#this is why i should wake up at normal times
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Wild how when I call Shipping Culture oppressively pervasive and awful for any Aro/Ace with the gall to enjoy anything on the Internet, I get called a Fun-Hating Killjoy and told to just shut the fuck up or off myself, no matter how mild or polite my comment is. Wild how when I say a character either is textually Aro/Ace or is easier to read as Aro/Ace than Alloromantic/sexual, people start talking down to me like I'm a child who doesn't know anything, saying "Friendly reminder that Aro(s)/Aces can Date/Have Sex too, just like us Normal People!". As if I don't know anything about my own identity. Wild how when I do either of these things or even just say I'm not into a pairing or uninvested in shipping in general people call me fucking homophobic, even if the (at least popularly perceived - let's be honest, people are wrong half the time) genders of the characters is never once made relevant. Even though their reasoning for me being homophobic is lack of investment in a gay pairing they like, and nothing more. Wild how people throw little baby tantrums at even the gentlest criticism of Shipping Culture, or someone choosing not to engage heavily in it. Wild how they have the audacity to ask, with hostility, what the fuck Aro(s)/Aces are talking about when they say Shipping Culture is hostile to Aro/Ace fans, or ask what's wrong with them when they say that they aren't into Shipping.
It's almost like Bigots don't realize they're being Bigots when they do Bigotry, so just saying you're not a Bigot isn't enough. It's almost like Aro/Ace people know what the hell they're talking about. It's almost like we have a fucking point. It's almost like we're valid in expressing contempt and frustration with the constant expectation to engage with Romance and Sexuality at every waking moment, even if we're Romance and/or Sex Favorable. It's almost like we're tired of getting our identities erased, and we're tired of expecting to "act normal", and we're tired of just taking it when Allos use the Favorable members of our communities as a scapegoat for why they should be allowed to totally erase any of our representation just for their "Harmless Queer Fun" - deliberately, and I mean DELIBERATELY, failing to recognize or acknowledge the character's orientation, and how an A-Spec's personal relationship with and expressions of Love are going to look drastically different from an Allo person's - and call us the Bigots when we even glance in the direction of objection.
It's almost like Allo/Amatonormativity are oppressive forces.
Alloromantics/sexuals are constantly looking for any reason they can to call Aro(s)/Aces unloving, unfeeling, frigid, soulless, cruel. Inhuman. They're looking for any reason they can to call us whiny children, stupid, people who "just haven't found the right one", addressing us only as "Works in Progress", or someone who can have their sexuality corrected with the right stimulus - Conversion Therapy and Corrective Rape are okay when it happens to us, after all. Any reason at all to call us heartless monsters. AlloAces are confused children. They can be fixed. AroAllos are manipulative, unfeeling sexual predators. They can't be fixed - just kill them. AroAces are frigid, mean bitches. They can be fixed. God forbid you're Aplatonic. God forbid you're part of the Repulsed spectrum. God forbid you're one of the Loveless. God forbid you hold any pride in your identity, God forbid you don't keep your mouth shut, God forbid you critique the overinflated importance Allos place onto Love as a concept. God forbid you critique something as asinine and juvenile as fucking Shipping Culture. Do any one of these and you've put a bright red, blazing neon target on your back.
Wild how the only real humans amongst us are the Romance, Sex, and Friendship Favorable who put their head down and mask as Allo, and side with the Allos when their fellow A-Specs get too loud for the comfort of their Allo friend's delicate little fee-fees. After all, Vitriol and Harassment are warranted when an Allo's feelings get slightly hurt that an Aro person says, on their own account, to no one in particular, that they're sick of every tag being 80% Shipping Content. Which is a vehemently evil personal attack, clearly.
Wild.
#this whole post is absolutely teeming with venom btw.#if you take personal offense to this then yes this *is* about you actually. now fix it and dont make it any of our problem ever again.#shipping culture#aromantic#asexual#aroace#aphobia#nekro.txt
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a desire that couldn't be stopped.
◟✿ ⠀ ┈─★ ⠀ ೀ ⠀⦂ ⠀〈 ⠀ ━╋ ⠀ . . .ᐟᅟ ⠀ ꒰੭ ⠀ ♱
[takes place months before the prank on hannah]
◟✿ ⠀ ┈─★ ⠀ ೀ ⠀⦂ ⠀〈 ⠀ ━╋ ⠀ . . .ᐟᅟ ⠀ ꒰੭ ⠀ ♱
Warning: minor smut
It was quiet, except for the hums coming from the TV, the colors flickering faintly around the room. The night felt thick, and heavy, like it was cumming into me. I tipped my glass back, the burn of liquor sliding down my throat, warm and bitter, making all the pain in my mind flee.
Hannah and Beth had passed out, I could still hear their low moans as they rested, steady and oblivious. But I couldn't sleep, couldn't rest, There was something restless inside of me, something unsatisfied, eating me up inside out. The shot glass slipped from my fingers, and the echo of it hitting the table was sharper than expected.
That's when I heard a voice, smooth and low
“You're still up?”
I turned, startled, and there was Josh, leaning in the doorway, his eyes catching mine with something more than just curiosity. He wasn't supposed to be here, not tonight, but there he was, leaning against the doorframe, looking at me with that familiar smirk, his gaze lingering a little too long.
“Couldn't sleep,” I muttered, the alcohol making my lungs feel thick, and my pulse a little quicker.
