#this ones a little more light hearted but still not something i wanna burden my friends with

[blye-flower]

✨ Vent ✨

[minniesfiles]

YOUNG, WILD AND FREE

There was nothing Mingyu valued more than his freedom — not even your friendship.

❧ PAIRING; mingyu x reader

❧ GENRE; angst

❧ TAGS/WARNINGS; friends with benefits, friends to strangers, angst, school au, swearing, unrequited love, mingyu is an asshole, crying, mention of smoking

❧ WORDCOUNT; 2.1k

𐚁₊⊹

▍12 JULY 2015

Eighteen is an age where most teenagers are expected to have their minds set on the future by making plans, and preparing for adulthood.

But for you and Mingyu, life had a different flow, one that refused to conform to societal expectations. To you both, eighteen wasn’t the end of your teenage years but the peak of them — a time to savor the short-lived moments of youth before the emerging responsibilities of adulthood could tighten their grip.

You had your entire lives to be serious, to settle down, and to embrace the grind. For now, life was about embracing freedom and chasing the kind of memories you’d still laugh about decades later.

The word “fun” held a different connotation to you. It was about enjoying the reckless energy of youth and pleasures.

It meant sneaking into wild parties with flashing lights and loud music, losing yourselves in the rhythm of the dance floor. It meant exploring the highs and lows of life without apology — whether through alcohol-fueled nights that blurred into dawn or the moments of sexual intimacy that only the two of you shared.

Those moments weren't uncommon though — they became a routine to you. In the world that you and Mingyu lived in, everything was an adventure, and nothing was too risky if it promised even a silver amount of excitement.

The way you two fit together was magnetic, like two pieces of a puzzle meant to magnify each other's joy and chaos. You pushed each other deeper into the vortex you called life, and he carried an unshakeable confidence that you returned.

But even as you laughed and celebrated your youth, things began to change — subtly at first. It was in the little things. Like the way he would look at you as if he were looking for something deeper, or the quiet moments in which the usual play of your shenanigans would cease and a wordless burden would linger.

“Have an extra cigarette?” Mingyu asked as he jogged towards you, breaking you out of your thoughts.

You shook your head with a half-smile, “sorry, this was my last one.”

With a careless shrug, you dropped the burning stub onto the pavement and crushed it under your boot.

“Liar,” he said with a scoff, rolling his eyes as he sat down next to you. His presence was so casual, as if the air between you two wasn’t filled with tension.

You glared at him, irritation bubbling to the surface. “Mingyu, what do you want?” you asked sharply, crossing your arms in an attempt to create some barrier between the two of you.

“Chill, I didn’t even do anything,” he said defensively, his hands shooting up as though to shield himself from your sharp tone. But you weren’t having it.

“No, I mean, why are you here? Surely you want something,” you repeated, narrowing your eyes. There was no way Mingyu had just ditched his best friend’s birthday party to come and find you for no reason, especially not after what happened.

He sighed deeply, shifting uncomfortably before speaking. “Look, I wanna talk about that night…last week,” he started hesitantly, his voice quieter than usual.

Your heart skipped a beat, and the mention of “that night” made a knot form in your stomach. You shot up from the rusted bench, shaking your head quickly.

“I don’t want to do this,” you muttered, your voice low but firm. You couldn’t bear to go back there — not with him.

But Mingyu wasn’t going to let you walk away that easily. “Y/n, wait!” he called out, suddenly on his feet.

His hand grabbed your wrist before you could take another step, and spun you around to face him. The sudden movement startled you, and before you knew it, you were pressed up against his chest. You froze, the proximity making it impossible to ignore the intensity in his eyes.

“That night-” he began, his voice trembling slightly, but you cut him off before he could finish.

“Please, can we not talk about it?” your voice was almost a whisper now, your resolve crumbling as the weight of that memory pressed against your chest. Each second felt heavier as the images of that night played in your mind.

Mingyu’s grip on your wrist tightened ever so slightly, not enough to hurt but enough to keep you anchored there. “You know we were drunk,” he said softly, his gaze searching for yours.

“And I know those words…they didn’t mean to come out of your mouth. But I need you to understand that I’m not ready for things like that.”

His words hit you like a ton of bricks, each syllable piercing through your chest. He wasn’t ready. He wasn’t ready for what you felt, for what you said that night. And hearing him say it out loud — hearing the finality in his tone — was enough to break something deep inside you.

Your shoulders slumped as the weight of his rejection settled in. It wasn’t anger or frustration that you felt in that moment, but a bone-deep sadness. Your heart felt like it had been sliced in two, leaving you standing there completely shattered.

Yet, you said nothing. What could you say? The words that had once tumbled out of your mouth were now stuck in your throat, choking you.

You didn’t even realise your eyes were welling up with tears until you felt the warm streaks slide down your cheeks. Embarrassed and overwhelmed, you pulled away from Mingyu’s grasp with a sharp jerk, and wiped your face with shaky hands.

“I wasn’t drunk that night, Mingyu. But I was definitely stupid to have my hopes high” your voice cracked as you blurted.

His expression froze, and his brows furrowed in confusion as he searched your face for clarity. “What do you mean?” he asked.

But you didn’t want to explain — not now, not like this. “Forget it,” you said harshly, taking another step back and shaking your head as though that would erase the vulnerability you had just exposed. You refused to let him see any more of the pain that clawed your heart.

He stood still, staring at you as you turned on your heel and tried to leave. But before you could get too far, you heard the sound of his footsteps behind you. He wasn’t going to let you walk away, not without answers.

Grabbing your wrist, he spun you around, his grip firm but not forceful. His other hand came up to tilt your chin, forcing you to meet his gaze. His eyes burned with something between frustration and desperation.

“Y/n, I need answers,” he said, his voice dangerously low. “You’re not in love with me, are you?”

Your breath caught in your throat as you stared at him, frozen. He pressed further, his voice louder now, “answer me, goddammit!”

“SO WHAT IF I AM?!” you shouted back, your voice rising before cracking.

“So fucking what?!” you could barely hold yourself together anymore, your words spilling out in a shaky defiance.

“Y/n, we’re just fuck buddies. I thought we made it clear that no feelings were supposed to be involved, and that we wouldn’t fall for each other,” Mingyu said, his voice firm yet laced with frustration.

He looked at you like he was trying to drill the words into your mind, as though reminding you of the rules would somehow erase everything you were feeling.

“I know, okay?! I know!” you shouted, your voice cracking under the weight of your emotions.

“But I couldn’t help it, Gyu. I couldn’t help how I feel about you. It just…it just happened,” you sobbed, rubbing your face in frustration. The tears wouldn’t stop falling, each one a reminder of how deeply you had let yourself fall for him.

Mingyu’s expression hardened, but there was a flicker of something in his eyes. Maybe hesitation, or guilt? He opened his mouth to say something but closed it again. He didn’t know how to respond, and that silence stung more than any words could have.

Finally, he sighed “stay away from me from now on” he said. His voice was cold and detached, as if he flipped a switch and turned off all the warmth you’d once felt from him. His eyes bore into yours with a glare that was meant to sever ties.

Your heart shattered. The pain was unbearable, like a knife twisting deeper with each passing second. “I want to have fun, Y/n, and I don’t need you and your stupid feelings ruining anything for me,” he added, his tone sharp and unforgiving.

He turned to walk away, and something inside you snapped. Before you could think, you ran after him, grabbing his wrist with trembling hands. “Mingyu, wait!”

He stopped but let out an exasperated sigh, turning back to you with visible annoyance. “What now?” he asked sharply.

You stepped in front of him, tears streaming down your face as you looked up at him. “Please don’t do this,” you said, your voice barely above a whisper.

“We’ve been friends for a long time, and I can’t help how I feel about you. I love you, Gyu. I love you. Why can’t you understand that?”

Your shaking hands reached up to cup his face. Your touch was desperate and filled with longing, hoping — praying — that he would finally see how much he meant to you.

“Why can’t we give each other a chance?” you asked again, your voice quivering as tears spilled. There was a pleading in your eyes that you hoped Mingyu would notice.

But all he did was glare back at you. He took a step back, shaking his head, and pushed your hands away from his face. “The thing is, I don’t love you, Y/n,” he said bluntly, his tone sharp enough to cut through the silence.

“And you can’t force someone to love you either.” The heaviness of his words hit you like a tidal wave, and your knees threatened to buckle under the growing ache in your chest.

He took a deep breath, running a hand through his dark hair before continuing, “And plus, we’re only eighteen. There’s still so much I want to do, so much I want to experience. Getting into a relationship is a huge commitment, and I’m not ready for that kind of thing right now. We’re young, wild, and free, Y/n.”

His voice softened for a moment, almost as if he was trying to make you understand his point. “I just want to enjoy my life and do what I want before I even think about settling down.”

He studied your face for a moment, his gaze intense but unreadable. “Come on, Y/n, you used to think like that too. What happened to that girl? You’re the one who used to say we’re too young to have these kinds of feelings, too young to get caught up in this kind of drama. What changed? What happened to you?” his voice cracked slightly as he asked, but he quickly masked it with frustration.

You couldn’t look him in the eye anymore. Instead, your gaze dropped to the ground as silent tears rolled down your cheeks. “I know,” you whispered, your voice barely audible.

“But things can change. People can change. Feelings can change. I love you, Mingyu,” you confessed, your words broken by a quiet sniffle.

He scoffed, taking another step back. “Well, I don’t,” he said flatly. “And I need you to stop contacting me from now on.”

His words were final as he walked past you, and you didn’t chase this man this time no matter how much you wanted to. You stayed rooted in place, letting the silence envelop you as you silently cried. For the first time, you realised that no amount of love on your end could ever make him stay.

You stumbled and collapsed onto your knees as sobs wracked your body. Tears streamed down your face, blurring the lights of the city around you. You never loved anyone before, not like this, and you never experienced the gut-wrenching pain of heartbreak either. The sting of rejection pierced deeper than you ever thought was possible. You had no idea what it meant to feel this hollow, this abandoned, until Mingyu.

Some of the things he said still echoed in your mind — they weren’t entirely wrong. You once believed that you were too young for anything serious, too young to tie yourself down.

But somewhere along the way, your feelings shifted. You saw a future with him, imagining moments far beyond your eighteen years. Yet, reality came crashing down. To him, you were never more than a temporary connection, a mistake you had mistaken for love.

[maul-of-shame]

BUCKY PLEASE NUMBER 3 😭😭😭😭🩵🩵🩵

Number 3 for you anon!!

If you peeps want to get a number, feel free to check here on the post!!

I only do Elrondriel (Elrond/Galadriel) but if you wanna add Arwen for family fluff, feel free to request!!

3./ Eyelid kisses.

The gentle hum of the Festival of Starlight still lingered in the air, even though the lanterns had dimmed and the music had faded into the quiet of the night. Outside, the stars shimmered in the velvety black sky, their light spilling into the chamber through an open window. The breeze carried with it the faint scent of flowers from the fields where they had danced earlier, and the world beyond seemed impossibly far away—just as it should be.

Galadriel lay propped on one elbow, her golden hair a soft cascade over her shoulder, catching the faint starlight. The fire in the hearth had burned down to a warm glow, casting a gentle amber hue over the room. Elrond was stretched out beside her, his tunic undone and hair a tousled mess of dark curls. He looked impossibly soft in this moment, his sharp features relaxed, his lips curved into the faintest smile as he gazed at her with half-lidded eyes.

“You look like you’re about to fall asleep,” Galadriel teased, her voice low and playful, breaking the quiet.

“Can you blame me?” he murmured, his voice carrying the warmth of a smile. “I have danced more tonight than in the last century, thanks to you.”

She chuckled, leaning a little closer. “You say that as though it was a burden.”

His gaze softened, his eyes tracing the contours of her face as if committing every detail to memory. “Not a burden,” he said quietly, his tone as tender as the light brushing over them. “Not at all. Though I think I was more entertaining to the crowd than graceful on the floor.”

“You tripped only once,” she said with mock seriousness, biting back a grin. “And I caught you, as I always do. That must count for something.”

Elrond huffed a soft laugh, closing his eyes briefly, as though conceding defeat. “I suppose we should count that as teamwork, then.”

As the moment stretched between them, Galadriel shifted closer, her fingers finding his hand. She laced their fingers together, her thumb brushing lazily over his knuckles. “You look different like this,” she said softly, her teasing gone, replaced by something gentler.

His eyes fluttered open again, dark and warm, meeting hers without hesitation. “Different?”

“Mm,” she hummed, her free hand drifting upward to trace the line of his brow, brushing a stray curl from his forehead. “Softer. Not that stoic lord everyone sees. Just you.”

For a moment, he said nothing, his throat working silently. Then, “You see me like this more often than anyone else. That’s no accident.”

Her lips twitched, her heart pulling a little at the vulnerability laced in his words. She leaned over him, her hair falling like a curtain around his face, and for a moment, she only studied him—the faint shadows beneath his eyes, the slight flush still warming his cheeks from the wine they’d shared earlier, the way his breathing slowed as her gaze lingered.

“Close your eyes,” she said suddenly, her voice soft but commanding.

He raised a brow at her. “Why?”

“Just do it. Please.”

His lips twitched, but he obeyed, his dark lashes fluttering closed. She took her time, brushing her fingertips over his temple, the bridge of his nose, the high arch of his cheekbone. Then, leaning in, she pressed the lightest kiss to his right eyelid.

Elrond’s breath hitched, his entire body going still as though he’d been struck by something he couldn’t name. The sensation—warm, feather-light, yet unearthly—spread from the spot her lips had touched, running like a shiver down the base of his spine and all the way to his knees.

“Galadriel,” he murmured, her name slipping from his lips like a prayer.

She pulled back just enough to see the slight flush creeping up his neck, the dazed expression softening his features as his eyes fluttered open again.

“Hmm,” she mused, tilting her head as though studying her work. “The rumors were true, then.”

“What rumors?” he asked, his voice a little rougher than before, still caught in the moment.

“That a kiss on the eyelid produces a sensation unlike anything else,” she said with a sly smile. “You seemed to feel it quite deeply.”

He blinked at her, his expression hovering somewhere between disbelief and amusement. “You used me as an experiment?”

“Perhaps,” she said lightly, though the way her fingers brushed tenderly against his jaw betrayed her fondness.

Elrond groaned softly, shaking his head, though his hand tightened around hers. “You are incorrigible,” he said, but there was no bite to his words.

“And yet, you adore me,” she countered, leaning down again to press another kiss to his other eyelid, just as delicate, just as lingering.

His chest rose and fell in a deep, steady breath, his free hand coming up to rest lightly on her hip. When she pulled back this time, he was smiling, soft and unguarded. “You’re impossible to argue with, you know,” he said, his voice low, a little husky.

She grinned, settling down beside him, her head resting against his shoulder as her fingers curled around his tunic. “Good. I’d hate for you to waste your energy trying.”

He chuckled, the sound rumbling deep in his chest as he turned his head to press a kiss to her temple.

