#this took two hours and a bit of research and idk how much the other two systems will take

[illbegottenfaith]

ferrari

as part of a social visit, you spend a fortnight at an English politician's estate with his god-awful son (politician's son!theo x american socialite!reader)

a/n - this fic took sooo long im so excited to publish it!!! also im such a sucker for the trope where one half of a couple is THE most insidious hater with absolutely no chill but then halfway through they start feeling like...why's the other person kinda........hmmmmmmm (p.s. this started off inspired by the song by the neighbourhood but idk if i would call this a songfic ehehe enjoyy)

tropes/warnings - enemies to lovers, forced proximity, fluff/banter, mildly british-phobic, incorrect descriptions of ferraris as manual (god i researched too much about ferraris against my will also i apologise for the inconsistencies car/f1 girlies)

word count - 5.8k

taglist - @kandralice @justme989898 @iamheretoread1234 @allie-sturns @hzdhrtss @friedfreyfries @bushnellswife @rose-of-the-grave @thaliashifts @pariahsparadise @babene-e @fratbrochrisgf @user089167

A car.

A yellow car.

A bright, disgusting, honest-to-god canary yellow Ferrari was peeling into the driveway at the ungodly hour of a quarter to 7 in the morning.

You rubbed the sleep from your eyes. Most of yesterday had passed in an exhausting blur, given how jet-lagged you were, but this took the cake. You blinked, opening your eyes further. The car was still there, as loud and insecurely showy as it had been at first glance.

Perhaps your eyes hadn't adjusted to the English countryside gloom. Yes, that had to be it. You were sure that in proper daylight, the car would appear a luxurious cream, or perhaps even an elegant taupe.

Once you had dressed and crept downstairs, shivering in the early morning chill that blanketed the vast estate, a butler informed you that Master Nott would be down shortly to join you for breakfast. But it wasn't the genteel, elderly man that had welcomed you and your father the day before that walked in.

"Apologies for my absence yesterday," said the man walking towards the breakfast table, fiddling with a button. "I hope my father wasn't too boring. I was occupied with some other business. Theodore Nott. Junior."

He stuck out a hand at the last bit, and you eyed it with a restrained distaste. Perhaps it was just the cynic in you, but something about his demeanour felt politically calibrated to dazzle you. The apple clearly didn't fall far from the tree - Theo Nott Jr. was every bit his father's son. However, this Theodore appeared more charismatic and charming, whereas his father seemed more reserved and cordial.

And yet, there was something untrustworthy about his smile. What kind of business did he occupy himself with?

"So, Theodore," you asked as you buttered a piece of toast, "what do you like to do for pleasure?"

"Nothing much out of the ordinary - golfing, collecting art, skiing. I enjoy a good holiday every now and then."

Your lips quirked a little at that. Calling it 'a little holiday every now and then' was putting it lightly, you decided. Theodore Nott Jr. had a reputation that could easily rival any of your more scandalous counterparts. It seemed like all he did was travel, jet-setting from one location to the next, finding ever-brilliant ways of dragging his father's name in the mud. Given his father's staunch refusal to comment on his son's debaucherous behaviours, you guessed there was no love lost between the two.

"Oh, and cars," Theo continued obliviously. "I do like cars."

You placed your toast down, frowning.

"Your business yesterday. It wouldn't have had anything to do with that...you know...the yellow..." you trailed off, motioning with the butter knife.

Theo looked surprised. The mildly curious look on his face felt miles more genuine than his unscrupulous smile just minutes ago. The curve of his lips hinted at something - like a smile, but not quite.

"Your bedroom does overlook the driveway, doesn't it? But yes - I was in town yesterday afternoon to pick up my new car." Misreading your curiosity as interest, he probed further. "Why? Do you like it?"

You thought back to the grotesquely gleaming vehicle. You barely held back from pulling an unbecoming face.

"Car is...a strong word for that monstrosity."

Theo's lips parted, giving you the impression that he had a dozen replies on the tip of his tongue, but no voice for any of them.

"Well. You Americans have the strangest ways of describing classics."

You raised your eyebrows. "Classic? Little Women is a classic. That...is a Colleen Hoover book at best."

Theo watched you curiously, uncomprehending.

"What? You're not up to date on contemporary unfeminist literature?"

From the blank look on his face, the quip was clearly lost on him. Merlin, was he going to be this slow the entire visit?

"When Father mentioned contacting a translator, I assumed he was having a laugh," the boy said, prying open a tiny jar of honey. "Now, I'm not so sure."

The two of you endured a painfully awkward meal and you excused yourself at the first available opportunity, taking care not to seem overly eager to leave the room. Behind you, you heard a faint clink of china and a muttered, sardonic echo.

"Monstrosity."

You didn’t intend to play. That much you wanted to make perfectly clear.

After spending the morning occupied with other business, Theodore's father had invited you and your father for afternoon tea and a game of lawn polo with Theo and his friends - all carefully groomed hedges and intimidatingly pressed uniforms. You had been under the mistaken assumption that you'd be on the watching end of things. When Theo invited you to join the game, you offered a tight-lipped smile.

"I'm afraid I didn't pack any riding clothes," you said apologetically. It was true, you hadn't, but your worries had more to do with the fact that you hadn't ridden since you were 12.

Theo turned towards you, his hair sun-tousled with a sly slant to his eyes that promised nothing good for you.

“Whatever you’re wearing now is more than fine.”

You looked down at your blouse and loose linen trousers, uncertain.

"Unless, of course," he continued, dropping his voice, "you don't feel up for the game?"

You glanced up, reading the challenge in his words. He was goading you, and you knew better than to fall for it. But you just couldn't stand the idea of him holding this over your head, subtly or otherwise, for the rest of your visit. And so, as utterly infuriating as it was, you took the bait - hook, line, and sinker.

"Don't be ridiculous," you muttered through clenched teeth, taking the helmet he held out for you.

And so you awkwardly mounted a dapple-grey gelding under the watchful eye of yours and Theo's fathers, pretending you weren’t one misplaced pebble away from sliding off your horse, face-first. Theo carelessly introduced his friends from boarding school - Mattheo Riddle and Blaise Zabini. They waved at you good-naturedly, and you nervously smiled back. They seemed friendly enough, but then again, so had Theo.

The game started fast - faster than you were comfortable with, if you were being completely honest. Within minutes, you were hopelessly lost while Theo, unsurprisingly, was in his element. He rode like he’d been riding all his life, and he probably had - back straight, jaw tight, eyes narrowed with something more intense than friendly competition. Meanwhile, you struggled to keep up, your hands slick with sweat on the reins.

Theo whirled past you on his stallion, calling over his shoulder, “Next time, try aiming for the ball.”

The others laughed, well-mannered, while Theo smirked with a special kind of malice, as if he were all too aware of the heat crawling up your neck. You smiled through it, chin high, your thoughts drifting to violent fantasies of bashing his perfectly sculpted face in with your mallet.

He wasn’t just fast; he was precise. Every time you neared the ball, he was there, cutting you off with easy, practiced turns or thundering by close enough to rattle you. Not enough to technically break the rules, but enough to make you painfully aware of how out of your depth you were.

At some point, the teasing and missteps began to chip away at your carefully composed expression. Your lips thinned. Your jaw locked. The linen blouse that once felt effortlessly chic now clung to your back.

You glanced around the lawn irritably when one of his friends caught your eye from across the field. Blaise, if you remembered correctly. He gave the subtlest flick of his wrist, adjusting the way he held his mallet. You mirrored him instinctively, and almost immediately, your wrist felt less strained. Stunned, you shot him an appreciative look.

A few minutes later, Mattheo came riding up beside you at a slower pace, his horse snorting softly.

“Alright, New York?” he asked with a lazy grin.

That piqued your attention. Although you currently lived in LA, it wasn't exactly common knowledge that you were born and brought up in New York City. Still, you weren't sure how much you could trust either of them. They were Theo's friends, after all.

“Just peachy,” you replied coolly.

He leaned a little closer, and you felt mildly jealous and how effortless he made it seem.

“You know, Theo only acts like this when he really hates someone.”

You raised a brow. “Oh?”

“Or,” he added casually, as he gathered his reins in one hand, “when he really likes them.”

The implication hit only after he had steered his horse away. You blinked, before seizing your own reins with a newfound determination. Whatever game Theo thought he was playing, you weren’t about to let him win it.

With your grip improved and your instincts finally catching up, you started anticipating the ball's path. Your swings grew sharper, more confident. You manoeuvred around Theo once, twice, three times.

At the final play, it was all heat and desire for vengeance. You galloped forward, timing your swing just as the ball veered to the left. Your mallet connected with a satisfying crack, sending it cleanly rolling between the makeshift goal posts.

The applause was courteous but audible; your father's a little more effusive than was strictly polite.

You trotted past Theo, heart still pounding, your smile flushed and wicked.

His face remained as impassive as marble. “There are less showy ways to win, you know” he said, voice neutral.

You leaned in. “But hardly half as satisfying.”

You dismounted and handed off your reins to a stablehand, still floating on the high of your victory.

“A play like that deserves its own prize,” Nott Sr. said with faux formality. “Perhaps a small trophy. Or a drink named after you in the club lounge.”

You nodded graciously, murmuring something demure.

But your eyes flicked to Theo as he dismounted a few paces away. His jaw was tight. His shoulders tense. The bad-tempered flick of his brow as he handed off his helmet was the clearest reaction you’d seen all day.

And, if you were being completely honest, that little crack in his perfectly constructed exterior was the best trophy you could’ve asked for.

"Bored out of your skull, aren't you?"

You jumped, startled from where you had been resting your head for a brief shut-eye. This afternoon, the Notts were hosting you, your father, and some Ministry officials at an art gallery. With considerable effort, you lasted about half an hour before you excused yourself to the car outside Even now you had to contend with a humidity that made your hair stick to the back of your neck. It had been drizzling incessantly since morning, introducing a dampness to everything.

"Understandably so," Theo continued in a smug tone that made you kick yourself for letting him catch you unawares. "It's all a little dry for me, and I grew up with this stuff."

You straightened in the passenger seat, resisting the urge to nervously fix your hair, smoothing out whatever scrap of dignity you had left.

"I don't know what you're talking about. The tour was highly intriguing. I was just in here looking for my...my sunglasses." You peered into the glove compartment. What had left your lips as a fib was now becoming a rather real problem, actually - where were your sunglasses? You were too distracted to notice Theo climbing into the driver's seat beside you until the door shut. You closed the glove box, defeated, thinking hard about where you last saw them.

"Penny for your thoughts?" he asked. "Or - what would that be for you? Dollar for your thoughts?"

"Cent."

"Are you sure? With these exchange rates?"

For what felt like the hundredth time since the beginning of your trip, you shot Theo a dirty look. Not that it seemed to upset him.

"Nice weather we're having," he tried again.

You shrugged, glancing up at the clouded skies. "I guess. Does it never get fully dry here?"

You regretted opening your mouth as soon as you saw the ill-disguised amusement on his face. Clearly, you had just said something wilfully ignorant of the place. It wasn't your fault. Who had the time to vacation in dreary old England when the rest of Europe seemed so warm, colourful and dry?

"'Fraid so. You must understand, we're quite a bit of ways from Californ-yuh."

You grimaced.

"Was that your attempt at an American accent?"

Theo grinned. You had been around your fair share of good-looking people, but when Theo smiled - genuinely smiled, full of mirth or adolescent mischief - it almost hurt to look at his beautiful face.

If only didn't come attached with that insufferable personality.

"Come on. It wasn't that bad."

"It didn't even sound like English."

"It did - and what's more, that is exactly what you sound like."

You gasped, appalled. This miscreant was supposed to be the well-bred progeny of an English Ministry official? The mocking and teasing you could put up with, but outright insults were where you drew the line.

"Is not!"

"Is too."

"Is - " you stopped yourself, giving Theo a dirty look. He looked hardly apologetic; if anything, he seemed awfully pleased with himself for successfully having roped you in some inane, childish spat.

"You know what? You're right. The day's wasted just sitting around."

Theo didn’t wait for you to respond. He turned the key in the ignition, and the engine roared to life.

You froze.

"What are you doing?"

"Taking you for a spin," he said casually, as if it were nothing. “You clearly need to get out more, get some fresh air in those lungs.”

"The hell I do - Theodore, no."

But he was already reversing, one hand on the wheel, the other behind the passenger seat headrest. The car jerked at a hard turn, gravel spitting beneath the tires. A moment later, he punched it forward, the sudden acceleration slamming you back against the seat.

“I am not dying in a British clown car,” you hissed with a white-knuckled grip on the door handle.

Theo didn’t even look at you. “It’s Italian,” he said smoothly, switching gears like it was muscle memory. “And she likes to be pushed.”

He turned towards you, peering over his sunglasses with his startlingly dull eyes.

"Though I have to warn you, if you insult my car again, I'm not above leaving you at the side of the road."

You could barely process the words before he was tearing down a narrow country road, weaving between bends. The hedges blurred into a smear of green. Your stomach lurched with every curve he barely braked for, the car swinging wide, tires shrieking with every corner he turned too fast.

“You're a lunatic!” you shouted, clutching your seatbelt, as the speedometer soared past any sane number.

“And you’re too uptight,” he said coolly, shifting gears with a little flourish. “But here we are.”

The tires skidded slightly as he made another turn. Raindrops streaked the windshield. Your fingers frantically fumbled along the seat. Seatbelt. Seatbelt.

“Jesus - Theo - SLOW DOWN.”

But he didn’t. If anything, the Ferrari sped up, surging forward like it had something to prove.

You felt it in your chest, in your teeth, adrenaline flooding your veins. Your heart was beating so fast it hurt.

“I swear to God, if you kill me—”

“Oh, I’d never. Imagine the paperwork.” His smile widened as the road narrowed. “Besides, this car is worth considerably more than your life.”

“You are such an asshole.”

Theo clicked his tongue, entirely unbothered. “Language,” he rebuked. “Bit unladylike, don’t you think?”

You'd have had your hands around his neck by now if he wasn't the one driving this death trap machine. Your stomach flipped as the car surged forward again. The car lifted slightly as it hit a bump, just enough for your breath to catch in your throat. When it slammed back down, you swore you felt your bones rattle.

“This isn’t fun,” you said, voice ragged.

“Not for you, maybe.” Theo downshifted just to hear the engine snarl. You were going to throw up. Or pass out. Or both.

All of a sudden, you felt the car slowing down. You looked up, dizzy with relief, just as Theo slowed to a stop outside the gallery. He looked invigorated by the ride, and also as though he was trying not to laugh. Delicately, he pulled down the sunglasses that you had stuck in your hair earlier that morning.

"Found them," he said, far too cheerfully.

But you were at your limit. You finally snapped.

You stepped out of the car on wobbly legs, slamming it closed just as your father and a couple of Ministry officials were exiting the gallery.

"Which way to the estate?" You asked crossly, interrupting their conversation. Your father looked between yours and Theo's faces, alarmed.

"What h- "

"Which. Way. to the estate."

Your father hesitated in his reply, clearly appalled by your bright red face. Or perhaps the state your hair was in.

"That way. But Y/N, honey, if you take one of the cars - "

"I'm walking."

"All the way back, darling?" he asked fretfully. "At least let Theodore drive you."

This was clearly the wrong thing to have said, if your aggravated shriek was any indication. You gracelessly turned and started walking back to the manor, uncaring of the scene you were making. And as for Theo -

Well. You didn't care to even spare him a glance.

"It was awful, Vee. He's awful. He just does whatever he wants whenever he wants, consequences be damned." You were lying on your room's window seat, fresh out of a shower after the hike back, talking to a friend on the phone while staring hatefully out the window at the blissfully peaceful sprawling grounds. Stupid England and its stupid politicians and their stupid sons and its stupid mud.

Your gaze drifted sorrowfully towards your boots, which hadn't survived the walk home. "And Daddy calls me spoiled," you sniffled.

You heard a familiar crunch of gravel and looked out to see a disgustingly familiar car pulling in. You glared at it as Theo killed the engine and stepped out. You watched him scan the exterior, presumably counting windows until he met your gaze. He waved at you, motioning for you to come downstairs. For a moment, you indulged in the fantasy of flipping him off and drawing your curtains.

"What?" You started crossly as you walked out to the porch, still too peeved to even pretend at civility.

Theo just tilted his head, leaning against the car, eyes hidden behind his sleek, rectangular shades. "You know, I don't think I've seen you smile once your whole trip. Is everyone in America always this discontent?"

"I don't know. Is everyone in England always this unpleasant?"

Theo had the decency to look a little embarrassed. "Touché."

He cleared his throat and stood up a little straighter. Prick. He probably liked the idea of you having to tilt your head upwards just to look him in the eye.

"I really am sorry about this afternoon. It's just - sometimes there's no stopping me when I really get going. Especially if it has anything to do with my father."

You raised an eyebrow, unimpressed. "So that's it? I'm just a pawn for you to use to get back at your dad?"

