#this is the cringiest thing i drew in a while | Explore Tumblr posts and blogs

catxsnow · 4 years ago

Text

DRAW ME D.W.

Summary: Damian never knew his drawings could lead to something so great. Older!Damian

Warning: the cringiest reference but I couldn’t help it, fluff

A/N: I’ll say it once and I’ll say it again, Damian’s skills are not showcased enough

Gif not mine

Word Count: 2.3k

Everyone knew how amazing of an artist Damian Wayne is.

He would sketch whenever there was a pencil and paper in front of him no matter if he was supposed to be paying attention to something or not. He loved to draw, to paint, it was the easiest way for him to express himself since words and actions didn't come out as easily to him.

Damian would draw anything and everything. He drew his dog, batman, even the gargoyles that he would perch beside in the dark of night. Drawing was his escape and not to brag about it, but he was pretty damn good at it too. Bruce was always impressed by his son's skills.

He began to challenge himself more - drawing things that were more realistic. He had nearly perfect Titus and was almost there with his father. However, when it came to drawing you? Damian had dozens of sketches of you, each one not coming near to how perfect you really were.

You and Damian had been friends since he stepped foot in Gotham - at least you considered him a friend for that long. You met him at school, first day of class and bumped right into him. Damian yelled at you - calling you dumb names for being so careless. Lucky for him, you were on a good day.

Rather than some snarky response that surely would have gotten you a one way ticket to the principals office, you smiled at him. Damian was taken aback by your response, he wasn't used to this kindness. You had apologized to him, asking if you could make it up to him by buying him lunch that day.

For some godforsaken reason, he agreed.

The two of you had been best friends ever since. It had been years since that day, the two of you were older now - fresh out of high school and awaiting university that fall. You planned to spend as many hot summer days with Damian was you could. He did just the same.

Over the years that the two of you had been friends, Damian had gained these... feelings, for you. At first, he was unsure of what they meant but after a talk with his brother, Dick, he had confirmed them. Damian had a crush on you, and for the first time in his life, he was scared of something.

He didn't want to tell you that after all these years, he had fallen in love with you. There was no way that he was willing to risk your friendship, you were his closest friend besides Jon. Besides, with him being Robin, it was way to dangerous for you to be involved anymore in his life. It was easier for him without you knowing his secret.

So, he kept his feelings hidden. He hid his blush every time you would touch him or kiss his cheek. He hid his desire to hold you in his arms. He hid his endless drawings of you, each one trying to perfect the happiness that was in your eyes.

"Whatcha drawing?" It wasn't very often that someone could sneak up on Damian - rare, in fact. However, he was so engrossed on his sketchbook that he didn't even hear you walk into his room. Damian nearly jumped out of his chair at the warmth of your breath against his cheek.

You rested your chin on his shoulder and wrapped your arms around his upper body from behind. Damian wanted to lean back into your touch, he wanted to turn his head just enough that your lips would touch. Instead, he stayed still, twirling his pencil between his fingers.

"My mother," Damian responded. He had the upper half of Talia drawn and was just starting on the details of her lower body. It was excellent work so far, especially being from memory. It was rare to ever see him talk about his mother, you never really asked about her in case it was a sensitive topic.

"She's beautiful," you commented. Damian nodded his head. He set his pencil down on his desk as you pulled away from him. "I was wondering if you wanted to go to the art show with me this afternoon. They have some new pieces I've been dying to look at and you're the only one that's going to appreciate them."

"I'd love to," Damian agreed to your plans.

"Perfect, you didn't really have a choice," You grinned. "Now get dressed, it starts in less than an hour and I want to be the first ones there."

"Get dressed?" Damian raised an eyebrow. You chuckled and looked him up and down once before meeting his eyes again. He looked down at himself, just to realize that this whole time he had been in nothing but his boxers. A blush crept up his neck - he hadn't left his room all morning and had completely forgotten to put on clothes.

"I think you some how got more fit since the last time I've seen you half naked." You didn't think that it was possible for that to happen, but here you were. Damian was in impeccable shape, and you never could understand why. He never did it to impress woman and he wasn't narcissistic enough. Either way, you didn't complain about the view.

"I'll meet you down stairs," Damian avoided your compliment.

"I think I like the view too much to leave," you leaned against the doorway. Damian stood in the middle of his room, obviously feeling uncomfortable under your gazing eyes. After all this time, he still wasn't used to your flirting. You did it a lot, which had made him realize his feelings for you even more. It also made him a hell of a lot more confused about how you felt about him.

"(Y/N)."

"Okay, short-stack," you finally agreed. Upon first meeting Damian, you had been much taller than him. Now, he towered over you after a massive growth spurt. He hated the nickname even more than he did when you were in fact taller.

"I'm taller than you now!"

Damian had never felt his heart flutter more than he did at that art show.

You looked so effortlessly beautiful as you admired the paintings. The way your eyes lit up as you talked about a certain piece to him made his breath catch in his throat. He didn't even care about looking at the art, he was too distracted by you the whole time. You were the only art he ever needed to admire.

The whole time you nearly dragged Damian around by his hand. You wanted to see everything, to appreciate ever stroke of the paintbrush. It was incredible just how talented these people were. You never acknowledged art until meeting Damian, he had been the one to get you into the history of it all.

By the time that you left the show, you were nearly skipping down the street with excitement. The most beautiful smile wouldn't leave your face. Damian wanted to see you like this all the time. He wanted you to be happy and never to be tainted by the darkness that was in his life.

Damian had offered for you to join him back at his home. You agreed, of course. The number of hours in the day couldn't compare to the hours you wished to spend with him. Damian was the one person that you didn't think you could ever get tired of seeing. You just hoped that he felt the same way.

It was raining as you came back to his home. The short walk from the car to his front door had left you both soaked to the bone. You hair stuck to your skin and your clothes were nearly see through. It was pouring out, but that was nothing new for Gotham.

Damian offered you a set of his clothes, which you happily accepted. He left the room while you could change into his sweats and hoodie. They smelt like him - an intoxicating scent that always lingered on your body from being with him so much.

A cold gust from his window sent a chill down your spine. You closed his window and wrapped your arms around yourself in hopes to warm up.

The sketch book that he had been using that morning was still opened. However, instead of the drawing that he was doing of his mother, it was on a page of you. It was incredible how he had perfected this drawing of you. From every flaw on your face, to the mixed colors in your eyes. He had done an excellent job.

You carefully grabbed the book from his desk, flipping through the pages of everything that he had done in the past several weeks. Damian was never particularity excited to show you his work, but he didn't hide it from you either. As you turned the pages, you realized just how many times he had drawn you.

They were beautiful. Damian had come back into his room, assuming that you were dressed. His eyes immediately went to the book in your hand and his eyes widened. The last thing that he needed was for you to think of him as a creep for drawing you without your knowledge.

"Dames, this is incredible," you gawked at his work. "Like holy shit, this looks like you just took a picture of me, of everything in here! Why have you never showed me these before, I love them."

"You do?" Damian asked. He didn't realize how much your praise of his work would mean to him until hearing it.

"Yes!" You exclaimed. The smile that Damian loved grew and grew on your cheeks. You sat down on his bed, gesturing for him to sit next to you as you went through each page of the book. You complimented each of his drawings and expressed how good of an artist he was.

It wasn't until you reached one of the more recent drawings of yourself did you pause. You could feel Damian tense next to you as you stopped on the page. He had forgotten the drawing. It was of you - just like every other one in this book - however, around it were dozens of tiny little hearts. The corner of the page read 'my beloved' in the most beautiful calligraphy you had seen.

He had drawn it on a day that he found particularly difficult to hide his feelings for you. Drawing it out had been the only reason he hadn't blurted it out.

"I love this one," your finger tips outlined one of the larger hearts on the page. Damian let out a breath of air that he didn't realize he was holding. You looked up at him, trying to figure out what was going through his head in that moment. He was always a closed book and as much as you had gotten used to it, he still frustrated you.

"I love you," Damian blurted out. His eyes widened at his words and you could see the panic growing on his face. He didn't mean to say it out loud - it wasn't like him to just admit how he was feeling. "Fuck, I didn-"

You didn't let him finish whatever kind of bullshit excuse that he was going to come up with. No, Damian Wayne was a once in a life time kind of person and there was no way that you were going to let him talk himself out of whatever the hell was thinking. So, you did the first thing that came to mind.

You grabbed Damian by the collar of his jacket and pulled him in so you could kiss him. You kissed him with more passion than you ever had for art, with more love than you could have for yourself, and with more confidence than you had ever given off. You kissed him like you had been waiting for this moment since the first time you saw him.

It took Damian nearly too long to pull himself out of his shock and kiss you back. His hands went up to the side of your face with more tenderness than he thought he ever had. This was the kiss that he had been waiting for, for years. Just as he had imagined it, it was perfect - just like you.

"I love you, too, Damian," you confessed. It had been just under a year since you realized your feelings for him. The yearning for him never went away until the second your lips touched. "Fuck, do I love you."

"I should have shown you those drawings earlier," Damian chuckled. He brought you in for another kiss. Without pulling away, you set the book down on his desk once more so you could crawl up his bed. Damian didn't miss a beat and hovered over you. His legs trapped you below him and his arms caging you in even more.

You threaded your fingers through his hair, tugging right at the roots to elicit a quiet groan from him. Damian trailed wet kisses down your neck as his hands slid up the sides of your shirt. He pulled it over your head, and took in even more of your beauty.

"I think I've got a new drawing project for you," You offered, playing with the hem of his shirt. You had just seen him without it that morning but the small taste of it wasn't enough. You needed more, you needed him. A coy grin threatened your smile as you continued your plan for him.

"Draw me like one of your french girls."

