#this is what happens when you just want to talk about one episode but end up bringing up three others

[castlebyersthoughts]

The placement of Mike's monologue in the series says so much

We all know this but I still want to talk about it. The Duffers knew they were making 5 seasons and they decided that the characters would lose at the end of 4. Their biggest loss in 4 seasons. The audience is meant to feel scared and uneasy while watching this episode. It's not a happy, hopeful episode, it's supposed to leave you sad and heartbroken and feeling like the world is ending. And what did they choose to put right in the middle of it, as the emotional climax of the episode? Mike "professing his love" to El. That choice is crazy, when you think about it. If Mike and El were supposed to be this great couple, wouldn't they use Mike's love confession during a time when all hope seems lost as a turning point leading to victory?

If they wanted a big romantic scene where Mike confesses his feelings, they had 5 seasons where they could have written it, literally 42 episodes to choose from. They could've put it in season 3 since that was already part of Mike's arc, or saved it for season 5 when love truly conquers evil and they actually save the world. But they chose the one episode in the series where the gang loses. This love did not conquer evil. It's followed by Max's death, Eddie's death, and the Upside Down literally leaking into Hawkins.

Narratively, Mike and El as a couple can never come back from this. Because they didn't just have their own little parallel storyline, like Jopper who did kiss and get together this season, no, the Duffers chose to put this love confession directly in the middle of the supernatural storyline, as a way to try to stop Vecna. And even if it worked at first, it ultimately failed to give them the victory. It would be a different story, maaaybe, if they had a sweet scene acknowledging the monologue, ending with a promise to fight together and a kiss, but that didn't happen. Mike and El's love didn't save the world, it just wasn't right, because it came from Will's lie (and the truth behind it) instead of them directly, and now the Duffers can't use it again next season. We need another love to save the world in season 5. And what love in the show is actually still left unspoken?

[zivazivc]

How do you think Les would act toward Floyd older? After the third movie, I mean.

Calmer, and stable Floyd, who I'm guessing actually got some help in the village. Maybe Floyd got help by talking things out there with someone, like therapy-ish. Or, just his brothers helping him through it all, because that's probably what he needed.

Seeing him happier than when he last saw him.

And, his new hair! I mean, him learning of everything that happened.

Would they get together again, or rekindle whatever reasonship (staying just friends?)

Ohh my story has gone through so many changes and updates that I haven't really talked about on here so it's hard to answer this ask straightforwardly now. 😅

I have caved and decided Les and Floyd still end up together so... 🙈

"I thought you were dead..." | "'M sorry."

Here's an updated version of this old post:

The timeline right now is more or less the same with them having a nasty breakup when Floyd is 22. The cause for it is that until that point Floyd only has hypomanic episodes which raise some eyebrows but they aren't that concerning to anyone, not with the kind of lifestyle they are having anyway. But at the time of the breakup he suffers from full-blown mania with psychosis for the first time which hurts both him as well as Les and the other bandmates.

Then there's the 2 year period where they are apart and Floyd falls hard into substance abuse and bad habits. Then Les bumps into him at a party and gets them to talk outside. It's clear to both that they feel incredibly sorry about what happened when they broke up. Floyd quickly after coming down from his mania realized that what he believed was going was all a delusion his brain convinced him of. And Les feels responsible for the addicted and mentally unwell state Floyd has ended up in.

There's still love there but so much hurt and the trust they had is damaged to the point they're unsure if it's fixable. Neither of them knows how to even address what went down in those days leading up to the breakup.

Les decides to help Floyd get back on his feet but he doesn't want him near the band anymore. He's convinced that the band isn't good for him anyway. He finds him a place to stay and a job in a remote town where not much goes on so he has a chance to sober up. The band at this point is still trying to make it work by doing gigs, so Les visits him little by little in between to check on him during this time period.

They go back to being friends gradually and Floyd shows interest in getting back together romantically from early on while Les has trust issues he can't get past. Les is very reserved and non-confrontational when it comes to addressing his hurt so he doesn't bring it up. Floyd is usually the one who would make those conversations happen, but Floyd at this point isn't aware that he has bipolar and doesn't understand what happened (is happening) to him, and he is very uncomfortable addressing it too.

But eventually they can no longer tiptoe around the topic of their breakup. Les wants to know what happened and why Floyd accused him of the things he did - which to Les it felt like Floyd took everything Les had confided in him regarding his childhood abuse and throwing it back in his face. Floyd feels awful because the only explanation he has is that at the time he really thought they were true. He tells him that he knows they aren't true but that something was really really wrong with him. He tries to explain what he was going through the best he can and he also tells him that whenever he tried to address it back then he was accused of constantly getting high on worms behind their backs which is what caused his paranoia to spiral.

The conversation doesn't answer everything but it makes it clear to both that neither of them wanted to hurt the other person, especially not intentionally. Which is what allows them to make the step into getting back together.

But not long after this Floyd suffers another strong manic episode and messes up at his job and books it out of that town. Once Les finds him and sees him in that hyper and erratic state again but now with more understanding, he tries his hardest to bring it down and help, and he finally firmly tells him that he needs to get professional help. Floyd doesn't like the idea of going to therapy so he says he'll go only if Les goes too to work out his own trauma. Around this point it's also when the band officially breaks up (they just couldn't ever recover after losing Floyd and Liv) so Les has no excuses to give why he can't go and he eventually agrees.

Floyd finally gets his bipolar diagnosis (yay!) and gets "meds" for it, and this revelation also helps both of them to really put the breakup incident behind them.

After this point they're more or less together. I say "more or less" because they're not in a conventional relationship and they're not following the classic rules of being a couple. They know each other inside out and are both deeply and unconditionally in love with each other but whatever they have looks more like casual dating that's been going on for more than a decade. Sometimes they live together like an old married couple and sometimes they don't and they keep in touch through letters and scheduled calls in phone booths.

One day during their "apart time" Floyd stops answering those scheduled calls and Les gets worried and sets out to look for him, which turns into a desperate months-long search while tensions in the country are high, non Rock Trolls are getting arrested and disappearing left and right, and the Rock Kingdom is secretly planning their invasion of the other kingdoms.

.

.

.

[gatorbites-imagines]

(TW: miscarriage mention)

I’m a bit hungry for some angst. How do you think the other variants would react to one of the pregnant Marks having a miscarriage?

If I was boring, I'd say that it was prisoner Mark who has a miscarriage. But, just for fun, what if its sinister Mark? Like, eating so much human flesh over time, and all his usual violence and games can't be good for pregnancy, right? 

This would most likely happen during his first pregnancy, when he doesn't really take it too seriously or care too much about his diet and safety. Imagine his surprise when he starts bleeding, stuff starts hurting, and that life he could feel inside him is gone. 

I think it takes him a good while to like, accept it. Sinister seems to be the type to also lose it when the other Marks start caring for him, even if it's just checking up on him, because he sees it as them pitying him. 

Sinister isn't the most stable guy, so he might also start having a whole episode about some of the others still being pregnant and he isn't. For a good while he just falls back into anger, and the reader and other Marks would have to talk him down. 

In the end, emperor Mark is the one who needs to hold him still cuz hes just physically stronger, as reader has to really get it into sinisters head that it's okay to be sad, to be hurting, but he shouldn't let that out on the rest of them. 

Sinister Mark still doesn't like appearing weak, but it would end up with him just finally letting go and sobbing about it, cuz he feels like such a damn failure.  

I personally have no experience with miscarriage, so i don't want to say a whole lot about what Sinister Mark does to heal from it, and to stop blaming himself.  

But the other Marks would be more kind, for a while lmao, until he's back to himself. And would let sinister take part in their pregnancies and kids. This also means Sinister might be one of the last Marks to have his own kid, cuz reader and others help him understand he should heal first before trying again, ya know? 

[miraculouslbcnreactions]

Since you’ve talked about the secret between Adrien and Mari and how Adrien has no agency, back when the s5 bible leaked, there was a part where it said that „Adrien will never find out about his father being Hawkmoth“ or something like that.

Do you think the writers will actually stick with that rule? Because I just can‘t see how this is supposed to be narratively satisfying…

I have no idea and that's not a compliment. It's a condemnation. Adrien should absolutely find out about his father. The story isn't satisfying if he doesn't. But Miraculous doesn't seem to care about being satisfying. It cares about being shocking and that's a terrible thing. To explain why, let's talk about the topic of predictability in narratives and why it's generally a good thing.

We'll start with a quote from a famous George R.R. Martin interview where he perfectly explains why you want your stories to make logical sense with the final line of the quote being the most important part:

Before the Internet, one reader could guess the ending you wanna do for your novel, but the other 10.000 wouldn’t know anything and they would be surprised. However, now, those 10.000 people use the Internet and read the right theories. They say: “Oh God, the butler did it!”, to use an example of a mystery novel. Then, you think: “I have to change the ending! The maiden would be the criminal!” To my mind that way is a disaster because if you are doing well you work, the books are full of clues that point to the butler doing it and help you to figure up the butler did it, but if you change the ending to point the maiden, the clues make no sense anymore; they are wrong or are lies, and I am not a liar.

This is a writing rule that I believe in my soul, but that the Miraculous writers don't seem to care about. Miraculous will introduce things that should be important to the story, but they end up meaning nothing.

A great - and relevant - example of this is the Chat Blanc stuff. Chat Blanc comes near the end of season three, early season four sees Marinette have a nightmare about Chat Blanc, and late season four is all about Chat Noir feeling left out as Marinette trusts Alya over him. Many viewers looked at these story beats and went, "Oh, okay, so Chat Blanc is causing Marinette to push Chat Noir away. Got it." because it honestly was the only thing that made any sense.

But that's not what was going on. The official word is that Marinette was just stressed over her new role as the guardian even though nothing in the text really explains why that would strain her relationship with Chat Noir. It actively improves her relationship with Alya! Why wouldn't it do the same with her long-term partner? As we've discussed several times, he was fine with the status quo at the start of the season and didn't even ask for more responsibility until Kuro Neko so it's not like he was doing anything to stress her out until he randomly quit on her.

