindness does make him happy. And it should be the same with Spica now, shouldn't it? He's kind, but he's not Spica's family, nor ever will be. Yet he immediately feels a connection with the boy, that has nothing to do with bonding over escaping-a-cosmic-disaster. And so does Spica.

This is the moment when Madigan starts feeling guilty, for stepping where he should not. But here's the beauty of Spica's character: he's nothing if not dead sure of his own feelings, and what he sees with his eyes. It's okay if Madigan keeps unexpectedly taking steps back. For very long, there'd been nobody to support Spica's beliefs. So he does the same, as when he followed his heart to go into dead space: he believes in himself and Madigan, and that their paths aren't meant to diverge. They mean too much to each other for that to ever happen.

(In short, and legend says you can still hear me screeching about these two ten thousand years later, I love these two so much, and especially the parallels between Spica going alone into outer space and loving Madigan.)

(And, okay, obviously all these developments don't happen in a single chapter, but I couldn't stop gushing🤭🥰.)

Who Puts These Tombs in Ice

Overall, I think draft 2’s Luitgart performed worse than draft 1. Mainly it's the setting I want to revert (still an icy, sempiternally dark hell, but with different ice constructions) because some of the beats are a huge improvement, and again, I gotta combine the two. Otherwise, I’m still as obsessed about the Luitgart arc as I’ve ever been, and huge thanks to it for being so strong it could function as an ending of its own, allowing me to split the book.

Gettin’ into spoilery territory, but I have to un-kill Madigan so many times it leaves me in hysterics. That was what I was supposed to fix this draft. It got worse. Considerably.

(One constant: the chapter being a love letter to Madigan, and how his first answer will always be to help the other, no matter if they deserve it or not<3 and finally, finally, he gets acknowledged for it, and the favor returned.)

ACT 2

Lemon-Dotted Days + Remnant

Two Holloway chapters! I’m actually massively pleased with how they’ve turned out. Last year, I said the main issue was that I had an outline, and that never works for me. So I did what I do best and rewrote everything from scratch, and the result is both uncanny and… unexpected.

Unexpected, because I never in my life thought Holloway’s voice would make me laugh so much. He’s supposed to be unsympathetic, but then you get his interactions with Saintlark (the new crewmate, possibly Beast) where they’re contemplating the harvest of a nebula, and he’s harshly critical of it, which gives Saintlark hope… only to go deadpan One Moment Later: if they’d used the nebula to prolong their lives instead of bolstering the war, they wouldn’t have died like clown idiots. 

And, they could’ve maybe stolen immortality from the nebula. They would've had to share it with him, of course. Or he would've murdered them to get it.

That, my guys, is his personality in a nutshell.

I have a lot of feelings on Holloway now, and most involve me huffing and slapping my forehead while groaning, but oh my gods. Was it ever so fun. And wait, wait, wait. Since I'm talking of humor (apparently a lot of comedy fit into this horror lmfao) I have to show you guys the following section🤣🤣👏:

Corpse Snow

The drifters are set howling on the ice. They share glances, five separate vehicles nodding at each other. Madigan revs up the engine, splitting the air with a jet of steam and vibration.

The last of the marines are climbing into the box. A figure flashes past Madigan’s drifter — and he leans over, teeth grinding because of his ribs, and he does his very best to grab someone by the back of their suit and pull. Workout days were never his strength, though. He only succeeds in stopping them in the frost smoke.

It’s Spica dangling from his hand, expressionless.

Lieutenant Hahn instantly seizes on the situation. He throws Madigan a long, withering look. “Whatcha doing, Boss?” he asks softly, about to unhinge his jaw again.

Madigan nudges Spica into the drifter. “Picking up your boy.”

Spica gets the hint and deposits himself into the front seat, glancing from his father to his Superintendent. He seems to give up on whatever’s going on, and makes himself cozy in the frosty spot. And Madigan, of course, pretends not to notice Hahn’s drifter sliding closer.

“And you didn’t consider I might want to have my son with me?”

Madigan looks up and sighs. “Lieutenant, dear Lieutenant,” he starts pleadingly. “Why won’t you show some leniency to a poor, wounded man?”

Hahn’s drifter stops, summoning a breeze across the icy floor that gently rocks the other vehicle. His breathing distorts the comms with static. “And what exactly is my son right now?”

“My trusty navigator,” Madigan answers easily.

“Sir’s emotional walking stick?” Spica pipes in at the same time.

They both look over. Spica’s quietly turned to the navigation, as serene as daylight, seemingly oblivious to how Madigan's expression changes, lightning-fast. He quickly hides it under the guise of a polite mask, as the marines stir and turn their attention on them. They’re snickering.