"No, that's not - " Theo ran a hand through his rougishly dishevelled hair. He took a deep breath.

"Let me start over. My behaviour has been...rude, and disrespectful, and you didn't deserve any of it. So..."

Theo turned and picked something up from the passenger seat - a navy blue, velvet box. You eyed it skeptically.

"What's this?"

"Peace offering."

You stared at the box for a while before you caved in out of curiosity. You grudgingly accepted the box and opened it. You felt your mouth go dry. Nestled in the thick, rich fabric was the most delicate, exquisite set of diamond earrings you had ever seen. They glittered as if in slow motion in the late afternoon sun. This was no American brand - Cartier, perhaps?

"Truce?"

Your head snapped up, and you remembered why you were here, and who you were talking to. You traced part of the earrings' outline longingly. Damn. With diamonds like these, he could have a truce and then some.

"Yeah. I mean, fine. Truce, I guess," you stammered out disinterestedly, trying to hide how the gift had rendered you speechless.

You had specific tastes. You didn't shop excessively but precisely. It was why you could never take to a personal shopper - no one seemed to understand your tastes or preferences as well as you did yourself. Until today, that is.

With considerable difficulty, you shut the box. After all, it would be rude to reject such an expensive gift. You didn't even know if they did returns in this part of Europe. Why should you begrudge yourself such a fine piece of jewellery just because he decided to be an ass?

"Is that all?"

"Mostly. How did your boots hold up?"

You stayed resolutely silent, but something on your face must have given it away. Theo wrinkled his nose sympathetically. "Thought so. We have a cobbler a little way in the town. I can drop them off for you, if you'd like. They should be done by the time I get back."

"Back?"

It was only then that you noticed the trunk propped up in the backseat of the car.

"I'm visiting Normandy for a few days."

You raised your eyebrows, unimpressed but not surprised. "Didn't you just get back from Italy?"

"This one's more of a house call. Speaking of, I really should get a move on." "So, your boots?"

You hesitated. These were your Manolo Blahniks. Your babies. Could you really trust a man as vile as he was with them? Then again, it didn't look like they could get much worse.

While you deliberated, Theo rolled his eyes. "Fine, whatever. Keep your boots. Just wait for the mud to dry and then brush it off. That should get most of it."

With that, he stepped back into the car and fastened his seat belt. He looked up to where you were still staring at him mistrustfully.

"Well, I'm off. Feel free to direct some of that snark towards my father while I'm gone."

You numbly watched him reverse out the gate and turn into the main streets, the gift weighing heavily on your mind.

You hadn't anticipated how quiet the manor could be without Theo. Did he really occupy so much space that the manor felt incomprehensibly vast and cold without him? You whiled away your days at dinners and luncheons and how you usually occupied yourself on these kinds of alien social vists, but it just wasn't the same without anyone your age. You were starting to get so bored, it almost felt like you were beginning to miss him.

It was almost a week since you last saw Theo. You were in your room, making plans to go into town, when you glimpsed a figure near the perimeter of the estate's front lawn. You opened your window. There was something familiar about the carelessly sun-kissed crop of curls.

Looking closer, you realised you were right. You didn't know he was back, but it was most certainly Theodore Nott in the black suit - Merlin, that had to be uncomfortably warm - glinting cufflinks, purposeful stride. He looked stiffly formal in a way you’d never seen him. Polished and imposing with his usual languid gait replaced by something far more measured.

Theo's gaze drifted up the estate until his eyes met yours. You leaned against the windowsill and gave him a look, brow arched, lips parted, and he...nothing. Theo had absolutely no reaction to you. His eyes were on yours, but it was as though he was seeing straight through you. Just a tiny, barely there tick in his jaw before he looked away.

That was when you noticed the foreign dignitary following closely behind, dressed as sharply as Theo. You propped your chin up on your hand, watching with renewed interest. Ah. Hosting, are we?

Really, he only had himself to blame for you turning it into a little game. He should have known it would be dull as tomes without him. Every time his gaze wandered towards you, voluntarily or otherwise, you waved brightly, blew him a kiss or two, and the like, all while he did his best to keep a straight face and look away.

His posture changed. Stiffened. A flick of his shoulder. A twitch of the hand. A slight turn of his head as if fighting the urge to look again. You could see him biting the inside of his cheek. At one point, he even coughed. This all only further encouraged you.

Eventually, Theo turned away from you fully, his mouth moving as he muttered something to the dignitary. His face was mostly hidden now, but not before you caught the faintest curve of a smile biting into his cheek.

Victory.

You watched them retreat to the cool indoors. You stayed at the window watching the stray sprigs of dandelions toss their heads in the faint breeze until you ran out of patience. You hurried downstairs, determined to vex him for being away for so long. Theo apparently had a similar idea and you nearly ran smack into him as you turned the corner on the spiral stairs.

"How was Normandy?" you asked in a breathless rush, his hand warm at your elbow.

"Terribly pleasant without you constantly looking down on everything." Up close, he looked a little more bronze, a little more rosy than when you last saw him. Or maybe that had to do with him running up the stairs.

The hand Theo had stuck out to stop you from running into him had regrettably fallen. "Mother sends gifts." Then, as if his body couldn't physically handle being nice to you, he added, "Clearly, she's never met you."

Your lips twitched. "Clearly."

You let Theo lead you down to the living room, where there was no dignitary but only a fabulous spread of French cheeses, smiling at him prettily as he somewhat sarcastically offered you a seat. You took a sip of the wine he poured you, watching him pretend not to watch you back. The two of you spent the rest of the afternoon lazily picking at the variety of French cheeses Theo had brought home, talking about any and everything under the sun, from his trip to the summer camps you used to go to.

"I can't believe you didn't tell me you were back," you said an hour later, when the two of you were beginning to run out of things to talk about.

Theo gave an exaggerated wince as he refilled your glass. "Please. I came here straight from the jet, I promise you."

You rolled your eyes.

"Well, next time, you can tell your mother that I loved the - er, hang on...fromage de bois?"

"What?"

Theo sat up, watching your mouth intently. Your face was starting to feel a little hot, probably from all the wine.

"Say that again?"

You cleared your throat. "Um, fromage de bois?"

Theo shook his head. "Again."

You repeated yourself a little haltingly. French had never been your strong suit. Theo stared at you, brow furrowed, mystified.

"You are doing strange and unusual things with that tongue of yours...and none of it is right." He looked enthralled. Fascinated. Tipsy. You rolled your eyes. "Your accent is...in a word, abysmal."

You nibbled at the cheese you apparently couldn't pronounce right. "Sorry, Mr. Intercontinentally Educated. Some of us have to contend with the Ivy League legacies we were born into."

Theo busied himself with another wheel of cheese. You thought back to the foreign dignitary from that afternoon.

"I thought you didn't do your father any favours," you asked. It was a risky topic to broach, but you could always blame it on the wine.

Theo chewed for a long while.

"Usually, I don't."

"But?"

"But my mother thinks I should be less hard on him."

"Oh."

"And I think she's starting to forget what he's like."

Theo dusted his hands with a wry smile before reaching over you towards the crackers, broad-shouldered, close enough for you to feel the heat radiating off him. Too late, the thought to lean back crossed your mind, but by then Theo was already back in his seat, turning over the empty dish and eyeing you with mock disapproval.

"Someone's finished all the crackers."

You smiled innocently, crumbling the few crackers left in your hand as you watched him call for more.

It was your last night at the estate. There's no place like home, but it saddened you to leave this quaint slice of English countryside in the middle of nowhere. You were curled up on your window seat, trying to focus on a book you weren’t actually reading. You should have gone to bed hours ago, but something was keeping you up.

You were so sure he'd show up. One last time. Just for you.

You finally snapped your book shut, admitting defeat, and swung your legs into bed with a sigh. Then, you heard it - the low, unmistakable growl of a stupidly expensive sports car.

You hurried over to your window, shivering with anticipation. There Theo was, dressed down in a soft black sweater and slacks, leaning against that yellow Ferrari. You never doubted him for a second.

You padded downstairs with ill-disguised excitement.

"I'm here for your big send-off."

You raised your eyebrows. "Send-off?"

"Yeah. What kind of host would I be if I didn't give you the right send-off?"

Your eyebrows disappeared into your hair. The levels of hypocrisy of this man were astounding.

"You left the country for a week while we were here. Or have you forgotten?"

Theo was starting to look annoyed.

"Do you want a big send-off or not?"

"...okay."

You were in the passenger seat for barely ten minutes, cruising through narrow, moonlit country lanes, before Theo pulled into an empty side road.

You blinked at him. Maybe you trusted him too much, too quickly. Was this how you died?

“Why are we stopping?”

Theo walked over to your side of the car, opened the door and held out the keys. You eyed them distastefully.

"Please don't tell me you're giving me the car. Respect for other people's property is the only thing stopping me from driving this off a cliff."

"I'm not giving it to you," he said, as your fingers curled uncertainly around the metal. You relaxed.

"I'm teaching you how to drive it."

You laughed. Then stopped laughing.

“You’re serious?”

You were glad it was the middle of the night with nobody around, because you were gaping at him rather unbecomingly.

"Dr - drive this? Are you crazy?"

"I'm picking up a pattern here. I'm starting to think you have a very low bar for insanity."

"This cannot be legal. You guys don't even drive on the right side of the road here."

"Relax. I'll walk you through it."

And so, Theo eventually wheedled you into getting into the driver's seat, fastening your seatbelt and switching on the engine.

"Okay, so, foot goes on the brake, hands on the wheel - " For a moment, Theo's large warm hands enveloped yours, pulling them up to 10 and 2, and you felt your heart flutter. " - and, try not to kill us, yeah?"

You shot him a glare. "You're so funny," you deadpanned.

Theo grinned. You wiped the smile right off his face as the car lurched forward, nearly concussing him on the dashboard.

"Gentle, gentle," he wheezed.

The drive that followed was a mixture of cautious lurches and unexpected smooth patches. Theo’s instructions were teasing but not unkind. He guided you through each shift, each turn, with his voice low and amused. At one point, when you stalled the car trying to reverse out of a hedgerow, you noticed his shoulders shaking with suppressed mirth. You gave him the silent treatment for five blocks until he effusively and somewhat mockingly apologised.

When the two of you had had enough excitement for one night, Theo gave you directions back to the estate. Even in pitch dark, Theo knew the network of roads surrounding his family home like the back of his hand.

You pull into the driveway and kill the engine. A deafening silence settles over the two of you.

"So? How was I?"

Theo takes his time responding. "You did better than I expected."

You make a show of twirling your hair. "So you think I'm a natural."

Theo's oddly quiet. You can't make out his expression in the shadows.

"I think you're something," he says quietly. He leans forward enough for his expression to take shape in a sliver of moonlight. You feel your heart hammering in your chest.

All of a sudden, you don't want to go up to your room, knock out, and leave in the morning. You want to sit here in this god-awful Ferrari with Theo and his windswept hair and his bedroom eyes and the look on his face like he really wanted to kiss you.

"Theodore - "

"My friends call me Teddy," he murmurs, barely managing to force the words out before his mouth covers yours.

It’s not careful or practiced like most things Theo does. It’s a little desperate, a little clumsy - like he’s scared to hesitate. His hand finds your jaw, thumb brushing the corner of your mouth as he tilts his head slightly, deepening it enough to make you blush with the intimacy of it.

When he pulls back, just enough to breathe, his forehead rests against yours. You can feel how uneven his breathing is. How unsure.

You blink at him, stunned.

"Your friends don't call you Teddy."

Theo laughs shakily, and you realise that that isn't the most sensible reaction. For the first time in your trip, you laugh with him.

"What? You think I'm some idiot that doesn't notice what your friends call you?"

"You're right. They don't," Theo agrees with a breathless laugh. His breathing evens out. "But I was hoping you might."

You shake your head slightly, feeling a flush creeping up your neck.

"I can't believe I ever thought you were cool. You're so lame."

"And yet," he says softly, nudging his nose against yours, "you still haven't run for the hills."

You don’t answer. You don’t move. Not for a long, long while.

[sstan-hoe]

𝐀𝐧 𝐈𝐧𝐭𝐞𝐫𝐯𝐢𝐞𝐰 𝐭𝐨 𝐑𝐞𝐦𝐞𝐦𝐛𝐞𝐫

𝒑𝒂𝒊𝒓𝒊𝒏𝒈 — congressman!bucky barnes × journalist!fem!reader

𝒔𝒖𝒎𝒎𝒂𝒓𝒚 — interviewing congressman James Buchanan Barnes didn't seem like a big deal, if he wasn't known for getting the journalists fired...but with you...he had other ideas...

𝒘𝒂𝒓𝒏𝒊𝒏𝒈𝒔 — SMUT: p in v, unprotected, fingerings, sir kink, kind dark, kinda not, not aftercare cuz I didn't write it, bucky barnes, yeah that's a warning, did I forget anything?

𝒏𝒐𝒕𝒆 — okay, yeah, I jumped in that train, but how could I not? We can all agree I'm fucking rusty, idk what this is, I didn't even know how to end it? Where is my writing talent, like look at this? well, feedback is appreciated but ehh yeah I understand if not haha, also no beta, English is not my first language, yk all that stuff

You took a deep breath, bracing yourself for the chaos that would follow in the next two hours. It was your first major interview, before all you did was write a few articles and do research. Therefore, you were even more anxious with the task you got from your boss.

Disappointing her was not an option but you knew how difficult today would be, in preparation for this moment you watched many interviews with the congressman. You observed actions of journalists he would criticise or how he would react to certain questions.

This way you were able to tell yourself it would be a great interview. All while hoping your boss was not searching for a reason to fire you and this was her way of getting rid of you.

You had set questions, which couldn’t be changed and some you weren’t even allowed to ask. So, a waterproof plan, right? Well congressman Barnes wasn’t known for his flawless interviews or his friendly answers.

No, he was rude and harsh. Many journalists before you had lost their job or swore to never interview him again – or more like weren’t allowed to come back. His answers were short and often left no room for arguments. If a reporter even messed up a tiny bit, he would immediately call them out on it.

Walking into the tall building felt like you would crumble under the pressure, everything was so massive and intimidating. Well, a place fit for a man like James Buchanan Barnes.

They checked your ID and instructions. Simply what to do and not to do, nothing new. Still, it felt like you committed a crime, after all the secruity never left you alone, which made sense as they wanted to make sure Barnes was safe.

Although, he could protect himself with that metal arm of his – also something you were under no circumstances allowed to ask about. The last one who did, has never surfaced again.

“You can sit there, he will be with you in five minutes,” a man with broad shoulders and blonde hair told you. He looked like the typical American golden boy, he did seem a bit scary, but you would bet he was a true sweetheart.

“Okay,” you answered, though he probably didn’t even hear you as he walked right out of the door again. It gave you a chance to take in the room, it wasn’t like the usual interview rooms you saw on TV, no it seemed more private and secured.

In hopes to be perfect, you set everything up. Everything had to align, the papers, the pen and water of course. You could not give him any reason to snap at you.

Just as you finished, the man of the hour stepped in with five secruity men. Barnes entrance came with an unstoppable aura, like everyone would cower under his presence and most of the time they did.

He glared at you, as if you had just called him an asshole – which you didn’t. You tried your best not to show him how much it bothered you, so you just smiled brightly at him.

“Good morning, Mr. Barnes, I’m really honoured that you agreed to this interview,” you politely said once he sat down. “You’re welcome,” he answered, voice a lot deeper than you thought and awfully sexy. How could he be single? Also, a question no one was allowed to ask, but it was unusual for a congressman to have no partner…right?

He nodded at his men, and instantly they cleared out which confused you. “Aren’t they supposed to protect you?” you questioned, already regretting it.

“Yes, they are right in front of the door and the room has cameras everywhere,” he explained, voice monotone. Lightly he tilted his head, he gave every reporter three strikes – not telling them of course – and once they hit them, he would make them leave.

After knowing who would interview him, he did his research, and you were the first one he barley found any information on. You weren’t known yet, which was probably the reason they send you.

However it made him curious, the articles you had written so far were good – some even better than the ones of his previous reporters. Besides you were a lot prettier than them.

“Oh, yeah…that makes sense,” you nodded in agreement, trying to hide the fact that you still found it weird. “Okay, then we should start. I will ask you questions, and you answer them however you want, and-,” “I know how to answer questions doll,” he cut you off in a sharp tone, eyes quite dark.

Great, this was going fucking great, you told yourself, “I know, of course, I just…I’m used to doing it this way,” you tried your best to explain, keeping a smile on your lips. In response Barnes lifted his eyebrow, “you’re used to making the person oppisite of you look stupid?”

Couldn’t there be a fire, or an attack or anything? Anything that would make you end this interview, “no, no I’m not. We will just start, first question: not everyone is happy that you won the election, is there a way you want to proof yourself to them?”

“No, I won’t do anything. Everyone has their opinion, and they should keep it, I proofed myself enough, if I didn’t, I wouldn’t be here,” he answered, leaning back against his chair. You knew he had good answers but damn.

