#this morning I have been thinking about Bellara

[seaglassmelody]

Things the Dragon Age fandom is arguing about: The use of "nonbinary" in a fantasy setting. The existence of ideas that wound up on the cutting room floor. The "quality of the writing" based on weird metrics like "how much explicit slavery does the audience need to be shown"

Things I WISH the Dragon Age fandom was arguing about: Is it better to free the archive or let Bellara keep it? What is the line between being trapped by the past and the importance of knowledge? Is it better to have the elves forge a new identity with the world they've created for themselves or have more context for their culture and bring some of their lost traditions back?

[cy-cyborg]

It's been confirmed that there are 3 amputees in the main cast of Dragon Age: the veilguard - Neve (leg amputee), Bellara (arm amputee) and your inquisitor (arm amputee). So as an amputee myself, here are some things I'd like to see.

Note: these aren't predictions, just things I'd really like to be included.

The inquisitor doesn't use a prosthetic (I already talked about this in its own post but with 3 amputees, and 2 of them already being shown to use prosthetics that, lets be honest, do look like "perfect replacement" prosthetics, it would be nice to see at least one who doesn't)

We will get to customise our inquisitor in chatacter creation, so I would love, if they do use a prosthetic, for there to be some customisability to it (im not holding my breath there but still).

Neve and Bellara's prosthetics aren't perfect prosthetics, and they are actually acknowledged as being disabled while still being active members of your party.

There's some kind of party banter between Neve and Bellara about some of the downsides/problems with their prosthetics, not necessarily in a "poor them" way, but in a "ugh, don't you just hate it when you can't get the stupid thing on in the morning" kind of way.

I get a kind of jokey/adventurous vibe from Bellara, I hope they aren't affraid to let her use her prosthetic for pranks or jokes. I don't think neve would, but I can see bellara having a blast with it.

I hope the prosthetics come off during down time. No amputee wears their prosthetics 24/7, it's uncomfortable, and they get heavy and sore after using them all day.

I hope we see Neve express some frustration or see her alter her walk animation on rough terrain. It's hard to get a clear look because the trailers she's been shown in are so dark, but her foot doesn't look articulated, which is going to change how she walks, even just a little bit.

I hope the prosthetics don't break - this is a trope I'm starting to notice more and more, where someone has a perfect prosthetic that is only not a perfect replacement when it breaks, usually for plot reasons, at which point the character in question is forced out of the action until its fixed. DA has forced companions out of your party for story reasons before (e.g. solas after you free his spirit friend and he needs to cool off) so I can see this being used for plot, and I really hope it's not.

The inquisitor, Neve and Bellara compair prosthetists (the maker of the prosthetic) and maker techniques.

I really doubt they'll do this but I'd love it if random NPC's approach you if you have any of the amputees in your party to ask what happened and/or make weird comments at them ("but cy, that would be so annoying and inconvenient!" That's the point. So many people do that to irl amputees, and it's never at a convenient or even safe time, and I've never seen it happen in media. A game is arguably the best place to have it happen, in, say, a random event similar to the ones that could happen in origins)

In that same vein, I'd love to see a scene where someone approaches the inquisitor to call them an inspiration- you and the inquisitor assume it's for, you know, beating corripheus (I know I spelled it wrong lol) and saving the world, but it's revealed the chatacter has no idea who the hell the inquisitor is and just means it's inspiring that they're out in public "like that" - referring to their arm. This also happens to me all the time, and you can't tell me some snooty orlesean or tevinter noble wouldn't make those back-handed compliments, lol. You also can't convince me that any version of the inquisitor would just accept that

I hope none of the chatacters are used as inspiration porn ("don't you worry Rook! I can still pull my own weight on the team despite being an amputee, you just have to give me a chance to prove myself!")

At least one of the chatacter's stories of how they lost their limb is left untold in game (we don't always need to know how it happened if it's not relevent to the plot).

Like I said, these aren't predictions, just my hopes. I wouldn't hold my breath for any of these to be honest (bioware has not been the best in term of disability rep in the past) but A lot of them wouldn't be hard to implement and could take the representation from hardly even acknowledging their disability to something actually pretty decent disability rep-wise. It's also pretty rare to have so many characters with the same kind of disability in the cast of such a mainstream piece of media, and I really, really hope they do something with that because you can have a lot of fun with that.

[blindvogel]

