#this was for a D&G related thing | Explore Tumblr Posts and Blogs

emblazons · 2 years

Text

Thinking about how people who only (or primarily) understand Mike’s arc through a “hes queer and coming to accept it / struggling with heteronormativity/will get his happy ending when he gets with Will” lens are missing at least half of what defines his arc in the wider context / themes of the show.

Forewarning: long post (& also maybe an unpopular opinion)

Even as a queer person myself, I know that his arc isn’t solely about embracing his queerness (though it’s inherently interlinked). In Mike, you have a character who is being radically challenged by both external circumstances and his own decisions through a journey away from all kinds of forced conformity (social, familial, romantic & heteronormative) and into someone self actualized enough to live how they want…while also being strong enough to accept that they made mistakes along the way. Someone who is learning to be brave enough to say “this is who I am, what I enjoy, and what/who I love…and while it took me a lot of time to figure it out, now I can exist in the world embracing that even though it will take consistently resisting the tendency to accommodate people who think it’s unacceptable.”

Like. Even from a time before puberty (see: S3) Mike wants a life that stands apart from what’s expected of him in every area, not just in choosing a romantic relationship with another guy. He wants to continue to be a nerd and “child at heart” even though something else is repeatedly demanded of him by everyone from his parents to El in his romantic relationship. He wants to be a writer and someone who takes those nerdy interests into his adult life (cue aggressive gesturing toward the duffers themselves) and grates against all that’s been constructed for him even when he’s not (yet) brave enough to challenge it directly. Mike liking boys/loving Will is just “the final nail in the coffin” of his social and societal nonconformity—not the first (or the last) aspect of what makes him different from Hawkins or the life he was made to believe would suit him best.

Even the fact that Mike has a desire to be “normal” comes from an insecurity and fear that choosing what he truly wants will lead to him being outcasted and losing the people he cares for entirely—which is partially motivated by his queerness yes, but that also has a basis in his general interests and personality…which becomes especially obvious when you realize we are repeatedly shown that he is punished/has his wishes ignored in all areas he doesn’t conform, even long before we get into a plot where it’s clearer he likes boys.

We see it in how his parents have already started to demand he put boundaries on the time he spends playing his “childhood games” the very first scene of season one, how they demand social acceptable emotions from him when Will is missing, and how Karen & Ted want him to give up toys in S2 when he’s showing signs of depression (because they think the issue is him growing up, not that he’s struggling with loss or guilt for what happened to El).

We see it in how his own father comments about taking his CA trip away from him after calling Hellfire being a group for “dropouts” in S4 (implying that he is failing on an academic and social level that matters to wheelers—and that Nancy is good at).

We even see it in the way everyone from his bullies to his own girlfriend threaten and take things away from him when he doesn’t conform to social expectations...from Troy telling him to jump off the cliff to save Dustin in S1 (as punishment for the one time Mike stands up for himself in the gymnasium) to El jumping straight into breaking up with him and spying on him when he doesn’t do exactly what she wants him to in Season 3.

All of these moments are critical to understanding Mike as a person because they show us that, even without addressing his queerness, Mike’s desire to conform to socialized expectations involves but is not solely about him moving out of heteronormativity—it’s about him moving against everything that WASP, patriarchal, heteronormative and capitalistic and performative “wholesome American” values…and how he is learning to move past the fear of what will happen if he steps outside the lines in general, even though he already knows he hates those standards.

Mike’s “coming of age” arc is about finding the strength to choose the “path less traveled” in all areas of his life—even when it means (potentially) losing the support of the people he cares about. It’s about starting from a place of privilege and becoming okay with being outcasted from it in a way your insecurities never let you be before (which is inherently different than Will, who has always been shown to have some kind of support not just for his queerness but his artistic endeavors as well). Mike’s lack of support is why he starts from a place of deep insecurity, yes—but it’s also why him learning power of choosing to be himself, even if it means “losing” people when he’s honest about who (& what) he is will be universally powerful.

You don’t need to be queer to understand the power of what it means to know you will be okay even if people leave you. You don’t need to be queer to understand the power of stepping outside social expectations or your family’s way of raising you. You don’t even need to be queer to understand the weight of breaking up with someone you were only with to satisfy what you thought you should do, rather than be with who you want to.

The power of being strong enough to overcome your insecurities in order to “step out of line” and live and love as you want to is universal, and a stunningly brave choice no matter what or why you chose to do so. The fact that Will will be there waiting to love him in that honesty with himself is beautiful, yes—but it’s not the only lesson to be learned for Mike’s character.

Mike starting out with everything the world (or, at least America) tells would make you happy, realizing he is not happy with those things and rejecting them knowing it might have consequences is what makes his arc powerful, because he is learning (exactly like his sister Nancy) to be brave enough to accept those consequences (which for him are getting dumped, and feeling like he’s being left behind by some of his friends) to follow his own heart.

Even though The Duffers aren’t writing this into a tragic ending (aka: he’s not going to die or be left alone, because the duffers writing is inherently designed ro champion the outcast), these are the things that have (and will) make him relatable even to an audience that doesn’t know queerness. Erasing the fact that his lesson is the bravery it takes to follow your heart solely to talk about him liking guys (even Will) is to undermine his humanity, and the lessons to be learned from him by even the most general an audience.

TL:DR - the heteronormative aspect of Mike’s character is not the sole or even inherent issue within Mike, though heteronormativity is inherently built into his struggle.

