#this is really rambly the point is all tangled up

[gaysheep]

re:lrb

content warnings are a good thing but i feel a certain culture surrounding them has arisen that denies to distinguish between content and execution

the idea behind them is "tell someone ahead of time if a piece of art deals with a sensitive subject so they can be informed about watching it." some people wring hands about it but i think this is basic etiquette? the average person would warn a friend who recently had a parent die if a movie they're going to see deals heavily with the topic. "hits too close to home" is a phrase for a reason.

i think the issues here are:

the gradual shift from "i personally cannot consume this because it contains something that upsets me" to "no one should consume this/it shouldn't have been made because it contains something bad," how the subject was handled notwithstanding

increasing number of people flat out refusing to engage with anything that makes them uncomfortable whatsoever

most people have a certain subset of hard nos: "if a movie has this in it, i'm not watching it." what will come to mind for most people reading this post is probably ptsd triggers, but this is actually super broad. splatterhouse films are understood to be a niche subgenre of horror; there are plenty of people who can watch a scary movie but can't stomach graphic gore. american audiences very notoriously don't like when children die in movies but might make an exception if it's tasteful and thematically relevant.

i appreciate content warnings because being given advanced notice that there's an onscreen sexual assault in something keeps it from shocking me. it removes the element of anticipatory dread at the start of a scene where i'm not sure if it's going to be sexual assault. the warning itself allowed me to make an informed decision in watching it.

i can't watch, read, listen to, or play just about anything that contains cannibalism not just because it's upsetting but because it's an ocd trigger. no matter how brief or not-graphic it is, i can't control the way i'll latch onto and obsess over any detail given to the point where i physically become nauseous.

there are going to be "hard no" situations like that and that's fine, and you should be able to make an informed decision about whether you can handle something right now, but i think we should be more open-minded about the fact that art is a vehicle for critique and the presence of "sensitive content" on its own is neutral

[teamatsumu]

L&DS BOYS - LOVE LANGUAGES

content warnings: fem!reader, fluff, sfw headcanons

XAVIER - PHYSICAL TOUCH

Xavier knows he is smart, and witty enough. But when things get a little too real, he finds it hard to express himself.

And the feelings he has for you are the most genuine ones he has felt in his long, long life.

While he might not be someone who can wax poetic about his affection for you, he shows it in other ways, and physical touch in his favorite way to get his feelings across.

When you walk next to each other, he sticks close, arm brushing against yours. Occasionally, the back of his hand makes contact with your own. It's almost as if the tension builds and builds, until he finally connects your fingers, either intertwining your hands together or linking his pinkie with yours. No words leave his mouth. His touch says enough.

If the train is too crowded, he will pull you closer to him with a firm touch on the small of your back, making sure you don’t receive any unwanted bumps from strangers.

For a few weeks in your relationship, he developed a strange habit of pinching your cheeks and lightly pulling on them. You let him do it, knowing he would eventually move on and find some other part of you to focus on. Though the action did make your face heat up.

Another weird hyperfixation he has is nibbling at your fingertips absentmindedly. He plays with them often, but when he is distracted by a movie you two are watching, he will bite at them every so often. Sometimes, he is so focused on the screen that you doubt he even realizes what he is doing.

(He realizes. He just thinks every part of you deserves love. Don’t question it. It makes sense in his head.)

Cuddling with him is the perfect gift for your senses, stimulating you wonderfully.

Small nips on your skin, little lingering touches. He traces your skin with eager yet gentle hands, as if trying to memorize every curve and dip.

He buries his face in your neck and breathes in deep, and in that moment, bodies tangled with each other and the sheets, vulnerable and open, he will whisper, “I love you”.

It’s an affirmation more than a revelation, since his actions up until this point have all shown you that he really, truly does love you. So you whisper it back, trying to pour all your love into it, before slotting your lips together and using physical touch to convey your feelings right back.