We know very little about the time Rook is stuck in Fade prison. Only that it is weeks and that the team crafts the fake dagger in the meantime. We never really learn what everyone feels or how they find Rook in the end. I think it is called the Lighthouse for a reason. So. Part two. Emmrich.

~~~

Its shape the absence of you (Part 2 of 3)

The memory has burned itself into his mind, plays on repeat every time he closes his eyes. Kamari, right in front of him, just a couple of steps away. Falling forward, reaching for the dagger in Ghilan’nain’s chest, he’d called to her to pull it out. And then she is gone. Just like that. Swept into the greater Fade with not even a trace for him to find. 

Other details are hazy. Davrin bodily dragging him away, down to the beach. The heat of the fire as Elgar'nan’s rage consumed the island. The silence of the Lighthouse.

When Emmrich opens his eyes the morning after there is a heavy weight sitting on his chest. Its shape the absence of her. 

She pins him down, like a butterfly in a box or a flower pressed between pages. 

This weight, it is seeing her face as it twists in anger and pain. Pain he caused her because he is a coward. It is the shake in her voice as she tries to stop him from breaking something beyond repair. Because he is a coward. It is the knowledge that the last memory he has of her will be this because he let his fear win. 

He’d been so afraid of the possibility that she would leave him in some nebulous made-up future, so afraid of causing her pain with his own death should she stay, against all odds. So scared of the what-ifs and the maybes. Of his own feelings. 

And nothing of this matters if he’s lost her. Just like this. Before he could repair what he had broken, before he had the chance to say how truly sorry he is. How much he needs her. How much it scares him if she should not feel the same way. 

Except- she does. Did. He simply had been too scared and too stubborn to believe it until it was almost too late. Is too late now. 

Emmrich is no stranger to loss and grief, to regrets. He has learned to carry them and not break, but he can feel the cracks. The rituals, the habits that he has picked up and created for himself after he joined the Mourn Watch have supported him through the darkest days. They do so now too even if it is a struggle. A clean shave, the proper dress, every piece of jewelry is a piece of stability, of armor against the pain. 

He has days where this works, where he can be a functioning member of the team. Go over news from Minrathous, work on theories and ideas how to stop Elgar’nan without the dagger - how to make one. 

It’s an idea that first sparks hope - trying to find Kamari in the vastness of the Fade by his usual means had yielded nothing, not even the smallest trace of her. But with the dagger they might be able to do something. 

He latches onto that idea, to that work like a lifeline. He spends days working out the details, the composition and crafting methods, and manages to procure the materials. He works on it feverishly, painstakingly. Yet when it is finished it is nothing but a bauble, a mere trinket, and not his salvation. 

Emmrich also has bad days. They all do. Kamari was not the only one that did not make it off the island. They lost Harding, Bellara. Both Taash and Neve take it hard, and he tries to be there for them with an open ear - he is a Watcher, it is part of his duty after all. 

But it is hard on the bad days, when he wakes up with the memory of her on his mind and that weight on his chest, when nothing he does can ease it. 

Then all he can do is sit in her room, one of her journals in his lap. She’d shown them to him once, her thoughts and feelings committed to paper, interspersed with pressed flowers she’d found on her travels with Varric. Emmrich knows there are also her thoughts on him in there - but he is still too much of a coward to read them. The page is marked with a Shroud’s Kiss. 

He also has not informed Myrna or Vorgoth. He knows he must, eventually, as is his duty. But it would be so final to put it to paper, like dousing the last flame of hope he keeps alive in his heart. 

It had been bad enough trying to explain it to Manfred when he had turned to him and simply asked, “Kamari?” 

“She is gone, Manfred. We’ve lost her to the greater Fade and I’m afraid it will not be as easy to bring her back.”

“Alive!”

“Oh I hope so, my boy.”

Then he had sent him out on an errand so Manfred would not see him cry.

It is a bad day when he finally opens the journal to the page with the pressed white flower - her favorite non-color as she had teased him after his little pedantic outburst during their date. White like fresh snow. The moon. Kamari, in an Old Nevarran dialect. The only thing she had ever received from her parents. He’d felt foolish then but she had just waved it away with a laugh, with such grace. 

Now his fingers tremble as he lifts the flower so he can read the words below.

I’m glad Manfred is back. It will make many things so much easier for Emmrich. He doesn’t really want to admit it, perhaps not even to himself, but he’s felt lonely without him. Without his family, his son. He waved it off when I suggested as much but it’s so clear to see. 

With Manfred back it’s going to be easier to convince Emmrich that he is braver than he gives himself credit for. That his fears are not everything, will not consume him. With time, he’ll see what I see. A wonderful, kind, loving man that has faced so many things thrown at him and not wavered in who he is. 

The strength of that conviction, that we must believe in kindness - it’s what gives me hope that we will get through this. It’s what I love about him.

The first tear falls onto the back of his hand and he quickly closes the journal, not wanting to smudge her words and lose this last thing he has of her. The reason he cannot give up hope. 

He cries himself to sleep on her couch that night, the journal pressed tightly to his chest. 

When Emmrich wakes in the early hours of the morning with a pounding headache and his heart heavy, it is to the sight of the Caretaker hovering in front of him. 

“A new path has opened, dweller. The Lighthouse will show the way as it has always done. A beacon to the lost.”

Then they disappear before he can ask any further questions. 

Emmrich stumbles to his feet and out of the room, out into the Library where there is a door that has not been there before. It leads to a spiraling corridor ushering him up and up and up, until he arrives at what must be the very top of the Lighthouse. Gemstone windows encircle the entire room, shimmering in every visible color and some that can only be felt. And in the middle of the room a light, warm and bright and a doorway beyond. 

His senses reach out to it, through it. It is as if he has become a lighthouse, his searching gaze traversing the Fade farther and faster. Somewhere, she is out there somewhere, he can feel it. 

He doesn’t know how long he stands there. Eventually there are Neve, Lucanis, Taash at his back. Asking questions, bickering. Still he searches, unwavering, until- 

“There, a light!”

“We’ve got something?!”

Emmrich reaches into, through the doorway. His fingers wrap around a wrist, his other hand finds the upper arm. Then Taash and Lucanis are beside him, reaching and pulling until there is no more resistance. Until she stumbles out of the Fade and into their arms. Whole. Alive.

Then Kamari pulls away, stumbles back with her hands raised, her breathing shallow, her eyes pressed shut. “Please. A moment.” 

Neve is faster. “What’s wrong?”

It takes Kamari a moment to answer. He can see her deliberately drawing breath, using a technique every initiate learns to deal with panic and pain to calm herself. His heart twists. 

“Too many sensations at once. Too bright, too loud, too much. I can feel… everything.” 

Then she opens her eyes and her gaze finds his, and for a moment he forgets how to breathe. What he sees there, a moonrise.

[thewardenisonthecase]

Early Morning

Lucanis Dellamorte x Grey Warden!Rook

Part two of Rest Easy

Read on AO3

Summary: The one in which everyone knows.

A/N: Small bonus chapter.

Bellara had woken up quite early, even if she had gone to sleep late, staying awake most of the night reading her serials. 

The downside of that was that her mind was quite foggy in the morning, and considering she had a full day ahead of her, she needed to clear her head. 

And what better way, she thought, than a nice cup of coffee. 

Slowly, she made her way to the kitchen. Lucanis never slept, which meant he would probably have some spare coffee to give her. Or maybe even brew a new one for her, as he often did. 

However, when Bellara entered the kitchen, she was surprised to see Lucanis wasn’t there. She called out his name but received no reply. 

Had by some miracle Lucanis slept through the night? Or worse, had Spite escaped with him? What if he was lost somewhere? 

Thoughts like these began to infiltrate Bellara’s mind when she heard snoring coming from the pantry. Instinctively, she decided to go check in there. Although it probably meant that Lucanis was asleep, she just wanted to make sure her friend was doing alright (and to reassure her anxious mind). 

She quietly opened a bit of the door, enough to take a peak, and as soon as she did, she had to stop herself from gasping. 

Lucanis was asleep…and on top of him was Rook. They were holding each other quite strongly, like one would grab a pillow when dreaming, not wanting to let go. 

Bellara couldn’t help but think this was just like her romance novels. For some time, she had noticed how Lucanis and Rook had been spending more and more time together. The stolen glances, the sighs. One night, when Rook was more intoxicated than usual, she had even confessed to Bellara about having a crush on him, but thinking it wouldn’t lead anywhere. She felt the same as she did when she read those romance novels in which the couple took too long to get together, internally screaming ‘just kiss him’ whenever she saw the two of them around the Lighthouse making eyes at each other. 

Now, Bellara felt like she was reading the conclusion to the story, when  the protagonists finally admitted their love and spent the night together. 

‘Wait, no, don’t think about that about your friends, Bellara.’ She thought. ‘I should go before one of them wakes up.’ 

She carefully took a step back, closing the door with the utmost caution. She sighed in relief, until she heard a voice behind her. 

“Don’t think about what?” Harding had asked. 

“Oh, Lace! I-I didn’t see you there.” Bellara said nervously, realizing she had spoken out loud.  “What are you doing here, it’s so early.” 

Harding raised a brow. “This is the time I usually wake up to drink coffee.” She pointed towards the door. “Is Lucanis inside, I need-”

“No!” Bellara shouted, barring the door. “I mean, uh, he can’t do coffee right now.” 

At that moment, Neve walked into the kitchen, having heard what Bellara said. 

“Why? Is he sick?” She crossed her arms. “And why are you standing like that over the door?” 

Bellara began to sweat in panic. “No, he’s just…he well, uhm, he asked me, to-to not let anyone in. He didn’t want to be bothered this early.” 

“Truly?” Neve said, a brow raised in disbelief. “I remember Lucanis usually being very awake at this hour.” 

“Well, he-he told me he wanted to sleep in today.” 

Harding’s eyes widened. “This truly is the weirdest time to be alive.” 

Neve gave Bellara a sympathetic look. “Look, Bel, you’re a great friend, so I say this with no malice. You’re a terrible liar.” 

Bellara sighed. 

“Why are we hanging out in the kitchen?” Taash said, as they too entered. 

“We, uh,-” 

“Bellara, dear, is everything alright there? You seem quite distressed.” Emmrich asked her, having followed behind Taash. 

“Professor! Everything’s good, I just-”

“Has anyone seen Rook?” Finally, Davrin walked in and Bellara lost it. 

“THEY’RE IN THE PANTRY!” Bellara shouted. “Lucanis and Rook are sleeping in the pantry!” 

Silence befell the kitchen as everyone stared at Bellara. 

“What?!” Davrin asked in disbelief.

“Oh my…” Emmrich covered his mouth with his hand. 

“So that’s why you were acting weird.” Neve said

“When you say sleeping…”  Taash began “do you mean-”

“Like Rook on top of Lucanis. The two holding each other like teddy bears.” Bellara said hurriedly. 

“They were definitely doing it.” 

“Taash!” Harding reprimanded. “Not everything is sex.”

“But it sounds like it!” They defended themselves. “I mean-”

Before they could continue, the door to the pantry swung open, and an angry Rook looked at all of them.

“Can you all keep it quiet?! Some of us are trying to sleep.” 

The door to the pantry closed with a bang, and the sound of a key being turned was heard as all hell broke loose in the kitchen. 

Rook sighed, turning to Lucanis, who had a tired smile on his lips. “I think they all know about us now.” 

“It was bound to happen.” 

She flicked her wrist, casting a silencing spell on the door, to cut off the noise of the banging and shouting from the other side. She walked towards him, sitting on the bed. “You do know that means they’ll talk, right?” 

He shrugged. “Let them. As long as I have you with me, I do not mind.” 

Rook smirked. “Charmer.” She gave him a small and quick peck on his cheek before saying. “Now lay down again. I have a week’s worth of sleep to make up.”

He chuckled, resuming the position they were in. “As you wish.”

[t00tsmcgee]

Rook as a Companion Banter Episode two: Bellara

Part 1 (Neve) | Part 2 (Bellara) | Part 3 (Davrin) | Part 4 (Harding) | Part 5 (Taash) | Part 6 (Emmrich) | Part 7 (Lucanis) |

Banter written with my Rook in mind <- Link to his own post if you want to read more about him!

-

Bellara: “You seem sad, Calais.” Calais: “Just Cal is fine, Bellara.” Bellara: “Oh, right. You seem sad, Cal.” Calais: “Yeah.” Bellara: “Is it because of everything that’s happening?” Calais: “It’s not the only reason, but it doesn’t help.” Bellara: “When I was sad Cyrian always asked me silly questions to cheer me up. Like, what happens if you get scared half to death twice?” Calais: “You know, he was on to something there.” Bellara: *chuckle*

Bellara: “Is it true cannibals don’t eat clowns because they taste funny?” Calais: *laughing* “Ugh!”

Calais: “Why aren’t blueberries blue?” Bellara: “They are! In a certain light anyway.” Calais: “Bella.” Bellara: “Oh, were you doing the silly question thing?” Calais: “Trying to anyway. Not very successfully judging by your reaction.” Bellara: “Yeah, still needs work. But you’ll get there.”

Calais: “Are the good things that come to those who wait the leftovers of those who didn’t wait?” Bellara: “Wow, that one’s deep.”

Calais: “If a fork was made of gold would it still be considered silverware?” Bellara: “I think you’d just call it cutlery.” Calais: “You’re really cramping my style.” Bellara: *laughing*

Calais: “Why does it take 10 minutes to cook rice?” Bellara: “Does it? I thought it took at least 15!” Lucanis: *disgusted noise* “This explains so much about that risotto you made the other day.”

Bellara: “Why is it called a pair of pants, when there’s only one bit of clothing involved?” Calais: “That’s what I’ve been saying!”

Calais: “I’m sorry about your brother, Bella.” Bellara: “Yeah, me too.” Calais: “We’ll find a way to help him. I know we will.” Bellara: “I hope you’re right.”

Calais: “If you tied buttered toast to a cat and dropped it, what would happen?” Bellara: “You’d never do that to a cat.” Calais: “No, you’re right. I’m just upset my buttered toast dropped this morning.” Bellara: “It was a heavy blow for us all.” Calais: “I might never recover.”

Bellara: “What was it like, growing up in the Necropolis?” Calais: “It was idyllic, I suppose. Vorgoth did the best he could to raise me as normally as possible. But my gift set me apart. It was hard to make friends.” Bellara: “Why?” Calais: “When you can peer into the veil and speak with spirits as if they were standing next to you, it gives you a leg up in a place like that.” Bellara: “Oh, leg, because of your leg thing?” Calais: “No, leg because that’s the turn of phrase.” Bellara: “Is it? Oh, right. I got them mixed up again. Sorry, I didn’t mean to be insensitive.” Calais: “That’s alright, you weren’t.” Bellara: “Does it hurt? Your leg?” Calais: “Yeah, all the time. Every day.” Bellara: “How do you cope with it?” Calais: “I have salves, and an elfroot tea that helps. Tastes like ass though.” Bellara: “Could you get a brace made, to help with the pain and the walking?” Calais: “I had one made, but I never wear it. The thing is more uncomfortable than the pain my leg causes me anyway.”

Bellara: “I heard you play piano the other night, in your room.” Calais: “And here I was, thinking I had a nice moment to myself.” Bellara: “You're very good. I stood and listened until you stopped playing.” Calais: “Thank you. And yeah, I fell asleep eventually.” Bellara: “You play until you fall asleep?” Calais: “On hard days.”

Bellara: “Will you play piano for me some time?” Calais: “I don’t do well with an audience.” Bellara: *deflated* “Oh..” Calais: “But, for you, I’ll try.” Bellara: *excited gasp* “Thank you!”

Bellara: *Humming song* Calais: *chuckling* “Liked that one, did you?” Bellara: “Oh, yes! You’re a very good piano player, and that song was so catchy. I keep hearing it in my head.” Rook: “Now I’m curious.” Bellara: “Cal played me a few songs last night, to help me get to sleep. But they were so good they kept me awake because I wanted to listen to them.” Calais: “Yeah, missed the mark on that.” Rook: “But it seems you’ve found a captive audience at least.” Calais: *chuckles* “Yeah. Who knows, maybe I’ll play in front of the team at some point.” Bellara: *excited noises* Calais: “No promises!”

[uniquelyuninspired]

Early Morning Wonderings - Nevellara ficlet

@littlemortalme oops, I did it!

Based on littlemortalme's comments about that one Nevellara banter happening instead at 3AM when they're both naked.

• • • • • •

Neve wasn’t entirely surprised to learn that Bellara was awake — given how neither of them tended to ever get much sleep — yet it had been just quiet enough, with very little restless movement shifting the bed, that she had figured that she had at least been tired enough to be close to falling asleep. She was surprised by the sudden ring of her voice through the room, posing a question, at a volume too loud for the otherwise quiet that enveloped the earliest hours of the morning; though somehow the startling, sudden noise wasn’t even the most shocking thing.