#damian wayne #damian wayne imagine #damian wayne oneshot #damian wayne x reader #older!damian #dc imagine #dc one shot #dc #batfam imagine #batfam one shot #batfam #fluff

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warm-starlight · 4 years ago

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Hello eve i know that you're trying to move on from aot but just hear me out pls cause i have no one else to talk to about this🥲 i know that you actually liked the original ending but one of the things that really bugged me about it was how easily annie and riener were forgiven i mean sure they saved the world but the rumbling was happening outside of paradis they never paid their dues to the people of paradis then how were they accepted as peace ambassadors? They did nothing for paradis

Hello, i have no insights to share with you really. None of the things you are upset about really bothered me, but your oppinion and feelings are also perfectly valid. That said, i think people (including me) took this series not for what it is and way too seriously. In the end the things people thought was foreshadowing something meant nothing. We can accept being wrong about it and move on.

I accepted that in the end i don't understand SnK completely, or maybe there is nothing to understand really. Maybe Isayama just wanted to write a cool "horror story" that has no message just like "the mist".

That said, i personally don't think Reiner and Annie were "forgiven too quickly". The main point about Jean, Connie, Hange and Armin is that they let go of their hatred. Besides, they had a previous bond with RA so for them it was easier. It's not like Paradis forgave them. Isayama never showed us how their lives ended so you can headcanon they were all just executed as traitors if you want.

Zeke's actions i interpreted as a sort of coping mechanism. He distanced himself from his victims completely and it looked like he enjoyed killing them. We also have to take into account that he felt as if he was saving them and their children that would be born from the world of suffering, so it's no wonder he showed no sadness over their deaths.

As for Eren, i guess i don't mind the "everything is predestined" part. It seems like the guy who wanted freedom most, had none of it at all.

I think to me the cringiest part was the whole Mikasa Ymir situation and the whole romance twist. In the end he portrayed Mikasa as being able to "get over her love" by killing him and setting an example for Ymir, freeing her from shackles of love. Ok that's fine... Flash forward and lo and behold... The only thing he focuses on is Mikasa still being bound to Eren, visiting his grave, placing symbols of love on it year after year after year until her death. She does not look happy, her face is obscured from us and her face does not look happy even when she is lying in her burial site with that damn scarf (that was a symbol of an engagement ring) on her neck... So basicaly while Ymir took her killling Eren as an ultimate move of setting yourself free for Mikasa she did what Eren Asked her to (when he told her he is in the mouth) and didn't really Choose it herself. In the end she is still bound to Eren until death.

I am sure hardcore EM shippers will love it, like "Look! Look! She got married with kids but she never forgot her one true love 🥺🥺🥺" , but for me it's just disgusting portrayal.

Paradis being destroyed years later also sends a gross message that the Yegerists were Actually right. Eren should have finnished the rumbling and wiped out the Entire outside world instead of leaving it to exist. Of course people will say "we have no idea why Paradis got destroyed, ot could be that there was a civil war!". Sure, we can interpret it, you know why? Because Yams did Not explain a Thing about this new war. He just drew the panel and said Nothing about it.

However, the fact that that city was leveled to the ground and never rebuilt shows us that the intention was to wipe them all out. I suppose this is the "Jurassic park" ending where the dino island is completely destroyed, but in the end it is implied some of the dinosaurs survived, which is portrayed with the kid in a weird post apocalyptic gear and a new Titan tree.

The implication that the titan powers may resurface again is the Worst for me. It really renders the entire story pointless and the message is "Why even try if things will turn out the same".

They had 100 years of peace inside the walls. They should have just lived it in peace and died when the time came. Why struggle and throw your life away if you are gonna die anyway and Paradis will still get wiped out in another 100 years?

This is the nihilistic message that i hate the most.

In the end i could take nothing positive from this story.

In the end he wrapped it up without answering a single question and raising more.

Sure, Yams said for him the best stories are the ones who tremendously hurt him, but is it really good when you remember a series just as a tremendously disappointing peace of work?

That's not really the kind of sad endings i like.

Anyway, i rambled on too much!

What i wanted to say is, just let go of the series and move on. In the end it wasn't what all of us thought it was. It's ok, it happens. :)

Thanks for the ask!

#snk #aot #anonymous

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crttvset · 3 years ago

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hiii (is predictable) hiyoko n leon for the ask meme?

OK HI i barely ever think abt these characters (except for the occasional like. hiyoko thought) but ill try my best

hiyoko;

Sexuality Headcanon: no idea i think she’s mspec thoguh. xe tend to experience more tertiary attraction than romantic nd sexual attraction

Gender Headcanon: GOD she is so full of gender. genderqueer transmasc she/xe/him and more neos

A ship I have with said character: i dont know actually

A BROTP I have with said character: her and mahiru and um. uhhh yuta and kotoko

A NOTP I have with said character: literally all of xyr classmates. ESPECIALLY mahiru that is his SISTER figure

A random headcanon: had a deviantart and draws shitty scenecore stuff on mspaint. he also drew a picture of her oc beating up kokichis oc

General Opinion over said character: the cringiest 13 year old like ever

leon

Sexuality Headcanon: bisexual. but in a fuckboy way. also aromantic in some sort of way

Gender Headcanon: trans guy. it is important to note that his beard thing is glued on (like soos from gravity falls)

A ship I have with said character: JUNKEON because he is pathetic and is being carried around like the chihuahua in legally blonde. and him and makoto because idk

A BROTP I have with said character: mondo???? i guess????

A NOTP I have with said character: HIM AND CHIHIRO because shes always cis :/ and leosaya unless its portrayed in a VERY VERY specific way

A random headcanon: was into hockey for a while for some reason

General Opinion over said character: hes just some guy. just some random dude

#sillyboy.txt #asks #moodorbs

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haosvteen · 4 years ago

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Betcha | lee chan

a/n: i drew a little bit of inspiration for this from ‘betcha’ by baekhyun, so that explains the title!! this is one of my favorite things i’ve written in a long time :) i hope you like it!! <3

college!chan x female!reader

~ - fluff

word count: 2.8k

masterlist

A warm burst of air greets you as you swing open the door of the stone building, looking down at your watch to see how much time was left before your class started. Since there were five minutes until your professor would begin rambling on about motifs in classic literature, you decided to walk down the hall a bit to grab a drink from the vending machine. Your shoes squeaked on the glossy tile floor due to the freshly melting snow you obtained on your walk from your apartment, causing a few students leaning against the walls waiting for their classes to look up at you. Ignoring their looks, you approach the vending machine and swipe your card. Prepared to make a selection, you hear loud laughter coming down the hall on your right.

Turning your head, you’re met with the image of a group of rambunctious boys joking down the hallway towards you. They were laughing and shouting so loudly that everyone in the building probably heard them. In the center of it all was Lee Chan. Gosh, the way all of his friends were doting over him and hanging onto his every word was enough to make you scoff and shift your focus back onto what drink you’d be choosing from the vending machine.

You heard several girls whispering to each other saying things like “What I’d do for Lee Chan to just look at me” and “One time he held the door for me at the library, I haven’t stopped thinking about it since”. Hearing them talk like that made you physically ill. He’s just a person, a human being...and he isn’t that special anyway. You’ll admit that he’s attractive, you’d be lying if you said anything other than that. He also is quite intelligent, always earning A’s on his essays in the class you share. But his personality is just...yuck. The way he never pays attention in class, constantly on his phone texting whatever girl he is baiting that week with no reprimand from the professor. The constant offers from all girls on campus to perform every task and errand for him. The general lack of care for anyone, but himself...he’s not really your favorite individual on campus to say the least.

Not to mention the way he always tries to one-up you in class. You’ll proudly own up to the fact that you’re a good student, amazing even. You pay attention, never miss a class, and raise your hand almost always to answer any question the professor throws your way. But every time, Chan just has to go and say the exact same answer as you, just in a better way. Of course, causing him to receive all the praise from your professor and earning an adoring gaze from the girls in the class. There are no words to describe how much this infuriates you. Especially the cocky smirk he throws your way after the professor says, “Great answer, Chan, I couldn’t have said it better myself!”.

As the frustration due to your thoughts grew, you were ripped away as someone leaned up against the vending machine, mere inches from where you were standing. Speak of the devil.

“Hey, Y/N, ready for class today?” Chan asks you, with that same cocky smirk on his face that you’ve, unfortunately, grown so used to seeing. As if the sight of his lips raising is a trigger for you, a fire starts deep within you, annoyance, and frustration growing every second you’re in his presence. Rolling your eyes, you ignore him and raise your hand to press the button on the machine and finally make your selection. Before you had the chance for your finger to collide with the plastic, Chan beat you to it and pressed the glowing white button for mint tea.

Speechless, you simply scoffed and looked at him with wide eyes, not believing he just did that. Who does that?! “Take it easy, babe. Don’t act so offended, you know you were going to get mint tea anyway. You get it almost every day before class,” Chan says casually, leaning his head back against the machine, chewing the gum in his mouth with a smile.

As much as you hate to admit it to yourself, he was right. You were going to get the mint tea, it’s your favorite...and it’s a little weird that he knew that. Just to spite him, you respond, “Actually, I was going to get strawberry milk today, but I guess I’ll have to settle for this instead since you took it upon yourself to decide for me”. The annoyance in your voice was evident, but if Chan noticed, he didn’t let it show on his face. He leans down and grabs the bottle of tea out of the machine, not breaking eye contact with you the whole time. The tension could be cut with a knife and you knew his group of friends standing several feet away and the group of girls gawking at you both could feel it as well.

Standing up, he extends the bottle towards you saying, “Then let me make it up to you then” with yet another cocky smirk, paired his eyes trailing your body up and down. Your face twists into a look that says ‘That was the cringiest thing I’ve ever heard, also I am incredibly grossed out’.

“Uh, no thanks,” you say, grabbing the mint tea from his hand and walking down the hallway, hearing his friends teasing him by saying, “Oooo” and no doubt giving him joking punches on the shoulder.