This begs the question: if Chat Blanc isn't haunting Marinette and Chat Noir isn't stressing her, then why doesn't she share things with Chat Noir? Why go with Alya when Alya's identity was revealed to the villain requiring Alya to go into "hiding" as Rena Furtive? There's really nothing in the text to answer those incredibly important questions. Question that are only incredibly important because the writers actively chose to have multiple episodes dedicated to Chat Noir feeling left out. Why that happened really isn't clear so there's also no clear resolution. What needs to change? No clue! Did that thing change? Once again, no clue! It's all set up with no pay off!

Or, at least, we don't get the kind of pay off you'd expect to see. Aka the big dramatic moment where Ladybug finally confesses what happened to her. Instead, Chat Blanc's big pay off is Adrien missing the season five fight because he just magically knows that Chat Blanc happened:

During the scene that leads to Adrien wearing the Alliance ring after being reticent to it, [the writers] say that they had a conflict when writing it as they had to find a way for Adrien to not become his superhero self, cataclysm the walls and go help his lady in Paris. The end result is that Adrien is reminded of the devastating effect of his power by the nightmare and would therefore do anything to avoid hurting people, and so he wears the ring. Mélanie says that he "could become Chat Blanc" and the others add that even though he does not remember and has never lived it, Chat Blanc still has an influence on his actions.

So Chat Blanc doesn't matter to the person who actually met him, but it does matter to the person who was Chat Blanc an alternate timeline even though this show has never once showed another akuma victim to be haunted by their akumatization. Does that make any sense? No, it's frustrating and confusing, but it does tell us the way these writers think and that insight doesn't bode well for Adrien learning the truth about his father. It's not enough for me to say with certainty that it will never happen, but I would not assume that it will happen. The show has an active pattern of avoiding these kinds of payoffs:

Example 1: Multiple Lila appearances had her claiming to be Ladybug's BFF and she was even interviewed for the Ladyblog based on this lie, but as soon as Alya learns Ladybug's identity, the show conveniently forgets about this ongoing lie because then Alya would be against Lila and the writers didn't want that.

Example 2: Marinette gave Alya the Fox without telling Chat Noir that they had a new full-time teammate, but Chat Noir never learns about this development. The most he gets is that Ladybug revealed her identity to someone, which is nowhere near as important as the Rena thing in terms of the ongoing fight against Paris' resident supervillain. The fact that Rena Rouge is now Rena Furtive is literally never revealed to him. He learns that she's active in the final fight, but the name change and her status are forever a secret. Alya being Rena Furtive also leads to nothing useful for the heroes. You could remove that from season four and it would play almost exactly the same same for a few minor tweaks.

Example 3: Luka learns Ladybug and Chat Noir's identities in Wishmaker, but this reveal is just used as an excuse to write Luka off the show in season five. The episode that gets him written off shows Monarch realizing that Luka knows the identities because of some mental connection that happens during akumatization. This is damning because Kagami was akumatized twice in season five (Perfection and Protection) and we later learn that Kagami learned Marinette's secret identity during Perfection, the first of the two episodes. In fact, Kagami learned the secret mere minutes before getting akumatized and she was akumatized because Marinette wasn't talking to her so Marinette being Ladybug should have been on her mind and yet Monarch didn't get so much as a hint of any of this!!!!!

That's not even getting into the issue of the fact that nothing in Perfection so much as hints that Kagami knows even though the episode is all about her relationship with Marinette or the issue of Marinette keeping her secret identity safe even though she was almost akumatized the freaking times! SOMEONE PLEASE MAKE IT MAKE SENSE!!! WHY IS IT WRITTEN LIKE THIS??? How is anyone supposed to follow such shitty lore? The audience can't text appropriately if they don't know what the stakes are.

So, yeah, I'd put a small amount of money on Adrien never learning because that would be way too satisfying and Miraculous hates being satisfying or logical. The times we do get big reveals are generally terrible like with freaking Andre the Ice Cream Man being the one to tell Adrien about Marinette's crush or Lila being outed because of a plan Sabrina and Marinette made up off screen or Adrien finding out about Chat Blanc because magic. Watch Andre the Ice Cream Man be the one to tell Adrien about his dad for some reason. Nothing would surprise me at this point.

[sunflowermc]

Finally, i finished this.

Meet Seo Ji-woo aka Malieon

I enjoy creating characters who seem ‘good’ on the surface but are actually pretty messed up.

Few things abt Malieon:

Personality

Malieon plays the part of the lazy, easygoing guy pretty damn well. A little too well, maybe. He cracks jokes, shrugs things off, keeps everything light—because the moment things get too real, too raw, he’s got nowhere to hide. Turning pain into humor isn’t just a habit; it’s survival. And sure, sometimes his jokes get a little sharp, a little too on-the-nose, but it’s not because he doesn’t care. If anything, it’s the opposite.

And then there’s the other thing. The part of him he doesn’t talk about, doesn’t even like to acknowledge—the part that’s wired all wrong. Like some self-inflicted cycle of wanting and hating in the same breath. He laughs it off, plays it down, pretends it doesn’t bother him, because that’s easier than admitting how deep it actually cuts. But every time he gives in, there’s that gnawing disgust afterward, like he’s just found another way to break himself a little more.

And then there’s him. The other voice in his head. The one that came to life when Mali was too young, too broken to fight back. He’s colder, sharper, built for survival in a way Mali never was. But he doesn’t want to take over—he’s not here to win. He’s here to protect. To keep Mali breathing, whether Mali likes it or not. He’ll mock him, taunt him, push his buttons just because he can—but at the end of the day, when it actually matters? He’s the last person who’d ever leave him behind.

Backstory:

Malieon once had a peaceful life—his parents, his friends, everything he cherished. As a child, he adored manga like Doraemon, Sailor Moon,v.v.. but it wasn’t until middle school that he truly found his passion for painting.

Then came the tragedy when he was ten. A single moment that shattered everything, followed by years of relentless bullying throughout middle school. It broke him—so much so that his mind created another personality to shield himself from the pain.

He barely remembers those years. Or maybe he chooses not to. By the time he entered high school, he had no interest in making friends. But then there was Minhyeok—the most annoying, irreplaceable person in his life—dragging him out of his downward spiral.

Time passed, and for once, Mali thought there was nothing left that could truly destroy him.

He stood there, blood splattered across his hands—Minhyeok’s blood. His body still warm, his fingers twitching ever so slightly, as if mocking Mali with the fact that life was slipping away right in front of him.

And he could do nothing.

No. No.

He clenched his fists so tightly that his nails dug into his palms, his voice raw with desperation as he lifted his gaze to the darkness around him.

“I want a deal.”

A low chuckle echoed through the air, thick with something.. predatory.

“Your ancestor Solomon said the same thing when he met me, you know.”

The presence loomed closer, suffocating, pressing against Mali’s very soul. But he didn’t care. He didn’t care about the consequences, about what would happen to him.

All that mattered was Minhyeok.

So he made the deal.

Bro is seriously struggling with the constant hypersexual episodes.

[whispersleo]

TOTALLY YAPPING BUT UGH TAAAAAAASH see, this is one of the things that made me completely fall in love with the character and I don't understand when people later said that them being autistic was just a headcanon when??? Dude like this is. This is a thing. A real thing a lot of people with autism experience.

Everything must turn out a certain way, and when it doesn't, we can experience this blinding rage. I've hit people because things didn't go the way I thought they would. I've raged and screamed because things didn't go the way I expected. It's this feeling that consumes you and blinds you and it's just this complete overload that makes you react intensely and that overwhelms you. I can't describe the number of times I've had to be physically restrained because something went wrong and I just broke down and got fucking stuck on it!!! Like why I'm being held on the floor by two grown ass adults just because my favorite shirt was ruined before an important event? Why do strangers have to keep me sitting with their hands holding my body on a park bench after I received a bad medical diagnosis? Why can't I stop screaming and crying and kicking? All that shit people don't want to talk about sometimes, that part of your brain that just shuts down and goes to hell! Because yeah you have autism and this is a thing that just fucking happens.

I love you Taash. Talking about their fear that the antaam might turn them into a berserker and I could only sigh and smile with my cheeks all red because holy shit if this wasn't my brain when my little sister cut up my favorite pair of socks, I don't know what else it is, honestly.

And Taash proves to you in the game that they can be broken, but Taash is the character with the most mature emotional intelligence of all of the Veilguard team and like me, they CAN and WILL return to themselves. They can cry and feel bad, but that anger doesn't explode. And it feels good to see them and think that I myself haven't had a similar episode in years.

Taash is strong, terrifyingly strong. They also had Rook to accompany them. We don't know exactly what happened to them during the island and their return to the Lighthouse, but we know that Taash is whole despite everything. That's what I love most about them.

They're afraid of going berserker and wiping out everything in their path, and I'm glad it never happens. Would it have been interesting as a "bad ending" option? Maybe. But if I know one thing, it's that Taash would always come back to themselves.

I feel too much. Like it's all I can see. I build it up in my mind and if it's not like that in the real world it's like... I get stuck.

[llamaisllama777]

THE (NOT)DAILY/(NOT)WEEKLY TSAMS, FEMNAFS, AND EAPS REVIEW SHOW!

Hey, everyone. It's been a bit since I last did one of these cause I took a break for a bit, but now I'm back. Let's talk about today's episodes. My gosh, were they great.

The B*tch came back!

Ladies, gentlemen, and simps alike.

He's back.

Our emo boy is back! Nexus is back! But he seems... off?

I think it's Nexus... kinda.

I think it's his shade (like a shadow of sorts or the physical embodiment of all the dark star power that was in Nexus, but that's a theory for another time)

Point is! 👏 Nexus is back, and he's after Dazzle. He wants to make Sun suffer for killing him and plans on making his death hurt by going after Dazzle.