He stepped closer, the dim light casting shadows across his face, making his smirk look more flirtatious than usual. “Maybe, you need something to wear you out?…” he said with a playful tone, “something fun.”
His words hung in the air, and for a second, I couldn't tell if it was the alcohol or the way he looked at me that made my head spin.
I looked down at his hands and saw the bottle, dark, the liquor inside glistening. Without a word, he walked over, his movements slow, he sat right beside me on the couch, so close that I could feel his breath against my mouth. The cushions of the couch dipped under his weight, pulling me slightly towards him, making my heart pound louder than usual.
He twisted the cap off the bottle, taking a long, slow swig, his eyes locked on mine the whole time. Then, with a grin, he handed it to me, his fingers brushing mine. “You said you wanted some hard liquor, right?"
I took the bottle from him, our fingers grazing each other for just a second, but the warmth from his hand lingered on mine. Without a word, I lifted the bottle to my lips, the burn stronger this time, hotter. I wiped my mouth with the back of my hand, feeling the alcohol stir something bold inside me.
"Holy shit, that's strong," | muttered, my voice cracking slightly.
Josh laughed, leaning in closer, his voice dropping low. "You should've seen your face," he teased, his breath warm against my ear. "It was sexy."
The heat between us was growing, thickening the air. I froze as I heard Hannah shift on the couch, a sleepy moan escaping her lips, but she didn't wake. My heart pounded in my chest, a rush of uncertainty flooding me, but before I could pull away, Josh's voice cut through the tension.
“Why don't we head up to my room…. So we don't wake her..” he whispered, his voice low and seductive.
I turned up to look at him, catching the glint in his eyes, a drunken haze hiding whatever restraint was left of him. He was so close, his breath warm against my neck. Maybe I should have pushed him away and told him this wasn't right. But instead, I felt a rush of heat, tempting me further.
“Oh? You want some, huh?” I teased back, my voice filled with desire and flirtiness. The liquor may have made me a little too confident.
He chuckled softly, leaning back just enough to meet my eyes, his gaze dark and teasing. “Fuck yeah” his hand grabbed my thigh and squeezed it, it made me flush up. Sending heat through my body… I could feel myself getting wet already.
“You coming? Or what..” he chuckled, touching my thigh.
I hesitated a bit before nodding, the alcohol blurring my thoughts, making me do things I wouldn't normally do. Josh grinned, standing up and holding his hand out to me. I glanced over at Hannah one last time, she was still asleep, I genuinely hoped she couldn't hear in her sleep.
I slipped my hand into him and he led me down the halls, the house was quiet except for the sound of our footsteps. Everything felt surreal, it was as if I was floating in the air, watching myself. When we reached his room, he pushed the door open, the light casting shadows along the bed.
As soon as the door was locked behind us, he turned to me, his face looking hungry and impatient. He then leaned over me, his lips crashing into mine, and his hands were rough, pulling me closer to him, I could taste the alcohol in his mouth. I wasn't resisting it, I kissed him back, my pulse pounding in my head, drowning out every thought.
His hands gripped my waist, fingers curling into the fabric of my clothes, desperate to rip them off. With a rough push, he guided me backward. I felt the mattress hit the back of my legs before he settled on top of me, pressing me down onto the mattress. The room around us faded, a blur of shadows and silence. All I could focus on was him, his small groans, his heavy breath, and the heat of his touch.
He moved impatiently, stripping me down, each layer was keeping him from taking me. His fingers brushed over my skin, stopping to flick across my nipple, sending a jolt of pleasure to my body.
Hovering over me, his breath heavy, uneven gasps, the alcohol guiding his movements. My mind spun, trying to catch up with him. But, my body responded before I could think tensing under his touch, moans slipping out against my will as he teased my nip.
“Fuck, Sammy, you’re so pretty when you whine,” he murmured, his voice low and dripping with lust.
His mouth lowered to my breast, his tongue flicking my nipple, it was slow at first, and I started to let out heavier moans, I bit my lip, trying to keep quiet, the thought of Hannah still asleep in the living room was keeping me from giving into him.
But Josh wasn't finished, he made quick sucks on the tip of my nip. Teasing me with the soft stroke of his tongue, waiting for me to break, to beg him for more, to give him just what he wanted. Every time he put his mouth against me, it was like a challenge, pushing me closer to the edge.
“Oh God, Josh, please…” I gasped, the words slipping out.
I looked down at him, my breath shaky, eyes pleading as I whined. The teasing had become unbearable, each flick of his tongue leading to a deeper desire. I was tired of the game, and the way he toyed with my body, keeping me on edge.
His eyes flicked up to meet mine, hungry and lustful. He knew what he was doing, how he was pushing me to the edge, only to pull back, dragging out the moment. He dug his fingers into my skin rough and possessively. Holding me in place as if I belonged to him.
I arched my back, desperate for his touch, my body losing any control I had left in my body. My breath was heavy and ragged, the tension tightened, like a string inside me, ready to snap.
“Please….” I whispered again, my voice raw and shaking with desire.
Josh had a wicked grin on his face, his mouth tracing the curve of my boob, but still, he wouldn’t give in to my pleas. His tongue flicked over my nipple again, lazily, taunting me, wanting me to break. His rough hands were all over my body, reaching into my sweatpants. It felt like I had no control like my body was his.
Soft moans escaped my lips as his fingers traced the thin fabric of my panties, pressing his fingers just enough for it to give me a sense of pleasure. My hips arched into his hand, desperate for more than just teasing.
