#this may be my last post on this video/topic for now
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song of the spiral
these are the clips I recorded for backgroun music on my "song of the spiral" video. use the popout player for some music while you scroll, or take a break and listen for a bit.
while trying to decide which note blcok instrument to use for the background music, I discovered how nice note blocks sound when doubled with packed ice + gold blocks. it creates the perfect sound for a pensive mood.
the background music, in theme with the video topic, is also derived from the fibonacci sequence (and lucas sequence) using the same conversion framework.
full video here
#tumblr had a really hard time uploading this video for some reason#this may be my last post on this video/topic for now#minecraft#mineblr#fibonacci#fibonacci sequence#fibonacci spiral#modular arithmetic#note blocks#note block music#note block songs#lucas sequence#lucas numbers
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Entry 5 – The One About the Distorted Phone Screen that Sent Half the Fandom into the Ocean
I had no intention of writing about last week’s phone screen debacle, mainly because I found it obnoxious and a smidge infuriating. Not because I believed Jake to be on the phone screen but because people were SO QUICK TO BELIEVE it was Jake on the phone screen.
Honestly, I didn’t even need to see the “cleaned up” version of the picture because I would have sworn then – and would still swear now – it was Luke on the screen. White guy, dark hair, left hand touching his face (or, as it’s been suggested, removing sunglasses), signaling to me that the person in the photograph was left hand dominant. Add that in with all the information Luke and Nicola have laid out before us over the past three months (and, honestly, probably even before that) and there is no other answer: it’s Luke. The end, right? Nope, not even close. Like I mentioned in yesterday’s blog, we’re not allowed to have nice things.
The image comes from a video of Golda giving Nicola her WOTY award. People started taking screen grabs and dropping it into apps that claimed to clean up blurry images.
*Fun fact – I did this once to the picture of Nicola on the boat in Malta. I used three separate apps, in fact, and each time I got this frightening image of Nicola back. Do you remember the scene in Shrek where he picked up a frog and blew it into a balloon for Fiona? The frog’s eyes protruded out and his face was all puckered. That’s what I got back from these apps – a bulging-eyed monstrosity that looked nothing like Nicola. It was froggin’ weird (my Colin-Dad joke of the day), especially since, in the original image, you couldn’t even see her eyes as she appeared to be looking down at her phone.
Okay, back to what I was blabbing about…
People started adjusting the lighting on the screen grab of Nicola’s phone to extreme levels. And, there were even rumors flying around that people had superimposed Jake’s face on to the image and sent it out into the black abyss that is social media. I think I saw six different versions of the image within the first four hours of it dropping on X.
But, guess what, each time, I still saw Luke. Well, I take that back. One time, I swear I saw Johnny Bailey, which, if that had been true, I would have given Nicola a huge round of applause for being so hilariously catty about it all.
My advice, if you want to see the picture, pull it yourself. Go to YouTube, take a screen grab of it, and figure it out on your own. Do not put it through an app and don’t play with the lighting so much that it distorts the image. You may have noticed that I did not repost any of those images here. That was intentional. Form your own opinion about it.
Now that we have that out of the way – the part about me believing it was Luke on the phone screen and me suggesting you form your own opinion about it – I’ll move on to why I decided to write about this topic today.
It was because Luke did something yesterday that piqued my interest.
It wasn’t anything necessarily out of the ordinary. But, it also kind of was.
Simone Ashley posted to her grid yesterday a series of photographs. There’s nothing special here; she’s a beautiful woman putting her lovely image out into this world. It was the last picture in this slide deck that left me intrigued, though. It’s a picture of Simone – but, at the bottom left of the image, is a damn phone screen. Initially, I was a little confused by the image on the phone screen because it appeared to be Simone’s hands but also not Simone’s hands. What it was, is that the angle of the phone made the angle in which the image was depicted slightly different. Why not crop that phone out of it? Or, use a different image? Okay, whatever. I’m not sure I would have thought much of it – except Luke liked the post.
Why would this activate my little grey cells? Because it’s the first post of Simone’s in over a year that he has liked without Nicola also liking it. All throughout 2024, Luke has only liked the posts also liked by Nicola. Now, Nicola could very easily come back and like this post today or tomorrow or a week from now. She does like Simone’s posts frequently and, by Simone’s own words, Nicola and Simone are close. But, remember what I mentioned the other day. It’s the little changes that make people start giving the side eye. When taken collectively, Simone’s post, Luke’s like on the post, and the recent phone screen debacle seem, well, fucking connected in a damn funny way.
Kinda? Maybe?
I swear, I’m becoming one of those people who now plays Six Degrees to Lukola. What have I become?!
But, hey, let’s keep playing this game because, you have to admit, it IS kind of fun to speculate.
On November 10, Netflix UK dropped a post to its grid captioned “ME AND WHO???? [red heart]” The first slide in the deck is of Colin and Penelope’s wedding kiss – the one where Luke had his eyes open – and there is a red heart drawn between their chests (awe, their hearts). The remaining seven slides also include kissing couples but the red heart is drawn around their heads. The Luke and Nicola (like how I used Luke and Nicola, not Colin and Penelope this time?) picture stands out in this deck. It’s the first slide and the red heart is different than the others. And, what about that caption: “ME AND WHO????” Well, it's definitely NOT Nicola and Jake.
Is it a bit too far down the Delulu Rabbit Hole to believe Netflix would be in on a dig about “Who’s on Nicola’s phone screen?”
Perhaps.
But, remember this is also the same parent company that dropped “Nicola and Luke’s Cutest Moments” on August 28 (via Bridgerton Netflix IG), right smack dab in the middle of the Jake Festival Pap Disaster. Do you remember that? The fandom was bouncing all over the place. New festival pictures of Nicola and Jake had dropped the day before. Shondaland had also dropped a “Friends to Lovers” story that seemed oddly like Luke and Nicola. Melissa Dezarate dropped old Luke and Nicola pictures on her IG stories. Then, on August 28, Bridgerton Netflix dropped its “Cutest Moments,” and Melissa Dezarate shared more Luke and Nicola pictures on her IG stories. The “Cutest Moments,” pretty much entirely on its own (the rest was just extra frosting), turned our day right side up again. I salute you, Netflix.
Are we burrowing deeper into the Rabbit Hole? Meh. Let’s keep going.
Also on November 10, we had Dougie posting a mirror / elevator selfie to his grid with the caption, “I know it’s out of focus don’t tell me that.” Maybe he means something, maybe he doesn’t. Any ways, Jake liked this post. Now, I will admit, in the beginning of this Jake Side Story Extravaganza, I wasn’t keen on Dougie. He seemed aggressive on X – especially after those New York pap pictures dropped – but then I realized that his annoyance might be due to the narratives being spread about Jake, i.e., that he was being “hard launched” with Nicola. Recall that within a few hours of the Jake London Pap Disaster, Dougie posted to his stories an image of Jake looking at his phone with the “Mike/Sully Face Swap” meme superimposed over Jake’s face. If you research what this meme means, you’ll find that it is similar to a face-palm reaction or used for “overly ironic situations that leave you confused and perplexed.” Kind of funny, right? You’re welcome to take Dougie however you please, but over the past few weeks, I’ve become rather fond of him. He seems like a mischievous bloke, which is right up my alley.
I always have this feeling that the USS Lukola is surrounded by people who, after the ship hits a rogue wave, help to steer it back on course. The “people” come in the form of Nicola and Luke; cast, crew and friends; interviewers with their old edited-out snippets; and Netflix & Co. I’m sure I’m failing to name someone.
I shall wrap this post up with a quote from Jonathan Van Ness – who, by the way, is one of the most entertainingly funny and intelligent humans to watch. Earlier this week, JVN posted to his IG stories and Tiktok about “bobs.” With JVN, I never really know if he is being serious with what he puts out there or if we’re expected to read between the lines. Regardless, his comment was impactful to me:
“All this shit is just someone on Tiktok decided this was going to be the new name and tried to make that a trend. And that’s cool and that’s great and I love that. I just don’t want y’all getting confused. You know what I’m saying? This is just another variation of a bob.”
Take that as you please.
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🎃 Twst Halloween PSA 🎃
*pulls up the Serious Talk Chair*
Alright, so.
In the wake of the new Halloween PV posted on the TWST JP social media accounts, there’s been an explosion of hype. However, something else you may have seen circulating is people saying, "I already knew about this weeks ago!" and/or claims of having knowledge of leaked characters and costumes. Some have even directly linked to videos or images of these leaks (including fully animated character sprites) in threads discussing the next Halloween event. I myself have been sent these videos and images multiple times, unprompted, over the last few days.
To make a long story short:
You should NOT be speaking about or sharing these leaks in a public setting.
By doing so, you are running the risk of spoiling people who may not want to know these things in advance. They never gave their consent to see that, and this consent shouldn’t be assumed. I’m extremely disappointed that my own experience has been this way. I wanted the chance to react live as the information was being released. Others may feel the same as me. Additionally, openly talking about leaks is may make things more difficult for us fans in the long run.
The only reason these leaks were let out so early is because TWST started uploading assets into the game much sooner than they would actually be implemented. This has allowed dataminers in the fandom to go in and look around to see what goodies might be in store for the future. However, if fans are going to just run around blurting out what all the secrets are, it may discourage the devs from continuing to do this in the future. It will make it that much more difficult for fans to extract high quality card images ASAP. It means assets may be kept under tighter lock and key to prevent this from happening again.
Don't believe me? Something similar happened with the Japanese TWST website. The team used to upload news about the next month's schedule early, but locked behind a random string of numbers. Fans brute-forced those numbers and always managed to find the schedule sooner than it was intended to be out. The number of posts made on the website has now dropped drastically and schedules are no longer released on there. While there's no proof that these events are related, there is a real concern among some dataminers that the very same could happen regarding in-game assets.