Lieutenant Hahn throws up his hands, giving up on everything.

This is also the first 30k chapter I’ve ever written. It's everything I've ever wanted to do with ice.

Heart of the Void

The end of the book. Originally, it was the ending section to Corpse Snow, but since it already got so ungodly long, I chipped off that bit and I have to say I’m very happy with how it works as an epilogue! So it ends the frosty, weary journey, and I can’t see the two books as separate yet, but here we bid goodbye to the first.

Aberration of Sunlight♧♧♧

I did the unthinkable and created a fifth arc. This might not seem like much to you, but I was screaming bloody murder you guys😭😭😭. Sigh. It’s so sigh. For so long, AoS consisted of four clear-cut acts, but it was necessary. With the introduction of Sycamine, and making it two books, it was just needed. It’s still one of the worst things I’ve ever done because I was used to four😃💔

(The chapters continue from where RoaN left off – from chapter 10, to 21.)

ACT 3

Retro Spectrum

Sycamine, oh Sycamine. Definitely the break I needed before Days in Darkness. It made for a really neat beginning. It’s calmer, focusing on the knowledge they have on the Beast. It’s also a reflection on Procyon (their main star) and the story of the two straggler dog constellations, and what they'd been running away from. I liked the direction it took. It veered away from the Beast for a bit, so the tension kept expanding in the background. And when it returns, well... maybe they shouldn't have been so eager to see it again🤭.

It suffers from the same syndrome as draft 1’s first chapter… it’s there in the vicinity of the idea, but too much to the left. Not bad for a first attempt. The setting annoys me – I really don't enjoy writing cities, and AoS didn't change that. So, for our next try, I was thinking... maybe we don't need to be on the planet, but up close and veeery personal with it. It's a secret❤.

And, oh gods. I put a moustache-twirling villain in this. And then I couldn’t stop myself from naming some sucker Sweetman Calories. I don’t know what happened to me during those days, but I’m crying🤣🤣🤣.

Toast to the Light

Holloway and Saintlark’s story is slowly coming to an end. Unexpectedly bleaker than draft 1, yet it feels much more sincere. Holloway has a way of saying everything Saintlark needs to hear. No surprise. They did that to themselves.

Dissonant Recognition

Ahhhh, the Madigan-is-slowly-losing-his-grip-on-reality chapter, or maybe he should really stop staring into the suns. One of my favorites<3 Also because it features Moren (!!!) who has a blast staying in the grey morality area, because she doesn’t know if her actions could ever matter, or if she could change anything. Does she just exist? Is she a player or just pawn? Who knows. Besides that, she gets along great with Spica. They form such a teasing duo, the level of mutual respect they felt for each other on sight was a delight to write. My favorite ally of theirs, even if her destiny lies elsewhere.

Night Beneath the Elevator

Best title hands down, dethroning Solgesis. I’m going batshit crazy about the visuals, it's exactly my thing. This half-light slanted over an elevator waiting in a rundown basement to be boarded. And there's something underneath it, and always has been. Something insidiously creeping up and waving its tendril fingers at you as you're just waiting for the fucking thing to ascend. Immaculate, guys, I'm telling you, and I'm cursing my hands because I can't make a wallpaper of this. I want to eat that atmosphere.

Time-sensitive missions, y'all.

And why the heck did nobody inform me I was going to add Command as an actual character and have them talk with Madigan?! That entire convo, made up entirely on the spot but somehow with a direction, made me realize what an idiot I’d been for not doing it sooner. They mean so much to Madigan, after all.

(And Mariya. So much Mariya in these chapters.)

ACT 4

Loop System

Like Who Puts These Tombs in Ice, draft 1 might’ve done it better. Not Spica and Madigan, though, because of the sheer development Spica’s been through and the dynamic he’s managed to form with the crew. It's different from Madigan’s, but similar enough that it’s got Hahn commenting lightly: [Spica’s] picked up quite a few habits from Madigan, hasn’t he? Almost as if they’ve gotten very very close, huh? How about Madigan tell him more?

(I adore writing Hahn.)

Outreach

Another Holloway chapter. Doesn’t have the punch of the kids subplot from draft 1, but this just makes it worse for Saintlark personally, because, this time, the consequences are on her.

Days in Darkness

I knew the moment I first got the idea this would be my favorite chapter. Well, it finally happened in draft 2: when the entire crew is here, this time, and ready for the final countdown, to relive the experience of being trapped in a ship that's disintegrating. No more heroes left behind. I'd been so tired writing this chapter in draft 1, but this time around it was incredible. Everything went up sharply from here, both in terms of events and how on fire I was.

