#this post is about the dead boy detectives fic im working on

[packleaderbriggan]

Don't you just love when you finish your first draft, go back to edit, and realize you overlooked a massive plot hole

Like, I thought I was almost done, why does this document now have an additional TWENTY FUCKING PAGES OF DIALOG AND DETAILS AND A COMPLETELY DIFFERENT STORYLINE

[a-whole-lot-of-things]

i love dead boy detectives to death, and hope with all my being that we can Somehow pull off getting it back (through netflix or otherwise)

but honestly if we cant? if we get stuck at where we are now forever? i honestly think ill miss the potential s2 soundtrack the most

[evilbookworm]

Introduction Post

Hi!!! Im a minor!

‼️I TAKE FIC REQUESTS. JUST DROP THEM IN MY ASK BOX! If im not in the fandom or up to the idea, it most likely won’t be answered‼️

⁉️I also take edit requests! Same rules apply⁉️

I go by he/him pronouns and I’m trans (ftm) and gay.

You can call me by my blog name! Or Rowan!!

Profile pic is credit to FINN <3

Here are a list of fandoms I’m in:

Stranger Things

It (2017)

The Goldfinch

PJO

Dead Poets Society

Dead Boy Detectives

Heartstopper

Young Royals

Scream (1996)

and more I can’t remember lol

Avid byler shipper! Also boreo, reddie, and stenbrough my children.

I’m a writer, you can find my ao3 here

Also an artist, but still working on my art style, so I’ll make a blog for it eventually!

Alt blogs:

@finnwolfhard-givesme-genderenvy - you can probably assume what that’s about 😭

@rowan-writes-a-little-too-much is my fic/writing side blog! Go give that one a follow if you enjoy me ranting about fics and writing lol

Other socials:

Discord: ev1lbookworm

Just friend request me and lmk it’s you!

Pinterest: evilbookworm08

Follow me and lmk it’s you so you can see my boards!

So yeah, anyways thanks for reading!

Stanley Uris my love

Original fanart for it here

[avorthuades]

INTRO BC MINE GOT LOST IN THE VOID

☆ Hi, I'm avor!!

☆they/he :)

☆ Minor

☆ Interests: pjo, marauders, next gen

☆ more minor interests (basically stuff that I know but don't interact with content with) stranger things, dead boy detectives, hamilton, if we were villans, kotlc, drarry

about me:

☆enfp

☆kins james and sirius mostly

☆but also peter and pandora as a little side kins

☆my favourite animal is a lemur

☆i write and read mostly!!

☆british

☆half french with shit grammar

☆favourite ships: jegulus, wolfstar, drarry, scorbus, byler, emmary,

☆my favourite colour is green

☆I'm wonky genderfluid (genderfluid but I only use they or he pronouns and only feel masculine or non binary)

☆asexual

☆my girlfriend is @aelia-posts and i love her very much :)

more admin-y stuff

☆I have a few tags! they are as follows:

☆#avo yaps about stuff - my main tag. I use it for when I'm talking about my interests

☆#probably avor - reasonably new! for everything i post.

☆#avo loves aella - my tag for when I'm talking about aella because im quite gay and sometimes i like to yap with her okay

☆#avor writes sometimes - I write. sometimes.

☆#avor shitposts - random stuff I like to post about when I get bored

☆my ao3 - goldplant2x9

avor writes - what I've written / am writing

☆these are the best days of our lives - jegulus, wolfstar, rosekiller, dorlene. 39k, completed. summer camp au.

https://archiveofourown.org/works/56153542

☆at the end of it all - emmary, dorlene, hestia x benji, wolfstar, jily, xenopanda. in progress! 2 chapters so far. final year of hogwarys & war fic focused around emmeline and mary.

https://archiveofourown.org/works/63306196

☆just let me be (close to you). wolfstar, rosekiller, jegulus, dorlene,emmary. in progress - 4 chapters so far. texting fic! sirius and barty fake date in order to convince remus and evan to date them. it... doesn't go well.

https://archiveofourown.org/works/60127612

[paraphwrites]

2024 WRITING REVIEW

so apparently @genevievefangirl tagged me in this like a week ago and i wrote it, put it in drafts, then promptly forgot about it. sorry for the delay bestie sob

number of stories posted to ao3: 8

word count posted for last year: 180,918 (starting April)

fandoms i wrote for: dead boy detectives, glee

pairings: payneland, klaine

stories with the most kudos, bookmarks and comment threads: the manuscript of real people which is unsurprising given its five times longer than even my second longest work. it's not a fair fight. the oneshots were never gonna stand a chance

work i’m most proud of (and why): lemonade & sunrises, baby! i don't have a banger reason as to why - something about it just really speaks to my soul on a deep and personal level. i just really like it

work i’m least proud of (and why): probably dandelion days seeing as i have yet to finish it despite saying like 30 times that i would. something about it just doesn't really speak to me? it was my second fic i ever started writing, so i was still figuring out what makes me buzz, and it just turned out not to be that

share or describe a favorite review you received: (image: comment by newleavesinspiring on "lemonade & sunrises": "Not for nothing but I think this piece had fundamentally changed my brain")

I don't know something about that really stuck w me

a time when writing was really, really hard: september-november was a bit hard for me, because i was going through some really difficult personal issues then, so writing also in turn became a bit more difficult. doing anything at all was difficult tho lol so what can you do

a scene or character you wrote that surprised you: chris from manuscript. i didn't really mean for him to show up but people in the comments LATCHED onto him to the point that like i feel like i should find a way to bring him back

a favorite excerpt of your writing:

"Charles is infinitely more than lovely" is a line which has always stuck out to me. it's from this excerpt, chapter 13 of manuscript

how did you grow as a writer last year: i've gotten a lot more consistent about writing regularly. i figured out How To Write Fanfiction as well, which was cool

who was your greatest positive influence this year as a writer (could be another writer, beta, cheerleader, etc.) i gotta say, @professional-lurker-42 has been the most incredible cheerleader throughout my manuscript writing journey, and has grown into be just one of the most amazing friends.

anything from your real life show up in your writing last year: god when doesn't it lol. but honestly it's not cathartic or really anything at all, it's just genuine. even if the experiences can be different, the emotions are very real.

i will say, though, that specifically as edwin grappled with his sexuality throughout manuscript, reading the comments people wrote was incredibly cathartic. like middle school me was fundamentally healed by hearing strangers on the internet say that this is not the thing that will ruin his life and it will be okay

any new wisdom you can share with other writers: you can always do better. you could always fix something and make it better and revise more and just like you're never going to get it to perfect. so, and i say this with so much love, get over yourself and finish it. you're not GOING to make it perfect so stop trying to make it perfect and instead make it yours and make it real

any projects you’re looking to starting (or finishing) this year? i'll be finishing manuscript in 2025, probably vibing through a lot of we'll carry on as well. i also have a few other ideas in the works, which, shortly before i finish manuscript will commence, to "take over" in a way. hyped for those as well!

tagging: @dead-but-still-sarcastic if you havent done it yet?? otherwise anyone who sees this please do it!! im kind of late to it lol

[spraypaintstainonawhitewall]

✨INTRO POST ✨

Hey yall the name's Icarus (or Saturn or Zero im not very particular), I use any pronouns, if im using any particular pronouns on some days i make a post abt it

I am in wayy too many fandoms and I won't create separate blogs for all of them. enjoy.

basic dni if youre homophobic, transphobic, sexist, ableist, r-slur users (its not "reclamation". stop.), racist, zionist, ai users and promoters or a creep just dont come near me. this is 100% not a space for you. also dni if you ship waycest, venomcest, kaylor. and dni if you hate any of my interests. im not gonna bother with you so dont waste your energy.

also 100% dnf if youre under or are thirteen (though i think that kinda goes without saying) and maybe think twice before following if youre under 15 cuz i do occasionally rb sex related stuff- nothing too much but rather safe than sorry

trigger happy with the block button

DMs: send me an ask if you legit wanna talk (if we aren't already moots)

Asks: always open

tags/tag games: please

also if I don't answer your asks or if you tagged me in anything and i havent done anything about it it's nothing against you I'm either just thinking of a good response or I forgot that i didnt respond to it yet. its a 50/50 chance.

tagging system: its a work in progress but if im yapping i tag it with #hey im talkin here, asks with #asks (ill come up with something better later), rants about college on #on campus chronicles and anything else appropriately

theres also #textverse which is just a silly little thing where i edit texts i find on pinterest to different characters (most probably from danger days)

my ao3 is @/downtown_fangirl please go read my fics i spend a lot of time on them (you can find me talking about them and the lore on here on #fic talks) (more or less)

my ig is @/iliketosuffertwice.creatively but im rarely ever active on there

! ! IN THE FACE OF EXTERMINATION SAY FUCK YOU ! !

anyways, fandom rundown list (note that this is not a spoiler free blog for any of these):

and i do blog about all of these. not consistently but yeah. if you have a problem with any of it block the tag or gtfo.

