#this is what I come home from work to
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HE'S SO SICK FOR THIS!!!!!
#THIS IS WHAT I COME HOME FROM WORK TO#6.30PM ON A FUCKING TUESDAY#I WAS JUST CHILLING MINDING MY DAMN BUSINESS AND BAM#woozi#ljh#seventeen#svt
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Learning to celebrate the little wins!
#fersona#While I don't have the capacity to do Hourly Comics Day#I did journal my day hour-by-hour and the sheer difference in my self-care and routines is *staggering*.#Honestly both Feb 1 2024 and 2025 were rough days...but this year I had a far better outlook on it all.#The funny part is that when I drew this a few days ago I actually *was* celebrating not crying.#Might have still cried on Feb 1st. A meagre 4 times. But I also had lot of good moments!#January is a very hard month for me and frankly I've been in a fugue state for most of it.#Drawing helped me pull through these last 2 years but this year I've been finding myself so upset at how I can't seem to focus anymore.#So updates and posts have been slow. I'm just slow. I'm tired and burnt out from work and grieving.#But you know what? The days I do manage to post; I'm never shamed for how long it took. You're all just as excited and kind.#I'm coming home and eating better and sleeping more and spending time with loved ones.#This is all to say; you can be a lot happier when you realize that life can be taken a little slower.#I'm more grateful that words can possibly convey.#If you related to the mindset of constantly feeling like you've 'failed' the day; please know you have done more than you realize.#I'm struggling with it everyday! I'm in the trenches with you!#Life is too short and painful to not celebrate what you *do* accomplish! It's hard work but it is worth it!#Bit by bit...we will learn to live. *Really* live. And enjoy it!
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May your hardened heart be woken By the soft and distant song Of all you left here unspoken All the shards we keep stepping on - Take this body home Take this body home Call the wind, and let her know Take this life outgrown Take this broken soul Call the stars, call them all And take it high, take it far, take it home
#svsss#luo binghe#shen qingqiu#bingqiu#sqq#lbh#scum villain#heard the song Take This Body Home by Rose Betts and it nearly took me out at the knees#it really really suits sqq's self-detonation in hua yue city right? i'm not the only one feeling this?#considered adding some literal shards for them to be stepping on - since sqq's sword explodes - but i couldn't quite make it work#anyway this has been playing like a music video in my head for the past couple days highly recommend listening to the song#if you haven't heard it before#can't get over the absolute dissonance between how sqq views this scene and how everyone else must feel about it#like to him he's just completing his plan - hopefully keeping lbh from destroying a city with energy imbalance and escaping The Plot#nbd! he and sqh have planned it all out it's FINE :) off he goes!#meanwhile everyone who loves him - including lbh who worked years to get back to him and is trying to work through a lot of grief#and resentment and doubt and longing and... - watches him DIE in FRONT OF THEM#just collapse while coughing up blood sword disintegrating energy completely consumed#like holy hell sqq could you traumatize the people around you any more???#no wonder lbh went a little bit crazy after that like my man was already not in a great place but what the fuck#lbh watches his shizun presumably sacrifice himself for him ONCE AGAIN like after he's finally Gotten Strong his shizun is STILL#coming to harm in an effort to make up for his shortcomings#my art#most of the time out here drawing what amounts to muppets and then sometimes i get the urge for this and just need to cover everyone in blo
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The idea that uni protesters are "elitist ivy-league rich kids larping as revolutionaries" on Twitter and Reddit and even here is so fucking funny to me if you actually know anything about the student bodies at these unis. Take it from someone who's going to one of the biggest private unis in the US, 80% of the peers I know are either from the suburbs or an apartment somewhere in America, children of immigrants, or here on a student visa. I've heard about one-percenter students, but I've never met one in person. Like, don't get me wrong, the institution as a whole is still very privileged and white. I've talked with friends and classmates about feeling weird or dissonant being here and coming from such a different background. But in my art program, I see BIPOC, disabled, queer, lower-income students and faculty trying to deconstruct and tear that down and make space every day. So to take a cursory glance at a crowd of student protesters in coalitions that are led by BIPOC & 1st/2nd-gen immigrant students and HQ'd in ethnic housings and student organizations and say, "ah. children of the elite." Get real.