Her lips quirked into a faint smile as she leaned down once more. After kissing his other eyelid just as tenderly as the first, she let her lips brush the tip of his nose. He made a small, amused noise, the corners of his mouth twitching upward as she kissed his forehead next, her lips lingering a moment as her fingers trailed along his jawline.

“You’ve been very thorough,” he murmured, his voice low and teasing, still tinged with that rich warmth from the wine they’d shared earlier. “Eyelids, nose, forehead… yet, I do believe you’ve missed one rather important spot.”

Galadriel arched a delicate brow, sitting back slightly to regard him, her golden hair spilling over her shoulder. “Oh? Have I?”

His lips curved into a lopsided smile, his dark eyes gleaming. “Yes. I’d hate to think you were playing favorites, Galadriel. It’s most unbecoming of the Lady of Light.”

She scoffed softly, her fingers gently smoothing a stray curl from his temple as she narrowed her eyes playfully. “And why, pray tell, should I give in to such a demand? I seem to recall you judging my dancing earlier tonight, Elrond. ‘Overly dramatic’, I believe you called it.”

He chuckled, the sound warm and unrepentant. “It was dramatic. You spun so fast you nearly took out that poor minstrel.”

“I was avoiding you stepping on my toes,” she shot back, her lips twitching as she fought to maintain her composure.

Elrond laughed openly now, the sound deep and rich, and his shoulders shook slightly beneath her touch. “Fair. But I distinctly remember you tripping over your own gown, not me.”

“That is an outrageous lie,” she countered, leaning back over him, her face so close to his now that their noses almost brushed. “You, my dear herald, are infuriating.”

“And yet,” he said, his voice dropping to a softer, more intimate tone, “here you are, kissing me.”

Her expression softened, though she fought to keep the smile from fully taking over. “Perhaps because I find some amusement in your ridiculousness,” she said airily, though her hand gently cupped his cheek as her thumb brushed over his skin.

His eyes softened as he gazed at her, his teasing melting into something quieter, more tender. “Then amuse yourself, my lady. I’m at your mercy.”

She exhaled a quiet laugh, shaking her head. “You’re impossible.”

“True,” he murmured, a hint of a smile tugging at his lips. “But I’m also waiting.”

Galadriel lingered, letting the tension stretch for just a moment longer, her hand cradling his face, her thumb brushing the corner of his mouth. Then, with a smile that was part mischief, part affection, she leaned down and kissed him.

The kiss was soft, warm, and unhurried, her lips brushing his with a tenderness that stole the breath from his lungs. He sighed softly against her, his hand coming up to rest lightly against her waist as she deepened the kiss, her fingers gently threading through his dark curls.

When she finally pulled back, just enough to break the kiss but not the closeness, she rested her forehead against his, her eyes fluttering open to meet his half-lidded gaze.

“Well,” she said softly, her voice low and teasing, “was that thorough enough for you?”

Elrond’s lips quirked into a sleepy, contented smile, his fingers brushing against her waist. “I suppose I could forgive your earlier theatrics,” he murmured. “After all, your thoroughness is… unparalleled.”

She laughed softly, her hand still cradling his face as she nuzzled her nose lightly against his. “You’ll take any excuse to tease me, won’t you?”

“Always,” he said, his voice so full of fondness that her chest ached.

With a small smile, she leaned in again, pressing another kiss to his lips, softer this time, as though sealing the moment.

[buckyssoldat]

Chapter 65: Thanos

Warnings: graphic violence, strong language, death themes, emotional distress, trauma themes

A/N: This is part of my series, Forsaken - The Fallen Soldier. If you wanna be tagged in this, just send me an ask or a message. Feedback is always appreciated, don’t be shy to share your thoughts on this :)

Let me feel the sting

The pain

The burn

Under my skin

After the small memorial for Natasha, the whole team gathered inside the compound, everyone with their suits ready in case something went wrong. Alice was wearing her black and blue suit, with all her weapons in her pockets. The mood was heavy, but there was work to do. They had the gauntlet now, the one Tony and Rocket crafted to hold the Infinity Stones. The reality of their mission was beginning to set in. They had a chance to undo the Snap. But there was still one last question to answer: who would wield the gauntlet?

As the group crowded around the table, the newly finished gauntlet lay before them, its shimmering surface a reminder of both the power and the danger they were about to face. Rocket, always the one for dry humour, broke the silence.

“All right,” he said, his arms crossed. “The glove’s ready. Question is, who’s gonna snap their freaking fingers?”

Thor stepped forward without hesitation, his eyes bright with determination. “I’ll do it.”

Tony, ever the sceptic, shot him a disbelieving look. “Excuse me?”

Thor waved it off, his voice filled with conviction. “It’s okay.”

Before anyone could respond, the whole team began protesting in unison.

“Thor, just wait,” Steve said, his hand going up to halt Thor. “We haven’t decided who’s gonna put that on yet,” he added, his tone more measured, as if trying to reason with the god.

“I’m sorry,” Thor gave a sarcastic smile. “What, we’re just sitting around waiting for the right opportunity?”

Scott added, “We should at least discuss it.”

Thor, clearly eager to get thing moving, responded with frustration, “No, no, sitting here staring at that thing is not gonna bring everybody back. I’m the strongest Avenger-”

“Debatable,” Alice interrupted. “But keep going.”

“This responsibility falls upon me. It’s my duty,” Thor insisted, his voice growing more resolute.

Tony crossed his arms, shaking his head. “It’s not about that-”

Thor cut him off, his voice rising. “It’s not that- Stop it! Just let me! Just let me do something good. Something right.” His voice cracked at the end, and it was clear to everyone that Thor was carrying a heavy burden.

Tony sighed, trying to bring some logic into the situation. “Look- it’s not just the fact that that glove is channelling enough energy to light up a continent, I’m yelling you, you’re in no condition.”

Thor’s eyes flared with anger as he grabbed Tony’s arm. “What do you-What do you think is coursing through my veins right now?”

“Cheez Whiz?” Rhodey quipped, earning a few chuckles, but the moment quickly turned serious again.

“Lightning,” Thor answered, his voice thick with emotion.

Tony shook his head. “Yeah.”

Bruce, who had been silent until then, stepped forward, shaking his head. “Lightning won’t help you, pal. It’s gotta be me.”

Thor let out a frustrated breath, let go of Tony’s arm and stepped back. Bruce looked at the gauntlet, his expression tense. “You saw what those stones did to Thanos. It almost killed him. None of you could survive.

Steve, ever cautious, asked, “How do we know you will?”

Bruce took a long, deep breath, his gaze unwavering. “We don’t. But the radiation’s mostly gamma.” He looked at the gauntlet again, a quiet resolve in his voice. “It’s like… I was made for this.”

Alice stood a little away from the group, arms crossed and her mind whirring. She could feel her heart racing in her chest, the weight of the decision heavy on her shoulders. She had been quiet until now, but her voice broke through the tension in the room, firm but laced with emotion.

“I should be the one to do it,” Alice said, stepping forward, her gaze locked on the gauntlet. “The serum coursing through my body will help. I won’t die. I can handle it.” Her voice was steady, though there was a quiet desperation behind her words. She wasn’t about to let anyone else bear this burden.

Bruce turned to her, shaking his head. “Alice, it’s too dangerous. You don’t know what this could do to you. You’ve seen the kind of power those stones hold.”

“I can do it,” Alice insisted, her voice unwavering. “I’m stronger than I look, Bruce. The serum-”

Tony interrupted, his tone hard but concerned. “It’s not just the serum, Alice. You’re not invincible. We all know what happens when someone tries to use this kind of power.”

Alice clenched her fists at her sides, her jaw tightening. “I’ve been through worse. I’ve survived worse.” She met Steve’s gaze, hoping he would back her up, but Steve, ever the protector, just shook his head gently.

“I can’t let you risk it,” Steve said softly, his hand on her arm. “Like Bruce said, the gamma gives him the best shot at this.”

Alice looked down at the floor, a quiet pain flashing across her face. She wasn’t giving up, but she understood. Bruce, seeing the conflict in her eyes, stepped in again.

“We don’t know it anyone can survive this,” he said softly. “But I have the best shot. If I don’t do it, we’re doomed. I have to be the one.” His voice was filled with determination, but there was a sadness there, too.

Alice took a deep breath and nodded, stepping back. “Fine. But I’ll be there with you. Every step of the way.”

Bruce gave her a grateful nod, then turned to the gauntlet, steeling himself for what was to come. Tony clapped him on the shoulder, a faint smile tugging at his lips, “Good to go, yeah?”

“Let’s do it,” Bruce said, his voice full of finality.

“You remember – everyone Thanos snapped away five years ago and just bringing them back to now, today,” Tony warned. “Don’t change anything from the last five years.”

“Got it,” Bruce shook his head.

“F.RI.D.A.Y., do me a favour and activate Barn Door Protocol. Will you?” Tony asked his AI.

“Yes, boss,” the voice of the AI echoed around them.

“Everybody comes home,” Bruce said looking around the team. They all nodded in unison, the weight of the moment pressing down on them. He then took a deep breath and positioned his hand into the gauntlet, locking it into place. There was not turning back now.

Alice stood quietly, watching Bruce, her thoughts racing. Her fingers clenched and unclenched at her sides, the weight of everything hanging over her like a dark cloud. The thought of the Snap and all that had been lost – the people they had all loved and fought for – was overwhelming. But through it all, one thought kept coming to her mind, and it was the only thing that made her chest tighten with both hope and fear.

Bucky.

She couldn’t help but think about what it would mean to finally see him again. The thought of him – his smile, his eyes, the way he had always been there for her, even when she didn’t know she needed him – pushed through the storm of emotions swirling inside her. The vision of him coming back, alive, safe, made her heart ache with longing.

She remembered all the times they had fought side by side, the quiet moments when they had shared their fears and dreams, the time where they finally kissed and said ‘I love you’ to each other. She had never wanted anything more than to see him again, to hold him, to kiss him, to tell him that she loved him. And yet, as Bruce took a steadying breath and prepared to snap his fingers, a small know of fear formed in her stomach.

What if this doesn’t work? What if it doesn’t bring everyone back? What if it doesn’t bring him back?

She swallowed hard, trying to shove those thoughts aside, but they lingered, gnawing at her resolve. She glanced at Steve, then Tony, their faces a mirror of her own quiet anxiety. They were all hoping, praying that this moment, this decision, would be enough to undo the horror of the past five years.

The weight of the gauntlet in Bruce’s hands seemed to make the room feel even heavier, and Alice’s pulse quickened as she looked back to the man who was about to wield that kind of power. Bruce’s face was tense with the responsibility of what he was about to do, but she knew he was doing it for them. For all of them.

As the gauntlet began to power up, glowing with the energy of the stones, Alice felt a surge of adrenaline course through her veins. This was it. This was the moment that could bring him back.

Bruce staggered back as the gauntlet pulsed with violent energy, his entire body wracked with pain. He gritted his teeth, trying to steady himself, but the force of it was almost too much to bear. The nanobots shifted, locking the gauntlet around his hand, but Bruce could barely breathe, the immense pressure threatening to tear him apart.

Thor’s voice cut through the chaos. “Take it off! Take it off!”

Steve’s voice followed, steady but filled with concern, “No, wait. Bruce, are you okay?”

Tony, frantic now, echoed his worry. “Talk to me, Banner.”

“Bruce,” Alice pleaded.

“I’m okay. I’m okay,” Bruce panted through gritted teeth, his face contorted in pain. He took a shaky breath, trying to fight through the overwhelming power that surged through him.

Alice’s eyes never left him, her heart racing as she watched him struggle. She took a half step forward, instinctively wanting to help, but there was nothing she could do. The gauntlet was too powerful, the risks too great. Still, she couldn’t stop herself from whispering, “Bruce, please…”

The pain was too much for Bruce, and a scream of agony tore from his throat as he fought to maintain control. He managed to push through the intense wave of energy long enough to snap his fingers. A brilliant flash of light erupted from the gauntlet, and Alice felt the air around them crackle, a ripple of energy spreading throughout the room.

Bruce collapsed, the gauntlet sliding off his hand as he crumpled to the floor, unconscious. Clint was the first to react, kicking the gauntlet away from him as thought it were a dangerous object.

“Bruce!” Alice shouted, her legs already moving toward him, but Tony held her back, his face tight with worry.

Steve was right behind her, his hand on Alice’s shoulder, as if to steady her. “Bruce,” he called out, trying to rouse the man who had just made the ultimate sacrifice.

“Don’t move him,” Tony said firmly, kneeling next to Bruce.

Bruce’s hand reached for Steve’s arm, and for a moment, Alice thought he was going to pass out completely. His grip was weak, but he managed to rasp out, “Did it work?”

Thor exhaled, a brief, shaky laugh escaping him. “Worth a shot. It’s over. It’s okay.”

Alice’s pulse still raced, her nerves on edge as she looked over at Scott. The quiet of the room seemed to stretch, but then Scott’s voice broke the silence.

“Guys,” he said, walking toward the windows and peering out into the distance, “I think it worked.”

Alice felt a flicker of hope as she glanced toward Scott. Clint’s phone rang and his eyes locked onto the screen, the happiness in his voice was unmistakable. “Honey. Honey.”

Before they could process it, a missile flew from the sky, striking the compound. In an instant, more missiles followed, pummelling the base with ruthless precision.

Alice gasped, her heart sinking as the building shook beneath them. Everything happened so fast, but the destruction was all to clear. It was as if the universe itself refused to let them have even a moment of peace.

They were so close, so close to undoing everything that had been lost, and yet, it seemed like the universe was determined to fight back every step of the way.

Alice slowly regained consciousness, her head throbbing as she pushed herself off the ground. The explosion had sent her sprawling, and her vision was blurry as she tried to clear her mind, but it was hard to shake the feeling of disorientation. Her body aches, there was blood dripping for her head, but her instinct kicked in – she had to find the others.

A familiar voice reached her ears. “Come on, Alice. Wake up, please.”

“Steve?” Alice managed, her voice weak but steadying. She pushed herself up, her heart skipping a beat when she saw Steve and Tony, standing unsteadily, but alive. “Are you okay?”

Steve blinked at her, as if his mind had been clouded for a moment. “Yeah, we’re fine. You?”

Alice sighed, relief flooding her as she stood beside them, steadying herself against the pain in her side. “I thought… I thought we were done for.”

Tony gave her a side glance, eyes softening for a moment. “Not yet, kid. We’re still breathing.”

They moved toward Thor, who stood a little way off, his eyes fixed on something in the distance. Thanos, the 2014 version, was visible just beyond the wreckage. Alice’s stomach tightened at the sight of him. They had come so close, but now – now there was only one thing left do to.

Tony approached Thor first. “What’s he been doing?” he asked, his tone slightly sarcastic.

Thor barely spared a glance at him. “Absolutely nothing,” he said, his voice low but calm.

Steve, still catching his bearings, asked, “Where are the stones?”