(Maybe less than the gorgon, but I was.)

ACT 5

Echo Terminal

The first of the two log chapters.

I've never written smoother, more visual chapters than in this period. Days in Darkness changed me so much, I was writing day and night by this point and couldn't get enough. Well, I hit my limit in the second half of the very last chapter, but I am beyond satisfied. Even the Beast's metamorphosis took me by storm, because I'd been wondering what the final verbs, the final images, the final design for it was going to be. I didn't expect it to come to me this early, and with such thrill. Those were my very best days of the year, and I toast to them.

(And I knew it was going to be fantastic when Halo's Warthog Run OST started blaring in my head, with as much adrenaline.)

Where, Now? + Solgesis

My beloved. The second and last of the two log chapters, but it’s Noelle Saintlark’s log.

Holloway’s timeline ends here. Or maybe it just gets carried into the future. I thought I’d want to rewrite his parts again, make the plot just a tiny bit more psychedelic and nonsensical because it’s so close to the Beast… but Solgesis put all my fears to rest. Even the formatting and layout is a bit of that special thing I’ve always wanted to try, and it really changes the perspective of the previous chapters. There's a new confession that stands at the heart of Holloway's stories.

Honestly, the only thing that needs urgent working on is the anger at the end of the chapter.

Anger is so hard for me to write sometimes. Not because I don’t connect with it, but because I feel self-conscious writing it. The wildest I felt it was when I tackled 'quiv's chapter 3 and Imera's Turning speech, both in quick succession (before I'd even written draft 1. I'd been taking notes.) Since then... I just thing back to how keenly I'd felt that anger, and I kind of intimidate myself out of it. Kind of like a natural resistence, I quench it from myself. Which is actually hilarious when you think about it. It’s like I’m going I BANISH THEE FROM MY BRAIN because generally, as a person, I dislike feeling and operating on anger. But no worries. I’m going to find a way around it.

Watch me😎.

What Goes Around…

(Now it’s the time for me to start crying some rivers, and, alright, it won’t be visible so I’ll say it: the chapter titles are holding a conversation, guys. They speak to each other. And sometimes it’s both sides of the same coin, like how What Goes Around (comes around) hints here. If you take two chapters, one from the beginning and one from the end (for example 1 and 21) it'll tell you a little secret. Okay, What Goes Around and Rain Through the Universe communicate through their plot, which I can’t spoil but of course it has to do with Madigan and Spica and how they first meet… but there is one title pair that does it best visibly. 

Lemon-Dotted Days and Days in Darkness.

And I hadn’t even planned this. All the parallels I wanted to draw… I feel like they built themselves, guys. They really did, and it makes me so wildly happy I don’t even know how to stop my hands from flailing.

And, with them being 21 chapters, they meet in the middle, on the one unpaired chapter.

Called Toast to the Light.

I friggin’ love everything.

New Sunrise, Forget-Me-Right

Of course, Forget-Me-Right is a play on Scorpion Grass. But it’s also such a gentle name for the chapter, because everything ends here. Lying on their backs, staring out into the universe, and it really, really is over. Just a dark horizon on which stars flare and bloom. And suddenly, that maddened rush to make every sacrifice count, to remember every soul they’ve encountered because the legend says the Beast absorbs you when it kills you – all that suffocating pressure dissipates. Lightness remains. Because they’ve protected each other.

For the first time in my writing journey, blood rushed to my head with such emotion I had to stop writing, which never happens. I had to look up and exclaim, holy fuck. But how could I not, considering how the story ends for the Beast? I am speechless. A lot of gorgeous surprises this draft.

Conclusion□●□

Whew, what a year it's been! As for how 2024 will probably look like, though I don't like making plans: finishing the beta stage for 'quiv, and tackling RoaN and AoS's draft 3. Thaaaat one I'm actually starting on Christmas, when I can (finally!!) reread draft 2 with my mug of hot cocoa (or maybe mulled wine for a change) and, no surprises here, I'm hyper stoked for that<3 <3 <3 I legit can't wait to see where the new draft brings them. I might not have set any expectations for them, but they're vying to keep up with 'quiv and I adore it🤭❤

As for my lovely friends... well, you know by how I spam your tags how much I adore you and wish you happiness forever🤩🥺🥳 I don't know what my activity will look like in the near future, so for now I won't be saying anything, and my semi-hiatus continues. Semi, because you're unforgettable and I crave to see what everyone's been up to and (!!!!) what you've written!

So let's meet in 2024 again, and all the best wishes to you, the reader🥰🥂❤.