RAFAYEL - WORDS OF AFFIRMATION

Rafayel is, in the simplest of terms, a yapper.

This man could talk for hours if you don’t stop him. About his art, about the meaning of life, about his experiences. He can express so much while also having an impeccable talent of being completely vague. Sometimes, you don’t even understand the things he says. And you’ve given up trying to decipher his every word.

But when Rafayel is talking about you, he makes himself abundantly clear. There’s no ambiguity about it; he loves you. And he will say it a million different times in a million different ways. Whether it be a bold declaration of how much his heart yearns for you, or endless teasing that is meant to rile you up and get a reaction out of you.

“I don’t think your talent lies in art, babe. It’s a good thing you’re a walking art piece yourself. No wonder I’m in love with you.”

“You’re leaving so soon? But I don’t think I’ve admired you enough for today. Don’t leave me!”

I’m impressed, Miss Bodyguard. You’re talented, and easy on the eyes. No wonder you captivated me from that very first day we met.”

Expect to wake up with a lot of voice notes on your phone. Minutes long. Sometimes rambling, sometimes actual ideas for new pieces that he wants to run by you. You better reply to all of them individually.

When you cuddle at night, you can talk for hours. No topic on earth is off limits with him. He will lay you down on a blanket on the beach, and as you watch the stars, he will tell you stories from olden times about star crossed lovers and tragic fairy tales. And he will turn to you, tell you how beautiful you are, how ardently he loves you, how he will never forget any moment he spends with you.

It’s almost like you can tell the exact moment he falls in love with you. Because he tells you. He never stops telling you. He voices his fears of you leaving him, he makes you promise you will never go away. He is clingy and he is whiny, and he is so endearing.

It’s hard to dismiss him when he is so loud about his love. And it’s hard to not fall for him just as he falls for you.

ZAYNE - ACTS OF SERVICE

This is an indisputable fact. Dr Zayne shows his love through acts of service.

He is intensely aware of your needs, and is miles ahead of you in determining what you require at any given moment.

It’s his way of showing you that he cares. He worries for you, and born from that worry is the urge to take care of you.

If you have had a long day, you will come home to a text from him saying he has ordered takeout and it will arrive at your house shortly, since he knows you are too exhausted to cook anything. It is always something different, but it is always food that he knows you enjoy. He will mix it with some healthy options too.

If you ever crash at his place, you will wake up to a tall glass of water and two aspirin on the side table, along with a note in his neat handwriting telling you that there is fresh cooked breakfast in the oven (he made it before he left for work).

Once you two are in a steady relationship, he keeps his house stocked with products you use. A spare shampoo and conditioner, toothbrush, a bathrobe of your size, a hair brush, you name it.

When you mumble something about the hand cream in your purse that is nearly running out, you will find a brand new tube next time you open the purse, and there is no need to even ask. You know Zayne put it there.

He is intensely observant. Even after knowing him for so long, it catches you off guard. He knows which of your clothes need to be dry cleaned and which ones are good for the washing machine. He knows which scents you use. Which products are harsher on your skin. He knows that contacts irritate your eyes after long hours of wearing them, so he keeps a small bottle of eye drops in your side table for that very purpose.

He scolds you for neglecting yourself, and he won’t hold back the harsh tone if he thinks your behavior is particularly destructive. To him, the best way to show love is to make sure your beloved is living the best life they can.

It is the littlest things, the tiniest details. And it shocks you, even after so long.

[slytherin-princess-x]

Don’t get caught

Theodore nott x y/n riddle

An/ hi guys I’m back with a new short story, enjoy

The air in my dorm room was thick, charged with the illicit thrill of stolen moments. Theodore’s hands were tangled in my hair, his lips hot and demanding against mine. My back was pressed against the cool wood of the door, my legs locked around his waist for balance. The world outside the confines of our clandestine bubble ceased to exist.

