#this was 14 pages in word i give up editing it to make it more cohesive I TRIED

[lassieposting]

God okay so, as a movie/show fan who’s never actually read the vast extended universe of books, this meta explains so much about Sauron’s characterisation in ROP.

Like. He is absolutely riddled with red flags for someone with serious complex trauma. I picked up on it the very first time I watched the show; it’s what got me Begrudgingly Invested, even though I hate Amazon and I really wanted to hate their take on Middle Earth. But what I didn’t understand was why, because at no point in the movies or the show do we ever see Sauron involved in a situation or a dynamic that would create those red flags. But if Morgoth inflicted such a horrific punishment on him that he was either imprisoned or in no state to fight for the entire War of Wrath? Yeah, that starts to makes sense.

(Long and rambling dissection of the trauma markers and how they could relate back to this meta under the cut)

Doormat Tendencies

This is a recurring theme throughout the season: Sauron is an immensely powerful divine being – arguably the most powerful divine being outside of Valinor – but he consistently defers to Galadriel on basically everything, even to the point of giving up on his own plans, and he does it with very little fuss.

1x02: He asks her for a heading for the raft, even though he’ll later claim that he had his own plans.

1x03 – 1x06: He wants to stay in Númenor. She wants him to return to Middle Earth. He returns to Middle Earth.

1x03 – 1x06: He just wants to find work as a smith. She wants him to claim the crown of the Southlands. He ends up taking the crown.

1x08: He wants redemption. She tells him it’s too late, he’s already an irredeemable monster. He believes her, and becomes an irredeemable monster, rather than continuing to try for redemption on his own.

Now, I’ve seen a few different takes on why he acts like this – manipulation, fondness, boredom – but to me, the implication here is that this is someone who is used to being dominated and having his wants trampled over by a stronger, more forceful personality: Melkor.

“It would seem I am not the only elf alive who has been transformed by darkness. Perhaps your search for Morgoth’s successor should have ended in your own mirror.” – Adar, 1x08

It seems that, at least in the ROP universe, Galadriel and Melkor have similar personalities. Specifically, they��re both driven, stubborn, mercurial, tempestuous, fiercely independent, highly ambitious, and assertive to the point of…well, bulldozing people to get their own way or achieve their own goals. This is a personality type Sauron has always been drawn to and gelled well with – Halbrand more or less becomes Galadriel’s devoted sidekick throughout the season, just as Sauron was Morgoth’s. He’s someone who is drawn to impose order on chaos, and that means he’s drawn to chaotic people.     

And so, with Galadriel, Sauron quickly falls back into comfortable, familiar patterns of behaviour, because to his fucked-up Normal Meter, they actually read as safe – this is a dynamic he understands. He’s learned, over many long millennia with Melkor, that it’s better to adapt around chaotic behaviour and erratic demands than to try and push back against them. And we can see echoes of this even thousands of years after Melkor is defeated: the few times Halbrand does challenge her plans for him, Galadriel talks over him or brushes him off, and he lets her. It’s a token resistance – he wants to show he’s not a complete pushover, but he doesn’t actually expect her to care what he wants, or to factor his wishes into her longterm plans.

Halbrand: “As a matter of fact, my intention was –”

Galadriel, interrupting: “My companion is simply feeling the weight of his task. Come time, I am sure he will do his part.” – 1x05

Basically, S1!Galadriel is benefitting from the fact that Melkor has spent thousands upon thousands of years conditioning Sauron to do as he’s told. And how do you teach someone as stubborn and headstrong as Sauron to do as he's told? Well, if you're Morgoth - prideful, cruel, impatient, increasingly twisted and insane - probably with violence. Which brings me to -

2) Fighting Style

For this, I’m gonna focus on that one scene with the Númenorean smiths.

This scene has me absolutely vibrating because for all that it serves to showcase how much damage “Halbrand” can do, it’s actually not wanton violence. He tries to deescalate this situation three times once he realises he’s been caught out – first with humour, then with a warning, and then by trying to physically leave.

We know they’ve already triggered his temper – we see his homicidal thousand yard stare when they’re mocking his apparent relationship with Galadriel. And while the smiths are under the impression they’re picking on a Man, Sauron is obviously well aware that they’re starting shit with a Maia, and that he can take the lot of them. But even knowing he’d win the fight, he doesn’t throw the first punch. He’s willing – he wants – to walk away.

And if he’s genuinely repentant here, that tracks. He’s sick of all the violence. He doesn’t want to fight anymore. But his line, “Please don’t do this,” is not please don’t hurt me. It’s please don’t make me hurt you.

And the second he realises they're not going to let him go? The second they start beating on him? He erupts like Orodruin. He goes feral.

Like…look at the fighting style here. It’s vicious, absolutely, but first and foremost it’s highly effective self-defence. He targets vulnerable, immediately disabling spots; eyes, noses, windpipes, knee joints. He relies on speed and agility to dodge blows and give himself space to manoeuvre. He doesn’t get caught up in focusing on one opponent; he’s tracking all their movements around him and prioritising targets accordingly. He takes each of them out of the fight as quickly as possible, and once an opponent is downed, he drops them and moves on to the next one. The only time we see him linger over hurting someone, letting himself take a moment to gloat or savour it, is right at the very end, with Call me Halbrand, once all his opponents are already on the floor.

The energy in this scene is weird. The first time you watch it, it makes sense for it to be so visceral, because Halbrand would be in major danger here - he's seriously outnumbered. But rewatching it, knowing that he’s Sauron, there’s no subtle sign that this is actually an immensely powerful low-level deity toying with a few unwary Mannish thugs. It still feels like he’s fighting for his life. And the feeling that gave me was that...well, part of him thinks that he is. I think that being cornered, and smacked around, and laughed at while he’s sprawled out on the floor, actually triggered him.

In other words, he fights like someone who’s used to getting cornered into fighting either a group* or an opponent who’s bigger and stronger than he is. Sauron is, apparently, accustomed to fights where his best chance of surviving – or, at least, coming out with minimum injuries – is to down his opponent as quickly as possible and scarper before they get back up again.

*(Which, let’s face it. Morgoth’s mines were full of enslaved POWs who hated his guts and would’ve hated Sauron’s too. If he found himself chained up down there with them – a very obvious indicator that he’s lost Morgoth’s favour – the chances that those prisoners would band together to try and lynch him are, let’s face it, very high. And while there would undoubtedly be orcs on guard to keep the prisoners in line, Sauron hasn’t exactly been a good boss to them, and there are probably plenty who’d turn a blind eye unless explicitly ordered to break it up by a superior.)

Now obviously, Sauron is a Maia. He's strong, and he’s absolutely pulling his punches in the Númenor street fight – if he wasn’t, those smiths would probably be dead. Galadriel is aiming to kill when she tries to stab him, so she'd be putting a fair amount of force and weight behind that blow, and he stops her hand like it's nothing. Effortless. And he's powerful, in so many ways. There are very, very few things in Arda he would need to fear.

But he would be no match for Melkor.

As in the quote used somewhere up above:

“Though of immensely smaller native power than his Master, he remained less corrupt, cooler and more capable of calcultion.”

Melkor is bigger, stronger, tougher and more powerful than he is. Melkor is fully capable of hurting him. And if Melkor is the kind of person who’s not against using violence or humiliation to control his generals, he probably has hurt Sauron plenty in the past. 

3) Fawn Response

Most English speakers will be familiar with the term “fight or flight” – a creature’s ingrained response to a situation they perceive as stressful, dangerous or frightening. In psychology, these are called acute stress responses, and there are actually four of them, with the other two being freeze and fawn. Every living thing has an acute stress response.

Of the four responses, three are purely instinctive: honey badgers will fight a curious lion; gazelles will flee from a hunting cheetah; rabbits freeze when caught in the headlights of an approaching car. The fourth response, fawn, is unique to people and a few other highly social species.

In people, each response can manifest as a variety of different behaviours.

Fight: Verbal or physical aggression, explosive outbursts, controlling or domineering behaviour, impulsivity, bullying, picking fights for no obvious reason, teeth grinding, urge to lash out

Flight: Workaholism, overthinking, obsessive or compulsive behaviours, feelings of anxiety or panic, fidgeting, feeling trapped

Freeze: Dissociation, self-isolation, emotional numbness, depressive episodes, numbing behaviours (i.e. self-medication via substance misuse), indecisiveness

Fawn: Codependency, conflict avoidance, approval-seeking, submissive or people-pleasing personality, emotional manipulation, weak or no sense of personal identity, lying to avoid confrontation

Most trauma survivors are hybrids, and will show aspects of more than one acute stress response, and this is true of Sauron. But one of the things I find really interesting about him in ROP is that he’s predominantly a fawner.

Unlike the three instinctive responses, fawning is learned – it’s one way the complex human brain adapts to long-term threatening situations where the fight, flight and freeze responses don’t work for us. The fawn response is very common in people who’ve suffered abuse – a violent marriage, a malignant narcissist parent, severe bullying – where their best chance of survival was to placate and appease a more powerful abuser they could not escape.

E03 - When Elendil presents Halbrand & Galadriel to Tar-M��riel, we see Halbrand quietly urge Galadriel not to antagonize the Númenoreans and prompt her to show proper courtly manners by kneeling. When she immediately antagonizes the Queen, he starts showing subtle signs of agitation, and he intervenes as soon as Míriel suggests she's losing her temper with Galadriel's impudence. When Galadriel tries to interrupt him again, he does a very clear leave this to me hand gesture. He flatters the Queen to settle her ruffled feathers, and subtly diffuses the situation by addressing Pharazon when he suggests taking time to consider "their" request. He's taken a hostile confrontation between Elf royalty and Mannish royalty (Galadriel & Míriel) and turned it into a diplomatic discussion between advisors (himself & Pharazon).

And we see, several times, that this is actually Sauron’s first reaction to stress and conflict.

E08 - When Galadriel confronts Halbrand about the broken Southlands royal line, he drops the act immediately, but his first inclination is to try and reason with her. As he approaches her, his body language is open and conciliatory - the big innocent eyes, the low-calm-and-soothing voice, the slow and telegraphed movement. He's trying to make himself seem like less of a threat. When she tries to stab him, all he does is stop her - there's no counter, no move to incapacitate or harm. This interaction goes south in the end, devolving into “fight” when he invades her mind, but his first instinct is to appease. To convince.

E03 - In the same episode, we see Halbrand plying the Númenorean smiths with drink and camaraderie after they start antagonizing him, because he thinks that’s going to give him the best shot of stealing a guild crest unnoticed. While he certainly considers multiple homicide - we can see it on his face - it's actually only after they start hitting him that he flares up in return.

While he’s certainly capable of immense violence, and he does go that route sometimes, it’s usually his backup option – force is what he relies on when fawning doesn’t work.

This makes so much more sense in the context of Melkor as someone who is not only infinitely stronger and more powerful than Sauron, but who also becomes increasingly temperamental and unpredictable over time, more likely to be cruel to his own loyal followers as retaliation for their failures.

For their relationship to begin with Mairon adores Melkor and end with Sauron is afraid of Morgoth, there would have been a deterioration in their relationship, and in Morgoth’s treatment of Sauron, at some point. The fact that the relationship never devolves to the point of Sauron abandoning Morgoth of his own free will suggests that this downturn in their relationship was a slow and crumbling thing, taking place over a long period of time. That tracks: abusers often present themselves as perfectly likeable at the start of a relationship, and reveal their true colours slowly, escalating as their victim adapts to their increasingly unacceptable behaviour.

As the second-in-command of what’s essentially a dictatorship, Sauron would be right in Morgoth’s inner circle, dependent on Morgoth’s favour for his status and authority, and isolated by rank from the rest of Morgoth’s forces. He’s not Melkor’s equal, even if Melkor listens to his advice, but nor is he One Of The Men, and he outranks even high-ranking Úmaiar like Gothmog. He has no equals, no one he can lean on or share camaraderie with, nobody who can side with him against Morgoth if necessary. This power structure actually leaves him really vulnerable to abuse from above. In Valinor or Aman, if a Vala was ever cruel to their Maiar, they could at least be kept in check by other Valar. In Arda, Melkor has no oversight. There’s no one Sauron can go to if he feels mistreated. So when Melkor begins to turn on him, Sauron would quickly find that he has limited means of protecting himself thanks to his actually-quite-precarious position in Melkor’s court. He can’t fight back, because Melkor is stronger than him. He can’t flee – where would he go? They’d hunt him down, and he can’t exactly turn to Aule for protection anymore. He can’t afford to freeze and go to pieces, because the safety he does have is reliant on the benefits of his place in the hierarchy, and to keep that place he needs to be capable and competent. In this situation, his best defence is keeping Morgoth happy – attuning himself to Morgoth’s moods and learning to manipulate them, stroking his ego, currying favour, giving Morgoth as little reason as possible to be displeased with him.

And so, he becomes a fawner.

4) Treatment Of Subordinates

“For my part…I had sacrificed enough of my children for his aspirations. I split him open. I killed Sauron.” – Adar, 1x06

The main exception to Sauron’s fawning tendencies is Adar, who provokes an immediate violent response.

This makes sense – Adar’s betrayal in Forodwaith, and his brutal murder of Sauron’s last fana, was a devastating blow to Sauron’s self-confidence, and he’s out for revenge. But his treatment of Adar, and the orcs Adar considers himself responsible for, does draw attention to the way Sauron has learned – or been taught – to treat his underlings in general.

Our very first look at Sauron, before we even see him in person, is through Galadriel’s eyes during her excursion into his Forodwaith fortress. And what we see is pretty monstrous. Sauron thinks nothing of torturing, mutilating and killing the orcs who follow him – his own soldiers – if he thinks it will advance his goals. According to Adar, Sauron killed many, many orcs in the course of his experiments with the Unseen World. Adar seems to have been his second-in-command at that point, and while they may not have been friends, there was some degree of trust between them – Adar was able to take Sauron by surprise, which means Sauron was comfortable enough with him to drop his guard. And yet, it never occurs to him that Adar cares about the welfare of the orcs. It never occurs to him that Adar might take issue with the orcs being used as test subjects. It never occurs to him that eventually, given enough dead loved ones, Adar might turn on him. 

Now, we’ve established that Sauron is someone who claims he wants to be his own man, but actually tends to follow the example he’s been set by his current role model. And since this doesn’t seem like the kind of leadership he’d have learned from Aulë, it’s far more likely that his first foray into Dark Lord-ship saw him imitating Morgoth’s treatment of those who served him – placing a certain degree of trust and authority in his lieutenants, but simultaneously keeping his underlings in line through pain and humiliation. If he himself was cowed by harsh punishment, and emerged too afraid of Morgoth to have considered rebellion, why wouldn’t he assume Adar to be similarly afraid of him? Adar is, after all, an infinitely inferior being. A mutilated elf-orc against a Maia has to be a similar power differential to a Maia against a Vala: Adar should have had no hope in hell of ever taking on Sauron and winning.

Elendil’s pull in Armenelos is limited – at this point in his life, he’s just a sea captain whose family is known for causing trouble. There’s no reason for Sauron to think that Elendil would be a useful ally in the Númenorean court – he saves him purely because they’re on the same side. Quite a change, from the man who has, up to this point, thought nothing of throwing allied lives away for his own ends. Unfortunately, because the first season is so condensed, Halbrand is only the King of the Southlands for about five minutes, so we don’t get to see whether, given more time with Galadriel as his reference point, he would increasingly follow her example rather than Morgoth’s.

Later, we see him exposed to a different example. He stops working to watch Galadriel training her volunteers, leading with positive reinforcement and camaraderie. He would also have watched her interact with them on the ship during the journey to Middle Earth. She is a stubborn, demanding and unyielding commander, but she does care about her people, and she knows how to win loyalty. And what does Sauron do in their very first battle together? He saves Elendil, despite having absolutely no selfish reason to do so.

5) Dysfunctional Attachment & Sense Of Identity

Galadriel’s backstory is full of loving, positive relationships: in 1x01 we meet her brother Finrod, her friend Elrond, her long-suffering second-in-command Thondir, and (in a one-line mention by Finrod) her mother and father. In 1x07, she also mentions her long-lost husband, Celeborn. In contrast, the only relationships mentioned for Sauron are Morgoth and Adar, neither of which were positive or loving. Aulë, interestingly, isn’t mentioned at all.

One of the first things ROP establishes about Sauron as a character (once we actually meet him in person) is that hes a self-serving survivor with low empathy. He stops Galadriel climbing onto the raft while the humans bicker about whether to leave her adrift, and he doesn’t hesitate to sacrifice everyone else on the raft to cover his own escape.

The rest of the season reinforces that he is not someone who bonds easily with others:  

Galadriel then goes on to form a number of new relationships over the course of the season: her mutual antagonism with Míriel becomes mutual respect, she befriends Elendil, she briefly serves as a mentor figure for Theo, she makes an enemy of Adar. But Halbrand doesn’t. We see him interact with other characters – the Númenorean smith who gives him a job, Míriel, Bronwyn briefly – but he doesn’t build anything with them. The interactions are very surface-level, very shallow – a means to an end.

So, while Sauron is clearly a charismatic charmer, someone who knows how to present himself as likeable, there doesn’t seem to be much drive in him to actually bond with others.

But he’s not a complete sociopath, and he's not completely devoid of empathy either. We know this from the one relationship he does build in S1, which is with Galadriel.

In 1x02, both characters are quite literally adrift, and for the same reason – their lives have fallen apart. Galadriel has been betrayed by her company, let down by her closest friend, exiled back to Valinor by her king – she’s lost all the resources and allies she’s relied upon to carry out her quest for vengeance. Sauron has lost a war, his master, his allies, and his life after Adar’s betrayal. They’re both floundering, desperate for something to give back some of the stability and purpose that they’ve lost.

And up until the identity reveal, they do find it. This is a relationship characterised, above all else, by understanding of and confidence in each other. They snark and bicker and annoy each other, but they also support and guide each other, challenge each other's worldviews, and restrain one another’s worst impulses.

But they react to the loss of this relationship differently.

So really, it’s no wonder that Sauron gets attached very quickly: this is probably the most positive relationship he’s had in thousands of years. And as we’ve already established, he’s a follower by nature – he’s drawn to strong, domineering personalities who give him purpose (ordering their chaos). Galadriel is exactly what he feels he needs at that point.

Galadriel is, if not an emotionally healthy individual, at least healthier than Sauron. She has been through some shit, but she has always had the support of people who love her, and as a result, she is self-assured and confident in her place in the world. While the loss of their friendship – and of “Halbrand” - will grieve her, it won't change her fundamental understanding of who she is and what purpose she serves.

But Sauron has been rewired over millennia to be incredibly dysfunctional. He doesn't bond easily with others, but when he does, he throws himself wholeheartedly into that relationship - and only that relationship. He invests his entire identity in that other person and how they see him, what he thinks they want him to be. He makes them the centre of his universe, and adjusts his values and identity to complement theirs.

But the problem with making other people your guiding light is that once they're no longer there to direct you, you lose your way. When Morgoth is vanquished, Sauron struggles (and ultimately fails) to keep what's left of his forces together – Adar implies that while a lot of the orcs did decide to follow Sauron, a lot of them also deserted and didn't come north at all.

With Morgoth as his guiding light, he turns to evil. What may have started out as low empathy in Mairon becomes active cruelty in Sauron. Desire for order becomes obsessive need for control. Intelligence and creativity becomes lust for power and sovereignty. With Galadriel at the helm, Halbrand veers back in the other direction, with his positive traits beginning to reassert themselves - bravery, humour, charm. He shows mercy to both the Numenorean smiths (of his own accord) and Adar (as a concession to Galadriel).

He's even selfless a few times - bringing the raft back for her even though he doesn't know who she is or what value she could have to him, and then saving her from drowning even though he does know who she is and how determined she is to see him dead.

“He bid as many as he could follow him north…” – Adar, 1x06

The ones that did go with him, as we know, ultimately turned on him in favour of Adar. Without Morgoth to keep pushing him to conquer and destroy, he can't keep up the momentum, because he doesn't actually want the same things as Morgoth. He wants to rule the world, not corrupt it.

The same thing happens when Galadriel casts him out. Without her prompting him to do good things - and his own desire to live up to her image of him leading him to do good things on his own - he stops doing them altogether, because it's hard to claw your way out of being a terrible person, and it's harder still if nobody notices or cares that you're doing it. He's realised he doesn't want what Morgoth gave him, but he also doesn't really want to be the hero. He’s got no bloody idea who he really is and he's torn about what he truly wants - and an underdeveloped, fragile or non-existent sense of self is very common in people who’ve spent their entire lives being controlled by someone else.  

So, why play along with her in the first place?

"You've done far more than that for me. I'd all but given up, but you...you believed in me. You saw strength in me. You pushed me to heights that no one else could have. I will never forget that. And I'll see to it that no one else does either." – Halbrand, 1x08

On its most basic level: she's kind to him.

Victims of longterm abuse have a very skewed idea of what interpersonal relationships should look like, and what they can expect from other people. He's had his confidence badly knocked by Morgoth's mistreatment and Adar's betrayal; she gets him back in the saddle as a leader, and she does it with faith and encouragement rather than with cruelty. Of course he's a little bit obsessed with her. She's probably the first person to act as though she cares about him in millennia - it's overwhelming, it's addictive. And because she's making him feel good about himself, he's more inclined to play the part she's assigned him, because doing so is a shortcut to getting her approval, which, again, makes him feel good about himself, and so the cycle continues. Right up until it doesn't, and he loses that positive emotional feedback loop he's so eager for.

6) Rejection Sensitivity & Abandonment Issues

“You don’t know what I did before I ended up on that raft. You don’t know how I survived. How we all survived. And when these people discover it, they will cast me out. So will you.” – Halbrand, 1x05

Sauron’s fear of rejection comes up a few times throughout the first season of ROP. It’s the focus of one of his most openly vulnerable moments, when Galadriel confronts him in the forge – they’re both on the verge of tears in that scene, and when he’s staring into the fire he looks positively haunted.   

1x08’s confrontation scene then shows us that not only does Sauron fear rejection, he also reacts to it really badly. Of course, this could be because he’s an entitled manchild who throws temper tantrums when he doesn’t get his own way, but we’re looking at him from a trauma perspective, and severe rejection sensitivity is a common aspect of CPTSD. For real people, it tends to be rooted in one of two things:

You’ve been taught that you are unworthy of love. Perhaps your abuser has taught you that they are the only one who will ever care about you, and their abuse is all you will ever deserve. Perhaps they’ve told you that nobody will ever care for you at all. Perhaps you’ve been taught that your true self is pathetic, shameful or not good enough. Over time, you internalise the belief that others are inherently disappointed or disgusted by you. In later life, when you try to bond with others and they reject you, it feels like they are confirming that belief, which is devastating, and you lash out instinctively.

You were loved conditionally. Your abuser was loving and affectionate to you sometimes, but when you displeased them, they would take their love away to punish you, leaving you perpetually insecure in the stability of your most vital relationships. You end up constantly anticipating the next time your closest bonds will be yanked out from underneath you, and as a result, you never learn how to feel safe and secure in another person's love or friendship. So when you feel like someone has taken their love away, all the old feelings of panic and abandonment come rushing back, and you lash out.

For Sauron, there's a distinct vibe of #2. We see Galadriel grant Halbrand absolution for the evil he claims to have done, and we see how much that seems to affect Sauron; that's a very emotionally raw scene for him. He's spent a very long time believing himself completely beyond redemption, and then his most bitter enemy tells him (albeit unwittingly) that he can be forgiven. That she, specifically, can forgive him. And he seems to bind her specific forgiveness up with the concept of redemption in general - he doesn't believe he can do it without her support, he thinks he needs her to show him how to be good. So when Galadriel takes back that forgiveness in the raft vision, because she didn't know who she was pardoning, it doesn't seem to occur to Sauron that he could, technically, keep trying to find his way back to the light without her. In his mind, she's not just taking away some words she said when she didn't really know who she was talking to - she's taking away the very possibility of redemption altogether.

So Sauron flips his shit. He goes, "Oh, you want me to be evil? Fine. Fine! I'll show you evil."