[anticidic]

What's your ffavorite AU or version of Dazai/Chuuya/BSD? :3

oop, hello!! 👀

That's...actually really hard for me to say, because I feel like every AU/version of skk turns into total brainrot for me. I don't make the rules, the brain just makes it happen and I obsess. This got so unintentionally long I'm sorry in advance. (Hid the rest of it under a read more because wow I'll just keep going if you let me)

For versions: definitely BEAST. It's not even funny how I'll just yap in DMs or in tags about my love for BEAST, and not even just beast!skk, but all the beast versions of the characters that appear. It holds a special place in my heart because I feel like it had so much what-if potential and had the perfect amount of angst that even when I read it a third time, my eyes will still get watery knowing what the ending is. Definitely bittersweet, because I always find myself rooting for the cast by the end, but what do you mean Mori's overcome with guilt about a certain young man he failed to save and doesn't want that to happen again in Atsushi? 😭 my heart.

AUs: UH. I have major kitsunezai brainrot. Even before I started writing, I loved all the fanart of him as a kitsune (and the official art which jumpstarted it all!!) and now that I dipped my toes into writing kitsunezai, he won't leave my head. He thinks it's funny tormenting me with random scenes and ideas that I should write when I'm trying my hardest to give others things love and attention. I usually like pairing him with human!chuuya because it can offer some angst potential with a nine-tailed fox who's pretty much immortal with an actual mortal. Dazai being a lonely shut-in on a mountain lamenting a lack of human connection, Chuuya comes along, and he learns to make the best of it. It also can offer a lot of silly moments with kitsune powers like shapeshifting, illusion manipulation, foxfire, etc. so the idea of him using those to mess with Chuuya and mess with people as a whole tickles me.

Special mention for angel/demon AU that unlocked something in me after writing it. I like it for being ~scandalous~ in the same way that angel/demon!skk are still on opposite sides and supposed to despise each other because that's the name of the game, and yet. I found it hard to actually fit either of them into either angel or demon because there's cases where both of them could be either an angel or a demon. Angels aren't stereotypically benevolent, they can be mischievous, just like how demons aren't all needlessly cruel.

Also: what-if AUs like pm!boss Chuuya where it's like BEAST-adjacent but Chuuya is the boss and Dazai remains underboss. Angsty. Delicious. I mentioned once before where Chuuya would definitely make for a pretty good boss if he was the one destined to take up the role, but he's different from Mori and Dazai in how he approaches life and how he sees others. Having to make a choice that involves someone's death would be mentally taxing on him and he'd internalize that, even knowing he was making the right decisions.

[hbyrde36]

Writers 20 questions tag game!!

Tagged by @devondespresso, thanks friend!

And @sidekick-hero 💜

I haven't done this one in long enough that I think some answers will be different, so let's give it a go!

divider by @/saradika-graphics

1. How many works do you have on AO3?

27

2. What's your total AO3 word count?

461,264

3. What fandoms do you write for?

Stranger Things/Steddie

4. What are your top 5 fics by kudos?

Hellfire Ink Shelter In Place Times Like These (both versions are neck and neck!) Life is a Game (and True Love is a Trophy) Steve Harrington: Vampire Hunter

5. Do you respond to comments?

Yes! I try to respond to all comments even if it's just emojis. Comments mean SO much and I like to let readers know how much I appreciate them and their words of encouragement!

6. What is the fic you wrote with the angstiest ending?

Though I do write a lot of angst, I'm a happy endings only kinda gal, so not many angsty endings save for one or two very short ficlets. 🤣

7. What's the fic you wrote with the happiest ending?

That's a tough one! As I said above, happy endings only here so there are too many to try and choose between! 'I Don't Think We're In Hawkins Anymore, Big Boy' is probably my most lighthearted work in general, so that one definitely comes to mind. I think the most hard-earned happy ending would be a tie between Times Like These and Life is a Game.

8. Do you get hate on fics?

Not so far, and I feel so lucky for that. Fingers crossed it stays that way!

9. Do you write smut? If so, what kind?

I do! It tends to be part of larger stories for me. And that's nothing against PWP, I LOVE me some PWP, I don't know if my smut is good enough to stand on it's own like that, but I am getting more comfortable with it! At the end of the day, with Steddie no matter what else the plot contains I'm also writing a romance, and most of the time the smut winds up happening naturally within the story. To me, the boys are almost always down bad for each other on sight, so it's only inevitable that they wind up falling in bed together, one way or another. 😆

10. Do you write crossovers?

I have written two crossover/fusion au's! So far 'I Don't Think We're In Hawkins Anymore, Big Boy' is a Wizard of Oz AU. Steve Harrington: Vampire Hunter is an Anita Blake AU

11. Have you ever had a fic stolen?

Not that I know of! 🤞

12. Have you ever had a fic translated?

Not that I know of, but I wouldn't mind!

