#this was for a D&G related thing

[maximura]

[kittygirlari]

yea sex with an older man is nice but what about being yearned, loved, and taken care of by one :(

[silusvesuius]

[toa-greatmind-nothingislittle]

@ponyoisms // Supernatural 4x18 - "The Monster at the End of This Book" // quote by Julian K. Jarboe // Pomegranate Jews, by Esther Rosen // "Closer to Fine" by the Indigo Girls // poem by Yehuda Amichai (taken from the "Mishkan T'filah for Travelers: A Reform Siddur") // "Good Omens: The Nice and Accurate Prophecies of Agnes Nutter, Witch" by Neil Gaiman and Terry Pratchet // "Cleopatra and Frankenstein" by Coco Mellors // "The Naval Treaty" by Sir Arthur Conan Doyle // photo of La Piccola Gerusalemme, taken by my parents // "JEWISH LESBIANS" Gay Freedom Day Parade, San Francisco, California c. 1978 // "The Two Towers" directed by Peter Jackson // YEHUDIT, by Pinchas EL Segal // Mi Chamochah (taken from the "Mishkan T'filah for Travelers: A Reform Siddur") // Supernatural 8x16 - "Remember the Titans" // Supernatural 5x14 - "My Bloody Valentine" // Fantasy High 1x17 - "Prompocalypse Pt. 2" // "Seven Brief Lessons on Physics" by Carlo Rovelli // "K.-4-1976," by Peter Krasnow // "The Death of Adam: Essays on Modern Thought" by Marilynne Robinson // Pirkei Avot, quote by Rabbi Tarfon // Jacob Wrestling With The Angel, by Ephraim Moses Lilien // photo of Judaica from La Piccola Gerusalemme, taken by my parents // "The Fellowship of the Ring" by J.R.R. Tolkein // Supernatural 6x15 - "Live Free or Twihard" // Kneading Dough, by Katherine Hartel // Neverafter 1x17 - "The Last Wish" // Mirjam, by Ephraim Moses Lilien // "Rosh Hashanah Postcards." Hidden Treasures: Celebrating Jewish Archives in Britain

[majorasnightmare]

Inevitable Gerudo Headcanon Posting

i spend too much time thinking about the gerudo like genuinely theyre one of my favorite recurring tribes in the zelda series, which as we all know is a form of suffering because god forbid nintendo stop relying on racist tropes and caricatures.

keeping in line with this nintendos portrayal of the gerudo tends to either be 1) why theyre bad, and/or 2) how a culture of all women has kids. like thats an oversimplification of ALLL the problems present in the gerudos portrayal but thats a different post for another time. in general i bring this up because it means, for me as well as any others interested and invested un the gerudo, that there is a kind of generalized lack of pre botw characterization or cultural concepts to work with, esp when compared to the other tribes of hyrule. (looks pointedly at how theres no gerudo in the gerudo desert but there is a prison slash execution site where their king was held. LOOKS AT WHO SURVIVED THE PROLOGUE CUTSCENE IN WINDWAKER)

ANYWAYS. botw was really fun because, while it had plenty of its own issues with the gerudo, they were at least non hostile! so with that in mind, the headcanons and worldbuilding i write primarily apply to the wilds era gerudo, which spans the timeframe between ganondorfs reign as king to totk (suspending disbelief because that timeframe is. by all accounts. longer than recorded human history. friendly reminder ganondorf does All That before we even get sheikah wifi towers. christ.)

anyways. second verse same as the first, core assumptions and then a readmore

Some core assumptions:

The BotW branch of the timeline is chronologically set AFTER the previous timeline, ie the events of ToTKs ancient past is set AFTER the last event of the Hyrule Historia timeline. essentially they all come back together to form one line that makes up ToTKs ancient era

The biggest effect on Hyrules topography was the flooding in Wind Waker. after an unknown point, the flooding ocean receded leaving behind the ruins of ancient Hyrule. at some point after that, the zonai settled parts of it and made the buildings wed see as ruins by the time of BotW. slowly the various tribes of hyrule immigrated back

all peoples within the setting of hyrule are loosely grouped into categories called tribes. in this sense, tribe refers a collection of peoples with shared traits, without anything concretely set in stone (for example, hyrule includes the tribe of hylians, the tribe of gorons, the tribe of koroks, etc etc). the main six who show up repeatedly can be considered the sage tribes (gerudo, hylian, sheikah, rito, goron, zora), and the various types of enemies can be considered the monster tribes (the blin tribe of bokoblin, moblin, bulblin, etc)

so. starting at the beginning. near entirely headcanons

in ocarina of time, we see the spirit temple, where Nabooru awakens as a sage. this temple features a MASSIVE statue of a woman adorned with a snake and its primary mechanic centers around mirrors and reflected light. while the mirrors return, we dont really get that same kind of implied spiritual/religious focus again. so instead im going to make a mountain out of a molehill and position her as the primary spiritual figure here. im running low on name ideas tho so suggestions are much appreciated. for right now ill refer to her as the serpent goddess

the gerudo are culturally a people of function over form, practicality over whimsy, but when circumstances allow for it, are drawn like any other to arts and music and decoration. they have a long history of bloody, brutal battle, and while the war has long since ended, its kings buried and its warriors naught but ghosts, the desert remembers. its sands haunted by the bloodstains of conflict past, and echoes of ancient tragedies. the gerudo here in the era of wilds may have lost their records of their ancient history of conflict, but some aspects, preserved by the sands, have managed to survive the onslaught of time

