#this was actually really hard and took me ages haha

[chahnniesroom]

coming up roses

pairing: bang chan x female reader

summary: most of the time, you're grateful to have such a good relationship with your older brother, minho. but when you find yourself falling for his best friend, chan, you can't help but be worried how he'll react when he finds out. you soon find yourself struggling with the unexpected consequences of keeping your feelings a secret.

word count: 10.2k

tags/warnings: hanahaki!au (read a/n), brother's best friend!au, hurt/comfort, angst, lots of fluffy sibling dynamics between minho and y/n, bad communication by the reader, mentions of: coughing, blood, and vomiting

read it on ao3 | masterlist

a/n: i have finally written my hanahaki au!!! this took me ages, but i really really wanted to write a fic based on how this post describes hanahaki because i love this interpretation (hanahaki is from supressing feelings instead of unrequited love) a lot more than how it's usually written (not that that version is bad!). i actually wish i could have drawn this out more, but didn't have it in me haha

the phrase "it's all coming up roses" means that everything is going well with someone and i thought it was so perfectly ironic for a hanahaki fic where a character actually has roses coming up in the literal sense.

Minho has always been protective. You had felt cool and invincible as a child, having an older brother that was willing to have your back and scare away anybody that teased you. 

You’re grateful that he cares enough to be so involved in your life, but now that you’re in university, you can’t help but feel a little stifled. Minho takes his role as an older brother very seriously, especially since the two of you have moved out of your family home and are sharing an apartment closer to campus. It's a mixture of doting and enough teasing to drive you crazy.

Growing up, your family home had been the regular haunt of Minho and his friends. It was more common than not to get home from cram school and find the boys either lingering in the nearest convenience store or hanging out in your apartment. You wouldn't say that you were friends with the boys, but you were at least familiar enough that you would say hi to them if you saw them in the hallways and they would offer to walk home with you if you were ever leaving school at the same time.

Starting university had been hard for you, most of your friends had ended up moving to other cities or even going abroad. You, however, had decided to stick closer to home. Your program had a good reputation and your parents had promised that they would help you and Minho get an apartment close to campus as long as you lived together. Minho had readily agreed, he had commuted for his first year and had always complained about how long it took.

It was a difficult adjustment, moving out of your family home, balancing your course load, and making friends. Unlike Minho, who had used dance to find his close group of friends, you didn't have any hobbies that you were particularly passionate about and you weren't naturally outgoing or charismatic.

Especially in the first few weeks of classes, it feels like such a relief whenever you see one of Minho's friends that you latch onto them. It’s kind of awkward at first, especially because you don’t know his friends well enough to speak with them casually, but they get used to your presence. You would even consider some of them to be your friend, especially Seungmin, who shares a class with you, and Chan who usually has his lunch break at the same time as you.

You make your own friends eventually, slowly getting to know some of the people that share your program, but you’re definitely a lot closer to the boys than you were prior to university. While you spent most of your childhood calling Minho and his friends lame, you can now admit that you enjoy spending time with them, although you’d never say it to Minho’s face.

Still, Minho doesn’t always approve of who or where you hang out. Sometimes he’s even nosier than your parents were, always asking you about your schedule and calling when you’re out late. He warns you about spending time one-on-one with men and makes sure that you always have your location shared with him. You tolerate it for the most part, knowing that it’s his way of showing that he cares about you, but sometimes you just find him overbearing.

—

“I’m going out next Saturday,” Minho tells you one evening as you step out of your room to get a glass of water. “You’ll have to figure out something for dinner on your own.”

“Oh,” you say, suddenly a little nervous. “I uh- I also have plans that night.”

“Sure,” he agrees easily. “What are you going to be doing?”

“There’s a party that I was invited to,” you say, biting your lip when you see Minho freeze. You turn your gaze to the ground, but you can still feel Minho's stare intensify. 

“What party,” he demands, not even bothering to frame it as a question.

“Does it matter?” you whine, annoyed by how protective Minho is. It’s even worse that you have an audience, Chan is over and you can see out of the corner of your eye that he’s watching your conversation curiously.

“Yes.” His tone leaves no room for argument.

“I think it's at Taehoon's,” your voice is barely a whisper. Minho hears you anyway.

“Taehoon?” He repeats in disbelief. You glance up briefly. Minho's ears are flushed bright red and the tendons in his neck are standing out. He's furious. “Taehoon, who is four years older than you? Taehoon, who holds off-campus parties?”

You grimace and don't respond. There’s no way that he’s going to let you go, you resign yourself to a weekend stuck in your room watching dramas while your friends enjoy themselves. 

It’s bad enough that you had to mention Taehoon, who doesn’t have the best reputation, but you’ve forgotten that Minho would easily be able to recognize the type of party that he throws. You haven’t been to many university parties, but even you know that without the dorm restrictions, off-campus parties are often the wildest and were harder to get invited to. It’s not that you particularly care to attend this party in specific, you just don’t want to miss out since all of your friends will be there.

“Minho,” Chan steps in, clasping a heavy hand on your brother's shoulder.

“Who invited you,” Minho seethes, shaking Chan off.

“Just one of my friends,” you deflect.

“Minho,” Chan says again, this time jostling Minho enough that he turns his attention away from you finally. Your body sags in relief. “Chill, we're going to Taehoon's next weekend. It's just a party.”

“Yes, we are going. Not my baby sister! Y/n-ah, the answer is no.”

“Oppa!” you complain. “I'm not a baby anymore!”

“You don't know anything,” Minho hisses at you. 

“We were going to way crazier parties when we were Y/n's age,” Chan interrupts one more time. “Come on, at least we'd be able to keep an eye on her.”

Minho is about to reply when he stops and tilts his head in thought.

“Okay,” he says slowly, turning back to you with a gleam in his eye. “You can go, Y/n.”

“Really?” you brighten instantly even though you’re a little bit suspicious of his sudden change in heart.

Your breath catches in your throat as you excitedly make eye contact with Chan. He winks at you teasingly before turning his full attention back to Minho, who thankfully hadn’t noticed.

“You're coming with us,” Minho says, nodding decisively.

“Are you kidding me,” you reply flatly, all enthusiasm vanishing instantly.

“Yes. I'll make sure that everybody knows not to mess with you and you still can have fun with your silly little friends. Unless you don't want to go anymore?” Minho raises an eyebrow at you.

“Fine, I'll go with you,” you grumble.

“It'll be fun, Y/n! I promise that I won’t let Minho embarrass you,” Chan says, slinging an arm around your shoulder. You try not to shiver as he leans in to whisper to you, close enough that you can almost feel his lips touching your ear. “Don’t worry, I’ll make sure to find something or someone to distract him enough that he’ll forget you’re even there.”

“Okay,” you breathe shakily.

“Hey!” Minho pulls Chan off of you and into a headlock. “Whatever you’re scheming, cut it out. Y/nnie, don’t listen to a single thing this idiot tells you.”

“I try not to listen to idiots,” you say. “That’s why I never follow any of the advice that you give me!”

“Y/n-ah-” Minho starts.

You stick out your tongue at him childishly then dart to your room, slamming the door and locking it behind you so that Minho can’t follow you. The sound of Chan’s resulting laugh echoes through your head for the rest of the day.

—

By the time the weekend rolls around, you're a little worried that you’ve caught a cold. Your throat is achy and talking too much makes you cough, but you're not feeling any other symptoms so you don't think you're actually sick. Minho wasn't exactly pleased when you told him you were still planning on going, but he kept his word and didn't try to convince you otherwise.

Your friends are all getting ready together at one of their dorms, but your brother was adamant that he wanted you to go to the party with him and his friends. You're more comfortable getting changed and doing your makeup at home anyway, so it's not a big deal, but it's still not the same. 

Conversation pauses when you finally exit your room. Only Chan, Hyunjin, and Minho are still in the living area since most of Minho's friends are crowded around your apartment's entryway, shuffling to get their jackets and put on their shoes.. Their eyes widen and you see Hyunjin choke on the drink he had just taken a sip of. You tug at the hem of your skirt slightly, suddenly feeling self conscious. 

You've worn this outfit before with friends and while it's definitely not the most conservative option in your closet, it's nowhere near as revealing as what you expect other girls will be wearing. It's just that you're not used to being around Minho's friends when you've put so much effort into your appearance and are showing off a bit of skin. They’ve seen you at your worst and are most familiar with the comfortable sweats and hoodies that you usually wear around your home.

Minho recovers the fastest. In a flash, he's made his way to you and has a death grip on your arm, trying to drag you back into your room. You resist, digging your heels in to try and make it harder for him, but it barely even slows him down.

“Oppa!”

“You are not leaving looking like this,” Minho huffs through gritted teeth.

“Minho-ya, come on. We're going to be late if you make her change,” Chan calls out. It draws the attention of the rest of the boys, who turn to look at the commotion. You hear Jisung wolf-whistle teasingly which only makes things worse. Minho's hand tightens even more around you, hard enough that you're sure it's going to bruise, and he whips around to glare at Jisung.

“Hyung, it's fine. Y/n-ah looks good,” Seungmin chimes in, before winking at you. You groan internally, knowing from the look in his eye that you're not going to like what he says next. “Is there a boy that you're trying to impress tonight?”

“No!” you deny immediately, still trying to pull your arm from your brother's grip to no avail. Your chest tightens at the idea of being forced to stay at home. Minho immediately latches onto the idea that Seungmin has thrown out, his expression darkening even further.

“Is it true?” he questions you.

“Oppa, I promise, I'm just matching with my friends. Which you would know if we actually go to the party!”

“If there is, you better tell me,” he warns.

“Yes, yes,” you groan. “If there was, which there isn't! You're just wasting time now.”

“At least put on a jacket, you’re going to be cold.”

“Fine.” You wrench your arm out of Minho's grasp and stalk to your room. You grab the first jacket you see, intent on ditching it the second that you get to the party, then head straight to the door, breezing past Minho on your way. “Happy now?”

“Thrilled,” he says in a flat voice that says he is anything but.

—

Your apartment is not too far away from the party, so it’s not long before everyone is unloading from their cars and approaching the party. You can hear the bass pounding even from outside the building and you’re sure that there will be a number of neighbours that file noise complaints by the end of the night.

When you make it in, your friends greet you enthusiastically, but are all a little bit weird, fixing their hair more than usual and giggling nervously. You’re not close with all of the girls that are in the group, some of them you can’t even recall if you’ve met before, but you can still tell that everyone is acting strangely. 

It's not until you turn around that you realise that Minho has practically stationed himself behind you and is glowering at anybody who looks your way too long. After years of being on the receiving end of his glares, you’ve grown immune, but everybody else is clearly at least a little intimidated.

“Oppa,” you hiss. He barely spares you a glance. “You're not seriously going to babysit me all night, are you?”

“I'm letting you do what you want so you should let me do whatever I want,” he replies primly. 

You know there's no convincing him on your own. From across the room, you manage to catch Chan's eye and nod your head in Minho's direction. Luckily, he knows exactly what you're trying to say and makes his way over quickly to stand beside Minho.

“Minho-ya, you don't have a drink yet?” he asks, before pointedly taking a sip of his own cup.

“I asked Yongbokkie and Seungmin to make me one,” he replies, unphased.

“And you trust them that much?”

At the same time, the two of them glance over to the kitchen. You follow their gaze to find Felix, Seungmin, as well as Jisung mixing together a concoction that looks not only toxic, but also disgusting. You want to gag when you see them add in soju, hot sauce, milk, and maraschino cherries in quick succession. That’s not even considering whatever they’ve already put into the cup before you looked over. There's no way they actually think the combination could taste good and Minho must agree because he stands up and starts stalking towards them, swearing to himself the whole time.

After Minho leaves, Chan wanders a bit closer to you and brushes a hand against your shoulder lightly. You have to fight the urge to lean into his touch.

“I told you, I got you tonight. Don't worry about your brother breathing down your neck,” he says lowly. Just like when he first promised to distract your brother, Chan winks at you, then follows after Minho.

You force yourself not to stare after him, cheeks flushing as the rest of the girls squeal. Some of your friends have met Minho in passing a couple times, but not any of his friends. Your brother's dance crew has become wildly popular this year, but luckily it's not widely known that you are close with them. You prefer to keep it that way, but it seems like revealing your relation to them is unavoidable tonight. It's just your luck that some of these girls are among the ‘fans’ that your brother has somehow amassed.

“Y/nnie,” a girl beside you pouts. “How come you've never mentioned you know Lee Minho and Bang Chan before? I can't believe you've never introduced him to us!”

“I-” you splutter, still flustered by how close Chan was to you.

“I saw you show up with all eight of them,” another girl interupts. Someone else gasps as if you've committed a serious crime. “You actually know them?”

“Well, yeah-”

“I heard that you called Minho oppa, are you two dating?” the first girl asks.

“What? No!” you quickly deny, disgusted by the very thought of that.

“Oh come on, you don't think that they're ridiculously attractive?” someone else chimes in. The whole group murmurs in agreement. They have more and more questions for you and start to talk over each other.

“Minho's my brother! As in, we share the same parents, that’s why I call him oppa.” you exclaim, before things can spiral further. “And ew, he is definitely not attractive!”

The group is stunned into silence for a moment before exploding in noise. There are girls offended on Minho’s behalf, some asking what him and his friends are like, and others who beg you to introduce them.

Your best friend chooses that moment to speak up, reminding you why she is one of your favourite people in the world.

“Let’s play a drinking game!” she exclaims loudly. She holds up a couple bottles of soju that you’re not sure where she’s been hiding and starts filling up everyone’s cup. Luckily the girls are easily distracted by alcohol, enough that the topic is changed without too much of a fuss. You breathe out a sigh of relief.

—

After a few drinks, you eventually excuse yourself to the bathroom. You’re definitely on your way to being tipsy, but not enough that you feel unsteady on your feet. The loud music makes it a bit difficult to focus and people have filled every corner of the house, but you’re somehow able to find an unoccupied bathroom.

You take an extra moment to splash yourself with water before you leave, you’re feeling a bit sticky from sweating and when one of your friends spilled a bit of their drink on you. When you finish, you swing open the door and immediately apologise when you narrowly miss hitting a guy who has been waiting in the hall. He waves it off, but doesn’t make a move to enter the bathroom, instead stepping a bit closer to you. 

“What’s a pretty little girl like you doing here all on her own?” he slurs, crowding further into your personal space. It’s dark, but you can still tell that his eyes are red and unfocused and hair is matted to his forehead. He's drunk. 

You swallow hard, trying not to panic. You have to treat this situation delicately and somehow make your disinterest clear without provoking or offending him.

“I’m not alone.” You can’t help but laugh nervously, taking a step back. Your stomach churns when your shoulder knocks into the wall behind you and you realise you have nowhere else to go. “My friends are actually probably wondering what’s taking me so long, I’ll just-”

“S’okay, I’m sure they wouldn’t notice if you were gone a little longer.” He leans in until he’s close enough that you can smell the sourness of his sweat and the alcohol on his breath. “I just wanna get t’know you a bit better.”

He smiles down at you in a way that he must think is attractive. It makes you want to vomit.

“No thanks, I’m just going to head-” Your voice is shrill with panic, you can barely recognize it.

You try to shuffle to the side, but the guy slaps his hand against the wall, trapping you even more. Your heartbeat pounds in your chest. He reaches out and traces one of your cheeks with a clumsy hand, ignoring the way that you cringe away.

“Aww c’mon darling, don’t be like that. I can promise you a good time.”

You know a bit of self defense, but this is far from a fair fight. This guy is significantly taller than you and probably double your weight. Even drunk, he can likely overpower you without even trying.

Before you can make a move, an arm slings around the drunk guy’s shoulder, jostling him to the side. Your heart sinks. There was a small chance that you’d have been able to escape, but not if you’re outnumbered.

“Hey mate,” the new person says. Your head shoots up at the familiar voice. Chan. “You seem pretty sloshed.”

Chan nudges the guy again, this time creating a little space that makes you feel less trapped. His body language is loose and relaxed, but the expression on his face is another story. His gaze is intense as he scans you, softening by a fraction when you nod that you’re fine.

“M’not,” the guy argues. He squints up at Chan. “Do I even know you? Get lost, I’m busy right now.”

“Why don’t you go outside and get some air? It’s gotten pretty stuffy in here.” It’s not a suggestion. Chan’s words are friendly, but the tone of his voice sends shivers down your spine.

The guy opens his mouth, likely to protest, but promptly shuts it when he sees the look on Chan’s face. The two of you watch as he stumbles away without a fight, bumping into a few other people in his haste to leave. Now that you’re alone, Chan backs up, giving you more space to breathe.

“Sorry about that,” Chan says, hand scratching at the back of his neck nervously. “Didn't want to be too aggressive. It just- you looked like you needed some help.”

“Some people just don’t know how to take no for an answer,” you say quietly. It’s just another thing to be grateful for when Chan doesn’t comment on the shakiness of your voice. Instead, his expression darkens further before he composes himself.

“Are you okay?” he asks tentatively. 

“Yeah, you came at just the right time.” You look away, a bit embarrassed that he had to step in and rescue you, but he puts a finger under your chin and uses it to turn your face back to him. It feels so different from when the drunk guy touched you that you don’t want him to stop. His eyes search yours for a moment and whatever he finds must satisfy him.

“You should probably rejoin your friends.” Chan starts to step away, but you reach out and snag his sleeve before he can go. 

“Chan-oppa.”

He pauses, turning back to look at you again.

“Yeah?” There’s a hopeful lilt to his voice, although you’re not sure what he’s hoping you say.

“Please don’t tell my brother about this,” you plead. Chan’s expression drops a little, clearly that’s not what he wanted to hear, but he’s still quick to reassure you.

“No, yeah, of course. I won’t say anything.”

“I don’t want him to worry about me.”

“Of course,” Chan repeats.

“And… thank you.” You rise up on your toes and kiss his cheek quickly, then slip away towards where your friends are before you can see what his reaction is. 

—

It takes a few days for you to recover from the party. You hadn’t drunk enough to be hungover, but just remembering your interaction with Chan makes you want to bury yourself in your bed and never leave. Luckily Minho hasn't questioned your change in behaviour much, but you can tell that he's getting sick of your wallowing, even if he doesn't know the reason behind it. 

“Yah, Y/n-ah!” Minho bangs on your door. “We’re heading out for gukbap in 5 minutes, are you coming?”

He doesn’t specify who the ‘we’ is, you know who to expect. Of course, Chan is included. It’s easy to make a decision.

“Go without me!” you yell back.

“Eh? Open up.”

“Just come in, it’s unlocked.”

You hear the door open and Minho approaches. He prods at your prone form with one of his feet.

“What’s up with you? You never say no to gukbap.”

“Nothing!” you groan.

“You’ve been acting strange since that stupid party, what are you hiding?” He pokes at you again, this time a bit harder.

“Oppa,” you complain, lifting yourself out of your blankets to swat at his foot. “I promise that I have nothing to hide, I just don’t feel like hanging out with your friends today.”

“They haven’t done anything, have they?” Minho asks, eyes narrowing in suspicion. “Channie-hyung asked me if you were doing okay.”

“No! I-” you choke on your spit in your haste to answer, leading to a coughing fit that leaves you with tears gathering in your eyes. You clear your throat roughly then continue. “No, Chan-oppa and the rest of your friends have all been nice to me.”

“Oppa?” 

Whoops, you hadn’t meant for that to slip out.

“What?” you whine. “You’re the one who forces me to hang out with them all the time! You told me to stop being so formal around them. They kept telling me too, it got really annoying.”

“Hmm,” Minho huffs, not quite convinced.

“Really,” you insist. “I just don’t want to go out today, I promise.”

“Okay,” Minho says reluctantly before he gets uncharacteristically serious. “But you know, you're my little sister, you can always come to me if something or someone is bothering you right?”

“I- yeah of course, oppa.” You feel kind of touched, not used to Minho openly showing that he cares about you, even though you know he does. It's enough that your throat feels tight with emotion, but you force yourself to speak through it. “Thank you. I always know that I can count on you.”

“I'm the only one allowed to mess with you,” he says sweetly, ruffling your hair so that it sticks up the way he knows you hate. “If anyone else does, I'll make sure that they regret the day that they were born.”

You try to ignore the guilt that curls in your stomach as you watch Minho leave. You hate hiding things from him, but you're still confused by your own emotions and you're worried by how he'll react.  Minho has always been your biggest supporter in everything except for your love life, which he is strictly against no matter how much you try to reason with him. 

You can’t imagine how much worse it would be if he found out that the person you’re interested in is one of his friends. You’ve heard him warn the whole group that you were off limits. He’d use a joking tone, but everyone knew that he was actually serious about it.

In the end, it doesn’t even matter because you’re almost certain that nothing will ever come of your feelings, Chan is way out of your league so there’s no point in even imagining a relationship together.

—

Unsurprisingly, your attempts to avoid Chan fail pretty much instantly. You're not sure how the stars aligned exactly opposite to what you were hoping, but the studio that Minho's (and therefore Chan's) dance crew uses had a schedule conflict that ended up shifting their practice times.

To your dismay, it works out so that multiple times a week, you're leaving campus at the exact same time as your brother. That in itself is not much of an issue, it's the fact that Chan lives close enough to you that the three of you commute back together. To make matters worse, Minho always invites Chan over to have dinner and Chan always accepts.

You can't fault Minho though, you know that he invites him over partly because he wants to hang out with Chan and partly because he knows that Chan might end up working throughout the night in an empty apartment and completely forget to eat. It does also bring you comfort, knowing that Chan is being cared for, that he's eating well and taking time in his day to not worry about school or dance. It's also nice for you, you've grown so used to preparing and eating dinner on your own that it's started to feel more like a chore than something to look forward to.

It's just hard. You haven't had a private conversation with Chan since the party, but you know that he wants to talk to you. 

You were so sure that he would never reciprocate your feelings, but now, you're starting to doubt yourself.

While you're on the bus home, listening to your music, you sometimes glance over to find Chan staring at you, though he's quick to look away. When the three of you are cooking in the kitchen, he's more affectionate, resting a light hand on your waist or back when he passes behind you or nudging your shoulder playfully after he makes a joke. During dinner, he makes sure that you're also engaged in conversation, asking about your classes or the few clubs that you're involved in. He sometimes brings you and Minho little treats from the convenience store and they're always in your favourite flavours.

The thing is, Chan is friendly and generous to everyone that he meets. It's hard to tell if you're reading too much into your interactions with him or if he's actually paying you more interest than usual. You've never heard of Chan dating, actually you can't recall if any of the boys in Minho's dance crew have ever had partners, but it's not for a lack of interested parties.

At times, it feels so impossible that you're embarrassed to even admit to yourself how much you like Chan. You're not blind, you know that there's a fair share of girls who are just as delusional as you are, giggling when he looks over and insisting to their friends that he's interested in them because he helped open the door for them or waved as he walked past.

In fact, some of the very moments that you keep closest to your heart sound so similar to experiences that you've heard other girls gushing about that you hate yourself for having hope that Chan would be interested in you of all people.

It's easier to pretend that there's nothing going on between the two of you. You know that if you were to confess your feelings to Chan, something you would never do, that he would be nice about it. You can almost imagine it, how flustered he would be, making up some kind of excuse about not being interested in dating because he was too devoted to school and dance. He would promise not to tell your brother about it and assure you that it wouldn't change the way that he treats you.

You've run through this hypothetical situation so many times that not only have you experienced enough mortification for a lifetime, but you've convinced yourself even further to lock your feelings up inside of you. There's no point in confessing when you're so sure that nothing will ever come from it.

—

One day, Chan is over as usual and the three of you are cooking in your tiny kitchen, elbows bumping and arms reaching over as everyone tries to make do with the small space available. 

The food is almost ready when Minho's phone rings, the special song that he has saved for Jisung. He picks it up instantly, shoving the pair of chopsticks that he's using into your hands in his haste. You can't hear what Jisung says, but Minho rolls his eyes and leaves to his bedroom, lecturing Jisung about something the whole way there.

“Hey,” Chan says softly. You try to keep yourself busy, picking up dishes and putting them into the sink for washing, but he tugs at your wrist lightly so that you face him. “Is everything good with you?”

“Yeah,” you say, nodding quickly. 

“You just seem, I don't know, distracted or something these days.”

“No, it's-” You take a deep breath to collect yourself. “Thank you for asking, really. But I'm fine.”