His breath was hot against my neck, a low chuckle coming out, “Is this what you want? Huh?” His voice was rough, almost like a growl, thick with lust. He was playing with me, dragging the moment out, trying to make me break.
I whimpered in response, my body controlling itself, wanting, needing, more of him that I was not going to admit.
He hooked his fingers to the waistband of my sweatpants, pulling them down slowly, letting himself savor the moment, the bulge in his pants growing, looking into my eyes as I squirmed underneath him. “Say it,” he murmured, his breath hot against my ear, his voice demanding. “Tell me you want me to fuck you.”
I bit my lip, hesitating, the words tangling up in my throat, but my body was telling him all he needed to know. He arched my back further, his hand steady as he slipped my sweatpants down my legs, letting them pull at my ankles. The cool air hit my bare skin, but the heat between us was all I could feel.
“Come on,” he taunted, his eyes glaring down at me, his hand tracing the outline of my panties, this time, more rough, more insistent. “You know you want it, say it.”
I let out a shaky breath, my voice barely above a whisper. “I….I need you, Josh…”
He let out a grin, his fingers pressing harder against me, making me gasp. “That's more like it…” he groaned low in my ear, his breath hot and heavy. “I'll give you exactly what you need…”
He hooked his fingers to the side of my panties, pulling them aside, his touch was rough, yet pleasant. He dipped a finger into my cunt, the sensation sending a shock through my body. My back was arched, a deep moan coming out of my lips. Every nerve lighting up under his touch.
“Oh Josh…Josh!” I cried out, my voice thick, not able to hold myself back.
His lips shuttered as he looked at me, his eyes locked on mine as he thrust his fingers into me. “Yeah, that's it…” he murmured, pushing deeper inside me, his fingers curling just enough to hit my sensitive spot, which made my hips buck onto his hand. “I knew you'd like it…”
I couldn't even form words, my breath coming out in short, desperate gasps. My body was no longer in my control, I was his, all his. Every thrust sent jolts of pleasure in me, making me whine quietly. My legs were trembling as I tried to keep composure.
His other hand slid up my body, gripping my waist, possesively, claiming me. He presses his body closer, his lips brushing against my neck, sucking softly, leaving a trail of hickeys. “You are so fucking hot like this …” he groaned, his voice rough. “Moaning my name…”
His words made my heart beat faster, my body arched further, desperate for more. He slipped another finger inside, making my insides stretch. Gasping, my head tilted back in pleasure, it was overwhelming. The heat was suffocating, pushing me closer to spilling all over his fingers.
I was trembling, unable to hold back my orgasm, my fingers trembling against the sheets, gripping them tightly as he continued thrusting his fingers inside me, I wanted more, so much more.
“Please, give me more, Josh…” I begged my voice raw, and breathy.
He started fumbling around with his belt, his hands shaky and impatient. The clink of his buckle cut through the silence. His breath was ragged, his chest rising and falling as he pulled his pants down. Revealing his hard-erected cock. His face was flushed a shade of deep red. The alcohol and lust mixed in his eyes, having a haze of desire.
I bit my lip as I watched him, my heart beating in my chest. The heat was unbearable. My eyes traced the lines of his body, the way his muscles tensed, his jaw clenching as he looked down at me with hunger, was turning me on.
He kicked off his pants, and with the sound of fabric hitting the floor, I felt the air around me grow thicker. His eyes locked into mine, there was something possessive with the way he looked at me as if he was struggling to hold back like he was about to devour me, but he wanted to savor this moment.
“You’re so fucking beautiful…” his voice was low, filled with wanting, it sent shivers down my spine. He leaned over, brushing a strand of hair out of my face, his gaze never leaving mine. There was a gentleness to his touch as if it belonged to a different moment, but it was here when they were about to have sex.
He drew my hips up closer to his cock, his hands settled on my hips, grounding me to the bed. He started thrusting slowly at first, careful as if he was savoring the moment. A groan escaped his lips as he thrust into me, his breath catching. His face closed, his eyes rolling up as he felt me around him.
He started to thrust faster, his hands guiding me to my climax. My heart raced, I'd never had sex before… but he didn't know that. Our breaths were on each other. There was the scent of sex in the air, it was seductive, lust-inducing. My body twitched a little as I felt him pull out and have an orgasm all over my lower stomach.
“Fuck, I'm sorry,” Josh murmured, his voice barely a whisper as he wrapped his arms around me, pulling me gently around his chest. His hand traced circles around my back as we lay together, and his breath steadied against my hair. I could feel his heartbeat, heavy and close as if he was struggling to find the right words.
“Josh…this was my first time..” I whimpered softly, my voice catching.
He stilled, and I felt him tense behind me.
“What?..” his voice cracked, laced with shock, there was something else in his eyes, like embarrassment or regret. His eyes shifted towards me, his eyes searching mine. “You should have told me… I would have gone slower…” he whispered, his hand brushing my cheek as he looked at me.
For a moment his gaze held onto me. He leaned in softly kissing my mouth, he covered our bare bodies with the blanket. Holding him close as he rubbed circles on my back. “Rest, I'll move you to Hannah’s bed in the morning…” his voice trailed off as he drifted off to sleep, his love enveloping me.