Tony’s face hardened as he scanned the area. “Somewhere under all this. All I know is he doesn’t have them.”

“Well, let’s keep it that way then,” Alice responded firmly, her jaw set with resolve. The time for hesitation was over. It was time to end this. She had killed Thanos once, she could do it again.

Thor glanced at them, then at the distant figure of Thanos. “You know it’s a trap, right?”

Tony nodded without hesitation. “Yeah. And I don’t much care.”

“Good. Just as long as we’re all in agreement,” Thor said, his voice steady and sure now. Thunder cracked through the air as he raised his hands. Stormbreaker and Mjölnir flew to him, his casual clothes shifting into armour as he transformed in front of them. His long hair braided itself as he straightened, and his eyes narrowed, focus razor-sharp. “Let’s kill him properly this time.”

Alice could feel the weight of the moment, a thousand thoughts racing through her mind. The battle ahead would be fierce, but it wasn’t just for them anymore. It was for everyone who had been lost, for Natasha, for Bucky, for all of them. This was the moment they’d been fighting for.

Steve’s eyes met hers as they prepared to move. Without saying a word, he stepped toward her, his gaze unwavering, as if to tell her without speaking that they were in this together until the very end.

Alice took a steadying breath, gripping the handle of her weapons tightly. “Let’s do this,” she said, her voice resolute, no hesitation in her heart. She had killed Thanos once, she could do it again.

And with that, the four of them walked toward Thanos, ready to end it all.

Thanos loomed over the battlefield, his eyes cold and unyielding as he addressed them. His voice, deep and unrelenting, echoed across the ruined landscape. “You could not live with your own failure. And where did that bring you? Back to me.”

Alice’s heart thudded in her chest, her hands tightening around her blades as the weight of those words sank in. She glanced at Steve, Tony, and Thor, who wore matching expressions of grim determination. Thanos continued, a dark satisfaction in his voice. “I thought by eliminating half of life, the other half would thrive. But you’ve shown me that’s impossible. And as long as there are those that remember what was, there will always be those that are unable to accept what can be. They will resist.”

Tony stepped forward, his armour gleaming despite the dust and destruction. He tilted his head slightly, his voice hard but still carrying that unyielding Stark defiance. “Yep. We’re all kinds of stubborn.”

Thanos’s expression twisted into a look of satisfaction. “I’m thankful,” he said, rising to his full height. “Because now, I know what I must do.” He stood and donned his helmet, the metallic clink echoing ominously. “I will shred this universe down to his last atom,” he declared. “And then – with the stone you’ve collected for me – create a new one. Teeming with life but knowing not what it has lost but only what it has been given. A grateful universe.”

Thor’s eyes lit up, crackling with blue lightning, his expression wild with fury and grief. “Born out of blood,” Steve countered, his voice hard, every syllable filled with righteous anger.

Thanos remained impassive. “They’ll never know it,” he said calmly, his voice almost gentle, but dripping with finality. “Because you won’t be alive to tell them.”

Alice’s pulse pounded in her ears. This was it – the fight that would decide everything. She took a step forward, her voice cutting through the tension. “We’re not giving up now,” she said firmly, her resolve burning as brightly as the sparks dancing from Thor’s lightning-charged weapons. She didn’t hesitate, leaping into the chaos beside them, blades drawn, every step fuelled by the memories of those she loved and a fierce desire to make things right.

The battle began, a clash of titanic forces that shook the earth and lit the sky, each Avenger fighting with everything they had to stop the Mad Titan once and for all.

Thor roared, the storm swirling around him as he banged Stormbreaker and Mjölnir together, sending waves of lightning crackling through the air. The electricity surged towards Tony, who instinctively activated his suit’s energy absorption systems. His nanotech armour hummed and glowed as it drew the tremendous power, channels of light streaking across his chest and down his arms. Tony braced himself and unleashed the energy with a shout, firing beams of lightning-infused power from his hands, each pulse blindingly bright.

Thanos, unfazed, spun his double-edged blade with impossible speed, creating a shield that deflected the energy with a hight-pitched whine. The redirected blast splintered rock and melted metal, sending shockwaves across the battlefield. Tony strained against the force, his suit’s systems overheating, until Thor took advantage of the momentary diversion. With a mighty swing, he hurled Mjölnir towards Thanos. The enchanted hammer streaked forward like a comet, aimed to knock the Mad Titan off balance.

But Thanos anticipated the move. With inhuman strength and precision, he grabbed Tony by the arm and swung him into Mjölnir’s path. The hammer collided with Tony’s armoured chest, sending him flying. Tony’s HUD flickered as alarms blared in his ears.

Tony crashed into the ground, his suit sparking and smoking. He struggled to move, his limbs heavy, as his systems worked desperately to reboot. Groaning, he tried to pull himself up, but his vision swam.

“Tony!” Alice shouted, fear and determination mingling in her voice. She fought the urge to run to him, knowing they couldn’t let up for even a second against Thanos. Her eyes narrowed, and she readied herself for the next attack. Alice and Steve try to attack the titan but are immediately thrown away in the air.

Her heart pounded as she watched Thanos overpower Thor, her breath catching when she saw Stormbreaker nearly driven into the god’s chest. But then Mjölnir began to move. Her eyes widened in disbelief, and a swell of hope blossomed in her chest when she realized who was summoning the legendary hammer.

When Steve grasped Mjölnir and lightning coursed through him, Alice couldn’t help but scream, a mixture of pride and fierce joy erupting from her lungs. “That’s my Cap!” she yelled, her voice cutting through the chaos. Adrenaline surged through her, giving her a renewed burst of strength.

Thanos barely had time to register Steve’s newfound power before Alice sprang forward, her double-edged sword glinting. She attacked with relentless ferocity, slashing and spinning with the precision of a soldier who had nothing left to lose.

Thanos deflected her strikes with his blade, but she pushed harder, her movements fuelled by the faces of everyone they had lost. She parried one of his blows and, with a primal roar, drove her fist into his chest. The impact was so forceful that Thanos was launched backward, skidding across the ground and creating a deep crater where he landed. The earth fractured beneath him, rocks and dust shooting into the air.

Breathing heavily, Alice readjusted her stance, determination blazing in her eyes. “I’m not done with you yet, you fucking oversized grape,” she spat, her voice a mix of anger and exhaustion.

Thanos climbed out of the hole, his gaze darkening with rage. But Alice stood her ground, stepping closer to Steve, who had finally managed to get to his feet, battered but still unyielding. They exchanged a glance, a silent acknowledgement of their bond and their shared resolve. No matter the odds, they would stand together, and they would fight until their last breath.

Thanos stood tall, his massive frame imposing as he surveyed the destruction before him. His voice boomed, deep and resolute, echoing through the broken landscape.

“In all my years of conquest, violence, slaughter – it was never personal,” Thanos declared, his cold, merciless eyes settling on the two exhausted Avengers. “But I’ll tell you now – what I’m about to do to your stubborn, annoying little planet – I’m gonna enjoy it. Very, very much.”

Alice felt a shiver run down her spine, but she refused to show fear. Instead, she tightened her grip on her double-edged sword, its blade slick with the remnants of their desperate battle. Steve, his broken shield strapped to his forearm, stood tall despite the pain radiating through his battered body. He refused to back down, just as he always had.

They both took in the sight of Thanos’s vast army, a seemingly endless horde of Chitauri, Outriders, Sakaarans, and massive war creatures ready to bring the universe’s darkest will crashing down on Earth. They sky was filled with ominous ships, and the ground trembled beneath the weight of impending doom.

Steve staggered but managed to keep his balance, every fibre of his being willing him to stay standing. He looked over at Alie, a familiar warmth in his gaze despite the overwhelming odds. She met his eyes, and for a moment, time seemed to slow. Their world was about to end, but they had each other.

Without a word, Alice reached out, her fingers seeking his. Steve took her hand, his grip firm and unwavering, as if in that small touch, they could face the darkness together. The connection was their last comfort, a silent promise to stand united, even if this was their final moment.

“Ready to die fighting, Rogers?” Alice asked, her voice cracking with emotion but laced with unyielding defiance.

Steve’s lips twitched into a small, determined smile. “Together, Onyx. Always together.”

Alice stood frozen for a split second, her breath catching in her throat. She had prepared herself to die fighting alongside Steve, her heart resolute despite the inevitable end. But then, Sam’s familiar voice crackled through their comms, and hope, a tiny and precious thing, sparked in her chest.

“Hey, Cap, Onyx, you read me?” Sam’s voice called, laced with disbelief and determination.

Steve turned his head, the battle-scarred shield strapped to his arm gleaming faintly in the ashen light. Alice’s heart pounded, and she almost didn’t dare to believe it was real. But then –

“Cap, Onyx, it’s Sam. Can you hear me?” Came again, more clear, more confident. “On your left.”

Steve’s jaw clenched as he turned, and Alice followed his gaze. A golden circle of light, shimmering and bright, formed behind them. A portal. Her fingers tightened around her double-edged sword, and her eyes widened as three figures stepped through: Okoye, Shuri, and Black Panther.

Alice exhaled shakily, disbelief melting into awe. More portals opened around them, one after another, and the impossible unfolded before her eyes. They had returned. Sam Wilson soared into view, his wings catching the light as he zoomed overhead. Doctor Strange, accompanied by Drax, Mantis, Star-Lord, and Spider-Man, emerged from another opening, and dozens more heroes materialized, filling the battlefield with life, hope, and the will to fight. Scott emerged from the rubble with Bruce, War Machine, and Rocket.

But it was only when she saw him that her heart shattered and mended in one instant. Bucky stepped through one of the portals, his rifle slung over his shoulder, his hair catching the light as he took in the chaos of the battlefield. His gaze swept across the heroes, and then, as if sensing her, his eyes met Alice’s.

A tear slipped down her cheek, unbidden and unstoppable, and her lips curved into a smile so full of joy it made her chest ache. Bucky was alive. He was here. Everything she had fought for, every moment of pain and longing, led to this. She wanted nothing more than run to him, to throw her arms around him and never let go. But the world still needed saving, and there were more important things to do first – kill Thanos.

“Hey, Alice,” she heard his familiar voice through her earpiece, warm and steady.

Her heart soared, and a smile broke across her face, even with tears still shimmering in her eyes. She swallowed hard, her voice thick with emotion but filled with strength. “Hey, Buck,” she replied with a big smile.

For a moment, the chaos around her seemed to still. The world felt right again, and she could feel the weight of everything she had lost finally lifting. She wanted to tell him everything – how much she had missed him, how hard she had fought for this moment – but there wasn’t time.

Alice took a steadying breath, her fingers still trembling around the hilt of her weapon. Bucky, as if understanding, gave her a small, confident nod, his own expression a mixture of relief and determination. The silent promise passed between them: soon.

Steve’s voice rang out, cutting through the chaos, as he raised Mjölnir. “AVENGERS!” His voice was powerful, echoing with all the hope and strength they had left. He paused, taking in the massive army of heroes ready to fight by their side. The Avengers, Guardians, Wakandans, Asgardians, and Ravagers took up their battle position. “Assemble.”

Alice’s heart roared with the call, the word reverberating through her very soul. She lifted her sword, the tears in her eyes now ones of fierce resolve. With a cry, she charged forward, ready to fight, ready to save the world – and ready to live.

Alice’s heart pounded as she charged through Thanos’s army, her double-edged sword a blur of lethal precision. She weaved through Outriders, ducking under claws and spinning to slice through two at once. Her blade cut through flesh and bone with surgical accuracy, and her movements were a symphony of practiced grace and deadly power. An approaching Chitauri snarled, raising its weapon to strike, but Alice pivoted on her heel, swinging her sword upward in a perfect arc that left the alien warrior crumpled at her feet.

She moved swiftly, taking down another group of Chitauri with a series of expertly timed slashed, her every motion driven by purpose. An Outrider lunged at her from behind, but she twisted in time to bury her blade deep in its chest. Black blood splattered across her suit, but she barely registered it, her mind focused only on pushing forward. She was relentless, a force of nature cutting her way through Thanos’s horde, each strike fuelled by the love and hope she carried in her heart.

Suddenly, a deafening roar echoed across the battlefield. Alice looked up just in time to see a massive Leviathan flying overhead, its gargantuan form casting a shadow across the chaos. It was headed straight for Clint, who was running desperately, clutching to the Gauntlet.

“No way,” Alice muttered. Summoning every ounce of her strength, she launched herself into the air, ready to intercept the beast. Before she could reach it, however, a strong arm looped around her waist, and she found herself hoisted into the sky.

Valkyrie grinned down at her from the back of her winged horse. “Need a lift?”

Alice barely had time to nod before Valkyrie steered her mound upward, carrying them high above the Leviathan. With a nod of understanding, Valkyrie released Alice, dropping her right near the creature’s thick, armoured back.

Alice landed hard but kept her balance, her sword at the ready. With a battle cry, she drove the blade down into the Leviathan’s armour, using all her strength to cut through its thick skin. Sparks and blue blood erupted around her as she tore through layer after layer, carving a deadly path along the creature’s back. The Leviathan thrashed in pain, but Alice held on, relentless as she drove her sword deeper, ripping apart its armour and severing the skin beneath.

The Leviathan let out a final, shuddering roar before collapsing to the ground, its massive body shaking the earth. Alice jumped off just in time, landing in a crouch before rising, breathing heavily but victorious.

Turning around, she was met with a sight that made her heart stop. There, standing a few feet away with his rifle slung over his shoulder and a smile breaking across his face, was Bucky. His blue eyes shone with pride and something deeper, something that made Alice’s pulse race.

Before he could speak, Alice was already running to him. She closed the distance between them in a heartbeat, dropping her sword and grabbing him by his vest. Without hesitation, she pulled him close, crashing her lips against his in a fierce, desperate kiss.

Bucky’s hands found her waist as he kissed her back just as passionately, the world around them momentarily forgotten. All the pain, the loss, and the yearning melted away in that moment, replaced by the undeniable joy of being together once more. The battlefield roared around them, but for a few precious seconds, there was only the two of them, locked in an embrace that promised hope, love, and the strength to keep fighting.

Bucky pulled back just slightly, his forehead resting against Alice’s, both breathing hard. His flesh hand gently cupped her cheek, and for a moment, the chaos seemed a million miles away. Alice smiled through the tears that threatened to fall, her heart swelling with joy at having him back in her arms.

But the moment was cut short as Tony’s voice crackled through the comms, filled with his signature brand of teasing.

“Hey, lovebirds,” Tony drawled. “Hate to interrupt your dramatic reunion, but we’ve still got a universe to save. So maybe less French kissing, more slicing and dicing?”

Alice pulled away from Bucky, her cheeks flushing as she rolled her eyes. Bucky chuckled, a deep, genuine laugh that Alice had missed more than anything. He squeezed her waist and raised an eyebrow.

“Looks like we’re getting called out,” Bucky said, his voice laced with humour.