“Okay,” Chan says, still looking concerned. “Listen, I know we haven't-”

You've never been so glad to hear Minho re-enter the room. 

“Eh? You guys haven't even finished with the food?” he complains in a whiny voice that he only really uses around Chan. “What have you guys been doing this whole time? Come on, Y/n-ah, go set the table. Hyung, I know you can't cook to save your life, but at least scoop out the rice into our bowls. I'm hungry!”

Chan drops the subject for the rest of the night, but you know that you’ve only delayed the conversation. 

—

The next day, you wake up to a dry and achy throat. This isn’t that unusual, you suffer from seasonal allergies that sometimes block your nose and force you to breathe through your mouth as you sleep. This time, it feels different. Your throat has been bothering you more than usual the past couple of weeks and while drinking a glass of water does help you wake up, it doesn’t dull the pain that persists. 

You shuffle out of bed to wash up, then head straight to the kitchen, brewing yourself a steaming mug of yuja tea. The taste is comforting, but doesn't help as much as you hoped it would. 

You get ready for school quickly, hoping to leave before Minho wakes up. You know that your classes start before him today, but he's always been an early riser, preferring to work out or spend time in the dance studio before it gets too busy.

“Y/n-ah,” Minho calls out, right as you're starting to put on your shoes. “You were going to leave without saying bye?”

“I didn’t know if you were awake,” you say, wincing when your voice still sounds rough.

“You didn’t even check.” Minho steps out of his room and unlocks the front door for you as you pull on your backpack.

“I was in a rush-” you start to say, but the rest of your sentence doesn’t manage to make its way out. Clearing your throat only irritates it further, triggering a cough that you can’t contain.

“Y/n,” Minho says, genuine concern shining in his eyes. “Are you feeling okay?”

He raises a hand to your forehead, but you slap it away weakly before he can check your temperature.

“I'm fine, I just have this stupid sore throat that won’t go away,” you reassure him. “I don’t think I’m sick though. The air has been so dry lately, I think I need a humidifier in my room while I sleep.”

“Aww.” Minho pinches your cheek and goes straight back to teasing you. “My delicate baby sister.”

“Ugh, forget I said anything.” You push your brother away. “Now let me go, I'm going to be late for class.”

Minho doesn't say anything in response, but the next night when you go to sleep, a new humidifier has been installed on your bedside table. 

—

In the next few weeks you find that the discomfort in your throat that has been plaguing you has evolved into something else. There’s a persistent feeling of something caught in your throat and you find yourself with a lingering dry cough that no amount of tea or medication can relieve.

One night, you wake up feeling like you can't breathe. In a panic, you untangle yourself from your sheets and get yourself into a sitting position. The change in position allows a deep cough to rattle through you, enough that you’re finally able to suck in a breath. 

Instead of phlegm or maybe a piece of food that could have been stuck in your throat, you feel something velvety in your mouth. You blindly reach for your bedside table to turn on your lamp and wonder if you’re still asleep when you find a single, dark red rose petal in the palm of your hand.

You squeeze your eyes shut and pinch yourself, hard, but when your eyes open, nothing has changed.

Suddenly, you’re wide awake and a cold sweat starts to form, making your pyjamas stick to your back.

You’ve heard of hanahaki disease, of course you have, but you’ve never known someone who has suffered from it. 

It makes sense, you’ve had a sore, scratchy throat and dry cough for weeks now with no other cold symptoms.

You can’t believe it though. 

Hanahaki disease was almost like an urban legend at this point, having been exaggerated and twisted so much in media that you’ve almost forgotten the reality of it. While most of the shows and books that cover this have a somewhat romantic take on it, declaring that it's caused by unrequited love, you know the real cause is your refusal to admit your feelings.

You knew that lying, to Chan, to your brother, to yourself, would have consequences. You had heard stories about how people who kept their feelings a secret were slowly choked by them, petals and leaves representing every time you had held yourself back. 

You just never thought it would happen to you.

Sure, you were interested in Chan. You found him kind, hard-working, funny, and attractive, but it's not like you were in love with him.

You crumple the petal in your hand and throw it into your garbage can. If this is your first time finding petals, you still have months until things progress to be more serious. A part of you hopes that this was some sort of one-off, that this would be the first and last time your body creates any flowers.

You turn off the light and pull the covers tightly over your body, praying that you'll wake up in the morning and find that this was all some crazy stress-related dream.

You don’t fall asleep for the rest of the night.

—

You had thought that you were pretty good at covering up your tracks, but it doesn’t take long before Minho starts piecing things together. It doesn't help over the past few days, your symptoms have steadily worsened. You’ve found yourself coughing up petals every day, enough that you're starting to grow concerned about how quickly things are progressing.

It starts when he calls you into your shared bathroom one evening. You don’t think much of it, until you find him staring at something on the ground.

“What’s this?” he asks. 

“It’s a rose petal,” you say easily, stooping down to pinch it between two fingers and dangle it in front of his face. “You’ve never seen one before?”

Minho rolls his eyes at that, swatting at you half-heartedly. You manage to dodge out of the way, but lose your grip on the petal. It flutters to the floor, but Minho swipes it out of the air.

“What’s it from? Is a boy giving you flowers?” he asks warningly, crushing the petal in his grip.

“Oppa, stop jumping to conclusions!” you groan. “It’s from a bath bomb that I tried out, I guess I missed this one when I was cleaning up.”

“Since when do you take baths?” 

“Since I got a bunch of bath bombs on sale. I thought it would be relaxing.” This time you’re the one rolling your eyes. “But if I knew that it would lead to you interrogating me, I wouldn’t have bothered buying them in the first place.”

“Fine, sorry, just- just clean up next time you’re going to make a mess in the bathroom,” Minho says, before throwing the petal at you and leaving you alone.

You watch as the petal falls onto the tiles, crumpled into a little ball from being in Minho’s fist. When you reach out to pick it up, your fingers are trembling. You’ve never been a good liar, but it seems that at least this time, your acting skills have been good enough to fool Minho.

You hear the front door close and you finally give in to the cough that you've been trying to suppress the whole conversation. 

Tears spring to your eyes, but you can't stop the coughs that wrack your body. This time, even after you spit out a couple of petals, it still feels like there’s something stuck in your throat. After what feels like forever, that something dislodges and you find yourself holding a tiny rosebud complete with a short stem.

You stare at it in horror, you haven’t had more than petals until now. There’s a deep sense of dread that fills you. You thought that you’d have more time, it hasn’t even been a month since you had started coughing up anything.

You throw the flower into the toilet, flushing quickly so that the red petals swirl out of sight. Even after you rinse your mouth, there’s a tinge of iron that lingers.

—

You don't often visit the boys when they're at dance practice, in fact you actively avoid going to the studio. It's one thing to know that their dance crew is quite popular and another to experience it yourself.

But today you don't have much of a choice, in your rush to leave for an early lab, you completely forgot to pack an assignment that was due the same morning and had begged Minho to bring it to campus for you. You were lucky that he hadn't left the apartment yet, but he only brought it on the condition that you brought him coffee and picked your assignment up from him directly. 

It's just before 10am when you head over, which means that there's a lot of students waiting for their dance class to start, but it still surprises you to find a fairly significant crowd outside of the studio that Minho had texted you to go to. You can hear music faintly from the closed door and, as you push your way closer, find that there's a large horizontal window that has caught everyone's attention.

You get more than a fair share of dirty looks as you squeeze through the crowd and one girl even stops you as you move to open the door. 

“Sorry, excuse me,” you say politely.

“You're not allowed in,” she says in a haughty voice. Her acrylic nails bite into your arm, surprisingly strong for how thin she is. “Their practice isn't over.”

“You're not allowed in, I don’t need an invitation,” you say under your breath, rolling your eyes. You must not have said it quietly enough because she gasps dramatically.

“Please, you think you're special?” She looks you up and down dismissively. “You wish any of the boys would talk to someone like you.”

“You must be referring to yourself, they would never want to have to associate with someone as desperate and pathetic as you,” you snap, shouldering your way past her. She squeals, but finally lets go of you, maybe hoping that you'll get in trouble for interrupting.

You open the door just enough to slide through and carefully close it behind you so that you don’t disturb them. It’s mesmerizing, watching them all dance. They’ve been together for so long that it looks so natural for them to move in sync, although you know it’s more to do with long hours of practice and Minho’s eagle eyes pointing out any mistakes. 

None of the boys notice you at first, caught up in the chorus of the song that they're practicing, but Jeongin catches sight of you after a moment.

“Noona!” he says excitedly, abandoning the dance to run over to you. “Is that coffee for me?”

“Innie if you drink that coffee you will not survive long enough for the caffeine to make it into your bloodstream,” your brother warns from across the room. 

Jeongin falters at that, but when you shake the cup enticingly in front of him, he throws caution to the wind and takes a sip.

“Yah! What did I say, Yang Jeongin?” Is the only warning Jeongin gets before he’s chased around the room by an angry Minho. The familiar chaos is almost enough to lift your mood and make you forget about the terrible interaction you had outside.

“You look annoyed, did something happen?” Chan asks, approaching you from where he had gone to turn off the music on his laptop. You curse how observant he is, you thought you had done a pretty good job of hiding how you felt.

“Nothing, just had a weird encounter with a defensive fan out there. It's like you guys are idols or something” you joke, nodding your head towards the window where people are watching curiously. You can still feel the sting from the girl’s nails digging into your wrist and when you lift it up to examine it more closely, see a little bit of blood beading at the deepest crescents.

“They’re not fans,” Chan says in disgust, before he does a double take. “I- you’re bleeding?”

“It’s nothing,” you say quickly, wiping at the wounds but only succeeding at smudging the blood so that it looks even worse. “It doesn’t even hurt.”

“Come here, we have a first aid kit somewhere. We don’t want it to get infected.” 

Chan takes your hand delicately, making sure to avoid the inflamed areas, and leads you over to the bench closest to where all their bags are piled up. You sneak a glance over to the girl that stopped you and can’t help but feel smug when you find her, pale and slack-jawed. Chan sits you down, only leaving your side to pull the blinds down on the window and dig around until he finds the first aid kit.

“Sorry, it might sting a bit,” Chan apologises as he pulls out the disinfectant wipes.

You peek at Chan and your breath catches in your throat at how concentrated he looks, brows slightly furrowed as he tries to gently dab at the scratches. Most of his hair is hidden under a baseball cap, but you can see a little duck tail forming at the base of his neck which draws attention to the trails of sweat that disappear under the collar of his shirt. You must make some kind of noise, because Chan looks up, eyes wide with concern.

“Sorry, does it hurt a lot?”

“No, you're good,” you say, cheeks flushing.

“I’m almost done,” he says, searching around for a bandage. He’s just finished applying it, tongue sticking out in concentration, when you hear someone else approach.

“What's going on here?” Minho asks.

“Nothing!” you say at the same time that Chan says, “I was just helping Y/n put on a bandage.”

“Did you hurt yourself?” Minho's eyes widen and he reaches out to take a look at your wrist, even though he won't be able to see anything under the bandage. You pull your sleeve down and stand up in a rush.

“It’s nothing, really oppa! I'm sorry, I have to go, my class is starting soon!” you call out, lying through your teeth as you run out of the room, clutching your assignment. “Thank you, Channie-oppa!”

You rush into the nearest bathroom, not even caring that there are people in the other stalls, and throw up an explosion of petals. By the time that you finally make it to class, just in time, your throat stings more than the wound on your wrist.

—

You start trying to avoid Minho and well, you never really stopped in your attempts to avoid Chan.

You leave early in the morning, only come back well after the sun has set, and do everything in your power to contain your cough when you're at home.

You know you're not solving the problem, only prolonging it, but every conversation, every lie, seems to accelerate the growth of the roses that have taken up residence in your lungs. You know that it's not helping, that keeping this secret is just strengthening the flowers that are slowly choking you. It's just that no matter how many conversations you've rehearsed in your head or text that you've drafted, something seems to stop you.

You're just so so scared that waking up with a mouthful of petals and thorns, bloody coughing fits that you can't prevent, and the raspy tone of your voice that has developed is preferrable. 

As much as you hate him sometimes, you've looked up to your brother for your whole life. You don't know what you would do without him that the thought of losing him terrifies you beyond belief.

You don't always get what you want, though. It's not long until Minho confronts you again.

It's not really a surprise, when you look in the mirror these days, you're shocked by your appearance. Your face is pale and drawn, you have deep bags from not being able to sleep at night, and you've lost weight since most solid food irritates your throat enough to trigger a coughing fit. Add that to the fact that you know your apartment's walls are paper thin which means it's impossible that your brother can't hear you coughing at all hours of the day.

“Y/n-ah. I know that you're not doing well right now. Don't even try to deny it,” Minho says. He closes his eyes for a moment before seemingly deciding something. “I- you don't have to tell me what it is. I would prefer it if you did, but just- what can I do to help?”

You take a deep breath, preparing yourself to reassure him that you're fine, but regret it when you start choking instead. You lurch upright and head directly to the bathroom, Minho trailing behind you worriedly. 

“I-” Trying to talk just makes it worse. You're used to it now, the way that the thorns seem to claw at your throat on their way up, how even the brush of soft petals against the raw flesh hurts, the metallic taste that you can't seem to get rid of no matter how many times you wash your mouth. Still, it doesn't make it easier.

Minho watches in silence as you heave over the toilet. He puts a hand on your back, rubbing slow circles to try and soothe some of your pain. Your eyes water, partially from coughing and partly because you're mortified that your brother is finally witnessing this.

You throw up finally, mostly petals and blood, which is a relief. The stems have been the most painful by far, each thorn digging into the already abused flesh of your throat.

When you finally finish rinsing your mouth, he's holding out a tissue which you accept gratefully. Minho doesn't comment until you've finally caught your breath.

“Y/n-ah-”

“Yeah,” you say miserably, tearing at the leftover tissue in your hand. Your voice both sounds and feels like you've been swallowing gravel. “Hanahaki, who would have guessed that I'd be a romantic at heart?”

You laugh weakly. Minho doesn't.

“I knew it. All those times you locked yourself in the bathroom with the water running… That stupid bath bomb story you told me… I hear you up at all hours, coughing your lungs out… You’ve been hiding it this whole time, haven’t you?” he accuses you.

“I can explain-”

“Go on then,” Minho says impatiently.

“I- It's-” You bury your face in your hands, unable to get the words out. “It's stupid.”

“Y/n-ah, it's obviously not stupid. Whatever it is, it's bothering you enough that it's hurting you physically.”

“I like someone,” you say in a small voice. “Okay? That's it.”

“Why won't you tell them?” Minho demands. “Why won't you tell me who it is?”

“No, I can't. There’s no point, it wouldn't work out,” you insist, shaking your head.

“What are you talking about? No point? Y/n, can't you see it's killing you.” You've never heard Minho sound so desperate. He's angry, he's frustrated, but most of all, he's scared, you realise.

“Oppa-” you say cautiously, but you're interrupted by yet another coughing fit. You can't hide it from your brother when the tissue that you've used to cover your mouth is tinged red by the time you're done. You can feel there's still something lodged in your throat, it takes everything in you to ignore the urge to continue coughing to try and get it out.

“I can't lose you, Y/n,” he whispers. Your eyes widen when you realise his are filled with tears. You don't think you've ever seen Minho cry. “I can't let you do this to yourself, please.”

“I need more time-”

“You don’t have time!” Minho interrupts frantically. “Have you even seen a doctor about this?”

You look away guiltily at the question.

“No, but-”

“Are you kidding me?” Minho says exasperatedly. “We’re booking you an appointment right now.”

“Is it going to make a difference? I know what’s wrong-” As if to prove your point, you can’t stop yourself from coughing again. “It's not that bad yet, oppa,” you lie, the croakiness of your voice giving you away.

“Y/n-”

“I promise! I promise that I am trying my best. I- if it doesn't get better, I'll see a doctor in two weeks.” 

“Not good enough, Y/n-ah. If you can't tell me, at least talk to whoever you like,” he pleads. 

“Fine,” you say. “I- I'll talk to him in the next few days. And if the flowers don't go away, then I will see a doctor.”

Minho lets out a heavy sigh of relief, pulling you into his arms for a tight hug. You try your best to sink into his embrace, but just can't ignore the guilt that seems to consume you.

—

Chan catches you outside your last lecture that night. You're not sure how exactly he found out your schedule, but you exit the lecture hall to find him leaning against the wall directly across from the doors.

It could just be that he knows someone else taking this course or that he has a class in the same room, but somehow you know that he's waiting for you. Not ready for this conversation, you try to keep your head down to pass by unnoticed, but you know that he's spotted you when he calls out your name.

“Hey.” Chan reaches out, tugging on your sleeve without actually touching you. You turn around, stomach sinking slightly. Yes, you had promised your brother that you'd confess to Chan, but you didn't think it would happen so soon. “You're heading home right?”

“Yeah,” you say warily. “What's up?”

“I'm going back too, can we walk together?”

“Sure,” you agree slowly, not able to think of a way to get out of this situation. 

The two of you walk in silence towards your bus stop. Chan's being uncharacteristically awkward and you're not sure what to expect.

“I wanted to talk to you about something,” he says suddenly.

“Okay?”

Chan stays quiet for so long that you’re about to ask if he’s okay.

“I like you,” he blurts out, right as you open your mouth to speak.

“What?” Of everything he could have said, this is what you're expecting the least. There’s no way that you heard him correctly, you must need to get your ears checked.

“I like you,” Chan repeats. You blink up at him, stunned. “But if you don't feel the same way, it's- don't worry about it. I promise that I'll respect it. I'll back off and everything will stay the same. I just wanted to get it off my chest. And maybe, I don't know if I was just making things up, but I thought that you liked me too?”

“You can't,” is all that escapes your mouth.

“I… can't like you?” Chan asks, baffled.

“No, it's- you can't- we can't,” you stammer. “My brother-"

“What, you think I'm afraid of Minho-ya?” Chan asks cockily, raising an eyebrow in a way that you can't help but find attractive.

“I just- he always said-”

“Y/n-ah,” Chan says gently. “I like you and I don't care what your dumb brother thinks. He can complain all he wants, but as long as you're happy, I'm happy. And-”

“You actually like me?” you interrupt.

“Yes, is it really so hard to believe?”

“I just always thought, you only saw me as Minho-oppa's baby sister,” you say glumly, kicking at the ground.

“I did when you were younger for sure,” Chan laughs. “But since university, I feel like I've actually gotten to know the real you, to see how funny, talented, kind, and thoughtful you are. I like you for you, not because I'm friends with your brother.” 

“But there's so many other girls you could choose from that are much prettier or smarter than me,” you argue, still not wanting to get your hopes up.

“Y/n-ah, are you actually trying to convince me not to like you?” Chan pouts. “If you don't feel the same way, just say so, it's okay.”

“No! I-” you trail off, suddenly feeling incredibly shy.

“You what?” Chan prompts you gently.

“I like you too.” Your voice is barely a whisper, but you know that he's heard you from the smile that grows on his face.

“What was that?” Chan asks cheekily.

“I said I like you too!” you say louder this time, before hiding your face in your hands so that you don't have to look at Chan. 

Even though you're beyond embarrassed, you feel better than you have in a long time, giddy with the idea that Chan actually reciprocates your feelings.

But when you breathe in, instead of relief, there's still that familiar tightness in your chest. 

You have to talk to Minho, you realise. As much as you've been keeping it a secret from Chan, you know that a majority of your inner turmoil stems from hiding our feelings from the closest person in your life. You had hoped that talking to Chan would instantly cure your hanahaki, but clearly you were wrong.

—

For the first time in weeks, you purposely seek out Minho. Luckily, you don't have to look far, when you get home, Minho is stretched out on the couch watching anime.

“I told him,” you say. Minho immediately sits upright, turning his attention to you. “The guy I like. But it didn’t help, the flowers are still-”

“And he feels the same way?” Minho interrupts you.

“I- yes, he’s the one that confessed first.”

“Wow,” Minho whistles. “Who’s crazy enough to have feelings for you?”

You had already made up your mind that you had to tell your brother, but his reaction makes you even more confident in your decision. Maybe it's the way that Minho is treating this so lightly, but you’re no longer nervous to say it out loud.

“It's Chan-oppa,” you say, bracing yourself. 

“Chan?” Minho repeats, shell shocked.

“Channie-hyung? Like-” he takes out his phone and pulls up the photo he has of Chan in his contacts.

Chan has the craziest bedhead and his face is puffy from sleep in the photo. He's squinting up at the camera, a hand coming up to try and block his face. He looks adorable.

Minho watches your face carefully as you visibly melt a bit looking at the picture.

“You really do like him, huh,” he says in a quiet voice, no longer joking around. “This whole time?”

“Yeah.” You look down. “I'm sorry.”

“That's it? That's the person you've been so scared of telling me that you liked?"

“I- yes? You don't think it's weird?” you ask tentatively, looking back up at your brother. “The two of us being together? He's one of your best friends.”

“Oh no, it’s definitely weird.” Minho laughs. “I do not understand it at all. But Y/n, Channie-hyung is one of the few people in my life that I trust. Do I want him to be dating my baby sister? Of course not! I don't want you to be dating anyone. Do I think he’s out of his mind for being interested in you? Definitely.”

“Hey!” you interject. Minho carries on like he can’t hear you.

“Do I think he fully understands that if he hurts you in any way, directly or indirectly, on purpose or on accident, that I will hunt him down and make him regret the fact that he ever existed in the first place? Yes, I think he knows.”

“Oppa,” you say in horror. “You will not give your best friend the shovel talk.”

“I don’t have to.” Minho smiles brightly, a picture of innocence if you didn’t know him. “My reputation precedes me. Channie-hyung's one of my closest friends, he would never expect anything less from me.”

“Oppa-”

“Y/n-ah,” Minho softens his voice. “I also know that of all the people that I've ever met, Channie-hyung is one that is least likely to ever hurt you. I trust him, but I also want you to know that I trust your judgement.”

You look away, sniffing. You never could have imagined that Minho would accept your relationship so easily that it's making you feel emotional.

“Aigoo, Y/nnie,” Minho coos. He pulls you into a tight hug, ignoring the way that tears finally escape from you and stain his shirt. “You were really worried about this, weren't you?”

You nod into his shoulder, unable to provide a verbal response.

“I'm sorry that I made you feel like you couldn't tell me about this. It's definitely going to take a bit of time to get used to it, but I'm happy for you, really. I know I can seem overbearing sometimes, but I just worry.”

“I didn't want you to be upset at Channie-oppa or me,” you murmur. “I didn't want to do anything to hurt your friendship. I didn't want to hurt our relationship.”

“Y/n-ah,” Minho says gently, but firmly. “I want you to know that there is nothing that could hurt our relationship. You're my baby sister, I'm always going to love you.”

After months of keeping all your feelings bottled up, of denying your feelings for Chan, of dreading Minho’s reaction, you’ve felt a constant dread, guilt filling your insides. Now, you’re just filled with an overwhelming sense of relief. It’s as if an enormous weight has been lifted off your shoulders.

It feels like you can breathe again.

read it on ao3 | masterlist

[f0point5]

i NEED jealous Max. Please 🥺🥺🥺 I love jealous/possessive guys haha the feminism just leaves my body

Me too! GOD. Me, too.

It took me ages to decide how to go about this because I had soooo many ideas but I hope you like it!

✨set during the Miami GP weekend 2022✨

Everybody wants you, but I don’t like a gold rush

Max glances down at his watch. 17 minutes. 17 minutes you’ve been standing in the gallery area of the garage, fanning yourself with a magazine - with Max’s face on the front of it, no less - in the Miami heat, talking to some freakishly tall guy in a Louis Vuitton denim jacket and aviator sunglasses. He’s so painfully American that Max wonders what you even have to talk about for…eighteen minutes.

You tighten your high ponytail while Paul Bunyon talks, his mouth wide with every word. Max studies your face for any sign that you’re bored. He’s bored of watching this, but he knows from experience that not looking isn’t a real option. You haven’t looked over at him once in those eighteen minutes, in fact you haven’t even been distracted by the mechanics moving around or the noise of drilling and clattering tools.

This guy must be really fucking interesting.

You smile at something Captain America says and Max feels his jaw clenched so hard he thinks a tooth is going to crack.

It’s like he’s thirteen again, watching you stand in the middle of the makeshift paddock at the karting track, swarmed by every one of his competitors, their parents packing up their stuff as they vie for your attention. He was the only one who stayed away, following his dad’s instructions on how to properly dismantle and store things while sneaking glimpses at the show you were running. He would win every race and still go home feeling like a loser.