It was the question itself.

“Do you ever wonder what the fade smells like to a squirrel?”

Neve’s response was immediate. “No.”

It was then that she felt the bed shift with the elven woman’s movement, a knee knocking lightly into her hip where she sat near the edge of the bed with a few carefully chosen pages spread out before her. She sighed when her overly exerted brain clung on to the question anyway, the faintest trickle of curiosity breaking through her focus to urge her into wondering if the fade did indeed smell different to animals, especially the sections that tailored its smell to the wanderer. I must be more exhausted than normal, she thought as she gathered her notes quickly and set them aside, knowing that could be the only reason behind such an odd question sparking genuine wonder in her.

Shifting toward the middle of the bed, Neve pushed herself up enough to toss her leg over Bellara’s body as she finished turning to face her, settling her body down on the younger woman’s hips. She noted the way a smile instantly appeared to brighten Bellara’s features as she leaned her upper-body down over Bellara, placing her hand against the mattress beside her head for balance; and she tried desperately to ignore the way her chest almost seemed to flutter with the knowledge that she was somehow the one capable of coaxing such a sweet smile from someone like Bellara.

“You know,” Neve began, voice barely more than a whisper – much more appropriate for the time of night – as she let her other hand slide slowly up Bellara’s abdomen, “you are quite maddening sometimes.”

“I’m sorry! I don’t mean to be!” Bellara replied quickly, seemingly focusing more on the words themselves than the way that Neve had said them — which was typical of her. “I just think out loud sometimes, but I can definitely try not to if you — .”

“Bel?” Neve said softly, interrupting her. When all Bellara did was hum and look up at her with those large, beautiful eyes, she lifted the hand not being used for balance up to caress Bellara’s cheek as she continued, “You don’t have to apologize, I didn’t mean it literally.”

“Oh!” Bellara’s eyes widened, expressing her bewilderment. “Then, how did you mean it?”

Neve let one corner of her mouth quirk upward as she leaned further down, bringing her lips to brush over Bellara’s ear as she answered. “I meant… that you drive me crazy.”

Bellara giggled, as she always did when Neve whispered to her in this way, her hands coming up to grip at Neve’s waist, fingertips digging lightly as they danced over her spine. “But isn’t that a ba — ?”

Once again, Neve interrupted her; this time, however, she did it by sealing her lips over Bellara’s when they were slightly parted, swallowing the rest of her words instead of letting them form and replacing them with her tongue, hoping that her kiss erased any doubt in Bellara’s mind that the way in which she drove her insane was any sort of unwelcome.

[littlemourningstarr]

Do You Mourn the Passing of the Hours?

Former Professor Emmrich Volkarin had spent years settled into a quiet life running a small, quint flower shop in Nevarra. He expected that any excitement was far behind him. Enter, Lucanis Dellamorte. Professional assassin. Antivan Crow. A possessed man. A possible bad decision to take in Lucanis after an assassination goes slightly off kilter, and suddenly Emmrich finds his life is full of far more excitement than he'd ever had. But maybe, for the man who had begun to experience the world through a cloudy window of fascination but never truly partaking, the excitement would remind him what it was like to truly be alive again.

Chapter Eleven!

Pairing: Emmrich Volkarin x Lucanis Dellamorte, Emmrich Volkarin x Spite, Emmrich Volkarin x Lucanis Dellamorte x Spite

Read below or on AO3!

Tags: tags to be added as we go, modern AU, flower shop AU, demonology AU, former professor Emmrich, still assassin Lucanis, physical hurt/comfort, scent kink, Spite is a little freak, mentioned/discussed past Viago/Lucanis, background Teia/Viago, pinning, slow burn, hand kink, masturbation, background Bellara/Irelin, biting, hand jobs, blow jobs, anal sex, anal fingering, surprise piercing, canon style violence, virgin Lucanis

Emmrich unlocked the door to the house, against the his own laughter as Bellara continued to tell him about some of the misadventures she had had, during her undergraduate years.

"I remember mistakes like that so fondly," Emmrich had to admitted, as he stepped inside. The house was silent, around him. Which was… odd. He had expected to hear Lucanis in the living room, or in the kitchen- he had texted him earlier that Bellara was coming by with him for a final visit- her flight back to Arlathan left early the next morning.

But there was nothing. Emmrich paused- but then didn't even bother removing his shoes, something in his gut not feeling right. He walked through the dining room into the kitchen, and noticed the mug he had placed beneath the coffee machine for Lucanis that morning still sitting there- cold, full, untouched.

"Lucanis?" Emmrich called, as Bellara stepped into the kitchen doorway.

"Emmrich? What's wrong?"

Emmrich gently brushed past her, heading for the stairs and climbing them quickly. He rushed down the hallway, found Lucanis's room empty. Completely empty. In fact, it had the air of a room untouched for decades, already.

He felt Manfred rub against his leg, and glanced down. The cat bound off towards his study, and Emmrich followed. Nearing his desk, he noticed a piece of his stationary, left next to his laptop. He snatched it up, not having needed to ever see Lucanis's handwriting to know it was his.

Emmrich.

Seeing his name made his heart lurch, begin to claw up his throat. He could hear Bellara on the stairs, making her way up.

I'm sorry. Caterina's dead.

"Dead?" Emmrich whispered to himself, as Manfred jumped up on the desk, looking intently at him.

You're not safe around me. If I stay- someone else will try to take your life. I can't be the cause of your death, too.

Emmrich felt his hands shake. He didn't understand why Lucanis would think he was responsible for Caterina's death- but there was no other way to read that statement.

There was the start to a sentence, but it was so scribbled out Emmrich couldn't read it- and beneath it.

Thank you.

Lucanis

"He's gone," Emmrich whispered to himself, turning around and finding Bellara waiting at the doorway for him. "He's returned to Treviso."

"Because of last night?" Emmrich knew Bellara meant the attack- which he had explained in length to her- and not the spontaneous intimacy that had occurred after- which he had not mentioned- yet he couldn't wonder if perhaps he had overstepped. Gods, Lucanis had admitted after that Emmrich had been his first… "So, what are you waiting for?"

"Come again?" Bellara walked into the room, reaching out and covering Emmrich's hands on the paper he was clutching so desperately.

"What are you waiting for? You know where he went- book a flight and pack your suitcase!"

Emmrich gawked at Bellara. Because he couldn't… that would be rash…

He was already moving out of the study, towards his bedroom, his closet, a small rolling suitcase that had been touched in over ten years still tucked away. As he did Bellara followed, pulling out her own phone, listing off all of the flight times to Treviso she could find.

As he haphazardly began to pack, he did fish his phone out, and tried to call Lucanis once. The call went directly to voicemail- and without a word he hung up, slipped his phone away, and shut his suitcase. He couldn't dwell on the sinking feeling in his belly, on the way his heart ached far worse than it ever had, in his chest.

If he had over stepped, he wanted to apologize. If Lucanis feared for Emmrich's safety, he wanted to confront that. He couldn't just let everything that felt so right die, when it had only just been born.

It seemed he was going to finally see Treviso.

*

Treviso was warmer than Nevarra, the early morning sun blinding Emmrich for a moment. Next to him, Bellara pushed her sunglasses down, looking at a map of the city on her phone.

She shouldn't have even been there- but once Emmrich relented that there wasn't a single strand of his very being that didn't want to go after Lucanis, she had canceled her flight to Arlathan and booked the seat next to him that evening for Treviso. In her words, I don't let me friends adventure without me!

Emmrich was honored, and endlessly thankful, to not be doing this alone.

He was exhausted down to his bones from the overnight flight. Their hotel was only a few blocks walk from where a shuttle from the airport had dropped them, and he was thankful. He didn't want to waste a moment's time- but he also knew his mind wouldn't function at its best in his current state. He needed a few hours of rest, in order to get his head on correctly.

He pulled his rolling suitcase along, his other hand gripping Manfred's leash. The cat had been very well behaved during the journey, and had more energy than both Emmrich and Bellara combined, in that moment. He pranced along next to them, head whipping about as he took in all of the new sights and sounds.

The city was breathtaking, Emmrich could admit. He felt heartbroken that he wasn't experiencing this with Lucanis at his side, the man's hand in his own, as he eagerly talked about his favorite cafe, planned where they would be eating dinner that night.

He forced the ache down, not wanting to dwell on it. He'd fix this. He had to.

They checked into their hotel, separating for their respective rooms. They agreed to be back up in a few hours- just enough time to let their minds reset.

Emmrich removed Manfred's harness, once his hotel door was shut. The cat was quick to hop up onto the bed, walking it as if inspecting it. Emmrich didn't even bother shedding more than his shoes- he crawled into the bed, clothing slightly rumpled, jewelry still all in place. He thought the moment his head hit the pillow he would pass out- but he found himself ten minutes later still staring at the opposite wall, as Manfred settled up on one of the pillows.

Despite the exhaustion his mind was racing. He had spent the flight from Nevarra reading the latest papers Myrna had shared with him, which would have given a glimmer of hope of possibly separating Spite and Lucanis, if Emmrich could bring himself to hurt the spirit he was so fond of.

The only method that boasted actual results ensure the destruction of the spirit, and Emmrich couldn't support that- morally or personally. He found Spite felt like simply another part of Lucanis, and destroying him felt like fracturing the man he had come to love.

The word made his mouth taste metallic, as if he had bitten his tongue. He rolled onto his back, stared up at the ceiling. That's what this was, wasn't it? At the end of everything, it didn't matter how educated he was, how worldly-

He'd fallen hard and fast for a man- and the spirit that clung to him, possessed him. He felt ridiculous, was so sure this sort of fast falling should have been beyond him- yet here he was.

Worried about Lucanis, missing him- fearing that the man might simply fade away, into the Trevisan sky.

He rolled to his other side, forced his eyes shut, began to count slowly in his mind to calm himself. If he wanted to ensure Lucanis's safety, he needed to be at his best. And that meant sleep.

It was another hour before it actually came.

*

By midday, Emmrich and Bellara were as rested as possible, showered, put together, and back in the city.

"We could try to find his home," Bellara offered, standing at a street corner and looking at her phone. Her hair was thrown up haphazardly, her patchwork sweater long gone in the Trevisan heat.

"And just show up unannounced?" Emmrich asked, "the audacity."

"Emmrich. Social politeness is going out the window." She leveled a stare at him, her sunglasses sliding down her nose, and he nodded. Right, she was right- they had flown to another country after all, without Lucanis's knowledge.

They crossed the street with the crowd, Emmrich pausing as he stepped up the curb, noticing a large cafe. The name, Cafe Pietra, was familiar.

"Wait," he said, gently placing a hand on Bellara's arm. "That cafe. Lucanis has mentioned it. I believe it was his favorite." Before he could say more, Bellara was steering him in the direction of the cafe.

"Okay, so maybe we run into him and you two can have your happily ever after reunion. And I can get some caffeine."

The cafe was bustling, much livelier than Emmrich had anticipated. The air was rich with the scents of strong coffee and sugary pastries. Was this what Lucanis was used to, daily? Emmrich could see being drunk on the comfort of it alone.

Bellara pushed Emmrich towards a table and moved to order them coffee- much to his chagrin. He had planned to buy their coffee.

He settled down, glancing around him. Most of the tables were occupied, small groups speaking together- a few blatant morning dates as the couples leaned in close to speak with an intimacy that made Emmrich feel hollow.

Lucanis may have felt he had put Emmrich in danger, but Emmrich didn't care. Danger be damned, he hadn't felt this alive in… he wasn't sure how long. Someone's very soul had never sung to his in the way Lucanis's did.

He loved him. Maker and dead gods all be damned, he loved him. And he needed the man at least to know.

Bellara returned a few minutes later, setting coffee in front of Emmrich. From the scent alone it was indeed a classic Antivan roast, robust and bitter. "Cream and sugar," Bellara said, as Emmrich picked up the cup, "but I figured tea wasn't going to be strong enough."

Emmrich nodded. Truth be told, he wanted something that felt like it belonged to Lucanis anyway.

"So, anyway," Bellara said, after taking a moment to wince as she took too large a drink of her scalding coffee. "We find where he lives, we find him. If he's a Crow, and an important one, that can't be that hard in Treviso. What's his family name?"

"Dellamorte," Emmrich offered, as Bellara began rapid-fire typing on her phone. She had a point, he knew- the culture was different here. Lucanis might not have walked around tutting that he was an Antivan Crow back in Nevarra, but it would be common knowledge here. Half the cafe's current clientele were probably Crows.

Before Bellara could even finish typing, two additional cups were set on the table, and one of the chairs was pulled out. A short elf woman sat down, her dark curls wild as she leveled a stare at Emmrich. And before he could even say a word, she stated- didn't ask- "You know Lucanis."

Bellara nearly dropped her phone, having not even heard the woman sit down. She stared, as Emmrich cleared his throat.

"I do," he admitted, "Hello, by the way. I'm-"

"Nevarran, judging by your accent." Emmrich quirked a brow, and the woman folded her hands, leaned closer. She had a woody, deep rose scent to her perfume. "Would you happen to be a former professor with a specialty in spirits and demons?"

"Demons is not the term I'd use-"

He didn't even finish before she cracked a little smile. "And it's safe to assume you own a flower shop. And a cat." Emmrich pinched his lips shut, nodding. The woman pushed her seat back, stood as quickly as she had sat, gathering up her two cups of coffee. "Come with me."

Bellara and Emmrich glanced at each other, before they picked up their cups and hurried after the woman, struggling to keep up with the way she cut through the crowd with ease. It was only once they were outside the cafe that Emmrich could walk by her side.

"Do you know Lucanis?" he asked, before adding, "And how do you know so much about me?"

"It's our job to know things." She nodded towards a car, parked at the curb, as she shifted the cups to one arm, fishing out her keys. "I'll explain once we are somewhere quieter."

Emmrich nodded. Caution be damned, if he was about to be kidnapped for some unknown reason in a country he'd only been in about five hours- so be it. He'd figure it out.

Once they were in the car and in traffic, the woman finally said, "Teia. My name, by the way."

Emmrich perked up. "Lucanis had mentioned you! And your boyfriend, I believe…" he paused, searching for the name. "Viago, was his name?"

Teia smiled as she took a turn rather sharply. "Boyfriend when he remembers to behave. Good to know Lucanis didn't forget the two of us while he was off gallivanting in Nevarra." The quick glance she gave Emmrich made him believe she knew far more than she was letting on, and he had to glance away, feeling the faintest heat rising in his cheeks.

He knew very well she caught it.

"Lucanis came home last night," she offered, tapping her fingers on the steering wheel while they waited at a light. "I'm the one that called him about Caterina."

"Did you know her?"

"Quite well."

Emmrich nodded. "My condolences. How is Lucanis?" Teia glanced at him, before the light changed and she hit the gas.

"Scattered." She didn't elaborate, as she pulled into a driveway, parking the car. Emmrich climbed out, Bellara following from the back, as Teia gathered both coffee cups and led them in the front door.

Emmrich and Bellara followed her into a living room, where she set both cups on a small side table and flopped onto the couch. Emmrich stood awkwardly, holding his own, as Bellara's eyes darted around the room, taking in the art hung on the walls.

Before Emmrich could speak, he heard a voice from upstairs, "Teia? I assume that's you." There were footsteps, along the stairs, as the voice continued. "I haven't heard from Lucanis and I am considering storming the villa…"

A man appeared in the doorway, hair wet and falling against his forehead, over the tips of his ears. He was dressed in nothing but a towel that he was holding at his waist.

"…and you're not alone."

Bellara bit back a laugh, trying to hide behind taking a sip of her coffee, as Emmrich quickly glanced away, at the ceiling.

Teia simply sighed. "No Vi, I'm not. I brought your coffee, and a very interesting gentleman from Nevarra."

The man- Viago, he had to be- turned his attention fully to Emmrich, who was forced to glance from the ceiling. After only a moment, Viago cleared his throat. "Right. I'm going to put some pants on…" Teia waved him off as he left, before she gestured to the seating in the room.

"You can sit down. I promise this isn't some overly dramatized Crow ambush."