#also idk how to tell you this but even if it were true. wealthy children potentially sacrificing their educational careers to protest is#a good thing actually. idk how to tell you that caring about people from other nations is good#personal#“this war has nothing to do with most students cuz nobody's getting drafted” idk how to explain to you that we should be angry#that our tuitions of 10s of thousands of dollars that we pay every year for an education is being used to fund a genocidal campaign#also the implication that if you go to a uni institution you are automatically privileged by participation no matter your bg#i didn't /want/ to go to this school. i was supposed to go to a school with an art/animation program. but i realized my immigrant#parents have been working their whole lives to get me here. and turning the opportunity down would be a disservice to their sacrifice#this is getting into convos of “what 2nd gen kids owe their parents” which is different for everyone but. yeah#i just get pissed off at seeing people misrepresenting student bodies as “wealthy” and “privileged” and “elite” when it's such a blatant li#i remember a year ago a friend told me they can't fly home to hong kong for winter break because the plane tickets are too expensive#so they have to find temporary housing around the area#last quarter for a film doc class my film partner made a doc on a small group of marxist grad students from india discussing praxis#during a rally a few months ago in response to police presence the coalition invited palestinian students to speak about their experiences#and lead songs and read poems they wrote. these are STUDENTS. are they elitist too?#this is not to disregard my own personal privilege either.#this whole narrative's just to rationalize a lack of empathy to me. seeing a 19yo student get shot by a rubber bullet and your first#reaction is “HAW! HAW! bet richy rich didn't see THAT coming when she put on her terrorist hood!”#newsflash. these big uni campuses are HAUNTED by the violence of past protests and revolutions and police brutality. we know.#why do you think these coalitions have been making reinforced barricades at record speed
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Lil doodle requested by a lovely person:
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#the vees#vox#vox hazbin hotel#hazbin hotel#staticmoth#valentino hazbin hotel#vox the tv demon#hazbin valentino#vox fanart#voxval#hazbin vox#yesterday I was a bit stuck so I asked If anyone had some doodle requests and a lot of cool nice people answered#you all can also send doodle requests also here from the ask box obviously#i didn't finish all the prompts i received#because i needed to sleep and work#planning#to continue to do them after i come back home later#also later I will enter a church for the first time in like six year#and the church is literally behind my current house#is a funeral so i don't know what to expect#will they sing?#do people sing in churches?#i need to do some research for sure#anyway#have a nice day everyone!!!#i will publish all the doodles obviously#sloooowly#or not!#SUPER QUICKLY#or at a normal speed
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You know what? You know what I think?
I think that if we lived as we were meant to, in larger intimate ("extended family") groups and with more shared labor and time to do it (UBI NOW) people like me would not feel so useless and burdensome because there would be people around to help and to do what neurodivergent people can't while making valuable space for the neurodivergent to do what they ARE good at.
The way we live right now, all right, the way we live right now forces units of two adults to be able to do EVERYTHING or PAY to have someone come do it for them. I have to do the housework. I have to do it! But I am having to do a million different things and most of them I am not good at. I suck at them.
I wouldn't feel like shit, okay, if I had more than one other person around who was not a child and who could do the things I can't, like do the yard and cook and do repairs and basic maintenance; and someone else to split everything else that I like but is too much for me. It would free me to do what I am good at and enjoy. Cleaning, as in the sink and toilet, the windows, the blinds. Taking out trash. Folding, hanging, and sorting laundry.
But because all the shit I can do often relies on other shit being done first, and I can't do or have trouble doing those things, the shit I can do often can't be done. And even the shit I can do, I can't do ALL of it. So I can't keep up, and things get very bad.
We aren't meant to live like this. We are not meant to live like this.
That thought hurts so much because being able to flee the birth family is integral to survival for so many people. I'm so afraid that living in larger family groups would create more opportunities for, say, queer kids to be isolated, rejected, bullied, and abused. But if we gave people enough money to survive, and stopped considering children the property of their parents with no system in place to help them escape bad situations except a system that is often just as bad, just different.
I'm aware that communes and collectives aren't all that successful and are kind of a joke. I don't mean that. I mean a fundamental shift to multigenerational families where taking in "strays" (which my family did) is also normalized so people escaping abuse into existing households was accepted, with these families centered in maybe a couple of different larger residences so not everyone has to buy and maintain their own fucking washing machine and vacuum cleaner, and so people can benefit from large group meals that yield leftovers, and so child and elder care can also be centralized.