Sun and Moon are now contemplating leaving this dimension entirely to avoid all the chaos here, especially the star stuff chaos.

Honestly...

They should have left sooner. This dimension has been nothing but chaos, so I saw leave, take Monty and Earth with ya. Solar and Jack, too. Leave this place! Go to Good!Sven's universe. He would love to have you there!

It would be nice for Sun, Moon, and Earth to have a dad who actually cares.

Also, this episode made me realize Sun has killed a lot of people with fire or fire related things,huh?

Roxas, dude, I want to like you, I do like you, even after this stunt...

BUT!

If you didn't want to go on the date, just reschedule!

You didn't have to go through the motions and act like a disinterested piece of [Beep]!

Sunny was excited for the date and was so sad when he dipped.

Roxas look don't be a tease.

Sunny likes you

And I have a feeling you like her too.

I saw how you were flirting with her in the episode where we met Roxas.

Roxas, please, you may have just become the Femnaf's fandom's public enemy number 1# for this stunt.

I still have hope that Roxny will happen. I can see it, I like it, I ship it. But right now, Roxas, pray. Pray Moonie and the fan base don't kill ya.

And last but certainly not least...

Wow. This Henry is a [Beep]ing terrible person! I mean, I know every Henry isn't perfect. They're all flawed, but gosh, dang!

You allow Vincent to run amok and kill other kids just to keep Afton at bay? What the [Beep] Hen?!

Eclipse is fully in his right to be mad! Henry is not only allowing innocent kids to die, but he also knew the whole time what was happening. He knew everything, about Eclipse, Puppet, Foxy, Puppetmaster, Charlie he knew it all!

He could have helped, but didn't.

(That's messed up for a lot of reasons, like you could have helped here, man)

I get that Henry is trying to prevent Afton from getting a new body by hiding Vincent, but that is no excuse. You helped a child killer serial killer just to prevent another from rising?

That's like, do you wanna get shot in the foot with a revolver or a pistol. It's still gonna hurt. It's still bad.

(And I think it uses the same rounds?)

Eclipse, I don't blame you for wanting to kill Henry. This Henry probably deserves death. I also understand why Charlie protected Henry cause at the end of the day...

that is her dad. Even if he isn't her version of him.

But Eclipse is right. He ain't the hero. He never asked to be.

But now he's stuck playing good guy cause no one else can.

I feel so bad for Eclipse, he just wants his kids back.

I hope he can save them and take both Vincent, Afton, and Henry down.

Amazing episodes!

11/10! 👏 👏 👏

[heloflor]

Ok so last week I saw the videos/screenshots talking about fop Peri which got me a bit curious about this show, and after seeing “Battle of the Dimmsonian” and especially the Cosmo-Wanda-Peri part of “Lost in Fairy World” (there’s someone on Tumblr posting clips of all the Peri-centric moments since his debut), I was genuinely impressed with how the characters were written and I wanted to gush about them! On top of doing some overanalysis of those characters. Btw I also saw some clips from “Operation: Birthday Takeback” (again the Cosmo-Wanda-Peri side of it).

So here’s a post talking about Cosmo and Wanda’s relationship with Peri, Peri in general, Peri with Dev and a few other random thoughts about the early episodes given this made me start to watch the show (ended up making it its own post), though I haven’t gone far yet (I’m on like episode 5-6, which is episode 4a or something). On that note, take what I say in this post with a HUGE grain of salt since I don’t have the full context for Dev’s character arc.

Tl;Dr: The Fairywinkle-Cosmas are adorable, loving but also realistic in their portrayal.

Peri is the definition of “20 years-old who recently left his parents’ home” and I love him for it.

Dev and Peri are a terrible match due to Peri’s inexperience, Dev not taking him seriously, and Dev’s daddy issues making it hard for him to connect with a fairy who has loving parents.

(Btw on top of the characters moments, what made me start to watch the show is also the fact it’s apparently incredibly wholesome and fun + apparently the writers of “Infi//nity Train” worked on it (and if that’s true it’s crazy how nobody is talking about it to bring in new fans; I mean remember when the Duck//tales reboot came out and everyone pointed out how the writers of Gra//vity Falls worked on it? We should do the same thing here, at least again if it’s true) + Hartman isn’t involved and it’s hilarious how the creator of those characters not getting involved is a good thing)

Oh and spoilers for “Battle of the Dimmsonian”, “Lost in Fairy World” and “Operation: Birthday Takeback”! (4.6k Words below)

--

Ok so “Lost In Fairy World” and why I love its characters’ writing so much. I’m actually going to start by the lesson at the end and build from there as it seems like the best way to get a train of thought going.

So the lesson of the episode for me was basically a “new hire vs experienced employees” with a second layer added due to the three fairies being family, and that’s already something I really appreciate!

By the end of the episode, Cosmo and Wanda learn that they need to back off and let Peri do his thing. He’s an adult, he got hired for a reason, let him do his own trial and error and learn his own way. But at the same time, Peri shouldn’t be afraid to ask for help or advice if he needs it, the more experienced people are here for that! And again, there’s the family layer to that discussion that I really like, with Cosmo and Wanda being particularly clingy bc Peri is their son, while Peri is particularly embarrassed to ask them for help because they’re his parents, probably not helped by the fact he likely very recently left their home and seeks his independence.

And that’s another thing I absolutely love after watching this episode and “Battle of the Dimmsonian”, with “Operation: Birthday Takeback” adding to it as well: Honestly, Peri has to be one of the most realistic depictions of “20-something who just left his parents’ house” I’ve ever seen (yeah I don’t watch much stuff outside of cartoons, working on that). They somehow managed to make him very clearly be an adult with adult responsibilities, all the while giving him a level of inexperience and immaturity that reminds you he’s still young.

Giving some examples, the way he talks in general makes it obvious he’s an adult, and when introducing himself to Dev + telling him he can’t visit Fairy World in “Lost in Fairy World”, he has that suave put-together personality to himself. But at the same time this suave personality crumbles the second Dev opens him mouth.

And on top of that, Peri’s one day into his job and his already exhausted, spends the entirety of his debut episode worrying about what his parents will think of his career choice, and in stressful situations tends to turn towards others for help very quickly (reading Da Rules, low-key panicking a bit and looking at his parents in “Lost in Fairy World”, hiding when facing Vicky, moments like those).

There are also those moments where he either acts or sounds childish (with his voice even getting a bit higher), like when Wanda asks if he has a godkid plus him hiding behind his wand right before that, and earlier on when he didn’t want them to see him, the “my wand is missing” line and tracker line in “Lost in Fairy World” (the “sowwy” when telling them his tracker is off tho), the ending of this episode as well when he apologizes to them, also when his parents tell Jorgen that Peri did nothing wrong and he lets them take the fall, or that moment in “Operation: Birthday Takeback” when he goes “moooom” with a whine.

That’s actually something I absolutely love about those interactions, and why I find them realistic. It could have been SO easy for the writers to make Peri act like an adult all the time while his parents are the coddling cringy kind that make him look like a kid. But instead, it comes from both sides. You can clearly tell from how Cosmo and Wanda act that he’s their baby boy, but you can also see from Peri’s dialogues and actions that they are his parents. And I am so happy they took this direction!

So yeah, Peri is the most “young adult who just left the nest” ever and I absolutely adore this characterization. He’s an adult with a job and responsibilities, but he’s still young and can find himself relying on his parents or talking to them in a childish way. Such good character work!

Another thing I love about their dynamic that we see very well in “Lost in Fairy World” is just how much those three love each other. That’s something I did hear about this show, that it was a lot more fun and sweet (compared to the og which could be very cruel and cynical when it wanted), and you can really see it with those three.

With Cosmo and Wanda taking over Peri’s job, you can tell they’re not doing it out of any malice or feeling that Peri can’t do it. Heck if you pause at the scene where Peri tells Dev he can’t go to Fairy World, after he’s done talking and right before Cosmo takes another picture, you can see Cosmo and Wanda looking at Peri with the biggest smile (and it’s adorable!). And it’s the same with the rest of the episode. If anything, they’re so used to taking care of godkids that they just do it out of habit, without realizing they’re causing an issue.

Heck I’d even theorize that their behavior is partly due to their time with Timmy, hence it being a force of habit. For a long time (possibly 50 years if that one secret wish is canon), Poof/Peri was with his parents helping with Timmy, but he wouldn’t do much besides granting wishes. Poof couldn’t talk, so most of the time he’d just stand there while his parents did all of the talking. I wouldn’t be surprised if some of this was the reason why Cosmo and Wanda are straight up talking over Peri in “Lost in Fairy World”, they just got used to do so when taking care of Timmy and are now getting back into this habit.

On top of that, Cosmo and Wanda are just excited to finally be with their son again after their 10 thousand years-long vacation. Plus, when Peri does call them out, by the end of it they acknowledge their mistake and apologize, promising to back off. And while they remain cuddly towards him, from the looks of it they did stop coming in-between Peri and Dev, letting their son do his thing.

Also worth noting that, despite doting on Peri, they still very much talk to him like they would talk to an adult. Yes they hug him a lot (and I mean a lot) and call him pet names, and they were definitely excited to see him again in “Lost in Fairy World”, but other than that they clearly respect him as an adult, listening to him and trusting him. I’m not going to list examples because it’s basically every dialogue in which they don’t “baby” him. That being said I feel like “Operation: Birthday Takeback” displays it the best from what I’ve seen of it.

As for Peri’s side on this, he’s annoyed by his parents stepping in but it’s obvious he doesn’t hate them at all, quite the opposite. He just wants them to take him seriously as an adult, which is understandable. Also the fact he isn’t afraid to call them out is a very good sign. On that note, I love how when telling them his tracker is off, he actually apologizes (though he doesn’t have to, his reasoning for turning it off is understandable, and I appreciate he tells them those reasons!).