Your mind was a scrambled mess from the interaction you just had. Who does he think he is? Does he think every girl on this campus is begging for his attention?! In all honesty, you wish he would just ignore you so you wouldn’t have to deal with his antics and casual flirtation. It infuriates you to no end and quite honestly keeps you up at night thinking about how he believes he runs this campus.

Making your way into the classroom, you quickly slide into your unassigned-assigned seat in the front row, trying to pull out your notebook and pen all while attempting to organize your thoughts and irritation about whatever that conversation was you just had. You let out a large sigh as you flip to the next open page in your notebook and the professor begins class, giving you a scolding look for the huff of air you let out to express your exasperation. As you begin to jot down some general notes about what the prof is saying, you notice he who must not be named enters the classroom.

“Oh, Chan! I’m glad you could make it,” your professor cheerily says as Chan saunters in.

“Wouldn’t miss it,” Chan responds, flashing a bright smile. This causes yet another heavy breath to leave you as you shake your head at your professor’s naivety and how simple it is for him to be charmed. You realize Chan is making his way over to pass you in order to find his own seat. Looking down at your notebook to continue taking writing and ignoring the close proximity of your least favorite person, you notice something is slid onto your desk as he walks by.

Strawberry milk.

You couldn’t help the blush that crept up your face. You quickly grab it, tossing it into your backpack, hoping no one saw. Confusion and shock flood your head as you simply stare at the board in front of you. What was his goal with that? Probably another one of his flirtation tactics, no doubt. Did that actually work on other girls?! The bar is so low, apparently. You turn around to hopefully catch Chan’s gaze and give him a confused and weirded out expression, but when you turn around he’s simply leaned back in his chair, listening to the professor, seemingly bored out of his mind. You know he knows you’re looking at him and is just refusing to meet your eyes. Narrowing your eyes at him, you whip your head back around to focus on the lecture. There is no way you were going to let Lee Chan of all people distract you.

As the class was drawing to a close, your professor announced, “I’m trying something new for the final this semester. Instead of taking an exam, as students have done in the past, I’m going to be placing you into groups to complete a presentation”. He was met with groans from students like you who would just prefer to study on their own and get it over with by taking a test, but there were also silent celebrations from students who think that a group project means less work for them. However, only one thought was racing through your mind:

Do not put me with Lee Chan.

“I will go ahead and read off who your partners are, then you will be dismissed. The directions for this assignment will be posted on our class website later tonight and we’ll discuss it more next time we meet. Well, I won’t keep you waiting”, he explains and begins to read off the names. It’s embarrassing to admit but you were literally hiding your hands in your sleeves and crossing your fingers that you wouldn’t be paired with Chan. It might seem dramatic and a drastic measure to take. He can’t be that bad, right? Wrong. You’d heard rumors about his poor work ethic in group projects. That combined with his overall playboy aura is not a good match for you.

“Lee Chan and Y/N Y/L/N,” your professor says. It’s like your mind is frozen. Of course, this would happen to you. Just your luck. You didn’t even pay attention to the final words your professor had to say before wrapping up class because you were dreading having to do an entire project all by yourself.

As you closed your notebook and began to pack away your things, you felt someone standing near you. With a sigh, you look up knowing exactly who it is.

There he was, standing with his hands in his jean pockets and that cocky smirk making yet another appearance. Rolling your eyes, you sling your backpack over your shoulder and stand up, grabbing your phone.

“What’s your number?” you bluntly ask, not so much as a question and more of a demand.

“Oh, how the tables have turned,” Chan says with a laugh, grabbing your phone to enter his number in. His fingertips grazed your hand as he gently took it from your grasp. You’d never admit that it made your heart skip a beat or two, though.

He finishes typing in his number and as he is handing your phone back, he suggests, “Let’s get lunch or something to talk about the project”. You started walking away from him halfway through his sentence, causing him to trail off at the end.

“No,” you call out as you walk out of the classroom. “I’ll text you.”

Not going to lie, you kind of felt like a badass. Chan deserved a taste of his own medicine and you’re just the lucky person who gets to give it to him.

You make your way to a local coffee shop a little way down the road, mentally preparing to deal with customers and make beverages until the late hours of the night. Entering the backroom to set your things down and tie your apron on, making your way out to behind the counter to begin your workday.

The hours dragged on and on, filled with heating up pastries and making cappuccinos until it was 10:30pm and there were only thirty minutes left until close. There were a few people in the shop, working on their laptops, or having a chat with a friend. It was around this time of night, you started to clean up behind the counter and prepare everything for those who open the store the next morning.

You bent down to grab a square bucket from under the counter and a damp rag, heading over to clear off several tables from customers who had recently left. As you’re placing some plates into the bucket, you hear the doorbell jingle, signaling that someone has entered.

“One moment, I’ll be with you in-” you begin, but look up to see Chan. You suck in a sharp breath of air as he walks toward you with that damn smirk on his face. You continue to gather the dishes from the table, hoping that maybe he would just go wait by the register. Wishful thinking on your part as he comes over puts a hand on the table, leaning on it and tilting his head to get a better look at you.

“What do you want, Chan?” you monotonously say, not drifting your attention from clearing the table.

“Well, I tried texting you, but you didn’t respond,” he explains.

“Uh, yeah because I’m working,” you respond matter-of-factly. You finish wiping down the table and lift up the bucket to go over to the next table. Chan takes the bucket from your hands and you look at him with the most confused expression, but he just motions for you to go on to the next table. You shake your head in more confusion, but accept it and go on with him trailing behind you, hauling the heavy bucket of dishes.

“Yeah, that’s why I came here,” he continues the conversation as he sets the bucket down on the next table. You stop cleaning and look at him with yet another confused expression. How does he even know you work here? He must have been able to tell what you were thinking by the look on your face because he says, “I like coming here and I see you here, so”.

No matter how weirded out or confused you were, you carried on, “Why did you even need to talk to me in the first place?”

“Oh, I already have our presentation outlined and in a PowerPoint. We just have to do some research and put it all together,” he casually says. You don’t know who said that he has a poor work ethic in group projects, but apparently, they were wrong.

“Thanks,” you respond simply and head back behind the counter, with Chan following you yet again.

“We’re meeting on Thursday at 4:00 to finish it,” he says as he lifts the glass cake stand and grabs a blueberry muffin, starting to dig in.

Rolling your eyes, you reply, “Thursday doesn’t work for me. I also hope you’re planning on playing for that”.

“Oh, no, I figured it was on the house,” he sarcastically teases. You give him a stern gaze and he continues, “Of course I’m going to pay for it, I don’t want to get you in trouble or anything”. You don’t know why, but that made you kind of...blush. And you hoped he didn’t see.

“Anyway, why can’t you do Thursday?” he casually says, still picking chunks off of the muffin and eating them.

“I have plans, Chan. News flash: the world doesn’t revolve around you,” you retort as you begin to clean the coffee machines.

“Yeah, yeah, it’s your world, I’m just living in it,” he says as if it didn’t mean anything. What did it mean? It’s not like people just say that casually. At least you’ve never heard people say that about people casually. You barely had any time to think more about it when you heard him say a little quieter, “Do you have a date or something on Thursday?”

Your heart began to race...and what for?? Was he...jealous? Why would he be asking if you had a date? Why would he care? “No, I don’t have a date,” you respond. At that, you see Chan’s head perk up.

“Okay, well how about Wednesday, then? I could do like...5:00?” he says.

“Yeah, that works,” you reply, looking towards him and giving him a small smile. A facial expression you never thought you’d be giving Lee Chan. There was just something about the way his eyes lit up...and that damn smirk…

“Alright, then,” he says while reaching into his pocket and pulling out a bill, placing it on the counter to pay for the muffin he took. Making his way to the front of the shop to exit, he turned around to say, “It’s a date”.

And there you are, left a blushing mess behind the counter. Waiting for Wednesday at 5:00.

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scribeofmorpheus · 6 years ago

Text

Miss Midnight (Steve Harrington x Vampire!Reader)

For the SPOOKTOBER 2018 Competition

Requested by @electroma89 : This is my Halloween themed request! I was thinking on a Steve Harrington x vampire!reader with prompts 118 and 155. Reader was trying to hide being a vampire (only dates at night, "I'm not really hungry", etc.) from Steve but he discovers her on Halloween night.

MasterList

Words: 4072

Warnings: Fluff and pining?? Sadly, despite the raunchy gif its quite tame!

A/N: Okay, turns out, for all my bashing of the mishandling of the vampire genre in YA books I’ve read, I am, in fact, equally terrible at writing for a vampire character. So I humbly offer this weird fic as penance for all the years I’ve spent shit-talking YA Vamp Books! Prompts in Bold-Italics. I tweaked one of the prompts btw!

Songs: Monster Mash and Spooky Movies

The night was young. You had decided to venture out into town -being bored and hungry were your two life staples at this point. First, you would hunt, the woods in Hawkins were surprisingly well stocked with adequate prey when there were no derelicts loitering about in dark alleys. Once sated, you would find something to chase the boredom away, maybe go to the arcade if it was still open.

While strolling through town, most of the shops were closed except for one, the local diner. You weren't hungry, not anymore and certainly not for human food, but you were bored and there was obviously going to be a jukebox or an arcade game stashed in the corner somewhere. You had a few quarters to spare so you walked over. In the window, a sign read: "NIGHT Shift Staff Needed @ Hawkins Movie Drive-Thru"

You laughed at how much emphasis was put into the word 'Night'.

When you walked through the diner's doors, your appearance no doubt drew the attention of the few strangling locals sipping down iced cokes and eating cherry pie. You could smell everything in the diner. From the sugary sweet strawberry shakes being prepared behind the island to the musky leather of the Greaser sat in the back, devouring a meaty cheeseburger. It was overwhelming and a little strange. This was one of the reasons you tried to avoid humans. Unless it was Halloween. Then you loved being around oblivious mortals and their unexplainable fascination with the things that went bump in the night.

