#this is what my house looks like tbh
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^ i care about this scribble deeply . He he ehehe hehe
#bloodborne#decadentart#man idk what to even tag this as beyond just Bloodborne. just a bunch of yharnamites & the good hunter#I love you people of yharnam. Very dear to me#kind of an exploration of Ideas . Not reallt anything comprehensive . thats how u should do it tbh#if im drawing shit every day. its gonna get messy. Orkay#drivel as in nonsense#but also? drool. Hrmg#yes i gave that man a tail. and?#i#i should draw some yharnamites again sometime genuinely fun drawing unwashed hairy lads idk#u kinda havw to get me#also yeah the weird lips are intentional#its like the lips on dogs and wolves#look ive been listrning to the voice files of the yharnamites and it make me giggle hehehehhehe#okay! get out of my house *slams door*#also gonna try doing it only 3 colors each day. Smillee
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It honestly baffles me that some people are so casually dismissive of animals' feelings. Istg some ppl only see pets like toys and are barely able to hide it
#vent post alert#but I'm just so frustrated#my mom's dog got hit by a car yesterday and she refused to take him to the vet#she said she doesn't have any money for it and that he's fine#physically he seems fine just bruised. I think he might have something internal but she's been very dismissive of that#anyway. he spent the whole night crying bc he was alone and terrified#I went upstairs and almost begged her to take him to the vet but she still refused saying he was fine#then she put him inside her house and he calmed down after a while#the next morning when she came downstairs to talk to me she kept being dismissive#saying he was fine in the end he just wanted attention#and I'm like yeah?? obviously?? he got hit by a car???? the poor thing is traumatized and terrified#ofc he doesn't want to be alone#and she hit me with the 'dogs don't get traumatized. he's just being dramatic'#I pointed out some dogs have psychological pregnancy so ofc they have psychological problems too#and THEN she hit me with 'but those are female dogs. males are different. because hormones' like. WHAT#this just in not only do human males not have feelings but now dog males don't either. because hormones.#I thought my mom was smarter than this tbh#istg her boyfriend is just making her more ignorant. bc this is the kind of bs I expected to hear from him but not from her#anyway I don't know what to do. I don't have money for the vet either bc I just had to pay for a surgery#we talked and she said she'll monitor the dog and if he looks like he's getting worse she'll take him to the vet#ig I'll have to settle for that#I love my mom but man. this is weird#I just didn't expect it from her#what's worse is that when it's just her and me it's one thing. but when her bf is around I feel like she gets different#like with me she agrees but then around him she doesn't?? how am I supposed to trust her that way#it's all just so weird. idk what to think or what to feel rn. I just feel bad#sleep.txt
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Happy birthday to the stinky idiot !!
ver. without text under the cut:
#tokyo ghoul#tg#kaneki ken#ken kaneki#uh yeah bad news#exam week + the wifi at my house is down this week out of nowhere?? so i can't really post#but i managed to bust this out at least since i didn't wanna miss the silly day :))#i'm not sure what really happened tbh?? originally the plan was happy kuroneki just smiling and being happy it was his birthday :)#and then uh. then it turned into shironeki. and now he looks a little more Unhinged (wow it's just like canon)#but that's okay he deserves it i think. as a Treat#also don't ask me how i managed to color like that i think i got possessed mid-drawing and it made me pop off???#i am Never going to be able to recreate this orz#anyway happy birthday neki !!! you are a little bastard /affectionate
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The Crown Prince of Delusion
#when I tell you my traditional art and digital art look more like cousins than siblings this is what I mean#tbh I prefer the look of my traditional art a 🤏 wee bit more but shhhhhh#don’t tell my tablet that#sketch#Dimitri#art#fanart#my art#dimitri alexandre blaiddyd#fe3h#three houses#fire emblem three houses#fire emblem#doodle
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Chapter 11 — Bloodbath
#House of Ashes#Jason Kolchek#my gifsets#I don't like the doodle (though I do like inferring what it says about Jason's personality and his artistic abilities lol)#but I really think the cap suits Jason he just looks so nice wearing it#our boy knows how to accessorize y'all#...really wanna see him wearing a beret too tbh#SMG please give us a DLC that will give all the HoA characters berets#or maybe that's just me Idk
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-cracks knuckles-
I don't have twitter and I've never drawn a Miku before in my life, but I adore that trend happening rn and wanna drop down my two cents, so let's go with the research to make a Hatsune Miku: but she is from my family (hard to explain, but it's absolutely Texan)
#ghostie mumbles#looking up some native american jewelry from the ones in my genealogy to be accurate and true#as well as merging it with some casual wear and subtle cowboy stuff.#culture stuff for me and my family is very lowkey and more in what you'd see as little details scattered around the house--#--and houses of my relatives. so this is gonna be a very tame Miku but it's gonna be a nice little depiction of my heritage n stuff#I am going to have at least 1 piece of jewelry that represents the native american tribe sin my genealogy which is..#tbh.. as close as I am with that side of me. I'm so far removed that my physical features are so subtle you'd have to look closely to see i#everything I know came from my grandma on my dad's side and the powwows we have gone to when I was younger before they all--#--kinda.. stopped happening and moved to the big one called 'red earth' which is out of state for me#I liked the small ones.. the smells. the food. the music. getting to see the regalia of dancers.. the beautiful art and jewelry and trinket#--and figures you could buy.. it was always so nice getting to go.#at least the state fair has some stalls dedicated to native american artists who craft and sell similar things#one thing they don't have tho is the fry bread. and now I really want some. :(#ANYWAYS Gonna mark down the jewelry and the tribe name next to it as I find it and get that noted before moving on with everything else#I wanna make her look cute and interesting. will also definitely be looking into hairstyles and clothing. taking inspo from my own family#all this just for a dumb miku drawing#I do my best to try and do research for my pieces!!!! mostly.