“Sounds good, I mean there was never a congressman everyone liked,” you agreed, writing his answer down. “Yes, thank you,” he said with sarcasm and only then you realised what you had actually said, with wide eyes you began apologizing, “I didn’t mean it like that, it’s just you know slang,” that what bullshit, it wasn’t slang you only needed an explanation.

“Slang?” he repeated, he knew you were nervous – everyone was – but he didn’t expect to enjoy it this much. You pressed your lips together, nodding along, “yes.”

“Next question,” you put a bright smile back on your face, “your term is rather young, but in this time, you already accomplished a lot, what are you most proud of?” For a moment there was a silence, it gave you a chance to take a closer look at Barnes.

Suddenly he had a small smirk on his lips instead of the normal stoic expression, you’d never seen him act any different in recent interviews. Maybe it was a good sign, maybe he wouldn’t end your carrier right after today.

“That every woman has the right of an abortion without fear,” he stated, crossing his fingers on his lap. You had no arguments there, it was truly remarkable.

Quickly you scribbled his answer down and checking the question off your list. “The other journalist had a recorder, are you not professional enough for that?” And there he was again, the friendly congressman everyone knew. It sounded almost as if he was taunting you.

“I am, just because I don’t fit your standard does not mean I’m unprofessional,” you snapped, then instantly clamping a hand over your mouth as you realised how you just spoke to the congressman.

Said person didn’t care, now he fully smirked with satisfaction, “so you actually can speak louder than a little mouse.” Oh, he looked so proud of himself for say that.

His words came unexpected, from your research you knew that he had a sharp tongue, but this was entirely new. From his answer you gathered he did it on purpose, but why would he want you to be rude? You could be reaching, but maybe your boss did want to get rid of you and asked him for help…okay that was crazy.

“Moving on,” you ignored his words, shaking your head a little as an idea popped in your head, if he could be an asshole so could you. “Many people wonder what happened with your arm, were you in the army or maybe an accident?”

“Come again?” he almost growled, features becoming dark and almost scary. Body moving a little forward, even though a small part of you was scared, you were extremely turned on.

You didn’t know what to say, should you really repeat it? Fuck it, yes. “What happened to your arm?” eyes staying on his, noticing how he flexed said arm.

“Becoming quite bold, are we? I remember this being a question you’re not allowed to ask,” he lifted his chin as if challenging you. This was exactly what he wanted, to see if you were really as shy as he read and he was positively surprised.

“I told you I’m not like the others,” suddenly you forgot who you were talking to, forgot how he was one of the most important and powerful people in the world.

Then he stood up, his huge body towering over you. Bucky rested his hands on either side of your chair, face dangerously close to yours. It was as if he could feel how nervous you became.

“No, you’re not…,” he whispered, hands taking yours and guiding you to stand up. As if in trance you followed him, looking up at him with big eyes.

“You’re far more beautiful,” he continued, letting his hands glide up your body to your face. Was this actually happening? No, you had to be dreaming, there was no other explanation.

You had no words, you were speechless, and your mind was running wild. Is that why he chose you? Because he wanted a quick fuck? As if he couldn’t get anyone, he wanted but you would surely not cave and lose your job – wait would you lose it if you did not sleep with him?

“This is unprofessional,” you stated, trying to move your chair a little further away from him. However, your words only made the man smirk with a devilish glint in his eyes.

“Who is to say we should not do this? There is no one with more power than me doll,” he whispered, closer than he was before. He would be lying if he said he didn’t do his research on you and if he would deny how captive, you held him.

Your work stood out, you really seemed to care the people you interviewed and wanted to give the audience a look behind the curtains. Every other reporter he had before was full of themselves, proud to be interviewing the congressman and only getting what was necessary.

His agenda may or may not have been unprofessional. But who could blame him? You were the prettiest girl he had ever seen, it was remarkable, and he wanted you.

“I’m not sleeping with you, I’m not some girl you can use to get off,” you continued, trying to stand up but Bucky gripped your waist instead. Was this truly your life? Of course, James Barnes was a walking god, but this felt like a situation right out of a romance book.

He chuckled at that, he loved how you played hard to get. “Sure,” he nodded before pulling you flush against his hard chest, reflexively your hands flew against his broad shoulders.

“Prove me wrong,” he challenged you, then pressed his lips against yours, tongue gliding along your upper lip. Caught up in the moment you accepted his tongue into your mouth, his kiss was hot and filled with hunger.

It felt like he was swallowing you and you hated to admit how damn good he felt. Not only his aura was screaming dominance but also actions did as he lightly bit into your bottom lip to keep your mouth open.

You moved into him, hands wrapping around his neck. With a heavy breath Bucky broke the kiss, wearing a satisfied smirk, “you seem to quite enjoy this doll.”

In response you rolled your eyes, “it is highly unprofessional, you should know this,” you tried to keep your voice hard, in order to convince yourself to not fall further into his schemes.

Again, he didn’t take you seriously instead he placed hot kisses along your collarbone, and you couldn’t help but let out a whine by the way his slight stubble was rubbing against your skin. It was rough yet set you on fire.

“Does that normaly work for you?” he questioned in between kisses, suddenly you sensed pressure just above your pulse. The congressman was marking you up, like you were his possession.

“What?” you asked confused, eyes fighting to stay open as you gripped onto his hair. In response he shook his head, continuing his way down your cleavage. Meanwhile he let his hand slide up to the collar of your blouse and without hesitation ripped it open.

His actions pulled you from your bliss, gasping loudly, “I just bought this one!” “Please, I will buy you a new one if you’re so attached,” he rolled his eyes, slipping your blouse off and revealing your black lace bra.

God, you looked amazing, if Bucky wasn’t on a time limit, he would take the time to worship your tits properly.

“No, no, no, I told you this is wrong!” you let go of him and put your hands on his chest to keep a distance. You couldn’t let this go any further than it already had, but the man in front of you was so hard to resist.

“Doll, if it’s wrong than why does it feel like the right thing to do?” he whispered against the shell of your ear, resting his hands once again on your waist, however now you felt the contrast of his warm flesh hand and cold metal hand.

Letting his metal hand move down to your thigh, he lifted your leg to pull you closer to him. The way he manoeuvred your body made you feel his hard erection.

You whimpered in order to supress a moan slipping from your lips, “Mr. Barnes,” you argued. He knew exactly what he was doing, “I like the way you say my name, so be honest…if you’re so against this, then why are you reacting this way, mhm?”

“Come on doll, tell me,” his lips ghosted over yours before he hosted you up completely. “Sir…please,” you tried again, voice cracking as you tried to stabilize yourself.

He chuckled walking towards his desk, laying you down on the hard wood. “That’s what I thought,” he grinned, kissing down your stomach to your heated core. You thought you would explode, the congressman was about to pleasure you, the same man who you were scared would fire you.

“Let’s see if I really don’t have any effect on you doll,” you got goosebumps from the way his hot breath hit your skin. Bucky opened your trousers, pulling them down your legs.

He hooked his fingers around your panties, revealing how right he was. “Look at that, you’re fucking wet for the congressman,” he sounded taunting, but you would bet he was satisfied with himself.

However, his words only made this moment feel even dirtier than it already was. You propped yourself up on your elbows and suddenly realised you were completely naked yet the man in front of you wasn’t.

“Don’t you think it’s a bit unfair how you’re still fully dressed?” you questioned with raised brows, not knowing you could muster up this much confidence at the moment.

“Do you think this is any way to speak to me?” his tone became dark, throwing your panties across the room. With one sentence he destroyed your confidence, “I’m sorry sir,” you instantly apologized which played right into Bucky’s cards.

Smirking he shrugged of his blazer, loosened his tie and unbuttoned his dress shirt a little. It gave you a view onto his god-like chest.

“That’s a good girl,” he told you, pulling his tie over his head and stuffed it into your mouth. While it was extremely hot you felt a slight disappointment, “aww, don’t worry doll, you’ll get the chance to scream as loud as you need but not today.”

“Sadly, we’re on a tight schedule, so I will have to eat you out another time,” he said it like it was the most casual thing there was while you almost choked, there would be a second time?

His fingers traced along your cunt, spreading your juice over your skin, “feel how wet you are for me? And here you were saying that you didn’t want this,” he tsked, pushing his middle and pointer finger into your pulsing core.

You bit down on his tie, suppressing a moan and muffling his last name. Even in this situation you were too scared to say his first name.

“Squeezing my fingers huh, doll?” Bucky pulled his fingers from you and smeared his cock with your wetness. Then he undid his pants, letting his hard member free. Your gaze fell down to his cock, his leaking tip hitting his stomach.

You’d never thought you would say this, but he looked too pretty, and thicker than anyone you had before. “You’re so pretty,” you mumbled, your mind wasn’t function properly, so it didn’t even surprise you as those words left your mouth.

Bucky could barley make out what you were saying, he had an idea though and turned him on even more. With no warning he thrusted his cock inside your aching pussy, not caring if it hurt.

This time you couldn’t contain any sounds, you screamed loudly, clawing onto the wooden desk. “Feel me stretching you doll?” he smirked, pulling out but leaving his tip inside, just barley to tease you. Then he pushed in, with a hard pace he pummelled in and out of you.

You couldn’t help but clench around him, wrapping your lags around his hips which made him grin, “don’t want me leaving ya?”

Shaking your head you tried to keep the grip as tight as possible, he felt like heaven, he filled you perfectly and hit your sweet, sensitive spot in all the right ways.

His metal hand came down to rub circles on your clit, putting pressure on the sensitive bundle of nerves to drive you closer to your high. Given the fact he was still stronger than you, he had no problems moving with you pressing your legs against him.

In fact, it only made him enjoy it more. Your eyes rolled in the back I’d your head as you felt a shot if ecstasy crash through your nerves. Bucky was admiring how fucked out you looked, trying to hold onto one single though; him.

“I can feel you getting tighter doll, be a good girl and come...then you can milk my cock of every last drop,” he leaned down, whispering into your ear, flesh hand coming up to your throat to keep you in position.

“I can’t-“ you whimpered, it was too much, never before had you felt this much pleasure, never before was anyone able to make you come with his cock.

“You will, slut,” the congressman growled, demanded. This was exactly the man you feared just moments ago. Now you felt different, now you wanted to make him proud.

“Yes, sir,” you caved, letting everything happen, let the tight knot in your stomach explode. You tried holding onto his wrist, but your grip slipped.

With satisfaction Bucky fucked you through your orgasm, know it would push you even further into submission. He bit his lip, trying not to let out a strangled groan at the way you gripped him like a vice.

Seeing you have you climax made him sure to follow you suit, roads of white cum painted your swollen walls. It took everything in him to keep moving, to make you would get every last drop of him. “I could get used to being interviewed by you, doll,” he grunted, slightly tighting his hold on your throat.

Tears rolled down your cheeks, too overwhelmed with the situation. What had he done to you? Why did he give you an amazing orgasm ? What would happen now?

It was too much running through your brain, you just needed a nap, just for five minutes.... “Oh, doll, this was just the beginning.”

told ya, shit ending

[the-ancient-dragons]

Welcome back to Overcomplicating the Pyrrhian Tribes! This week: the beloved RainWings!!

You know what's up. Joy Ang and Tui are so cool and I am just me.

Details and explanation below!

Otherwise, next week are the chilly IceWings! See you then!!!

More overcomplicated dragons.

I knew the RainWings would be really important, and I think they turned out the best of all the ones I've done. I think they're my favourite because they are basically the perfect mix of extra realism spice without altering Joy's design too much. The SkyWing design is awesome and I love it to bits, but it is one of the two that are the farthest from canon.

As for the RainWing.... I had. So. Much. FUN. I heavily used chameleons and snakes - they're basically the two main species on my research board - but there is a dash of cuttlefish and frilled lizard in there. Where, you ask? Well if you look closely, all over the RainWing are little tiny flecks of darker colour. I found a beautiful reference of a close-up on a cuttlefish eye. Its skin is dotted in thousands of little marks and I thought that would be perfect for the RainWing, who can camouflage just as well as them. I don't know if it's been discussed in canon but I bet they could animate their scales more than just colour shifting - cuttlefish are known for using their rapidly shifting patterns to hypnotize prey. RainWings could do it too, sort of like Ka from Disney's 2D animated Jungle Book.

Speaking of Ka - snakes. I love snakes. The head structure of the RainWing here is very smooth and rounded with muscles based on snakes like the python. I was even going to originally draw them in a venom striking pose and got as far as completing the lineart, but ultimately decided it wouldn't fit the calm portraits of the other tribes.

Will you see it in the future? Hell yeah! Pure, unhinged, magical death spit. Looking at it now I might try to alter it to be a full piece of Glory attacking Scarlet or Crocodile.

In the striking pose you can see the frills much better, but I still took my time on this serene pose (this is where the frilled lizard influence comes in). If you notice that I've drawn every scale (every single scale) then, yes, I am insane. If you didn't know that yet, you know it now. You have to draw guide lines and follow them meticulously while you wonder why you don't make a scale brush, and then cry because you know the randomness and imperfections that come from drawing a thousand circles is how it looks natural. The eye area is actually my favourite part, since drawing dragon eyelids was the original inspiration for doing this. Did I mention that? I wanted to draw eyelids.

EYELIDS.

I digress. Besides the eyelids, I like the frills on the action pose, but this pose is where I like the body scales more. When zooming in on my chameleon colour refs, I noticed the very rhythmical distribution of their scales and figured I would give it a try. They actually do have extra large circular scales along their bodies, which is where I guess the canon RainWing design gets it from. Very clever, Joy!

Anyway, on this version, those small circular scales appear on the face. Not only that, but I added a bit of influence from the snouts of my ref chameleons by extending the nose bridges to wrap around the nose horn. They blend in so seamlessly and that's the reason why I love this design - it's subtle, barely there, mostly Joy but a little extra.

Wow, I talk too much. If you're here, thank you! It's not mandatory to read, but very appreciated. I heard once that visitors at an art gallery look at each piece an average of 2-3 seconds. Or was it 3-6? Idk, but it was shockingly short, and ever since then I've tried to encourage myself to pay more respect to other artists and glean their work for little details I skip after that quick glance. I could talk so much more about these designs but that would be like an hour long video, each, lol. If you have questions about anything, ask away!

[messenger-of-babel]

Doorstep Ghosts

Summary: Dick takes you into his apartment when you appear on his doorstep, unable to cope with the recent accident. (Dick Grayson x reader)

Word Count: 1.9K

Notes: Is this even angst anymore? I don’t know. I might have missed the mark a little bit. Warning for sensitive topics and alluded to mentions of suicide. Maddd survivors guilt. If you are triggered I’d suggest to avoid all together just in case. If you are feeling that way, please reach out to someone and call the panic line in your country. There's always someone willing to listen. <3

I had to try and research the difference of whump vs. angst and I still don’t fully understand so I’m just gonna run off of vibes. This might classify more as hurt/comfort actually. Waah idk. Much love, RiRi~ xx

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Since the accident, Dick had been keeping close tabs on you.

He had asked Tim if Red Robin could keep a tab on you, even though Tim had his own ordeals to handle back in Gotham. Bruce had even chipped in when Dick asked, transferring him some money so Dick could move you into a safer apartment. Dick hated taking Bruce's money, he could do fine without it, and quite frankly he didn't want to take what he hadn't worked for himself. However, when it came to your safety, he put that aside for a moment. He wasn't going to risk it, so within the week you were in a nicer part of Bludhaven with a state-of-the-art security system secretly set up to ping him if anything went wrong.

He had been so careful, so meticulous about making sure that you were okay that when you appeared on his front step one night, soaked through to the bone and dripping on his doorstep he was stunned. Your eyes were red rimmed and puffy, snot building in your swollen nose. Your arms hugged around yourself to bite back the chill of winter, hair matted to your forehead.

"Can I come in?" you sniffle, quaking. Wordlessly he steps back, arm opening to usher you in and shut the door behind you. His mind is reeling, unsure how you managed to find your way here, halfway across town, without him or anyone back in Gotham noticing. He frowns softly, pulling you into the living room and disappearing to find you a towel. Bringing two fresh ones back, he hands one to you and unfurls the other. Softly he begins to dry your hair while you wipe down the rest of your body, jacket peeling away and making a wet plop on the floor next to you. "It's unsafe for you to be out, especially this late at night. How did you even get here?" He murmurs, squeezing the water from your scalp.

"I took the train." you say back weakly, voice crackly from hours of crying. His frown deepens, fingers clenching in concern.

"You know the train is dangerous on the best of days. No way to get off or go anywhere if something escalates. Not to mention, only gangs use the rail this late. You know better, why didn't you call me?" he chides softly, flinching at the way you hang your head at his tone. he hadn't meant for it to come out like that, he was just concerned for your safety.

"I didn't want to bother you," you sniffle back. "Not to come get me."