I realize that leaks are common nowadays, but please let us at least respect other fans' rights to experience the game in their own way while also minimizing the risk of consequences for the fandom. If you must discuss these leaks at all, do it in PRIVATE. You are allowed to be excited about what's coming, but please keep it to yourselves or to your own circles where it may be a more appropriate topic.
Do not ask or talk about the leaks in my inbox, DMs, or comments. Do not link me to or share any leaks. Wait until the information has been released on official TWST social media handles, THEN I would be more than happy to talk about the news with everyone. Those who disregard this request moving forward will have their message deleted and then be blocked.
Thank you—and with that, let’s return to our regularly scheduled show!
#twst#twisted wonderland#disney twisted wonderland#notes from the writing raven#advice#disney twst#jp spoilers#twst halloween#twisted wonderland halloween#nightmare before christmas
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2-year anniversary post
My blog is now 2-years old~!
After my last anniversary post, I had quite a list of projects planned; in addition to making posts for all the upcoming SxF content, like the movie, season 2, and the video game, I had other personal projects in mind as well. I wanted to start on my Japanese Linguistic Observations in Spy x Family series, which I was able to write five posts for as of now! (I've currently exhausted all the topics I wanted to discuss for that, but I may come up with more ideas later on). There was also the Spy x Family Character Tracker, which took me a while to get motivated to do, but once I did, I'm proud of how it turned out 😃 I also made a lot of scan posts this year too, like the workbooks and my series of miscellaneous collab scans.
But compared to my last anniversary, which was at a time when there was a lot of new SxF content on the horizon, we've been in a bit of a dry spell the past several months. Hype for the aforementioned movie, game, and anime season have died down, and merch and collabs have slowed as well, since there hasn't been new anime content to promote. But I consider it the calm before the storm, lol.
This is also why my posts have gotten a little less frequent lately - there hasn't been as much new SxF content in general besides the manga chapters, and as mentioned previously, I was able to check off the projects I had wanted to do. So as of now, I don't have much new content planned in the coming year besides continuing my Chronological Analysis on Twilight and Yor series when season 3 airs (still no release date yet, but I'm betting on spring of 2025). I'll also make posts for each anime episode like I did with season 2. And of course, I'll continue my manga chapter reviews, and make merch and scan posts when I can.
I've always tried to maintain a "quality over quantity," "only write when I have something to say," mentality for the blog. I don't want to force myself to write when I'm not motivated (this is also why I don't take part in community writing projects and the like). I also have other hobbies besides SxF, so I like to focus my limited free time on those when there isn't much going on in the SxF fandom. Occasionally I think to myself, "Hm, I haven't posted on Tumblr in a while," but if there isn't anything I feel like writing about at the time, it's better if I hold off rather than force myself to churn out something uninspiring.
But as I said, I feel like we're in a calm before the storm. Season 3 will already be exciting enough, but there's a good chance more content will follow. The next Jump Festa is scheduled for late December, and as usual, SxF will have a dedicated panel with the four Forger voice actors in attendance!
The movie and season 2 were announced at this event in 2022, so there's a good chance we'll get more juicy announcements this year! Even if not another movie, I'd be happy with more artbooks, collabs, and other things down the line! There's also a good chance an idea for another SxF project will inspire me and I'll start working on that. Who knows. But I do know SxF is still a popular series with many more years of content to produce! And I look forward to seeing, and blogging about, it all 😁
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-> 𝗃𝖺𝗌𝗈𝗇 𝗍𝗈𝖽𝖽 𝗑 𝗌𝗂𝗇𝗀𝖾𝗋!𝗋𝖾𝖺𝖽𝖾𝗋
-> 𝗌𝗈𝖼𝗂𝖺𝗅 𝗆𝖾𝖽𝗂𝖺 𝖺𝗎!
-> 𝖺/𝗇: 𝗍𝗁𝗂𝗌 𝗂𝗌 𝗄𝗂𝗇𝖽 𝗈𝖿 𝖺 𝗌𝖾𝖼𝗈𝗇𝖽 𝗉𝖺𝗋𝗍 𝗍𝗈 𝗍𝗁𝖾 𝖿𝗂𝗋𝗌𝗍 𝗌𝗆𝖺𝗎 𝗂 𝗐𝗋𝗈𝗍𝖾 𝗍𝗁𝖺𝗍 𝖼𝖺𝗇 𝖻𝖾 𝖿𝗈𝗎𝗇𝖽 𝗁𝖾𝗋𝖾. 𝗍𝗁𝖾 𝗌𝗈𝗇𝗀 𝗍𝗁𝖺𝗍 𝗂 𝗋𝖾𝖿𝖾𝗋𝖾𝗇𝖼𝖾 𝗂𝗇 𝗍𝗁𝖾 𝗌𝖾𝖼𝗈𝗇𝖽 𝗁𝖺𝗅𝖿 𝗂𝗌 𝖺𝗋𝗂𝖺𝗇𝖺 𝗀𝗋𝖾𝗇𝖽𝖾'𝗌 𝗅𝖾𝖺𝗄𝖾𝖽 𝗌𝗈𝗇𝗀 "𝖿𝖺𝗇𝗍𝖺𝗌𝗂𝗓𝖾" 🫶🏿
liked by y/nforeal and 972,336 others
@rred_hood: gm yall
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user1: never wanted to be a towel so bad
user2: so i see y/n liked his post… interesting
user3: y/n bro just take him atp
⤷ user4: sis never beating the dating allegations😭
user5: i need him in the worst way bro please
@bigdickgrayson: put a shirt on skank
⤷@rred_hood: a bit much coming from bludhaven’s resident whore
user6: idk why yall always so quick to jump to conclusions. all she did was like his damn post have some decorum guys🤦♀️
⤷user4: DICK RIDAAA🗣️🗣️
⤷user7: girl he is NAWT gonna pick you💀
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Y/N Y/LN's leaked music continues to give fans hints about her relationship status, completely against the artist's wishes (8/17/2022 3:27 PM PT)
Many listeners of the singer woke up to a great surprise this morning when an anonymous twitter account posted a link to one of Y/N Y/LN's unreleased songs.
For the past few months, fans have been speculating when the artist would release more music since having been in a rumored relationship with the proclaimed gotham elite, Jason Todd. The lyrics "Boys blowin' up my phone, They just ain't you" and "I'd give this pussy to you, nine-to-five, five-to-nine" give us a clear hint of what may be going on between the two, and fans were quick to catch on.
Much to the artist's dismay, however, the song’s chorus found it way over to tiktok with over 700,000 videos having used the audio already. Many users of the app have participated in a dance trend that has already seemed to be created.
Despite all the positive feedback directed towards the singer, Y/N was not hesitant to express her irritation for the invasion of privacy. After seeing the topic trending on twitter this morning, a post was made to her account stating:
@y/nforeal: Now who tf leaked my shit?? This why yall dont ever get any music outta me😐
After doing some digging, inside sources have come to the conclusion that Artemis Grace, singer and former girlfriend of Jason, played some part in unconsentually releasing the song. Even though the two artists work under the same record label, Artemis wouldn’t do something this crazy, right?
But to nobody’s surprise, it seems that the vengeful ex has a long history of being senseless. Jason has stated in the past that the main reason he ended things with her was because she liked to have constant "control" over him. In an interview last year, he made it very clear how unhappy he was with Artemis, saying:
"She was known for taking extreme measures to make sure I stayed tied down to her. I don't really wanna get into it, but she's always had an obsession with being in the star of things, and our relationship was no exception."
While both Todd and Y/LN have yet to clear the air regarding their rumored love affair, sources still firmly believe that something is going on between them to have inspired such a song. Still, whether they wanna admit it or not, they really are super cute together. ;)
i really didn't wanna make artemis the bad guy here but i needed a plotline dawg😭
#ノ彡☆ [read all about it] — my writing#jason todd#jason todd x reader#jason todd x fem!reader#jason todd x you#jason todd fanfiction#jason todd fanfic#jason todd smau#smau#social media au#singer!reader#famous!reader#red hood#red hood x reader#red hood x you#red hood fanfiction#red hood fanfic#dc#dc fanfiction#fanfiction
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“Fuckyoufuckyoufuckyou that’s not how trauma works, Lily Orchard”
This is the last Lily critical thing I am willing to share. For context: this happened during one of Lily orchards korra streams, it was before she would release her video that I would not watch for mental health reasons, but yes this is how her streams are, so much dead air only filled with obnoxiously loud keyboard clacking, snorts, and little to no commentary.
I had been watching, while watching I caught her talking about… trauma and ptsd. I caught her (if for a moment) fully displaying her lack of genuine empathy and knowledge of the aforementioned topics. And then when the show actually has a great point about how to healthily heal and how it isn’t going to be immediate she says:
Fuck you, fuck you, fuck you. That’s not how trauma works!
As if she would actually know and have studied and actually fucking know what it’s like.
This moment had broke me… if you’ve read my essay about my healing you’d know. This is not a criticism of Lily orchard… this is me showing her true colors. I need you to see how her brain works I want you to understand how it works without getting too close and touching the metaphorical poop of this drama until you get the full vivid picture of her.
Ever since I’ve learned more and more about Lily and have truly seen and heard of the things she’s done I’ve been plagued by what I thought were the traumatic moments I felt I had eloquently unpacked and picked apart… actually reanimate and take new forms that have caused minimal spirals.
And if I’m going through this then imagine what Lily orchards victims and fans have gone and continue to go through. This isn’t about whatever card she’ll use to get away with her behavior this is addressing the actual danger of this woman.
If I ever post her again I’ll be dropping art I did as cathartic release (like the below image):
Lily clearly uses her “trauma” to hurt others. She’s transformed it into a weapon that only damages those she hits with it.
Catharsis is the key to the freeing metamorphosis of your trauma tho it may remain it weighs less as you transform more and more of it in a new way.
That transmutation can be anything, art, animation, music, sculpture and visual or physical media really! Even in writing. It’s why I like creative nonfiction as it’s really just explorative essays. Like this post you’re reading now!
So.