We’d been doing this for weeks now, navigating the treacherous waters of Hogwarts’ social scene while attempting to keep our relationship a secret. It was a dangerous game, one made all the more exhilarating by the lurking threat of discovery. Tonight, the risk felt palpable as his fingers grazed my bare skin beneath my school shirt, sending shivers that had nothing to do with the cold castle air.

Then, the world crashed back in with a jarring knock. My heart leaped into my throat, and I knew, before I even heard their voices, that our recklessness was about to catch up with us.

“Hey y/n, open the door!” Mattheo’s voice boomed from the other side, followed by Tom's, more measured but just as insistent, "Open up y/n."

Panic, cold and sharp, shot through me. I pulled away from Theo, my cheeks burning. The kiss was broken, the spell shattered. Theo, his grey eyes flashing with annoyance, released me, clearly frustrated at the interruption. I scrambled to unwrap my legs from his waist, my movements jerky and hurried. He was about to protest, his mouth opening to say something, but I slapped a hand over his lips, my eyes wide with warning.

“Shhh!” I hissed, pointing to the narrow gap between the door and the wall. He glared, but understood the gravity of the situation.

I pushed him behind the door where he wouldn’t be seen when I opened it. My shirt was disheveled, my breathing heavy, the only thing I had was my school shirt and my underwear. I tried to appear as calm as possible under the circumstances. Taking a deep breath, I edged the door open just enough to create a narrow opening, my back pressed against the frame.

“Hey Mattheo,” I said, my voice a little breathy. I focused my gaze on my brother's face, careful not to let my eyes wander past the threshold. “I’m kinda busy, sorry.”

Mattheo tilted his head, a flicker of suspicion in his dark eyes. "Busy? At this hour? What could be so important that you can't open the door?" he questioned, a smirk tugging at the corner of his mouth. Tom, ever the observer, stood behind Mattheo, his expression unreadable. I knew what they were both thinking.

My mind raced, trying to come up with a believable explanation. "Oh you know… study, cleaning… loads of things" I rambled, wincing at the patheticness of my alibi. It was clear I was flustered and it didn't go unnoticed by my brothers.

Meanwhile, Theo decided to be a menace. I felt his tongue dart out to lick my palm. He was testing me, pushing the boundaries of our precarious game. It was a dumb move, but a wave of something almost like amusement washed over me. I knew what he was doing. He wanted to see what I would do when put under pressure. Wrapping my hand around his neck, I squeezed gently, my nails grazing his skin. His eyes widened slightly, but he didn't resist, the amused smirk still playing on his lips. I knew what he wanted. If he wanted to play, I would play.

"You sound a little out of breath" Tom stated, his eyes narrowing as he scanned the small gap through the door.

"I um.. was just doing some yoga to wind down" I stammered, trying to maintain a straight face. I could feel Theo fidgeting behind the door, I hoped he would stay put.

Mattheo chuckled, a low, rumbling sound that sent another wave of panic through me. "Yoga? Really?" He was obviously not convinced either.

"Yeah, it helps me relax, you know?" I continued to lie, wishing I had an invisibility cloak handy.

I could feel their eyes piercing me, trying to see through the narrow gap. The tension was thick enough to cut with a knife. This was it, I thought, they were going to figure it out. I could almost hear Theo's exasperated sigh behind me.

"Well, if you're not going to open the door, I guess we'll just go" Mattheo said. He backed away slightly, Tom following him.

"Whatever" I huffed, trying to act like it didn't bother me that they didn't believe me with a small roll of my eyes.

The brothers gave me one last look before finally turning away. As soon as I heard their footsteps fade down the hall, I slammed the door shut, letting out a shaky breath of relief.

I immediately turned to Theo, my gaze full of equal parts panic and anger. "That was too close!' I hissed, my voice trembling. He peeled my hand off his mouth, his expression still annoyed despite the close call.

"Tell me about it, now where were we?" he said grabbing my face and pulling me in for another kiss, my panic immediately forgotten as I was swept into our secret world once more.