Music: My Chemical Romance, Fall Out Boy, Taylor Swift, Conan Gray, Olivia Rodrigo, Chappell Roan, Green Day, Pierce the Veil, Billie Eilish, The Neighborhood, Mad Tsai, Em Beihold, Cigarettes After Sex, Panic! at the Disco (technically just Fever), Sabrina Carpenter, Daisy Grenade

Books/Shows: Percy Jackson, Shadowhunters, Grishaverse, The Umbrella Academy, Heartstopper, Merlin, Young Royals, Good Omens, All for the game, Hunger Games, AGGGTM, Dead Boy Detectives, Lockwood and Co., Arcane, I am not okay with this, probably more but i cant think. you'll know. Misc: the wonderful album that is Danger Days: The True Lives of the Fabulous Killjoys by My Chemical Romance and the comics by Gerard Way (note I have not read Nat Am). I love this concept album and these funky little desert gays with all my heart. talk to me about them any time (please <3)

[neitherthehoneynorthebee]

hello, i just found your post about sending requests for fics (dbda). It's probably the cancellation news which is making me furious and angsty so can i please request an angst with a happy ending fic. I have some vague ideas about it like some scene where Charles and Edwin are about to kiss but Edwin pulls away, starts chanting a Aramaic or Latin or whatever spell because he realizes that the person in front of him wasn't Charles but rather the culprit for their case who reels people in using their deepest desire. Edwin says something along the lines of "the real Charles wouldn't want to or doesn't want me like that" all while the real Charles is watching everything unfold and later they talk and the hurt/comfort and probably getting together?? I know this is too specific and like im totally projecting onto Edwin but if you find this interesting and feel like writing it, it'd be amazing. No pressure of course, only if you want to. Thanks. Have a good day!

Hi! I'm sorry this is ridiculously late, but here it is!!! I was unable to gift it to your account unfortunately but I mentioned your request in the notes. Thanks for the prompt! Have a good day :)

[lesbicosmos]

20 Questions for Fic Writers!!

saw @celestialcrowley did this and it looked fun!! im pausing writing my current WIP for this

1. how many works do you have on ao3?

as of right now, 27 but i have another 3 currently in the works (dead boy detectives has turned my brain into fanfic soup and i love it)

2. what's your total ao3 word count?

89,795 (what the fuck how did i do that)

3. what fandoms do you write for?

currently only working on dead boy detectives ones but ive also written dead poets society, merlin, good omens, doctor who and supergirl

4. top 5 by kudos?

the great petname debacle of '24 (dead boy detectives) - 398

it feels real to me now, it felt real to me then (dead boy detectives) - 354

hope that you're good to me, baby (supergirl) - 292

'cause it was always you, alright (dead boy detectives) - 228

we should just kiss like real people do (good omens) - 166

5. do you respond to comments?

yes!! i try to respond to all of them because they're so good, there's no better feeling than an ao3 comment notification <33

6. what is the fic you wrote with the angstiest ending?

probably either the last one i wrote, where did i go wrong? i lost a friend (dead boy detectives, post-canon) or no grave can hold my body down (a really niche dead poets society / afterlove au) but neither of them are Angsty, i don't write a lot of angst lmao

7. what is the fic you wrote with the happiest ending?

most of my others lmao, currently id say it feels real to me now, it felt real to me then but that's just because it's a recent one that i remember writing the ending of

8. do you get hate on fics?

i don't think i ever have

9. do you write smut?

no, i tried once when i wrote my supergirl fic but it was shit so i scrapped that part 😭

10. craziest crossover?

i guess the dead poets / afterlove one but it's also my Only crossover soooo

i tend to think about crossovers more than i write them lol, like me and @latin-8-o-clock-my-room had a whole conversation the other day about a potential dead boy detectives / six of crows crossover which was fun

11. have you ever had a fic stolen?

nope

12. have you ever had a fic translated?

no but i think that would be so cool, i love that it's a thing that happens to make fics more accessible to people

13. have you ever co-written a fic before?

not exactly co-written but the dialogue in one of my merlin fics was based off a conversation me and a friend had late at night once where i swear we got possessed by merlin and arthur

so if that counts then yeah i guess? but i was the one who wrote it up so semi-cowritten ig

14. all time favourite ship

no ♥️

i simply cannot choose an all time favourite, current fav is definitely charles and edwin from dead boy detectives though

15. what's a WIP you want to finish but don't think you ever will?

there was a merlin one i started that i still love the idea of so much, everything you've done...i know now, where arthur relives his and merlin's past while in avalon so he saw everything merlin had done for him, but idk if ill get around to finishing it :/

16. what are your writing strengths?

dialogue and descriptions of emotions, and fluff

17. what are your writing weaknesses?

i feel like i can't write a detailed kiss scene to save my life

also descriptions of actions

18. thoughts on dialogue in another language?

confusing question, idk. if it fits the plot it's fine ig but if it's random...why? i have no idea how to answer this

19. first fandom you wrote for

discounting the harry potter fics i wrote when i was like 11 because no one wants to see that, i think the first main fic i wrote was for IT, the horror movie 😭

20. favourite fic you've written so far?

currently probably 'cause it was always you, alright because i had so much fun writing it and people seem to be liking it

not gonna tag anyone specific but this was rly fun lol

[neil-perrys-suicidal-tendencies]

INTRO POST <3

last updated - 4/5/25 (added a 'posts I'm proud of' section) fic recs | my fic

Pronouns may change frequently, if confused I prefer with they.

twinning theme+pfp with my brother @florenceandthejellybean

BASICS- ABOUT ME: 🪶I'm Lisa Alex Avenir (love nicknames, especially Lise, Liz, Alex or Al. Be creative, I don't mind). If it stars with L or A I'm prolly chill with it. All creative liberties with my name.) 🪶I'm an asexual genderqueer lesbian and I use they/she pronouns (prefer they). 🪶I'm Indian and a minor. Adults are chill but keep the latter part in mind. 🪶I'm also bilingual/multilingual depending on how loose your definition is.

I love receiving asks even though I may take some time to answer them sometimes. I love talking to people here but only dm me we are mutuals :) my old intro post because I'm emotionally attached to it DNI- queerphobes, sexists, racists, trump supporters, terfs, the basics - no assholes. If something is off - I will block you.

FANDOMS: This list will keep on changing- Most Active in: Dead Poets Society, BBC Sherlock, My Chemical Romance, Gravity Falls, Dead Boy Detectives Occasionally post: A Little Life, House Md, Chappell Roan, Derry Girls, Bunny I also reblog a lot of silly stuff, lgbtquia+ stuff, political stuff and sometimes things concerning my mental health so take that as a tw .

POSTS I'M PROUD OF

DPS POSTS Silly Ones- bitches be like, all hot girls, how Neil asked the poets, inpatient brown eyes, comfort movie, my expression when, Nah bro, funko Neil, anderperry kiss, anderperry wedding, dummy, my headcannons, meeks keating, no one understands, Ones that make death threats acceptable- weeping in the shower, excuse me Neil Perry, Neil is laughing, Todd is going to be okay, Todd Anderson is okay, Imagine being woken up, Analysis- Scenes with Keating, suicide scene, Lyrics- evermore, gazal pt 1, pt2, pt3

BBC SHERLOCK season 1, 2, 3 part 1, 3 part 2

QUEER Asexual characters, drew the ace flag, toxic codependent homosexual friendship, sapphic yearning gender binary, mama

RANDOM? that one wilson post, gerard way-fucking faggot, INTERACT Asians vs Europeans - the Sun

