#this was an issue with AMA’s too
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If you don’t have time to televise actual awards at an awards show you’ve got too many performers
#this was an issue with AMA’s too#it’s not just a music event it’s the video music AWARDS#I know the small ones are often announced pre show but even the biggest awards of the night they aren’t announcing
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MC: Hey-
MC: Can I talk to you about something?
Baxter: Of course...?
MC: But, not as my boyfriend- Like a best friend!
Baxter: OH! I see now!
Baxter: ahem
Baxter: 𝒴𝑜𝓊 𝑔𝑜𝓉 𝓉𝒽𝒾𝓈 𝑔𝒾𝓇𝓁𝒻𝓇𝒾𝑒𝓃𝒹~
MC: oh my god- QwQ
Baxter: 𝑅𝑒𝓂𝑒𝓂𝒷𝑒𝓇:
Baxter: ✨𝑀𝑒𝓃 𝒶𝒾𝓃'𝓉 𝓈𝒽𝒾𝓉✨
#our life beginning and always#our life#olba#olba baxter alexander ward#olba baxter ward#olba baxter#olba mc#olba baxter ward x mc#olba baxter x mc#baxter x mc#baxter ward x mc#our life fake quotes#our life incorrect quotes#ama thoughts#baxter is a theater brat through and through#FIGHT ME ON THIS ONE#I DARE YOU#he got the sass#he got the drip#what more do you want??#whatever it is he prolly has that too#except mommy and daddy issues
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I def didn't resonate with Dawntrail at all but I can't help but fiddle with ideas and stuff that were presented in the expansion. I started a brief conceptual rewrite but part of me is kinda :/ about showing it because I know there's been a lot of knee-jerk responses to any DT criticism. Obviously some of the DT crit stems from bad faith arguments but I do think the expac legit had issues, though primarily in execution.
Maybe one day when the topic is less spicy, I'll consider sharing the notes. I just don't want people to argue tbh, it's so silly. You like what you like and you don't like what you don't like, it can just be that simple. Despite me not enjoying its MSQ, I'm super glad to see I wasn't alone in that and that others are having fun!
#ama rambles#and before anyone accuses me of being a wuk lamat hater first of all how dare u that is my DAUGHTER and i LOVE HER#my issues are more complex and nuanced with the expac but don't wanna dive too deep rn#anyways we love wuk lamat here
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Hi!! What are ur Thoughts on lady Featherton character in Bridgerton and on season three Bridgerton in general?
Hey! Lady Featherington is a fave, actually, haha. I do really enjoy Violet as the other mother we see the most of, but I've always preferred women characters with a little more grit and gristle to them, which Portia has in spades.
She's a survivor through and through, and I love that sense that she clawed her way up social ranks in a cruel and loveless marriage only to have to do it all over again after her husband left her and their daughters in financial ruin. She barrels forwards for both her daughters' security and her own, and that really does it for me, character-wise. Plus Polly Walker is probably one of, if not the best actress on the show tbh.
And I enjoyed season 3! Penelope and Colin were really sweet, and I love that in many ways Penelope got three love stories - a romantic one in Colin, a platonic one in Eloise, and a familial one with her mother. It really underlined the theme of the show of Penelope blossoming, but also of her being able to step out as her full self, which means embracing all these parts of herself beyond her romance - her career, her friendships, and her family, who often embarrasses her. I like that it really leant into her not just being understood, but deepening her understanding of those around her.
My biggest issue was with Cressida Cowper's storyline. I actually talked about it in the tags on this post, but I really think Penelope should've given her the money and that Cressida should've gotten out. It would've been a kinder ending for Cressida, yes, but also a more fulfulling one for ending Penelope's arc as the anonymous Lady Whistledown.
I'm basically just going to repeat my tags here, haha, but look - Whistledown gave Penelope power, freedom and escape, and while she used that to hold people accontable (sometimes), she also used it to gossip and exert influence over others. Whistledown had the power to make others feel powerless, and she did use it that way - gosh, we saw that with Marina, but also the competing off-screen modiste who she seemingly ruined in order to buy Delacroix's silence.
If Penelope had used the money she'd earned off other women's stories to actually give that power, freedom and escape to another woman - a woman she understandably doesn't like! - would show real growth of character and a meaningful evolution to Penelope's power as a writer. Plus it would be a nice sort of commentary on powerless women pulling other women up behind them once they come into power.
So yes. I still enjoyed the season, but I thought that was a misstep.
#the pacing was a mess too but i think that's been a consistent issue across all three seasons tbh#my current ranking of seasons would be 2 - 3 - 1#oh i quite liked violet's little love story too it was cute they had nice chemistry#bridgerton#cressida cowper#penelope featherington#welcome to my ama#bridgerton asks
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This isn't on the ask game, but what's the most recent dream you had you can remember?
I don’t really dream a lot or at least, I often don’t remember them. The ones that do stick in my mind are the nightmares 🙃
tw: vague nightmare description
—
I’m actually on medication for nightmares (and sleeping) now, so they’re much less frequent but the last one I remember was basically an exaggerated version of an argument I had from back when I was living at home.
it didn’t end so well, and I couldn’t wake myself up.
#lol I have sleep issues#can’t sleep#don’t sleep#insomnia#or I sleep too much#no inbetween#dreams#sprinkled with a little bit of trauma#it’s okay#I sleep a bit better these days#but it was shit for a while there#nathara is active? what.#ask game#nathara actually answers#ask me anything#ama
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Relax, I've Got You
Summary: Reader isn't the best at handling stress, and her roommate Spencer, notices. Luckily, he has quite a few salacious ideas on how he could make her feel better.
Couple: Spencer Reid/Fem!Reader
Category: Smut
Content Warning: friends-with-benefits situation, oral (f!recieving), fingering (f!recieving), mentions of anxiety/symptoms of anxiety.
Word Count: 2.7 k
Masterlist
You were never good at handling stress.
You were well aware of this facet of your psyche– the way tensity would often wind around your limbs, snaking into the very depths of your bones until you were entirely drained and devoid of peace, a shell of the person you were accustomed to being.
You had dealt with this complication on your own for the most part. You’d come home after a long day, and attempt to find yourself again through chamomile tea, lavender mists, and a warm blanket.
Of course, there were days where even these measures could not suffice in curing your weariness.
That’s where Spencer Reid came in.
He’d only been your roommate at first. With the economy going as it was, it was simply more practical to find one, rather than renting alone. He’d responded to an ad you’d put up, and you accepted. The process was easy, honestly. You had no qualms about sharing your living space with another person, and even found the arrangement enjoyable at times. Spencer was well-mannered, never missed rent, and wasn’t even at home most of the time. When he was, he was quiet. Sweet.
Through time, you found yourself becoming friends with the man. The conversation was light and easy, and in a rare turn of events, you started to open up to him. Even more surprisingly, he returned the favor, adding to the understanding that was fast growing between the two of you. It seemed only natural, since both of you were made naturally vulnerable by the circumstances of your situation. You’d come to your apartment, drop the mask of the day, and see that Spencer was already there, becoming an extension of the solace you found at home. Soon enough, the comfort of your couch was simply synonymous to him as well.
It didn’t take long for Spencer to notice the anxieties that would plague you when a deadline came about, or when you simply fixated on an issue for too long. The way your bedroom light wouldn’t shut until 4 AM, or how you’d pace in the kitchen, so wired that your body denied you the rest you so desperately needed. He noticed the dark circles, the occasional irritability (followed by an apology, of course), the headaches, everything. Which is why he thought nothing of it to suggest some remedies for your troubles over breakfast one day.
“Caffeine can actually increase stress, if you weren’t aware.” He says, eyeing your second cup of coffee that morning. “There’s actually a large amount of data that indicates you should limit caffeine intake, especially if you’re already anxious.”
You narrow your eyes, furrowing your brows slightly. “Says who?” You retort, not quite ready to give up your chosen beverage.
“The NIH, Penn State, the AMA-”
“Okay, okay. Sorry. I got it.” You interrupt, knowing you’d started a losing battle the moment you’d questioned him. “I’ll try to cut down on it.”
He grins, satisfied with how the interaction had played out. You, on the other hand, started to drift farther away from your current setting. You swallow, putting down your coffee cup before rubbing your eyes, a soft sigh escaping you.
“Something wrong?” Spencer asks, cautiously, his voice soft.
You tsk, shaking your head and shrugging a bit at your own dilemma. “It's just.. I’m already so tired. I’m exhausted and the day’s barely begun.” You pause, unable to articulate just how fatigued you were. “It’s like I can already feel the mid-afternoon headache I’m going to get later, and it hasn’t even started yet.” You hate the way you sound, longing for the day you could fully relax for even a fraction of a second.
“You’d probably be a lot less tired if you slept a little more.” Spencer suggests, and you shoot him a death glare.
“Don’t you think I know that?” You snap. “I’m trying. It’s not that easy. It’s just-” You groan, stopping yourself as the quick realization dawns on you that you’ve misdirected your frustrations. There’s a wave of shame rising up almost immediately, heating your cheeks up in regret.
“I’m sorry, Spencer. Sorry. That’s unfair of me. I know you’re just looking out for me.” You murmur, taking a deep breath to calm your senses.
“Hey, don’t worry.” He says, his voice low and compassionate. “I get it. I know you’ve got a lot on your plate right now.”
You nod, closing your eyes as you continue to breathe. He continues to speak, his voice remaining warmhearted.
“There are actually quite a few ways to alleviate stress. Some experts recommend meditation, exercise and yoga. I wouldn’t mind doing those with you, if you were interested.” He offers, as he continues to ramble, lost in his own explanation in the hopes of being of service to you. “Some experts even name sex as a useful stress reliever, due to the endorphins and oxytocin released after completion.”
You give a fruitless laugh. “Jesus, I wish. I don’t have the time to try and find someone willing to do that for me.”