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Bought one of my lil nephew giannis shoes for his birthday bcs he loves giannis and these are some of the ugliest fucking things I have ever laid my eyes on in my life. anyways it's his bday today so i gave them to him. but they are so ugly. he loves them
#i am not a sneakerhead#i wish i could be . finacially i can be. but mentally i cannot#i am not a car guy either. i could. but i cant mentally#bcs the only time id get smthing pretty is to look at it. and keep it safe#and then id want to km$ for not using smthing thats intended to be used bcs i hate wasted potential#once i got these rlly nice shoes#ive worn them once when i was trying them on#and i hate myself every day for doing that but also i just cant get them dirty#BUT I HATE THAT#some ppl can do that. they get a million things and only use it once and yea i COULD but psychologically i just CANT#im friends with a lot of sneakerheads and chain wearers and while i cant mentally make myself one#i can understand why they can#like ppl always wanna excuse not helping ppl by pointing at the stuff they already have#like oh u can buy urself a chain but cant buy ur momma and u a nicer place to live#like ok so credit scores are not existent then. especially when ppl use that phrase against ppl growing into crime like#yes they are making money now but is it good clean money? no. thats not gonna go into smthing long term n hefty like a house#chains are a rlly big thing bcs sometimes some jewelers just dont ask questions. hence bmf's jeweler getting roped into their crime schemes#any business can be like that btw. like michael jacksons doctor getting paid to kill him. the difficulty lvl just changes#and also. random ppl make fun of the stuff they can see or hear right in front of them#random ppl can and will make u feel bad abt any little thing they know or see the best bcs theyre assholes like that#u wear shoes all the time everywhere. thats more and more eyes noticing how old/dirty ur shoes are#or ur cars old n busted or ur phones a fucking android like it doesnt matter. the more ppl can see. the more theyll know#the more sensitive u get abt whats actually small to u at the start but big 2 them n then it gets big 2 u#anyways yea so like. i get it. i dont do it but i can see why others do#anyways yea these shoes are so ugly lol like i dont buy merch of my favs unless the style matches mine personally#he just liked them bcs they were giannis tbh n then i pointed out they were modeled after 1 of the jerseys#which made he rlly want them a while back so i surprised him today#but yea these things are ugly lol im glad he likes them but ew LMFAO
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why am i itching to write lissandra
#the way i've had my nose glued to her for years#idk if i'd write her in canon tho she's too niche tbh#being what she is.#but like i'd think of some crossover friendly verse for her#and i think in a modern au she'd be a model#me waving my asianifying wand over lissandra tho#bc i think her VA is asian#no white women in my house allowed (except lux)#and ok mf and kat but like don't look at me#ooc.#tbd.
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Whats the end goal for collecting mortals? You gonna drop everything you collected on a rock and call it good, like whats the point of all of this? What if their nothing left to collect, your jobs become meaningless, life would become meaningless, this is what mortals want to live their own live for is to find the good in life not to be stuck in stasis until the end of time. It's like a prison or a never ending nightmare we can't wake from. I think I would rather die.
The Curator: I would say "then die" but we aren't allowed to let you die. Real weird for you to act like any time at all has passed for you since you were Collected. That's the point. We Collect you, and if you are ever released it doesn't matter if it's been a million years, it will feel like you blinked. No prison or nightmares because it feels like blinking.