#until dawn#josh washington#sam giddings#josh x sam#jossam#sam x josh#until dawn remake#until dawn spoilers#sam#until dawn remaster
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ZYZ + ZYC = 20. Kiss on a scar ♥️
Amazing choice, thank you! This one went a little maudling...
I'm still taking prompts! You can find the full list here, or feel free to make up a fun addition to the list~
Zhao Yuanzhou forgets at times how easily humans scar. How they carry the visual, visceral evidence of their defeats or their victories on their bodies for the entirety of their short lifespans. He shudders at the thought: if one had to wear one's scars for life, at his age he might be covered in scars. It's probably for the best he can heal himself as well as he can.
Next to him on the bed Zhou Yichen sleeps on, unaware he is being watched so carefully. He claims he sleeps better when someone is with him, and to his credit Zhao Yuanzhou hasn't seen him have any nightmares on any of the nights they spent together. If he makes sure to thoroughly exhaust Zhou Yichen before he falls asleep, well, one does what one must to help a friend avoid nightmares.
The sweat they worked up together has since dried on Yichen's skin, but the smell of them still lingers in the room. These quiet moments feel like a luxury, and he would wake Yichen to share the moment, but waking him would break the moment too, and Yichen would not appreciate being woken for anything other than an emergency.
So Zhao Yuanzhou luxuriates in the peace alone, remembering the scars that cross Yichen's shoulders, the one round arrow scar next to his navel, the barely-visible scars on his hands. To say Zhou Yichen isn't self conscious about them would be a lie, but he forgets to hide himself between moans and sighs as they spend an evening in each other's company. It is only afterwards that he remembers, and they both pretend Zhao Yuanzhou hasn't long seen the past Yichen carries with him on his skin, like he didn't kiss the same expanse of flesh moments or hours ago.
Zhou Yichen rolls onto his side, his back now to Zhao Yuanzhou. Normally Zhao Yuanzhou would take this opportunity to lie down beside him, to pull him close, and fit them together in a way that will help him trap Yichen in bed come morning. Tonight, instead, he sits up, leaning on one hand as he reaches out and slides Yichen's shirt off his shoulder.
Lean muscles shrug in response to the cold, but Zhou Yichen doesn't wake. Instead he curls in on himself, pushing his back closer to Zhao Yuanzhou's warmth. In the moonlight the visible scars gleam like pearls, like treasures instead of imperfections.
Zhao Yuanzhou can't help himself– and why should he? He is a demon, after all. He leans in close, running a hand under Yichen's arm and to his chest to hold him in place (to hold him close), and presses a soft trail of kisses along one ridged scar, and down another. Zhou Yichen stirs, but wakes only slowly. Still languid from their earlier efforts, he only moves far enough to open one eye and stare balefully but sleepily and Zhao Yuanzhou.
"What are you doing, you ridiculous demon?"
"Hmm, I'm having my wicked way with you, can't you tell, Xiao Zhuo-daren?" Zhao Yuanzhou teases, lips barely releasing the marked skin under them to form the words.
"Why do you like them so much?" Yichen doesn't even respond to the teasing. It's no fun, except for the fact that Zhao Yuanzhou vividly remembers how he caused his current exhaustion. He finally relents his kisses, and settles down with his chest to Yichen's back, head propped up on one arm to lean over him- to be able to kiss him properly.
"I find it fascinating, the way you humans carry your past with you."
Judging by his frown, Yichen is not moved by his kiss. "And must you enact this fascination in the middle of the night?"
"Would you prefer I do it during the day instead?" He replies in mock-surprise. They both know the answer to that, and Yichen pulls him into a rough kiss just to shut him up.
"No. Now sleep, you great ape."
#fangs of fortune#story of mystics#大梦归离#zhao yuanzhou#zhou yichen#FoF#Jin writes fic#“”“friend”“” he says- in the same breath as admitting they slept together#normal demon behaviour I'm sure
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Lucifer had to put two blankets over Adam to cover him properly. He tucked him in and looked over his face.
He tucked a few strands of hair behind his ear. He's gorgeous. Lucifer always thought so, but he was a tad preoccupied to really acknowledge it.
Lucifer smiled and walked out of the room. It'll be time to feed Charlie soon. Hopefully, they won't wake Adam.
Surprisingly, Lucifer had to wake Charlie. The poor thing was exhausted.
He gave her a fed and a nappy change and put her back down. She was out to it in record time.
The next morning, Lucifer found Adam already downstairs.
Lucifer: Morning- are you wearing the same clothes as yesterday?
Adam: Uh- I don't have any clothes here. Their all at the castle.
Lucifer: ...Hm. I guess I should go shopping, try and find something that will fit you.
Adam: You don't have to, this is fine.
Lucifer: Adam, if you wear the same thing over and over, it'll break down. You need new clothes... I could talk to Michael. He knows how to deal with people like you.
Adam sat down on the couch, watching Lucifer as he walked over to him.
Adam: People like me?
Lucifer: Well- like... monsters? I don't- specifically mean you- I just... you're not entirely human. This isn't sounding good, huh?
Adam: I mean... slightly offensive, but you're not wrong. I haven't been human since I was six. So... I don't know. Fuck.
Lucifer: I didn't mean to offend you.
Lucifer sat next to Adam and put his hand on his knee. Why was he touching him? Lucifer didn't know- he wanted to. Really badly.
Adam: You didn't- it's fine. I get it. It's just... weird bring somewhere where I'm the freak... the villagers were the freaks. Small and weak. We were like God's to them... but I guess that's what happened when you're in some weird, fucked up cult.