Taglist: @yootvi @redeemingvillains @littlemadamred @smut-anarchy

[meganegatari]

omg I know I’m a bit of a yapper with all these ideas don’t mind me, but what d’you think Ellie would be like during aftercare?

sorry about me yapping, my brain is rotted with so many ideas smh

no pls i always need more ideas!! i love these little bite-sized things where i can just yap for a bit instead of being insanely extra like with reqs and other things...VERY CHEESY, TOOTH-ACHINGLY FLUFFY RAMBLE AHEAD:

she'd be real sweet with it, of course. making sure you're okay, cuddling until the sun comes up, she'd run you two a sweet-smelling bath and make your favorite meal, she's just an angel!

right after the heat of the moment was over, the two of you would tangle up in the sheets, warm, still-trembling limbs strewn to all sides, cuddled up as close as humanly possible. chests up against each other, it was like your hearts were holding hands, the way they were beating in synch. she would just melt into you, hold you close to her, your face buried in her neck or chest so tightly, she'd stroke your head and make drawings on your back lightly with her nails. not enough to hurt but gentle as a feather, to calm and establish even more closeness, she loved tracing your smooth skin with her fingers.

after more cuddling, some conversations, checking in with one another and mumbling "i love you"s , she would get up very gingerly, and get both of you a drink of water, then return to bed to sit next to you. ensue more deep talks, pouring your hearts out to each other, telling each other everything. and we can't forget the jokes she cracks, as if its her life's mission to make you sick of her. during all of this though, she wouldn't be able to tear her eyes off of you, she would look at you with such adoration, the visible sparkle in her eyes almost made you shy. "stop looking at me..." you whisper, your face heating up under her stare. she grins from ear to ear and reassures you, "you're just so beautiful, i can't help it!" and you did look beautiful, she was right. it was her favorite thing in the world to care for and admire you. the satisfied post-sex glow looked good on everyone, her as well. pink blush on her features, auburn strands disheveled in just the right way.

then she'd run a bath and get in with you, still holding you close to her. she would wash your hair for you too, and you two would split a face mask for some extra pampering. you felt so loved, and questioned daily if your heart could handle this, because she proved to you endlessly what love really is and how much you deserved.

she would also make your favorite meal, whatever in the world you requested, you could request even something like unicorn steak, and she would immediately be up on her feet in the kitchen, delicious simmering sounds and aromas floating around her. humming take on me under her breath, naturally. bonus points if she wears an apron with nothing under it, lol.

you watch her while you sit at the table, mesmerized by her skillful movements and clear enthusiasm she had for caring for her love. when it was all done, she'd serve it to you with a flourish, "tadaaa, only the best for my everything." she was so smooth with it, always seeking to impress you, and when you tasted it, she watched your reaction with a toothy grin on her face, eager to know what you think. then later on you two would return to the cozy bed, tangling up together once more, but this time to finally fall into a restful and healing sleep, where you would meet in your dreams too. frolicking around hand in hand, you never imagined a better life with her, and were grateful for every day you got to spend by her side. <3

[lcriedlastnight]

Fake dating and drunken kisses with Oscar. The drunken kisses, with reader's fingers in Oscar's hair and reader sitting in his lap, kissing him with no restraint; things getting heated, Oscar's hands slipping under reader's top and earning a slight shiver from her. All the while, Oscar could only wish reader would kiss him like this when they're sober. Oscar lets that thought linger until they both fall asleep in each other's arms after kissing way too many times to count because they can't seem to get enough of each other.

thanks anon, lovely! i appreciate you very much.

tw: fem!reader. maybe a few swears. not spell checked. not too sure, lmk if you want me to add any.

w/c: 1.8k

it wasn’t oscar’s idea, he swears. but now he’s here, at this club, filled with his fellow drivers, random celebrities he can’t be arsed to learn the names of, multiple fan girls trying to get with lando and you.