There are deep dives on how his arc is also about a war against toxic patriarchy, toxic masculinity, emphasis on capitalistic and academic accomplishments over artistic ones, and even conformist relationships (whether they’re queer or not) that should be explored for his character—and I for one like him too much not to move out of just “this boy is queer because xyz” and into “let’s talk about Mike in terms of the wider scope of his cultural context and upbringing.” 🤷🏽‍♀️😂

#imma go watch the Oscars now but #i know people mean NO HARM in focusing on the heteronormative part of his arc because on tumblr esp that is inherently relatable but #it’s not the only thing that makes his character interesting!#and it’s not the only thing he’s struggling with in his ‘coming of age!’#understanding white masculinity in America on a wider scale is SUPER helpful to understanding Mike #and in that sense Reddit is actually pretty good at catching his drift—THEY JUST DONT REALIZE THE DUFFERS ARE U N D E R M I N I N G it #erasing Mike’s queerness is to do him a disservice. I absolutely believe this.#but to deny every other part of him that isn’t just expected to be straight is to oversimplify him aggressively #you need BOTH to understand him #which is why you need both El and Will to make sense of his struggle lmao #(I still 100% believe he’s gay not bi)#(but him dating a girl was necessary to make sense of understanding that aspect of socialized expectations).#ANYWAY. Sorry for the rant lmao #mike wheeler core #mike wheeler #my st commentary #byler #< target audience #stranger things

378 notes · View notes

majorasnightmare · 1 year

Text

Inevitable Gerudo Headcanon Posting

i spend too much time thinking about the gerudo like genuinely theyre one of my favorite recurring tribes in the zelda series, which as we all know is a form of suffering because god forbid nintendo stop relying on racist tropes and caricatures.

keeping in line with this nintendos portrayal of the gerudo tends to either be 1) why theyre bad, and/or 2) how a culture of all women has kids. like thats an oversimplification of ALLL the problems present in the gerudos portrayal but thats a different post for another time. in general i bring this up because it means, for me as well as any others interested and invested un the gerudo, that there is a kind of generalized lack of pre botw characterization or cultural concepts to work with, esp when compared to the other tribes of hyrule. (looks pointedly at how theres no gerudo in the gerudo desert but there is a prison slash execution site where their king was held. LOOKS AT WHO SURVIVED THE PROLOGUE CUTSCENE IN WINDWAKER)

ANYWAYS. botw was really fun because, while it had plenty of its own issues with the gerudo, they were at least non hostile! so with that in mind, the headcanons and worldbuilding i write primarily apply to the wilds era gerudo, which spans the timeframe between ganondorfs reign as king to totk (suspending disbelief because that timeframe is. by all accounts. longer than recorded human history. friendly reminder ganondorf does All That before we even get sheikah wifi towers. christ.)

anyways. second verse same as the first, core assumptions and then a readmore

Some core assumptions:

The BotW branch of the timeline is chronologically set AFTER the previous timeline, ie the events of ToTKs ancient past is set AFTER the last event of the Hyrule Historia timeline. essentially they all come back together to form one line that makes up ToTKs ancient era

The biggest effect on Hyrules topography was the flooding in Wind Waker. after an unknown point, the flooding ocean receded leaving behind the ruins of ancient Hyrule. at some point after that, the zonai settled parts of it and made the buildings wed see as ruins by the time of BotW. slowly the various tribes of hyrule immigrated back

all peoples within the setting of hyrule are loosely grouped into categories called tribes. in this sense, tribe refers a collection of peoples with shared traits, without anything concretely set in stone (for example, hyrule includes the tribe of hylians, the tribe of gorons, the tribe of koroks, etc etc). the main six who show up repeatedly can be considered the sage tribes (gerudo, hylian, sheikah, rito, goron, zora), and the various types of enemies can be considered the monster tribes (the blin tribe of bokoblin, moblin, bulblin, etc)

so. starting at the beginning. near entirely headcanons

in ocarina of time, we see the spirit temple, where Nabooru awakens as a sage. this temple features a MASSIVE statue of a woman adorned with a snake and its primary mechanic centers around mirrors and reflected light. while the mirrors return, we dont really get that same kind of implied spiritual/religious focus again. so instead im going to make a mountain out of a molehill and position her as the primary spiritual figure here. im running low on name ideas tho so suggestions are much appreciated. for right now ill refer to her as the serpent goddess

the gerudo are culturally a people of function over form, practicality over whimsy, but when circumstances allow for it, are drawn like any other to arts and music and decoration. they have a long history of bloody, brutal battle, and while the war has long since ended, its kings buried and its warriors naught but ghosts, the desert remembers. its sands haunted by the bloodstains of conflict past, and echoes of ancient tragedies. the gerudo here in the era of wilds may have lost their records of their ancient history of conflict, but some aspects, preserved by the sands, have managed to survive the onslaught of time

surviving all this time is the ancient creation myth of the gerudo people. as legend tells it, long ago in the time before myth, there existed a goddess whos power was transformation. she was possessed of two forms, one a proud humanoid figure, the other a striking serpentine form twisting through the heavens with ease, her scales glittering with mirror sheen. to shift from serpent to human, she would shed her skin, and grow it back again to embrace her serpentine form anew

seven times she shed her skin, and from these shed skins rose the first gerudo, each embodying a key aspect of their sacred mother. the serpent goddess's scales are each a nascent soul of a gerudo, and when those scales are shed and fall to the land below, a new gerudo is born. likewise, when a gerudo dies, their soul returns to the scales of the serpent goddess, to await until they would descend again and reincarnate once more. the seven daughters of the serpent goddess led these gerudo as their guardians, leaders, and protectors. but, away from the seven heroines and their new people, the goddess shed her skin an eighth time. this daughter was born alone, and while her sisters embodies the strengths of spirit, flight, endurance, knowledge, motion, skill, and gentleness, the eighth was born with insatiable wanderlust. learning of this, the seven sisters cursed her name for leaving them and their people behind, and despite their shared ancestry, the eighth was forbidden to be spoken of. this suited her just fine, and the eighth was free to walk the land and learn all of its hidden paths

in time, war came to the gerudo, as it often does. though they were united, and strong, they were a small collection of people, and thus despite their proficiency were threatened nonetheless. it became clear at last that they could not stand and fight, and that to survive, they could not remain in place for long. but the enemy had pushed them deep into their home, and knew all the paths back. as hope seemed lost, as if summoned by call, the eighth sister at last wandered home. calling her seven sisters to her, she proclaimed that every hidden step was known to her, and while she lacked the power to guide them on her own, together they would escape unseen into the night, their enemy none the wiser. thus, skillfully guiding the skills of her sisters, the eighth heroine led the gerudo into safety, and the seven were humbled from their pettiness. seeking to apologize to the sister they had banished and forgotten, the seven sought to make amends, but the eighth was content merely to have a place of remembrance among them. to wander is not a sin, as long as one remembers where their home lies.