Spencer goes quiet, and you finally open your eyes. You’re met with his stare, trained on your form, a thoughtful expression on his face.
“What?” You ask, upon returning his gaze.
He clears his throat, shaking his head, as if he was ridding himself of a passing thought. “Nothing. Sorry. I’m sorry. I hope you do find something that works for you though. I hate seeing you like this.”
You soften at his concern. “Thanks, Spencer.” You say, the affection in your voice unmistakable. “Maybe I’ll end up taking on.. Yoga? That seems doable, right?”
He smiles. “Yoga. Right.”
The days pass on, until you find yourself in a similar scenario you’ve been in one too many times. You’re pacing the kitchen, a small clock reading that it was currently 2 AM. You couldn’t even really decipher the source of tonight’s anxiety– all you know is you feel it, and you feel it deeply.
That’s when a voice breaks through the darkness, halting your movements altogether.
“Hey, are you alright?” Spencer’s soft, slightly deeper voice.
“Oh, yeah.” You call out, despite the growing tightness in your chest. “I’m fine. You can go back to sleep. Sorry for waking you.”
He shakes his head, scratching his head as he makes his way towards you. “It’s nothing.” He reassures. “I needed to pee anyway. What’s going on with you?” He inquires, gently.
You rub at your chest, biting your lip. “The usual.”
“Work?” He asks, softly.
You purse your lips. “I’m not even sure at this point. Just really anxious.”
His expression softens. A beat of silence passes between the two of you.
“I’m- um. I’m willing to help.” He stammers out, suddenly seeming much more nervous than he was a moment ago.
You give a dejected smile. “That’s sweet, Spencer, but I dunno. I think I have to deal with this on my own.”
“No, I mean. I can help. I’m willing to help. To do that for you. I’m your friend. I want to help.” He restates, his voice a little urgent.
“Willing to do what?” You ask, wholly confused with where he was going with this.
He takes a breath. “Sex. Or, an orgasm, at least. You said no one you knew would be willing to help you like that. I am. If you want.” He blurts out.
You stand there, momentarily shocked into silence. You’re suddenly able to recall the conversation you’d had, just a few days prior, and realize what he was trying to say. Here you were, in your kitchen, with your friend- your roommate, and he was selflessly offering himself to you. For sex. For de-stressing sex. He sounded so earnest, despite the obvious lewdness of his offer, and the juxtaposition made your head spin.
“I..” You start, your voice caught in your throat.
“You don’t have to feel compelled to say yes. I’m just offering. I want to help you.” He interjects, his voice still carrying that unselfishness you’d known from the very beginning.
“I.. no. I mean, yes. I want to say yes.” You find yourself admitting after a moment. “But.. are you sure? It’s.. I mean, it’s sex, Spencer.” You whisper.
“I’m aware.” He says, matching your softer tone. “I’m okay with that. Are you?”
You take a breath. Looking up at him, you take in his slightly tousled hair illuminated by the soft moonlight that drifted in through your apartment windows. His white sleep shirt was crumpled, and even in the darkness that enveloped you, you could decipher the kindness in his eyes, his mere presence bringing a shade of ease into you as you spoke to him.
“Yes.” You murmur out, the words flowing out with no hesitation. “I’m okay with that.”
“Can I kiss you?” He says, gently, and your nod of affirmation is almost immediate.
He steps closer and cups your cheek, before pressing his lips against yours gently. It’s a sweeter kiss, something that, despite never saying out loud, you would have expected from him. His mouth moves languidly against yours, before pulling away, slightly out of breath.
“Kissing actually helps to reduce cortisol.” He murmurs. “It indirectly lowers stress as a result. Is it working?”
And true to his words, you realized that the tightness in your chest had faded somewhat, no longer blaring with the intensity you had just felt a few minutes prior. An entirely new feeling settled within you- an ache, a need for this man and what he brought to you.
“Yeah. It’s working.” You mumble out.
As if he could read your mind, Spencer gently takes your hand. “Let’s move to the couch, yeah?” He murmurs, already leading you to his spot of preference.
He gently guides you to sit on the couch, quickly finding your lips once again to exchange some soft kisses along the way. His hands drift up and down your back, fingertips light and tender. His every touch speaks to something more, to an unspoken dedication that you’d never felt before until this moment.
To something that maybe extended beyond the original purpose of your rendezvous. “Is this alright?” He asks, his tone hushed and reverent.
You nod, almost in a trance. He was so gentle, so reassuring. He was exactly what you needed.
His lips find yours again and you respond eagerly, letting your hands tangle into the mess of brown hair that sat atop his head. He let out a small groan as your fingers slightly tugged on the strands, sending a thrill through you.
He starts to trail the kisses down your neck, seeking out more sensitive spots that could bring you into a further state of rest and repose. Everything about you spurred him on, it seemed. He paid attention to every noise, every movement– his ultimate goal seeming to hinge on your pleasure throughout this.
Of course, you respond accordingly to the dedication, a soft gasp or whimper escaping you when he would mouth at the perfect spot, which would only cause him to increase his actions tenfold, leading to even more response on your end.
The perfect feedback loop driving you to pliancy and ecstasy all at once.
His lips begin to drift down, and you realize he’s settling in between your legs now, hands on the waistband of your sleep clothes, urging you to lie down completely, which you do.
“Gonna take these off now.” He whispers, looking up at you between your legs.
“Please.” You respond, waiting with bated breath.
He manages to pull down the last barrier between you two, before being met with the mess he’d created. His lips parted as his fingers trailed lightly over your wet slit, your arousal evident on his finger as he marveled on the effect he could have on you.
“Jesus, you’re beautiful.” He whispers, as if his eyes are set upon something precious, something worthy of worship. And in a way, isn’t that exactly what he’d set out to do the moment he’d placed his face between your thighs?
He loops his arms around your thighs, before slowly allowing his tongue to dart out, delicately, tracing the wetness of your pussy. A moan slips out of you, low and needy, and that’s all the confirmation he needs before he’s diving in, devouring your cunt like a man starved.
“Spencer.” You gasp out. You say his name like prayer, like he is god-given, because in this moment, he is.
His tongue traces your clit in circles, before directly placing his lips over the swollen bud, applying some light suction. The tenderness in the action, the way his eyes flit upto yours, watching your gaze for the utmost reassurance that he was doing right by you, only hurdle you closer and closer to your pleasurable end.
It’s almost as if you’re floating, your back arching as his face stubbornly stays buried in your cunt, lapping at your wetness insistently. He wants your release just as bad as you do, and it’s clear he’ll do anything for the sweetness that comes with you falling apart in his arms.
“Oh god.” You moan out- how is it possible to feel so airy, and yet so present all at once? To feel every movement of Spencer’s warm, wet tongue lavishing your clit, and still be somewhere else entirely- a new height of pleasure you had sorely needed all along.
One of his hands leaves the iron-grip it had your thighs in, letting his fingers drift towards your entrance. He slips the digits in, slowly pumping into you, only adding to the overwhelming rapture you found yourself in. Your eyes shoot open, and you find yourself writhing against him.
“Spencer- oh god. Please, please.” You babble out, legs starting to tense with the beginnings of your orgasm.
He only pulls away enough to murmur softly. “That’s it.” His fingers continue their steady pace into you, his grip on your thigh keeping you planted to the mattress. “I got you, love. Come for me.”
With nothing else to say, he resumes eating you out, and the combination of his fingers and mouth finally barrels you towards your orgasm, shuddering as it rips through you, as your every sense is clouded- with this, with him.
It’s only until you’ve ridden out the entirety of your orgasm that he pulls away. Sitting upright, he leans forward to caress your jaw, taking in the rapid rise and fall of your chest, the flushed appearance your face had taken on in the throes of gratification.
“Feeling better?” He asks, softly.
“Entirely.” You whisper back, almost in awe. Not only at how well it worked, but how adoringly he stared at you, it being enough to stop your heart in your chest. Did he always look like this? How did you never notice?
“Can I return the favor?” You implore, already beginning to get up, but Spencer pushes you back down lightly, shaking his head.
“You’re tired.” He says, as if his word was fact, despite these being your feelings that were being spoken about. “Right now, the oxytocin coursing through your body is priming you perfectly for sleep, and God knows you need it.” He chuckles out.
You realize that he’s right, and for the first time, you feel the fatigue that comes naturally with sleep, as opposed to the restless nights you’d been dealing with. You still feel disappointed though, feeling a sting of rejection as you’re unable to touch him back. Still, your tiredness is undeniable, and so you nod.
He gets up, finding a blanket to lay on top of you, before kneeling beside your face. He looks at you with subtle veneration, before letting his lips brush against your forehead.
“I’ll take you up on your offer tomorrow, though, if that’s alright.” He murmurs. “When you’re rested.”
Your smile is immediate. “Deal.” You whisper out.
He looks at you for another beat, before letting his knuckles brush against your cheek, slowly retreating to his bedroom, as to let you get the rest you so desperately needed.
You close your eyes, amazed by the tranquility that came with Spencer. How simple intimacy came with him, as if that’s how it should’ve been all along.
You know you’ll ponder on this fact in greater detail later on, but for now, you relished in serenity of the afterglow.
“Spencer Reid.” You think. “What divine comfort you are.”
HOOOLY SHIT. how long has it been since i uploaded? a long time? i think. hahahaha. in between traveling, [redacted life updates], and even more, i just wasn't very inspired to write. i hope this speaks to some of you, and i hope it was enjoyable to read. as usual, any likes, comments, reblogs are so so so deeply appreciated. feedback as well! thank you so so so much for reading regardless, i am eternally grateful for any and all support <3 (oh also haha. this was written for @imagining-in-the-margins friends with benefits challenge! check it out.)