surviving all this time is the ancient creation myth of the gerudo people. as legend tells it, long ago in the time before myth, there existed a goddess whos power was transformation. she was possessed of two forms, one a proud humanoid figure, the other a striking serpentine form twisting through the heavens with ease, her scales glittering with mirror sheen. to shift from serpent to human, she would shed her skin, and grow it back again to embrace her serpentine form anew

seven times she shed her skin, and from these shed skins rose the first gerudo, each embodying a key aspect of their sacred mother. the serpent goddess's scales are each a nascent soul of a gerudo, and when those scales are shed and fall to the land below, a new gerudo is born. likewise, when a gerudo dies, their soul returns to the scales of the serpent goddess, to await until they would descend again and reincarnate once more. the seven daughters of the serpent goddess led these gerudo as their guardians, leaders, and protectors. but, away from the seven heroines and their new people, the goddess shed her skin an eighth time. this daughter was born alone, and while her sisters embodies the strengths of spirit, flight, endurance, knowledge, motion, skill, and gentleness, the eighth was born with insatiable wanderlust. learning of this, the seven sisters cursed her name for leaving them and their people behind, and despite their shared ancestry, the eighth was forbidden to be spoken of. this suited her just fine, and the eighth was free to walk the land and learn all of its hidden paths

in time, war came to the gerudo, as it often does. though they were united, and strong, they were a small collection of people, and thus despite their proficiency were threatened nonetheless. it became clear at last that they could not stand and fight, and that to survive, they could not remain in place for long. but the enemy had pushed them deep into their home, and knew all the paths back. as hope seemed lost, as if summoned by call, the eighth sister at last wandered home. calling her seven sisters to her, she proclaimed that every hidden step was known to her, and while she lacked the power to guide them on her own, together they would escape unseen into the night, their enemy none the wiser. thus, skillfully guiding the skills of her sisters, the eighth heroine led the gerudo into safety, and the seven were humbled from their pettiness. seeking to apologize to the sister they had banished and forgotten, the seven sought to make amends, but the eighth was content merely to have a place of remembrance among them. to wander is not a sin, as long as one remembers where their home lies.

the eight heroines have long since passed and returned to their mothers scales, but the virtues they embody are cherished by the gerudo family they left behind, seeking to hold their memory close even as the years wear on

to the gerudo was bestowed the blessing of the element of Spirit, embodied by their iron wills and manifesting as crackling lightning. this spirit lightning is the gerudo's will made tangible, arcing out towards their target as an extension of their focus and sheer determination. to a gerudo, nothing is impossible until one has devoted themselves entirely to it, giving it their all, and only then may it be conceded

a long history of persecution has resulted in the gerudo being increasingly insular and isolationist. their admiration of the art of combat and how it can bring forth an individuals talents, achieving a perfect harmony between body and will as the weapon became an extension of ones limbs, was often perceived as aggression by outsiders, who would react as if to defend their own interests. the gerudo have suffered much at the hands of hyrule at large, and have pulled further and further away.

as the gerudo pulled away from hyrule, and hyrule from them, they devoted most of their attention to themselves. cooperation amongst themselves is seen as paramount to their survival, and familial affection often extends well past ones blood relations.

the gerudo value family, and loyalty, alongside independence and cooperation. everyone should have the opportunity to pursue their goals, but if someone is struggling, it is the responsibility of everyone to help. children are raised by as many people as are available, and even in the times of monarchy, the palace was less a formal dwelling place belonging to the gerudo ruler and more a public forum that the ruler simply happened to live in

most of the palaces amenities are fully public, a tradition that has carried on to riju's time. meals are communal and the kitchens open to all, and the palace has no strictly dedicated servants, merely a collection of amenities the gerudo people are free to use at will and often do so together. what this means is that there is no servant, for example, dedicated to preparing riju's meals but instead a collection of people willing to cook and willing to eat making meals riju partakes in, and this applies to most other menial tasks as well. the throne room is where the leader of the gerudo engages in their job as public servant, attending to the needs of the gerudo at large and responding to crises as they arise.

as nintendo is keen to point out, the gerudo are a people that are predominantly "all women", and thus spends plenty of time going over dialogue wherein people wonder how they have children and including a plethora of sidequests in the wilds era about acquiring partners. im ignoring all of that and instead going by lizard rules, in part because here theyre descended from a serpent dragon goddess, wherein a population of all female lizards were able to successfully maintain a stable population and have children without major issue. gerudo like ganondorf are the equivalent of a rare genetic mutation that flips some other genes on and has a different result, that really doesnt affect anything besides this one kid and doesnt have any major effects or differences in their life. two gerudo are perfectly capable of having kids together, having relationships as usual, and on the topic of "how do the gerudo have kids", thats all i really feel like exploring that topic

with an insular, isolationist culture that appeared for all intents and purposes to be all women, the gerudo were often a source of major culture shock when interacting with the other tribes of hyrule, most notably hylians

bonus hylian lore: hylians experience an even greater lack of sexual dimorphism than irl humans do, so gender presentation is near exclusively presentation based, with a heavy emphasis on clothing. showing skin is considered an act of emotional intimacy, and most hylians opt to cover as much as they can. the intensity of presentation scales upwards with their role in society, with the royal family having the most extreme form of gender presentation. gender is presented through clothing style and hair length, with ornamentation, jewelry, and piercings serving as a kind of intensifier, and hylian culture at large tends to operate on a sliding scale of masculine to feminine, with the middle androgynous zone being a weird gender spot for them

the gerudo, by contrast, never really developed a concept of masculinity versus femininity. gender pronouns in gerudo are based on personal proximity, occupation in society, and familiarity. these barely translate at all into hyrulean.