LINKS SIDE BLOGS: @i-think-im-breaking-down-again - more personal blog @cappuccino-circa-capillaries -hopecore posts @a-bitch-can-write-poetry - poetry and web weaving reblogs, will post my original work if I ever get the courage @honestly-im-honest- silly stuff @edwinpayneshomosexualtendencies - dbda side blog MEDIA: Pinterest | Spotify | Storygraph | stats.fm | letterboxd | serialzd | TAGS: #yapping the days away - yaps #ficposting - talking about my fic #my art - my art #rewatching bbc sherlock - block this if you can, this is me experiencing a psychological breakdown #asksss, #moot asks, #anon asks - asks related stuff If you send asks often, I probably have a special tag just for you #affirmations - hopecore posts #normal thoughts, #unfortunately that's me - unhealthy thoughts #silly stuff, #hellsite, #hellsite heritage - tumblr being silly #politically correct opinions - anything which i deem is correct and debated

INTERESTS- MUSIC: My music taste is that of a straight white teenage girl, a cottagecore lesbian, her emo girlfriend and an Indian dad. 🪶Genre - Indie, Indie pop, Rock, Alt-Indie, Basic white girl pop, Pop-rock, Pop-punk, Folk, Old Bollywood, Male manipulator, Female Manipulator, Lesbian Manipulator, ghazal, anything that slaps 🪶Artists - Sufjan Stevens , Ricky Montgomery, Flower Face, Lana Del Rey, Taylor Swift, Chappell Roan, Hozier, Phoebe Bridgers, Girl in Red, Clario, Conan Gray, Hank Green, Sabrina Carpenter, Hayley Williams, Joji, Indila, Adele. Kishore Kumar, Lata Mangeshkar, Jagjit Singh, Muhammad Rafi, Asha Bhosle etc etc 🪶Bands - Florence and the Machine, Hole, My Chemical Romance, Paramore, Cage The Elephant, Beach House, The Jayhawks, Sir Chloe, The Neighborhood, Fun Guns, Wallows, Arctic Monkeys, Chase Atlantic, Radiohead. 🪶Albums(favourites) - Carrie and Lowell, A Beginner's mind, Illinois, Javelin, The Age of Adz, evermore, folklore, Midnights, The Black Parade, Danger Days, Three Cheers for Sweet Revenge, Emails I can't send frwd:, Short and Sweet, Montgomery Ricky, Hozier, Depression Cherry, Bloom, Lungs, Ceremonials, How Big How Blue How beautiful, Superache, Kid Krow, Riot!, AM, Party Flavors, I am the Dog, Stranger in The Alps, Punisher, Rainy Day Music, Petals for Armour, The Rise and Fall of a Midwest Princess, Social Cues, Tell me I'm Pretty, Melophobia, Live through this, Ultraviolence, Born to Die(The Paradise Edition), Nothing Happens, Baby Teeth, Fever Dreams, The Shark in your Water, Lilt, Get up and Move by Fun Guns, Sour

BOOKS- 🪶Genre - Dark, War pieces, Dystopias, Young Adult, Depressing, Dark Academia, Classics, Psychological Thriller. 🪶Ride or Die - The Book Thief, The Perks Of Being a Wallflower, MAUS, Paper Towns, Looking for Alaska, All the Bright Places, The Midnight Library, The Handmaid's Tale, The Diary of a Young Girl, A Little Life, The Boy In The Stripped Pajamas, Circe, Before the coffee gets cold, Sharp Objects, The Martian, The DaVinci Code, Bunny, The Emperor of All Maladies, Turtles all the way down, And Then There Were None, The Picture of Dorian Grey, The Catcher in The Rye, No Longer Human, Grandpa's Great Escape, Wild Bird, The Giver. 🪶Honorable Mentions from my TBR - If We Were Villains, The Secret History, 1984, To Kill A Mockingbird, Six Of Crows, Lord of the Flies, Piranesi, Lessons in Chemistry, Crime and Punishment, How it Feels to Float, Orbiting Jupiter, Normal People, Fahrenheit 451, The Myth of Sisyphus, Lessons in Chemistry, Slaughterhouse-five, Dark Matter. 🪶Poets - Sylvia Plath, Emily Dickinson, William Wordsworth. Sappho,

MOVIES- Dead Poets Society, Good Will Hunting, Lady Bird, Whiplash, Booksmart, Black Swan, Spiderman: Into the Spider-Verse, Forrest Gump, Duck Duck Goose SERIES- BBC Sherlock, Orange Is The New Black, HBO's Chernobyl (This was my 1st hyperfixation and it lasted for more than 3 years. At its prime I knew how to run several types of reactors and was known for nuclear energy. I almost got outed coz of his ha) Brooklyn99, Dead Boy Detectives, Heartstopper, Derry Girls, Modern Family, Just Add Magic, House md?, Lockwood and Co., Adolescence.

FACTS- 🪶Only Child 🪶I love any form of Noodles Soup 🪶I have a huge crush on Maya Hawke 🪶I have a huge crush on short hair Ruby Cruz 🪶I love biology and anatomy 🪶I need psychological help /srs 🪶I have brown ass basic eyes 🪶My vocabulary might be good but I can't spell for shit. 🪶I'm touch starved but touch aversed. Yes, we exist. 🪶I'm a nerd fighter 🪶I love dissecting song lyrics 🪶My aesthetic is dark academia, witchcore and sickly victorian child dying of the plague core. aka I like to dress like a privilaged boarding school boy. 🪶I am a hyper-organized clean freak (it get crippling) 🪶I have multiple BFRBs since childhood. 🪶I have these sneeze attacks on a daily basis where I sneeze like 15 times over the course of 3 minutes 🪶 My 2025 resolution is to count my sneezes and my body has abruptly stopped sneezes since Jan 1st. HOBBIES- 🪶Reading 🪶Writing poetry or songs 🪶Listening to Music 🪶The Universe 🪶Literature 🪶making little collages on PowerPoint

MOOTS APPRICIATION!!!! @lv3buzzz, @noctilucaa(even in deactivation, star will be my wife), @florenceandthejellybean(my brother) @wilsons-three-legged-siamese, @yourfavvgal, @1mlostnow, @arrr-im-a-dead-poet, @perksofbeingpoet, @mighthavebeenmurder, @take-me-to-the-rooftop15, @poetsinnyc, @scrunchybugzzz, @deadcrowcalling, @finneyneilperrykisser @pingunaa, @xxcherryberriezxx @clodyghost, @cerulean-cries, @glitteredbubbles (text me if you would like your name to be removed <3333 )

-🪶

[cannibalisticcorpse]

i'm mercury/george

this blog is 18+ only

merc's guide to tagging:

#floozy alert is my hal jordan tag

#my pregnant wife is my frank castle tag

#drool boy is my charles rowland tag

#dwt is dreamwastaken #dsmp is dream smp #dnf is dreamnotfound #gnf is georgenotfound

#joker mush are posts that made me so mad i wanted to kill someone

#this made me think of sage are posts that made me think of my wife @voiid-vagabond

#m![name] is my system tag. the name is whichever headmate it was posted/reblogged by or about (m!tim and m!sap are probably the most active)

#roommates fandom are posts about my (old) roommates

#pwning poetry are my original poems

#myrc art is my art tag

#sgs is survivor's guilt series, a heavy angst no capes batfam au #maple syrup fic is jason's story that started it #cocaine jesus fic is tim's story im working on now #sugar bones is dick's story im working on during breaks from tim's

#my writing is my writing tag

this blog is 18+ only

my ao3 cannibalisticCorpse

my dead boy detectives NSFW doodle collection

my favorite works of mine:

maple syrup - E, jayroy, 127k words, road trip, trauma recovery, coming of age, romance

i wish it was summer - E, scott summers/warren worthington iii, 13k words, no powers/college au, hanahaki au, romance

i don't know who i used to be - M, scott summers/logan howlett/warren worthington iii, 20k words, 1850s period piece, mail order bride, romance

my spine is coming out my mouth - M, payneland, 2k words, everyone is alive/college au, hanahaki au, angst

i want to break these bones 'til they're better - E, payneland, 5.6k words, pwp, wrestling, blood kink, frottage & porn with feelings

NO ONES TOUCHED ME THERE IN A DAMN HOT MINUTE - E, payneland, 7.9k words, trauma aftermath, angst, porn with plot

you already have everything you need - E, rexstrevri, 4k words, pwp, tender sex, only one bed, multiple positions

am i good (enough for you)? - E, payneland, 3k words, pwp, sex pollen, puppy play, spit, crying, size kink/small dick

holding hands forever - E, payneland, 2.9k words, pwp, age play, human AU, stuffed animals, erectile dysfunction, small dick

my baby likes that i look confused all the time - E, rexstrevri, 3.8k words, pwp, crossdressing, sexuality realization, multiple positions, drool, crying, first time, size difference/small dick

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[loyally-unfaithful]