You grinned, finding subtle irony in the fact most of the people were judging you based on your proclivity for wearing leather, studs and biker boots, and not the fact you actually were one of those creatures that went bump in the night!

You ordered a vanilla shake as an excuse to seem like you belonged, walked over to the Jukebox and played Spooky Movies before moving onto the arcade game plugged into the wall in a dark corner.

While you wracked up quite the high score, your keen senses picked up a new scent. You turned to see who it was. A young man of average stature, impeccable hair and a swoon worthy smile walked in. His hair damp from the rain that you hadn't realised had begun to pour. He racked a hand through his long-ish hair and walked over to the counter with a goofy smile, shrugging off his soaked letterman jacket.

"I'll have the usual!" He smiled and placed a few coins on the counter. Something about him intrigued you. Maybe it was his smile, maybe it was the sound of his voice… or maybe you just found that face of his a little too dashing. You took a slow slurp of your shake, forgetting that you hated its hefty dairy consistency. Your nose crinkled and you made a disgusted sound from all the cold sugar sliding down your gullet. When you put your shake down, you laughed at your own silliness and noticed that the handsome boy from the other end of the island was looking at you with an interested gaze. Feeling a bit cheeky, you winked at him before turning back to your game, finally breaking the high score.

When you sauntered out of the diner like someone who had just slain a dragon, you made sure to give the handsome boy one more cheeky wink before giggling mischievously as you walked into the pouring rain -doing a little dance to the song that was now firmly stuck in your head. Your ears picked up the low chuckle of the boy from inside the diner.

Two Weeks Later

"Would you like butter or salted popcorn with your corndog?" you asked the movie-going dates in front of you. Your eyes drooping and voice lifeless from boredom. The two dates eyed you unpleasantly.

"N-no popcorn, just--" He looked around the confection booth, "A bag of gummy worms." He pulled out his wallet.

When they got their order, you heard his date whisper in his ear when she thought you were out of earshot, "Jeez, would it kill her to smile a little?" When she turned around to look at you, you turned on the cringiest grin you could manage to pull, your vampire fangs fully extended. She gasped in shock and then rolled her eyes, "Jesus, I'll never understand people who wear Halloween costumes before Halloween!"

You laughed. As more and more people parked their cars into the Drive-Thru, you began to fill space by eavesdropping on all the dates that seemed to be going poorly. Strictly for entertainment purposes, of course.

In a blue Cadillac, an older married couple sat silently, the tension between them almost palpable.

"I still can't believe you, Mark!" The wife whisper shouted with a livid expression. The man sighed, "I swear I didn't mean to do it. It just happened so quickly. I--"

The wide held up a single finger and took a slow breath.

"Ooh, an affair?" You guessed allowed.

"You knocked my Father out of his fishing boat!" The wife said with a serious face.

You placed your hand on your mouth to withhold your snort of laughter.

"I told you fishing wouldn't be a good idea, honey!" The husband protested.

"He can't swim!"

"Then why does he have a fishing boat?"

The couple folded their arms and stared at the screen right as a particularly gory scene played out.

You turned your gaze to another couple, younger and not as tense. The young blond sat in the front waved giddily at her troupe of spunky friends who were pretending not to be spying on her and her date. You could just about make out the smell of her lip-gloss: cherry-red.

"So," Her date spoke, his voice familiar. "When I asked you on a date, I didn't actually think I'd be taking all five of your friends out too." He laughed nervously.

"What?" She asked confused. Her date pointed at the throng of girls sat on a stack of hey. Her eyes went wide from embarrassment. "Yeah… Well, you can just pretend to not see them."

"Right..." He said sheepishly, looking at the group of girls staring at him and his date. "Easy."

"Awkward," you commented.

"So, what do you do?"

"I uh, work at Scoops Ahoy," he said.

"You work at the mall?" She asked while twirling a strand of hair. Her expression was visibly disappointed. "I don't get it. Aren't your parents like… rich or something?"

"My parents, yeah." He said flatly. After a beat of silence, he asked: "So… you're a senior?"

The blond nodded enthusiastically, "Soon to be Prom Queen with a 3.8GPA and bound for Penn State! What about you? Future plans?"

"I- Uh… I'm taking life as it comes." He said.

"Ooh, Little Miss Perfect does not like that answer," you giggled.

"So…you aren't in college, you work at the mall… What do you do with your free time?" She asked, not at all thrilled by any of her date’s answers so far.

"I babysit. Mostly."

"Babysit?"

"Oooh, she really didn't like that answer!" You rested your chin on your hands, watching with eager eyes unapologetically.

He nodded. He drummed his fingers against his steering wheel then he turned to his date, visibly claustrophobic and asked: "Want any snacks?" His date nodded a little too enthusiastically and he was all too happy to comply, he practically threw himself out of his car and jogged to the concession stand.

When the familiar boy got to the stand, his face lit up with recognition. A smirk on his lips. "Miss Midnight." He said absentmindedly.

You cocked your head to the side playfully, "I'll be honest, most people just ask for a coke and a box of goobers." You teased. He blushed.

"The high score, at the diner. It's you, isn't it?"

You leaned in close, "Don't tell anyone. I have a reputation to keep."

"As what?"

"The town introvert and resident trouble maker," you smirked. "Trouble in paradise?" You wiggled your eyebrows to the sight of his date pouting with her arms folded around her chest.

He shuffled awkwardly from one foot to the next, "Yeah, you could say that. I think she's just having her first disappointing date." He said in a low voice.

"Hey, don't worry about Little Miss Perfect. Something tells me she'll get over it. Besides, if you asked me, you're the lucky one. She seems like the kinda girl who would draft up a twenty-year life plan after a successful first date!"

He found some comfort in your words, "I think you're right! I'm Harrington. Err, Steve. Steve Harrington's the full name and apparently, I can't stop making an ass of myself tonight." His words fumbled as his cheeks reddened. You found it cute.

"It's nice to finally put a name to the face, Harrington, Steve. The name's Y/N." You said smoothly.

Steve rubbed his neck shyly, "Right. I guess I’ll see you around." He began back towards his car.

"Hey, Harrington, Steve!" You shouted. He looked back with a curious expression. You tossed him two cans of Coke, one after another. He looked at you with an arched eyebrow.

"Don't wanna go back to your date empty handed, now do ya?" You gave him your signature wink. He smiled and jostled one can about.

"Thanks. I owe you."

"I'll hold you to that!" You teased, flashing you fangs without thinking about it. Steve halted for a moment but then decided that whatever it was he saw, it wasn't important.

You watched as Steve juggled the cans about until one clumsily fell out of his hands. He made sure to place that one under his arm, probably as a way to tell which one was most likely to fizz when opened.

"Took you long enough. What did you get?" She asked. Steve gave her an apologetic shrug as he manoeuvred into the car, somehow managing to mix up the cans.

He held out a can of Coke.

"Wrong can Harrington," You noted as you watched on.

His date looked at it unamused. "It's not even diet," she mumbled to herself. When she popped open the can, she was immediately met by angry fizz spraying all over her cashmere pullover. Steve's face went pale with horror, his mouth hanging low in a half moon shape as his eyes threatened to pop out of their sockets. His date let out a high pitched shriek in protest, and like the ancient art of yodelling, all five of her spying friends made the exact same noise in response. Steve had to pretend to cough so as to not let her find out he almost laughed.

***

Steve had turned into a regular aficionado of the cheesy slasher horror film and you guessed it wasn't by choice. He'd been spending more and more time with you. And the longer you were near him, the more you began to find his charm even more contagious. You liked being around him, you liked how he made you feel when he'd laugh or smile with you. If your heart wasn't dead you'd swear that on some days when he got close enough to you, or when his hand grazed your skin, it would threaten to start beating once more.

On this particular weekend (your favourite weekend since it was actually Halloween) Steve had used the excuse of babysitting as a reason to come by again -even though you both knew the monster film being screened wasn't intended for kids. You and Steve talked about nothing and everything, cracking jokes and being all handsy. To prying eyes, you most likely looked like a couple. In this instance, you were talking about what either of you did during the day.

"It's not like you're allergic to sunlight, Y/N!" Steve jabbed.

"Oh big deal Harrington, so I don't enjoy tanning and going to the beach," You replied. "It's not that uncommon for people to dislike Summer time!"

“Whatever,” he rolled his eyes childishly before offering you some of his popcorn.

“No thanks, I’m not really hungry.” You lied.

"Okay, but think about it. I've never once, not once, seen--"

"Steve! Shhh!" Lucas placed his finger on his mouth, giving Steve a look. "We're trying to watch the movie!"

Steve rolled his eyes and threw a handful of popcorn at the group of kids. "Why don't you just go sit closer?" He asked with a shake of his head. He gave you an apologetic look, "Sorry, as soon as I mentioned the Drive-Thru, they all just tagged along. I had no say whatsoever even though they weren't invited!" He made sure to shout that last bit so they could all hear. Dustin turned around and gave him a big goofy smile and two appreciative thumbs up.

"But seriously, how long have we known each other?" Steve asked as he leaned on the hood of his car as though it were a La-Z-Boy. You eyed his frame from the corner of your eye, enjoying how laid back and open he was right now. Before you could answer, one of the kids he brought with whipped around.

You let out a dark rumble, "Hmmm… Let me think," you pursed your lips and placed a finger under your lower lip. You noticed Steve's eyes flicker towards them with a look of longing before they darted back to the screen, a flush of colour spreading along his nape. You smiled. "Films at this very sophisticated establishment screen for two weeks, and we officially met during the first week of the Great Slasher Marathon. So that makes it-" You mouthed out counting the days to sell your performance. "Ah, yes! Three weeks and two days." You said with a beaming smile.

