#this took me an hour and a half im so fucking proud

[thiirsdaygirl]

hi tumblr i have a sketch for u

[littlehatmouse]

wip of guy from get out im working on in my art class (i have never seen get out)

reference

it looks really desaturated in the picture but the colors irl are better lmao

[naokyunnn]

“No guy ever made me cum yet…only myself”

pussy slapping, implied experienced fem!reader. mult. anime characters.

This guy will be delighted, he feels like he’s born to do this with that big smirk on his face.

What do you mean no one made you cum yet? EVER? Those guys must be so bad who uses you to just get off for themselves.

“Hmm? Let’s change that—“ He says through his smirk while he grabbed the back of your knees and spread your legs open, your drenched cunt on full view just for him— aching and clenching at nothing so badly for some release. “Hah— fuck, im going to do you justice baby…” He whispered to your cunt as if he’s talking to it.

He then attached his lips around hood of your clit while his flattened his tongue and lick up the slit. Both of you moaned in unison at the feeling. He then started flicking his tongue over your clit and sucking on it softly, enough to send you to the heavens.

He continued eating you out messily, both arms hooked over your legs, trapping you in that spot as he buried his face deeper against your pussy. Chants of his name slip out of your mouth as you grip on his locks.

He’s been going at it for an HOUR you felt bad because you still don’t feel that feeling, it’s good but you’re not reaching your high yet. You decided to just… well…. lie.

“Mnngh…. cumming— ahh” You moaned while your mouth hangs open, forcing yourself to reach your release soon, but it just can’t.

He stops, and detached himself from your pussy, he look at you with full of mischief in his eyes. “Were you really?” He smirks.

You gulped nervously. Your silence is enough answer for him. His thumb went over to rub your clit slowly. “Don’t lie to me baby… im doing this f’you y’know?” He gave you a half hearted smile but it soon turns into a wicked smirk, “… I won’t stop until you cum and gushing mess, are we clear?” He cooes, his thumb rubbed faster on your clit as you mouth hangs open again in pleasure. “S-sorry…. please… make me cum” You pleaded through your moans.

He chuckled lowly, almost mockingly. He took away his thumb away from your clit and slapped your wet cunt. “Bad girl” He mocked with a smirk. You moaned at the sudden slap on your cunt, babbling sorry’s. He dived back in again, this time he’s more hungry eating that pussy!

He did stood with his promise not to stop until you cum gushing, because before you know it, you lost track of time already and all you know is you came HARD.

“Ahh… there she is… hmm.. that’s how it should be, pretty” He smiled proudly ad he watch your chest rise and fall as you chase your breath, your kegs twitching and the sheets underneath you is SOAKED. Oh boy… he’s proud that he just wanna pound you hard and make you cum hard again and again just to see you break all over again.

DAZAI OSAMU, GOJO SATORU, MICHAEL KAISER, SHIDOU RYUSEI, Geto Suguru, Itoshi Sae, Ego. Nikolai Gogol, Fyodor Dostoyevsky, Chuuya Nakahara, Karasu Tabito, Ran Haitani, Rindou Haitani, SANZU. … Your faves!

WROTE THIS IN CLASS HAHENSHSHAJS

[issuesntissues]

when 141 accidentally breaks/ruins something of yours 😬

Price

you'd just finished a drawing you spent hours on, and ran to show price! (he was very proud, gave you one of his rare smiles)

you said you'd go to the restroom for a moment, and left the paper on his desk

as he picked it up to admire it once more, he knocked over his coffee mug, and cursed as the brown liquid spread all over the page

immediately as he grasped it the soggy page tore, and the ink blurred together into a black mess

when you came back he looked downright embarrassed, his face and ear tips red

"spilled my damn coffee all over it...sorry love..."

you tell him its no big deal, but he can see the tears welling in your eyes

his pursed lips and downcast expression made your heart ache, and you gave him a genuine arm pat, pulling yourself together

he promised the next drawing you made would be framed in his office for him to look at everyday 🫶

Ghost

You’d shown him the brand new sun glasses you ordered, and he definitely approved

you were curious about how they’d look on him so you handed him the pair

he took them, squinting as he turned them around in his hands, then attempted to put them over his mask

with a loud snap! the frames fell apart, pieces clinking on the floor below

“oh, fuck me…sorry darling…” he sounded slightly embarrassed as he handed the broken glasses back to you

you brushed it off as an accident, but you were disappointed you didn’t get to wear them for very long

ghost meanwhile felt horrible, and it nagged in the back of his brain for the whole day

he gives you one of his own pairs later, and you took them happily, promising to take good care of them 🫶

he thinks you look hot asf with them on too

Soap

you just finished unwrapping a new favorite mug for your collection, and set it on a table for display

while you went off to do something in another room, soap decides to handle your new item, tracing the intricate engravings in the ceramic

as you returned, he spoke, "aye this is nice...where'd you get—" he didn't get to finish as while he tried swapping the mug to his other hand, he fumbled it, and it went shattering all over the flooring below

your face immediately scrunched up in despair and soap grimaced

"hells fuckin' bells bonnie, im sorry." he cursed, his accent thicker from his embarrassment

he kneeled to start picking up the pieces, and you noticed little shards cutting into his skin but he didn't complain, and so you helped him

afterwards you clean and bandage up his hand, and after more apologies, he promised he'd get you a new mug 🫶

Gaz

gaz isnt prone to breaking a lot of things; he's very careful & self aware. but alas, he isn't perfect

you'd just finished a puzzle in the break room and you were super excited to show the task force

Gaz was the most impressed and excited, and then—

"hey! have you ever tried picking it up in one piece?" oh no—

as soon as he attempted, the puzzle fell apart immediately, the pieces clattering all over the floor

you bit your lip and attempted not to cry, but your body betrayed you, and the fat tears rolled down your cheeks

after being scolded by the team for a good half an hour, he spent days putting that puzzle back together just for you,,

swore he'd never ever make you cry again

he framed the puzzle afterwards ❤️

[pigcowboys]

hcs for percy x child of athena!reader that’s like, badass and super good at fighting/using knives/swords/other weaponry/ in a fight but is like super emotionally closed off?

-bitey anon (if that’s not taken)

pairing: percy jackson x artemis!reader

summary: headcanons for percy with a reader who's a child of artemis.

warning(s): slight mentions of blood, cursing, weapons (even if that even counts lol!), established relationship and sickeningly sweet fluff.

a/n: OMG HELLO BITEY ANON!! its not taken yet!! this is such a cool request i hope you enjoy what i did, sorry it took a moment!! and im so so sorry to anyone who's sent in a request!! i swear i'm trying to finish them all :( life is just..lifeing rn.

requests are currently closed!

okay so first of all i HAVE to talk about the beef percy and artemis must have.

like yo who is this guy? and why is he interested in her child? her only child too.

she's like that one person who's secretly praying on your downfall and really doesn't care if you two know it.

she most likely warmed up to the idea of you two dating over time because, to be honest - she likes percy.

would never say it to his face though, he has a big enough head.

BUT ON TO THE DATING!

hmm percy with a more closed off s/o is kind of hard to imagine.

hes so expressive and open i feel like he'd try his hardest to get his s/o to open up.

would NEVER push you to do anything though - he'd never wanna make you feel uncomfortable, after all.

"good morning my beautiful demi-god, how'd you sleep?" "like a rock., those bed are so fucking hard" "i may have a solution to your problem.."

"percy you've been caught like 6 times trying to sneak into my cabin.." "7th times a charm."

bro he probably fell in love with you the first time he saw you fighting.

you two were probably on some random quest and you had gotten ambushed by a couple of monsters.

he wanted to the boyfriend-y thing and help fend off the monsters so he could impress you.

he was doing great for little till you joined in and started helping him fight as well.

literally could NOT keep his eyes off you, you were so cool!!

he was going to make some really cool and suave quip while you were fighting to see a smile or something when he was hit in the face by a particularly angry monster.

attack sent him flying back a bit - totally made him scuff his shoes.

was happy you were able to finish off the monster that hit him but was slightly embarrassed that he got hit.

though, he did enjoy you feeding him some nectar per his own request.

i think he'd be like obsessed with the way you fight.

i mean, how couldn't he? you look so cool when you're doing all that swinging and slicing..he's so proud of you.

may or may not have been victim of a slice to his cheek from getting to close to you while you were training but seriously doesn't count it as you being reckless - he needed to be more careful.

"holy shit — are you okay?" "uhh..probably..? why is there something on my face?" "i think i..nipped you." "nipped me?" "you're..bleeding." "oh."

percy's a great guy but i feel like he'd also worry like 10x more about you because of you being slightly closed off.

checks in with you like every few minutes even if you've already told him you're okay.

you'd be woken up at like 12 pm from his texts alone.

always calling to make sure you're okay while he's away from camp half-blood on a quest or just hanging out somewhere on his college campus.

you do love that he's so caring!

you just..hate getting that stupid notification sound every few hours.

he'd be crushed if you ever told him that though so, you just deal with it.

honestly i don't think he'd care too much if you were closed off - it's all the same to him!

your aversion to speaking up while not stop him from going out of his way to surprise you with different gifts or with random hugs.

may or may not sniff your clothes slightly when he does hug you.

don't tell him you notice it, he'd die.

"what's that?" "a plushie, for you." "..why?" "didn't you say this was your favorite animal?" "oh..perce.. "

though, i feel like the only time you being closed off would be a problem would be when you two have an argument.

he's very open to hearing your side but hates when you don't let him know you have a problem

how else is he supposed to find a way to help?

overall though, you two would get along just great!!!

invites you out with him after you're done training whenever he can just so he can spend time with you.

doesn't even matter where you two are going.

yeah no, he thinks you're so awesome.