And honestly...this kind of self-sabotage is actually really common in traumatized people with serious rejection sensitivity issues. I have rejection-sensitive dysphoria (RSD), an especially severe kind of rejection sensitivity, and RSD support communities are littered with people who have destroyed their relationships, explosively quit their jobs on the spot, dropped out of classes, cut off friendships forever...all because they felt rejected and their own brain went nuclear on them. Hell, I’ve done some of those things myself. It’s like a red mist in the moment – half the time you don’t even realise what you’ve done until you’ve calmed down, and at that point, you’ve got no choice but to walk whatever stupid path you’ve built for yourself, whether that’s “find a new job before rent is due, you moron” or “take over the world because you’ve got nothing and no one else left”.   

Anyway this got really long and disjointed because I’m pulling from so many different aspects of trauma here and it all ties in together so tightly but tl;dr, ROP!Sauron practically has CPTSD stamped on his forehead, and this meta explains why. What do you know of darkness, indeed.

(From Morgoth’s perspective, I’d imagine that starting out so much more powerful than even the greatest of his underlings would lend him a carelessness in his treatment of his servants that, for someone so proud and superior, would prove difficult to let go of even as he grew weaker over eons.

So like, while it’s true that certain forms of punishment – enslavement, torture, etc – would run the risk of alienating Sauron completely, why should Melkor care? He was, is, has always been, the greatest of the Valar. Even if Sauron does start hating him, what's a puny Maia going to do? He's not powerful enough to overthrow Melkor on his own, and while there are undoubtedly those among Morgoth's forces who think things would be better with Sauron in charge, the chances of that minority being brave and foolhardy enough to risk Morgoth's wrath by allying with him openly (or of Sauron being brave enough to call on them to do so) are very slim. Sauron won't turn to another high-ranking Úmaia with the suggestion of overthrowing Melkor together, because what if they promptly turn him in for treason? The first punishment would've instilled the fear of god Morgoth in him, so he's not going to risk another, worse one. No - alienated or no, he'll have virtually no choice but to keep his head down and just? Deal with it. Especially if Melkor keeps his punishments behind closed doors, as Sauron would have every reason to want to keep it that way - the rank-and-file gossiping about his humiliation could lose him the fear and respect of his subordinates, and that could make his life way more difficult. I can definitely see Morgoth as someone who’d stubbornly refuse to admit that, past a certain point, he’s disseminated so much of his power into corrupting Arda that he actually should be worried about alienating Sauron now, because Sauron could probably best him. I think he’d want to cling to his own image of himself as the most powerful Ainu beneath Ilúvatar – he wouldn’t want to see how far he’s fallen. And accepting that any of his underlings could threaten him would mean having to face that.)   

Sauron Unchained

Remember when Sauron mentioned "THAT first sunrise," on the raft in the Vision? (Not THE first sunrise. The sun already existed. He's talking about THAT first sunrise, after Morgoth was defeated.)

"When Morgoth was defeated, it was as if a great, clenched fist had released its grasp from my neck. And in the stillness of that first sunrise, at last! I felt the light of The One again. And I knew, if ever I was to be forgiven, then I had to heal everything that I had helped ruin" (1x08).

That sunrise was a pretty big deal.

Let's review this moment Sauron describes from The Silmarillion.

(Of the Voyage of Eärendil and the War of Wrath.)

Before the rising of the sun Eärendil slew Ancalagon the Black, the mightiest of the dragon-host, and cast him from the sky; and he fell upon the towers of Thangorodrim, and they were broken in his ruin. Then the sun rose, and the host of the Valar prevailed, and well-nigh all the dragons were destroyed; and all the pits of Morgoth were broken and unroofed, and the might of the Valar descended into the deeps of the earth. [...]

Then Morgoth was bound.

[...] Thus an end was made of the power of Angband in the North, and the evil realm was brought to naught; and out of the deep prisons a multitude of slaves came forth beyond all hope into the light of day, and they looked upon a world that was changed.

Those slaves who emerged were not the servants of Morgoth (like Orcs, Balrogs, etc.), but rather Elves, the likes of Gwindor, who were captured, imprisoned and enslaved, sent deep into the mines to dig.

But Sauron described his experience from their perspective.

Sooo... why?

"When Morgoth was defeated, it was as if a great, clenched fist had released its grasp from my neck. And in the stillness of THAT first sunrise, at last! I felt the light of The One again."

Some complain:

Why did the writers make it seem like Morgoth made Sauron evil, against his will?

-----They didn't.-----

Why did they change Sauron's character from liking Morgoth because of efficiency, to loathing him?

-----They didn't.-----

Why did they make it so Sauron only allied himself with Morgoth in order to survive?

-----They didn't.-----

They didn't change anything. They didn't even have to add anything. None of this came out of the clear blue just for fun. It's not even just for the sake of making the show.

Sauron manipulated Galadriel, but he did so with the TRUTH, making it easier for her to pity him than if he flat-out lied.

["And in the stillness of that first sunrise..."]

(Meanwhile, he talks about forgiveness.)

Galadriel: "No penance could ever erase the evil you have done."

Sauron: "That is not what you believe." [...] After our victory, you said that whatever I'd done before, I could be free of it now. [...] I told you the truth! I told you that I had done evil, and you did not care! Because you knew that our past meant nothing, weighed against our future. :D"

What is this 'trauma' he allegedly experienced? Sure, he was wary of the consequences of crossing Morgoth, but I mean ... he was the guy--Morgoth's #1--his right hand Maia--his most devoted servant. He would never do anything in disobedience or rebellion. Else how would he achieve such a status?

The implication of his tale is not that he was FORCED to Morgoth's allegiance, giving him this general fear that was finally lifted when Morgoth fell.

Something happened.

He made ONE mistake.

(And since Patrick said they're not in the business of pure Easter eggs, there's a REASON they showed this.)

In Sauron's most humiliating moment, being in the jaws of Huan, Lúthien told him "that he should be stripped of his raiment of flesh, and his ghost be sent quaking back to Morgoth; and she said: 'There everlastingly thy naked self shall endure the torment of his scorn, pierced by his eyes, unless thou yield to me the mastery of thy tower.' (The Silmarillion: Of Beren and Lúthien).

Before that, Sauron had it all. Unbeknownst to him at the time, he already had Beren (who had a price put on his head by Morgoth) IN HIS PRISON. But hearing Lúthien sing to Beren in the hour of Finrod's death, he sought great reward for bringing her to Morgoth. When his dying servant told him that Huan was there, he was like, Oh. I got this.

Things went sideways, and he had no choice but to yield to Huan, or face Morgoth's wrath... so he let them go.

As a result, Beren and Lúthien waltzed their way into Angband, stole a Silmaril and escaped.

So, um...?

Charlie referenced what Lúthien told Sauron, when speaking about the 'clenched fist' line. His paraphrasing is quite unnerving, given that he knows what backstory we are going to see next season... and I don't know... but I would like to... and it makes me wonder.

"You can go whimpering back to your master and tell him that you've let me in. You've failed. You haven’t defended your kingdom." [...] I read from that this thing that Morgoth is so powerful and so scary, that it would've meant consequences for Sauron. - Charlie Vickers

Where exactly was Sauron after his failure? He dwelt in Taur-nu-Fuin for a while, but a lot of time passed between then and the end of the War. So...WHERE DID HE GO? Wouldn't the most devoted and powerful of all the servants of Morgoth be actively involved in the defense against the host of the Valar?? One might say things were trending upward for him...

...until Finrod, Beren, Lúthien, and Huan came along.

How long would it have taken Morgoth to find out that everything was Sauron's fault? How long would it have taken to hunt Sauron down, as he fled?

Not very long, I reckon.

[...] there must have been an element to their relationship where Morgoth was someone he feared at times, or someone that would punish him when he failed. [...] there must have been some truth in [the clenched fist] line. - Charlie Vickers

No wonder he described the end of the War as if he had been among the slaves who emerged from the deep prisons..."beyond all hope into the light of day"...reminiscing the first sunrise after the overthrow of Thangorodrim, and the great, clenched fist that released its grasp from his neck as a result.

In the Great War, he wasn't just sitting in a tree, or even in a back-up tower, watching from the side-lines.

He failed Morgoth.

Miserably.

And was punished for it.

No wonder he was missing during the War of Wrath.

"What do you know of darkness?"

[fandomgirlz01]

The Most Perfect Christmas Ever

JJ Maybank X Routledge Reader

Imagine on fandom instagram?: No

Prompt or Request or Requested Prompt?: Yes: (1) "Cute Christmas socks." (2) "Are you going to stay out there in the cold all night?" (3) "Come here. I bet you can fit in my coat with me and it’ll warm you up." (4) "Is that my scarf?" (5) "Be careful you’re clumsy and it’s really slippery out here." (6) "Ah. The ground is so slippy.!” (7) "Call me elf one more time!" (8) "Chaos has come again." (9) "Christmas is doing a little something extra for someone." (10) "Come here. I bet you can fit in my coat with me and it’ll warm you up." (11) "Everything I want I can’t have." (12) "Here. Let me pick you up so you can reach the top of the Christmas tree." (13) "How long ago did (Character) fall asleep?" (14) "I believe the Abominable Snowman may be real. I think there may be something in that." (15) "I can bring you in warm, or I can bring you in cold."

Style of Writing: Single Fic 

Rating: PG ~ For all the fluff and cuteness, but a few adult comments…

Edited: Not edited so it may change around later guys. 

Word count: 6,717 

Post Date & Time: December 25th 2024 at 1:45 AM

Ko-fi

Masterlist

Warnings Here 

Listen to the story be read out loud here {coming soon}.

Summary: You, your brother John B and JJ (Jackson Jessy "Maybank" Groff) spend another Christmas together, your first Christmas without your father after he’d gone missing. This Christmas however is different than all the others that the three of you have spent together. 

Authors Note: I got these amazing prompts from a fellow writers page @bonniebird Bonnie is an inspiration to me as well as an amazing writer and artist. I did change some of them up so they fit the story better, but I did try to keep them pretty close to the original prompts. Anyway, Bonnie’s work never fails to make me smile and feel all the feelings that I should when reading. I WISH I could write as amazingly as she does, but I’m nowhere near her level yet, I hope and pray that one day I will be. Ladies and gentlemen please go give her love and support because she really deserves it. She’s one of my many inspirations and I’m so so happy to use her prompts because they really pushed me to write this fic even though I was blocked for all of my other works. I feel like it helped me break out of it, so THANK YOU Bonnie for everything 🩵🩵🩵

Also this is our first JJ Maybank fic. We have so much coming out for JJ he will eventually be added into our main people we write for so be on the look out for when we add that in. We both hope you guys enjoy this one. 🩵

You hum softly to yourself along with the Christmas music you have playing as you lay out the decorations. Every Christmas, you, John B, your dad, and JJ would enjoy Christmas together. When you were growing up and found out what JJ’s dad did to him (you didn’t tell them of course, because that’s JJ’s place to tell people about it), you begged for JJ to start spending the holidays with you. Ever since that very first time they agreed, he’s always come over. It’s always been your absolute favorite time of year. How could it not be? When you have JJ and John B around you, your two favorite people? This year is different though, because it’s the first Christmas without your father since he had disappeared only a few months ago now. 

“Hey. Wow. You’ve really got everything ready,” John B comments in shock as he looks at everything you’ve laid out so far. 

“It’s Christmas, JB, of course I’ve got everything ready. Don’t I always?” You ask, raising an eyebrow at him and shrugging. 

“I can’t believe it’s Christmas Eve and we’re only now decorating…” you shake your head and he chuckles. 

“I know normally you have it all started the last week of November,” he comments, amusement clear in his tone. 

“I know right! I’m so behind. This year has been a lot… it’s been one stressful year…” you mutter out with a roll of your eyes and he again hums in amusement as you bite your lip. 

“Hey. I get it. It definitely has been wild,” John B agrees and you sigh. 

“It’s just… it’s the first one without dad. We should still celebrate, be happy to still all be together right?” You ask, unsure of your own words. 

“Of course, bug. I’m sure we’ll enjoy it,” he tells you as he stops you for a moment to pull you into a hug. 

“Plus, I’ll have my two favorite guys with me. I’m happy and I refuse to not be happy during my favorite time of year,” you push away from the hug as you ramble while continuing to lay stuff out, not bothering to spare a look at your brother. 

“Hey. I get it. I do. No need to preach it to me, bug,” he reverently tells you, giving you a small shrug. 

You continue to lay ornaments and many other decorations out on the table. You step back to look at your handiwork, proud of how it looks. You get pulled out of your thoughts when your brother laughs, making you look at him instead. 

“What?” You ask him, eyebrow propped and he points down at your feet. 

"Cute Christmas socks," he tells you though chuckles and you look down at them, pushing up onto your toes. 

“Oh, really? Good, I got both you and JJ a pair of your own,” you inform him with a giant grin and his face falls. 

“There’s no way JJ will be wearing those…��� he tells you and you giggle. 

“Who says! They’re cute!” You cry out and he chuckles, shaking his head. 

“Sorry to tell ya, bee, JJ doesn’t do cute,” he tells you with humor lacing his tone. 

“Fine. You’ll wear them though, right?” You ask, giving him puppy dog eyes. 

“Not a chance. Puppy eyes don’t work on me anymore, bee,” he tells you and you smirk even though he’s not looking at you. 

“Really? Then why won’t you look at me, huh?” You teasingly ask and he huffs. 

“No reason. No reason at all. Speaking of your two favorite people, where's the other?” John B asks with a hint of humor, changing the subject as he picks up an ornament to look at before carefully setting it back down. 

“Actually, he was supposed to be here about thirty minutes ago…” you comment as you finally look up at the clock. 

“Don’t worry, bug. It’s JJ, I’m sure he’s just running late,” John B tries to comfort you, but you shake your head, rushing over to start putting your jacket on. 

“Exactly. It’s JJ. He’s never late this time of year. He loves having Christmas with us,” you comment as you shove your feet into your shoes. 

“Bug? What are you doing?” John B rushes over to you and you shrug as you stand while zipping up your jacket. 

“I’m going to look for him. What if he needs us?” You counter as you wrap a scarf around your neck and John B sighs. 

“I’m coming with you then,” he informs you as he grabs his own jacket. 

You give him a look of exasperation before shaking your head once more. You pull the door open before starting down the porch, but John B pulls you to a stop. You go to yell at him, but he raises his hands in surrender before pointing over at something and you turn to look where he's pointing. You see JJ sitting curled up on the dock and you sigh in relief. 

“You go talk to him. I’ll finish setting up, okay?” John B offers and you smile softly at him. 

“Don’t you wanna go over?” You ask, popping an eyebrow at him and he pauses with lips pursed in thought. 

“No. It looks more like a you and him moment,” John B answers with a small soft smile. 

“Okay. If you’re sure, birdy,” you tell him, giving a side eye to see if he changes his mind. 

When he doesn’t show any signs of changing his mind, you firmly nod at him before starting to walk over to JJ as John B heads back inside. It’s a cold night so you bring your cupped hands up to your mouth and breathe into them, hoping to warm yourself up a little. Once your hands have warmed up, you move them under your armpits, trying to keep them that way as you move closer and closer to JJ. 

“Jayj…” you call out softly and you can see your breath in the air. 

“Hi, cupcake…” he mutters, not looking at you which makes you frown. 

“Wanna tell me what’s wrong?” You ask as you sit next to him, your feet dangling over the side of the dock. 

“JJ, talk to me…” you mutter out when he doesn’t answer and you move to cuddle into his side, but he uses his shoulder to shove you off, still keeping his face out of view. 

“JJ. Seriously, what is wrong?” You ask as you grab his shoulder, trying to pull him to look at you even though you have an opinion on what’s going on. 

“Just leave me alone cupcake. Please?” He practically begs, still turned away from you and you frown even harder. 

“Jayj, please…” you whisper out to him once again and he sighs, finally turning to you not liking the hurt sound of your voice. 

“Oh, JJ…” you gasp when you see his face full of black and blue bruises, you had a thought that’s it be about his dad, but you had no clue it’d be this bad. 

“See, that’s why…” he mutters, looking away from you once more. 

“I don’t want you pitying me again… you do it far too often,” he mutters after you haven’t said anything.

“I don’t pity you, JJ. If anything I think it makes you incredibly strong…” you tell him with a firmness to your tone and he feels himself getting choked up. 

“Yeah… whatever…” he responds, not believing you as he shoves you off again. 

“I’m really sorry, JJ…” you mutter softly, not knowing what else to say to get him to believe you. You frown with a shake of your head as tears well up in your eyes.  

“What do you have to be sorry for? You didn’t do this…” JJ asks as he still refuses to look at you and you reach out for him again. 

“I’m sorry you have to go through this. I’m sorry you got dealt such a bad hand in life. I wish… I wish I could force Luke to see you. To actually see you,” you explain as you're finally able to pull him to look at you. He wishes he could wipe your frown off but only smiles softly at you. 

“It’s not so bad. I’ve got you and John B. It could be worse I guess,” he tells you with a shrug as he looks away again and out to the water. 

“I mean, you are right. Having us is pretty awesome,” you agree playfully, bouncing your eyebrows and he chuckles to himself, shaking his head. You smile, seeing his tough exterior finally starting to break down.

“It really is,” he softly agrees as he still looks out over the water and you hold back a sigh. 

“Well, are you going to stay out here in the cold all night and stew in what happened? Or are you going to come in and have fun with your favorite person?” You goad him while nudging him with your shoulder. 

“Oh, John B’s my favorite person now, huh?” he playfully asks, his own lips forming a bit bigger of a smirk now and you gasp. 

“Umm, no. I was actually talking about myself,” you respond with a deadpan look that makes him smile even more as he laughs, shaking his head. 

“What makes you think you’re my favorite person?” he asks you, all smiles now and you can’t help but smile alongside him. 

“It made you smile, didn’t it?” You answer him with a shrug and he’s shaking his head in disbelief again. 

“Yeah… yeah. It did,” he chuckles, continuing to smile softly at you.

"Well come on, then, let's get inside. We have a tree to decorate still and many other Christmas festivities,” you tell him with a beaming smile as you go to get up, but he reaches out and stops you. 

“Can we maybe just stay here for a moment more?” he mutters out and you blink at him for a moment.

“Yeah, of course, Jayj…” you softly tell him and he smiles a small smile at you. 

The two of you sit in silence for a little while before JJ, who's not wearing a coat, starts to shake a little bit."Come here. I bet you can fit in my coat with me and it’ll warm you up," You tell him as you hold your coat open to him. 

“Thanks, cupcake,” he mutters as he slides in under your arm and you smile warmly at him. 

“Of course, Jayj. It’s us against the world,” you whisper to him as you bring your pinky up and he smiles again before bringing his up as well, wrapping it around yours. 

“Us against the world, cupcake,” he agrees and you sigh, laying your head against his that now lays on your shoulder. 

“Hey, is this my scarf?” he asks after a while of silence as he lifts one of the sides of the scarf up. 

“Umm. Yeah, I think it’s the one you left here last year. I found it in my winter clothes. You can have it back if you want,” you answer with your cheeks burning hot and you try to hide your face. 

“Nah. Keep it. It’s a better fit on you than me,” he tells you softly and again you can’t help but blush. 

He says nothing else after that, just cuddles back into your shoulder and you squeeze his shoulder. The two of you stay sitting there, cuddling while looking out over the water in silence and just enjoying each other’s presence. 

“Hey, tweedledee and tweedledum, are you two going to stay out there all night and make me decorate alone? Or are you going to come be of some help?”John B calls out for the two of you from the edge of the dock and you both roll your eyes. 

“Well, you ready to go in?” You ask him and he smiles at you before nodding. 

“Yeah, let’s go,” he agrees before pulling away and the two of you start to stand. 

"Be careful cupcake, you’re clumsy and it’s really slippery out here,” JJ tells you as he stands up and you cross your arms. 

“I’m not that clumsy!” You fight back and he hums in amusement. 

“Okay. I’ll believe that when you're not tripping over thin air,” he jokes back with a smirk and you scowl at him. 

“Whatever…” you tell him as you roll your eyes before turning and taking a step to head back to the house. 

You let out a small gasp as you start to fall back, but JJ, knowing you well, was already reacting and quickly pulling you back up. You stare at him in shock for a moment before you slowly start to smile, making him smile too. 

"You were right. The ground really is so slippery,” You joke, eyes wide in shock and he playfully rolls his eyes at you. 

“Never change, cupcake. You’re truly one of a kind,” JJ tells you with a grin that’s utterly infectious. 

“Only if you promise never to change yourself, Jayj. You’re one of a kind too,” you request and he nods in agreement. 

You both stare at one another for a moment, your eyes staring into the blue pools that are his eyes that you’ve come to love so much over the years and you have a burning need to kiss him. You can feel his heart going what seems to be a mile a minute as he watches your eyes flicker down to his lips and back up to his eyes, his eyes doing the same. He squeezes your waist gently with a million thoughts of how your lips might taste flying though his mind and he wishes he could just kiss the adorable frown off your face, but he knows he can’t, making him frown too. You frown even deeper before opening your mouth to ask him why he’s frowning, but before you get the chance, you get cut off. 

“Hey! Would you two stop making eyes at each other and come help me decorate!” John B calls out again, interrupting the moment and you almost groan. 

“Thanks for catching me, Jayj,” you whisper out and something flashes through his eyes for a moment, an emotion you can’t quite decipher before he grins again letting you go. 

“I’ll always catch you, cupcake,” he promises with a light smile before the two of you start to walk over to John B. 

You slip a little bit once more, but you reach out and grab onto JJ’s arm. He looks down at you and chuckles as you cling to him like a koala bear, making him chuckle. 

“Don’t worry. I’ll get you to the end of the dock safely,” he promises with a laugh as he laces his fingers through yours and continues to walk over to John B. 

"Chaos has come again, man!” JJ announces as you and he walk into the château before he’s letting go of you to walk over to John B. 

“Don’t think that’s a good thing man,” John B deadpans and you fight to hold back a giggle as JJ pulls back from the guy hug the share looking offended. 

“Fine then, I take it back. You’re definitely not my favorite person. It’s cupcake,” JJ says as he pulls you into him from behind. 

“Oh so now I’m your favorite,” you ask, crossing your arms and giving a faux annoyed look. 

“Let’s be completely honest bee, I think you always have been even when he lies outta his butt and says you aren't,” John B comments with a roll of his eyes as he picks up an ornament and hangs it on the tree. 

“It’s disgusting sometimes really,” John B continues with a fake gag as he hangs the ornament up on the tree. 

“Ohh. I wanna do the Angel!” You happily call out clapping your hands and John B chuckles. 

“Don’t you always do it? This year’s no different, Bee. It’s your one job,” John B comments in amusement making you pout. 

“It’s not my only job! I have others,” you fight back and JJ chuckles, slinging his arm around your shoulder. 

“Yeah, JB her other jobs lookin pretty,” JJ comments as he hugs you into his side and you fight a blush as you groan pushing him away. 

“I extremely dislike both of you,” you comment, crossing your arms with a look of dismay falling on your face and they both grin. 

“That’s not true. You LOVE us,” both of them singsong to you and you uncross your arms shaking your head. 

“Okay maybe I do, but let’s get this show on the road,” you finally cave and agree with them before walking over to start decorating the tree some more. 

“Okay miss head elf,” JJ jokes with a roll of his eyes and John B laughs. 

“Oh that’s a good one Jayj. She really is a snappy head elf this time of year isn’t she?” John B agrees before pushing the joke a little further and you pause crossing your arms. 

"Call me elf one more time!" You seeth out through clenched teeth and they share a look. 

“Awe come on elffie. It’s a cute Christmas nickname that’s all. Plus you're the perfect height for it,” JJ tells you again, wrapping an arm around your shoulder as he squeezes you affectionately and you huff, shaking your head. 

“Yeah, yeah. Come on, let’s get decorating already…” you tell them in annoyance and JJ snickers along with John B. 

Together you, JJ and John B all dance around and decorate making you completely forget about everything that’s been going on the past few months. For a moment it’s just you and your two favorite people living happily with nothing and nobody to take it away from you. You’d give anything to live every single day like this. You walk away still laughing at something JJ had said and walk back in with the scissors. You stop and fondly watch as John B and JJ fight over who gets to put an ornament on a certain branch. Blue Christmas by Elvis starts to play and without realizing it you start to cry. 