13. Have you ever co-written a fic before?

I have not, but with the right partner I think it would be a fun thing to try!

14. What's your all-time favorite ship?

For now I'll have to say Steddie. It's the first ship I've ever put this much time and energy into.

15. What's a WIP you want to finish but doubt you will?

At the moment I don't have any real WIPS that I don't fully intend on finishing. Now, I do have a folder full of random ideas, many of the docs within only have a few sentences worth of words and I'm sure many of those will sadly go unwritten.

16. What are your writing strengths?

I don't know if that's for ME to say, but I THINK I do good dialog and banter. I know when I'm writing the dialog is always what comes easiest, and usually first before the rest of the story.

17. What are your writing weaknesses?

Rushing/not expanding on some things. I think sometimes I rush through certain areas or aspects of a story that maybe I think will be boring, but would benefit from a little room the breathe.

18. Thoughts on writing dialogue in another language in fic?

It wouldn't bother me in reading as long as the dialog is either explained somehow or if I'm just not supposed to know what the character is saying. It hasn't come up in my own writing so I'm not sure how I'd handle that scenario.

19. First fandom you wrote for?

This one! Stranger Things/Steddie.

20. Favorite fic you've written?

Honestly, I can't choose! BUT there is one I'm very fond of that has for whatever reason VERY low hits. It was my fic for the STWG Hozier Project for the song 'From Eden'. Just a short thing with a 3k word count limit, but I adore it. Honey, You're Familiar

No pressure tags! @pearynice @vecnuthy @griefabyss69 @rocknrollsalad @hornedqueenofhell

@shares-a-vest @soaringornithopter @steddiecameraroll @klausinamarink

[lara-cairncross]

Hi I did not expect to be hit with this much nostalgia for pixie hollow fairies lol

The way you draw them is so pretty!?!?!?!?! I love their designs so much

I'm considering drawing fanart now, especially since I saw the suggestion of drawing my personal OCs in your fairy au, and I realized.... I have an oc. That I created recently. Like so recently that I haven't even named her yet. And she's already kinda fairy-like??? She's the result of a one-night stand between Leo and a random bird yokai who decided to dump the egg on Leo (it's the accidental baby acquisition trope except its more like you-really-should-have-expected-this-leo baby acquisition XD)

Don't worry though, she's not bird-like enough to want to eat your fairy boys if she met them. She's basically just a feathered turtle who loves shiny things, and I haven't even finalized her design but now I wanna draw her as a fairy haha. I do know her feathers are blue-purple-pink-ish with red streaks, so her colour scheme matches Fairy Leo haha

Hmmmm maybe I should actually put a question here uhh....

You keep hinting at plot points but you've also said you don't plan on making this a comic, so are we ever going to find out what the heck is going on???

And I know the idea of making a whole entire comic can seem overwhelming, but have you considered viewing it as just doodling and practicing? For my own au comic I only have one part drawn so far and it is the first part, but I'm planning to just draw any part of the story at any point in time, just depending on what I feel like. Cuz no one says you have to do it the "normal" way, right? And I like to think of drawing the comic pages as practicing new skills, like learning how to do page layouts and composition better. Aka focus on the journey and not the end goal.

Whoo, that got kinda long and I only really asked one question, but based on previous asks you've answered I have a feeling you don't mind ;)

OK that was entirely just stream of thought after going through the whole au tag (there are more thoughts but most are incoherent and overlapping so this is what i managed to pick out of my brain), but to summarize: I love your fairy au and the boys are gonna be living in my head now, along with every other version of the turtles that I love <3 <3 <3

I'm glad to hear you're liking the fairy au!! I had a ton of fun coming up with their designs :D

I do actually plan on making this into a comic of sorts! I dunno if I could ever make, like, a long-form webcomic or anything like that-- but I'm definitely planning on doing at *least* a few mini-comics to elaborate on the story! And maybe build my way up to something longer and more fulfilled :D As of now, I'm trying to experiment with different comic styles on my own time so I can try and find something that's quick and easy, but still looks decent. I like the idea of treating it as essentially a glorified doodle page. Honestly, as soon as I try to take any of my stories too seriously, I burn out fast-- so I'm trying to stay pretty chill about this one and just making content whenever I feel like it lol

Yup, I'm totally cool with everyone drawing their OCs as fairies if they want to! It's not like I own the idea or anything lmao. The only caveat is that I have jurisdiction over whether or not something is canon to my particular au. Leo and the rest of the boys are still canonically kids/teenagers to me, and I've been writing/drawing them as kids this entire time, so I won't be including anything/anyone related to one of them having a "one night stand" with somebody. I can't really police what anyone else draws though, so have fun :D

Sorry about these little guys buzzing around in your brain ❤️💜🧡🩵

[avelera]

Come Live with Me and Be My Love ☼: how i came up with the idea :)

Funny enough, I can share with you the EXACT post detailing my thought process back from when I first had the idea!