—; but “sentimental boy” is my nom de plume

word count: 1916

pairing: connor/gn!reader

genre: slight fluff; hurt no comfort

summary: it has been a year after the android revolution. humans and android alike settled down, an olive branch was offered as a sign of reconciliation. with newfound peace came along newfound love, and many open roads to choose from. this was no different for the rk800—connor. surprisingly or unsurprisingly, he decided to continue working at the dpd, this time as a bonafide detective. but he has also accepted the thrilling uncertainty of life that deviancy has brought; the same strings that brought his lover in his life.the same ones he hated and cursed, the same fates who ripped it all away.

a/n: everytime i convince myself i came out of my dbh hyperfixation i just look at connor and i become lovesick again.

gosh i know i should be finishing my other fic or work on the prologue script for my vn, but,,,,,,, i just had a sudden hankering for connor angst,,,,

written during a sleep deprivation induced moment of epiphany,,,,, (purple prose cuz im extra af uwu)

I’ve never written angst before so i’d love to hear your thoughts on it

maybe if you asked him one year ago whether he’d consider returning someone’s feelings, romantic feelings, he’d reply to you with a placid smile and a polite « i’m sorry, i wasn’t programmed to reciprocate romantic interest. ». he remembered that he’d sneer at them internally. now thinking about it, long before he questioned his obedience towards her, he already showed signs of deviancy.

you did what you were designed to do.

memories from his past would still torment him erratically, doubts would resurface on particularly dark days. but you were the light that cut through that haze. this wasn’t a “fake deviancy”. it couldn’t have been. not when he is holding your body so close to his, warmth radiating off of each other, two heartbeats—similar, but different—thrumming together. all the softly whispered and adoringly announced « i love you »’s; all the quick and coveted pecks and all the feverish and passionate kisses. no, he was alive, he was sure of it—alive and absolutely enamoured by you. all semblance of doubt ebbed away when you entered his life.

whenever he’s around you, he feels more alive: you make him feel everything, all the little precious things. tenderness and adoration when he shares tranquil mornings with you. he feels more alive when he’s with you, all the little habits and routines too endearing: the sweet post-it notes scattered over your shared flat; scribbled upon it are encouraging words or sweet nothings. conflicting work schedules meant that moments spent together were scarce, but that made them even more valuable and coveted. captivation, was another emotion that he felt around you. your mannerism, your dreams and interests, your physical attributes and quality of voice. logically speaking, you were just another human, insignificant in the grand scheme of things. you’d live and then one day, you’d die. as if you never really existed. but he wasn’t being logical. how could he be? when you were right there in front of him? you made him irrational, and he found that new aspect in life thrilling. confusing at first, but exciting. he was eternally grateful that you let him experience all these beautiful emotions with you. he was grateful that you allowed him in your short journey that you called life.

he was happy, absolutely content, with his shared life with you. you were both in perfect places in your respective lives: you both had a stable job, loving family backing you up, and a fulfilling love life. what seemed to be a mismatched couple at first turned to be 2 pieces of the same puzzle finally finding their place. life for the both of you couldn’t be better.

but along with the many exquisite moment that your romantic endeavours brought you, the android didn’t only taste the sweet delicacies of life; no matter how idyllic a moment may be, there were times when he had to taste the astringent and sour desserts life offered.

anger. that was an emotion that he felt. but that’s not accurate, no… it was frustration and shock and betrayal, all the unsavoury feelings in the world. perhaps it was due to his inexperience, maybe his lack of exposure to these negative sentiments, that caused him to snap the way he did. to hurt you the way he did. but it happened and there was no turning back the clock.

no matter how much he begged and cried for it.

he was proud that you got the job offer in canada, he really was. and he, like any other caring boyfriend would, offered to accompany you there, an offer which you gladly accepted. that was the plan. but plans were difficult to follow. crime waits for no man, working for the law meant that connor must always be available for duty. no excuses, he was an android. but connor wasn’t just a simple android detective, no, he had a much more important role: he was the link, the messenger, between jericho and the police force. he was the crucial communication between the two forces. so when jericho contacted him about threats of anti-android attacks, he had to make an appearance at their base. the meeting coincided with the day you were meant to travel to canada. it was a simple trip really. it only took a few hours by train, stay in canada for 2 days (it was the weekend), and then return back to detroit, probably arriving in the late afternoons to their home.

but you were looking forwards to traveling with your wonderful partner after « [we] spent so much time apart ». the day he told you the urgent change of plans, connor was tired, overwhelmed. you were frustrated and expectant. a fight was bound to have erupted. accusatory statements, along the lines of: « you don’t actually care about me! it’s all about work and work and work! » and « i can’t believe how selfish you’re being right now! » in between shouting and yelling and frustration and anger and contempt–

you both went to bed exhausted but spiteful, still not forgiving each other. in hindsight, he felt so utterly pathetic, so unbelievably childish, for being that cruel, and uncaring. he didn’t want to be like him again. so many glares and insults were thrown at each other, tears threatened to spill, LED flashed and shone a true red, doors were slammed. he felt awful, plain and simple. you both lied in the same bed, under the same cover. so close yet so excruciatingly far apart. back facing the other’s, no one said a word.

you woke up before him. bitter and unhappy. no morning kisses, no whispered « i love you » to wake your other half. you wordlessly got yourself ready, grabbed your bag and quietly snuck out. no post it notes were left. no sweet promises or encouraging words. you could do this work trip without him. you were independent. you didn’t need a tin can to chaperone you everywhere. so you left. plain and simple. gone. since you woke up and left earlier than planned, you boarded an earlier train. how lovely and convenient. the carriages were mostly filled with androids. perhaps they were trying to immigrate to canada like the others. who knows. you paid no mind and absentmindedly scrolled through your phone, obsessively checking your messages to see if connor realised. to see if he apologised. because frankly, at that point you were tired of being mad and just wanted to spend the day in his arms. but prideful and petty as you were, you weren’t willing to apologise and admit your mistakes first.

connor roused from stasis a few moments afterward, less bitter and more regretful. he wished to right his wrongs but the normally warm presence beside him was not there. his system was slowly booting back up when his audio sensor picked up an incessant ringing from the living room. he jolted up and rushed out to pick up the ringing phone call and waited for the other side to speak up.

the room was so utterly quiet, a silence so suffocating engulfed the room, that you could hear a pin drop. the voice on the other side asked whether this was indeed your house and that he was indeed connor anderson. he swallowed dryly and answered with a soft, « yes ». running a quick check in his database, he matches the caller’s voice with a certain nathaniel edwards. first responder. he allowed his HUD to display the news. if androids could get pale, have all their blood drain from their faces, his would have certainly done so. he stood, rigid and motionless, consumed by shock and horror.

the news and the first responder’s words blended into one as he gripped the phone tighter: « this morning, at 7:48 am the train from detroit to toronto was caught in a devastating turn of events: the train soon caught in fire and exploded as it made its way over the border. it has been confirmed that there has been 0 survivors. it is unclear whether this was an unfortunate accident or the result of anti-android terrorism. »

the other person’s voice poured through the speaker but he wasn’t listening. he stared blankly in front of him. no way, he thought, it couldn’t have been… the only sign that the android was registering the other man’s input was the now constant red LED.

« sir? sir. i’m sorry to bring this— – no, this isn’t right… you must have the wrong number, he interrupted. there were probably others with your name… maybe they were mistaken... – sir that’s not possible, w— – you must have gotten the wrong house… not… it-it couldn’t have been…» but he knew how improbable it was that they got the wrong number. he was built to be logical, to believe statistics. the statistics told him you were dead. long gone. he hoped and prayed that you stayed back, didn’t get on the earlier train. the statistics told him you did.

he choked out a response, quiet and defeated. you were gone. he’d never get to see you again. « i… i’m sorry… i-i don’t understand… – we tried our best to find them sir, but… the fire was too severe… if we gain any new developm— – you didn’t save them. »

still in a daze, he must have hung up on the poor man and unceremoniously dropped the phone. its clatter the only sound in this deafening silence. the reality of it all comes crashing through and he collapsed, ugly sobs escaping him as the denial faded away to make way for the pure and unfiltered grief. he felt lost. for the first time in a long while since amanda he felt so utterly and completely lost. no more shining beacon during his dark and stormy nights. no more valued affection and coveted kisses. no more notes and no more smile to come home to.

he laughed bitterly, devoid of any humour. it was funny, just how cruel the fates were: made human life so fleeting. lachesisonly gave them such a short eternity. and when he thought you both found your missing halves, bound to another by an invisible string, atropos cuts it. a small snippet that is so easily ripped away from you. he belonged with you, he felt at peace with you. he was able to be what he struggled to be for the majority of his miserable and artificial existence. with you, he was able to be happy.

but now he’ll have to get used to not coming home to a warm embrace. he’ll have to get used to going into stasis alone, in the cold bed. he’ll have to get used to his aching heart being greeted by an empty house. every cold and lonely  nights. it’s ridiculous how human he felt because of you. and he was both thankful and spiteful for it.

sadness and bitter regret ripped through him when he remembered that he didn’t  share goodbyes before he left. he remembered how he couldn’t have apologised to you and tenderly held you. he regretted not being able to tell you how much he loved you and how much you meant to him for the last time. ra9 only knows the things he’d do and the things he’d sacrifice, just to have you in his arms again.

instead he was faced with the bitter reminder that the last thing he’s ever said to you, your last memory of him, was a contemptuous and scornful « i wished i never met you ».

like my work? consider buying me a coffee // checking out my masterlist | links can be found on my desc

[charmspoint]

37 for the fic writer questions!