“You okay there cupcake?” JJ asks as he turns around to see you crying and worry flows through him. 

“I’m okay Jayj…” you tell him softly with a gentle smile on your face as you set the scissors on the table. 

“Then why the tears?” John B asks and you giggle wiping at your eyes. 

“I just wish we could all live like this everyday. Just us three having the times of our lives with nothing to worry about,” you start pausing to catch your breath a little bit and to sniffle. 

“Both Kie and Pope have their parents. I’m happy to just have you two,” you explain more tears welling up in your eyes and JJ clicks his tongue coming over to give you a hug. 

“I’m happy we have each other too, Bee, but unfortunately we can’t have it everyday. There’s always going to be good and bad days,” John B agrees with you as he to comes over to hug you. 

“I know, I just wish it could be that way,” you sigh out and JJ squeezes you once more. 

“I think we all do, cupcake. Let’s just try to live in this moment then yeah? Enjoy the time we have?” He asks and you grin up at him. 

“Yeah, okay,” you agree and he smiles happy to see you back to your happy go lucky self. 

You gasp as the song’s lyrics perfectly fit the moment. “But I’ll have a blue, blue, blue, blue Christmas without you,” you sing along to Elvis as you sway and JJ shakes his head, but smiles as he watches you enjoy the music. 

“Perfect timing, much?” He jokes propping an eyebrow making both you and John B burst out laughing. 

“Yeah… definitely don’t quit your day job bug,” John B jokes and you shrug seemingly unfazed by his playful insult. 

“And what day job would that be birdy? Hunting for gold?” You playfully ask back, sticking your tongue out at him. 

“Okay. Okay… you win,” he chuckles, holding his hands up in surrender. 

“I always win,” you say in a devious tone with an equally devious look. 

“Don’t I always win, Jay?” You ask, turning to JJ who looks between you and John B in a panic for a moment. 

“Sorry JB. I have to say she is definitely a winner in my book,” JJ tells both of you and you let out a cheer pumping your fist in the air. 

“Eat it birdy!” You cheer out as you do a little dance. 

“So not fair! JJ’s only on your side because he’s crushing hard. Let’s bring Sarah in as a tie breaker,” John B complains and you pause your dance crossing your arms as you prop an eyebrow at him. 

“How would that break the tie? One. Sarah, so would choose me too and second that’d only make it tied even more even if she did choose you,” you comment very pointedly and he shrugs sticking his tongue out. 

“At least it’d be more fair. Again, JJ only chose you because he’s crushing on you,” John B again points out and you shake your head. 

“And Sarah is so crushing on you,” you point out and JJ lets out an “ooooohhh” making you laugh. 

“She got you there JB,” JJ comments with a smirk that’s infectiously making you smirk too. 

“Okay birdy, you win. I take it as a compliment that my favorite person is crushing on me though,” you happily reply, leaving a kiss on JJ’s cheek and he blushes before awkwardly clearing his throat. 

“Okay. Okay. Enough fighting you two. I think it’s time to put the angel up right?” JJ cuts in only wanting to change the whole subject as he holds the Angel up for you to take from him. 

“Yeah, okay.” You agree as you take the Angel from him. 

You look down at the Angel in your hands, the angel you and your mom had picked out together when you were five. You don’t remember much of her, John B does because he’d been a little older (he’d been seven) when she left, but that doesn’t mean it doesn’t still hurt when you think about how she’d just left the three of you behind. John B and your dad had told you so much about her that sometimes she felt like a phantom to you, like someone that was there for a second, someone you knew so well, then gone the very next. Tears well up in your eyes and you look up at John B. He immediately knows what you’re thinking and lets out a sigh, sad for you as always, he always felt sad you couldn’t fully remember her like he could. 

“I know, bug. I miss mom too,” John B sympathizes with you and you wipe under your eyes as JJ squeezes your shoulder. 

“I just wish I’d gotten to actually know her a little more,” you mutter and JJ pulls you into a hug knowing that’s the only sure way to comfort you. 

“Here, cupcake. Let me pick you up so you can reach the top of the Christmas tree.” JJ tells you after pulling away from the hug and he bends down before slipping his head between your legs lifting you as he stands. 

“You better not drop me Jayj!” You squeak out before giggling hysterically as you’re now sitting on his shoulders one hand in his hair the other holding the angel and he stands straight. 

“I would NEVER dream of it cupcake,” he sweetly tells you as he holds you a little tighter to make it known he definitely won’t drop you. 

You grin as you put the Angel on the tree before looking down to see JJ looking up at you. You then nod at him and he bends to let you down slowly. Once you have both feet on the ground he stands up straight next to you. You smile at him before suddenly you're letting out a gasp pushing JJ away just the slightest but in your excitement. 

“What? What’s wrong?” JJ asks immediate worry, taking over as he looks at John B for help, but John B just shrugs just as confused. 

“It’s If Everyday Was Like Christmas my favorite Elvis Christmas song,” you happily explain and JJ lets out a sigh of relief shaking his head. 

“We should have known,” John B playfully rolls his eyes 

“Oh we really should have dude. She is an old soul,” JJ agrees and he chuckles as you start to sway again just as you had with Blue Christmas and JJ shakes his head again too as you hold a hand out for him. 

“What?” JJ asks with an arched eyebrow and you grin making his heart melt at seeing you so happy. 

"I want to dance with you. Come on. Dance with me Jayj,” you beg, holding your hand out to him more insistently. 

“Okay, but you should know I’m not a good slow dancer sweetheart,” he informs you as he takes your hand in his and you smile as you help him get into position. 

“It’s okay J. Just sway with me. We don’t have to be all that fancy, we’re Pogues, remember? Not kooks,” you remind and he throws his head back laughing before calming as he sways with you. 

“P4L. Never a kook,” JJ happily agrees, proud that you feel the same way he does. 

You lay your head on his shoulder, closing your eyes and his leans against yours. He looks at John B for a moment over your shoulder who seems to be watching the two of you fondly. John B then surprises him by putting his hands up in surrender before leaving the room and JJ melts against you a little more. 

When If Everyday Was Like Christmas ends both of you slowly come to a stop and you lift your head from his shoulder to look at him. You smile softly at him and again there’s a moment where you lock eyes. His bright brilliant blue eyes shining with happiness and another emotion that makes you think you might just kiss, but just like all the other moments over the years where you’d been close John B walks back into the room. 

“And what’s going on here?” John B asks ever the overprotective brother that he is and you roll your eyes. 

“Nothing birdy. Are we watching die hard or not?” You ask changing the subject as you push away from JJ and he fights not to frown at the missing feeling of your body heat. 

��Not. I thought we could open a gift or two,” John B tells you and you arch an eyebrow at him. 

“I thought we all agreed on no gifts this year?” You ask and John B shrugs. 

"I’d be down. I know we said no presents this year but I wanted to get you both something special to show you how much I appreciate you, so I uhh did…" JJ admits with a shrug in agreement and John B grins shrugging along with JJ. 

“My gifts really aren't much. Just one to open tonight and tomorrow for each of us. All have super special meaning that’s all,” John B informs you and you grin shaking your head. 

“Well I really can’t say much. I did the same thing,” you admit with a giggle when they both give you a shocked look. 

“Bee! It was your idea!” John B cries out and you smile sheepishly. 

“Oppps,” you shrug feigning innocence, shrugging "Christmas is doing a little something extra for someone else right?” You ask with a lopsided grin and John B lets out a chortle shaking his head almost in disbelief. 

“I mean she’s not wrong dude,” JJ happily chirps out and you smirk, bouncing your eyebrows. 

“I’m never wrong Jayj,” you joke with him poking his side and he playfully scoffs. 

“Okay. Yeah, whatever you want to believe cupcake,” he humors you as he rubs at the spot you’d poked him in. 

After opening gifts you’d all decided to watch the movie so you cuddle up next to JJ and John B decides to sit in the chair off to the side. As the movie plays JJ lays behind you his strong arm wrapped around your waist like normal and anytime he laughs you feel the warm air from his mouth over your neck making goosebumps rise on your arms. You fight the whole movie not to fall even more in love with him and the way he holds you, but just like any other time the two of you cuddle you do. 

“Well, I’m beat. I’m going to bed,” John B announces as he slaps his hands down on the arms of the chair and pushes himself up. 

“Goodnight JB,” you call out as he walks toward his room and he turns around. 

“Goodnight bumblebee. Sleep tight,” he replies with a soft smile your way. 

“So cupcake, you heading to bed too?” JJ asks and you look up at him. 

“I’m not really tired. I might go lay in the hammock for a little while,” you inform him and he nods letting go of your waist. 

“You could come join me if you want, but you definitely don’t have to,” you tell him biting at your lip, nervous he might say no and he chuckles. 

“And skip out on our special hammock time?” He asks like he is offended and he smiles when you perk up. 

“Really?” You ask in excitement and he smiles even more. 

“Really cupcake. I love our hammock time. Let’s go,” he promises softly as he pushes up off the couch and grabs the blanket the two of you always use. 

He then turns to you and looks down at you sitting up before reaching a hand out to you. You smile almost shyly as you slip your hand into his and he pulls you up from the couch. He wraps his arm around your shoulders and together you walk out of the château. You both walk down the stairs and over to the hammocks. 

“After you princess,” JJ tells you as he bows like a butler would and you giggle shaking your head. 

“Why thank you. You're a very kind Prince, you know that?” You ask him as he lays down with you now and he holds his arm up for you to cuddle up to his side. 

“Well it’s easy to be kind to a princess like you,” he tells you and you roll your eyes at his flirty ness as he uses his other hand to put the blanket over the two of you. 

You giggle as he struggles to lay the blanket out evenly over the two of you and you reach out to grab the other side, pulling it over yourself. He chuckles softly, shaking his head before finally relaxing and he squeezes you softly as the two of you look up to watch the very prominent stars in the sky. 

“Can I tell you a secret cupcake?” He whispers out to you after a few minutes as he uses his fingers to rub your arm. 

“Of course Jayj… you can tell me anything. You know that,” you promise as you cuddle into his side even more. 

"I believe the Abominable Snowman may be real... I think there may be something in that." He whispers and you slowly grin, turning to smile up at him. 

“You might actually be right… I mean who’s to say he’s not real?” You ask and he chuckles, shaking his head loving the fact that you just agree with him. 

“I think I may have everything I want right here right now,” you whisper out as you cuddle back down into him with a hum of contentment. 

"Everything I want I can’t have." He admits and you frown pushing up to look at him again. 

“What do you mean? You don’t have everything you want? What else could you want?” You ask with a frown, sad that he could possibly not be as happy as you thought he was. 

He takes a deep breath, closing his eyes for a moment before letting them open once more. His blue eyes stare into yours and you almost lose yourself in them. 

“You,” he whispers almost nervously and you’ve never seen JJ at his nervous before as you raise an eyebrow at him. 

“Jayj. You have me. I’m not sure why you think you don’t,” you tell him in confusion and he huffs in anger, but not in anger at you, no he’d never be angry at you, but he is angry you're not getting it. 

“No princess. You don’t get it… I want us to be… uggh,” he groans out reaching up to rub at his chest and your eyebrow furrows even more as you reach up moving his hand before rubbing his chest for him. 

“Jay. Just calm down and tell me. It’s okay… you want us to be…” you prompt him to continue on as he seems to calm a little more. 

“Okay… uhh… I want us to be more than friends and I know Pogues don’t Mack on Pogues, but I’ve wanted to be so much more with you for years…” he admits hesitation clear as he once again for the second time in the night refuses to look at you and you smile. 

“Jayj… look at me please…” you whisper out and hit takes him a moment, but soon he’s doing it. 

"It was always you, through everything it was always you Jayj. Nobody else,” you whisper again with a grin growing on your face as you watch him slowly realize exactly what you’d said. 

“Wait… really? But wait… what?” He asks in confusion and you giggle. 

"I'd always choose you Jayj.” You softly promise and nuzzle into his chest bashfully and he chuckles bringing his hand up to your head to massage at your scalp. 

“I’d always choose you too Princess,” JJ promises just as softly as he leaves a kiss to your forehead. 

“You missed…” you tell him with a confident grin as you sit up to look at him and he chuckles again shaking his head. 

“Oh my bad. Let’s see if I can fix my mistake then,” he jokes right back with his own smile growing. 

Before you know it his hand trails from your hair and to your neck, lightly pulling you to him while tilting your head ever so slightly. He moves slowly and treats you so gently making the butterflies erupt even more in your stomach. There’s a thick anticipation that falls over you with how slowly you move closer together, but it’s the kind of anticipation you really don’t want to end. Finally his lips meet yours in a firm yet delicate and maybe a little desperate kiss. You are a little surprised thinking it would have been a little more heated with knowing how JJ is, but the delicacy of which he kisses you proves to you just how much he’s wanted this. 

He worries if he makes it anymore heated like he normally does with other girls he’d ruin this whole moment and he really doesn’t want to lose you. You're the most important girl outta all the ones he’s ever been with so if he messes it up he’s scared he might lose you all together. You take a leap and kiss him a little harder, surprising him for the smallest of moments, but he smirks into the kiss before reciprocating it even more. You smile into the now heated kiss as you reach up and wrap your arms around his neck and play with the hair at the nip of his neck making him groan. You then maneuver a little more so now instead of laying side by side you lay on top of him and he squeezes your waist after his hands move from your neck. 

Slowly you pull away breaking the kiss almost unwillingly and he chases your lips giving them another peck making you giggle. He then leans his forehead against yours and you grin wide as both of your heavy breaths mingle together. 

“Wow…” you whisper, biting your lip and he grins at you. 

“Definitely wow. I’ve wanted to do that for a very long time,” he admits and you grin as you use your thumb to trace his lips. 

“I know it may be early, but I love you Jayj. You’re my favorite Christmas gift,” you tell him as you scoot down and lay your head on his chest. 

“It’s not early at all, princess. I think we’ve loved each other for a while now. We’ve just been too scared to tell each other,” he tells you as he kisses your head and pulls you even closer then before. 

“Oh and you're my favorite gift too sweet girl. I love you,” JJ adds on and you sigh happily. 

“Merry Christmas Jayj…” you mutter out as tiredness takes over your body. 

“Merry Christmas cupcake,” JJ parrots you again, squeezing you a little closer. 

It’s a little while later and JJ smiles when he realizes you’re breathing has evened out meaning you’re happily asleep in his arms. He yawns, but refuses to fall asleep quite yet, just wanting to enjoy having what he thought he never could. 

"How long ago did, bug fall asleep?" He hears a whisper making him look up at John B. 

“Only a little while ago. She’ll probably sleep in a lot more than the last few years. I thought you went to bed?” JJ whispers not wanting to wake you as you sleep soundly on his chest. 

“I did, but I knew you two would come out here and I wanted to check up on the two of you to make sure you're all good before I actually fall asleep,” John B whispers back and JJ smiles a thankful smile at him. 

“Thanks man. We’re good,” JJ tells him and John B nods pausing to watch your sleeping face. 

“You take care of her, you hear me JJ. You break her and best friends or not I will break you,” John B says in a serious whisper and JJ’s eyes widen for a moment. 

“Don’t worry dude. I don’t plan to and if it ever does happen I’d break myself before you even hit the chance,” JJ whispers honestly and John B smiles at his best friend. 

“I know, but now that the two of you got wise and got together I still need to make it known. I’m her big brother first and foremost,” John B informs him with a shrug and a happy smile at seeing his sister happy as well as safe and sound in his best friend's arms. 

“Goodnight JJ. Sleep well buddy,” John B tells him before turning and starting back to the château. 

“Night man. You sleep well too,” JJ tells him in a happy whisper as he nuzzled into your hair. 

John B knows without a doubt that JJ is good for his little sister and you are for JJ too. He’s so happy the two of you have finally confessed and made it official. He’s had to watch the two of you pine for one another for years and it was painful sometimes because he cares for both of you so much. First and foremost though as he’d told JJ you are and will always be his first thought. It’s just a big brother thing to protect his little sister. 

JJ watches until John B makes it into the château before deciding to hold you close for a little while longer. Before he knows it though your soft, even breathing lulls him into his own slumber and his eyes close, but even in his sleep he holds you close never ever wanting this Christmas to end; the most perfect Christmas ever for the both of you. 

The End…

If your user has a strike though and bolded it means we were unable to tag you and we are terribly sorry, maybe check in the list that it is right. 

For Future Fics please add yourselves to our taglists if you wish to be tagged in anything upcoming. Thank You! We hope you guys enjoyed!

Tag List: Add Yourself Here

[kingofbodyrolls]

Friendcation (m) | myg | three

When you and Yoongi visit his family in Daegu, and he introduces you as his friend, it rubs you all kind of wrong. But what are you even to each other, other than best friends with benefits?

→ Pairing: Yoongi x reader (female) → Other characters: Jimin, Jungkook, Taehyung, Namjoon, Hoseok and Seokjin. → Genre/AU: best friends to friends with benefits to lovers, non idol!au, camping!au, roadtrip!au, mechanic!Yoongi, humor, slight angst, smut and fluff → Rating: mature/explicit/R18 (This is mature/explicit content, so minors, please do not interact.) → Disclaimer: I do not own BTS or know them personally and this work of fiction is purely fictional and for entertainment purposes only. The actions and personalities described in the story do not reflect those of BTS— it’s just fiction. Also, if you would kindly read the tags/warnings before reading, that would be lovely: and if you don’t like whatever is described in the tags, just hit return and find something else to read. Thank you 🌸 → Status: completed! → Word Count: 11,9K → Warnings: slight angst, ‘friendzoned’, smut; protected penetration, fingering, nipple and breast play, handjob, dirty talk. Yoongi’s sister also deserves a warning 🫢 → Author’s note: We’re halfway there 🎉 I actually wanted to put more stuff into this chapter, but I’m striving for 10-12K word each chapter, so I had to leave some things out and put it in the next chapter, because the smut scene got too long 🫢 I hope you won’t mind, and I promise there will be more smut coming 😇 + I'm currently editing chapter 4 and going to write ch 5+6 as soon as I can! I'm currently going to be moving (we bought our first house wuhu!), so I'll be moving the next 14 days I think. So I don't know how much writing I'll get done, but I hope to get some time here and there. Also - what are you thinking about JK's 3D????? → Read on AO3? [link] ✨

← previous | s.masterlist | m.masterlist |  next →

Saying goodbye to Jimin, Jungkook, and Taehyung was like ripping a piece of your heart out, but the promise of a reunion after your vacation kept your spirits high. 

Now, as you drive with Yoongi to a campsite on the outskirts of Daegu, your excitement bubbles up. The campsite seems like a hidden gem with its inviting lake, and the surrounding lush greenery. 

You can hardly wait to explore this tranquil haven and create new memories with Yoongi.

As the midday sun bathes the campsite in a warm glow, you and Yoongi decide to make your way to the nearby lake. The tranquil waters beckon, promising a peaceful escape from the world. 

You set up your stools by the shore, ready to indulge in some quality relaxation. While you lose yourself in the pages of your book, Yoongi immerses himself in his music, creating a harmonious blend of serenity and melody. 

The hours slip away like gentle waves, leaving you feeling connected to nature and each other in this idyllic setting. As your stomach playfully rumbles, a symphony of hunger, Yoongi gallantly offers to take charge of dinner. 

With a charming smile, he heads back to Holly to kindle a campfire and whip up a delightful meal. The crackling flames and the aroma of cooking food fill the air, creating an enticing atmosphere. 

You, however, are completely engrossed in your book, the words transporting you to another world, oblivious to the tantalizing scents and sounds of Yoongi’s culinary adventure.

Each bite of Yoongi’s mouthwatering meal is a taste of perfection, a savory delight that lingers on your taste buds. You savor every mouthful, fully aware that you’ll miss these delectable moments once your vacation comes to an end. 

As the two of you dine, conversation flows naturally, going from plans in Daegu to the exciting prospect of meeting Yoongi’s family. The anticipation of meeting his family excites you, but also gives you some anxiety, but overall you eagerly look forward to the connection you’ll make with them and you’re sure they are very nice people.

Under the moonlit sky, you find yourself nestled in Yoongi’s warm embrace once more. 

His arms wrap around you protectively, creating an intimate cocoon where the world outside fades into insignificance. The sensation of his breath against your neck, his heart beating in sync with yours, makes this moment feel like an enchanting dream. 

Your heart flutters with each whispered word of affection, and as sleep starts to claim you both, you can’t help but smile, knowing that these tender nights will be cherished memories to hold onto.

The first light of dawn bathes Holly in a soft, gentle glow, revealing Yoongi’s peaceful expression as he stirs awake. 

But what truly captures his attention is the unmistakable hardness pressing against him, demanding attention and relief. 

It’s the hardest he has ever been in the morning. 

He can’t help but chuckle at the idea that your subconscious moans have left such a powerful effect on him. Gently, he tries to shift and extricate himself without waking you, although the bulge in his boxers isn’t making it easy. 

As he carefully moves, he can’t help but wonder how you might react if you were to wake up and discover the delightful predicament you’ve caused him. 

He decides to settle back into your embrace.

Yoongi’s fingers dance softly across your face, tracing the contours of your features as you gradually rouse from your slumber. His touch is as delicate as a whispered promise, making your sleepy senses come alive. 

You’re met with the sensation of his warm breath, brushing against your nape like a secret he’s sharing only with you. As your eyes flutter open, the first thing you see is the affectionate glint in his gaze. It’s a look that tells you he’s been awake for a while, lost in the quiet moments of the morning, his thoughts consumed by you. 

Your heart skips a beat, and you can’t help but offer him a soft sleepy smile in return.

You let out a contented hum as you snuggle further into his embrace, feeling the unmistakable evidence of his desire pressing against your backside. A mischievous grin curls onto your lips, and you can’t resist the urge to tease him gently. 

“Someone is certainly eager this morning,” you playfully murmur, your voice laced with a hint of amusement. Your laughter dances through the air like a sweet melody, intertwining with the warmth of the morning sun.

His warm breath tickles your ear as he continues to nuzzle you, and you feel his dick pressing more firmly against you, “You’re so damn irresistible, and your sleep moaning is such a turn on.”

His words, whispered with a hint of desire, send a thrilling shiver down your spine. You can’t help but let out a sultry chuckle in response. “Well, I guess I can’t control what I do in my sleep,” you tease, your voice dripping with playful seduction. 

The intimate atmosphere between you two grows more charged with each passing moment, and you can feel the anticipation building in the air.

“I want you, babe,” his seductive whisper in your ear ignites a fiery desire within you, and you find it increasingly difficult to control your own desires. You shift beneath his touch, your body responding eagerly to his proximity, and the rush of arousal intensifies, making your senses tingle with anticipation.

“I want you too Yoongi.” 

You reply in a breathy, lustful tone, unable to resist the temptation that he presents. As you confess your desire, you can see the hunger in his eyes intensify. You turn to face him fully, your lips hovering just a breath away from his. 

With a playful smile, you close the gap between you, pressing your mouth against his in a teasing, tantalizing kiss. His lips are soft and plush, and the electric sensation that courses through your body is undeniable. 

His hands start to explore your body, tracing the curves and contours with a gentle yet fervent touch, as your kiss deepens, growing more passionate with each passing moment.

With a primal growl, Yoongi shifts his position, rising up on his hands and knees, his body poised above yours. 

His dark, blown-out pupils are a testament to the intense desire that courses through him, like a tempestuous storm ready to consume everything in its path. You can feel the raw power radiating from him, and it sends shivers of anticipation down your spine. 

His every movement is deliberate and calculated, his gaze locked onto yours with an unwavering intensity. In this moment, you are captivated by the sheer magnetism of his presence, and the air crackles with an electrifying tension.

“You’re so hot,” as your fingers thread through his soft long hair, you pull his irresistibly handsome face down towards yours, the urgency of your desire evident in your touch. 

Your lips meet in a searing kiss, a passionate collision of pent-up emotions and longing. The heat between you intensifies, and your tongues engage in a tantalizing dance, their movements mirroring the unspoken desires that have simmered beneath the surface for far too long.