"It worries me more when you don't let me come get you. If you wanted company, I would have come to your place-"

"No." you say firmly, towel wrapped around your shoulders and voice firm. "Anywhere but there, anywhere else just not-" you cut yourself off, biting on your lip harshly. He turns you to face him, hands soft as they grip your shoulders.

"No what?" he asks softly. "Come on sweetheart, you gotta work with me here."

"It doesn't feel like home. It's not-" you begin to break into a sob again, and he sighs while rubbing your shoulders.

Home.

He knows how badly you want to go home to your old apartment. The one you had moved into the very first day you set foot into Bludhaven and poured your heart and soul into. The one that you shared with your elder brother, or had.

"I know. But you can't go back there sweetheart," he murmurs, thumbs running small circles over your skin. "It's an active crime scene, and it's unsafe-"

"It's home." you say weakly, hands coming up to wipe at your eyes. "I just want to go home, want to go to my bed in my room."

"You do have a room," he tries to soothe. "I made sure we found you somewhere nice and big, where you can take the master bedroom and have all the freedom to do what you want with decorating it, just like you always wanted."

He can't stand the way his voice sounds so condescending, as if throwing money at the problem as going to make the wound in your heart heal over. He knew it couldn't erase the horrors that you saw or fix the gaping hole in your life. He knew it wasn't going to bring your brother back, but he couldn't find the right words to take the pain away.

"What did you come here for?" he asks gently, crouching down in front of you so he can meet your gaze, heart clenching at the way you hang your head to hide your face. "I've got the spare bed made, or you can share mine. I'll even sleep in the spare room if you want it to yourself, you know I've got the best mattress." He tries to make a teasing remark, but it wavers with uncertainty.

"I…I was thinking." you murmur, hands beginning to quake. His eyebrows furrow, hands coming to grip yours.

"Thinking?" he inquires softly, not liking the ton of your voice.

"If I had been me instead." you hoarsely whisper, making panic flare through his chest.

"It's lucky it wasn't." he counters quickly. "This wasn't your fault, and it wouldn't have made anything better. You're here still, and that means you keep fighting." he stresses, thumbs tracing the back of your hand.

"It wasn’t lucky for him though," you say, voice trembling badly. "It was my fault it happened; it was all my fault. I'm the one who took the photographs of the deal and gave it to him, I'm the one who said he needed to stand up to other police on the force, I'm the one who said he should try to go against the corrupt ones. He took my advice, and it got him killed."

"Sweetheart, no." he tries to stop your rambling. "Listen-"

"It should have been me." you finally sob. "It should have been me, I don't know how I'm supposed to just keep going when all I want is to be with him again." you cry, breath coming out in chokes and eyes clenching shut. Your hands shake in his grip, trying to catch your breath in between sobs. "I want so badly to see him again." you manage to whisper out, voice tight. "I wanna follow, I just want to go."

Dick stands to his full height upon hearing that, pulling you tight. He buries his face in your hair, one arm coming around your back to press you firmly against him, the other on the back of your head. "Stop that." he says firmly. "We don't talk like that; we don't give into those thoughts." His voice comes out stern, but the sharpness of his words is dulled by the panic they're wrapped in.

"I... I know…" you choke out. "I’m... I’m confused Dick. I was convinced but then I got scared about it and I-I…" you trail off, breathing becoming quick and broken by hiccups. "I ran all the way here. I'm a coward, but in that moment, I just felt-"

"Scared." he finishes softly, hand softly petting your damp hair. "You were scared."

You nod against him, sniffling into his worn sleep shirt. "I don't know what to do. I don’t know where to go, where to turn." you whisper fearfully. Dick tightens his arms around you, senses dulling around him as he focuses on you. The sharp intakes of your breath, the erratic ticking of your pulse. "You stay here." he says softly. "With me. You tell me when you're having those thoughts, and I'll make them go away. You won't have to be scared, not when you're with me."

"And when you're not with me?" you ask quietly. He frowns at that, pulling back slightly to look at you.

"Sweetheart," he says adoringly, the faint traces of a warm smile gracing his lips. "Even if you can't see me, I'll always be with you."

Your eyes water more, and you let your head fall forward again. "When you have no one else to turn to, don't forget that you can turn back." he murmurs gently. "Because I'll always be behind you. Always, every step of the way." you say nothing back for a moment, but he holds you as you shake.

"Why?" you ask softly, hiccupping.

"Because I love you." he replies instantly, and you look up at him. Your eyes ware nearly swollen shut from the amount of crying you've been doing, and quite frankly, a mess. "I love you." he repeats. "So don't you dare try to leave, okay?" his own voice wavers, eyes clouding with a sheen of concern. More and more under his soothing you begin to relax, until you're barely standing by yourself. He guides you to bed, helping you change out of the wet clothes and into some of his freshly laundered ones before slipping you under the sheets. He gives you your favourite side of the bed before following suit.

As soon as your head hits the pillow you're out like a light, hand still gripping his softly. He adjusts so he's comfortable, not letting your hand go. With a soft sigh he stares at your worried and beaten form, the worry lines that have formed on your forehead and the bags that have developed under your eyes. You look exhausted, with faint tremors even as your breath evens and you fall deeper into sleep.

He can't even begin to comprehend the horrors that you had seen coming back from work that night, entering your apartment as usual only to walk in on a gruesome scene like that. he had seen it himself, as Nightwing. He had only seen the aftermath though, once the body had already been taken away. He never got to see the body, never saw the carnage that undoubtably the mob had left behind. What he had seen though was the blood splatters over the wall, and the array of household items that were being bagged for murder weapons. He had seen the message scrawled on the wall, crimson letters dripping with a warning. He had seen you, sitting with the paramedics as you stared off into the distance, eyes unseeing as they draped a shock blanket over your shoulders.

He moved himself closer to you, pulling you into him. He wasn’t going to let something like that happen to you, not if he could help it. he was Nightwing, if anything, he should have the power to stop these things. However, the fear that it would slip through his fingers plagued the back of his mind, the nightmare of you fading away like your brother bouncing around painfully inside his skull. He couldn't bear to lose you, not to the mob, not to yourself. He takes a deep breath to try and control his own emotions, careful not to wake you up. As he exhales through his nose, he lets himself relax slightly, gently snaking an arm over you for extra protection. He doubted he'd be sleeping very deeply tonight, but it was the price he was willing to pay to keep you safe.

He'd do it every night for the rest of his life if it meant keeping you by his side, keeping the flickering flame in your heart alive.

He'd keep his arms around you till eternity ended, just so you could know that even if you didn't think you had anyone, you would know you had him.

That is the thought that finally lets Dick flutter into sleep quietly himself, room filling with the sound of the rain outside and the quiet duet of even breaths.

[ceedak]

can we get a ceedak timeline 🤔 i feel like there’s a lot idk abt them fr 😭😭

yes u absolutely can i could talk about them forever and ever 🥳🥳

disclaimer: i do wanna say this is just from what i’ve gathered because i didn’t become super fixated on nfl rpf until last year </3 one day i’ll do a legit deep dive like an insane person and update with all my findings…

second disclaimer: im delusional yes and a part of me straight up thinks that they’ve had to have hooked up at least once bc i love to psychoanalyze people i'll never meet but i’ll make sure to say when i’m being fully delusional KSDJFHSKDS

putting it under a read more because i’m sure it’ll be much longer than necessary

also i will reblog this and add links to some videos!!

SO before i get into like when ceedee was drafted and such i wanna talk about how invisible string coded they are because i love shit like this sm

both were born in louisiana only about an hour and a half apart from each other until ceedee moved to texas as a child after hurricane katrina hit (he’s said he’s moved around a couple of times as kid in interviews before)

dak went to mississippi st. in college and ceedee’s dream school was LSU (rival colleges… 🚬) but he had committed to oklahoma (also they wouldn’t have met or anything in college anyway because dak was drafted in 2016 and ceedee started playing in college in 2017 but i digress it makes my brain light up anyway lol)

when dak was drafted he was projected to go like late second round/early third round of the draft but 🗿 he got into some trouble beforehand (driving under the influence) and ended up falling to the 4th round (after the front office kept trying to trade up to get a different backup QB)

dak also had to compete for his spot as a backup and was named starter after romo was injured in 2016. this was dak’s rookie year and he led them to the playoffs - almost to the nfc championship game. after this he basically took the job from romo

okay so FAST FORWARD to the 2020 draft. ceedee was projected to go top 10 and he fell all the way to SEVENTEEN so the cowboys were able to grab him then (drafted bpa instead of for need)

idk all of this is just very <333 to me that so many things managed to fall into place just right and they managed to find each other on the same team out of THIRTY TWO teams it makes me weeeep 🤧 also just something else that i think is very cute because i truly am a little insane: ceedee was born april 8th and dak’s jersey number is 4 and ceedee’s is 88 so 4/8 ALL THE DOTS CONNECT SOMEHOW…

so we’ll go through a teensy bit about dak i suppose and then ceedee this won’t be too long

dak: baby of his family and has two brothers. his parents divorced when he was little and he was very close with his mom before she passed away in 2013 (he’s started a foundation since then for cancer research and suicide prevention/mental health). went to mississippi st, cowboys starter his rookie year, etc etc. he also lost his brother to suicide in 2020 and he’s said before he feels a responsibility to live on and carry his and his mom’s legacy throughout his life. he’s like suuuuuper underrated in the league i feel and a lot of cowboys fans are complete assholes to him all the time it makes me so mad cos they could literally never ever make me hate him - he makes me so weepy 😭😭😭 umm but yeah he’s donated a ton to children cancer funds too and donated during BLM protests and things like that - he won the walter payton man of the year award. he just had a baby and got engaged in october (remember for the yaoi LOL) ok im gonna stop here cause i don’t wanna rant too much lol

btw i know what you are dak prescott:

ceedee: MY BELOVED… my favorite my absolute favorite. he has two brothers and two little sisters. idk if he’s the eldest or not tbh i see different things all the time that he’s the second eldest whatever not that important i guess. so blah blah college blah blah - he wears 88 on the team because that’s considered really special to the cowboys franchise and is reserved for elite receivers. idk he’s the most beautiful man ever and he does a lot of donating too - i know he participates in a lot of football youth camps a lot to help kids out and he likes to provide meals to families around thanksgiving and christmas time. a loooot of cowboys fans have criticized him for not being that much of a leader and pouting a lot on the sidelines (which he does sometimes… my mimir) but i think this last season he’s reaaaaallyyy taken a step into more of a leader type position especially with dak being out and he’s proven himself more than enough. he LOOOVES spending money on clothes it’s so cute… gonna be a sad day when the class war happens and i’m faced with cedarian lamb. ummm i also legit think he’s gay and closet is made of glass but whatever

see this is the problem i never stfu but okay CEEDAK what you actually asked about ksjdksjdks

PRE-2020 SEASON: this was before ceedee was drafted (some stuff i found last night) and this is what i mean when i say i haven’t done like a deep dive into these things bc i’m sure there’s soo much more but this kinda gives the general vibes

“I was like a little kid at the playground,” CeeDee tells us. (on the first time Dak texted him to invite him over to his house, says it was surreal.) august 21, 2020

and i actually hunted the exact clip down where he says this: (will reblog with link - skip to 4:25 he talks for like a minute or so - sorry the audio’s funky it’s because of covid so all the reporters weren’t in the room i’m pretty sure) DELUSIONS: you can’t tell me ceedee wasn’t nursing a crush here idgaf

2020 SEASON:

ceedee’s rookie year

personal stuff happened with dak before the season started - this is when he lost his brother to suicide and he’s been really outspoken about mental health since then. on top of that he broke his ankle during week 5 of the season (and tried to snap it back into place by himself on the field). dak was performing on like a sort of insane level before the injury happened so </3 what could’ve been and all that… the what-ifs of it all… so that year they weren’t able to play together as much

Oct 11, 2020: “CeeDee Lamb said he texted Dak as soon as he got out of the shower. Thanked him for everything he’s done for him and they were gonna hold it down for him until they see him on the field again.” (after the game dak got hurt in)

POST 2020 SEASON:

"He came back from his second surgery about two months ago so he’s walking around, rehabbing, doing everything right," Lamb said Wednesday. "It’s great to see, especially when you seen him go down. You saw the look in his eyes and you saw how sad he was and how much this game meant to him. Just to see him smiling again, happy again, being with his guys is a great deal."

"First day he kind of caught me by surprise with his arm strength," Lamb said. "He knows the little nuances of the game to be better. He makes it easy to follow him, if you will."

2021 SEASON

ceedee’s second year, he was in a WR room with amari cooper (currently on the bills) and michael gallup (now retired) blah blah season happened whateverrrr but AFTER this season the front office (i’ll always be mad about this lol) traded amari to the browns for a 5th round pick 💀 hence THIS!!! which i consider the #Real beginning of ceedak:

“Dak Prescott asked for CeeDee Lamb’s locker to be moved next to his: ‘My two other locker mates left, so I was a little lonely. With him being young, hopefully he’s my WR until I’m done playing. Just bring him closer, more conversations, he’s right there to talk and communicate.’”

said he had no doubt ceedee could become his "main guy"

here’s some fun stuff i found from 2021 too

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=t3hCmIZN-YI&ab_channel=DallasCowboys (7 min mark this was after a game winning td in overtime against new england)

“CeeDee Lamb on game-winning 35-yard TD: ‘It was the best feeling ever, honestly.’”

2022 SEASON:

https://youtu.be/T73xGDsFiVo?si=Qn_dwK1yfnHPiMya talks about dak here at 7:50 “all i need is him” 🤧

he’s actually said this a couple times lol he says shit like “we’re all we got” about each other - he’s said it this most recent season too so <3

dak injured his thumb this season though so he was out for like 7 weeks i think i can’t remember off the top of my head lol but again another season where they didn’t get to play much together

fun 2022 stuff:

“Last year, Cowboys caked Dak in the face on the field for his 28th birthday. On his 29th today, CeeDee told us they planned to do the same in the locker room. Hoped Dak would think he was safe after no cake on the field, and then locker room ambush.”

“Scene here: Dak was talking to us at his locker. CeeDee walks past wearing metallic red lens sunglasses indoors and eating chicken. Says the key to following up ass-kicking is ‘keep kicking ass.’”

“Dak on CeeDee’s vibe: Yeah, cool as hell - says ‘keep kicking ass’ while he’s eating.”

“Dak Prescott walked by during our interview with CeeDee Lamb - QB1: CeeDee’s that dude! / WR1: Happy birthday, Dak!”

link posted in reblog: skip to 2:30 he almost says he loves dak lol also very

2023: THE SEASON OF CEEDAK!!!

https://youtu.be/7_WRIzb5fPA?si=R0TETc2qtW0IOP5P the infamous "was gonna take him out for dinner tonight" clip is from this aka what got me hooked on ceedak lol (this interview is just so good in general i love ceedee sm - def recommend watching! such a nice look at his personality)

this is where my delusions take over i deadass think they hooked up at LEAST once around this time lol maybe end of 2022 season maybe early 2023 season IDK but anyway during this year the offense was soo wack for a couple of weeks until the bye week and then ceedee made some noise about it bc he felt like he wasn't being as utilized (which is true i'm so serious mccarthy was SUCH an annoying coach lol) but quotes:

“Cowboys WR CeeDee Lamb said Dak Prescott approached him and said: ‘If you have a problem with anything, just come up to me and we’ll talk about it.’ Lamb said he and Dak worked on getting on the same page their first day back in the building after the 49ers loss.”

Dak: ‘I mean, a frustrated player that feels like we all could’ve done better and feels like he can change the game, I understand it. I really do. So it’s in the sense of just communicating with him… CeeDee is a guy that I’ll never lose confidence in and trust who he is and understand why he’s frustrated. But at the end of the day, he’s a leader. It’s about him leading other guys and picking other guys up and him just trying to make sure we’re all pushing our best. That’s where the frustration is, we have to remove that. And he will. He’s a young player that’s growing by the day and he’ll only get better. He’ll be better because of that.’

but after they switched the offense around dak and ceedee went craaaazyyy - ceedee was named all pro, dak was in mvp talks (should have won it to be honest i'm sorry lamar i still love you <3) but 2023 cowboys will seriously haunt me forever lol

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=sudQu72KDXs&ab_channel=NFLonFOX

DELUSIONS: dak announced he was having a baby like two weeks after this game SO let’s just say…. maybe…. perhaps… they were hooking up… ceedee probably knew before the public did - not saying that’s why he seems a little upset at the beginning of this clip cause who knows 🤷‍♀️ like i said DELUSIONS but… i can’t help it when the timeline timelines don’t shoot the messenger

also i do wanna mention that dak’s fiance follows a loooot of cowboys players on ig but she does not follow ceedee and he doesn’t follow her AGAIN just delusions…. but… iykyk 👀

sooo they were poppin off in 2023, ceedee was breaking records and shit, won nfc east, went to the playoffs and then i DON'T wanna talk about it i have my theories about wtf happened during that playoffs packers game but 💀💀 anyway the offseason before the 2024 season was genuinely the worst of my life because BOTH ceedee and dak had to get extended and jerry jones (who is the worst) waited until after training camp to get them both signed lol so ceedee wasn't participating in training camp at all which affected them in the beginning of the 2024 season which was a complete mess A MESS but here's some fun stuff after ceedee signed his extension/during that offseason

“Remarkable. That’s who CeeDee Lamb is. … He’s special. He’s just getting going and as long as I’m here, he’s gonna keep stacking these records year after year.”