the eight heroines have long since passed and returned to their mothers scales, but the virtues they embody are cherished by the gerudo family they left behind, seeking to hold their memory close even as the years wear on

to the gerudo was bestowed the blessing of the element of Spirit, embodied by their iron wills and manifesting as crackling lightning. this spirit lightning is the gerudo's will made tangible, arcing out towards their target as an extension of their focus and sheer determination. to a gerudo, nothing is impossible until one has devoted themselves entirely to it, giving it their all, and only then may it be conceded

a long history of persecution has resulted in the gerudo being increasingly insular and isolationist. their admiration of the art of combat and how it can bring forth an individuals talents, achieving a perfect harmony between body and will as the weapon became an extension of ones limbs, was often perceived as aggression by outsiders, who would react as if to defend their own interests. the gerudo have suffered much at the hands of hyrule at large, and have pulled further and further away.

as the gerudo pulled away from hyrule, and hyrule from them, they devoted most of their attention to themselves. cooperation amongst themselves is seen as paramount to their survival, and familial affection often extends well past ones blood relations.

the gerudo value family, and loyalty, alongside independence and cooperation. everyone should have the opportunity to pursue their goals, but if someone is struggling, it is the responsibility of everyone to help. children are raised by as many people as are available, and even in the times of monarchy, the palace was less a formal dwelling place belonging to the gerudo ruler and more a public forum that the ruler simply happened to live in

most of the palaces amenities are fully public, a tradition that has carried on to riju's time. meals are communal and the kitchens open to all, and the palace has no strictly dedicated servants, merely a collection of amenities the gerudo people are free to use at will and often do so together. what this means is that there is no servant, for example, dedicated to preparing riju's meals but instead a collection of people willing to cook and willing to eat making meals riju partakes in, and this applies to most other menial tasks as well. the throne room is where the leader of the gerudo engages in their job as public servant, attending to the needs of the gerudo at large and responding to crises as they arise.

as nintendo is keen to point out, the gerudo are a people that are predominantly "all women", and thus spends plenty of time going over dialogue wherein people wonder how they have children and including a plethora of sidequests in the wilds era about acquiring partners. im ignoring all of that and instead going by lizard rules, in part because here theyre descended from a serpent dragon goddess, wherein a population of all female lizards were able to successfully maintain a stable population and have children without major issue. gerudo like ganondorf are the equivalent of a rare genetic mutation that flips some other genes on and has a different result, that really doesnt affect anything besides this one kid and doesnt have any major effects or differences in their life. two gerudo are perfectly capable of having kids together, having relationships as usual, and on the topic of "how do the gerudo have kids", thats all i really feel like exploring that topic

with an insular, isolationist culture that appeared for all intents and purposes to be all women, the gerudo were often a source of major culture shock when interacting with the other tribes of hyrule, most notably hylians

bonus hylian lore: hylians experience an even greater lack of sexual dimorphism than irl humans do, so gender presentation is near exclusively presentation based, with a heavy emphasis on clothing. showing skin is considered an act of emotional intimacy, and most hylians opt to cover as much as they can. the intensity of presentation scales upwards with their role in society, with the royal family having the most extreme form of gender presentation. gender is presented through clothing style and hair length, with ornamentation, jewelry, and piercings serving as a kind of intensifier, and hylian culture at large tends to operate on a sliding scale of masculine to feminine, with the middle androgynous zone being a weird gender spot for them

the gerudo, by contrast, never really developed a concept of masculinity versus femininity. gender pronouns in gerudo are based on personal proximity, occupation in society, and familiarity. these barely translate at all into hyrulean.

as the gerudo, by circumstance or by choice, interacted with hylians and the tribes of hyrule more and more often, some kind of understanding had to be reached with regards to translation. as relations were already terse, making an attempt to fully translate the gerudos understanding of gender to your average hylian was considered a fools errand, and thus translation was done in broad strokes, giving hylians the simplest root form of gender pronouns (and none of the increasingly specific declensions). loosely, the term vai is closer in concept to "us" and voe is closer to "not us" "foreigner" "outsider", and has taken on a connotation of " forbidden" or "taboo" (leading to wilds era gerudo secret clubs often imploying translatable Adult Puns regarding their catering to voe and the overall titillating atmosphere they tend to put on for customers). with regards to hylians, the feminine princesses and queens had more in common with the gerudo and were thus "vai", but the masculine kings and soldiers, who were often the main figures pushing aggressive efforts into conquering or otherwise absorbing the gerudo into hyrule, were "voe". this was then distributed in various guides to understanding the gerudo language as " vai" meaning "woman" and "voe" meaning man

gerudo town, as the capital of their people and general hub, has a law banning the entrance of voe. at the time if its writing, this was a fairly obvious law, because most "people who are forbidden" are forbidden from entering. as time has passed, hostilities cooled, and relations warmed, this law has been the subject of a long struggle of interpretation. it doesnt translate well into nearly any other language, and thus who counts as "voe" and "vai" is subject to endless debate. the differences in gender perception are most clearly on display with the admittance of the gorons. one might assume that the gorons, being a monogendered people who typically use masculine terms of identity and endearment in hyrulean, to thus qualify as voe, but the gorons cooperative nature, near uniform monogendered culture, and emphasis on hard work and independence has enough in common with your average gerudo that considering them as vai is a no brainer

ganondorf thus is also, clearly, considered vai. the specific pronouns he uses in his native gerudo include declensions regarding his position as royalty (one that has since gone out of use and is fairly archaic now, only really being used as a kind of neo-pronoun by current era gerudo as a rebellious self identification thing), his relation as the only child of koume and kotake, and are conjugated based on relation between the speaker and him. in the ancient era, calling ganondorf voe would be so confusing as to not even read as an insult. if one really wanted to refer to ganondorf with a tone of insult, theyd substitute the declension of familiarity with one used for strangers

ganondorf achieved his position as king the old fashioned way: a gift from his moms. ancient era gerudo practiced typical monarchy with a line of succession, and koume and kotake named him as the next royal of the gerudo as their heir. the hyruleans, seeing a masculine gerudo of royal birth, referred to him as "king", and correcting a culture of people he had little respect for was just a waste of ganondorfs time. after ganondorfs sealing, the gerudo changed to the current system of chiefs, wherein the current chief names a successor, or by default passes it onto their living heir. a system is in place to democratically install a new chief if the current one passes without naming a child their heir, or naming a successor in their place, a system drafted and then used in ganondorfs absence. riju thus inherited the mantle from her mother, but could opt instead to force a vote, or have such a vote forced on her due to her age, leading to much of her insecurity seen in BotW. this system has proven to be relatively stable, especially coupled with the continued tradition of keeping the palace an open public forum

the first chief of the gerudo was nabooru, advised by the sage of lightning we see in totk, following ganondorfs sealing

the gerudo are very familiar with the souls of the dead. poes, souls lost and aimless, wander the desert after millennia of bloodshed. thus their funerary customs have persisted, even as the folklore behind them fades in and out of memory.