It’s different now, of course. He doesn’t take your gregarious nature so personally now, and he can admit he understands what men see in you now, even if he doesn’t feel it. But he’d be lying if he said it doesn’t trigger something in him to see the way men react to you. It might irritate him less if you enjoyed it, but you’ve long since grown out of that. Now, you expect it so much that you ignore it, and Max has no choice to but to notice it, the same way you’d notice a rusty knife embedded in your side.

“You’re not listening to me, are you?” GP says, which snaps Max out of his calculations.

“I’m listening,” Max says, fiddling with the brim of his cap. “Drive fast, win race, I got it,”

GP frowns at his dismissive tone, and Max makes a point of looking at his water bottle, lest GP realise what actually had his attention. “Max, you need to focus. What are you even-“ It’s the sound of your laugh - high pitched over the deep bass of the music - that makes GP look across the garage. His features twist in disapproval as he turns back to Max. “You’ve got to be kidding me,”

Max looks down at his shoes, moving his foot as he inspects them. “What?”

Above him, GP groans. “I’m not going to say anything about the situation as a whole, because it’s waste of my time. But specifically now, she’s right there, she’s not going anywhere. Can we please just go through this once and then you can carry on staring?”

Max rolls his eyes, steeling his face as a cameraman enters the garage. He’s wearing a Red Bull shirt so Max doesn’t mind too much, but he can’t be captured looking as morose as he feels. The cameraman pans past him and onto you and the guest. Max watches you cringe as the guy throws up some hand sign to the camera, clearly at home with the media attention.

“Who even is that?” Max asks, unable to hide his rancour. He’s probably going to be forced to take a picture with Popeye later.

“I don’t know, some American football player?” GP says with a shrug, giving Max a helpless look. GP couldn’t give less of a shit about the celebrity guests touted around the gargae, and normally Max is his ally. “Are we done?”

Max nods, but not even a second later he’s looking again. It gets worse the more you talk, he can see this guy becoming more enchanted by the second. He wonders what kind of steroids they take in American sports leagues because the meathead is acting like a dog in heat. He leans towards you at an angle that is wholly unnecessary, his eyes fixated on your mouth, nodding too emphatically at everything you say.

“My God, why doesn’t he just lick her face,” Max says incredulously, more to himself than anything.

“Max,” GP sighs.

“Come on,” Max implores with a scoff, stopping himself from outright gesturing in your direction. “Look at him. That’s embarrassing,”

GP fixes Max with a deadpan expression. “Right, but you being sulky and jealous is the height of cool?”

“I’m not jealous.”

And he isn’t. Because Joe DiMaggio over there doesn’t have anything he wants. He’s not going to waste time being jealous of a guy getting half an hour with you when he has cats, and a home, and a life with you.

Finally, you look in his direction, but only because GP calls your name. “Can you come here?”

You give GP a thumbs up and excuse yourself, trotting over to Max without a second thought. Wannabe Tom Brady brazenly enjoys the view, and Max swears he hasn’t been that close to punching someone since Monza last year.

“What’s up?” You ask, slotting yourself between the two men as you lean back against the shelf.

GP hands you his phone. “Beat this Candy Crush level for me, would you? Been stuck for days,”

You look at him skeptically, but years of being filmed up close by cameras on the pit wall have given GP a hell of a poker face; he just stares back at you, and you give up with a huff.

“Men are hopeless,” you say with a roll of your eyes.

“Couldn’t agree more,” GP says, his eyes pointedly on Max, who can’t even defend himself.

Desperate to avoid GP’s scrutiny, he glances over at the gallery, only to find the Yank looking at him. Well, not him, you. He’s got that curious expression as he assesses you fiddling with GP’s phone, one that says he’s trying to understand if he has something to be worried about. He doesn’t. You’re not his to worry about.

“Here,” Max says, pulling off his cap. You barely look up at him before he puts his cap firmly on your head, holding it steady with one hand while pulling your ponytail through the hole at the back with the other.

The brim of the hat obscures half your face, and Max turns so that half your body is shielded by his, which he tells himself is in case a camera comes by.

“It’s sunny,” Max shrugs in his own defence, when he notices you looking at him with a raised eyebrow.

You adjust the cap on your head but don’t take it off. “Why don’t you just give me your letterman jacket?”

“My what?”

“Never mind,” you chuckle, shaking your head at him as you pat his chest with an indulgent smile.

He takes the opportunity at the sound of a large wheel gun to glance over at the gallery, only to meet the eyes of the guy you were talking to. Now that you’re no longer next to him, Max does sort of recognise him. He plays for some team named after an animal. Max just looks at him - he’ll do this all day if he has to - until the guy shoves his hands in his pockets and pulls out his phone, starting to tap away. Yeah, go back to Raya.

Good riddance, Max thinks to himself as he turns back to you, only to find that you already looking at him. He wonders for how long.

He can tell by your smirk that he’s been caught. If he’s honest with himself you caught him five years ago, this was just one of the few moments he let you know it. And you know it. How could you not know?

He thinks for a second that you’re going to tease him, but you don’t. You shift on your feet so that some of your weight rests against his arm, and go back to playing on GP’s phone.

“Go on, GP,” he says, fighting a smile at the large number 1 on the brim of what is now your hat.

He knows from the way GP is looking at him that he’ll get an earful about this later, but right now, he just clears his throat.

“Right, so,”

[yamujiburo]

if you don't mind, would you rank ash's outfits from worst to best? (also on the same topic, would you have wanted to see him in ethan, brendan, victor, and any other missed protag's outfits?)

Oooh this is a great question I've never really thought about

Shoutout to @/leafbladex_yt for this cool edit of all Ash's fits! (it's helping me judge the clothes alone rather than the art style). Ranking under the cut!

Going from least favorite to most favorite! AG, DP, SM, JN, XY, BW, OS

AG- I'm not a huge fan of this one. I feel like there's not a lot helping break the colors up in this design. The block of blue and the white "U" shape are competing to draw your eye and it feels unbalanced. I feel like if the "U" shape was on his chest or took up more space it'd help

DP- This outfit is pretty similar to AG's except Ash has a popped collar rather than a hood. However this one has two things going for it that I like. The "V" shape placement is nice and is what I wished the AG design had and also the black shirt is very unique compared to all of Ash's other designs that tend to be blue-leaning! Also like the extra pockets that make the pants feel less empty than the AG one

SM- Another unique look for Ash that I do like but isn't my favorite. It's simple and I do like the pants a lot actually but idk I just want a little more. The shoes make me laugh a bit. I like that they're going for a more slick look for the shoes but the little circles on em feel vaguely clown-like haha

JN- From here on I really like these designs! I like the JN shoes a lot and they honestly be my favorite shoes of the bunch. Not the hugest fan of the hat but I really like the vest and the white undershirt with red stripe. The balance and colors are really nice! My only gripe is the color of his shorts. It's not egregious but the purple that's only slightly different in value compared to the vest is weird to me. It works but idk I think a higher contrast might've been nice or just going for simple black shorts would've felt better to me (?)

XY- Don't have much to say about this one! It's just a solid, clean design. The hat is fun, the simple shirt with white trim and just enough lines to make the design look cool but not crowded is great! I also like the black undershirt. It's subtle but this design would look weird without it

BW- UGH this design scratches my brain just right. I looove the tall collar/hood, the 1/3 blue 2/3 white combo is soooo clean especially with the blue accents for the pockets. It's also nicely broken up by they yellow zipper and bold black "U" lines to separate the blue and white. So beautifully balanced

OS- This is a hard design to beat. It's just so iconic. Love the league symbol on the hat and the white panel in the front of that hat (forgot to mention I like that about the BW design too). The green gloves are great, I'm kinda sad they just defaulted to black in his other designs. The blue overshirt is great with the white collar/white sleeves. The yellow trim on the bottom, for the buttons and pockets give it just enough visual interest while keeping the design interesting. Keeping the overshirt open for the black tshirt is sooooo nice. It draws the eyes to the center and balances well with the light jeans. Love that it's tucked in also so the overshirt is noticeably longer creating even more variation. The belt is also a great touch! Love a belt. Belts are such a nice way to break up a design. The cuffed jeans are a look and I love that the shoes are designed but not over designed. The black and white combo with red accents is balanced super nicely. 10/10 no notes.

As for an outfit I'd wish we'd seen Ash in........ honestly Victor's. It would have been a huge deviation from what Ash usually wears, similarly to SM. Idk if it would have been my favorite look but it would be so wildly different to see Ash in long sleeves, actual skinny jeans and a beanie haha. Might have to draw this at some point

[teeth-draws]

Huehuehue

Click full size as always bls

Ohhh but he used to think nothing of it…

Torturing my fav RO again from @shepherds-of-haven

[saeun]

geto, above all, will do anything for his little girl. whether it's spending hundreds on a ridiculously large bouncy castle or a miniature designer bag. whichever fits her wants at best, she'll get it. but there's just one peculiar thing geto finds himself not being able to give her: the answer to her question.

with every ounce of his attention focused on the teriyaki chicken, he tries to quietly prepare a simple meal for dinner. right now, you're participating in your daily naps which lead to daddy-daughter alone time. a four-year-old girl keeps him company during the hard times without your presence.

if only geto knew how many questions a child can throw at him under a minute. he responded to most of her questions automatically, however, there was just one particular question that rendered him answer-less.

"daddy, why do you like mommy?" a harmless question. it doesn't reek of any deeper meaning nor was it meant to throw geto into a spiralling abyss. but why does he like you? when did he fall in love?

he wonders whether it was because you looked at him up and down as if he said the world's most offensive thing or maybe because you accidentally slapped him when he snuck up on you — actually, he vividly remembers and will continue to be embarrassed by that.

it all happened like this: you were waiting for the vending machine to deliver your snack. obviously, you were minding your business, but someone else wasn't. it took nothing but a left turn for geto suguru to stop in his tracks. as if mischievous music had been cued, geto smirks to himself. he has discovered his plan and his victim. no, he doesn't know you, nor do you know him. he's just very, very bored and needs entertainment.

geto sneaks his way to you. his posture was oddly cartoonish for his age: large, quiet tiptoe steps, hands brought up to his chest, eyes squinted for extra focus. according to the getology sugurist chronicles, one must imagine themselves as silence to achieve ultimate silence. real gangsters move in silence, they say.

"hey—" his sentence was unfortunately cut short. the sudden physical contact against his face left him breathless. he dares for whoever slapped him to not — oh!

is this what they call romance? "first love at sight" or whatever the hell satoru said? whatever it is, he's blushing. geto didn't expect such a beautiful, majestically shocked, and a tad bit disgusted lady to be bestowing him with her gaze. right now, as of this moment, he feels like saying, "haha, no girl has ever hit me before," but he won't. he has his own limits for cringing.

"sorry, i got startled," you apologized, reaching your hand out to soothe his cheek.

as if it's a default reaction, geto steps back. "don't worry, it's okay."

"please, let me treat it. it was my fault," you insisted.

"no, no. i'm okay, really."

sighing, you hand him the snack you ordered from the vending machine. "then take this."

and from there, the story of his love with you became history.

whirling himself out of the flashback, geto redirects his attention to his daughter. truly, he doesn't know what exactly made him love you. from the slight crush to marriage, geto's fell in love over and over. there's not just a single moment that hooked him to you. it was just you. not a moment, not a memory. just you. but of course, he isn't going to get sentimental with his little girl!

choosing to go with your first encounter, he answers her, "your mom slapped me and i immediately found her attractive."

"oh.." a confused look dawns the four-year-old. her head tilts to the side, eyebrows furrowed with lips twisted to the side. is daddy crazy? she can only wonder to herself.

geto's amused by her reaction. her confused look is replica to yours — kind of makes him miss you, if he's going to be honest. but as stated in the getology sugurist chronicles (2), one mustn't awaken the slumbering mother hen. he learnt from experience.

[cloudiewrites]

OMG. Hiiii. I love Tom Riddle and Theodore Nott. So I am totally going to ask you if you are comfortable to write either Professor Tom or a Professor Theo x fem reader fic with smut. Feel free to ignore this but I really struggle to find Professor Tom fics and Idk how to write them 😅

Professor Tom Riddle x f!reader

Warnings: strong language, toxic behaviour, manipulation, SMUT reader is a student in the beginning (still over 18!), reader becomes a little bit unhinged towards the middle (who wouldn't after meeting TR?) 18+MINORS DO NOT INTERACT

Author's Note: Wow, this took me ages to post! I was having a break from this blog due to my exams, but I promise I will be more active from now on. Also, this is actually my first smut! (Idk how to write them either, so I do hope you like it.) I tried to build some plot into it, so it is not just filthy p*rn, haha. Thank you so much for your request! <3

There are moments that change your life. Moments when you realise you will never be the same and your whole existence is divided into two parts - before this, and after this.

For you, this moment was meeting Tom Riddle.

The memories of that rainy day when your gazes crossed for the first time continue to haunt your thoughts almost every second of your existence. And no matter how hard you try to forget, they become more and more vivid. Sometimes you wonder if you are actually reliving it or if it is just a fruit of your imagination.

The rain was so cold that day, that your whole body was shivering under your soaking clothes. You were running across the courtyard, trying to get inside as soon as possible. Both of your hands were clutching your bag on top of your head, trying to prevent the water from getting into your eyes. You were almost at the door when your body collided with someone, and you lost your balance falling into a muddy puddle.

You looked up, ready to give a piece of your mind to whoever made you end up like this, but your words got stuck in your throat the moment your gaze crossed his.

Eyes as dark as the night. Skin as pale as the moonlight. Hair falling in elegant curls on top of the most beautiful face you have ever seen. He silently offered you his hand, before he took off his jacket and wrap it around your trembling figure.

"Are you alright?", he asked. His voice was smooth like honey, yet deep. You couldn't do anything else other than slowly nod before your cheeks turned a light shade of red. He offered you a small smirk, before guiding you inside the castle. No words were exchanged between you after that.

Looking back, you are sure that this was the moment that changed your life.

You didn't know who he was at first. He looked so young, that it was natural to assume he was your age. You have not seen him before, so he must be a transfer student, just like you were a year ago. "He did not wear a robe, so he must not been sorted yet", you said to your friends later that day and they just shook their heads. No one has heard of any transferring students this year, yet here you were claiming you have seen in the flesh the man of your dreams.

And you were almost convinced you were dreaming a few days later when you found yourself sitting in the back of the class, while he was neatly writing his name on the black board.

Professor Riddle.

"As your new Defence Against the Dark Arts teacher, I would like to establish a few ground rules right now", his voice was calm but dominant, "Always come prepared. I do not tolerate lazy students. No talking during class. No questions during lessons. If there is anything you do not understand, you can either conduct your own research in the library or visit one of my additional sessions every third Friday of the month."

Unlike you, the majority of the students have already heard of Tom and some even knew him personally, as he graduated just a few years ago. They carefully listened to all his rules, noting everything they should do to stay on his good side. No matter the house, the respect and fear felt towards Tom was felt by all students. You would lie if you said that this did not include you.

Yet in two weeks time during his first Friday session, you found yourself leaning over your notebook, while Tom was calmly explaining the lesson material to you. You were nodding your head, not paying even a little bit of attention to what he was saying. All you could focus on was the sound of his voice and the tingles that covered your whole body every time he lifted his eyes to your face, checking if were actually following.

"I am curious, miss, for the real purpose of your visit today", he said once you started packing your bag. You immediately froze in place, cold sweat forming on the back of your neck. Your trembling hands closed your bag before you turned to him with a tight-lipped smile.

"I am not sure I understand what you mean, professor."

He offered you a small smile, before grabbing his coat and briefcase and making his way towards you. Stopping just a step away from you, he lifted his hands toward your neck, making you gulp. You stood still, expecting him to wrap his hand around your throat, while his eyes burned into yours. His long fingers inched closer and closer to your skin, before wrapping around your tie and adjusting it so it could be centred.

"I am a patient and understanding man, miss", he said, his hand resting on the piece of cloth for a few more seconds, before moving away, "But I am no fool."

And you knew his words to be true. Because if there was a fool here, that was you. You knew it was wrong to pursue the foolish feelings that started to blossom in your chest. Despite the age difference being only a few years, falling for a professor was never a good idea. But how could you stop yourself when every time his eyes laid upon you there was a feeling of longing behind them? The small touches on your arms, every time he tried to explain to you the parts of the textbook you claimed "not to understand", the way his lips curved in a small smirk every time you volunteered to help during demonstrations in class, the way his gaze darkened that time he saw your friend's arms wrapped around your shoulders during dinner...

He may have thought he was subtle, but you knew there was some part of him that desired you as much as you did.

"What do you think of me, professor?", you asked one day, while sitting on the desk, arranging papers. As you were the only student who showed any interest in DADA sessions outside the scheduled classes, Tom moved the Friday meetings to his private office. They also started to happen every week, rather than once per month. And often, you were helping him with work, rather the other way around. "Why?", his gaze lifted from the papers he was grading, eyebrows furrowing in suspicion. He laid his pen down, crossing his arms in front of his chest and resting his body back on his chair. You sat next to him on a smaller wooden chair, but your hands did not stop arranging the graded exams, and neither did your focus move from them.

"I am...", you took a deep breath, thinking how to phrase your explanation, "Curious, I guess."

Tom watched you with interest, noting the way that your voice trembled in the beginning. Looking up at your face, his eyes trailed every single one of your features, before stopping at your lips.

"You are a good student", he finally said, his tone flat. Your shoulders immediately slumped and you let out a quiet "Oh.", your fingers now pressing the tower of papers on its sides to make sure it is stable. The silence between you grew longer as you tried your best to hide the disappointment you felt from his answer. Tom, on the other hand, was still staring at your face, trying to read your emotions based on your pursed lips and furrowed brows.

"All finished. I think it is better if I go", you finally said, unable to sit in his presence anymore. You stood up, ready to grab your bag from the floor, when cold fingers wrapped themselves around your wrist halting you in place. Tom stood up from his chair, moving behind you. Laying his free hand on the side of your waist, he leaned towards you, nose just a few inches from your hair. He took a deep breath, inhaling the sweet scent of your perfume, and let out a low groan.

"What I really think...", he murmured, the fingers on your waist digging into your flesh, "is not something I shall voice out loud. The thoughts that flood my mind every time I see you are too..."

Your breath hitched.

"Too?"

"Sinful", you felt his breath on the back of your ear and your body involuntarily shivered. Before you could think of an answer, his hands left your body and he took a step back. You turned around, eager to close the distance again, but were stopped by him grabbing your shoulder and gently pushing you away.

"Do not", he warned, "do not make this harder for both of us."

"But I-"

"I think it is best if you leave."

You gulped. And the first time your eyes did not cast down in shame - instead you held his gaze, your expression hardening.

"You cannot do this to me", your voice trembled, "Toying with my feelings , then pushing me away."

He raised his brow and his hand fell from your shoulder. You stood in place, not making any attempts to get closer.

"I did not do such thing", his voice sounded low and dark, his eyes suddenly turning colder, "In fact, I am telling you now... Whatever hope you hold in your heart about anything happening between us, you should kill it now."

"But you said-"

"I know what I said", he interrupted you impatiently, "And I mean it. But whatever affection I have towards you does not change the fact you are my student."

Your fingers wrapped around the edge of your skirt and you clenched your jaw, moving your gaze towards the door. The rational part of your brain was telling you to just grab your bag and dash through the door. The other part, the one led by your heart, was screaming at you to stay and confront him. It did not take you long to decide which one to listen to.

"Why does it matter?", you snapped, "I am an adult already. And you are only a few years older. It is not illegal or anything!"

Tom let out an annoyed sigh and pinched the bridge of his nose, before running his fingers through his dark curls. He turned around and walked around the desk, before slamming his hands on the hard surface.

"Merlin, you just do not understand!", his voice was full with irritation, "I can not lose my job. I can not lose everything I have worked for!"

"We can hide it", you protested, gluing yourself to his side and gripping his bicep, "Only for a few months! Only till I graduate!"

The man tore your hands away from his arm, cupping them in his palms instead. He tilted his head, searching your eyes, which were now starting to form tears of stress and frustration.

His face suddenly relaxed. The air between you felt lighter and a new spark of hope started to burn inside of you. His finger made its way to your cheek and wiped one of the tears that started to trail down your skin.

"Is it not curious, how weak love makes a man?", his finger trailed down to your jaw, before cupping it, "And no spell in this world is strong enough to save a man that has already fallen."

Your head instinctively leaned towards his hand and you closed your eyes, enjoying the feeling of warmth of his skin on yours. If you could only freeze time, you would stay in this moment forever.

"I don't want to be saved", you murmured and despite not being able to see him, you could feel the small smile that grazed his lips once you said it. You freed your hands from his and wrapped them around his torso, burying your head in his chest. It took a few seconds for him to embrace your body, resting his chin on the top of your head.

And if you could only see the satisfied smirk and cold gaze on Tom's face, you would have known how true his words are. There is no spell in this world that could save you not that you have already fallen...

------------------------------------------------------------------------------

You can't say exactly when the dream had turned into a nightmare.

Private sessions became everyday afternoon meetings, where you talked about different random topics. Tom never opened up about his past, even his Hogwarts years. On the other hand, he was a good listener and without you realising it, he managed to unravel your whole family history just within a week.

His silent nature did not bother you, however. You finally had someone who listened to you. You slowly started to detach from your friends, excusing your unnatural behaviour on all the extra academic work you were taking. They were worried, but every time they tried to voice their concerns, you rolled your eyes, before running to Tom to tell him about their words. "They are just jealous of you, my dear, " he would always chuckle, gently stroking your cheek, "because you found what they would keep searching for a long, long time."

Soon, he was the only person you really trusted. And he claimed he felt the same.

This is why he couldn't ask anyone else to sneak into the Headmaster's office and get the little leather diary in one of his desk drawers. This is also why you had to find a way to get the books he was interested in from the restricted section without getting caught. This is also why you had to lure the naive fifth-year Hufflepuff into the Chamber of Secrets and leave her there.

There was simply no one else whom he trusted to do these tasks. And you gladly completed each of his requests without question, doing everything in your power to keep him happy.

But soon this was not enough. And once you graduated all the promises he made to you broke into thousand little pieces, which were discarded into thin air.

"I don't need you anymore", his cold voice said, his eyes glued to the papers in front of him, "You can leave. Make sure you close the door."

Without sparing you even a glance, he grabbed the pile of papers and left for class, leaving you to gather your thoughts and pieces of your heart by yourself.

What did you do wrong? Why did he change so suddenly? Was it all a lie?

These questions continued to poison your mind for the next few years, while you tried to rebuild yourself. You did not realise how dependent you were on him, till you were left on your own. The weight of all the unsaid feelings within you was forcing you onto your knees, making you unable to get up and continue with your life.

And this is how two years after your graduation you found your way back to Hogwarts. The place where it all began...

------------------------------------------------------------------------------

The wooden clock on the wall was ticking dangerously close to midnight when Tom finally got to his office. The teacher's gathering has been prolonged unnecessarily due to Dumbledore's ramblings and him finding problems where there are none. The amount of control the young professor has exercised to endure this long meeting has left him completely drained of energy, but he knew he still had to do some research about the Founders' Relics. After so many years he was finally getting close to achieving his goal and he was ready to sacrifice as many nights of sleep as necessary.

He knew something was not right the moment he opened the door. The lights were still off and everything seemed to be in the exact place he left it... but there was just the faintest sound of someone breathing which made him immediately reach for his wand.

"Ah, look who finally came", your giggle reached his ears before he saw you turning on his chair, fingers moving towards the small lamp on his desk, "Terribly rude of you to make me wait this long."

Tom's lips pressed into a thin line and his grip around his wand tightened. He traced his eyes over the visible parts of your body, noting the little changes that had occurred since he last saw you.

Your hair, which was usually neatly combed and put in a bun, was now in a messy braid, the front pieces framing your face. Your lips, which usually curved in a shy smile, were now forming an arrogant, almost sinister smirk. Your eyes, which have always looked up to him full of admiration, were now staring down at him with a glint of insanity.

"Get out", he commanded, striding towards you with his wand pointed towards your head.

Your raised your eyebrows and your mouth shaped an "o" in a mock horror, before you reached for your own wand, pointing it back at him.

"Now that is not a way to welcome your ex-lover, is it?", your eyes squint.