Also I live for that scene at the beginning of “Operation: Birthday Takeback” when his parents ask for a tour of the house (btw love Wanda telling him they’re ready to get him out of there if needed), they show interest in his suggestion, which makes Peri smile sheepishly. It’s such a cute moment and to me really shows Peri wanting to be seen as an adult and enjoying being seen that way by them, but also how he’s clearly attached to them! Idk it’s just a very cute moment! I love those three!

Also kind of a last minute addition before moving to Peri and Dev but looking at “Operation: Birthday Takeback”, I can’t help but laugh at how at the very beginning, the second the godkids are doing their own thing, Cosmo and Wanda throw themselves at their son. It’s very sweet. Also I love the implication that they’re here bc they’re Hazel’s godparents and need to stay with her, but also they really wanted any excuse to see their son!

And the reason why I say last minute addition is because this made me realize that Cosmo and Wanda do act pretty differently towards the godkids compared to Peri, which I find to be an interesting detail that makes their characters more complex in a way. Like yes, Cosmo and Wanda are very parental types, but to an extent you can see a line between them being with their godkids, who they are here to mentor and steer in the right direction for a few months until the kid is happy, and them being with their son, who they raised from infancy and isn’t going anywhere.

Now that’s not to say that Cosmo and Wanda don’t love their godkids, it’s obvious how much they adore those kids and care for them and probably remember each and every single one of them, but yeah you can still see a bit of a difference. At the very least, from what I’ve seen so far they can’t help but hug Peri literally everytime they have an excuse to do so, while having a bit more boundaries with Hazel.

But again, that’s a last minute thought and I’ve only seen a handful of episodes, so I might be wrong on that. Take it with a grain of salt. Still, I find it interesting to have those characters who are basically social workers and how there’s a bit of a difference between the kids they take care of for their “job” and the kid they have in their personal life. Again, that’s not to say they aren’t attached to the godkids, they are.

But yeah, all of this to say, the way the Fairywinkle-Cosma family is written in “Lost in Fairy World” honestly blew me away and really got me invested into watching this show, with “Battle of the Dimmsonian” and “Operation: Birthday Takeback” only adding to it (and I’m probably looking way too much into this and making it sound like the writing of this episode is much deeper than it actually is; I’m obsessed with this disaster (affectionate) of a family, help).

As for the part about Peri and Dev, basically there’s an element of Cosmo and Wanda talking over Peri in “Lost in Fairy World” that I wanted to explore, but then “Operation: Birthday Takeback” came out and there’s that moment in the “breakup” scene where Dev talks about his father not noticing his fairy while Peri is being hugged by his parents in the background. And while this is a visual gag, Cosmo and Wanda’s action in this scene actually fits very well thematically and made me realize something about how Dev might feel about Peri.

So now you’re getting a whole section about how Dev and Peri are a terrible match for each other, due to three main reasons:

1. The one everyone already talked about, Peri is severly underqualified. While you could say he’s been a godparent since he was a baby, back then all he did was grant wishes while his parents dealt with the talking + emotional support. Not only was he doing a small part of the job, he also had his parents, other more qualified fairies, helping him. Also the scene with Vicky tells us that Peri doesn’t have the best memories of his time as a baby, which is fair enough.

(note that I believe he was 7-8 years old when he had to say goodbye to Timmy, so he does remember him. As for Vicky, Timmy’s parents likely stopped hiring her once their son was 13-14, hence why Peri only has blurry memories of her, he would’ve been a toddler at best by then)

So yeah, Dev is Peri’s first kid, and Peri is not qualified for him. He loses his patience with the cupcakes, bites back when Dev is short and snappy with him (the classroom scene at the end of the “under//tale” episode, yeah I haven’t watched this one outside of this scene; and the beginning of “Operation: Birthday Takeback” with the flying shoes) and don’t get me started on Peri telling Dev in “Battle of the Dimmsonian” to give the staff back because “what will my parents say if my first godkid dies on me!”

Like PERI??? MAYBE DON’T SAY TO THE KID WITH ABANDONMENT ISSUES THAT YOU ONLY CARE ABOUT HIS WELLBEING BECAUSE YOU WANT TO IMPRESS YOUR PARENTS??? JUST A THOUGHT???

(note that I do believe Peri cares for Dev, it’s just that what he says here really comes off as him not caring, and since Dev is the one hearing what Peri says in that scene...)

Also obviously there’s the ending of “Operation: Birthday Takeback”. Tbh I don’t blame Peri much for this one since, again, he’s severely underqualified, but yeah his response to Dev’s wish was not the right one, which is reflected by Dev reacting with a frustrated scream which honestly made me feel bad for this kid. Peri going “as you wish” is just too distant and “professional”. That’s a kid in a vulnerable state! He needed comfort! Sure Peri had to go because Dev literally wished for it, but a more qualified fairy would have known what to say, if only something along the lines of “take all the time you need, I’ll be there for you once you feel better”.

So yeah, Dev is deeply hurting and a complete newbie who doesn’t have the patience or positivity for it was not going to make things better.

2. What I originally wanted to say about “Lost in Fairy World” before 3. showed its head: I think Cosmo and Wanda being around inadvertently makes things worse for the duo.

Thing is, Dev is a difficult kid. Because of that, I think that in order for him to open up to his fairy, said fairy needs to earn his respect so to speak. And not to say Dev’s fairy should be full on authoritative, but yeah they definitely need to be someone Dev respects and listens to, which is not the case for Peri. And I think the main reason why has to do with Peri’s relationship with his parents.

Basically, kids are smarter than we give them credit for and are observant as well. And what did Dev see his fairy do? Spend the first day on the job being terrified of meeting his parents who turned out to be incredibly sweet people. Then in “Lost in Fairy World” it honestly looks like Peri, Cosmo and Wanda just wanted to catch up and brought the kids for the heck of it, and Dev gets to see his fairy being babied by his parents, along with said parents talking over him. Then as said before there’s also Peri going “mooom” in front of Dev in “Operation: Birthday Takeback”.

And about “Lost in Fairy World”, there’s that moment in the beginning where Cosmo and Wanda tell Dev he can’t go to fairy world, only for Peri to step in and basically repeat the exact same thing as his parents (the “trial” part from Cosmo and “I can’t let you go” from Wanda). And while this line is a joke, I do think it’s important for Peri to put his foot down like that.

Because yeah, Peri is the one Dev should be listening to. It’s not just a question of “this is Peri’s job”, it’s also about Dev seeing Peri as an adult. But with Cosmo and Wanda, it’s a bit more complicated.

This is also another element I really like about this episode, Peri needing to be the one doing the talking so that Dev can take him seriously as a potential guardian.

But yeah, the thing is, it’s not working. Peri’s immaturity shines with his lack of patience for the kid, which Dev picks up on, leading the two of them to get snappy with each other on “even ground” in a way, which doesn’t help Peri’s case. And on top of that you have Cosmo and Wanda, who even with their eccentric side remain mature adults (and I love how them being eccentric doesn’t make them seem any less adult; love adults being allowed to have fun and be themselves without being shamed or called childish for it!).

Now as far as I’m aware the show never really talks about this, but I honestly wouldn’t be surprised if Cosmo and Wanda being around played a role in Dev’s perception of Peri. Not only because of them being mushy parents as previously discussed, but also because they are clearly older and more experienced than Peri, making it harder for Dev to take Peri seriously. Hopefully this makes sense?

And speaking of Dev with Cosmo and Wanda, I actually get the feeling he somewhat respects them? At least more than Peri? And on that note, there’s that scene at the very beginning of “Operation: Birthday Takeback” that I find both adorable but also pretty depressing when it comes to Dev.

When Cosmo, Wanda and Hazel show up, they ask if Dev’s dad is here, to which he mentions “Project H”. And at that Cosmo makes a comment about this project being a big surprise party, and yeah this moments gets me.

Because for a second there, Dev actually smiles. He knows that what his dad is doing has nothing to do with the party, he says so himself in response to Cosmo, but he still smiles, because he understands that Cosmo is trying to cheer him up and appreciates the effort. Idk this gets me, especially also seeing the way Wanda and Peri are looking wary as Cosmo keeps talking, clearly unsure of how Dev will react.

Like am I making a big deal out of a ten seconds moment? Probably. But there’s just something about this sad kid closing himself off whenever his problems are brought up, acting like an entitled brat most of the time as a coping mechanism, yet when this random adult he vaguely knows tries to cheer him up, he’s able to understand it and appreciate it. Idk, again, it just gets me. And sadly it really shows how bad of a match Peri and Dev are. Peri hasn’t been able to get any sort of progress with this kid, but the second his dad shows up and talks a bit suddenly the kid is giving a sincere smile. Yeah…

Now granted in regards to Dev respecting Cosmo and Wanda more, it might also have to do with them not being his godparents, considering Dev is basically using Peri as some sort of servant at times since he’s a spoiled brat and all.

Finally for this part, I want to bring up that scene in the secret lair with Vicky showing up, because to me this is a very good example of Peri actually failing Dev, which in this case will make the kid not take him seriously (on top of not earning his trust and being frustrated with him).

Now I will say, I can’t blame Peri for panicking the way he does upon seeing Vicky (btw I forgot to mention it earlier but the way he goes “lalala” and continues while turning into a drone and looking at the banging door in horror is so real. Again Peri is peak young adult energy). He’s had to deal with that woman since he was a literal infant, of course he’s going to be traumatized!

Still, Dev doesn’t know that. All he knows is that there’s this scary lady his and Hazel’s fairies know about, but he has no idea what history is between them outside of “she was terrible to our previous kid and scares us”. Also he’s 10 and has a bad home-life making him selfish, I don’t think he can fully understand the adults around him being traumatized.

But yeah, all this to say, in this scene, Peri is completely paralyzed, hiding behind the others waiting for Vicky to leave, letting his parents do the talking. And yep, we yet again go back to Cosmo and Wanda being the mature adults around here. Also worth noting that once Vicky puts on the nice act, Hazel stops being afraid of her but Dev still looks intimidated!