To wrap this up, let’s quote the gifted goose’s own mouth:
“Fuck you, fuck you, Fuck You. That’s not how trauma works, you can tell they never had it”
— Lily Orchard August 2024
#lily orchard#lily peet#lily orchard critical#lorch#lily orchard stuff#mini essay#personal writing#signal boost#lily not understanding trauma#I feel better after this :)#anti lily orchard
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Everything we know about what happened to Khan, Bakara, and Lilotte after the movie
Despite the fact that the second Dofus movie has not been made (and, from the way things are looking, might never be made at all) we know quite a bit about what happened to its characters afterward — the reason for that is simple: they're referenced in the games!
In this post, I will try to compile everything we know for the ease of access — but I implore you, instead of using my abridged compilation, just watch my video archive instead, if you're really interested in these characters! The posts I make on the MMOs are entirely recapping everything I already went over in my videos.
BAKARA JURGEN
The Dofus MMO takes place approximately 200–300 years after the events of the movie, and 70–90 years after a genocide against Huppermages has been enacted by Bonta, which forced their people to go into hiding. (you can read more about this in my posts about the Dofus MMO!)
Despite such a long time having passed, one can still find people who look up to her in the world — including Kerubim Crepin, who reminisces on having known her, her brother, and her sister-in-law, before all of them were gone...
There isn't a lot of that is known about her life (or her involvement with Khan, and whether they ever became a couple...) but what we do know is that she grew to be a very well-respected leader and role model among huppermages, and lived a long, fruitful life.
And also that, just like literally everyone in the cast of the movie, she either lied her ass off about everything that happened in it, or the legends have distorted the truth badly.
By the time of Dofus MMO, Jahash and Julith are both viewed as icons and role models by the Huppermage community. It is quite likely that, at least in part, this is the case due to Bakara's (and then Agata, her heir/apprentice/daughter-figure's) efforts to not let their memory be forgotten.
Agata never discusses Bakara in her dialogues pertaining to Bonta's genocide of Huppermages, and when coupled with Kerubim saying that Bakara is "just a part of the history now" during his own dialogue on the topic, there is a heavy implication that Bakara did not live long enough to see this tragedy — and that her passing is not a fresh wound.
LILOTTE DELAGRANDVENTURE
There is even less known about her fate, but some things are pretty obvious: she had a family of her own — and she is still venerated as a great ancestor even six centuries later, by her great-great-great grandchildren.
You can find a descendant of hers in the Wakfu MMO, as a political leader in a tradition-obiding ouginak tribe, which is a very long cry from the way Lilotte and Indie led their lives as city-dwelling ouginaks.
For context, there is a bit of a... conflict, between these two lifestyles, which makes this development quite interesting:
I feel like this dialogue just speaks for itself, when it comes to the way people like Indie, Lou, and Lilotte are viewed by Ouginaks at large...
Considering the history of oppression that Ouginaks have, it is quite understandable why a lot of them want to live in an independent community of their own people — instead of molding themselves to fit the norms set by the followers of the Twelve gods; and why they may look down on their fellow Ouginaks who do not share this sentiment.
Lilotte's bell is a known relic, and her legend is still known — albeit with major alterations, which are most likely the result of six centuries having passed.
:)
KHAN KARKASS
I have saved all content regarding him for last, because he is the one we know the most about — from the plans to include him in Welsh & Shedar, to his inclusion in the Wakfu MMO.
He is buried next to the stadium, with his Gobbowl cup — the greatest achievement of his life... despite him having years of life after it, as an adventurer. A bit sad, isn't it?
Here's what he says about his life:
And here's him getting Joris's age wrong, lmao:
I debated including what we know about him in Welsh & Shedar in this post... but it's a bit of a beaten horse, by now, so I will just give the simple rundown:
In Welsh & Shedar, Khan and Joris seem to be pretty close, reportedly having adventured together after Khan's knee injury. Khan can be seen spending time together with Joris even in the trailer.
It is easy to assume that by this point, that with Joris being 60-years-old, most other mortal loved ones of Joris's have either passed away, or had their own lives to deal with, not having much time to spend together, which is pretty sad.
Considering the fact that instead of spending his time with Bakara, he is seen alone as an old man, it might be possible that she passed away before him or that their romance did not work out.
Another reason to believe their romance may not have worked out is the fact that neither Bakara's, nor Khan's fans, mention them being an item.
He also had the stories about him morph... but somehow, I really doubt that it wasn't his own damn fault.
#bakara jurgen#wakfu#dofus#ro liveblogs dofus#krosmoz#khan karkass#lilotte#lilotte delagrandventure#bakara#maingames
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[CN] MLQC’s Lucien - Fragment Date - English Translation
⚠️ SPOILER ALERT!! ⚠️
This post contains a detailed spoiler for a date that has not been released in EN yet! Feel free to notify me if there are any mistakes in the translation~
[Warning]: The content of this date is pretty explicit and may not be suitable for individuals under the age of 17 (CN server). It is recommended that those who do not meet this age requirement refrain from proceeding beyond this point.
He traces a trail of delicate nibbles along my neck, kissing the path where life itself flows.
I feel those affectionate yet slightly demanding marks being etched again and again. For some reason, I find myself speaking without thinking.
"Bite me, Lucien."
Translation under the cut!
[T/N: This date references some dates in the past; like his Prison Date, Monochrome Scenery Exclusive Past and its Event Story, “Lab Koi” call, his Last year’s Birthday Story, and The Sea No Longer Distant MQ. Since this date has a lot of callback, I think it’d be better if you read those dates, events, and phone calls first if you haven’t :>; or at least the MQ and birthday story one because this date is also some kind of extension to those]
[Subbed Video]
youtube
[Transcript Ver]
=[Part 1]=
I wake up to the faint whirring of the fan and the subtle scent of a fruity fragrance lingering in the air. I turn over in bed, slowly blinking my eyes open.
The brilliant sunlight filters through the lace curtains, casting iridescent patches of light that dance playfully across Lucien's body.
He sits in a rattan chair by the window, flipping through a book in his hand. An exquisite purple clay tea set rests on a side table nearby.
For a fleeting, dreamlike moment, I feel like I've traveled back to the 1970s.
As if sensing my gaze, Lucien turns his head, and a hint of a smile appears in his eyes as he looks at me.
Lucien: It seems a certain lady hasn't adjusted to the time difference yet.
Lucien: It is now noon in U.S. time.
My foggy brain finally starts to turn sluggishly. I leave the bed, drag a chair over to sit beside him and yawn again.
MC: It can't be helped. It's already the wee hours in Loveland City.
Lucien: [teasingly] Oh? But as I recall, a certain night owl sometimes doesn't go to bed obediently even at those hours.
MC: [pouts] ....Hmph, you're one to talk, Mr. I-Don't-Need-Sleep!*
[T/N: MC actually calls him 进化了睡眠的人 here, which literally means “evolved sleep people”, it might be referring to him seemingly have evolved beyond the need of sleep😂]
Lucien: I've been quite well-behaved lately, haven't I? And when it comes to sleep duration, well, let's just say you're the ‘expert’.
Lucien blinks at me innocently, and I quickly take a sip of the tea he offers, hoping he won’t delve deeper into this topic.
A sweet and sour sensation blooms in my mouth. Perhaps there are other unknown herbs added, as I also detect a hint of honeyed sweetness.
✂———————–
=Flashback start=
Ten hours ago, in the dim and quiet cabin, the only sound was the occasional soft tapping of a keyboard from the seat next to me.
I lifted a corner of my eye mask and leaned closer.
MC: It's time for sleep, Professor Lucien. Didn't you say the seminar doesn't start until next week? We arrived three days early.
Lucien: That's true, but I don't plan to use this time for conference preparations.
Lucien: After all, a certain classmate expressed a desire to take this opportunity to visit my lab from my master's and Ph.D. days. I want to dedicate my time fully to you without any interruptions from other matters.
Beyond his words, I sensed other emotions in his earnest tone.
MC: [curiously] Is our Professor Lucien nervous because I'm going to visit the places where you once studied and lived?
Lucien: Yes.
He admitted it frankly, his eyes lit up as he looked at me.
Lucien: That place is very important to me.
Lucien: This feeling is like... inviting you to step into a chapter of my past.
Lucien: It should be a proper occasion, something worth your anticipation.
=Flashback end=
✂———————–
As I step out the door, a wave of heat washes over me. Thankfully, the house is nestled among the trees, providing some relief from the sweltering heat.
Lucien leads me down the stone steps, deeper into the verdant greenery. The lively apple trees grow abundantly, and even the breeze seems to carry a sweet fragrance.
The bed-and-breakfast he booked is located within Carver Estate Farm, not far from the lab. Since it's still early, we decided to take a stroll in the farm's orchard first.
MC: Now I finally feel like I'm truly on an American farm—
Lucien: The furniture and decor in that room can indeed be a bit misleading.
Lucien: That said, the radio and clock in the living room are just decorative pieces, and the stainless steel kettle in the kitchen is also fixed to the table.
Lucien: As for the fan and the TV, including the sewing machine, they actually work and can somewhat be considered "antiques.”
MC: When did you…
Lucien: [chuckles] The wait while you're asleep feels endless*, so I have to keep myself busy.
[T/N: Lucien uses the word "难熬" (literally means hard to bear) to describe his feelings while waiting for MC to wake up. Rather than feeling annoyed, the original sentence conveys a sense of longing and impatience, emphasizing how much he misses her so the wait feels unbearable]
Seeing him speak so seriously, I can't help but give his palm a gentle pinch.
Lucien: To be honest, I was a bit curious. I didn't expect the owner to maintain this style, or rather, deliberately preserve it.
MC: Have you been here before?
Lucien: Mm, Dr. Lawson brought the entire lab here before.