“CeeDee Lamb strongly defended Dak: No one deserves the criticism that he gets. The way he gets talked about is crazy.”

2023-2024 OFFSEASON:

worst months of my life lol ceedee was holding out for his new contract and didn’t get it signed until like… august i think? anddd dak was signed fucking three hours before kickoff the first week of the season lol i HATE this front office

but here’s some fun quotes after ceedee was signed:

CeeDee Lamb: “We were texting quite a bit. Obviously I missed being out there, competing with him… for is being so in tune together and all it takes is one text message or one conversation, one phone call… for us both… having the same passion for the game, same love for the game. I want what’s best for Dak and vice versa. Shout out to him too for getting that bag, too. We’ll be together for the next five years.”

Dak Prescott on CeeDee Lamb’s added muscle weight: “He’s wearing a lot more sleeveless shirts. As long as the speed is there, and it looks like it is (in practice), I’m fine with however big he is.” LMAO??

Dak Prescott: “I peeped the biceps. He’s wearing more sleeveless shirts now.”

Dak Prescott recently on CeeDee Lamb: “He’s talented. He works hard. He’s special. He’s the best receiver in the league for a reason. And I’ve seen Instagram videos. I know you’ve seen him. He’s working. And he works hard. So I have no angst, no worries about when he gets here that we’re not going to pick up where we left off. And when you're a stud like that and you’re smart like he is and you’re good at communicating, that makes that process that much easier. So it’s not like we’ve got to build something. We’ve got that. We just got to reignite it when he gets here.”

on how much ceedee worked with dak at the field at dak’s house even though he was staying away from the team: “Often. I would say quite often. Anytime that I’m back in town, and he’s obviously back here, I hit him and then… it’s very… good having a rich quarterback.”

Dak Prescott’s thoughts on the tandem of him and CeeDee Lamb being compared to legendary duos like Joe Montana and Jerry Rice: “I think that says a lot just cause we’ve only done it for four years and you just named some of those duos that did it for their whole careers. But then again, I feel like we can be better than all of them… so love the comparisons, they sound good and all, but hopefully one day people are saying these next duos and next tandems can be like me and CeeDee.” (i will kms over this quote one day)

i’m sure there’s things i’m missing but this is already sooooo long lol so

2024 SEASON:

WORST SEASON OF MY LIFEEEEEE / ceedak angst era

the front office set this team up to fail and let like a ton of players walk in the offseason, didn’t use free agency, injury riddled team, had a bunch of rookies starting but anyway just gonna go game by game really quick because this is when i was locked tf in and it’s more recent so ?? more detail seems alright when it's necessary also i wrote so many half-finished post-game fics this season to cope with how terrible it was i’m cryingggg it was insane

cowboys vs browns: i was at this game :) good game they won

cowboys vs saints: blocked this game out actually!!!

cowboys vs ravens: fake ass comeback also the game ceedee CRASHED OUT on the field lskdjslkdjsskjdsk which is so funny bc i literally love lamar sm and was so excited to watch but… my players wanted to make me MISERABLE

this was said a day or two after the game by ceedee (bc he fumbled during it and then wasn't there for post game media people andddd was yelling at dak on the sideline 🗿)

“Our relationship has, if anything, gotten stronger. Don’t let what, what’s out there fool you. We’re brothers to the end. We know that we all we got, and I tip my hat off to him. I got the utmost respect for him.”

“So with that being said, everything is gonna come out - the energy, the passion, the love, the fight - and then we’ll make up in the end. So no, no craziness now. Don’t.”

dak also said something about his rhythm with ceedee being a “rare feeling” which… okay internalized homophobia but i CANNOT for the life of me find the actual quote i’ve searched through my gallery but it’s not there </3 if i find i’ll add later (i’m pretty sure it was after the baltimore game but i can’t remember)

cowboys vs giants: this is a tremicah game no need to mention ceedak idt - nasty ugly win but whatever

cowboys vs steelers: dak prescott giving me a heart attack 12 fucking times during this game

cowboys vs lions: don’t wanna talk about it! i’m a hater! always will be sorry!!! ben johnson statpadding on my sorry ass terrible team i was SICKKKKK

BYE WEEK: my trials and tribulations…. my nfl rpf…

CeeDee Lamb on getting in some extra work with Dak Prescott during their bye week: “We love our bye weeks. We took advantage of it. We got right. We used every opportunity to get better and I feel like it’s going to show. We got on some routes, and obviously the timing is everything. We needed that.”

now ummm this is the week dak got engaged so. which is really funny because after the announcement post on ig ceedee went GHOST on instagramksjdjks like i went back to check because i’m crazy (these are delusions btw) and he had been posting like once a week… maybe once every two weeks PRETTY consistently like for at least a couple of months but after the engagement happened there was pretty much nothing for like… almost two months?? ummm which AGAIN i’m not saying anything i’m not insinuating anything buuuuut…… buuuuut….. also it’s really fucking funny because in this same interview ceedee dropped that he left the country during the bye week but didn’t post it on socials at all so i’m like ohhhh… you’re coping w the engagement… i see LMAO anyway

cowboys vs 49ers: sigghhhh….. lets get into it

SO this was a loss but two ceedee touchdowns.. i’m leaving with something!!!

“Yeah, I found CeeDee,” Prescott said when reflecting back on Lamb’s breakout in the Bay Area. “He did a good job of getting open, running all of his routes hard no matter where he was, if he was the one or if he was backside on a concept. Loved his intentionality in the game. He kind of said something like that to me during the game, midway through the game, like ‘Yeah, we’re back.’ And that was before, I think, his two touchdown drives. So just him even playing with that confidence, communicating that, it gives me a lot of confidence.”

super hopeful right maybe they'll really connect again and things'll be fine LOL

cowboys vs falcons: worst game ever dak tore his hamstring off the bone like a fucking idiot and ceedee sprained his AC joint and would not stop going back out into the game i was ready to kms

cowboys vs eagles: not talking about it idc

cowboys vs texans: loss because ofc but whatever ceedak hugged before the game tho so i didn’t gaf about the loss - i can’t find the clip rn but if i do i’ll post it

cowboys vs commanders: this is when i accepted they were tanking and then they decided to just be elite for whatever reason lol made me so happy though ceedee was so happy <33

cowboys vs giants: whatever

cowboys vs bengals: worst fucking game of my life nothing to do with ceedak but one of my other fave player’s (i also ship him w ceedee idgaf) knee EXPLODED so that was so much fun to deal with

cowboys vs panthers: i still can’t believe bryce young decided to forget how to play football in this game im crying

cowboys vs tampa: again they just wanted to be elite for whatever reason

cowboys vs: eagles: don’t wanna talk about it idc

cowboys vs commanders: WHATEVER thanks for the 12th draft pick ashton jeanty you will be a cowboy

SO. that’s basically where everything's at lmfao worst season EVERRRRR with ceedak ANGST um but yeah hopefully 2025 will be better... i’m cautiously optimistic because their old coach is finally FINALLY gone because he was really limiting them and their ability you know? 2023 season was amazing and then 2024 started and it was like… mccarthy just reverted back to his old scheme that wasn’t working. it was really annoyingksdkskds. but the new coach (despite it seeming like a silly hire) had a decent press conference (that ceedee didn’t attend bc he was playing around in paris LOL) andddd he seems to be setting up a nice staff around him so hopefully hopefully hopefully 2025 is a lot better and ceedak will save me again… can’t wait for training camp omg

anyway if u read all this i’m SO sorry i hope it’s… expansive enough?? i wanted to include kind of how it’s been through the years and i had a lot more to add for 2023/2024 because that’s when my adhd was just like Yea let’s hyperfixate on this so. been stuck here for awhile and i’ll probably be stuck here for years and years and years <3

[mochinomnoms]

IM CRYING I GOT SICK SO I DONT FEEL WELL😭😭😭😭 Still I'll push through and get these Valentine's scenarios to you!!! You might get the other two a bit later tho so sorry!!!

Azul would definitely make sure to give you your gift first. He has done extensive research and came to Ramshackle with a bouquet of your favorite flowers! Though Valentines wasn't foreign to him, the way humans celebrated was a bit different! Then he'd take you to the town on the island, because somehow he got permission from Crowley!

It was with a bribe

........

At least you think so? But you got to go and have a great time on the rest of the island so who cares? He took you to multiple shops and then to the beach after. When you got back to campus you both went to his dorm. And it confused him to no end when you told him to wait while you ran off towards the dorms kitchen. He waited like an hour until you came out. He was a little annoyed but he couldn't go into the kitchen since the twins were keeping guard of the door as he heard sizzling. Hands down you enter the room with a, "Missed me?"

He'd question why you took so long but little did he know you ALSO did your research! Leading him to his own VIP room you'd explain nothing to him and watch as he blushed and tried to get answers from you. I mean why go to such a private room on such an intimate day? He's embarrassed even more as some other dorm members walk past him, a blushing mess, being tugged into his private office.

Not to mention your teasing the entire way there with hand holding and little pecks! He wouldn't say it out loud (7 forbid the tweels hear him) but he loves your affection just as much as it embarrasses him! And sevens, does it embarrass him!

When you get to the room the foods already set up! Courtesy of the twins. He knows the food was made by you, why else would you be gone for an hour!? and is kinda nervous for two reasons.

He's not too sure you can cook

2. Gifting food (for octo-mers) is usually part of their courting process

And I mean, yeah sure he's already dating you and everything but it feels really intimate! And it gets even more so when you lift the fork and bring it to his lips. (sorry to the people who CAN cook) But it seems Azul was right about questioning your culinary abilities.... Its kind of charred around the edges too, not a lot but to someone who's skilled at cooking its hard to not notice.

"Its burnt!" Azul laughs light heartily even though he still takes a bite.

"Yeah well its made with love, not skill," you reply sarcastically. As he eats his fill he makes comments about how he wants to avoid getting chubby, which you quickly dismiss saying you'd love him however he looked. To be completely honest he practically melts into your side on the couch. Its cute how shy he gets with this, and he seems to be leaning in more to your touch more.

Idk how to end this so HAPPY VALENTINE'S DAY!!! I hope you enjoyed and I'll finish the other ones soon!!

-✨👀

Happy Valentine's Day (late, sorry baby I got busy yesterday until night time)

This is so cute! I love it! Food is def my love language, so I would love cooking a meal for Azul!! It's such an intimate thing to hand feed your partner...Azulito let me feed you 😭

Thank you for the gift my love! I appreciate it! Maybe in the future I can write a series on food as a love language with the twst cast!

[fbisgayesttrio]

hi!

share your x files trans headcanons pls?

Yesssssss I could talk about Walter, Dana, and Fox being trans for hours🥰 not 15k like you wanted but I wrote a lot more than I thought I was going to😂🩵

Warning: this is a lot of me just me projecting my own trans experiences onto them so don’t expect accurate characterization

Fox: He just screams trans man and I know there are tons of other headcanons about him being trans out there. I feel like Fox realized he was trans when he was a teenager and transitioned, while he was away in England, for school. It’s definitely not something his parents accepted so he took the chance of being away from them, for four years, to start transitioning. By the time he came home, he had been on HRT and even had top surgery (let’s just pretend trans healthcare is a lot more accessible in their world). I think when he got home his family just ignored it, they never brought it up so he didn’t either. Ignoring things seems to be his family's way of dealing with everything. Considering the time period, I don’t think Fox is completely open about it at work, but it’s not something he tries to hide either. Fox isn’t someone who cares much about what others think of him so he still swims in the FBI pool, in nothing but his red speedo, because he loves being able to show off his body now🥰 Fox is also very comfortable with his femininity, he loves wearing dresses and skirts and definitely does drag once in a while. I kinda like Fox using multiple pronouns too, he uses he/him at work, but the people closest to him use they/them pronouns and neo pronouns for him.

Fox actually gets two scenarios, but this second one makes zero sense so just bear with me😂 I’ve always thought about what if Fox was born as Samantha and transitioned to being Fox. Like I said this one makes zero sense so idk how this would fit into losing his sister. Maybe he did get abducted and something the aliens did to him made him separate himself from Samantha, from himself, in his mind idk.

Dana: I haven’t thought about trans Dana as much as the boys, mostly because I’m a trans man, not a trans woman, but I do still have some headcanons about her. Dana was raised Catholic and I know from experience how hard it is to realize you're trans when you grow up in a really religious environment (this is where I get to project a bit😂), so I think it’s something she had a hard time coming to terms with. I think Dana realized she was trans in medical school. Maybe it was something they talked about, in one of her classes, and she just couldn’t stop thinking about it after, kept researching about and reading the stories of trans people, just trying to figure out why she related to it so much. She finally starts realizing why she always felt so different from her brothers, growing up, and why she never fit in with all the boys at school. I think she starts out small, maybe just buying herself a dress to see how it feels or trying on some makeup at home, but once she realizes how right it feels and decides that’s who she really is, she goes all in. Coming out to her parents doesn’t go great though, they don’t understand and it takes years for them to start properly gendering her and using her new name, if they ever do. But she doesn’t let their opinions stop her from being herself. I think she’s a lot more private about being trans than Fox is, only the people closest to her know.

Walter: I can see Walter as either a trans man or a trans woman, but I think for both it’s a similar scenario of how he realizes it. As much as I love out and proud Walter who has always known he was trans I feel like that’s not the most likely scenario. I think he didn’t realize he was trans until much later in life. I think it’s after he meets Fox and Dana, maybe even not until the three of them start a relationship. After listening to them talk about their experiences being trans he realizes how much he relates to them.

For trans woman Walter I’m gonna go with the name Wendy🥰 I think she’s always felt more feminine, but she tried so hard to hide it. Constantly worked out to make herself as masculine as possible, joined the Marines and then the FBI because they were “manly” jobs. I think she did realize she liked men while she was in Vietnam, but even then she tried to justify it as the stress of war and the drugs she was taking. She probably managed to push it all down and not think about it until she started seeing Dana and Fox and then all those feelings came rushing back and for the first time in her life she finally understood them. I think she’d be really scared though still and it would take her a long time to even tell Fox and Dana. She might even try pulling away from them, scared that they will find out. Somehow convinces herself that they wouldn’t want her anymore, it’s fine for them to be trans, but not her. The two of them would give her space for a bit, but eventually demand to know what’s going on. After that they would be extremely supportive, encouraging her to explore her gender. I think Wendy would eventually come out at work, but it would take a long time. She would worry about how it was going to affect her career. At first, it would just be at home, with Dana and Fox, until she’s completely comfortable as her new self. Just imagine Dana and Fox buying her her first dress and her nervously modelling it for them🥺🥰

For trans man Walter, I think he had always considered himself to be a tomboy. He did as many sports as he could in school, loved weight lifting and even though he couldn’t join the Marines he still got into the FBI. After he comes out Fox gets his old binders out of storage and gives them to Walter. As much as I think Walter would look gorgeous with top surgery scars I can’t stop thinking about how good he would look in only a binder. Or Dana and Fox helping him tape his chest for the first time (that shits so tricky to use). I’ve also thought a lot about Walter starting to go bald after he starts testosterone and how self-conscious he would feel about it. Every version of Walter is the king of self-doubt to me, he’s never understood why Dana and Fox are into him, in the first place, and that would just make his self-doubt about their relationship even worse. They would defeinityl show him just how much they like him bald tho🫠

Some bonus ot3: imagine all three of them helping each other take their hormone injections. Honestly, Dana would probably insist she gives both the boys their testosterone injections. Or if any of them had surgeries, the other two would take such good care of them, while they reecover. 

Alex: He's actually one of my only faves that I don't see as trans (he's definitely queer tho), but now you've got me thinking about how good he would look with top surgery scars. It’s probably just that fact that we don't know anything about his backstory and very little information about him as a person, that I just don't know how to fit it into his characterization.  