[souperbloom]

the way things go. [A.I.]

title from the song the way things go by beebadoobee

ex boyfriend!ash

part 1 of 2 | random little post breakup angst.

a/n: i’ve never written anything like this so i thought i’d give it a try— let me know what you think :) there will be a part 2 but im still unsure of what direction to take this in so if you have any suggestions feel free to drop them in my inbox!

no major cws, just a brief mention of drinking & vibes. ☻

WORDCOUNT: 3.5k

⋆⭒˚｡⋆

You around?

Sent. 2:58am

An odd buzzing from beneath your pillow stirred you awake from the deepest sleep you’ve had in weeks. Your phone buzzed once and just like that, you were awake? Couldn’t be. It had to have been some sort of sixth sense.

Call me. I miss you.

Sent. 2:59am

The silk pillowcase cradled your cheek as the buzzing continued. Bzzt. Bzzt. Bzzt.

Baby, please.

Sent. 2:59am

I miss you.

Sent. 2:59am

So much.

Sent. 3:00am

It wasn’t long before the incessant buzzing frustrated you to the point of reaching beneath your pillow and yanking your phone out from under it. The harsh light made your eyes water and burn, but the notifications on the screen made them ache even more.

ASHTON: 5 New Messages.

You’ve gotta be fucking kidding.

What was once a fluttering feeling in your chest, seeing his name sprawled across the screen, turned abruptly into agony. You didn’t think it would be so soon— him reaching out to you. It had been a month, almost to the day, since you and Ashton had called your three and a half year relationship quits. Things were serious enough to bring marriage into the question and suddenly, one random Tuesday night, it all came crashing down. He told you that it wasn’t you, that it was him, that it was the right person at the wrong time and all of the other painfully worn out cliches. To think that you even considered marrying him at all.

A crazy thought at three in the morning.

And even crazier when you thought about him texting you in the middle of the night. After a month of no contact.

have you been drinking?

Sent. 3:01 am

Your thumbs twiddle quickly and hit send, waiting for those three little deathly bubbles to pop up and confirm that no, you weren’t dreaming and yes, he was anxiously awaiting your reply.

ASHTON

Maybe. Maybe not.

Sent. 3:01am

His response makes you grumble; Ashton was absolutely insufferable— and even more so when inebriated. You didn’t want to deal with him right now, it was in your best interest to just ignore him and fight the thought of him right back to sleep.

But something inside of you wasn’t allowing this to be that easy.

go to bed.

Sent. 3:02am

ASHTON

Not until you’re in it.

Sent. 3:02am

that made no sense.

Sent. 3:02am

Why was it so difficult to put your phone down?

ASHTON

I don’t give a shit. I miss you.

Sent. 3:03am

You were far too tired to be entertaining his stupid desires at such an odd hour of the evening. The time was one thing, but the fact that he was drinking was an entirely new fish to fry. You knew that your actions had consequences, and those consequences were something you’d have to deal with in the morning.

stop texting me.

Sent. 3:04am

Maybe he’ll get the hint.

ASHTON

Come over?

Sent. 3:04am

Okay. Maybe not.

Your bottom lip had gone raw from the amount of biting you’d been doing to it recently, and it had yet to stop at all. It was a nervous habit you’d picked up after the breakup and you thought you were doing well at combating it by picking at your nail beds and twirling your hair— but now, these little ticks were coming out all at once.

You were a walking ball of nerves and haven’t been the same since that random Tuesday, almost a month ago.

no.

Sent. 3:05am

Look at you. Standing your ground. You were so proud of yourself.

ASHTON

Please?

Sent. 3:05am

fine.

Sent. 3:08am

Fuck.

The time it took for you to get yourself decent must’ve been some sort of world record. Because now, seemingly seconds later, you were in your car and hunched over your steering wheel. Taking deep breaths in as the cool leather pricked your balled up fists.

This fucking sucks.

You turned the key and the engine begrudgingly grumbled to a start. Even your car knew that this was a poor decision; sounding like it was about a five mile drive from completely giving up on you.

Lucky for you, Ashton’s house was only a mile away.

The dark winding road leading to Ashton’s driveway felt like an eternity. You were frigid at the thought of him sitting and waiting up for you, sitting on that deep mahogany leather couch with his head tossed back onto the cushions. His knee bobbing impatiently and the light of the TV making his face glow pale. A glass of whiskey, or whatever the fuck poison he picked nowadays, clutched in his hand and taking small sips until ice melted gradually and watered it down.

You hated how much you knew about him. How predictable he had become in your time being with him. You knew that whatever image your brain was conjuring up of him was probably true, down to the outfit he was wearing.

You didn’t bother texting him because you knew that the second his porch lights turned on, he’d be slouched against the doorframe waiting for you. As he always did. Your tires crunched against the gravel as you slowly pulled into his driveway; shaky hands and tired eyes working in tandem to park your car in the usual spot.

“Didn’t think you’d actually show up.”

The familiar voice pulls your gaze away from your slippers and just as expected, there he was.

His hair was a few inches longer, auburn and honeycomb waves colliding into a box-dyed mess. His roots were so much darker, after you had worked so hard on the touch ups and hours spent bent over the bathtub rinsing the bleach out to lighten his black dye job. All of that time was in vain.

There was an appropriate amount of stubble surrounding his cheeks, for the time you’d gone without seeing him. You were too busy admiring his face to notice that he was wearing the Keith Haring printed robe you had gifted him for Christmas.

You probably looked crazy.

“You asked me to come over,” you shrug, trying to make light of the situation.

“So… you came?”

“Why wouldn’t I?”

The tension rising was palpable, despite the tasteful three feet of distance between your bodies, and the only thing you could think about now was the way his mossy eyes sparkled beneath the porch lights.

“Well,” he breaks the silence with a chuckle, “Don’t just stand there. Come inside.”

You don’t say anything else after stepping over the threshold of the house you’d spent almost four years living in. Everything was the same. And you’d imagined it as so. To any normal person, a month wasn’t a terribly long time. But the time after a breakup all seems to mesh into one long day, since stepping into his house for the final time to grab your things felt like it was yesterday.

The guitars still mounted to the wall and decorated art pieces that hung to and fro reminded you of all of the effort you’d spent making this house into a home.

“Is Calum here?” you ask about his best friend and roommate, trying to pay attention to anything else in the room but him.

“Nope. He’s out.”

“Cool.”

Ashton moves around the living room with ease, unperturbed by your presence as he glides over to the connected kitchen. “Want a drink?”

“No. Don’t plan on crashing here, if that’s what you were expecting.”

He lets out a wry chuckle at your attempt to be stern, “I wasn’t expecting anything. Just— trying to be a polite host.”

“Yeah well,” you sigh, flopping back onto that old leather couch, “You don’t have to act like I’m some stranger.”

“Stranger?” he quizzes, opening the door to his fridge as his disembodied voice echoes behind you, “What makes you think I’d treat you like a stranger?”

Your shoulders tense up at his soft words, Ashton rounds the corner back into the livingroom to join you on the couch. He hands you a glass of apple juice, and you take it.

“Thanks,” you murmur, the thought of him keeping a bottle of apple juice in the fridge for you sending a chill down your spine. Despite making fun of you for it, he always remembered that it was your favorite.

“So…” he begins, shifting on the couch to face your slouched body.

You glance over at his posture, and the familiarity of it all was making your head hurt. To think that the way someone chose to sit on a couch was causing you so much grief felt unnatural.

“...How have you been?”

“Fine. Just— living. I suppose that’s all I could really ask for.”

“Living, huh? Sounds fun. Better than dying. If you said you were dying I’d definitely be a little less excited about you showing up here. Walking corpses are not as cool as they are on TV.”

The way Ashton constantly spoke in tongues drove you up the wall. “What the fuck are you even saying?”

“Sorry, I’ve— been watching a lot of TV recently. Also I, uh— had a bit to drink.”

Yeah, no shit.

A few more moments of deafening silence pass and ultimately confuse you. You aren’t sure how silence could be something so loud but alas, whenever you looked at, heard, or even thought of Ashton since that one Tuesday night, the only thing you could hear was the sound of your own quickening heartbeat.

“Do you still have my cashmere sweater?” The thought pops into your mind randomly, as he takes a moment to admire you.

“I do. Did you want it back?”

That question pulls a dry chuckle out of you, “If I didn’t, I probably wouldn’t be asking for it.”

“Fair point. I know just where I left it, too— I’ll go get it.”

Ashton shifts to the edge of the couch to stand up, but stumbles back, due to whatever he had flowing in his system. He braces his ring-clad hands onto the leather and the metal adorning his knuckles tear down into it.

Glancing at those miscellaneous metal etchings and gemstones you’d gifted him makes you think about his infatuation with rings. And, his request for only eight of them.

Your mind flashes back to the anniversaries and milestones where he attempted to collect one for every finger. It could have been preference, or maybe he didn’t foresee enough milestones in which he’d acquire them—but you were never quite sure why he didn’t ask for ten.

He was weird in that way.

“You still wear your rings?” you ask, debating on biting your tongue after letting the question slip right out.

He stops in his tracks, as does your heart, “Of course I do. Why?”

“Dunno’,” you shrug, brushing your shoulder and letting your hand linger on your skin, “Just didn’t think you’d want to after everything.”

Ashton looks at you with intrigue; with purpose. He studies the hand of yours that had been left timidly resting on your forearm.

“Well, to ask you your own question; why wouldn’t I?”

His words hit you like a freight train and suddenly there’s a tightness in your chest that wasn’t there before. You were proud of yourself for being level headed— up until the moment you realized he was right; why wouldn’t he wear those rings?

Why wouldn’t you come over?

“Ashton?” The tightness in your chest was now spreading to your entire body, coating your limbs in this strange paralysis that always seemed to happen when you thought about him.

“Yeah?”

“I miss you, too.”