Alice gave him a playful shove. “Yeah, yeah, don’t let it get to your head.” She reached down, retrieving her weapon from the ground, and glanced back at him with a mischievous grin. “Ready to kick some more alien ass?”

Bucky’s smile widened, his grip on his rifle tightening. “Right behind you.”

With one last shared glance, they turned back to the fight, their hearts lighter but their resolve stronger than ever.

Alice’s heart pounded in her chest as she locked eyes with Thanos. The battlefield around her was chaos, but she only saw him – the one who had taken everything. The one who had wiped out half of existence, including those she held closest. She couldn’t let him win. Not again. She couldn’t let be in vain the ones she lost and didn’t get back – Natasha and Loki.

Thanos had already destroyed so much. She couldn’t let him have the Gauntlet – not when it would mean more death, more loss, more pain. She could feel her pulse quickening as she darted through the wreckage, charging directly at him. She knew she would need everything she had to take him down.

“You took everyone that mattered to me,” Alice shouted, her voice raw with anger. “Now, I’m gonna take your fucking head off, just like I did last time.”

Thanos turned his head slowly toward her, his cold expression unreadable, but his voice was as mocking as ever. “You think you can defeat me? You’ll never succeed. All you’re doing is delaying the inevitable.”

Without waiting for him to make a move, Alice hurled herself toward the Mad Titan, her double-edged sword gleaming as she swung it with a deadly precision. Thanos raised his forearm to block the strike, but Alice was fast – she twisted midair, bringing the blade down again toward his exposed side.

Thanos stepped back, his eyes narrowing as he raised his weapon to defend. The blade struck the thick metal of his armour with a metallic clang, but Alice wasn’t deterred. She spun, her sword dancing through the air, forcing Thanos to retreat. She was a blur of motion, each strike carefully calculated, each movement honed through years of training.

Thanos grunted as he blocked another attack, his weapon pushing her sword aside with ease. “You have no idea what you’re facing, little girl,” he said, his voice a low growl. “But you will.”

Alice leaped again, slashing downward with all her strength. Thanos caught the blade in his hand and squeezed it, the metal creaking under his grasp. His grip was monstrous, and Alice’s arms trembled with the effort to hold her ground. With a mocking grin, Thanos twisted the blade out of her hand and sent it flying across the field.

Alice’s fists clenched. She was unarmed now, but she wasn’t done. She threw herself at him, her entire body becoming a weapon. She threw punches with all her might, landing blow after blow. The force of her punches made the ground beneath them crack, a reminder of just how much power she was packing.

“You’re strong, I’ll admit, but not strong enough,” Thanos taunted, grabbing her by the throat once again, lifting her off the ground with ease.

For a moment, the world seemed to spin as Alice struggled against his grip. She reached up, grasping his hand, her nails digging into his skin as she fought for air. As breathing became harder, she had to think quickly – her sword was gone, lost somewhere in the chaos, but she wasn’t finished yet. She wouldn’t be. Not after everything.

And that was when she remembered – on her left pocket, there was the vibranium knife Tony had given her. She grinned despite the burning pain in her chest, her left hand wrapping around the handle.

With the knife in hand, she managed to pull herself up using Thanos’s arm, propelling her legs upward as she grabbed hold of his shoulders, her powerful hands digging into the thick armour of his neck. Thanos roared in surprise, but it was too late. With a quick twist, Alice pressed the blade to his throat, aiming for the kill.

Her muscles strained as she pushed against the knife, her super strength working against the thick hide of his skin. The blade scraped against his neck, but she wasn’t going to stop. Her grip tightened, every fibre of her being focused on one thing – ending him, right here, right now. She could feel the force of her strength doing its work, the blade cutting deeper, making Thanos bleed.

“You’re not… getting away…” Alice growled, her voice thick with fury.

She pushed harder, her strength forcing the blade deeper. She was so close. She could almost feel the satisfaction of ending it all – the battle, the pain, the loss. She could almost hear Bucky’s voice in her mind, cheering her on.

But then, from the corner of her vision, she saw him – Ebony Maw.

His telekinetic power surged, and with a flick of his fingers, Alice was ripped off of Thanos’s shoulders. The force of the pull was so strong that it sent her crashing to the ground, the knife slipping from her grip. Her body slammed against the ground with sickening force, and for a moment, everything went black.

tags: ​​​​​​​​​​​​​​@capswife

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masterlist

[traversety]

THE HEART OF CHICANERY: FIVE

word count: 2,071

content warnings: alan's incredibly bad jokes about guns and death

CHAPTER INDEX

*****

Roman made it home just before three in the morning. He quickly threw on a hoodie and sweatpants, set his headset on his nightstand, and then crashed onto his bed, exhausted and shivering from the icy temperatures outside.  

This time, there were no dreams or nightmares. When he woke up, it was to the beep of his alarm clock, not the click of handcuffs around his wrists. It was still dark outside. The clock read 6:45 a.m.  

Roman sighed. He suspected that today was going to be a very long day.  

The first thing he did was grab his phone off the nightstand. Squinting as the screen’s bright light flashed in his face, he typed in the passcode and went to his messages. Knowing Alan, he’d already been awake for fifteen minutes (possibly even more) and was probably hiding in his room, waiting for Roman to shoot him a message. After what happened last year, Alan vowed he would be the brother Roman never had. The least that could be done was oblige him. Too tired to think of a witty greeting, Roman simply typed “i’m still alive” and sent it.  

A minute after he sent it, Alan replied with the electric tenacity he was known for at school: If you were dead, I’d come over and wake your corpse up myself. How are you feeling? 

tired, what else?  

I meant mentally. Come on, you’re killing me.  

if i have to hear another joke about death one more time in the next five minutes i will throw your phone into a bucket of water.  

i feel fine.  

You’re not, like, feeling the urge to burn? No signs of returning depression? 

no, i’m good. i burned something two weeks ago and i’m not likely to light anything on fire for at least a few more weeks. 

That’s the spirit. You wanna come over to my place today? We can play Uno or some other games. Maybe even a round of chess if you’re up for it.  

oh gosh. uno and chess?  

alan, you’re tempting me. 

I’m taking that as a yes. Just knock on the door when you show up.  

see you soon then.  

See ya :) 

Roman smiled as he shut his phone off. Alan made everything better. Even the burden of the truth was lightened in his presence. He couldn’t tell Alan about the Society, of course—it was against policy. He didn’t have a choice, though, except to be loyal to the Society at the cost of breaking a promise.  

Alan sat down on the bench and gently clasped Roman’s shaking hands. His Atlantic eyes, deep blue and fathomless, stared into his own. “If you want me to help you, Roman, I need honesty. Can you promise to be honest?”  

A nod from the trembling boy.  

“Okay, I know I’m about to sound like a little kid, but I’m going to make you swear a kind of oath. Repeat after me: First, tell no lies.”  

“First, tell no lies,” he said, his voice thick with suppressed pain.  

“Second, draw no blood.”  

“... What is this, the Hippocratic Oath?”  

“No, it’s not.”  

A sigh. “Second, draw no blood.”  

“And finally…” His shoulders tensed, and a spark of ferocity glinted from the depths of those ocean eyes. He took a deep breath, then let it go. “And finally, defeat all dissenters.”  

“You look like you want to kill said dissenters, Alan.” 

“I’d prefer they were in coffins and not clapping a hand around your throat. Fine, I’ll rephrase that: And finally, ignore the words of mindless idiots.”  

With a groan, Roman repeated the final line.  

“There. No more lying, no more hurting yourself, and no more listening to the jerks.” He squeezed Roman’s hand playfully. “You’ll keep all of that, right?”  

Trying his best to ignore the sickening knot of guilt in his stomach, Roman nodded.  

Since Alan had formed and sworn to the Oath last year, Roman had tried to keep it to the best of his ability. But total honesty meant betraying the people who cared for him when he was stranded and alone.  

That guilt was the one thing that made Roman regret taking the Oath. If he could tell Alan, he would.  

There just wasn’t a good way to tell him.  

*** 

Around one in the afternoon, Roman found himself staring at a be-ribboned pine wreath, about to knock on Alan’s front door. Before his fist could even make contact with the wood, however, the door dramatically swung open like a stage curtain, revealing the grinning messy-haired actor standing behind it.  

“You look like you just rolled out of bed, Alan.”  

“Oh, shove it! I’ve been busy handling guns.”  

“You don’t have guns in your house.”  

“I do have guns. Finger guns. And I use them to attack annoying people.” 

“One of these days, I wouldn’t be surprised if you left a dead body on my front porch.” 

The grin widened. “Come in, Roman. I shouldn’t leave you stranded here in the cold.”  

Roman walked through the doorway, shedding his jacket as Alan stepped aside. “Sorry about the chaos. Mom decided to start decorating for Christmas today, and I can barely keep Adrian and Millie calm. You know how they are.” His eyebrows comically twitched upwards. Adrian and Camilla were Alan’s younger siblings. At the ages of nine and seven, they were brimming with untamed energy.  

“It’s… It’s the second of December. Most people decorate on Black Friday. Why did you guys wait so long?”  

Alan shrugged. “I think Mom needed a break between holidays.” Roman shook his head as he hung his coat on one of the hooks by the door. “Also, don’t go pointing fingers when your family hasn’t even started decorating.”  

“Alan. I am the only child in my house. My parents are almost always gone. I see my extended family once every, like, five years, and they visited last year. Of course we haven’t decorated. You have little siblings and your mom’s always home.” Roman wasn’t trying to sound distraught, but he was exhausted from last night and everything exploded from his mouth before he could stop himself. 

Alan bit his lip. A sign of concern. “I suspect that another night of sleeplessness went down. Roman, look me in the face.”  

Roman flinched. “Alan-” 

“Roman. Please. It’s my job to make sure you’re okay, and losing sleep is not a good indicator of anything.”  

Sighing, Roman looked Alan straight in the eyes.  

“As I thought,” Alan said. “Dark circles under your eyes again. What have you been doing to yourself?”  

“I just don’t sleep easily. And I didn’t want to wake you up.”  

“Roman, you can’t just do that. You scare me when you’re not doing okay like that.”  

“I don’t want you in a constant state of anxiety, Alan. That makes me feel guilty because then I feel like I’m ruining your mental health.” 

A weighted silence hung in the air. Roman felt awkward standing there, his eyes not quite looking at Alan’s worried face. Sure, it was a lot easier to talk to Alan, but his best friend’s determination to protect and provide made things occasionally frustrating.  

The sounds of a tussle—screams and footsteps—echoed from the stairway to Roman’s left. “ALAN! Adrian’s poking me in the ribs again! And he punched my arm!”  

Alan’s eyes widened. “Oh, God. This isn’t going to end well.” In the blink of an eye, Alan transformed into a flash of lightning as he bolted up the stairs. “I’m coming!” he yelled. “Roman, come with me! We can do something together after we handle these two!” Startled, Roman followed in Alan’s wake.  

When Roman reached the top of the stairs, Alan grabbed his younger siblings’ shirt collars and kept them apart. His face bore a paternal smile. “Now, what’s all this? If mom finds you two fighting like tigers, she’ll have to keep you away from the tree so you don’t break the ornaments. Well, once the tree shows up, at least.”  

Camilla glared at the little boy in Alan’s hands, her brown eyes narrowed to slits. “Adrian pulled my hair again, and when I tried to take Raylor as revenge he got angry. He called me a carrot-head, too.”  

Alan sighed. “Well, you two need to stop attacking each other and taking each other’s stuffies. Robbery is a capital crime, you know. Now, I want you two to apologize and hug each other, and then I will let you go. And Camilla, if you don’t want Adrian to pull your hair, don’t get upset when he comments on it.”  

After Adrian and Camilla had apologized and rushed off, Alan placed a hand on a doorknob. His eyes lingered on the stairs. “Well, that went better than I expected.”  

“No kidding,” Roman said. “I’m amazed that they could throw such a fuss about something so small.”  

Alan chuckled. “Oh, Roman. This is nothing like the time they fought over the Heath bar. That… was chaos. Those two can fight about anything. But enough of that. You came here to hang out with me, not to integrate yourself into sibling politics.” He twisted the knob and opened the door. “Don’t worry, my room isn’t a disaster today. You won’t be tripping.”  

“If I trip, I’ll have to sue you.”  

“Well, you’d have to trip over my dead body before you could do that.”  

“ALAN, ENOUGH OF THE DEATH JOKES.”  

“You don’t mean that and I know it.”  

Roman simply grinned and shoved Alan onto his bed (for once it was neatly made). “You’re right, I don’t. But that isn’t going to stop me from suing you.”  

“It’s not gonna stop me from looting your corpse when the jail sentence I get kills you.” Alan was grinning; his eyes were sparkling like the sea on a summer afternoon. He sat up and crossed his legs. “See, what’ll happen is this: You sue me, and I’m found guilty of a messy room because you did, after all, trip on my garbage. I’ll end up with a prison sentence of probably five years, and without me keeping you company you’ll wither away. When I come back, I will rob your grave, rob your house, get arrested, and then beg for the death sentence.”  

“But why die at the end?”  

“Because living wouldn’t be the same without you. I need to keep an eye on your mental health in the afterlife, too, because God knows what Hell will do to you.”  

“I thought you were going to make some kind of horrible joke, honestly.”  

“Do you want me to?” His smile had twisted into a mischievous smirk.  

“No. No, no, no, no, absolutely do not make a pun.”  

“I promise this one will be a heartstopper!”  

A second of silence rang through the air. In that second, smiles broke out on their faces. 

“ALAN HARPER, YOU ARE GOING TO REGRET SAYING THAT.” 

“No, I won’t. You enjoy it, too. Now let’s play Uno before you go insane.”  

“Saving chess for later?”  

“If by ‘later’ you mean ‘an hour,’ then yes, I’m saving it for later. If we play chess before Uno, I’ll exhaust your mind. The deck’s on my dresser. You’re standing up and I’m not, so logic dictates that you, my dear sir, must fetch it.”  

*****

Another card was tossed onto the ever-growing stack in the discard pile. Another game of Uno was nearing its end. 

“Alan, admit defeat already. All I do in this game is win.”  

“Uno is a game of chance, not skill, so your luck is fate screwing with us.”  

“Every time we play Uno, I win.”  

“Not true. I won twice last Thursday.”  

“Yeah. Only twice.”  

Alan smiled mysteriously. “Perhaps there’s a reason for that. Alright, fine, I call it quits. You’re probably dying of starvation after all those victories.”  

“ALAN.”  

“Okay, fine, maybe you’re not dying. That doesn’t change the possibility that you’re not hungry.”  

“... You’re annoying.”  

“So, I was right, then? You are starving?”  

“I mean, now that you mention it, yes, I am.”  

“Excellent. Down we go!” In seconds, Alan switched from hyperfocused to hyperactive as he leaped onto the floor and exited the room. Roman, grinning and infected with Alan’s zeal, raced after him.  

Alan was the sort of person that pulled people into his wake with his personality. It was impossible to not follow his lead.  