Hopefully at least some of this makes sense🥰

[snorlaxlovesme]

what is your favorite line/section of your sick CXS fic? It is so good and I love when authors can share some of their thoughts!

i feel so spoiled with these messages from you, thank you for being so kind my godd

(aforementioned sickfic)

it's hard to choose favorite lines bc genuinely i do love the whole fic so much. a lot of the time i'm writing off the cuff and it just flows out of me in one or two sittings (it's why i'm a one-shot writer) but this was a story that took me months to complete because of all the planning involved (and absolutely fruitless research into Chinese herbal soups, since literally NONE of that research made it into the fic lmao) and so the whole thing feels really special and different from my other stories just because of how much thought was put into it.

it took a long time, but i adored writing the second half, getting to write the same day over again and try to make it identical while FEELING totally different. having Lu Guang totally in pieces over every little change he accidentally makes to the timeline was mwaa *chef's kiss*

i think my favorite line was what i eventually pulling from to make the summary on AO3

"Lu Guang is so tired. He wishes he could freeze this conversation, this whole day, and go nap for a thousand hours. The stress of it all is sucking the marrow from his bones. He wishes he could do today over again. He doesn’t know if he’d have the strength to do today over again."

idk i just feel like it really encapsulates the struggle Lu Guang goes through in this fic and might literally go through on a day to day basis trying to re-live the timeline. like i'm sure every misstep feeling like something Lu Guang would want to do over, but how many times can he handle that, emotionally? like this day mentally broke him and it's literally the most nothing day. Lu Guang forgot to make one phone call and almost suffered cardiac arrest because of it.

plus its very sweet that Cheng Xiaoshi, sick as a dog and feeling down on himself for being left alone all day, comforts Lu Guang after this moment because he can see Lu Guang is going through like a panic-induced existential crisis and mistakes it for Lu Guang ALSO feeling ill, sweet boy ♥

i also really liked the simplicity of these lines (it includes spoilers so look away if you wanna read the fic first. )

But Lu Guang thinks of the tear-streaked smile after Cheng Xiaoshi took that first bite. Spending every waking moment agonizing over his next step won’t get him anywhere. Instead, Lu Guang folds up that smile and tucks it into a corner of his mind for safekeeping. Cheng Xiaoshi thanked him for today. Maybe that is enough.

that part wasn't in the original draft. these lines are in response to CXS thanking Lu Guang for caring for him and i think i had a bit of prose where LG internally laments that he spent half the day ignoring CXS and only took care of him when it was clear Qiao Ling wasn't going to be able to, so the thanks wasn't really deserved. or something self deprecating like that

i had sent my "final draft" to a friend after revising some bits in the flashback and said "i wanna post it but i feel like i need to mess with the ending still. it feels off" my friend insisted what i had was great but i didn't know if the last line of the fic ("Timeline be damned") felt earned. Lu Guang had been a slave to the timeline for the entirety of the story, allowing him to kind of/sort of say "fuck you" to the timeline for a brief moment felt like it was going against everything i had just established, of how IMPORTANT keeping to the timeline was to Lu Guang for the sake of being able to save Cheng Xiaoshi in the future.

it was my friend that gave me the idea to write a simple thesis line that shows what Lu Guang has learned from this. that disaster is definitely a potential outcome in Lu Guang's crazy plan, but seeing Cheng Xiaoshi at peace is enough to make him want to try. like you said in your comment on the fic, if you went back in time, you'd want to be kinder. those lines are Lu Guang reminding himself that seeing CXS at peace has an emotional effect on Lu Guang as well.

ALSO idk the "fold up his smile and tucks it in his mind" bit is cute okay? it's a very cute sentence and i'm proud i wrote it lol

this is very long so i'm gonna stop rambling but again THANK YOU so much for asking me this and for all your sweet messages. i truly can't get over how wonderful it's been talking about this story with you, it's only made me love it more and i already thought it was my magnum opus lmao

[lilaclaufeyson]

Tolerate It

trigger warnings: anger? I tried to make this gender neutral bc there’s no description of the reader. angst, a bit of anxiety idk lol thanks for reading

You had planned this dinner out for weeks. Every detail was planned out, down to the color of the napkins. It was your second anniversary, and you were delusional enough to believe he could propose. You had taken the time to research Asgaridian dinner traditions and superstitions. You had gone out and bought gold plates, cups, and silverware. You wanted everything to be perfect for him. You dressed in your best green attire.

You took hours, days even to prepare dinner and dessert. The candles you bought were his favorite scent, and were placed strategically around the dining room to provide just enough ambient lighting. Everything was set and ready. Everything was perfect. And so you sat, waiting at your end of the table, waiting. Every second felt like eons, dripping past as slow as honey.

Half an hour passed similarly before Loki passed through the front door of your New York City flat. He was dressed in his usual black two-piece suit. You shot up immediately, smiling wide as you made your way to see him. He was toeing off his shoes to the shoe rack you kept by the door. The front door opened to the living room, and then an archway to your dining room as well as your bedroom on the other side. He only looked up as your arms wrapped around him, beaming. He glanced at you, not returning your smile for more than a second.

“Welcome home, don’t you look handsome.” You coo at him. He moved away from you to move towards the dining room. He sighed.

“What have you cooked tonight?” He asked, and paused before continuing, “I surely hope it is still warm. I am sorry to have kept you waiting.” He sat down then at the opposite end of the table. You hurried over, unveiling the dishes in the center of the table in lieu of an answer. You were beaming, a nervously excited smile graced your face.

“Only some of your favorites, from home. I hope they are good.” You knock into the corner of the table on your way back to your seat. You glance up at him to notice the irritated crease form between his eyebrows briefly. He slowly starts to put some food on his plate, silent the whole time. The anxiety of cooking the foreign food mixed with his silence is eating you alive. He hadn’t even realized you were dressed up yet. You figured he had had a hard day at Stark Industries.

You get a plate only after he has started eating. It is quiet for a couple minutes, save for the clink of silverware hitting your plates. You are eating slowly, the cuisine is good enough for you, but not your favorite cup of tea. The silence was killing you, so you spoke up.

“How was your day?” Your voice felt too quiet in the silence, cascading through the air like a leaf in autumn.

“Twas fine. Passed just as any other day.” He replied, his tone short. It had taken him a moment to respond because he finished chewing first. You just nodded in response. He did not seem like talking. You pushed what was left of your meal around your plate, your appetite slowly dwindling. Did he not even remember what day it was? A handful of quiet moments pass before you notice he is starting to get up. He left his napkin by his plate. As he passes by you to get to the bedroom, he kisses the top of your head.

After he leaves, you feel the tension uncoil from your spine. You sagged in the chair like a rag doll. A deep breath in and out occurred before you got up to clean up. You binned up all of the leftovers before hand washing each dish. You dried them after you were finished and put them back in the cabinet you allotted for them. You put the untouched dessert in the fridge. Lastly, you blew all of the candles out. You sat back down in the dining room, elbows on the table and head in your hands.

You do not know how much time passed, but Loki was soon back out of the bedroom, freshly showered. You jumped a little, spooking out of your stupor. He sat down on the couch, glancing at you with some philosophy book in his grasp. The watch on his wrist paired with the plain white t-shirt, sweatpants, and his black wet hair pushed back was devilishly handsome. You sighed, thinking about how you used to be able to curl up next to him while he read on the couch, laughing about his boring reading preferences.

“What are you all dressed up for, darling?” He had just opened the book, looking away from you. Your breath caught in your throat, a few tears slipping right down your face almost instantly. No sounds left your body, but you turned to look at him. How dare he pair that sweet endearment with such harsh words. You just looked at him while tears continued down your face.

His book slammed shut after your continued silence. “Now what could you ever be crying about? You had the day off,” He scoffed, mumbling something. You gulped, wiping your face.

“You don’t remember what today is, do you?” You asked, voice unwavering despite the tears. The sadness in your veins was being replaced with anger. He furrowed his brows at you.

“It is only Tuesday. Have I missed something?” He asked, his voice slowly filling with anger. You huffed, standing from where you were previously sitting. “It is only Tuesday?” You hiss, arms crossing over your chest. “Only Tuesday? It is only our second anniversary!” You raised your voice, but not quite to a yell. He seemed to think, but only for a second before he also stood.

“Two years is almost nothing to a God, (y/n). I have roamed this very universe for hundreds of years!” His hands flew wildly in frustration. All emotion leaves your body to refill with dread before he continues, “You try doing as I do every day and remembering what day of the week it even is!” His voice is louder than yours, you realize. He was always the one who remembered the anniversary of your first kiss or the day you moved in together. Your breath seemed to escape your lungs all in one go.

“Nothing to a God,” You mumble, “alright, I must go. I think we need to spend some time apart, Loki. I’ll be back tomorrow to pack my things.” You back up, heading towards the bedroom to pack some things. You realize he doesn't try to stop you. How could he not even realize when he was wrong?

You called your friend, asking if you could stay the night. As you carried your bag to the living room and towards the front door, you glanced back at Loki. Savagely, Loki was sitting back down on the couch, reading like nothing had happened between you two mere minutes before.

[wildcardsoul]

a more in depth background of my persona 3 oc...

the one linked here! It's a lot so its gonna be under the cut but it's much more than what i had before!! idk how many will see this but it would be so cool and awesome if you read it because these two give me such intense brain worms i need to tell everyone about them (will include p3 spoilers)

touma hiroya was born as a surprise to an, all things considered, normal family. a mom, dad, and a brother, teijo, 10 years his elder. his family was not expecting another child but welcomed him anyways

the pregnancy caused a lot of complications, but they thought they were in the clear during his birth, unfortunately more issues arised and his mother passed away shortly after, devastating the others. a new life was brought into the world but at the cost of another.

both grew bitter towards the newborn, silently blaming him for the death of the mother. it took until his father shouted at the now-toddler for teijo to realize how foolish he was being. touma was completely innocent.

but things only got worse as time went on, their father having resorted to drinking since the passing of his wife and quickly developed an addiction. obviously i wont be going into abuse detail but their situation gets Bad, but teijo always makes sure to protect touma always

he manages to get accepted into a college, with an insane amount of hard work he is able to gather enough money to get an apartment and take in touma, pretty much raising him. teijo finds himself leaning more towards science, while touma starts picking up his medical books

years pass, now roughly 20 and 30, teijo gets himself into the kirijo groups scientists, and touma is in medical school. all things seem to be going well for the two, teijo sending touma extra money to support him every once in awhile.

that is, until, again, things take a turn for the worse. teijo gets sucked into the deeper parts of the group, seeing the experiments theyre doing on the shadows, and worse, people. but hes too far into the group now he cannot back out without being in danger

it becomes obvious, though, how he hesitates. and soon enough they turn on him. they realize teijo has a strong potential, and try to force-summon a persona from him. it works, but he is unable to control it, and his own persona kills him.

touma is clueless. he stays clueless, it wasnt uncommon for months to go by without hearing from his brother, he is busy after all. then the accident happens, the explosion. he is told his brother died there. and hes alone in the world.

touma tries to go on, tries to keep going in school but he struggles. he finds himself skipping classes, sleeping in, after some years he runs out of money, he has no choice but to drop out. he tries getting jobs, but none last too long. a few more years and hes out of money and jobs that will accept him. unable to afford his apartment anymore, hes stuck wondering the streets. its now he discovers the dark hour, terrified of it, but able to use it to his advantage. he felt awful, breaking into places and stealing, but he would starve otherwise.

its on fateful day that he is found. he had fainted on the street during the dark hour, after not having had enough to eat the day prior. shuji finds him, clothes torn and dirty, trying to get him to awaken. after a bit, he does.

during this time its early spring, a month or two after makoto had joined SEES. seeing the potential in touma, shuji decides to, at the very least, help him through the night. he can see what else can be learned about him, if he'll be useful to his cause.

after bringing him to his home, getting him showered and fed, they talk. shuji realizes he's heard of touma before, the younger brother to one of the scientists. it feels like fate, his brother had an extremely strong persona, if touma was any similar, perhaps he could be useful

if things were handled differently. with the plan in mind, shuji offers him to stay with him at his home. he even pulls some strings and allows touma to be an assistant nurse at the school.

months pass, and touma never awakens to his persona. but its alright, he is proving himself to be extremely useful by having the medical knowledge he does, helping out the kids after tough fights and long tartarus trips.

touma is EXTREMELY grateful towards shuji, feeling as if he saved his life. during those months he can't help but find himself falling for him. sure, it helps he saved him, but he genuinely adores shuji. he finds him so charming and funny, he feels like a schoolboy with a crush

meanwhile shuji is finding himself feeling the same. which complicates things a lot. he can't have feelings for someone right now! the world is destined to end, its unworth saving, theres no point in dealing with love. he tries to keep up appearances but shuji is stressed as hell

hes in heavy, heavy denial he could love someone in this cruel of a world, trying to find any reason to justify it. and he does. it all makes sense, why the pieces would fall into place so neatly. touma was destined to be the avatar of nyx. it was so clear!

shuji would be the god of the new world, with touma by his side to help bring it to fruition. no other reason would he be so drawn to him, right? so his plan continues in motion, until all 12 arcana shadows are defeated, and shuji starts his plan.

touma watches as someone who he loved betrays him, betrays them all. he tries his hardest to reason with shuji, to beg, to plead to listen to him, that killing these kids he cares for won't do any good, that the world is still worth saving, but shuji's delusions have taken over

shuji raves about how this is destiny, how this is what they wanted, right? to be together, and they will be, with the creation of the new world everything will be perfect. and the rest plays out in canon, aigis saving everyone, and shuji getting shot.

despite it all, the betrayal, touma still loves him. as shuji walks backwards towards the edge of the roof, touma runs over to him, trying to save him from falling, but it's too late at that point. shuji had fallen. without a second thought touma goes after him.

he doesn't think about it, if this is how he dies..then let it be. he'd rather die with shuji than live with losing someone else he loves. through the rush of doom, its finally now touma's persona awakens, eos, the goddess of dawn.

touma, who had managed to grab hold of shuji's hand, pulls him closer against the wind, and with eos' wings they're able to safely make it to the ground. what i have after this is pretty..up in the air, but pretty much it comes to shuji realizing he was fucking crazy and a LOT of therapy. a lot. touma and shuji stay away from the kids for awhile because..well they kind of doubt theyd want to see them. again still nothing concrete after this but. they end up being okay one way or another.

this is just like. toumas in-canon story how it would go In Canon but i also love pretending everything is fine and that theyre silly and in love but also ouch ouch ouch ouch they hurt me to think about sometimes

also sorry if not all of this makes a lot of sense within canon its been awhile since i beat the game.. but uaugh. augh. uahg. they mean so much to me.

heres a little lamb touma doodle for ur troubles <33 i doubt it but if anyone has any questions PLEAAASE ask me i need to talk about themmmm

[itsmelloww]

I'm a plant mum now 🌿🪴 (im so stressed)

I'll keep a little diary of my experience so far because to say that i am STRESSED and feeling like a helicopter parent would be an understatement.

What I'm working with:

Alocasia Jacklyn (MY plant)

Winter Cherry (soldier with trauma)

Winter Cherry Jr (unexpected pregnancy)

Jade Plant (unbothered queen)

Jade Plant Jr (currently exiled cause wtf im sick of this brat)

Ok so-- background:

My dad's a gardener, loves greenery. Mother's the same (minus gardener part) ; growing up? you couldnt WALK through our balcony cause it's like a jungle; sooo many plants.

Now, my mother has 3 plants which she's given to me now that i've moved into my new place:

Her Jade Plant (big), Winter Cherry (growing big) and this snotty ass Jade Plant that's been problematic its whole life yet refuses to die (which is amazing but point being its just dramatic)

---

Anyways, i LOVE plant as well but never really paid attention to my mums plants.

----> Introducing my Alocasia Jacklyn:

Chatting up with this guy at work who loves plants and he was showing me and i love greenery so i was like omg!! maybe i should get a plant too. And he said now that i have my own place i HAVE TO.

So I did.

Tip 1: Please DO YOUR RESEARCH before buying, and don't rely on the description and 'requiremnts' on the website, cause omfg.

Bought my little 12 cm Alocasia and she's stunning but I'VE BEEN STRESSING. I check on her like 1000000 times during the day, i know she's SICK OF ME. But the paranoia is so real i live in fear of her dying on me. have had her for a week and i think she looks good but omfg.

But anyways, since i got her now I've gotten the bug so been learning about plants and been taking care of the rest of them and omfg??? how are these plants alive????

Our Winter Cherry is growing STRONG, then next thing i know i find out he's SEVERELY root bound. I spent 3 hours yesterday trying to repot. But seriously, how has that thing survived this long?

Anyways, here's my little thoughts/diary on each plant:

1. Alocasia Jacklyn 🌴 🍃

Bought her off House of Kojo. Came in looking like a million bucks, i mean, the two big leaves are also opposing each other shes a stunner, but then she began to droop and i had a million heart attacks

Repotted her on day two on a special alocasia mix and shes been looking better since

I found what i identified as a thirp?? POTENTIALLY?

I killed it, and havent found anything ever since, but i check every day cause i AM ANXIOUS. Been 3-4 days now of nothing. Still i'll probably be checking daily until im 50

Got Neem Oil which btw -- NOONE could have prepared me of how BAD that shit smells oMFG. GAG.

GOT A NEW LEAF THO! COMING THROUGH! I hpe its healthy

The stems felt a bit soft yesterday but firm today so idk wtf that's about

Has a bit of damage from the shipment but shes beautiful anyways

Has such healthy roots bless her and these cute little... corns? whatever theyre called dont remember now

Repotting was actually so much fun to do i really tooK my time researching about it and doing it right.