#spencer reid smut#spencer reid x reader#spencer reid#spencer reid fanfiction#spencer reid fanfic#spencer reid x y/n#spencer reid x you#criminal minds fanfiction#criminal minds self insert#spencer reid imagine#spencer reid self insert#doctor spencer reid#dr spencer reid#spencer reid criminal minds#criminal minds fandom#criminal minds imagine#criminal minds#criminal minds smut#criminal minds fic#criminal minds fanfic#criminal minds x reader#criminal minds x you#spencer reid x self insert
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❝ 𝐊𝐄𝐘𝐒 𝐓𝐎 𝐓𝐇𝐄 𝐊𝐈𝐍𝐆𝐃𝐎𝐌 | 𝐋𝐇𝟒𝟒 ❞
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pairing: sir lewis hamilton x princess of zamunda!reader
summary: after many years, your father has left you to sort your love life out before you have to rule the kingdom. what you didn’t expect was to find love within your father’s favourite sport.
warnings: outfit links, smau, just read 🤭 (sorry for any typos!)
saint’s team radio 🎀: listen, i love ‘coming to america’ just as much as lewis and this being a 3 am thought made me too excited to write it. enjoy it, love ya! 🫵🏽💗
tags: @mauvecherie-writes @httpsserene @exotic-iris13 @motheroffae @purplelewlew @arshiyuh @alika-4466 @non-stop-imagines @hopefulromantic1 @vile-harlot @emjayewrites @yeea-nah @henneseyhoe @saturnville @greedyjudge2
pls like, comment and reblog!
fc: nomzamo mbatha
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palaceofzamunda
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liked by f1, mercedesamgf1 and 574,356 others
palaceofzamunda Her Majesty Princess Y/n will safely depart from Kigali, Rwanda to Montreal, Canada with the rest of the Royal Family for a motorsport event per the King’s request. We wish them safe travels!
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f1 very excited to host the royal family this weekend!
user i hope they will treat our glorious family well as the royalty they are
user princess y/n is so gorgeous
user so glad she gets to be our next queen
user sky sports and f1 have announced their arrival and have hyped it up so much…there’s levels to this kinda thing
user craziest thing is that they never say anything about prince harry or the prince of monaco whenever they’re there 😭
user i wonder which team the king supports
user fun fact our king loves ferrari but his fav drivers are 1644 and ofc other older drivers as well
user he’s just like the rest of us fr 😝
mercedesamgf1 extremely honoured to be hosting the Royal Family of Zamunda in our garage!
user i would risk it all for Princess Y/n
user it would be iconic if Princess Y/n gets together with a driver
user girl wdym, isn’t she married?
user no she isn’t, homegirl is extremely dedicated to her work as a humanitarian and as a country, we’d be surprised if she was romantically involved with anyone 😭
user what a woman
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“Father, were the rose bearers necessary for the trip?” You huffed out, watching as rose petals were being tossed out on the tarmac before your father stepped out on the jet’s stairs.
“You know it is tradition, my child. Now, have you gathered everything before we leave this plane?” Your dad answered, waiting for you, your mother, and your sisters to exit the plane after him.
Holding onto your carry-on, the Canadian air breezed past you as you descended from the plane’s steps and gave the media a polite wave, wanting to get to the comfort of the hotel already. Given the warmest welcome from the airport staff, you and your family safely made your way to the official cars and drove to the Four Seasons.
Upon arrival, another warm welcome was given along with a bunch of staff issued to you at your every call and you did not want to say no as they kindly offered.
Laying down on the incredibly soft bed, you appreciated the aesthetics of your suite and took photos that you knew you couldn’t share with the public due to safety reasons so that just ruined the mood so to bring it up again, you called your royal advisor/childhood friend just to update her on your journey.
“And let me guess, the media was all over you guys.” Ama chuckled through the phone. “When aren’t they ever. A lot of them were from Baba’s thing we’re going to.” You said, rolling your eyes as you recalled the flashing lights from your landing.
“Oh, the formula thing. You’ll be fine, Y/n, just remember to interact with other human beings and don’t bring up work.” Ama spoke, squinting her eyes at you. “Don’t you have faith in me? I’ll be as chilled as I can be.” You said.
“Y/n my dear, should I remind you how you ran away from that one rapper because he wanted to take you out on a date?” She laughed in between her sentences and you wanted to scream in embarrassment. “Ama please, let’s not speak on that, it was enough to scar me for days.”
Holding her hands up, Ama spoke again. “Okay okay, I’m sorry. Look Y/n, I have to go now and I promise i won’t speak on it again.” She laughed once again and you just shook your head at her.
“Bye Ama, say hi to everyone back home for me.” You sighed out.
“Byeee! Don’t forget, listen to sexyy red before you go. She’ll give you confidence.” Ama winked then dropped the call.
Feeling your hunger slowly come back, you ultimately decided to drag your two younger sisters to get dinner with you. You knew the next day was going to be incredibly long so you wanted to do everything early to prepare yourself.
-
You made no effort to research a single thing about the sport that you were going to watch.
Your father had sent staff to hand deliver your passes to each of you, there were only two and had specified that it was from Mercedes. Luckily, they went very well with your outfit choice for qualifying that day.
As for your journey to the track, a clearly nervous Mercedes employee was assigned to you along with all the other members of your family having their own guide. Her first thought was to compliment you and you couldn’t have thanked her enough, with you starting to like the experience.
Sitting in the car was not awkward at all, you had asked several questions about the sport and what exactly was happening so that you would not be confused in the garage. A tour would be put in place before qualifying for your family then you’ll get to meet the drivers however most of the fun stuff will happen on Sunday.
“Tell me, is my skirt too short? I made a bold move with this outfit today.” You asked, the younger girl already shaking her head in disagreement.
“It’s a very cute outfit, Your Majesty. It’s quite unsuspecting unless you’re going to wear a sash.” Maddy joked. “Oh no, we stopped that practice three years ago. Another thing, you don’t have to call me that. Y/n is just fine.” You smiled and you could see her sigh out of relief.
The conversation had went on until you arrived to the paddock gates and quite the crowd had gathered and obviously they had to be for the drivers and other important f1 personnel. Maddy had informed you that you and your family would enter through a much more private entrance to avoid crowds.
As soon as the door was opened, you could hear the loud atmosphere of the track. From fans to the cars, it was buzzing and that had you looking forward to the rest of your trip. Following close behind, you could spot your parents and sisters walking slightly ahead of you and they were admiring the beauty of the scenes behind the sport.
However, the weather did not accommodate your outfit all with goosebumps rising on your skin so quickly. “We’ve got some hoodies in the hospitality.” Maddy reassured with a smile.
After a warm welcome upon arriving at the hospitality and the overly excited team principal had showed you around, you finally received the hoodie and completely unaware of the ‘44’ etched into the material but at least you were now warm.
Your father was at his happiest, over-explaining everything to your curious sisters and your mom was in deep conversations with the barista who was from Zamunda. The paddock club was lively with different people wearing colourful merchandise of their favourite teams and only then did you realize you hadn't seen any driver or their face even though they were planted everywhere.
Before you could pull out your phone to research, Khosi, the youngest, ran up to you whilst laughing. "I made a joke to Baba that you'd find someone here and the face he made was priceless." She wheezed out, plopping down on the couch you were sitting on and lightly smiled at her antics.
Looking over at your father, he couldn’t be more excited, his smile growing larger and larger as the Merc personnel continued speaking. “Toto will be here soon with the drivers and a few photographers from Mercedes. We’ll then head to the garage and pit lane for a tour.”
Without a moment to spare, several people entered the space including photographers, the very eager team principal and what you would assume were the drivers. The taller one walked in with his hands clasped together with a large smile on his face, his style could be described as preppy.
The next driver, however, his presence could be felt with just a step in the doorway. The first thing you noticed about him was his confidence followed by his outfit, a black tracksuit with simple red lines around specific areas. After being mesmerised by each detail about him, you got to his eyes which locked in with yours.
A shiver ran down your spine as the both of you maintained eye contact with each other, a slight smile on his face whilst chewing on some gum and you truly could’ve melted on the spot. “George, Lewis. Meet the royal family of Zamunda. King Akeem and his family have been long time followers of Formula One and we’ve had the honour of hosting them in our team.” Toto expressed, quite literally unable to stand still.
Introductions began and butterflies were flying around your stomach the closer you got to him. You could tell that he was your father’s favourite driver as he spoke for quite a while and even made a few jokes but you couldn’t hear anything, not when the man in the designer tracksuit was staring you down.
“Your Majesty, i’m Lewis. It’s lovely to meet you.” He finally introduced himself to you as you were the last of your family to greet everyone. You held out your hand to him and he gladly accepted it and you prayed that he wouldn’t feel the warmth of your palms. “Likewise,” You cleared your throat. “Y/n is just fine.”
The sound of your name falling from his lips felt like heaven, pronouncing it correctly on the first try just added to the attraction. “It’s a pleasure to meet you, Y/n.” He spoke lowly and you could barely keep yourself together in your head. You wanted to find more words to say to him, anything, but your chance fell short as the eager team principal pulled you out of your head to introduce the next driver to you.
The next few minutes were brutal. Your family stood opposite the faces of the team and you could feel his eyes glued to you, unmoving.
In typical Zamundan fashion, it’s in your father’s blood to brag about how great his country is and all its beauty. “And onto my eldest daughter, she’s quite the superstar. All her humanitarian work has brought eyes onto Zamunda. Y/n, aren’t you working on the STEM school project? She’s also a professor!” The King spoke with pride in his voice, making you want to hide in a corner.
A humble but nervous chuckle left your lips. “It was just a week of me teaching lectures, Baba.” Your words made the whole room laugh but his smile was the brightest. “But yes, the STEM project is still in its early days but a lot of students are interested which makes me happy.” You concluded with a small smile.
Lewis looked impressed. Wait. Since when did you care what anyone thought of your hard work? Especially a man that you knew would be a major distraction to the single lifestyle you’ve lived all these years. You had much to focus on and becoming Queen of Zamunda was at the top of your list.