✂———————–
[T/N: Dr. Lawson was Lucien's mentor during his Master's and PhD years, in those years Lucien also had some seniors like Colt, Caroline, and Elliot. You can read more in Monochrome Scenery Exclusive Past. It can be said that the time during his Master’s and PhD years was the 'happiest' for him, after he abandoned his name and before he met MC. This young boy discovers that he’s not the only genius in this world. Surprisingly, this isn’t a bad thing; because being considered a genius had previously isolated him from his peers, but being surrounded by other geniuses provides him with a taste of mundane life… although he can’t fully taste it due to Black Swan’s pressure :"]
✂———————–
=[Part 2]=
Lucien: I remember it was autumn. We had just finished a phase of our experiment.
Lucien: The process of this experiment was very prolonged, and almost everyone expended a lot of effort. Fortunately, the results exceeded expectations.
Lucien: As a celebration, or perhaps simply out of a need for a break, Dr. Lawson suggested an outing after the experiment concluded.
MC: Sounds like a team-building activity?
Lucien: [chuckles] You could say that.
Lucien smiles lightly.
Lucien: At first, we all thought it would just be a matter of finding a nice restaurant, having a meal and chatting, or going to the theater to watch a performance.
Lucien: It wasn't until everyone received an email from Dr. Lawson that we realized we had been granted a mandatory five-day vacation. And the destination was this very farm estate.
MC: Pfft, Dr. Lawson is quite ceremonious about giving everyone a day off~ So, did everyone just obediently accept the arrangement?
I notice Lucien pausing, lost in thought, which is unusual for him. Then, a smile spreads on his lips.
Lucien: [chuckles] Not exactly.
Lucien: Eventually, everyone practically treated this place as a lab annex, almost bringing in equipment. Fortunately, the farm owner was an old friend of Dr. Lawson's, so we weren't kicked out.
MC: Hahaha, I knew it!
As we walk deeper into the apple orchard, the intertwined branches and leaves block out the sunlight, creating a vast expanse of shade. Vibrant red apples dot the lush greenery, looking especially tempting.
Lucien: The farm owner is an elderly Chinese gentleman. It's said that he and his wife came here to live when they were young, and this apple orchard was also planted by them with their own hands.
MC: No wonder. I think I suddenly understand why the house's decor feels so nostalgic.
Lucien: Perhaps it's precisely because they've been away for so long that they need tangible things to solidify those memories.
The swaying shadows of the trees dance in his deep eyes, and even though he's talking about someone else, I feel like I'm hearing unspoken words meant for himself.
So I rise on my tiptoes and cup his face, turning it towards me.
MC: So today, little Lucien is revisiting his old stomping grounds~ And as such an accomplished young professor, no less!
MC: This memory is very precious, and it's important to solidify it well.
Lucien: Is that so?
His voice is soft as he lowers his eyelashes and gazes into my eyes.
I feel like my entire being is almost seen through by him. He doesn't say a word, just keeps looking at me.
MC: Why are you staring at me?
Lucien: [chuckles] I'm solidifying this memory.
MC: Um?
Lucien: Because I'm not just here by myself.
Lucien: Today, I'm revisiting this place with my girlfriend. I want to look closely, carefully, and remember your appearance clearly.
I can't help but laugh, my fingertips brushing against his earlobe.
MC: Then how about remembering a bit more~ What else did little Lucien do here?
Lucien: I ate the apples.
MC: ....That doesn't count!
Lucien: Of course it counts. To be precise, it was an apple feast, with apple pie, apple muffins, apple salad, apple stew…
MC: Stop...! You're making me dizzy just looking at these apple trees now.
MC: I feel like they're saying to me, "I'm apple pie, I'm apple muffin…”
I dramatically shake my head and point to the huge fruits hanging above us.
Lucien seems amused by my actions. Seizing the moment, he smoothly takes my hand and plucks the apple hanging closest to us.
Lucien: [chuckles] Then let's eat them all, one by one.
He finishes speaking and even "conjures" a thin blanket from his bag, spreading it on the ground. He pulls me, who is still processing the moment, to sit under the tree.
His seamless actions leave me completely unable to keep up with him, and my questions come out in a jumble.
MC: C- Can we just pick the apples here? And sit down like this? And this blanket…
Lucien: I told you waiting for you to wake up feels endless, and I wasn't lying.
He looks as if he knows I can't do anything about him, and his tone, though seemingly aggrieved, is full of triumph.
We sit side-by-side under the tree, falling into a brief silence. The wind gently blows, as if not wanting to disturb this tranquility.
Lucien & MC: What are you thinking about?
Suddenly, we speak at the same time, and the unexpected coincidence makes us look at each other and laugh.
MC: You go first~
Lucien: I was wondering if an apple might fall on my head.
He says it so seriously that I find it rather cute. On a whim, I get up, pluck an apple, and then gently tap him on the head.
MC: Knock knock…
Lucien seems surprised by my action, the light in his pupils flickers.
Lucien: [gently] What about you?
MC: Me…
I smile sheepishly.
MC: I thought of a fairy tale, Prince... Snow White.
Lucien: But that's not how I remember the story?
MC: Because… this is a story I imagined!
Lucien nods thoughtfully, not minding my nonsense at all, but instead curving his eyes in a good mood.
Lucien: Then in your story, who are you?
This question stumps me for a moment, and I pause to think seriously before answering.
MC: I'm the magic mirror.
Lucien: Because the magic mirror knows everything?
MC: [smiles softly] Not really, it's because the magic mirror only looks at...the prince.
MC: And if I were the magic mirror, I wouldn't need you to ask, I'd tell you that—
MC: Lucien is the most handsome, the most intelligent, the most amazing, and the person I love the most in this entire world.
My voice is not loud, yet it feels like the entire orchard of apples has heard it. Their already gorgeous red blushing even deeper, making their vibrancy impossible to conceal.
My clamorous heart seems to be thoroughly exposed by the sun, allowing me to distinctly feel its beating and clearly see the smile filling Lucien's eyes.
He lowers his head, takes a bite of the apple in his hand, and lies down without hesitation.
Our hands, which have been holding each other all along, pull me slightly forward because of his sudden movement.
MC: …!
Lucien lies lazily on the plush blanket, each strand of hair scattering softly, as if quietly outlining his innermost feeling at this moment.
His already loose shirt falls open completely, revealing a patch of skin.
He gently blinks and the corners of his lips slightly curl up.
Under the scorching heat, the apples hanging from the branches exude an even more enticing fragrance.
The wind gathers from afar, wave after wave, sweeping through the villa, the woods, and each apple tree, carrying an increasingly rich scent toward us.
His fingertip traces mine, gently caressing the sensitive skin between my thumb and index finger.
It's like some kind of seduction.
Lucien: [whispers hoarsely] Miss Magic Mirror, I've been poisoned.
His voice is soft as if melting into the sunlight, yet it possesses a bewitching power that makes one willingly lean closer to him.
Lucien: You can kiss me now.
✂———————–
[T/N: Prince Snow White and Miss Magic Mirror… it’s a reference to his second Halloween date; Prison Date! Also, I love the way it seamlessly fits in the theme of ‘lover is like a mirror’ from last year's kiss SP; Blooming Amidst Turbulent Desires MQ... perhaps by seeing your lover's eyes you can see the real and complete you :”. And unique to Lucien, it could be that only through seeing his reflection in her eyes can he perceive the colorful version of himself]
✂———————–
=[Part 3]=
After buying some apple cookies at the farm store and making a reservation for apple cider making tomorrow, we drive to Dr. Lawson's lab.
The asphalt road under the shade of the trees glistens in the summer light. In the distance, sailboats glide on the river and people cycle along the riverbank.
Perhaps it's due to the fluttering anticipation in my heart, but the half-hour drive feels like it's over in the blink of an eye.
✂———————–
Lucien: Dr. Lawson is giving a lecture in London this week, and the current head of the lab is my senior, Colt. After graduation, he stayed on to continue the research.
Lucien: But he happens to be leading a group of students in an academic exchange with another lab today…
Lucien pauses for a moment, moves the gift bag he just placed on the desk to the side, and takes a sticky note off the computer screen.
Lucien: [quietly reading the sticky note] …..
He waves the sticky note at me, and I can clearly see the lively handwriting on it: "Enjoy: )".
Lucien: It seems like no one will be back today. In that case, let's graciously accept this invitation to enjoy ourselves.*
[T/N: "恭敬不如从命" means “it's more respectful to follow a request than to decline it out of politeness.” In this case, rather than refusing Colt's invitation, they graciously accept and agree to enjoy the day as requested]
✂———————–
The white walls make the spacious corridor even brighter. Along the way, the walls of classrooms and laboratories are adorned with various awards and patent certificates.
It seems that just by passing through, one can feel countless figures with unceasing footsteps, moving forward persistently and rationally, knocking on one unknown door after another.
✂———————–
Lucien: The desk by the window was the place I most often sat in the lab. Because I always sat there, it eventually became my ‘workstation’.
Lucien: Even if I arrived late, everyone would save this seat for me;
Lucien: [chuckles] But I don't really have a fixed seat in the library. I've never known if those people who are already looking up information early in the morning are actually early risers or if they just never went to bed;
Lucien: Occasionally, when the weather was nice, professors would take us out to the lawn for class;
Lucien: This vending machine used to swallow coins. I wonder if it's been fixed…
Lucien leads me through the corridor, past the small garden, into classrooms, laboratories, and the library…
Perhaps even he himself hasn't realized it, but returning here has made him happy.
It's in the little things he doesn't even realize he's doing: the way his steps quicken without him noticing, the instinctive caress of his fingertips against my palm, the soft murmurs he makes when he notices something different from his memories.
And even the hint of joy as he reveals those past memories with me.
He leads me by the hand through every nook and cranny of this place, making me feel as if I'm walking through his youth.
Finally, we arrive at the dormitory building.
Lucien: Generally, everyone lives here. They're mostly single rooms, so you have a lot of privacy.
MC: I remember you mentioned it before, so is this the common lounge area?
In this not-so-large space in front of us, several sofas and coffee tables are neatly arranged, and the bar counter displays simple everyday items.