The Charmer: You act like mortals don't attempt to Collect either, especially Collecting just to Have. We are actually fully equipped to preserve what we Collect, while most other mortals pathetically attempt to preserve the creatures all around them, and sometimes even others of their own species, with terrible methods only used on the dead. They could only dream of preserving things that are still alive, for the rest of eternity, like we can.
The Cartographer: I must agree. The Collections created by mortals we visit are always infinitely more horrifying than what we do, especially since so many involve killing the creature being Collected. Pin boards of tiny, impaled mortal's corpses. Horrifying imitations of life made from the skins of dead mortals, cured into shape. Using chemicals that you inject into the flesh of the mortal to preserve them, or submerging them in chemicals entirely. It doesn't have to be something you like, but the way we Collect is infinitely more considerate.
The Charmer: It's not like any of the mortals get permission from the creatures around them that do not share their elevated sentience. So it strictly comes down to the permission of those mortals, and I have said this before, I am good at my job, so most come willingly. And we Collect to preserve the life of the mortals.
#ask blog#ask the archivists#asks are open#toh the archivists#the owl house#toh#toh oc#the archivists#id in alt text#ask to tag#I will say that as long as it's not taken to the extremes they go to#collecting like how they do would kick ass tbh#Look me in the eyes and tell me people who Collect bugs wouldn't want what they have#no hate or judgement to people who do those collections btw#I wrote a snippet for the fic I'm making where I adopt the Collector#and I bring up those sorts of collections to reassure him that Collecting by itself isn't bad#because it's really not? Like definitely not any worse than hunting or fishing or collecting bugs#my sibling sent this in and I was like 'girl they are going to tear you limb from limb'
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Day 27/October 27: Swim || Hide || "I'll just stay inside."
oh my GOD i started and finished this in a day almost NONSTOP i told myself oh it’ll just be a sketch or doodle or something you probably won’t have the time or motivation to do it really detailed and I GOT CARRIED AWAY AND WHAM 5 HOURS GONE
flat plus closeups
i pray cropping the pictures doesn’t crunch them
#i kinda like it actually#i love dramatic contrasting lighting#my goal was to make morro and the deck dark and shadowy and gloomy in contrast to the ninja bright and having fun outside#but i don’t think that really came through#i PRAY it doesn’t desaturate PLEASE#WHY IS IT ALWAYS SO DESATURATED ON MY COMPUTER#i’m not very sure where morro is tbh#beach house?? he’s definitely sitting on a deck or balcony of some sort#the way my brain works is i read the prompt and the idea flashes in my mind clearly but not clear at all#so i have to sit there and unblur the gaps in my mind like ai autofill#all i knew was he was sitting at the side on a deck or balcony or a similar surface elevated above the beach#or maybe hes inside looking out the window but i went with outside#point is we see his back and hes leaning on something#and hes looking out at the ninja having fun in the water#in an ideal world the ninja would be actually drawn and detailed but this is not that world#sorry i didn’t try for zane i had no idea what to do and i needed to spread them out#idk how to draw beaches or water so once again morrotober forcing me to try new things#thats a good thing actually cause it forces me to improve ish#shoutout to the beach palette on hipaint idk what i wouldve done without you#ninjago#lego ninjago#morro ninjago#ninjago morro#morro wu#morrotober#morrotober2023#morrotober 2023#i’m not gonna tag the ninja#jellos scribbles
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Ep 5!!!