In that moment, Peri should have been there to protect Dev. That’s his job as a godfairy. His kid was scared and in potential danger. Yet Peri did absolutely nothing. Instead he stayed hidden, technically behind his kid which means using Dev as cover, and who came to both his and Dev’s rescue? Cosmo and Wanda, the other two fairies in the room, who are clearly more mature and are Peri’s parents.

And again, I don’t blame Peri for being paralyzed in fear like that, but how do you explain that to Dev? How do you tell that kid that he’s braver than his adult magical all-powerful fairy? That while he had to stand and somewhat confront Vicky, that adult fairy that’s supposed to protect him went hiding behind mommy and daddy? Hell from what I’ve seen, earlier in the episode the kids do stand up to Vicky, which makes Peri’s actions worse!

So yeah, hopefully this whole part makes sense as it feels a bit like a mess. The main takeaway here is that Dev needs a fairy that he can see as an almost parental figure, someone he clearly views as an adult and respects as such, that way he can have someone he can trust and be comfortable with, easing him into breaking down his walls. But Peri isn’t any of that. He’s a young adult which makes him still quite immature, and on top of that his parents basically live next door, thus leading Dev to see his fairy getting treated like a kid. It just can’t work out between them as long as they stay like that.

3. Finally, the part related to that moment of Dev talking about his dad while looking at the fairies: Dev has some serious daddy issues related to his father never paying attention to him on account of being a piece of shit who only cares about himself. And the thing is, Dev doesn’t have anyone he can relate to on that front (saying this since it’s hard for him to open up, so having someone with similar issues could be a bit of a push for him).

Hazel has caring parents whose main issue is being busy, on top of her fairies who clearly love her and spend a lot of time taking care of her. Now I haven’t seen much of the school kids but also Dev isn’t exactly close to any of them apparently? Meaning that in any case he can’t relate to them.

Then there’s this fairy that shows up, meant to cater to him but also help him emotionally, and wouldn’t you know this guy talks about wanting to impress his parents and being afraid of them! No but seriously, thinking about it, I can’t help but wonder if for a moment Dev thought he and Peri could bond over family issues, at least subconsciously. But nope! As soon as Peri reunites with his folks, turns out they’re the sweetest most loving parents ever.

I’m actually surprised that from the looks of it the show doesn’t draw a parallel between Dev and Peri on that front. I mean you have a kid with an incredibly absent parent who wants nothing more than to get his dad’s attention, being taken care of by a fairy who finds his parents’ attention suffocating and just wants them to leave him alone. There’s interesting storytelling potential here, especially when taking into account how much those two struggle to get along (basically Peri’s family situation making Dev feel worse in a way due to his confusion as to why Peri puts a bit of distance between himself and his parents)

Which loops back to that scene at the end of “Operation: Birthday Takeback” with Peri getting hugged by his parents while Dev is opening up about his daddy issues and how this visual gag fits the theme of the scene. Dev is feeling like shit about his father not loving him meanwhile the fairy that’s supposed to take care of him is being cuddled by his incredibly loving parents who adore him.

On that note, there’s an element I haven’t touched on in this episode, and it’s the fact that Hazel and Dev were in trouble with Vicky but didn’t have their fairies to protect them due to the trio visiting the house. While this scene is another example of Peri failing Dev, what I find most interesting about it is the fact that Peri “abandoned” Dev to spend time with his parents. Idk, I can’t help but think that this detail twists the knife even further for Dev. Not only was his fairy not here to protect him, but his absence is due to him hanging out with his parents who love him and wanted to spend time with him.

Speaking of which, I wonder if Dev is also angry at the fact that Cosmo and Wanda are able to take care of Hazel and be there for her whenever she needs while still finding the time to hang out with their son and be involved in his life. In a way it’s further proof that Dale is an atrocious parent, at least when taking into account Dev’s pov since I doubt a kid his age spends a lot of time hanging out with other parents, so Cosmo and Wanda are basically the only couple he can compare his father to. Basically I could see Dev noticing how much Cosmo and Wanda do and it making him feel even worse about why his dad doesn’t love him the same.

But yeah all this to say, just like everyone else in his life, Peri can’t understand Dev’s issues with his father, issues that are the core reason why he has a fairy in the first place. On top of that, Peri not only has the one thing Dev wants, but the kid sees him push it away on numerous occasions.

And that’s the end of what I wanted to say here. Hopefully this isn’t too much of a mess since I’m writing this while sick + sleep-deprived due to illness + haven’t watched much of the show past a few episodes and the clips on Tumblr.

On that note, yet again please take this post with a grain of salt, especially the Dev-Peri part. I originally just planned on gushing about “Lost in Fairy World” and how much I love the Fairywinkle-Cosma in it, but seeing the ending of “Operation: Birthday Takeback” made me want to talk a little more about Dev. That being said given how little I’ve watched there’s probably a lot I’m missing about this kid, so by no means do I think this analysis is perfect (also, the fact I’m writing this while ill…). Now Dev does seem to be a “predictable” character, hence why I feel somewhat comfortable writing this despite seeing so little, but again I might be wrong.

(Btw when I say Dev is predictable I’m in no way saying it negatively, quite the opposite! I love that him getting a fairy low-key made him worse, and I’m very curious as to how they’re going to resolve him spiraling the way he’s currently doing.)

In any case, thanks for reading!

[artisiumstudios]

Not to mention the twins will absolutely make both of them talk about their past which ford realizes midway that Stan is censoring some of his life events for the kids. Once they leave satisfied with the story ford presses Stan for answer and realizes that Stan’s life during those ten years were also life ruining. 10 years where ford at least had contact with his family (even if he sucked at it) had food and a place for sleep meanwhile Stan didn’t have that- and this all started when he was STILL a child (he also reflects on how a 17 year old is definitely not suited to face the real world) so ford didn’t just lose some argument points, he lost A LOT.

But yes I love the idea that soos and him head out to town to get some supplies and him getting mistakes for Stan. You remember that episode where stan tries to become major and one of the grocery employees throws eggs at him, same thing happens (except for is able to catch them) but he’s just VERY confused at the interaction, in fact he’s confused about a lot of things, including like you said the brands and nutritional value of a lot of food products, and also why a lot of them have a lot of harmful chemicals that are NOT suitable for human consumption. (Followed by soos grabbing said product and putting it in the cart excitedly while ford stands there horrified). Many more interactions happen like bud just glaring at ford, Susan flirting, Toby trying to interview him about putting 8 year old fake psychic Gideon in prison (what?!), and so many other things.

At first he doesn’t recognize fidds when he approaches him, he’s talking weirdly (but in a familiar way?) and when he pulls out the old laptop ford finally recognizes him. A lot of talking, explaining, and apologies happen but by the end of it they have set up a day (date?) to meet up and review some of the effects reopening the portal has caused.

After returning home, all he wants to do is just sit down with his brother and watch tv (maybe watch that show the kids have been excited about what was it? Detective goose? He’ll ask the kids later.

What if Stanley didn't make it to the portal when Ford returned in time? And what if the twins and Soos hadn't stopped the portal either?

What do you think would've happened? How would Ford react to the changed empty house? :3

[hollowflight-propaganda]

I think it's time I change my bio to say it's been 11 years since I started to watch Ninjago.....

Gosh. Where's my senior discount on the lego sets, huh?

[sskk-manifesto]

Ep 6!!!

[solace-seekers]

screaming into the void <3

[cakesexuality]

I've been disabled for almost 29 years. Here's what I've learned.

Tablets sink and capsules float. Separate out your tablets and capsules when you go to take them. Tip your head down when taking capsules and up when taking tablets. Liquigels don't matter, they kinda stay in the middle of whatever liquid is in your mouth.

If your pill tastes bad, coat it with a bit of butter or margarine. I learned this from my mom, who learned it from a pharmacist.

Being in pain every day isn't normal. Average people experience pain during exceptional moments, like when they stub their toe or jam their finger in a door, not when they sit cross-legged.

Make a medical binder. Make multiple medical binders. I have a small one that comes with me to appointments and two big ones that stay at home, one with old stuff and one with more recent stuff.

Find your icons. Some of mine include Daya Betty (drag queen with diabetes), Stef Sanjati (influencer with Waardenburg syndrome and ADHD), and Hank Green (guy with ulcerative colitis who... does a bunch of stuff). They don't have to be disabled in the same way as you. They don't even have to be real people. Put their pictures up somewhere if you want; I've been meaning to decorate my medical binders with pictures of my icons.

Take a bin, box, bag, basket, whatever and fill it with items to cope with. This can be stuff for mentally coping like colouring books or play clay or stuff for physically coping like pain medicine or physio tape.

Decorate your shit! My cane for at home has a plushie backpack clip hanging from the end of the handle and my cane for going places is covered in stickers. All of my medical binders have fun scrapbooking paper on the outside. Sometimes, I put stickers and washi tape on my inhalers and pill bottles. I used my Cricut to decorate my coping bin with quotes from my icons, like "I've seen enough of Ba Sing Se" and "I need you to be angrier with that bell".

If a flare-up is making you unable to eat or keep food down, consider going to the ER. A pharmacist once told me that since my eye flares can make me so nauseous that I cannot eat, then I need to go to the hospital when that happens.

Cola works wonders for nausea. I have mini cans of Diet Pepsi in my coping bin.

Shortbread is one of the only things I can eat when nauseous. Giant Tiger sells individually-wrapped servings of shortbread around Christmas or the British import store sells them year-round. I also keep these in my coping bin.

Unless it violates a pain contract or something, don't be afraid to go behind your doctor's back to get something they are refusing you. I got my cardiologist referral by getting in with a different NP at my primary care clinic than who I usually saw. I switched from Seroquel to Abilify by visiting a walk-in.

If you have a condition affecting your abdomen in some way (GI issues, reproductive problems, y'know) then invest in track pants that are too big. I bought some for my laparoscopy over a year ago and they've been handy for pelvic pain days, too. I've also heard loose pants are good for after colonoscopies.

Do whatever works, even if it's weird. I've sat on the floor of the Eaton Centre to take my pills. I've shoved heating pads down my front waistband to reach my uterus.