You don’t even get a moment to process how quickly you were straddling his lap, your crewneck riding up your back as his hands made an effort to explore you. The kiss was heated, sure, but you couldn’t tell if the resentment you felt towards him was meshing into your desires. Those soft little whimpers escaped his chest as you practically pinned him down onto the couch between your knees. You weren’t sure what came over you. Could’ve been his newly acquired taste for classical Hollywood cinema, or the fact that smelling his cologne felt like a breath of fresh air after a month spent locked in a tight little room.

“Ashton,” you mumble his name into his lips and they ricochet back onto yours.

“Oh, Y/N”, he hums, “How I’ve missed you, baby.”

Your tongues danced beneath the glowing of the silver screen, Casablanca being the most appropriate film to be on his television right now.

“I’ve–” your breath staggers, taking a moment to nip at his bottom lip, “I’ve missed you too. God fuckin’–”

The words you were meant to speak were entrapped by soft moans, as Ashton pulls you into his airy pajama pants. He holds you tightly, like he had never left.

“Do– do you–” He attempts to ask the question, the age-old question that had you rethinking your decision to come to his house in the first place.

“I don’t know…”

Your hand travels up to his hair and drags down to cup his cheek, the stubble slightly scratching at your palm and reminding yourself of the blisters that were left in the place of Ashton’s many, many attempts to teach you the drums. Two and a half years of consistent practice paid off.

“That’s okay,” he consoles, nuzzling his cheek into your hand, “We don’t have to do anything. We could just– lay here, y’know? Never minded it, still don’t.”

His answer surprises you. You nod and stutter, unable to form a coherent thought due to the warmth of his bare chest beneath his robe.

“Mmmh. You know what?— I change my mind.”

He chuckles, “Do you, now?”

“Yup. I want to. Gotta’ get whatever the fuck this is— out of my system.”

You couldn’t describe the way Ashton’s face morphed into that of a kicked puppy. The pain in your chest was blatantly obvious now, like a subtle pinprick every time the dim lights would catch the sparkle in his eyes.

“Out of your system?”

“I didn’t— I didn’t mean it like that,” you say; an oxymoron of sorts. Since the elephant in the room started stomping around and now, you were straddling him and tucking a lock of his hair behind his ear.

“I guess I can’t disagree with you. I’ve been missing you a lot but— I don’t know, I can’t really place what I’m feeling.”

Your lip tugs to the side, as does his. Twin looks of confusion in an effort to read each other’s faces. “Let’s just— pick up where we left off? Maybe it’ll help get your mind off the existential dread.”

“Existential dread, huh? Is that what this feeling is?” he asks, his hands running up and down your spine beneath your crewneck.

“Yeah, sure,” you swallow hard, harder than you’d intended and you choke on your words, “We can call it that.”

He whispers your name softly and the chills start running down your body. His voice was the one thing you couldn’t get over; no matter how many nights you’d spent staring at the ceiling in an effort to change that. You’d hear him calling out to you every time the wind blew and hearing him say it right in front of you felt like a slap in the goddamn face.

“Y/N, I’m sorry—”

“It’s a little too late for that now, don’t you think?”

You hated to be so morbid and dry but in the end, it was true. If he had wanted to give apologies where they were due, they should’ve been said the moment he called it quits.

“I figured it’s better late than never. You deserve an apology for— everything that went on.”

Your face turns cherry red, a sudden wash of anger flushing over your cheeks. You push yourself off of his chest with a force that you didn’t even know you were capable of. He jerks back, awe-stricken at the sudden change.

“Oh fuck you Ash. You’re so full of shit,” you mutter, fueled with sudden rage, “If you really wanted to apologize you’d have been at my doorstep a month ago. You don’t care about me. You only care because I’m right in front of you and looking at me hurts too much for you to ignore it.”

“You think I don’t care about you?…”

Ashton’s voice cracks and suddenly you were feeling awful for blowing up unprovoked. The notch in his forehead grows deeper as he studies your infuriated face with sincerity.

“Y/N, of course I fucking care about you. Are you kidding me? I care about you more than anything in this world.”

Another one of those pinpricks tugs at your heartstrings.

“Then why did you let me go?”

Without a moment’s notice or any sort of explanation, Ashton pulls you back into his chest and slots his lips against yours. You don’t fight it. In fact, you embrace it. Another frenzied kiss of daring tongues and roaming hands against the places that felt so familiar to the both of you.

Just as the kiss goes rogue and his lips sloppily traipse down to your jaw, you feel a small droplet roll down your cheek. One that didn’t belong to you.

A quiet sob is preceded by a sentence that rips your heart out of your chest.

“I never wanted to. I never wanted to let you go.”

“Ashton,” you murmur, feeling your eyes welling up just the same, “I—I didn’t know—”

He interrupts your thought with a string of kisses down your neck towards your chest. His hands roam with fervor, feeling you up as though you were the last thing he would ever be allowed or able to touch. You embraced his blistered hands and the way they knew every crease and divot in your body, how effortless he was at drawing you back in.

“I never knew how to get you in front of me to actually say the things on my mind but now that I have you I just— I couldn’t fight the pain in my chest when I looked into your eyes for the first time.” His rambling was trailing off into muffled sniffling and staccato phrasing; it was causing you physical pain to hear him this way.

“I just assumed you hated me. I thought you never wanted to see me again, Ash. Why didn’t you say this sooner?”

“What? No. No, I don’t hate you,” he defends, still solemn, “I just— didn’t know how to reach out. It took me a lot to swallow my pride and send you that text, Y/N… I’ve never been good at communicating.”

“Tell me about it,” you break the tension with a lighthearted hand, but remnants of your feelings for him lingered above your head like a storm cloud.

“But my actions have consequences, I’ve learned… I’d drive past your house and it’d take everything in me not to bang on your front door and drop down to my knees. Beg you to forgive me for everything I put you through… Everything I do reminds me of you in some way and— it was hard to even think about the two of us existing in the same universe without the other by our sides. It just, it didn’t feel natural—”

You felt sorrowful enough to place a kiss on his cheek as he rambled on, masking tears of your own and letting them drip down his cheek.

“— And when you told me ‘no’ after I’d asked you on a whim to come here, I thought it was over. My entire life flashed before my eyes and you weren’t in it and it just— it fucking killed me.”

“But Ashton, I’m here,” you say, watching his face deconstruct into more of a manic expression as he digressed, “I’m not going anywhere.”

“I know you’re here. You’re here now and— I know you always told me to live in the moment, but fuck. There’s so much left to say.”

You cup his jaw and tilt his gaze back into yours, after it had wandered behind your head as it always seemed to do.

“I’m sure there’s a lot to say but Ashton, you’ve made up your mind. That’s just… the way things go.”

Another tear falls rogue from his malachite eyes and your thumb is there to catch it. His gaze is gut-wrenching, plucking at every single one of your impulses and all of the progress you’ve made in getting over him.

“Is it too late to change that?”

Your mind starts reeling. The words you’d never thought you’d hear coming from his mouth were finally out in the open and there was no sign of him taking them back. The initial issue was his lack of communication but fuck, you didn’t know it would come back to bite you so soon.

You’d be lying if you said you hadn’t thought about sending him a simple text to meet for coffee in hopes to ‘change his mind’, but it seemed as though he was thinking about it just as much as you were. There was no point in fighting it anymore. The two of you were meant for each other. If a month of no contact was all it took for him to realize how much he needed you…

…Then maybe that random Tuesday night wasn’t the worst thing after all.

[babyisa1]

⋆.ೃ࿔*:･ party in the maldives/ TOM

warnings: alcohol, slightly smutty towards the end, pretty funny/fluffy, swearing

1:45am

you heard the waves clashing in the backround along with a warm breeze flowing in your faces as you locked hands with tom, walking towards the open bar on the beach. your heels click on the wooden path as you near it, tom sending you a quick smile as the booming of the music gets louder.

„LETS GET THIS FUCKING PARTY STARTED!!“ bill shouts, pushing between you and tom and sprinting towards the bar, bombarding the barman with different drink orders. the poor guy barely understood english, let alone english with a thick german accent.

„fucking hell, someones excited“ tom laughs, turning around to see georg and gustav chuckling aswell. you smile, grabbing toms hand again as you enter the bar, thankfully not that crowded. you could feel the beats of the music through your feet as you walk up to the bar to order some drinks. „a line of the strongest shots you have please“ you state, smiling brightly at the barman who sends you a wink before bending down and rummaging through the storage under the top.

„i dont feel like shots baby..“ tom mentions, „we dont either, well have a beer“ georg and gustav agree, you look at them with your eyebrows furrowed. „um, these are all for me, idiots“ you scoff, turning back around to the bar and seeing the colourful shots perfectly lined up on a palm tree decorated board.

you throw your head back, downing the shots while you feel the hot alcohol burn as it trickled down your throat. it was a good burn though, which powered you to finish them all. „holy shit are you insane? im the one thats going to have to deal with your drunk ass later!“ tom remarks, his eyes widened. you laugh, already starting to feel your body buzzing as you walk away from the bar to find bill.

your jaw almost unhinges from your face as you spot bill making out with a girl in the corner, his hands feeling up her body as they basically ate each others faces off. you giggle, feeling proud of bill as he usually was super shy, a total softie. you strut towards the dance floor, loosening up as you begin to sway your hips to the beat.

half an hour later

your dancing was sensual and in control in the beginning, but now the amount of shots you took earlier hit you like a truck. not to mention the few cocktails you had in between. you stumbled slightly through the club, looking for tom as he didnt join you to dance. a bright smile tugs on your face when you spot him just outside, smoking a cigarette as he takes in the beach view.

even though you were absolutely plastered, you couldnt ignore his beauty. the sky was pricked with stars, and the warm salty breeze from the ocean softly blew into toms face. he didnt seem drunk though, maybe a little tipsy as he knew he had to be somewhat sober to take care of you.