"Oh! Like in the series, The Crow's Gem, where three Antivan Crows have a Tevinter magistrate over for evening drinks and-" Bellara paused, Teia openly staring at her. "I'm rambling. Sorry."

Bellara plopped down into a love seat, as Emmrich crossed the room, sat next to her. "This is Bellara- forgive her excitement. It is well meaning." Teia gave a little forgiving smile, and Emmrich added, "And I'm Emmrich. A pleasure to meet a friend of Lucanis."

Teia leaned forward, forearms resting on her knees, as she studied him. "It's nice to put a name and face to this mysterious man Lucanis met while in exile in Nevarra."

Emmrich cleared his throat, feeling quite self conscious beneath that stare. After all, Teia was beautiful, Viago had been… Maker, was everyone in Antiva breathtaking? And he was…

Well. Too old to be chasing Lucanis, yet here he was. Playing the fool and refusing to drop out of the play.

"Lucanis wouldn't say much," Teia continued, her smile softening. "But I've never seen him smile the way he did. Smitten is the only word I can think of." She tipped her head slightly, before adding, "If he likes you, you're fine in my opinion."

"And your opinion is law." Viago spoke from the doorway, returned and properly dressed now. He walked into the room, grabbed the coffee Teia had brought back for him, and took up the spot next to her on the couch. "No one would question the Seventh Talon." He gave her a playful smile, before he turned his attention back to Emmrich. "Lucanis isn't here."

"I gathered that much."

"He insisted we take him to Villa Dellamorte last night upon his arrival. I haven't heard from him since."

"I have eyes on the villa," Teia added, "there's no reason to think he's in danger."

Emmrich tensed. "But would there be reason to consider that otherwise?"

Teia and Viago glanced at each other, before Viago gave an exasperated sigh. "We just worry about him. He was not in good shape when he last left Treviso- to come back only for Caterina's death… and gods know Illario is no help." Viago said his name as if it was coated in poison. "The man can't even confirm when Caterina's ashes will be prepared for the funeral. Teia has asked more times than I would."

Emmrich nodded. "May I ask- what were the circumstances of her death?"

Teia answered as Viago took a long drink of his coffee. "An attack on the villa- Venatori."

Emmrich frowned, Venatori… "I thought the cult's presence was minimal in Antiva."

"It is." Viago was frowning. "Which makes this suspicious beyond words. And to get so close…"

"There's more." Teia stood up, fishing out her phone and walking over to Emmrich. When she turned it, there was an image of the blade that had been used to stab Lucanis, the first day Emmrich had met him. "Lucanis sent me this picture- wanted help with the inscription. I don't know what it says, but it is definitely in Tevene."

Meaning the blade that had been used against the both of them was inscribed in Tevene as well.

"His contract was on a Venatori?"

"It would seem so."

"Is that common?"

"It's not uncommon," Viago offered, from the couch. "But typically it's from one Venatori to another- a power play. With very specific instructions, to leave a message."

Emmrich rubbed his jaw with one hand, thinking, retracing that first day. Lucanis had come in with the specific order, roses and lilies…

But he hadn't known what colors to use.

"The contract that sent him to Nevarra- is it possible to see it?"

Viago and Teia glanced at each other, before Teia pocketed her phone. "You're thinking something."

"It could be a moot point, but I'd like to check something."

"I can get you access to any of Caterina's contracts," Teia said, motioning for Emmrich to follow her. He stood up, following her towards the stairs, could hear Bellara and Viago following, Viago asking,

"Since when did you have access to the First Talon's contracts?"

Teia didn't answer, opening the door to what might have been a spare bedroom but had been turned into a study. She sat down at a desk, opening her laptop, and within moments was sifting through files.

"Caterina wanted someone else to have access," Teia finally said, "she didn't… care for the technological aspect of the business." She pushed her chair back, standing up, and nodded, offering it to Emmrich.

He sat down, scrolling through the document- it was very brief, detailed who the target was- never once calling him out as Venatori. It seemed as if the contract was coming from a spurned lover- a wife who had caught her husband cheating. The roses and lilies were meant to symbolize a funeral to their love-

And nowhere were the colors specified.

Emmrich leaned back, folded his hands in his lap. "It's odd," he said, "that the contract puts such a stress on what flowers be delivered, yet makes no mention of the color." He glanced back, but the other three were just looking at him for context. "Roses are often a sign of love, and lilies are common at funerals. but they come in many colors- and those colors can have different meanings. But…" he trailed off for a moment, "When you think of a rose, what color do you see?"

"Red," Viago offered, and Emmrich nodded.

"And a lily?"

"White." Teia, now.

"What if whoever sent this contract didn't actually care about sending a message, and simply wanted Lucanis to stand out to his target, in some way? They just assumed the roses would be red, the lilies white, and probably told your dead Venatori to look for a man with red and white flowers."

"But then how were the colors correct?" Viago asked, stepping further into the room.

Emmrich reached up, pinched the bridge of his nose. "That, unfortunately, is my fault. When Lucanis came into my shop to place the order, I helped select the colors. Gods, he could have avoided the whole debacle if I'd simply offered a different suggestion…"

He felt a hand on his shoulder- Teia, offering a small smile. "I can tell you, Lucanis would be furious to hear you blame yourself. From the brief way he spoke about you last night, I would have thought you could move mountains." She squeezed his shoulder again, as Viago took up the space over his other shoulder, reading the contract.

"This contract is sloppy," he said, "and minor- why would she even bother with it? This could have been given to any house- why waste Lucanis's talent?"

"Because it would get him out of Treviso?" They all glanced back at Bellara, who had spoken up from where she stood in the doorway. "Emmrich, you said he wasn't allowed back in Treviso while he was…"

"Still possessed," he filled in.

"Right. Well, maybe Caterina planned to have him stay in Nevarra the entire time, no matter the outcome of the contract. I mean, Nevarra is fairly calm compared to I'm sure some of the places he could visit."

Teia lifted her hands, pressing them together and to her mouth, clearly thinking. "She could be right," she said, after a moment. "Caterina hid it well, but she was upset over Lucanis's abduction. Sending him somewhere removed from the house would make sense, to keep him safe." She turned to Viago. "I will follow the contract. You need to get Lucanis to us so we can tell him about this."

"He hasn't been returning my texts."

"Well then drive over to the villa and kidnap him if you need to, Vi! Whatever it takes, get him here." Emmrich pushed the chair back, stood up as Teia took his space, cracking her knuckles. Viago huffed, but was already pulling his phone out, trying to reach Lucanis.

"Teia," Emmrich said softly, as she began began jotting notes on the unnamed contract benefactor. "Who else would know about these contracts?"

"What do you mean?"

"I mean, details, who they were assigned to, what might be in waiting… anything really."

"Caterina," Teia said, "myself, now. Lucanis would have, Illario…" she paused, then shook her head. "No one else- not unless the contract was assigned to another house. Anything that comes directly to one house remains in their private network… I'm the exception." She glanced up at him. "You think it was someone that close?"

"It would be the most logical answer. Let's remove Caterina herself and Lucanis- that leaves you and Illario." Before Teia could speak, Emmrich added, "I don't believe it was you."

She relaxed, slightly, as behind the group Viago could he heard yelling, "Dammit Lucanis, pick up your fucking phone!"

That didn't seem to be going well.

"Would Illario benefit from something happening to Lucanis?" He asked it softly, as Bellara tried to calm Viago, who was still cursing at his phone. "I'm sorry if that is insensitive, Lucanis mentioned him briefly, and I know they were close, but-"

"It's not. And yes, he would. It was blatant that Caterina would pass the title of First Talon onto Lucanis upon her death- or if she ever stepped down."

"Do you think he would have betrayed Lucanis to inherit?"

Teia frowned, glancing down. "Sadly, yes." With nothing else to say on the matter, Teia continued her work- and Emmrich pulled up another chair, offering to be a second set of eyes.

*

It was evening when Viago all but gave up trying to reach Lucanis and simply left. Teia had assured Emmrich that if anyone was going to magically locate him, it would be Vi. He had a sixth sense, when it came to Lucanis.

As it was, Emmrich was immersed in Teia's findings. The contract had led back eventually to a fake identity- which then led to a real Venatori. One Teia recognized.

"Calivan," she said, circling his name on the paper she was writing on. "Lucanis's contract when he was abducted was on him. I'd say it's the only outstanding contract House Dellamorte has to date." She tapped her pen. "A Crow never abandons a contract. I remember Lucanis had been adamant when he'd been returned to us that he get his pound of flesh. I'm sure that desire hasn't waned." She paused, before adding, "Caterina had considered letting him return to complete the contract. She didn't want a shadow over the house…"

She trailed off, and Emmrich offered, softly, "But?"

"But Illario had been so vocal about his concern for Lucanis that she relented for now. It was one of the few times I ever saw her concede to Illario."

Emmrich nodded. His gut was sinking more by the minute that one of the people Lucanis trusted could very well by responsible for the worst thing to ever happen to him. "Could Calivan know he was the target of a contract?"

"Possibly." Teia drew a line, before writing another name. Zara. "He works closely with Zara- a Tevinter magistrate. It's barely a rumor and nearly considered fact that she's Venatori. The rest of the magistrate just ignores it." Emmrich couldn't be shocked- he'd never heard enamoring things about most of the Tevinter Magistrate. Not that governing classes were ideal anywhere. "There's other rumors about Zara."

"Such as?"

"Her love for demons." Emmrich fought down a cringe at the use of the word- he couldn't fault Teia for it. "Word has always been she has experimented with possession."

"Spite," Emmrich whispered. "The contract on Calivan- it could have been simply to get him close enough to Zara. And she forced the possession on him." Teia nodded, clearly thinking the same thing. "But why?"

Emmrich felt anger rising in his belly. He folded his hands to keep from fisting them. He would love to look the woman in the eye that had hurt both Lucanis and Spite- after all, the spirit was a victim in this as well. Spite would have never morphed into what he was, if not forced to possess whatever flesh had been shoved into Lucanis's gullet.

Emmrich could make no promises about his gentlemanly ways, should he meet her. He was sure the rings on his fingers would react nicely to someone's teeth.

"Lucanis is one of a kind," Teia said- something Emmrich would most certainly agree on. "He's the best of us. Perhaps she thought he was… robust enough to handle her experiments."

"Someone had to deliver him to her," he said, rubbed his jaw. "And who placed the contract on Calivan?" Emmrich asked, circling back.

Teia had a knowing look in her eyes. "Illario. He would know that sort of contract would go directly to Lucanis. He would know the details about the set up, be able to ensure the Venatori had an advantage. Lucanis is good, but even he has his limits." Teia paused, before she added, "Don't ever let him know we think he has limits."

Emmrich chuckled. "I suppose I can keep one secret from him." Teia nodded her thanks, before she pulled her phone out, glancing at a message.

"One of my Crows," she said, "she may have something. I need to go." She stood up, gesturing towards the chair. "Feel free to continue my work." She said it with a smile, and Emmrich returned it- despite his fear for Lucanis and his well being, he had to admit, he was having quite a good time picking Teia's mind.

The Crow slipped out of the room, and Emmrich could hear her speaking with Bellara, somewhere downstairs. Once the door opened and then shut, Bellara was making her way up the stairs, knocking on the door frame and leaning in. "You doing okay?" she asked, and Emmrich nodded, his attention fixed on Teia's little mapping of names.

Illario, posing as someone who wanted Calivan dead, set Lucanis on that contract, knowing he would be captured and delivered to Zara. But why not kill him? Why keep him and experiment with spirits? Only to have Lucanis freed, and have to go through the process of trying to have him killed again.

Something was missing.

Bellara settled on the floor by the desk, her back to it, as she scrolled through her phone. Her silent company was reassuring- Emmrich was afraid to be alone, in that moment. Having a problem to solve, items and names and ideas to chain together kept his mind busy- and with someone watching, he would need to stay composed. He couldn't let the worry eat him alive.

The room was silent, when they could hear a car pull up. Emmrich assumed it was Teia- he hadn't kept track of the time- but when the door opened, he heard a voice that had his heart jumping.

"Viago, this had better be important."

Emmrich pushed his chair back, rushing from the room, towards the top of the stairs. From there he could see the doorway as the front door closed, Lucanis looking directly at Viago.

"It is." Viago glanced up the stairs, paused when he saw Emmrich, and a moment later Lucanis followed his stare, those gorgeous dark eyes going slightly large when they settled on Emmrich. They had shadows beneath them, as if Lucanis hadn't slept since returning to Treviso- but he was breathtaking, all the same.

"Lucanis," he managed to say, reaching to grasp at the railing of the stairs. He had never wanted to run so badly in his life, to gather the man up in his arms, tangle fingers in his hair, grasp at his shirt, kiss him until his mouth was numb. He just wanted to feel Lucanis against him, to know he was real, he was here-

That this entire affair, from the moment he'd first met the Crow, hadn't been a dream.

[seigephoenix]

Stuck in my Head 1

Just a silly little, smutty fic. There's 2 parts. It's Emmrich x Rook. My Odette Ingellvar. No plot, just smut.

Content Warning: blowjob, smut without plot, kissing Length: 2k

“Have you studied the sky here in the Fade?” Odette asked leaning down to peer into the telescope in Emmrich’s laboratory.  The wine glass dangled perilously in her fingers as she let it warm her slowly.  She’d come into the laboratory to talk with Emmrich about the Lighthouse.  Bellara had a lot to say as well, but Odette would confess to just wanting to spend more time with Emmrich.  The sky stretched into an endless expanse of pastel colors.

“It is fascinating.  I often wonder if the sky stretches to the stars here as well,” Emmrich told her as he joined her on the landing.  Odette suppressed the shiver when his shoulder brushed hers.  She was supposed to be a professional.  Hard to be professional when he cradles that wine glass like that.  Her body ached at the thought of those hands against her, those fingers in her.  She scolded her thoughts for turning in that direction.  They’d shared a kiss and Odette assured Emmrich that she cared for him and only wanted him.  Nothing else had happened and Odette wondered if that was to do with her or Emmrich’s chivalry.  Self doubt was so hard to get rid of…  “Are you listening?” Odette tore herself away from fantasies about those fingers dragging down her throat to her collarbone.  She was a simple woman at heart and the thought of his fingers touching her skin sent heat tingling along her body.

“Sorry.  I think I’ve had too much wine.” Odette chuckled as she drained the last of the wine in her glass and set it aside.  She almost jumped out of her skin when the backs of his fingers brushed across her cheek.  Her heart thundered in her ears with the heat rising in her cheeks.  Heat swam in her blood from wanting to lean into his touch.

“You are looking flushed,” he said quietly.  Odette swore silently at the way his voice went right to her core.  She was far from innocent but it had been too long.  His eyes dipped down to her lips and her breath hitched in her throat at the heat there.  That hungry gaze made her ache.  Emmrich’s hand cupped the side of her face tenderly.  His thumb brushed along her bottom lip, tugging until her lips parted.  He leaned down until their lips were a scant inch apart before he straightened as they heard the door opening downstairs.  “I.  I don’t know what came over me.”

Odette wanted to scream in frustration.  To just yell at him that she wanted to kiss him, wanted so much more.  The fear of rejection killed the words on her tongue.  Instead she nodded and stepped back when he did.  “Don’t apologize Emmrich.”  They both looked down as Manfred brought in another bottle of wine for them.  Odette smiled as she saw him looking up at them so happily.  She glanced up at Emmrich for only a moment before her finger hooked into the front of his collar and tugged.  He followed her curiously, she could see the way his eyes narrowed that he had a suspicion about her intentions.  Her lips brushed over his in a heartbreakingly gentle touch.  Odette wasn’t sure what came over her but her teeth tugged at his bottom lip teasingly before she pulled away, releasing his collar before turning to head down the stairs to join Manfred.