Lucifer: Maybe we could remove your parasite- then you'll be normal-!
Adam: It got injected into my spine, so I have a feeling removing it wouldn't end well for me.
Adam patted Lucifers hand before resting his hand on top of Lucifer's. He laughed at their size difference.
Adam: Thanks for helping, though. It means a lot. For the longest time, I didn't even realize something was wrong with me. Or my family. You've opened my eyes to a lot of shit. So, you've already done more foe me than anyone else has.
Lucifer: Well... you're worth it.
Adam blushed and looked away. Great, now he was being sweet to him. Adam didn't know if he could handle sweet.
But maybe it wouldn't be so bad.
Have you seen Resident Evil: Village? All I'm saying is Adam and Emily as two of the three sisters and Sera as Lady Dimitrescu.
Lucifer is Ethan trying to find Charlie.
At first, Adam was on his mother and sisters side- but because they have a weird thing against dudes, he eventually helps Lucifer.
Trust me, it feels illegal not to make Adam the stunning Lady Dimitrescu, but for story reasons, he'll be one of her kids.
I mean, their hot. What can I say? Adam would look great like this 🤷
Adam: Mmm- man flesh~.
Lucifer: ...Kinda gay, man.
Adam: It's not gay.
Lucifer: It is- man flesh? Really?
Adam: ...
Lucifer: ...
Adam: *stabs sickle into his leg and drags him away* Mother!
I have seen it! Ha I love this. ((Yes he'd rock being the Lady of the house 😩))
Lucifer: Ow!! What the fuck!?
Adam: It's not gay! Mother was right.
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Steven Beschloss at America, America:
In the last few days, I have received a number of messages from readers who told me they are disengaging. “I am retiring from politics,” one said. “I’m avoiding the news,” said another. And this: “I’m too old for another Trump term and do not want to even see anything political for a long time. Steven, I’ve enjoyed your content, but in order to live to 78 [I’m] going cold turkey on politics.”
I get it. Trump’s emphatic win and Harris’ loss is heartbreaking, especially after all the effort so many of us have made to achieve a different outcome. This defeat is made harder by the awareness of the dark and disturbing days to come with Donald Trump back in the White House. There are many high-profile critics who are wondering about their safety now in a world where Trump fanatics like Steve Bannon echo his leader’s fervor for retribution by promising “rough justice.” It would be a mistake to assume that Trump wasn’t serious with all his violent, vengeance-inciting verbiage. Anyone who assumes the next Attorney General will act with the reluctance and politeness of Merrick Garland toward the ex-president—resulting in his not being held account for inciting a deadly insurrection on Jan. 6—is sorely underestimating Donald Trump’s endless capacity for cruelty, attraction to carnage and hunger to punish anyone who crosses him. But it would be a misfortune if many of us meet the coming months only with fear and reluctance, disengaging from the necessary opposition to Trump’s authoritarian enterprise. That’s what Trump hopes to achieve with his angry, aggressive intimidation.
It’s appalling to see how the billionaires have quickly fallen in line. This arrived yesterday from Washington Post and Amazon owner Jeff Bezos, who spinelessly deep-sixed his newspaper’s endorsement of Kamala Harris: “Big congratulations to our 45th and now 47th President on an extraordinary political comeback and decisive victory,” he posted on what was Twitter. “No nation has bigger opportunities. Wishing Donald Trump all success in leading and uniting the America we all love.” In a normal world, of course, that would read like a warm and magnanimous gesture, not a kowtowing plea from a self-interested businessman who fears the consequences of crossing Trump. And he was not alone.
Meta/Facebook owner Mark Zuckerburg, who’s been threatened with prison by Trump, posted this on his social media site, Threads: “Congratulations to President Trump on a decisive victory. We have great opportunities ahead of us as a country. Looking forward to working with you and your administration.” So again: I get it if you’re feeling utterly discouraged and doubtful if you should stay involved. If the billionaires are rolling over, why should anyone take any risks? That’s understandable, especially in the wake of this awful defeat, and a reason why some of us will choose to disconnect. But I urge you to take to heart the closing words of President Joe Biden yesterday in graciously accepting the election’s outcome: “Setbacks are unavoidable, but giving up is unforgivable…We are going to be OK, but we need to stay engaged.” I also urge you to listen to every word of Kamala Harris’ concession speech Wednesday from Howard University (you can watch it here). I was particularly interested in her guidance as we look forward.
“While I concede this election,” she said, “I do not concede the fight that fueled this campaign—the fight for freedom, for opportunity, for fairness and the dignity of all people. A fight for the ideals at the heart of our nation, the ideals that reflect America at our best. That is a fight I will never give up.” She also talked about not giving up the fight for reproductive freedom, for protecting our schools and streets from gun violence, and for democracy, the rule of law and equal justice. “And we will continue to wage this fight in the voting booth, in the courts and in the public square. And we will also wage it in quieter ways: in how we live our lives by treating one another with kindness and respect, by looking in the face of a stranger and seeing a neighbor, by always using our strength to lift people up, to fight for the dignity that all people deserve.” We will need to hear more thoughts like this as Trump and his enablers drag us through their world of hostility and degradation. The vice president made a particular plea to young people, including students in the audience from Howard, a historically Black university: “To the young people who are watching, it is OK to feel sad and disappointed. But please know it's going to be OK…Don’t ever give up. Don’t ever stop trying to make the world a better place…the fight for our country is always worth it.”