High-top Converse are good for weak ankles. I almost exclusively wear them.

You can reuse your pill bottles for stuff. I use my jumbo ones to store makeup sponges and my long skinny ones to hold a travel-size amount of Q-Tips.

Just because your diagnostics come back with nothing, it doesn't mean nothing is wrong. Maybe you were checking the wrong thing, or the diagnostic tool wasn't sensitive enough. I have bradycardia episodes even though multiple cardiac tests caught nothing. I probably have endometriosis even though my gynecologist didn't see anything.

You can bring your comfort item to appointments, and it's generally a green flag when someone talks to you about it. I brought a Squishmallow turkey (named Ulana) to my laparoscopy and they had her wearing my mask when I woke up. I brought a Build-A-Bear cat (named Blinx) to another procedure and a nurse told me that everyone in the hall on the way to the procedure room saw him and were talking about how cute he was. Both of those ended up being positive experiences and every person who talked to me about my plushies was nice to me. If you don't feel comfortable having it visible to your provider during the appointment, you can hide it in your bag and just know it's there, or if you're in a video appointment, you can hold it below frame in your lap.

Get a small bucket, fill it with stuff, and stick it in your bed (if you have room for it). I filled a bucket with Ensure, juice boxes, oatmeal bars, lotion, my rescue inhaler, etc. in October 2023 in anticipation of my laparoscopy and I still have it in my bed as of January 2025.

If your disability impacts your impulse control (e.g. ADHD, bipolar disorder), you should consider setting limits around your spending -- no more than X dollars at a time, nothing online unless it's absolutely necessary, and so on. Or, run these purchases by someone you trust before committing to them; I use my BFF groupchat to help talk sense into myself when I buy stuff.

Feel free to add on what you've learned about disability!

[lost-romantique]

The Evolution of Blitzø’s Character Growth- Stolitz (Season 2.5)

Blitz starts off "When I See Him" not wanting to think about the complexities of his and Stolas' relationship, so he decides to focus on the one thing he does know: sex.

In "When I See Him" Stolas and Blitz are meant to be never on the same page, even going as far as to have Blitz only sing-talk as opposed to Stolas' Disney-esque style of singing.

He goes out of his way, excitedly looking forward to the sex they'll have afterwards. He's only thinking about the sex.

Full Moon happens and Blitz is hurt and betrayed, as he genuinely has no idea how to process the confession.

Beginning of Apology Tour Blitz attempts to win Stolas back, only for it to end horribly as he self-sabotages the fuck out of everything he has, refusing to let go of the mask he wears.

Later on...

Blitz is heartbroken to hear Stolas sing, and his admission, "I don't think you meant to hurt me because I don't think it meant a thing at all" destroys him.

He tries to make it right with Stolas (who is drunk), apologizes to him, lets go of the mask he wears, only to end up ultimately giving up and letting Stolas go in the end.

A month passes and Blitz has essentially given up on life, driving his business to the freaking ground...

One thing is for sure, he feels a lot of regret for what happened with Stolas, and has essentially given up on being with him.

A lot of shit happens to Blitz in Ghostfuckers as the trauma that he's kept buried for fifteen years is forcefully pried open with a wrench.

Only for Millie to be the one to save Blitz in the end...

Episode ends with major character development for Blitz as his mask falls off, and he promises to butt out of the M&M relationship, and as he subtly admits and acknowledges his feelings for Stolas....

What's beautiful about the Stolitz Duet in Mastermind is that it perfectly shows Blitzø’s character growth...

How Blitz went from initially thinking only about sex in regards to his relationship with Stolas....

How Blitz was never once was on the same page with Stolas in their first duet together...

Only to now be able to perfectly harmonize with Stolas in regards to their deep feelings for one another...

Stolas admitting that he sees Blitz as his shining light that taught him to be his own person...

To Blitz admitting that he sees Stolas as the key to his heart that he's kept locked up for years...

For them to finally sing in perfect harmony as they admit their genuine undying love for each other.

And when the fear of losing Stolas permanently, hits Blitz like a motherfucking truck...

He's finally... finally able to let go of his mask around Stolas as he does what he can to comfort him after he lost everything.

Showing the small bits of romantic intimacy that he couldn't reciprocate back in Apology Tour.

Blitzø Buckzo, you make me fucking sick... how dare you be this fucking soft and cute and tender and loving. This man is fully aware that Stolas is still angry at him, but he doesn't care, he's just happy to have his birb back.

[q8qwertyuiop8p]

Something that has really bugged me about season two is Jinx's hallucinations and PTSD. It magically disappears when Silco dies, save for two scenes. I remember when people on reddit were literally making jokes about the writers going this route because it would be so stupid.

One of the things I loved about season one was the realistic depictions of mental illness that you just don't see often in media. I don't know what it is like to experience schizophrenia, but I have experienced PTSD and paranoia, and seeing how it was represented in Arcane was actually one of the things that helped me through it.

And then season 2 comes around and they just completely neglect this side of Jinx.

PTSD isn't a switch that can magically be flipped off. Recovery is a slow and gradual process. In absolutely no world would Jinx killing yet another family member cure her of her conditions, it would make them 10 times worse. Not to mention just before killing him she has an extremely severe psychotic episode, which would only make forgetting her trauma even more difficult since it was just brought up fresh in her mind.

And what even about the end of s1 was it that healed her? I genuinely have no idea, because she finally chooses Jinx only to once again go back and forth between Jinx and Powder in season two, because apparently all that buildup for her final decision was for nothing.

She does experience two hallucinations (I'm not going to count the jail silco thing in act three because what even was that?) when she sees enforcer Vi and when Sevika talks about the attack at Vander's statue, but suddenly that is all that triggers her?

In season one, just seeing Vi, or even someone who looks like Vi triggers her. But now when Vi is literally trying to capture and possibly kill her she is fine, it's only the mask that bothers her? Wasn't that her worst fear, that Silco and Sevika were right, that Vi only wanted to stop her? And she is constantly triggered by Cait in season 1 but not 2?

And then there was the insulting ending, where jail Silco tells Jinx to 'break the cycle' (something he would absolutely never do) and Jinx finally finds redemption by realizing she is purely a burden and her family would be better off believing she is dead. So she literally kills herself after Isha kills herself in what is framed as an act of heroism (and if Jinx actually didnt, than what even was the point of that scene, besides a cheap fake out?) What happened to Ekko trying to stop Jinx from doing that? What happened to Silco having Singed revive her to save her life after she attempts to take it? Or Jayce and Viktor talking each other out of it? Or Silco choosing to keep fighting rather than give in to the "peace in water"?

On purpose or not season 2 frames suicide as a glorious, edgy, perhaps even necessary thing and it's disgusting.

[lokidjarin-7567]

I Hate It Here

Kang Dae-ho x Reader After joining a mysterious game of life and death, you find solace in the company of another player, one so vibrant and optimistic it draws your mind from the horrors that await you. fem!reader, fluff, usual content warnings for Squid Game, guns, language, death etc, obvious spoilers for Squid Game season 2, mostly edited, not perfectly accurate to the episodes but close enough 5k words Part 2 of this fic is now up! Thank you for all of the love so far and I will be writing more Squid Game fics about other characters too so keep an eye out ;) TTPD Contents | General Masterlist | AO3

You hadn’t even considered that the weird guy who started shouting before the first game started would be telling the truth. That you could actually die here for money, or for entertainment, or for whatever the twisted fuckers who brought you here wanted. You figured he was just vying for attention, or trying to scare you all into backing out. Then you heard a gunshot.

After that moment, you followed every piece of advice he shouted out, satisfied he knew something you didn’t. You made it over the finish line, shocked and traumatised, thanks only to hiding behind someone a lot taller than you. You immediately collapsed on the dirt panting with exhaustion, a few tears falling from your eyes. What had you gotten yourself into?

You were relieved when Player 456 called for a vote to end the games, and even more relieved at the realisation that his number was only a little after your own. He was called to vote first, red X marking his jersey, and you followed suit just after him, lucky as Player 452 that you could get your voting over and done with quickly. He smiled at you, bowing his head slightly in acknowledgment, and you returned the favour, moving to stand beside him. You quietly celebrated with him when a player chose your side, and you watched as he tried to talk to the remaining people, explaining how he’d played before. Then you consoled him when it didn’t work. It came down to the last vote, the stress almost too much to bear, but as Player 001 was adorned in blue light from his selection, you realised you were stuck here, and you were close to crying again.

Player 456 automatically took you under his wing. There seemed to be another player that he knew, so you sat with them as you ate the provided food, dejected at the outcome, but grateful to at least have found some allies. You were trying to ask a few subtle questions about the game, but other players kept approaching your group. You shrunk back a little, avoiding the attention that came with being around the previous winner of the games, listening as people spoke of their admiration for him, and grilled him for information as to what was happening next.

You hadn’t noticed at first - a voice speaking from behind you - and honestly, you didn’t want to turn around, still feeling shy and awkward. Eventually, though, the crowd dissipated, and the source of the voice jumped down from one of the bunks. He was tall and lean, shoulder length hair pulled into a half-up half-down style, strays falling around his temples and framing his face. His smile was infectious, carrying from his lips to his eyes, which were rich brown in colour and full of joy and enthusiasm. You were transfixed by him as he introduced himself as Kang Dae-ho, quickly bonding with the man Player 456 knew thanks to their shared military history. He was the antithesis of you - so outgoing, so enthusiastic, so full of optimism. Even down to the blue circle that adorned his uniform; on most, it was a bad look, voting to continue at the risk of others, but on him, it seemed courageous.

His chattiness was as contagious as his smile, and as he joined your group to eat, you found yourself immersed in conversation with him: about the game, about the other players, about the members of your little makeshift crew. Even watching on and cheering together as Player 001 took down a few bullies in front of everyone. He was comfortable to be around. A welcome distraction that helped you forget where you were, or what you might have to do as the days passed.