a person perceives reality through their body. they know the sky is above them both by craning their neck up, and by the sensation of ground beneath them. in death, one is bodiless, and sensation becomes a confusing, directionless onslaught. it is so easy for a spirit to become lost, unable to orient themselves. the gerudos funerary rites seeks to aid these souls in their journey towards returning to the serpent goddess, as without guidance they are liable to become poes. the body after death is merely an empty receptacle, and on a practical level is a potential draw for dangerous desert scavengers seeking an easy meal. the shifting sands and hard soil makes burial difficult to impossible, so instead the gerudo burn their dead. smoke is ephemeral and thus able to be seen by spirits, and even as the wind rushes, smoke will still travel upwards towards the heavens. a spirit will linger by its body for a time, and thus cremation helps provide guidance to the dead. unable to feel the earth beneath them, the dead can follow the trails of smoke to orient themselves upwards, and dispel lingering confusion

as the body is burned both to guide the departed's soul and to ward away scavengers, the gerudo inter their belongings into gravesites instead, usually one or a small collection of items that the deceased valued or were considered emblematic of them. having a proud history of warriors, many gerudo consider their weapons extensions of themselves, and thus many gravesites will consist of a single weapon.

the sage of lightnings temple served as the primary gravesite for many gerudo, and in its heyday was decorated with love and care as befitting its role. torches burned bright in its sconces and the walls painted with care in massive sweeping murals. here in the temple, a foreigners idea of the gerudo as austere and practical would fall away, as the halls shone with warmth and color, taken from their desert home

lost souls that become poes often end up becoming consumed by their regrets and despair at their inability to find their way back to reincarnation through the serpent goddess's scales, and from there turn to rage and aggression. the sunlight glinting off of the goddess's mirror scales will blind and disorient the dead who have lost their way, as they try in vain to rely on their half forgotten senses, and thus poes eschew the day in favor of the cover of night. though incorporeal, poes move as fast as the desert winds, and try all they can to cause mischief and havoc. usually the end result of their shenanigans is light injuries and scratches, but it isn't uncommon for a waylaid traveller or adrenaline seeking youngster to suffer fatal consequences. despite this, poe hunting tends to be the go-to act of rebellion for antsy teenagers with a taste for danger. in general, one of the only things fast enough to strike a poe is a fired arrow

as the sands grew and the desert expanded, it grew more and more difficult for the steeds of the gerudo to gallop across the dunes, and they were driven further and further back until the gerudo phased out their horseback traditions entirely

and as an AU specific trivia tidbit

after ganondorf's sealing, nabooru grieved the loss of her childhood friend by constructing a dedicated tomb to house ganondorf's gravesite. even though he wouldn't die, nabooru would never live to see him again, and in traditional gerudo fashion, his gravesite is marked by his signature trident, further imbued by nabooru's blessing of lighting (in a similar fashion to urbosa's fury, despite urbosa not being a sage).

#totk headcanons #totk spoilers #loz gerudo #gerudo #ganondorf #totk au #loz headcanons #i THINK thats all the relevant ones #god i hope the readmore works. guess ill find out #BUT ALSO. GANONDORF NEOPRONOUNS REAL IN MY HEART. HES VAI. HES AN INCREDIBLY NICHE AND ARCHAIC FORM OF VAI #THAT HIGHKEY ISNT EVEN RELEVANT ANYMORE. biographies about him confuse+anger gerudo scholars because translating his pronouns is a BITCH #it also makes riju removing the voe restriction more impactful imo because its a symbol of how far the gerudo have come-#-in their relations to hyrule. because the voe rule is almost entirely like. a no hyrule thing snfnsndhdbf #so hyrule finally like! not being so much of a threat that the gerudo feel they have to stay closed off! going from oppressor to ally!#LET IT MEAN SOMETHING NINTENDO G O D #anyways. ganondorfs so gender.#nvm got the readmore to work c:#loz totk

76 notes · View notes

deus-ex-mona · 2 months

Text

my five surviving braincells when something remotely good happens:

#in other news… wORK IS OVER PARTY!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!#man. i’m s o tired. i can’t believe i survived almost 2 whole years at this job…#huh. come to think of it… i started tling idol sengen before i even got this job lol. and i’m only 3/5 of the way through it…#can’t believe the idol sengen grind->hiatus->grind(?) outlives my time at [withheld] company…#i did end up spending a cool 20 mins cleaning out my work locker though. i found so many treasures i didn’t even know i had in there #like. there was an unopened 3-pack of wet tissues a n d an unopened box of pens that i don’t recall buying #and ofc the 3 random sponges i ‘liberated’ from the lab. don’t tell my boss lmao #w a i t now that i think about it i should’ve taken at least 1 vial of (allegedly) carcinogenic sand for the memories. dammit.#oh well. what’s done is done i suppose. i did receive way more chocolate than i could ever eat though…#y. yeah. i guess i’ll miss my coworkers (a little). they were fun to annoy every day. except for the new guy bc i don’t like him at all lol #i have never met someone who lacked as much common sense as he. i think he’s gonna get canned before he’s able to resign on his own terms #dude could be spoonfed through every single step of the testing process and *still* mess up somewhere smh #but no. this isn’t about him. even though he is the final straw that led to my decision to resign #hm. looking back on it now. i think i was pretty good at my job for the most part when it came to the things i could do #or maybe i was too good at it. like. to the point where even more experienced analysts were coming to me in search of help #prolly gonna miss being one of the very best (out of like a grand total of 10 people at the lab) at doing ftir-related tests #ehehehehehehe i wonder if that workstation will continue to stay as organised as it is now that i’m gone #a n d i wonder what my coworkers will do now that they can’t ask me for ms excel help for the smallest of things lol #sometimes i just wanna tell them to g o g o o g l e i t ! ! ! when they call me over for it. but alas.#can’t believe these guys know how to use c h a t g p t and not ms excel (despite having it on their resume) smh #omg wow this got long and incoherent sorry guys i think i need some sleep lol. idol sengen next week..#…maybe…? no promises though!!!!!