„tommmm where wherw yu i missd youu“ you slurred, tripping over your heels as tom swiftly caught you in his arms, dropping his cigarette. „god youre so drunk.. are you okay? do you have to puke?“ tom asks lovingly, putting the cigarette out with his shoe.

„noo *hiccup* .. im finee lets go for a walk!“ you exclaim, grabbing toms hand as you throw your heels off and run on the sand. you and tom laugh loudly as you both run across the beach, it was like no one else existed and you two were in your own little bubble. you accidentally step on your long flowy dress, causing you to faceplant on the sand as you take tom down with you.

you two groan slightly in pain, but after a few moments of silence you burst into laughter. „i bet your heavy ass broke a couple of my ribs“ you laugh, tom now laying flat on his back on the warm sand as you both face the sky. the laughing dies down after a while, as toms takes your hand into his and softly grazes his thumb across it.

„the view is gorgeous..“ you sigh out, mesmerised by the sparkly stars above you both. „it sure is“ tom replies, before you turn your head towards him. he was staring at you the whole time, causing your face to flush bright red.

it was special moments like this when you realized how deep your love and connection for eachother was. it was unconditional. he gazed at you which so much love, you swore your heart was going to jump out of your chest.

the faded beat of the music still played in the backround, causing you to snap out of you trance and lift yourself on your feet, your head pounding slightly as you were still drunk. you strip yourself completely naked before running towards the water. „join me tom, dont be a pussy!“ your shout, giggling. tom gasps, whipping his head to the bar (to see if anyone was looking) so fast he almost got whiplash. he hesitated a bit, before mumbling under his breath; „god- fuck it“

he quickly took his clothes off, running towards you as the cold water made him shiver. you both were now chest deep in the water, and tom pulls you into a hug to keep warm. with your chest flush against his, you wrap your arms around his neck, smiling. you begin to plant soft open mouthed kisses on his neck, causing him to relax at your touch. „mm..“ you hum in between kisses; „your so fucking hot..“ you breath out, grabbing his hand and pulling it underwater to feel how wet you are.

he groans lowly in satisfaction, before quickly coming to his senses. „we cant baby.. not here and not with you like this..“ he whispers, referring to your drunken state. you ignore him, smirking playfully as you find his sweet spot, just below his ear. his chest heaves up and down heavily, as your hand trails along his toned abdomen, towards his heat. „shit.. youre driving me insane y/n“ he breaths out, almost giving in when he takes you by surprise and picks you up, bridal style. he walks you both over the your pile of clothes in the sand as you whine out of disapointment.

just as you both were about to get dressed, you hear distant screaming coming from the bar. both your heads shoot up, witnessing bill and the rest of the band with total shock on their faces.

„WHAT THE FUCK-" gustav exclaims, his hand flying to his mouth. georg bursted out into laughter, and bill cant believe his eyes. „woahhh i don’t remember drinking that much.. is that tom and y/n butt naked over there?“ bill asks in confusion, rubbing his eyes.

„oh theyre real alright!“ georg blurts out between laughs, holding his cramping stomach.

.·:*¨༺ ༻¨*:·.

this wasnt proof read so i apologize if its shit, but i rlly liked the idea of this oneshot :) hope you all enjoyed!

[99tech99]

PRESENTING MY FIRST FANFIC/SMUT PIECE!!

guys, i am so excited about this!! it is sooo self indulgent but im really proud of how it turned out.

it was inspired by this picture and the thot of biting off krennic’s glove so he can finger fuck you at his desk.

my friend told me i was unhinged to be jealous of an inanimate object, but o well 😅

WARNINGS: 18+ SMUT MINORS DNI GO AWAY, super self indulgent sorry not sorry, finger fucking, p in v, unprotected sex, age gap, a little bit of degradation, a little bit of possession, a hint of voyeurism at the end

like i said, this is my first attempt at this, so i would be very thankful for any and all types of feedback!

1.9k words under cut!

Krennic was getting annoyed with you, but it was hardly your fault. He had promised he would leave the office four hours ago and it was now three hours past your dinner reservation, yet he showed no sign that he was finished handling the day’s business. You could always give up on the evening, retire to your quarters, and hang up the exquisite gown you purchased for the occasion. But his all-consuming work with Stardust had kept Krennic away from the capital for months. There was no way you would voluntarily remove him from your sight.

And so you stayed, making yourself at home in the luxurious sitting area of Krennic’s office, getting ahead on your own work for the next week, replying to comms, and sifting through through the Imperial files Krennic had sent you that he thought would be of interest to you in your role as Senator of Kuat.

But you had finished that an hour ago. You had sighed and paced and poured yourself a drink and watched the sun sink below the Coruscant skyline as the city planet came alive with the night. You threw yourself down petulantly on the chaise lounge with yet another exasperated sigh. A clearing of his throat alerted you that your behavior was wearing thin on Krennic’s patience.

You studied the man before you. Even being in the same room with Krennic was intoxicating. Highly intelligent, unmatched aspiration, sharp wit, electric blue eyes, silver hair…even the way he took that silly Imperial cape so seriously. Yes, he did have a temper and dealt ruthlessly with his enemies, but Stardust was indispensable to the fate of the galaxy. Half measures could hardly be tolerated.

It was no wonder you had fallen for him. All in all, Director Orson Krennic was undeniably one of the most desirable men in the galaxy. And he was the only one for you.

You could take it no longer.

You headed straight to Krennic’s desk, and leaning against it, crossed your arms and scowled down at him. At long last his concentration broke and he glanced up at you with an eyebrow raised and a most dissatisfied glare on his face.

“Well?” you demanded.

He held your gaze for a moment longer. He gave no response but sighed heavily and returned his attention to his datapad and holofiles.

Anyone else in the galaxy might have withered at his reaction, but you weren’t anyone in the galaxy.

Smiling to yourself, you took his left hand off the desk and brought to your face. Krennic didn’t react, but continued to peruse his files as though you weren’t even there. You inhaled the scent of leather and briefly nuzzled your cheek into the soft material. Slowly, you brought your mouth down onto his thumb, swirling your tongue around the digit and down onto his palm before grazing gently up with your teeth, pulling his thumb it out of your mouth with a soft pop.

You gave him a covert sidelong glance. Krennic had almost imperceptibly shifted his position in his chair, but otherwise he was working as diligently as before. Absolutely aware of the effect you were having on him, you smirked internally. You bit the tip of the glove and began to work it off his thumb with your teeth. You did the same with his index finger, and middle finger, making your way down his hand until his hand was bare. You let the glove drop from your mouth to the floor.

You placed yourself on the edge of Krennic’s desk as he continued to type a memo with his right hand. Taking advantage of your gown’s high slit you spread your thighs and guided Krennic’s fingers into your slick folds.

At long last he reacted. By gods how this man knew your body. Slowly and methodically he curled his index and middle fingers inside you, reaching the very spot he knew you craved most. You angled your hips upward, willing him to reach deeper still. You fought to keep your breathing steady as he increased his pace and pressure inside you. The sound of Krennic’s fingers sliding in and out of your wet cunt echoed through the silent office. Your breaths were shallow and uneven now. The challenge of trying to remain quiet while Krennic was composing a memo somehow only made you wetter.

You gasped as his thumb made contact with your clit. You bit your lip to keep yourself from crying out. As his thumb continued to trace circles over your bud you felt a heat rising in your core. You closed your eyes and tried to keep yourself from cumming too quickly. You wanted to savor this pleasure but you were close, so close…

Suddenly he withdrew his fingers. You whined in protest at the emptiness. Your eyes snapped open to see Krennic standing in front of you.

“Well, my dear, you certainly have been disruptive this evening,” he said in a severe tone.

“I’ve said exactly one word,” you replied icily, trying to catch your breath. “Now that you’re finished ignoring me, am I to assume you’re done with work?”

Krennic looked down at his left hand.

“It would hardly seem I’ve ignored you.” He looked back at you and brought fingers to his mouth to clean them of your juices.

“However, there is one matter left I have left to attend to.”

Before you could open your mouth to protest he had pulled you into a fierce kiss. You opened your mouth and tasted yourself on his tongue. The bulge of erection pressed against you. Krennic tugged the straps of your gown over your shoulders exposing your tits. Krennic took one of your breasts in his mouth and the other in his hand. You shuddered as his tongue and fingers played over your nipples. You shrugged off the dress entirely, letting it pool on the floor at your feet.

“Oh I missed you,” you sighed.

Your hands groped for his belt and fumbled with the fastenings of his pants. You felt his erection become even more rigid under your touch. You ran your hand up and down his length with all the firm pressure you knew he could take.

Krennic took half a step back to drink in the sight of you, naked and yearning before him. “Oh, you’re beautiful,” Krennic murmured. You grabbed him by the shoulders of that ridiculous cape of his, pulling his lips to back to yours. Your kisses became sloppy and needy. He unbuttoned his tunic as you continued to kiss his mouth, jaw, neck, anywhere your lips could reach. “Fuck me,” you demanded.

He chucked softly. “Fuck you what?”

“Fuck me now!” you insisted.

“No…” He teased your clit with the tip of his cock which already dripping with precum. “Orson, please” you whimpered.

Any restraint he had earlier in the evening was gone at the sound of his name tumbling from your lips. You inhaled sharply as he sank his cock into you. “Always so tight for me,” he moaned. Aroused as you were, you needed a moment to adjust to his girth, but he didn’t give you a moment. With his hands holding firmly around your hips, he groaned with each rapid thrust into your pussy.

You placed your hands on the edge of the desk to brace yourself. The pain of the stretch quickly gave way to the ecstasy of how perfectly he filled you. Wrapping your legs around his waist, you arched your back and tilted your hips so Krennic’s cock hit your most sensitive spot with every thrust.