Tom scoffed at your words, stopping at the edge of his desk, before his expression hardened.

"You were never my lover", he stated, his head tilting to the side, "And I thought I was extremely clear when I said last time I saw you that you are not welcome here."

You hummed, eyes moving to the ceiling. Still holding your wand towards him, you relaxed further into his chair, lifting your legs onto his desk. With a curious gaze, you followed the stone patterns of the walls around the room, while scrunching your face in disgust.

"3 years, Tom", you finally said, landing your attention back on him, "3 years you have been here and your office is as bland as it was when you first came here. It brings my mood down, you know? It's so grey!"

"You can leave then", Tom hissed through his teeth, making a few more steps till he stayed right in front of you. The tip of his wand rested under your chin and he pulled it upwards, making you look up, "I am giving you exactly a minute to leave, before I take your life."

A loud giggle left your lips and you pressed your neck further into his wand.

"How generous!"

"45 seconds."

You gently put your own wand back into your pocket, not moving your eyes from his. Tilting your head, your mouth formed a wide smile.

"Okay."

His brows shot in confusion, his jaw clenching. You could see his on the wand became tighter, his knuckles almost white.

"Okay?"

"Do it", you shrug your shoulders, "My ghost will be eager to see how are you going to explain why your new assistant went missing after coming to your office to drop a list of all the students that are going to be in your... our class this year."

Before you know it, his free hand flew to your face and gripped your face. His fingers dig into your jaw, lifting it dangerously close to his face.

"My assistant?", he let out a dry chuckle, "Good try, dear. And a terrible way to waste that minute I gave you."

With lips already starting to form the words of the deadliest spell, his fingers dug deeper into your face, before his eyes landed on the sparkling object in your palms. The unforgivable words quickly died in his throat and he withdrew his wand, stumbling back. Eyes full of anger met yours, who in contrast were sparkling with playfulness.

"How did you get that?", he demanded, reaching towards the object, but you pulled it back, before laying it on your head. Putting your elbows on his desk, you fluttered your eyelashes, smiling brightly.

"Do you think it suits me?"

"Stop playing around."

"You are such a bore", you rolled your eyes, "I went on a holiday to Albania. And I found this gorgeous, gorgeous diadem, which turned out to be Rowena Ravenclaw's. What are the chances?"

Tom seemed unamused by your story, instead twitching his jaw. His eyes stayed glued to the diadem on your head, the reflection of the sapphire on it sparkling in his cold eyes.

"How did you know where it was?", his gaze moved towards you, his hand putting his wand back in his coat. His tall form moved towards you again, this time taking a seat on the empty surface of the desk in front of you. With a smile, you took the diadem out of your head, twirling it between your fingers.

"You don't think you were the only one who managed to charm the famous Helena Ravenclaw, do you?", you raised your eyebrow, moving your tongue across your top lip, "You underestimate the power of women's empathy and love for gossip, Tom."

He let out an airy laugh, running a hand through his thick curls. After two years, he hasn't changed anything about his appearance. His face, his haircut, and even the suits he wore were the exact same ones he already wore when you were a student. You would lie if you said you didn't enjoy it - that meant that the Tom you loved was still somewhere inside of him. Your Tom.

"I'm impressed", he finally said, moving his hands towards his knee and locking his fingers around it. His face dropped into a serious expression once again, "Give it to me."

You tilted your head, pursing your lips. Your eyes moved to the diadem, before landing back on him.

"Oh, I can't do that, Tom", you rested your palm on your chest, looking up at him with doe eyes, "He would be very disappointed if I don't bring it back to him."

Tom took a deep breath, his upper lip twitching.

"He?", he pressed his tongue to the side of his cheek, "Who is "he"?"

You twirled in his chair, pressing the diadem closer to your chest.

"My Lord, of course", you let out a giggle, resting your cheek on your shoulder and closing your eyes. You still managed to see the way Tom's body tensed, however.

"He sent his regards to you", you smiled, standing up, "If you hadn't left me that day, he wouldn't have met me and subsequently learned all about making horcruxes."

The man's eyes immediately darkened and his hand flew towards your wrist, stilling you in place.

"Name."

"Huh?"

"Tell me his name", Tom hissed, his nostrils flaring. You stepped closer to him, noses almost brushing.

"And why would I do that?", you raised your brows, your voice turning into a mocking laugh, "Do you think I would betray him... for you?"

The sudden feeling of his arms wrapping around your waist and pulling you forward made you almost lose your balance and you grabbed his shoulder in reflex to keep you from falling on top of him. Nesting his head in the curve between your neck and shoulder, Tom pressed his lips next to your ear before muttering:

"You, my dear, are a liar", his teeth grazed the end of your earlobe, "And a very bad one."

Your whole body froze and you tried to push yourself away from him, but his arms were holding you firmly in place. Suddenly all the confidence you have displayed in his presence so far melted under the warmth of his touch, and you were left only with the hope you could still lie your way out of this situation.

"I am not lying", you protested with a quickening breath.

Tom lifted his head from your shoulder and rested his forehead on yours instead. His eyes stared deep into your own and his warm breath on your face made your whole body involuntarily tremble.

"I have already told you I am not a fool", one of his hands slid from your waist towards your arm and then hand, where you were still clutching the diadem. His fingers wrapped around it and pulled it out of your grasp with ease. Without looking at it, he placed it on the desk behind his back, before his hand found its way to the top of your head.

"I know you better than you know yourself, my dear", he muttered, his hand gently stroking your hair, "And I know there is no room in your heart for anyone but me. You would not be here otherwise."

He pulled back enough to be able to take a better look at your face. His gaze fell from your half-lidded eyes to your parted lips.

"You are mine. Always were, always will be."

A loud whine escaped your throat before it was swallowed by Tom's mouth on yours. His plump lips were chapped, a result of hours of his teeth sinking into them, trying to hold back all the snarky remarks he had for his fellow colleagues. The rough feeling made your knees buckle and you closed your eyes, relaxing fully in his arms.

Without breaking the kiss, he turned you around and with a swift move of his hand, pushed the diadem and a few books out of the way, before laying you on the cold surface. Your hands found their way into his hair, tugging the soft curls.

A low growl left his lips and he lifted his lips from yours, a trail of saliva connecting them, before it was broken by his fingers cupping your chin.

"This is what you wanted, is it not?", his voice was suddenly deeper and darker, "For me to take you on the same desk I once you graded you."

His words made a loud moan to escape you and your back arched up, seeking nothing more than to be close to him. With a low chuckle, he pressed his palm between your breasts, pushing you flat on the furniture beneath you. You opened your mouth to complain but were quickly silenced once he pushed his index and middle fingers in your mouth, almost making you choke. Fixating your gaze on his, you closed your lips around them and started to suck, making sure to flatten your tongue in the process.

The image before your eyes was something you had dreamt of countless times before - Tom, with his messy curls and parted lips, panting while the fingers of his free hand were skilfully unbuttoning his vest. You did not waste any time in helping him, focusing on shakingly unbuttoning his belt.

"So impatient", he clicked his tongue, withdrawing his fingers from your mouth, so could remove his shirt. Once his torso was in full view, you did not hesitate even a second before you lifted yourself in a sitting position and attached your lips to his neck. Nibbling and sucking the smooth skin, you started to nibble and suck your way down to his chest. His head fell back and he closed his eyes, his muscles relaxing under you.

Tom Riddle may not be a man who was capable of love, but he was a man after all. And it would be a lie to say he has never thought of you in a more... erotic way. You have always been so obedient and good, doing everything for him without any hesitation. He has always found that incredibly attractive, but not enough for him to act on his desires.

Now, however, the sight of you has ignited some primal urges within him that he never felt before. Maybe it was the few drinks he had consumed prior at the gathering or maybe it was the idea of the the crazy lengths you were willing to go in order to get back to him...

Tom Riddle would probably never know the reason for him giving up control for the first time in his life. To you, nonetheless.

His mind came back to reality when he felt you pushing him on his chair and nestling yourself between his legs. Looking up at him, you tugged his pants and boxers down, letting his erection free. You let your index finger gently caress the length of it, making it twitch. A small giggle left your lips before you repeated the gesture.

"Stop teasing me", the man groaned, and his palm rested behind your head in order to push you towards his member, but you swiftly moved to the side dodging it. You squinted your eyes, moving your hands to his thighs and digging your nails into them.

"You", the word was hissed through your teeth, "are in no position to order me around."

Tom scoffed and was about to argue when your mouth unexpectedly wrapped around the head of his penis, twirling your tongue around it. He let out a choked gasp and he tried to put his hand on your head again before you smacked it away. Swallowing his pride, he rested both of his arms on the side of his chair, bucking his hip forward.

Carefully watching his reaction you wrapped your hand around him, slowly moving it down and back up again, following the movement of your mouth. The feeling of him filling your mouth was causing some saliva to start dripping your chin, but rather than pulling away, you pushed him further into your mouth till your nose was buried in his dark pubic hair. The feeling of his swollen head hitting the back of your throat made you gag, causing Tom to groan in pleasure.

"Fuck this", he muttered, before grabbing you by your hair and pulling your head up, before pressing it down again. His hips buckled in harmony with your head, making sure you were taking all of him. His dick was now coated in your saliva, making it glisten in the dim light. You closed your eyes, the lack of oxygen making them sting. The rapid pace with which he was moving was making it hard for you to breathe through your nose and you tried giving him a warning slap on his leg, which he purposefully ignored. Instead, he moved his other hand towards your chin and held your head still, while he continued to thrust his hips up and down. Sloppy wet noises filled his office, being interrupted only by his heavy breathing.

Your thighs clenched together in a weak attempt to relieve the burning ache between your legs. The way he was using your mouth to satisfy himself was making your underwear damp, yet you knew better than to touch yourself yet. After so many sleepless nights during which you tried to relieve yourself, imagining how would it feel to taste him, you wanted to focus all your attention only on him.

Feeling he was close, Tom finally pulled your head back and examined your face. Both saliva and tears were smeared all over your chin and your cheeks were flushed in rosy colour.

"What a pretty sight you are, my dear", he smiles, wiping some of it with his thumb. You licked your lips, getting up on your feet.

"And you are such a smooth talker", your face leaner just inches from his, "I wonder if you are as good with the action as you are with words."

Taking this as a challenge, he stood up and pushed you back onto the desk, before lifting your skirt. His fingers hooked under the elastic bands of your panties and with one tug they snapped, leaving you completely exposed in front of him.

Tom gulped, burning the image of your waiting arousal into his mind. His fingers made their way towards your slit, gathering the wetness before easily sliding his middle finger in. You moaned at the contact, fluttering your eyes closed. He pumped his fingers a few times, his eyes carefully observing your facial expression before he slid it out. You whined at the loss of contact, opening your eyelids only to find him smirking down at you.

"Do you really think you deserve me wasting time on your pleasure?"

"Fuck you!", you snapped, resulting in him grabbing your neck and squeezing so hard, an airy cough left your lips.

"Such a dirty mouth", he lifted your face up, his jaw clenching, "but such a weak mind. Look at the pathetic mess you are..."

Your lips parted to offer a snarky response, but your mind quickly went blank the moment he slid fully into you. Arching your back, your hands found their way around his shoulders, while his rested on both sides of your head.

Tom did not waste any time in developing a quick pace, which made you roll your eyes back. With each thrust the head of his cock was brushing against your cervix, making your whole vision white. His left hand moved towards one of your breasts, pinching and twisting the oversensitive nipple between his fingers. His other hand made his way to your pussy, where his thumb started to draw sloppy circles over your clit.

Never in your life have you felt such pleasure in your life. Of course, you had previous lovers during the past two years while trying to get Tom out of your mind, but nothing compared to this. Curling your toes, you lifted both of your legs and rested them on his shoulder.

Both of you groaned in unison when you felt him going even deeper than before. His upper body collapsed on top of yours, his lips immediately latching onto your other nipple. Still gripping his shoulders, you dragged your nails down his back, leaving angry red marks behind.

The knot in your stomach started to tighten and your moans became louder and louder. Moving your hips so you can meet Tom's thrusts, you looked at his face, only to find him staring back with eyes clouded with desire. His fingers were now working faster on your sensitive bud and you let out a shaky breath: "Tom, I...", you could not finish your sentence, your vocabulary suddenly consisting only of his name.

"Shhh", he whispered, his hand moving from your breast to your cheek. He gently stroked it with his thumb and suddenly you saw in front of you the same Tom that charmed you years ago, "I've got you."

His words were enough to cause the knot to snap and your whole body went rigid, squeezing and pulsating around him. A few harsh trusts and Tom suddenly tensed on top of you, as he painted your insides white. You both held onto each other, fingers digging into soft flesh, as you melted into your shared euphoria.

It was not romantic.

It was primal. Rough. Dirty.

It was everything you have imagined.

Finally relaxing on top of you, Tom buried his head in your shoulder, trying his best to calm his breathing down. You laid under him, crushed under his weight, yet enjoying every second of the contact he allowed you to have.

Against your better judgment, you lifted your hand and started to gently stroke his hair. Against his better judgment, he allowed you to and closed his eyes in the process.

Tired from the long day and your office activity, Tom lifted you in his arms, his now soft member slipping out of you and he sat back on his chair, adjusting the backrest so you can both take a more comfortable position.

You lifted yourself from his chest and raised your eyebrow, but bit back your tongue the moment your gaze crossed his stern one, warning you not to voice whatever you had in your mind. Letting out a small chuckle, you shook your head and laid it back down on his skin.

There was an urge burning inside of you to mock him about showing gentleness, but deep down you knew this was your only chance to enjoy it. So you closed your eyes and relaxed, finally being able to fall asleep without the haunting dreams of what could've been.

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The sunlight was painting the whole room in a beautiful gold colour and Tom let out a low groan when he felt it hitting his face. His hand made its way over his eyes, shielding them from the light, while his mind slowly started to become aware of his surroundings. The uncomfortable chair was making all of his muscles ache and he immediately regretted not gathering the energy last night to make his way back to his room. The chill air coming from the window has not helped too, especially when we was only partly covered and-

Tom's eyes shot open looking down at his body and finding his suit jacket thrown over his waist and private parts. You, however, were not to be found. Not on top of him, not on the desk, nowhere in the room.

He immediately stood up, grabbing his pants from the floor and furiously putting them on, while breathing heavily. His gaze fell on the stack of books he pushed from his desk last night and he immediately fell on his knees, scanning the floor around him.

"No, no, no", he hissed under his breath, pushing his hair out of his eyes, "That little serpent!"

Not only you have left, but you also have taken the diadem with you. No matter how much he searched for it, it was definitely not here.

You tricked him.

Getting up back to his feet, Tom kicked one of the books on the floor, before slamming his hands on his desk. His breathing was hard and he could feel his blood boiling in his veins. Suddenly, his attention was caught by a small parchment of paper placed next to his quill. Unfolding it, he could have sworn his heart stopped for a second.

"My dear Tom,

Thank you for our wonderful night together. I did not want to leave you so early, but I had to be out of the castle before everyone else woke up. To be truthful with you, I am not going to be your new assistant. But your already knew that, so I guess it is not shocking news. I sneaked it yesterday when all of the teachers were having a party (or what you call a gathering, ha!). Neither do I have a new lord. You already knew that as well.

Do not stress about the diadem, as it is safe with me - if there is one thing I learned from you is that I need to take good care of horcruxes once they are made. I know it was probably foolish of me to bring it to you last night, as it does hold a part of my soul, but I promise that from now on I will take better care of it.

Without doubt your paths shall cross again. Remember Tom: You are mine. Always were, always will be.

Love, y/n

P.S. - I hope you do not mind that I helped myself by getting your keys from your jacket and getting a shower in your room. Also, I think you need to follow your own advice and start putting your objects away. I found your diary resting on your bedside table, so I had to take it with me. Do not worry - I promise I will keep it safe...

for now."

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CC artwork: Nasan Hardcastle

[xomakara]

Beyond The Bounty

(re-posting from my old account seulrinnie-rinrin/xomakara-secondary)

SUMMARY | When you get caught by Seonghwa, the bounty hunter, for the hefty bounty on your head, you can't help but want to know his story. PAIRING | Seonghwa/Reader GENRE | bountyhunter!Seonghwa, cowboy!Seonghwa, outlaw!Reader, off to the wild west we go, smut with no plot, uprotected sex (wrap it up everyone!), first time, fingering, vaginal sex, oral sex, praising, pet names RATING | Mature LENGTH | 7026 words AUTHOR’S NOTE | They fit the cowboy concept so well. Plus I watched too much westerns the past few days LOL. I actually couldn’t decide which member would suit this story so I let a name pick generator decide haha. And Seonghwa it is~

There was no point in struggling. No point in trying to escape when your hands and feet were tied by the harsh ropes. All you could see was the passing terrain of dirt and grass.

Your body was aching from the uncomfortable position you had been bound in. The bounty hunter that caught you didn't even give you a horse to ride, instead opting to lay you unto his saddle as he steered his horse.

"You know...You'd think that you treat a lady better than this." You muttered to your captor. He scoffed at your remark before starting up his horse again.

"You're not exactly a lady though." The man replied, smacking your ass hard enough to make you yelp out in pain. "What man would treat an outlaw like you as a lady?"

"Ouuu, tough words for the big bad bounty hunter." You scoffed. "Come on, you only caught me for my big bounty and left all these other bastards untouched. It doesn't really seem fair does it?"

"For a woman, you talk too much." The man chuckled.

He rode for hours without speaking another word. You tried getting him to say something else but failed every time. Your captor was a silent man. So you had nothing to do but look at the passing terrain of dirt, grass, the man's boots, and the horse's hooves. It seemed like the endless landscape never ended. It was almost maddening how monotonous it was. If it weren't for the horses hooves hitting against the earth constantly, you might have lost your mind.

After what felt like ages, the man finally stopped. He got off his horse and untied you.

"This ain't no prison." He explained while keeping his grip on the ropes. "But if you don't start being nice, I'll tie you back up until I find someplace we can settle down. What do you say?"

"Whatever you say." You shrugged.

"Good girl." The man said happily before letting go of the ropes and walking away. You watched him walk off into the distance before laying on the ground.

Oh, your back aches so badly. Being bound in the same position for such a long time hurts your muscles horribly. A few moments later, you heard the man come back and he squatted next to you. He lifted a flask of water and gave it to you. You took it from him and drank, glad that the damn water tasted good. When you finished drinking, you handed the empty flask back to him.

"It's getting dark and we're not going to make it to town at this rate. I'm setting camp up here." He started and gave you a look. "If you promise to behave, I'll leave you untied tonight. But if you try to run, I'm tying you back up. Do you understand?"

"Yeah yeah. I won't run." You rolled your eyes. You watched as the man prepared to set up camp. You laid back on the ground and let your mind wander.

"What's your story?" You asked suddenly.

The man looked at you with a frown. "What makes you ask?"

"You're just a lone man traveling around and collecting bounties. No family or friends to speak of. How did you end up doing this? And why are you alone?"

"I can ask you the same question." He asked you back, as he leaned against his saddle. "How did a woman like you become an outlaw?"

"Easy." You answered, rolling your eyes. "My seven brothers decided they wanted to be cowboys, so I went with them. We raided ranches and stole cows. We got chased by the sheriffs all the time and got shot at several times. I helped them hijack a train one day, escaping with a large amount of money and guns. And then we split up after finding out that we had a large amount of bounty on our heads. I was just in town stocking up on supplies when you caught me. And here we are."

"Interesting." He said simply. "So you're telling me that you used to live a normal life?"

"Normal?" You laughed. "Nothing about me is normal! It's probably a miracle that I survived growing up the way I did. I have seven brothers. Imagine the chaos!"

"Seven." The man nodded. "That must have been difficult."

"To put it mildly." You nodded. "If you ever get the chance, tell me your story."

"No thanks." The man shook his head. "I prefer living my life alone."

"What's your name anyway?" You asked suddenly.

"Why?" The man replied with a frown.

"Just curious." You shrugged. "I'd like to know the name of my handsome captor. I'm Y/N by the way."

"Seonghwa." The man told you.

You smiled slightly and nodded. "Nice to meet you Seonghwa."

Seonghwa didn't mutter anything and when you turned your head to look at him, you let out a soft gasp. You never got the chance to really look at what your captor looked like since you were hanging off the horse most of the time. But now that you weren't looking at the dirt, you were able to take in his full appearance.

Holy shit, he was beautiful. From his black hair to his brown eyes, there wasn't a part of his face that you didn't like. His arms were also well toned. Every muscle was defined and showed signs of the many adventures he had lived through. Not to mention his chest was pretty impressive too. Even with the jacket covering it, you could still make out a decent sized pec.

'Damn it.' You cursed yourself silently. 'Now I feel guilty for getting captured by him.'

You quickly shifted your gaze back towards the horizon. You couldn't afford to think about him right now. You had to stay strong. Your past experiences with men made it impossible to trust anyone except for yourself. Even if he treated you well, you couldn't get attached to him because you were bound to be killed eventually.

You did have a hefty bounty on your head.

Sighing, you continued to watch the horizon as you waited for the sun to set. "I've never met a handsome bounty hunter before." You sighed, unable to hold back your thoughts anymore.

"What makes you say that?" Seonghwa inquired.

"You're good-looking, ruggedly handsome, in fact. Most bounty hunters I've seen aren't exactly the best looking." You told him honestly. "You got a wife and kids back home?"

"No." Seonghwa shook his head. "I've been traveling since I was young. Sometimes for months at a time. Other times, for weeks. No attachments."

"Hmm..." You pondered over the situation.

"And you?" He looked at you as you slowly sat up. "Anyone waiting for you?"

"Well..." You trailed off. "I did once upon a time. Before I became an outlaw. But he was gunned down before we could consummate the marriage."

"Damn." Seonghwa cursed. "How awful."

"Yeah, it sucked." You frowned. "I warned him what would happen if he were to stay in my life. And he chose to stay anyway. It wasn't even an hour after we were wed that he got shot in front of me. He was so young. Only eighteen. That bastard never should have gotten himself into such a dangerous line of work."

"Did you avenge him?" Seonghwa inquired curiously.

"Yes." You said simply. "After he died, I joined my brothers. I shot the bastard in the head once I found him. I went straight from being a naive girl of sixteen to a widow in a matter of hours."

"Do you miss him?" Seonghwa asked softly.

"Sometimes." You whispered. "It's been nearly ten years so I can't remember how he looks now. But sometimes I do. It gets hard living my life alone knowing that he's dead."

"You said that you came from a large family." Seonghwa remarked. "Are you sure that you're alright without someone by your side?"

"Of course." You scoffed. "A simple trip across the country isn't going to kill me. Plus, I have a handsome bounty hunter here to keep me company. It's definitely a win-win situation."

"Ha ha." Seonghwa snorted. "Keep joking like that and you'll regret it."

"Really?" You giggled. "Handsome bounty hunter says that I'll regret joking with him. Should I believe you?"

"Absolutely not." Seonghwa told you sternly. "I'm not like those other men. I may be a bounty hunter, but that doesn't mean that I'll touch women without consent."

"Such a gentleman. I like you already. Sad that you're turning me in though." You said before giving him a sweet smile. "Just kidding. Seriously though, don't turn me in. Let's be friends."

"Friends?" Seonghwa raised an eyebrow. "No way in hell."

You let out a sigh as you resumed watching the dirt and grass below you. Hands and feet tied again, you thought you would be sitting upright on the saddle in front of him but he decided to lay you down instead. You could feel his warm hands near your back, holding the reins to keep the horse steady. He didn't say anything. There was no conversation. In fact, you couldn't hear any sound at all. Nothing but the sound of the wind blowing and the horse hooves hitting against the land.

"Back to looking at dirt and grass." You huffed. "Wonderful."

"There are other things to look at besides the dirt." Seonghwa pointed out.

"Like what? Cacti? Rocks?" You suggested sarcastically.

"Sounds about right." Seonghwa agreed. "Tell me something."

"Anything." You answered, trying to glance at him but to no avail.

"Have you always been this bold? Most women I've met don't exactly act like you." Seonghwa said with a slight hint of surprise.

"And how do they act?"

"Most are demure and coy. They don't talk much and prefer to remain quiet. They're happy to stay within their own circle and keep themselves safe." Seonghwa informed you. "They want security and nothing more. They want a nice home, some children, and the rest of their lives will follow suit. You, on the other hand, aren't afraid to challenge yourself and take risks. I mean what woman becomes an outlaw?"