*****

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*****

ping list: @oligoweee, @ablank-art

[goosewriting]

Pink 31 with Raph and a reader who's going through a bad day mentally, so they have a comfort movie night that ends with scenario 23, where Reader falls asleep on Raph's shoulder (or i guess arm would be more realistic lol)

Please stay (rottmnt Raph x reader)

scenario 23: A falling asleep while sitting next to B, as their head falls onto B’s shoulder, B stays as still as they can, afraid to wake A. prompt 31: “Can you stay? Just for tonight, please. I don’t want to be alone with my thoughts.” “l’ll stay for as long as you need.”

summary: reader is having a bad day and falls asleep on Raph’s shoulder. 

relationship: Rise!Raph x gn!reader

warnings: angst and comfort, raph being a sweetheart 🥺

word count: ~790 

A/N: oh to have a giant turtle to cuddle with on bad days 😩<3 ended up having Raph move the reader to the bedroom instead of sitting still whoops

(english is not my first language. constructive criticism and grammar corrections are very appreciated!)

– – – 

Saying that Raph was worried was an understatement. You hadn’t been answering his texts or calls. He assumed you’d be home by now, but you never replied to his message asking if you got there okay. Apparently you hadn’t even read them. 

Assuming the worst but trying his best to get the worst-case scenarios out of his head where you were hurt, he made his way to your place in record time. Climbing down the fire escape he hopped onto your balcony and softly knocked on the glass door, calling your name. 

You were sitting in the dark, curled up between the couch and the coffee table, after one of the worst days you’d had in a while. Illuminated only by the lights from the street below, you lifted your gaze with tired eyes and tear-stained cheeks to look at the balcony when you heard the knocks. Seeing Raph’s worried face looking for your eyes in the darkness, it both filled you with relief as well as it brought a new wave of tears, as you were longing for his comfort. 

With languid movements and shaky limbs, you couldn’t even muster the strength to stand up, so you all but crawled towards the balcony, undoing the lock. Without wasting a second, Raph opened the door and came rushing in, crouching down to your level and asking if you were okay or hurt.

Between choked sobs you told him about how bad your day had been. Every single thing that had gone wrong ended up piling up and now here you were, just so done with everything.

Raph sighed in relief to himself, seeing that you hadn’t been physically hurt by someone or something. He decided not to bring up his many texts and calls that went unanswered, as to not throw even more of a burden on you. 

Picking you up from the floor, he closed the balcony door and brought you to the couch. Settling you down, you crawled back down to your original spot on the floor with a whine, wanting nothing more than to wallow in your misery a little longer. With a soft smile, Raph moved the coffee table away from you so he could fit in next to you. 

“Do you wanna talk about it?” he asked, and after thinking about it for a moment, you shook your head, bringing your knees up and hugging them to your chest.

“Alright” he thought of something else to do. “Then do you want to watch a movie?”

You supposed it would be a good distraction so you agreed. Raph took the remote (which looked comically small in his huge hand) and put on one of your comfort movies. You had watched it a thousand times by now, half of those with him, but it brought a smile to your face and warmth to your heart every time without fail. 

As you two were propped up against the couch, the only thing that could be heard in your living room was the sounds of the movie and your sniffles every now and then. As the time passed, you kept cuddling closer to him, and he let you practically melt into his side, enjoying how warm you felt against his skin. By the end of the movie you were fully asleep, leaning onto his arm, with your own looped around his, holding onto him tightly. 

Raph looked down at you for a moment, memorising your sleeping face, which looked much more relaxed than before. Your eyes were still slightly puffy from crying but you looked so much more at peace right now, your natural beauty coming through. 

He tried removing his arm as gently as possible from your death grip without waking you up, which took him a couple of minutes with the way you were clinging onto him. Once he was successful, he picked you up again and brought you to your bed. As he was tucking you in, your eyes fluttered open. He was about to apologise about waking you up, but you spoke first.

“Can you stay?” you whispered, not finding enough strength to speak in your normal voice. “Just for tonight, please. I don’t want to be alone with my thoughts.” 

“l’ll stay for as long as you need” he responded and sat down on the floor by your bed, with this torso leaning on the mattress at your side. He didn’t want to shred your bed with his shell.