Each kiss is a revelation, a testament to the magnetic pull you share, igniting a fire that burns hotter with every passing second. Every brush of his lips against yours sends sparks of electricity coursing through your veins, and you can’t help but moan into this mouth, your body arching towards his in a silent plea for more.

The exquisite friction between your clothed core and this throbbing dick sends shockwaves of desire through your body. 

Your arousal has reached a fever pitch, and the anticipation is driving you to the brink of madness. With every tantalizing brush of his hard cock against your wetness, your craving for him intensifies to the point where you feel like you might lose all control. 

Each moment feels like an eternity as you yearn for him to be inside you, to fill the aching void that only he can satisfy. The tension in the air crackles with unrestrained lust, and you can hardly contain the feral need building within you. 

Your body, slick and eager, practically begs for his touch.

Your fingers glide sensually across his pectorals, reveling in his contours of his well-defined chest. The contrast between the hard planes of his chest and the inviting softness of his tummy is a tantalizing paradox, a testament to his rugged yet gentle allure. His physique, sculpted by his profession, holds an alluring mix of strength and vulnerability, and you find yourself drawn to the balance of power and tenderness that he embodies.

As your fingertips explore every inch of his skin, you savor the texture of his body, delighting in the warmth and smoothness of his flesh. 

With a passionate kiss that leaves you both breathless, you convey your burning desire. Breaking the kiss, you lock eyes with him, your voice dripping with irresistible temptation. 

“If you don’t fuck me soon,” you purr, batting your eyelashes teasingly at him, “I don’t know what I’m gonna do.”

Your words hang in the air like a sultry promise, igniting a fierce hunger in his eyes. 

“Patience, babe,” he chuckles, his fingers leaving a fiery trail down your body, tracing the contours of your curves beneath his oversized shirt and your snug shorts you’re wearing.

His touch is a delicate torment, making your skin and your breath hitch. Each caress ignites a new wave of longing within you, intensifying your craving for him.

“I don’t get how you’re this patient,” you tease, your voice dripping with desire. “I’ve never seen a dick that incredibly hard before. It seems really painful. Don’t you want release?” as you speak, you seductively buck your hips, grinding your crotch against his, eliciting a deep, guttural moan from his.

“It’s not that bad,” he shrugs casually, his eyes locked on your body. 

He tugs at your shirt, grabbing the edges and pulling it over your head in one smooth motion. As he unveils your soft breasts, he licks his lips in pleasure, his gaze fixed on the sight before him. Without hesitation, he reaches out, his fingers lightly caressing the sides of your breasts.

“Damn, you’re so pretty,” he breathes, a hint of awe in his voice as he gives them a gentle squeeze. His desire is evident as he continues, “I didn’t get to appreciate these beautiful tits yesterday.” 

With those words, he lowers his head to one of your breasts, closing his mouth around a nipple that he sucks with a tantalizing rhythm, coaxing it to alertness. His actions send shivers down your spine, and your body quivers in response to his skillful touch.

Your moan escapes your lips in a breathy, wanton melody as he continues his relentless assault on your sensitive breasts. His skilled mouth lavishes attention on one nipple while his hand works its magic on the other, pulling and pinching the now hard bud. 

Each sensation sources through you like an electric shock, sending waves of pleasure radiating from your chest to every corner of your body. 

“Fuck!” 

Your breaths come in ragged gasps, your heart racing in tandem with the fervent rhythm building inside you. Each touch, each kiss, each tug of his lips and flick of his tongue sends bolts of pleasure coursing through your veins. The intensity of the sensations threatens to consume you as your desire ignites into an uncontrollable blaze. 

“Yoongi,” you moan his name like a prayer, your voice heavy with longing and urgency. Every fiber of your being is ablaze with a potent cocktail of yearning, pleasure and anticipation. You can hardly contain the rising tide of ecstasy that threatens to drown you in its overwhelming embrace.

His relentless devotion to your pleasure is nothing short of intoxicating. As he shifts his focus to your neglected breast, his lips and tongue work their magic, creating a symphony of sensations that reverberate through your entire body. The contrast between the warm, wet caresses of his mouth and the delicious friction of his fingers on your other nipple sends you spiraling deeper into ecstasy. 

You arch your back, offering yourself to him, a willing canvas for his passionate artistry. Each flicker of his tongue, each gentle bite, each tantalizing suckle draws you closer to the precipice of pleasure. Your fingers clutch at the sheets, desperately seeking purchase.

Every nerve in your body is humming with electric desire, and your senses are heightened to an almost unbearable level. Yoongi’s skilled ministrations on your breasts send waves of pleasure crashing through you, but you yearn for more, aching for the ultimate release that’s tantalizingly close.

“I’m close!” 

Your words tumble from your lips in breathless desperation, your voice a symphony of need as you cling to the precipice of ecstasy.

“Touch yourself, babe.” 

His husky command sends a shiver down your spine, your breath hitching as your fingers hesitates for a moment. 

The van seems to pulse with electric anticipation as you slide your trembling hand between your thighs, your fingers finding their way to the wet heat between your legs. The room is charged with an electrifying tension as your right hand ventures lower, sliding beneath your shorts and panties. 

A shiver of anticipation runs down your spine as your fingertips make contact with your already slick and throbbing clit. 

“Ah!” With a sharp intake of breath, you begin to caress the sensitive bud in slow, tantalizing circles. Each touch sends ripples of pleasure coursing through your body, drawing out sweet sighs and breathy moans from your trembling lips.

As you continue your fervent exploration, Yoongi’s gaze remains fixed on you, a mix of desire and adoration in his eyes. 

Every gasp, every whimper, every sultry moan that escapes your lips is like music to his ears, stoking the flames of his desire. He watches your pleasure intensify, your body aching and writhing in response to your own ministrations. 

The sight of you on the precipice of ecstasy, with flushed cheeks and tousled hair, ignited a primal hunger within him. His own arousal throbs painfully, but despite the overwhelming urge to claim you, he exercises restraints, driven by an unspoken desire to ensure your pleasure takes precedence. He wants nothing more than to witness you unravel in the most euphoric release, to be the catalyst of your satisfaction.

With each passing moment, he can sense your climax drawing nearer. Your breath quickens, your movement becomes more frantic, and your fingers work their magic with a fervor that borders on desperation.

The crescendo of pleasure builds within you, a whirlwind of sensations that threatens to consume your very being. 

Your fingers dance over your engorged clit, tracing patterns of desire that mirror the fervent rhythm of your heart. It’s a symphony of ecstasy, each note played in tandem with Yoongi’s fervent ministrations on your sensitive nipples.

His talented mouth explores the peaks of your breasts with an unrelenting hunger, switching between them as if he’s trying to draw forth every once of pleasure within you. His lips, tongue, and teeth create a symphony of sensations on your sensitive nubs, a symphony that resonates through your body, leaving you trembling on the precipice of bliss.

Then it happens. 

The final, exquisite note in your symphony of pleasure. 

It crashes over you like a tidal wave, drowning you in a sea of euphoria. 

Your body aches, toes curling, and a guttural moan tears from your lips, punctuated by the sweetest sound of Yoongi’s name.

Every fiber of your being seems to vibrate with pleasure, your senses overwhelmed by the intensity of the moment. It’s a rapture that paints your vision with vibrant colors and sends fireworks exploding behind your closed eyelids. In that instant, you’re entirely lost in the throes of your orgasm, a captive of the intense pleasure that courses through your veins.

Yoongi, with his lips still pressed to your breasts, feels the seismic shift within you, the cascade of pleasure that surges through your body. 

You gently push Yoongi away, your body still tingling from the intense pleasure of your orgasm. As you meet his gaze, you can see a mixture of emotions in his eyes; love, desire and an undeniable hunger. 

It’s a potent combination that mirrors your own desire, and you can’t wait any longer. Your body craves his touch, his closeness, and the fulfillment that only he can provide. 

You want him now.

“Yoongi, I need you now,” with a sense of urgency and raw desire burning in your eyes, you plead with Yoongi, your voice a husky whisper that conveys the depth of your need. Every second that passes feels like an eternity, and you can no longer bear the anticipation. 

You’re aching for him, your body yearning to be filled and consumed by him.

As you hastily discard your shorts and panties, your actions are driven by an almost primal need. 

Yoongi, sensing your desperation, doesn’t waste a moment. He’s equally consumed by desire, his body throbbing with longing for you. His cock, straining against the confines of his boxers, is a testament to his own need for release. 

A knowing chuckle escapes his lips, a mix of amusement and desire, as he helps you remove your remaining clothing. 

Your fingers tremble with a mixture of anticipation and excitement as you grab onto the elastic of Yoongi’s boxers. 

The knowledge that you are about to reveal the object of your deepest desire sends a shiver down your spine. 

With a swift, almost eager motion, you roll down the fabric and pull it down, exposing Yoongi’s throbbing cock to the morning air. The sight before you takes your breath away. It’s not your first encounter with a dick, by no means, but this is different. 

Yoongi’s cock is a work of art, beautifully sculpted and perfectly proportioned. Its girth is something to behold, stretching your imagination as to how it will feel when it’s buried deep inside you. 

The reddened tip glistens with a bead of precum, a visual testament to his undeniable desire for you.

A teasing smile dances on your lips as you lick them, your gaze fixed on his cock. 

It’s a moment of pure, unfiltered desire as you reach out, your hand trembling with anticipation. You’re captivated by the pulsing heat emanating from him, and the thought of how he’ll feel in your grasp ignites a fire within you. 

Your fingers brush against the silky skin, and you can’t help but let out a soft, appreciative gasp at the sensation. As your hand closes around his throbbing length, you know that there’s no turning back from the ecstasy that awaits you both.

Your eagerness is palpable as you stroke his dick, desire burning in your eyes. His raspy, breathless voice sends shivers down your spine as he anticipates your next move. With a devilish glint in your eyes, you slowly let go of his throbbing cock, releasing it from your gentle grasp.

“I know what you’re thinking, babe,” he pants, his voice laced with a mix of desire and restraint, “but if you do that, I’m gonna come in five seconds, and that would be embarrassing.”

You can’t help but pout in mock offense, your lips forming a playful, sultry curve. Your own arousal is undeniable, but you’re willing to indulge in some teasing foreplay before diving into the depth of passion. You just really want to suck him off, or at least give him a hand. 

“I would rather come inside your pussy,” his sultry words send a delicious thrill coursing through your body, and your breath hitches as his warm tongue grazes your earlobe. You can’t help but squirm beneath him, your need for him growing more intense by the second.

Your hand, guided by desire and need, finds its way back to his throbbing cock, fingers wrapping around it firmly, but not too tight. You begin to stroke him slowly, your touch teasing and deliberate.

Yoongi’s eyes darken with desire as he watches your skilled fingers dance over his length. The intensity of the moment hangs in the air, and you both know you’re playing with fire.

“God, I’d love that,” you gasp, the mere thought sending shivers of anticipation racing down your spine, your voice trembling with desire.

He chuckles again and reaches over your head inside one of the cabinets closest to you. 

He pulls out a pack of condoms. Your eyes go wide, as you wonder why he had condoms in the cabinet, “Did you expect this to happen when we packed for this trip over a month ago?” 

You pout, caught between surprise and amusement. He just chuckles more as he rips it open with his mouth, “I bought them yesterday at the train station,” and at this revelation, your eyes go even wider. 

“After yesterday, I really wanted to make love to you, so yeah,” he says, stroking his dick teasingly and releasing a groan that sends your heart racing.

Before he rolls the condom on, he looks down at you, his eyes filled with desire and concern.

“Do you need any prep?” he asks, his voice husky with anticipation. Your gaze drifts to his thick dick, and you can’t help but feel a mix of excitement and nervousness. 

“Maybe, yeah,” you admit, your voice a soft whisper filled with awe as you look from his impressive length to his hand holding the condom. “To be honest, it’s been a while, and you’re… well, you’re quite big. So, some prep would probably be best,” you mumble, your cheeks flushed with both desire and anticipation, as he discards the condom somewhere in the sheets.

“I’ll stretch you with my fingers, okay?” 

He says, his gaze locked with yours as he sits back on his knees and gently spreads your legs. You nod eagerly, desire burning in your eyes. You can barely contain your need for him; every second feels like an eternity, and you crave his touch like never before.

“Damn, you’re so wet,” he murmurs, his voice laced with desire, as he slides a finger over your slick folds, teasing your sensitive clit before gently pushing one finger inside your warm, welcoming core. 

The sensation sends shivers down your spine, and you arch your back, aching for more of his touch. The moment he slips one of his fingers inside you, a low, needy moan escapes your lips. It’s been far too long since you’ve been with a partner, and the feeling of his digit inside you sends waves of pleasure coursing through your body. 

As good as your toys have been, nothing can quite compare to the satisfaction of the human touch.

He continues to work his fingers inside you, a slow and deliberate rhythm that has you practically melting beneath his touch. With each push and pull, you can feel yourself relaxing and opening up to him. When he adds a second finger, your reaction is immediate. 

A soft, needy moan escapes your lips, and you can’t help but close your eyes as waves of arousal wash over you, making you feel like putty in his hands.

“Damn, you weren’t kidding about how tight you are,” he gasps, his voice filled with a heady mix of pleasure and desire. His eyes devour your flushed form, tracing the contours of your slightly sweaty skin. 

Your chest rises and falls rapidly, your lips are bitten a tempting shade of red, and your eyes are pools of intense desire, making him ache for you even more.

Your voice comes out in a breathy, desperate plea, the urgency in your tone impossible to ignore, “Fuck, Yoongi!” As he continues to stretch you, even adding a third finger, you can feel the tightness gradually giving way to aching need. 

“Yoongi, please,” you whimper, your body trembling with anticipation. “I need you inside me now.”

You watch with bated breath as he sheaths himself with a fresh condom, the anticipation building with each passing second. His eyes lock onto yours, a hunger burning in the depths as he positions himself at your entrance. 

The tension in the van is palpable, and you can practically feel the heat radiating from his throbbing cock as it brushes against your slick folds. Your heart races, and you can’t help but let out a soft, needy moan, urging him to take the plunge and fill you with his dick.

As he enters you, a rush of sensations floods your senses. 

The slow, deliberate slide of his thick cock into your tight, wet and warm pussy sends shivers down your spine. The stretch is exquisite, a delicious mix of pleasure and desire that leaves you craving more. You can feel every inch of him, and it’s as if he’s filling a void you didn’t even know existed. 

Your pussy clenches around him, aching to be completely consumed by his desire, and you can’t help but arch your back, silently urging him to bury himself deeper within you.

“Fuck, you’re so tight.” 

Yoongi’s voice trembles with desire as he inches deeper into your velvety depths. 

Each millimeter of his length that disappears inside you elicits a chorus of moans and gasps from your lips, a symphony of pleasure that fills the van. Your fingers dig into his thighs, your grip growing tighter as he takes you to the brink of ecstasy. 

His control and consideration for your pleasure make the anticipation all the more electrifying, and you can’t help but arch your back again, pressing your body further into his irresistible embrace, urging him to claim you completely.

“Move, faster,” you voice quivers with desperation as you implore him for more, your body aching for the passionate rhythm only he can provide. Yoongi’s movements quicken, the intoxicating friction sending sparks of pleasure racing through your veins. 

With every thrust, he delves deeper into your core, his balls slapping against you in a hypnotic cadence that echoes through the van. 

“Fuck!” 

As your bodies unite in a torrent of desire, you gasp for breath, feeling every inch of him stretching and filling you to the brim. Your nails dig into his thighs as he starts a rhythm that’s both electrifying and intoxicating. With each thrust, he claims you further, and your moans of pleasure harmonize with his ragged breaths. 

“Shit, I don’t think I’m going to last long,” he pants, as he begins to pull out slowly.

Lost in a whirlwind of sensations, you can barely find your voice, but you manage to gasp, “Yes, Yoongi, yes!”

His relentless pace has you teetering on the brink of release, your body a symphony of pleasure as his grip on your hips tighten and he plunges into you over and over again, “Fuck, you’re gorgeous.”

You lock your gaze with his, your eyes blazing with desire, and you feel an overwhelming rush of desire surging through your veins.

Desperation drips from your voice as you arch your back and beg, “Please, Yoongi, give it to me harder.” Your fingers dig into the sheets, your body craving his every movement. You lock eyes with him, a silent plea for him to take you to the pinnacle of pleasure. 

“Fuck, babe, if I do that I’m afraid you won’t be able to walk,” he groans as he tries to restrain himself, because fuck he would like that too. Your words tumble out in a breathless whimper, “I don’t care, Yoongi, I need it. I need you.” 

Your desire for him is undeniable, and you’re willing to embrace the consequences. 

The urgency in your voice, coupled with your longing gaze, fuels his own desire, pushing him closer to the edge. Yet, his love for you and the plans you both have today hold him back. Last time you hiked, he did enjoy carrying you down the mountain, but damn he really just wants to intertwine his fingers with yours as you walk hand in hand later.

Your voice is filled with raw desire as you repeat each syllable in a growl, “I don’t care,” your eyes locked onto his. 

In this moment, nothing else matters but the burning connection between you and Yoongi. It’s a declaration of your insatiable need for him, a desire that threatens to consume you both completely.

“Fuck, then turn around.” 

He instructs as he pulls out and lets your legs down from his shoulders. With a sultry smile and a flick of your hair, you turn around eagerly, your body trembling with anticipation. You arch your back and present yourself to him, your ass enticingly swaying as you tease him with your seductive dance like you did yesterday, but today you finally get all of him. 

He seizes your hips firmly, his grip reassuring and possessive, and lines up his throbbing dick with your slick entrance. 

With an almost primal need, he thrusts into you in a single, commanding motion. The sensation is electrifying, sending shockwaves of pleasure through your body, and you can’t help but gasp in ecstasy, your world momentarily reduced to the overpowering connection between your bodies. 

Your fingers dig into the sheets as you try to steady yourself, overwhelmed by the intensity of the moment.

“Are you okay?” He breathes as he remains still inside you, his hands tenderly caressing your hips. You offer a soft chuckle in response, head sinking into the sheets as you catch your breath. 

“Yeah, I just didn’t expect it,” you admit, your voice tinged with a mix of surprise and pleasure. With unwavering determination, he withdraws and seizes your hips, initiating an unyielding assault on your core. Each thrust delves deep, reaching places that send waves of ecstasy through your body, causing your head to dip lower, your senses overwhelmed by the intensity of the moment.

“Fuck.” He exclaims in a breathless voice, savoring the erotic view unfolding before him. 

Your luscious curves are on full display, the arch of your back accentuating your enchanting figure, and your tousled hair framing your face as it disappears into the sheets, making the scene even more tantalizing.

As he repeatedly targets that exquisite sweet spot inside you, you can’t help but lose yourself in ecstasy, “That’s it!”

Your voice rises in a crescendo of pleasure, your cries echoing through the van, mingling with his primal groans of desire. With each powerful thrust, you instinctively match his rhythm, a symphony of passion and longing unfolding between your entwined bodies.

Amidst his fervent, rhythmic thrusts, he manages to gasp out a question, his voice strained and breathless, “Are you close again?”

Beads of sweat cascade down his forehead, and his disheveled long hair clings to his face. He struggles to maintain control, his eyes locked on your flushed form.

You can only respond with an eager nod, your voice hitched in a husky whisper, “Yes, Yoongi, so close.” Your body trembles with anticipation, every fiber of your being aching for release.

His touch on your swollen clit is electrifying, a single stroke enough to push you over the edge. Your world shatters into a kaleidoscope of sensation as you scream his name, the pleasure crashing over you in relentless waves. Your breath comes in ragged pants as you ride out the intense, quaking aftershocks of your climax.

As your climax engulfs you, your inner muscles contract with an irresistible force, squeezing around his dick in a deliciously tight embrace. 

“Shit,” he can hardly contain himself, his thrusts growing erratic as he fights to hold on, but the intensity of your pleasure becomes his undoing. 

With a guttural groan, he spills his warm liquid into the condom, his hips bucking as his release surges into you. You can feel his dick twitching inside your throbbing warmth pussy, a tantalizing reminder of the intimacy you share. 

A longing for a more raw and bare connection lingers in your thoughts, a desire perhaps to be explored another time.

As you both pant for air, the remnants of pleasure still coursing through your bodies, Yoongi continues to thrust into you, savoring the exquisite sensations. 

He yearns to stay locked in this intimate moment with you, to revel in the connection you share, but the intensity of his release leaves his once rigid dick now growing soft. His desire is undeniable, but for now, the sensations are overwhelming, and he can’t help but retreat from the depths of your warm pussy. 

You both lay there, spent and sated, the aftermath of your desire binding you together in a cocoon of contentment.

“Fuck, that was incredible.” 

Yoongi breathes out in a husky voice as he slowly withdraws from the depths of your desire, his gaze locked onto yours with an intensity that sends shivers down your spine. He carefully removes the condom, tying it off, and then tosses it aside, the desire still smoldering in his eyes. 

The van is filled with the heady scent of your shared passion, and the aftermath of your heated lovemaking lingers in the air as a reminder of the intensity you both just experienced.

“Fuck, yes. Good morning to you too,” you tease, sending him a playful flying kiss as you gracefully turn around, settling onto your back. 

The soft morning light filters through the curtains, casting a warm, golden glow over your entangled bodies. Your post-orgasmic bliss has left you feeling utterly content, and the playful banter between you and Yoongi only adds to the intimacy of the moment.

Yoongi joins you on the bed, and together, you both lay there, chests rising and falling as you catch your breath. The intimate connection you’ve just shared still lingers in the air, a potent reminder of your passionate encounter. As you lay side by side, you steal glances at each other, your eyes conveying a mixture of desire, affection, and a newfound sense of closeness.

Yoongi reaches for the cabinet once more, retrieving a small towel, and with gentle care, he starts to clean you up between your legs. 

You can’t help but appreciate his tenderness in this intimate moment, and you express your gratitude with a soft smile, whispering, “Thank you, you’re so sweet.” The affectionate gesture further deepens the connection between you two, leaving a warm and lingering sensation of closeness that transcends the physical realm.

“Always,” he smirks as his eyes roam over your naked form, a playful glint in his eyes. “We have to get ready for the hike. I’ll whip up some breakfast. You can take a refreshing shower in the lake if you’d like,” he suggests, tossing the towel aside before reaching for his boxers, which have disappeared somewhere in the rumpled sheets. 

“Will you join me when you’ve finished making breakfast?” you inquire with a playful flutter of your eyelashes, your movements graceful as you rise from the bed. You begin searching for your clothes and a towel, your voice laced with a tempting invitation that hints at the anticipation of sharing an intimate moment in the tranquil waters of the lake.

“Fuck yeah.” 

He responds with a wicked smirk, and as you meet his gaze, you can already see the flames of desire dancing in his eyes, mirroring the burning passion that rages within your own. 

With excitement bubbling in your chest, you efficiently pack your bags and don your hiking gear, preparing for the adventure ahead. The thought of ascending Palgongsan Mountain and sharing this experience with Yoongi fuels your anticipation. 

Every strap tightened and every buckle secured serves as a reminder of the thrilling journey awaiting you both.

Sitting side by side on the bus, you and Yoongi share a moment of awe as Palgongsan Mountain comes into view. 

Its vibrant colors, a symphony of green, yellow, and orange, blend together in a breathtaking masterpiece. You turn to Yoongi, a sense of wonder lighting up your eyes, recognizing that he’s witnessed this natural beauty countless times before. However, for you, this is an entirely new experience, your first glimpse of Daegu’s scenic marvels. 

“It’s so incredibly beautiful,” you marvel, your words filled with genuine amazement, sharing this captivating moment with him.

Standing before the majestic mountain, you’re left utterly breathless. Your next move is towards the Cable Cars, where you and Yoongi board and embark on a remarkable journey that nearly takes you to the mountain’s peak. 

As the Cable Car ascends, you’re treated to an awe-inspiring spectacle. The colors of nature come alive beneath your feet, a mesmerizing dance of hues akin to the strokes of a masterful painting, creating an unforgettable picture. The feeling of floating above this breathtaking landscape etches a memory that will forever linger in your heart.

Exiting the Cable Cars, you and Yoongi are now standing at the precipice of the mountain’s summit. With unwavering determination, you set your sights on the hiking trail that will guide you to the pinnacle. It’s a path marked by adventure, beckoning you to explore the hidden treasures of nature.