“What a display,” Krennic smirked as his eyes traveled down your body from your tits to his dick inside you. “The little Senator whoring herself out to the Imperial Director.”

“Don’t act so superior,” you countered breathlessly. “You’re the one coming halfway across the galaxy for my pussy.”

He leaned forward and nipped your earlobe. “Mmm, not cumming yet darling.”

He continued to pound his dick into your dripping wet heat. He fully laid you down onto his desk and leaned into you. The last vestiges of your composure were slipping. You wound your fingers through his hair and bit down on his shoulder, wondering how much longer you could keep whatever semblance of quiet you were maintaining.

“Go on,” Krennic instructed as though reading your mind. “There won’t be anyone in the corridor to hear you. And if there is,” he smiled triumphantly, “I want them to know what I do to you.”

Your cries quickly became louder and more desperate. “Orson, I’m so close” you gasped.

His pace never slackened. “I know exactly how close you are,” he managed to pant. “And why is that?”

“I’m yours.”

“What’s mine?” he promoted.

“My cunt.”

“Mhmm, my cunt,” he affirmed. His thumb found your clit again, applying a steady circular pressure.

That was all it took to push you over the edge. Your walls contracted around his thick cock as the waves of your orgasm washed over you, leaving you gasping for breath.

Krennic groaned at the added stimulation as you came, but never broke his pace. In the afterglow of your orgasm, you felt yourself getting overstimulated. You squirmed under his thumb. “Too much” you choked.

“My cunt,” Krennic repeated. “I’m done with you when I am done.”

You felt yourself growing lightheaded as another orgasm threatened to overtake you. Krennic’s breathing was ragged as his technique became sloppier.

“Cum for me,” you begged.

On principle he resisted, trying to hold back, but you knew him too well to let him get away with that.

“Orson, cum with me.”

Almost instantly you felt his release at the same time your orgasm ripped through your body. Your cries and his intermingled as he continued to fuck you through your high. He gave a few last thrusts as your body became limp.

He planted a tender kiss on your forehead, an affection he rarely bestowed. “You are kriffing magnificent,” he said as he straightened up.

“So you did miss me,” you teased. “It was difficult to tell.”

Krennic smiled wistfully as he helped you get unsteadily to your feet. “And I’ll be missing you again much too soon. Tarkin has summoned me to Jedha on the next rotation. Saw and his rebels must be made an example of.”

The dismay you felt at the news Krennic was leaving almost immediately was quickly replaced by excitement.

“Are you testing —”

“I can’t say,” he interrupted.

Your face shone with anticipation. “You will,” you assured him. “And it will be a rousing triumph. Tarkin, Thrawn, anyone who ever doubted Stardust will put to shame in the midst of your achievement.”

“Thank you darling. But until tomorrow I just need to focus on you. Come home with me and let’s have a repeat performance.”

You slipped your gown back on and Krennic reassembled his uniform.

The two of you made your way to the office door. When it opened you were both face to face with Brierly Ronan who had clearly been trying to eavesdrop. You fought back a laugh.

“Assistant Director Ronan,” you exclaimed brightly. “Late evening for you?” He glared daggers at you.

“Director, I —” he began.

“Not now, Ronan. You can see I am otherwise engaged. Or perhaps you heard?”

Ronan flushed.

“We can speak on the way to the rendezvous with Tarkin. Good night,” said Krennic dismissively.

With that you pulled Krennic by the hand toward the turbolifts. Only then did you realize his left hand was without a glove. You held up his hand.

“Missing something?” you asked with a coy smile.

He quickly pressed the back of your hand to his lips. “Well worth it, my dear.”

thank you for reading!!!

Back to the Master List

tagging some of the people who have interacted with my previous krennic posts or expressed interest in my writing:

@clonebrainrot @znerac @msjackson1073 @sinker003

and unsolicited tags of @zoeykallus and @spicy-clones i know this isnt clones, but you are both so talented and i love your writing so so much and seeing everything you post on here really gave me the inspiration and ovaries to write my own fic.

[hearts4youz]

The Captains Daughter- Chapter 14

A/N: UGHHHHHH long wait again, im sorry!! just been so busy. I hope to get to publishing faster soon. this one is half assed. im not proud of it at all :( Enjoy chapter 14 yalls!!!

Taglist: @abbiesxox @n30n-j3lly @weird-katthing @kayoyamamegame @kroowonderemporium @astro-ghoul99

Word count: 800

Ghost pov:

Somehow, even deep inside the woods, covered in mud and grime, exhausted and sweaty, Y/N is still the most beautiful woman i've ever seen. Her face when she gets frustrated when we make a wrong turn is so adorable, I think i'm smitten.

There's no denying it at this point, i'm way too far down the rabbit hole.

I've recovered now after being sick last week. Y/N sure helped a lot. I think it was her presence that seemed to magically cure me. I can't stop picturing the hour we spent together, us talking, her taking care of me. It was just so domestic, so far from the violence and horror of the military. I've never pictured myself involved in anything besides the SAS, let alone romance.

Fucking hell, this girl has me wrapped around her finger.

And she doesn't even know it.

Because i'm a cold, composed soldier.

Romance and feelings have no place in my heart.

Well... maybe just for Y/N they do.

My thoughts are shaken by Price giving orders.

"A pilot just radioed, there's enemy choppers on his radar, it's not safe for us all to stick together. Gaz, Ghost, and I will walk east. Soap and Y/N to the north. Keep your eyes peeled for combatants in the area. Remember the goal, find the store of hidden weapons."

A chorus of 'copies' and 'affirmatives' ring through the air. Everyone is calm, but I feel distressed.

Y/N and I are in opposite groups.

How will I protect her?

What if something happens to her?

She'll be with Soap... she should be fine, right?

She'll be with soap.

Alone. Just him and her. In the woods. On a mission.

Jealousy corrupts my mind.

She's not into him... is she?

I take a breath, thankful once again for the mask to hide my pissed expression as our groups spread apart. I resist taking one last glance at Y/N as she walks in the other direction with Soap. I still have to maintain my reserved image. No one can know about this little... crush.

The word makes me feel the need to wash my mouth out.

Crush

It just sounds so unlike me, so soft and boyish. I am a soldier, a big, tough killing machine.

"What's on your mind, Ghost?" Gaz quizzes.

"Ah...um...nothing," I lie.

"Bullshit, you took a day off last week for the first time EVER, and you've been way quieter than normal ever since."

"M' just recovering, bad flu I guess" I say sheepishly.

Gaz sighs. "The Simon Riley I know doesn't take time for recovery, unless hes been SHOT" Gaz rebuttles.

I stay silent.

"I think you've got Y/N on the brain," Gaz says quieter, so the captain wouldn't here us discussing my crush on his daughter.

"What the hell Gaz, that's ludicrous," I try to defend myself.

Gaz continues to talk about my supposed crush on Y/N, I do all I can to deny it, until finally, I give in.

"Okay! Okay! yeah, fine. I'm interested in her." I say quiet enough to not capture the attention of Price, who walks ahead, blissfully unaware of the fact that we are discussing his myself as a possible love interest for his daughter.

Gaz smirks "We all know, by the way."

"Everyone!? even price?"

"Oh hell no, not price. He'd skin you alive."

"I don't blame him, i'm older than Y/N, I look kinda... edgy. I'm not the guy you want around your daughter."

"Hey, maybe he'll come around. He knows you already, you're a protector, a provider. I think that's exactly the kind of guy you want your daughter to date," Gaz tries to reassure me.

"Eh... maybe your right"

"You've just got to ask her out first."

Fuck.

I forgot about that.

*TIMESKIP*

Hours later, we continue to trudge through the woods. Our radios begin to crackle.

Soap's voice comes through the communication device.

"Weapons secured. Send your coordinates, we've radioed for an exfil."

The three of us sigh in relief.

"Alright, were out of here boys." Price says with a smile.

The helicopter touches down in the distance, we jog over to it and hop into the cab. As I hop inside, Y/N offers me a kind smile and moves to sit next to me. I feel my face heat up, thankfully covered by my mask. Soap wiggles his eyebrows at me and gestures towards Y/N while making kissy faces.

Ugh.

but then I look over at her, taking in her (hair color) hair as she gazes at the woods below us. It looks so soft and silky, well maintained and clean. A rarity in the military.

Fucking hell, i've fallen hard.

[kureasblog]

Tuesdayyy🧪🩼

First of all the car ride with my father wasn’t that bad and we didn’t even fight so it was good.

Is soon as I arrived I saw a friend who I love so much who is just glowing and authentic and she has that “I don’t give a fuck about other peoples opinion” mindset, that I really admire. She’s really an inspiration for me.

we had math which was fun and philosophy-boring asf. sorry but it’s the way my teacher is istg.

then we had physics, i hate our current chapter. at the end of the hour he gave us back our chemistry exams and i got a GREAT GRADEEE😙 (half of the class has below average) i literally took my face in my hands and said something so loud like « OMG YES » (kinda awkward) and when i left the class i was SMI-LING. the teacher said like ‘nice to see a smile on ur face’ does that mean ur calling me depressed??💀 i mean tbh im not doing well recently but i didnt know it was THAT noticeable god. i mean he s so sweet n really care about his students + im a special needs student (« handicapped ») so ig he kinda looks out for me.

then we had biology, nothing much. i was sitting just in front of L. it’d be cool if he was in front, i could kinda glance at him but if he is behind me i just feel anxious and overthink everything i do and im like ‘how do i look from the back’ ‘is my bun looking dumb’ ‘what if i have acne on my back’. Like girllll who cares. he’s human, so r you. relax. but i just CANT focus on the lesson. And when i looked behind he was manspreading (guilty of finding it lowkey hot) and talking abt how he failed his test.. (too badd for youuuuu personally i did NOT🤭)(yes yes i like him but i prefer being the best)

then we had lunch with friends (some bitches annoyed me but whatever) glanced at 🚪 M but he never fff notices me, then we went to study at the library (i got YELLED at for chatting when it’s supposed to be a quiet place when every body else was talking but i mean poor lady that’s literally her only job to shush people🙁 like- i was having fun, you’re never having fun, i get it. jealousy’s though.)