She left him staring at her back and wanted to laugh or cry, she wasn’t too sure which.  She was never that bold, it wasn’t in her nature.  She would blame it on the wine rather than the frustration throbbing between her legs.  Instead, she focused on Manfred and thanked him for the bottle.  He poured her another glass when she knew damn well she should not be drinking anymore.  It was hard to disappoint him, so she accepted the offered glass.  She accepted that she’d be suffering from a hangover the next morning.  Odette turned to the fireplace and sighed when she sank into the plush chaise lounge summoned by the Caretaker.  She wrapped her fingers around the glass as she watched the flames crackle, knowing she had to get to her room to sleep off the alcohol.  She didn’t hear anything behind her, but she did hear the door closing.

“Manfred?  Emmrich?” Odette looked over the back of the lounge not seeing either of them.  She sighed and shook her head.  Normally she treasured her solitude, but since coming to the Lighthouse…  It felt different being by herself.  She finished off the glass and hummed as she set it aside.  Her eyes grew heavy as she leaned against the back of the chaise.  Her eyes closed when she stretched her arms up towards the ceiling.  She felt him behind her and smiled as his hands reached down to cradle her cheeks.  She tilted her head back and hummed softly when his hand slipped lower over the front of her throat.  Her neck arched into the touch with a soft moan falling from her lips and he froze.  Odette cursed her damned body for reacting.  But she wanted his touch too much to try and marshal her defenses.  She felt him slipping away and she grasped onto his hand.

“Don’t.  Please.”  He looked down at her fingers wrapped around his wrist and the soft pleading look in her eyes.  Emmrich knew he was lost when he stared into those pale blue eyes.  He followed her hand and sat down next to her on the chaise.  Odette leaned her head against his shoulder with a happy hum.  The wine was going to her head, but she didn’t want to go to her quarters yet.  Even if frustration cut deep into her, she was too content to move.

His fingers slipped between hers bringing her hand to his lips for another chaste kiss to the back of it.  Her eyes watched his lips with her heart thundering in her ears.  She moved without thought and touched her lips to his.  Heat exploded between them and she moved without thinking.  Her body turned towards his, her hands dove into his hair with her fingers curling in the strands pressing tightly against him.  His fingers dug into her hips when her knees straddled him, never once breaking the kiss.  She couldn’t get close enough to him.  Odette groaned at the taste of him on her tongue, rich and dark like the wine they’d been enjoying.

Odette never wanted to part from him.  She lost herself in the taste and heat of him.  His reaction strained against the front of his trousers, pressing against her aching core, and the desire to taste him almost overwhelmed her.  Their lips parted with shallow breaths and a soft sigh from him.  She moved before he could stop her, sliding down until she knelt between his legs resting her hands on his thighs.  “Odette.”  She shook her head when he reached for her.  That tone of his told her this would end if he grabbed her.  She didn’t want it to end.

“Please?” The word stretched between them, honey and dark promises dripping from her lips along with the word.  When she asked like that.  He couldn’t deny her anything it seemed.  He nodded leaning his head back when her fingers twisted and freed him from his trousers.  He covered his eyes with his hand, knowing that if he saw her, he would be lost.  They would not be sleeping in separate rooms if he looked down at her.  Just the thought of himself in her mouth…  He clenched his jaw at the burst of heat in his body.  Her fingers wrapped around his cock and he fought the groan that wanted to escape.

Odette sighed when she rested her thumb just below the head of his cock, pressing in lightly.  He had a pretty one, with a soft upwards curve and plump head.  She leaned forward and pressed open mouth kisses along his shaft, grinning when she felt him shuddering.  Her hand slowly stroked him while her lips and tongue teased him.  Odette breathed in and groaned as her body throbbed when she felt him trembling.  One of his hands curled in her hair, tangling in the golden locks as he tried to direct her head where to go.  She ignored him.  Her lips skimmed over the head of his cock savoring his reaction and muffled groan from the touch.  Odette smiled against him before parting her lips and taking him inside her mouth.  She groaned and flattened her tongue against him, moaning softly as his taste filled her senses.  His fingers tightened in her hair as she slowly lifted her head, letting her tongue drag along his cock.  Odette moaned when his fingers scratched her scalp before she began to bob her head.

He surrounded her, his body, his heat, everything.  His breathing was choppy as he struggled to muffle his reactions, and she wished he wouldn’t.  Instead she focused on sucking harder, she wanted to see him fall.  The urge grabbed her and she had to see him as he fell over that edge.  Cracking the perfect professor mask, and to see the man beneath.  She glanced up when she heard him mumbling about stopping.  “Close.  Don’t.”  Odette shook her head and hollowed out her cheeks in a move that had him gasping.

His fingers twitched in her hair, tightening as he curled forward.  She heard her name on his lips and heat pulsed low between her thighs.  She was soaked and aching for his touch, but she had to hear him.  Her name was broken by his soft moan as the orgasm pulsed through him.  Odette moaned along with him at the sinful way her body responded to it.  She didn’t lift her head until his fingers relaxed in her hair.  His cock slipped out of her mouth, spent from his orgasm, as she lifted her head.  Odette looked up at him and she swallowed at the look on his face.  He looked angry but there was a hunger in his eyes that sent heat spiraling through her body.  A lock of his hair fell over his forehead ruining the perfect professor image he had for the rest of the world.  His cheeks were flushed but his eyes were focused on her.

“Come here.”  He reached for her just as the door sprang open.  Odette froze as did Emmrich.  He jerked upright, hastily smoothing a hand over his hair in an attempt to tame what her fingers did.  He also tucked himself back into his pants before turning to see who it was.  He seemed surprised by who was there.  “Harding?”

“Oh hey Emmrich.  Sorry to bother you, but have you seen Rook?  Spite is sleepwalking again and he really only listens to her…”  Harding jerked her thumb over her shoulder.

“Ah yes, she’s taking a small rest.  I’ll wake her and tell her.  Where is Spite?”  Emmrich sent a glare towards Odette who smoothed her hands down his thighs.  She froze and looked away like a chastened schoolgirl.

“Well Taash has him trapped in the pantry.  We just really don’t want Spite to throw a tantrum there, so if you could have Rook go there soon?  Thanks.”  Harding spun on her heel and headed out of the room, shutting the door behind her.  Odette waited until she didn’t hear her boots before she ducked the hands coming for her.  She rolled and popped up to her feet, keeping herself out of reach from Emmrich.  Odette was quite impressed with her escape attempt, even if the room did spin just a little from the maneuver.

“Well, you heard Harding.  I’m going to go help Spite and Lucanis.  Then I think I’ll go to bed…”  Odette trailed off when he stood.  Panic blossomed in her chest at the way his eyes narrowed at her.  She bolted before he reached her, running straight towards the door, ignoring him calling her name.

[himluv]

Dark, Complex, and Intriguing

Would anyone like some more Lucanis right before the holiday?

The cot creaked as Lucanis settled onto it with a sigh. He loosened his collar, unpinning his crow-head lapel chains, and leaned back to rest against the wall. He could not remember the last time he'd felt so relaxed. 

Despite everything, he was alive and free. Treviso might be occupied by the Antaam, but it had not lost its spirit nor its charm. The markets were as vibrant as he remembered, though there were differences. He just couldn't tell if the city had changed, or if the difference lie with him. 

Perhaps a little of both.

But Café Pietra had not changed. The atmosphere was impeccable, both intimate and lively, a bastion for coffee enthusiasts like himself. And the Andoral's Breath was just as good as he remembered. 

He could have wept at the aroma alone. For a moment there, he almost had. It all hit him at once, in those split seconds before that first sip. He was alive. Treviso was still there. And he was about to drink his favorite coffee, one that mere days ago he had believed he would never taste again. 

If he'd been alone, in private, he would have let the relieved tears fall. But Rook was there, quietly sipping her own cup of Andoral's Breath. Lucanis had been flattered that she took his suggestion, and even more pleased that she'd seemed to appreciate the brew almost as much as he did. 

And then their conversation had spiraled into strange territory, about first kisses. He stood by his statement, first kisses were like honey and lavender cream. Things were always sweetest when they were new and so full of potential. 

But Rook's answer was a good one. Each kiss is different. She'd sounded so sure, and so sure that he understood her meaning. That he shared that experience. 

Nothing could be further from the truth. He barely knew anything about first kisses, and he only knew of kisses goodbye from the novels he'd read. Romance just wasn't a part of his life. Mainly because his life had never really been his. 

So he'd changed the subject. And when asked about her coffee, she’d described it as dark, complex, and intriguing. Which could describe Andoral's Breath…

His eyes snapped open with realization. “Mierda, I'm an idiot.” Rook hadn't been talking about coffee at all. All that talk about kisses and then she says that?

Was Rook… flirting with him?

No, Spite said. Not possible. Why would Rook. Want. You?

A perfectly legitimate question to which Lucanis had no answer. But, he knew just who to ask. 

The next morning, Lucanis went to visit Bellara. When he entered her quarters, Neve was there, the two of them chatting about some new scandal in the Tevinter papers. 

“Oh, hey, Lucanis,” Bellara said.

He panicked. Talking to Bellara about this was stressful enough. He couldn't have this conversation in front of Neve, too. 

“I'm interrupting,” he said. “I'll come back later.”

The women shared a look he could not interpret, but seemed to come to an understanding.

“I was just leaving,” Neve said, which was obviously a lie. “I'll talk to you later, Bel?”

Bellara smiled. “Sounds good, Neve!”

Lucanis listened to the detective go, and waited for the door to close to look at Bellara.

She frowned. “Is everything okay? You're acting strange. Is Spite acting up again?”

Not me. Not this time.

“No,” Lucanis said. “Spite is fine, for the moment.”

“Oh, well, good!” 

Lucanis stood in the center of the room and tried to think of what to say. But everywhere he looked his reflection stared back from too many mirrors and he couldn’t think.

Glinting and golden. Trinkets for the tinkerer, Spite mused. 

“Sooooo, what did you want to talk about?” Bellara perched on her workbench, swinging her feet like he and Illario used to do on the rooftops as boys. The familiar motion helped him settle.

“You and Rook are friends, right?”

She nodded. “Oh, sure. I mean, we've been Veil Jumpers together for a couple of years now. Although we didn't see each other much after she left to help Varric.”

“But, you are close? You… understand her?”

“Uh, yeah. I guess.” She laughed. “Lucanis, what is this about?”

He ran a hand through his hair and sighed. “We went to meet Illario at Cafe Pietra last night—”

“—oh, yeah! She said she had a great time.”

“She…” he blinked at Bellara. “She did?”

Rook talked. About you? Spite bounced between Lucanis and Bellara, curious and agitated. Why?

She nodded, her earring jangling with the motion. “Mm-hm! She said the coffee was super good.”

“Of course it was,” he said. He crossed his arms over his chest. “What else did she say?”

“Um, nothing really. Just that she liked it and it seemed like you had a good time. She said it seemed good for you to go.”

“I did,” he said. “And it was.”

“That's great!” Bellara smiled at him. Then her brow furrowed. “Is that what you wanted to talk about?”

“Yes,” he said. “and, no.” He pinched the bridge of his nose. “Mierda, I feel so stupid.”

Stupid, Spite sang. Stupid stupid stupid!

“You're not stupid, Lucanis,” Bellara said. “What's going on?”

So, he explained it. His whole conversation with Rook, nearly beat for beat. 

“I've thought about this too much,” he said, shaking his head. “I can't believe I thought she was flirting with me.”

Bellara laughed. “Oh, she was definitely flirting with you.”

WHAT?

“What?”

“Yeah,” she said. “Which for her is pretty smooth. I wonder if she was inspired by the coffee or…?” She stopped when she noticed his dumbstruck expression. 

“Oh, is it unwanted? I can tell her to stop—”

He put a hand up to interrupt her. “No! No, thank you, Bellara. I can handle it.”

“Okay,” she said. She chewed on her lip, and a little crease in her brow gave him pause. 

“What is it?”

“Just, if you're going to turn her down, maybe…” she winced. “Do it gently?”

He raised a brow at her. 

“I don't want to get into it, but her last relationship ended pretty badly, so, you know…” Bellara blushed, as if she knew she shouldn't have said anything.

Her last relationship… how many had Rook had? How far behind was he? Not that it mattered, because he was not going to pursue this. He didn't do romance.

Still, he gave Bellara a soft smile. “I'll take that into consideration,” he said. “Thank you, Bellara.”

“Anytime,” she said. 

He headed for the door, but paused as Bellara called after him. 

“And, Lucanis?”

“Hmm?”

“Maybe try to get some sleep?”

He nodded. “Maybe,” he said, then stepped back out into the courtyard. 

Back in his room, Lucanis lay on his cot and tried not to think. Bellara was right. The lack of sleep had left him frayed, which made him more likely to overthink and analyze every interaction. 

Rook had flirted with him, and he'd been utterly clueless in the moment. Were there other times she'd said something he'd misunderstood? How oblivious was he?

But the biggest question he kept repeating was, so what?

Rook flirted with him. So what? She seemed kind and like she genuinely cared about his well-being. So what? She rescued him from the Ossuary. So what? She wasn't afraid of Spite. So what? 

Did any of that actually matter? Lucanis wasn't even sure he wanted her affections. He had so much else to think about— Treviso, Caterina’s funeral, his vengeance against Zara, and, of course, Spite. And, he couldn't forget this contract. He had gods in need of killing.

It was too much. There wasn't room in his head to discern if he even liked Rook, let alone what to do if he did. And he was so, so tired.

Luckily, a year in the Ossuary had made Lucanis good at shutting down his thoughts and feelings. He just needed to breathe and be still. Spite, however, was less skilled.

The demon prowled the pantry, muttering just loud enough he was sure Lucanis wouldn't be able to ignore him. 

Rook. Likes. You? He spat. Why? Rook is smart. Nice. Fun. Spite glared at Lucanis. Not like youuuu.

There was a pause as Spite waited for Lucanis to reply, but he said nothing. He didn't even look at the demon. He was trying to sleep.

Yesssssss. Sleep! Then I find Rook! Spite's grin always looked threatening, but this one was a little too unhinged. Ask what she sees in YOU.

Lucanis ignored the way his chest tightened at the thought of Spite controlling his body while he and Rook were alone. He could not let that happen.

“She's not here,” he said. “She left with Harding early this morning.”

Spite growled in frustration. We. Want. OUT!

This argument again. Until he found some way to separate them, he didn't think Spite could get anymore “out”. This was as good as the demon would get.

No. No no no. We. Made. A. DEAL.

With a sigh, Lucanis sat up and rested his head against the wall. “We'll go to Treviso later,” he said. “I need more spices anyway.”

Spite growled, but it was a low sound, one of resignation. Fine.

Lucanis smiled. A lifetime with Illario had prepared him well for dealing with this demon. When they threw fits for not getting what they wanted, you gave them something else they wanted. Something smaller, easier to manage. 

Spite liked the markets almost as much as Lucanis did. It was a simple thing to offer a visit, something that would be pleasant for them both.

With the demon settled, a fresh wave of exhaustion washed over Lucanis, and he fell asleep there, propped against the wall. 

In the dining hall, the door opened, the groan of its hinges pulling Lucanis from his sleep. He checked the candles, but they still burned high and bright. He hadn't slept long.

Footsteps drew closer, the muffled slap of bare feet on the stone floor. So, Rook was back. 

He ignored the pleasant churn in his stomach. She wasn't coming to see him, she was probably just hungry. 

But then his door opened and she peered inside. “Hey Lucanis,” she said. “ Got a minute?” Her face was bright from exertion, or perhaps too much sun reflected off water. Of course she and Harding would spend the morning outdoors. They were both too pale for so much unfiltered daylight. It made the freckles scattered across the bridge of Rook’s nose look like sprinkles of cinnamon on latte foam. 

His stomach did another traitorous flip. 

“Of course,” he said. 

She smiled, ducked out of the room, then reappeared with a silver and purple tea set. “Um,” she said. “I, uh, got this. For you.”

He stared for a moment, eyes wide and mouth agape. “For me?” 

She smiled. “Yeah. I know it's meant for tea, but I figured you could use it for coffee.” She shrugged. “You know, so you can keep it close?”

He took it from her and set it on the side table nearest his cot. First the wyvern-tooth dagger, and now this? If he'd had any doubts about her interest, they were gone now.

“Thank you, Rook,” he said. “That's very thoughtful.” Lucanis was genuinely touched by the gesture. It was a lovely set, one he recalled seeing in the market the night before. Had she gone back for it today?