11 notes · View notes

shalom-iamcominghome · 11 months

Text

Whenever people talk about heaven not being the goal, but the goal being to bring pieces of g-d and heaven down to earth, I completely agree, but in my head, I imagine that g-d is a stubborn cat and I am trying to pick Him up to put him in his carrier and His claws are deep in the carpet

#jumblr #jewish conversion #jew by choice #personal thoughts tag #heaven is a place on earth is honestly the song i think of HELP #and honestly i always hated the idea that heaven is the Final Goal in xianity like #'this world doesn't matter as long as you have heaven to look forward to!' made me so angry before i left #seeing people talk about how much they looked forward to dying and going to heaven especially made me feel weird #because i'm chronically suicidal (and it was weird that i was treated weird for that while saying you look forward to heaven isn't?)#anyway... this was another thing that pushed me to judaism and i talked about it before but i love it #i gave up trying to conceptualize g-d in the grand way because it feels really isolating and harder to imagine for me #so imagining g-d as a cat in this instance makes it much easier to relate to as a human with cats who act Like That

19 notes · View notes

sliced-orange · 2 years

Text

He go squish! :D

Don’t worry, he’s not hurt!

73 notes · View notes

koushirouizumi · 3 months

Text

Shaman King (Japanese version) ~ {Filler} Episode #49 + Y O H & M A N T A on F a u s t + Y O H & M A N T A (Interactions)

"...I g u e s s this is what {they} call 'T R A U M A'." - R y u; (speaking the word in clear English)

{Cap'd by Me} / @koushirouizumi/hikari-m {DO NOT R E P O S T} {DO NOT C O P Y} {DO NOT R E P R O D U C E WITHOUT MY P E R M I S S I O N} (Please A S K to Use!) {L I K E S O. K.}

[This is a Shaman King Positivity post!] {+Manta Positivity Post} (Please be respectful Interacting)

[DO NOT Tag with featured Character{s}/Series negativity, thank you!]

#yohta #c: manta #c: yoh #c: ryu #koushirouizumi cap #koushirouizumi sk #koushirouizumi sk cap #mankin spoilers #(Not really h E R E B u t {I left a line out but might add bit more later})#(o K OK THIS LITTLE BIT WAS i NTERESTING TO r EWATCH {though its a complete F i l l e r ep but *related back to c ANON* For O n c e}...)#({The moment directly before it is very t R OLLL scene for the viewer but basically using the a NIMATION TO t ROLL BOTH mANTA+VIEWER Y up})#(Inuko's acting is Wonderful here tho BC YES even for '''f ILLERTM''' you can h EAR it in Inuko's voice)#({First the sheer p ANIC response then the p ANTING {A n x i e t y} then Mantas barely there s UPERs o f t c RY i n g})#(O. G. a n i m e too handles 'it' all very d IFFERENTLY {includin in this ep} But {things it did b ETTER than R e b o o t n EGL})#({OK BUT THIS WAS i NTERESTING} r YU {R YU?!??} USES ' T R A U M A' IN CLEAR e MPHASIZED *e NG* {I f ORGOT h E a CTUALLY USES IT...})#({'O K AT LEAST ONE EARLY 2 0 0 0'S a NIME k NOWS THE w ORD +IN E N G????' M E})#({ n O T E TO t O E I !!!!!})#({ ' YEAH I THINK WE ALL k NEW WHAT WAS GOIN ON p OST 'THAT' f IGHT ' - Everyone who actually p AID ..... a TTENTION})#({I BOTH WANT TO S I G H A LOT @ O. G!Y O H HERE BUT ALSO} {Y O H TOO IS WONDERFUL})#(e DIT: SOYEA this one apparently a IRED... J UN... '02 not THAT long after '02 ended hUH {ALSO IT *HAS* r OMI PARK IN *YES* idk if she})#({heard this scene but might have seen ep after since r EN IS... IN... It kindof at beginning???})

2 notes · View notes

lesbianstarlightglimmer · 1 year

Text

Just recalled a memory from elementary school that made me realize I really did just have ocd from a young age

#meows #or I’d assume these things would count?#like I distinctly remember on several occasions #being in line for gym or music class and looking at the line of classmates #ahead of me and my brain saying ‘slap all of them’#or ‘kiss all of them’ and then I’d have the other voice that’d be #like what??? no!?? I would be hurting them/doing something they don’t want!!!#also related to my ✨religious trauma✨#if I didn’t say my nightly prayers the exact same way every night #then my family would die lol. and if I wasn’t #doing the family prayer thing I was subjected to as a child #and was on my own I had the same thing as above #PLUS having to hold my breath the entire time #anxiety probably plays into it #that reminds me fuck my third grade teacher I think she truly #started my anxiety. I also cheated on tests a few times in there #damn okay I need to go to sleep and. not. think about this….#oh and I think I thought a lot of the ‘god’ telling #me if I didn’t pray a certain order/way g-d would strike my #family down was actually probably my anxiety and ocd