he wasn’t even sure it was lando’s idea to go out to some random club in miami to celebrate his first win. it probably was, if he thought straight, but how could he? with a mix of a constant supply of alcohol and you swimming through his veins, he doesn’t know how anyone expects him to think straight.

he had the pleasure of you being glued to his side from the moment the both of you stepped into the club, your hand not leaving his arm for a whole thirty minutes.

this was all for show of course, but his friends around him didn’t know this, they thought whatever you and him had going on was real and it was nights like these where he could play into his deepest fantasies. the ones where you’re not all over him because you have to be, but because you want to be. like he longs for you to be.

you started off sitting beside him. your hand sitting loosely on his forearm, your touch light and tickling a little as you run your fingers over his bare skin. the more drinks you were convinced to down with lando, and the shots logan told you tasted so good, ended up with you being a little more than drunk.

so you went from sitting politely beside him, three hours before, to your legs slung over his lap, half sitting on him half not.

because oscar had had significantly less than you to drink tonight he was way less drunk and more tipsy. drunk enough to follow in your footsteps with how affectionate you were being. although he didn’t think he had to have alcohol to do it. just your permission.

“the thing is, batman really did hate the joker he was just afraid to let him know it. he for sure has like emotional problems or something. but by the end of the film he lets everyone in and it’s so nice!”. you had just finished explaining the plot of the lego batman film to oscar. he nodded along, listening as best as he could, although you did loose him at some points, he would have to watch it to see what you were talking about.

the table was almost empty by the end of your ramble, everyone having left because they didn’t really care much, neither did oscar but he cared about what you cared about so maybe he did.

he hums as his hand played with your hair, brushing it away from your face and tangling it between his fingers. he had a strong urge to kiss you right now. but your agreement had been to only kiss if everyone wasn’t convinced, which meant you guys had only kissed once or twice. and that was at the start of- well whatever this was. everyone was easily convinced you two were together. oscar didn’t know whether to be happy at annoyed.

oscar’s knocked out of his thoughts by you shuffling around to sit yourself on his lap. your smile bright.

“thanks for listening osc. m’gonna kiss you now, okay?” you mumble out, your hands holding onto his shoulders. oscar’s on your hips, holding you still.

he barely get a second to even register your words before your leaning down and locking your lips on his. he feels guilty because you’re way more drunk than him but before he can pull away from you, your mouth opens and you’re sloppily kissing him a little bit harder. he returns the favour, quickly.

you’re both interrupted by a voice calling over to you both to ‘get some!’. you pull away embarrassed, hiding your head in the crook of oscar’s neck. his hands jump to cradle the back of your head and your neck. his touch gentle and loving. oscar wants to kill whatever driver hollered at them. now you’re embarrassed and you’ll probably never want to kiss him again!

after maybe ten minutes you pop your head out from it’s hiding place. your eyes glassy as you stare at oscar.

“can we go home?” you ask him. you seem less drunk than you were before the kiss. maybe it sobered you up? oscar thinks for a moment before replying. “home?”.

“your room.” you clarify. your words come out shy, which surprises him. he’s never really seen you shy before. it’s a side he comes to enjoy. he nods at your words and quickly pulls his phone out to book an uber for you both.

you ungraciously pull yourself off his lap and stand, wobbling in your heels next to the table, waiting on him. oscar is quick to follow suit, making sure he has your purse and that your purse has all your things inside. once he’s sure he has everything he grabs your hand in his.

“c’mon pretty. we gotta say bye to lando first before we leave.” he tells you, voice all soft and syrupy. you nod, agreeing.

oscar pulls you through all the dancing bodies on the dance floor, his hand gripping yours tightly making sure you wouldn’t get lost in the crowd of people. he eventually spots lando in the corner and explains that you’re both leaving.

“you’re leaving! why?!” lando complains over the loud, thumping music. you wobble on your heels and half fall into oscar, who catches you quickly, like if you were to fall you would die.