Then we had spanish, it was normal. Then we had english it was soooo funnnn🤭

So like no one laughed at our English project which we wanted to be funny but ppl in our class are stuck up and probably found it cringe butttt my group couldnt stop laughing so that’s what matters hehe. they all did serious projects but just filming themselves blank staring at the camera but that’s kinda the embarrassing part to me.

- basically we had to present a project that we filmed at home in groups about a festival we’d create so we were kind of all acting (I was the economic manager xD)and the video of L’s🧪 group was so fun and they were all embarrassed to watch the video in class and they were all red -because it’s awkward to see ur own face projected on the huge screen- which was soooo funny to watch. Personally, I wasn’t really embarrassed about my own face because we didn’t film ourselves from up close but kind of like a report and the camera was moving and I was just really exaggerating my acting n giggling.

also my hair was down and even though i was all red and puffy from sweat i felt pretty.

i just wanted to keep glancing at L, i had to stop myself. also he was so cute n funny in the video istg. he just does this eyebrow raise idk how to explain it but like when he’s proud of himself whatever. whateverrrrr😽 (CUTE >:D)

so then had a break before the 2 hour exam (im in the same exam room as 🩼A’s class)

basically he’s in the same class as one of my best friends so im often in his classroom. and i was hanging out with my friend and he was revising for the exam right after- well, there. i mean it’s his classroom after all-. And there was a former classmate talking with us and i was purposely laughing so cute and doing doe eyes bcs.. bcs leave me alone. I can’t function when he’s near. I HATE HIM. And his goddman black eyes. 😞

And istg i could feel his stare in my direction. but. am i crazy? am i schizophrenic? if he was indeed looking at me, was it positively? was he judging me? was he thinking ‘why is she always here omg so annoying’? like. i know what i gotta do. whenever i feel like he is staring at me, i have to look up and check if he really is. that way i’ll be sure. after tomorrow it’s Thursday, he always glances at me on the day when im waiting in front of their classroom, so that day i’ll actually look up and see if he is staring at me. If he is, i’ll do a little squint like -dude were u staring at me???? to make him embarrassed. or. do a double check. that’s SO a hint of ´i noticed you’. Idk what to doooo

Anyway. I failed my biology exam but everybody did. tomorrow biggg study day.

[batking4342]

My Art journey so far! @snowglobe-system heard me constantly going "oh I wish I could draw" "If I could draw I'd draw..." And he kept going "then do it." He gave me access to a free art program (FireAlpaca if you're curious). I tried, it didn't work, but I kept it on my laptop. Then one day, we're talking about fursonas, and I say "hey! Maybe I can try that". So as we're having a sleepover, we're sat next to each other, drawing our furry little guys (@snows-realistic-warriors-designs if you want to see their art), I'm constantly going "Hey Snow, how do you do this. How do you do that" and constantly looking at their screen to get ideas on how to draw the body. Each art piece I took on after that,gave me more challenges. I learned half the art process was "ah fuck, ah fuck... shit." and erasing. but I did it! I completed three pieces! if I get time, next year I might even join artfight!

More stuff under the cut.

With The first one, Flora the Fox the specific things I'm proud of:

the fashion

using the flower tool to put flowers in her hair\

using the opacity to get a better fur colour on the hands and feet

the freckles

the boobs

it's my first successful digital drawing in this era.

With Battle Axe Bee (Yes I know that's a great axe, I mixed it up in the beginning and now I can't change it) the Dwarf.

First humanoid

body type

I took a full hour detailing that cloak

another hour doing each individual flower

I discovered the oil paint brush and it's SO good for details.

I did hands!

I learned how to do shading on the eyes

With Nerali the Tiefling, Zyvan the High Elf, and Smith the Tabaxi.

I learned how to do general shading

hair details!

fur highlights!

the wolf bite on Nerali's stomach!

Nerali's outfit, seriously it slays.

Smith and Zyvan's outfits are really detailed, and Im so proud of that.

Drawing that cowboy hat took FOREVER.

getting Zyvan's pose right was a HASSLE. There was also a lot of reworking I had to do.

the grassy mound

the sky (I put stripes of colour, then blurred the shit out of it)

the clouds

Smith's tail

in general, this one was a lot of time and hard work. I started working on it June 28th, and while there were some days I took away from it, this still took like a MONTH.

[theodoraflowerday]

heartstopper s3e2 live episode reaction

and it's gonna start to get so much worse I wanna bask on that final scene for a little longer

bro it took me one hour to watch a half hour episode

"shame mom had to pull out" honestly yeah it's such a shame I'm gonna miss Sarah so much this season

but also HELLO AUNT PEGGY CARTER

oh he wrote it down lmao me too charlie

OH. OH OKAY CHARLES

bro and by the end of this they're gonna be having sex idk how I'm gonna cope

tori's face.... she's always so worried about charlie I get her so much

oh my god

JANE STOP

TORI SPRING CHARLIE'S #1 DEFENDER

"can you please not undermine me like that in front of him" stop making her do your job then she's a *child*

I see julio's prob not gonna be in this season either lol bc that was his line not tori's

oh my god auntie diane didn't know (or at least not officially bc i know sarah was gushing over charlie)

bro and nick came out to her just like that....... my baby boy I'm so proud of him

"you know me" "I do" oh I BET y'all do

"I'll be good" "not too good tho" OOHHHHHH AYEEEEEEEEEE

I know in the comics they've only been dating for a year and I know they're probably at MOST late 20s but please can we have a nathan/youssef wedding in s4 (at least just a mention)

STOP DARCY'S GRANDMA IS SO WHOLESOME please don't be transphobic

not sahar saying she's unsurprised about imogen's high drama grade skfjdkfk y'all are gonna be the messiest gfs

oh darcy baby

ALL NINES??????

OXBRIDGE PREP GROUP AAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAA LETS FUCKIN GO TARA

"exams mean nothing" oh tori baby

omg nick did terrible at math he's so relatable I love him

oh wait he passed math. is it obvious I'm not english lmao

"NEVER IN DOUBT" oh uncle rick you'll always be famous

god please let charlie go to menorca with nick's family next year please

oh that's not great

NOT A SHIRTLESS SELFIE NICHOLAS YOU WHORE

oh isaac youll get used to this don't worry (yes worry)

OH HELLO JACK MADDOX

"you're abandoning me again" god every time tori speaks it tugs at my heartstrings

"I don't wanna see mum" and she accepts it.... greatest big sister in the world bro

oh char

CATCH PLANES NOT FEELINGS LMFAOOOOOOO IMOGEN I LOVE YOU

OH AUNTIE DIANE IS A PSYCHIATRIST LETS GOOOOOOO TEAM PSYCH

oh nick baby talk to her she's about the single most qualified person you could be talking about this to

oh I love you darcy's grandma you're so cute

darcy giving away her skirts..... or should I say THEIR SKIRTS. LET'S GO NB DARCY

oh tori

oh tori no

oh my god tori no

bro tori is breaking my heart CAN WE GET MICHAEL HERE WE NEED SUNSHINE

TAO NOOOOOOOOOO

"I wish I'd sat still" oh no

bro this show is gonna fuck me up

Isaac being worried about charlie 😭 also isaac being annoyed is SO ME I'd be smacking them left and right like wow

NOT ELLE COPYING TAO'S "RRRUDE"

ISAAC WENT TO CHECK ON CHARLIE what the fuck no one appreciates isaac enough what the fuck

oh they're watching a movie :( bffs :(

I love them so much your honor

also where are imogen and sahar I miss them :(

oh my GOD TORI IS ON TUMBLR

HER BEST FRIENDS HER BROTHER I LOVE YOU TORIIII

I know this season probably kills any solitaire adaptation hopes but I would have loved to see solitaire :(

omg julio IS here and being horrible at cooking!

OH MY GOD SHES LOOKING AT HIS LAPTOP

TORI'S TEXTING NICK OH MY H OD

tori 🤝 nick -> being charlie's #1 stans

OH MY GOD SHE SAID ILY

BRO THATS SO CUTEEEEEEEEEE I LOVE THEM

oh my god that's so horrifying

god you can *feel* his anxiety

I'm preemptively crying don't mind me

I was right to start preemptively crying that was *so* bad oh my god

bro charlie's face how he can't contain the tears i

im not gonna cope well with any of this

oh god im literally *sobbing*

my cat heard me sobbing, started kneading on my legs for like a few seconds and then left lmao skfkskfldkf tjsgs not good none of this is great

there's no way that was the ending

they just had me sobbing my eyes out and were like "ok time for a break" ok THANKS

please give both joe and kit like a thousand emmys

[someonechaotic]

Don't hang up yet... I'm not done.

(Sims 4 strangerville build WOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO-)

I'm an expert, I'm the one. The one who was right all along, better to be laughed at than wrong.

IN THE SUPER SAR-GASSO SEAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAA!!!!