"Careful, all that math might just overheat your brain," Steve teased, touching your forehead softly with a single digit. You looked up at his finger, paused and then jumped at him with playful chomping noises as you pretended to try and bite his hand away. His hand recoiled and he laughed at your quirkiness before he popped a peanut into his mouth.

"Right, what was I-- Yeah! Three weeks and two days and I've never once seen you out during the day!" He said.

"But Harrington, isn't it the very air of mystery that drew you to me?" You batted your eyelashes flirtatiously, turning your head to the side.

"Nah," he cradled his neck in his laced fingers, looking at the screen with a breezy look. "It was the free Coke's." You punched his side lightly and he grabbed both his sides dramatically.

"Ow!" He chuckled. His fingers brushing against your cold hands. "Are you cold? Your fingers are freezing." He asked with concern.

"A side effect of being immortal," you jested half-heartedly. Steve rose his brows at you. When the silence dragged for too long you smiled at him menacingly and dawned on the thickest, most stereotypical Dracula accent you could, "Muahahaha, foolish mortal. You have fallen into my trap! Now whimper before the immortal Countess Y/N! Or be banished to the concession stand, where thou shalt bring forth snacks for the little critters you hath taken on to babysit!" You pointed a straw like some ancient stave towards the group of kids Steve had dragged along with him.

"You are singlehandedly the second weirdest girl I've ever met, you know that?" He said in soft awe.

You blushed, "That better be a term of endearment, Harrington!" You scolded.

"Oh, believe me! It definitely is..." He looked into your eyes for an extended amount of time. The heat in his eyes and the soft opening of his mouth made your throat ache, and suddenly you were all too aware of just how much you hungered for Steve Harrington. And the hunger wasn't entirely related to the crunching of your empty stomach.

With more haste than you intended, you snapped your face away from Steve's and focused on the screen. Steve shifted subconsciously, suddenly going more rigid. You shook your head, your raven hair bouncing about, before clearing your throat. "How about I get those snacks."

"I can come with if you-"

"Stay and watch the movie. I'm pretty sure I've mastered the whole script of this one. Besides, I get an employee discount." You tried to put on your most winning smile to make sure Steve didn't feel like he was to blame for your weird behaviour. From the way his shoulders drooped at you turning him down, you weren't successful on that front.

You stood in line at the concession stand tapping your feet in exasperation. You were hungry but more than that you were antsy. Suddenly, a jock who was standing around with his drunk buddies made catcalls at you. His wolf whistle not at all subtle.

"Hello, Dolly!" He slurred, stumbling towards you -his breath holding the stale notes of cheap beer. You rolled your eyes. "Hey now, don't be like dat. Come on, sthmile for me..." He motioned to grab your ass when, out of the drunk jocks blindside, an arm grabbed him by the shoulder and spun him around followed by the sound of a fist connecting to an open jaw.

"Get your hands off my girl!" Steve declared.

"Nobody shaid she was taken, man!" The jock protested. Then one of his friends scurried to try and tackle Steve, but your heightened senses picked up on this and you simply stuck your foot out to trip him. He crashed into the dusty ground, grazing his chin.

The boys looked at you with open mouths.

"Is this my cue to declare that ‘nobody touches my Harrington?’" You teased with a sly wink.

Steve shrugged, "That would be nice actually."

You took an instinctive step towards Steve, and he seemed to mirror your actions, but before you could reach him, another jock blindsided him and managed to tackle him.

As Steve wrestled with the musclier jock, you walked over to a group of bystanders who came to watch the commotion, grabbed a soda from one of them and marched over to the fight. You pulled the plastic lid off the paper cup and poured ice cold soda all over the jock -and Steve in the process. Both shrivelled from the cold touch of the ice and broke away from each other.

"Nobody touched my Harrington!" You said with serious eyes before helping Steve up.

When the crowd dissipated, you laced your fingers into his. "So… Is this the customary tradition one performs when asking a girl out?"

Steve squeezed your fingers, "Only if it worked."

"It did," you replied before closing the distance between you and kissing him passionately. Behind you, you heard the kids make kissy noises and the occasional 'Eeww'.

When your lips broke apart, the two of you laughed in glee as Steve wrapped his arms around you. As he walked you back to the car you couldn't help but notice the smell of blood on the ground where the jock scrapped his chin become more and more enticing. You swallowed hard, trying not to focus on Steve's neck pulsing with more vigour from the fight.

Midway through the movie, you noticed the drunk jock from before stumble into a dark corner behind the concession building. "I'll be right back," you told Steve, who was half asleep nuzzled in the crook of your neck.

***

When Steve had noticed you'd been gone for much longer than he anticipated, he got a little anxious. His hands kept fidgeting about, his mind racing back to the image of that asshole jock trying to grab your ass. When he couldn't talk himself down anymore, Steve went looking for you. After searching behind several cars and hey stacks, he finally found you, but he was not at all prepared for what he saw. You, standing over the drunk jock from before, fangs extend and bloody with a look of pure elation on your face. Steve's jaw all but fell to the ground as he flung his arms in the air in exasperation.

***

"Steve?" You asked, caught off guard and feeling the life drain from your body -a feeling that held more irony than you liked. You glanced down at the unconscious jock at your feet and then back to a nervous Steve. You noticed him pacing about, hands on his hips. The silence was killing you.

"Steve, I can explain-" you started, your eyes shining with sadness from the eventual panic and fear he'd undoubtedly have towards you now.

Steve held up his finger and wiggled it around, "You know, I've kept up with a lot. Demogorgon’s, demo-dogs, a kid with magic powers, literally almost getting eaten alive, but… but Vampires? Can't this stupid upside-down place cut me some slack?" He sounded like a grumpy old man who was addressing a group of annoying kids that would steal his newspaper every morning.

"Okay, I guess this is exactly what you think it is..." You walked towards him. He took a step back, pointing at the jock with crinkled eyebrows.

"Is he dead?"

"No. No! Of course not. I- I usually don't… He was just so drunk, and an asshole- besides, he won't remember anything tomorrow." Your voice came out shaky. “Are you mad at me?”

Steve nodded his head repeatedly, "Okay. Good, good." He then kept quiet for a long minute. "My girlfriend is a vampire..." he whispered in bewilderment.

”A vampire?" He questioned the universe, looking up at the sky like it held the answers. "What else are you going to throw at me? Werewolves?"

"Did you say… girlfriend?" Your cheeks blushed.

Steve looked at you as if you said something offensive, "That is what you take away from all this?"

You shrugged, "A girl's gotta have priorities."

Steve laughed nervously before he continued to pace, his mind in deep thought.

You wiped the blood off your lips with your sleeve, taking a slow step forward. This time Steve didn't recline away from you. You felt a glimmer of hope. "Steve, talk to me." You whispered. "Please," you pleaded.

He looked wounded by the way your voice quivered just then and instantly he strode over held you close. After two or three breaths, he let you go again.

"Is this… a permanent condition?" He asked.

"So far," you said playfully.

"Don't joke."

"Sorry," you bit your lips and rose your shoulders above your neck with a pout. You noticed a small smile try and force its way onto his face.

"And… is this," he waved in distaste at the passed out jock, "eating of people also a permanent thing? Because it may put a dampener on any future family dinners where you're the guest and we're the three-course meal."

You held back a laugh, "It doesn't have to be."

Steve let out a breath of air, "Aww, good because if you ate my Mom we'd have some serious baggage!"

You looked at him in surprise, searching his eyes. "Are you not afraid of me? How are you so… okay with all this?"

"If I told you half of what I go through… Half! You'd understand why." He made a 'mind blown' gesture with his hands. "Besides, you're the only non-boring person in this town… And now it makes sense why."

"Does that mean we're okay?"

"That depends," Steve placed his hands on either side of yours. "Were you sent here to do some evil bidding by some nightmare monster that exists in a parallel dimension called the Upside-Down?"

You furrowed your brows, unsure if he was being serious or not. "No?"

He squinted his eyes at your uncertainty. You cleared your throat and spoke again, "I mean, no! Certainly not."

Steve wrapped his arms around you, relief in his voice, "Good because I don't want to ask Eleven to vanquish my new girlfriend."

He leaned in, about to kiss you when he remembered where your fangs had been a few minutes prior. He gave you an odd look, "Maybe we should make it a rule that we only kiss after a thorough brushing after your… meals."

You giggled into his chest, "Deal!"

As Steve walked you back to the car, arm placed protectively around you, you asked: "What's an Upside-Down?"

Steve just sighed and let out an annoyed moan, "Oh, don't get me started!"

***

Note: This fic just kept getting out of hand, it just kept growing longer and longer... I may do a sequel, but no promises. Enjoy and sorry for the wait!

#steve harrington #steve harrington x reader #stranger things imagines #fic request #spooktober comp 2018 #stranger things #vamprire!reader #vampires in Hawkins???

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mytherapistthinksimfunny · 5 years ago

Text

The Endless Thirst of Grace Michaud

It’s almost 11 pm, and in the four hours that I have been home from work, I’ve been reading articles about Adam Driver. Alone in my apartment, I snort to myself as I read The Cut’s “I Want to Be Adam Driver’s Baby” and “21 Things I Would Like to Do With Adam Driver” which I relate to a little too well. I, too, want to “peruse real-estate listings” with Adam Driver.

In my nearly 26 years of living, Adam Driver is this month’s Grace Michaud’s “It Boy.” Last month it was Spike from Buffy the Vampire Slayer. Next month? Who knows, but Henry Cavill is looking mighty fine in The Witcher.

For anyone who has ever known me, this causes little concern. To everyone joining the Grace Michaud journey: welcome. You are about to experience an everyday occurrence.