as the gerudo, by circumstance or by choice, interacted with hylians and the tribes of hyrule more and more often, some kind of understanding had to be reached with regards to translation. as relations were already terse, making an attempt to fully translate the gerudos understanding of gender to your average hylian was considered a fools errand, and thus translation was done in broad strokes, giving hylians the simplest root form of gender pronouns (and none of the increasingly specific declensions). loosely, the term vai is closer in concept to "us" and voe is closer to "not us" "foreigner" "outsider", and has taken on a connotation of " forbidden" or "taboo" (leading to wilds era gerudo secret clubs often imploying translatable Adult Puns regarding their catering to voe and the overall titillating atmosphere they tend to put on for customers). with regards to hylians, the feminine princesses and queens had more in common with the gerudo and were thus "vai", but the masculine kings and soldiers, who were often the main figures pushing aggressive efforts into conquering or otherwise absorbing the gerudo into hyrule, were "voe". this was then distributed in various guides to understanding the gerudo language as " vai" meaning "woman" and "voe" meaning man

gerudo town, as the capital of their people and general hub, has a law banning the entrance of voe. at the time if its writing, this was a fairly obvious law, because most "people who are forbidden" are forbidden from entering. as time has passed, hostilities cooled, and relations warmed, this law has been the subject of a long struggle of interpretation. it doesnt translate well into nearly any other language, and thus who counts as "voe" and "vai" is subject to endless debate. the differences in gender perception are most clearly on display with the admittance of the gorons. one might assume that the gorons, being a monogendered people who typically use masculine terms of identity and endearment in hyrulean, to thus qualify as voe, but the gorons cooperative nature, near uniform monogendered culture, and emphasis on hard work and independence has enough in common with your average gerudo that considering them as vai is a no brainer

ganondorf thus is also, clearly, considered vai. the specific pronouns he uses in his native gerudo include declensions regarding his position as royalty (one that has since gone out of use and is fairly archaic now, only really being used as a kind of neo-pronoun by current era gerudo as a rebellious self identification thing), his relation as the only child of koume and kotake, and are conjugated based on relation between the speaker and him. in the ancient era, calling ganondorf voe would be so confusing as to not even read as an insult. if one really wanted to refer to ganondorf with a tone of insult, theyd substitute the declension of familiarity with one used for strangers

ganondorf achieved his position as king the old fashioned way: a gift from his moms. ancient era gerudo practiced typical monarchy with a line of succession, and koume and kotake named him as the next royal of the gerudo as their heir. the hyruleans, seeing a masculine gerudo of royal birth, referred to him as "king", and correcting a culture of people he had little respect for was just a waste of ganondorfs time. after ganondorfs sealing, the gerudo changed to the current system of chiefs, wherein the current chief names a successor, or by default passes it onto their living heir. a system is in place to democratically install a new chief if the current one passes without naming a child their heir, or naming a successor in their place, a system drafted and then used in ganondorfs absence. riju thus inherited the mantle from her mother, but could opt instead to force a vote, or have such a vote forced on her due to her age, leading to much of her insecurity seen in BotW. this system has proven to be relatively stable, especially coupled with the continued tradition of keeping the palace an open public forum

the first chief of the gerudo was nabooru, advised by the sage of lightning we see in totk, following ganondorfs sealing

the gerudo are very familiar with the souls of the dead. poes, souls lost and aimless, wander the desert after millennia of bloodshed. thus their funerary customs have persisted, even as the folklore behind them fades in and out of memory.

a person perceives reality through their body. they know the sky is above them both by craning their neck up, and by the sensation of ground beneath them. in death, one is bodiless, and sensation becomes a confusing, directionless onslaught. it is so easy for a spirit to become lost, unable to orient themselves. the gerudos funerary rites seeks to aid these souls in their journey towards returning to the serpent goddess, as without guidance they are liable to become poes. the body after death is merely an empty receptacle, and on a practical level is a potential draw for dangerous desert scavengers seeking an easy meal. the shifting sands and hard soil makes burial difficult to impossible, so instead the gerudo burn their dead. smoke is ephemeral and thus able to be seen by spirits, and even as the wind rushes, smoke will still travel upwards towards the heavens. a spirit will linger by its body for a time, and thus cremation helps provide guidance to the dead. unable to feel the earth beneath them, the dead can follow the trails of smoke to orient themselves upwards, and dispel lingering confusion

as the body is burned both to guide the departed's soul and to ward away scavengers, the gerudo inter their belongings into gravesites instead, usually one or a small collection of items that the deceased valued or were considered emblematic of them. having a proud history of warriors, many gerudo consider their weapons extensions of themselves, and thus many gravesites will consist of a single weapon.