You thanked him and took his hand in yours, slowly falling back asleep. Raph smiled to himself at the sight, gently stroking over your knuckles with his thumb. With a whispered promise of always being there for you, he too felt his eyelids getting heavier, slowly being pulled into dreamland. 

~~~~~

🐥 taglist: [more info in my pinned post!] @hearteyedracoon, @maribatshipper, @whygz

[phanfictioncatalogue]

Songfic (10) Masterlist

part one, part two, part three, part four, part five, part six, part seven, part eight, part nine

a wand and a rabbit (ao3) - CloudyPhan

Summary: just a silly little one part about a cute morning in the phouse

close your eyes, wish for me (ao3) - queerofcups

Summary: In every universe, they are together. Also, there are werewolves.

Have I told you lately, I’m grateful you’re mine (ao3) - phasamtasie

Summary: Phil is struggling with feeling like a burden on a day of strong migraines and Dan helps him feel at peace with accepting being taken care of

HOT TO GO! (ao3) - ae121

Summary: Dan loves his roller skating job where he gets to sing and be silly.

He loves his boyfriend Phil, even more.

In another life you still would’ve turned my head (ao3) - natigail

Summary: Dan comes across old black and white photos of two queer men messing around, one playing with the other's hair, just like he did in a recent video with Phil. He gets caught up in the emotions that he would have fallen in love with Phil in any universe. He crawls into Phil's lap and tells him exactly that.

Like Dreaming of Angels (ao3) - steddieornot

Summary: While he firmly believed everyone deserved love, in some shape or form, this was something else. The love he and Phil shared was otherworldly, impossible to contain. It was more than romantic in every feasible way. And somehow, fate had bestowed it upon him, just a guy from a small town in Reading. And deep down, he knew that even if fate rewrote his path, he would still have found Phil every time.

Meet me in the pouring rain (ao3) - HeartbreakHowell21

Summary: Dan and Phil are on a picnic date when it starts to rain. Little did Phil know, it was a dream of Dan's to be kissed in the rain. Phil thinks he's joking but starts to believe it when Dan sings "sparks fly" by Taylor Swift.

show me where my days went (ao3) - weuspronouns

Summary: Through times of faith and resilience, Phil makes sense of his and Dan's place in each other's lives over the years. His only certainty in their ever-changing circumstances.

so I will share this room with you (ao3) - jonsaremembers

Summary: Phil hadn't meant to end up here.

the (shipped) gold standard (ao3) - catboyhowell (bloodyscarab)

Summary: sometimes i wanna quit this all and become an accountant now

but i'm no good at math and besides, the dollar is down

They fade to nothing when I look at him (ao3) - phasamtasie

Summary: Arriving in the kitchen Phil made himself his one cup of coffee he allowed himself on weekend days and stared out the window lost in thought, so it took him a few seconds to register why the light had seemed so much brighter than usual at 8am. With childish delight he saw that it had snowed overnight, and not just the usual UK dusting where one could still see the grass underneath but a proper snow, coating everything outside in a bright white.

OR

Dan and Phil go sledging.

to let the light in (ao3) - cityofphanchester

Summary: Searching for a fresh start after a decade of dead ends in London, Dan becomes obsessed with a storytelling show on Rossendale Radio and a voice that hasn't been broadcast in years.

we freak on the cam (ao3) - freelydopefun

Summary: Two Boys. Late Night Webcalls. Cords getting tangled up in unusual places.

we were never in the park (ignoring tornado warnings) (ao3) - pasteldanhowells

Summary: After Phil leaves Dan, Dan starts seeing a therapist. Then, Phil comes back, and Dan starts lying to his therapist about him.

well, you gotta do something (ao3) - lagoonlarry

Summary: how i envisioned dan's WAD tour conception, and those conversations with phil

when i walk in the kitchen, my heart hits the floor (ao3) - aura_sky

Summary: a phivorce fic

or

Dan walks into the kitchen and he misses Phil.

when the feeling sinks in (ao3) - weuspronouns

Summary: in which a deliveroo salad and a misplaced phone number reconnects dan and phil while on opposite sides of the world.

(inspired by that one anecdote about phil using dan's phone number for his deliveroo account from what dan and phil text each other 2023)

[ickybby]

@sugcrbites

continued from here ♡

she shrugs bare shoulders with a laugh, her long inky strands of hair rippling around her. "most of it, yeah." not too long ago fawn would deny the playful scolding; knowing full well there was truth in every word. would've rushed and all but tripped over herself to play it cool. but that silly little fawn is dead and buried. no longer burdened by the paralyzing grip of shame or the pressures of conforming for the sake of maintaining normalcy; there's no need for fawn to pretend there's not this all-consuming, unsated voracity living within her. not in front of jonah, at least. not when he's greenlighted her obsessive nature. encouraged and reciprocated that sick fascination of hers. fawn's ecstatic to let him lead them down a vile, corrupting path. she sticks her tongue out at her brother in reply to the rest of his playful chastising, a more innocuous nod to what their bond had been before its wicked mutation. "trust me, it's not for lack of trying. m'glad i stole the hoodie too, i didn't wanna walk out of there empty-handed, feeling defeated by your stupid laptop."

what else is there to do in their rundown hometown, other than getting drunk or high or sticking their nose in other people's business. fawn can't really blame people for how they lash out when that restless, itchy boredom creeps in. she knows the feeling all too well, and understands this stagnant town breeds risky impulsiveness in folks. “honestly, i don’t know. and i don’t care. doesn't matter what i told 'em when things can go back to normal between us,” fawn snorts with barely concealed laughter. “well, a new typa normal.” not only did she get her beloved brother back after fumbling the closeness they harbored for one another for so long; now, fawn gains something far darker and more delicious than she could’ve ever foreseen. jonah's preaching to a one-woman choir with those decadent little promises, eyes light up bright as he paints the depravity he wishes to inflict on her in her mind’s eye with vivid viciousness. "yeah, to start with." the ambitious virgin admits with a giggle. "i read online you could press on your tongue with your toothbrush to train away your gag flex… but i don't know if it's helping much 'cause my eyes still water when i brush. still, i think i'd look SO cute throating your cock. i think i could get pretty good at it before our mall trip, or practice lots at least."

amongst the giggles, fawn's enjoying the make-believe he still humors her within the moments before her toys bore witness to further unspeakable depravity. she's solemnly nodding in reply to his immoral request as her brother nears, the comforter shifting under his weight as she settles underneath him. jonah's body towers over her own, though she's always been more on the shorter, slender side so that's not necessarily surprising. certainly exhilarating. despite their size differences, he fits between her legs like he's built to be there. of course he is, fawn's convinced that's where he belongs. the precious little heart between her legs might've once been a personal decision. but now that she knows jonah finds it particularly endearing it's something she's fully committed to doing for him. "yes, sir." in actuality, she means for her tone to be more playful than she conveys. instead, fawn sounds genuinely devoted to her brother as her authority figure. but the truth is, he's been one because fawn's put him on a pedestal for as long as she's known him. even through her tumultuous rebellious phase. she trembles with anxious anticipation as he further parts the valley of her legs. fawn's never felt this level of exposure, which is saying something for someone making so much money getting naked for random men online. "okay… i trust you." when she says this, a soft smile tugs the corners of her lips up as the warmth of her doe eyes zeros in on his gaze; eyes lit up with softer docility she reserves just for jonah. brown eyes flicker down between them to gawk in awe. it's a sight to see; the swollen, leaking cockhead prodding at that glistening virginal entrance, their arousal mixing together into an icky mixture. the sight of her brother on the brink of taking her virginity is nothing compared to the electrifying heat of his length teasing her cunt open just enough for fawn to blink down between them in disbelief. "it's okay," she reassures him, her tone shaky under the weight of her own lust. "promise i'm ready." aching for it, really. the walls of her cunt tightening around nothing before he's even pressed himself forward. "i need to know how you feel inside me."

[naxal710]

Hey all! Been trying to organize my thoughts into something more coherent about recent events. And ultimately just decided to follow my heart and word vomit whatever came to mind. So, apologies for this jumble of words headed your way!

I don't really talk politics much here, and that's still gonna be the case. I prefer to keep my blog a space for me to just share silly memes, cool art, and analysis of characters and media I like. Basically a nice lil' spot to step away from all the chaos and negativity in the world.

But with the recent U.S. election results being announced, I'm reminded of being on Tumblr when we got the results of the 2016 election. That was a really rough time for me personally. Maybe one of the lowest points in my life (not just because of the election, but other factors as well). I remember seeing so much hate and negativity flying from both sides. It felt like being trapped outside in a terrible storm with no shelter in sight. It was truly awful.

And amidst that swirling storm of hate, I felt like I had to at least try and do something.

Anyway, all that to say I've been feeling that way again. So I felt like sharing a few things.

I'll keep posting stuff to my "positivity" and "motivation" tags to hopefully brighten your days. Finding those little motes of light in the consuming darkness do wonders. Even if my lil' sphear of influence doesn't reach that far, if I can make one person smile (even if only for a moment) then it's worth the effort! I wanna do my part to make y'all's days just a little bit brighter.

Also, if any of you need to just talk about stuff, hit me up! Doesn't even have to be serious stuff. If you wanna just talk about games or shows you like to take your mind off things, I'm down! I love seeing people get as excited and obsessive about stuff as i do. Its fun! I've been practicing my listening skills, and I've made it one of my goals in life to try and leave people in better condition than I found them.

Lastly, as someone who's survived a lot of awful crap in his life, I can firmly say that the thing that will help the most is to just love one another. When you're going through something difficult in life, turning your focus to helping someone else always eases the burdens on your own back. You lose yourself in your love for them, and in turn, your problems start to feel much smaller.

Anywaggle, hope this mess of words helps someone! I love you all. And we'll weather whatever comes ahead together!

[chiangyorange]

Are there any lines or scenes in WMAS that you're really proud of that you wanna shed a spotlight on?

this is a hard question bc wmas is smth i like to call an ensamble fic (its literally just pov alternating) so it kiiiinda doesnt narrow ANYTHING down for me in terms of specific scenes.

hm. you know what? lemme show you smth.

(taken from ch 1) Uncle Michelangelo said that the old New York could be really pretty. There were so many lights that made the fog glow a brilliant color that makes everything magical. Quieter, he told Casey that there was always a person behind those lights. Someone was always adding to the beauty.

(taken from ch 2)

He takes his time turning around in place, seeing the tall battered buildings covered in bright colors of paint. Greenery of plants overtake the sides of buildings, framing the bright formless graffiti, the dull grey of concrete to something colorful. It clings to the bricks in a relentless enduring grasp of life. From the windows of the buildings shine lights through them. Multicolored, like they are the LCD screens from Times Square. It’s bright. There are no people, the city is in shambles, but it’s still alive. 

oh yeah the dreamscape is a fucking call back lads. and let me tell you there are more in the fic

(taken from ch 4)

Raph lets out a breath. “That’s going to be hard to find. Some of dad’s old stuff is still in the old lair and we haven’t really… cleared it out the first time.”

(taken from ch 8)

“Is there a reason why Dad and April came back into the lair covered in debris looking upset?”

i keep a lot of details in my brain (dming dnd for my friends trained me whether i liked it or not)

(taken from ch 1)

“Never will the Hamatos continue to live to be sacrificed, not if I have anything to say about it.” Splinter pokes a finger to April’s chest, right above her heart, “I will hold our family close and never let go.”

(taken from ch 3)

Splinter had to think about death a lot recently. Forced to, really. He’s had to think about death a lot in his life in general! It clings to the very fiber of his being in a way where every bad coping mechanism looks just a little too tempting to take up on. Then the Shredder happened, something he thought was complete and utter bullshit that took his mother, seemingly, for no reason. The Hamato legacy he grew up to resent came back to haunt him with a ferocious force, and it hurt his boys. 

(taken from ch 4)

Splinter was so adamant about giving her a second chance after the fight with Shredder. He saw himself in Cassandra in such a personal way that no one else in the family would get. He was willing to let Casey stick around close too. He saw himself in the Joneses that she can never really understand. April doesn’t know the full weight of what it’s like carrying a legacy. She shares that burden with the boys, but to bear it alone like Splinter did, like Casey has been, like Cassandra is doing now?  Fuck, man. How lonely does that feel?

(taken from ch 7)

The hovering and the mother-henning was annoying, sure, he'll give you that. The fact that he had to see how each of his family members grieve over the choice he had to make to save the world? Absolutely hellish, would not recommend. He can see how much it haunts Dad. He can see how much it weighed over his siblings. They all know that it was do or die. It doesn't make the choice any less harder to bear.

something about fucked up legacies, something about generational trauma, something about trying to break a cycle when everything in the world is not letting you

[and a little bonus line for a chapter in the future ;] <3]

[orangemoonxworks]

KINGDOM HEARTS: DIVERGE, VOL. 0 MARCH OF THE FOOLS, PART I — II WRITTEN BY: Naude Lucem -------------------------------------------------

Seven months later.

There were three bell towers that stood in Union Cross’s campus and upon the arrival of noon they’d rang out simultaneously. Even though they weren’t particularly loud they could still be heard throughout the vast campus that was the Seventh District. Union Cross was a haven for the students – many who aspired to become Guardians. As such, it was always busy. The Fountain of Knowledge, a large circular stone fountain surrounded by buildings, food stalls, and shops was a central hub of respite. Aside from being a symbol for the academy, the fountain was little more than a bench for the students.

“Finally! We’re done!” said Amica, a tomboyish girl with messy dark scarlet hair and eyes to match. She laid flat along the fountain rim, stretching long enough for her joints to crack, then groaned in relief. “My brain is so drained right now. I could pass out.”

“Hmm. Our lectures did run a bit long today.” This was Nos, the person sitting beside her. They were slightly taller, caramel colored hair, and eyes as blue as a clear sky.

“A bit? Today was a huge slog! Sitting through one long boring lecture after the other made me want to gouge my ears out.” She yawned, letting her arm dangle lifelessly off the edge. “My eye lids feel like dumbbells. I just wanna sleep.”

“You think hearing you whine all day was music to my ears?”

“That’s funny coming from you, ‘O silent one.” Amica said mockingly. “I’m probably the only person here who’s ever heard you speak. People think you’re a mute, you know.”

“That’s not true. And I’m not a mute.”

“Right, right. You’re just being cautious or whatever. Pfft! I think you’re afraid of people. Doesn’t matter to me though. I like being the only one who gets to hear your sweet, majestic voice.” Amica teased again, though they didn’t respond this time. She lifted her head to see them then grinned. “Oh ho-ho, is that red I see? Go on, say something. My ears are ready for pleasure.”

Nos sighed. “Cut it out.”

“Anyway, it feels good to be outside. Cool breeze, the sky’s blue, and the sun’s shining. I could close my eyes, spread my arms, and drift into the wind. Let it take me wherever.”

“Like a leaf, huh.” Nos replied.

“Yep. Light as can be and one with the wind. Free from the crappy burdens of life.”

The thought of such an experience intrigued Nos. Unfortunately, as soon as they began to imagine, reality crashed down and spoiled it all. They let out a sigh of disappointment. “If only it was that simple. I wouldn’t mind being carried by the wind. Probably feels nice.”

As the two carried on, a group of Guardians dressed in white uniforms began patrolling the area. It wasn’t unusual to see them walking around but these Guardians were from the Lux Unitas, a special force under direct order of the Grandmasters. Given the jagged fox symbol imprinted on the backs of their jackets, they were from the Vulpes Union. Nos watched as they strolled around the fountain. A few of them had their keyblades at their side, and one with it sitting over their shoulder.

“I wonder why the Lux Unitas have been patrolling the campus lately.”

“Probably because of the shadow scourges.” Amica replied, now lying on her side, face resting on her stretched arm. “They’ve been popping up more and more lately. Remember the one that totally destroyed the Second district? Everything fell to ruin, and nobody survived. I heard it’s still being quarantined until the Lux Unitas can get rid of the darkness there.”

“There’s still darkness after all this time? Do you think they can get rid of it all?”

“Doubt it. Even if they could somehow get rid of it all, that district is too far gone. It’d take years, hell, even decades to rebuild. Besides, they’re more likely worried about the next scourge.”

“Next one, huh.” Nos’s eyes followed the two Guardians who passed them. As they thought about the inevitable coming of another scourge, a sense of dread and worry crept onto them. “I wonder what’s going on. Everything was fine up until a year ago. What changed?”

“Beats me.” Amica replied.

“We’re still working towards becoming Guardians, but we have no real experience with darkness. There’s a huge difference between fighting shadows in a simulation and fighting them for real. Most of us would choke if we ever came face to face with the real thing. It’s hard to think about being in that situation.”

“Nothing we can do but try to survive.” Amica said. “No use in crying at that point. Whoever wants to fight will fight, and whoever doesn’t will run away. Honestly, I’d probably be one of the people running for their lives. Fighting sucks.”

“You wouldn’t do that.”

“You don’t know me well then.” She rolled over on her back again. “Believe it or not, I’m the world’s biggest coward. Any sign of danger and I’m heading straight for the hills and not looking back. Better to live than die trying, right?”

“Be serious for once.”

“I am. Becoming a Guardian isn’t what I want – it’s just all there is. We’re taught from the moment we’re born that being a Guardian is the end-all-be-all. And for most people, it is. Almost everyone dreams about being a hero so they can live out fantasies or protect whatever they love. But for the people who just want to live, all we can do is chase other people’s dreams. What we want doesn’t matter.”

She continued, a pitied smile on her face. “Sounds messed up, doesn’t it? Nothing to be sad about though. We all have our roles to play in this parade. Some people just get the shorter end of the stick.”

“I…didn’t know you felt the way.”

“Eh. Guardian or not,” she sat upright then pivoted herself so her legs could hang off the fountain’s edge. “I’m going to live my life the way I want. You should too. Life would totally suck if you just go with the flow and not try to be whoever you want to be.”

“Sure, but I don’t know who I’d want to be? Almost everyone in the Lux Unitas is special. They all have something that sets them apart. As for me, I can’t say that I’m special in any shape or form, so being myself is out of the question.”

“You’re selling yourself short as always. You don’t have to be special to be somebody, you goober. Just be true to yourself. Besides I like you just the way you are.” Amica grinned then poked her finger into the side of their cheek. “And don’t go getting all strawberry faced. You know what I mean.”