"Me." You admitted. "This woman. So yes, you're correct. I am very different from other women. My parents were both strong people. They raised me differently than others. And when my parents died and I went with my brothers, they taught me to be tough. I've had to fend for myself since I was little. There was never a moment where I felt safe. Even after my husband died, I knew I had to go out on my own. If I wanted to survive, I needed to learn to fight. After joining my brothers, I learned how to shoot, rob trains, and kill. I have to admit, however, I never liked the killing part. But what choice did I have? All I cared about was keeping myself alive."

"I never said I disliked it. I respect your strength. It's admirable." Seonghwa said sincerely.

"Thank you." You smiled, staring at the man who stared at the land with equal intensity. "But let me ask you something."

"Go ahead." Seonghwa said simply.

"Why the sudden interest in knowing about me?" You asked. "You're going to turn me in anyway. What difference does it make whether or not you know my backstory?"

"True enough." Seonghwa conceded. "But I find it interesting."

"Okay. I guess curiosity killed the cat. Ask away." You rolled your eyes. "But first, can I ride sitting up? Laying like this is awkward and it hurts."

"Sure." Seonghwa said. He grabbed the reins and pulled gently to make sure the horse stopped. When the animal compiled, he released his grip, untied the ties that bound your feet and positioned you onto the horse seat. You were grateful to finally be able to sit properly and look around.

As soon as you sat up, you immediately took in every detail of the man that sat behind you.

He wasn’t as tall as your brothers Yunho and MIngi but still tall nonetheless. His broad shoulders barely fit into the leather jacket he wore. Black pants and boots completed his attire. However, his favorite piece of clothing seemed to be the black shirt that he wore underneath his jacket. It was open just enough to show a glimpse of his chiseled chest. It was slightly unbuttoned and made him seem even more desirable.

"Stop staring or you'll go back to looking at the ground." Seonghwa chastised you with a glare.

"Okay. Fine, no staring." You sighed in defeat. "Ask your questions. Or whatever it is that you want to know."

"Your siblings." Seonghwa began. "Who are they?"

"Don't you know the Ateez gang?" You asked curiously.

Seonghwa stared down at you. "Those are your brothers? The seven men with five thousand dollar bounties each on their head? You rode with them?"

"Is it that surprising? I'm surprised my oldest brother Hongjoong doesn't have a bigger bounty..." You paused for a moment before continuing. "If you're wondering, yes I am the youngest."

"I wouldn't have guessed that you were the youngest." Seonghwa commented. "It must be tough having to live up to everyone else."

"It's not that bad. We're actually quite close." You shrugged. "Everyone else has big personalities and we all get along really well. They all became my brothers when my parent's adopted them. I will always be their sister and they will always be my brothers even if we don't share a single drop of blood."

"You must care for them very much. To risk everything for them." Seonghwa said in understanding. "Have you fallen in love again after your husband died?"

"Again? I don't understand what you mean." You replied innocently.

"You fell in love with a man and married him. Have you fallen in love with another man since then?" Seonghwa pressed.

"Uh... What? I never said that I was in love with my husband. But I did respect him. He was a good friend and would have been a good husband." You explained. You turned to look at him. "Seriously. It’s not fair that I’m the only one talking. Tell me about you."

"I...I had a wife and child." Seonghwa said sadly. "She died from childbirth and my son died too from illness. He was only a few months old."

"Oh...I'm sorry." You muttered. Your heart broke a little bit at the sad news. You really hoped that the man beside you wasn't going to turn you in. Because right now, he reminded you a lot of her. Of your past self. "Are you alright?"

"I'm fine." Seonghwa reassured you. "It's been about five years now since she died. Sometimes it still feels fresh. But I've gotten used to it. Since then, I haven't found anyone else to settle down with. Not because I don't want to. But because it's not possible. I just can't bring myself to trust another person."

"Trust is hard to earn." You murmured. "So I understand why you can't do it. But perhaps you should try? Just one more time?"

"One more time?" Seonghwa repeated incredulously. "What makes you think that I would fall in love again?"

"Well...first of all, you are not alone." You argued. "Second, most of the world is lonely. They may have many friends, but they don't have a companion that they can share everything with. That special someone that is there for them when times are good and also for them when times are bad. Someone that they can depend on to be there through thick and thin."

"Someone like you?" Seonghwa questioned, looking at you curiously.

"Calm down, big boy." You laughed. "I'm not telling you to marry me. I'm just saying that maybe you shouldn't shut off your chances at finding happiness because you're afraid of getting hurt."

"Wise words coming from an outlaw." Seonghwa muttered with amusement. "Alright. Let's give it a shot. One more time."

"Another question for you." You said casually. "Of all outlaws to catch, why me? There were a ton in the town I was in. I don't even resemble my wanted picture. So why me?"

"I don't know the exact reason...but I think it's because you are so unlike any other woman I've ever met." Seonghwa answered honestly. "I know I said that you're different. But it's true. You're not like any of the traditional women out there. You're not a saloon girl and you're not a prostitute. When I saw you standing there next to your horse, I just had this feeling come over me. Like I could tell that you're more than meets the eye."

"You like the mysterious type, huh?" You teased.

"I like it when a woman stands out from the crowd." Seonghwa told you honestly. "I like it when they dare to defy society. I find it very attractive. My wife was like that."

"That sounds wonderful." You breathed out.

Seonghwa watched you intently. Your hair flew freely behind you. For some reason, he couldn't stop staring at you. You stared back at him curiously. Something about him intrigued you. From the way he spoke, to the way he looked. Maybe it was the aura he emitted that intrigued you. Whatever it was, you couldn't deny the fact that you were drawn to him. It didn't matter if you got arrested, turned in, or got a bullet to the face, you had to admit that he was handsome. And charming. He was just...so unlike any other man you've ever known.

In a good way.

After a while, Seonghwa cleared his throat. You instantly snapped out of your thoughts and forced yourself to focus.

"How long until we reach town?" You asked curiously.

"Not long." Seonghwa confirmed. "We'll stop at the nearest inn for dinner and drinks. Then it will take us another day to reach our destination."

"I guess I should get comfortable, huh?" You sighed as you adjusted yourself on the saddle. You looked up at him with pleading eyes. "Since I'm going with you peacefully, can you untie my hands too? Please?"

"You promise not to run?" Seonghwa asked curiously.

"I swear." You nodded.

"Alright." Seonghwa sighed. He removed the rope binding your hands together and loosened the knots on the other side of your wrists. "There."

You rubbed your wrists appreciatively. Now that you weren't tied up, it gave you the freedom to stretch your arms out. In response, Seonghwa wrapped his arm around your waist. You looked up at him with wide eyes but he seemed to just stare off into the distance.

You looked down at his hand resting against your hip. He hadn't removed it yet. Instead, he held it firmly as if he intended to keep it there forever. Without thinking, you leaned into his touch and placed your head on his shoulder.

For the rest of the journey, neither of you moved. You didn't speak. You didn't say anything either.

Both of you just stayed silent, savoring each other's company.

You reached the inn that was in the middle of nowhere. If you looked at the map carefully, it wasn't even a real city. However, it served as the last outpost for food supplies and travellers before they arrived at the main city.

You and Seonghwa walked up to the counter where a grizzled old man stood, watching you both. "Lookin' for a room?" He grunted gruffly.

"Yeah." Seonghwa said confidently. "Do you have any vacancies?"

The old man glanced over at you before answering. "I only got a small room meant for one traveler and not two. Does your pretty wife mind the small space? I reckon she'd prefer the comforts of a larger room."

Seonghwa didn't even correct the man as he looked down at you. "You don't mind the small room, do you sweetheart?" He asked softly.

You shook your head. "We'll take it. After all, it's only for one night."

The old man led you inside the small room. You pulled back the curtain and took a look around. It wasn't too bad, but it definitely wasn't a large luxurious room. There was a bed, which was only big enough for one person, a dresser and a table with chairs. It seemed to be more of a bachelor room rather than a couple's. But hey, at least you wouldn't have to sleep on the floor tonight.

"This room is the cheapest we have." The old man announced as he pointed to the bed. "But I suggest you make yourselves comfortable. Dinner will be ready soon."

He left without waiting for your answer. Once he closed the door behind himself, you turned to look at Seonghwa.

"Wife? Sweetheart?" You asked in confusion. "Am I missing something here?"

Seonghwa sat in one of the chairs as he gestured for you to take the bed. "It's a good excuse for a man and woman that’s together to be in these parts. To most folks, a female outlaw is unheard of. But a man and woman travelling together under such circumstances?"

"I guess...yeah. Makes sense." You mumbled.

"Take the bed." He muttered. "I'll sleep in the chair."

"Why not let me share the bed with you?" You suggested.

"You trying to seduce me?"

"Do you want to be seduced?" You countered playfully.

Seonghwa looked away guiltily. "No, I..."

You placed a finger on his lips, silencing him. "Don't worry about it. I won't seduce you."

"Go to sleep, Y/N." Seonghwa urged gently.

Reluctantly, you climbed onto the bed. Your skin prickled as you stared at Seonghwa who was already sitting in the chair.

You waited until he finally laid down on the chair before you finally relaxed. It was a short wait. Within minutes, you were fast asleep.

This time he didn't tie you up and lay you down on the saddle. This time, he actually put you on his lap as he steered the horse with one hand. As you sat comfortably in his lap, his free arm went around your waist.

You stared out at the beautiful scenery around you. It was truly amazing how vast the plains were and how beautiful the sunset was.

"Beautiful, isn't it?" Seonghwa whispered. His breath tickled the back of your neck as he spoke.

Your heart fluttered at the feel of his voice against your ear. You lifted your head to look at him. "Yes. It's beautiful." You breathed out.

"Right now, you don't look like an outlaw. Don't act like one. Be yourself." Seonghwa encouraged. "Enjoy the ride and the view. Just be happy. It's alright if you want to enjoy being in my arms. I'm not going to tell anyone."

His voice made your heart beat faster. You couldn't help but lean into his chest. "Thank you, Seonghwa." You breathed out.

"Y/N. Can I ask you a question?" Seonghwa asked curiously.

You turned to look at him curiously. "Sure."

"I know we just met but...can I kiss you?" Seonghwa breathed out nervously.

"Why the sudden interest in me now?" You questioned jokingly.

"Because I want to." Seonghwa admitted. "I never thought I would meet someone like you. Someone that doesn't follow the rules. Who dares to break away from what others expect her to do. A smart woman with such high morals. And she's honest and has strong principles. I always knew that I wanted to be around someone like you."

You opened your mouth to say something, but all that came out was a strangled sound. At first, you didn't know what to say, but then he pressed his soft lips against yours. Your body reacted involuntarily, giving in to his gentle kisses.

His warm lips felt good against yours. 

It felt right. 

Everything felt right.

When he pulled away, he didn't look disappointed. In fact, he looked completely content. As if he hadn't been looking for you, but found you anyway. That realization filled you with hope. It may have only been the second day since you met him, but you could tell that there was something special between the two of you. You didn't know if it would go anywhere in the future, but you were glad that you met him nonetheless.

You didn't know what this feeling was. Surely it couldn't have been love. This was your second day of knowing each other after all. Love was impossible. So you couldn't possibly be in love with him. Right?

Still, you couldn't help but smile. Maybe this would turn into something great after all.

As you rode into the main city, you gazed out at the streets, amazed by the hustle and bustle around you.

People were everywhere, running around and buying and selling their wares. Despite the bustle, you couldn't help but think that everything looked calm and peaceful. It almost seemed unreal.

But despite the chaos and turmoil, people still smiled and laughed. Even amidst all the commotion, they managed to make jokes and laugh. You found that incredibly reassuring.

"You're turning me in?" You asked, his chest warm against your back.

"Do you want me to? Or do you want to stay with me?" Seonghwa replied softly.

"Do you want me to stay with you?" You asked him, as his horse trotted along the streets.

"Would you be unhappy staying here?" Seonghwa asked with uncertainty.

"I'd be locked in a cell for the rest of my life. Why do you ask?" You questioned.

Seonghwa sighed. "Because for some odd damn reason, I don't want to turn you in."

Your brows furrowed. "Why?"

"I dunno." Seonghwa shrugged. "It's probably because I'm a soft-hearted bastard on the inside. Maybe I want you to partner up with me to hunt outlaws instead. Heard you're pretty good with a gun."

"You tryna make me one of the good ones?" You teased.

Seonghwa smirked. "Only if you wanna."

"If it means that I won't get hunted down..." You glanced over at him and grinned. "I might take you up on that offer. Thanks."

"Good girl." Seonghwa replied happily as he pulled you closer to his chest. "Let's go rest up in our rooms and decide our plan of action tomorrow morning."

You and Seonghwa decided on one room again but this time the bed was much larger to accommodate a couple. You both took a bath and washed your clothes before settling in to sleep.

As you lied in bed, listening to Seonghwa breathe, you couldn't help but think of your future. For the past few years, all you did was spend money and travel the west with your brothers. You grew tired of doing that. Of taking people's possessions and running away. It was boring. Sure, there was the occasional excitement and danger but you always escaped alive. What else could you possibly gain from living like that? All you had to show for your adventures were scars and bruises.

Now you have the chance to live your life differently. This might be your last chance to do so. Now that you had met Seonghwa, things weren't exactly the same anymore. The path ahead of you was still uncertain, but the unknown was always exciting. What would happen next?

You heard Seonghwa move in his sleep beside you. Then, a few moments later, you felt his fingers lightly tracing your cheek. You smiled, enjoying the warmth radiating from his touch. "Seonghwa?"

"Hmm?" Seonghwa replied sleepily. "What's wrong?"

"Nothing." You told him honestly. "Just thinking."

"What are you thinking about?" Seonghwa whispered suddenly.

"About us." You confessed.

Seonghwa's eyes snapped open and he quickly rolled over to face you. He cupped your cheeks with his hands. "What about us?"

"Us as partners." You stated simply. "And lovers."

His thumb brushed against your bottom lip. "Are you sure?"

"Very." You assured him as you leaned forward and kissed him tenderly.

"Have you ever been with a man since your husband passed?" Seonghwa asked as his lips trailed down your neck.

"No. Not once." You replied quietly. “Still a virgin, here.”

"Then I promise that you'll find no better lover than me." Seonghwa whispered against your lips. "Let's leave the past behind us and start anew. We'll see where this takes us."

Slowly, you drew back and nodded. "Alright." You murmured.

Seonghwa leaned in and kissed you passionately. "Do you want to keep going?"

You sighed in pleasure as he nipped at your bottom lip. "Can't stop now. I need to taste every inch of you."

With that, he continued down your neck, kissing you lovingly as his fingers slowly explored your curves. Soon, he was stroking your breasts through your shirt and teasing your nipples with his thumbs.

When his lips returned to your lips, you parted them eagerly, your own tongue reaching out to taste his. Soon, the passion between the two of you increased, intensifying with every passing moment. When he started kissing your neck, moving lower and lower down your chest, you held onto his shoulders.

"You're so soft, baby." Seonghwa breathed out huskily. "Soft as silk and sweet as honey."

"Mmm..." You moaned.

"So sensitive." Seonghwa breathed out as he traced his tongue across your nipple. "I could lick you all night long."

You whimpered as he circled your breast with his tongue, teasing you with the tips. "Seonghwa..."

"You've never been touched like this before, have you?" He questioned in a hoarse whisper. "Touched like this and felt loved."

"Yes." You whispered as you reached out to touch him.

"Have you ever tasted a man's flesh before?" Seonghwa asked curiously.

"Uh..." You shook your head. "No. Despite my flirtatious and bold nature, you'd be the first man I've ever given myself to."

"That's quite a confession." Seonghwa chuckled. "I think it's time that I changed that."

You gasped as he bit gently on your breast, making you arch off the bed in ecstasy. "S-Seonghwa!"

"I love it when you say my name like that. You know that, right?" He whispered against your skin. "I could listen to you say my name forever."

He began to suckle on your breast while tracing his fingers down your stomach. "God, I wish you were naked." He mumbled. "Wish I could touch you. Feel every inch of your soft, silky skin."

Before you knew it, he had undone the buttons of your shirt, revealing your chest. With shaking hands, he removed it and tossed it aside. "Look at how perfect you are." He breathed out. "So fucking sexy."

"Like what you see?" You asked breathlessly.

"Every damn thing." Seonghwa groaned as he caressed your naked skin. His fingers traced down your abdomen, trailing lightly over your stomach, stopping at your hip bones. He tugged at your pants and undergarments until they fell to the floor. "Fuck, you're gorgeous. So sexy and beautiful."

He lowered his head and ran his tongue along your belly button. You sighed in pleasure as he ran his nose up your abdomen, inhaling deeply. Suddenly, he pushed himself up and sat back on his knees, gazing at you seductively. "I want to taste you so badly." He said darkly. "I want to savor every part of you."

Without warning, he reached out and grabbed your hips, pulling you towards him. Then, he lowered his mouth to yours and kissed you deeply. The sensations coursing through your body left you wanting more.

Slowly, he slid down your body, tasting you with his tongue as he went. One hand caressed your thighs while the other trailed lightly up your side. "Beautiful." He whispered. "So damn beautiful."

His lips trailed up your ribs, to your collarbone, to your chin. He nibbled at your jawline before kissing your lips softly. Slowly, he began to explore the insides of your mouth, sucking and licking at your lips. “How are you feeling, my sweet girl?” He whispered against your lips.

You smiled. “Amazing.” You breathed out.

Seonghwa grinned. “Let’s give your body even more pleasure.” He whispered huskily as he stood up and yanked off his shirt. His muscles rippled with every movement as he approached you. Then, he knelt down in front of you and pressed his lips against your thigh. You squirmed slightly at the contact.

“Oh!” You exclaimed softly. “Seonghwa!”

“Shhh.” He soothed as he rubbed his lips against your leg. “Just let yourself enjoy this.”

Slowly, he moved his way up your thigh, giving you goosebumps with every stroke. You couldn’t help but feel excited as he kissed your inner thigh, his fingers continuing to stroke you gently. “Seonghwa…” You whispered softly. “What are you doing?”

“Shh…” He repeated. “Trust me.”

A low moan escaped your lips as he slipped his finger into you, gently caressing your walls. “Ah…”

“Such a good girl.” Seonghwa murmured, smiling at you. “So eager and eager to please.”

His fingers played with your clit while he continued to kiss you tenderly. You could barely contain your excitement as his lips traveled higher and higher up your thigh. Then, he slid his tongue into your cleft and licked up and down your slit, his hands stroking you gently as he went. Your hips bucked up against his face as his fingers continued to work their magic on your g-spot.

Soon, he sucked your clit into his mouth, gently biting down on it. You moaned loudly as you began to tremble. Your legs tightened around his head, forcing his head deeper inside you. He didn’t seem to mind though as he continued to play with your clit.

“Seonghwa…” You moaned again as your entire body tensed up. You couldn’t hold back any longer as you came apart underneath him.

He continued to lick and suck at your pussy, making sure to drink in every drop of your orgasmic juices. He kissed your inner thigh several times before getting up and standing over you. “I want you to take off my pants.” He commanded as he kicked off his boots.

Slowly, you undid his pants and took them off, throwing them to the side. Once you finished removing his pants, you pulled off his underwear, his erection springing free. Your eyes widened as you gazed at his cock. It was already half hard and incredibly large.

"My sweet girl, can you take me in your mouth?" He asked with a wicked grin.

You nodded slowly. "I'm willing to try anything once."

His eyes darkened. "Do you really mean that?"

"Yes." You answered as you wrapped your hand around his shaft and gave him a gentle squeeze. "I'll do whatever you want."

He cupped your cheek with one hand and looked deep into your eyes. "You'll let me fuck your pretty little mouth?"

You nodded enthusiastically. "Of course."

"Oh, baby…" He breathed out, closing his eyes as he imagined the two of you together. You on your knees in front of him, holding his thick member in your hand as you prepare to slide it inside your warm, wet mouth. You looking up at him, your hair cascading down your back as you stare into his eyes, begging for him to fill your throat with his seed. "I bet you look amazing like that. Can you imagine it?"

"Mmm... Yes." You moaned as you felt him sliding his fingers through your hair. "I can definitely picture it."

He moaned in pleasure. "God, I want you." He growled.

He reached down and guided himself into your waiting mouth. As soon as the tip of his dick hit your lips, you closed your eyes and swallowed the head of his cock. He winced in pleasure as you started to move your head back and forth, taking more and more of him inside your mouth. He could hear you moaning in pleasure as you bobbed your head up and down. Soon, you started to take him further and further down your throat.

"You're taking it so well, my sweet girl." He breathed out, leaning forward to run his fingers through your hair. "Is it too much?"

You shook your head. "No." You breathed out. "Keep going."

He grinned. "Good girl." He moved his fingers from your hair to caress your cheeks. "I'll take it slow if you want."

You didn't answer him, instead simply nodding your head as you sucked harder on his cock. You could tell he was enjoying the sensation because his breathing became heavier and faster. "Baby, can you take more?" He whispered huskily. "Can you handle the whole length of my cock?"

"I'll take you as far as you want, Seonghwa." You replied breathlessly.

Suddenly, he thrust himself deeply into your throat, causing you to gag a little. He held onto your head and forced himself to keep going, knowing that if he stopped, you would struggle to breathe. "There we go." He breathed out. "I knew you could handle it."

With every inch of him that entered your mouth, you felt yourself growing hotter and hotter. You were starting to shake with desire as you leaned forward, trying to take more of him inside you. He didn't stop, pressing himself into your mouth and stroking your throat gently.

"Keep going, my sweet girl." He encouraged you. "Take all of me. Make me explode inside your mouth."

As you kept moving your head back and forth, sucking and slurping on his dick, he reached out and caressed your cheek. Your face flushed red as you looked up at him. "You look so fucking beautiful like this." He whispered. "Taking everything I have to give."

He watched you continue to suck and lick at his cock. His breathing was beginning to become irregular as he fought the urge to come. "Oh god... God, I need to fuck you now." He moaned. "I can't take this anymore."

With that, he turned around, pulling you with him. "Come here, my sweet girl." He commanded. "I want you on top."

Once he lay down on the bed, you straddled him, hesitating. "Seonghwa...you're so big. Will you fit?"

"You won't know unless you try." He encouraged you as he caressed your face. "Put me inside you. As much as I need you, tell me if it hurts and I'll stop."

You bit your lip nervously. "Alright." You said softly. "I'll try."

"Good girl..." He murmured as you slowly sank down on him. "Are you okay?"

"Yes." You gasped as you felt him filling you completely.

"It's not too painful?" He breathed out.

"Not at all." You answered honestly. "It feels amazing."

He smiled. "That's my sweet girl." He said as he caressed your breasts. "Feels so good to finally be inside you. To be buried deep inside you."

His words sent chills down your spine as you rode him, bouncing up and down. Every time you bounced, he gripped your hips tighter and held you in place, ensuring that you stayed impaled on his dick. With each thrust, you could feel him throbbing against your pussy walls. He could see how badly you wanted to come, how badly you needed to come. But you knew Seonghwa wouldn't come before you did.

"Tell me what you want." He whispered softly as he stroked your stomach. "Say the word and I will give it to you."

Your pussy clenched around his dick as you bit your lower lip. "Fuck me harder, Seonghwa." You breathed out. "Please."

"Such a naughty girl." He chuckled. "But I love it."

He grabbed your ass and started thrusting into you harder. "This is our first time having sex, you know?" He breathed out. "You're doing so well, my sweet girl. Don't worry about anything. Just ride me and let me give you pleasure."

You smiled as you pumped up and down on him, loving the feeling of his cock inside you. The room was filled with heavy breathing and low moans as the two of you tried desperately to reach your orgasms.

"I think I'm close." You breathed out.

"I think you are too." He agreed as he kissed your neck. "Just let go, sweetheart. Let go and come with me."

Then, you felt an intense wave of heat building within you. You trembled as you reached your peak and cried out loudly, squeezing Seonghwa's hips tightly. As your orgasm ripped through your body, he continued to fuck you even harder, wanting to make sure you came just as hard as he did.

"That's it, my sweet girl." He grunted. "Let it all out. Come all over my cock. Take everything I have to give."

As the two of you rode your orgasms out, you held onto Seonghwa's arms tightly. "Oh... oh god... I don't know if I can take anymore..." You panted out as your body relaxed.