the sage of lightnings temple served as the primary gravesite for many gerudo, and in its heyday was decorated with love and care as befitting its role. torches burned bright in its sconces and the walls painted with care in massive sweeping murals. here in the temple, a foreigners idea of the gerudo as austere and practical would fall away, as the halls shone with warmth and color, taken from their desert home

lost souls that become poes often end up becoming consumed by their regrets and despair at their inability to find their way back to reincarnation through the serpent goddess's scales, and from there turn to rage and aggression. the sunlight glinting off of the goddess's mirror scales will blind and disorient the dead who have lost their way, as they try in vain to rely on their half forgotten senses, and thus poes eschew the day in favor of the cover of night. though incorporeal, poes move as fast as the desert winds, and try all they can to cause mischief and havoc. usually the end result of their shenanigans is light injuries and scratches, but it isn't uncommon for a waylaid traveller or adrenaline seeking youngster to suffer fatal consequences. despite this, poe hunting tends to be the go-to act of rebellion for antsy teenagers with a taste for danger. in general, one of the only things fast enough to strike a poe is a fired arrow

as the sands grew and the desert expanded, it grew more and more difficult for the steeds of the gerudo to gallop across the dunes, and they were driven further and further back until the gerudo phased out their horseback traditions entirely

and as an AU specific trivia tidbit

after ganondorf's sealing, nabooru grieved the loss of her childhood friend by constructing a dedicated tomb to house ganondorf's gravesite. even though he wouldn't die, nabooru would never live to see him again, and in traditional gerudo fashion, his gravesite is marked by his signature trident, further imbued by nabooru's blessing of lighting (in a similar fashion to urbosa's fury, despite urbosa not being a sage).

[biitchcakes]

a lil collection of my favourite SMILES .

( personals DNI . )

[koushirouizumi]

Shaman King (Japanese version) ~ {Filler} Episode #49 + Y O H & M A N T A on F a u s t + Y O H & M A N T A (Interactions)

"...I g u e s s this is what {they} call 'T R A U M A'." - R y u; (speaking the word in clear English)

{Cap'd by Me} / @koushirouizumi/hikari-m {DO NOT R E P O S T} {DO NOT C O P Y} {DO NOT R E P R O D U C E WITHOUT MY P E R M I S S I O N} (Please A S K to Use!) {L I K E S O. K.}

[This is a Shaman King Positivity post!] {+Manta Positivity Post} (Please be respectful Interacting)

[DO NOT Tag with featured Character{s}/Series negativity, thank you!]

[amplexadversary]

That's how you get this thing.

You know that post about how angels and telephone towers are biologically compatible? That’s how I feel about overgrown plants and industrial machines.

[kittygirlari]

at work thinking about an older man shoving his cock down my throat and being so desperate to thank him afterwards :( <3

[deus-ex-mona]

s. s ave me, meoto…

[girlhelpicf]

the cabinet of riches directly correlates to the mental break i had in 2021 where i thought ghosts appeared to me in reflections

[talkfastcal]

Something

[whokilledsamara]

you should do a nsfw alphabet for dogday? :)

(but don’t tire yourself out, okay? ♡

you deserve a break every once in a while !!)

DOGDAY NSFW ALPHABET

a Dogday x reader list. {an: thank you sm for your kind words, i appreciate the support! happy to write for my fellow readers.}

warnings!: not too much for this one, dogday is a sweet boy. nsfw is a big one though! he is very vanilla, {ironic} and its just basic sex. this takes place BEFORE you and him escape. so yes, yall are still in the factory. {if you want me to do one from after the factory or something than send in the request and ill redo it} both amab and afab choices for reader!

A = Aftercare (what they’re like after sex)

oh boy. this man goes OVERBOARD with aftercare. he does everything he can for being in an old warehouse. so dont expect to just walk off without him doing every possible thing he can.

B = Body part (their favorite body part of theirs and also their partner’s)

he loves everything about you, so other than your face it would probably be your hips. doesnt matter the shape/size, he loves them.

on him it would be difficult to pick, being an anthropomorphic dog is kind of hard to deal with. if anything he likes his hands, big and strong.

C = Cum (anything to do with cum, basically)

as expected due to the sheer size of his body, he cums a lot. depending on where you want it is where he will put it.

D = Dirty secret (pretty self explanatory, a dirty secret of theirs)

hes a very vanilla based guy {as said, ironic} and doesnt have many dark and deep fantasies. though he would like to be topped, so i guess thats one.

E = Experience (how experienced are they? do they know what they’re doing?)

buddy is clueless. even as human this poor dog had NO game. he's definitely surprised you even want to do it with him, which will make him try his absolute hardest to please you.

F = Favorite position (this goes without saying)

doggy style. self explanatory.

G = Goofy (are they more serious in the moment? are they humorous? etc.)

hes serious but hes also very awkward at the beginning, though he gets more used to it after a while.

H = Hair (how well groomed are they? does the carpet match the drapes? etc.)

hes covered in fur so there isnt much of a difference, but his groin area has more fur than usual {almost as a happy trail}, if that answers your question.

I = Intimacy (how are they during the moment? the romantic aspect)

very romantic guy. probably more romantic than sexual. he just loves you a lot.

J = Jack off (masturbation headcanon)

never has. and probably never will as long as he has you. his sex drive is almost none as he isnt made to do that. but you tend to spark some kind of reaction from him.

K = Kink (one or more of their kinks)

petplay, collars, dom and sub, maybe more depending on how far you guys go.

L = Location (favorite places to do the do)

not many options, so preferably secluded places that you wont be bothered.

M = Motivation (what turns them on, gets them going)

you in general, but also his ears being scratched. i mean he is a dog after all.

N = No (something they wouldn’t do, turn offs)

scat, vomit, or anything abuse related.

O = Oral (preference in giving or receiving, skill, etc.)

he has a big tongue surprisingly, so he does prefer to go down on you. wether that be eating you out or sucking you off {more like licking you off} then he is good. as for receiving, he loves it, but he feels bad watching you struggle. though a part of him is attracted to it.

P = Pace (are they fast and rough? slow and sensual? etc.)

depends, usually he is slow as to not hurt you, but if you ask him to go faster he will.