“we’re getting pretty tired” oscar tells him, his eyes saying sorry, but he wasn’t really. not when you were coming home with him. lando pouts and complains but eventually bids you both goodnight before finding his dance partner again.

oscar says goodbyes to other people he sees on the way to the door, hand still clutching yours. you mumble your goodbyes too not wanting to seem rude. the uber is waiting for you both outside and oscar couldn’t be more glad wanting to get you to the hotel as soon as he can.

the boy helps you inside then gets inside too. he helps you buckle your belt, the alcohol in his system helping him converse with the driver, his hand glued to your thigh, rubbing softly.

you rest the side of your head on the car door and it thumps against it as the car follows the roads bumps and turns. oscar looks at you in concern but doesn’t mention it. the ride to the hotel isn’t as long as you thought it would be but you think it must be because of the alcohol.

oscar helps you out the car and thanks the driver before grabbing your hand again and leading you into the hotel. he thanks his luck once again this night, as he thinks about how lovey you were being with him. he knows you don’t do it normally because it’s not in your agreement unless necessary but god, to have you touch him like this when you were sober.

you both cling to each other in the elevator as oscar presses soft kisses to your shoulder as you stand in front of him. you lean your head back on his chest, revelling in his affection. the elevator stops at his floor and he leads you to his room.

“i’m sleeping in your bed with you tonight, by the way” you say as he swiped the key card and ushers you inside.

oscar’s brows jump up in surprise and amusement as a smirk makes its way to his mouth. “where else would you be sleeping, hm?” he asks.

that stupid smirk just makes you want to kiss it off of him, so you do. you lean up on your tiptoes to kiss him gently. oscar feels you straining and leans down to kiss you better. your hands make their way up to his hair to tug a little, earning yourself a little groan. this makes you smile into his mouth. he pulls away at this.

oscar doesn’t think his life can get any better as be presses firm kisses to your lips before pulling away, your own lips chasing his. he throws his head back with a silent groan before asking, “m’kay pretty girl, time for bed?”. you nod and let him lead you to get ready for bed.

you take significantly longer than oscar to get ready for bed, so he sits in his once lonely bed waiting for you, thinking about how good he must’ve been in his past life to be able to do this with you tonight. he wants to be this domestic with you for the rest of his life. he’s not even being dramatic. the sound of your footsteps breaks him out of his train of thoughts.

“hey, look at you! c’mere pretty.” oscar coos as he pats his lap, signalling for you to sit. you follow his directions and clamber into his lap, still a little drunk. the boy holds back a chuckle. he feels drunk then too but not off those stupid shots you took with logan, off your touch. he thinks about your dress from tonight. then he kisses you again.

oscar traces your lips with his tongue and you open for him, letting him in. you kiss each other lazily, you’re in no rush. your hands find his hair again tugging again. in retaliation his own hand moves from your waist to slide underneath your (his) t-shirt. he lays a big, open palm on your back, almost supporting you as you sit on top of him.

you two kiss for what seems like days but is only a few hours. oscar can tell from your kiss bitten lips. he smiles at your tired and glassy eyes as you tell him you’re tired.

you end up with your face pressed against his chest and your legs tangled up with his, your feet touching his somehow. you mumble into his chest, but oscar misses it.

“what, pretty?” he asks, a hand scratching gently at your scalp to help lull you to sleep.

“said night osc.” you tell him, a little louder this time. he grins at your tired voice.

“oh. sorry, g’night pretty girl” oscar must be too late though as he feels your breath even out. he sighs to himself, his hand still moving. there’s no way he was getting sleep any time soon. mind racing around the fact that he could be doing this every night with you, if he just told you.

your touch, your kisses, every night. oscar loved seeing you free tonight. he wanted that for you everyday. there was definitely a conversation to be had tomorrow.