"Hold on, my sweet girl." He replied as he ran his fingers up and down your arm. "We've still got some time left."

The next few minutes were filled with kisses and soft touches as both of you recovered from your climaxes. After a couple of minutes, you opened your eyes and gazed lovingly at him. "Wow... that was incredible." You said softly.

He smiled and brought his thumb to his mouth, tasting you. "Yes, it was." He replied. "And it gets better every time."

"Oh, really?" You asked with a smile.

"Really." He replied as he cupped your cheek. "If you're willing to be patient with me, I promise you that it will only get better and better. And someday, I will give you something you've never experienced before."

You shivered slightly. "Like what?"

"Hmm... I haven't decided yet." He admitted with a sheepish grin.

You let out a laugh, cuddling closer to his body. "Well, that doesn't exactly help me decide whether or not to be patient."

"Sorry, my sweet girl." He apologized as he brushed a strand of hair away from your face. "I'm trying to be romantic, but I'm very rusty at this sort of thing."

"You'd better get used to it." You replied with a wink. "Because I plan on being your partner for a long time."

[kumasakka]

.𖥔 ݁ ˖ ❝ 𝐔𝐍𝐈𝐓𝐄 𝐆𝐀𝐍𝐆𝐁𝐔𝐊 ! ❞

⋆.˚ 𝐏𝐀𝐈𝐑𝐈𝐍𝐆. johan seong x reader .

⋆.˚ 𝐒𝐔𝐌𝐌𝐀𝐑𝐘. what are you seeing right now? is johan bullying kids right now — oh never mind those kids were asking him to lend a hand.

⋆.˚ 𝐖𝐎𝐑𝐃𝐂𝐎𝐔𝐍𝐓. ~0.7k words .

⋆.˚ 𝐂𝐎𝐍𝐓𝐄𝐍𝐓. lowkey plantonic. f!readers. established relationship. lookism x questism crossover. safe for minors! crappy writing. johan may seem ooc. I have no plan what this is.

　“—I'M begging you, so please help us one more time! At this rate Gangbuk will fall into Choyun's hands!"

The boy who stood infront of Johan and shut his eyes tightly. But you completely misunderstood — in your eyes, you watched how Johan was bullying a kid who seemed to be around your age, maybe even younger. Or maybe Johan was giving them a lesson. But it still looked wrong from where you stood and you probably weren't the only one who thought wrong.

You didn't hesitate to take action, stomping towards their direction. And with that volume of your loud stomping, their heads turned to you. Two confused, one troubled. "[name]..." Johan muttered, taking some steps back as he sweatdropped. Your expression already said everything — you were giving him an earful for something he did. But he doesn't even know what he did wrong.

And he wouldn't dare to ask since that would result in your earful getting dragged into the length. So no, Johan will not ask what he do wrong even though he knows you couldn't stay mad at him for a long time. He will not take advantage of this fact. Okay sometimes he does, but only if he really needed it. "What are you doing here?" he asked, a sweat bullet formed on his cheek

"Mister, I need to ask you! What are you doing to these poor kids?!" you huffed, accusingly drilling you finger against his chest. Hard chest.

As soon as you turned your head to the other two, they flinched a bit, only relaxing after seeing your gaze soften. "Hey, you good? Did he bully you or was he being mean? Just tell me and don't worry about him." you said, worrying a little that they wouldn't tell you the truth for his sake. "Don't need to lie, I will beat him up for you. Really, I don't look that strong but I am."

"You misunderstood—"

"Lies." you glanced at your boyfriend next to you, your glare sealed his lips.

"I-It's alright, noona." the girl spoke up first — noona? Was it a he or she?

"Yes..! We were actually asking Johan hyung to help us!" the boy added.

Silence took over you four.

"Help you?" you raised an eyebrow. "He and help? With what."

"Erm... It's a long story." he sweatdropped.

"Long story short, we want to unite Gangbuk or else someone else will! And that someone else is the definition of evil." the girl, or boy? explained.

You blinked. "Oh..." you blinked again, closing your mouth before a laugh escaped your lips, "you're joking, right?" You shook your head with a small grin. But the silence proved otherwise. "Wow. Unite Gangbuk. Haha... Haven't heard those two words for a while. Erm, you weren't joking? You two are being serious?" you commented, just to get nods from them. "Sorry for interrupting..."

"Please help us one last time." the boy bowed down again. "I can't explain, but it'll be dangerous for everyone if I lose! I want to protect everyone dear to me!"

Your eyes went to your boyfriend next to you, your elbow nudging him. "Come one, help him. He seems to really need it." you whispered. "Even though I don't know them. They deserve it, don't they?" you smiled innocently as your eyes met and you knew he was still annoyed because you didn't believe him. It wasn't your fault anyway. It's not like it's his first time bullying — beating some people up.

"It doesn't matter what happens to me! However, I can't let the people around me get hurt!"

"...just this once?" your eyes lit up as Johan questioned this.

　　　　　　　　─ ⊹ ⊱ ☆ ⊰ ⊹ ─

"I'm sorry okay?" you apologized, trailing close behind Johan. "I'll believe you from now on, okay? I'm sorry!"

"Yeah sure..."

"Sorry, okay?! Johan!"

Haru and Suhyeon watched from afar as you two walked away after Johan agreed to lend them a hand for one last time. "He had a girlfriend?" Haru muttered under her breath, blinking several times. Well it was kind of hard to believe to be honest. "A pretty one at that." Suhyeon added with no shame, his eyes lowered and lowered — "ow! Hey, what was that for?!" he cried out, just to see how Haru was furrowing her eyebrows.

"Sorry!"

"Please refrain yourself from letting your eyes wander..."

"I couldn't help myself!" Suhyeon whined before turning to the lone figures again, "do you think she was strong?"

"Based on her looks no. But never judge a book by it's cover I guess." Haru answered and followed his gaze.

"I believe she could've helped us too to be honest..." he mumbled.

"Really?"

"Mhm."

After all, her stats were unmeasurable.

© 2024 kumasakka — do not plagiarize , copy , modify , translate our work !

a/n's note — ngl I have no idea what I just wrote. this is so random, I just wanted to read a little oneshot where yn appears in questism too alongside johan.

[gojo-mochi]

“C’mon baby show me that you care.”

CW: Shanks is your dad’s friend in this au. Modern!AU. Fem!Reader. Toxic!Shanks. Age gap (Reader is in first year of College 20s and Shanks is about 40s), Degradation, dubcon, spanking, fingering, P/V, toxic coercion, manipulation. Slight voyeurism. Sex on top of a car. Nicknames (Baby and sweetie)

A/N: I um don't know what to say. Haha - hi? *twirls hair* I was listening to Vampire by Olivia Rodrigo while I posted this hah

WC:4.3k

You first met Shanks at a family barbeque, he was an old friend of your dad but he didn’t really look that old to you. Sure he had some stubble going on but his hair showed no signs of graying or another like that. When your dad began to introduce you to him, you first noticed the scarring over his eye, he catches you staring and winks at you. “Careful, look too long and you might end up falling for me.” Your face turned as red as his hair at that moment, your dad didn’t seem to take it seriously as he laughed and smacked Shanks’s back, “Ah, still up to your old tricks huh, Shanks?” Shanks laughed back, finally saying hello to you properly. You wished that you paid more attention to your dad’s words at that time…

Months passed before you saw Shanks again, this time you found him with a woman wrapped around his arm, walking into the cafe you were already sitting at. You didn’t pay him much attention and focused back on your lecture notes, scribbling down notes after notes, lost in your studying when Shanks plonked down on the seat across from you. He gave you a wide grin and a wave of his hand, “Yo! Y/N, right? Long time no see!” You were a bit startled but pleasantly surprised that he remembered you. You tucked some hair behind your ear as you greeted him, “Ah that’s me. Your name was Shanks?” 

His eyes glinted as he leaned over closer to you, “Aw come on now, don’t tell me you forgot about little ol’ me that quickly?” He got really close to your personal space, placing a hand over your notebook even, making you focus solely on him. He stares at you for a couple of seconds, “Oh wow, you've gotten prettier since the last time I saw you? What’s your secret, hmm, baby?” That pet name he used went straight to your head, making you stutter as you try to think of what to say, Shanks chuckles, bringing his hand to softly pat your blushing cheeks. “Trade secret? I won’t tell if you don’t~” He winked, and his words were not lost on you, as he stood up to take the open seat directly next to you now.

Knocking your thighs together as he absentmindedly picks up your notebook and flips thru your notes. “Wow, smart and pretty, aren't cha?” He casually placed a hand on your thigh, his pinky faintly touching the hem of your skirt. “Hard to find girls like you nowadays…” He murmurs like he was talking to himself, you fidget under his touch, feeling hotness bubble up inside of you. “Um, Mister Shanks, can I have my notes back? I have an exam I need to study for.” He gasps dramatically, “Mister Shanks? I thought we were closer than that, baby.” He squeezes your thigh and lets go of it in the next second, placing your notebook back down, and getting up. You thought he was getting ready to leave but he took your phone from you and put his number in, throwing it back to you with a carefree smile, “If you ever need any help with your notes or anything else. Be sure to call me, ok, baby?” 

He finally leaves you after that, assumingly back to that woman he came in with but you didn’t bother to check as your heart and mind was reeling from that interaction with him. That night you stared at the number saved on your phone under the contact ‘Shanks <3’, you didn’t text him that night. You didn’t text him at all actually, chalking his actions up to it all being some sort of game to him. You were more focused on your studies at the moment, you couldn’t be roped up in some random older guy’s scheme. So more months pass, you did well in your studies and even found yourself a boyfriend! Forgetting all about Shanks during that time. 

Shanks did come over though, more often during this period, he and your dad started hanging out more so he was invited to some family dinners. He didn’t do much except for the occasional touches and multiple winks. He asks you about your studies and stuff you like at the dinner table. You try not to blush a lot when he talks to you, but he makes it hard from how he focuses his attention on you. Giving follow-up questions, remembering things you told him from the previous dinner, and even giving you small gifts from time to time. You were slowly warming up to his charms, falling for all his honeyed words and alluring touches. 

It was supposed to be another nice family dinner with Shanks again this week, something that you look forward to. But tonight as you walked into your home, you slammed the door behind you and walked straight to your room without a word. Your parents came to check up on you, knocking on your door and asking if everything was alright, but you shooed them off saying that everything was fine. But, everything was not fine, you just found out that your boyfriend had been cheating on you for months now, you just confronted him earlier that day and broke up, so all the pain and emotions were crashing down on you. 

You buried your head under your pillow as you wailed and cried your little heart out, you heard the door creak open but mumbled “Go away.” to whoever came in. They didn’t seem to listen though as you felt your bed dip and a soothing hand start to rub at your back. You angrily shot up to yell at them, “I told you to go away!”, tears blurring your vision you could still see that this was not your parents but Shanks who came in to soothe you. His hand is still on your back as you gape at him, “Easy there, sweetie.” You threw your pillow at him, smacking him right in the face, you felt a little bit bad seeing him just take the hit full on without even dodging or taking his hand away. 

He grabbed the pillow and placed it by your side, “Feel better?” his hand continued to rub circles on your shoulders, lessening the tension you first felt when he came in. His tone was so soft and sweet, that your walls were melting bit by bit and you threw yourself on to him this time. Clutching at his shirt, bawling your heart out, spilling tears and all the things your ex-boyfriend ever did to you. His shirt was getting wet but he didn’t seem to care, pulling you in closer to sit on his lap as he tucks his chin on your head and envelops his arms around you. His scent invaded your nose, a musky and spicy cologne that he always wore, it made your head spin a bit. 

His hand weaves through your hair, petting it gently as he cooed to you, listening quietly to your woes. As your voice gets more hoarse later on, falling to whimpers and burbles, he leans back, cupping your face in his hands. You shake your head, trying to cover your face from him seeing it. “Aw, come on now, baby. Let me see that pretty face of yours.” He slowly takes your hand into his, and tilt your chin up to face him. You knew you looked like a mess right now, you felt like a mess right now. But as soon as Shanks saw your face, he gave you a long smooch on your forehead, your nose, and your cheeks, lingering on each kiss a bit longer than the last. 

“There’s my girl, that guy doesn’t know what he lost.”  

His stubble tickles you a bit with each kiss he places on you, making you feel almost giddy on the inside. His words and action were stirring something inside of you, making you do something that you wish you could take back. You surge forward, planting your lips on his, even going as far to poke your tongue out at him. “Mmpf!” Shanks was shocked at this sudden intrusion, allowing you to slip your tongue in his mouth sloppily, tasting a strange mixture of mint and something bitter, remembering that he usually likes to sips wine at the table. He pushes you away once your hand goes to paw at his bulge. 

Hands gripping down on your shoulders as he stares at you, wide eyes, lips parted and a bit swollen and shiny with your lipgloss smeared all over it. You teared up again, blubbering out an apology as shame filled your gut. “I-I’m really sorry, oh my fucking god, what’s the hell wrong with me? I-” Shanks holds your tear stricken face in his hands and wipes away the oncoming tears, shushing you gently, “It’s alright, haha, I’m not mad that a cute girl like you decided to come on to me, to be honest. But, tell me, sweetie, is this something you really want?” His tone got deeper, laced with something that made your stomach churn.

Shanks leans in to kiss you on the lips again, tracing your bottom lips with his tongue tenderly. Pulling away and chuckling as you whine, hands clutching on his shirt, eyes begging for more. “Now, now, your parents are still worried, waiting in the kitchen, I don’t think you want them to come in here and find us like this, now would we?” His hands travel down your chest, squeezing at them for a bit, before unbuttoning your jeans, his fingers dancing on the edge of your panties. “Don’t worry though, baby, after all, I did promise your parents that I’d help you. But only if you can beg me for it, can you do that for me?” 

His fingers dip inside your panties, feeling the wetness that was already forming, his tone changed again when he asked, “Can you say ‘Please make me feel good, Shanks?’”  You hiccup the words he wanted out, feeling your mind start to get hazy from his actions already, his other hand leads your head down onto his shoulder. “Good girl, now try to be quiet for me, alright?” He didn’t spare another second after asking that, his fingers moving quickly inside of you, plunging in with such precision that you felt an orgasm building fast already. You bit down on his shoulder as the almost shocking orgasm washed over you, muffle your screams and moans. 

Shanks fingers left you, making you clench around nothing, feeling utterly empty, he laughs outright when you whine. His digits poking at your lips, as you obediently opened your mouth to lick them clean. After you were done, he pats your head and gives you one last kiss, “I have to go now, sweetie. Be a good girl and try not to worry your parents, yeah?” When you tug at his shirt and ask him to stay, his face changes into a disappointed one. “I thought I told you to be a good girl, yeah? You can handle the night without me, can’t you? You’re a big girl, sweetie.” He sighs out, making you drop his shirt and shrinks back into yourself with a soft “Sorry..” escaping your lips.

His mood instantly changes upon seeing you so docile, cupping your chin up and pressing a heated kiss on your lips, with a promise of, “Don’t worry, I’ll come back for you soon, sweetie. I’ll be sure to show you what a real man is.” And with that, he left, closing your bedroom door behind him. You try to strain your ears to catch the words he was saying to your parents but they were too far away for you to make any sense of it. You crawled back in your bed, too tired to clean up or change, opting to just throw away your jeans, rubbing your thighs together as the slick in between started to feel uncomfortable. Sleep that night came fast but it was not peaceful, you tossed and turned, your mind replaying your breakup with your ex and what happened with Shanks in your bedroom. You didn’t know what to feel about it or the words he said to you. 

Shanks disappeared for a couple of weeks after that incident, you asked your dad once when he was coming over for dinner again but your dad just shrugged saying that Shanks seemed to be busy. Bitterness bubbles up in your heart, Shanks was just like those other guys, he didn’t care about you. You pushed down any feelings of attachment or affection for him, that was until, one day after you were done with class and was walking home. A red mustang pulled up right beside you, the window rolled down and Shanks winked at you from the driver seat.  

You didn’t know if you wanted to cry from happiness or anger at this point, you chose anger seeing at how casually he greeted you like nothing happened. “The hell do you want?” You spat out, eyebrows furrowed in, tears pricking at the corner of your eyes. Shanks got out of the car and came to embrace you, strong arms trapping you in his hold. The tears came out as you smack and hit at his chest, venting out your frustrations at him. Your meager attacks barely did any damage to him apart from the sparse grunts. Once you exhausted your strength and your body limped on to Shanks, him rubbing those same damning circles on your back that always seem to calm you down. 

Your cries settled down to barely audible whimpers and Shanks usher you in his car. You slump down in the passenger seat and he buckles you in, getting in the driver seat soon after. You lean your head on the window, watching the scenery pass you by, silently cursing yourself for being so easy. You should be more mad at him, curse him out more, hit him more, but when Shanks’ hand comes to squeeze your thigh and he gives that charming smile, your heart shoves your rational mind out of the way. 

“Why did you leave?”

Shanks turns down the radio, glancing at you, “What was that, baby?” You dry swallowed, feeling your throat burn a bit, he’s still using that nickname on you. “You left, without a word. You left me alone, after what happened, I mean, I thought that…” You trail off, pressing your head against the window, feeling childish for voicing out your feelings to a man almost twice your age. Shanks let out a hum, his hand on your thigh started to trace small circles and a repeating pattern on it. It was almost hypnotic the way he does it, you immediately felt your body calming down from his touch alone. 

“Sorry, something came up for me, and I got super busy. I wanted to contact you, but I don’t have your number, remember? And it’s not like I can contact your dad and be like ‘Hey, can you tell your cute daughter who I fingered bang in your house that I’ll be busy for a couple of weeks?’” 

You swat at his shoulder, with no malice or anger this time, giggling as you do so. “Shanks!” He sticks out his tongue at you as a retort. “I really am sorry, baby. That’s why I’m taking you somewhere special tonight.” You sink back in your seat, fiddling with your hands a bit. “Where are we going?” Shanks turns to look at you for a second, winking, “Somewhere special, I promise you’ll love it.” That ‘somewhere special’ turned out to be on top of a hill, overlooking the city. Far away enough from the light pollution so that the night sky shone like diamonds above the two of you. 

Shanks took your hand and led you out of the car to view the sights, “Pretty, isn’t it?” His hand slid down to your back, you scoff and cross your arms, “If you’re gonna say ‘But it is not as pretty as you’ I’m gonna leave.” Shanks laugh heartily at that, squeezing your waist and pulling you in his side. “Is that what boys your age say?” You chewed on your lips for a bit, thinking of what to say. “Why does that matter to you?” You felt a little bit smug for only a couple of seconds as Shanks pinned your back to the front of his mustang. Easily lifting you up and pushing you back on the hood, forcing his knee to come right in the middle of your skirt. 

He nipped at your neck as his sultry voice murmured out, “Cause I believe that I promised that I would show you what a real man is, isn’t that right?” Your hands clawed at his back, as his knee started to nudge under your skirt, rubbing a wet spot on your panties. “Wait-here? What if someone sees us?” Your nails dig in a bit as he replaces his knee with his hand instead, sucking in a heavy breath at feeling how drench you already gotten. “No one comes up here besides me and I think you like the idea of getting caught, don’t you? Daddy’s precious little girl is a needy slut, isn’t she?”

You liked to think that you were better than this, to let some older man degrade you and fuck you out in the open. Haven’t you learned your lesson from your last ex and hearing all those stories fuck boys and frat boys around campus. Shanks exude the same kind of energy those guys have, confident, arrogant, charming, all wrapped in a hot package with red hair and clean stubble. Speaking of ‘packages’ you wonder if Shanks can back all his talk, as Shanks’ hand expertly began to plunge in and you of you in a swift pace. Your thighs shakes and tense up, as your moans and whimpers fill the night air.

Shanks bit down on your neck hard enough to leave a painful mark on it, you hiss in pain, clawing even deeper on his back. The sudden pain with his increasing pace made you reach your peak hard, legs spasming out, ankles locking in behind his back. His hands roughly pull up your skirt and rip open your blouse, a few buttons breaking off in the action. Tugging down your bra and latching a mouth on your nub. Biting at one and tweaking the other one with his hand, it was painful to say the least, you tried to tell Shanks just as much but he just replied with; “Hah? You can take it, can’t you? You’re a big girl. Smart, pretty, more mature than the other sluts at your campus, right?” 

He wasted no time, sliding your panties to the side, you didn’t even realize that he got his cock out and was already slapping it against your sensitive bud. You flinch and try to crawl away, pushing yourself further back on the hood of the car, but Shanks shakes his head and makes a disappointed noise at you. “You’re really going to do this now? Tch, looks like I was wrong about you after all.” He didn’t make a move to pull you back in, just leaning back and shaking his head once more as he looked down at you with a disapproving glare. “Guess, I’ll just take you back home.” 

Your heart leaped into your throat, your stomach twisted into a pit of anguish, you grabbed Shanks’ wrist and yelled. “Wait! No, I’m ok now! I just-I just was surprised, but I want to do this, I swear-please don’t leave me again.” Your tears welled up again as you blubbered on pleas for Shanks to stay. Shanks yanks you forward, bringing you chest to chest with him, “You really want this?” You nod frantically, Shanks smiles at that, wiping away your fat tears with the back of his hand. “You know what to say then, right? Tell me how much you want my cock, sweetie.” 

You nod again, gulping down shakily, “I want it, I want your cock to fuck me, please, Shanks, please.” Shanks gripped your chin forcefully, applying pressure as his eyes darken over when he stared down at you. “Yeah? Are you going to be a good girl now and listen?” “Yes, yes, please, I’ll be good for you, I’m a good girl for you, Shanks.” Shanks growls, releasing your chin and twisting your body around so your back is now to him, as he bends you over the hood of his car. “Good, but that doesn’t mean you’re not gonna get punished for what you did earlier.” 

You didn’t really know what you did that warrant a punishment but you were too afraid to get on Shanks’ bad side again and make him leave so you complied. Hands scrambling to find purchase on the slippery surface of the car’s hood as you got spanked. You cried in pain, begging for him to go a bit softer but he answered you with another spank, “Take your punishment like a big girl.” Smack! Smack! Your legs barely were able to keep you up at this point, being pushed aside by Shanks’ knees as he positioned himself behind your entrance, his bulbous head gliding over your folds twice. 

Collecting some of your arousal on his tip before he started pushing it in, the stinging pain combined with the pain of being stretched out almost made you pass out but you held on. Shanks lets out a hefty sigh as he fully bottoms out inside of you, hands reaching over to play with your clit to give you some relief as he angles his hips back and slam into you. Over and over again, wet plaps sounded in the air mixed along with his grunts and your soft whimpers and moans. His other hand holds on to your hips firmly, pulling you back on his cock as you bounce off with each smack.

Whether it was because Shanks was a good fuck, the pain and exhaustion of everything before, or a combination of all, you felt another orgasm coming on quick. Your stomach coiled up but your lips couldn’t form any words to let Shanks know that you were about to burst. But he felt it though, from how much your cunt started to tighten up around him. 

“That’s it, baby, take it, take my cock in that slutty pussy of yours.”

He starts to go faster.

Plaps Plaps Plaps

“Not such a fuckin bitch, anymore, aren’t cha? Just needed to get fucked and you’re behaving well, again.”

Plaps Plaps Plaps Plaps

“Nghh, fuck, good girl, such a good pussy for me, fuck, I love you.”

And with that being said, you released the coil in your stomach, squirting all over his cock, as Shanks groaned and pulled out, grabbing your shoulder and pulling you down on your knees in front of him. “Open.” He grasped open your chin, tapping his cock on your cheek until your tongue lolled out, spurts of hot white cum covered your face and mouth. He lets go so you could swallow down the bitter substance. After a few seconds of panting from the both of you, Shanks leaves you for a bit, as you hear the sound of his car door opening and rustling, Shanks comes back with a bag. 

Grabbing some towels and wipes from the bag, he starts to clean you up, gently and lovingly, all the while praising you for your effort. Your mind was in turmoil after this sudden switch, your thoughts went back to what he said before. “I love you.” You wondered if he really did mean that, “There, all cleaned up, you did a great job, baby.” He planted a sweet kiss on your forehead and helped you on your feet, ushering you in the passenger seat once more. You slumped in the chair, inhaling the crisp clean of his air freshener and the leather seats. 