Lucien: Mm, usually everyone relaxes here while waiting for experiment results. Occasionally, we also play a round of NOU.
MC: Pfft, I didn't expect this kind of leisure activity.
Lucien: [chuckles] To be precise, it's a traditional activity.
Sensing an interesting topic, I quickly shake his hand and press for more details.
MC: What else? What other things do you do?
Lucien thinks for a moment, then suddenly smiles.
Lucien: There's actually one interesting thing.
Lucien: In the past, before important experimental results were concluded, everyone would tacitly let a certain colleague touch the experiment machine a few more times, and then pray to it.
Lucien: And often, the results wouldn't be too bad, and there was a high probability of exceeding expectations.
MC: Hahaha, so he's the ‘lab koi’ you were talking about!
[T/N: It’s a reference to the “Lab Koi” call from last year!]
Lucien nods, the warm white light tracing the contours of his face, making his features appear even softer.
I can hear the nostalgia in his voice that he unintentionally revealed, and I know that he might be thinking about a lot of things at this moment.
I'm reluctant to break this brief silence*, my gaze subconsciously drifting towards this lounge, as if I could catch a glimpse of the genius boy who had once been here.
[T/N: The phrase "不舍得" (bù shě de) expresses a reluctance or unwillingness to part with something precious or cherished. While the English translation "reluctant" conveys the general idea, it might not fully capture the way MC cherishes this rare moment of Lucien being so nostalgic that she's reluctant to break🤧]
Suddenly, my attention is drawn to the wall next to the bar counter.
It's a small display wall. Besides showcasing some achievement certificates of past researchers, there's also a handwritten message board and some photos.
It turns out there will always be someone who earnestly preserves and longs for the past, with all its time and traces.
I quickly find a familiar figure among them.
It's a slightly blurry photo, almost as if it were a frame grabbed from a video.
The boy surrounded by the crowds slightly widened his eyes, a bouquet of flowers was thrust into his arms as he let the others boisterously tease and laugh around him.
Lucien: [chuckles, his voice exclaims a little in surprise] ...So, I really was quite surprised back then.
Lucien quietly walks up behind me at some point, his gaze intently fixed on this photo.
The world is truly a wondrous place. It appears to operate according to established principles, yet it often defies logic.
Those emotions that he never understood in the past are now brought before him in some fateful way, regaining their meaning and significance.
Lucien gazes at the girl beside him, observing her happiness and surprise, witnessing all the beautiful emotions that have blossomed because of him.
But she has no idea that her existence has allowed him to see how beautiful the world is.
Lucien's gaze slowly returned to the photo.
Countless colorful ribbons flutter in the air, shimmering and sparkling. The colors, engraved with blessings and well-wishes, seem to transcend time, flowing into his eyes in this very moment.
He speaks softly.
Lucien: It turns out that day was actually so lively.
✂———————–
The last scene is about his Last year’s Birthday Story! He graduated with his PhD on his birthday. This graduation was celebrated by his seniors and professor. At that time, everything was monochrome in his eyes. However, visiting the place with MC and seeing his graduation photo with her brings color to a memory that was once only in black and white. He now realizes how lively and vibrant that day truly was.
✂———————–
=[Part 4]=
MC: Are you saying that Senior Brother Colt and Senior Sister Caroline being together was something specifically emailed to you?
Lucien gives a helpless smile.
Lucien: Their reasoning was that I'd receive the information faster by email, and it turns out they were absolutely right.
MC: Hahaha!
We walk back, laughing and chatting. Along the way, I listen to Lucien share stories from his past that he seldom opens up about, about the later developments of his companions, and their current situations.
Some things he tells me without much recollection, while others he needs to think about for a moment. But it seems that the process of remembering makes him a bit happier.
One intersection away from the farm, we pass by a market and stop to buy some food.
Lucien: I'll take the things to the car first, wait for me here.
MC: Okay~ I'll be right here at the market.
While waiting for Lucien to get the car, I notice a stall at the market.
A silver-haired grandma is engrossed in weaving bracelets, her stall filled with dazzling beaded ornaments that shimmer under the soft glow of the glass lamps.
Suddenly, an idea strikes me, and I walk towards the stall.
✂———————–
MC: Ah, it's so hot.
As soon as I enter the house, I hurriedly turn on the air conditioner and fan.
Although the temperature here is still quite pleasant compared to the summer in Loveland City, I’m probably still jet-lagged that I feel a little dizzy.
Struggling to fight the rising drowsiness, I sort and organize the purchased items with Lucien.
Lucien: How about having dinner at the farm's eco-restaurant tonight? That way you can sleep earlier and won't be too tired.
Lucien: Or should we go somewhere farther to try some local specialties?
MC: Either is fine with me~ But before we eat, I need to do something important first.
I arrange the washed apples in a fruit bowl and pull Lucien to sit down with me.
I fish the woven bracelet I bought earlier from the stall out of my pocket. I pull his arm towards me and carefully, with a sense of cherishing, fasten the bracelet around his wrist.
Lucien clasps my wrist in return, his gaze shifting from the bracelet to me, as if waiting for an explanation.
MC: It's just... I suddenly wanted to give you something.
MC: Maybe it's because I saw your photos in the lounge earlier, or maybe it's because I heard so much about your past today.
MC: Even though I knew what those days truly meant to you, it wasn't until I actually went there that I realized…
MC: Everything about Lucien has been well treasured.
He's looking at me, hanging on to my every word.
MC: I'm so lucky to have picked them up again and to have pieced them together with you.
MC: To let them become you, the complete person standing before me.
Gazing into his eyes and seeing the one and only figure reflected there, I feel surprisingly calm and settled inside.
I gently caress his wrist twice.
MC: You see, I tied this knot myself! And I picked out this little agate bead super carefully. Don't you think it's pretty?
MC: It can be like the apple that falls on your head and sparks inspiration or the one that tempts you to be curious about everything.
MC: But now, it is also the "apple" I am giving to you.
MC: [smiles softly] Lucien, I hope the present me can also become a special fragment, forever remaining in your memories.
Pinkish-purple hues gently paint the horizon, and a beam of light happens to fall in, illuminating the agate bead.
The smooth texture is brightly highlighted, making the color seem to dance, leaping into those beautiful dark eyes.
Lucien: [softly] Indeed… very vibrant.
Lucien: Like an apple.
As he says this, he looks at me, his brows and eyes curving into a beautiful arc, leaving me momentarily unsure of what exactly he's referring to.
MC: Then let’s go eat…!
My cheeks start to feel warm as I belatedly realize what he means, and as I try to rise from his embrace, an irresistible force pulls me back onto his lap.
The arm wrapped around my waist tightens slightly, deepening the embrace.
Lucien: [whispers seductively] Before that, I also have something important to do.
He lowers his head, kissing the little agate bead cherishingly, then gently moves his kisses to my fingertips resting on his wrist, his lips slowly trailing upward, inch by inch.
Each kiss is feather light and slow, as if he’s carefully tracing every detail, until every part of my skin is stained with his warmth.
Lucien: MC.
He gives my earlobe another gentle peck before pulling back slightly, creating a small distance between us.
Lucien: [softly] Today, I've felt the significance of those seemingly meaningless moments from the past.
Lucien: It turns out there are many other people in my dreams.
[T/N: This part is what I mean by the date being the extension of last month's MQ (The Sea No Longer Distant MQ). It can be said that on this date, Lucien finally understands what MC means in that MQ. It's like... growing a 'heart' and feeling emotions that he doesn't comprehend before. He's lucky to have many people willing to ‘dream’ together with him🥺]
His abrupt change of topic leaves me momentarily confused as if he’s speaking in riddles. It takes me a moment to catch up and understand what he’s talking about.
Memories of the beach from a month ago flood back. I look into those eyes that are still fixed on me, and I seem to see emotions in them that weren't there before.
Lucien: You're right. People are complex, and they're also greedy.
Lucien: Because of you, I've accepted many things, and as a result, I desire even more.
Lucien: I'm curious about what other changes I'll experience because of you, and what surprises you'll bring me.
Lucien: And besides curiosity, there's also expectation.
I tilt my head up and kiss the corner of his lips.
MC: Then keep being curious about me.
MC: I like that you're curious about me.
I reach out to touch Lucien's face, wanting to look more clearly into his eyes.
Lucien: [whispers softly] Miss Magic Mirror, can you tell me…
Lucien: In your eyes, what am I like at this very moment?
I can't help but laugh.
MC: Right now, your eyes are the color of the entire sky. They're so beautiful.
MC: Your hair is bestowed with the warm glow of the setting sun, looking soft and fluffy. Your lips…
As I talk, I give him another kiss.
MC: It makes me want to do this.
Lucien also starts laughing.
MC: Lucien, right now, everything about you is complete in my eyes, and I can see you clearly.
He leans down again, his warm and moist breath brushing against my neck as he kisses me, causing subtle tingling sensations on my skin.
I instinctively try to pull away, but as I reach out to hold onto the back of his neck, he firmly holds me in place.
My legs dangle, unable to find a foothold, forcing me to use all my strength to hook onto his lap, while my other hand blindly grabs onto the curtain.
The crimson sunset spills over us unrestrainedly. As if dazzled by the spots of light, Lucien lifts me towards him, shifting a little as he holds me.
Amid the rocking motion, his leg accidentally touches the nearby coffee table, making a noise.
The sudden weightlessness makes me instinctively tighten my arms, causing him to gently bite my collarbone.
His scorching breath brushes against my neck like a feather, his scent overwhelming and filling every corner. It mingles with the fruity fragrance in the air, creating an even more alluring aroma.
Out of the corner of my eye, the goldfish in the fish bowl seem startled as well, swaying and swinging, leaving behind two tangled and intertwined trails*.
The skin grazed by my fingertips starts to burn, and I'm getting hot too.
Lucien: [whispers hoarsely] MC, you make me feel a gentle gaze.