Q = Quickie (their opinions on quickies, how often, etc.)

he doesnt HATE them, i mean, sex is sex and especially with you its amazing, but he prefers to take his time on you. he will never say no to a quickie tho.

R = Risk (are they game to experiment? do they take risks? etc.)

no. he doesnt want to risk hurting you, and therefore he will do everything to prevent it.

S = Stamina (how many rounds can they go for? how long do they last?)

his stamina doesnt deflate due to his dog like nature, but he tends to stop after two rounds as to keep you safe.

T = Toys (do they own toys? do they use them? on a partner or themselves?)

he is a toy, so no.

U = Unfair (how much they like to tease)

he likes to jokingly tease, not really intentionally making you horny, but this poor boy CANNOT take you teasing him. he becomes a blubbering mess and pants heavily.

V = Volume (how loud they are, what sounds they make, etc.)

not loud, but he growls and grunts. not in an aggressive way of course.

W = Wild card (a random headcanon for the character)

he really likes dry humping. like yes go up to him and shush him while you hump his thigh, hell yea.

X = X-ray (let’s see what’s going on under those clothes)

goodness gracious. i guess being over 8 foot tall really helps you pack somewhere else. your poor hole(s) honestly, hes over 12 inches LONG and probably around 6 inches wide. hes a girthy boy.

Y = Yearning (how high is their sex drive?)

as said earlier, he wasnt made for sex, so its not very high. he happily obliges for you though. and you definitely get him going.

Z = Zzz (how quickly they fall asleep afterwards)

hes a sun dog, and doesnt need sleep. but he does enjoy an occasional nap every now and then. that being said he loves sleeping with you.

{ created by @whokilledsamara }

[lady-phasma]

Armand N$FW Alphabet

I’m trying not to make these what I want to do to/with him but they are headcanon. Note: I headcanon him as omnisexual so the below works with all genders.

Warnings: I don't really think I need to put this given the title but MDNI. Mentions of sex, implied trauma, just graphic in general.

A = Aftercare (what they're like after sex)

Armand is kind and soft afterward. No matter the scenario he will check on his partner’s emotional state and offer them comfort if needed. As for himself, he won’t ask for it but sometimes he needs it (especially after anything D/s related). Although he’s usually pretty chill and relaxed afterward, at times he can be energetic and chatty. The more intense, the more chill he will be.

B = Body part (their favorite body part of theirs and also their partner's)

This is heartbreaking, but I don’t think Armand would have a favorite of his own. He’s not vain in that way and is really insecure. He does like to show off his tiddies though. As for his partner: eyes. I think he would be enamored with the eyes of all his partners.

C = Cum (anything to do with cum, basically)

A lot. I’ll throw in some weird TVC headcanon I’ve had for over 20 years: vampire cum is pale pink. It’s a blood thing, like their tears. I’ve had a lot of time to think about this stuff. Armand cums a lot. I mean a lot. (More detail under S below.) He’s indifferent to it with his partners as long as they climax, he doesn’t have a cum kink but it’s turned off by it either.

D = Dirty secret (pretty self explanatory, a dirty secret of theirs)

All of them! But seriously, maybe that he enjoys being a switch. I think Armand is much more Dominant with women, but not always. He’s very into whatever his partner is into and adjusts easily. It’s a secret because he wants to be whatever his partner needs, but he also truly enjoys the fluidity and flexibility of being a switch within the context of D/s.

E = Experience (how experienced are they? do they know what they're doing?)

Very experienced and very talented. No matter what parts his partner is rocking Armand has experience. He’s very open-minded about sex and, although maybe not particularly laid back, he has learned a lot in his time. He doesn’t like everything, but he has probably done it at least once.

F = Favorite position

As with most things, this will depend on Armand’s partner. However, he really enjoys being on the bottom and watching his partner if at all possible. Even when he feels Dominant with his partner he enjoys being underneath them. I don’t know that he has an absolute favorite, but he wants to be able to see his partner.

G = Goofy (are they more serious in the moment? are they humorous? etc.)

Armand is very serious most of the time, but not uptight during sexy times. Silly things happen during sex and he’s probably experienced it all anyway. There’s no point in making his partner nervous or embarrassed. He’s not going to be giggling during the act, but he will certainly laugh when appropriate.

H = Hair (how well groomed are they? does the carpet match the drapes? etc.)

He is so well groomed! Series canon shows us that he cares about his appearance. He is nothing if not fastidious. His pubic hair would never be neglected and it definitely matches the drapes and his glorious chest hair.

I = Intimacy (how are they during the moment?)

Armand enjoys intimacy to a degree and depending on the circumstances. He needs it more than most. It doesn’t have to be deep, but it has to be present. He is highly attuned to his partner’s emotions at any given moment so he requires that connection. Unfortunately, he doesn’t require the same attention in return. He is deeply invested in his partners and their mental/emotional state during sex.

J = Jack off (masturbation headcanon)

This act is all about efficiency and need for Armand. It’s not a self-love situation. It’s also not perfunctory exactly. He enjoys it and needs to do it. But he doesn’t light candles or watch porn. If he feels the need it’s possibly because his partner isn’t available or in the mood. It’s not a harsh affair, but it’s not going to take very long. I want to watch this so badly!

K = Kink (one or more of their kinks)

I’m going to skip the general D/s stuff because I have a couple posts about his D/s interests here and here. He’s definitely into degradation for himself (but would find it difficult to do to a partner) and he’s very into praise (for both himself and his partners). Probably his biggest kink is hands, touching and being touched (see W for more info about this). Vampires have naturally perfect manicures so their hands are generally pretty sexy, but the act of touching communicates a lot for Armand. Suck on his fingers, scratch your nails down his back, let him reciprocate, or just a soft graze of the back of your fingers against his cheek, hands might be his biggest turn on.