Then disabled people and the neurodivergent and sick and injured people, and pregnant people, and grieving people, would not have to either labor through all those stressors or consign themselves to living off an unlivable pittance or being put under legal guardianship.
I'm not saying anything new. People live like this in other parts of the world and maybe it sucks and I am wrong. But I'm just really mad right now because I can either do laundry or clean the sink but not both, and I really think we could improve society somewhat by making it so I did not have to choose one without sacrificing the other.
#im feverish feeling (not a real fever just malaise that i have no other way to describe) from the IBS (which can affect you like that#)#and i don't actually want to do ANYTHING#i would have to even living with others but it would be easier#at the very least i wouldn't have had to clean the microwave earlier which is hard because my arms are like the size of a meerkat's#and i can only reach the back with my fingertips#where is my BF in all this?#WORKING FULL TIME WITH BACK PAIN#yes i AM going to want him to have to do as little as possible when he comes home#he's neurodivergent too and struggles with the same shit#it's all a mess#we are doing way better i didn't realize how deep a drain three very sick cats were#but there's still only two of us#if you are disabled physically OR MENTALLY you should at least get in-home household help once a week or so#there's places that do that but the limitations are usually severe and always rule me out#because im not single im not an elder im not a veteran and im not physically disabled#if we have to ration that sort of thing i can see how on the whole it is more caring to allocate those resources to for example elders#but the fact that i celebrate what help there is doesn't mean i don't get mad that more people can't access it#is2g if i was functional enough snd physically sound enough i would start a charity that did intervention cleaning for people like us#who have fallen behind and can't catch up but can MAINTAIN#and who helped people clean for a few months during and after an illness pregnancy trauma major loss etc. so they could stay on their feet
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okay unironically I love so much that porter is like this world SUCKS its BAD here and it HURTS you why do you care abt it!!! and literally every single bad kid is like ngl we just hate ur ass it does not matter what ur philosophy is
#dimension 20#fantasy high junior year#not art#fhjy spoilers#its!!! gods I will Be My Ass in the tags rn. but thats so like. deliciously setting typical#like porter's desire is to transcend and his contempt for the world he's in feels. idk Real#like he plays the game bc he wants to win and be done with it. how do I word this#yknow. being a god would like. be his win state. when he gets that happening thats it his story is done he checks out#meanwhile the bad kids do actually just like playing the game lmao. like they love adventuring!#theyre so solidly Of This World. they carry the values that can only be born of it and they like having mastery over it#its a meta angle that I think is very fun specifically for d20 being in such a unique position in the zeitgeist when it first started#the rat grinders are from DnD Writ Large. porter wants to escape. but this is the bad kids' home its Their Actual Play Show#which makes it so fucking excellent to me that porter's question is somewhat of merit! its their show and it tries very hard to punish them#and they just straight up dont listen to him here lmao bc they hate him but! since the moment the academic track ended its been clear#that they save the world bc they Like Playing. With Each Others#thats what riz thinks the core of adventuring is! thats why fig stayed! and I also think thats why this hovers over elmville now and#a dead god is coming back in the school gym. porter is a shit evangelist but even if hes a good one I dont think it wouldve worked like he#wants it to. the only way he couldve escaped is if he'd not involved elmville at all. thats where the bad kids met dude#its a shitty place that fucks with them but they all come back here bc they wanna play with each others#and in that regard I think thats what the stress tokens ultimately means. Is This Game Still Fun To Play. ITS A RAGEQUIT LIMIT#Im literally running from one end to another of this conspiracy board Ive pulled out of nowhere#Ill draw after this I just wanna get this out. gods this episode has done nothing but furthering my delusion of grandeur actually#Im the hottest smartest manthing on earth Im king fucking midas over here. anyways uh! great ep!
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-Okay but some of the fears that Color has are in fact the same fears that Nightmare has when it comes to Killer.
Like, Color is worried that Killer's so blindly loyal to Nightmare for whatever reason that he wouldn't even think of complaining if he hated it. And at the start that was something Nightmare probably expected. His henchmen should be loyal and obedient and not ask questions nor complain. But now, after years of learning and bonding and softening up significantly he wonders sometimes if that's still the case.