Right now, we probably can't see each other's expressions, but it's as if we can see everything.
His low, hoarse voice resonates against my neck, and his moving lips make my throat vibrate, as though his words and voice have become my own.
Lucien: [x2] Make me feel truly seen by you, deeply loved by you**.
Lucien: [x3] Make me… feel happy and satisfied.
He traces a trail of delicate nibbles along my neck, kissing the path where life itself flows.
I feel those affectionate yet slightly demanding marks being etched again and again. For some reason, I find myself speaking without thinking.
MC: Bite me, Lucien.
The rustling of clothes suddenly stops, and his breathing also ceases, as if he is holding his breath.
I know my face is burning bright red, but I only shyly embrace him, moving myself even closer to him.
MC: I've also been seen by you and possessed by you.
In the sweaty air, I hear his long, drawn-out breath.
But in the next moment, they are all swept into my lips and tongue, obtaining all my oxygen in a different way.
Lucien: [kisses and pants] It is because you possess me that I am complete.
Lucien: [x2] Please keep possessing me forever… MC.
Lucien: [x3] In this world, only you will possess this kind of me.
.
.
.
———FIN———–
[T/N]
*: The fish in the bowl description might seem out of place, but it's not! It alludes to '鱼水之欢' (lit. 'the joy of fish and water'), which is a Chinese idiom that describes the joy and intimacy of sexual intercourse or the metaphor for the act itself. It's also an idiom that is a metaphor for the intimate and harmonious emotional or sexual life of men and women.
**: This is my favorite line in this because of the way it emphasizes Lucien's feeling of being understood and cherished 🤧 “看见" (kàn jiàn, to see) has the connotation of being acknowledged and truly understood. I think, for Lucien, being ‘seen’ and understood is significant; understanding the world is his thing as a scientist, so when someone makes an effort to understand him, it means a lot to him. Then the use of directly spoken “爱” (ài) which is a very, very sentimental word to say compared to how the west uses ‘love’ regularly… and the way it also encompasses a sense of enduring love, a sense of care, cherishing, and protectiveness🥺
Those last lines!!!!! Under her gaze, he feels utterly seen, completely known, and thus, entirely himself. It's because she possesses him fully that he feels complete. While others in his life may hold only fragments of him, she alone possesses his entirety. As the fox says in "The Little Prince," “But if you tame me, then we shall need each other. To me, you will be unique in all the world. To you, I shall be unique in all the world.” It is through her 'taming' that his completeness becomes something uniquely hers and hers alone.
And as Lucien mentioned in the Radio Broadcast Date, his form of possessiveness goes beyond one-sided control or dominance. Rather than just possessing her, he longs even more for her to possess him. To let her influence and 'change' him. Their possessiveness is a two-way thing: just as he is insatiable and wants all of her, he also craves to belong to the one he loves and to surrender himself entirely. After all, possessiveness is also a form of exceptional cherishing of the other party (his words in radio broadcast date, not mine), and he enjoys the feeling of being cherished and loved in this way.
#those last lines are CRAZY with the panting and kissing noises hjdhjbdsbsdhsf#why this man happiness make me more teary-eyed than when he straight up sad sob sob#his unconscious happiness just make me WEEP#mlqc lucien#mr love queen's choice#mlqc cn#mlqc spoiler#mlqc#mlqc translation#mr. love queen's choice#mr love lucien#mlqc xu mo#mlqc spoilers#Youtube
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The Queer Subtext of the CATFA Bar Scene
(Long post, alt text included)
While there are countless examples of evidence to support the idea that Steve & Bucky had romantic tension, none stick out to me quite like the bar scene in catfa
In this post, I will go over the reasons this scene is so important to their relationship
First of all, let’s talk about the heartfelt conversation the two were having prior to Peggy’s arrival. Bucky expressing his admiration for Steve’s bravery, before and after the serum, as he specifies:
This scene displays Bucky’s admiration for Steve, no matter what he looks like. One of my favorite lines.
Not to mention this totally not-subtle remark…
Now let’s talk about the painfully obvious jealousy Bucky showed while Steve and Peggy were flirting. He even started passive-aggressively “flirting” with Peggy while she and Steve were eye-fcking.
Through heteronormative eyes, this may look like Bucky’s jealous of Steve’s new status as “ladies-man”. But if you truly know their characters, you know that’s not true.
As if his jealousy wasn’t already evident enough, look at the death-stare he gives Peggy as she walks away. He is FURIOUS 😭
A new bout of evidence for the queer subtext of this scene was conjured by episode 1 of what if..? when marvel was desperately trying to force feed us steggy, they accidentally confirmed a stucky theory.
In what if, there’s a romantic scene with Steve and Peggy at a bar, and they were interrupted by bucky just before they were going to kiss… sound familiar?
Marvel has been aggressively trying to get us invested in steggy post-endgame, and has done so by attempting to erase Steve and Bucky’s relationship entirely. This is even more evident in the Disneyland adaptation of “Rogers: the musical” adapted from the Hawkeye series.
Now the last topic is, in my opinion, the most evident of Steve and buckys romantic subtext. That is, of course, the song choice of the bar scene.
Throughout the scene, the howling commandos and others can be heard singing “there is a tavern in the town”. How exactly does this confirm stucky? Well let’s look at the lyrics…
Come ON these lyrics perfectly describe buckys POV during this scene. This song choice was no accident in this essay I will 😤
There’s actually a YouTube video that points this “coincidence” out! I recommend you watch so you can see what I mean:
youtube
In conclusion? Bucky was undoubtedly in love with Steve and this scene is a certified stevebucky classic
thanks for reading <3
#stucky#it’s so painfully obvious goddamn#originally posted this on Twitter but hopefully it’ll gain more traction here lol#captain america#catfa#steve rogers#bucky barnes#stevebucky#Youtube
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Okay time for another small (I hope) analysis on IWTV, mainly the way it's written and its place on current television. I'll try my best to format this so it's not ramblings all over, I promise.
IWTV and plot points
I watched a good amount of television in my time, and one thing I noticed here is the fact that it doesn't hold your hand. It doesn't tell you "hey, this thing x is important, now we will tell again why x is important, now here see x being used, the important thing we talked about so far, did you remember, audience?".
Let's take as an example the "don't drink the blood of the living" thing. It's said to a young Louis (telling also to the audience in the 2nd episode how vampirism in this setting works) and then every time it's brought up it's indirectly (Lestat spitting out the sick man's blood, we see Claudia buying Laudanum and we know what it will be used for, but they don't tell us "Hey, Claudia is planning to poison someone so that Lestat drinks it, because remember audience, dead blood kills them"). Sometimes not only it doesn't hold your hand, but shoves you in a different direction, especially in S2. It contradicts himself, backtracks and then it's up to you to spot it.
For example, attentive viewers may have noticed that Sam was in 2 places at once in the trial, one episode before the actual reveal. It isn't a gotcha they came up with in the finale to give more gravitas to the revelation. When they tell us Lestat mass manipulated the audience, it makes sense for the storyline too because we already saw him do that with the soldiers, we have a previous example to refer to, Armand never used that particular power.
In a time where we see so many social media adopt the "short videos" gimmick, like reels and shorts etc, having a piece of media that references back in this way is super refreshing.
2. Character complexity
Complex characters are the backbone of this show. It's easy to place a character in a box and leave them there. You see it with the stereotype of the villain, the best friend, the hero. Some tv shows may have the character shift into a different box, but it's almost never permanent (think of the times where a hero gets corrupted by the Evil Power, but then reverts back to their hero status after Defeating the Evil Power because they remembered the Power of Friendship).
We have Louis, well meaning vampire who is capable of horrible deeds when pushed to the brink. Lestat, who feels so much to the point it hurts the people around him. Armand, whose trauma and fear bring out the need to control, but at the same time he needs to do that without actually controlling. They are all these things at the same time, and it's impossible to see them in a black and white perspective.
3. Details
A line almost always has its parallels to another line in the show, gazes always mean something, props are detailed and shown (I made a post looking at Daniel's notes in 2x05, which were shown for a second only, but you can also think about Claudia's diaries, all handwritten, or the astonishing amount of folders that were in Daniels computer from the Talamasca. That is all prop work done to be shown for a few seconds at most).
4. Analysis
This is more of a fandom thing than the show itself, but I was suprised by the amount of deep analysis that people here on Tumblr did (but also on other social media). Long essays on the meaning of a scene, or on the many many topics the show brings to light (the fallacy of memory, the impact of trauma, the meaning of free will and agency).
Similarly lots of people said that the show brought them back the urge to start creating, whether it's gifs, video essays, edits, fanart, fics, what have you. I started going back to Tumblr after years (last time I was here was during S4 of Sherlock).
And I feel like this is only possible if you give your audience something to work with, something to talk about and to dissect, rather than simple "entertainment".
5. Final thoughts
Of course, this isn't to say IWTV is error free, all perfect, without flaws. Nor is it the only one that has had this amount of labor and impact. But it's still miles ahead from most media we have available at the moment in my opinion, and I really hope its success brings other showrunners or directors to want to try and dare, to trust in their audience, to avoid shortcuts and to pour love in their creation.
If you got this far, I just want to thank you for taking the time to read my ramblings again! Have a cute Louis as a reward, and see you next time :)
#iwtv#interview with the vampire#iwtv meta#iwtv amc#iwtv analysis#daniel molloy#armand#louis de pointe du lac#lestat de lioncourt
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Attention JSE Community: Important
PLEASE REBLOG
This will probably blow up in my face, but something needs to be said. Besides, anyone who comes after me for this supports genocide, so. Whatever. Free blocklist if anyone sends me hate anons.
There's a person in the community, who runs a few blogs you may know, which you'll want to block if a) you're Palestinian or b) you wholeheartedly oppose the genocide taking place against them. I'm going to provide context, then list the blogs you'll want to block.