#Episodes that make me go “The author has never talked with a woman ever” 😓😓😓#I don't like how Lucy's character is handled at all. And I feel like I can't talk about it because I'm just going to sound like a bitter–#ss/kk shipper... But I really don't like it. And if it can help my case I'm a multishipper so I really don't take any–#issues with atsu/lucy I like the ship quite a lot actually.#So you're telling me there's this girl... Who meets this boy who pretty much ruined her life by directly causing her to lose her job...#And the next time she sees him she's going to sacrifice her own freedom for him as well as tell him “when you're done doing your things–#come and save me” (longest ewwww ever)... And when she regains freedom (author didn't bother to explain how because they don't care)–#she goes to work... As a waitress at the café beneath his workplace. So he can keep doing his Cool Superpowers Job while she literally–#must serve him every time he visits the place. It's just ?????????????????????????????????#Look‚ I don't dislike Lucy and I feel general affection towards her. It's just that they make her act like no one ever would#Just for the sake of the plot I guess#And like I knoww it's (probably just a little) more nuanced than that. I know Lucy is living her own fairy tale fantasy.#It's just that what I've said about her story is still true‚ you know?#I'm sorry but as sweet as atsu/lucy can be. I really hate the author for making Lucy a waitress. Sorry. Sorry. Sorry.#It's so weird. This anime has women writing standards that feel like dating back to the 20s#Same with Katai and the ideal woman tbh. Like why are women to be seen as this abstract impersonal entities? Why can't they just be people?#Ideal for WHO. It's like super screwed up of a concept. What even is an ideal woman? What does it mean to be a woman anyways?#They just want to say “ideal wife”. But women aren't made to be wives their existence isn't functional to another person.#Sorry. I derail. Next episode is going to be even worse on this front ughhhh#Back to the episode: once again it really shows they were running out of budget with this season‚‚‚ the animation looks very suffered#Too many flashback also... I feel bad for the animators tbh#I don't really like the shift in art style :( Not even Atsushi I found particularly pretty this episode my heart cries#The nail pulling thing made me feel like throwing up afhsjyabfsbfwasfvb I feel like I can bear worse gore but there's a couple of little–#specific things I can't stand and this seems to be one of them pffftttt#I like Higuchi I think she's both very funny and cool. I really wish she was explored more (but then again looking at Teruko... )#The relationship between Kunikida and Katai looks so interesting even though we only get glimpses of it. Kunikida regrets Katai leaving–#the ada but is also happy for him but also worries for him. He comes to his house seemingly to check on him and starts cleaning around.#The way he loves him and cherishes their friendship and shared history is really evident and it makes for a compelling dynamic.#Perhaps I should read their short story... In any case. Going to someone's house and compulsively start doing the dishes half out of will–#to help out half because he can't bear the mess sounds a lot like something I'd do lol
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....
#y'all i would really appreciate prayer for a decision i have to make this week#(keep in mind i got back to canada like. less than 48 hours ago so my mental capacity is iffy lol)#i have had a job opportunity at my college literally fall into my lap#its an exec assistant position which tbh is very much the sort of thing i was hoping to find for this year#i would just have to commit for one academic year which would be perfect#id learn a lot#and id get discounted tuition to finish ny second degree here.#BUT it would mean finding housing and moving to my college town probably within the next month#it would be yet another big change in my life#I'd be farther from family and from The Boy#and i was rwally looking forward to lots of things about living with my parents (also stressed about other aspects#but rn the familiarity and stability sounds amazing)#so im really torn. idk what to choose.
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...
#man ive never seen an eating disorder kill someone else besides a parent infecting a child but my nana is really trying#shes like 1000% orthotexic. will not eat anything not filled with vegetables or fat. and my grandpa is 87yo with a heart condition currentl#in the hospital for covid bc thry went to Christmas church and dont believe in being vaccinated and my dad is so frustrated#bc he knows his mom is not gonna give his dad hearty foods. he needs to eat like protein shakes and meat and ice cream. anything thats not#her cooking which sucks on top of being extremely healthy. except its not healthy bc they dont eat a balanced diet#so its my nanas eating disorder killing her husband and shes so fucking frustrating. im like 99% sure she has obsessive compulsive#personally disorder bc she fits to a T and has zero insight. she may have full on 0cd bc talking to my dad he has more obvious 0cd#compulsions than i do. he used to say phrases before going to bed and would take 2 steps across the floor to prevent bad things from#happening. so like im pretty sure my nana is where i get my perfectionism and 0cd. god. i wish i could express how fucked up she is#like my dad said at least he had a stable home to grow up in but like she has zero sympathy for other people. cannot look past herself. wil#not wear a mask bc she doesnt care enough abt other ppl. my dad was like: u would not have survived in that house. which is fair bc i am#barely keeping it together coming from a stable home with two sympathetic parents who i know love me#and like its sad that they're suffering the effects of buying into the fox news bullshit and its killing them#but also. genuinely. i think theyre not very good ppl. theyre the type of people who think they're better bc they're religious. white. and#thin. and theyre not better thsn anyone. their grandchildren cant stand them. well cant stand her at least. papa is just quite so its hard#to say what hes thinking. apparently he was confused last night and saying something about eating dinner on the golf course. which sounds#nicer thsn being in the hospital lol. ugh. he seems not long for this world tbh. may he pass peacefully to b with his 1st wife who died of#brain cancer at age like 20 or something. so it goes. bleh. how many funerals are intended for me in the next 5 years? hopefully none but#that seems improbable with the unspoken drain circling that seems to b going on in this family. old age and like almost 10 years of cancer#defying the stats but for how much longer?