“Now, where do you like to shop for clothes, baby?” You tilt your head at his question, making him chuckle; “What? I can’t let you go back home looking like that, now can I? Don’t worry though, I’ll pay for everything, just let me know what you want and where to go, sweetie.” He started up the car and began heading back down the hill. Turning the radio on on a nice volume, as the two of you rode in silence for most of the time. You look over to him alot, with fear, confusion, admiration, love, lust, and so many other emotions swirling around inside of you. 

You needed answers but you didn’t know what questions you should ask first. Do you really love me? What was that about? Do you do this to other girls too? Why did you hurt me? What am I to you? However the only question that you ended up asking Shanks that night was; “Can I see you again soon?” Shanks looks at you, with that charming smile of his, and brushes his hand on your cheek; “Of course, baby, I’m not letting you go that easily.”

[sweetbillwriting]

Way Out of Line

THREE

Beneath my perfume and make-up I'm just a baby in disguise. And though I know that it's wrong to be alone with him that "come on look" is in my eyes.

Character: Keith Toshko from Barbarian (2022) played by Bill Skarsgård.

Warnings: 18+, NSFW, heavy themes.

Notes: This will not be everyone's cup of tea. And I'm a rookie haha.

I followed the movement of his soft lips, and instead of feeling the excited urgency, I felt my body become mush in his arms, and my sex pulsed in the same rhythm. I moaned into his mouth, and I could feel him smile.

“That's it, honey…” he whispered encouragingly between kisses, and it made me giggle. It was something about how he guided me that was both sexy but also domineering. It was overwhelming to kiss him, to be so close to him in a way I hadn't been with my ex-boyfriend, Tim. There was a feeling in my chest that slowly spread to my limbs and made me feel dirty in all sorts of ways, and after a while the negative feelings took over. This was not me. I wasn't the type of girl who kissed married men, especially a man much older than me. I had always been the boring girl, who didn’t push the rules. I released his lips with a smack, and he looked at me with big eyes. He must have noticed my change of emotions.

“I'm sorry,” he said, fast and pulled away. I looked down at the ground, but I could see his feet nervously move. “I should go…”

I didn't look up and didn't say anything because suddenly I felt so uncomfortable and shy about it all. I was not a sexual person, and he was old. He really was old. He could have had children my age. I heard him leave my room, and I breathed out in relief. It was not a good idea; still, I could feel a pain between my legs, like a frustrated cramp. The shame got even worse. It was filthy and heavy in my chest. He was my dad's friend; it wasn't okay.

It was hard to sleep after that moment with Keith, and the anxiety crept around in my body like hungry insects, especially because I could still feel the pressure between my legs. I ran to the bathroom every fifteen minutes in the belief that I needed to pee, but I didn't need that relief; I needed an intrusion. I had never really masturbated, but after having laid with my legs crossed without being able to release the pressure, I needed something more effective; I needed something inside me. I didn't have the knowledge to make myself come, but it was enough to be penetrated for me to finally be able to sleep, even if I felt dirty by my own sexual feelings. I didn't want to feel what I did, so I tried to deny them. They weren't real; they were not me, just something my brain created after a bit too much alcohol.

×××

I had a weird feeling in my body when I started to wake up, like a nagging feeling of forgotten anxiety, and even if I wanted to ignore it, I started to search in my brain for the answer. At first I couldn't remember it, but when I moved and realized my panties were off and I just laid in my tank top, I remembered how I had slipped a finger deep inside of me to be able to sleep. I remembered the passionate kisses with Keith that had made me so sexually frustrated I had humped my own hand. It all was so dirty and shameful, and I looked down at my hand, disgusted by how deep my fingers had been in me. I tried to tell myself it was a one-time thing and stood up from bed even if I didn't have panties on. I couldn't even see them, and for a second I imagined Keith had crept into my room and stolen them, but it was then I found them tangled in my cover. I put them on, just to have something on, on my way to the bathroom to take a shower. Just like Christianity had told me, I tried to wash my sins away; I tried to scrub away my dirty thoughts and massage away every shameful feeling. It did kind of work, and I decided that I would forget about it all and leave it all behind. I fooled myself into believing I could do that and got myself to forget Keith actually lived in the house.

It wasn't that easy to move on when the man in my dirty imaginations sat by the kitchen table, eating egg and bacon with my father. He was there, and as soon as I saw him, I forgot my thoughts were sinful and embraced them instead of denying them. I didn't care if I was dirty, I didn't care if he was my dad's friend or that he was older than me. I remembered the image of his bulge in his sweatpants and thought about how his cock looked hard. I wanted him inside of me instead of my short fingers.

“Hey, honey, come and sit down with us,” said my dad who patted the chair next to him. There was a setting for one more person, and it was probably for me because my mom most often ate earlier than me and my dad. My dad was dressed in a comfortable jogging set, but Keith was dressed in jeans and a black zip hoodie. His hair was styled back, and it could be so that he had plans to go out that day. We glanced at each other quickly, but both of us looked away, and I sat down next to my dad, who gave me a side hug and patted my cheek.

“Slept well?” He asked and started to put up eggs on my plate. He knew I didn't eat bacon. I looked away, uncomfortable with the question, but gave him a low, “yeah.”

“Do you have any plans for today?”

He didn't ask me about my New Year's celebration or if I had been drinking; for him, it was probably obvious I had been a good girl and that Mom exaggerated.

“Um, I think I’ll just have a movie marathon…”

My dad grimaced, and I looked at him confused.

“What?”

“I'm sorry honey, but Disney doesn't work at the moment…”

“What?” I asked with a whiny voice. My dad looked at me almost in shame and played with one of my long locks that fell forward over my light yellow robe.

“I know, I can't log in and—”

“You can use my account,” said Keith suddenly, and by reflex I looked at his handsome face even if I didn't want to. He licked his lips that were shiny with grease, and he gave me a fast look before looking down at his bacon again. “Is there something special you want to see?”

“She always starts the new year with hopeful movies, right, honey? So Peter Pan and Alice in Wonderland?” My dad said with a smirk. I just nodded a little. Maybe my choice of movies also was childish and embarrassing, but Disney was such a natural part of my life I didn't think of it like that. I looked at Keith again. He had a stubbly top lip, and a strand of his hair didn't want to be a part of his slicked-back hairstyle and fell down in his eyes. He was too handsome to be a friend of my father's. He was way too handsome to want to kiss me. But he had.

“Thank you…” I mumbled and took the juice pitcher so I wouldn't need to look at him.

“We will go into town soon; Keith has a meeting, and I need to buy some things. Your mom is out with Felice, so you will be alone for a while. But I guess you can handle that? Now when you have Disney?”

“Yes, daddy,” I said and smiled at him. I could hear that I sounded like a ten-year-old, but we had that sort of relationship, so it was hard for me to stop. My dad always worried about me, and I was always eager to please him. Keith cleared his throat, but I didn't dare to look at him, and I wondered if he judged me for my polite behavior towards my father. He probably regretted that he had kissed someone like me, a silly girl.

×××

“You can fly!” Shouted the kids in Peter Pan while I sat stretched out on the couch with a bowl of ice cream in my lap. I still wore just pajamas even if it was 3 pm. I giggled a bit to myself when I thought about how many times I had pretended to be Lena, waiting for Peter Pan to come through my window. My biggest wish had been to never grow up. I had a nice time being alone and had no problems with it, so I was a bit disappointed when I heard the front door open.

“I'm so sorry, Keith, really. Do you want anything to eat or something?” Said my mom with worry. I turned down the sound in curiosity and tried to listen closely. It sounded like there were several feet in the hallway, and I could hear my dad clear his throat.

“No…” said Keith with a wobbly voice and sniffled. “I think I'm going to bed for a while… But thank you.”

It was obvious Keith was crying, and it made my throat dry up and start to scratch. There was something about hearing him like that that made me uncomfortable in so many ways, and I noticed how my hands were shaking too. I listened to him walking up the stairs slowly, but also my dad's deep exhalation after Keith had closed the bedroom door.

“Shit, Giselle… I really thought they would get together again,” said my father with a low voice, so low I almost didn't hear him. My mom's reply I actually couldn’t hear because she was whispering. I paused the movie and laid my hand on my chest. My heart was beating hard, and the dry feeling in my throat was now a painful barbed wire string from my heart up to my mouth. I understood what was happening, but I wanted to know more, so carefully I walked out to my parents in the hallway. My mom was hanging up Keith's bomber jacket while my dad was sitting down on the bench we had by the door. Both of them looked up at me when I tiptoed out to them.

“What's happening?” I asked, pretending like I hadn't heard as much as I had. My mom opened her mouth to say something, but my dad interrupted her.

“He got served with the divorce papers… So he is, of course, really upset.”

I nodded a little bit and looked down at the ground. I tried to keep my facial expressions in check because I was the only one of us three that knew Keith had been with another woman just the night before: me.

“Can you keep an eye on him?”

I heard what my dad said, but at first I couldn't understand the words and what he meant by them.

“Huh?” I looked at him confused and played with the thin bands of my tank top.

“We need to go grocery shopping. Can you take care of him?”

“Like how?” I asked, and I could feel my cheeks heat. My parents must have noticed, but they didn't understand why they became so rosy and must have made their own conclusions.

“Just check if he wants something if he comes out of the room. Nothing more than that.”

I nodded, and my dad gave me a thankful smile. They put on their outerwear again and left me alone with Keith. Their little girl and their old friend. They didn't have a thought, or even a half thought, that something could happen; that their little girl wasn't so innocent and the friend wasn't so trustworthy.

I continued to watch Peter Pan, but my thoughts drifted away to Keith over and over. I felt sorry for him and wondered if I should do something, but I was also afraid he would come down, and that I would need to comfort him. I thought about the night before, and in the light of day, I wasn't ashamed of it. I wasn't ashamed I had wanted him. Now I wasn't ashamed that he was married either because he would divorce, and the rest I could pretend were trivialities. I wanted him but I was scared of how much. I had never felt those sorts of feelings before, and it was frightening to feel how much I could lose myself in them.

“Hey…”

I turned to the doorway where Keith walked into the large room. His eyes were brimmed with red, but he wasn’t crying. He could have just been really tired, but I knew he wasn't, and the sniffle also exposed him.

“Hey…” I repeated and moved my legs and the blanket so that he could sit down on the other end of the couch. He sighed deeply and turned his gaze towards the TV. Something told me he just didn't want to be alone, so I didn't say anything, and just let him watch the ticking crocodile. I looked at him carefully a couple of times, and he smiled a little at the TV, and that made me smile too. After 20 minutes I dared to look at him completely, and he looked back at me and scratched his neck.

“Are you okay?” I asked carefully and sat up a bit better on the couch. Keith also sat up a little and took off his zip hoodie revealing the black t-shirt he wore underneath.

“Yeah… I knew this would happen. I just… It's a lot to take in, you know?”

I didn't know. How should I know? I had never been married, and my only relationship had ended when I was eighteen because Tim felt it became too serious, but I nodded anyway. Keith breathed heavily and dragged his hands over his thighs over and over. Something with his behavior made me feel braver, and I removed the blanket from my legs and scooted closer to him.

“Do you need a hug?”

Keith turned his eyes towards me, and for a moment we stared at each other intensely. As I sat next to him, I could see how he looked down over my body, especially my hardened nipples under my top. He looked up at me again and then moved my hair away so it fell behind my shoulders. He looked down at my chest again, this time more obviously. Just like the night before, a foreign feeling took over me that made me more confident and daring, so I pulled down one of the straps of my tank top slowly revealing one of my naked breasts for him to see. I looked him straight in the eyes while I did it and saw his eyes fall down to my chest when my nipple was exposed. Keith looked up at my eyes again and moved so he sat more towards me.

“You're such a beautiful girl…” His voice was low and raspy, and he laid his hand on my neck with his thumb on my jugular. I could feel the pressure between my legs grow again when he dragged his lips over mine sensually.

“My beautiful baby girl…” he whispered, putting some pressure over my neck. I moaned into his mouth when he kissed me and I laid my hands on his thick thighs. His hand moved down from my neck to my chest, and he released my lips to be able to look at his long fingers playing with my nipple.

“I've noticed your nipples are always so hard... Is it because you think so many dirty thoughts?” He looked up at me with a smirk and pinched my nipple hard. A pained groan left my lips, but the feeling also travelled down between my legs and made it hammer quickly. I didn't know what to say, so I let him kiss me again while my breast disappeared in his wide palm. His other hand held my head and steered me into every kiss. He used more and more tongue which made me feel that overwhelming feeling again. I was a good girl, but something took over me and gave me feelings I had learned to feel shame about. I was horny. I was so horny and wanted him in the dirtiest ways.

I dragged my hand over his crotch and could feel there was something alive under the denim. There was something moving in there. Keith pulled back a little so I could watch while he unbuckled his belt with a jiggle. I couldn't look away; I didn't want to look away. I wanted to see it. I wanted to see his cock. I thought of the word in my head: “cock.” I had never said it, but I knew I would call it that. He had a cock. My ex-boyfriend had a “penis.” Sometimes a “dick,” when I wanted to sound more relaxed, but I knew Keith had a cock.

He unbuttoned his jeans and pushed them down to the floor so that he wore just a pair of white boxers that didn't hide at all what was under them. I could see something long and thick and big balls being restrained under the tight material. Keith dragged a hand over the thick member causing the fabric to stretch even tighter. I could see veins and the shape of the head. I couldn't look away even if I felt I was blushing down to my chest.

“Have you seen one before?” He asked softly. His voice didn't match how dirty he looked with his legs wide apart and his cock trying to break free from the thin fabric. I just replied with a nod because my voice had disappeared at the same time my pussy had gotten wetter and wetter.

“You're not a virgin?” He asked and took hold of my chin so we could look each other in the eyes. I shook my head, and he looked at me with furrowed brows.

“I want you to talk to me. Hmm? Can you talk to me, baby girl?” He asked, pinching my nipple hard. I didn't know if that was some sort of punishment for not talking or if he just wanted to wake me up, but he got me to make a sound and then nod.

“I can talk…”

“Are you a virgin?” He asked again. I wondered why he asked that twice while I looked at him doe-eyed.

“No. I had a boyfriend.”

Keith nodded and gave me a soft kiss. He continued to kiss me softly, which made me relax. I felt safe with him, and when he leaned back and looked at me with kind eyes, I felt I needed to tell him something.

“It was a long time ago… And he was nothing like you. I… It feels new with you. You make me feel things…” Keith smiled a little and pulled me up on his lap. My pussy was pressed against his balls, and I could feel the hammering start again. I looked down at his crotch, seeing the thick line. Was it really that big?

“Do you want to see?” He asked, taking a hold of my chin again so I would look up at him. I looked between his eyes and lips, and that made him lean forward so I could press my lips against his again. I invaded his mouth with my tongue, but he slowed me down again when he took hold of my neck.

“Slow down, honey…”

My hands laid on his chest as I blushed. The feelings were everywhere, and I felt that intense pressure between my legs again. I was forced to sit down on his thigh and press myself hard against him.

“Does your little pussy hurt?” I looked up at him and nodded. Somehow it had become so much of an embarrassment that I worried it would be a permanent feeling. Keith sat up and shifted me from his lap, so I stood between his legs. He dragged his big hands over my hips and then took hold of my pajama pants and panties with his index finger. He looked up at me with a smile.

“Can I take them off?”

I nodded a little, too mesmerized by him and drunk on newly discovered feelings. Carefully he pulled them off, and I stepped out of them, so I stood in just my strappy top. Keith took my hands in his so I wouldn't be able to conceal myself when he leaned back. Now it was him who looked overwhelmed, and I could see his cock twitch.

“Completely shaved?”

“Yeah?”

“That was…” He cleared his throat and stared between my legs like he hadn't seen a woman naked before. “It was a long time ago… Can I touch?” He looked up at me with those big puppy eyes, and to my own surprise, I sat down over his legs. Straddling him with the soles of my feet pressed against the outside of his thighs. He could see everything.

A loud moan fell from his lips just by the sight of me like that as he dragged a hand over and over his member.

“Is this just for me?” He whispered, running his hands on the inside of my thighs. “Or do you give yourself to other men like this?”

I shook my head.

“Just you. You make me crazy.”

“Yeah?” Keith leaned forward and kissed my knee, then the inside of my thigh.

“I don't know what's happening with me…”

Keith smiled sweetly, then he turned his full attention to my pussy again. Carefully he put two fingers against me, shaped like a V, and massaged my outer lips, feeling my smooth skin. He breathed heavily, and after a while he let his middle finger drag between the lips, collecting my wetness. I could feel him stroke a spot higher up that made my whole body tingle, but to my disappointment, he just dragged his fingertip there teasingly. Instead, his goal was to penetrate me with his finger, and I wasn't all prepared for how rough he would do it. His fingers were long and thick, so when he pushed it in quite violently, my entrance cramped up at first and the pain shot out to my limbs.

“So tight... So tight...” he whispered. I had closed my eyes from the shock, but when he had started to pump his middle finger in and out of me in an even rhythm, I opened my eyes. The image before me shocked me because Keith had pulled out his thickness and jerked himself off in the same rhythm that he finger fucked me in. He was even bigger when I saw his cock like that, even while his big hand held it. He let his finger slip out of me and looked at me with such a sweet expression it was hard for me to not giggle.

“What?” He asked, showing off his deep dimple in his cheek. I giggled again, and he dragged his hands over my thighs. After having been watching each other for a while, he moved me away from him. The thought of him being pleased and finished stressed me, but he just pulled off his boxers completely so I could see his cock fully exposed. Had Tim been that big? Far from it. Did he really push that into girls? It wasn't possible. I continued to stare. I had just seen Tim's and had never really looked at it. I had chosen to never go down on him, and we had sex in the dark, but here I now sat next to a grown man that I had the feeling was quite well endowed. I wish I could say it was pretty, but a man's genitals were something else. It looked scary to me.

Keith smiled and pulled me closer so I could have my head against his shoulder, then he laid my hand on his thigh so I could decide myself if I wanted to touch.

“It's okay, honey, take your time…” he said and dragged his fingers through my hair. I looked up at him. It was so nice how sweet he was about it all and how much he took care of me. He really was such a man. I kissed him again and pushed my nose tip against his cheek. It felt like I was falling for him. That sweet, wonderful man. With his big cock. I looked down again and wrapped my fingers around him, feeling his girth and weight in my hand. Keith made a deep exhalation, but let me explore by myself. I dragged my hand all the way up to the head, feeling the mushroom tip against my palm. It was really wet, and I took the wetness in my hand when I dragged my hand all the way down to his balls. I looked at them a bit confused. I didn't know if I should touch them. I had never heard about that. I looked back at Keith, who sat with his head leaned back against the headrest, and he seemed to understand what I was wondering.

“I want you to play with them, roll them in your hands, squeeze them a bit carefully…” His voice was much deeper than before, so I looked at him with the biggest eyes. He smiled at me lovingly.

“You're so cute. Such a good girl.” I giggled a little at his praise and then looked down at his cock again, still in my hand.

I sat up a little so I could use both my hands, so with one hand I started to roll his balls in my hand; it felt a bit awkward, and Keith probably felt it too because he spoke up.

“Spit on them… Spit in your hands, baby...”

I looked at him confused, so instead he took my hands and pulled them towards his mouth where he spit several times into them. Long, watery saliva threads landed in my hands, but I wasn't grossed out. All of it was sexy in the heat of the moment. When I started to roll his balls in my hand again, they glided better, and with his hand over mine, we jerked his slick cock. He showed me the pressure he wanted. His breathing became more heavy with every stroke. I saw how his t-shirt had ridden up and how I could see a deep v-line but also a hint of abs. I leaned back looking at him with furrowed brows and how his wide chest rose and fell with each deep breath. He was so gorgeous. He was so sexy. I released his balls so I could touch myself, but when Keith noticed, he pulled me up over him and steered my pussy towards his cock.

“Take it. Fuck me.” He said it lowly, but I didn't dare. It was too big. “Take my cock. Take daddy's cock, baby girl.”

I looked at his face intensely, meeting his dark, lustful gaze. I wanted to but also didn't. I needed to make a decision. But not then and there, because when I looked out the window, I saw our neighbor Mr. Gardner look through the window, straight at us.

×

[sweetteainthesummerx]

THE LOVE LASTS SO LONG (5)

In which ollie and aubrey text for the first time

series masterlist

★・・・・★・・・・ ★・・・・★

whitejadetigermovie posted

whitejadetigermovie our stars at the premiere!

WHITE JADE TIGER OUT IN THEATRES NEAR YOU

tagged: dallasliu, aubreyyang

liked by alexandrasaintmleux, walker.scobell and 882,007 others

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aubreyyang WOO HOO LET GO!!!

dallasliu so proud of everyone who helped make this happen

username1 wow they look so good

dior.n.goodjohn YES MY BABIES YOUVE SLAYED SO HARD

-- aubreyyang ILY DIOR

CNO MEDIA

NEWEST ARTICLES

White Jade Tiger, the newest historical drama premiered January 20th, 2025 at the TCL Chinese Theatre. The event was gorgeous with contemporary art featuring Asian artists. CNO media managed to snag a couple of interviews. View them down below.

Clip: An interviewer smiles at Aubrey, and she greets him with a wave and an excited grin.

I: Hey, it's great to see you!

A: Thanks! It's so nice to see everyone here to support the movie.

I: Speaking of the movie, are you surprised by the success?

A: Honestly, yeah. Very much, actually! Especially with a predominantly Asian cast, not a lot of movies like White Jade Tiger get so much traction. John, our director is an absolute genius. I learned so much from him.

I: Yeah, very true. Crazy Rich Asians was a complete hit. Anyways, congratulations! I just have a few questions for you.

A: Ooh, okay!

I: Alright. What is your favourite Asian snack?

A: Definitely boba. Does that count?

I: Haha, sure. What was your favourite scene to film?

A: Um, I think anything that was in the nature. I love B.C..

I: What was your go to entertainment on set?

A: (laughs, and flushes slightly) I watched a lot of Formula 1 and 2 on set. I got to go to the Monaco Grand Prix like what, four months ago? It was super fun.

I: Would you like to go again?

A: Well, yeah, of course! It's Formula 1, who wouldn't want to go? (smiles and shrugs)

I: Well, if anyone wants to sponsor her...

A: (looks and points at camera) You heard it here! (giggles)

I: Thanks for your time Aubrey, enjoy the night.

A: Thank you! I hope you like the movie. (waves and starts off towards the next press interview)

aubreyyang posted on their story

Caption: White Jade Tiger premiere! Go check it out in theatres near you 🐅

olliebearman replied to story

hey! congrats on the movie 😁

aubreyyang

hi and ty :)

olliebearman

it was really nice meeting you in monaco

aubreyyang

yeah! I had so much fun hopefully I can come to another race soon

olliebearman

let me know if your coming and we can get together w Charles and alex

aubreyyang

for sure ☺️

I need to head off to bed, but see u soon!

olliebearman

goodnight 😴

aubreyyang posted

aubreyyang coming soon...

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user1 UAHEHKFN DIRECTOR ERA WHAT WHAT WHAT

dior.n.goodjohn can't wait 🤫

-- aubreyyang hehehe

alexandrasaintmleux text me rn!!

-- aubreyyang yes ma'am!!

-- smoothoperatorrr55 their friendship means everything to me MOTHERSSS

dallasliu working hard or hardly working

-- aubreyyang shouldn't u be on set rn go get that bag

-- user2 theyre so sibling coded

-- daubrey009 NOOO

-- f1girlypop sorry y'all after that vid w ollie theres no way

ACTORS NEW E-MAGAZINE

AUBREY YANG'S DIRECTING DEBUT

Aubrey Yang, Hollywood's sweetheart at age 18, announces her directing debut with short film Pelt, a coming-of-age story discovering the complexities of femininity and identity. Attending New York University as a film and classics student since age 16, the former of her majors is coming to use as this film started off as a finals project.

"It's so crazy," Yang tells us over coffee, "that my school project is being bought out and brought to Hollywood". The young actress turned director "loves acting with [her] whole heart" but working behind the camera certainly has intrigue.

Filming took place over the last five months, only weeks after her movie with up and coming star Dallas Liu premiered. Her success is astounding: she has won more awards before she can legally drink than most people in this industry do in their whole careers. Maybe another award is coming for this young star, only in the creative category.

dior.n.goodjohn posted

dior.n.goodjohn Pelt has been nominated for Best Short Film and Best Screenplay for London Film Week!