“I'm glad you like it,” she said, her smile widening. This close, in the candlelight, Lucanis noticed the violet tinge to her blue-grey eyes. The color reminded him of the innermost petals of the crystal grace in Villa Dellamorte's gardens. Delicate and pale, and so soft to the touch.

“Well,” she said, breaking the silence. “I'll, uh, see you at dinner?”

Lucanis cleared his throat and looked back at the tea set. “Of course. I'll see you then.”

He didn't look at her as she left the room. He didn't want her to see the confusion he felt reflected in his eyes.

Trouble, Spite said. 

And for once, he and Lucanis agreed. Because, as rare as it was for him, Lucanis couldn't deny the way his stomach flipped when he thought of her. Or how flustered he felt when they stood too close. How the air warmed when she walked in the room and how easy she made it to smile. 

He groaned and rubbed his face with both hands. Maker help him, he was falling for Rook.

[sorrelchestnut]

Birds on a Wire, Lucanis/f!Rook, 2/?

Part One.

The next morning she is awake before him, as has become usual the last few months.  Lucanis sleeps well these days, now that he no longer fears what his body will do once unattended.  Her troubles with the dreaming world have no such simple solutions.  Lucanis makes a mental note to confer with Emmrich the next time they meet, and goes looking for his wayward lover.

He finds her in the courtyard, debriefing with the Caretaker.  "-need tending," she's saying.  "They all think they're real now and start wilting if they don't get watered.  And Bellara will be back from Arlathan in a couple days, can you make sure she eats and sleeps at regular intervals?  She's pretty good about it if you remind her."

"Of course, Dweller.  I will see to it."

"Thanks, mate.  I know things have been quiet but if you have any problems in the Crossroads send a message through the Treviso eluvian.  We'll be back in a flash to see it handled."

"Of course, Dweller.  Safe travels."

"We'll certainly do our best.  Hullo, pet," she says, turning with a smile as he approaches on her right.  "You all packed?"

"The essentials, at least," he confirms, hefting his duffel.  "What about you, is that all you're taking with you?"

Rook shoulders her own much smaller rucksack and grins at him.  "Not much to take, you know me.  Couple spare daggers and a change of clothes and I'm all set."

Clothes that are just as stained and tattered as the set she's currently wearing, unfortunately.  The past months have not been kind to anyone's belongings but…  Lucanis pictures his grandmother's face and winces. "We could both use a refresh of our wardrobe," he says diplomatically.  "We'll have to visit my old tailor, if he's still in business."

She only shrugs.  Someone told Lucanis once that Rivainis like to wear their wealth; clearly no one saw fit to inform Rook.  "Your coin, dove.  You ready to go?"

"At your lead, signora."

If someone told him six months ago that he would grow accustomed to traveling halfway across the continent in the blink of an eye, Lucanis would have laughed in their face.  But he thought the same thing when he first took a life, and with enough repetition that grew to hold all the intrigue of yesterday's lunch.  Today he steps through the eluvian at Rook's heels and into the cool, damp air of an Antivan winter, and thinks only with irritation that it looks as if it's going to rain.

Rook's clearly thinking the same.  "Oh, look at that sky.  Might have a storm on our hands."

Ugh.  "You're not wrong," he's forced to agree, eyeing the sky with disfavor.  "If we don't hurry we're going to get caught in it."

"Oh, you think?"

He turns the skeptical look on her.  She's practically bouncing on her heels, giddy as a child.  "You cannot be serious."

"Do you know how long it's been since I've even seen a storm?  In Minrathous it's a light drizzle four hours a day like clockwork, and the Crossroads are mildly sunny night and fuckin' day."

Yes, and Lucanis loves it.  He'd go back right now if he could.  "Have you ever tried to run rooftops in a downpour?"

"I've boarded ships in a hurricane, love, still think they're cracker."  She laughs at the expression on his face.  "Can't help it, I just love loud weather."

"Thunderbolts and lighting!" Spite agrees.

It's Spite's nature to be argumentative, and if he can suck up to Rook in doing so then all the better.  But Lucanis thought better of her.  "You are a very strange person.  There is nothing enjoyable about wet clothing."

She laughs again and slings an arm around his shoulders.  "Aww, poor grumpy Lucanis.  C'mon, Spite, let's go before his highness gets his feet wet."

There is a fledgling waiting for them at the canal docks, though Lucanis did not take the time to send his grandmother a reply.  She must have set the boy to wait as soon as she sent the letter, as if to remind Lucanis that it is beneath the First Talon to procure his own gondola.  He tucks his sigh behind his teeth.

"Your name?"

"Marco, monsignor."

Lucanis doesn't recognize him, but then, he doesn't know most of the fledglings in Treviso these days.  Caterina kept herself busy during the occupation, pulling in all manner of disaffected youths with dreams of being freedom fighters.  He wonders wearily how many of them will survive the brutal reality of a Crow's apprenticeship without the numbing salve of patriotic fervor to fuel their ambitions.  There will be a great many failures over the next few years, is his estimate, and as always, those few who succeed will be forced to cut their matriculation from the throats of their less fortunate brethren.  And Lucanis will have to be the one to order it done.

(didn't want this. never wanted THIS)

"Good to meet you.  Are you to take us to the villa?"

"Yes, monsignor."  His gaze roams unsubtly around the empty dock.  "And will, ah, your luggage be traveling separately?"

"Most people just call me Rook, lad."

Under other circumstances Lucanis might enjoy the fledgling's wide-eyed look of panic.  "Signora- Monsignora, I did not mean-"

"Ignore her, Marco," Lucanis instructs with a sigh.  "We're ready to depart when you are."

Rook gives the white-faced boy a clap on the shoulder and jumps into the waiting gondola, sure-footed as a cat.  Lucanis follows her more circumspectly, dropping his duffel at her feet.  "Play nice with the children, cara."

"I'm always nice."

"I know of several who would disagree."

"Yeah, but how many of them are still alive to say so?"

"Ah, the 'leave no witnesses' approach.  Very Antivan."

"Learned from the best."

Lucanis soon falls silent as the gondola progresses through the canals, his capacity for banter exhausted by the presence of their witness, but Rook nobly takes up the banner of conversation with some convoluted story of a failed treasure hunt involving three pirate ships and a dragon.  Lucanis listens and makes noises at all the right intervals, but his attention is fixed on their surroundings as they pass.

(enemy territory)

It's not like this for normal people, Lucanis thinks.  Neve is justifiably cautious taking a stroll around Docktown's meaner streets, but she watches the crowds, looking for a common thug or paid mercenary to try their luck.  Harding keeps an eye on her purse and Taash shoulders through crowds like a ship cuts the water, but neither of them move through the world as if death could come at any minute.  Even Rook, who handles her blade with a particular familiar flourish that Lucanis has very carefully not questioned how she might have been taught, doesn't share his reflexive, ceaseless paranoia any time they go somewhere he hasn't personally vetted.  He wouldn't wish that fear on his worst enemy - but neither would he want her denied of any tool that might keep her safe.

(WE will keep her safe!)

That's what Lucanis's mother thought, and his father, and all his aunts and uncles.  Thirty years ago, House Dellamorte numbered in the dozens: five children, four spouses, eight grandchildren, countless body servants and retainers.  Of those, only Lucanis remains.  And he dares to imagine Rook beside him in this pit of vipers?

(blood and brine.  storm and steel!)

True.  Rook has survived worse things than any the Antivan Crows can offer, that's to be sure.  Even now, her laugh comes easy, her haphazard tale flowing like good wine - but her gaze is watchful, flitting from the rooftops behind Lucanis to the streets ahead and back again.  And underneath the fold of her tattered traveling cloak, her hand rests casually near the hilt of her sword.  Perhaps it will be enough.

Part Three

[gingervitus]

1 and 7 for the Rook and their partner ask game if you're still taking asks? :)

YES. I am still over here being totally normal about them™ and ready to answer asks still.

Just a disclaimer again: I am a professional yapper and will go on too long so I am very sorry in advance.

1. Does your Rook fall for their partner at first sight? If not, what moment made your Rook realize they're in love with them?

I don't know if it was necessarily love at first sight, but I think something stirs in Ella when she and Bellara (yes, it's always Bellara) hit the Ossuary to save Lucanis. He's an objectively handsome man who single handedly took out multiple Venatori guards after that fucking backflip out of his cell. And the WINGS (she's Rivaini so spirits don't bother her). The style. The brooding. The beard.

Ella is out here like:

But my dear Rook doesn't realize she's in love until Weisshaupt. She's been playing her flirting game and doing all she can to be around him because she simply enjoys being around him. He's a ball of yarn that she can't stop unraveling. There's a magnetism that draws her right back to the dang pantry every single time she's back at the Lighthouse, but they're friends. She might even go so far as to say he's one of her closest friends at that point, though Taash is quickly rising in the ranks.

When they end up at Weisshaupt, of course Mila is their guide, and Ella wants nothing more than to return the sassy lil Warden child to her dad but feels dread knowing he could very likely be dead. Every time Lucanis checks in with Mila or gives a word of reassurance, Ella has her heart twisting in her chest. They're both orphans, but without any other family, Ella had been that little girl alone. Seeing this renowned assassin who cooks love into every dish he makes for the team so dead set on reuniting Mila with her dad has Ella absolutely cooked.

She lays on her chaise that night after everything with her heart pounding in her ears at the realization that she's absolutely head over heels in love with this fucked up lovable man.

7. Are they a physically affectionate couple? Are they fine displaying those affections in public or do they prefer to be in private? If they're not, how do they prefer to show their love instead?

I was thinking about this over the last couple of days actually. My sweet unserious LoF (but also very clearly hiding an old buried hurt) Rook is very touchy. She's a casual conversation toucher. Very openly affectionate with everyone around her. She accidentally pats Strife's arm while chatting early on and nearly dies by means of death glare. Lucanis, however, is relatively closed off especially with people he's just met. He won't be just touching for the sake of touching. Especially when Spite won't shut up about Rook, which has Lucanis fully believing he can't possibly genuinely be into her. That it's just the demon. When Spite is sitting there unable to hear anything else besides the intense yearning Lucanis is going through.

Even when their feelings are clear for one another, he doesn't know what to do or how to act. It's all new territory, and he definitely cannot screw everything up. Meanwhile, she doesn't want to make him uncomfortable or push anything too far. So they just... stay like this for quite some time. It's not until well after the gods have been defeated that it gets addressed. All of their concerns are laid out on the table (or rather while they walk the streets of Treviso early one morning), and after that, it's all hands on smalls of backs. Hands held under tables. Kisses to knuckles. Longing gazes when the other is talking. Subtle enough to be acceptable in public, but enough that it's clear they are very loudly in love.

In private, there are a lot of mindless touches. Lucanis likes to toy with her curls, wrapping them around his fingers. Twirling the hairs at the base of her neck. Lightly scratching between her shoulders. Kisses to her forehead when he passes by. Whereas Ella is still ever the toucher. Sometimes she will just tap on his hand as she ponders things. Or there's always the clapping against upper arms or shoulders when she's enthusiastically talking about something. She touches his chest a lot, though, when it comes to actual affectionate touches. Gentle ghosting over a clothed or bare chest. Playing with chest hair (there is no way he's not hairy). She has always loved to be near him, so getting to be so close she can touch him any time she wants is thrilling.

They also write each other a lot of little notes. Sometimes silly. Sometimes loving. Always messages written with all the fondness in the world.

[solitaireships]

Friendly Banter - Part 1

Hi, and welcome to the first little series of fics I'm doing on here! I was disappointed by the lack of banter/companion comments on what character you end up romancing, so I decided to take matters into my own hands and write my own banter. There'll be five parts of this, with each one having banter between Minala and a different companion

This first one's going to be with Davrin! It's a little non-traditional for my selfship fics since it's not only not including my f/o in the fic and it's actually pre-relationship, but I think it's cute

Rating: Gen

Genre: Fluff

Words: 654 words

Divider by saradika

“Alright,” Minala says, sighing as she stands up from her seat in the library. “We should have everything good to go for heading back to Hossberg tomorrow. Thanks again for helping out, Davrin.”

“It’s no problem. It might not be my usual station, but I know enough about the Wardens' work there to lend a hand,” he says.

While the two of them were making plans for their next venture out, he’s been whittling away at a bit of wood, slowly shaping it into another monster for his collection. His craftsmanship has always impressed Minala— she can’t imagine working on something as unforgiving as wood for hours. At least if she spells something wrong in one of the stories she writes, she can always just start again on a new page or cross it out. There’s no fixing mistakes with woodcarving, not without starting over from scratch.

“Well, either way, I appreciate it,” Minala says. “It’s a little late to head over now, but I’m thinking we can head out there with Bellara tomorrow morning.”

“Sounds good. Maybe when you fill her in on the plan, you can let her know about some other things too,” Davrin says.

Minala blinks, looking over to where he sits, still carving away on what looks to be a carving of a deepstalker. “Sorry, I could tell her about what?”

Davrin shrugs. “The world possibly ending seems like a good motivator to tell someone you’re interested in them.”

“I still don’t know what you’re talking about,” Minala says. 

It’s a blatant lie, and probably one Davrin recognizes as such. It’s not as if the two of them just talk in a professional capacity— Minala’s surprised at how easy it’s been to make friends with the rest of the Veilguard, and she and Davrin seem to get along particularly well. Well enough that he clearly doesn’t buy her attempt to say there’s nothing between her and Bellara, with him raising a doubtful eyebrow as he keeps working on his whittling. 

For a moment the two of them are in relative silence, the only sound being his blade carving through the wood. Then Minala sighs, fiddling with one of her braids with one hand. 

“Okay, yes, I like Bellara. A lot more than I expected to. I was hoping to keep it quiet until I figured something out, but… well, here we are.”

“Here we are.”

“And apparently I’m not doing too well at keeping it quiet.”

“I only know because a griffon told me,” Davrin says.

“Assan can’t talk.” At least Minala’s pretty sure he can’t.

“He can’t,” he confirms. “But I did overhear you talking to him about Bellara.”

“Ah.”

“And with how often the three of us go out together, it’s hard not to notice the eyes you two keep giving each other,” Davrin says.

“We’re not giving each other eyes,” Minala insists. Or at least she’s pretty sure that Bellara’s not giving her any looks like that— maybe she’s been focused a little too much on her and just didn’t notice. The thought that it’s obvious enough for Davrin to have noticed her looking is embarrassing, though.

“Right. Well, like I said. If the world might end, I’d at least take a chance with someone I’m interested in,” Davrin says, leaning back in his seat. 

He has a point and Minala knows it. They’re doing everything they can to stop the gods and keep their Veil from falling, but there’s always a chance things could go wrong. She doesn’t know how much longer she or anyone else will have left before the end. She should ask Bellara if the two of them might be something more than friends before it’s too late. 

But still she’ll need to work herself up to that. 

“I’ll talk to her. Not right now, but soon,” Minala says. “And thanks.”

“No problem. Just try not to give yourself something to regret.”

[nightingaletrash]

for the oc codex prompts - 5 for alessia please!!

5. letters between two of your OC’s companions about them

Two letters packaged together. One has a coffee stain from a mug, and seems to have been written earlier than the second

Neve,

Okay I'm writing this now because I am so excited, but I can't actually say anything yet but if I say nothing anywhere I WILL explode!

Ali and Lucanis are having a baby!!!!! Ali told me this morning and I've only just stopped bouncing - okay that's a lie, I'm still bouncing in between sentences but I'm just so EXCITED!!

Can you believe this? I remember when I first met them, Ali was wandering into a Fade bubble and Lucanis- well, I told you all about the Ossuary. Back then, all I could think about were the gods and the Blight and the end of the world. I still remember the moment it ended. Suddenly it was just over and I couldn't imagine where our lives were going to go. I was so scared that we would all just drift back to our lives and that would be the end of it. I didn't want everything to be over.

But I never imagined that it wouldn't be over, just different, and now with a little baby Dellamorte-de Riva on the way!!!! Oh I'm so impatient, I want to meet them now!