#i dunno. its just so weird to watch these things happen and not talk about it directly to the other ppl who see it#i worry that ill come off as too callose or inappropriate bc i have that tendency when something bad is happening but thats everyone else#excuse? idk i just feel like its better to talk abt things#unrelated#ed mention#i tell u this so i can say these things to someone and also bc if i were u. i would like to hear the drama#bc im nosey and i assume other r too ;-]
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I'm not gonna screenshot it bc 1/it really doesn't matter that much and 2/the person who made the comment is a kid but: a while ago I made a comic that's supposed to be a genuine study and reinterpretation of someone else's sprite comic (made in the spirit of authenticity too - to recreate the vibes of the sprite comics from that era, iirc very specifically because it's funny) and I got a comment on that comic's post that's like "glow up"
which is a compliment obvs. and the commenter probably didn't mean anything by it, it's a common expression. but I've been trying to find a way to gracefully put that comment away ever since it appeared lol
I just very much don't want my art to be taken as trying to one-up someone else's art when that's not the piece's intention. especially when the piece that inspired my art is perceived as "low effort" or "shitpost" or stuff like that. I did mention in the tags of that post that my considering it a study is entirely genuine, and I can legitimately write pages about the cool stuff I find in it other than and inherent in the haha funneys, but that's not for you guys that's for me. I just think that approaching art competition-first like that is a miserable way to do it, and (tipping into overthinking here if the whole tiny-comment-got-stuck-in-my-brain-for-almost-a-month part hasn't given that away yet lol) I really don't want that to be the takeaway from my own art. at least generally. if I actually think the source material is trash and what I'm doing is genuinely categorically better I'd just come out and say it lmao
#bakuspeech#yeah it's the darkhog sprite comic#honestly I don't love comments that put my art and other artists' art in a hierarchy in general. wherever my art lands on that scale#especially when it comes to character writing and trans 'representation'#which like. idk man I'm writing One character. he's NOT gonna be The Trans Experience. he's gonna be one character.#but yeah I'd guess I'm writing it all out in a post bc it's not really a race that anyone opts in#I don't actively participate but by virtue of how my art is perceived I just end up on the scale anyway#so uh. I'm suggesting that we do not bring the scale into my house at all lmao#there's also the like. Don't Yuck My Yum guideline of looking at art that's like#I like the things I'm aping! most of the times! if I don't say it's shit and I'm drawing stuff from it usually that means I like it lol#and then you kinda come in like wow what you're doing here is better than the thing you like. and it's not like yknow.#really anything. it's extremely trivial comparatively. but you are in fact yucking my yum there#tldr please try not to think abt art u like vs art u don't as ''better'' or ''worse'' and#have grace for the things that don't please u personally. anyways I'm omw to finishing the frog now. just need to fell all the seams down#and put that boy in da spinner for a ride. and then it can live in a gift bag until the day#I really enjoy holding it actually... maybe after this one I'll make something else. tbh slick stretchy fabrics are superior to fuzzy fabri#doesn't pill And cooler to touch. stuffed toys for the subtropical population#I'll get a combilation of pics once the thing's at its new home. but for now. we must finish the job
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One moonlit night, you're in the middle of preparing a little bedtime snack, when you get a surprise visit from a certain friend of yours…
(Sebastian x reader)
#i wrote the rough pass for this on the 12th and now it's the 22nd and it's done yippee#this man rlly has taken over my brain cell#i don't write a lot of fic anymore but i figured this would make for good writing practice and open me up for some feedback so i can improv#so feel free to give me constructive criticism; it will only make me a better writer#sdv sebastian#stardew sebastian#stardew valley fanfic#fanfic#my writings#light spoilers in tags past this point so fair warning#i relate to this character a lot so i projected some of my own kinda feelings onto him lol; figure it helps the writing#reader is kinda just me tbh lmfao; so the story's written as gay but also i didn't imply the reader's gender in any way#happy pride month y'all#was tired of seeing demetrius portrayed as straight up malicious so i wanted to try smth else#give it up for cindy the potted plant everyone#i picture her as house plant 7 but feel free to imagine w/e you want; i didn't describe what she looks like
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highly considering getting a second job, if possible. i want OUT of this house, to find a suitable rental and eventually maybe muster enough savings for a house loan or something
#oddity.txt#tbh the rental and housing market here is soooo bad#daylight robbery on a weekly or fortnightly basis#my dad keeps on insisting on me doing full time at university because “by my age i should already be in my desired field”#look man idc if i break into the industry next year or in five years time. i'm still young#what matters to ME is that i have financial security and also mental health security#(the latter in constant jeopardy because living with parents is like taking hourly poison damage)
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