6 notes · View notes

omotelie · 17 days

Text

WHERE’S MY FUKING CAPO

#my post #funny #relatable #guitar #music #bjork #wait you can only have 30 tags the joke is much less funny if i don’t have a fucking wall of the stuff i guess i’ll just make this one reall #and 140 characters per tag this is stifling my creativity meh i was running out of popular tags anyway bjork’s not that popular of a tag tho #tbh i was running out of inspiration after like the 4 tag this joke was not meant to be at least not by my hand and i guess it wasn’t that f #unny either i cooled down real fast on that one you know what i’m pivoting this is no longer popular tags just my train of thought for as lo #ng as i feel like it the first few one might not even make sense when i’m done but who cares not me clearly it is quite annoying how i can’t #use commas tho make’s this harder to read than it needs to any way i lost my capo for like the third time my desk isn’t even that messy but #don’t know where else i would’ve put it it’s not lying on any of my instruments either i probably put it quote somewhere i would remember un #quote but clearly i didn’t i’m usually very good at remembering where i put things put the capo is the zone in between i use this often and #i use this every other year so i never remember where it is stored it is 1 am so i guess i’m going to bed soon anyway but still this is goin #g to annoy me until tomorrow i don’t even need it right i’ve had to remove so many tags the original joke barely makes sense anymore i’m kee #ping bjork tho you can pry her out of my cold dead hands not that i really listen to her music or know her i just like saying her name i’ts #got good mouth feel and it’s fun to spell i didn’t realize how long filling 30 tags would be what’s 140 times 30 let me look it up 4200 this #makes this post my biggest project by like 3000 words the only time i’ve written any meaningful lengths of texts was in college and i’m a dr #opout what 4200 characters not words silly little me makes a lot more sense now that i think about it i’m getting tired of writing so this m #ay end soon i would like to not go to bed at 4 am for a silly little post 2 people are going to read plus i am running out of ideas of thing #s to write i am very much not a writer writing scares me even writing lyrics for songs terrifies me i’ve only manage to write lyrics for one #without getting too self conscious and imploding but i’m better at writing songs with vocals i’ve never had anyone to write music with and w #ithout the ability to sing or write lyrics it’s been difficult the singing has been more or less remedied with synth v but the puter can’t w #rite lyrics for meso until i get a lyricist friend i will have to toughen up you can’t make art without making yourself known to those who c #onsume it but lyrics and poetry has always been 1 step too far for me tbh i’d rather spontaneously combust rather than let people know me i #do not look at my very numerous in stars and time posts and reblogs they are completely unrelated to this don’t think about it oh look behin #d you there’s a distraction oh you’ve missed it i have been writing this for half an hour and i am getting so sick of it i revealed informat #ion about the inner machinations of my mind i have not done this since last time i saw a therapist 5 years ago this is fucked up what a self #impose writing challenge can do to you luckily this is the last tag i’m doing lucky me well this was fun this is going to end suddenly so do

0 notes

girlhelpicf · 9 months

Text

the cabinet of riches directly correlates to the mental break i had in 2021 where i thought ghosts appeared to me in reflections

1 note · View note

talkfastcal · 1 year

Text

Something

#d*sney dr*amlight #< this is related to that game but I don’t want it in the main tag because it involves some of my personal experiences #I just find it very interesting how alike the forgotten and I are LMDKDJD #like she was a very angry child because she had to grow up and people betrayed her trust #like damn me too ! twins!#m*ther g*thel lied to her and betrayed her trust and then when the forgotten found out she was like ‘oh what are you so sad about.-#it’s for your own good!’#the forgotten was heartbroken that someone would betray her and take advantage of her trust like that #and I’ve had similar situations happen (not like that ofc because this is a game and no one locked me in a tower) but still #and then my character now having to go talk to their inner child (the forgotten) about how they don’t have to grow up fully #like you have to do some adult things but you have to remind yourself that you can play you can pretend you can have joy in life #and basically saying ‘I’m sorry this person betrayed you but. look at everyone here who love and care about you’#really made me think #like that’s basically what I’m doing with myself rn and my trauma healing journey in therapy #like I’m just like…..wait a minute is this fucking play about this LMFJDJF #is that how the line goes idk I don’t watch that show #but DAMN I sat there shocked after all of that like…wow twins #does this make sense idk #no one cares kristen #adding on: seeing this damn scenario play out on FATHERS DAY OF ALL DAYS LMFKFJF #guess who took advantage of my trust I’ll give you one guess

0 notes

ruthlesslistener · 2 months

Text

Okay having now seen Jurassic Park in full I can say:

a.) Everybody telling me not to bring back the dinosaurs because they're dangerous is full of shit, all these animals are attacking people because they are VASTLY underfed and understimulated. The entire movie was the animals toying with them bc they were bored and likely hungry, not because carnivores just...do that. The entire animal care team and handling was a goddamn disaster. C-

b.) The geneticists were fucking stupid, who the FUCK would patch AMPHIBIAN DNA into REPTILES, they're as distantly related to them as amphibians are to us!! Use bird DNA!! Or DNA from other reptiles! Fuck!!!

c.) On the same note, whoever thought to use all female dinosaurs was huffing paint thinners bc fucking. DAMN IT. PARTHINOGENISIS IS A THING IN REPTILES. YOU DONT EVEN NEED FANCY AMPHIBIAN DNA FOR THAT I AM RATTLING THEIR GENETICISTS BY THE SCRUFF OF THE NECK WITH MY TEETH ARE YOU ALL FUCKING IDIOTS

d.) The lysine contingency plan wouldn't have worked as a useful failsafe because it would have taken too long for the animals to run out of lysine to halt their metabolisms- the killswitch idea is excellent tho and is a legit tactic used for transgenic organisms so A+ for them implimenting that there. I don't exactly have an alternative method either bc I'm not good with metabolism, I just know that depriving them of lysine would likely be bullshit

e.) All the kill scenes were waaay too censored and way less people died than I thought :( major salt to my dad for not letting me watching this as a kid because it would be 'too scary' or 'make me violent' bc this shit was a letdown for how tame it was. Still a good movie but very much not a horror movie

f.) This is an outstanding movie about the hubris of man but I see now why people would think that the moral of the story is 'playing god and bringing back dinosaurs bad' when its really 'billionares are fucking idiots and should trust a wide variety of scientists'. Hammond chose a bunch of fucking idiots to help run his park and trying to monetize living creatures is never a good thing. This is why peer review exists!! This is why its important!!!

g.) this film reminded me that i will never see a living non-avian dinosaur irl and i am sad :(

#jurassic park #thank god my roomies appreciate my bullshit bc i was shouting at the screen the whole time #(pos)#I DID LIKE THE MOVIE I JUST HSVE COMPLAINTS AS A GUY IN THIS FIELD