Nightmare knows Killer well, perhaps better than most, but he's not exactly an open book. Especially when it comes to his own wants or needs. More often than not when he makes a request it's intentionally silly or unreasonable for laughs, like asking if they can take Dust to the nearest pet store and try to trade him in. Very rarely does he want something strong enough to make it known, both to himself and others, like asking to keep the first cat he found.
So.
If he hated this. If he truly struggled and fought and agonised with himself about the position he's in and the work he's doing and the life he leads.
Would he say it? Would he realise that was how he felt? Would he even consider saying no was an option?
If Nightmare asked him to do something he really genuinely did not want to, would he just do it anyway because he doesn't believe he has a choice in the matter?
The only way of finding out (besides making a blatantly difficult request of him, which Nightmare is not willing to do) is to simply wait and trust that Killer will tell him if something is wrong. Which... is not exactly foolproof or easy.
But it's part of why Nightmare hates to be around Color too much, because deep down he's more than a little worried that Color could be right and he doesn't know how to fix it.
#UTDR#UTMV#Dadmare#This was a thought I had and drafted like months and months ago and forgot about#Little ideas about how to fit Color into a dadmare scenario I guess#Cool people who make Color posts don't look I'm probably doing a terrible job with your boy lol#He's not worried about the others in regards to this because Dust has never had a problem disobeying him#And Horror and Cross set out ground rules for themselves right from the start about what they would not do (murder)#He's never sure about Killer though. how do you begin to tell someone they don't have to listen to you if they don't want to#How do you tell if it worked?#Realistically Killer has and does disobey Nightmare he just hides it well#''I got caught out and ganged up on during that fight'' when really he peeled off to go talk to Color out of sight#''they must have heard we were coming. there was nothing we could do'' when one of them got distracted and they fucked up a job#''we've always had that cat. they're just shy so you don't see them very much'' when he brought home another stray in his jacket#<-That one happens a lot and Nightmare is beginning to suspect on it#But he never sees more than like 4 or 5 of them at a time so he can't prove anything#Whether it's sheer luck or Killer has trained his cats to do a Parent Trap bit on him nobody knows for sure#Anyway this has cooked for long enough time to release it into the wild#Go my post
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ugh. whatever. i deleted that post. i don't want to dwell on one negative when there's so much positive that I am genuinely so touched by. i don't think most people would ever need to be reminded of this - but will say it anyways - pls just remember I am a human being and not a chapter-churning machine and all writers, fic writers and otherwise, (honestly artists in general) should be allowed to explore what they would like to, even if its not to your taste or expectations <3
#i will not make coming home 2 electric bugalloo#there's a lot i dont like about my own work and a lot id to differently about coming home#but even so i i respect it enough to end it#will do little one shots when the time is right but yeah#tldr someone made a tiktok that showed up on my fyp that heavily implied i should just make more stuff like coming home#and that the new fic is something we can 'predend i didnt publish'#which again if you dont like it thats cool but john from lost voice dont tell me what i can't do !!!
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Note for someone to turn into a story: one way to give the middle generation/s on a generation ship a purpose in life, aside from "raise the children whose children will eventually land on the colony world," could be as creators of art and story. Music too.
Just imagine: you have your whole life ahead of you with all the training and materials of this vast spaceship at your disposal, and all of society plans to revere the creative masterpieces you and your peers come up with.
No pressure.
But yes possibility.
#somebody write about that#I haven't heard this story before#generation ships#they always feel like such a depressing concept#because nobody ever plans anything for the middle generations to DO#but what if they were the Shakespeares#the Rennaissance artists#the ones able to create a vast body of work over their lifespans#the best of which would become required reading in schools#for centuries to come#it wouldn't be hard to arrange#a few regular contests for quality#a good system for recording and preserving#and the leadership makes the best readily available to society#bingo bango you've got some new classics#to go along with the old ones from humanity's original home world#wouldn't that be something#writing prompts#in spaaace
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I have this small, deeply personal headcanon that after his grandmother's passing, Alhaitham's home was so unbearably quiet that he started--just barely, just one or two words--to speak out loud to her as if she was still there.