But why not let loose a little? ‘Live a little’ as your sisters often say whenever you come back home exhausted.
“Is that so? Lewis here has his own foundation for kids in STEM, specifically for motorsport!” The tall team principal smiled and it took everything in you to look into the man’s eyes as you felt them on you.
“I could tell you more about it if you’d like.” Lewis spoke in a calm, low voice. You wanted to walk closer so that you could hear his words travel through you, wanting to listen to every word he had to say to you, every action he wanted to do to y-
Taking a breath and putting a soft smile on your face, you nodded. “I’d like that, thank you.” Talks of hot laps and tours started flying around but you couldn’t hear a word that was said. What was wrong with you? All this man had done was look into your eyes and you felt like you could melt. Lewis clearly used this gentlemanly charm to persuade everyone around him, including your father.
Watching him converse with your family had unleashed a new swarm of butterflies in your stomach, something you hadn’t truly felt in a long time. You had been with one or two people casually but none had ever satisfied you, only caring about your status as Princess. However, you had a gut feeling about something but you didn’t want to dwell on it yet.
“Shall we go for the tour now?” Toto’s voice boomed around the room with a clap of his hands.
-
Feeling a nudge on your arm, you turn to look at your mom as your attention was on the screens around the garage. “Are you going to bring him to Zamunda?” Your mother teased with a smile. Your eyebrows furrowed before you realised who she was referring to.
“Mother, I’d rather not talk about that now. Let’s just enjoy where we are now.” You put your hand on your mom’s then turned to look at the screen.
“He’d make a lovely prince. It’s okay to separate yourself from work, you know? I want you to live a little, my angel.” She continued, enveloping both her hands around yours.
You opened your mouth to speak but she beat you to it. “Don’t worry about your father. He’d be ecstatic if you brought this one home. You still have a lot of time left, Y/n.”
Knowing your mother was right, you breathed in and refocused your attention to qualifying. Lewis seemed to be doing well, even his driving looked attractive to you. Okay, calm it down girl.
After quali, the Mercedes hospitality was buzzing even though the skies were ever gray. Munching on a piece of cake, you offered a smile to those who would walk past and gawk at you. It was evident that F1 had made quite the big deal about your family merely attending a race weekend but you never expected this attention much on you.
A camera crew stayed outside and continuously took pictures of you sitting by your lonesome and you hoped for something to distract you from the feeling of being watched. Surprisingly, the crew began walking away after looking behind you for a split second and the cologne that suddenly surrounded you made it very clear who did it.
“Sorry if they were bothering you, your highness.” Lewis spoke, eventually standing in front of you yet not taking a seat across. Chuckling a bit, you looked up at him. “I thought we spoke about the title, Lewis.”
“Yes we did but I can’t let the media know you like that, only I’ve received the honour.” He smiled and there were the butterflies again. “If you’d like to sit down, you may.” You offered with the sweetest smile. Taking your offer, he never took his eyes off you.
It was quiet as he observed you. “What?” Looking like a deer in headlights, you placed your spoon down. “You’re a powerhouse. I’ve seen you represent your country and how much love you have for it. It’s admirable.”
You were taken aback. You hadn’t received such compliments from someone you were interested in. “Well, now I feel terrible because I’ve got no clue about your sport.” You spoke, covering your mouth with your floating hand.
“That’s okay, Princess.” All he did was say those words and you felt like a puddle all over again. “You’re doing that thing with your eyes again.” You pointed out, wondering if he could see right through your demeanour.
“What thing are my eyes doing, Y/n?”
“…I’d rather not say it in public.”
Lewis’ smirk widened as you said that. He thought it would be a challenge to try make a move on you as you seemed reserved unlike the rest of your family. “Why not? I’m quite curious to hear your thoughts.” He smiled, adjusting his arms to rest on the table.
“Not in your team’s hospitality suite.” You quickly replied, your eyes darting everywhere but him.
“Y/n.” Lewis just said your name and just like that, your thoughts became improper. Locking eyes with him, you knew that he was teasing you, something that you were never able to experience others.
“We can speak about our foundations over dinner!” You quickly suggested, barely registering what just came out of your mouth. “Dinner sounds perfect however that was supposed to be my line.” He joked and you couldn’t help but laugh.
-
Everything felt chaotic. You had returned to the hotel from the race which was extremely exhilarating and he had gotten a relatively high position which made you proud.
As you were leaving your seat in the garage a few hours ago, Lewis had approached you knowing very well that the cameras were watching the exchange between the two of you. “I forgot to mention how gorgeous you looked earlier.” He said as he was standing relatively close to you.
“Lewis! You can’t say that, the cameras are watching.” You whisper yelled, looking at the cameras pointed at the scene before them. All he did was laugh and turn on his heel before turning his head to you. “I’ll see you at 7 pm , your highness.” He winked and just like that, he was gone.
And that whole memory ran through your mind as you paced up and down your hotel room. You were all ready for the dinner but you were feeling something…different. It was normal for you to have dinners but this one had a certain tension hanging over it. You smoothed out your dress with your hands as you paced.
Another thing that drove you crazy was that you had no clue of what exactly was happening. You always knew the time, setting and guests of everything you did but now you were completely out of the loop but you had trust in him, as insane as it sounds.
The knock on your door pulled you out of your thoughts and you took a breath before turning the doorknob to reveal Lewis standing there with a bouquet of flowers you couldn’t recognise but your heart grew at the sight of them. Your eyes glided over him as you looked at his outfit, a white cardigan with black slacks and designer chunky shoes. He smiled and you almost fell to your knees just looking at him more relaxed and sexy.
“You look absolutely beautiful, Y/n.” He complimented, his own eyes moving all over your body. He couldn’t help but admire your beauty as you stood before him. You were the embodiment of a princess and you never failed to exude such energy as you did.
“Uh, would you like to come in? I just have to get my heels.” You spoke as you opened the door a little wider. The room smelt of a scent he couldn’t quite grasp but he definitely labelled it as an aphrodisiac because Lewis began feeling his hands getting hot. He made his way to the couch right by the large window as you closed the door.
You stood in the middle of the room with your fingers pinching your lip in nervousness. The tension could be cut with a knife with the way he was watching you. “Um so, how’d you plan this?” You asked, finally looking at Lewis but you noticed his eyes were slightly lower.
“Your sisters are quite the wingwomen.” He spoke, adjusting his body to sit comfortably.
“Right, right……”
A beat passed before he leaned forward. “Princess, is everything okay?”
“Do you think we could skip dinner? I never usually do this but I don’t think I can go another moment.” You blurted out, too afraid to see his reaction to your raunchy suggestion.
Another moment of silence passed and you felt defeated. You felt like you’d gone on too strong and that’s not what you envisioned at all.
“Y/n.” He called and you picked your head up to look up.
“C’mere.”
saint’s notes: you thought I was going to give you smut???? no 🤭 hope you enjoyed though! 🫶🏽
#☆ ‧₊˚ saint’s media pen#saint writes#lewis hamilton x black reader#lewis hamilton fanfics#lewis hamilton imagine#lewis hamilton x oc#lewis hamilton fanfic#lewis hamilton fic#lewis hamilton x reader#f1 x black!reader#f1 imagines#f1 x reader#f1 x you#f1 imagine#f1 fic#f1 fanfic#formula one x black reader#formula one x reader#formula 1 x black!reader#formula 1 fanfic
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THE ENTIRE DRAGON AGE AMA IS A DUMPSTER FIRE
They avoided all the high-rated questions with genuine criticism (not blind hate!) and went for questions that were safer and allowed them more leeway. After that awful IGN article and that treatment of Davrin...God, just put it down. I have no faith that BioWare will be able to continue Dragon Age or Mass Effect with the respect it deserves.
Edit - They had an opportunity for genuine discussion with fans who were concerned/unhappy with the way Veilguard was -> people unhappy with the story, the marketing, the lack of 'RP' options in an RPG, etc... Instead they just doubled-down even more, avoiding those critical questions, with no real acknowledgement that fans have very reasonable problems with this game.
Some Highlights & My Initial Ramblings Below:
The Executors
"They attempt to manipulate events in the most subtle way they can manage."
So, very clear that they're not simply observers of what is happening in Thedas: they're manipulators...
"Magical Illuminati Confirmed! Lizard People Did 9:30 Dragon!!!!"
All that complexity of character -> his hatred of Orlais, his experience as a general, his relationship with Cailain, and the influence of Howe...all diminished. Any influence from a shadow cabal is too much influence - all the humanity of Loghain's choices/consequences...God, what a waste.
Not to mention what this does to other events/characters in the series -> they imply they've been intervening as far back as the magisters breaking into the golden city. I do not find this compelling! At all!
2. Solas and the Executors
Oh my god, he sounds like such a fucking Mary-Sue I'm so sick of Solas at this point -> "Actually, I know more about the Executors than anyone alive - not even the rest of the Gods know as much as me."
("I'm also, like, an Ancient Elven God, I'm responsible for the Blight and the Veil, and I kind of locked the Gods away cause they were evil - but, like, I'm really sad about it. Also the Herald of Andraste thinks I'm cute <3")
<- Previous comments: massive oversimplification, obviously
But I miss the days when not everything was about Solas. It removes so much interest and wonder in this world when the fucking egg is behind it all. I loved him as a character in DAI and now I just feel this bone deep tiredness when I see his stupid face.
Don't you dare threaten to bring Gareth David-Lloyd back -> keep him away from this mess!
3. The Fate of the Rest of the Evanuris
Yay. I'm so looking forwards to "The Return of the Elves: Electric Boogaloo 2" - it was done so well the first time!
"It was the elves all along!"
The only character with any potential to be interesting is Andruil*, but how they handled all this lore was done so shallowly and so poorly that I find it hard to give a damn anymore. Not to mention that the game literally mentions Ghilan'nain mourning Andruil - so is this a retcon/redirection/or have you confirmed that one of the most interesting members of the Evanuris' is dead?