1K notes · View notes

ebbarights · 2 years

Text

#this is a really unpopular take so will only be putting it in the tags #it pisses me off how in fandom no two characters can ever just be friends they have to be dating #this isn't about how everything is gay i'm a fan of that but can't people be gay and also be friends with other people #like g**d *mens meant so much to me because *ziraphale and *rowley are really fucking good friends they literally postponed the apocalypse #with the power of their friendship!! they were never supposed to like each other but they do!! they enjoy spending time together!!#they go to cafes together!!#but no they have to be fucking otherwise their relationship is meaningless #trust me i looove shipping characters it's so fun! but when it becomes omnipresent in a fandom it's unbearable #same thing with str*nger things i have read the odd st*ddie fanfic but those guys talked to each other for like. ten minutes total #and now it's the most popular pairing in all of str*nger things #and honestly (this is kind of the part that's the most unpopular) i don't looove that w*ll is gay #i know that's canon and no longer a complaint about fandom but. he was so fucking relatable in season 3 #why does nobody want to play dnd anymore? why does everybody run off to date people?#i know he definitely wasn't intentionally aroace coded but he read that way to me and now if i tell someone i'm homophobic #and taking representation away #(not a competition but in all of the lgbt+ community u know who's really starving for representation. cis white gay men)#same thing with jo march!! that bitch is aroace! and your lesbian headcanon is fine but so is mine!#sorry i'm Going Through It today #.me

0 notes

deus-ex-mona · 7 months

Text

s. s ave me, meoto…

#n o t me clinging to meoto to retain my sanity bc g o o d l o r d today was the worst #today was truly a very bad; very horrible day indeeeeeeed #man. today truly was a comedic tragedy in every way possible. i’d laugh if i were anyone else tbh #first i couldn’t start my workstation bc we were out of this cleaning acid thing.#t h e n this other branch lab sent over a precise amount of [reagent] that we needed to make the cleaning acid thing #*and* what’s worse was that they also demanded like. 1/5 of the acid we mixed. like bro. make it yourself mans.#but the worst part was when i tried to use a dropper to poke this sediment out of [tube i was supposed to be cleaning]#bUT THEN HALF OF THE DROPPER MELTED BC THAT BUGGER CAN’T HANDLE HIGH TEMPERATURES AAAAAAAAAAAAAA #stupid new droppers man. the old droppers could handle 100 degrees just fine. s o now the tube is clogged with melted plastic and it’s just.#life’s *really* great sometimes yk~~~~? (ʘ‿ʘ)#and so the night shift dude who came to take over the workstation against expectations seemed kinda pissed that i hadn’t started anything #and im just there. with my intestines wriggling about like internal abdominal worms. tryin not to cry in the face of my mistake.#while he’s fumin’ away like a freakin’ chimney or sth. like. man. no one asked you to take this workstation. you came here on your own. :(#anyway i ditched him and left for my break to calm myself down only to be approached by some random terribly lost middle aged to old lady #who was looking for directions to *somewhere* but she only spoke chinese aaaaaaaa #and i can’t read maps/i don’t even live in the area of my workplace so i have no idea if the lady managed to make it safely #but. lol. the lady showed me her message screen when she asked me for directions to her destination #and by pure coincidence the person she was texting is apparently related to someone with the same first name as me #the cons and cons of having common names man. i hope the lady managed to find her friend with the same name as me though lol #anyways. pls hw im begging. pls drop the crossfade for lxl birthday tmr i n e e d more meoto to carry on—#s o b s this is what im living for now ig. meoto………..

7 notes · View notes

rainystarshower · 2 months

Text

SFW Alphabet with Aventurine

.⋆｡⋆˚｡⋆｡˚｡⋆. .⋆｡⋆˚｡⋆｡˚｡⋆.

chara : Aventurine

cw : possible OOC, grammar mistakes, fluff, gn reader, not proofread

a/n : Oh dear, it’s been far too long since I’ve made something for this page 😅

.⋆｡⋆˚｡⋆｡˚｡⋆. .⋆｡⋆˚｡⋆｡˚｡⋆.

-ˋˏ✄┈┈┈┈┈✩┈┈┈┈┈𝄞

A — How they show affection 𝄞≛

For Aventurine, it’ll take time for him to really open up to you. But when he does, he’s very affectionate. He’ll appear out of nowhere — instantly snuggling against you, holding you tight like you’d turn into ashes the second he let go. He spoils you rotten! Even if you try to decline, he’ll sneak it somewhere in your room or bag <3

B — How they are as a bestie 𝄞≛

The only best friend ever!! Aventurine wants to know everything if you two gossip!! If you have quite the limited information and he’s especially invested in whatever you told him, he’ll secretly dig into it more and tell you all about it! He’ll always share the best news from the IPC with you — unless it potentially puts your life in harm

C — How they cuddle 𝄞≛

Cuddles with Aventurine make you feel like he’s on his last breath. He may not seem like it, but when you two are dating or really close, he’ll always be asking to cuddle. He holds you, like you’re something so fragile. He’ll randomly latch himself onto you and never let go!

D — A domestic life with them 𝄞≛

On days when he’s tired, he’ll try to help out with anything the best he can. On days when you’re tired, he takes care of everything; no matter what it is! Though, if you’re both tired? He’ll snuggle up to you, watching whatever you two feel like watching whilst eating fast food. The both of you eventually drifting into slumber in each other’s arms

E — Ending the relationship 𝄞≛

He’d be sour about it. No matter who ended it, he’ll still be upset. Every little thing he does, reminds him of you. Even if he tries to brush it off and bury this reminder of you — it almost feels impossible. For someone he was so vulnerable with, to be gone, out of his grasp is a pain unexplainable.

F — How do they feel committing with you being their fiancé(e) 𝄞≛

He’s all in! Maybe he’ll feel a bit hesitant, worried and scared for the future that could bestow him, or possibly not being good enough in committing, but you, oh you... Your presence soothes him, making him feel comfortable and ready for whatever hurdle may appear as your fiancé or more. He’s ready to dedicated so much to you, as well as his commitment for something so big <3

G — How gentle are they with you 𝄞≛

Very gentle. Even during days he’s in a foul mood, he’ll try to remain gentle with you. Even if you really manage to piss him off, he’ll be upset, but in the end he’ll try and make it up by being tender and sweet with you. For you, the effort would definitely be worth it.

H — Do they like hugs 𝄞≛

At first, no. He’ll flinch and back away, trying to mask how uncomfortable he is with a smile. Though as your relationship develops, you find him hugging you more than you hug him! He loves everything related to you, especially hugs!!

I — How long does it take for them to say ‘I love you’ 𝄞≛

It takes a while. It takes almost everything in him to say it, even if it’s an empty ‘I love you.’