But to looking back... I think I really just wanted to do a "fake dating/arranged marriage" type AU where Dream is sort of forced to fall in love with Hob throughout the course of pretending to be in a relationship?

Like I truly think that if you put a gun to his head and told Dream "You have to marry ONE living human and stay with them for a year," he'd first scoff at the notion and think it's beneath him but again, gun to his head, would probably be like, "Hob has occasionally amused me in the past and might not be totally unbearable/doomed if I was forced to spend more than the usual amount of time with him so, sure, let's go with Hob." But like... not *really* expecting to get anything more out of it for himself beyond some mildly interesting sex?

But I think Hob is kind of the essence of, "I do much better in the interview than on the application." Like on *paper* as a former peasant etc, he's not really a good match for Dream. But he's *so* resilient, and *so* likable and *so* willing to put up with Dream's bullshit and (in my opinion) so starving for pour all his affection onto someone like Dream (well, *specifically* Dream) who isn't going to up and die on him that once you're trapped in the web of a relationship with him, you're like, "Oh shit, this guy is some grade A husband material, huh?"

So I was really interested in writing a version of Dream who *isn't* in love with Hob, who doesn't *expect* to ever love Hob, but thinks Hob is tolerable in a "If I had to pick a human" sort of way, only to get smacked across the face with like, wow this guy is actually *amazing* and an *amazing* match for me and wow this is all gone to shit real quick and all my plans are in tatters because this guy I knew who once had *fleas* is a really amazing husband and partner and we're very well suited and oh no, I'm actually really falling in love???

And 1789 made the most sense to put that story in, I want to say, for a variety of reasons, but mostly it seemed hmmm.... It seemed the era where Dream had the most *recent* memory of having been at least a little tempted to sleep with Hob. So if it's within a few decades of that meeting (it had to be decades later, I wasn't going to place it directly in 1789 because Hob *had* to have made some amends for the shipping business before that, he had to be LONG out of that business before I'd cast him as a romantic lead) and Dream, gun to his head, was told he had to pick a human, I figured it was realistic that he'd go, "Oh yeah, Hob and I had that flirty exchange recently. He doesn't seem *totally* unbearable, if I had to pick a human." (1589 or 1889 the vibe would be VERY different and Dream absolutely would NOT have picked Hob, and obviously Giving Sanctuary is my 1689 take on if their relationship started then).

But yeah, mostly it was out of a desire to see Dream give Hob a chance and for Hob to knock it out of the park, and then everything sort of fell into place after that that it would be a wager gone wrong, that it would be post 1789, etc etc because that was the supporting details necessary for this sort of silly wager to occur, y'know?

[ben-101-rewrite]

Before I say anything else I absolutely love love love EVERYTHING about this rewrite. You’ve done an excellent job, and I can’t wait to see how you evolve this.

Having aliens influence bens personality, expanding the worldbuilding, expanding Vilgax as a villain to be more complex in his plans and have a bigger place in the universe, The Dagon arc was a masterclass, malware arc was INSANE back to back cinema!

Two questions: First, bonus points for not having ultimate way big show up just to lose (my favourite alien got an ultimate and got shafted and I was SO MAD)

Will we see ultimates come back in this AU?

Second, I had a massive crush on Julie as a kid, and I was so mad at how dirty she was done. Thank you for giving her and Ben more couple time and a sweeter send off. Also I’m totally obsessed with what you’ve given us about Julie 10

I am a shipper at heart, Who’s is gonna be endgame for Ben? Esther, Kai, someone else?

Thank you for your time !

Thank you! It's been fun showcasing my version of writing for this series, and I am glad people enjoy it haha. For the ultimates, they will be in UA still, with most likely more forms and more story behind them. I've mentioned a few concepts here and there. And they will make a return with Albedo in Omniverse, because I like him having the gimmick to showcase more difference between him and Ben. As for the second question, end game is still Ben and Julie, lol. I'm too much of a Benlie shipper to not, and trying to do the Kai story just doesn't feel right for me or her character, even if her and Ben still date. Ben and Julie do break up at the end of UA, but I'm using that as more of a time for them to grow, showcasing that sometimes you need space from someone in order to make it work down the line. I think it's good to showcase a wide style of dynamics and relationships people can have, especially in romance.