L = Location (favorite places to do the do)

In his own home or domicile, for sure. He needs to feel safe to let his guard down completely. He doesn’t care where, but he will be most present and relaxed in his own space (or that of his partners). He does enjoy a little public action and isn’t above public displays of affection. However, he can be himself most comfortably in a safe, familiar place.

M = Motivation (what turns them on, gets them going)

I interpreted this two ways: Armand gets excited by seeing his partner get excited and that he gets turned on by words as much as physical touch. Praise him, tell him how beautiful he is, how much you want to do to him and what (or what you want him to do to you), tell him how much you truly desire him and he’s ready to go. But watching his partner react to his words/touch makes him horny in a different way entirely. He can’t get enough of watching their eyelids flutter or them bite their lower lips involuntarily.

N = No (something they wouldn't do, turn offs)

Hard limits would be “dirty,” human bodily functions. He’s too old, too fastidious, too him to be into any of that. He doesn’t enjoy being restrained or tied up. If his partner holds him down a safe word can trigger immediate release, but the time to untie knots, etc would take too long and he’d have to use his strength to break them. That doesn’t interest him. Pin him down because he lets you overpower him? That’s sexier anyway.

O = Oral (preference in giving or receiving, skill, etc.)

Armand loves giving oral! He is enthusiastic and talented. Not only does he get completely engrossed in the act, he likes to use it to overstim his partners if they really enjoy oral. He likes receiving as well, but is usually less focused on his on enjoyment than that of his partner. In light of that, if his partner is submissive or just enjoys giving, he will happily receive.

P = Pace (are they fast and rough? slow and sensual? etc.)

Like most things, this depends on the mood/vibe of the situation, but Armand is typically slow and sensual if he’s in charge. However, slow and sensual doesn’t exclude rough this alphabet is from a template so I wanted to point that out. Whether he’s in charge or not, fast and hard can be a lot of fun for him, but maybe likes that best when he’s submissive.

Q = Quickie (their opinions on quickies, how often, etc.)

Armand loves spontaneity in his sex life. Anywhere, anytime. But if the quickie turns into something more, that’s fine by him. He likes to flirt and imply, goading his partner into initiating the quickie even if he won’t initiate himself. He especially enjoys quickies as a surprise. He doesn’t mind if it’s in public or private, quickies are fun and add interest to his sex life.

R = Risk (are they game to experiment? do they take risks? etc.)

So many. He likes trying new things with people. He enjoys pushing his boundaries and helping others push theirs (with consent). If he doesn’t enjoy it he won’t do it again. He definitely enjoys acts that are taboo or unconventional because he’s beyond such human notions at this point. Excitement is difficult to experience after 500 years. He’s not a thrill-seeker in general, but he does like novel and experimental sexual exploits.

S = Stamina (how many rounds can they go for? how long do they last?)

Forever. I headcanon vampires as having a short refractory period and Armand is no exception. If he is turned on by his partner he is turned on and insatiable. He’s rarely pushy (though he can seem needy), but he will always be ready when they are. He is motivated by his partner’s pleasure so if he finishes first he will bound back quickly to satisfy them. It’s not a stretch to imagine him going all night with very little downtime if he paces himself. Can his partner handle it though?

T = Toys (do they own toys? do they use them? on a partner or themselves?)

Armand doesn’t own that many, but he enjoys using them when his partner does. He would happily use them on his partners if they wished, delighting in pleasing them. There is a shyness about him that might make him reluctant to have toys used on himself by a partner since that requires an amount of attention that can make him uncomfortable. He quickly relaxes and gets past this with the right partner/circumstance and can enjoy the occasional toy.

U = Unfair (how much they like to tease)

He isn’t a fan of physical teasing (like edging), but loves to flirt. Drawing out the pleasure for his partner or himself is fun for him, but rarely to the point of it being uncomfortable. All of his flirting is used to heighten what will happen later on, so teasing once that has begun doesn’t serve him. He wants his partner to feel good.

V = Volume (how loud they are, what sounds they make, etc.)

Armand is very quiet. Sighs, moans, small groans are his love language. Whispering a command/consent or encouragement or his partner’s name in his silky voice is enough for him. He doesn’t need to be loud or overly vocal to let his partner know how he feels, but he can’t help but moan and praise. He’s not going to scream your name, but he will let you know when you’re being good for him or taking him so well.

W = Wild card (a random headcanon for the character)

He is obsessed with touch/physical affection as validation. He needs to be perceived as desirable and having his partners touch him in any affectionate way is crucial to him. (Even if that affection comes from D/s or CNC.) He needs affirmation that he's beautiful and wanted.

X = X-ray (let's see what's going on under those clothes)

See gif above. Also, he’s uncircumcised. He has a very proper and polite cock.* It’s as beautiful as he is. It’s not terribly long (maybe 6-6.5 inches/15-16.5 cm) but has a nice girth. Did I mention it’s beautiful? Fairly even in tone with a head the color of his fingertips. Let’s not neglect his balls, though. They are small-ish and tight, accentuating his overall length. Very prim and polite as well.

Y = Yearning (how high is their sex drive?)

This completely depends on his partner and their moods. He can be insatiable to the point of neediness if he’s enamored with his partner. If they aren’t upset with him, his libido is genuine and turned up to 11. If they show the slightest bit of disapproval he has a tendency to use sex to manipulate them and gain their approval/affection.