Ask meme here

37. Talk about your current wips

This is great I was thinking of listing out everything im working on these days anyway n now i get an excuse. For quite a few of these I cant talk about them actually cuz they are event stuff but imma list em anyway.

(This got long so im putting it under keep reading)

Lets! Categorize!

A) Ready to post!

Here we have my ShinKami bb fic: No Escape (coming out tomorrow) and my DabiHawks bb fic: Red string of death (coming out sunday) - obvs cant say much until they are posted, lets just say that for shinkami we are gettin some horror and dabihawks gets double banger of soulmate au x reincarnation au but like angsty

B) Currently in editing

Pieces for: DabiHawks metamorphos zine, LOV found family zine and villain/vigilante deku zine - since they are zines i feel like its a big no no to talk about them so we goin down

C) Currently writing

A secret santa piece and a piece for todobaku bb - one of these is actually cute couple things and the other is be dumping magic and horror on to a shipping fic again i obviously have a thing for that the more i think about these

D) Currently planing

Shinsou bigbang! (Do NOT judge me for how many events im in) anyway im super looking forward to this i feel like i have such a great idea n mmm we arent even to partnering up yet so i zip

DabiHawks secret admierer au - something i can talk about :0. This was one of my pitches for the metamorphos au n i got attached. The basic premise is: no powers high school au, local bad boy band member Touya is pining hard after straight A good boy Keigo and in atempt to confess his feelings he leaves a love song in his locker. The problem? Dabi is super fucking edgy and so is his song and upon reading it Keigo is 100% Dabi wants him dead. Shennaniganse ensue. LOV is there giving Dabi increasingly bad love advice, Rumi is there mostly to laugh her ass of and then do dramatic reading of the song, im gonna write actual songs for it!!! Anyway just lil slice of life school comedy, im not always about horror and angst belive it or not. Im looking forward to this one it should be fun!

All the beautiful things we are (All the dangerous things we will become) - another chuuya gen fic!! This one featuring Kouyou (n maaaaaybe Kyouka) in some good ol sibling bonding. Set earlier then The suffocating quality of your dying breaths, its basically kouyou taking chuuya under her wing and some good sibling bonding that will probably feature some good ol exploration of gender expression and just kouyou wrestling a brat into a suit. I just want some good chuuya n kouyou n some decent chuuya experimenting with dressing up n darn it ill make it myself

There are a few more that are in my notes as possible ideas but these are the ones im sure ill write so i dont wanna promise anything i wont do

E) On hiatus

TodoBaku murder mystery - my original idea for the todobaku bb, i wanted to challenge myself n write something i never did before but then college slapped me n ye i went back into the comfort zone. I still wanna do this one someday, probably over summer. Basic concept: normal life au, Enji Todoroki is found dead in his bed and detective! Bakugo is on the scene trying to determin did any of the family members, gathered that night to celebrate their mother returning from a hospital, have anything to do with it while trying super hard not to fall for the one Todoroki that keeps sticking his nose where it doesnt belong. Featuring: literally everyone having a motive and Bakugo being done with the family drama, Dabi being in a gang and acting like he owns the place, and ice skater Shouto both too dumb and too smart for his own good. We will see does anything come of it.

Season of rain - omegaverse light fic where i, an asexual, look at a trope purely made for kink and go 'what if for me tho?'. I call it light cuz i wont be writing any sex but u know me its heavy on angst. Featuring: Deku squad as a ship, omega sho n izu, alpha uraraka n beta iida n tsuyu. Dealing with such topics as: postpartum depression, sexisam, fear of alphas, arranged marriges, pack dynamics, betas having an actual role and importance, maneging poly reletionships, me harping on about how ideal number of parents is actually more than two and that if there were three genders standard reletionships would be expected to be a x b x o not just a x o. Aka me putting way too much worldbuilding into a kink trope. Basic premise: seeing as shouto turned out to be an omega, instead of training him to be a hero enji signs him of to enter a quirk marrige when he gets older just like rei. Years later shouto has just gotten out of a divorce and with a whole baby in tow is taken in by dekusquad. Hurt comfort ensues as they slowly work shouto into their dynamic and make him feel safe and loved again. Honestly i just want to give this one more time n attention that i have rn so its waiting for summer

Ashes to ashes - a dabihawks (maybe) post war au fic that was supposed to focus on Dabi facing what he has done and who he has become and the almost imposible process of changing yourself for the better when you spent all your life chasing one thing, on one side and on the other; Hawks recovering fron trauma caused by almost being killed, dealing with his newly growing wings causing him pain and being afraid he'll never fly quite the same again and trying to find connections among other heroes just cuz i say he needs friends. Both of them are dealing with very mixed emotions about each other and they work through them seperatly and together, trying to set everything that happend into a perspective and figure out where to go from there. I havent decided do they actually get back together or not by the end of it all. I was planing this and then hori dumped dabis crazy ass on me n now im mostly waiting to see what he does with him so i know what to do with him in the end, smh hori making my life hard :/

[lampsabout-moved]

The Persona 3,4, and 5 Rewrite FAQ Masterpost

Everything under the cut! Including my plans, current fics, and spoilers for all three!