And it was working. Until, after a while, the conversation lulled momentarily, and you couldn’t stop your mind from drifting to darker places. What the game might be. What it would involve. If it would ever really get as brutal as Gi-hun said it might…

You felt a gentle nudge on your arm, snapping you out of your spell at the sound of your name falling from Dae-ho’s lips.

“You good?” He muttered quietly, a hint of concern on his face. You had been talking for a few hours now, and you had done everything in your power to keep up your positive front, to pretend you were happy to be here but it was fading fast.

“Yeah, I’m just…”

“Scared?” A sigh of relief fell from your lips.

“Yeah.” He smiled softly, glancing around to see where the others were, before leaning in closer.

“Me too, honestly. Just trying not to show it…” There was a sincerity in his voice, a vulnerability that you could tell wasn’t fake. He wasn’t just saying it to make you feel better.

“Dae-ho…” you muttered, gesturing to the blue badge that signified his vote, “why did you choose to stay?” He shrugged, glancing back at the crowd of people who were starting to prepare for lights out.

“I need the money, and honestly, when I voted, I didn’t know anyone here. I figured it’s not like I’m personally killing anyone. No harm no foul, right? It’s just the way a soldier thinks, I guess. You don’t know who you’re shooting, just that they’re in the way of your victory. But now…” he paused a beat, his eyes darting over to where Jung-bae and Gi-hun were sitting, deep in conversation, before landing on you, eyes scanning your face with a curious intensity. “I’ll do everything to keep my team alive.” You couldn’t help but laugh coldly. The sentiment was sweet, sure, but there were no guarantees.

“From what Gi-hun told us, it might not be a team game. It could be something completely out of our control…”

“I’m hopeful!” He exclaimed, the optimistic, puppy-like demeanour back as he grinned at you.

“I’m glad someone is.” The intercom informed you that it was 10 minutes until lights out, and you couldn’t help but let out a shuddering breath. You weren’t looking forward to that - trying to sleep in a dark room filled with hundreds of people you didn’t know. Desperate people.

“Let’s find our beds for the night?” Dae-ho prompted, standing and offering his hand to help you up. You took it, smiling at him thankfully and glancing around for the other members of your team, palm feeling cold when his touch left it. “Look, there are two next to each other just above where Gi-hun has set his things down. We can bunk close together so you know you’re safe. I’m a light sleeper!’ His constant proactivity in making you feel safe and comfortable was warming your heart, but simultaneously causing a bout of nausea and anxiety that rose from your gut. One of you might die tomorrow in these twisted games. He would betray you in a heartbeat to keep himself alive, regardless of his sentiments. And despite that, you're already starting to trust him.

He was right though; he was a light sleeper. A few hours in and you hadn’t slept at all yet, fear clouding every corner of your mind, and the only thing soothing you was the soft purr of his snores. Eventually, you couldn’t help but sit upright, a quiet but frustrated sigh escaping your lips as your hands ran across your face and through your hair. His voice muttered your name, and you glanced over in shock to see him slowly sitting up in his bed, his tired eyes raking over you with concern.

“What’s wrong? Are you ok?” You pulled your legs to your chest, nodding at him before resting your head onto your knees.

“Can’t sleep.” You muttered as a sorry excuse of an explanation, but it seemed to convey what you really meant, his head cocked in worry.

“Can I help at all?” You opened your mouth to reply, to tell him that you'd be ok, but he continued before you had a chance. “Maybe you should try falling asleep before me. I’m going to be awake for a while now anyway, I can keep watch.” You were going to protest, to tell him to rest up and keep his energy for tomorrow, but honestly… it might help you. Just knowing he was keeping an eye out could get you a few hours of rest at least.

“…would that be ok?” You asked timidly, but he nodded with his now signature enthusiasm.

“Of course! I told you I’d protect you, I’m keeping my end of the bargain.”

“Thank you.”

“Don’t mention it. Please, just get comfortable.” Your body instinctively laid down as close to him as possible, only the bars between the bunks separating you, curling up on the small bed and settling in. You closed your eyes, exhausted beyond belief, but the moment you did, panic overtook you. It was irrational, sure, but before, when you couldn’t see him, you could hear him snoring so you knew he was still there. Now, it was dead silent. Your arm reached forwards instinctively, avoiding the metal posts to meet the soft fabric of his uniform, fingers latching on securely. You blushed at your own response to fear, grateful to the dark surrounding you, but as you felt him shuffle closer, allowing you a firmer grip, all of your nerves dissipated, your body finally giving in to exhaustion.

You woke to loud classical music and the intercom announcing that the next game will be starting shortly. You blinked your eyes open, groaning already at the aches forming in your body and the speed of your heartbeat at the thought of the horrors today might bring. But then, you felt a hand softly close around your forearm, giving a gentle squeeze of encouragement. You glanced down to see where your hand was still clasped around the edge of his T-shirt, the back of your fingers grazing the warm skin of his stomach, his own arm draped atop yours from where he lay on your side. You blushed furiously, untangling your arm from his and sitting up as casually as you could manage, rubbing the back of your neck in an attempt to hide your red cheeks.

“Hey…” he muttered sleepily, shifting to sit up too, and your body automatically turned to him, as though after just a few hours of knowing him, you were programmed to seek his voice out and follow it. “Remember what I said, ok? Stick by me today. If it’s Dalgona like Gi-hun said, pick triangle, and if not, we’ll work it out.” You couldn’t do much but nod, nerves and fear clouding your senses. You just focussed on putting one foot in front of the other, climbing out of bed and lining up with the rest of the players in the centre of the room. When the guards starting walking, you followed wordlessly until you reached the game room, the only thing keeping you from breaking down was the knowledge that Dae-ho was right behind you.

Gi-hun’s confused expression when you entered the room confirmed everything you needed to know - you wouldn’t be playing Dalgona today. However, Dae-ho’s optimism from the day before was well-placed, as the speakers announced that players should arrange themselves into teams of five. It was an easy pick. At some point during the night or morning, Gi-hun had reconciled with Player 001, and he honestly seemed like a solid addition to the team. He had physical skill - you’d seen that during the fight - and he had a seriousness about him that made you feel confident.

They announced the games, and your heart dropped. As the only girl on the team, you knew they’d ask you to play gonggi, and it just wasn’t something you’d played. As the inevitable question came, you shook your head in shame.

“I’m sorry, I never had anyone to teach it to me.” Your heart broke at the disappointment on your teammates faces.

“I can play gonggi.” Dae-ho piped up from beside you, and you breathed out in relief.

“An ex-marine playing gonggi?” You heard Jung-bae pipe up, and you couldn’t help but frown at his comment. You could immediately hear the pride drain from Dae-ho’s voice as he replied, and you glared at the older man, hoping to quietly convey your disappointment in him.

“I have four older sisters, so I played with them sometimes.” Jung-bae started to backtrack and encourage him, but you couldn’t help but think about why Dae-ho felt like he had to defend himself. It was such an endearing trait - a softer side that you valued and trusted in an ally - and yet he was explaining why it was ok to be good at a kid’s game. It made you feel sad for him. You interrupted Jung-bae’s forced sentiment slightly harshly.

“I’m good at flying stone. I used to bet the boys in my class that I could beat them and won every time.” Jung-bae looked as though he was going to say something, but Dae-ho spoke up first with a wide smile that calmed your nerves.

“Perfect! We’re lucky to have an expert with us. What about the rest of you?”

The rest of the team decided their roles quickly, Jung-bae sarcastically stating if he couldn’t play flying stone like he wanted, ddakji was his next best choice. You just shrugged. Gi-hun settled on jegi, and Player 001 seemed happy with what was left to him, so now, all you had to do was wait.

The first race was awful. It felt like a car crash you couldn’t bring yourself to look away from as the second player in their team missed in flying stone over and over and over again. Your team were discussing strategies based on how they were doing, how missing the stone eats up time as you have to fetch it, but you just felt a lump form in the back of your throat. If you failed this, all of you would die. The timer hit zero as he finally struck the stone, and you ripped your eyes away just in time, covering your ears and staring at the floor as the sound of gunshots ricocheted throughout the room. You eventually opened your eyes as the pink guards carried large gift boxes into the room that you could only assume were coffins for the dead, and turned to glance at Dae-ho in horror. He wasn't looking at his surroundings, practicing his part of the game with some small stones, but there was a noticeable shake in his hands that hadn’t been there before.

It was hours before it was your turn, and you were already exhausted before even playing. Watching everyone else, being so invested in each and every person’s survival, constantly thinking about how you could improve on their methods for their own attempt - it had taken its toll. And now, it was finally time for you to do it. You looped your arms around Jung-bae’s and Dae-ho’s, ankles already bound together, and he gave you one last smile of encouragement before you set off. You moved in accordance to Gi-hun’s shouts, reaching the ddakji station before you knew it. It only took two attempts and it flipped, the excitement of your group palpable as you continued to the next game. Your turn.

Your hands were shaking as you took the stone from the guard, almost so much that you dropped the damn thing. You tried to breathe deeply, to calm yourself down, but your mind wouldn’t stop returning to that first race, to the player who missed over and over…

Warm hands surrounded your own, snapping you out of your thoughts and grounding you. Dae-ho spoke, and you looked up at him, fear etched into your features.

“Breathe. Remember how you used to do it. You’re just on the playground winning a bet. Steady your hands, breathe, and throw.” You nodded along as he spoke, breaths returning to normal just long enough to compose yourself, crouching slightly. Like a skipping stone. As it left your hand, you cursed quietly. You were worried that it was too high, not quite the right angle, but by some miracle, it caught the top of the stone, toppling it just with the lightest touch. You could’ve cried as the Circle guard raised his hands above his head to mimic the shape on his mask, relieved that you wouldn’t be at fault if your team didn’t make it.