I am so honoured to work on my best friend's debut as a director and screen-writer. There are no words to describe seeing someone so passionate for something they do and be recognized for it. This film is our baby, so go watch it, out now on multiple platforms!

tagged: aubreyyang

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aubreyyang when I asked you to play este in the film, I knew you would kill it. The insane vulnerability and dimension you brought to the character and screenplay is the only reason we're being nominated. you have exceeded my expectations for my finals project, and helped me bring my vision to life. London here we come baby ❣️

-- diorrrdear IM GOING TO CRY I JUST WATCHED IT AND ITS SO GUT WRENCHINGLY SAD AND ANGSTY

-- user1 "Hollywood never writes complicated female characters" UR WRONG BC AUBREY YANG IS HOLLYWOOD

dallasliu ate 🍽️

-- dior.n.goodjohn 4 + 4

user2 literally no one cares stop pushing this narrative of being a woman is hard like shut up u don't even deserve the nominations

-- aubrollielovess who?

-- user2 ?

-- aubrollielovess who tf asked u get outta here

olliebearman posted

olliebearman Home race this weekend, feeling like P1 🫡

tagged: scuderiaferrari

liked by kimi.antonelli, aubreyyang and 699,007 others

user1 photo 2 is so slutty he knows what hes doing

-- user2 he turned 20 got a f1 seat and is living the life I too would be a little slutty

scuderiaferrari sliverstone circuit you never disappoint ❤️

smoothoperatorrr55 MY PIPELINE AUBREY IS GOING TO BE IN LONDON

-- user3 stop ur embarrassing urself

kimi.antonelli 💪

user4 hes doing so well for his first year on the grid PROUD OF U BABY BEARMAN

★・・・・★・・・・ ★・・・・★

Taglist: @callsignwidow @honethatty12

© sweetteainthesummerx.tumblr. all rights reserved. unauthorized copying, translation, or claiming of my writing or any works as your own is strictly prohibited.

[formerlycookierunauprompts]

Requested by @deirdredeity (I accidentally deleted the og ask because tumblr was being fussy) :

OMG?? 🤯🤯 whattttt omgggg fuck being an anon I’m the one who requested the flustered reader shi (mmm was an anon bcz I didn’t wanna embarrass myself but whatever) omg dayumm you went crazy with it and I’m more than satisfied 😍 you always EAT (get it? haha.. eat.. and shadow milk.. haha) I love it tysm ❤️❤️ glad that I didn’t accidentally break a rule hehe.. we love girlboss girlfailures in here 😘 didn’t expect it to be that spicy but nevertheless I am GLAD ty for this juicy piece also you said currently he’s sealed so continuation where bro is UNsealed? 🤯🫣 (jk don’t take me too seriously I have a mental age of 5 jokes aside thank you i really appreciate it, it turned out super well way beyond expectations I was expecting like a few pickup lines or smooches but definitely not this it blew me out of the water hard tytytyty ily❤️)

Alright bet I get to go crazy again

Requested Prompts #43 - 💓

There's a ringing in your ears, what the hell happened? You just wanted to take a nap... yet it feels like you were in a dome of glass that just shattered. You can feel a poking against your cheek, it's something large, metalic and- wait. You crack open your eyes, just enough to see the intimidating form of Silent Salt staring you down. You're lucky that the beasts consider you... actually, you don't know what they really think of you. Do they think you're their pet? Their friend? a Frenemy? Well, either way you were their warden. " Silent Salt...?" You groan, pushing yourself up from the ground. Silent Salt says nothing, merely just pointing a ways in front of you to- ... hold on, WHAT THE FUCK??? " THE SEAL???" You exclaim, looking at the humongous crack in the realm of the seal. It pulsed with a blue, shadowy energy, which could only mean that Shadow Milk had escaped. And that was bad, very bad, because it meant that you were failing at your job. And... with how big that crack was you doubted that Elder Faerie was on the outside trying to wrangle Shadow Milk back into the seal... Meaning that you had to go outside to get him back in, but doing so would leave the other beasts unattended. Either way, you're failing at your job. So what choice do you really have? You look back at Silent Salt. " Uh... thanks for letting me know?" You said to him, to which earned you a thumbs up in response. You quickly pondered on your choice before looking back to Silent Salt. " Try not to escape while I'm gone, I don't want to double fail at my job." You tell him before running off towards the crack in the seal.

----

As you expected, everything was chaos. Possessed faerie cookies lingered, danced, and fooled around all around you. There were quite a few things that were on fire and the echoes of twisted laughter almost mocked you as you steeled yourself. None of them were who you were looking for despite the resemblance he'd dressed them up in. " Dammit... where would he go if he got out on his own?" You muttered to yourself as you looked around. Fortunately, you could narrow it down to a few places, unfortunately you realized that you are but one cookie. You cannot traverse the entirety of Beast Yeast in just a few minutes or so, it'd take you a few days realistically and by then all the other beasts would have likely gotten out! Were you really fucked no matter what? Probably. You took a deep breath, if anything he'd probably be in some kind of gigantic theater- Well wouldn't you know, there's a gigantic theater right over there that's just oozing with Shadow Milk's aura. There was no way he wouldn't be there, and so that's where you'd go. Hopefully you'd be able to drag him back to the seal.

----

Shadow Milk watched as those pesky little heroes ran about, celebrating as if they'd truly won. Those poor, ignorant fools! They really thought that they'd actually sealed him away in the tree again? They'd been running around in his silly little maze ever since he'd taken hold of the new half-a-cookie guardian's little friends! It was honestly quite pathetic how they hadn't realized they'd been tricked into a false sense of security, he was literally the beast of deceit! Everyone's most beloved Trickster! Tricking them into this just felt too... easy, too boring. He could try his hand at getting Silly-Vanilly to chop down the tree, all he has to do is show him the truth! And why wouldn't he want to know the truth if he embodied it? Unless he was willing to live in a lie... then he was much farther from the Truth than Shadow Milk thought- His train of thought was interrupted when the doors of his theater of lies swung open. " Hm?" That was... odd. Elder Faerie certainly shouldn't be alive, White Lily and co are stuck in his maze of deceit, so then who...? There you stood, looking quite peeved off if he had to say so himself. " Oh! Little Warden, how thrilling that you've come to make an appearance!" He chirped, casting his view of the maze to the side. The maze could wait, his little warden was here! " Shadow Milk Cookie!" You called out, pointing at him accusingly. " You will return to the great seal immediately! And that is an order from the Warden of the Seal!" You commanded him, don't mind the quick pov switch but it was frustrating enough that Shadow Milk escaped in the first place, and now he had the audacity to give you such a smug grin in reply? " Oh Little Warden..." Shadow Milk began, laying on his stomach as he rested his chin on the back of his hand. " It's so so so cute that you think that you can order me around like that~! I'm a free cookie now, and that means that I can do whatever I want again~!" He chirped with a flourish of his free hand, you could see the excited mania dancing in his eyes, you couldn't allow this to stand. " Okay, but you haven't actually earned your freedom at all. You just waited until the seal was weak enough so you could break out!" You retorted, which may have been the wrong thing to say judging by the way his grin dropped for a moment. He soon broke out into a maniacal cackle, seeming to have found your words hilarious. " Ehe he he ha ha hah! Sure, I may have done that, but does it really matter?" He teased, reaching out a clawed hand and picking you up by the edge of your cloak. You shrieked as you were hoisted into the air, you didn't have the protection of the seal that kept you from crumbling while in the real world, so your life was in a lot more danger here. " Ack- Put me down! Or at the very least hold me properly!" You protest as you squirm in place, you feel a shudder run through your dough as the beast before you lets out a low, rumbling chuckle.

" And why should I? You adorable little morsel~" He purrs, flipping you around in his hand so that you were laying on your back on his palm instead of dangling in the air. God fucking dammit, he was doing this again. He knows every, single, god damn weak spot of yours and by god does he abuse them frequently, mainly because they mostly relate to him. " You-!!" You protest, quickly shutting up when you feel his breath wash over you like a wave of hot air. And the way he's looking at you is already making you weak- No, you have to stay strong. " You know..." You hear him begin and fuck when did he get so close? There's a certain glint in his eyes, one that both intrigues you and makes you fear for your life. " I never really got a taste of you like I wanted to... Care to let me just have one little bite? Or maybe just a taste... either would be fine~" He teased with the low, stupidly sexy voice of his. You could already feel his lips at the tips of your little cookie feet, ready to open and swallow them whole if you let him. You could already feel your face turning cherry red, and you knew that he could see it judging by the slight excitement that made itself known in his eyes. You felt tempted to indulge him, but you also didn't want to lose your feet... But maybe he'd go back to the seal? No, he wouldn't... Would he? Or maybe he won't just go for your feet, he's teased you multiple times about gobbling you up in one bite. So if you give him this will he just... eat you? Apparently, you took too long to decide. You felt something moist and blue against your arm, a semi-satisfied hum creeping out of the beast holding you captive. " Mmn... I was right, you really are a sweet little treat. One that I can have all to myself~" Shadow Milk purred, his face looming over you as he left you to process what he'd done. You were in for a long ride, weren't you?

----

AUGHIJBSGHGKSHG I CAN'T, I CAN'T WRITE ANYMORE/lh Shadow milk... you bastard why must you make me FEEL THINGS????

but, uh, i hope you enjoyed and if anyone wants to continue this then PLEASE.

[rom-e-o]

MW!Rook: I never took advanced classes. Got too... busy.

Now I'm intrigued by the thought of a Rook who ends up deciding to continue their Watcher studies after defeating Elgar'nan and Ghilan'nain, taking the advanced classes and realising that Emmrich Volkarin himself was to be their professor in advanced necromantic arts. Imagine how awkward that must be, trying to maintain a sort of professional distance with a man you saved the world with???? Who you have

Also on a semi-related note-

Just imagining the aftermath of defeating the gods if you chose Harding to lead the other group and just... the Veilguard ends up having some grand celebration for it (with nobility involved because of course they want to have a piece of the pie, to say they were involved, just like the Inquisition after defeating Corypheus)

And Cassandra is there. Maybe Leliana.

And one of them is most certainly pissed at Rook for letting three Inquisition members die. Dorian tries his best to smooth things over, and Rook just feels so, incredibly guilty over what happened. Nothing they say or do will ever make it better, will never change the fact that they lost Varric, Harding, and the Inquisitor all at once. And these were their closest friends.

I feel like it's Josephine or even the Iron Bull who tries to comfort Rook, to tell them that it wasn't their fault (though Iron Bull would be more along the lines of 'they died a warriors' death' sort of thing)

I honestly love that idea. I mean, let's face it, it makes perfect sense MW! Rook in this universe wouldn't have time to devote the study needed to join the more elite Mourn Watch ranks. Even from their talks with Myrna ("Back straight") and Emmrich saying Rook has "advanced adequately", I very much get the vibe that Rook's studies are not their strongest bargaining chip.

But hey, between the War of the Banners and two blighted elven gods, who has the time?

But then, you dive back into your studies after a little final boss-reprieve only to find that your beau is your handsome professor. Unlike Johanna's arrangement, this one is a favorable one. Needless to say, many lessons are tentatively guided with should squeezes, intimate guiding of the ceremonial hand gestures ("raise them higher, darling, just a bit more for me...") and ... desk sex. I don't know if Em could SWEEP everything off the desk like Cullen though, haha. ("That chalice is a relic from the Storm Age! Here, let me put it over here.")

Ohhh, yeah. Harding's death would hurt. Dorian, of course, tries to swoop in, but that's not enough. Same with Varric, even though Rook really can't be blamed for that one. OH GOSH, imagine losing the Inquisitor too. CULLEN, MY MAN. ;;

Leliana and Cassandra ... it would be hard, but they would know their leader did what they had to do. They could honor that, I think. Cassandra would cry, I think. In secret, of course. That was their best friend.

Inky's spouse/lover? MUCH more pissed. Now THAT is a confrontation I want to see - very bittersweet.

I can see Josie doing it (Emmrich and Josie actually have the same writer, so it's poetic that it's her). It just suits her personality so well. But I LOVE it being Bull as well.

"It's hard to lose good men, but they chose to fight. Be proud that you rallied a team that believed in you that much. Who stuck their necks out. That doesn't come around every day."

Some extra Trespasser foreshadowing with that. Just a smudge.

[66sharkteeth]

Weekly thoughts!

Hooboy, the big episode! First off, I think everyone knows by now that you probably shouldn't read these if you haven't read the latest episode, but I ESPECIALLY mean that this week! Talking about some way bigger than usual spoilers.

Phew, this was a big one, both from a writing and drawing perspective. I actually spent a full day on that last panel alone, but writing it took way longer than usual too. Going back and forth between Bell's speech and Jericho's backstory played perfectly like a movie in my head, but it was really hard to portray it as a comic and it was one of the few times I was struggling with the limitations of the format. I think I pulled it off though, since everyone seemed to follow along fine! So while it was probably just a neat scene to everyone else, I'm rather proud of that haha.

As for the actual contents of the episode, I'm also glad everything hit w/ the majority of the audience for the most part. I know a handful were confused about if that was Bell or Jericho who did that, but to those people, I remind you it's been loooong established Jericho can control his extensions (Bell, Charlie, and Claude. Remember, they all took injections of Jericho's blank space?). Also on that note, Bell does not have her own scion... Only Rex and Jericho do. Bell, Charlie and Claude all took injections of Jericho's blank space, thus get to borrow some of his power. I recommend re-reading ep 80 if you need a refresher.

I do consider this ep kind of a big reveal of Jericho's true colors. I mean, you guys have known he's the main villain for ages now, but this is the ep that reveals his "better world for blanks" act is kind of a façade and what he's really seeking is a worse world for humans. The fall of humans benefitting blanks is just kind of a bonus. I'm glad a few people caught onto this with the fact that one of the worst horrors he experienced was having his autonomy taken away from him, then he proceeds to do just that to Bell.

And speaking of Jericho's horrors- Before this season launched, I dropped a bunch of hints about upcoming things. One of them was that the most disturbing scene (in my opinion) was coming up. I was actually referring to what happened to Kallie. I'm not sure if it was as disturbing to everyone else (I totally get like if Claude's leg thing fucked people up more), but being evaporated into nothingness but not dying was an existential dread that really fucks me up haha. If it fucked even a couple of other people up, then I did my job.

I don't have too much else to say about the contents of the episode. It was so hard to bite my tongue for weeks as everyone predicted pretty much every character but Desmond was gonna get it. I'm sorry I don't have too much else to say about him right now given what happened, but I definitely will in the upcoming weeks.

I guess the only other note I have is I might as well address something that bugs me slightly- It's definitely a minority but there's a handful of people who seem done with the series because "too many things go wrong." To which... I'm not sure what to tell ya. I'm fine with critique and criticism to be clear, but honestly, this is one thing I'm actually really confident I'm good at balancing. I'm not sure where people are coming from with "nothing good ever happens in this series" when this season alone has had probably the cutest and fluffiest scenes. Rex has a canon girlfriend, he had his first kiss with her, Desmond was reunited with his sister and learned to accept himself, Lyss learned to move past her trauma and accept blanks, Rex was reunited with Shnee, Rex's scion turns out to be a puppy dog w/ a crush. I'm aware a lot of these got kind of crushed with this latest ep...but that's.. kind of. the. point??? That's how you write tragedy and impactful scenes??

I dunno, maybe this is personal to me because it's ALWAYS bugged me when someone tells me they think a show is bad because it's "too dark." Like no... It's not *bad* because it's too dark, you just don't like dark themes, and that's okay. I TOTALLY get if CoB has gotten too dark for some people- it's definitely hit some hard themes and subjects, but I don't like to accept that as a critique. It just means it's not for you and that's okay. There's a ton of other great comics that are more light-hearted! I think the TLDR of this is it will always annoy me when people say something is bad just because it's not their taste.

Now. That said... everyone is completely valid in their hate of Jericho. I, however, still love him.

[ssruis]

My personal take on the tsukasa + toya dynamic is that like. Tsukasa helped toya a lot by giving him the familial warmth & unwavering support that he was not getting from his own family & encouraged toya to do what HE wanted to do with his own life instead of following what his dad wanted when he didn’t enjoy it, as well as kinda being toya’s only source of normalcy and activities outside of the piano as a kid. It’s not a stretch to say that Tsukasa changed Toya’s life for the better (causing him to meet Akito, discover what he’s actually passionate about, meet VBS, actually communicate with and stand up to his dad) and saved him from a future he would hate, it’s literally stated by Toya. Multiple times. & tsukasa still continues to be a huge supporter of toya and does his best to care for him. This stuff is made obvious over and over again -

(Tsukasa’s Kamiyama festival card story)

(Kamiyama festival)

- but toya also helped tsukasa a lot when they were kids too, even if it’s a bit less obvious (only stated outright in one card story iirc). Toya mentions not actually seeing Saki a lot when he was younger, as she was in and out of the hospital

(NGUC)

So it was typically just him and Tsukasa. Tsukasa’s entire dream in life was sparked by seeing how happy a play made saki, and his strange (said fondly) personality in the present day is because he was constantly trying to make her happy with shows/acting when they were kids. Realized it cheered saki up when he put on the Future World Star personality -> constantly acting/emulating the actors he saw on stage or on tv to make saki (and later toya) happy at a formative age -> it gets baked into his personality -> now it’s not even an act it’s just how he is. It’s incurable. (Not a bad thing, just something that explains why he’s such a freak)

A large part of tsukasa’s identity is also being a big brother, which is made really difficult when you’re separated from your little sister constantly, she’s often suffering and miserable, and there’s nothing you can do to help her. As he mentions frequently, her happiness is a priority for him (sorry you’re gonna have to trust me on that one if you for some reason doubt that. Image limit. You understand. One example of many is in one of Saki’s birthday cards.)

And as hard as it was for Tsukasa to be powerless in that situation, it was way harder for Saki, because she was the one in pain/seriously ill/hospitalized throughout a large portion of her childhood. She mentions that she forced herself not to cry in front Tsukasa as a kid so he wouldn’t be upset (doll festival), and while it was happy tears in that situation it’s a safe bet that she tried to do it with any negative emotions too - but she was also suffering & acting happy all the time in that situation would be impossible for an adult, let alone a small child.

(Toya’s doll festival card story)

Tsukasa couldn’t help Saki, but he could help Toya, and through that he was able to help himself/feel a little better. He could cheer Saki up, but that was about the extent of what he could do - he couldn’t stay in the hospital with her or ease her pain or take away her illness. Toya needed a friend/older brother figure/escape from his dad, which Tsukasa actually could provide. I feel like there was definitely some transference there where Tsukasa (unconsciously) just took all the big brotherisms he couldn’t do with Saki and redirected them towards Toya. Which, again, isn’t a bad thing, because he *was* helping toya through this, they formed a genuine strong bond, and it helped him deal with his emotions. + saki got a bonus brother to play with when she was home.

I think people want to water their relationship down to just “haha tsukasa adopts people as his siblings” which isn’t even true* and ignores the very specific set of circumstances that led to Tsukasa considering Toya his younger brother, and the circumstances that led to Toya seeing Tsukasa as an older brother figure, as well as the fact that they’ve known each other for like a decade at this point AND the fact that their parents are close friends.

Their relationship is so strong because it is built off of them both helping each other, not because Tsukasa randomly saw a sad kid and went “you’re my brother now.” Which is also why I’m not a fan of [x random character] is a tenma.** Plus, does saki’s relationship with that character not also matter? Toya’s relationship with Saki is a pretty big part of why he’s considered a part of the family***, even if he’s not as close to her as he is to tsukasa.

*In Tsukasa’s head a star is a good big brother and given that both of those things are deeply entrenched in his personality, he mother hens his friends & does his best to act like a responsible and reliable person towards everyone. As I’ve mentioned before, Wxs KAITO is a reflection of Tsukasa’s ideal self (reliable big brother/leader figure) - nobody says KAITO is adopting siblings left and right (wrt the other vocaloids/wxs). Notably, irrc, wxs KAITO & normal KAITO both desire to be seen as a reliable big brother figure by others, but as a general thing and not a “this guy is literally my brother” thing. Tsukasa is the same situation. He likes to provide a good example for his juniors because that’s what he believes a star should do, which is also why he gets so irritated about Rui “tarnishing his reputation” whenever they get in trouble, and what prompted him to join the disciplinary committee in his third year after hearing underclassmen be like wow the 1-2 oddball finish are so wacky & crazy. Acting like a big brother =/= literally adopting people as siblings.

** you do you though if you enjoy those head canons more power to you. It’s just not my thing (known canon purist).

*** give me like 10 minutes I have stuff to say about that as well that will have to go in a reblog. Image limit strikes again.

[aves-rook-laidir]

Here are my live notes that i typed out on the Sticker App while playing the game for the first time. - MAJOR SPOILERS -

They are slightly out of order because I was just jumping in typing wherever:

Holy shit it’s on TWO DISCS?!!?

Not me staring at the press any button screen for ages

I like that Neve is like Cassandra, your no 1

Davrin Rook bonded so fast because they were immediately thrown into a dragon battle together and it got really tough real quick

Did Gilhanain just say YOUR BLOOD KNOWS YOU’LL DIE HERE?

Absolutely loved bringing harding as the extra companion, she’s just so exasperated by it all

I do feel like the va tone didn’t always fit with certain more serious situations.

Staring at Solas in photomode, so mixed emotions, mostly exasperation.

So what was he doing at the strart? Putting evanuris in a stronger prison, then tearing down the veil, or? Because if he was just putting them in a new prison, and exlained himself to Varric non of this would be happening.

God damn, someone ask Morrigan about the fith blight, actually, is it even public record who journeyed with the Warden? Was it kept hush hush?

Can wardens still hear the calling if all the high dragons are awakend? Whos calling them in the deep roads?

I wonder if Davrin has a hard time talking about the elven god reveal because he has a special relationship with Halla and Ghilanain was the god of Halla? 

Oh, why would we have Varric's shaving mirror?

Lucanis so fucking weird haha

Davrin - “Couldn’t have asked for a better day” Rook immediately, ungracefully slides down a cliff

Emmrich is making a mistake, why would he want to be immortal, like look at these three imortal clowns running around.

Ok so The Ancient Elves were spirits who took physical forms using the lyrium, which is the blood of the ancient titans, They became the first mages? This caused a war between the elves and the titans

I wish they had shown more of Emmrich getting her out of the fade, because that is his very specific skill, like all the attention Lucanis got about using the dagger, to cement Emrrich's role in all this, I wanna see him being a badass in a direct story point.

The Butcher was scarier than Elghanan, should not have been,

Elghanan should have been wayyyy scarier, less talking.

“The gods they give strength but all they ask in return is everything” dope

Literally fuck off no scene getting her out of the fade, her reacting to getting out, the grief? The Relief? Helo?

“Though Harding also told me” LMAO Emmrich

I feel like it makes more sense for Harding to sneak up on Ghillie, This is her moment, tragic because we’ve seen her whole journey. Harding saying ‘should I take the shot’ at the start of the game then taking guaranteeing Ghilanains death with her simple bow and arrow. and to have this little dreamless thing, created out of the desicrated titans be the last thing she sees, fuck yes.

The first thing they did was retrieve all the bodies. They found Harding and Leliana and the Inquisitor brought her back to her village

Solas: How did you even get out of the fade? Rook: gestures vaguely to Emmrich standing behind her ‘He knows more about the fade than you.'

I wish there was a bit more dialogue with Dorian at the end, saying ‘Do it for Varric and or Harding, won’t you? They were just so…oh, you…know...’

Taash everyone I loves dies NONONO I love you!

‘Everything dies, its what they do’ Including imortal gods

Is solas fucking losing??? fucks sake cant even do one thing

Solas assisting the Shadow Dragons at the end paint a funny picture, like, imaging Dorain trying to evacuate the city and Solas is just also there, after like 10 years. How did that reunion go?

It had to be bellara that got blighted, those gods were hers, that history is hers, and she's just so innocent, it was a great character arc

me the whole time 'its fine just go grey warden'

Shaved her head after coming out the fade to feel something

What if it’s not enough? What if it is?

I really though time travel was going to be a thing, after the dorian stuff?

Leo represent my Inky because in my AU she is too weak to travel as the mark is still sucking the life out of her, arm or no arm, but she dragged her ass up for that final scene with Solas. Leli and Josie spread a misinformation campaign around thedas, so unless you meet them directly its really hard to know if Inky is a female Elf, Male Human, and whoever else.

I hope Morrigan is ok