New friends, or people who only interact with me via social media: I suffer from being infinitely thirsty. My thirst can never be quenched. Usually the thirst comes at a normal level, like any thirst, and starts out as a simple tickle in the throat. If offered a drink I wouldn’t say no. But I don’t actively do anything about it. I could go for a drink, but I’m not about to get up and get one. Then the thought becomes nagging, that maybe I really should get up and get a drink right now. I’ll crave water, a simple free drink that comes from the tap. Soon my thirst becomes more distinct. I’m craving an Arnold Palmer and I need that Arnold Palmer now. I drink and drink and still I’m thirsty, drinking like I’m in the desert, about to die unless I drink the world’s entire water supply right now.

I am, of course, not talking about liquids. I’m talking about men.

An attractive male on a film or show catches my eye, and I make note. Soon I’m watching every movie they’ve ever made until I’m in a downward spiral of interviews in the trenches of YouTube and Google.

I’ve been attracted to the male species since before I could form a concrete memory. The evidence is in a video of my dad teasing me at three about a crush I have on a boy named Ricardo. Wracking my memory, the name sounds familiar, and I’m aware I had crushes when I was in preschool.

How in the world did my tiny brain comprehend the very idea of crushes? That one could feel something more than just friendship with someone? That I, a mere three-year-old just learning how to not urinate my pants, was able to identify that? I’ve dated 30-year-old men who are nowhere near that level of emotionally intelligent.

Who were you, Ricardo? Why was I fascinated with you? Was I attracted to you? Do three-year- olds recognize attraction? Where are you now Ricardo? Have you met your metaphorical Lucy?

So we begin, reader, towards an agonizing life of never-ending attraction to men. Now, I am absolutely not going to go into my dating life. That is just one long humiliating and questionable series of life decisions that even I don’t want to get into. Let’s just say, at 11, there was an entire diary entry of pictures from my yearbook of a kid named Kyle who once took a pinecone out of my hair. I shudder at the thought. And don’t get me started about junior year of high school.

I mention Ricardo to show you that my thirst for men was always there, whether I knew it or not. To me, it seems, it was just a normal feeling that was a part of me. Nothing unusual. My karate teacher was a hottie and probably why I loved going to karate. I loved men so much that I wanted to be them. I dressed in boy’s clothes, even boy’s underwear, and occasionally asked my parents to call me Michael. Now, you’re probably thinking: “Wow there is a lot to unpack here.” But this was 1997 and my parents just went along with it, not really caring as long as I went to bed when they told me to. While others may think something entirely different, I just chalk this up to being that boy crazy. I didn’t start wearing dresses until I hit puberty….but I’m already getting off topic and I don’t want this to turn into an episode of Big Mouth. Let’s try and remain focused here: I’m an obsessive person.

This is my Kindle library as of March 20, 2020:

There is a home movie of my two-year-old self pointing to my Tweedy Bird hat excitedly. “I have Tweedy Bird on my hat!” I repeat over and over with a lisp, clearly very excited I had something I loved on an item of clothing. Even then, when I loved something, I was all in.

Combine my obsessive personality with my attraction to the male species? We descend into madness, my friends. From cartoon characters, to television shows, to actors, to rock stars, to actors again. I obsess most over men I don’t personally know. Think 25 years of pictures covering walls. Merchandise. Staying up till 3 am diving into the corners of the internet for every last drop of information I could get.

And it all started with Bugs Bunny.

Bugs Bunny was my first foray into fangirl territory. It was that episode when Bugs Bunny dressed as a Viking woman that drew me into the Bugs Bunny portal of obsession. I wasn’t attracted to Bugs Bunny in drag, necessarily; I was more fascinated by the idea of Elmer Fudd falling in love with Bugs Bunny. That Bugs was a character that could be loved romantically. I know this sounds really bizarre and heavy, but I fully believe that I was fascinated by romantic love that early in my life.

youtube

Soon I didn’t stop talking about Bugs Bunny. I had an entire Bugs Bunny tracksuit, slippers, and a doll. There’s a picture of me in my entire ensemble while holding the doll, ecstatic. For my fourth birthday my mom made me a homemade Bugs Bunny Halloween costume. Bugs Bunny was even my imaginary friend for a bit there. I must have worn out the Space Jam VHS tape.

Note the Bugs Bunny watch.

That’s childhood obsession for you. When I loved Pokemon all I would do was talk about it and dream about it.

Then it was Digimon. In twenty six years, it hasn’t stopped. Up until December of 2019, it’s been one TV show after the other, examples being Avatar the Last Airbender, Total Drama Island, The Office, The Vampire Diaries, Supernatural, It’s Always Sunny in Philadelphia, Sherlock, Game of Thrones, Mr. Robot, Fleabag, Frasier, and most recently, Buffy the Vampire Slayer. Harry Potter has always been a love for me, and I’ve been obsessed with two different book series: the comic books The Umbrella Academy (the show is a DISASTER compared to how good the comics are), and The Chronicles of Vladimir Tod (a book series about a vampire; as a bonus, see how many vampires you can count). A common theme for all of these things was the fact that I was attracted to a singular male character and their relationship to others.

In preparing to write this I wrote about 6 pages worth of notes, all ranging in obsession. To completely write about every single one would take a novel with each of my multiple obsessions being individual chapters. For example, during the Total Drama Island years I was constantly up till 3 am on the weekends making YouTube videos for the show. If you can find them...I’d be impressed. (But actually, please don’t.) I’ll try to provide a list and a little comment, as I split my obsessions into various categories.

At 11, I discovered the Sprouse twins and my object of desire went from cartoon characters to actors. I was known as “the Sprouse twins” girl, specifically Cole, during sixth grade. This was the first time I covered my room and locker in posters.

A year later, we jumped dramatically and came to my obsessive emo phase. While I listened to a lot of bands, my attention was turned mostly to Pete Wentz of Fall Out Boy and Gerard Way of My Chemical Romance. (The latter I would later meet after MCR broke up when I was about 20 years old after his solo show, and it was just as awkward as I could imagine). That’s when my room was completely covered in Fall Out Boy and My Chemical Romance posters. I wore a lot of black and those years were honestly my cringiest moments. Hey, we were all 13.

I started to shift more from short, skinny, guyliner-wearing men and noticing tall, muscular, and handsome ones. I can pinpoint when I started to first feel sexually attracted to a man (at an appropriate age! I was going through puberty!) when I saw the trailer for Fantastic Four, and Chris Evans came out shirtless in a towel. Oh GOD what an ICONIC moment. Goodbye Sprouse Twins, hello six packs.

The summer going into high school, I saw The Dark Knight 3 times because of Christian Bale as Batman. He walked in wearing that tight black shirt and my expectations for men from there on out would never match up to Batman. Gaston from Beauty and the Beast seemed hotter now (you all know what scene I’m talking about), That attraction became the strangest when I remarked to my friend that Ultron was pretty hot for a robot.

Maybe that’s why I love Kylo Ren so much. He’s the combination of two of my great loves: a buff emo.

The high school years followed a somewhat similar pattern, but mostly actors more so than musicians. To be fair, in high school Fall Out Boy broke up and didn’t get back together till I was in college, and My Chemical Romance only released one album in my four years. So during high school and college there weren't really any “emo” guys or musicians to lust over.

Now in 2020 I live in Brooklyn where every man and their mother is a “musician” so the whole idea turns me off. It was fun while it lasted though, and I’ll always be an emo kid at heart. I’ve seen Fall Out Boy 7 times in the last 10 years, and I paid an insane amount of money for My Chemical Romance reunion tour tickets.

High school was a time where everyone was entering a more mature phase of their puberty journey, and for me, that was lusting after men over the age of 30. I had a hella crush on Zachary Quinto (who I saw walk past me once in the Village and I almost pooped my pants) even though I knew he was gay. I went through a Freddie Mercury phase for a bit too, I mean, come on, that chest hair.

I had a few months lusting after Colin Farrell after seeing him in Fright Night (which I recently found out was written by my favorite Buffy writer! seventeen-year-old me foreshadowing the present). In The Phantom of the Opera I sided with the Phantom the entire time, wishing that I could be seduced through opera in a hidden Parisian cave. My mom introduced me to Ryan Gosling who became my dream man. While reading Great Gatsby I had a huge crush on Seth Meyers who I would imagine Nick Carraway as. He does sort of look like Toby McGuire? He was the first of many goofy men that would lead to John Mulaney, Rob Delaney, Nathan Fielder, Ben Wyatt, and Niles Crane. Chris Pratt still fits into that category, though he’s the perfect combination of goofy and buff. When The Avengers came out my senior year of high school, I saw it 4 times in the theater.

The British invasion didn’t happen until my senior year and defined my college years, with posters of Tom Hiddleston, Benedict Cumberbatch, Tom Hardy, Michael Fassbender, Eddie Redmayne, and James Norton. My feet ache thinking about the times I waited in line at a movie premiere or a film set to get a glimpse of any of these gents. When I saw Benedict Cumberbatch on set in Boston my knees gave out. Domhnall Gleeson is also in that group of fine British men despite being Irish. It’s why I always have a moral dilemma whenever General Hux comes on screen in Star Wars. Twice I had a hardcore crush on Seth MacFarlane, going to the Ted 2 set living in Boston, waving to him as he got into his car. I would meet him again 3 years later when I worked on Harry, looking like a total disaster. But he said “hi” to me which sent me to cloud 9. I once waited in a lobby of a show to meet Lee Pace even though I didn’t see the show.

All of these men at one point adorned my room, desktop background, dorm room (which was covered in posters, no wonder I rarely ever had a boy in there), and phone background. Today my phone background is the throne room scene of Rey and Kylo in The Last Jedi. Why do you think I had Tweedy Bird on my hat? I need my obsession with me at all times and I want the world to see.

(Thank God tattoos are expensive and I was too young to get them during my hardcore obsessions. Imagine if I had a giant Total Drama Island tattoo on my back? I shudder.)