*interesting in that she's established in lore to potentially have a tonne of really cool things attached to her (the void armour, the great weapon she has etc...). The rest of the evanuris are nowhere near as well established as she is.
4. Southern Thedas, Sociopolitical Issues, and Future Games
NOW YOU WANT TO INCORPORATE GEO-POLITCAL EXPLORATION?? You avoided any meaningful discussion like the plague in DATV but now you're acknowledging it?? OkaY. okAy.
They couldn't even give us the long-term ramifications of the mage/templar war how the hell am I supposed to believe that they will be able to pull off 'elven gods are real' etc...? For a game series that totes : your choices matter -> they have not proven that they have been able to show that in a meaningful way. They literally cleaned the slate with this game to avoid doing that.
So, what, does that mean that the Veil is never going to come down now? Or are you going to have the entirety of Thedas build themselves up again just to have the Veil fall and send things into chaos once more?
What a fatalistic, miserable outcome for Thedas -> why the fuck would anyone bother to live in Thedas if you're going to keep throwing meteorites at them? By all means, change/conflict has to happen for the series to move forwards...but this is just so miserable at this point.
(The Elder Scrolls, at least, gives people room to breathe between crisis' or sets them up in different areas of the world! Bethesda treats past installments/your decisions with greater respect than DATV does.)
Even, then, if the Veil remains up, that means that the spirits are just trapped in the Fade being miserable for the rest of existence. The entire series has been humanizing spirits, from Justice to Cole, and now they're just throwing in the towel? I guess they can stay in the fade now! Problem solved!
What do you mean the Evanuris are not a threat anymore? IN A PREVIOUS QUESTION YOU LITERALLY SAID SOME ARE STILL POTENTIALLY KICKING AROUND THE BLACK CITY?
Weakened, sure, but Solas was 'weak' in DAI. You're giving yourself an out if you decide to go back to the elves again. Please do, I'd love more content on how the elves alone fuck everything up!
5. More Southern Thedas, the Chantry, and Tevinter
Thanks for the confirmation that things in the South are so fucked up that they have to work alongside the 'Slave Capital' of the known world to rebuild!
Slavery was one of the biggest things that caused a rift between the north/south chantry system -> one of the reasons why there were exalted marches -> a uniting belief in the south is that slavery is fucked. They didn't address slavery in DATV - what hopes are there that they will do so effectively in a future game?
Don't tell me that Dorian fixes everything off screen either -> either he solves slavery off-screen or the south is being forced to work the slaver-capitol because their land is nuked and they have no ground to stand on.
I'm so thrilled.
6. Solas and the Idol / The Blight
I will never get over Solas fucking curing the Blight off-screen and no one asking questions/giving a shit. Hello?? The Hero of Ferelden would like a word with you???
So the Blight is calcified in Minrathous, at least, but everywhere further away is still fucked! Once more, the South is doomed to suffer from the long-term effects that regular blights have -> not to mention the red lyrium (which still exists according to the AMA) across the south.
I don't care; it's lame. It's a lame way to conclude the blight and I hate it. This game did not earn 'cure the blight from thedas' at all. You could have had us learn how to soothe a titan and see how that can diminish the blight but you did it this way.
Another 'magical ritual' because Solas has such a good track record with them lmao.
7. The Agents of Fen'Harel / The War with the Qun / The Crows
Turned him against the idea of being a leader???!!
Fen'harel's Call to the Elven People After the events at the Winter Palace, elves left the Inquisition under mysterious circumstances, as did elven servants across Thedas. None could say where they went, but those who believed the Inquisitor's story about Fen'Harel wondered just how large the Dread Wolf's forces were... and what the ancient elven rebel had planned. This is from the Trespasser Epilogue, Epler!
Your concept art for Joplin literally had him as a leader of a faction of elves. Just be honest that it's a retcon and you changed course - don't try to save face with this reasoning.
About the Antaam: "We needed some big mindless bad guys to fight and so we did this because we didn't want to address the Qunari War/Invasion we set up in Trespasser".
You had to canonize Sten as being alive and Arishok in order for this reasoning to work -> you didn't even come up with an alternative Arishok to take Sten's place.
Yeah, the exchange that set up the Crows we see in the game as "idealists" did not make the game. I can confirm that!
I'm sorry, "Caterina kept Illario in check?" as in, 'kept him an idealist and not the usual Crow'? The woman that beat him with a cane and starved him and his cousin to train them as Crows. Fuck off.
lmao -> tell me you're coming up with this on the spot without telling me that you're coming up with this on the spot.
8. World State Discrepancies - Isabela
Outright ignores the very real criticism about the marketing from this game and World States.
"there are absolutely places where we unintentionally suggested there was a hard canon (...that Isabela is always assumed to have joined Hawke's party.)"
Unintentional?
Excuse me, you have her talk about Merrill and the Kirkwall Crew as family - that was not unintentional in the slightest. Not to mention Sten, Blackwall, Sera, and Cole are canonized as being part of your world state no matter what.
You had a story you wanted to tell - one that only fit a few world states - and you went ahead with it and disregarded those choices. Don't try and lie about this all being a big misunderstanding.
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Edit - They could have taken the opportunity to address the very reasonable criticisms that people had with this game but they cherry-picked questions and avoided/minimized anything remotely critical.
They could have provided us some insight into the game development time but each time they approached the topic they settled for "we're happy with what we delivered and it was well optimized."
They had an opportunity to acknowledge that people were bothered by the handling of the lore/stories (to potentially mention they could course-correct/ rethink their plans) but instead they doubled down on everything that they did and even 'justified' some decisions. They doubled down on the Executors, Solas's changing motivations, the destruction of Southern Thedas, and the elves/Solas being at the heart of everything etc...
This AMA basically confirmed that the only reason they did what they did to the south was for a reset -> It's not a compelling or fulfilling narrative to have everything we've done reset back to ground zero off-screen. BioWare games differentiate themselves from other RPG's by their import system from previous games - it was compelling and exciting! With DATV they set the expectation that BioWare can outright throw out entire games worth of choices/build up, not solely retcon them.
Justifying your choice to water down the lore/world of your story by saying you'll address it in the 'next game' does not instill me with confidence, BioWare! It doesn't explain that lack of it in this game either!
They avoided every question that, rightfully so, pointed out the misleading comments made by devs in the pre-order period of the game:
the fact that there were only 3 imported choices from previous games was leaked by a reviewer -> BioWare was vague from the start about choices
that this game was the most 'romantic' in the series
that world states/ headcanons wouldn't be disrespected
that there are 'lore' reasons for bad darkspawn design
that there are lasting, impactful choices/consequences to be made in this game
that the lore/world was not watered or toned down
that companions are deep and you can disagree with them etc...
BioWare's behavior towards their customers in the lead up period to this games release was downright scummy. I absolutely felt misled after playing the game for myself and recalling what I read in interviews put out. While EA is undoubtedly poison, you can't hold them solely accountable for this.
I feel for the individual developers who worked on this in what was undoubtedly a toxic environment from EA - but I feel that it's pretty clear that BioWare itself has a lot of problems within and in their leadership/executives. Working for EA does not give them an excuse to mislead their customers.
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I already had a very grim outlook on the franchise from the end of DATV but this literally look my interest out the back and sent it to God. What a disaster.
#what a dumpster fire#I thought it would be bad but not this bad#obviously don't attack devs! no one deserves to be harassed or anything - bioware as a studio is not in a good place imo#if you like it then I'm glad but this series is going in a direction that has absolutely no appeal to me :/#its just such a grim way to end the series - with everything blighted and ruined#this game feels like it punishes me for caring about the world they created#that IGN interview was awful too - how did anyone think it would help their public perception???#the lore and story has absolutely been ruined by the game#epler that was a godawful take on davrin - that needed to be clarified way clearer#does bioware's pr office hate them? is this some internal fuckery?? lmao#edit - my bafflement has died down and I can add some more critical thoughts about what they could have taken this AMA opportunity to do#I've loved this series for around 12-13 years now and its just sad that its ending this way for me :(#datv spoilers#datv critical#dragon age the veilguard#bioware critical#veilguard critical
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Kinda weird ask incoming: Are Bill's substance abuse issues in your characterization based on anything canon or an Alex Hirsch interview or something or is it just "he obviously would abuse substances (more) if this wasn't a disney show so I'm just filling in the blanks"
1/3 actual canon & context clues, 1/3 reading five feet deep into one foot deep canon material, 1/3 "he totally would if this wasn't Disney."
To my knowledge there's no interviews confirming that he's heavy on the substance ABUSE (rather than just substance use), but to my recollection I'm pretty sure he's got the most allusions to consuming something alcohol/drug-adjacent of all the characters in the show. Outside of Bill we've got:
Stan ordering "expired apple juice"
since we're including "they probably would have done this if not for Disney," you could make the argument that Stan drinking Pitt cola was probably supposed to be beer cans.
the apple cider at the Northwest party
I'm gonna throw in Grenda drinking spoiled milk
Mabel consuming Smile Dip
farmer Sprott drinking hippie tea and pouring it out when he sees the love god fly by
Ford & the Oracle drinking Cosmic Sand, something strong enough he wakes up the next morning in a different dimension
that one alcoholic priest in TBOB
on TINAWDC, Ford tells Stan where to find his stash of beer.
And I think that's it?? Remind me if there's more.
WITH Bill, we've got:
In the Bill Reddit AMA he mentions salting his margarita glass with Time Baby's molecules. (and for the longest time I'm pretty sure this was the only explicit reference to an alcoholic beverage in a Gravity Falls-adjacent media; but Reddit is a godless land where S&P cannot tread, so I'm not gonna put too much weight on that. Still worth mentioning tho.)
he's got Time Punch at his Fearamid Party. Considering the "time" in the name, it could be related to Cosmic Sand (maybe you mix sand to make the punch?) which would mean they're drinking HARD.