I genuinely live with anxiety every day noone understands how freaked out i am ill fail her SHES MY FIRST PLANT BABY 😭

Everyone says you kill your first plant and im already mourning her even though she seems to be doing ok

2. WINTER CHERRY 🍒🌿

I love this plant. It's my mother plant but it's such a charming little thing. And ever since he (dont ask me about genders idk) moved in with me hes been growing so well, we're getting all these new bright green foliage and flowers and then cherries constantly. its insane how much hes grown.

I also once forgot to water him for long (yah i know...) and he dried up then i watered him and he came back to life within 15 minutes like nothing ever happened like hes a TROOPER.

But then, because ive been learning about plants through my Alocasia, i started paying attention to him and noticed his soil was super stiff? then i raised the nursery pot and realised there were roots growing out of the drainage holes and i thought --- not good.

My mother agreed he needs repotting but she kept forgetting to do (my dad would spit on our face honestly if he knew)

So i thought to do it!! Got a new nursery pot, did the soil right then prepared myself to repot him!!!!! ---- And then it took me 3 hours of doing so 🤡🤡🤡

Those roots were ROCK HARD. I was STRESSING. Clumped, honestly horrific. I was frantically googling --- in the end i let them soak on lukearm water, and spend literally hours massaging the roots loose and breaking apart the solidified soil. Honestly hard breaking.

The roots were so healthy though. Only 1 or two that were brown and mushy which i cut off. Then i repotted the baby after i managed to get most of the roots loose. But I am really really worried --- i really worry i stressed the poor thing out

I kid you not if it dies after repotting him and after hes been surviving so well on his own ill cry. I really did my best though! I literally spent HOURS working on that bound ☹️

well see.

3. Winter Cherry JR 🍒👶🏻

This feels like when you're already having kids and it's stressful then you find out you're pregnant again.

SOMEHOW we got a baby? I found a lot of broken down cherries tbh, so clearly it grew from the seeds (rereading this now -- duh??). which is so cool! I worry though (this is a pattern atp).

Idk how to raise a baby. but for now i've repotted it and monitoring it but i don't have the best feeling haaahh

Have him now on a tiny nursery pot (dont have a pic of it). We'll see.

4. Jade and Jade JR 🪴

No pictures here cause i'm not bothering with this.

The Big Jade Plant is thriving on neglect. I water when it needs it, then do nothing and it keeps growing bigger and bigger.

Honestly, i am TOO stressed to be concerned.

Meanwhile, Jade jR?? That thing is SICKLY. A pale green. I raised it to my mother, and she said that's how he's always been since he was a baby. Yet he keeps growing. Honestly i can't worry too much atp, so i let him be. I'll keep an eye out though.

Anyways, idk. I love plants. I am not giving up!!!!!!! I am not joking when i say i am stressed, but at the same time i really care about these plants.

My Alocasia HATES me i though i know she groans when she sees me squat over her for the 2380238th time of the day.

But we'll see!! I'd love to get more plants, but ill def be more careful and get something easier perhaps. sigh.

If anyone has tips btw, pls share. im begging.

[flecks-of-stardust]

[image description: a picture of my headcanon for hallownestian script. the writing is divided into three columns, with one line of text across the top. the top line of text is a note on what phonemes are present in the hallownestian language. the phonemes are separated by a vertical bar. to its left is: ah, ee, oo, uh, ai, ay, oh, au/aw, eh. to its right is: ch, c, z, s, l, m, n, p, k, f, g, d, b, j, h, t, th. 'c' is crossed out.

the first column has the vowel sounds of the script. from top to bottom, the corresponding sound, and then the relevant symbols are: ee/i/y: a circle. next to it in brackets is an indication that this character is sometimes written as a spiral, roughly resembling a circle, but with the top right part of it broken into a small swirl. ai/i: the number 6, slanted to the left, with an extra protrusion connecting to the circular part of the number. an alternative to this symbol is a slightly clipped version of it, trimming the top part of the '6.' ah/a: the number 6, rotated 90 degrees anticlockwise. oo/o: one line comprised of two sections. the top half is a curved line, striking from left to right, curving out towards the top right. it connects to a sideways, laterally flipped 's' shape. an alternate way to write this character is to extend the 's' shaped part of the character back into itself, so it creates a loop. ay/a: two half circles, interlocked at their zeniths and tilted so the open ends face the upper right and lower left. a note next to it remarks that they may be symmetrical oh/o: reminiscent of a simple bird leg, with the toes facing the top left. it is also comprised of two half circles, but less curved than the previous. this character is sometimes written with the curves accentuated, so it looks like a laterally flipped c embedded in an upside down u. eh/e: a slightly slanted number 6, leaning to the left. sometimes this character is written with an extra curl at the top, giving it the appearance of a stapler clip. au/aw: an 's' rotated 90 degrees anticlockwise, with the top part of the letter curling in on itself to form a circle. the shorthand of this character is written more loosely, so the character does not form a full circle. it also remarks that it is similar to an arcleomen letter. uh/u: similar to the letter 'g', with an extra curl at the base. the shorthand of this character is the letter 'g.' oi: the number 9 with a laterally clipped c intersecting its stem. schwa: a dash, or a dot. the text next to it remarks that sometimes it is written with a circle on top of a dash for easier recognition. ih/i: the number 3, stretched with a loop in the center, with a circle attached to its right side. text at the base of the column notes that there is no c or r in the script.

the second column has the consonants of the script. from top to bottom, the corresponding consonant, and then the relevant symbols are: l: a slightly curved line, bowing out to the right, intersecting the top of a circle. the shorthand for this character is a very stretched out number 3, with the top section straightened out. p: a c intersected by a laterally flipped number 9, tilted slightly to the right. sometimes this character is written so the 9 intersects a straight line. next to this row is a note that adding a dot to this character alters it so it produces the b sound. n: similar to a slanted capital J, with the stem poking out the top of the letter. a note next to it remarks that some may abbreviate the character to having the curved stem only and replacing the horizontal line with a dot next to it. a note below that indicates that adding a dot to this character alters it so it produces the m sound. ch: lower case d and c pressed together. an alternate way to write this is a loosened lower case d, more akin to a spiral, with a circle pressed into its side. t: a widened c with a circle set into the hollow of the letter. a stylistic way to write this character is to put a circle inside of a larger circle. k: three quarters of a circle, cut open at the top left, intersecting the middle of a circle. a stylistic way to write this character is to draw two interlocked circles, one on top of the other. f: one line comprised of two sections. the lower part of the character curls, then strikes up. the upper part curls in on itself, swirling around to form a circle. it is not always connected into a full circle. next to this character is a note that indicates adding a dot to this character alters it so it produces the v sound, though it is more like a harsh f. s/z: a laterally flipped c intersecting with the number 6 at its zenith. the shorthand for this character is the number 6, with a tick intersecting its stem. below it is a note that adding a dot to this character alters it, making it a stressed sound, similar to the z sound.d: a c intersected by a circle at the base of the letter. a note next to it remarks that it is similar to the character for t h: a tilde, stretched and pulled slightly upwards on the left. sometimes the character is rotated 90 degrees, so it is a vertical line with two curves at each end. g: two lines, somewhat similar in appearance to the number 6 flipped sideways and elongated with a tick through its stem. the base of the character has an extra protrusion connecting to the loop of the 6, similar to the character for ai/i. a note next to the character notes that some may abbreviate it to a spiral, slanted to the right, with a dot next to it. j: a curly w. a note next to the character notes that some may write it as a regular w from the english script. w: similar to a cane, with an uptick at the top end of the line. alternatively, the character may be written like the lower case c, with an uptick at the top end of the line. y: an upside down u, with the left stem attached to a circle. the shorthand for this character is similar to a curly number 2, stretched and leaning to the left. th: a laterally flipped capital S, with the end of the line attached to a circle. a note next to it remarks that it is a blend of t and h. sh: a laterally flipped capital S, with the curved part attached to the zenith of the lower case c. the c has a circle attached to the lower end of the line. alternatively, the character may be written so the c and the circle are joined on the same line, forming a slanted spiral. it is somewhat similar to a mixture of s/z and h. r: a capital S superimposed on top of a circle. the shorthand for this character connects the circle and the S, so the character is written with one unbroken line, appearing like a mix between the capital letter S and a curly number 3.

the third column is a test column, where i try out the script on the names of some of my characters. from top to bottom, the names used are Aulen, Lyzi, Teoda (phoneticized as Tayoda), Solice/Solise (phoneticized as Solis), Ghost (phoneticized as Gost), Hornet (phoneticized as Honet), Orchid (phoneticized as Okid), Glimmer (phoneticized as Glime(r)), and Lheki (phoneticized as Leki). all names have a small circle to the lower right of the name; Aulen's name, at the top of the column, has a note pointing to it that indicates that the circle is used to denote importance. with the exception of Glimmer and Lheki's names, all names have a cursive counterpart underneath them, which is an interlinked and slightly messier version of the name. Ghost's name has a disjointed, rougher looking version underneath it, using some of the shorthand versions of the symbols. end image description]

oh yeah that was really fun to transcribe, if you were wondering /hj good god thats the longest id ive ever written and i hope it makes sense

adventures in conlang-ing?? i Guess?? because thats something i do now???? i actually need to add the r back into the hallownestian alphabet because i realized a few somewhat cursed things would happen if i Didnt have the r phoneme, but im not going to get into that. as it stands now its pretty comprehensive, and its pretty. bite me. askjdfghkjs

i always knew that whatever script i would use for hallownest would be very curly and circle based, because thats how i think hallownest works? also i know hallowscript exists, and i respect the hallowscript team immensely, but that alphabet is Not practical for writing purposes, for several reasons. and it wasnt round enough, so i made my own.

i also knew from the start that i wanted hallownestian to be more phonetics based? so thats whats going on with column one with the vowel sounds. because english! is bullshit! dont know if youve noticed! /s i actually looked up english phonemes and the most commonly used sound and shit so hopefully its at least somewhat realistic. again, i dont have a background in linguistics and i have no idea what im doing, but i am really good at spending way too much time and effort doing shit like this, so theres probably some basis.

so with the exception of the r character, whatever thats going to look like (and when i get that done ill probably update this post), here. hallownestian script, mostly au specific, but general use works too. fucking tada.

i keep making more work for myself.

edit: r has been added. whee

[boydepartment]

hii i’m here to make a request (omg i definitely didn’t tell u i was doing this)

could you write something about boyfriend hyunnie just comforting the reader when they can’t sleep, just lots of fluff and sleepy hyun maybe idk HAHA 🫶🏻🫶🏻 thank u ily <33

authors note: heheheheh ily soooooo much I got this

Kiss Me- Sixpence None The Richer

wc: 500

warnings: none

You found yourself once again tossing and turning, it started to become a normal occurrence lately with Hyunjin always getting back late from work. It wasn’t his fault and you’d never blame him, let alone tell your boyfriend about your sleeping problems coming up again. He’s known a little bit about it in the past but you’ve never made it a big deal.

Hyunjin was always very doting; you’re his world, so you telling him would make him feel bad. That would make you feel worst and-

Ugh… You flipped again and this position was somehow even worse than the last 50 positions you sprawled yourself out in. Taking a deep breath you looked at the time, squinting in the moonlit room at the old fashioned alarm clock. The little hands telling you it was 12:32, obviously am.

You sat up and took in your surroundings, your eyes were well adjusted to the dark by now due to trying to fall asleep for the past hour and a half. Taking a deep breath you stood up and walked to the living room. Flipping on the lights you screamed seeing a tall figure just standing there.

“BABY IT’S ME IT’S ME!” Your boyfriend practically hunched over and walked quickly towards you. He felt awful for coming home late again AND scaring the love of his life. Hyunjin wrapped his arms around you and slightly moved both of you back and forth.

“Oh! I DIDNT know you were home!” You spoke now melting into his touch. Your heart rate calming down at the sight of him. He wasn’t touchy with a lot of other people, but with you. Sometimes you’d have to pry him off.

“Chan let us out early.” He mumbled and nuzzled his head in your shoulder, “did I wake you?”

You shook your head no, “I’ve been up… I couldn’t sleep, I’m sorry.”

Hyunjin looked up from your shoulder, “baby why’re you apologizing? There’s nothing to apologize for.” He kissed around your face, trying to make you feel better.

You shrugged and looked away from him, you felt guilty for not telling him how much you haven’t been able to sleep. Hyunjin’s hand went to yours and he softly squeezed.

“Are your sleeping problems coming up again?”

You looked up at him somewhat in shock, “what do you mean?”

Hyunjin’s eyes softened, “when we first started dating and you mentioned your sleeping issues briefly, I took note of that. I also researched and maybe I asked your mom.”

Your eyes went from shock to pure adoration, “you asked my mom about it?”

“Well duh obviously if you have a problem I’m gonna ask about it.” He huffed and looked away, seemingly embarrassed. You let out a small laugh and put your hands on his face.

“You’re so sweet.”

He looked at you, melting instantly. You two always had that effect on eachother.

Any embarrassment he had went away. The only thing in Hyunjin’s eyes was love and care for you.

“I got you a couple things actually.” Hyunjin walked to his bag and pulled out a new blanket and a new book to read, “I wanted to make up for some of the late nights recently. Well and now scaring you really bad when I came home.”

You smiled and practically jumped in his arms, “thank you, this means a lot to me… you’re the best…”

Hyunjin let out a giggle and held you even with the stuff in his hands, “I know. Best boyfriend of the universe award goes to me!”

You pulled away and gave him a look which made him giggle even more.

“Let me shower and get ready for bed and I’ll join you.” He said softly, giving you a kiss on the head, and walking to the bathroom.

You made your way back to the bed and got under the covers with your new blanket, of course. Soon enough you heard the hairdryer stop and your boyfriend was skipping to the bed to join you.

Hyunjin was definitely SKIPPING too, you could hear it in his footsteps and it made you giggle slightly. He curled up next to you and put his hand on your waist.

“Flip over I want to talk.” He whined, you did so and looked at him.

Hyunjin was truly one of a kind. His eyes looked so pretty whenever he looked at you.

“Hi.” You smiled up at him, the bed wasn’t uncomfortable anymore with your other half laying in it with you.

“Hi.” He kept staring at you.

You helped pull the covers over him better.

Hyunjin smiled at you, “when you have trouble sleeping I read online that reading an actual paper book helps. And I bought teas a couple weeks ago that could help too.”

“You really did your research huh?” You yawned and stretched as much as you could with him engulfing you.

“Of course I did my research. I love you and want you to be healthy.” Hyunjin let out a yawn after you.

“I love you too… Can you tell me about your day?” You asked, laying your head on him more.

Hyunjin nodded, “yeah I can… so…”

As Hyunjin went on about his day, you felt your eyes become heavy. Although when he mentioned Jisung totally eating shit while walking down the hall, you couldn’t help but let out a small laugh. As he talked his thumb would softly rub your eyebrow, the comforting action made you even more sleepy. You felt yourself feeling as light as a feather as you drifted off to dreamland.

“Goodnight my darling.”

[simpliao]

hola mi amigo, you wanna ask, I'll give you a lovey dovey ask, what happens when reader, later on in their marriage, found out she expecting and jschlatt and her try telling her in-laws, and they manage to, but at the expense of her getting hassled with snide comments. Maybe it can be an angst to fluff, idk, I like that drama

😩💅🍺

no one else matters ; (irl) schlatt x reader

– part one , – part two , – part three , – part four , – part five , – part six

summary : y/n is eating for two ! although she’s early on, schlatt is excited to tell his family of their to-be newest member… but they just can’t seem to bite their tongues.

info : rude family members, body shaming, heavy swearing, angst to fluff, cute nicknames, pregnant afab she/her reader.

a/n : i hope to god no one goes through my search history because someone is going to think i'm pregnant, it took so much research and ahhhh... hope you enjoy anon !

"They'll be over the moon about it so don't worry, but if anything happens come find me, alright? Stress can hurt the baby, but more importantly it can hurt you."

It was what her husband had been reiterating over and over since they had first agreed to come by for Christmas holidays, hosted of course by his family. By time the time to travel had arrived, she was just past her first trimester and visibly pregnant. Knowing his family and with the handful of times they had interacted, it wasn't always pretty, but knowing of how pushy they were about pregnancy beforehand she only wished for a civil two weeks.

The flight over had gone without a hitch, minus the glares Schlatt wouldn't be afraid to give anyone that he found mildly sketchy or got too close to them in general. Since having found out about the third member that would be forming their family, to say he's become overprotective would be a bit of an understatement. He attended every appointment with her doctor, and executed every order with conviction. You needed prenatal vitamins? He would stop streaming, or whatever he was doing, just to make sure you took them every day, no exceptions. There was a worry about not getting enough fruit or vegetables in your diet? He would sit there and (jokingly) make plane noises to try and feed you, which depending on the day can either make you bawl or laugh hysterically (no in-between).