But be patient, wait for him. He’ll love you like no other, constantly reminding you of it in different forms because words can be quite hard. Mustering up the courage to really, genuinely, say ‘I love you’ is rare for him. But it will definitely happen. Take it slow

J — How are they when jealous 𝄞≛

He’s quite petty about it! Oh and hurt... He’ll tell you “Oh, why not ask them to do it for you?” Or if somebody’s flirting with you, he’ll wrap himself around you from behind, purposely calling you the world’s cringe petnames, hoping whoever is flirting with you will take the hint!! When he’s being petty, he’ll eventually break, asking you directly who that person was. He refuses to let go of you until he’s relaxed

K — How do they like kissing 𝄞≛

Aventurine’s kisses with you are tender, sweet and gentle. I like to think of his emotional kisses. Where he pours out his whole heart into his kisses. He gives you pecks here and there whenever he thinks you look handsome, cute, pretty, beautiful — which is almost all the time! Kisses gave him much more meaning after meeting you. Now he’ll practically start whining the entire day if you refuse to kiss him!

L — How good are they with little ones 𝄞≛

Have you seen the way he treats his younger self?! If you have any younger siblings, he’d spoil them beyond rotten just as he does with you. He’s really good with little kids. Some might feel a bit nervous at first around him, but they warm up quickly as Aventurine tells them his PG (?) stories. Perhaps even showing them the cool things he has on him, magic tricks, or anything really. He’s quite patient with them too!!

M — How are your mornings with them 𝄞≛

I’ll admit, mornings aren’t entirely the best with him. Half the chance is you’ll wake up from Aventurine on the call from the IPC, and he’s normally up and at it before you are. On times he’s not disturbed by work, he’s rather cuddly and refuses to get up. He will also not let you get up either. He wants to stay in bed with you forever!

N — How are your nights with them 𝄞≛

Nights are much better than mornings. He always tries to come home early, back to your presence. He gets nightmares most the time, so help him out the second you notice. He’s also cuddly at night but he’s a light sleeper. The slightest creak could jerk him awake, so be extra quiet when you sleep with him!!

O — How open are they with you 𝄞≛

He’s actually really open even if he shows hesitancy in it. He feels guilty for it, but he can’t help it. He tries his hardest to be as open as he can be with his feelings about you or anything for that matter. When he learns how much you truly care, he might end up getting a bit emotional <3

P — How patient are they with you 𝄞≛

He’s very patient. Or so, he tries. With you, as I’ve said, he’ll always make the effort. He’ll wait for you, even it bores him in the meanwhile. As long as you’ll be alright, he’ll be alright. Same is the other way around, you need to be really patient with him too, alright?

Q — Quizz them to know how much do they remember about you 𝄞≛

Everything. Every detail down to the bone. The only stuff this guy would forget would probably be how much money he has left! Even if he finds himself in a muddle, unable to remember something about you, he nails it with his guesses which relief him

R — What’s their favourite moment in their relationship that they remember 𝄞≛

(This is something I think everybody has reallyyyyy different opinions on) I think it’d be the first time he cried in your arms... Sure he was vulnerable during the time and embarrassed about it afterwards, but it’s a memory etched into him. The way you accepted his cries, comforting him, making your scent the scent of ‘home’, ‘security’, and ‘comfort’ to him... Also any of the times you’ve made or bought him something !

S — How secure — protective are they of you 𝄞≛

Protective enough, but if anything happens, of course he’ll be upset. He might dwell on it, but he’ll trust you not to harm yourself again. He’s very protective if he notices anybody glaring at you in a not-so-friendly-way. He’ll run background checks on anybody who harms you and let’s them know that the next time you’re harmed because of them, they’ll have to grovel at your feet for mercy

T — How hard do they try for their relationship 𝄞≛

He tries his hardest. After all, you’re not just some fling to him. You’re somebody he cherishes more than anything, really. He’ll try and try, he’ll keep trying for your sake

U — What’s an ugly, bad habit of theirs 𝄞≛

He has a very... Unpleasant habit of making you worry like crazy, even unintentionally. Sometimes, when he’s so swept up in work, he’ll forget to tell you how busy he’ll be for so and so. He makes up for it when he sees how panicked you were with a dinner and whatever else you’d like!

V — (Vanity) How insecure are they 𝄞≛

He’ll be quite insecure about his eyes no matter what, even if he’s improving slowly. Or maybe he’ll be insecure about some other part of himself, to which he doesn’t confide in anybody with. Although, you take matters into your own hands, reassuring him, comforting him. You make him feel like maybe his insecurity isn’t so bad...

W — Would they feel incomplete — not whole, without you 𝄞≛

Absolutely. With a far developed relationship like yours with him, he’ll most definitely feel unimaginably incomplete without you. He, himself doesn’t understand at first why he feels like something’s missing — though he’s quick to catch on that it’s you. You’re what’s missing and, it kills him. He needs to be with you again, so he can feel whole. Not Aventurine, but Kakavasha.

X — Xtra headcanon 𝄞≛

Cried when you called him ‘Kakavasha’. Your honeyed tone, so tender and sweet... It strikes him in the heart. He really loves you. As well as his cat cakes!

Y — What’s in their list of ‘Yuck!’ things 𝄞≛

He doesn’t like ‘boring’ people. He prefers when people have a little extreme in them, or a rather odd characteristic that makes them stand out differently. He doesn’t like dirty people either. In both ways, personality and literal dirty! If you’re physically dirty due to health issues, he’ll help you out. Otherwise if you’re plain lazy, he won’t appreciate that. Nor does he appreciate people who try to ‘cheat’ during fair and honest gambles. It irks him.

Z — How do they zzz 𝄞≛

Sleeps like a baby!! Even if he wakes up due to any small sound, in his deep slumber, he’s just spread himself all over the bed like a starfish. One of you will end up waking up on the floor one day, that’s for sure. He easily feels when your presence is gone, making him curl up in his sleep, but when he feels you, he’s all starfish again!

#˗ˏˋ ꒰ Rei writes ꒱ ˎˊ˗#honkai star rail #honkai star rail x reader #honkai star rail x you #hsr #hsr x reader #hsr x you #hsr aventurine #aventurine hsr #aventurine #aventurine fluff #aventurine x reader #aventurine x you #aventurine x gn reader #hsr fluff #aaaaa my cutie!!!!#omg i need to write for him again hes so cute fr😭

352 notes · View notes