(if Cosmic Sand IS related to Time Punch, now that we know Jheselbraum was in Bill's gang, there's a high chance she picked up drinking it while in the Henchmaniacs, so that's another thing we can now tie back to Bill's influence.)
He's drinking something while trying to interrogate Ford, an activity you'd probably want to be clear headed for, meaning either he drinks so hard so regularly that he DOES still have a clear head or else he's so accustomed to going "this is stressful, I need a drink to unwind" that he just does it even though it puts him at a disadvantage.
with the addition of TBOB, we now have: the silly straw page, where he's drinking a cocktail while also sitting in an enormous cocktail. Bill gushes about silly straws as one of his favorite things; and we know that stems from childhood, but NOW he paints an association between silly straws, drinks, and an overall margaritaville vibe
Bill mentions that the shaman introduced him to a local strain of hallucinogenic moss
Bill brings boxed wine to the Puritan girls' night.
Bill gets Ford wasted at karaoke night (and I have no doubt Bill was just as sloshed)—and if he knows how to make a drink that'll get you drunk in your sleep, he's got some serious mixology chops
the O'Sadley's incident.
That's so big it gets two bullet points. Nowhere else in all of Gravity Falls is there such an extensive, explicit, or extreme example of unhealthy substance abuse—barring the Smile Dip incident, but like, Mabel didn't know that was gonna happen and immediately swore off Smile Dip.
Three bullet points. He noclipped a guy into the ceiling. he got so drunk he forgot he killed his mom. He was arrested for "indecent exposure." Bill you good???
So most of the examples of drinking/hallucinogenics we get from the rest of the show are like, casual drinking or else children doing stupid shit. ONE incident of depressed drinking and one alcoholic side character.
But Bill drinks when he's partying, drinks when he's depressed, drinks when he's relaxing, drinks when he's stressed, drinks socially, drinks alone, drinks when he's helping a friend have fun, and thinks about drinking when he contemplates his worst enemies.
Okay.
Now half of these are from TBOB, so obviously they didn't factor into my decision to portray him as inclined to substance abuse over a year ago; but like... I'd say I interpreted the info we had on hand correctly, yeah?
Beyond that, it's a headcanon built up on the fact that he's got a lot of traits that lend themselves toward substance abuse.
An EXTREME "maximum fun NOW, consequences later NEVER" attitude. There seems to be no limits to how far he'll go in the name of chaos, fun, & hedonism, no matter who he hurts, no matter if he hurts himself. He's got that combination of reckless + irresponsible + shortsighted + passively self-destructive.
BIG on partying, which generally means drinks are involved and definitely seems to be the case here based on the time punch. "A party that never ends with a host that never dies"??
"says he's happy, he's a liar." When an emotionally stunted depressed person is in denial about being depressed and trying to convince everyone they're fine, what's a common coping mechanism? Self-medication!
he likes hurting himself. consuming substances in ways that are harmful to him is recreation to him. Yes I am talking about the soda in the eyes, even if it was a loaner body that can't have felt pleasant. The way he seeks out extreme+strange sensations makes me think he'd jump at the chance to try some weird new substance that does some crazy new thing to your head.
loves to socialize, but like... doesn't seem to have close friends. It would make sense for him to be inclined to use drinks/drugs as a social lubricant, both for himself and for his "friends," to help them all overlook the fact that maybe they don't actually really enjoy each other.
he's got a very strained relationship with reality, by which I mean he's actively attempting to murder reality and replace it with fantasy. What's a common method people use to try to escape/avoid reality? Self-medication!! What's one variety of self-medication particularly good at letting you slide into a fantasy world? Hallucinogenics! Which thanks to TBOB we now know he takes!!!
if Bill's reaction to an emotionally close relationship catastrophically falling apart is going on a massive bender, and if Bill's got a long string of exes that fell apart so catastrophically that they're straight up blocking his number, he's denying he ever dated them or ever felt love, and he's claiming that love is merely a pupa for hate... I think there's probably been a lot of benders.
overall he's just... a stressed, cranky, high-strung control freak who wants to give off the image of being so chill and cool and popular and enviable and suuuper happy. I think it'd make sense for him to turn to chemical assistance to bridge the gap between who he really is and who he pretends to be.
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HAPPY 10TH ANNIVERSARY, WOLF 359!
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Here's the Season 4 poster to celebrate!
To the cast and crew (if they somehow happen to see this) (I doubt any of them are on Tumblr so I'll just ramble to the void):
This show honestly changed my life. I know it's cliché, but really, it did. It also helped me as a writer — watching the AMAs to hear what the writers said and studying the scripts improved my skills exponentially. Furthermore, the plot, the voice talent, the sound design and the soundtrack are all crafted amazingly — you can really tell the show is brimming with passion! It's really a love letter to sci-fi fans too.. gosh, I could honestly talk about why I love this show for hours, but I'll keep it short. Essentially, if you see this, thank you for creating something so wonderful. Thank you for inspiring so many people. Thank you for creating such a great story.
To everyone else (I know it'll mostly be fans seeing this, but just in case one of my followers hasn't listened):
If you haven't listened to Wolf 359, I highly recommend it. 10/10 show. And it's definitely a good starting point in terms of fiction podcasts; since it's so cinematic, you can visualise everything you hear very easily, making it great to listen to! Also, for a show that's 10 years old, it aged really well. Many shows like that fall to the issue of having outdated jokes and references, but Wolf 359 is a truly timeless one.
#wolf 359#hera#daniel jacobi#isabel lovelace#renee minkowski#doug eiffel#dr pryce#miranda pryce#mr cutter#marcus h cutter#rachel young#victor riemann#warren kepler
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This is what happens when dozens to hundreds of people openly harass a game dev all at once.
You are not entitled to the devs. That is not part of being a fan. That is not what you pay for when you buy the game.
The act of creating should not guarantee harassment. Fic writers, you should know this better than anyone. Anyone is free to not like a work of fiction. Fic writers don't sign up to having hate groups made about them just for the act of writing fic. On a huge scale, that applies to game devs, too. Yes, they're paid. No, that doesn't mean their job description includes receiving death threats by the dozen. No, that doesn't mean that they should receive hate from fans to that scale over what is, for the most part, a difference between what was said about DA's lore and your own headcanons. (Yes, I remember what Epler said about Davrin. And no, that's not what the majority of you took issue with in your posts and your venting, be honest with yourselves. The majority were mad about Solas, Pookie Of All Time.)
Are you kidding me?
You cannot deduce a person's whole personality from tweets, or from responses on a reddit AMA. I can't believe I have to say this in the year of our lord 2024.
#dragon age#fandom critical#are you fucking kidding me everyone#i am so disappointed#we are all adults#and yet
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Cause I got nothing to lose : Xia Fei, my new hero in Link Click
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before any serious shit wrecks havoc I want to ramble a bit
oh my god, I love xia fei. I mean I knew I would love him but that was for a different reason. He is probably gonna die in the near future, probably lu guang's action triggering his death (or he may not die at all! maybe he survives in this timeline, changing a major node! I hope, I hope), he is already a struggling student economically helpless abroad, his 'Emma' vibes are strong, he assures his worrying mother even though he goes through financial hardships. He is smart enough to know he is being exploited (and tbh the theme of surveillance and making him the 'morbid' object of gaze, I say morbid because in the last scene of his pv, it's a dead shot, his eyes look so dead, the camera's battery is dead. But yk what remains? his face card. The like button continually popping with likes made me very uncomfortable. The cinematography, symbolism and metaphor- link click's visual storytelling just never ceases to amaze.) Also how him being a model is not due to his passion, he desperately needs this money to survive (sounds familiar?)
But really...link click was really link clicking when we got xia fei's first appearance. Subtle social commentary at its finest. Not a woman, but a man is being made fun of for his astronomical career growth in exchange for supposed 'sexual favours'. Those ladies were not, in fact, subtle about it. I'll dive deeper into Xia Fei's psychology later but this encounter shows the harsh reality of the entertainment industries, mostly for those who did not join for passion but rather who had no choice.
Also the scene where his roommate. Man. It's important to address how 'casually' harassment can happen and an AMAB person can be a victim too. Anyway when the roommate tells him about ' the gig that pays quick money and they would like a hottie like you!' I couldn't help but flinch, I understand his rage. Of course, it's again insinuated to be something sexual. That's the first impression Xia Fei also has.
His pv is translated as 'lending body' or 'lending skin', ik it may have multiple meanings but one of them is very prominent.
Selling your face. Or maybe selling your body.
The way the camera fixes its gaze on Xia Fei continually, it's not really for fanservice merely. He is this object people ogle at. (and the way liu xiao and vein ogle at him in his pv makes me sick nvm). Even though it's his own body and beauty that makes him famous, he has no autonomy whatsoever. He realises it. That's why he says
Cause I have got nothing to loose
I don't really think link click is about time traveling. It's that archtexual exercise that constantly subverts genres at its level best. You know what, defamiliarise, many people do not like uncool stuff, for example : issues struggling young people actually face in real life, in this late stage capitalism. That's why link click should not reach that demographic of people. I hope it never does. I hope it gets famous within a community who actually understand and resonate with this show.
Also Xia Fei's story talks about another important theme of the donghua; photo! How photos taken in private spheres are meant to preserve memories of the loved ones, loved encounters. How you capture someone you love in that still image, alive with the emotion you associate with them, giving it an afterlife. The photo becomes the literal and metaphorical medium through which Lu Guang can rewrite history. Forget-me-not, remembrance. It empowers him.
On the contrary, for Xia Fei, it is the panopticon seizing his life and rendering it absurd. The emotive power and affect for lu guang changes into viscous institutionalised power politics for Xia Fei. Brilliant! 😭
I can't help but quote a few lines from a poem by Ama Codjoe
On Seeing and Being Seen
I am touching the photograph of my last seduction. It is as slick as a magazine page, as dark as a street darkened by rain.