[...] I will not give up the effort to pursue a better, more just, more equal, more democratic, more decent and kind America. It will take plenty of energy and effort to keep clear about what is true and what is false, what is right and wrong, what is normal and what is insane—and to inform myself and you about what’s happening and what we might do about it.
The temptation is there to disengage., but it’s the definitive time to stay in the fight.
#America America#Steven Beschloss#Substack#2024 Presidential Election#2024 Elections#Kamala Harris#Donald Trump#Joe Biden
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I'm using a blow dry brush and it's actually working!?!??!!?!?!?!?
#IM SO HAPPYYYYYYYYY#FUCK I NEED TO SLEEP I DIDNT NOTICE THE TIME#its ok if i ont sleep this on ce right#oh fuck my poor neighbours i forgot tht my hairdryer is loud....#this is why i should wake up at normal times#well whatever i didnt like them anyway theyre super fucking loud too#and its ok to sacrifice oke nifhts sleep for myhair#it wont result in a all out insomnia thingy again fs i think#aaaaa im so happyyyyyy#WAITTT THE HUMIDITY IS HIGH MY HAIR WILL DIE TMRW :((((
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sorry for only saying this type of shit lately but i kinda wanna drive a car straight into a brick wall at the highest speed possible
#trying to keep it together so bad because i already know the problems and solutions and whatnot but i cannot do anything#i desperately just need to do something. accomplish any task. actually several would be nice. but i cannot stand just letting life go by#while i watch other people have the things i want. or even metaphorically living my dream like. that should be me why am i settling for thi#i hate even talking about this because i feel so stupid when i know it's not even a real tangible problem and that i actually DO have real#problems to tackle and the ability to do so but i'm choosing to be upset over the stupidest things i could possibly be sad about#and i can't even be sad about it in a normal way i'm cycling through like several different reactions to smth that isn't even real#or if it is real i literally do not have tanglible evidence for it one way or another like i'm driving myself insane for no reason#i can't even get catharsis because all i'm doing is digging a deeper hole for something i never should've gone back into in the first place#because i KNOW how i am i KNOW how i react to things and i still chose to do it lmao.#and i continue to choose to go through this shit instead of actively trying to change my life because... i'm lazy? and stupid? idk#negative self-talk isn't gonna get me to do anything either so let's just say i'm feeling particularly unmotivated like usual#i hated being a teenager but i really do miss when all my problems just amounted to 'someone was mean to me on tumblr today :(' or i failed#a test in chemistry or something. like i yearn for that simplicity becasue at this point all i'm doing is ruining my own life LMAO#i'm too scared to live i'm too scared to die so i just sit here and fantasize that life could be amazing if i wait#and i'll magically get everything i've ever wanted if i just wait long enough. and i know it isn't true and i still wait for it to happen.#because honestly like. i think deep down i am just convinced i will fail at anything i do when that shouldn't be what scares me.#what scares me should be never even allowing myself to fail because i never tried to do anything at all with myself or my life#like. wake the fuck up. get off your ass and put in the effort. learn some skills. gain independence and stability and discipline and do it#just live please i'm begging you just live so i can be happy don't i deserve to be happy... why am i not letting myself be happy#i'm literally keeping myself trapped in this negative feedback loop ON PURPOSE because teehee shiny toy#and it doesn't matter if the love is real it doesn't matter how i feel like i'm just using it as a distraction i can't say it's motivation#because it's barely motivated me at all. i have to start being realistic. 25 & just realizing you actually have to participate in your life#anyways. i've cried i've agonized i've pictured killing myself in 30 different ways. i think the only way i'm gonna feel better is#to just actually try this time without giving up. wish me luck
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and thus begins the season of 100+ degree heat every single day...