Anyways, I'll stop now before I actually end up sending this before I'm supposed to. I'm waiting for Ali to give me the all clear before I talk to anyone about it, which means I'm locking myself in the workshop until then.

Love Bellara

p.s. don't worry I packed provisions

--

Neve,

I've been given the all clear so I'm sending this now! AHHHHH!

Love Bellara

A letter smelling faintly of gingerwort. A few spots of oil dot the bottom of the page, as if the writer had been eating while writing.

Bel,

Lucanis told me the same day Rook told you, so you probably would have been fine to send the first letter, but good on you for staying quiet for so long. And for not telling Fred either. You know Emmrich would have come back from a lecture and wondered why his favourite student was running around shouting 'baby' over and over again. Apparently it's been nonstop since they were told, and he wants to go and pick out some bones for it in the Necropolis. Emmrich's going to have to give him the Talk before he does anything upsetting.

I'm not sure I believe it any more than you do. Part of me still thinks I'm still in the Upper City, all wrapped up in Blight and that Elgar'nan is just letting me believe we'd won. I know it's nonsense. He'd never humour a world where he wasn't front and centre, but I can't help it. The idea that we survived and are now living happy lives where some of us go off and get married and have children? Insanity.

Let's just hope those two lock up all the knives and make sure that Uncle Viago doesn't leave any loose bottles lying about. Not that I think he's the sort to be sloppy, but babies love getting into things they shouldn't. It's like they have a death wish or something. And the Lighthouse won't make it any easier. How do you babyproof a place like this? We can't stick up guardrails all over the place - the parents are Crows, it'll just climb over them.

Glad I'm not the one who has to figure all of this out.

Love Neve

p.s. we should all go out for a drink to celebrate when we get the time. Rook will survive with something non-alcoholic.

[awardenandacrow]

FANFIC SNIPPET 42

[Naimy sees Treviso for the first time]

——————————————————————————

“That’s… Dock Town through there,” Neve nodded towards the Eluvian. Naimeryn glanced towards her and the mirror, seeing the shimmering distortion over streets of stone, wooden scaffoldings and boarded over windows, and glowing magical lights. Her stomach knotted. She knew Neve was eager to go home, and to touch base with her Shadow Dragon contacts. She owed the Shadow Dragons in part for her freedom, so surely she should also be excited to meet them?

But the thought of returning to Minrathos again, and so soon, made her feel physically ill. What was wrong with her? She should be well over these feelings by now. Hadn’t she told Harding she couldn’t keep letting a dead magister control her life?

The dwarf in question spoke then.

“This one looks like it’ll take us to Treviso,” she called over from the next mirror, a little way back from the Minrathos one. Naimeryn wandered over to Harding. She’d never been to Antiva, and knew next to nothing about it beyond it being the home of the Antivan Crows. Although it was bright in the Crossroads, it was night time in reality, and unlike Minrathos with its magical lighted banners and signs, Treviso twinkled with only lamplight. The sky was largely unobstructed by even its tallest buildings, and the moon shone down on the city, it’s light sparkling off the water of the canals.

It looked so… serene.

“Neve,” Naimeryn said softly, tearing her eyes from the Eluvian, “we’re just meeting with your Crow contacts to essentially finalize a contract, right? Do you think we could do that now, and head to Dock Town in the morning?”

“I think that would be wise,” Neve nodded, “Tarquin won’t be able to meet us until then, anyway.”

“Oh, good,” Naimeryn said with a sigh of relief. At least her internal issues weren’t going to inconvenience anyone. “I wonder if there’s a way we can sort out to better keep track of time in the real world when we’re in the Fade.”

She chewed on her lip. “And I hope the Crows won’t mind meeting after dark.”

Neve snorted. “I doubt it.”

“I’ll head back and talk to Bellara about the time thing,” Harding offered, pulling her bow back off of her back. “She may have some ideas.”

“Does this make you uncomfortable?” Naimeryn asked. “If the Demon of Vyrantium joins us, will that be a problem for you?”

“Oh, no, nothing like that,” Harding shook her head. “I’m a professional! I just… I’m not much of a contract negotiator.”

“Fair enough,” Neve laughed. “Will you be all right, finding your way back on your own?”

“Yeah, I remember the way,” Harding said brightly. “I’ll see you both when you get back!”

“All right, see you!” Naimeryn gave her a little wave as she turned back the way they had come. She turned back to Neve. “Ready?”

“Let’s go,” Neve nodded, and gestured for her to go through first. Naimeryn took a deep breath, and did so.

The view she’d gotten in the Eluvian’s surface had not done the city of Treviso any justice at all. Naimeryn gasped, stepping forward just enough that Neve could follow her before standing, rooted to the spot, not even noticing that her feet were getting wet from the foot of water they stood in.

“The Drowned District,” she heard Neve mutter. “Lovely.”

The water lapped halfway up stairs and against wooden walkways on stilts. Was this… the Rialto Bay? Were they near there? Naimeryn’s knowledge of geography involved a few glances at a map.

Other than where they stood, the water’s surface was so smooth and still that the stars, moon, and lamplight were all reflected downward, as though the sky and it were one, endless pinpricks of light in all directions. Turning back towards the city, the wooden pathways lead to structures built just above the water’s surface, and to stairs between them into the city proper. As Naimeryn’s gaze rose with them, she could see sweeping arches, trellises covered with vines and blooms, and windows of glass that was not quite clear but not as ornate as the stained glass windows of Minrathos’s Chantry. Through arches and windows and peeking between leaves, everywhere, was light. The city itself seemed to glow from within.

“Have you ever seen *anything* so *beautiful?*” Naimeryn asked Neve breathlessly.

Neve chuckled in response. “The jewel of Antiva, I believe they call her. It’s a shame about the occupation.”

“The Antaam, right?” Naimeryn asked, finally tearing her eyes from the city to look back at her companion. “Is it bad?”

“It’s not good,” Neve said, taking a big step onto one of the wooden paths to get out of the standing water. She frowned down at her metal leg.

“Will it rust?” Naimeryn asked curiously, but Neve only laughed.

“You worry too much,” she told her. “Do you really think I haven’t enchanted this thing against all of that?”

“Oh,” Naimeryn felt her face grow red and she quickly dropped her gaze, stepping up next to Neve. “I’m so sorry.”

Neve’s gentle touch on her shoulder startled her. “I know you mean well, Rook. But you don’t have to worry about me.”

“Of course not,” Naimeryn grinned sheepishly at her. “You’re Neve Gallus.”

Neve cocked an eyebrow at her. “You’ve been talking to Bellara too much.”

“Rook and Neve?”

Naimeryn jumped, both mages instinctively reaching for their weapons as another body *thud*ded onto the path with them from above. A young boy, maybe thirteen years old, stood up in front of them. He had short dark hair and soft, dark eyes.

“That’s a good way to get killed, little cousin,” called the voice of another, older boy, crouched above them on the roof of a nearby building. “You are lucky our guests have steady hands.”

With that, the other boy joined them on the path. This boy wore his longer hair in a low ponytail, but he had the same dark eyes as the first.

“I’m Dareth,” the older boy said, putting his arm around the shoulders of the younger and giving him a playful shake. “This is Jacobus, my cousin. We’re Crows. Andarateia Cantori has eyes out for your arrival.”

“Well met,” Neve said, relaxing.

“Are you to be our guides, then?” Naimeryn asked, releasing her grip on her staff. She’d heard horrible things about the Crows’ training methods, but these boys were… bright. Playful. She thought back to the few times she’d met Zevran. She supposed he was also surprisingly easygoing, but he’d been away from the Crows for a very long time already when they’d met. Maybe it was a common trait amongst their ranks.

“We’ll make sure you don’t get into any trouble with the Antaam,” Dareth nodded. “If you’ll come with us.”

“Avoiding trouble is *not* my specialty,” Naimeryn smirked, “so I think that would be best.”

Jacobus returned to the rooftops to run ahead and inform Neve’s contact that they were on their way. Neve conversed with Dareth as they walked, but Naimeryn found herself looking every which way, trailing behind, soaking up all the sights.

[anti-eluvians]

First Veilguard playthrough thoughts! Spoilers obviously. I started writing things down about 24 hours in, most of which was exploring the maps and avoiding plot (as is tradition).

Overall I loved it. Obviously. One doesn't cry for twenty minutes over a world they don't care about. Or write however many words this post ends up about events that didn't affect them.

Post introduction- I'm really worried about Lace. She's taking everything too hard and I don't know if I can save her without romance.

Bellara is so cute and so smart, but basically Merrill if Merrill had been supported. That romance may appeal to me later but not on this run

So they really put something to steal on the very first aravel we can ever board. Really? Really???

After D'Meta's Crossing- the chat with Varric where he comforts us about the hardship of leading and says he met us during our faction's catalyst event. Doesn't that make him this game's Duncan? So all Rooks happened but only the one he was WITH got recruited? I love and hate that because we know what happened to Duncan.

Solas said the Blight we've dealt with since Origins is a tiny fraction, and that his rebellion drove the Evanuris to turn to it as a weapon. That sounds a LOT like the time Andruil went too deep "into the Void" and Mythal had to beat her ass to cleanse her. So WHO or WHAT is in the Void that actually created the Blight? Is it Titans?

If the lyrium ritual dagger is such pure lyrium dwarves wouldn't work it... is Rook gonna be okay carrying it around??? Clothing is not enough to protect someone from lyrium poisoning! Are we gonna start hearing the song and hallucinating like Origins Templars?? Honestly I would love that lol

I'm quite pleased that my pre-game take on Rook has panned out! My Rook chose to join Varric & Lace on their mission so she's not nearly as weighed down as my other three leads. Warden was forced to Join or die. Hawke was forced to flee and stumbled into infamy trying to protect their family. Inquisitor picked up the wrong rock and was shunted into their role as Herald/Inquisitor. Rook could have said no, but chose this path. Having had a choice is so freeing!

Reading that Lorelei (the Shadow Dragon vendor) was from Denerim is the second time I cried. Loghain sold her into slavery before the Warden could rescue her and I feel, weirdly, personally responsible for failing her.

I can't believe Lucanis is so charming and doesn't even try. I can take him out with anyone and they get along. Not sure yet if that's a HIM thing or Bioware avoiding the friction of Anders/Fenris and Vivienne/Blackwall.

So the Dalish and Veil Jumpers know that the Evanuris sucked actually. That is AMAZING for me because I've wanted my Lavellan to shout what she learned (from the Well of Sorrows and in Trespasser) from the rooftops. That it is now common knowledge means SOMEONE shared what the Inquisition knew! And I have no reason to think it can't be my girl at an Arlathvhen. Which is what I always wanted for her; spread the word, brace the world against whatever Solas did next.

My clever brilliant snarky sister pointed out that maybe there are seven Old Gods for Tevinter but nine Evanuris because Mythal and Solas weren't sealed and don't count. I had to stare at a wall for a while. And if they really are the same entities, which Archdemon was which Evanuris?? And also, we're out of dragons so what happens after? A question Solas snarked at Blackwall in 9:41, the ass.

They really got to built the Kirkwall they WANTED with Minrathous. Twisting winding streets so easy to get lost in. I wish DA2 had gotten the development time it deserved.

Griffons made me cry happy tears and jump up and down. Losing the griffons immediately had me in stunned silence. And now.... it's Amaranthine all over again. Virmire. This sucks haha

I looked up the consequences of "Minrathous or Treviso" because I had to stop and go to work in the morning & cannot wait another 10 hours having simply CHOSEN. Mostly I feel like I made the right choice but Neve may never forgive me and that hurts. Reddit is also saying that the faction shop in the abandoned city is GONE. Does that mean I failed Lorelei again?? That she's dead??? Or just won't sell to me anymore? I have to wait until I get home from work and I really don't want to know!

Update: they fucking executed her. By burning. I have never sought out fights with a Dragon Age faction before but I scoured Minrathous for Venatori. It felt like hunting Cerebus after the ME3 coup. I wanted blood and by god I took it.

In Arlathan forest after Davrin's mission I think I found the trail of the fourth Forbidden One. I had forgotten I even hoped they would be in the game!

The book club throughline is very cute and very sweet. I may even use it as the DAV group tag somehow. The cooking and domestic life stuff is heartwarming. Healing. I hope someone has written lovely canon-compliant fanfic for me to find after I finish the game.

The devs really went all out with the set dressing stories. Finding the corpse clutching an Evanuris relic made me put the controller down for a sec. And finding Keeper Hawen's skeleton made me outright cry.

I can't remember if Varric narrated in DA2, but I know he didn't narrate as much as they have him doing in this game. While it is fun listening to him write our story while we're still in it, it's also kind of disheartening to know how many people are stacked against us! Shut the fuck up Varric!

Gotta love the devs leaving little treats for players by key locations. Loot bags, ore, small chests-- like tempting a dog into a car with snacks lol

Tell me why the map that feels most "Dragon Age" is the worn down, miserable, dark, decrepit farm swamp. It feels like Lothering and I hated that place

I take it back I CANNOT EXPRESS HOW MUCH I LOVE THE ECHOING WELL

After the Cobbled Swan meeting:

Wow okay wow okay so the South is OVERRUN with the new Blight and that's why Inquisitor isn't involved. That makes sense and I appreciate Bioware acknowledging there would need to be a Good Reason. that said I am still annoyed she has a prosthetic at all but also started shaking and crying immediately.

Still thinking about this. everywhere we've ever loved is burning. And despite trying to rally the South again the Inquisitor made time to save Lace's Ma? Shut up I'm emotional again. though I wonder how "evil inquisitor" players feel about that move... Also glad to see that APPARENTLY non-Well Morrigan and Well-Drinker-Inquisitors reached a truce in the last 10 years. I hated having any PC who distrusted Morrigan.

Regrets of the Dread Wolf:

Wow. There was so so SO much information stored in the Regret murals. So many theories confirmed. Solas was a wisdom spirit, ALL elves were spirits, the elves waged war and killed the Titans, Solas and Mythal were Very Close, the Black City was elven/the Chant is incorrect. I should be reeling but really I am just. Vibrating out of my skin. Seven years of wondering, vindicated. What I did NOT expect is for Solas's dagger to have caused the Blight by sundering Titans and their dreams/lyrium. We thought lyrium and blight could be connected but never quite to this extent. THAT has me reeling.

So like. The Evanuris used Solas' dagger to end the Titan war, which also created the blight. They then went mad with that corrupted force (including Andruil and her Void swim) (Void = the emptiness left behind by the death of Titans?) and killed Mythal. Solas locked them, and all knowledge of the blight, away in slumber using their life force to power the prison. However the prison/veil also split magic and spirits from the material world, destroying the world order. Then the magisters siderial (one per locked-away Evanuris) accidentally let a pinprick of that power out, starting the First Blight. Do I... do I have it right.

Hold on (reviewing footage) the FIRST MEMORY we can view says Solas and Mythal met in secret because he had already split from the group. So is his rebellion NOT rooted in her murder?? Which is what he said in Trespasser??

the Regrets questline is destroying me. Morrigan ended up carrying Mythal anyway, after seeing her mother's ghost regret dying? After all I did to keep her as herself! Then that final word from Mythal that the elves of today can and will surpass Arlathan-- I started crying again. Leave me alone!!

Weisshaupt. Very emotional and too immersive for me to remember any thoughts. But I swear to god if Cabin In The Blight is Anders I will SCREAM.

Genuinely worried that Varric is a fade ghost and that's why no one ever visits him. That he died at the ritual and Rook is hallucinating.

You know the longer I think about it the more upset I am that Morrigan inherited Mythal. I spent the last 3 games trying to prevent what was, apparently, her inevitable fate. Why even give us the choice of the Well? Why offer the Dark Ritual at all? I'm used to going against canon (Warden Alistair) but this feels like a slap in the face to all my choices. All this along with essentially wiping southern Thedas off the map. So what was the point of our hero's effort? Just to, as Solas said in Trespasser, buy a few more years of peace?

Lace's fight with the Shade was such a great scene. I can't help but remember that she was present for the DAI Corypheus finale and saw him split the earth, lifting the Inquisitor's party into the sky. When she turned around to split Rook & Co from her own platform I gasped.

Emmrich wants to be a what