Persona 3 Rewrite, titled “Pull The Trigger” (https://archiveofourown.org/works/18834676/chapters/44696302) -Hamuko is the main character, and protagonist! She does all the major plot important things, cause it’s what she deserves. -Minato is not excluded though! He is still a part of S.E.E.S, and is a senior student. He takes the role of the Navigator. His Persona is Eurydice, to mirror Hamuko’s Orpheus! -Fuuka is no longer the team’s Navigator! I’ve reworked Lucia into a battle oriented Persona! She uses the nuclear skills from p5, and has a big fuck off sword. -Yukari/Hamuko/Aigis RIGHTS! -Minato/Akihiko RIGHTS! -More LGBT Rep! -Not as many social links, mainly cause i’m not a big fan of the P3 SL’s, keeping the party members and a few favorites. -Both Elizabeth and Theodore are included, with the added addition of Theodore staying out of the Attendant fight. They are represented by the Temperance social link. -Shinji still dies, sorry!  -Ken isn’t used in combat as much, cause he’s 9. Same with Koromaru.  -Operation Babehunt? Don’t know her! The gang meets Aigis when Hamuko spots her on the beach. -The Awnser’s time loop isn’t just hand waved??? It’s def more explicit with (SPOILERS), Metis’s whole deal of being Aigis’s Shadow? -Little stuff, like Pharos ending everything conversation with “Time Never Waits”, Hamuko using ultimate personas after finishing social links, Rio’s inclusion, Hidetoshi’s exclusion, Fuuka being trans, etc, etc Persona 4 Rewrite, titled “Part The Fog”! -First off, Kanji is mlm, and Naoto is a trans boy. Those are the stories that Atlus wrote, but refused to follow up on. Naoto’s arc is about accepting himself as trans, Kanji’s is about him recognizing himself as gay. -Kanji is now the Navigator! Featuring a redesigned Take-Mikauzachi! Rise takes his role as an active party member. -Soukanji rights!!! Yukichie rights!!! Naorise rights!!! -Yosuke, Yosuke is bi. His social link itself is about overcoming his internalized biphobia and homophobia. It’s not his shadow’s main focus, but it’s a part of it. -Rise’s shadow is no longer a pole-dancer! her shadow takes the form of a clown like Rise, putting on a LOVELY carnival (her dungeon) to get people to look at her for who she really is. She finally takes off her make-up in the boss fight, splitting into a bunch of different rise’s and begging her to tell her who “The Real Rise Is?”, kinda like P4TA. -Adachi is dead. Full stop. He does not come back for P4AU. -Speaking of spin-offs, Kanami Mashita! After the events of P4D, she gets a Persona of her own, Laetitae! -Biggggg social link changes. A disguised Kanami, Amnesiac Labrys, and Sho all apear as Social Links. Kanami being The Hanged Man, Labrys being Strength, and Sho as the Moon. Other SL’s changed accordingly. -Marie is still present, and is more integrated into the story. She is one half of Izanami, and willingly erased her memories after seperation. She herself carries Fog with her, and appears...off. She has a too-long shadow, her smile’s a little too wide, her eyes a little too yellow, rain seems to follow her.  -Teddie is not a perv character. He’s close to the plot so I couldn’t write him out??? But he’s not as pervy as he is in canon, just a flirt. Also Teddie’s Bi, so jot that down.  -I really liked the concept that Rise’s non “Risette” personality was harsh and aggressive? So she’s really rough around the edges when she first meets the IT, only warming up to them after her dungeon is completed. Think Severa from FE13. -Overall, a lot more actual truth finding, a lot less homophobia and transphobia. Persona 5 rewrite, titled “Invitation To Freedom”!  -this is the one im most excited for HOLY S H IT -okay so, -redesigns for everyone’s phantom thief attire. especially the girls. Ann’s design is more like, a mix between her persona and Shego from Kim Possible? If that makes sense? Less dominatrix, more cutesy evil queen. (Makoto is more knight like, but is still spiky like a biker, Futaba resembles a video game merchant mixed with a tech super villain, and Haru is full on Musketeer.) -MORGANA ISN’T CREEPILY INTO ANN. NO MORE ANN BEING CONSTANTLY SEXUALIZED. G O D -speaking of Ann, her entire awakening scene is reworked. No more writhing for my girl. She still kicks the sword and kills Cognitive Ann tho. -Pegoryu rights!! Shihoann rights!! Okujima rights!! Kasutaba rights!! -Akechi joins during Kaneshiro’s palace, along with Makoto! Makoto gets herself in too deep thanks to her being over-protective, and Ren folds, saying that they need someone with detective work to help them, and as much as he hates it, Akechi’s probably been onto them for awhile now anyway. -Akechi is still the traitor. -There are not one, not two, but three players in Yaldaboath’s game! Whose’s the third player? Kasumi Yoshizawa! -Kasumi actually has her own team of Phantom Thieves! They interrupt The PT’s antics the palace, messing with them in Mementos, being rascals. her team includes Hifumi Togo, Sho Minazuki (the weird uncle who followed her into the metaverse), and an OC! (She’s currently based oN Hatsune Miku because I do what I want.) [This was inspired by a tumblr post I saw once,] -When I say that Kasumi messes with the PT, I mean like. They have this elaborate plan to steal Madarame’s treasure, but whoops! Kasumi has already swiped the thing and is a making a break for the exit! -Along with the standard chapters, smaller ones will be added to give the reader Kasumi’s perspective! She is also a wild card. -Goro lives and has a palace, sorry atlus!! -That one scene where Ryuji gets beat up for scaring everyone? Not fucking happening babey! -All those extra cells in the Velvet Room? there are only three! This is how Kasumi and Ren figure out each other are Royal (Codename still pending) and Joker. Miscellaneous

-I am currently in the process of adding more Personas and Demons to a growing roster so I can give each Arcana an even amount! Most info on the actual Personas, their skills, and the associated Social Links, can be found here: https://docs.google.com/spreadsheets/d/1uHJv26RnGryvx_yhfzloPzIQUAB_cYOtwyzWGAxKdlQ/edit?usp=sharing EDIT: i completely forgot that most of the new personas im adding are from Bayonetta!

-also im indecisive so uhhh help me decide P4 protag and p5′s protag’s name!

https://www.strawpoll.me/18128738 (P4)

https://www.strawpoll.me/18128740 (P5)

[actualbird]

KhKSJSGAKJEJWJSOKW AU WHERE FARAH ADOPTS LYDIA AFTER SEASON ONE AND THEY ARE HAPPY AND FREQUENTLY ARE VISTED BY HER “UNCLES” TODD AND DIRK AND THOUGH SHE IS KIND OF WARY AT FIRST BECAUSE WHEN THEYRE AROUND SCARY STUFF HAPPENS, SHE EVENTUALLY THINKS “Hmm why aren’t they married tho” AND MAKES IT HER MISSON TO BE THE MATCHMAKER. BONUS POINTS IF SHE SOMEHOW GOT RESIDUAL POWERS FROM THE MACHINE AND ENDS UP ON BLACKWINGS RADAR !!!!!! Someone write this!!!

ANON…..THIS IS SUCH A CONCEPT…..

i cant believe i never really thought that much about how lydia is doing post s1. farah adopting lydia sounds like the funniest thing ever because im 100% sure it was lydia who suggested it because “come on, farah, im 16 and technically an orphan and a child of state but im gonna be out of the states so if i wanna live independently does that mean i still have to get emancipated? from both my already dead parents?? anyway, just adopt me, it’ll be fun” meanwhile farah indulges in a brief daydream where she decided to go into jobs that didnt involve near constant danger and a teenager sending her rapid fire texts that say “COME ONNNN. I PROMISE I WONT CALL U MOM. FARAH. FARAH PLLLEEEEAAASSEEE”

so farah is lydia’s legal guardian. idk how adoption works so dont quote me on anything here, but it’s mostly just for the paperwork. lydia still lives in brazil and farah still is in the states with the boys. they text and skype regularly like normal, except that farah is technically the guardian to a child who happens to also be paying her. it’s a very confusing arrangement farah tries not to think about too much. todd and dirk can never find out.

todd and dirk totally find out.

im thinking post s2, the agency is up and running. lydia freaked for a good 2 months when farah, yknow, her legal guardian, was on the FBI’s most wanted list. so once farah is in the clear, lydia insists that she visit wherever she and her new weirdo friends are hanging at. since theres an actual detective agency now, lydia uses excuses like work experience. like an intern. an intern who is working under farah because farah funds the agency but lydia funds farah and—nope. dont think about it too much, farah. deep breaths. there we go.

so lydia arrives and totally nonchalantly brings up that she’s farah’s adopted child. it’s all very funny, and theres some confused questions and good natured ribbing, but lydia finds she doesnt care too much about that. she finds that shes kind of interested in what the hell is going on between todd and dirk….

because lydia doesnt know anything about todd and dirk aside from the fact that back when she was a dog, dirk told todd to throw her off a bridge, and todd actually threw her off a bridge. but then, dirk also took an arrow to the back for her and todd also helped solidify the time loop and save her life. she figures those latter bits cancel out the former, and now that she sees them outside of a case, she notices all the heartfelt smiles between the two. the lingering touches. the loving gazes across the office when one thinks the other isnt looking. lydia notices that…well…

“so,” lydia says. “they aren’t together?”

“no,” farah says slowly with the kind of understated apprehension she only saves for hostage situations and when talking to the force of nature known as lydia spring. “why?”

“hm,” lydia says. it’s the kind of hm that reminds farah that lydia is kinda fearless. lydia went to a random dude’s house alone in search for answers. lydia survived days of being a literal dog. lydia grew up watching farah clean various guns. it’s also the kind of hm that reminds farah that lydia is sixteen and mischievous and really loves pride and prejudice. “they should be.”

cue a wacky montage of lydia spring playing matchmaker and failing so bad because 1) todd and dirk are just so completely oblivious 2) the universe keeps thwarting her 3) farah keeps thwarting her because farah believes that todd and dirk are adults who can work things out on their own, lydia, dont make me ground you. when todd and dirk do finally figure out their Big Damn Feelings, it’ll be totally unrelated to any of lydia’s schemes and lydia cant help but feel a lil miffed at that. but whatever. love prevails, and all that.

why isnt this a fic yet. i want it

[cherita]

10 Climate Fiction Books to Read for Earth Day

Today is Earth Day, that day of the year when we’re reminded to take care of our planet. It’s the only one we’ve got, after all… for now, at least.