#i will be digging a hole and crawling into it thanks. i will Cover myself with dirt and not come out#the sun is almost completely down and its still over a hundred out. sigh#~its the most wonderful time of the year~#im placing personal bets whether or not itll hit 120 (im strongly betting Yes)#maybe i should go live in antarctica#vibe with penguins. get killed by a leopard seal. you know how it is#instead my options are: the dirt / walk off into the desert and perish#i wake up every morning miserable and sweaty <3 this is so fun <3#so jealous of the puppets rn. they dont have to deal with this#put me on a temperature regulated set bois#my laptop: heat warning in effect#YEAH NO SHIT. HONEY.#gonna need to start using my ceiling fan soon just to get some fuckin Sleep#the ac is not enough during the day#absolutely unprompted#i was wondering 'oh why am i more irritated than normal why am i more fatigued than normal'#OH YEAH. BECAUSE ITS MISERABLE OUT.#melting into a puddle of bog... goo... that's just water. hm.#turning into an actual physical bog#sphagnum and tannins and everything#i wake up. i drag myself out of bed. i sit at my desk and dissolve. rinse and repeat#this has been my routine for Days now <3#i hope yall are having a cooler more tolerable summer!#but given the absolute state of this planet uh! i doubt it! still! i have hope! keep cool guys
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🍷
#im in such a bad and low mood :<#it's not just my period hormones 🥴#my wireless headphones worked fine all of yesterday and today when i wake up they're blinking#they're liked fucked up... i turn them off but they constantly turn themselves back on. when i connect them to my ipad they constantly#keep disconnecting and shutting off and turning on 🙃 it makes me so angry bc i need to wear them basically all the time#bc all the noise from neighbors and my family and outside is driving me crazy#but they just dont work anymore?? plus i cant afford new ones... esp now which brings me to my next point#bc of my mom having troubles w school and loans and work etc she was like yeah u guys might have to pay for me this summer so we'll be#proper poor 😄 she doesnt WANT that either but it just sucks bc i got $300 every month and i can barely afford anything as is#yeah so there is no chance of me buying new headphones until at least august or september ......#then im annoyed bc my sisters are passive aggressive 24/7 and hate my existence and my mom is depressed lol#and i have no one to talk to or be with. it's summer and i wanna do stuff but i just dont wanna do it alone lmao#and then im just sad bc of many things.....#also i hate myself bc im a loser failure piece of shit but like yeah that's normal for me to feel#i just hate everything and it's so hard to endure this lame ass existence skskskskks#why cant ANYTHING be good ever in my life??#i am garbage and im surrounded by bad things lmao... anyways can i just stop breathing now pls#and it's not just a 'tiny' thing like my headphones not working like it might seem to others#but when u live a life where NOTHING is good or NOTHING works everything just piles on#ppl dont seem to understand that normally bc most ppl have some good things in their lives#so they just cannot comprehend what it's like when nothing works on any level in your life lok#ofc im depressed ofc im angry and bitter and dejected. i have no good things or moments at all in my life. that tears u down#i mean ofc i could be living in an active warzone and that'd be .. pretty awful i can imagine. but yeah... my situation is still not ideal#like i mean i do actually try to practice gratitude of having a roof over my head my own room water in the pipes and food so i dont starve#i am thankful for that bc many ppl dont even have that#i still feel depressed tho <3#idk what im talking abt now i just feel SO bad and i have no one to talk to#i have nothing to do... no help no treatment... everyone hates me and wants me dead......#why should i fight when no one cares abt me anyway... well.. i mean i do wanna experience more nature but like idk#im just so exhausted... why cant i ever have smth good in my life that also dont go away after a short while lol
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I think I'm going insane. Lately my dreams have been so mundane, it wouldn't be weird if I wasn't just a person that has nightmares 80% of the time, so I now my dreams are so hard to distinguish from reality.
I wouldn't be able tell what was real from what not if it wasn't because last night I went to my doctor's appointment and I was handed new glasses by Harvey just to go back home and find out Laois was cooking something in my backyard.
#to be fair. in my dream i was back at my old house. so the horrors where there still#also i've been dreaming about my dog. but sometimes it's not him. it's other dog trying to replace him. but it's not him. i miss him dearly#but it's... weird. i never actually dream with characters either. something strange is going on#I've been telling my brother i wake up and i have to remember who i am#for the totally normal dreams. it's like my soul is divided and it's living somewhere else for the night#who is the person i am when i dream. because it's not me. it's a whole different live. whole different people around me. I'm going insane#there's such a strange feeling about it. it's familiar? it's comfortable?#which only makes it even more weird. why is a life so different to mine feel so comfortable...#to the point i wake up and i don't remember who i am for at least ten minutes#but then i forget what i had dreamt about. and then i go around my day randomly reminding things. then that's when i realize those memories#were actual dreams#i should write a fanfic about this lmao#it was a nice dream though. i remember vividly i was sitting in one of those chairs thingies that hang in the air?#and i was swinging happily. i think Laios was talking about where he got whatever the fuck he was cooking. i couldn't understand him really.#he wasn't speaking in spanish but it wasn't english either. i think it was a made up gibberish... I'm still baffled by how comfortable i was#i think there were friends around too. maybe a hangout was going on? everything was nice. it reminds me of the times#i would go eat at a friend's house. but things felt a lot nicer. it was like if time had stopped and nothing wrong could ever happen.#and even then. i was still there. which i think that's why i started to feel dizzy in my little swing. i ended up waking up from that.#i still get dizzy remembering it.#welp. I hope i don't lose myself tonight...#I don't actually know what's worse. the nightmares are common. they are familiar. there's comfort in knowing what to expect.#but “good” dreams like that... i end up thinking about them too much. the residual feeling is weirder#and i have to deal with the whole different layer that is.. there's was a fucking anime guy there. kill me. kill me. get him OUT of my brain#I'm not lying when I say I can physically feel Laios rearranging my brain in ways i will not share publicly#kill me.