“Yeah, I know. Now stop poking me! The edge of your nail feels like a razor blade!”

“Anyway,” she said, having stopped. She pushed herself off the fountain then raised both her arms up as if she were cheering, letting out a relieved grunt. “Enough of the gloomy talk. We’ve got the rest of the afternoon to ourselves, no? Let’s hit up some of the food stalls for some grub. And maybe we can cop a treat or two on the side.”

Nos smirked. “Uh huh. You just want an excuse to go to the shop that sells the star-shaped fruit.”

“Yeah, yeah, whatever. Let’s go!”

Amica snatched Nos’s arm, yanking them up from the fountain and almost causing them to trip over themselves, then pulled Nos along with her. -------------------------------------------------

[nel-world]

h

raise me up

When I am down and, oh my soul, so weary

When troubles come and my heart burdened be

Then, I am still and wait here in the silence

Until You come and sit awhile with me.

You raise me up, so I can stand on mountains

You raise me up, to walk on stormy seas

I am strong, when I am on your shoulders

You raise me up to more than I can be

//

Georgia

Georgia, Georgia

The whole day through (the whole day through)

Just an old sweet song

Keeps Georgia on my mind (Georgia on my mind)

I said Georgia

Georgia

A song of you (a song of you)

Comes as sweet and clear

As moonlight through the pines

Other arms reach out to me

Other eyes smile tenderly

Still in peaceful dreams I see

The road leads back to you

I said Georgia

Oh Georgia, no peace I find (no peace I find)

Just an old sweet song

Keeps Georgia on my mind (Georgia on my mind)

Other arms reach out to me

Other eyes smile tenderly

Still in peaceful dreams I see

The road leads back to you

Whoa-whoa, Georgia

Georgia

No peace, no peace I find

Just an old, sweet song

Keeps Georgia on my mind (Georgia on my mind)

I said just an old sweet song

Keeps Georgia on my mind

heartbreak

alloons are deflated

Guess they look lifeless like me

We miss you on your side of the bed, mmm

Still got your things here

And they stare at me like souvenirs

Don't wanna let you out my head

Just like the day that I met you

The day I thought forever

Said that you love me

But that'll last for never

It's cold outside

Like when you walked out my life

Why you walk out my life?

I get like this every time

On these days that feel like you and me

Heartbreak anniversary

'Cause I remember every time

On these days that feel like you and me

Heartbreak anniversary

Do you ever think of me?

no

(Ooh) no-no, no

(Ooh, ooh, ooh) ooh, nah

I'm buildin' my hopes up

Like presents unopened 'til this day

I still see the messages you read, mmm

I'm foolishly patient

(Foolishly patient)

Can't get past the taste of your lips

(Taste of your lips)

Don't wanna let you out my head

your song

blackbird

Blackbird singing in the dead of night

Take these broken wings and learn to fly

All your life, you were only waiting

For this moment to arise

[Verse 2]

Blackbird singing in the dead of night

Take these sunken eyes and learn to see

All your life, you were only waiting

For this moment to be free

[Chorus]

Blackbird fly

Blackbird fly

Into the light

Of a dark, black night

Blackbird fly

something to talk abt

People are talking, talking 'bout people

I hear them whisper, you won't believe it

They think we're lovers kept under cover

I just ignore it, but they keep saying

We laugh just a little too loud

Stand just a little too close

We stare just a little too long

Maybe they're seein' something we don't, darling

[Chorus]

Let's give 'em something to talk about

Let's give 'em something to talk about

Let's give 'em something to talk about

How about love?

[Verse 2]

I feel so foolish, I never noticed

You'd act so nervous, could you be falling for me?

It took the rumor to make me wonder

i know its good

from this moment

From this moment, life has begun

From this moment, you are the one

Right beside you is where I belong

From this moment on

From this moment, I have been blessed

I live only for your happiness

And for your love, I'd give my last breath

From this moment on

[Chorus 1: Shania Twain, Bryan White, Both]

I give my hand to you with all my heart

I can't wait to live my life with you, can't wait to start

You and I will never be apart

My dreams came true because of you

[Verse 2: Shania Twain & Bryan White]

From this moment, as long as I live

I will love you, I promise you this

There is nothing I wouldn't give

From this moment on

Ohh

only u

Only you can make, oh, this world seem right

Only you can make the darkness bright

Only you and you alone can thrill me like you do

And fill my heart with love for only you

[Verse 2]

Only you can make, oh, this change in me

For it's true, you are my destiny

When you hold my hand, I understand the magic that you do

You're my dream come true, my one and only you

[Verse 3]

Only you can make, oh, this change in me

For it's true, you are my destiny

When you hold my hand, I understand the magic that you do

You're my dream come true, my one and only you

summertime

You feel like summertime

You took this heart of mine

You'll be my valentine in the summer, in the summer

You are my only one

Just dancin'; having fun

Out in the shinin' sun of the summer, of the summer

[Chorus]

Do love me, do love me, do

Do love me, do love me, do (yeah)

I love you

Is it summertime magic

That makes me wanna dance all night long?

It's your summertime magic

Make me feel this way

Got me boo'd up

Girl, oh you're my world (baby!)

Baby girl (woo, ah!) my whole world, hoo, oh!

amarilo

Amarillo by morning, up from San Antone

Everything that I got is just what I've got on

When that sun is high in that Texas sky

I'll be buckin' at the county fair

Amarillo by morning

Amarillo, I'll be there

[Verse 2]

They took my saddle in Houston, broke my leg in Santa Fe

Lost my wife and a girlfriend, somewhere along the way

Well, I'll be lookin' for eight when they pull that gate

And I hope that judge ain't blind

Amarillo by morning

Amarillo's on my mind

[Verse 3]

Amarillo by morning, up from San Antone

Everything that I got is just what I've got on

I ain't got a dime, but what I got is mine

I ain't rich, but Lord, I'm free

Amarillo by morning

Amarillo is where I'll be

friends in low places

Blame it all on my roots, I showed up in boots

And ruined your black tie affair

The last one to know, the last one to show

I was the last one you thought you'd see there

And I saw the surprise, and the fear in his eyes

When I took his glass of champagne

And I toasted you, said, "Honey, we may be through

But you'll never hear me complain"

[Chorus: George Strait, Jason Aldean, Garth Brooks, Florida Georgia Line]

'Cause I've got friends in low places

Where the whiskey drowns and the beer chases

My blues away

And I'll be okay

I'm not big on social graces

Think I'll slip on down to the Oasis

Oh, I've got friends in low places

[Verse 2: Jason Aldean, Florida Georgia Line, George Strait, Garth Brooks]

Well, I guess I was wrong, I just don't belong

But then, I've been there before

Everything's alright, I'll just say goodnight

And I'll show myself to the door

Hey, I didn't mean, to cause a big scene

Just give me an hour and then

Well I'll be as high as that ivory tower

That you're livin' in

your man

Baby lock the door and turn the lights down low

Put some music on that's soft and slow

Baby we ain't got no place to go

I hope you understand

[Chorus]

I've been thinking about this all day long

Never felt a feeling quite this strong

I can't believe how much it turns me on

Just to be your man

[Bridge]

There's no hurry

Don't you worry

We can take our time

Come a little closer

Lets go over

What I had in mind

hard to handle

Baby, here I am, I'm the man on the scene

I can give you what you want, but you gotta come home with me

I've got some good old lovin', and I got some more in store

When I get through throwin' it on you, you got to come back for more

[Chorus]

Boys and things that come by the dozen

That ain't nothin' but drugstore lovin'

Hey little thing, let me light your candle

'Cause, mama, I'm so hard to handle now

Yes sir, I'm

[Verse 2]

Action speaks louder than words, and I'm a man of great experience

I know you got another man, but I can love you better than him

Take my hand, don't be afraid, I'm gonna prove every word I say

I'm advertising love for free, so you can place your ad with me

higher ground

[Verse 1]

People keep on learning

Soldiers keep on warring

World keep on turning

'Cause it won't be too long

[Verse 2]

Powers keep on lying

While your people keep on dying

World keep on turning

'Cause it won't be too long

[Chorus]

I'm so darn glad He let me try it again

'Cause my last time on earth, I lived a whole world of sin

I'm so glad that I know more than I knew then

Going to keep on trying

'Til I reach my highest ground

beat goes on

hit the road jack

Hit the road, Jack, and don't ya come back

No more, no more, no more, no more

Hit the road, Jack, and don't ya come back no more

What'd you say?

Hit the road, Jack, and don't ya come back

No more, no more, no more, no more

Hit the road, Jack, and don't ya come back no more

[Verse 1: Ray Charles & The Raelettes]

Old woman, old woman, don't treat me so mean

You're the meanest old woman that I've ever seen

I guess if you say so

I'll have to pack my things and go (That's right)

[Chorus: The Raelettes & Ray Charles]

Hit the road, Jack, and don't ya come back

No more, no more, no more, no more

Hit the road, Jack, and don't ya come back no more

nothing on u

Beautiful girls all over the world

I could be chasin', but my time would be wasted

They got nothin' on you, baby

Nothin' on you, baby

They might say "Hi", and I might say "Hey"

But you shouldn't worry about what they say

'Cause they got nothin' on you, baby

(Yeah) Nothin' on you, baby

Na—na—na—nothin' on you, baby

Na—nothin' on you, ha!

Yeah

[Verse 1: B.o.B]

I know you feel where I'm comin' from (From)

Regardless of the things in my past that I've done (Done)

Most of it really was for the hell of the fun (The fun)

On the carousel, so around I spun (Spun)

With no directions, just tryna get some (Some?)

Tryna chase skirts, livin' in the summer sun (Sun?)

And so I lost more than I had ever won (Won)

And honestly, I ended up with none (Huh?)

[Verse 2: B.o.B]

There's so much nonsense, it's on my conscience

I'm thinkin' maybe I should get it out

And I don't wanna sound redundant, but I was wonderin'

river

Been travelling these wide roads

For so long

My heart's been far from you

Ten thousand miles gone

[Refrain]

Oh, I wanna come near and give

Every part of me

But there's blood on my hands

And my lips are unclean

[Verse 2]

In my darkness I remember

Momma's words reoccur to me

"Surrender to the good Lord

And he'll wipe your slate clean"

[Chorus]

Take me to your river

I wanna go

Oh, go, take me to your river

I wanna know

[Verse 3]

Dip me in your smooth water

As I go in

As a man with many crimes, come up for air

As my sins flow down the Jordan

happy

It might seem crazy what I'm 'bout to say

Sunshine she's here, you can take a break

I'm a hot air balloon that could go to space

With the air, like I don't care, baby, by the way, huh

[Chorus]

(Because I'm happy)

Clap along if you feel like a room without a roof

(Because I'm happy)

Clap along if you feel like happiness is the truth

(Because I'm happy)

Clap along if you know what happiness is to you

(Because I'm happy)

Clap along if you feel like that's what you wanna do

crazy

Hallelujah I Love Her So

Let me tell you 'bout a girl I know

She is my baby and she lives next door

Every mornin' 'fore the sun comes up

She brings me coffee in my favorite cup

That's why I know, yes, I know

Hallelujah, I just love her so

When I'm in trouble and I have no friend

I know she'll go with me until the end

Everybody asks me how I know

I smile at them and say, "She told me so"

That's why I know, oh, I know

Hallelujah, I just love her so

Now, if I call her on the telephone

And tell her that I'm all alone

By the time I count from one to four

I hear her (KNOCK) on my door

In the evening when the sun goes down

When there is nobody else around

She kisses me and she holds me tight

unbreak my heart

just my imagination

Each day through my window I watch her as she passes by

I say to myself, "You're such a lucky guy"

To have a girl like her is truly a dream come true

Out of all the fellows in the world, she belongs to you

[Chorus]

But it was just my imagination

Runnin' away with me

It was just my imagination

Runnin' away with me

[Verse 2]

Ooh (Soon)

Soon we'll be married and raise a family (Oh yeah)

seven nation army

one shot……….

I am not throwing away my shot

I am not throwing away my shot

Hey, yo, I'm just like my country

I'm young, scrappy and hungry

And I'm not throwing away my shot

I'ma get a scholarship to King's College

I prob'ly shouldn't brag, but dag, I amaze and astonish

The problem is I got a lot of brains, but no polish

I gotta holler just to be heard

With every word, I drop knowledge

I'm a diamond in the rough, a shiny piece of coal

Tryin' to reach my goal, my power of speech unimpeachable

Only nineteen, but my mind is older

These New York City streets get colder, I shoulder

Ev'ry burden, ev'ry disadvantage

I have learned to manage, I don't have a gun to brandish

I walk these streets famished

The plan is to fan this spark into a flame

But damn, it's getting dark, so let me spell out the name

I am the—

irrestible bitch--

All my partners ask me why I take so much abuse

Why am I so faithful, honey, why are you so loose?

Why am I the one who never gets to take you home?

They don't know the things you do to me when we're alone

Irresistible bitch

I love the way you walk

Irresistible bitch

Ooh, the way you talk

Irresistible bitch

I love the way you kiss

Irresistible

Oh God, I wish I could resist

Every Friday night I call your butt up on the phone

A deeper voice answers and it says you're not at home

I bet you think that I'm a fool who'll go for any line

Well honey, put down all your money, you win every time

Irresistible bitch

I love the way you walk

Irresistible bitch

Ooh, the way you talk

Irresistible bitch

I love the way you kiss

Irresistible

Oh God, I wish I could resist, turn it up

ring of fire---------

I get delirious whenever you're near

Lose all self-control, baby, just can't steer

Wheels get locked in place

Stupid look on my face

It comes to making a pass, pretty mama

I just can't win a race

[Chorus]

Because I get delirious

Delirious

Delirious

[Verse 2]

I get delirious when you hold my hand

Body gets so weak I can hardly stand

My temperature's running hot

Baby, you got to stop

'Cause if you don't, I'm going to explode

And, girl, I got a lot

[grasshopperdoingdogpaddle]

Cut it off, cut down your loss All that stubborn loyalty is gonna get you killed For the puppets on TV There is comfort in the strings If you're gonna control me At least make it interesting theatrically How does it feel to be free? Hmm, "why don't you try it yourself?" (Ha)

Cut it off, you've already lost All that precious bravery is gonna get you hurt In a world that feeds on the minority May that self-centered belief lead you to peace If you're gonna replace me At least have the audacity to kill me thoroughly

This one feels upbeat and exciting, if a little bit anxious. Like the start of a grand adventure for something that's still taking its very first steps, but has to hit the ground running.

The bits about the dangers of loyalty and bravery in a world that's stacked against it definitely feel like they're pointing towards something.

I'm not familiar with “Library of Ruina” where this is from, but I'll definitely look into it.

I want to see you, but I can't see you… This feeling is painful. I can't say it, but I want to say it. I just keep letting my chance slip by. But still (But still) But still (But still), spreading out wings together! I want to marathon through the sky and dream in unison!

Catch You, Catch Me, a truly upbeat song! This one's much more hopeful than the last! And I actually am familiar with Cardcaptor Sakura, so if this is suggesting that there'll be some Sakura Kinomoto vibes to whatever character this playlist belongs to, I'm already looking forward to them!

And the feeling of powerful, earnest feelings that keep getting swept away and can't be conveyed, time and time and time again...

There ain't no perfect time for any big change Especially when not ready More time seems more brutal 'Til it catches you Either you go with flow or force it Without determination But you're not alone in this complication So come with me On your mark, y'all get set, then pull the trigger and go Make a move before they can make an act on you No one but you can change your own world Ain't nobody else will do it for you

Some of my regrets come hunting me 'til this day Choice I made, it was wrong How thoughtless to believe That I was alone I learned it harder way but you don't have to Go through what I've been through 'Cause you're not alone in this frustration So come with me

Another upbeat song, this whole playlist makes me wanna grin and dance and run, somehow. And the lyrics feel very straightforward.

A rallying cry, a remind that you aren't alone in this fight, solidarity to stand together, even in the pain of the regrets and mistakes made from when they erroneously thought that this was a fight they had to bare the burdens of on their own.

"It took me a while to figure this out, but I don't have to be alone in these hardships. I'm not alone." sort of feeling.

You are the oceans grey waves destined to seek life beyond the shore, just out of reach. Yet the waters ever change, flowing like time, the path is yours to climb

In the white light, a hand reaches through, a double edged blade cuts your heart in two. Waking dreams fade away. Embrace the brand new day Sing with me a song of birthrights and love. The light scatters to the sky above. Dawn breaks through the gloom, white as a bone, lost in thoughts all alone

The most somber song on the list, by far. And multiple versions of it included within it.

The ocean's grey waves, destined to reach for ever-changing things just out of reach… A double-edged blade cutting a heart in half and waking someone up to a new day… Birthrights and love…

Conquest and fate… A pillar cracking beneath its own weight as night falls… Joy and pain falling like tides with the flow of destiny… A thorn in your heart becoming a rose… A sinking burdened heart, and a silently falling veil…

A final song before light's sacrifice A world with no more darkness and night, but at a pyrrhic cost

A very dense song, lots to draw just from the lyrics themselves. I don't know much about the game it comes from though...

-

Well, from this peak, I can definitely say the character for this playlist seems more lively and lighthearted than the one from the other playlist. Maybe with some deeper tragedies to it though. But the playlist itself gives this fun, soothing vibe to it.

If this is a character that's Masked Stranger adjacent, that makes me a little more inclined to trust the Masked Stranger, I think.

As promised for this interlude week, here's a little something special. One of two other Playlists that will be developed alongside the Masked Stranger's! So the playlists will be rotated in how they update.

This one will be about someone who's very close to the Masked Stranger, and who is a big motivation for him and what he's doing.

String Theocracy by Mili

Catch You Catch Me by Megumi Hinata

Pull The Trigger by Mayumi Fujita

Lost In Thoughts All Alone (Full Heirs of Fate Arrangement)

[sincerelyangelina12]

Letter # (1/10/24)

Dear Eliza,

The other day I saw that you had liked this post about people who'd essentially been ghosted by their friends, they'd tried to reach out and got crickets for months, or something like that. And I couldn't help but feel this pit in my stomach that you thought of me when you liked it.

There's also this part of my brain, the evil vile part that stole what was supposed to be the golden years of my youth, tells me that you A) hate me because of this in a way that's like you wanna curse my bloodlines for generations and you wish that I was dead and B) simultaneously couldn't give a fuck about me and you were thinking about someone else.

I'm sorry. I know it's not what you want to hear or that it will make up for anything if you even care anymore. I never meant to be silence for this long. To become scared to leave the house. To be filled with this anxiety everywhere and anywhere I turn. For the first time in my life, I have to sleep with a fucking night light because I've gained a paralyzing fear of the dark. It happened sometime around August. I don't remember why, I just remember feeling this shift and being scarily aware that I shouldn't be feeling this way.

I know you don't want to hear that I was depressed. That I wanted to just not exist anymore. That I got so physically ill from my anxiety that I started losing my hair.

It's not an excuse. I shouldn't have hid away in isolation when you cared about me.

But I also feel that if you cared about me, why didn't you ever call me? Why didn't you make plans with me? You only did it when there was no one else around to be with you. Sometimes I feel like I was a void for a spot in your heart that is now filled.

You once told me your kinda-ex called you out on how you treated him like he was your boyfriend without any of the privileges of label of an actual relationship. I understand it. I remember exactly where I was when I understood. Sitting in English class, sharing a look across the table with my friend that you find annoyoing.