As you step onto the trail, your fingers intertwine with Yoongi’s, forming a connection that transcends words. 

Walking hand in hand, the world around you seems to fade away, leaving only the two of you in this idyllic moment. It feels like a page ripped from a romantic novel, a shared journey into the unknown, your hearts beating in harmony as you navigate the path together. 

While the title of your relationship remains unspoken, the bond you’re forming feels undeniable, and for now, you’re content to savor the sweet uncertainty of what the future holds. And thankfully your back doesn’t hurt as Yoongi was afraid it would.

Upon reaching the summit, you stumble upon a quaint store nestled in the mountains. Gathering some refreshments, you both settle on a weathered bench, perched like conquerors overlooking the vast panorama of Daegu. 

The view from this height is nothing short of breathtaking, with the sprawling cityscape spread out beneath you like a living tapestry of lights and life. The sensation of being on top of the world, sharing this moment with Yoongi, fills your hearts with a sense of accomplishment and contentment. 

It’s a view that seems to mirror the possibilities of your new addition to your friendship, stretching out in every direction, waiting to be explored.

As you both gaze out at the mesmerizing view, Yoongi’s voice breaks the tranquil silence, his eyes briefly meeting yours before he poses a question that carries the weight of curiosity and sincerity.

“Can I ask you something?” 

He inquires, his tone laced with a subtle vulnerability.

You turn to him, your own eyes filled with warmth and genuine interest, and reply with a gentle nod, encouraging him to share his thoughts. 

“Of course, Yoongi, go ahead.”

“How come you haven’t had sex in a long time?” 

Yoongi’s unexpected question catches you off guard, and you momentarily struggle to control your reaction, almost choking on your water. His gentle chuckle eases the tension, and you regain your composure. With a sip of water, you offer an honest response, your words carrying a mix of candor and humor.

“Honestly?” 

You begin, setting your water bottle down, “I’ve been tired of the casual hookups, and I didn’t really feel satisfied, so I settled with my toys. Plus, that way, I didn’t have to deal with toxic men,” you quip, savoring the refreshing sip of water before continuing.

“Toxic men?” he inquires, intrigued by your choice of words.

You don’t hold back, letting your frustration and past wounds color your response. “Yeah, lying, cheating fuckboys,” you assert, your voice filled with a mixture of anger and resignation. “The kind who’ll make you feel like you’re their whole world one day, only to tear you down the next,” you explain, your shoulders lifting in a shrug as you reflect on the painful memories.

“Shit, I’m sorry,” Yoongi says, his eyes filled with genuine sympathy, “The guys I know, me included, aren’t like that,” he reassures you with sincerity.

You offer a small smile, feeling a warmth in your chest as you place your hand on his. “I know, Yoon,” you say softly, your eyes meeting his. “Guess I’ve just been unlucky. What about you?”

“Just a lot of casual hookups,” Yoongi admits with a hint of regret, his gaze briefly falling to his hands, “Most of my time goes into the garage, which is also why I broke up with my last girlfriend.”

“Would you want to be in a relationship again?” you ask, your voice soft, a mixture of hope and anxiety in your eyes. You hold your breath, waiting for his response, unsure of what to expect.

“Yeah, with the right woman.” 

He says with a smile that crinkles at the corners of his eyes, his gaze never leaving yours. As those words hang in the air, you can’t help but wonder and hope, your heart beating a little faster, if you might just be the right woman for him.

Today, Yoongi has planned for you to meet his family, and a mix of excitement and nervousness bubbles within you. 

You’ve heard about his family’s restaurant in Daegu, where they’ve honed their culinary expertise, and you’re well aware of Yoongi’s extraordinary talent in the kitchen. 

As you prepare to meet his loved ones, your senses tingle with anticipation. Your heart flutters with the thought of sharing this special part of his life. Despite your nerves, you’re confident that his family, who’ve nurtured such a remarkable person, must be as warm and wonderful as he is.

You board the bus to their family home, your anticipation growing with every passing mile. As you arrive, you’re immediately struck by the grandeur of the house. It’s a majestic residence that exudes warmth and comfort.

With a hopeful yet nervous heart, you approach the front door and raise your hand to knock. 

The door swings open, revealing Yoongi’s older sister. 

Her face lights up with an infectious smile, and her eyes dance with excitement. 

Without hesitation, she pulls Yoongi into a warm, tight embrace, a mix of joy and nostalgia twinkling in her eyes. Despite his initial grumbling, Yoongi reciprocates the hug, his stoic facade melting away in the presence of his beloved sister.

Then, her gaze shifts to you, and a mischievous glint sparkles in her eyes as she playfully inquires, “Is that your girlfriend?” 

Your cheeks immediately flush with embarrassment, and you find yourself at a loss for words. 

The label of your relationship with Yoongi has never been explicitly defined, leaving you in an awkward predicament. 

But before you can muster a response, Yoongi steps in with a casual yet protective tone, “Nah, we’re just really good friends.” His words hang in the air, tinged with a hint of something unspoken, leaving you to wonder about the true nature of your friendship.

His sister astutely observes the swift transformation in your expression, which now portrays a poignant blend of regret and sadness. Deep down, you feel a whirlwind of conflicting emotions—simultaneous waves of disappointment and anger. How could Yoongi casually introduce you as ‘just friends’ when the connection between you both runs far deeper?

Yet, in the recesses of your heart, you grapple with the realization that you’ve never truly had that defining conversation to cement your relationship status. It’s a bitter truth that leaves you torn between yearning for more and fearing that you might have inadvertently pushed him away with your silent expectations.

His sister ushers you deeper into the heart of their childhood home, where the familiar scent of home-cooked meals wafts from the kitchen. 

There, you find Yoongi’s mother, her hands deftly moving across the countertop, orchestrating a symphony of flavors. Her warm smile greets you, and you return the gesture with a respectful bow, appreciating the comfort of this inviting kitchen and the sense of family that permeates every corner.

You extend a warm greeting to Yoongi’s father, who is meticulously setting the table in the cozy dining room. 

The room exudes an air of tradition, with polished wooden furniture and framed family photos adorning the walls. 

As you watch him arrange the utensils and place mats, you can’t help but feel a sense of admiration for the family’s close-knit bond and the effort they put into maintaining their traditions. 

You find yourself in the cozy living room, engaged in a polite yet slightly uncomfortable conversation with Yoongi’s sister and her husband. 

As she peppers you with questions, your mind races to find the right answers; how and when you and Yoongi met and you vividly recall the day you met him, the memory of your car breaking down in the middle of nowhere, and the serendipity of Jimin calling him to help you a decade ago. 

When she inquires about your relationship status with Yoongi, you can’t help but feel a pang of disappointment as you echo the same words he used earlier, ‘just friends’, though it knots your stomach with unspoken desires. 

As the questions continue, you begin to feel a subtle tension building within you. You find yourself carefully measuring your responses, your eyes occasionally glancing toward Yoongi in search of reassurance.

When asked about the duration of your vacation, your lips curve into a polite smile, but a flicker of excitement ignites in your eyes. “About another month and a half,” you respond, your voice laced with a mix of anticipation and wonder at the adventures yet to come.

As your job in marketing becomes the topic of conversation, you lean forward, your enthusiasm shining through. Each word you speak carries the weight of your ambition and dedication to your career. 

“I work in marketing,” you explain, “helping businesses connect with their audience in meaningful ways.” The more you talk about your work, the more you feel a sense of pride and accomplishment, the embers of your professional journey glowing brightly in your words.

As Yoongi’s sister turns her attention to him, you watch with interest, wondering how he’ll respond to her probing questions. 

The living room seems to hold its breath, awaiting his answers. Yoongi, reclining comfortably in a nearby armchair, exudes an air of calm confidence as he addresses each query.

When asked about his garage and work, his eyes light up with a passionate fire. 

“Work’s going great,” he shares, his voice a harmonious blend of pride and determination. “The garage has been keeping me busier than ever, and I’m loving every moment of it. I get to work on amazing cars and meet incredible people.”

As the conversation shifts to his relationship status, Yoongi’s smile takes on a hint of playfulness. 

“Well,” he begins, “I’ve been focusing on my career, but you never know when the right person will come along.” His response carries an air of mystery, leaving room for interpretation, and you can’t help but feel a flicker of hope, wondering if you might be that ‘right person’.

As the conversation takes an unexpected turn toward the topic of children and grandchildren, you find yourself caught up in the familial exchange. Yoongi’s response is laced with a touch of sibling rivalry, countering with a smirk, “You’re the eldest, so you should be the first.”

Yoongi’s sister, perhaps inspired by her own maternal instincts, playfully hints at future generations by caressing her tummy. 

The moment is charged with anticipation and joy, and you’re not entirely sure why, but it triggers a spontaneous, delighted gasp from your lips, followed by a small, joyful shriek. The room falls into a hushed, expectant silence, all eyes turning to Yoongi’s sister. 

Her subtle gesture carries a world of meaning, and Yoongi, with wide-eyed astonishment, breaks the silence with a heartfelt question: “Are you pregnant?”

In response, she nods, a radiant smile lighting up her face, and the room erupts in a chorus of heartfelt congratulations.

As laughter fills the room and Yoongi’s sister playfully teases him about not having an excuse anymore to delay having children of his own, he responds with a hearty, confident laugh of his own. He knows that his journey will unfold in its own time, and he’s unapologetically determined to live life on his terms.

As you all gather around the dining table, the fragrant aroma of the Korean feast engulfs the room, making your mouths water in anticipation. 

The table is adorned with a colorful array of dishes, each one meticulously prepared and bursting with flavors that dance on your taste buds. Kimchi, with its spicy and tangy kick, stands as a vibrant centerpiece, surrounded by the inviting allure of Bibimbap’s sizzling stone bowl, the mouthwatering tteokbokki, and the succulent bulgogi. 

The table is a tapestry of Korean culinary delights, showcasing the rich heritage and diversity of flavors, from the crispy Samgyeopsal to the comforting warmth of Japchae and the hearty Jjigae. Your eyes dart from one dish to another, trying to decide where to start, and the promise of fried chicken adds an exciting twist to this already indulgent spread. 

With each dish more tempting than the last, you can’t help but feel a deep appreciation for the cultural richness and culinary mastery before you. 

As you take your first bite, the explosion of flavors on your palate brings a symphony of delight to the dinner table, making this gathering a truly unforgettable experience.

Amid the mouthwatering feast laid before you, the conversation around the table continues to flow like a gentle river. 

Yoongi’s mother, a warm and welcoming presence, leans in with genuine curiosity sparkling in her eyes as she asks the familiar question about how you and Yoongi crossed paths.

With a smile, you recount the serendipitous encounter from a decade ago, a tale woven with threads of chance and fate. Your words paint a vivid picture of a young woman in distress, stranded with a broken-down car, and a chance meeting with a skilled mechanic who happened to be none other than Yoongi. 

You can thank Jimin for introducing you. The story carries a touch of destiny, one that led to a friendship that has grown and deepened over the years.

As you share this personal history, the table seems to come alive with shared laughter and nods of approval. It’s a testament to the power of chance meetings and the bonds that can form when hearts connect, even under unexpected circumstances. 

Yoongi’s mother listens intently, her smile growing as she begins to understand the special connection between you and her son, a connection that extends far beyond mere friendship.

With a gracious nod and a warm expression, Yoongi’s mother extends a heartfelt invitation. 

“You know,” she begins, “while you’re here in Daegu, you simply must visit our family restaurant. It’s been a labor of love for us, and I would be delighted to have you there.” 

Her words carry a sense of pride and tradition, and you can see the deep connection she has with the family business. The idea of sharing a meal in their restaurant feels like more than just an invitation; it’s an offering of warmth, a way to welcome you into their world and share a piece of their family’s history with you. 

As you accept her invitation with gratitude and enthusiasm, you can’t help but feel that this trip to Daegu is turning into an unforgettable journey filled with not only breathtaking sights but also heartwarming connections.

The food is nothing short of extraordinary, each dish a symphony of flavors that dance on your taste buds. 

As you savor each bite, you can’t help but admire the culinary expertise that has been passed down through generations in Yoongi’s family. The flavors are a perfect reflection of the love and dedication that goes into their cooking. Around the table, the conversation flows effortlessly. Yoongi’s family is warm and welcoming, making you feel like you’ve known them for years. 

Stories are shared, laughter fills the air, and you find yourself feeling grateful for this unexpected moment of connection.

After the satisfying meal, Yoongi leads you down a hallway filled with memories, photographs, and some familiar faces frozen in time. The scent of nostalgia lingers in the air as he pushes open a wooden door, revealing his old room. 

Stepping inside, you’re instantly enveloped in a cocoon of memories. The room is a time capsule, preserving fragments of Yoongi’s past. You notice posters of his favorite bands still adorning the walls, faded and weathered but still carrying the same rebellious spirit.

As he shares anecdotes of his teenage years, the room comes alive with the echoes of laughter, dreams, and aspirations. It’s a place where the past and present collide, where you feel closer to Yoongi than ever before.

In this room, you discover a different facet of him—a young dreamer, passionate and determined, who embarked on a journey that would eventually lead him to you. 

As you prepare to leave Yoongi’s childhood home and return to the campsite for a restful night’s sleep, his sister gently pulls you aside. 

Her voice is hushed, carrying the weight of understanding and a hint of mischievousness as she leans in close, her words intended for your ears alone.

“I can see how you look at him,” she murmurs, a knowing smile dancing on her lips. 

“You should make a move.”

A blush creeps across your cheeks, a testament to the unspoken connection that has already blossomed between you and Yoongi. 

You can’t help but chuckle softly, realizing that her keen perception has unveiled a secret that your hearts have already whispered to each other. 

It’s a moment of shared understanding, a silent acknowledgment of the budding romance that has woven its way into your journey. With a conspiratorial nod, you convey your gratitude for her words, knowing that the path ahead holds the promise of something beautiful and profound. 

The stars above seem to twinkle with approval as you head back to the campsite, the night filled with the magic of possibilities.

The desire to have that important conversation with Yoongi simmers beneath the surface, a question that lingers on the tip of your tongue, waiting for the right moment to be spoken. 

It’s the uncharted territory of your emotions, a territory filled with both hope and trepidation. You yearn to understand what you are to him, to unravel the intricate threads of your friendship.

Yet, doubt and uncertainty cast their shadows. 

What if his intentions differ from yours? 

What if he prefers the current arrangement, comfortable in its casualness?

His declaration of ‘liking’ you hangs in the air, a tantalizing clue but not the complete answer to the question that occupies your thoughts.

For now, you choose to immerse yourself in the present, savoring each stolen moment with him. The allure of his presence makes it effortless to lose yourself in the intricate tapestry of emotions and desires that entwine your souls. The unspoken question lingers, but as time unfolds, so too may the answers you seek.

Today, the world unfurls before you like a vast canvas, ready to be painted with the vibrant strokes of your adventure. 

After weeks of anticipation, your bicycles are no longer silent spectators, dangling on the back of Holly; they are now your chariots, poised to carry you through a day of exploration.

With the wind tousling your hair and the rhythmic hum of tires on pavement as your soundtrack, you embark on your cycling escapade. 

The world blurs around you as you pedal through the cycling park, the two of you in perfect harmony with each other and the world. Eventually, you find yourselves in a tranquil park, a picturesque oasis nestled amidst the bustling city. 

Here, under the generous shade of swaying trees, you lay out a picnic blanket, surrounded by the gentle whispers of leaves and the distant laughter of children at play. Lunchtime arrives as a welcomed intermission in your day of adventure. Your meal is a symphony of flavors and shared laughter, a testament to the simple joys of life and the beauty of your friendship.

After days of vibrant exploration and exhilarating adventures, the two of you decide it’s time for a change of pace. You yearn for a day of tranquility and relaxation, a chance to immerse yourselves in the soothing embrace of Daegu’s hidden gem, Spa Valley.

As you step into this oasis of serenity, the world outside seems to fade away, replaced by the calming ambiance of the spa. The air is filled with the gentle whispers of steam rising from the hot springs, carrying with them promises of relaxation and rejuvenation.

Your journey through the spa takes you to the jjimjilbang, a realm where time slows down and cares dissipate like steam. Here, amidst the warmth of saunas and the serenity of traditional Korean spa treatments, you and Yoongi find yourselves immersed in a world of pure bliss.

The jjimjilbang’s soothing effects seem almost redundant for Yoongi, already blessed with an impeccable complexion and vitality. Yet, the experience proves to be more than just skin-deep, allowing the both of you to bask in the healing properties of the spa, feeling your worries and stresses evaporate with every passing moment.

In the midst of mid-August, a gentle shift in the air signals a welcome respite from the scorching heat that dominated the previous months. As the weather begins to cool ever so slightly, you find yourselves faced with a day where the possibilities are endless.

With a thoughtful smile, Yoongi suggests a plan for the day – one that resonates with your shared love for comfort and relaxation. 

The idea of spending a leisurely day inside the cozy confines of the van, cocooned in blankets and pillows, captures your imagination. As you both settle into your impromptu sanctuary, the van becomes a haven of comfort and contentment. 

Yoongi spoons you from behind, his head nestled perfectly against yours, creating a sense of intimacy and warmth that transcends mere physical proximity.

Together, you lose yourselves in the captivating world of k-dramas, each episode drawing you deeper into its intricate narratives and compelling characters. As the hours drift by, you revel in the simplicity of this shared moment, and with the sound of your steady breath, Yoongi drifts off to sleep.

Awakening from the tranquil embrace of a midday nap, Yoongi stirs at the gentle movements of your form. His eyes, still heavy with the remnants of sleep, meet yours as you reposition yourself. The corners of his lips curl upwards, as if an idea has blossomed within his mind. 

His voice, a low and raspy timbre softened by slumber, breaks the silence. “You know,” he begins, his words tinged with a hint of excitement, “I was thinking... How about a date tonight? To my parents’ restaurant.” 

The suggestion hangs in the air, poised like a secret waiting to be unveiled. In that moment, you catch a glimmer of something deeper in his eyes, a desire to share more of himself with you, to bring you into a cherished part of his world.

The prospect of a date carries a touch of anticipation, an invitation to explore the layers of your relationship. 

It’s an opportunity to see Yoongi in a different light, not just as the passionate and adventurous best friend you’ve come to adore, but also as a son and a part of a loving family.

As the day unfolds into evening, the prospect of this date fills the air with a sense of excitement, promising an evening filled with culinary delights and the warmth of family ties. And with each passing hour, the anticipation builds, making the moment when you step into that restaurant feel like the beginning of an unforgettable chapter in your shared journey.

Entering Yoongi’s parents’ restaurant, you’re enveloped in an atmosphere that exudes warmth and tradition. The subtle aroma of Korean spices and savory delights fills the air, creating a sensory embrace that immediately sets the tone for the evening.

The restaurant, bathed in soft, warm lighting, beckons you further. It’s a haven where tradition meets modernity, evident in the fusion of classic Korean dishes and contemporary culinary innovations. The menu is a treasure trove of choices, offering everything from time-honored Korean staples to the sizzle and delight of individual grills at every table.

Around you, diners chat, their laughter and clinking glasses composing a melodious background to the scene. The soft hum of conversations, punctuated by the sizzling sounds of barbecue, creates a symphony of camaraderie that resonates throughout the establishment.

As you settle into your seats, you can’t help but appreciate the familial atmosphere. There’s a sense of history here, a feeling of belonging that Yoongi shares with you, a connection to a place that has been a part of his life for as long as he can remember. 

The waitstaff, dressed in elegant uniforms, move with grace and precision, attending to the needs of each table. It’s clear that this is more than just a restaurant; it’s a labor of love, a testament to the dedication and passion of Yoongi’s family. 

As you peruse the menu, your senses are teased by the tantalizing descriptions of dishes, each one promising an unforgettable culinary journey. You can feel the excitement building, knowing that this evening will not only be a feast for the palate but also a celebration of shared experiences, flavors, and connections.

As you both savor the delectable dishes, the flavors dance on your taste buds, a symphony of tastes and textures that make each bite an exquisite experience. The rich, nuanced dishes served at Yoongi’s parents’ restaurant showcase the culinary heritage of Korea, and you can’t help but appreciate the artistry and care that goes into each creation.

As you savored the delectable Korean dishes, the warm and welcoming presence of Yoongi’s mother added an extra layer of comfort to the evening. Her brief visit, filled with genuine well-wishes and smiles, made you feel like a part of their family. 

It was moments like these that reminded you of the beauty of sharing a meal with loved ones, the way it could bridge gaps and create lasting memories.

With a contented sigh, you couldn’t help but express your delight. “Everything looks so good,” you said, your eyes sparkling with appreciation. “I’m having a great time.” 

Her smile in response was like a reassuring nod, a silent affirmation of your place at the table and in their hearts. As she left you two alone again, the atmosphere seemed to shimmer with the warmth of shared laughter and delicious food. It was a moment that etched itself into your memory, a testament to the bonds that were forming and the genuine connection you felt with Yoongi and his family.

Between bites, you and Yoongi engage in a delightful conversation, your voices creating a pleasant cadence in the cozy ambiance. His genuine interest in your thoughts warms your heart, making you feel even more connected to him.

He leans in slightly, his eyes reflecting the soft glow of the restaurant’s lighting as he asks about your experience meeting his family. It’s clear that he values your opinion, and you share your genuine thoughts, recounting the warmth and hospitality you felt during your visit.

The conversation naturally segues to your impressions of Daegu. With each word, you paint a vivid picture of your journey through the city—its charming streets, vibrant culture, and the breathtaking natural beauty you’ve had the privilege of witnessing. 

Your enthusiasm is palpable, and Yoongi listens intently, his own connection to the city deepening as he sees it through your eyes.

The Soju arrives at your table, its crystal-clear liquid shimmering in the soft candlelight. Yoongi, with practiced ease, takes the lead, pouring a generous amount into your glass, then into his. 

The scent of the traditional Korean spirit fills the air, its mildly sweet aroma inviting you to partake in this shared experience.

You watch as Yoongi raises his glass, the warm glow of the restaurant casting a golden sheen on his features. His eyes lock onto yours, and in that moment, you both understand that this gesture is more than just a drink; it’s a silent toast to the moments you’ve shared and the ones yet to come. 

With a slight smile, you clink your glasses together, the gentle chime of glass against glass resonating like a harmonious note in the air. 

Then, in perfect unison, you both bring the glasses to your lips and down the Soju with a practiced swig.

The liquid courses down your throat, igniting a warm, pleasant fire within. The initial burn gives way to a soothing, tingling sensation, and you can’t help but exchange an appreciative glance with Yoongi. 

Yoongi takes charge of the grill, sizzling slices of succulent meat to perfection. The tantalizing aroma fills the air, making your mouth water in anticipation. As he deftly maneuvers the chopsticks, flipping the meat and ensuring it’s cooked to perfection, a wave of warmth washes over you.

With a genuine smile, he picks up a perfectly cooked piece, the juices glistening as they cling to the tender meat. He extends his chopsticks towards you, offering you a bite with the kind of care that’s become second nature between you. 

You lean forward, parting your lips to accept the delicious mouthful he’s prepared. The flavors explode on your tongue, and for a moment, the world outside this cozy restaurant fades into insignificance. It’s just you, Yoongi, and the extraordinary flavors he’s introduced to your senses.

This simple yet intimate gesture sends your thoughts spiraling. The way he grills for you, feeds you, and how you share this meal together—it all feels so unmistakably domestic. You can’t help but ponder the ’just friends’ label that has lingered between you two.

As Yoongi pours another glass of Soju, the fiery liquid sparkles in the dimly lit ambiance of the restaurant. The soft glow of the overhead lanterns casts enchanting shadows on your faces, creating an intimate cocoon around your table. 

The restaurant’s lively chatter becomes a distant hum as the two of you delve deeper into conversation.

With each sip of Soju, a warm and pleasant buzz envelops you, blurring the edges of your thoughts and inhibitions. It’s as if the world outside this cozy corner has ceased to exist, leaving only the intoxicating blend of shared laughter and desire lingering between you. 