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HIMETCHI i have her in my pix rn. she likes cereal and gummies
#art#traditional art#watercolour#fanart#tamagotchi pix#tamagotchi pix party#himetchi#and probably more things. but thats all ive figured out she likes so far LOL#also sorry for how badly i wrote cere. actually no. you will look at my dysgraphic writing im not gonna apologize for it#im embracing it. the other day i was thinking about how like people will put a bit of paper or tape or post-it note over a mistake in their#analogue drawings and then redraw the part. and i was thinking like maybe i should do that to why dont i. and then i realized i didnt wanna#and remembered how my dysgraphia seeps into everything i do with my hands ever at all times. no longer feeling bad about it#im leaning into it HHJKLDSHD u will look at my attempt at writing the word cereal and u will like it <3#anyway yeah ive gotten really into tamagotchis. ive been using them to help get myself up at a normal time too#i must wake up. so i can. feed my girl or else she will be UPSET AT ME
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got my sleep study results. no diagnosis yet, got a second sleep study and an MSLT scheduled for july. the only thing i'm interested in right now is that the sleep study found i fall asleep within 3 minutes on average????? like holy shit that is SO fast. i never could relate to people saying they count sheep or imagine an empty white room to induce sleep, but i thought i simply fell asleep easily, not that it was basically instantly compared to normal people. threeeeee minute average. dude i close my eyes and i'm checking OUTTTT of consciousness. my eyes shut and i'm unconscious faster than a twister heading for an elementary school. omg. i guess i never realized because it's not like i lie awake WAITING to fall asleep. i start dreaming within a few seconds of closing my eyes but before i'm asleep so i get absolutely zero time to sit there and think "yep i'm still awake huh" lol
#my REM sleep is also “very light” which explains why i've been SUCHHH a light sleeper my entire life#bruh when i was growing up someone could open a door on the other side of the house and it'd wake me up 😭#someone could be walking normally in the kitchen or start a shower and my stupid ass body would wake up because of it#i've always had a weird amount of guilt/shame and maybe feeling like a faker about telling people i live with to PLEASE be quieter at night#cuz it's not MY fault i sleep so lightly yet i always felt as if it was. now i got a sleep study to prove that i'm not making it up#now if i get a narcolepsy diagnosis in a few months the first thing i'm doing is calling my brother and saying#“all those times you took a shower when i was asleep you were tormenting me because of my disability :///” lmao#since i got health insurance last year i've been diagnosed with other genetic diseases that i should prob warn him about anyways... yikes#doesn't seem like he has any of them but if i have them then he is for sure carrying the genes and i know he wants kids...#bluh
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saw a really fun show tonight! got home took pee and became an ex-member of the never passed out club
#it's oversharing time on tumblr bc I'm a little freaked and have never fainted before haha#we got home and I just suddenly got a lot of pelvic discomfort and nausea like food poisoning#at some point I was thinking oh better go tell my mum in case she needs the bathroom/wondering why I've been up there a while#hey listen don't come upstairs I'm gonna poop massively#and apparently I did actually do that. but I don't remember because the next thing I saw was her looking over me on the floor downstairs#so I still feel like I dreamt that conversation and also the first few things said to me waking up#which is probably normal for passing out right.#really surreal and not a fun thing to happen. fortunately only happened for a few seconds but felt like I was out longer#I'm sure experienced faintees are looking at this as no big deal but it kinda shook me ngl#I'm better so I think I'm just dehydrated (I do drink through the day. maybe it's still not enough as it should be tho?)#but apparently I went grey and blue lipped which is just scary for everyone! I'm ok now#I'm just lying here searching my symptoms and going hm. fascinsting like a cartoon scientist in-between being dramatic and scared#I never did poop
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still reading the same webnovel, so far trying to be a better person has only earned ariadne the murder of her little sister and of literally the only adult that has ever shown her kindness in her entire life so i think she should start killing people now
#i talk a lot <3#genuinely cried when ariadne came home only to find arabella had died while she was out bringing her a present#like what the fuck dude#arabella was gonna call her unnie when she came back ariadne was going to sent her somewhere safe where she could do what she liked#she had to wake up she needed to wake up ariadne was home she needed to practice her music so she could go to school and be happy and-#i'm very normal about this#i mean she did end up managing to get her stepmother killed later on but like. she should be more proactive about it.#because i'm starting to see a pattern and i don't like where this is going#as it is ariadne is running out of people she cares about and it's only a matter of time until alfonso also gets murdered#i'm the queen in this life#<- why are the titles always so long btw what's up with that
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*smacking myself in the face* SHUT UP BRAIN SHUT UP
#like girl this is NOT something I need to spend every waking minute stressing out and making myself miserable about#and YET#LITERALLY LOOSEN UP I WANNA BE ABLE TO BREATHE AGAIN#Lu rambles#literally nothing has happened I went out with the theatre boy ONE time and we chatted and it was fine. I said some stuff#that in retrospect was probably super awkward but like that's life. like it was just a chill hang out except for that#I HATE social situations. theatre is one thing bc it's With A Purpose but just sitting and talking to someone#is REALLY REALLY HARD. I feel small and terrified like a frightened animal.#but it was fine! it was literally fine!!! at the end we were both like ''we should hang out again sometime'' even though#neither of us is sure if we want like... a Relationship(TM). we're just hanging out bc we get along well. it's Normal#so WHYYYYYY can I not just feel any peace or confidence anymore why did I do this to myself#I wish I'd never said anything to him in the first place. like it was chill and easy to just be friends but now?? UGH#I literally do not care enough to be THIS freaked out about it and I know that logically and yet my brain won't stop panicking constantly#I just want to RELAX 😭#shrimp emotions
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Guys I dont think 7 hours of sleep is actually the right amount for me.
#this is the first day in maybe a month or 2 i didnt set an alarm for myself to wake up at a reasonable time#and i slept extremely peacefully from 11 to 11 thats 12 hours of sleep i also feel good??? like not exhausted from oversleep???#i do work 6 days a week... but like that could be worse i could not have a day off at all and i need the money#and i refuse to go to bed early theres already so little time in the day i cant waste it on sleep ughhg#crossing my fingers that my new job works out but thats also gonna mess with my sleep bad for a good while#body why are u so needy!!! 10 hours of sleep is unreasonable!!! i get it that 5-6 is too little#but 7-8 should be normal we should be fine what is up girl!!?
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