I mean- cough

Okay, come on, you have to admit that Touch-Tone Telephone suits Strangerville (it's by Lemon Demon you should check him out hes super cool and im hyperfixated and i am getting distracted)

focus

This build took me a handful of hours and the edits took me an hour and a half but by the power of caffeinated ADHD i still feel like i could build several more strangerville houses on top of that followed up by a strangerville book followed up by making my own fashion statement folowed up by taking over the world and possessing people by becoming the funny plant myself followed up by contacting alien life and concending to outer space then

can i please not flood this blog

wait in real time i just had a realization that this whole time i was hyperfixated because i downed a can of irn bru and was able to focus

okay thats it im putting a keep reading cut so i dont bombard you with my yapping and dumb images

oh oh! heres a few images that didnt get used, the last one is a picture of whats inside the shed

Also, i did make a house like this previously, but my dumb ass forgot to add a bedroom to the top floor, and even though Dumbass enjoys basements, he'd like the extra room space for more clutter, theories and ₱Ⱡ₳₦₮₴, and also people may point out the fact that he only appears to have a kitchen, a living room and a bathroom.

At least here the only thing people will be pointing out now is the strange flora!

oh yeah i mention dumbass because the previous house i made was for him, and now i like this one better.... and it suits him..... and i did kind of base the whole house off him because i am too obsessed over my own fictional character

anyway, my rambling is up, im super proud of this house, SHIT I JUST REMEMBERED TO GET SIMS STUDIO FAST FUCK DO TAGS QUICK

[iris-writesx]

we could leave the christmas lights up ‘til january | stede x ed x izzy

read it here or read it on ao3 <3

this was supposed to be the fic that introduced the au, so if you like just pretend this one came first. though, none of the fics in the au necessarily have to be read in order, it will just be a bunch of one shots for this idea!!

but i’ve only written fluff once for this fandom and not even this trio, so it’s overdue. i feel like this fic is a bit meh but it’s definitely more to provide some context for the au. i spent so long working on all of their backstories im actually pretty proud of them akdjwjr

off note and it doesn’t matter but i started the bbc show “uncle” that con o’neill is in (yes i watched it for him) and it’s actually really good and i am SO in love with val <3

but enjoy!! please tell me what you think / what you’d like to see for this au :)

title is from “lover” by taylor swift x

2.2k words — modern day au, domestic fluff, christmas, ed suffers from chronic pain

more from this au; and now i see daylight

༶•┈┈୨♡୧┈┈•༶

Ed was fucking tired.

It was almost eight o’clock by the time that he finally pulled into the driveway, and all he planned on doing was having a shower, and going to bed. He didn’t even fancy his dinner, which he knew Stede would've kept in the fridge ready for him to heat up.

He didn’t like Fridays. Fridays were the only day that Izzy and Stede got out of work a good couple of hours before Ed did, and he didn’t like being left out on their time together.

But he was home now. He could just… relax.

It didn’t help that his knee had been killing him all day, which, he would admit, was his fault. He had woken up a lot later than he should have, and in his rush to get ready and leave the house he had forgotten to put on his knee brace. Which basically fucked his leg for the whole day, considering his work was all pretty manual.

Ed had been working at the garage for coming up three years, and he loved it. He loved the fact that he was always bustling about doing something, something that kept his mind and hands occupied. It had taken some time to fall into the flow of his work schedule, but he had and he was so thankful for that.

It had been Izzy who had originally gotten him the job. At the time, Izzy had also worked there. It was the first thing that he had helped him with after Ed had gotten out of rehab.

Of course, Izzy didn’t work there anymore; after he’d lost his leg, there was no chance of him filling his post back up there. But Stede had been kind enough to offer him a job in the little café tucked away in his library.

Ed didn’t mind working without either of his partners there. It just meant that seeing them again after work was even more exciting, something he looked forwards to every day he was apart from them.

His eyes screwed, wincing as he turned to get out of the car. He didn’t even bother grabbing his bag, in his urge to just relax. He could sort that shit out in the morning. Ed was just looking forwards to his warm house, his partners, and some peace and quiet.

…which, he realised when he opened the door, he would not be getting just yet.

The first thing he heard was Stede’s rambling. Stede, bless him, did ramble all the time, granted. But it was one of those do as I say rambles, one he usually ended up using on Ed actually.

Though, for once, it wasn’t directed at him, but at Izzy.

“…be half an hour max and we can do the rest tomorrow, or I can just do it all myself tonight. What do you think, the red? Or the green? I do have more of the green but the red goes better with the gold-”

“Jesus Christ.” Izzy sounded as wiped out as Ed felt.

Ed shrugged his coat from his shoulders, and kicked his shoes off on the rug that Stede had put out now that the wetter weather was more common than not. The warmth of the house was like heaven, and he took a moment to just stand there, leant against the wall as Stede carried on his rambling in the living room.

The colder weather was never favourable, his knee always hurt worse in the cold even with the brace. But without it? He doubted he’d be able to be on his feet for too long the next day, but luckily it was Saturday, which they all had off of work.

Thank fuck.

After he realised that he had been stood there for too long, Ed finally made his way from the hallway into the living room and- just stopped in the doorway. Staring.

“What the fuck is all this?”

Pretty much the entire floor space was covered with different Christmas decorations — ornaments, tinsel, fairy lights, the lot. In the middle of it all knelt on the floor, unsurprisingly, was Stede. He had a rope of tinsel in one hand, the other dug into a box which seemed to just contain more of the shit.

Izzy was tucked up in his armchair by the fireplace, and seemed to be pointedly ignoring the mess around him, as he had his phone in his hand and a blanket draped over his lap.

“Ed!” Stede whipped his head around and smiled, like a fucking holiday bomb hadn’t been deployed in their living room. “I didn’t hear you come in, I’m a little preoccupied. What colour do you like best? Izzy isn’t being helpful in the slightest.”

Izzy scoffed. “Told you to toss it all, didn't I?”

“Oh don’t be such a Scrooge, Israel.”

Ed was still stood in the doorway, blinking at the room in front of him. He knew that Stede was fond of traditions and holidays — he had been awfully skilled at decorating the house for Halloween, had actually scared a good few kids with the fuckery he put outside the house. But they hadn’t really talked much about Christmas.

It was the first of December for fuck sake.

“Ed?” Stede put the box down and got to his feet, frowning a little.

“I think he’s in a state of shock.” Was all Izzy supplied, clearly just to jest Stede.

“I just…” Ed waved his hand around, unsure what to say. “Didn’t remember our house being so glittery.”

Stede stepped over the decorations laid out on the floor to greet Ed in the doorway, leant in to plant a kiss on his lips, and for a moment the decorations didn’t matter because he was home and didn’t want to be anywhere else. He mumbled a hello to Stede, kissed him again, and once Stede had returned to his spot on the floor Ed finally walked into the room, crossed over to Izzy’s chair to lean down and greet him with a kiss too.

“I’d go back out if I were you.” Izzy nodded towards the door once Ed had perched himself on the armrest of his chair, and looked up to see Stede glaring playfully.

“I’d take a lot less time doing it all if you helped.”

Izzy pulled the blanket off of his lap, and reached down to fumble with his prosthetic, and after a moment he took it off, careless as he let it drop to the floor. “Can’t help.”

Ed snorted a laugh, though Stede’s expression was very unamused. “You can’t use that to get out of everything.”

“Yes I can.”

Stede was pouting, and looked over at Ed, gesturing to the decorations around him. “You don’t think this is all pointless, do you?”

“Never said it was pointless.” Izzy mumbled from his side.

Ed let his gaze drift over the decorations again. Nowhere that he had ever lived had ever decorated so heavily for Christmas. When he was a kid his mother would put up a tree and some stockings, but that was it. When he and Izzy had been roommates out of school, they’d never really bothered with much either, just a shitty little plastic tree until they went back to their families for the holidays.

But Ed knew that Stede had led a very different life up until the point that they had met. His life had always been lavish, always had the expenses to celebrate holidays however he wanted. He had no doubt that the decorations over their living room floor were nothing compared to where he had lived with his parents, or with Mary before them — it wasn’t like their house had the room for it all — but it was still more than Ed or Izzy had ever had.

Ed didn’t hate Christmas, not at all. He held fond memories of his mother from that time, secret santas with Izzy (that, granted, he’d had to basically force Izzy to take part in), and more recently, the first Christmas that they had all been together for.

But this would be their first Christmas living together.

“It’s not pointless, mate, no,” Ed shook his head, leant down to lift up a little ornament of an angel into his hands. It was delicate and pretty, and nothing like he and Izzy would’ve owned before they had known and loved Stede. “S’just… y’know, we’ve never really seen the point in decorating the place for Christmas.”

“Really?” Stede had his mouth open, shocked, like Ed had just said something scandalous. “Never? But it’s so- it’s so lovely, Ed, Izzy, it’s such a pretty time of year.”

Ed just gave a little shrug. “The decor and shit has never been so important I guess.”

“Right, then,” Stede nodded, and he had that look on his face — his stubborn look, the look he got when he was about to do something that neither Izzy or Ed would be able to stop once it was in motions. “It’s settled. You two are going to have a real Christmas, done properly.”

His determination made Ed smile, and how could he say no to that? That much passion and stubbornness and- fuck, he just loved Stede so much.

Loved both of them so much.

“Sure thing, love,” Ed nodded, smiled. “But how about we stick a pin in it until tomorrow, yeah? ‘Cause I’m fucked, and just really wanna go to bed-” he moved to stand from the arm of Izzy’s armchair, but he moved in a way that sent shooting pain from his knee and throughout his leg, and immediately cut himself off, gritted out a “fuck” as he stood still.

Izzy had long since zoned out of the previous conversation, had been reading some news articles on his phone like the old man he was, but Ed immediately felt his hand on his back. “Edward?”

“What’s wrong, love?” Stede was insisting, too, and Ed looked up and watched as he scrambled to his feet to get to where Ed was stood.

“Nothing, nothing,” Ed waved them off, inhaled deeply to recompose himself. Sometimes he forgot how much his knee actually did hurt, the pain took the breath from his lungs sometimes. “Just forgot to wear my brace today- ow, what the fuck?” He turned to scowl at Izzy when he had smacked his waist.