"I've been accepted to the Akademiya, Grandmother."
"I passed my promotion exams."
"I debated with Haravatat's sage."
Just that, and quiet again.
But one day, it's: "I met someone strange."
"He keeps showing up when I'm trying to study."
"We don't agree on anything. Still..."
"I made a friend."
"Today, Kaveh and I were researching--"
"It's already dark. I didn't realize we spent so long in Razan Garden. Kaveh wanted to hear about my article--"
"He's going to be furious when I tell him the whole point for his portion of the lecture is based on a false predicate--"
The house where his grandmother used to be gets a little louder again; the noise lasts a little longer.
Until one day, when there's no words at all.
One day, when there's just the sound of a single sob, and then a long, long silence.
#genshin impact#alhaitham#kaveh#haikaveh#kavetham#sometimes you wanna laugh#and sometimes you wanna think about things that make you ache inside#Alhaitham is a miracle of a man#because if my ONLY friend told me they regretted ever befriending me in the first place#I don't know if I'd be able to come back from that one#okay okay but enough of the angst; hear me out#here's the second half of the headcanon#Alhaitham comes home from work#their house is eerily quiet#normally Kaveh's humming to himself while he cleans#cursing his clients and his own high standards in equal measure#or banging away on his prototypes#with Mehrak beeping along for moral support#but today there's just a quiet murmur from the library#Alhaitham looks in#Kaveh is at the desk#he's fiddling with the small portrait of Alhaitham's grandmother#the one Alhaitham packed away when he moved into the home they were awarded together#and in the quiet#Kaveh is saying “Well the resemblance might be uncanny but you look like a warmer sort.”#“I can tell you wouldn't tease me for forgetting Khwarizmi's third principle.”#“Would you believe what your own grandson says sometimes--he actually claimed--”#and if--muffled against the door sill--there's the barest hiccup#that sounds like a single little sob dipped gold in joy#well no one will ever hear it but Alhaitham anyway
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I hate hate HATE when people say I'm "having an attitude" with them, bc I'm literally not until AFTER they say that. And thats not even "an attitude", it's me being annoyed and frustrated bc youre saying im having an attitude when im NOT.
Like what does that even mean. I'm just autistic.
#blah blah blah#vent#like i was just responding to my name being called???? i literally just went “huh?” which i do all the time?????#and when you walk off mumbling shit that i cant hear bc we're dozens of feet away from each other in a loud ass store#and i come over and ask what you wanted#and youre like “i said we'll talk when you drop the attitude” or whatever and have the audacity to smirk at me like its a joke and i have#any idea wtf youre talking about#like i got so frustrated and upset about it that i legit cried for like an hour after that. while still doing my work bc i just wanna get#done and go home.#this is about one of my managers btw. if it wasn't obvious#like shes cool most of the time. but she says shit sometimes that make me wanna quit on the fucking spot
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kris the worldd
#deltarune#kris#my art#sorryyyyu i didnt upload for so long again.. ive been rly busy w work and school and just have no energy when i come home..#anyways 1st pic is referenced from a pic of haechan for one of the recent songs that came out.. cant remember what the song is for the life#of me though#blood#eye strain
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i love how ciri just walked into stygga castle like “🫵😡 YOU BETTER LET MY MOMMY GO!!!!!!!!” and vilgefortz was, predictably, like “😗🤚 that ain’t happenin. to the laboratory !”
#lady of the lake has so many plot contrivances#geralt finding out the location of sty… i mean… rhys rhun… from the pipes underneath zubàrran#yennefer being imprisoned so she was kept out of commission until the final final act#because otherwise she would be too powerful#ciri basically just turning herself in after skipping through literally universes and universes in her escape#but you know. at least for ciri it does work#because she could have gone travelling forever. but she goes to france and remembers her mom and has to come home#expected teenager girl with a healthy relationship with her mom behavior. i love her and yen#geralt: i’m a parent so my child can have what i didn’t 😌🤚 … a mom#the elbow-high diaries#book: lady of the lake#c: ciri#c: vilgefortz#the witcher books#lady of the lake spoilers
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MORE DAD AANG, because it just keeps me going.