[be-the-glenn-to-my-maggie]

It's been some weeks but here I am now to respond to your response lol. So first of all, I'm definitely leaning towards nocorro but tbh I have like a few versions of this au in my head, all of which lead Spider down different paths depending on his love interest (or lack thereof) because I feel like each one would bring out something different in his ikran ambitions:

Spider/Neteyam - he fulfills his dream of becoming a racer.

Spider/Lo'ak - he eventually travels all over Pandora to learn everything he can about ikrans, becoming an expert in caring for, training, and riding them.

Spider/Kiri - he becomes an amazing ikran caretaker, focusing his energy on the health and well-being of them.

Spider/Rotxo - he realizes that the na'vi avoid riding the forest ikrans (which I imagine are what would dominate the forests of the Metkayina's islands) because of their size but he is just the right size. This leads to him being the first to utilize the smaller island ikrans with an interesting twist.

Spider/Ao'nung - he actually creates ilu racing in this one lol, it's all part of this storyline in my head where he manages to use his knowledge of both ikran training and human animal training methods to adapt to an ilu style and bond/train an ilu into helping him escape Quaritch. I'll tell you more info in another ask if you want it's a whole thing.

Spider/Tsireya - he paves the way for a new ikran sport: a mash between equestrian trick riding/vaulting, with quite a bit of acrobatics included.

Spider & the Sullies - he becomes their personal trainer, bonding with each individual family member and their ikrans and helping them to make their own marks on the ikran rider community all while helping to heal the distance within the family (among Jake and the boys specifically). I like to think that in this one he bonds with a forest ikran and carves out a place in ikran racing all his own.

And these are all very much active in my mind. I've always loved the idea that just one choice, one source of influence, could change your fate. I like the idea that there's a universe where Spider and Neteyam fall in love and become an ikran racing power couple and I like the idea that there's another universe where Kiri beat Neteyam to the punch and instead Spider focuses on all he can do to care for these amazing creatures, etc.. You can see what parts of him each path brings out.

On another note, some of your hc's will definitely be making an appearance because there were a few that I loved and thought fit so perfectly with what I pictured. I look forward to you seeing which ones stuck with me lol. And I love that others have their own interpretations that they want to write about! It'd be so fun to see what others come up with! Fun fact: I never intended for Spider to become a racer himself, I was vibing with the concept of him being this amazing ikran whisperer who brings a different perspective to the bond between person and animal, but because of the reaction that you and others have had I've added that into my thoughts!

Anyways, I know I work slowly but trust and believe I can't wait to get the next installment out so hang in there! Oh, and I can't believe I forgot to send you a link to my newest fic

https://archiveofourown.org/works/48596428

You totally don't have to read it, I'm still not even 100% sure if I like it myself, but idk I've sent you a link before so it'd just feel rude if I didn't now that I've started to? Does that make sense? Another update is that I will in fact be adding on to Follow Me Down to the Peach Tree, which I figured is something you might look forward to :)

~ CherryApollo

Hello icon CherryApollo. I'm so sorry this ask has taken me SO long to respond to, I wanted to read back on our old chats to refresh my memory but just like the nocorro accidentally mated post that an anon asked me to find the other day, I cannot find the posts even though I know it's tagged properly. I don't know if maybe it doesn't show up unless the tag is in the first few tags of the post? Someone send help.

BUT ANYWAYS, we will have to just focus on this. I agree that every Spider love interest just brings out a different side of Spider, which would result in different Spider ikran racing ambitions all around. I find it interesting that he travels in the locorro one, because I've always associated it with Kiri and Spiri. The yearning to explore more of Eywa's creations and to connect with her in different ways, and to meet more Na'vi and to see where and how they live. It's so Kiri to me, just wanting to be more a part of Pandora and see more of Pandora. I don't hate it for Lo'ak though, he's so restless and he is such a fast and adaptive learner when he's invested.

I am OBSESSED with the idea of Spider and a forest ikran, and I'm shocked no one has done it yet. They are! Spider sized!!! It's so perfect! He can fit into smaller spaces and make tighter and faster maneuvers and turns, and I bet him and Neytiri could spend hours seeing how traditional ikran racing could translate to this slightly different creature and style.