While a lot of the attraction for these men was based on personality, looks, and accents, I also have a tendency to become enamoured with villains and dark characters. In 1999 I was in the movie theater seeing The Phantom Menace. Up until that point, there were virtually no children featured in Star Wars films, so when a young Anakin Skywalker graced the screen, my five-year-old heart would not stop beating. I loved him so much, I carried a Pepsi bottle with his image on it everywhere I went. I slept with it. My comfort blanket was a Pepsi bottle with a picture of a nine-year-old boy.

I had the famous Phantom Menace poster with young Anakin Skywalker with the shadow of Darth Vader behind him. I distinctly remember my dad telling me in the theater, “That’s Darth Vader as a little boy.” When I saw Return of the Jedi my favorite scene was when Luke took off Vader’s mask, because you got to see Vader’s real face for the first time. That Vader actually was a human and not a monster fascinated me to the point of obsession which, as you probably have figured out, still carries over to the sequel trilogy.

Bugs Bunny established my fanaticism, but Anakin Skywalker determined my type: men presented as villains but actually are redeemed over time. Through the years I think I’ve enjoyed getting to figure out someone. Their character is presented as one dimensional, and then even the tiniest thing that strays from that is seen as fascinating. There’s a great quote from an Adam Driver profile in the New York Times that I think encapsulates it:

“A manner so resolute that when some emotion does manage to escape - whether through a glint in his eyes or the unpredictable undulations of his voice - that transgression can’t help but take you by surprise.”

Now my therapist says that probably comes with my need to help and fix the real boys in my life. We both joked that our favorite character in A Haunting of Hill House was the drug-addicted little brother.

I think it is totally unfair, because I know that I can’t personally help them... though ok, she may be a little right.

While I enjoy “complicated” from afar, it does subconsciously fulfill the need for what I can’t do in reality, which is being someone’s reason to change. Mostly through love. Turns out, in real life, it is far less romantic to be dating someone with a lot of emotional issues! Who knew!

You decide for yourself. Here are all the fictional characters I’ve obsessed over who fit this category:

-Kylo Ren (I mean, duh)

-Prince Zuko (the original Kylo Ren)

-The Phantom of the Opera (Thank you, Leslie Knope)

-Damon from Vampire Diaries

-Hot Priest from Fleabag (ok not a villain but he’s supposed to be a holy man and you think aw he’s never gonna...AND THEN HE DOES!)

-Mr. Darcy (again not a villain but he was to Elizabeth at first!!!!)

-Duncan from Total Drama Island

-Draco Malfoy (that bleached blonde hair attraction still hasn’t gone away, oops)

-Spock in JJ Abrams’s last good movie Star Trek

-Spike from Buffy the Vampire Slayer (oh if my heart could beat it would break my chest, how many times have I cried over that sweet platinum blonde baby?)

Look, I know this is all fictional and in no way real. None of these men exist and are all a fantasy. Hey, I watch You and am extremely creeped out by Joe! I don’t root for him! I also hope I don’t stay this way forever. I really don’t want to be a Twilight mom. I’ve calmed down in my old age, ok? I don’t wait in the cold for hours at a stage door anymore, and I go on real dates now. I’ve even had a few boyfriends in my days who were nothing like the men I lusted after nor did I even compare.

I completely agree that all these men would be horrible to date! Draco Malfoy was totally a bigot and bully. Kylo Ren killed his dad, and I have a good relationship with my dad, so I can’t really relate. And yes, Spike before he got his soul is nothing to wish for in a boyfriend, even if it was fun to watch him. Kylo Ren and Spike have killed multiple people. I’m not down to date a murderer.

One day I’ll be able to consume something I enjoy and move on after a week. Growing up, mundane suburban life was a little more interesting when you get lost in a fantasy for a while. To be focused on something other than school, work, or even your own anxieties. If anything, I think my obsessive personality towards men in particular just pushes me to look for more and to yearn for more instead of being depressed that I don’t get to live it. I don’t just settle for the first boy to like me back. I strive to one day not to marry a celebrity, a comedian, or an anthropomorphic cartoon character, but someone who makes me feel like I’m the heroine of my own show.

For now, I’ll just wait for the Phantom to spring me into his underground lair.

Taken 2 minutes before I published this.

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frankensteindotpdf · 7 years ago

Note

All of them

FUCK I KNEW YOU WERE GONNA DO THIS CRAP AHHH

Who’s your crush/squish?

I......tend to have a couple at a time (go unreciprocation whoop whoop) anyhoo the main one is this girl who is SUPER CUTE AND HAS THE CUTEST LAUGH AND IS LOWKEY EMO AND JUST BRILLIANT TBH and fun fact she’s the one who made me realise I’m bi! annnnd there’s a guy....who I just realised I have a crush on....like yesterday....and I’m dying a little

Who’s your fictional crush/squish?

Hahahahahahaha that talks like there’s one.....Remus obviously...Tonks....Dean Winchester...Jughead .....Rapunzel.....Duke Crocker from Haven (holy crap bro).....I used to have a crush on Klaus Baudelaire and also Yo-Yoji (shut up Carina)..... massive squish on Sherlock Holmes....and more I’m forgetting

Worst joke you’ve ever told?

Crap bro my life is full of stupid jokes I can’t choose one

Worst insult you’ve ever given?

Just really dumb ones, nothing specific

Got any weird kinks?

not any weird ones

How did you find out about sex?

No idea, probably like parents or sex ed classes? I don’t remember

Trashiest thing in your wardrobe?

Literally none? I mean I have trash like a billion HP t shirts but nothing revealing or anything

Worst Phobia?

Needles. I literally cry everytime.

Hentai or the real thing?

Ew neither thanks

Ever been arrested?

lol i never go outside no

What are you most selfish about?

This question is worded weird....uh my..sketchbooks? maybe? like I don’t really get the q but I never let anyone draw in my sketchbooks so ig that counts?

Who would you let die if given the chance to save them?

Myself

Who would you sacrifice yourself for?

Anyone

Something silly you believed as a kid?

Well I didn’t think “washcloth” was a real term, for some reason (I have literally no idea why) I thought it was just a word my family used but they were really called something else. I mean washcloth is so... on the nose

Weirdest/most embarassing thing you’ve drawn?

I once.....drew a picture....of my crush.....with a stupid nickname above it....and little hearts....and little pics of the stuff he liked.... UGH I CRINGE JUST THINKING ABOUT IT I WAS IN GRADE 2 DONT JUDGE ME

Controversial role models?

I can’t think of any?

Cringiest fandom you’ve been in?

for like A MONTH I was into... Justin Bieber.

Cringiest thing you’ve shipped?

Trans Gilderoy Lockhart and Snape

Ever had “an accident” in public?

I mean when I was real little I did once after school but like no one was there besides my family so it wasn’t a big deal

What helps you fall asleep?

Honestly watching Bob Ross. He’s just so soothing

What childish things do you still do?

I dunno man...Lots I just can’t think of anything specific

What’s your age?

A HEATHERS SONG AND THE YEAR A WIZARD COMES OF AGE

Grossest thing you’ve eaten?

Some people would say crickets (they tasted great though) I would personally say (not eating but) gargling salt water. I literally threw up. Thanks, father.

Honest opinion on religion?

I definitely like the idea and totally respect other’s beliefs, but I’m still working it out. I mean I know mine pretty darn well but the more I learn the more it just sounds really convienient idk

What does your laugh sound like?

From being told to shut up so much it’s changed a lot....It’s kinda squeaky but mostly silent? I’m a bit self concious about it tbh

How would you describe your smile?

stupid. it scrunches up my face all wrong and makes me look even fatter than I already do

Did you go through any regrettable phases?

“Liking” music everyone else liked to fit in

Ever dropped plans/projects and not said a word?

Not one-on-one stuff (though social anxiety makes me want to every time) but like I guess? nothing noteworthy

Intovert/Extrovert?

INTROVERT

Personality Type?

INFP

Ugliest thing in your wardrobe?

I have this nightgown that I never wear that looks like something out of an 1800s movie...floral pattern and all

Would you wear pajama’s in public?

If I was with friends who were

Weirdest thing that turned you on?

uhhhh I have no idea

Pineapples on pizza????

hecc yes

Do you use the XD emoticon?

Only in an ironic way

Do you have a dark sense of humour?

yup

Worst thing you ship?

Ms. Frizzle and Brendon Urie

Top or bottom?

Oh I cant believe I’m answering this on the internet gosh well from my personality I’d say...bottom

Top or bottom bunk?

Also bottom because I feel like I’ll fall off or break the top bunk

Pettiest thing you’ve cried over?

Dude I cry over everything...My sister said she’d rip one of my books

Pettiest thing you’ve gotten mad over?

Bro again like I usually get upset at myself rather than mad at other people but like at my family basically everything?

Longest time you’ve cried?

lol well multiple times I’ve cried for a few hours straight, I cried through an entire movie once (I’m not evenexaggerating I had to pause it because I was sobbing too hard literally 5 times)

Do you touch the art in museums?

NO THAT CAN WRECK IT AND I COULD GET IN TROUBLE

Do you have a fandom OC?

Kinda? I mean just self-inserts tbh

How much do you believe in astrology?

not at all

Have you ever used a base for drawing?

I mean I’ve copied them down but not traced

Have you ever used MSPaint for drawing non-ironically?

yup. there was a time when I had a laptop and sucked at drawing so when I got bored I’d draw on MSPaint

Controversial opinion?

I’m a feminist and I think everyone should be

Ass or chest?

I hate answering this I’m just gonna do it quickly and get it over with female ass, male chest

Chest or genitals?

chest

Genitals or ass?

I HATE THESE I HAVE NO IDEA OK

Any scars?

Yup. I have one on my arm from burning myself while baking in grade 8, and two others on the inside (of the same arm haha) that are from somehow managing to hit my arm off a staple sticking out of an old recliner

Do you pirate anything?