But in the world of speculative fiction, reminders aren’t really needed. Sci-fi authors have long thought up future scenarios impacted by every sort of ecological disaster imaginable, whether caused by our own careless pollution or technology gone awry, some strange alien virus, or just a pissed off Mother Nature who’s had enough of our shit. It even has its own cute genre name: cli-fi, for climate fiction (see what they did there?).

Though the name is a recent invention, writers have pondered the perils of climate change as far back as Jules Vernes’ 1889 adventure novel, The Purchase of the North Pole, while J.G. Ballard’s dystopian novels The Drowned World (1962) and The Drought (1964) are considered early cli-fi classics. Today, with terms like “global warming" and "carbon footprint” now part of our everyday lexicon, climate change and environmental disaster are in everyone’s thoughts — and climate fiction has grown right along with our awareness.

Even if climate change has never once crossed your mind (you could be a monk, I guess?), these 10 books are sure to get you thinking about the environment and our impact on it…

Imaginative future sci-fi of a floating refugee city in a post-climate change world:

Blackfish City (2018)

by Sam J. Miller

After the climate wars, a floating city is constructed in the Arctic Circle, a remarkable feat of mechanical and social engineering, complete with geothermal heating and sustainable energy. The city’s denizens have become accustomed to a roughshod new way of living, however, the city is starting to fray along the edges—crime and corruption have set in, the contradictions of incredible wealth alongside direst poverty are spawning unrest, and a new disease called “the breaks” is ravaging the population.

When a strange new visitor arrives—a woman riding an orca, with a polar bear at her side—the city is entranced. The “orcamancer,” as she’s known, very subtly brings together four people—each living on the periphery—to stage unprecedented acts of resistance. By banding together to save their city before it crumbles under the weight of its own decay, they will learn shocking truths about themselves. 

Blackfish City is a remarkably urgent—and ultimately very hopeful—novel about political corruption, organized crime, technology run amok, the consequences of climate change, gender identity, and the unifying power of human connection. 

Moby Dick retelling of inter-planetary exploration to help a resource-depleted earth:

The Beast of Cretacea (2015)

by Todd Strasser 

Master storyteller Todd Strasser reimagines the classic tale of Moby Dick as set in the future—and takes readers on an epic sci-fi adventure.

When seventeen-year-old Ishmael wakes up from stasis aboard the Pequod, he is amazed by how different this planet is from the dirty, dying, Shroud-covered Earth he left behind. But Ishmael isn’t on Cretacea to marvel at the fresh air, sunshine, and endless blue ocean. He’s here to work, risking his life to hunt down great ocean-dwelling beasts to harvest and send back to the resource-depleted Earth. Even though easy prey abounds, time and again the chase boat crews are ordered to ignore it in order to pursue the elusive Great Terrafin. It’s rumored that the ship’s captain, Ahab, lost his leg to the beast years ago, and that he’s now consumed by revenge. But there may be more to Captain Ahab’s obsession. Dark secrets and dangerous exploits swirl around the pursuit of the beast, and Ishmael must do his best to survive—if he can.

Lyrical present-day tale of the apocalyptic effects of climate change:

Clade (2015)

by James Bradley

On a beach in Antarctica, scientist Adam Leith marks the passage of the summer solstice. Back in Sydney his partner Ellie waits for the results of her latest round of IVF treatment.

That result, when it comes, will change both their lives and propel them into a future neither could have predicted. In a collapsing England Adam will battle to survive an apocalyptic storm. Against a backdrop of growing civil unrest at home, Ellie will discover a strange affinity with beekeeping. In the aftermath of a pandemic, a young man finds solace in building virtual recreations of the dead. And new connections will be formed from the most unlikely beginnings.

Clade is the story of one family in a radically changing world, a place of loss and wonder where the extraordinary mingles with the everyday. Haunting, lyrical and unexpectedly hopeful, it is the work of a writer in command of the major themes of our time.

Near-future tale of the apocalyptic effects of climate change:

Drowning Towers (1984)

by George Turner

Francis Conway is Swill - one of the millions in the year 2041 who must subsist on the inadequate charities of the state. Life, already difficult, is rapidly becoming impossible for Francis and others like him, as government corruption, official blindness and nature have conspired to turn Swill homes into watery tombs. And now the young boy must find a way to escape the approaching tide of disaster. The Sea and Summer, published in the US as The Drowning Towers is George Turner’s masterful exploration of the effects of climate change in the not-too-distant future. Comparable to J.G. Ballard’s The Drowned World, it was shortlisted for the Nebula and won the Arthur C. Clarke Award for best novel in 1988.

Fantasy tale in an apocalyptic world of catastrophic climate change:

The Fifth Season (2015)

Broken Earth trilogy

by N. K. Jemisin

WINNER OF THE HUGO AWARD FOR BEST NOVEL 2016

This is the way the world ends…for the last time.

A season of endings has begun.  It starts with the great red rift across the heart of the world’s sole continent, spewing ash that blots out the sun.  It starts with death, with a murdered son and a missing daughter.  It starts with betrayal, and long dormant wounds rising up to fester.  This is the Stillness, a land long familiar with catastrophe, where the power of the earth is wielded as a weapon. And where there is no mercy. 

Hard sci-fi in a post-climate change world where skyscrapers are island homes:

New York 2140 (2017)

by Kim Stanley Robinson

NOMINATED FOR THE HUGO AWARD FOR BEST NOVEL 2018

New York Times bestselling author Kim Stanley Robinson returns with a bold and brilliant vision of New York City in the next century.

As the sea levels rose, every street became a canal. Every skyscraper an island. For the residents of one apartment building in Madison Square, however, New York in the year 2140 is far from a drowned city.

There is the market trader, who finds opportunities where others find trouble. There is the detective, whose work will never disappear - along with the lawyers, of course.

There is the internet star, beloved by millions for her airship adventures, and the building’s manager, quietly respected for his attention to detail. Then there are two boys who don’t live there, but have no other home - and who are more important to its future than anyone might imagine.

Lastly there are the coders, temporary residents on the roof, whose disappearance triggers a sequence of events that threatens the existence of all - and even the long-hidden foundations on which the city rests.

New York 2140 is an extraordinary and unforgettable novel, from a writer uniquely qualified to tell the story of its future.

Spec-fic tale of genetic engineering gone awry, causing ecological devastation:

Oryx and Crake (2003) 

MaddAddam trilogy

by Margaret Atwood

Oryx and Crake is at once an unforgettable love story and a compelling vision of the future. Snowman, known as Jimmy before mankind was overwhelmed by a plague, is struggling to survive in a world where he may be the last human, and mourning the loss of his best friend, Crake, and the beautiful and elusive Oryx whom they both loved. In search of answers, Snowman embarks on a journey–with the help of the green-eyed Children of Crake–through the lush wilderness that was so recently a great city, until powerful corporations took mankind on an uncontrolled genetic engineering ride. Margaret Atwood projects us into a near future that is both all too familiar and beyond our imagining.

Poignant, literary tale of inter-planetary exploration to help a devastated earth:

The Stone Gods (2007)

by Jeanette Winterson

On the airwaves, all the talk is of the new blue planet – pristine and habitable, like our own was 65 million years ago, before we took it to the edge of destruction. Off the air, Billie Crusoe and the renegade robo-sapian Spike are falling in love. Along with Captain Handsome and Pink, they’re assigned to colonize the new blue planet. But when a technical maneuver intended to make it inhabitable backfires, Billie and Spike’s flight to the future becomes a surprising return to the distant past –- “Everything is imprinted forever with what it once was.” What will happen when their story combines with the world’s story? Will they –- and we –- ever find a safe landing place? Playful, passionate, polemical, and frequently very funny, The Stone Gods will change forever the stories we tell about the earth, about love, and about stories themselves.

The ocean fights back against mankind’s pollution in this sci-fi thriller:

The Swarm (2004)

by Frank Schatzing

Whales begin sinking ships. Toxic, eyeless crabs poison Long Island’s water supply. The North Sea shelf collapses, killing thousands in Europe. Around the world, countries are beginning to feel the effects of the ocean’s revenge as the seas and their inhabitants begin a violent revolution against mankind. At stake is the survival of the Earth’s fragile ecology—and ultimately, the survival of the human race itself.

The apocalyptic catastrophes of The Day After Tomorrow meet the watery menace of The Abyss in this gripping, scientifically realistic, and utterly imaginative thriller.