OBVIOUSLY I want more info on Spider escaping Quaritch via ilu bonding?? That's amazing, it shakes up the whole story! Would he find Awa'atlu right away or would he end up at a different village first? I have been drawn lately to the Spider escaping and finding the Sully's fic's I've seen around, although I've never seen one get past a few chapters. It's such an interesting concept!

I absolutely adore always when people are inspired by my thoughts, and I think it will be so so fun to see what sticks and what you liked and what you change!!! Please don't worry about working slow, I've been answering slow lately.

AND I SAW YOUR NEWEST FIC, I am so behind on my fic reading but I checked yours out before I posted this. I commented :) and please, it's not rude at all to send me a fic, sometimes I miss them in the shuffle so I appreciate it!

I ALSO HAVE BEEN SO OBSESSED WITH THAT FIC, I'M SO EXCITED THEY'LL BE AN UPDATE. I'll tell you, I have been so stuck on the idea of writing something original in its world. Loosely in its world, I guess, but just a soulmate world where if your soulmate is dead you can see their ghost, but also all the ghosts can all see each other as well. I've been stuck on this idea of a person whose soulmate is a ghost and as a result they're kind of an unattached loner. They are a private investigator who uses their ghost soulmate talking to other ghosts to help solve crimes. I'm thinking that they'll end up with another person whose soulmate is dead that they meet, a sort of vibe where they aren't the others supposed person but maybe things worked out the way it was supposed to in a fucked up way. It's just a weird concept I haven't been able to get rid of that I figured I'd let you know you inspired, lol.

[naranjapetrificada]

Okay I've gotta come into your askbox to scream about From the Firmament!! I am just so continuously impressed by the obvious care you put into every single sentence. Anyway (and this totally isn't just me fishing for more about the next chapter): what's the latest on the Izzy POV section? He's so frustrating for me to write personally (lack of joy and whimsy gets to me 🙃) so I can't wait to see how you handle him!

You are always, always welcome to scream into my ask box, my dear! And it's funny you should ask about the Izzy POV section, because I actually have a draft WIP Wednesday post from this week that was gonna include a snippet of that. In the way that I needed to get the first chapter posted in order to get certain worldbuilding facts established or I was never going to move on, it kind of feels like I need to get eyes on Izzy as he appears in the world of FtF.

It's not even his character that I feel like I'm struggling with anymore, it's mainly a) creating a believable voice and even moreso b) deciding what information to reveal/examine through him vs other characters. His voice is tricky for a lot of reasons but at the end of the day I can wave my AU magic wand and attribute things to the circumstances being different. The other thing though? God.

It feels so fundamental that his perspective should be heavily skewed and extremely divergent from Ed's in particular, and that's felt so hard to pull off. It matters what elements of their shared backstory get revealed through Izzy and what gets revealed through Ed, because things that seemed important to one of them are almost guaranteed to be incidental to the other.

Like a good example is how Izzy has this awe about him (even if he's in awe of an imagined version of Ed) that means that in any universe, he probably places greater weight on the first time he met Ed than Ed does. If you ask either of them what they remember about something they experienced together, Ed's recollection will zoom in on details that Izzy missed but ignore other things. But because it's a shared history, you could look the eyes of either one to explore it.

Because the options feel so endless, the parts of the Izzy POV that have remained fairly static are the ones where he's not directly thinking about Ed or the [redacted], [redacted], or [significantly longer redaction] in their past that would inform how he sees the scene he's narrating. His intro paragraph, initial reaction to Stede, and discomfort with the sense of freedom that always lingers in Stede's wake were super easy to pull together because it's all right there in canon. But in order to figure out anything else I've had to keep writing and rewriting certain things from his perspective or Ed's, bouncing back and forth until it feels right. Which makes the act of writing chapter 3 literally take longer of course, but also makes it harder to approach because it feels like a much bigger task.

Not to turn this into a general chapter 3 update but basically:

Stede's section (yes, only one!) is pretty much done beyond line edits.

See all of the above paragraphs for the Izzy of it all.

Ed takes me a long time, but most of another Ed section has been done since before I even posted the first chapter. A lot of the initial worldbuilding came out of that part, even! Ed also opens the chapter, and I've mostly got that part squared away too.

So basically all that remains is The Izzy Question and the final section, which I know the shape of and shouldn't have anything like the Izzy issues with. It feels like not a lot at all, but also like so, so much. Maybe you asking will give me the courage to share a couple paragraphs from his section though? I was actually poking at it this morning. Maybe getting something out there will settle some of these open questions for me and I can move on?

Thank you sooooo much, I could talk about this forever. If anyone else wants to, you are always welcome to send an ask about my fic if the mood strikes.