Many late nights he was awoken to her soft whimpering, and a plea for whatever weird craving that seemed to have disrupted your sleep. He didn't mind getting it, no matter the hour, so long as she didn't try and get things on her own. No leaving the house alone, he know he wouldn't be able to live with himself should he lose both his beloved and his child. It was kept under drapes that she was pregnant for a handful of reasons, if in the situation that she falls victim to a miscarriage, having to explain that to other people would only dishearten the both of them. He was especially adamant about not telling anyone for the fact that if it got out, he didn't want his audience in particular to make their shitty comments and stress her out. Especially when she was more emotionally fragile, and that stress could lead to losing the baby.

But now, standing outside of his old family home, he gave her a reassuring smile and a gentle reminder. "We got this, you got this. I'm sure they'll be happy and all over you, so if you get overwhelmed you always have me." And with the ringing of the doorbell a scurry of different things could be heard from behind, until the door opened to reveal his parents. Smiles were exchanged, it was a bit of a blur to the smaller woman who kind of followed her husband around like a baby duck, the excess in hormones in her body did make her mind slightly fuzzier so it was hard to keep up with multiple different stimuli. And under a heavy winter coat no one even noticed the bulge of her stomach... Except they did.

"Y/n!" Her name was called, turning around she was met with a group of her female in-laws; and with sheepish smile she waved them hello. Before she could even utter out a greeting they had already spoken, "did you gain weight?" The impulsive question making heat rush to her cheeks, again, she opened her mouth to say something. "Ah, no, well actually I'm–..." "You know keeping in shape is an important duty of a wife, if you get too ugly it won't surprise me if you guys get divorced." They held the brightest smiles as if they were giving the most wholesome of advice, but a feeling of dread washed over her as she fought back the urge to cry.

She internally cursed knowing she was way more sensitive than she should be, and quickly looked behind her for reassurance. But Schlatt wasn't there, and with the crowd of relatives that she couldn't exactly recognize it only served to overwhelm her. Their words pierced her heart despite knowing how poorly his family was at wording what they meant; too ugly? So she was already uglier then they knew her to be, what if her pregnant body wasn't as attractive as Schlatt claimed it to be? What if he really hated how she looked? Was she really that unattractive? "You think so..?" She uttered out, "I mean I... He still thinks that I'm pretty even if–" "men lie all the time sweetheart, if you really want to keep him you should consider losing a few. Bloated doesn't look good on you." She sucked in her lower lip and suppressed her urge to bawl, they were probably right, and quietly nodded her head. She knew she'd been eating a lot, he must have thought of her as such a pig.

Yet across the room her husband was completely gushing about his gorgeous, pregnant wife; having already told his mother while his dad had taken their heavy bags to set aside. He was ready to show everyone the ultrasound picture of to-be newest member of the Schlatt family, it was evident from the smile and shine in his eyes that he thought nothing less of the woman he married. He was completely absorbed into conversation that he hadn't noticed the lack of her at his side, and when he leaned into ask for the photograph of their little bundle of joy; he was surprised to not find her where he was sure she stood.

Excusing himself, and being taller than majority of people it wasn't hard to spot her towards the entrance speaking with a group of his female relatives; he approached will a smile and expected her to have already told them. Out of everyone they should have been the happiest, he remembered damn correctly that they were the ones that were pressuring her into having a child just a handful of years back.

"...if you really want to keep him you should consider losing a few. Bloated doesn't look good on you." What? He had heard one of them, just a short distance away his wife turned away from him held her arms and was dreadfully silent. "What the fuck did you just say?" His voice practically boomed above the ambient jumbled up sound of other conversations being held; the group themselves turning to him as well as a few close bystanders. His pretty girl looked at him with surprise and the most crestfallen look, she was on the verge of spilling into a puddle of tears, and he rushed to her side to make sure she wouldn't fall if that was the case.

"Oh! Yeah, just woman talk, you know? She got pudgy and we figured that we'd give our advice and–" "She doesn't need your advice. You've fucked with her head once, I'm not letting you do it again." "Oh, come on Jay, you're really telling me you want a fat, ugly wife?" His focus was upon his almost bawling wife until those last three words left the brunettes mouth; the group glowing with confidence until he turned his head to look at them. They all shrunk under his furious glare, arms wrapped around his smaller lover protectively, words spat with venom and repugnance. "Shut your fucking mouth bitch. Y/n will always be more of a beautiful woman than any of you will ever be. You were the fuckers that wanted her to have a child so bad, and the minute she's pregnant you say shit like that? Do you want us to lose the baby that bad?" Realization flashes their faces at the word pregnant, other members of the family had all taken to notice and begun to stare; their eyes feeling like harsh burns to the smaller woman even if she was shielded by most.

Schlatt had learned to feel her anxiety over time, and his face visibly softened when he felt her arms grip tighter onto his knitted sweater. He let out a soft huff, "we're leaving. You can tell Mom exactly what happened, I can't have Y/n stress out anymore." The room fell silent after everyone had watched the exchange, abashed and shameful looks upon those women's faces as he escorted his lover out. He quickly grabbed his coat and opened the door for his wife, slamming it behind him as the moment the pair were outside a breath of relief escaped him; the atmosphere in there he knew to be suffocating

"Sweetheart..." He began softly, he looked before him where his lover stood with her hands attempting to rub away tears. They had barely been in there for fifteen minutes. "Do you think I'm..." A soft hiccup briefly interrupted her, "...pretty?" A frown fell upon his features, as he rushed in to gently hold her, he didn't want to ask everything that they said as to not have her revisit it; but he knew it couldn't have been any good. He hushed her tears endearingly, letting her begin to cry into the corduroy of his jacket. "Y/n... Do you remember my wedding vows?" He could feel her shake her head no into the material of his jacket. "...I will forever love your smile, your laugh, your body, and you, no matter how imperfect you believe you are. Those were my exact words, I remember them because I mean them. You'll always be so enchanting in my eyes, because you're not just a beautiful face. You're my wonderful wife, you're a damn funny woman, you care about me more than anyone else on this shitty planet, and you'll make for an incredible mother to our child."

He held her close to protect her from the cold, he could feel her gentle smile against his chest, a gentle snow beginning to fall around them. "We don't have to be here, we still have some of our stuff in the car. I'll get us a nice hotel for the night and we can order in whatever you're feeling. How does that sound?" She pulled her head away and seeing that redness around her eyes strained at his heart, he never liked to see his darling cry. "But... But what about your–..." "They can shove their feelings or remarks right back up their ass. No one else matters but my wife and our child, and seeing you so distraught isn't good for all three of us. As much as I know my cousins mean well what they said was fucked, if I see the, again tonight I'm going to end up in a fight. I'm sure their husbands won't be happy with their wives loosing a couple teeth, huh toots?" She let out an almost inaudible chuckle, despite it all and despite how her emotions have been in full swing, nothing made her more centred or relaxed than her husband. He had her glued to his side as they made it to the car, opening the passenger side of the rented out Tesla and kissing her forehead before letting her inside.

He did live up to his promise by finding a luxury hotel closer to the city that offered twenty-four hour room service, and he made sure to share a piece of cake with his lover. Assuring her to eat what she wanted, and that he'd love her no matter what.

[whatudottu]

Hello! Just here to say that I love all of yours and anon's DID Blitzwing related thoughts!! I adore Blitzwing and they're (he?) what got me researching DID again after so long (my little autistic brain loves them <33). I'm not a system (or if I am, everyone else is really well hidden!!), but I love learning about all the things minds are capable of doing to protect themselves and I think it's fascinating - though I know that obviously I'll have some misconceptions so I'm always very happy to learn more :)

Do you have any other ideas/ headcannons about them? I would love to hear them /gen

Oh I'm not infallible either, not a system myself but I am fascinated with psychology (looks at my therapist Ben 10 character). Besides Blitzwing is an interesting character to have DID because they're not human and so with our human (and audience) perception, it can be easy to connect Blitz to DID even if that's not what the TFA writers intended- the added bonus is my intrigue in xenobiology/psychology so... Blitz's the perfect sample for that asjdhgblsjfkl-!

As for headcanons, those may need to be under the cut they got a bit much haha-!

You can take some of these headcanons as little hints towards a canon!Blitzwing, but because I've been rambling with the anons about Bot Experiment Triple-Changers these are kinda more focused on that little au rather than the original-

I like to imagine Random would totally eat organic (non-metal) food if given the chance/no one else fronts to stop him. With the power of fire and ice, he at least has assurances for the others that Random can and will ingest flaming fuel and liquid nitrogen just to get rid of any residue of authentic Italian cuisine. It seems to really be his thing idk- Probably doesn't help that Octane would totally be on his side if she ever fronted (certainly eggs him on when they're both in the headspace).

There's a pretty common headcanon that Blitzwing sculpts, but I like to pin the sculpting hobby onto Hothead because metal sculpting would work far easier with a little heat. As a bonus BETC!Blitz exclusive I like to say that Private actually had a passion for carving, his little area of the headspace decorated with what he remembers making, so Hothead took a little bit of a peak at that and got interested in it's complement; building something from nothing as opposed from revealing something from another something.

And Icy I feel is just really intrigued by alien cultures (that little commentary on how fascinating human cities are like nano-bots WILL NOT ESCAPE ME), perhaps a little more so than being interesting in Cybertron itself. I mean he's not gonna say that OUT LOUD with Decepticons around, but he finds the different ways different planets and different countries ON those planets create homes and lifestyles unique to their own individual circumstance. Astrotrain would feel a kinship to that, considering the bot had previously worked in cargo transport across Cybertron and getting to experience the different cultures of it's citystates, but Astrotrain also understands VERY WELL why Icy might not have the best connection to 'home'.

I also think that, out of the hosts, Hothead is the most affectionate towards Private and despite not having any wings in their headspace, Hothead speaks to Private like an older warframe does to a young(er) war bot. Random when not fronting fucks around with Octane if Astrotrain's covering Private's six, the two of them being chaotic little gremlins that spells disaster for any bot unlucky enough to be around the next time Random fronts with a prank idea. And to round this off if Octane is being the wine aunt to Private (or about as responsibly irresponsible like one), Astrotrain and Icy take a moment to sit and breathe, talking about traveling and other more silent contemplations.

And I think that might be all from the top of my head? Only saw this ask about nearly 12 hours after the timestamp says I got it so hopefully you weren't waiting to long asjdhfgaslkfkl-! But nah, I love Blitzwing, just needed to sit on my thoughts haha-

[bunny-n-bee]

Hey hey! I loved the cold fanfic! Idk if yall are taking requests atm but if you are id love one with the obey me brothers comforting you when you have a migraine. If you arent taking requests tho just ignore me haha. I hope your day is lovely!

[The OB boys comforting you when you have a migraine]

—> ACK! sorry this took so long, i am a slow writer, (also didn’t know who u wanted to write this, i assumed me since cold is my fanfic -🐇✨) tho be warned this is being written by someone who, although gets frequent migraines, tends to completely ignore them till they become unbearable. i also just have a high pain tolerance, also did y’all know there’s warning signs 1-2 days before you get a migraine, that’s crazy, i be ignore my body fr fr

{Demon Brothers x GN! reader}

((you can find my general headcannons here))

[ Lucifer ]

he gets migraines too, and he also tends to ignore them till they get so bad he has to take a break from working and deal with it,

however when it comes to you, he will not be having it, the minute he can feel your migraine he is coming for you, for he already knows it’s bad if he can feel the pressure, though only slightly

he’d definitely want to scold you, on how you should be taking better care of yourself and listen to your body more, but now is not the time,

when he finds you, you’re in the middle of his younger brothers fighting, literally, you’re sandwich in between Mammon and Levi yelling at each other, and while you look fine, he can tell your five minutes away from physically beating the both of them or breaking down into tears, not that he can blame you

instead of yelling at mammon and levi to leave you alone, he simply calls for you, staying how he need to talk to you about something rather urgent

course you run to him, your heads been throbbing for two hours already, and these two knuckleheads were making it so much worse

Lucifer would usher you back to his quiet room, give you demonic pain killers and offer you his bed and/or some water

[ Mammon ]

i love him to bits and pieces but man’s would most definitely be the reason ya have a migraine in the first place

probably wouldn’t catch on even if he felt your migraine, but after you told him he’d immediately flip the switch from being super loud and flashy to quiet

would fumble a bit and ask how to help/ what to do, he’d be a little lost at first, probably doesn’t even understand what migraines are and would do research

loud noises and bright lights make it worse? say no more, he’s stealing noise canceling headphones from levi for you and making his room as dim as possible

would run his hands through your scalp if you let him, and would gently massage your head too

try’s his absolute hardest to be a quiet as possible for your duration of your migraine

would lay with you till it’s completely passed and would ask how to prevent migraines from happening in the first place

unfortunately for him, sometimes they just happened for no reason, it frustrates him knowing he can’t prevent them

but he’ll be there for you regardless and do whatever you need him to do, he’s very dependable like that :)

[ Leviathan ]

another one who wouldn’t know you’re suffering unless you say something,

Levi doesn’t get migraines but he does get over stimulated, so he’d somewhat have an idea on how to help you with the horrible symptoms that sometimes come with migraines

need a quiet place to be? his room is perfect for it, he has enough noise canceling headphones for you to choose from, ranging from super canceling to muffled

would also offer a cold rag to put over your eyes and forehead, he swears it helps him with his eyes when he stares too much at his screen

would sit next to you and if he’s feeling brave or if the pain is a bit unbearable he’ll pull you into his lap and hold you while he games or watches anime

Levi would feel kinda helpless, i mean there’s only so much you can do for another person’s physical pain

would do “research” on how to better help humans, and by that he’d watched animes that he thinks would help him understand better

[ Satan ]

Satan also gets migraines, maybe not as bad Lucifer, but he’s still in-tuned with his body, as well as yours

as soon as he feels your migraine he’s coming for you, you can protest all you want saying how it’s not even that bad yet, he doesn’t care

you’re getting water, pain killers and a snack if you haven’t eaten, and you’re getting anything else this man deems appropriate

he’s read up on human migraines and learns how to be able to tell when one might be around the corner, so now he jumps at any opportunity to care for you

some of his remedies might be a bit strange but bear with him, he wants to make sure he tries everything to help you

speaking of which, cats, did you know cats have healing properties??? well they do

now Satan has at least two cats on you to “help” heal your migraine

why are you laughing, he’s serious cats purrs can heal people, now shush and lay down

if your migraine isn’t too bad, Satan will read softly to you

[ Asmodeus ]

poor Asmo has NO idea what’s going on or how to help you

ofc this man doesn’t get migraines, he try’s not to stress over anything and is very well hydrated and eats when needed

honestly he’d feel bad and rush to the only other human he knows for help

“SOLOMON MY BABY IS DYING WHAT DO I DO?!”

Solomon explains what migraines are and how to help (even offering to cook for you, Asmo quickly denies this offer as he wants to help you get better not worse)

Asmo absorbs all the information that is given to him and is prepared to take the best care of you

like mammon, at first Asmo is not very good at it, he’s still kinda loud and will chitchat, but soon enough he learns to talk softer

he’d hold you and gently run his hands through your hair, or if you don’t want to be held, he lays you down in his bed

his pillows are so fluffy and seems to ease the throbbing of your head

he’d kiss your forehead so tenderly and buy you one of those frozen masks that go over your eyes

overall would do everything in his power to make sure his love is okay

[ Beelzebub ]

another clueless boy :(

when he feels your migraines he thinks you hit your head and asks if you’re okay or if you have a bruise

you tell him you’re fine but he’s not buying it, he’s checking your head to make sure there’s no bruise

you explain to him that you just have a migraine that’s all

Beel takes it upon himself to do some research about migraines, oh no not eating can cause migraines?! now he’s panicking 100 times more, are you not eating enough!??

Beel starts carrying snacks, water and specific pain killers intended for human migraines that he got from Solomon

if his brothers are making it worse he’ll carry you to his room, where he can feed you and keep you company

unless you ask Beel to cuddle you, he’d rather hold your hand just in case cuddling is too much for you, he wouldn’t want to add to your physical pain

worries about you a lot and looks out for you constantly

Beel wishes he can make the migraines go away permanently so you’d never be in pain again

[ Belphegor ]

he’s not clueless when it comes to migraines, Belphine’s had the unfortunate pleasure of having a couple due to not eating properly and being dehydrated

he doesn’t care if he can only feel a fraction of your migraine, he hates the slight headache feeling

even if he’s in the deepest sleep he’s gonna wake up and go look for you

the most comfort you’re getting out of Belphine is him holding you and running his hands throw your hair, sometimes he’ll even let you lay your head in his lap

mainly he nags you to take care of yourself, though if he clearly sees you’re not he’s gonna try to help you

Belphine makes you drink some water, eat a lil something and gives you some potion for the pain (he made it human safe so don’t worry)

however Belphine also knows that sometimes it’s best to simply sleep off the migraine

so if all else fails he’ll drag you up to the attic, make a big fluffy nest of pillows and blankets and tries to get you to fall asleep naturally

if you’re having a particularly bad migraine he’ll uses his powers to put you to sleep

~

would y’all wanna see the same concept with the undatbles??

-🐇✨

<masterlist>

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