Only music for animatics, but even then only songs I’ve already bought but cant transfer. I don’t see the point. The artists I like I don’t just like for their music (or movies or whatever), I like them as people too. I want to thank them for making such awesome stuff, so a little donation is totally reasonable to me

url for an old cringy social media account?

I mean this one? I wasnt allowed to have social media when I was younger so yay none of that

Any post’s you’ve deleted and why?

Only ones I accidentally reblogged onto my art blog, but I always reblog them onto my main first

How long does it take you to get up in the morning?

depends. if I have nothing to do, hours. If I have school, anywhere from 5 minutes to an hour (I set my alarm real early)

What will instantly turn you on?

idk man nothing really...someone being good with kids is always sweet tho

Fave eye+hair colour combination?

Nothing specific, I like basically all colours?

Have you already named your future children?

If I have any they will be named after someone in one of my billions of fandoms (probably someone from hp)

Do you do drugs?

Just Ibuprofen amirite lol even then I am in pain way more than I take it I hate swallowing pills

How tall are you?

about 5′5 or 5′6

Did you go through a “RANDOM XD” phase?

yup

Dumbest thing you believed?

No idea, probably something from when I was little but idk

Dildo of choice? (besides an actual dildo)

boi i’m not even coming near this question (get it?)

Daddy kink?

I mean I find it hot when some people say it? but not really

Who could change your sexuality just by looking at you?

I’m...bi....so like.....no one? I’m confused mate there’s no way to answer this question

Bara/Yaoi/Shota?

none tbh i dont even know what 2/3 of those mean

What area’s of your body are most sensitive?

besides the obvious my knees, stomach, back, neck....okay everything I just hate people touching me thanks oh and my feet oh gosh I got a pedicure once and it was the worst experience of my life

Weirdest dream you’ve had?

A bunch man, once I had a dream where Peeta was transformed by the Capitol or smth to look like one of my friends and he was also heavily drugged and at my school for some reason and I was trying to help him get to safety....I had a dream where my family and I lived in a trailer park and our neighbour had a big dog that attacked my little brother, first by biting and then picking up a stick with its paws and beating him with it....one where my friend tried to touch my stomach and i panicked, punched him in the face, and then had a panic attack because I felt so bad

THANK GOSH THAT’S OVER

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der-aggressor · 6 years ago

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All the questions!

Oh, you're mad! Suck my dick while I'm busy answering. Or let me sit on your dick. Whatever, I'm a little drunk right now, it might affect the answers.

Who’s your crush/squish?I don't have any. I just drool over attractive persons and hope it comes to a sexual encounter.

Who’s you fictional crush/squish?Unlike many other nerds I can't see me wanting to fuck a fictional person or fall in love with one. When I can't touch them I don't want them.

Worst joke you’ve ever told?Mh...I guess there had been a lot. But right now I'm really entranced by this pick up line: 'Is this a knife in your pocket or are you happy to see me?' Haha. I don't find it bad, but I can imagine it makes others rolling their eyes.

Worst insult you’ve ever given?Hey, come on. I'm a nice person. When I really insult someone it's mostly because I'm joking. But well...is telling someone they are a piece of shit in bed an insult? Because in my dominant role I really enjoy ensulting...

Got any weird kinks?Define 'weird'. You tell me. But since I'm into a few things most people have as a hard limit I guess it could be a little weird.

How did you find out about sex?My ex-master showed me. But actually it was immediately a part of me when I started my life 2.0. Sounds confusing if you don't know about the weird thing that's my life, but it's the truth.

Trashiest thing in your wardrobe?It's still the colorful scarf I've stolen from a toddler. Actually I look alright in my clothes. No trashy stuff.

Worst Phobia?I don't like moths. Besides of that I'm not that touchy.

Hentai or the real thing?The real thing. But when there are tentacles include hentai can be better than some real thing.

Ever been arrested?No. I'm a good boy.

What are you most selfish about?My sexual charisma.

Who would you let die if given the chance to save them?Mh? I don't know! But I guess there are some people. Instincts are mostly stronger than morals.

Who would you sacrifice yourself for?For a man who is not afraid to fuck me? Maybe I should sacrifice myself to the devil, I heard he has a big dick and enough muscles to hold me down if I'm in struggling-mood.

Something silly you believed as a kid?I can't remember my childhood.

Weirdest/most embarassing thing you’ve drawn?Haha. I really suck at drawing so everything is actually embarrassing, besides of that I don't draw often. But once I drew my ex-master getting sucked off by a doggish creature which should embody me. Of course it didn't look as I had expected it to look, but I was drunk and bored.

Controversial role models?Myself probably.

Cringiest fandom you’ve been in?Is the manga and anime fandom cringy enough?

Cringiest thing you’ve shipped?Myself and a forest in which female genitals grow.

Ever had “an accident” in public?What kind of accident? Peeing myself? Shitting myself? No. But I once jizzed in my pants during a gig. But not one of my own gigs. It was while watching BAAL and wearing a vibrating plug...my ex-master had guessed I found Mikito attractive...

What helps you fall asleep?Having burned off energy during the day and having my sexual needs satisfied. That's the secret for a good sleep.

What childish things do you still do?Talking to my teddy bear. Using swings on playgrounds. Actually I still do some childish things, but it's way more fun if I can play with a cute little boy!

What’s your age?37.

Grossest thing you’ve eaten?This Russian woman's pussy I guess...

Honest opinion on religion?Believing in something is important, but only as long as you don't bother others with your views. I'm not religious but if it's the way someone wants to go then I have to accept it.

What does your laugh sound like?0:42...like a dying pig. This high-pitched noise in the end is coming from me as well...

How would you describe your smile?I tend to smile with only one corner of my mouth moving so it mostly looks a little roguish.

Did you go through any regrettable phases?On the one hand I regret the way my life 1.0 ended, but on the other one I wouldn't be the person I'm today without it. So I can't say I regret something.

Ever dropped plans/projects and not said a word?It's rather that others drop plans. I don't tend to do so.

Intovert/Extrovert?Extrovert.

Personality Type?ENFJ

Ugliest thing in your wardrobe?This was already asked, mh? If it would look ugly I wouldn't own it, huh? Maybe the clothes hangers are the ugliest things.

Would you wear pajama’s in public?What? No. I still look like a little child in pajamas, assumed I'm shaved. People would ask me where my mommy is. And why should I even?

Weirdest thing that turned you on?Tentacles probably. Or imagining being a dog.

Pineapples on pizza????The amount of question marks. Well, pineapples make your cum taste better, so I choose them.

Do you use the XD emoticon?No. I don't use many emoticons at all.

Do you have a dark sense of humour?A little bit tending to the dark side, yes.

Worst thing you ship?Myself with myself.

Top or bottom?Both.

Top or bottom bunk?Bottom since I tend to move much in sleep and it makes others crazy, haha.

Pettiest thing you’ve cried over?The fact that Yoshi Kawasaki has a PA nowadays probably. No, not really. But it looks damn tasty...

Pettiest thing you’ve gotten mad over?A porn stopping to load while I'm really close.

Longest time you’ve cried?Some minutes. Really, I don't know.

Do you touch the art in museums?It doesn't happen often that I go to museums, but I'm a haptic person so this definitely can happen. Nothing is safe from my fingers.

Do you have a fandom OC?No.

How much do you believe in astrology?There's some truth in astrology, but in the end you shouldn't see this as something too important because most things are formulated in a way that makes it apply to everyone.

Have you ever used a base for drawing?I don't draw.

Have you ever used MSPaint for drawing non-ironically?No.

Controversial opinion?Open or poly relationships can make you happy.

Ass or chest?Asses on men, chest on women.

Chest or genitals?Both on women, genitals on men.

Genitals or ass?Genitals.

Any scars?No. Really. My ex-master didn't want to destroy my flawless skin since I was his work of art.

Do you pirate anything?Yes. Everyone does nowadays, mh? Mostly it's porn.

url for an old cringy social media account?Not really but:

Any post’s you’ve deleted and why?Can't remember I ever did so. Maybe I wouldn't even delete dick pics I posted while I'm drunk.

How long does it take you to get up in the morning?Depends. In the summer time when I'm full of energy I take ten minutes, but in winter I sometimes need an hour and a blowjob, haha.

What will instantly turn you on?This depends a little on my mood. But I love pierced men. And the sound of a slap on the butt turns me on as well. Or seeing a hot dude getting slapped in the face. Sometimes his glance is so glassy afterwards...I love it. Okay, now I'm horny.

Fave eye+hair colour combination?Black hair and colorful contact lenses. Undercuts and sclera lenses are the best combination, no matter which color. I love it if someone looks like an alien.

Have you already named your future children?I don't even know if I will ever have children, so I never thought about this topic.

Do you do drugs?No.

How tall are you?165 cm. I'm easy to kidnap.

Did you go through a “RANDOM XD” phase?Mh? I really doubt this. What's this? Explain it to an old man.

Dumbest thing you believed?That I'm like alcohol and can make everyone happy.

Dildo of choice? (besides an actual dildo)I once had a microphone inside...well, it's not advisable. Go for sex toys that are made for this purpose. One day I buy myself a dildo that's shaped like a dog's dick and see how this feels...

Daddy kink?Haha. Apparently.

Who could change your sexuality just by looking at you?In which way should my sexuality change? I'm already into everything. But back then in Germany there were some really disgusting old men hunting my butt and this turned me off.

Bara/Yaoi/Shota?Please nothing with children's bodies. That's a no go. Besides of that everything is fine, but I'm not the biggest Yaoi-fan anyway. A mixture of Yaoi and Bara would be perfect. Too many big muscles aren't that great either.

What area’s of your body are most sensitive?Ears, neck, armpits, hips, the inside of my buttcheeks.

Weirdest dream you’ve had?I dreamed that I sold my shit on ebay and then the police stood in front of my door - to buy my shit.

Thank you!

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