The atmosphere is palpable, charged with the electricity of unspoken emotions. Your eyes meet and lock, a silent conversation passing between them. 

As the Soju continues to flow, the barriers that have held you back begin to crumble. 

The desire that’s simmered beneath the surface now surges to the forefront, impossible to ignore. It’s a thrilling dance of emotions, both exhilarating and terrifying. 

You find yourself drawn to Yoongi, not just as a friend, but as something more. The unspoken tension in the air hangs heavy, like a question that begs to be answered. 

Amidst the Soju-fueled haze, your emotions swirl like a tumultuous sea. 

You long to ask Yoongi about the true nature of your relationship, to define the unspoken connection that binds you two together. But fear creeps in, casting a shadow of doubt over your heart. 

You’re terrified that seeking clarity might shatter the delicate balance you’ve built, that the answers you long for could unravel the beautiful moments you’ve shared.

So, reluctantly, you choose to dwell in the present, to immerse yourself in the warmth of the moment and let the intoxicating Soju serve as your temporary solace. It’s a bittersweet surrender to the current state of things, a conscious decision to savor what you have without demanding more.

Your feelings, though a tempest within, are hidden behind a façade of laughter and casual conversation. The unspoken words hang in the air, an invisible barrier that you dare not cross. In this dance of emotions, you find yourself pushing your desires and the need for labels into the recesses of your mind, at least for now.

It’s a precarious balancing act, one where the thrill of the unknown mingles with the fear of what might change if you dare to confront it. 

And so, you sip your Soju, sharing glances and secrets in silence, allowing the night to take its course.

As the sun begins its descent, casting a warm, golden hue across the landscape, you both decide to embark on a thrilling adventure at E-world, Daegu’s exhilarating theme park. 

The anticipation in the air is palpable as you enter this enchanting realm of wonder and excitement.

The park comes alive as dusk settles in, adorned with a dazzling array of vibrant lights that twinkle like stars in the night sky. Cherry blossoms, delicate and ethereal, sway gently in the breeze, adding an extra layer of enchantment to the scene.

Together, you and Yoongi savor a delightful dinner that fuels your energy for the exhilarating experiences that await. 

As the sun dips below the horizon, you delve into a whirlwind of excitement, riding carousels that spin you around in a whirl of laughter and joy. Yoongi’s infectious dizziness only adds to the merriment, making each ride all the more memorable.

The roller coasters, a symphony of adrenaline and screams, become the crescendo of your theme park adventure. With the wind rushing through your hair and hearts pounding in unison, you both embrace the exhilaration of each twisting turn and heart-pounding drop.

Yoongi might not be a thrill-seeker, but for your sake, he’s willing to embrace the excitement of the amusement park. As the neon lights paint the night sky, he watches you with a tender affection that makes your heart flutter. It’s in the way he gazes at you, his eyes tracing the contours of your delighted expressions.

Despite his own reservations, he joins you on the rides, and you can see a subtle hint of amusement in his eyes.

He savors the moments when your laughter fills the air, your eyes sparkle with childlike wonder, and your smile becomes a permanent fixture on your face. In these shared experiences, he finds joy in your happiness, and that’s enough to make every dizzying spin and heart-pounding drop worth it.

Your enjoyment becomes his pleasure, and the way you radiate pure delight is an enchanting sight. It’s a reminder of the simple yet profound connection you share, one that doesn’t rely on grand gestures or elaborate adventures. 

For both of you, these small moments spent together are the true thrill, and the love that blossoms in these shared experiences is more exhilarating than any roller coaster ride.

In that moment, as the world spun around you, you couldn’t help but feel an overwhelming sense of gratitude for having someone like Yoongi by your side. His willingness to step out of his comfort zone and embrace the joy of the moment, all for the sake of your happiness, touched you deeply.

You pulled him into more rides, your fingers laced together, creating a connection that transcended the dizzying whirl of lights and motion around you. It was a physical representation of the bond you shared—strong, unbreakable, and capable of weathering any twist or turn life might throw your way.

As the night continued, Yoongi’s gummy smile remained a constant source of warmth and reassurance. It was a silent promise that he would always be there, ready to share in your excitement, no matter how dizzy or disoriented it might make him feel. In this moment, beneath the vibrant carnival lights and amidst the laughter and thrills, you couldn’t help but wish for time to stand still. 

You wanted to savor every second of this shared experience, basking in the undeniable spark that had blossomed between you and Yoongi. It was a night you didn’t want to end, a night that held the promise of many more adventures together.

→ Author’s note(2): Thank you so much for reading! 🌸 I appreciate every like, comment and reblog, and please don’t be afraid to let me know what you think;  your kind words makes me extremely happy 💜 → Taglist: @idkjustlovingbts, @constancelayon, @wobblewobble822, @ktownshizzle, @moonchild1, @ultimatefangirl0, @baechugff, @jimintaemin, @parapiop7, @fckkntired, @iluvfndms, @citypop-princess, @tarahardcore, @bergandysam, @massivelyfullenthusiast *strikethrough means tumblr isn’t letting me tag you :(

← previous | s.masterlist | m.masterlist |  next →

[catcze]

#CATCZE — Writing and Edit Commissions !!

Thank you for giving me your attention! For commissions, I will be taking two kinds: writing commissions and in-game edit commissions. If you're at all interested in commissioning me for these, please proceed below ♡ If you can't commission me, then I would greatly appreciate you reblogging this post!

— Check below for availability, T&C,  prices & more !!

Current status (12/02) :

Writing Commissions: 0/3

In-game edit Commissions: 3/3 (Closed!)

Writing Commissions

To have an idea of what my usual work is like, my masterlist can be found here !

What I write :

Genshin Impact character x reader

Genshin Impact character x original character

Honkai Star Rail character x reader

Honkai Star Rail character x original character

I will also be accepting commissions for NSFW works !

Prices & Payment:

[SFW] 

Minimum of 100 words — 1 USD / 50php

For every +100 words you would like to add to the minimum word count, that is 1 USD / 50php. So 1k words = 10 USD. 2k words = 20 USD.

[NSFW]

Minimum of 100 words — 1.5 USD / 75php

For every +100 words you would like to add to the minimum word count, that is 1.5$ / 75php. 1k words = 15 USD. 2k words = 30 USD.

Note : If you would like your explicit content to come with some sfw scenes for build up, please tell me so we can negotiate! You can indicate a minimum word count for sfw scenes, as well as a minimum word count for explicit scenes so you can save some money !!

Note 2: After the final piece is sent, the client may request minor revisions. Major revisions, depending on how much is to be changed, may cost extra.

Methods of Payment:

Payment accepted via p.aypal or gcash.

After showing the client the initial draft (minimal editing, mostly only there to get a grasp for the plot/feel of the piece, is usually only 1/2 or 2/3 of the total word count) for suggestions and corrections, 50% of the total price should be sent for me to continue. 

Full payment is required only after I have confirmed that I have completed the commission.

Terms & Conditions:

Read my rules before you commission me. All do’s and do-not’s found in there apply here. 

I will not be taking commissions from blank blogs. Ageless blogs may not commission me for explicit works. 

Please have patience if you plan to commission me. Completion time varies according to details of the commission + my own personal circumstances. Expect about 2-14 days (or more).

I can send the final work to you, or post it on my tumblr. Whichever one works for you! You may repost it wherever you want (as long as it is for non-commercial use only) but you may not remove the byline ( ‘written by Catcze’ ). If you prefer that I don’t post it to my social media, please feel free to say so!

Feel free to ask for updates, but please try not to make them too frequent! (once a day is good enough :D)

Please be open to any questions I may have! I want to make this as best as I can for you, and sometimes I may need to ask for details or clarification.

If you have any ideas, scenes, dialogue, prompts or whatever that you would like me to use as inspiration for the work, please feel free to tell me! They can be super helpful in knowing what kind of vibe you’d like ♡

If you would like to commission me, please fill out this form!

In-Game Edit Commissions

Here is an example of a full body edit (left) and a half body / profile page edit (right) !

Prices & Payment:

Full body edit — 40 USD / 2000 php (base price)

Half body / profile page edit — 30USD / 1500 php (base price)

Note: Complex designs (wings, tail, large horns, detailed outfits, etc.)  may cost extra. Additionally, I will not be taking commissions for characters with full body armor, furries, or anything out of my ability.

Note 2: After the final piece is sent, the client may request minor revisions. Major revisions, depending on their severity, may cost extra.

Methods of Payment:

Payment accepted via p.aypal or gcash.

After showing the client the sketch for suggestions and corrections, 50% of the total price should be sent for me to continue. 

Full payment is required only after I have confirmed that I have completed the commission.

Terms & Conditions:

I will not be taking commissions from blank blogs.

Please have patience if you plan to commission me. Completion time varies according to details of the commission + my own personal circumstances. Expect about 10-20 days (or more) after the sketch has been approved.

I will send the final work to you via discord/email when I'm done! You may repost it wherever you want (as long as it is for non-commercial use only) as long as you remember to credit me wherever you use it. If you prefer that I don’t post it to my social media, please feel free to say so!

Feel free to ask for updates, but please try not to make them too frequent! (once a day is good enough :D)

Please be open to any questions I may have! I want to make this as best as I can for you, and sometimes I may need to ask for details or clarification.

If you have any ideas, references, inspirations, or whatever that you would like me to use, please feel free to tell me! They can be super helpful in knowing what kind of vibe you’d like ♡

If you would like to commission me, please fill out this form!

Thank you again for the interest ! Even if you can't commission me, please feel free to support me by reblogging this post ♡

[the-nosy-neighbor]

4 Eddies

So, as a commenter pointed out, there ARE 4 Eddie videos in Commercials, does that translate to 4 separate Eddies running around on Homewarming?

1. Decorating Poppy's tree. Eddie is happy to be helping her with the tree. The focus of the video is Eddie pouring gravy on the red ornament, which is referenced later in The Bad Time. Poppy asks Eddie when he is going to rest and enjoy the holiday. This really reminds me of something (a horror movie? People around them telling them they need rest and something is actually happening? They live? Soultaker? None of them are quite fitting but I know this is a trope.)

A line of Poppy's that sticks out to me is "when are you going to give yourself some time (pause) to enjoy the holidays?" It is a weird way to say that. “Give yourself some time.” Eddie has the only timepiece in the place. Edit: that is what i thought but now there is a cuckoo clock.

But. "What’s a Homewarmin’s eve without a Homewarmin’ Ham in the tree, after all!" So it is Homewarming Eve.

[Puppet]

2. Bored, but have Homewarming gifts to deal with. (He also notably has intrusive thoughts during this bit, which he talks himself down from.) He wraps an apple for Wally, which is slapping a bow on it. You know, he never gives people their gifts. We had him wrapping them, but they said later it was all done. He had his mail bag but he didn't say anything about distributing them, despite Sally saying they distributed all their presents. We have zero proof there are presents.

[Puppet]

3. Super bored, has played tic-tac-toe against himself at least 18 times, but it could be more with the 2nd page. The score is 4 to 14. It should be the other way, if we are reading left to right, as the 1st player to move has a much higher chance of winning. Or ties, since that is probably how playing yourself goes.  

He gets mad and shoves things around in this bit, and I have always found it odd that he says "how is anyone supposed to get some recognition around here if they don't have anything to do?" Acting primarily for recognition is weird--especially for a puppet. He seems kind of desperate, too, like the consequences of not having recognition are dire.  

He also has a shopping list: envelopes, pencil, construction paper, paper (lined), egg, milk. (I would say eggs, but he has a weird swoop at the end of all of his words.)

[Puppet]

4. Eddie goes for his walk, and immediately is spotted/called to by Sally, who says that everyone has already delivered their gifts without him so he could rest and enjoy the holiday and that he should walk her to the party.

[Cartoon/puppet mix]

Ok, what about this? Eddie is stashed away in the post office because the other Eddies are around and we can't have 2 at the same time? I really had this thought because we didn't get any info on the present delivery, and an alternate Eddie could have delivered it. Along the same lines, what if the Eddie that encounters Sally is not the same Eddie as was in the post office? He does decide to go for a walk in the end of 3. This could be one of those sitcom i have 3 dates and i can't let them know type deals.

But 1 happens on Homewarming Eve. 2 is on the holiday, "I ain’t never had so little to do on a holiday before." 3 says "all day," so we can assume the same day, but that isn't stated. Could we be seeing multiple years' Homewarmings? But Sally says he was there all day. 4 says Homewarming party, so maybe the same day.

Maybe we should consider the split between the Eve vs the Day?

What if Eddie knows there are 4 of him? Or at least 2 of him? Eddie 2 is wrapping presents. Then Eddie 2 and 3 are playing tic tac toe, with OG Eddie smoking Eddie 2, since copies tend to degrade in media. Then, finally, Eddie 4 is meeting up with Sally, because despite the fact that Eddie said he was going to go for a walk, we have no proof that he did so. Besides, this Eddie is a cartoon.

Eddie 1 could have delivered his presents? No, for this to make sense, Eddie 1, the highest functioning (and OG) Eddie does the Homewarming Eve, then we see Eddie 2 putting presents together. Then Eddie 2 goes and delivers his presents, while Eddie 1 and Eddie 3 play endless Tic-Tac-Toe. Maybe Eddie 1 goes shopping at that point, since we have a shopping list. Eddie 3, being a copy, is breaking down, getting mad about being useful, because that's all he is for, to be of use to Eddie 1, and by extension, the others. Eddie 4 gets scooped up by Sally, who may never realize that she is watching different iterations of Eddie throughout the day.

I wonder if through the other bits of Eddie there are any indications that he might be more than 1? We have that one concept drawing that sparked the idea--

Another concept drawing that fits:

There are multiple letters, multiple hearts, multiple versions of the word mail, and Eddie has a ? He has doki doki cheeks. Also, behind this drawing, we see a version of Eddie in some kind of distress. I can only really see the red face and pained look, as well as it looks like some movement of his arm. We can see the pocket of his shirt vaguely, but not sure what else is going on there.

In "commercials," we have layered sound and layered visuals. What if that layering represents multiple Eddies experiencing different things? Like the single pea and then saying 4, all the things he experienced as each version of himself played simultaneously. In this, I can see a wreath, Home's eye from this part, the Welcome home logo, all with Frank on top.

In line with the toy Eddie looking at his price, this Eddie sees himself dwarfed by toys. The realism involved in this presentation during a cartoon version of Eddie segment is jarring. Could he be having a realization about the degrees of realities his different personas have?

And as we can see it the detailed screens at the bottom of that image, we go pea on a plate, nightmare home, real/puppet version of pea on a plate, surrounded by giant toys, the clock, ornament, and gravy, which puts me in mind of Poppy:

And this--

this is definitely part of Eddie's realization, or derealization, I guess, depends on how you look at it. Under "Having a Get-Together?" it says "Consider inviting more peas to the party!" and "Add additional peas according to how many guests there are!" What if Eddie looks down and his thought is "that isn't enough peas for all of me." Especially possible considering that Eddie flashes back to this pea on a plate multiple times throughout his Bad Time.

I have considered before that the pea on a plate is important because it leads to Eddie considering being in two places, but what if it is important because he is think about how he's been in multiple places at the same time?

Puppet Eddie is at Home, and Cartoon Eddie is at the Post Office? Obviously, it would be backwards, because we know Cartoon Eddie is at Home. Maybe it is time to reconsider this idea?

We're hanging a lantern on this new monolith in the neighborhood? And/or, the letters mean something? F with the bug, that for sure references Frank. Also, kind of makes us think of Bug-A-Bye, and we've considered that is a representation of a kind of death for Eddie. In addition, that thumb is right on "J" and a present, so it could be Julie, or it could be presents, since they have figured in so strongly. The code we used this for does not include a J, so there isn't a present to be found on the website? (I have to go and check now.) I didn't see any.

I went off and got distracted, as usual, but nothing else to report. This is an interesting idea. Next, I will either be doing mythology or mentions of "time," especially in reference to Eddie.

[siobhanbooks]

2024 Fic Writer End of Year Roundup

Answer and then tag three or more creators to keep the game going! Thank you to @yanny_77 for the tag! If you're tagged her, feel free to answer!! <333

How many words did you publish on AO3 in 2024?

187,571 with 176,948 in Empyrean fics

2. How many fics did you complete this year?

21 - that's more than a whole page on ao3!

3. How many in progress or ongoing fics did you start this year?

5! (with a lot of fics still solely hanging out in my google docs lol)

4. What was your favorite thing you wrote?

'tis the damn season. I spent so much time researching all the American parts of it, it was so heavily beta'd and edited to make sure that side all made sense. It wasn't supposed to be that long but somehow it ended up as my longest oneshot. I started and finished it at a time when I was feeling a lot like Imogen does in the fic and it really helped to get my feelings out that way. special thank you for @essjaywrites for giving me the word homestuckness. it's the fic that shows my writing off the best in my opinion and shows just how much I've changed as a writer since May alone.

I put my whole heart into this fic. If you only read one thing I wrote this year, let it be this.

5. What piece was your most experimental or different from your usual style?

nothing really sticks out beside everything because this is my first year posting omg

'tis the damn season because it was my first 1st person smut

Nakey & Bakey because it was my most out there smut (in my opinion) - thank you @yanny-77 for that prompt and @greeneyedwildthing for everything you did to help me with it including giving it to me!

6. Did any fics surprise you - either while writing or their reception?

Amari save me got pretty dark and 'tis the damn season got pretty long but I don't think anything else to be honest

7. Do you have a fic you wrote and loved that went under the radar? (This is your sign to reblog/repost it!)

Amari save me - this is the saddest thing I wrote ever and not enough people have read it!!! please go read it!!!

8. Who is an artist that inspired you?

@essjaywrites internet mum and all round amazing person (also her writing is so inspiring as well)

9. Who is an author that inspired you?

there literally so many people that I can't tag you all so to cover, literally everyone over on the RQ discord server, you're all amazing!!

special mentions to @alexandia03 my other internet mum who is just so amazing and wonderful and talented, @yanny_77 who introduced me to bodoc, @ubiquitously_me who introduced me to bodhiam, @hockeyspiral23 who introduced me to bodociam, as well as my beta's: alex, sarah, @TeganTales, @saracasticmothwrites, and @copperfirebird.

10. Who is a new author you discovered?

everyone? I only read FW and IF this year (in April omg) so I actually don't know who to put here people I haven't mentioned yet - @softodettes love you loads

11. Did you do any collaborations? How did it start?

not posted…I have one in the drafts with @TeganTales which started from idea bouncing and my WIP ban meaning I couldn't start it on my own lol

12. What accomplishments are you proudest of?

like daylight having over 50k words is pretty damn impressive, but to be honest it's not about the numbers, it's more about the people I've met and the friendships I've formed this year

13. What did you learn about writing or creating this year?

that I can do it and i'm actually good at it!!

14. What is your advice?

Go for it!! Someone out there will read it and you never know…maybe someone adopts you - looking at @alexandia03 and @essjaywrites lol

15. What are your creative goals for 2025?

finish all of my WIPs apart from LD because that's got a lot to go lol

write some of my imrrick ideas

write that fic with Tegan

but mostly keep going!!

(yes technically it's 2025 for me but who cares - love you all)

[needlesandnilbogs]

To Show Patience With: The Character of Overse in Martha Wells's Murderbot

Overse is not a name. As it's spelled, it's a Norwegian or Danish verb that means "overlook," or it can be spelled "överse" and be a Swedish word meaning "overlook" as well. My friend, a fluent Swedish speaker, said she'd understand the meaning if she saw the word "överse" used, but she wouldn't pick that word to translate from English to Swedish.

However, the language authority for Sweden, the Swedish Academy, gives an alternate meaning to the verb "överse"; it can mean to overlook, to critically go through/to review, or to show patience with. Their example of that last meaning is "han över­såg med barnens slarv," which my friend and Google Translate both say means something along the lines of "he overlooked the carelessness of the children."

I feel at this point I should quote this friend: "The funky thing about Swedish is that it's a very word-poor language, so one word can mean a lot of different things depending on context."

Martha Wells is a pantser, she's admitted to it. I'm sure she didn't intend that last meaning. But what if she did?

Our first introduction to Overse is on page 14 of All Systems Red (all page numbers are from hardback editions), where we get "I carried Bharadwaj up the ramp into the cabin, where Overse and Ratthi were frantically unclipping seats [...] their horrified expressions when they took in what was left of my upper body through my torn suit" (All Systems Red 14). Not very patient yet, given the description that the words "frantically" and "horrified" imply. But a few pages later, Overse and Arada have stabilized Bharadwaj by the end of the ride, and in the end of the chapter she's presumably among the group worrying in the mess. Soon after, when MB announces that there's a deleted part of the hazard report, it notes that "The reaction to that in general was pretty pissed off. There were some loud complaints from Pin-Lee and Overse and dramatic throwing-hands-in-the-air from Ratthi" (ASR 29). In a traumatic situation, it's understandable that everyone is a little panicked and nobody's being patient, but Overse seems to be able to work, even when she's upset by the situation.

By the time they're thinking about going to DeltFall, we have a little more info about Overse. Arada asks about recharging at DeltFall and "Overse put an arm around her and squeezed her shoulder" before explaining (ASR 47). MB even notes that "As a couple, they were always so nice to each other" (ASR 47). Arada is a little naive about the Corporate Rim, as evidenced by her questions here, the "terminal optimist" line in Network Effect, and just everything else. Overse, however, knows what's going on, and moreover, the combination of action and words, plus MB's statement that they are "nice" to each other, combines to create a patient tone when she's explaining.

During the rest of the book, Overse mostly shows up in the group scenes, in which she's a voice for reason, if just as worried as the rest of them. She appears briefly at the end of Exit Strategy, but not for long. When she really becomes a force of patience is in Network Effect.

In the first chapter, she "would be upset if I let her marital partner get killed" and "had shouted" at MB on the comm before that (Network Effect 11-12). However, she remains calm enough to warn Ratthi to get off the comm with the raiders and prepare the facility for launch, even through her worry. Shortly after, she notes to MB that it's been really supportive of Arada and how helpful that's been, and it notes that "[Arada] and Overse had always been firmly in the 'least likely to abandon a SecUnit to a lonely horrible fate' category, which was always the category I was most interested in" (NE 40). From it, that's an impressive compliment and a sign of Overse's ability to remain calm enough to make kind decisions while under immense stress.

This is born out a few pages later when Overse and Ratthi are in the control deck during the attack on the baseship and facility. "Both looked frantic," MB says, but it also notes that "frantic was the right reaction" and that there's no comm or feed (NE 43). Immediately afterward, Arada arrives, and "Overse's face twisted with relief and she bit her lip hard" (NE 44). After knowing that her wife is safe, Overse is more able to handle the situation. She gets comm partially active another page later, handles evacuation and separation well (though she and Arada both let their protectiveness for each other and the rest of the crew override their self-preservation instincts), and comes up with the idea of getting MB and Amena into EVAC suits as well as helping "cannibalize four of the EVAC suits aboard" to stabilize the safepod (NE 135).

Once removed from the immediate stress of almost dying, Overse demonstrates the ability to control her initial reactions (she "grimaced and rubbed her eyes" at ART's declaration that it won't leave till it gets what it wants, then communicates silently with Arada) and handles ART's demands with patience (NE 140). For instance, ART says it didn't plan to attack the facility, and she responds, "But it was your idea," with narrowed eyes (NE 141). I hate to make a personal anecdote in an analytical essay, but this is exactly the attitude my mother takes when I do something and she's trying to be patient but also communicate that I did a stupid. Same thing with their next group conversation with ART, where MB notes that she has a "'let's get this over with' expression," and when they first discuss the colony, where "Her expression had that grimly frustrated quality that was common when my humans talked about the corporates" (NE 149, 155). (What I'm saying is Overse is the mom friend lol)

There are two scenes later in NE that are especially telling. The first is in chapter 10, when Overse and Arada are on the way to check out engineering.