I have come to the conclusion in my head that airbenders literally have had to had the most angelic voices, they are the best singers by far compared to any nation and they don’t even have to try, it just comes with the territory. If an airbender decides to practice singing they can become even better, if they practice enough they can even use airbending to sing, which would allow them to do literally magic with their voices. So from this we can infer is that naturally Aang has to be a hell of a singer, even so he would much rather just stick with dancing (I have dancing headcanons for all the nations BTW). However when bumi is born and is about a few months old this baby can’t fall asleep, there is some nights that by some miracle he would fall asleep at his bedtime and sleep through the night, but he would wake up at four am BAWLING. On a normal night bumi just doesn’t stop crying and katara is absolutely exhausted she just came from one of the most stressing days in the clinics and she just can’t deal with bumi at the moment. Aang notices and tells katara to get some rest and that he will deal with bumi by himself, some time passes and bumi just doesn’t stop, there are moments where he calms down to then start crying his eyes out again, Aang has done absolutely everything, he is constantly carrying bumi around, he is giving him food, he is hugging and kissing bumi, he is talking to him, nothing seems to work. By this point aang has become numb to the cry’s and honestly at this point he is very tired and just decides to sit down with bumi in his arms and wait it out, I mean he eventually HAS to fall asleep, right? Well Aang gets pretty bored about just sitting down and hearing Bumi cry so he begins to hum to himself, he hummed this song he had heard an orchestra play at a work dinner. Unexpectedly baby bumi calms down a little when he hears aang hum, as Aang notices he begins to hum a little louder and notices bumi calmed down completely. He continues shocked when he sees bumi even begin to get sleepy, when he runs out of the melody he begins to sing songs that were sung to him at the temples when he was a little boy. To this bumi finally falls asleep.
Don’t cancel me pls.
#atla#avatar aang#avatar the last airbender#bumi ii#good dad aang#mom katara#katara#kataang#working mom katara#Aang usually gets home earlier than her#even tho they usually both come home pretty late#they are busy people i guess#katara has single-handedly build or bettered most clinics around the nations in my head#she is iconic that’s why it should have been said in lok#cloud babies#baby bumi#air nomads#air nation#airbenders#airbenders sing#and they sing like if they were coming down from heaven#air nomad culture#wait i regret what i said katara has bettered orbuilt ALL clinics and hospitals around the four nations#headcanons#atla headcanons
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Thinks about my next series again... I drew the icon for it!
I'm planning to have it launched within a year! I'm hoping for summer 2025. I want to make a prelaunch page before Time and Time Again ends so people can subscribe if they're interested, but I'm worried the series return would be too early...
#SORRY HAHAHA REPOSTING IMMEDIATELY#i. it. IM SORRY okay the.#i had 'im not interested in the comic' as an option but it immediately made me feel bad#DONT FEEL BAD IF YOU PICKED IT i put it there#i just realized its not really a helpful metric to me at all!#im making the comic either way!#so i just want to gague interest. disinterest doesnt do much for me. you can come and go as you please!#just wanting to retain readers as much as possible but without losing them due to taking too long#ahhhh the balance of marketing. a beautiful beast she is.#anyways yeah hoping to launch like about as tta is ending#or like at LEAST a prelaunch page by then#im also not intending for the prelaunch page to be like. announced...#moreso just a link i append on art for the series!#just so when a drawing of zagan gets 500 notes#people who are interested in what hes from can. see that...#anyways. sorry i haven't been posting work is wild im going 70+ hours a week again i am so tired#not much time to draw non work stuff#im hanging on by a thread of having multiple projects i can bounce between again#and sometimes thats this one! so heres the results of some mental health work variety#we were legion#polls#sorry for the instant repost. in my defense. i am exhausted.#i can not wait until im making a different comic that i can do a fucking. normal ass schedule with#where im not every week gasping for breath in some kind of bad at swimming metaphor.#anyways if youre not interested dont tell me. it doesnt matter to me. no offense but i just dont wanna hear it.#i want to make the comic and my audience as much as i love you all is not going to have any control over what i do with my art#im gonna make this comic if i only get it done on weekends after getting home from the fuckin movie theater#i am not working for webtoon again wnd im not forcing myself into the dirt for comics again#but im also never gonna stop making them. just need to build a healthier relationship!#FUCK I MADE IT A ONE DAY POLL.
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