Dae-ho’s arm was like a vice as you made your way to the next game, his own nerves now evident. He gathered the gonggi in his hand, feeling the weight of them, and you and Player 001 leant slightly away from him to give him the space he needed. Jung-bae started to speak, throwing some generic words of encouragement his way, but you shushed him quickly. He’d told you earlier that he concentrated better when it was silent, so you intended to make sure that he had the conditions he needed. You watched as he let out a breath in preparation, then began, moving with speed and accuracy that left you in awe. As he held out his fist to the guard, and they approved, you couldn’t help but quickly wrap your arm around him, a short celebration before moving to the next section.

It took Player 001 a long time to complete the Spinning Top. You couldn’t help but flinch every time he failed, glancing up at the time in worry as he cursed himself out over and over. Gi-hun set him straight, calming him down quickly and reminding him of everything at risk, and he finally succeeded. The last portion of the race passed in a blur of seconds, Gi-hun quickly completing Jegi with the help of Player 001 before stumbling over the finish line, unexpected tears falling from your eyes in relief. You had actually made it, all of you had…

Gunshots rung out in the room, and you screamed, instinctively ducking down, your hands flying to your ears. It wasn’t until your heartbeat returned to normal and the guards started to unlock your ankle restraints that you realised Dae-ho had wrapped himself around you, one arm pulling your face into his chest, your head nestled tightly in his hand and folding the rest of himself around you. You tried to move, legs now free, but he wasn’t budging. You could feel his heart hammering against his chest, breaths shaky as they fanned against your neck. You pulled your hands from your ears, pressing them to his chest and gently easing him back to standing. That seemed to snap him back to reality a little, but he looked confused, still shaking.

“Hey, Dae-ho…” you muttered, and his eyes finally settled on you, looking like a deer caught in headlights, “it’s ok, they didn’t shoot us. We’re alive, we’re ok…” You could almost see the cogs turning in his mind as you said that, the confusion and fear slowly giving way to relief, breaths steadying as his eyes frantically scanned your body for signs of injury.

“We’re ok?” He whispered, and you nodded.

“We’re all good. Nobody got hurt. We did it.” He nodded, the gravity of what you said finally hitting him. He smiled, but his eyes still looked far away, like he wasn’t quite grounded yet. “Let’s go back to the dorms, yeah? Then vote to get the fuck out of here.” He just nodded again, and you led him from the room, following the rest of your team, who kept glancing back at him with a concerned expression.

By the time you got back to the main room, though, he was back to his usual enthusiastic self, excitedly discussing voting plans with the rest of your team, and encouraging everyone on their prowess in their individual games. Despite your victory, it seemed that you all wanted to leave, happy with the money as it was and wanting a fresh start outside of this hell. But as the voting commenced, it didn’t take long for the O side of the tally to tick up, and by the time you and Gi-hun got to vote - the last out of everybody - it didn’t matter. The circles had already won.

Dinner was a silent affair: Gi-hun, Player 001 and yourself eating quietly while Dae-ho kept guiltily glancing to where Jung-bae had extradited himself, his traitorous blue badge burning your eyes as though it was a bright neon sign. Eventually, he stood, pulling the older man almost by the scruff of his neck over to where the rest of you were and having a quiet, frustrated conversation with him. You sighed as Dae-ho dragged him to stand in front of you all, looking at you expectantly as Jung-bae just looked sheepish. You sighed. No point losing an ally over something you couldn’t change now.

“It’s not like you voting to leave would have changed a whole lot, we were outvoted by more than one person…” The subsequent onslaught of thanks almost made you want to take it back, but the joy and pride in Dae-ho’s face made it worth it.

While you pretty much knew each other’s names already, he decided this would be a good time for everyone to introduce themselves properly, starting with himself. He explainied that his name meant ‘big tiger’, and it made you giggle. It was fitting - a hard and brutal exterior when needed, but ultimately a softy beneath it all. You heard everyone else’s, finally learning that Player 001 was called Young-il, just like his number, but when it got to you, you had to explain that you weren’t sure what your name meant.

“We could always give it a meaning,” Gi-hun piped up, and you laughed.

“Like what?”

“Maybe… good at throwing.” You laughed again as his face crumpled in shame at his own attempt, the others chiming in to better him.

“Loud snorer!” Jung-bae exclaimed, earning an offended ‘hey’ thrown in his direction.

“Good teammate?” Young-il said, and Gi-hun scoffed.

“That one’s just lazy! What about pretty hair?”

“You don’t name someone after their hair!”

“Kind angel.” Dae-ho said proudly, and you honestly felt close to tears as everyone else stopped bickering to agree with him. You smiled thankfully as his eyes met your’s, laced with warmth and care. Maybe it would all be ok if you stayed a little longer.

"Ok, big tiger, kind angel it is."

“When we survive the next game and finally get to leave this place…” You had been talking for well over an hour now, and you had given up correcting his ‘when’ statements to ‘if’. His optimism was so sweet it hurt your teeth, but if it helped him cope with being in here, then they could rot for all you cared. “What do you want to do?”

“Well, I want to pay off my debt first…”

“Obviously.” He said with a laugh. “I mean fun stuff.” You smiled sadly, staring at your shoes.

“Honestly? I’ve been in survival mode for so long now I haven’t thought about fun stuff since I was young.” You paused a beat, glancing back up at him. “Sorry, I didn’t mean to bum you out.” He just shrugged.

“That’s ok, I know what you mean. But you should. Think of something fun, I mean. Might help you get through this.” You couldn’t fault his logic, but it took you a minute before you could remember anything.

“When I was a kid, I read about the Bahamas being a magical place where there were black and pink sand beaches, and that you could swim with pigs in the sea there… it sounded so peaceful and picturesque. I think I’d like to visit one day.”

“That sounds amazing…” he replied, wistfully looking at the ceiling. You were keeping watch together, your team peacefully sleeping under the beds behind you, and the silence their absence left seemed to be goading you to keep talking.

“We could go together. A few weeks, no stress, just sunbathing and swimming and…” It had slipped out before you could stop it, and you could feel the sentiment bouncing around the room, loud and weighty. There was a charged moment of silence, his eyes drifting from the ceiling to you, scanning your face for signs of insincerity. He wouldn’t find any.

“That would be perfect.” You smiled in relief, but it was short lived, both of you whipping your heads to the door frantically as you heard a knocking echo in the dark space. You found the source of the noise quickly though - Players 120 and 149 requesting to use the bathroom. You watched the scene play out quietly, smiling at the older woman’s dramatic display as they were finally let through by the guards, and the space fell into a stifling silence once again.

“What are you going to do when you get out of here?”

“We.” He corrected you quickly, and you blushed.

“Fine, when we get out of here.” He paused, fiddling with the collar of his jacket and pulling it up to cover the lower half of his face, fingers twirling the zip as he pulled his knees to his chest.

“I want to take you to see my hometown. My family still live there, and I know my sisters would love you. They could even teach you gonggi too, if you wanted.” A tear fell to your cheek, the tenderness of it all hitting you quickly. “Maybe buy a little place there and one in Seoul, so I can visit them as much as I want. Spend weekends by the water there. Not as exciting as the Bahamas, granted…” You rested your head on his shoulder, blinking back the tears and swallowing hard to clear the emotion from your voice. It didn’t work.

“That would be perfect.”

It scared you how much you trusted him so quickly. It hadn’t even been two days and you found yourself daydreaming of a future with him. A future where you didn’t have to do shit like this for money. A future where you both found good jobs, earning enough to keep you comfortable. A future where you could start over with the help of the money you earned here. A future worth living for. You’d always been sceptical, but maybe trauma bonding was a real thing after all.

“Dae-ho?” A sleepy voice behind you muttered, and you both turned to see Gi-hun shuffling out from beneath the one of the beds. You had all decided to make doubles when you were setting up earlier with the bunks that were already next to each other, sliding two mattresses together and having a buddy to make it safer, Jung-bae opting to sleep alone in shame. Young-il followed him out, yawning dramatically and rubbing his eyes. “You guys have been up for a long time, let us swap out for a while.”

“Are you sure?” You asked, but Young-il yawning had set you off, following suit even though you tried to suppress it. They just gave you that look dads use instead of saying ‘I told you so’. “Yeah, yeah, ok fair enough.”

Dae-ho shuffled in first, and you followed. It was cramped, sure, but there was just enough room for you to sleep on your side or turn over, so you didn’t feel claustrophobic. As you made your way in, you realised how dark it was, evidenced by the fact you only found where Dae-ho was when you bumped into him, your arm pressing into his. A few moments passed and you stayed like that, finding comfort in the warmth he provided you with, and the soft sound of his breathing. Then you felt it. One of his fingers delicately tracing a line up the back of your hand. Your breath hitched, then evened out as the patterns he drew soothed you, and you couldn’t stop your head from lulling towards him to rest on his shoulder once more. Wordlessly, he withdrew his arm from beside yours and slid it underneath your neck, his hand falling to your shoulder, gently pulling you closer without being forceful. You allowed him to move you however he wanted, following his guidance and twisting until you were on your side, letting your leg drape over his and your hand fall to his chest. Your head ended up nestled into his neck as his arm kept tightening around you, hand eventually resting on your waist. You settled further into him with a contented sigh, his other hand meeting yours and enveloping it, the warmth and comfort alongside the rise and fall of his chest almost sending you straight to sleep.

It was a few minutes before you heard him speak, and even then you couldn’t be sure it was real. You were so close to drifting off, and his voice was barely audible, lips ghosting across your scalp.

“Promise me…” he whispered, quiet and vulnerable, “that we’ll make it out of here?” He sounded so broken. You lifted your entwined hands to your lips, pressing a soft kiss to his knuckles that you hoped conveyed reassurance before tucking your joined hands close to your body.

“I promise.” His own lips found themselves on your forehead, the lightness of the touch leaving your skin tingling and a content blush fanning across your cheeks. His hands squeezed yours tighter as exhaustion began to pull you under, and all you could think was how badly you’d fucked yourself over. That even if you somehow made it out of this place, if it was without him, it would feel worthless.

"Goodnight, kind angel."

-> part 2