Back in November or so, when I first started reblogging pro-Palestine posts, I as an American wasn't as informed at the time about the war going on as I am now. Like any sensible American, I fully expected that any major media source I'd be given info from would be feeding me propaganda or just lies in general. (I'm right but I digress). As soon as I started reblogging pro-Palestine posts, I got concerned asks from two anonymous Israeli people who were formerly veteran followers of mine (one had been following me for at least 6 years). I thought their concern was reasonable, given I doubted the media sources I'd be most likely to get information from. I offered to let them correct me if I reblogged misinformation, assuming America would lie to me about both sides of the war, because of course I want to ensure I'm not perpetuating misinfo.
Mind you, I only reblogged 3 types of pro-Palestine posts: charity signal boosts, posts BY Palestinians, and videos of actual literal real life footage of proof or interviews about what Israeli forces are doing to Palestine and its people.
The anons I was getting started getting angrier, more aggressive, and guilt-trippy. I'm not sure which post was their last straw, but either the main anon (the one following me 6+ years) or BOTH anons I had previously heard from attacked me in my askbox calling me antisemitic and saying other nasty things because I was supporting Palestine. The main anon guilt-tripped me and straight up claimed Israel is not harming Palestine whatsoever, in other words denying the genocide is happening. Then they unfollowed me. This person owns the blogs I'm going to list to you.
I haven't heard from this main anon or the other one on Tumblr since, however they both were, until recently, also in a JSE Community theorist server I mod in, and recently blew up in there after the server mods declared their support for Palestine. The server owners AND the mods have been getting hate anons from Zionists (presumably the two anons sending multiple asks) for the last few days because of it, just like I did when I kept reblogging pro-Palestine posts.
One of the two anons, I'm unsure which, also owned a blog called @/hamas-is-isis, which is now inactive and/or deleted. You can still block the blog regardless just to be safe. Whichever anon didn't own the blog was reblogging its posts. So both anons supported the blog to say the least.
NOTE: DO NOT INTERACT WITH THESE BLOGS. ONLY BLOCK THEM. THIS POST IS NOT INTENDED TO CAUSE HARASSMENT, ONLY AWARENESS.
The main anon, the one denying the genocide is happening, owns the following blogs, two of which are/were major community blogs (which is why I'm fully expecting this to blow up in my face somehow).
@/theoristsden
@/hug-bot
@/aceofspades-lena (this is the main anon & possibly the owner of @/hamas-is-isis)
I strongly urge anyone who sees this post to block them, because I and at least 6 other people I will not name to avoid them getting harassed further, have witnessed this person being legitimately malicious towards Palestine and the topic of it. Again, they sent me an ask denying that Israel was hurting Palestinian people.
The second anon, the server mods realized today, had previously been sending subtle Islamophobic dogwhistle art in the server. We didn't catch it until after it came out that they're Zionists. Obviously, for any members of the server who see this that may be concerned, the mods have now deleted that art. The following blogs are theirs and I'm urging anyone who sees this to block them too:
@/phantomhunt
@/spacetimesystem
On the spacetimesystem blog, there are other sideblogs they listed in their pinned post if you want to go as far as to block those too.
I won't share it on this post, but the mods of the server I mentioned have screenshot proof of some of the hate anons that have been sent (I don't have any of the ones I got months ago unfortunately), as well as some other things these two have said. We also have a screenshot of the art.
I also want to mention, we found them discussing the idea of making a JSE community space that would "accept them." If you see Discord invites floating around, be wary. You could unknowingly be joining a Zionist-owned, anti-Palestine server.
Absolutely mind-boggling to me that these two would do all this or be this way when the charity that Sean supported for Thankmas this year is helping Palestinians. Not to mention he just straight up doesn't want hateful people in his community at all. But I digress.
Anyway, I urge you to block the blogs I listed. At least one of them is genuinely malicious and has attacked multiple people on anon over voicing support for Palestine. The other made art that implied Palestinians are monsters.
Free Palestine, and stay safe.
And once more: DO NOT INTERACT WITH THE LISTED BLOGS. ONLY BLOCK. I AM NOT MAKING THIS POST LOOKING TO GET ANYONE HARASSED.
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[The future of this BLOG]: SHOWS I'm planning on analyzing here & on YouTube
Interview with the vampire
Invincible
House of the dragon
The boys
Umbrella acadamy
Bridgerton probably (still haven't had time to watch part 2 yet)
stranger things: I have mixed feelings about reviewing it given what certain staff has said and done. I oscilate between wanting to review the final season or wanting to boycott it (especially as someone who has been part of the BDS movement for 1/2 her life). But, on one hand, It's not the fault of the underpaid (and talented) writers and staff who don't have these views. And I do believe some of the writing staff may have good intentions and want to give us a positive and powerful message to the audience about healing from childhood tr*uma. However, other members of the writing staff may just want to go down the stereotypical and popular-easy route. We'll just have to wait and see what happens in the last season. If I hear the ending isn't simply another re-hashing of prior seasons and it's more like s1-2 (without the cliches of s3-4). I'd be more inclined to review it by *cough* and watching it elsewhere. Once I was logged back on to tumblr: I did have a whole draft saved about my politics since I was a kid and why I still feel so strongly about such conflicts, today . But, I shouldn't make the topic about me- and I'm not sure anyone wants to hear my life story XD. So, the big point (to my followers) is regardless of whether I chose to watch it or boycot it-
I'm not deleting the old ST content: so do what you want with it (like, reblog, add details to reblogs I didn't notice). Have fun :D !
Analyzing ST certainly helped me improve in terms of media literacy (and it'll be beneficial for the future content I make). So even if it sometimes got messy here, I do appreciate all the positives the ST blog and followers brought to me.The kind words meant a lot. For those who want to unfollow me for my political beliefs , that's totally fine. That's your prerogative. For those who want to unfollow cause again ST was pretty much my whole blog: again I TOTALLY understand and I wish you the best :). I'm not going to judge, take away, or guilt anyone, for their choice of media they like. Enjoy it (I truly mean that).
For those who continue to follow my blog . I appreciate you SO MUCH! I've been gone from this blog for such a long time cause of school (and I appreciate those who stayed and were excited to see me again). The positive words meant a lot over the years. Everyone have a lovely day. Take care of yourselves.
Sincerely, Kay
ps: I'm open to other media suggestions too so you can drop them in my message box (recent films/ shows, mini/limited series, animation, heck i'm open to comedies and foreign media too).But, analyzing them will most likely be after the shows listed above .Right now I'm focusing on my national exam and my mental health. My first video will probably be in late August or early September. My test is August 20th. Hope everyone is doing well .I'm feeling much better mentally. Hope everyone is feeling the same way :)
for my 1st video I’ll just post it to youtube . But for other videos I may make a early access patreon (like a week before the next video comes out free on youtube). Have to google how all that works (or if there's better alternatives) . Totally fine if you can't afford it (you'll get to see it for free on youtube regardless :D) . I'll be honest . I'm primarily thinking of doing it cause I need to pay off those student loans and I'm trying to hopefully move out of state in a few years. Plus, I love analyzing media anyways (so making it a part time job would be a dream come true .
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I saw a few people asking for advice about how to distract themselves during the election
Here's the problem with that idea: trying to ignore the news just on election day is like showing up at the Olympics without ever having practiced your sport. You won't have any of the skills or habits you need.
Ignore the news every day. There's a big difference between "staying informed" and "stressing yourself out until it's a struggle to just exist, let alone take action." The modern conception of journalism is so far towards the stressing yourself out end of the spectrum -- and if you need to ask, getting your news on social media is even further down that dark, dark hole -- that "ignore all the news every day" is my genuine advice for how to be a good, effective citizen.
You are not obligated to bear witness. Posting is not activism. The extent of my activism is that I have recurring monthly donations to the ACLU and Southern Poverty Law Center and I absolutely claim the moral high ground over someone whose idea of activism is that they read a lot and post a lot.
Here's my advice for how to ignore the news:
Whatever you use to read the news, delete it from your phone. If that's your web browser, so be it -- you can have it back later, when you stop automatically trying to open it whenever you're bored or anxious. If it's your social media app, you can have it back after you curate the right list of people to follow.
Find a hobby, even if it's just binging TV shows or playing video games. If you're like me, you focus best on projects when you have something else to avoid, so now's a great opportunity to finish that novel or birdhouse.
Set boundaries. On the discord I run, there's a channel called interesting-times and it's understood that all the political talk goes in there. On my podcast Topic Lords, I reject political topics. My friends and family basically never talk to me about this stuff any more. That last part may be difficult if your friends are too poor to afford therapy. But the friends who can afford therapy but choose to vent at you instead? Shut those people the fuck down.
If you fuck up one of the above steps and accidentally read something, for god's sake don't post about it and make life harder for everyone else.
I've been living my life like this for several years. What are the consequences of being completely uninformed about what's going on in the world? I have no idea. I still hear plenty about the news, because it's fucking impossible to actually avoid. This is just what it takes to not drown in the news. Keeping my head above water and loving it.
Your training regimen starts today. Good luck.
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PromNont - Ep8
Before I get started I was very hesitant to post this one because it’s not as upbeat as my last & I really struggled with how to say what I wanted. This is just my interpretation and it was written without an ounce of sleep so if I missed anything…
We got two scenes for the pairing this time (I need more PromNont) and imma talk about both…
Starting with the pool scene, Nont is finally home having not received any good news but Prom is there to console him as promised - that man is addicted to a back hug and Nont’s shoulder like nobody’s business. It starts off well but for some reason Prom decides to tell Nont that he too cared for Nant. How aftercare was just aftercare for Nant but the best time for him & how there were times he thought Nant may have cared for him too. This of course is the total opposite of when he said that he has no feelings for Nant, that he was simply protective because of their contract. By the time he gets to talking about it wanting to see the video & theorizing that Nant may still be alive, Nont is clearly uncomfortable with just how far the conversation has shifted.