When I want to remember something beautiful, instead of taking a photograph, I close my eyes. Desire made you beautiful. I closed my eyes.
.... Tonight, I am alone in my tenderness. There is nothing in my hand except a certain grasping. In my mind’s eye, I am stroking your hair with damp fingertips. This is exactly how it happened. On the lit-up hotel bed, I remember thinking, My body is a lens I can look through with my mind.
Lmao I didn't want to write all of this I'm so sorry 😭
So yeah, that was all the impressions hmph before yingdu ep 3. Now.
I want Xia Fei to be my bestie and go with me on friendship dates. Don't get me wrong, I love Cheng Xiaoshi, but he personally feels to be more like a brother to me, who is infuriating at times and that dumb bitch I'll protect at all costs. I want to befriend Xia Fei and it's serious 😭.
Also I would want, in another timeline, Cheng Xiaoshi and him being complete besties, two dumb twinks twinking with each other. Dumb gays basically. We have got INTJ nerd in Lu Guang, it's refreshing to see ENFP nerd in Xia Fei. Xia Fei could effortlessly be the best regular visitor of the time photo studio. I do not want to tear up thinking about him right now but I really want him to be happy...in another timeline. Blooming with happiness, close to his friends and loved ones, content and safe...
talking about loved ones...
I want an AU where he
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fixes this mf
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I want Vein to experience at least 1/5th of Lu Guang's anguish and melancholy for Xia Fei. I know, I know maybe Vein will kill Xia Fei when he defects, he is just using him from the very beginning but my love, that's what I am saying! In that AU, they will start off all toxic yaoi shit but at the end it will be...he was a cannibal and he was just a guy, their inter-timeline love will change your perception of love!
I mean no sorry, Xia Fei deserves to be loved and why Vein? because that's his punishment. Melancholic love can be the greatest punishment for someone who goes like a vendor and asks random people " would you like some punishment?" no, sir, thank you sir, would YOU like some sincere human emotions that chomp on your conscience? It's called love, it's limited edition but I'll arrange some for you!
Ok, I have got another fic to write 😭
returning to this post because @whispersoflullaby and I were discussing Xia Fei's body dysmorphia which seems specific to AFAB people and queer people. He isn't someone who is proud of his 'beauty', welp, that's odd for a typical handsome cishet person? His 'beauty' is turned against him. Ngl he reminds me of Ash Lynx a bit. You might say that he had a history of abuse and that's why he assumed the 'gig' his roommate mentioned as sex work. But there is more to it. He is definitely not a typical cishet boy, he is not projected to be one either. Even in the short span of ep 3, it's established that Xia Fei has some intimate connections to Vein, irrespective of whether Vein is using him or not. His anger at his roommate's remark feels very close to violating his identity as a queer person. The assumption that queer people are naturally 'lecherous', and they have no morality or anything whatsoever. But when Xia Fei is well established in the industry, this body politics is slightly changed. Money talks in the entertainment industry and money is the power in capitalist business. So those girls gossiping about the rumour that Xia Fei sleeps with the director for his career growth doesn't bother him like before. The most important thing is, he doesn't deny any rumours. He straight up says "Unlike some people, I always go for the best, whether it's a project or connection, isn't it right, boss?" His reply actually reinforces those speculations...it's giving " Yes I am a sugar baby, but ykw I can cry in my Tesla when you can't afford therapy". It's funny how at the end he says, "Right, boss?" to Vein! Link click...when I get you Link Click... *kowtows*
Also, I really wanna know what exactly did Vein say through the phone to get this reaction out of Xia Fei and cancel his plans to return home.
he is pleasantly shocked! You can see his eyes...that's some sincere emotions and then after the shock subsides, a soft look overcomes his expression. He softy sighs.
And also, idk if I am hallucinating but there is a little blush visible near his eyes (it's no longer there when he sighs)...I want to know what Vein said to him 😭 that interaction is shot in a very *jabsjksksdjnd* way, you can't deny it's intimate.
#veinfei#vein x xia fei#vein link click#xia fei link click#link click#shiguang daili ren#yingdu chapter#时光代理人#donghua#cheng xiaoshi#bridon arc#veifei#veifei meta#sgdlr#shiguang#lu guang
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Name: Abigail Anderson
Zodiac Sign: Aries but in a violent way
Age: Early 20s, mentally 45 due to trauma
Location: Wherever my bad decisions take me
About me:
What's up? I'm a murderously motivated gym rat with commitment issues. Might beat your dads head in with a golf club, might adopt a little brother, depends on the day.
I'm better at hand to hand combat than emotional processing.
Can carry you over my shoulder, but emotionally? I will drop you.
Former war criminal, current exhausted single parent.
If you hate me, that's fine. I hate me too.
Hobbies:
✨ Weightlifting.
✨ Murder.
✨ Running through buildings full of infected instead of dealing with my feelings.
✨ Eating pussy.
Looking for:
💖 A woman with a strong personality.
💖 Someone who won't die on me.
💖 Someone who doesn't hold grudges.
💖 Someone who likes boats.
💖 Someone with access to protein powder.
What I'm not looking for:
🚫 Theater kids with blood vendettas aka revenge driven lesbians with switchblades.
🚫 Any situation where I have to answer for my actions.
🚫 Pregnant women. Learned my lesson.
🚫 People who think an aquarium is a functional living space.
🚫 Cowards.
Green flags:
🔥 Excellent survival skills.
🔥 I would protect you in an active war zone.
🔥 Can bench press your entire family.
🔥 Will fight cultists for you.
🔥 Munch.
Red flags:
🚩 In a committed relationship with bad decisions.
🚩 Enemies list is longer than my friends list.
🚩 Personal trainer and emotional baggage come as a package deal.
🚩 Once had an existential crisis in a sex aquarium.
🚩 Have beef with a teenager who won't let me move on.
Messages I Will Probably Ignore:
💬 "Hey :)" (be more interesting.)
💬 "U up?" (lifting weights, probably.)
💬 "So, tell me about your trauma." (Blocked.)
(When Manny makes Abby a dating profile. Next up? Abby's Reddit AMA. Stay tuned.)
#abby the last of us#abby x reader#abby x fem!reader#abby x masc!reader#abby x you#abby tlou#tlou2#abby anderson#abby anderson tlou2#tlou#the last of us part 2#the last of us part two#lesbian
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okay. sophie. i've watched season one of the newsreader and i have so many thoughts and feelings?? the main one is frustration because this show is so close to being phenomenal but i'm constantly reworking it in my head while watching for maximum emotional impact. but putting that aside, it's just so nice to have emotional disasters on my screen again. i didn't even know that anna torv constantly on the verge of losing her shit was something i needed but by god do i deserve to watch it happen! and sam reid as a bumbling bisexual in a polyester blend is the cherry on top. thank you for the rec
Haha, I'm so glad you liked it! It's definitely flawed as a series and I think falls victim to the fact that Australian networks don't / can't afford more than 3 drafts of a script (in comparison, American and UK networks typically fund upwards of 6), but I think there's a lot to love about it too! The performances are a lot of fun, and the time period they chose to creatively operate in I think is really interesting both in terms of the stories and news it covers, but also in terms of style and sets?
My sister actually did a week's work on s3 recently for a big set piece and so I have a little inside goss about the new season too which is making me excited to see where they're taking it.
#joanna werner who's the lead producer too i really like but she's reaaaaally only done children's tv before#this is her first time lead producing an adult drama#which i think shows#she was also working as a jr producer + being mentored by someone my mum knows well on clickbait#and clickbait is AWFUL lmao#so i'm very curious as to what that was like behind the scenes#but yes#totally get your criticisms both here and in the other post too haha#australian tv is unfortunately often deeply flawed as a result of how our writers rooms work where nothing quite gets developed enough#and no one being able to ever work full time on a show#but alas#my biggest issue in s2 was actually dale's heel turn which i don't think was built to well at all#especially because i feel like they do tend to write his sexuality and all that that encompasses pretty well#the newsreader#tv asks#welcome to my ama
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If Rise is a proxy for the game trying to give Yu a thinly veiled "default romance", then her parallels with Yosuke and the way they interact with Yu make for a fascinating comparison
(aka follow me down this weird delusional rabbit hole. Strap in because this is going to be a long and very weird one.)
1. Similar patterns of flirting
Unlike Rise, Yosuke is of course a lot less intentional and a lot more oblivious to what he's actually doing, but his behaviour is actually very similar to Rise's in some ways.
For example, the both of them find an in with Yu through "being shown around" Inaba.
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(actually there's a scene with naoto's first day at the school, where a few girls are trying to flirt with naoto using the same lines of showing him around, so that's fun.)
There's a difference in context here - Yosuke is playing that senpai-adjacent role for Yu, whereas Rise is asking Yu to play it for her (even though Inaba is Rise's hometown, and when you take her to souzai daigaku she says she's always wanted to go there).
But this difference is also important because...
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Yosuke's type is someone he can look after. (Btw, this is an extremely common male response in Asia - that men like dating someone they can look after. Remember this because it'll come up again later.)
I think throughout the course of the game Yosuke is very much consistently someone that likes taking care of people - quite obviously he looks after Teddie, but he's also always looking out for Kanji and everyone else, actually.
But there's something that changes slightly between him and Yu - as their relationship develops, Yosuke becomes more willing to be the one being looked after, but by Yu especially! This is something that is picked up on by others in the group, such as when Kanji says that Yu tends to spoil Yosuke, or when Chie tells Yu that Yosuke is going to come begging him soon.