Z = Zzz (how quickly they fall asleep afterwards)

As I mentioned in A, he will be energetic after if it was a fun, quick, light-hearted event. But if it was an intense scene or emotionally heavy, Armand will be drowsy and relaxed after providing/receiving the appropriate aftercare. Unless it was very close to dawn he probably wouldn’t get incredibly sleepy, but he would definitely be chill and calm after.

Note: yes, some of these headcanons/traits are a result of his trauma, if you feel compelled to point that out, go for it, but please don’t assume I wasn’t aware of which are poor coping mechanisms and maladaptive as I wrote them. I didn’t invent him, I’m just obsessed.

*Thank you Stephen King for that term. Polite, college boy cock is one of my favorite descriptions.

This is the alphabet template I used.

[dilfdater420]

cecil fluff alphabet 🤔

I didn't mention this the last time you requested, but by the universe are your images funny I love them.

As always, thank you for requesting!

#dilfdater420 : answering asks! Cecil Stedman fluff headcanons through the alphabet. maybe sweet enough to rot your teeth? this is formatted as if you're dating/married to him. gender neutral reader. "___" used in place of y/n. may be a little OOC, i'm sorry! not beta read we die like... you know who...

A - Affirmation

Cecil works day and night, 24/7 for the safety of the human race and Earth. At times, it can feel like you're getting in the way, taking time away from what is more important.

However, Cecil would rather die than let you feel this way. He'd let you know that you're just as, if not more important to him than his job. You're his only break in the day, something positive amidst the chaos. It's integral to him.

B - Bald

He's balding, all stress related too. After someone at work pointed it out, he confided in his now lowkey insecurity about it. You try to tell him that it's not a big deal, and he looks fine, but he can't help but think about it at least a little.

You telling him he still looks fine as a mug makes him feel better though.

I have a feeling Cecil would use it as a way to get compliments and affection from you without outright saying it. He's old, old guys love to avoid being completely transparent with their needs.

C - Chicken

I have a headcanon that he's from the south, specifically Kentucky, so he absolutely loves his chicken (and food in general) well seasoned. He can't have it any other way or he will throw a fit. And if that does happen, it's super funny to see him hangry. He'd have his signature frown, a bib he clipped to his dress shirt, a glare at the food, and his arms crossed.

D - Down (to Earth)

Cecil is a very practical man, taking things in as they come. He's always working pro-actively, never waiting for something else to come and lead him in the right direction.

This bleeds over to you. When you both were starting to date, the way he got a first date was not by flowers and nervousness, he was very blunt about it: "Hey, I'm going to say this outright because life is too precious to hesitate: I like you. I think you like me too. Can I take you to dinner?"

It definitely doesn't work for everyone.

E - Elated

When he gets happy, it's noticeable. His smile reaches up to his eyes, and he loosens up. In fact, him being delighted can make him tired since he's stopped tensing up. It's like the weight of the world is lifted off his shoulders, which is more literal than figurative.

In particular, say it's Valentine's Day. You're both at home in the living room, and you're giving each other your gifts. You'd already given him his gift, and you're currently opening the one he's given you. Before you can even tell him how much you love it, he's passed out on the couch.

F - Faithful

Is very committed to you and only you.

One of my personal headcanons is that Cecil loves love and values the close relationships he has with others more than the other party might understand (i.e. Cecil bringing Donald back from the dead).

So, say there's a scenario where you might feel a little insecure that you're away from him so often and that he might be cheating--he'd swiftly nip that misconception in the bud. It'd be a very serious conversation with hard boundaries on that being set.

He'd never forsake you, his whole heart, for momentary pleasure.

G - Gentle

Yes, he's practical and blunt, this was the case back in the letter D, but that doesn't mean he's not considerate with it. He'd treat you like a gentleman.

Him being upfront (most of the time, we'll get into that) means he cares, not that he has a lack of tact. Like if you two were shopping and you were modeling outfits you might want to buy, and he didn't like any of the ones you tried on, he'll tell you he doesn't like it. Not like "I don't like any of these, you should try on some other clothes." It'd be like, "Sorry ___, to be honest, I don't like any of the ones you've showed me so far. I feel like they don't really fit you, can we go look for some other ones?"

H - Hard-Headed

He's very stubborn. When he's stuck in his ways, he's very unmoving in that viewpoint.

Once something clicks, it clicks forever until there's some situation when he's forced to re-evaluate his ideas, which doesn't come often.

With you, he's a similar way. It can lead to some strong discussions on outdated opinions on the world that shouldn't be held anymore. Nothing serious like human rights or something, just little stupid stuff like the Monopoly Man definitely having a monocle or how he won't even try Wingstop because, "Kentucky Fried Chicken is the best".

Compromise is only made when his hand is forced.

I - Icy

Sometimes Cecil can be quite cold.

He thinks in a calculated nuance at work, and it's hard for him to relax that part of him sometimes when he's with you. He tries but the man is stressed out! Having the whole world under the care of you and your annoying heroes is a lot.

J - Jazz

He loves music, and I have a strong feeling that jazz (and country but that's not at the forefront) is a genre he's been accustomed to since childhood in the south.

Since he's a boomer, I could see him being born in the midst of the boom, which would be the 1950's. This era was characterized with a shift to rock and roll through the lens of things like rhythm and blues, i.e. jazz.