Arada and Overse had stopped in the corridor that went toward the engineering module. Arada hugged Overse, and Overse kissed her and said into her ear, "You can do this, babe. You're a bulkhead." "I'm a wibbly bulkhead," Arada muttered. (The wibbliness was why I trusted Arada. Overconfident humans who don't listen to anybody else scare the hell out of me.) Arada stepped back and smiled at Overse. "Got to get to work." (NE 164)

In this scene, Arada is worried; she's finally letting down the mask of command and letting Overse see how worried she is in a situation that is close to private. Overse responds in a manner consistent with the mention in ASR that they were always nice to each other, but she's more than just nice. Arada is upset in a way that's likely troubling to Overse, and Overse is able to calm her, be patient with her, and make sure that she's okay despite being worried about her.

The other scene in question is the infamous bunkroom scene, which deserves a whole separate meta about what's been told and what's left missing, but the simple summary is thus: in chapter 11, Arada agrees to go over to the Barish-Estranza ship, without consulting anyone else or making an informed decision. From then on, Overse is upset. Her initial response to the idea is "Fuck no," then "there was a big human argument" and "Overse said through gritted teeth, 'Rescuing you–or trying to recover your body–will not save us time'"(NE 202-03). A few minutes later, "Overse was still mad," and apparently needs "a chance to vent and calm down," which she gets by venting to Ratthi (NE 204). MB paraphrases, so we'll never know her exact words, but she apparently ends up "being angry at herself for getting angry at Arada during a crisis" (NE 205). She's able to calm herself down and be patient long enough to work with Arada, but it takes until the next chapter for MB to notice their relationship improving. The infamous bunkroom scene is really only a few lines:

Arada and Overse were back to getting along after spending time together in an unused bunkroom while we were traveling to the dock. I hadn't bothered to monitor them on ART's cameras or try to slip a drone in; the chances that they were having sex and/or a relationship discussion (either of which I would prefer to stab myself in the face than see) were far higher than the chance that they were saying anything I needed to know about. (I mean they might have been plotting against me, but you know, probably not.) (NE 230)

What's amazing is how much is communicated in the absence of any detail on what actually happened. Overse isn't mad anymore, not necessarily because there's a way to go back or to make it better (though they do seem to have negotiated a compromise about the next stressful situation), but because she's able to look past the situation and recognize that the best way to get back to a normal relationship with her marital partner is to overlook what happened.

To overlook. It can be a very easy thing to do, to overlook and ignore someone with a smaller role, such as Overse. To oversee something, to manage a whole bunch of things and ensure all of it goes correctly. But "överse" is also to be patient with, or to overlook flaws. And that is the core of Overse's character: she is the Patient One.

Not to say that I believe in nominative determinism, the idea that people gravitate towards work that match their name (Wikipedia). Martha Wells is a known pantser, and I doubt that this was a deliberate choice on her part. But she had to have a reason to choose the name Overse, even if that was just that it was on a list of words she liked. I want to imagine that the reason is that she knew she'd made a patient character and picked a name that secretly describes a patient person.

Sources:

"Nominative Determinism." Wikipedia, 25 Apr. 2024. Wikipedia, https://en.wikipedia.org/w/index.php?title=Nominative_determinism&oldid=1220754650. Accessed May 31, 2024.

överse | SAOL | svenska.se. https://svenska.se/saol/?hv=lnr114060. Accessed May 14, 2024.

Wells, Martha, and Martha Wells. All Systems Red. First edition, Tom Doherty Associates, 2017.

---. Network Effect. First edition, Tom Doherty Associates, 2020.

[thisweekingundamwing]

This Week in Gundam Wing 7-19 October 2024

Here’s the roundup for October 7th - October 19th, 2024!

Remember to give your content creators some love! Be sure to join in on the events at the bottom! And remember to send in any new works you see or make this next week!

~Mod Hel

Fanfiction/Ideas/Snippets:

@bryony-rebb

https://www.tumblr.com/bryony-rebb/764587335635599360/dragging-myself-kicking-and-screaming-back-to-my

*dragging myself kicking and screaming back to my word document after one million years*

"Maybe we should try to delay our departure by a few days? With the right shuttle we could still catch up with the main fleet."

@duointherain

Apex Predators https://www.tumblr.com/duointherain/763789949468278784/fic-apex-predators-11

Note: Smelting temp for aluminum is 800 degrees. My roommates will not let me do this in the kitchen.

Quatre arched an eyebrow, looked down at the little individual hand blender next to his plate, then back up at Duo. “You made these mixers from aluminum you found on the beach, the streets?”

@miyurinq

3 x 4 Drabbles https://archiveofourown.org/works/59356291/chapters/151381402?hide_banner=true

M/M, Trowa Barton/Quatre Raberba Winner

Not Rated, Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings, Torokatober2024, Trowa x Quatre - Freeform, Melancholy, Fluff, cute stuff, little drama here and there, English

a collection of drabbles for the Torokatober 2024 (Tumblr)

@ms-miserable-misery

https://www.tumblr.com/ms-miserable-misery/763607680110706689/day-6-im-not-giving-up

Day 6 - “I’m not giving up”

https://www.tumblr.com/ms-miserable-misery/763714563950690304/day-7-follow-me-if-you-want-to-live

Day 7 - “follow me if you want to live”

https://www.tumblr.com/ms-miserable-misery/763796881996398592/day-8-are-we-happy

Day 8 - “are we happy?”

https://www.tumblr.com/ms-miserable-misery/764091894482468864/day-11-well-that-worked-out-great

Day 11 - “well, that worked out great”

https://www.tumblr.com/ms-miserable-misery/764155181613170688/day-12-did-you-hear-that

Day 12 - “did you hear that?”

https://www.tumblr.com/ms-miserable-misery/764316843572969472/day-14-did-you-stick-to-the-plan

Day 14 - “did you stick to the plan?”

https://www.tumblr.com/ms-miserable-misery/764404078871773184/day-15-lets-try-this

Day 15 - “let’s try this”

https://www.tumblr.com/ms-miserable-misery/764497112231788544/day-16-no-im-not-okay

Day 16 - “no, I’m not okay”

https://www.tumblr.com/ms-miserable-misery/764589228684460032/day-17-strangest-thing-i-ever-heard

Day 17 - “strangest thing I ever heard”

Arts/Crafts/Photo Manips:

@alphamecha-mkii

https://www.tumblr.com/alphamecha-mkii/763722028479119360/deathscythe-hell-custom-by-amasaki-yusuke

Deathscythe Hell Custom by Amasaki Yusuke, fanart

@hyper-girlcrush

https://www.tumblr.com/hyper-girlcrush/764107565058719744/trowa-based-on-endless-waltz

Trowa Barton, fanart

@siodam

https://www.tumblr.com/siodam/764586285623066624

Heero/Relena, fanart

Photosets/Gifsets/Screenshots/Manga Pages:

@janaverse

https://www.tumblr.com/janaverse/763820192832815104/more-sheepish-duo-i-have-never-seen-heero-do

Duo/Heero, Sims, screenshot

https://www.tumblr.com/janaverse/764185464732303360/duo-in-spandex

Duo Maxwell, Sims, screenshot

https://www.tumblr.com/janaverse/764688856747524096/there-is-no-universe-where-wolf-nap-will-not-be

Heero, Duo, Sims, screenshot

https://www.tumblr.com/janaverse/764742385918001152/sneaky-i-am-sure-duo-would-let-him-play-with

Heero/Duo, Sims, screenshot

@therosecrest

https://www.tumblr.com/therosecrest/763872322771894272

Iria Winner, gif

Head Canons/Meta:

@a-river-of-stars

https://a-river-of-stars.tumblr.com/post/763718344427847680/

Gundam Wing supports your right to leave behind your deadname

https://a-river-of-stars.tumblr.com/post/763721062511984640/

Live-action Gundam Wing characters as headcanoned by a-river-of-stars (AI images generated through text prompts and edited in GIMP)

Fandom Discourse:

@emiliabeville

https://www.tumblr.com/emiliabeville/764006239523028993/seriously-struggling-to-get-through-gundam

Relena, official art

I hope you can get through it! It’s a wild ride. ^_^

Calendar Events:

@gwcocktailfriday

Cocktail Fridays!

Post responses on Friday, during Happy Hour between 3 & 5 pm in your own timezone.

Here’s the prompts for Friday, October 25th: https://gwcocktailfriday.tumblr.com/post/764767710938808320/cocktail-friday-post-responses-on-friday-october

In need of prompts!

@gwoc-october

Prompt List 2024: https://www.tumblr.com/gwoc-october/763150907755134976/gw-oc-october-is-back-going-a-bit-more-generic

@thisweekingundamevents

Events Calendar https://thisweekingundamevents.tumblr.com/post/730188053636841472/updated-events-calendar

If you are hosting an event currently, or are planning on one, hit us up with links and dates! We’ll add them to the Calendar and reblog your notices to get the word out!

GW Holiday Gift Exchange 2024

Assignments Sent out! Check your emails: https://thisweekingundamevents.tumblr.com/post/763976851818512384/all-gw-holiday-gift-exchange-assignments-have-been

GW Hallows 2024

https://thisweekingundamevents.tumblr.com/post/763151583438618625/gw-hallows-2024

[amelias-zelda-calamity-quintet]

More Writing Advice - MoaH Edition

I got an message (thank you @doubtfulloser) asking for more writing advice, and I figured I'd try to get some more thoughts on the page. Right now I'm not entirely sure what else to add to my current list as more tangible advice, so I'm going to try instead to summarize the energy I try to get with Mark of a Hero, my current ongoing writing project. This is honestly going to be a little funky to word, so bear with me as I try to capture a vibe. This is also mostly about fanfic, but I've applied similar processes to my original works as well. Again, this is what works for me, but I hope it helps.

MoaH is very roughly outlined for the whole series. I know where the books need to go on three different levels: act arc, book arc, and series arc. Some of these are like. Three bullet points long, but it helps give me a trajectory. It helps too that in writing this specific type of fic (Legend of Zelda original legend/AU/there's no fandom name for this yet), I can benchmark the books by dungeons. Each book of MoaH has an introduction arc, at least three "shrine" arcs, a bonus dungeon arc, and a full dungeon arc. Those can be moved around, mostly, into the order they need to be to keep the books a little more varied. That's also a very pulled back way to look at it, but it definitely can help imagine a five act structure that way.

Also, don't worry as much about stories seeming formulaic. If someone knows there's a formula in storytelling, they'll find it. And in telling a story, you're going to see behind the curtains the most. Of course you will see a formula. But if MoaH is an example of anything, it's that playing with that formula can be part of the story itself too. The story sets up very clearly that Link in MoaH is in fact the Hero. But to everyone in the story, they don't know that. And MoaH plays a lot with expectation. Because the reader has expectations from the series, the characters have expectations from living in the world, and there's still the story being told because the premise of the characters being adults at the start of the story already skews expectation (this is why outfits have a huge role narratively as much as mechanically too).

And, if my other major fic, Goddess of Secrecy, taught me anything, it's that as long as the formula is fun (there were 14 dungeons in that one and people stuck through it), who cares? Sometimes a routine can be comfortable. And there's plenty of storytelling out there. You can be the comfort part of it and let other people write the mindblowing formula breaking stuff. (This will also get me into a tangent on accessibility in fantasy but we need more base expectation media too, particularly for adults to get them back into reading.)

But that was a lot more actual writing advice than I thought I'd get so I need to get back to what I said I'd actually talk about and that's vibes. Generally in writing MoaH, I'm trying to capture the energy of Zelda as close to Nintendo as I can. It's the biggest compliments I've gotten that have told me I've managed that in my stories. It's also the hardest to describe, so I'll try to outline the thought process my story beats go through to make sure they reach that vibe:

First, would Nintendo do it? In general, in any of their franchises, would they tell this kind of story? Usually this forces curbing the level of "maturity" of the story (Nintendo has never gone passed rated M), but it means relying on environmental storytelling and implication in exchange. This is the biggest cutoff of them all, but it also means figuring out ways to be more original with the ideas, and usually leads to better stories. To that point, Nintendo has also been a company that has used ever last bit of their tech to make good games, despite limitations. This moderation strives to do the same.

Second, is it fun? If we want to capture the energy of Zelda, even if it's going to include timeline junk, the core of Nintendo's philosophy has always been "make good game first, good story second." Writing an original Zelda novel then needs to have a similar approach. Is the plot focused on the spirit of exploration first and the enjoyment from exploring that world that the games have or on the larger narrative stuff I'm trying to do? How do we balance that better?

Third, how would it play out in a game? This is harder for MoaH because I don't think it could be a game ever. Not because the mechanics aren't there but because of scale (there are 9 countries). Still, in general application, how would the mechanics of MoaH play out. Using RPGs (western and Japanese) as well as TTRPGs like D&D to track power scaling helps a lot with this. The abilities should never be one to one, but as a reference point, this can help. It can also double back into the previous point, would this be a fun section of a game to play? If not, how do I fix that? It's also important on this point to remember how game plots and book plots are differently driven. Game plots can be paced by the player, book plots have to be paced by the author.

Fourth, honestly, can I picture this happening in an anime? Not to be an absolute massive weeb, but genuinely. Having not read Journey to the West (yet), capturing the energy of Zelda storytelling requires looking at Japanese storytelling. And my closest point of entry on that is anime. On what those stories focus on. And the basis of storytelling in Japan, like the Odyssey is in the west, is Journey to the West. From the Sparksnotes version of that I have, that's a higher emphasis on character(s) and interpersonal growth over the journey itself. There are still obstacles (dungeons) that will result in a journey, but the interactions on your three-to-five-man-band are way more central. This is, again, where RPGs can be good reference points. And it's why MoaH always has multiple named characters in the scene as often as it can.

Finally, maybe surprisingly to be last, does it fit Zelda? I mean lorewise generally with this, mostly because, Nintendo does not care about the lore connections between their games. While the timeline is fun to mess with, it should always be secondary to the narrative being built so that the games can be standalone. MoaH can be standalone, even though it has lore connecting it to my other big fic, GoS, and the timeline. The legends have always been loosely strung together. If it can incorporate the lore of another game, fantastic. But it is always the last concern because lore connections have never been the goal between Zelda games. And it's not the goal with MoaH. And to that point, as a narrative element within MoaH, there is reason to believe that in canon, that lore loss is due to time. How stories change over it, how they get recorded, how they get retold, how they become legends over history.

As a last half point to the previous but that paragraph was massive already, is this relying on a Zelda trope as a crutch or does it add to the story? It's very easy to namedrop a character. It's another thing to make them feel like that character in game. I can call my main duo Link and Zelda all I want. Do they feel like them? How are they still original to their plots? I think with MoaH a lot of folks will get thrown off on this one because it starts rivals to lovers. Zelda hates Link (he did also break into a temple and she currently sees him as a criminal). That's kinda antithetical to their whole eternal love story though. So why? Spoilers, mostly. But a huge part of Zelda's personality is following through with how Nintendo characterized her and how I see her growing up as an adult. Personally, I don't know a spirited, politically conscious, highly empathic femme who didn't grow up to be an angry (justified), politically active, still highly empathic adult. Of course she would be mad at Link for a flagrant disregard for the law and disrespect to a holy cultural site for self-imposed vigilantism. There are laws that need to be fixed, but there are systems to fix them (this is also a chaotic good x lawful good relationship).

There is probably a lot more I could break down on MoaH and its structure but it would inevitably give away the entire books and all the major themes. For now, I think that's all I can say (and this is already a lot), but I'll try to circle back on these points after one of the books is all the way out.

I guess, if anything else, read everything. Genres you like, genres you don't, traditional publications, self publications, fanfic, the gambit. If the goal of art studies is to improve your art, then reading is the closest comparison we have for writing. And also, it's ok to be kinda bad at something. That's where we all start. It's ok to be pop fiction, there's a reason it's popular. The more hoops you add to yourself about how original or stylized a story should be or the kind of reputation it's going to have, the more you're going to get in your own head about whether or not you can tell the story. Someone will always find a way to be judgemental. Don't let that someone be you.

[romanarose]

WHAT DO?!?

1. Rule number 14 of the internet. Don’t feed the trolls

I have just caught up on all 85 episodes of the Chris Chan documentary and my biggest take away was DONT!!! FEED!!! TROLLS!!! I struggle with this one. When I get rude asks I always want to respond especially if they say something fucking stupid… The ones I respond to are probably only 1/3 of the shit that I get. A lot of times they just want a rise out of us to not give them that. Sending to people or to certain confession pages even if they are nice just feed those trolls and give them fuel to the fire..

2. Does the person attacked want you to say something?

When I was attacked in April, I absolutely appreciated the people coming to my defense, especially sharing alternate viewpoint, especially in the beginning. However, after a day or two, I just wanted it to stop. Relogging post about a person in arguing just serves to give everything traction and arguing, just means we get to read more mean stuff about ourselves. Consider the author first. I am guilty of this where I want to publicly jump to my friend defenses when they are hurting but I have to consider is this being done for them, or to quell my own feelings.

3. Is the person saying the thing your friend or mutual?

Consider dming them. Especially if it’s a mater if something being factually incorrect. we all have been victims of misinformation at one point in time and I have believed things that were false about others so I appreciate a private correction. If it is a matter of opinion, it may be harder, like debate on if dark fiction is valid. However, keeping it private is best .

4. Consider the size of the issue.

Are dozens and dozens of blogs talking about it? If so, maybe your voice isn’t needed and you could reblog posts or dm support. Maybe you have a viewpoint that is helpful. Is it one small blog with 2 notes saying it? It’s probably best to move on and let it die.

Again, consider the person being victimized.

For me, the outpouring of love and public posts meant the world to me. Especially seeing blogs I followed but weren’t mutuals with or blogs I didn’t know at all come to my defense, but that’s me as a person. And that was just at the start. When I realized the fucking scale of what was happening I just wanted to stop.

I’m learning other people don’t always want support the way we want, kinda like love languages.

So, what can you do?

DO

Dm or send an ask depending how well you know them.

DONT

Be upset they don’t respond. They are likely receiving a lot of messages and although they certainly appreciate kind words, these sorts of things can be very draining and they might not have the mental energy to respond.

DO

Continue to support their works with comments reblogs, fanart or fiction or funny edits. Something not related to drama that shows you love them and publically support them.

DONT

Make the comment or whatever related ti the drama or mention it in anyway the Creator does not want to look back on the nice things overtime and be reminded of the bad things

DONT tell people every little thing being said!

I 💯 appreciated those who notified me something was said and it was BAD bc it’s a blog I never would have seen and it warranted being notified. However, if someone was sending me screenshots of every reblog and comment I’d be upset. Once the person is aware of an issue, unless asked to get info please don’t.

Feel free to add more to this! This is just what I’ve learned from my own experience and from listening to others.

I know this is a very trying time for the fandom if you need to leave or step back 100% support you. This is not fun for you anymore then you gotta do what’s best for yourself



[many-gay-magpies]

Hi it's Quill! ❤️ You said you love to talk about writing, I'd love to hear some of it, so here it is: can you please answer 13, 14, 27, 63 and 64? AND as a bonus (if you want), answer the question you really wanted someone to ask you when you saw the list 😜

hi hi @shadowquill17, thank you sm for asking!! I am glad you would love to hear because I have written. A Lot. thank you for giving me license to yap lmao

13. what’s a common writing tip that you almost always follow?

more and more lately, I've been following the advice of "write the scenes in the order you want to write them, you can connect the dots later"- it just makes for such an easy flow as opposed to trying to write everything in perfect chronological order to get to the scenes you really want to write, because often by the time you GET to those scenes you're worn out by trudging through the writing in-between, or the words have fled from your brain. and oftentimes I end up majorly rewriting those scenes I wrote early on to make them fit with the stuff I wrote after, but like, it's such a relief to just. get the words on the page (or screen, technically). and now im realising that this tip may not exactly be COMMON but it's one I follow a lot kshdfkhsdfkh

14. how do you write emotional scenes? Do you ever feel what the characters feel? Do you draw from personal experiences?

I mean, I don't know that the writing of emotional scenes is something I really consciously think about? like. any scene that has characters in it is going to have emotions in it. because I am writing people, and people are feeling emotions. pretty much all the time. but I get that this question more means, like, big breakdowns or emotional climaxes or cathartic moments, so- I don't know? I don't know that I feel what the characters feel (although sometimes yeah probably); it's more that I just imagine how THEY would feel and act in the situation, based on how they've acted in the canon material and whatnot. for some things I have drawn on personal experience, like the description of Edwin's touch starvation in to a grave dug for fear is VERY drawn from my own physical feelings in similar situations, especially the "grip around his heart like a scream about to burst" description of the hug at the end. but mostly yeah I just, like, envision the scene in my head as if I was watching it as a scene on TV and then write it. writing emotion and emotional scenes is very well-practiced/comes very naturally to me, so it's not really something I think about anymore skhdfkshdfkh

27. What is your most and least favorite part of writing?

ooooh lemme think. I think most favorite: right when you have a fresh new idea and you're just on a ROLL writing it, everything's coming out so smooth and perfect and you feel so INSPIRED and so happy with how good it is/is gonna be. that's my favorite and then my LEAST favorite is that stage of editing where you've been looking at a piece so long that you start to hate it, and now phrasings and bits of dialogue you started out loving look weird and clunky, and oh lord why has no one ever told you you use this many semicolons??? that's too many semicolons. cool it with the semicolons. and the em dashes as well. coming back with an edit because I remembered another least favorite part (which really pertains more to the ABSENCE of writing): that specific mood where you have an idea that you know would be really really cool to write, you have the plot and character dynamics and arc and everything perfectly envisioned and you know it would be SO SO GOOD... but the actual spark of motivation that makes you want to write the thing just is not there. it's always like UGHHHHH IM SO SORRY I CANT DO YOU JUSTICE, YOU WOULD BE SO GOOD IF I ACTUALLY WANTED TO WRITE YOU TT. but instead it sits there and rots. I despise this

63. Something you hate to see in smut.

I don't know if it's an outright HATE, and I can push through it sometimes if the rest of the smut is more or less enjoyable, but like. I strongly dislike when there is not clear, explicit, enthusiastic consent established throughout the scene- like, if a character just DOES SOMETHING without asking first, or just saying like "can I try something?", and waiting to get their partner's agreement before proceeding. oftentimes I see this happen in fics with a dom/sub dynamic where the just-going-for-it-without-asking is written into the general commanding-ness of the dominant person in the relationship, which is just. eugh, no thanks. I think DBDA fic in particular has diminished my tolerance for lack of explicit verbal consent because so many DBDA smut fics have SUCH prominent and fantastic consent established. also when characters in a d/s dynamic are made to do or say things that are just completely out of character (imo) in the name of pushing that dynamic further

64. Something you love to see in smut.

Conversely, of course, I love seeing explicit and enthusiastic consent in smut, ESPECIALLY when someone asking "can I try something" "can I touch you" "is this okay" "do you want to stop" etc etc is answered with "anything" "do NOT stop" or just straight-up begging. like. such a lovely lovely way of confirming consent while maintaining the mood >> (although consent doesn't BREAK the mood anyway). or like, when a character does something on accident, the other character reacts with a gasp or a loud noise or whatever, and the first character is like "oh no did I hurt you??" and the second character (who was really into it) is like "FUCK NO DO THAT AGAIN" In the interest of giving a different answer tho, some other stuff I love in smut is dynamics where a character that hasn't gotten to let go or be vulnerable in this way really ever is given the space to do that, and even ENCOURAGED to... where someone who thinks they aren't good enough or don't deserve this gets assured irrevocably that they ARE and they DO through sex... cough cough sub Charles fics cough cough-- yeah generally just. some good home-grown life-affirming smut. thumbs up emoji also desperation/lack of composure/greed/intense unrestrained desire/want bordering on hunger is hot. especially characters that have been composed/trying to hold back before just fucking losing it. but I think that's kinda the name of the game with a lot of smut

hope you enjoyed this essay lmao

[hergrandplan]

Hey Nina 💜,

1,4,5, 14 and 17 for the writers ask thingie

Gladly!!

The last sentence you wrote

Simon wishes he could do more for W., help him somehow. Refer him to another publisher, one who would see what he sees. But Simon doesn’t have those kind of connections.

Okay technically these are three sentences but otherwise it wouldn't make sense i hope you don't mind lol

4. A story idea you haven't written yet

Oh, I have many (too many, some would say) but I once had an idea where Party Prince Wille gets into big big trouble one night. He gets way too drunk at a club, and even gets photographed leaving with someone. The next morning, his mother shows him images of him leaving with none other than Simon Eriksson, Sweden's Sweetheart, hand fully on his ass in a definitely-not-friendly way. His mother is done with him ruining the image of the monarchy with all his fooling around. In order to straighten out his image, Wille and Simon have to pretend they're actually dating...