~~~

Took a 3 week break for the holidays, came back and started the loyalty missions. Sad I don't expect to see Cole or Sandal in the last act. This game broke Sandal's perfect score!

I also realized while gone that Lace was so angry at the start but seemed to settle down suddenly because the Shade split off. Her anger LITERALLY LEFT her body. And now she has dwarven/Titan magic. If we get another DA game I NEED it to be about the dwarves.

Poor Taash. Shathann (Sumalee Montano) knocked that final scene out of the park and I wept.

Loved the treasure hunt! And a new Compassion who talks like Cole and wants a big hat!! Cuuute

All these Chasind/Alamaari references got me emotional too. Makes me miss Jaws of Hakkon and Ferelden.

Wow the Warden puzzle in Sharksmouth is both so satisfying and so annoying! I love all the nods but hate that none of these statues are people from Last Flight. You know. The book about the Fourth Blight. That one.

On the other hand I got the Meredith unique item (mage flavor) so I can't stay mad loll

Okay! So! Wow! I would never guess that Taash's plot would be the one to highlight What Lies Across The Sea. frankly, I thought the executors would be on the same level as the snake men: namely, a joke that Bioware would never follow through on. And WHAT is all this NOISE about a STORM! Green clouds like Fade magic? The original Kossith settlers fled across the sea only to fall to the First Blight. The tablet says those blessed with dragon fire "see the unseen" so what is it about dragons (and archdemons) that means they can fight back? Is the Qun a sign that the Kossith left behind failed? So the Executors founded or inspired the Qun? This quest left with so many more questions I worry we'll never have answered.

Lost and Profane left me so upset I didn't write anything down. Seeing what became of Isseya was too terrible to feel good about saving the griffon babies. And then having to choose what happens to the griffons left me actually out loud sobbing for 15~ minutes. My sister sat with me until I calmed down. Yes I chose Arlathan but I feel like a traitor to my Warden and everyone who ever hoped to see a griffon again. And not being able to show Isseya Revas' feather because I decked the First Warden does not make me want to load an old save, it makes me angrier at the writing.

Bellara's mission hit less hard. I thought we would have to choose Cyrian's fate not... that. She really is Merrill The Second. So just like with Merrill I encouraged her to keep the item with lore of her ancestors. Also Anaris was looking for shelter from a storm. Bioware what are you up to

Still worried about fade ghost Varric. Are we keeping his soul from peace? IS there an afterlife for dwarves? Only if the Maker is real! Or is it all bad/slipshod writing because Mary Kirby was sacked before writing ACTUALLY wrapped???

I feel the need to point out that with the new rules introduced with Corypheus and enforced by Isseya, The Architect COULD TOTALLY COME BACK. UTHA WAS RIGHT THERE HE COULD ABSOLUTELY BODY HOP AND JUST BE CHILLING IN THE DEEP ROADS COME ON

Emmrich saved Manfred. My personal distaste for undead was less important than saving Emmrich's son (though we couldn't ask Fred's permission and that does bother me a bit).

~~~

Okay it is January 2025. My sister says I will likely finish the game this weekend. So here are my 'pre end of act 2 and/or third act' thoughts:

If Solas really killed Varric I may just take any chance to break the egg. I've had Varric way longer and he's been too important to too many of my heroes to go out like this.

IDK how to feel about the option to encourage my Inquisitor to actually get back with Solas. I had thought before playing DAV that she might DIE with him so if that's on the table I'm prepared for it. But they had her mention "give it all up for him" and uhh was that an option? Yes she loves him enough to die with him but does she love him enough to LIVE WITH him, and accept allllll his bullshit? I don't know. It'll depend how they present the choice, I guess.

I also said pre-release that if I could sacrifice Rook like we could sacrifice Warden in DAO that I would. That WAS before I romanced anyone so I don't know if I would go through with it given the chance. That's what save files are for I suppose?

My sister is being SO OMINOUS about act 3. She gives me the saddest looks but also says she loved the ending, I don't know what to think!!

I also built my Rook playlist on the idea of playing a Lawful Evil/Renegade Rook but the game has not allowed or led me in that direction. So now I'm considering going full renegade in act 3 as like a character breaking point... but my girl Mercar has held up far better than any of the other three did this far into their plots.

Knowing who writes the Randy Dowager has me in stitches and also agony

~~~

Well. Finished the game January 12. So much happened in the last four hours of gameplay that I really haven't processed it yet. Let's start with: I hate being right about Varric. Loved the prison quest, hated everything that happened. And how long were we gone? Days at least, weeks more likely, but the damage to Minrathous could happen in moments if Elgar'nan wanted it to. Viper is so strong and noble and definitely dying soon. Take the Joining you ass!

The Juggernaut(s) looked so much like Meredith's final form I got angry at her all over again.

So the Evanuris are gone and there will be no more blights. That's.... huge. The Evanuris were real and also the Tevene dragon gods. So the only religion left with a leg to stand on is Andrastianism. I do noooot want to meet the Maker. If the Maker is real then Varric can be with my Hawke. Don't turn that into another spirit thing.

And the void that sucked up Lusacan's body. Was that The Void where Andruil found the blight? Where does it go? Why did it take the dragon? He would have been a good source for more Joining materials, which are now a finite resource. The end of Grey Wardens, Dragon Age's staple faction, is in sight. That plus only having 50 years left to the "dragon" age really worries me for the future of this franchise. We cannot keep skipping a decade ahead.

Absolution ending Solas is just... wandering free? That is the OPPOSITE of what I want but having seen the other options, it is certainly the one I prefer. Finding out he CAN call himself a god (fight end) did fuck me up. And hearing DAI music followed by Lost Elf made me cry again. My Lavellan going with him feels less terrible if they can still visit her family and friends. And help people. However she IS still mortal so there's still a tragic end coming. This also means every headcannon and drabble I have are entirely plausible...! ...?

And what was with that stinger?? The Veilguard Remains Vigilant. Sure but do we get DLC? A book? Comics? A DLC?? The thought also occurs that a "storm that drinks the sky" sounds like the black hole that ate Lusacan. So are we veering into space metaphors/magic now? And is the consistent mention of Andruil hinting that she or the Void WILL return?

Wait was that slide about Arlathan saying the Golden City had returned? I read it as the Elves had a chance to make their own nation again, but the phrasing is actually very different isn't it... oh my. That would be cause for an Exalted March when word gets out.

That the Well of Sorrows song (any Inquisition song really) made me gasp every time it played highlights how flat this score is. I can mentally listen to Lost Elf or Dawn Will Come at will. But the only noteworthy DAV song was the menu theme and that's disappointing. Lorne Balfe and Hanz Zimmer have both done AMAZING work: what happened? I want to want to listen to this album, but I can't think of any specific song. Sometimes Arlathan sounded Mass Effect. Sometimes Minrathous sounded Anthem. I hope data miners will find and share the unreleased tracks, but I WISH the score had more emotion.

As much as this game hurt me, and as much as the world state choices let me down, it DID give me more Fade missions than all other games combined. I would love it for that alone.

And finally, quality of life improvements I wanted:

Beacons labeled on the map (so I know where the hell I'm going)

Previewing clothing & weapons (so I know what I want or don't)

Any explanation of the Valuables/faction points system (so I know not to sell everything to Veil Jumpers!!)

Enemies as red dots on the mini map. This seems self explanatory. I had to check with my party if there was another enemy nearby.

And an interrupt system. There were several cutscenes I would have liked to interact with via interrupt, especially at the end. This is less QoL and more something I said out loud several times.

[elcor-thespian]

I'm doing Rook and partner questions for each of my Rooks. One question at a time.

3) How long does it take for them to get together? Did anyone else suspect them?

I've worked out that I think the start of the game to the end of the game is about 3 months (I actually have a timeline written out because I am very cool and have an active social life). Use that context as you will

Nephele Mercar/Lucanis: 2 months. EVERYONE KNOWS. EVERYONE BUT LUCANIS KNOWS.

Nasreen Aldwir/Emmrich: 3 weeks. Nephele knows because Nasreen has been actively asking her for advice for navigating her first romance. You should always assume Neve knows everything.

Aleksei Laidir/Bellara: About 3-4 weeks to start dating, but they don't do anything physical until after the final battle.

Brenna Thorne/Davrin: 2 weeks. I think most people know. They're not being subtle about it. But it's more of like a "oh hey this is happening" versus Nephele/Lucanis which is "I stg you two could make out in front of us and it would be less sexually charged than whatever the fuck this is."

Elspeth de Riva/Harding: 3 weeks in to the start of the game, but they've known each other for a year at that point. Again, most people know.

Konstantin Ingellvar/Neve: A month. Everyone knows that Konstantin is in love with Neve. Almost everyone is surprised to see that she like him back (minus Neve, Elspeth, and Paloma)

Paloma/Taash: 2 weeks. I think most people were surprised by this one actually, because weren't they screaming at each other this morning?