Since the (white) south was y'know, not cool with black music (which is rock and roll) they listened to the thing they just got accustomed to: jazz. And he loves that shit

I feel like he'd have a little dream of being like the big wigs and going to a jazz bar in NYC, surrounded by alcohol, love, and sweet tunes. He'd take you there as a treat one evening, and it would be grand.

K - Kiss

I headcanon that he was a bit of a player back in the day, not a lot though. Like he didn't have a revolving door of people every day, but maybe about 10 partners a year? (He could've also went undercover for operations that might've gotten a little freaky, but I digress. Would love to talk more about this full length if anyone's interested.)

So to that respect, he knows how to kiss, and how to do it well. His style of smooching changed as he got older, he got more tender, less cocky. But that same passion permeates through his kisses.

L - Lazy

He hates lazy, relaxing is hard for him. It was frowned upon to lounge around when he was a kid (southerner on a FARM? trifling...), and it's even more frowned upon now in his line of work. He's always doing something whenever he is home, whether it's tidying you both's room, washing the dishes, doing the laundry, etc.

Even with all the money he has he refuses to hire someone.

M - Money

Speaking of money, Cecil's dough is so large that he probably doesn't know what to do with it. Every time he teleports it's over 7 billion, and he couldn't care less! He teleports all the time!

In your relationship, you don't even have to work for a day in your life. He provides everything! And working is frowned upon anyway, because it could allow people to find your relationship out and use it against him.

For the readers that might want to do more than be a house spouse (/are like Debbie), you and Cecil would have to find a workaround that doesn't include a public establishment with easily broken records. Perhaps the government? But even they're flimsy. Regardless, despite his hatred of compromises, you both would find a way that worked.

Also, depending on if he even let you know what his real job was or not, he'd still be acting in the same way. He'd just go about you working in different ways.

N - Nocturnal

His sleep schedule is probably incredibly off from where it should be. He lives on melatonin and caffeine. This can make for some long nights where he wants to talk to you before the melatonin kicks in, and you're hanging to consciousness for dear life so you can listen.

O - Oblique

Whenever Cecil discusses his work, it's very vague.

Depending on if he tells you what he actually does or not, because I feel like he could do either or, he's the same.

He doesn't want his work life to bleed into his normal one. Something that brings him peace shouldn't be tainted with chaos. He loves you dearly, but his world wouldn't, so he saves you from it as much as he can.

P - Petnames

Since he's a southerner, "darlin'" is most definitely his favorite. You make his real self come out, the one not polished to be "professional" and lack his accent.

His runner up? Love. He loves love, so he should call you what he loves.

And finally, his third favorite has got to be hun and hunny--I just have a feeling.

Q - Quality-Time

His time with you is precious, considering he doesn't get much.

It's become one of his core values in life, so he cherishes whatever he can get with you at any time.

R - Romance

Yes, he loves you, but is he the smooth, romantic type? No.

In fact, he might fumble a little whenever he tries to do that. This could look like surprising you to a night of champagne and a trail of flowers leading to the living room more often than Valentine's, but that isn't his style.

But if you liked it, he'd at least make an effort. That's the type of "romantic" he is.

S - Snuggles

In the sterile world Cecil works in, and the touchy world he'd grown up in, he'd be a touch loving man. In fact, with the right amount of whiskey, he might see you laying down someplace and jump on top of you for a hug like the "oh boy it's smooching time!" Link and Zelda animated scene.

Here's the clip for reference: https://youtu.be/zPAo6mW3WYE?si=ZXziBHDO5Vd6IoIX

T - Timeless

When he loves someone, he loves like there is no tomorrow. With the reality of his world often being bleak, and with the amount of time he gets to see you, whenever he does see you, his love is very purposeful and full.

U - Unspoken

His communication skills only activate in things he deems truly serious. But when it comes to "little things" like his emotions or stress, it's something that goes unspoken.

It takes a lot for him to really open up.

To put it in perspective, he calls therapists "shrinks".

V - Vacation

He can't have a vacation; it'd just be a hibernation where he catches up on the years' worth of sleep he hasn't gotten. And that's if he's with you, since you make him elated.

W - Warmth

He grew up in the south, he loves warmth. But up working in the Pentagon can get cold, and he absolutely hates it.

This can look like Cecil snuggling up when Mark was doing his training in the artic.

So as soon as he gets home in the winter months, he's turning up the temperature and you can't do anything to change his mind. Your sauna is his normal.

X - XOXO

Sometimes he'll have to leave for work in the middle of the night, so he'll leave you a note in the kitchen for you to read.

Somewhere along the track of his life, he learned that you put XOXO under your letters without learning how that makes him sound.

Depending on the reader, you might not have the heart to tell him that doing that makes him sound like a little girl writing her first crush a note.

Y - Yearning

When he's not with you he thinks about you and wants to be with you. He wants to know what you're doing, shoot you a text, get a picture back maybe? He just wants you.

Z - Zephyr

Last but not least, he loves walks in the outdoors. Feeling a nice soft breeze to carry some of the sweat away with his love is his kryptonite. It always reminds him of what's important, of what he's protecting.

You, the answer is always you.

a / n : heyyy

I am always open to critiscm especially since it's my first time doing something like this. Not too confident but, I'm being honest with how I see his character and I think that some of that can resonate with my fellow Cecil enjoyers.

On that note, lemme know if you liked it. I also have a huge fear and pet peeve with OOC-ness, so please, help me out! lol

Anyways, thank you, and lemme know if you want me to elaborate on my ideas with any of the letters. My thoughts have been shortened down to little bite-sized pieces for this post.