I'm not explaining this well but it's fun and messy I promise

5. First sentence of the fifth paragraph of an unpublished WIP

"Plus, what right did they have to be there?"

14. Where do you get your inspiration?

I want to give the poetic answer and say shit like. All around me, the world, people on the train, but that's bullshit.

I get my inspiration from songs, a good 99% of the time (I stan very lyrical artists and that makes it so so easy)

17. Talk about your writing and editing process

Ooooh okay. Love this question!

Once I have an idea, like when that first flash hits me, I start writing immediately. Doesn't matter where I am; at home or at work or, once, literally walking the streets of New York. Cause once I have that idea, I usually at least have one or two fully fleshed out scenes in my head that I have to get out before I lose them.

After that, I usually let the stories marinate and sit and focus on other projects that are in a further stage of development. It's rare that I immediately write a whole story; editorial au really is the exception to anything really.

After that, I just pick up the story whenever I feel like it, but the beginning of writing is very much snippets in my notes, little random thoughts that hit me throughout the day.

When I sit down to write, depending on how fueled I am, I either write like 5k words in one go or 5. I try not to be too hard to myself during the writing stage; it doens't need to be good then (it really doesn't need to be good ever, but hey) it just needs to be Something. Words on a page. Any thoughts I have about the scene. Any time I get stuck, I write in a bracket what I want to do and move on. If I think about what I'm stuck on for too long I get stuck in writing and lose all motivation. It happens once or twice that I also don't have any ideas on what's supposed to happen after the scene I'm stuck on, but yeah, usually brackets.

I also talk to myself in the comments. If I'm hit with an idea about something I wrote earlier, the most I'll do is put a comment there about that idea, and go back to where I left off.

Sometimes I'll ask friends on opinions; discuss scenes or whether something a character does is actually in character. Talking really helps in working through hurdles, more so than I initially thought it would.

Often times when writing I think of my writing as too flat, but that's okay, because: editing is where I shine.

Now, given my profession this shouldn't have surprised me but I mean it that my best work is done in editing. That's where I get the sentences to flow, the pacing to work. I'll rewrite whole sections, and maybe it can seem like a waste of time, but those rewritings wouldn't be as good if there wasn't something that came before them. I take my time editing, making sure everything works, and then I send it off to my beta reader who reads it, works out those final kinks with me and then it's off to ao3!

(this all means it does take me ages to publish a story so thank you to everyone who's so patient with me lol)

Send me fic writer asks!

[dadfuckerfest]

Look what we found in Dad’s journal!

Weird.

Anyway, the Man writes like Yoda, but here is what we figured out:

1. What the fuck is a “Dadfucker Fest”?

It’s a weekend dedicated to the “fucking” part of Dadfucking.

2. How can someone contribute to this most wonderful and noble cause?

Give us porn! Remember, Dad wasn’t exactly a monk, and Dean gave him everything he’s ever had. All you have to do is write (or draw or edit) some dadsex and mention @dadfuckerfest and/or tag #dadfuckerfest (mentions are preferred, for consistency and notifications). We’ll reblog it to this page to share with your fellow dadfuckers and to save for posterity!

3. Wait, is it just John/Dean? What about [other canon/original character]?

Characters and ships other than John/Dean are most welcome! However, your work still has to be about J/D to some degree. This means threesomes, gangbangs, third-party POVs, role-play, J/D by-proxy, unrequited fantasies are a-okay. You can find some examples here. If you’re still unsure if something is allowed, feel free to ask for clarification. (Though to be honest, we’re not very picky over here.)

4.When is this dadsex going down?

When is it not going down?! Feel free to start working on your daddycestuous fic/art and sharing it as soon as you like. However, works will be reblogged to this blog on Friday, July 28th through Sunday, July 30th.

5. What’s with the day-by-day break-down?

Think of the day-by-day break-down as our reblog calendar, to help us categorize your works. Or if you like, think of them as very optional, not-at-all-serious “themes.” They are as follows: * Friday July 28th: (Pre-)Canon — i.e. the m/m J/D of our main timeline. * Saturday July 29th: Alternate Universe/Curses/Other Weird Shit— incl. genderswaps, John survives AUs, no-supernatural AUs, fuck-or-die, possession, Huntercorp, time-travel, monsterfucking, omega!verse, prequel AU, whatever your sicko heart desires! * Sunday July 30th: Kink — what it says on the tin: give us some kinky shit. As you can tell, the line between canon and AU is very blurry, and J/D can be kinky in any world. So don’t worry too much about sticking to themes – chances are, your work will fit in at least one of these days.

6. What about prompts?

Flip over to pg. 10 for instruction, and pg.11 for the list.

7. I don’t like any of the prompts and I want to freeball and/or rawdog it.

We see what you did there! Submissions need not be in response to a prompt. This is your chance to finish (or start!) some wips, to distill a story idea to its sexy essence without worrying about plot or worldbuilding, to turn a DFF ask into a little scene, etc. etc. Once again, as long as it’s J/D and porny we will take it!

More lore under the cut!

8. What is the desired porn-to-plot ratio?

As long as there is (a little, a hint of) fucking, we’ll take it! If you feel like you need plot to make your story work better/more enjoyable for *you*, please inject as much as you’d like.

9. How long should a fic submission be?

As long as tickles your pickle! You probably won’t get a lot of fucking done under 500 words, but feel free to prove us wrong.

10. I want you to reblog my stuff but this event name is very cringe and I don’t want to mention it.

A. Fuck you! B. You can notify us in other ways of your desire to share your filthy disgusting porn (e.g. dms, mention us in a reply, carrier pigeon, etc.)

11. John/Dean is so very sexy, but I’m shy and I don’t want to post on main. (This is NOT Jensen Ackles, by the way.)

They are the sexiest! You can post your work anonymously on ao3 and send us a link. You can also create a new tumblr account using a new email address and use that to share your wonderful daddycestuous creations. (If need be, we can also discuss email submissions).

12. Can my fic/art be used for another event?

Sure! As long as it hasn’t been published before.

13. Is non-con allowed?

Yes, but please give some heads-up in the tags or in the beginning of the fic.

14. Is under-age allowed?

See above.

15. I really want to participate but the timing doesn’t work for me.

No worries! a) Remember, you have two weeks from today to post whatever your heart desires. b) The point of this event is that it’s low stakes and there isn’t a lot of prep work required, which means theoretically we can have more than one round! If enough people want to participate again, we can definitely have a repeat later this summer/in the fall, etc. (Also, we always take late submissions!)

16. Who is the fucker behind the curtain?

Hi, it’s @egipci! Please feel free to send me any questions here or on my main blog!

17. We haven’t talked before/we don’t follow each other/I don’t like you. Can I still participate?

(Un)lucky for you, I love J/D about 1000x more than you don’t like me. As long as I can reblog your work to this blog, I will!

18. Your graphics suck! Our eyes are bleeding! Are you making this shit on a toaster?

Actually, I’m making it on an DIY busted-up Walkman-cum-toaster. If you got some better nerd instruments and you want to put them to good use, hit me up!

[ghosts-and-blue-sweaters]

🌹🌹🌹🌹🌹🌹🌹🌹🌹🌹🌹🌹🌹🌹🌹🌹🌹🌹🌹🌹🌹🌹🌹🌹🌹🌹🌹🌹🌹🌹🌹🌹🌹🌹🌹🌹🌹🌹🌹🌹🌹🌹🌹🌹🌹🌹🌹🌹🌹🌹🌹🌹🌹🌹🌹🌹🌹🌹🌹🌹🌹🌹🌹🌹🌹🌹🌹🌹🌹🌹🌹🌹🌹🌹🌹🌹🌹🌹🌹🌹🌹🌹🌹🌹🌹🌹🌹🌹🌹🌹🌹🌹🌹🌹🌹🌹🌹🌹

smirks hehehee

If I counted correctly, that is 98 roses! Holy jalapeños!

Okay. Y’know what. This is what I think I’ll do.

I probably have at least 100 WIPs, so I’ll see if I can find a line from each of them to share :D I’ve lost inspiration for most of them aksgaksgajsg but still!!

Edit: I gave up XD You get 42 snippets lol

~~~

1

Wilbur blinks, lifting his head—away from the bottom of the bridge, that's good, that's what Tommy wanted—to blink at his brother. "Hey."

~~~

2

Wilbur scowls. He wishes that he hadn't cried. Now all the doctors and nurses remember him as the crying kid. So embarrassing.

~~~

3

Crawling close to his brother, Wilbur gently places his hands on the baby's side, rolling Tommy over until he's flat on his back. Tommy squints up at him, arms sprawled out so he looks like a capital T. Wilbur stifles back a giggle.

~~~

4

Wilbur smiles really, really big. "Now we're a family."

~~~

5

Wilbur watches him evenly. "I just want you to know that I'll like you forever. Even when you stop being a baby and everything. Even when you get big. I'll always be bigger than you, so that means... that means my love will get bigger, too!"

~~~

6

Mum doesn't seem to hear him. She always has trouble hearing him when she has the bottles.

~~~

7

The train continues to barrel towards him, and Wilbur doesn't blink.

~~~

8

"Hm?" Tommy looks up, staring at Tubbo for a moment before nodding. "Yeah, yeah, of course. Obviously. They don't call me Tommy 'The Listener' for nothing."

"No one calls you that."

"They do! They talk about me in the streets, Tubbo!"

"The streets?"

"Yeah." Tommy flicks his spoon with a finger, watching it slide around the bowl. A few drops splatter onto the table. "You're just not listening hard enough."

"Alright then; what was I talking about just now?"

"Uhh... a game- mods! You mentioned mods!"

Tubbo nods slowly. "Alright. I stand corrected."

"Get corrected, idiot." Tommy smirks.

~~~

9

Softly said by an old friend as they sat together on the front porch, chatting amiably as crows flew overhead.

~~~

10

He'd give anything to hear that laugh, even just once more.

~~~

11

Phil doesn't swoop in to save him.

~~~

12

Ghostbur stares at the notebook in front of him, feeling his heart begin to quicken. It's empty. Pages and pages of blank paper. Senseless, meaningless.

Is that how my brain looks inside? Miles and miles of nothingness?

~~~

13

The last word comes out in a sob, and then Tommy's arms are wrapped around him, and Tubbo's face is buried into Tommy's chest, and they're both holding on for dear life.

~~~

14

Storm. Wilbur feels his heart skip a beat. His first storm in thirteen years.

~~~

15

But in the off-chance you don't throw this letter in the bin, hello! I thought I should update you on what's been going on recently, so you don't freak out (because we all know that you tend to freak out from time to time. You're quite clingy).

~~~

16

Wilbur squeals, excitedly kicking out with his legs. Phil grins down at him, making sure his grip is secure. It's not hard to hang onto a five year old, but he doesn't want to risk dropping him.

~~~

17

Wilbur slides his jacket off his shoulder, exposing his dirt streaked bandage, already soaked with blood. Tommy doesn't hesitate.

~~~

18

"Hello, Phil." A soft voice rang out, cutting through the lazy chatter of bugs and the gentle swishing of leaves. It was a voice Phil knew by heart, one that he could pinpoint in the middle of a raging battle, the fiercest storm, at the end of the world, even.

~~~

19

“Not, um, nothing! Nothing, Wilbur, really! Come to think of it, do I hear Eret? Oh yes, I almost forgot; I need to go see him, so bye-"

~~~

20

The first time Tommy says it, Wilbur is picking berries.

~~~

21

The silence is uncomfortable. Wilbur’s skin crawls, and the air seems to crackle with tension.

At least for him. The ghost seems perfectly happy, walking strangely in order to stomp on fallen leaves. He bends down at multiple points, admiring a caterpillar or picking up a rock.

Wilbur doesn’t stop to wait for him, but Ghostbur doesn’t seem to mind. It’s annoyingly infuriating.

~~~

22

And then Quackity had stopped by, smirking behind the glass walls. Wilbur had glared at him, failing to notice the smoking grill in the kitchen. Quackity noticed though, and his already large grin grew even wider, especially when Wilbur began smelling smoke and had cursed loudly, racing into the back room.

When he'd returned to the counter, he'd found a lovely message spray-painted onto the glass walls:

Your burgers suck.

~~~

23

There's a man that plays music on the surface.

~~~

24

"Phil." Techno clapped his hands together, speaking in the same tone that a parent would use as they're trying to explain something to a child. "These people know who we are. They know who we are, and they want to get rid of us."

"'Get rid of' is a pretty strong choice of-"

"The posters literally say 'wanted dead or alive', Philza!"

~~~

25

He'll then grab a baked potato and a cup of water, gazing at himself in the reflection and swirling it around, distorting his features. He has bags under his eyes now. Streaks of dirt across his cheeks. A crack in his lip.

~~~

26

"Wha- but I am a grown, I'm a big man, I'm the biggest man there ever was!" Tommy stutters, puffing out his chest. "See? I'm asserting dominance!"

~~~

27

The shower handle rests towards the ceiling, the long, attached cord snaking down and burrowing itself into the wall. It's intimidating. He remembers being scared of shower handles as a kid; he thought they looked like water monsters.

~~~

28

Phil has fallen into a routine. Or perhaps fallen is the wrong word for it; it's more like settling. The routine has always been there, it's just taken him a while to discover it.

That's poetic as crap. Isn't it.

~~~

29

Wil smiles a bit wider. The skin around his eyes crinkles, just like his father's. "Yes. But now- now we can do it, right? And it's not even illegal!"

~~~

30

"I mean that it won't pacify them. Chat's crazy, Wilbur. They don't listen to anything I have to say. They just say E."

Phil laughs louder, and a little bit of tea spills out the side of his mug.

ANGRYBLADE

NOOOOOOO

E

BAD TECHNO

That Wilbur dude is funny he should do lore

PHIL IS LUAGHING HE'S GONNA CHOKE AND DIE HELP

E

BOREDDDDD

E

E

silly little wilblur he will undertsadn soon

E

~~~

31

"I mean," Tubbo tilts his head, squinting into the sunset. "Tommy... he's a little startling, I admit. And loud."

"Very loud."

"And definitely a bit much, at times. I agree that he can be a little intimidating. But trust me, he wouldn't hurt a fly."

"Oh. That's- that's reassuring."

"I mean, he'd definitely hurt Dream."

"O- oh."

"And Sapnap. And Bad. And a couple other people, now that I think about it."

"Oh."

"He'd break their knees."

Ranboo pulls his legs to his chest, wrapping his tail around them. "Oh."

~~~

32

"Alright." Tubbo shifts, clapping his hands together. Ranboo jumps. "Alright Michael. We'll tell you, uh... we'll tell you a story."

"We will?"

Tubbo forces himself to take a deep breath, turning to Ranboo with wide eyes. "Yes, Ranboo. We will. It will make him happy, won't it?"

"Uh..." Ranboo's eyes lighten with realization. "Oh, yeah. Defin- yeah, totally. Looks like we're, uh, doing a story. Story-time. Time for a story. Yep."

~~~

33

Wil claps his hands together, making her jump. "Then that's what we'll do! Teach me to cook, Niki Nihachu!"

"Well to start, we are baking, not cooking."

"Oh." Wilbur tilts his head. "I thought they were the same thing?"

"Um... no."

"Oh." Wilbur furrows his brow, as if struggling to comprehend this.

~~~

34

Wilbur's eyes flutter open, and he turns his head to the side as Sally climbs into the van. She's holding a bag of onion rings, along with a can of soda. "I got your snacks."

~~~

35

"Phil, please, just-!" Wilbur turns, slamming his fist onto the table and making himself jump with the loudness of it. "I don't- I don't really need... I don't-"

~~~

36

Wilbur shuts his eyes tight. "I don't want to be broken. I really don't want to be broken, but I am, and I don't... want to, Phil."

~~~

37

Phil sits at the dining room table, sipping tea that Techno had made earlier. It's hot, but Phil doesn't mind. He's content to blow the steam from the top, putting a little into his mouth before swallowing and setting down the mug. His favorite mug too, the one he'd bought from a far-away village in a far-away land in a far-away time. Or perhaps he'd stolen it.

~~~

38

Wilbur is all curled up like a wood louse.

~~~

39

Tubbo tries to get his shower. He really does! But he doesn't quite know how to work it; it's set up differently, and the water goes from boiling hot to ice cold with the slightest adjustment. He also can't figure out how to change it from pouring out of the faucet to spraying out of the shower head, and after several minutes of trying, he resorts to taking a bath instead.

~~~

40

"I know, Tommy. I'm getting a plaster for you, okay? That'll make it better."

~~~

41

"I am yours," Wilbur says, never once taking his eyes off her.

~~~

42

He likes chamomile, though. It's a good tea. It makes him feel sort of like a marshmallow is burning inside him, or like a tiny little campfire; like the big fireplace Techno has, but smaller. A small fire.

[starchilddante]

Ahhhhh this is amazingggggg

1. I started writing as a hobby in 2016. I was 10 years old!

2. It was this really cheesy cliche love story that makes me cringe to think about lmao. It was only like three pages long and I'm pretty sure I called Mi Amor or something 😑

3. Fantasy, romance, some poetry style stories. Most of things I write are geared towards YA as well.

4. Idk. I've written a lot of fantasy but I really like sadder more real-world stories (think They Both Die at The End, Girl in Pieces, A List of Cages, etc.) I'd like to write some more of those in the future.

5. Hmm... I like the enemies to lovers trope a lot. I've written for it a few times.

6. This may sound bad, but self-harm. I think it's stigmatized a lot still and I'd like to write something that tears that down.

7. His name is Julien. He's been hanging around in my head for almost seven years now. He's pessimistic but cares a lot about people, and his story is very sad. I love him a lot.

8. Oh jeez. Probably Bird. He's confident, super serious, witty, and fierce. I'm more of a shy person myself, really.

9. No. I think it can be done, but unless you do it really well, it just makes the story lose its stakes. Your readers will stop caring about the characters because now there's no reason to. They can come back. Unless it's the main focus of the story, I don't think it's a good idea.

10. Maybe Star Children? Space is so pretty.

11. Lol no but I probably will someday because I definitely have some favorite ships.

12. God, not a specific one, but I do go back to edit pages and cringe when I see a word repeated a lot. It's different words every time, tho.

13. Positive feedback from a teacher. She said, "I can feel your emotions in every word." It was a poetry piece, and that meant a lot to me. Also, in a moment of almost giving up, she told me, "Keep going. I truly believe you can write something that will change someone's life."

14. Sex in general? As an ace person, I feel like when I write about sex it sounds cheesy and ridiculous because I'm trying to write about feelings I've never even remotely experienced. But I'll keep trying and I find feedback from the allos so hopefully it'll work out lol.

15. Writing little sweet scenes out of order and then being too lazy to actually tell a chronological story 😅

16. My dream of being published, and also how books made me feel when I was younger. I wanna inspire someone else the way I was inspired.

17. It's based off of a job I had and the rumors of ghosts there. (I did see/hear some really strange things and I decided to roll with it into a story) (also I always have multiple WIPs soooo)

18. "You're an asshole, Charles, but that doesn't mean you have to be. You could change. You could be someone I'd trust my heart, no, my life with. You're not irredeemable. Not to me."

19. This is from Juliens' story. "You couldn't save me from death, but you saved me from a life without love."

20. Keep writing. Even if you feel like it's shit. You can write something that will change someone's life.

@kayrielwrites because I wanna know what you write about!!!

Writer's Ask Game

When did you start writing?

What was the first story you've ever written?

What genres have you written for so far?

What is your favourite genre to write for?

What is your favourite trope to write for?

What topic would you love to explore in your writing?

Who is the OC that is most like you?

Which OC is nothing like you?

Have you ever brought an OC back from the dead?

In which of your stories would you like to live?

Have you ever written fanfiction about your own work?

Do you have a word/phrase that you overuse in your writing?

What feedback did you receive for your writing that stuck with you?

What is something that you feel weird/uncomfortable writing about?

What is your current writing habit?

Where do you find inspiration to write?

Tell us a fun fact about your current WIP.

Show us a piece of dialogue you really like.

Show us the line you want readers to remember from your story.

Do you have one piece of advice for your fellow writers?

[nimata-beroya]

Star Wars Writing Resources

Note: None of the resources below are mine. I just assembled them in one place for your and my convenience. Feel free to use and reblog. If you know of any other useful site missing from the list, let me know and I'll gladly add it.

NOTE (05/17/23): There's a new, much more comprehensive version HERE.

Places

Interactive Galaxy Map by Henry Bernberg

Map of the Galaxy

List of planets and moons [Wikipedia /needs expanding]

Planet Name Generator 1 [SciFi Ideas]

Planetary System Generator [Donjon]

Character Development

Star Wars Name Generator 1 [Donjon]

Star Wars OC flow chart by @thefoodwiththedood

Star Wars Name Generator 2 [FantasyNames]

Star Wars Name Generator 3 [FantasyNames]

The character creator

Droid Name Generator

Star Wars Randomizer by @aureutr

Clone Trooper face/helmet template pack by @fox-trot

Clone Picrew by @batdad

Character Picrew [Twi-leks, Zabraks, Torgutas and Nautolans] @/megaramikaeli

Star Wars Character Templates by SmacksArt [the ULTIMATE battery of template for any human/humanoid original character in any era. From troopers to droids, from Jedi to Sith, from KOTOR to the sequel Trilogy. 100% RECOMMENDED]

Miscellaneous

Standard Calendar and Holidays [including month names!]

Galactic Standard Calendar [wookiepedia // including week day names]

Date converter according to SWTOR [Google sheet]

Hyperspace Travel Times (to calculate how much time would take to go from point A to point B within the GFFA)

Materials (fabrics, leathers, silks, plastics, construction, metal composites, etc.)

List of TCW Opening Quotes

Ship Generator 3D

Star Wars: The Clone Wars Republic Military Hierarchy Flowcharts by @cacodaemonia

Languages; Phrases and Slang; Vocabulary

Coruscant Translator (from/to Basic from/to Old Corellian, Proto-Basic, and Smuggler's Cant; Catharese and High Cathar; Cheunh and Minnisiat; Echani and Thyrsian; Mirialan; Flora Colossi, Ortolan, and -everyone's favorite- Mando'a)

In-Universe phrases and slang [Google sheet]

List of phrases and slang [wookiepedia]

List of equivalents to real-world objects [wookiepidia]

Star Wars Menu Generator

Helpful blogs

The amazing @fox-trot, who not only makes astonishing art and write an amazing fic, she also responds to medical questions and gives all kinds of references for writing medic characters.

@writebetterstarwars, which seems to be inactive, but there are a bunch of references there.

@howtofightwrite The place to find out how to write a good fight scene.

@scriptmedic no longer active, but it has a great deal of useful information.

@scripttorture for your whump needs. Major trigger warning for all its content.

Writing in General (For those who don't want to die like Stormtroopers)

SlickWrite: Completely free; online. Checks grammar, punctuation, flow, and writing style according to different settings (including fiction writing).

ProWritingAid: [RECOMMENDED] One of the most thorough online proofreader I've ever used. Although when using a free account gives extremely thorough feedback, it gives +20 different in-depth reports for only the first 500 words for free. However, you can earn a premium account license (for a year or for life) if you get 10 or 20 new users signing up for free; (if you wouldn't mind doing so using the link above and help me earn mine, please). The settings allow you to check your writing according to your needs, from general to formal to creative. It has a bonus that you can check depending on the genre you're writing. For example, in creative, you can choose romance or sci-fiction (there are 14 sub-genre in total). And just like google docs, you can share a document, and people can view, comment or edit.

LanguageTool: [RECOMMENDED] Another excellent proofreader. It also has a word limit in free accounts, but if you use the add-on for Google Docs, it counts each page as a new document, so hitting the limit is nearly impossible. It helps you to rewrite a sentence, even if it doesn't raise any flags; it's very useful for when your sentence is grammatically correct, but it doesn't feel quite right.

Grammarly, Hemingway Editor: No so great, but they do the basic job.