Biopunk tale of a genetically engineered future in a post-climate change world:

The Windup Girl (2009)

by Paolo Bacigalupi 

Anderson Lake is a company man, AgriGen’s Calorie Man in Thailand. Under cover as a factory manager, Anderson combs Bangkok’s street markets in search of foodstuffs thought to be extinct, hoping to reap the bounty of history’s lost calories. There, he encounters Emiko…  Emiko is the Windup Girl, a strange and beautiful creature. One of the New People, Emiko is not human; instead, she is an engineered being, creche-grown and programmed to satisfy the decadent whims of a Kyoto businessman, but now abandoned to the streets of Bangkok. Regarded as soulless beings by some, devils by others, New People are slaves, soldiers, and toys of the rich in a chilling near future in which calorie companies rule the world, the oil age has passed, and the side effects of bio-engineered plagues run rampant across the globe.  What Happens when calories become currency? What happens when bio-terrorism becomes a tool for corporate profits, when said bio-terrorism’s genetic drift forces mankind to the cusp of post-human evolution? Award-winning author Paolo Bacigalupi delivers one of the most highly acclaimed science fiction novels of the twenty-first century.

[marigoldbaker]

2017 fic roundup

tagged by the incredible @catty-words!! which is a delight bc 1) cori is amazing and 2) i LOVE talking about my writing. so here goes

Total 2017 Word Count: 252,499 (.......that’s a lot wow) Total 2017 Hits: 7,515 Other 2017 AO3 Stats: Kudos: 653; Comment threads: 197; Bookmarks: 76; Subscriptions: 49.

Total 2016 Word Count: 61,766 (oh my GOD in COMPARISON i wrote. so much this year) Total 2016 Hits: 4,651 Other 2016 AO3 Stats: Kudos: 360; Comment threads: 55; Bookmarks: 38; Subscriptions: 15.

links and titles to 2017 works

i wrote. um. a lot. like a lot. didn’t realize how much until i had to compile an actual list and now it’s like....wow.

orpheus (4,721 words) that one time i wrote a giles/jenny orpheus & eurydice au. set during....s5-ish? i had fun with this

determination unmatched (1,576 words) set during school hard; ft. giles and jenny in the library and jenny panicking over her Commitment Issues.

the sunnydale high mortality rate (1,722 words) i’m PRETTY sure i wrote this in 2016 for jenny calendar day, but i posted it again as a standalone in january so. still counts sort of. jenny’s musings on life and death in sunnydale.

on gambles (5,577 words) a tara/faith au of the office; tara is a shy receptionist and faith is a flirty paper salesgirl.

bravery (50,445 words) IM GETTING NOSTALGIC because last time i did this fic roundup thing my goal for 2017 was to finish bravery??? and then i did??? and it was beautiful??? fjsfsdljk do i even need to summarize this fic; u all heard me talking about it at Some point or another....it’s a giles/jenny becoming au. i reread it recently and i feel like i’ve really improved since then, but it was a landmark fic for me and the first multi-chapter fic with a complex plot that i actually finished (and last lmao whoops). i love it still

first steps (5,740 words) the follow-up to bravery!! set during dead man’s party. kinda fluffy & pointless but it was still super fun to write

second chances (9,371 words) oh boy this fic is the only one from early 2017 that i’m still genuinely really proud of. set during s6; jenny comes back as a ghost, and only anya can see her.

impromptu vigil for the dead scooby mom (3,226 words) jenny dies in chosen instead of in passion, and giles copes.

missing (13,402 words) s3 jenny, from a world where giles died, forms an accidental supernatural connection with s3 giles.

conscious choices (6,708 words) MY CHEESY ROM-COM FIC. i love this one so much so much so much. told through emails, phone calls, and texts, giles and jenny fall in love (again, sort of) in s4 when jenny comes back into town.

mermaid magic (13,140 words) some anon sent me an ask once upon a time re: jenny as a mermaid and that ask spiraled into a lot of asks and then a tag on my blog and finally this fic. it was inevitable, really.

grand romantic gestures (10,558 words) this was without a doubt my secret masterpiece of 2017. femslash calendiles, set after passion. while attempting to cope with jenny’s death, gil stumbles across something surprising, and then things just start spiraling from there.

restraint (4,305 words) a prequel to on gambles, though they could be read in any order. faith attends the dundies and pines over tara (though she definitely doesn’t want to call it pining). also there is of course some jenny/giles content because i’m Me

forever (4,031 words) kind of still in progress?? various femslash oneshots (faith/tara, willow/buffy, and willow just being a lesbian in general)

irredeemable evil (5,919 words) jenny tries to get used to being a vampire. giles is desperately in love.

on heroes (6,054 words) look i GET that slayers have to be the one-girl-in-all-the-world thing but i hate the cpr scene with romantic undertones so like. i wrote this. with semi-gratuitous mostly-platonic jenny/giles because i’m Me.

fortune favors the bold (2,768 words) jackaby fic!!!! for my traumatized ghost girl and her mess of a paranormal detective boyfriend, who both very clearly have no idea how functioning relationships work, but they love each other so they muddle through. written before i read book 4 bc i was afraid jackaby and jenny wouldn’t get a canonical love declaration & kiss. everyone please read jackaby 4 me

loving parents (6,259 words) am i ever going to finish this? who knows? giles and jenny are expecting a baby in some alternate v happy s5. literally just scooby shenanigans and wish fulfillment.

closeness (1,532 words) my headcanon for giles and jenny’s first kiss!! soft and tentative.

friends with extras (788 words) leverage; sophie/nate and pillow talk. not my best work and i don’t think i really Got their dynamic, but i think someday i might return to write fic for them? maybe? canon gave me so much already so i don’t really feel the need. 

many kinds of magic (2,394 words) my favorite thing about this fic is the fact that i felt 0 need to explain why jenny was alive. she’s just There. willow and tara fall in love, aided gently by jenny. except not really bc lbr willow and tara need NO help to fall in love, so jenny just listens and offers advice.

imperfections (76,843 words) someday i really will come back to this. maybe. hopefully. i wrote it while i was sorting through Sad Feelings and i don’t......have.....those feelings anymore, which is Excellent for me but kinda bad for this fic. anyway. faith and jenny form a friendship in s3 (or: a braveryverse rewrite of season 3 where jenny is alive).

pint-size potential (7,212 words) the first fic in what will hopefully be a series of short fics!! giles is charged with the care of baby buffy summers, a potential who isn’t likely to become a slayer (according to the council).

adapting (3,327 words) sequel to pint-size potential! giles adjusts to his life in sunnydale; buffy throws things and gets excited about animals

inevitability (4,881 words) post-chosen faith/buffy; soft and hesitant and frightened but both of them are still determined to try.

Favorite Fic: DEFINITELY grand romantic gestures. like i love all these fics (and i feel like the calendiles day fics were some of my best. jenny as a sarcastic smitten mermaid??? giles and jenny passive-aggressively emailing?? jenny and buffy forming a tentative friendship over the fact that they both loved giles???) but grand romantic gestures was swoony and gorgeous and sapphic and incredibly romantic. i’m so so proud of it and i want it to get Lots of attention but it. does not. so like...please go read & review

Hardest Fic: definitely missing, because i was writing it under time constraints and i felt like it wasn’t good enough the whole time. but it surprised me by turning out to be really nice!! i went back and reread it and. solid work celia.

Do You Plan to Take Prompts in 2018? oh totally!! i don’t know if i’ll Complete them but i’m definitely down to take them.

What was the best thing about 2017? wow this is hard. this is hard and i really like that this is hard. the best thing about 2017 is 100% that i cannot decide what the best thing about 2017 is. i have a lot of options and a lot of friends and a lot of happy things that i did not have last year. i feel very good about that.

What was the worst thing about 2017? that i didn’t Actually meet robia. but there were so many good things that balanced it out!!

Any last thoughts for 2017? i’ve been saying for a while that 2017 felt like a stepping-stone year towards something better for me, but i think it was actually a damn good year as a whole. i think i need to stop thinking of things as a journey towards happiness and start just...enjoying whatever journey i’m on.

Goals for 2017

FINISH THE TOP-SECRET DETECTIVE AU and find a title and start posting it!! it’s intricate and gorgeous and i can't wait to show it to u all

write more femslash!!!!

stop telling myself i’m not writing enough. i was telling myself that all this year aND I WROTE OVER 250,000 words SO CLEARLY I AM DOING PRETTY DAMN WELL WHEN I’M NOT EVEN TRYING

tagging @regenderate and um i’m not sure if i can think of other people that cori didn’t tag?? i love my small corner of the buffy fandom but it’s. difficult 4 tagging people. so like if u see this ur tagged congrats