“Fucking idiot,” Izzy grumbled, though Ed could see the worry in his eyes. “How much did that brace cost? Too much for you to forget to wear it.”

“Is your knee okay?” Stede was fluttering at his side, frowning. “How bad is it? Do you need any help?”

Ed shook his head. “I’m all good, just a little tender. Will be worse off tomorrow.”

If anything that just made Stede’s frown worse. “Why don’t we go and take a shower so we can get in bed, hm?” He offered, lightly held Ed’s arm with his hands. “I was going to shower anyways, Izzy said he wouldn’t kiss me until I got all of this glitter off of me.”

“I won’t,” came Izzy’s voice whilst Ed laughed. “That shit pisses me off, and now it’s all over our carpet.”

“He’s just being a grump, it’s past his bedtime,” Ed grinned, pretended to ignore the swat he got to his hip as he pulled Stede in with his arm around his shoulders, briefly kissed him on the mouth. “We can shower then sleep,” he told Stede, before he looked back at Izzy. “Will you be joining us, darling?”

Izzy certainly had a point about the glitter, because Ed glanced down at his hands and could see that his skin was dotted with red and golden flecks. He looked back at Izzy with a smile, hands outstretched to cup his face.

“Ed- no-” Izzy leaned as far back in his chair as he could, held his hands up to try and shove Ed’s away. “Edward-”

Ed was far too entertained, and leaned far enough in to cup Izzy’s face despite his protests, laughed against his mouth as he kissed him, before he leaned back to see him.

His beard was glittery.

“Oh don’t you look fabulous, darling.” Stede beamed from beside them.

But Izzy was just glaring at Ed, didn’t look the slightest bit entertained.

“Well, now you have to join us,” Ed beamed, still laughing as he leaned away, tapped Izzy’s cheek once more. And though being leaned down had twinged his knee a little more, the pain was sharper in his joint, it was definitely worth it. “Coming, love?”

“Go fuck yourself.” Izzy grumbled, but despite himself he still leaned down to grab his prosthetic, started putting it back on so he could head to the shower with them.

Stede went upstairs to get the water running and between leaning on Izzy to get to the bathroom whilst his knee was playing up, and listening to the sound of Stede’s humming from the bathroom, he couldn’t have felt more at home.

༶•┈┈୨♡୧┈┈•༶

comments would mean the world <3 requests are open!

[mara-and-its-the-same]

CONGRATS DELLA!!!! IM SO SUPER DUPER PROUD OF YOU <3

🌷 I was wondering if I could have a fluff blurb with Eddie? I struggle with anxiety and things being too much for me, so I was thinking Eddie comforting reader who is overwhelmed with school and life. Maybe a prompt could be, "c'mon...let's take a break and come back to this when we're ready."

This is usually something I do to stop my thoughts from running wild and stressing out...hopefully this is helpful, but please let me know if it's too complicated and I could totally do somethng more simple!!!

congrats again, della!!! 💘🌸🌟

Thank you 🥰🥰😚

It’s not too complicated, it’s lovely 💕(not proof read 😬)

You’ve been looking at this one page for an hour and a half, trying to sit down and get it done, but your brain didn’t seem to get the memo this was work time, not intrusive thoughts time. You think you have to be shaking with all the thoughts running around your body, a discordant orchestra of anxieties in a thunderstorm taking over your mind. You try to tell yourself you’ll be fine, it’s only one grade, your teachers like you well enough, they can be understanding. Not if they don’t like you as much as you thought they did, if this is the one time Mrs. Donner decides against partial cred—

A rapid knock in your window pulled your mind from your thoughts but the smile through the glass calmed you instantly.

“Hey sweetheart, let me in will ya? ‘S freezing out here.” You stood in front of him and pretended to contemplate it for a second, but how could you not give in to that face? It took two big pushes since the ice practically sealed it shut but as soon as there was enough space for him to get through, he ducked under and took your face in both hands. “Mornin’ sweetheart,” he mumbled against your lips and you pulled back, taking him with you since the open window was bringing in all the cold. He slid it shut and locked it then shot you a concerned look.

“Morning? Ed, it’s like 10 o’clock.”

“Baby it's 3:30, why're you still up?" He tossed himself onto your bed, still made from that morning.

"I was just–" you vaguely gestured to your desk, littered with papers. "Doesn't matter, why are you still up? Shouldn't you be home?"

"Wow, that's one way to treat a guest.”

“No–I just mean how did you get here. If it is 3, which I doubt, what are you doing here.”

"Well first of all," he picked up your alarm clock and shook it at you as much as he could with it still attached to the wall, the flashing 3:47 taunting you. "And second, I was coming home from the hideout and thought I'd take a shortcut. Then I saw your light was still on." and I was worried about you.

"Edda," it started as a joke, he always joked with you about how many times you'd call him over then immediately forget what you were going to say, so it always ended up 'Ed-uhhh' Sweetheart, you call me that so much it might as well be my name. "We're nowhere near the hideout."

"I know but I wanted to check up on you. What are you doing up?"

Your essay, fuck– your essay. "Uh, nothing, don't– don't worry about it, I'm fine. Just some school work." You rushed to sit back at your desk and started rereading to where you left off. "Don't uh– You can stay just..." you trailed off and started scribbling again. The final draft was due tomorrow and you've never turned in anything less than an 85, but that was a one off circumstance. You still had 4 hours to get it done, so close to the finish line, just this one transition sentence needs to start cooperating. If only you'd stop procrastinating... well can it really be procrastinating if it's your math set and your science lab, all due the day after but you hardly have any time at all tomorrow and, and, and...

"—Hey, you still in there, baby?" You blinked as you came back to yourself. "Hey, sweetheart." Eddie was crouched next to your seat, a hand on the back of your chair and one over your knee. He must have taken his jacket and boots off while you weren't paying attention.

"Sor–sorry, I'll uh..." you turned back to the page and reached for your pen but he reached across you for your hand before you could.

He shook his head and rubbed his thumb back and forth over the back of your hand. "C'mon," he nodded back towards your bed, "let's take a break and come back to this when we're ready."

"But it's–"

"I know what it is, and I know it's great, and I know we're gonna talk to Kelley tomorrow and figure it out." He stood up now, but leaning over you now. "Yeah?"

"Ok, but–"

"Enough with the buts, no buts. Except yours, in that bed." He smiled on one side at his own lame joke.

"That was so bad." He smiled even bigger when you stood up and let him put his arms around your waist.

"Mmm, but you love it."

"I'm not sure about that, but I love you so that'll just have to suffice."

"Suffice, it does. Your bed, m'lady."

"Thank you, kind sir." He pulled the covers down for you and gave you a look when you didn't get in. "Stay over?"

"Your dad'll kill me."

"So? You're like a cat, you've got 9 lives."

"A cat? How?"

"You're very cat like. A lil stray," you pouted and slid your hand down a curl framing his face, then lightly tugged the end. "My lil stray."

That didn't seem to convince him any further, "Stay, we have warm milk? Please?"

"Quit it with the cat jokes and I will."

"Yay!"

He slid in behind you and nudged your shoulder with his cold nose then a warm kiss. You laid in silence for a few minutes, he stopped his restless movements and when you were certain he was asleep, "meow."

He was not asleep and the way he said your name sounded like a threat to leave he'd never make good on.

"Shhh, shhh, sorry, sorry," you giggled and he laid back down beside you.

"Good night," he said with joking firmness.

"Goodnight....my kitten."

And he purred, this boy purred, freakishly realistic too.

He felt your laugh more than he heard it with the way you were pressed up against him.

[haoaibai]

something happened and im really sad and also happy.

happy chinese new year to all, but YOU GOTTA READ THIS.

for more than a year (3 yrs almost), i’ve done a self diagnosis on myself with spd (sensory processing disorder) and adhd (few others too)

the man took an hour late to arrive but LOL

went to this place and told the man about how i’ve been bullied and what was going on. so i obviously didn’t say i was gay but my mom did bring up how somebody was gay and was bullying me as a gay person (smart man knew i was gay from how I went 😝✌️ along with saying the word “gay” but he didn’t make it obvious until my mom looked away and he smiled and mouthed “yes good im proud for you”).

since i get extremely uncomfortable when they kept talking about my ASD so then i felt like crying cause yk mental health issues + illnesses, etc shit being exposed and almost cried (they never knew bc i never made it obvious but my eyes watered under my hoodie), and yk I felt really really sad than my mood was today.

THEN THE BIG NEWS CAME.

since you never knew i was neurodivergent, i’m gonna let you know.

i didn’t know HALF of what he said because he spoke fast but

i managed to catch half (idk if half atp cause he got LOADS of diagnosis for me but it was too much and he spoke really really fast)

HE WAS FRIENDLY BUT

i FUCKING KNEW. that the spd was right. I WASNT SURE BUT HE SAID I HAVE IT. YESSS A REAL DIAGNOSIS.

he said im diagnosed with asd, adhd, spd (sensory processing disorder), tics (not like tourettes but he did say something WILL cause me to tic but it’s only anxiety that will cause it a few times but if it gets worse, i must tell him) + my anxiety will cause me to tic (like shivering and form different tics but its not like tourettes that people ACTUALLY have).

he also said my auditory sensory processing disorder as well (+ with sensory processing too), he said i had something sensitivity (idk what it was because he spoke REALLY fast) but i think he said sensory or sensitivity disorder (if you knew what it’s called, PLEASE lemme know).

stuttering disorder + high functioning on asd + low functioning on adhd (lemme know if functioning is out of date or not) and some other stuff.

BUT I GOT AN OFFICIAL DIAGNOSIS GUYSSSSS

i’ve tried to find the “congratulations on the neurodivergency cake” but I found this.

congratulations to me on my further neurodivergent diagnosis :))