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Neither Kanji nor Chie talk about how Yosuke asked them for help - because Yosuke, for the most part, is pretty resistant towards asking people for help... unless it's Yu. Yu is the exception in this regard, because where most people see Yosuke as being reliable, they also know that if Yosuke has issues, it's Yu that he turns to. And he does! In front of Yu, Yosuke lets himself be vulnerable, both in more serious settings but also in casual ones. Look at how Yosuke playfully ask Yu to "save him/them" (from Yukiko, Rise and Chie's cooking). It's a little dramatic. It's a little whiny. And it's all part of that role!
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But this is exactly the kind of role that Rise is playing as well.
In Japanese culture, there is the concept of 甘え (amae), which is closely related to the (perhaps more commonly known) Chinese notion of 撒娇 (sājiāo). It's hard to explain this in English because it's not really a concept that exists in Western contexts in the same way, but I think it's important because Persona is ultimately a Japanese game, and so the cultural norms and contexts that inform the relationships there are important. It's been talked about in more detail by people smarter than me (see: Takeo Doi, 1971) but the tldr is that it refers to a kind of childishness employed as a means to seek indulgence from a loved one - it's a little bit affirmation, it's a little bit flirtation, but really, the point is looking for someone to care for them. And it works the same way for the other person as well - to indulge is to love! (Remember Yosuke's response of wanting someone he can look after? Yeah.)
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When Rise drawls out the word "senpai" and whines a little, that's one example of her playing up that role so Yu would pamper her (actually I don't play in dub, so I'm not sure if she does this in EN too). But we see this with Ai as well, when Ai tells Yu to carry her shopping or buy her coffee. Ai is of course perfectly capable of doing both things, but the point is to have someone like you so much they do things for you.
Compare this to the way the others ask Yu for help - there's hesitation, and it's framed in a "if you have time, could you..." sort of manner and is markedly less playful. I think to some extent it's also their personalities, but that's kind of the point here.
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I think it's important to caveat at this point that this "submissive" role during amae isn't, like, a fixed role that they assign themselves into in their relationship - critically, it's temporal, contextual and momentary. Yosuke and Rise are only playing up their childishness so they can get attention from Yu in that moment, but it in no way speaks to how they expect their relationship to function, because it's just brief instances of flirtation. For both Rise and Yosuke, their relationship with Yu is still primarily defined by their equalness and what they can do for Yu as well. It also goes both ways - Yu is also welcome to do the same with Rise and Yosuke! It's also very much a purposeful demonstration of vulnerability, because if you've read the signs wrongly, then it may not be perceived as flirting, just general annoyingness. Which is why...
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I think they're both particularly sensitive about accidentally being a bother to Yu, and the way the both of them speak has these layers of boldness and shyness interspersed and folded into each other.
To put it another way, you can think of this indulgence as an extension of the love language of acts of service - and amae is essentially a way of pretending to be helpless to encourage that act of service. (this is an extremely dumbed down definition stripped of nuance)
The point here as Rise flirts with Yu in this manner... I think so does Yosuke, even if he's not totally conscious of it.
2. The shared fear of loneliness
Both Yosuke and Rise express this same fear - Yosuke's shadow reveals his fear of being alone so he actively surrounds himself with as many people as he can, while Rise reveals in her slink that she was a shy, lonely child and became an idol because she thought it would help her connect with people and make more friends. There's this powerful desire of acceptance on their part that forced them towards behaviour that they felt would make them desirable and liked - Yosuke makes jokes and buys food for his friends and tries to be a dependable big-brother type, and his shadow says he's only like that because he's terrified of being alone, while Rise's idol image is about being bright and enthusiastic and bubbly, but her vulnerable moments reveal her to be withdrawn and she says it was all an act.
I think there's a really interesting parallel here, because they both learn that it doesn't really work the way they hoped - the relationships that they had previously formed can be superficial (Yosuke talks about this point with Marie and Yu on the rooftop, while Rise learns that people only see Risette but not her), or temporary and easily forsaken (Yosuke doesn't really have anyone calling him back after his move, while Rise talks about how quickly people moved on from her).
Critically though, it's also in how they are resolved, and in both cases, Yu is the catalyst that helps them understand that not only is that desire normal and understandable, but that both that desire and their responses to it are all part of them. Yosuke's and Rise's cheerfulness and care are not any less meaningful just because of where that sentiment came from. There's no real Yosuke or real Rise, and while this is also a theme for the rest of the IT, I think it's with Yosuke and Rise especially that this particular thread of a fake self created to be accepted and help them make friends is especially pronounced.
(for Kanji, his violent, abrasive self was created to hide away and push people further away, while Naoto wasn't seeking acceptance amongst peers, but their individual ideal of whom they should be).
The distinction here is meaningful insofar as it then speaks to how Yosuke and Rise subsequently perceive Yu in relation to themselves and the rest of the team. For both of them, Yu was the first person where they actually felt Seen with, and in Rise's case, it's what sparked her attraction to him, with her starting to flirt aggressively with Yu after her rescue. I think that in Yosuke's case it's very much the same thing as well, which is how we have Yosuke calling Yu his 相棒 (aibou) shortly after the fight with Yosuke's shadow. I can't place exactly when Yosuke starts doing so, because it can be as early as Marie's slink rank 1 if you did it right after, but in their conversations after the fight at the liquor store, I think the foundation is already there.
In English, 相棒 is translated as partner, which I guess is a fair translation that is captured by the sentiment of "partners in crime". It's a term that is also used in, say, buddy cop pairs (like Reno and Rude in FF7. It's also how Adachi refers to himself, as Dojima's aibou), but it's intended to capture that essence of someone that you trust above and beyond everyone else. Working on a case and your boss and colleagues say no? Doesn't matter, you aibou's got your back. It's the person that you share this absolute connection with, that knows you like you know them, maybe even knows you more than you know yourself.
But imo there's a bit of nuance that is lost, because there's also the weight of exclusivity inherent in the term - you can have a lot of friends, but only one aibou. It's one of the highest, most intense and exclusive relationship that you can have with someone... platonically.
Kick that platonic label off and we find that Yosuke and Rise are the only two that end up attached to Yu with that same, absolute intent, and hold this similar wish for some exclusive relationship with Yu. By helping them understand their loneliness and what the intimacy of being seen means, Yu has triggered the same reaction in both Yosuke and Rise - just coloured slightly differently, romantic for Rise and platonic for Yosuke. But Yosuke's route wasn't even intended to be necessarily platonic so
3. They're the two that ask Yu about his type the most
I think that with a heteronormative lens, it's easy to interpret Rise's question as one coming from romantic interest and flirtations, while Yosuke's questions are coming from patterns of locker room talk, but fuck that, I think they're both testing the waters of romantic interest and looking to see what Yu would say.
Of course, if Yu takes that one opportunity he has to say Yosuke is his type, Yosuke gets flustered and his hair-trigger nohomo reaction kicks in... but then he goes into a thing where he talks about how yeah, he'd make a pretty good boyfriend! He likes Yu's answer here, he even has the little flower animation of happiness!
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In contrast, if Yu picked Kanji, the conversation derails into a thing about Kanji's manliness. Furthermore, considering that Yosuke's romance route was cut but all of the previous conversations and interactions remained, there's no reason not to think that Yosuke wasn't responding positively to Yu's affirmations, even if he didn't necessarily understand what they meant at that time.
In the same way, if Yu responds positively or goes along with Rise's questions, Rise is also noticeably happy about it.
Because at the end of the day, they're not actually asking because they want to know what it is - they're asking because they want to hear Yu say that they are Yu's type. And I think Yosuke is guilty of this, even though he hadn't realised it yet.
#p4#p4g#persona 4#persona 4 golden#hanamura yosuke#yosuke hanamura#debated posting this one because im not even sure if im making sense to myself anymore but if you see my vision i am here to shake your hand#going in with a proper post today because my headcanon is not only very weird but also very very long#he's good with his queue
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jack and joke are soulmates in a way that is so exclusive yet contradictory to each other. it's the way no one can understand them like each other and the way no one can misunderstand them like each other. they know exactly what the other needs, at the same time they don't know how to be what the other needs. Both of them know their shortcomings, neither believe they're perfect. And each hurt they cause the other is a miscalculated one yet inflicted with awareness, each wound they heal for the other is the exact way the other wants it to be healed.
Choosing to open up to Jack about what he did at the hospital of all places was an act of driving a double-ended sword. As he stabs himself, he stabs jack too— only strangers stab you in the back, Joke stabs Jack in the front; jack saw it coming and he didn't at the same time. Joke's self destructive tendencies, his inability to forgive himself, makes him develop trust issues that prevent him from opening up and this indirectly sabotages the relationship before it starts.
As ama puts it, he trades Jack's freedom for never getting to see him again. the understanding of hurt inflicted is lodged within it. Jack never wanted to have his freedom stolen back without his knowledge. The culmination of all the stress and trauma and information he recieves in half a day leads to his outburst— to ask joke to never show his face again; this was the only way he could return the pain and inflict it on himself at the same time— by isolating (and he not only isolated from Joke but from his friends, only choosing to act with Save). Joke took his word for it this time because he loves Jack more than he did the first time they met, he believes himself to be the thorn in every relationship because all his solutions involve stealing— the one thing Jack asked him to stop doing.
both of them are traumatised and emotionally unstable due to what happened in the span of literally a day. Joke is so consumed by his guilt, he only wants to hurt himself thinking it will fix everything, Jack is so consumed by his pain he too goes to literally hurt himself in the hands of Boss' men thinking violence will give him answers as to why his life just turned upside down. And that moment between the life-and-death of their relationship, at the hospital, their pains gave rise to the worst possible misunderstanding for the moment. Jack's feeling of betrayal and saying things he doesn't mean, Joke's all-consuming guilt and not giving Jack the full story.
#its the way they hurt themselves in the same breath that they use to hurt the other#its so crazy#but they're so doomer soulmates vibes#it can be fixed through it will be fixed once boss is taken down#i know this ok trust me the real enemy is boss#and fuckass carbon#jack and joker#jack and joker u steal my heart
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