Even though I’ve spoken about Nant being a ghost between them - it wasn’t until the pool scene that I actually became conscious of the fact that the times Nont reinforced that he isn’t Nant has been an ongoing conversation with Prom since his reveal of being a twin - its typically a response to something Prom has said or done and not just a way to erect a wall.
Prom getting jealous / Prom pushing for aftercare / Prom asking him to stay
From Nonts perspective, Prom doing these things is just him using him as a replacement at best or trying to transition him into being Nant at worst, making the “I’m not Nant '' reinforcement necessary. Ever since their first confrontation where Nont accused Prom of having feelings for his twin and told him not to cross the line with him because he is not Nant, they’ve been dancing around the topic. Now there’s a real possibility that Nant is alive and could come home and the things that weren't allowed to be said are being said, there's no more skirting around it. Believing something, thinking it, is totally different from that person saying and confirming it. It makes it real, makes it more painful.
Nant’s existence feels like it eclipse everything because everything around Nont feels like his twin’s. He had to become his twin, he’s living his choices, he’s surrounded by his friends, he’s engaging with his lovers (some more than others) . His value feels tied to being Nant’s twin. When Prom was silently professing a desire to die at the concept of loss - who was that confession really for? As Nont speaks of classic love triangles he’s overtly speaking on Prom / Nant / Nuth & covertly of his own messy relationship with his missing twin’s lover that resides in that shadow as well.
By the time he gets the reactions of the Baddies he’s done. He’s decided there’s no benefit in finding a brother who doesn’t seem to want to be found, a brother he feels he doesn’t even know anymore.
——
The second scene opens up with Nont seducing Prom - uninhibited, bold, & wanton. Like usual Prom seems adept at reading Nont’s mood, everything about him says trouble before he even utters a word.
And when he does it’s to tell Prom to have sex with him like he’s Nant, how it’s written in the contract. Nont’s ever constant, “I’m not Nant” becomes “I’m Nant.” However it’s not a response to the will of Prom, instead it’s an ultimatum, almost a challenge and maybe on some levels even a punishment. He tells Prom that if he has sex with him like he’s Nant he’ll continue to look for his twin. Even when Prom doesn’t respond at first they both know it’s a yes. In fact there’s no verbalized response from Prom at all, instead he wraps his arms Nont’s neck and goes to pull him in but Nont pulls back, letting Proms hands slide down his body. It’s clear from the start of this scene til the end of it who is the dominant of the moment, who’s the one with the power.
It’s interesting, Nont started off seductively & then tempting - almost coaxing Prom to go along. But he escalates to an intensity rather quickly. A part of me wonders if he secretly wanted to leave his mark on Prom’s memories of Nant…
Somehow Prom has agreed to allow himself to be bound, blind folded and at the mercy of Nont’s hands. I cannot decide if he is silly, desperate, or very trusting. Maybe a bit of all three considering we saw Nont admit to being drunk.
A lot of people heard Nont say, “ Have sex with me like I’m Nant’ but me - I heard him say, “Fuck me like I matter”. Because essentially, I believe that was a big part of it. Yes, there is a bit of anger, bitterness, resentment - which ever word fits best to you - wrapped into this moment but ultimately he wants to feel special, important, cared for. There’s a desire l to lose himself not only in the sex itself but in returning to being the person so many around him seem to yearn for, including Prom, most certainly Prom.
Afterwards they rest with Prom at the head of the bed his feet resting on Nont’s stomach as he lays across the bed. I can’t say if this small bit of physical connection is done consciously or subconsciously. It’s obvious that neither is in a good head space, they’re not in the normal aftercare position Prom seems to favor & when Prom finally ask what Nont’s plans were for finding Nant, Nont responds that Prom must miss Nant badly. Though he may have won the last battle between them, clearly he’s not over it.
This episode seemed to be a step forward for the majority of the pairings, confirmations, confessions, apologies and forgiveness. It was also a shift for Prom & Nont’s…relationship, although I wouldn’t call it a positive one. Like I was getting at in he post, Prom & Nont have a consistent back and forth that typically goes the exact same way every time however this was the first episode we saw either of them deviate & it created a snowball of a mess that leaves neither of them satisfied by the end.
Note: There was a couple of things that surprised me in this episode - for one I was NOT expecting to see PromNant actually have sex nor did I think it was gonna be so similar to PromNont sex. Nant being a switcher was a big surprise - I thought that would be a difference but it seems they get down in the exact same way. Also was a bit lost when Nont said for them to do it as written in the contract because I knew they weren’t using the terms but I assumed they were still engaging in BDSM…unless the contract entails how exactly Nant gets to Dom / Top.
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Another Vocaloid song that I am relating to Transformers - this time, for the Tranformers Earthspark series. Not gonna lie, I haven't 100% watched the show, but of course, my obsession for Starscream had me watching the youtube compilation videos or tiktoks about all the scenes he was on. And this time, centering on the MegaStar side...
( ‵▽′)ψ ~
HURTING FOR A VERY HURTFUL PAIN (EZFG ft. VY2 & VY1)
WARNING: The following post and music video may contain topics about toxic relationships, PTSD, etc.
youtube
So - yeah, the ultimate Toxic yaoi - Megatron and Starscream. I've always been so into their dynamic and how truly dysfunctional-destructive they can be to one another. But something is clear, and thanks to the Earthspark series for bringing up that topic - there has always been a power imbalance with the two of them, being Megatron the last one to truly give the final punches to the seeker and more than that; and for Starscream (both fairly and unfairly) having his trauma and situation invalidated by others.
Like, I saw a video on youtube that analized the whole episode where Starscream gets to interact (and connect) with Hashtag, and I was dead ass when the guy on the video pointed out how Starscream kept seein the Decepticon's mark on Megatron even when it was long gone and replaced by G.H.O.S.T's insigna and that it would always appear whenever Megatron was beating him in the fights.
And you can see Starscream's fear. And you can see his fear in any other variation of his - Starscream's behaviour comes from constant abuse and his taken 'hurt others if you want to survive' ideas.
(LET MY BABYGIRL GO!!) (╯‵□′)╯︵┻━┻
And of course, not only is Starscream the one suffering. Megatron is also suffering - my man over here trying to change after realizing he has been doing things wrong, but things are so complicated and you can see he gets hurt each time he gets called traitor and such.
[ Yadda yadda, Vhaos - we understand this. Now, what about the Vocaloid song? ]
VY2 represents perfectly Megatron's point of view, while VY1 could be Starscream.
"Don't come near, don't come here. Don't let it get you so excited - don't pay it any mind. Just stop shouting your head off. Go away, go away, yes - I'll be gone into thin air soon enough, so feign normalcy, and put up with it." - Starscream's taking his leave - "Nowhere is safe if it's with you."
"Oh, it hurt, the pain's so bad. Why does it hurt so bad as this? Ah, I want to tell you how much it hurts. I want you to be the only one to know. Oh, it's awful, so very awful. Why does it feel so bad as this? I want you, it's you I want. The pain is right here in my chest..." - potential "Megatron realizing he loved Starscream but both had become toxic and he has partaken the abuser's role more than nothing."
And now take the minute 1:50 to the very end of the video - a sparkbreaking where Megatron realizes about everything, but it is overwhelming. And thinking when Starscream leaves that pain in his chest is going to leave - Starscream is free, free from the abuse he has inflicted on him for so long, therefore, he will be free to... then why does it hurt so much? Why hasn't the pain left?
After all, both have been hurting for a very hurtful pain.
Potential angsty fanfictions, yes yes. (๑•̀ㅂ•́)و✧
Leaving the video about Starscream PTSD - good soup.
youtube
(●'◡'●) Ending my rambling here because I feel I've lost my own narrative thread and I am too delulu rn - Vhaos out!
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IWTV RANT
I have really tried to keep my opinions and concerns within safe spaces like discord servers and group chats, but I have honestly had enough of everyone's shit. EVERY SINGLE PERSON. There was an article posted by Polygon yesterday with a list of the most anticipated shows of 2024 and Interview with the Vampire made the list. And I agree, I think season two is highly anticipated, by both huge fans of the lore and books, as well as those who are fans of the show. Now, the problem comes in with what was said about the show and the photo used. I want you to pick out which part people are choosing to focus on (See Below).
Did you figure it out?
It's this small highlighted portion above. That's it. And I understand people are huge fans of Lestat, but that man is a horrible person and is the worst person to ever live, especially in Interview with the Vampire. Period. He's the villain of that book. MY problem is a combination of things in this image: the photo used, the main attraction line, the misspelling of Delainey's last name, and the fact that the lead actor's name is not mentioned ONCE. The storyline of Interview with the Vampire follows Louis de Pointe du Lac and his life before and after being turned by Lestat. In the show, Louis is played by JACOB ANDERSON (See Below).
That's my second problem: His face, nor name, is nowhere to be found. Why is that? Can someone tell me? (I already know the answer). He has been seen plenty of times in the teaser trailer and the short clip that was posted by AMC. We even here his voice in AMC's new video they've posted with all their content for 2024. So why am I looking at a photo of Sam Reid dressed as Lestat? The three main actors (Jacob Anderson, Delainey Hayles, and Assad Zaman) for this season are people of color. We don't see them at all. Why?
Why not use one of these photos?
The next problem is the main attraction line. As stated before, the main character in Interview with the Vampire is Louis. You can argue that Lestat is the protagonist in all of the other books, but that's not the topic at hand. The topic is Interview with the Vampire and it's protagonist is Louis de Pointe du Lac, portrayed by JACOB ANDERSON in the show.
And lastly, how are you publishing something and cannot even correctly spell one of the actor's names? Delainey HAYLES is portraying Claudia in season 2, a character that has a lot of significance throughout the story. And by the looks of it, she may have an even bigger storyline than before. This is her time shine.
So, once again, how do you just go about misspelling her actor's name? And if you forget how to spell it, her Instagram name is Delainey Hayles. And I won't put all the blame on these publications because this is a one-off, but people focused on the wrong thing. But let these delusional "fans" tell it, everybody is making up things to be upset about.
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