The petty part of me feels like it was justified. Yes, you reached out, but only a few times. You spent all summer hanging out with the rest of the friend group like you always did. You guys always hung out without me. I just tagged along because it would've been awkward if you made plans in front of me and didn't invite me, right?

You stopped giving me as much time once you got a boyfriend. Okay, fine, I understand you're gonna spend time with him. But to constantly cancel plans just to hang out with him or to lie about where you are, and don't act like you never did, so we wouldn't find out what you were doing?

He took my spot in all of your guys' cars, so I was never a thought to invite anymore when he was there. I didn't like him. Everyone else did. I never said a word about because I wasn't about to be the oddball out even more and lose the few friends I had. I was never jealous of him as a person. Just that he could have been anyone and everyone would forget about me in the blink of an eye.

You all probably hate me, don't you? A part of me feels like you always did.

It's justified. I still hate me too.

I spent so long rotting away this summer, you don't even know the half of it. My mental health has never been worse. Not to mention my rollercoaster of physical health. It's been a really rough year. There are millions of little things and big things I never opened to anyone about. I don't want to burden you with anything real. Because my reality is scary. I don't want to keep losing friendships and bringing down the ones I love. I'm feeling very TS Anti-Hero because looking back, I'm the main factor. Did I not try hard enough? Was I too harsh? Have my standards always been held too high?

I feel like my standards have to be when you spend your entire life getting bullied. I feel like I can't trust anyone. And once they prove to me that I can't or they let me down, I run.

SO I have commitment issues, FUCKING SUE ME THEN. You always talked about how you hate how people can't communicate but you didn't communicate to others how you wanted to be communicated to either.

I've never been my best friend's best friend. So I feel like it's justified when I leave. I'm sorry for ranting while I procrastinate my English paper.

Don't you dare think I just didn't care about you. I wish you knew the truth. I can hope and wish on every star all I want. I don't think you're coming back into my life. Not in the same way, not any day soon.

I still love you. And I miss you dearly, my once in a lifetime.

Sincerely your-probably-definitely-no-longer-best-and-maybe-not-even- a- kinda-friend,

Angelina

[devildomdisaster]

Idk if you read Lore Olympus but chapter 129 gave me an angsty request idea.

So Persephone, who’s the goddess of spring, goes into a hibernation-like state and when her emotions go out of control, she ends up growing her hair really long and her body sprouts a lot of plants from her; to the point of covering her and whatever area she’s in with her plants.

So I would like to request head cannons of the Brothers reacting to an MC who gets really sad whenever the brothers insult or threaten them and after several weeks of being berated by demons it causes MC to shut down and go to their room but mistakes a comfort spell with a plant curse that causes their hair and plants to grow continuously long. The plants fill up MC’s room and while they would normally be surprised at the mistake, they don’t care any more. They allow the plants to to grow, even wrap around their neck and body, and hopes the curse kills them off before the brothers notice as they go in the “hibernation” stage of the curse (The curse causes the victim to grow a lot of plants and vines from their body until they die, which can take a few days).

I’m sorry for being so long and descriptive, I just wanna see the Bros panic and feel guilty that MC felt pushed to do this to themselves but I understand if you don’t want to do it

I don't read Lore Olympus but you described the situation really well so I hope this is something close to what you wanted.

Comfort spell gone wrong

Lately, nothing seemed to be good enough for the demons. No matter what you did one of them would find something to berate you for.

“Mc, your grades are subpar even for an exchange student. You’ll have to try harder in order to not be a disappointment to Diavolo and myself.” Lucifer warned over breakfast.

“Mc, you burned dinner. You should learn to be a better cook.” Beel grumbled. As if you had ever seen any of these ingredients before ending up in the Devildom.

Even Mammon seemed to be in a particularly unpleasant mood. A never-ending string of complaints about how hard it is to protect an ordinary human. “Geez, you’re such a hassle human.”

Taking refuge in the library to study and to give Mammon a break from you proved disastrous and nearly deadly. Somehow you’d managed to spill your cup of tea all over an old somewhat rare text after Asmo had barged in and startled you. Your string of bad luck continued when Satan rounded the corner and saw the soggy tea-stained pages you’d been trying to decipher. In his fit of rage, he’d called you several unpleasant names and asked if you were “capable of doing anything right or if all humans are as stupid as you?” You’d left as quickly as you were able to avoid any more of his wrath.

No matter where you went you kept walking in on Belphie napping and without fail he’d say something nasty to you, that would make tears burn the backs of your eyes.

Levi had angrily called you a “useless normie,” who he wished would “never come back.” and had pushed you from his room with a slam of his door.

Even Asmo who usually just ignored you when he was upset found every reason imaginable to critique your every aspect. Physical and personality. Not a single one of which made you feel any more than worthless.

So was it any wonder when at the end of a long week you’d locked yourself in your room and decided to try that comfort spell you’d heard Solomon talking about? It seemed simple enough. But then your tears had blurred your vision as you’d recited the words and your Latin was still shaky at best. But it was just a few lines! And there was no way you were going to go to one of the brothers for comfort when they had seemed perfectly happy to make you miserable for the last few weeks.

You’d read the spell aloud and curled up hoping that the spell would kick in and you’d feel even just the slightest bit better. The blinding green light and sudden drop in energy was the first and only warning the spell had gone wrong. But being new to magic meant it still sapped your energy, so you didn’t stop to think something might be wrong. By the time you realized what was happening, everything was out of control. Plants had begun to sprout from your skin and the floor around you, growing and growing. With each inch they grew you felt your exhaustion creep up and consume you. You were just so tired. Your eyes fluttered closed. This was wrong! You forced your eyes open again. You need to fix this. The spell! But a short nap wouldn’t hurt, would it? You’d have more energy after you woke up. Then you could go get one of the brothers. Satan would know how to fix this. Or Lucifer! He’d clean the spell up easily. Yes, after you woke up…

Lucifer hadn’t seen you all weekend. He figures you’re most likely studying. But you don’t show up for meals and none of his brothers have seen you either… and oh Diavolo! He can feel the spell from the dining room. How did he not notice sooner? The cold pulling sensation of the spell, like it was sucking the warmth and life from its surroundings.

When Lucifer reaches your door Mammon is already there. Knocking and shouting for you, but there's no answer. He all but breaks your door down, his brothers behind him, and finds you at the center of the spell. Unresponsive and covered in the plants using your energy to grow. The plants had begun climbing up the walls and twisting through your hair, sending out snow-white flowers.

“Beel! Don’t!” Lucifer warns as Beel reaches out to pull a handful of plants from you. “We don’t know what did this and what will happen to Mc if we just rip the spell off like that.”

“Lucifer, Mc did this to themself,” Satan points to the open spellbook. “It looks like they got a comfort spell mixed up.”

Fortunately, your last tired thoughts were correct and Lucifer is able to break the spell quickly. You wake surrounded by the brothers.

Lucifer:

All this happened for a comfort spell? Because you didn’t feel like you could come to him, to any of them?

He’s so sorry Mc. Enough that as he leans down to pick you up out of the mess of withering plants you can feel tears fall onto your face.

“Nothing I did was good enough for you Lucifer. Any of you. I just wanted to feel… I just wanted-”

His heart breaks when he realizes this is his brother’s fault, his fault. “You are always good enough, Mc. Much more than I could ever ask you to be, and if I ever made you feel like you weren't. No, the fact that I made you feel like you weren’t, means I have been truly terrible.”

You’re choking back your own tears now and you curl further into his arms as he carries you down the hall. “You said I was a disappointment.”

“My dear Mc, you have never been, nor could you ever be a disappointment to me. Forgive me for ever making you feel as if you were.”

Lucifer takes you to his bathroom and draws you a bath to wash away the last of the plant matter from your body.

Afterward, he’ll bring you anything you ask for. He wants to wrap you in his arms but doesn’t want to push you, so he asks softly if he can hold you.

He’ll spend weeks trying to make this up to you, even after you forgive him, he’ll be sure to tell you how much he loves you more often than he did before.

Mammon:

Shit human! Why didn’t you come to him? He loves you so much and oh. He made you feel like a burden.

How could he be so stupid when he knows how his brothers make him feel?

Mammon begs for your forgiveness in front of all his brothers.

“Please can ya forgive me? I never meant to make ya feel like a burden. You're the only human I- I want to protect you Mc. I’m so sorry.”

Mammon helps you up and since your room is covered in plants he offers to let you sleep in his room for the night.

He wraps you in blankets and brushes the hair from your face with trembling fingertips.

There are still a few stubborn leaves sticking to your face and in your hair so Mammon takes a warm washcloth and wipes them from your face before gently untangling the plants from your hair.

You’ll be getting little gifts and tokens of mammon’s affections for the foreseeable future.

Levi:

He threw you out of his room when you came to him for comfort and the guilt at seeing you almost die because of it is eating him alive.

He feels frozen

Maybe you would be better off without an otaku shut-in like him. He starts avoiding you like the plague.

You start to think that Levi is so disgusted with the fact that you did that spell that he doesn’t want anything to do with you anymore.

Despite this Levi still checks up on you. He wants to know that you are ok, he just does it without you knowing.

He’ll ask his brothers about you and discreetly glance at you during meals to make sure you’re eating enough and look healthy.

A few days later when your favorite and manga anime start showing up outside your door you confront Levi. “Are you mad at me? Do you just not want to be around me after what happened? Levi, I miss you!”

He is shook, and he can’t believe he messed up so badly.

He’s happy that he can invite you to hang out again, and he makes sure to spend long nights gaming or watching movies with you until you fall asleep against him. He’ll even stutter out how much he treasures his time with you, blushing fiercely all the while.

Satan:

Satan feels anger swell up inside him. How could he have let this happen? How could no one have seen how upset you were?

Once the spell has been dissolved he is at your side instantly. Brushing vines from your skin. His fingers are shaking in anger but his touch is so gentle.

When both you and your room are cleaned up Satan sits at your bedside, book in hand, reading to you.

He just wants to be close to you now. He wants you to know how much he cares about you but is still too worked up to get his thoughts out properly.

Eventually, his thoughts calm and he stops reading in the middle of a sentence. “Mc, I am so sorry. I never meant to make you feel unwanted. Every day I spend with you is infinitely better than a day without you. I know the spell was a mistake but… we almost lost you. I almost lost you.”

He wants to talk about what pushed you to do this. He won’t push but he really does think that he will be better able to help you if he understands.

Satan makes sure to spend more time with you from now on. He makes a conscious effort to check his temper at the door and be with you when you need him.

Sometimes he’ll just read to you until one of you confides in the other in quiet voices.

Asmo:

As you blink your eyes open Asmo gently brushes some plants from your cheek.

You are so pale and his heart breaks as you flinch away from him. You feel like a mess and you know you must look like one too so curl your body away from him trying to hide. Trying to avoid his critical gaze.

This is the moment Asmo knows he screwed up.

He draws his hand back, for a moment, before reaching out to you again. Cupping your cheek and wiping your tears away with perfectly manicured hands.

Lucifer has him take you to his bathroom to clean up while the rest of the brothers work to clear the plants from your room.

Asmo is quiet for a long while as he untangles plants from your hair.

“You’re so loved, Mc,” he says softly. “You are.” he insists when you shake your head no.

“More than you could ever know, and it’s our fault for not telling you. My fault for not making you feel worthy.”

After this incident, Asmo wants to make sure you know how beautiful you are. He starts self-care days once a week that soon turn into whole family affairs. Each week different combinations of his brother attend and you all work to pamper each other.

Asmo makes sure nothing like this happens again, he never wants to be part of the reason you feel unloved ever again.

Beel:

At first, Beel thinks you did this on purpose. Once the brothers realize you messed up the spell he is less angry but no less distraught.

Once you wake up, he wants to take you to get desserts. He’s heard humans eat Chocolate/ other sweets to feel better. And this makes sense to him, food does make everything better.

But you don’t want to go to Madam Screams or the kitchen to make your own. You’re still so tired. Not to mention embarrassed that you screwed the spell up this bad.

And now they are all staring at you like they care so much when none of them had any time to notice how they were making you feel before.

When you become unresponsive to the brother’s questions and apologies Beel scoops you up in his arms and walks away with you.

Something about the way he holds you close to his chest and his warmth causes you to finally let go.

You bury your face in his shirt to muffle your crying.

“I just… I felt so alone! And… I...but no one” you gasp out shakily between sobs.

Beel soothes you with soft murmuring as he gently cards his fingers through your hair and strokes down your back.

Once your crying quiets he starts to speak “Don’t do that again. You can always come to me Mc. I’m so sorry you felt like you couldn’t”

Belphie:

Belphie thinks it’s a joke at first. “Man, how could they mess up this bad?”

Then he sees Lucifer’s panicked expression and it hits him how serious this is.

Belphie is immediately by your side. Hands frantically feeling your wrist for a pulse.

After Lucifer breaks the spell and your eyes flutter open Belphie is filled with relief until a wave of guilt washes through him.

He can’t believe he fucked up so badly again. Sure this time he didn’t directly cause you physical harm, but he did play a role in causing you to almost die again.

“I am so very sorry Mc, I never meant to hurt you.”

He does everything he can think of to make it up to you. Anything you ask him for, as long as it’s within his power, is yours. No questions asked.

He asks permission just to hold your hand for weeks afterward as if he thinks you’ll come to your senses and decide you don’t want anything to do with him.

He wants to comfort you so bad.

To make sure you don’t feel like this again Belphie pulls you away to nap with him as often as he can get away with it. Most likely only a few times a week (much less often than he would like). Sometimes he uses this time just to talk with you. Others you really do nap, and Belphie curls himself around you. Occasionally he enters your dreams while you nap together to make sure no nightmares can touch you.

[ibuki-loves-you]

You open? If so, can I ask for the protagonists catching the reader S@lfh*rm? I'm kinda in the mood for comfort. Its ok if you don't wanna do this!

Hajime, Shuichi, and Kaede finding their S/O self harming

Warnings: Self harm, gender neutral

Mod Ibuki: Enjoy! Hope you're okay!

Hajime Hinata:

Hajime was beyond confused. He had zero idea what to do. He didn't know whether to run and get a first aid kit, hug you, or get someone more experienced.

He finally decided to give you a hug first. A tight, careful hug. He didn’t wanna hurt you anymore than you already were but he needed to know that you are there and alive and your heart is beating.

“Why.”

That was all he asked. Just why. When you told him, he lost it. He wasn’t angry but he raised his voice. He was just scared, so scared of losing you.

“That’s not true! Not remotely! Why would you think that!?”

When Hajime saw your reaction to his yelling he immediately toned it down and apologized, hugging you again and comforting you after his little outburst. This is what happens when he’s scared, and he knows he’s got to fix it. He feels bad because he lost it for a second when you least needed it.

After comforting you for a bit, he grabbed a first aid kit and began bandaging you up. Mikan taught everyone first aid basics, so he kinda knew what he was doing. Enough to patch you up and make sure your wounds are clean.

Afterwards, he got a blanket and wrapped you and him in it. On the bathroom floor. He wanted to talk. Almost like a therapy session. He wanted you to vent for as long as you needed to. Just get everything out, you know?

“I want you to know I love and care for you. I hate seeing you hurt and this broke me. I love you too much to stand by and watch you suffer. So please come to me from now on. I’m here for you.”

Shuichi Saihara:

Shuichi cried as soon as he saw you. He ran straight for you and held you, petting your hair and sobbing. He was always so sensitive to death and injury, seeing it on his lover made him instantly break down.

“B-Baby…why honey why.” “I-I’m hurting, Shu.” “I know baby, I’m s-so sorry.”

After a long hug he got a first aid kit and began wrapping your wounds, making sure they were clean and won’t get infected. Tears were still falling down his cheeks, one landing on the bandage. When he saw the tear stain, it made him start sobbing all over again. Luckily, he was almost done, so he finished quickly and hugged you close again.

Shuichi asked you to talk to him. Tell him everything you’ve been feeling. Why you did this, what led to it, etc. It was almost like an interview. He just cares so much, he needs to know everything that was going through your head so he can piece together how to help you.

Once you told him how you were really feeling, everything hit him hard. So that’s why you’ve been a bit off. Maybe if he said something this wouldn’t have happened. Maybe if he gave you a hug that day in the restaurant. Maybe if he-

No, he needs to stop overthinking. This is about you. You need him right now.

“Baby, I promise you. You aren’t a burden, or a negative person. You are the light of my life. You make me so happy. You make the world a brighter place for me. So please, hold on for me.”

Kaede Akamatsu:

Kaede froze. She needed to process what was going on in front of her. It didn’t hit her that you, her love, had hurt themselves purposely.

“My love…?”

Her voice was barely above a whisper. It was when you shakily lifted your arms for a hug that she snapped out of it and ran to hold you. She hummed and rocked you back and forth while you cried, calming you down.

Kaede didn’t wanna pull away, but she had to clean your wounds. She slowly backed up and reached for a first aid kit to begin patching you up. She didn’t know anything about first aid, so you and her watched a Youtube video on how to properly patch someone up while she followed along. When she finished, she wanted you to talk to her about what happened. What caused this pain?

“What happened, honey? Please tell me.”

While Kaede was rocking you, you were stumbling on your words and venting to her. But she understood. She caught what you were saying and the parts she didn’t, she didn’t ask for you to repeat. She knew this was hard enough as is, you didn’t need any more stress.

She was frowning into your shoulder when you finished. You really felt like that…? Kaede didn’t know what to say except positive things. About you. Your looks. Your shining personality. How wonderful you treated her.

“I promise you! You are amazing, baby! No really! You are! You’re my sunshineee, my only sunshineee, you make me happyyyy, when skies are greyyyy. Hehe, you’re a beautiful person lovey. I love you.