[wheeboo]

sleeping beauty | boo seungkwan

SYNOPSIS. in which you fall asleep on your boyfriend's lap. PAIRING. boo seungkwan x gn!reader GENRE. fluff, established relationship, just him <3 WARNINGS. terms of endearment WORD COUNT. 1.6k

requested by @boorines: 2k!!! congratulations on the milestone rania <33 i have a teeny req for your event! seungkwan + #38 from list one! super super excited to read all your work 💗 - #38: "Well, hello, sleeping beauty. You fell asleep on me."

notes: mick !!! my fellow lovely amazing boosadan tysm for requesting i hope u enjoy this <33

join the 2k celebration!

You like to think that your boyfriend's voice is simply a gift from the heavens.

Not just his voice too, of course, but solely just... him. You don't think you'll ever understand the way how time seems to slow down when he speaks. It's like the world hits mute, the background noise fading away until all that's left is the low rumble in his chest when he laughs, or the way his voice dips ever so slightly when he whispers against your ear.

It's a superpower, perhaps𑁋you really consider it at this point. He's magical. Your boyfriend is woven of magic, with this ability to bottle up time with just a smile and a nonsensical ramble. It makes you wonder if maybe you should bottle him up and keep him close so the world can always feel like this: a little slower, a little more yours.

All you can remember is Seungkwan talking about something that you can't exactly recall. It was probably about something at work, or maybe it was about that new dumpling place he wanted to take you out to this weekend. Whatever it was, the details were blurred all around the edges, and you find yourself flickering in and out of a state of peaceful bliss as the warm, afternoon breeze settles around the two of you.

The feeling of his hand carding through your hair isn't helping at all, too.

Your head is laying on his lap, your legs sprawled out lazily on a picnic blanket in the middle of this small park you frequent at, the air carrying the scent of freshly cut grass and pine all around you. Rays of sunlight dapple through the leaves of the enormous tree looming above, painting patterns and shapes of warmth on your skin.

You can feel your eyelids getting heavier by the minutes that pass, and fighting the urge to fall asleep right then and there is becoming harder and harder. But you can't help it𑁋not when Seungkwan is practically feeding into the urge, with his voice that is somehow a natural lullaby and his fingers gently massaging your scalp.

"...and when I tell you he literally tripped on his shoelaces during practice! We all couldn't stop laughing! Oh my gosh, baby, you should've been there. He had to practice the dance shoeless since his laces were all tangled…”

You manage to crack an eye open to look at Seungkwan, seeing that his gaze is out towards the distant pond as he continues to ramble animatedly, strands of his hair getting caught in the breeze.

You love it when he talks; he always seems so happy when he does. And you could listen to him go on and on, especially about things that make his eyes crinkle at the corners like that and his nose scrunching to fight off a laugh.

There's a sleepy, incoherent mumble that leaves your lips. Your eyes flutter back to a close, the world slowly closing in around you, and the sound of Seungkwan's voice fading into a warm, comforting hum.

"Okay, but remember that pizza place down a few blocks from our place? I heard it also got revamped into this new boba café, so I would totally be down to go there right after we..."

The moment Seungkwan's eyes fall back down to you, he shuts his mouth right away, and it hardly takes a second for his chest to suddenly feel so full of adoration that threatens to spill over the rim of his heart. His lips purse together before melting into a soft smile at the sight of you looking so peaceful right under his nose.

"Gosh, do my stories bore you that much?" he asks jokingly, yet carefully to not wake you.

He continues to peer down at you, huffing out a quiet sigh of contentment. You just look so soft right now, with your mouth parted slightly and your chest rising and falling rhythmically with each breath that leaves you. When a single strand of hair tickles upon your cheek, Seungkwan brushes it away lightly with his thumb.

He leans back on his hands, a subtle pout forming at his mouth.

"You're so pretty, you know that?" Seungkwan says, tilting his head to the sight to get a better look at you. "How in the world did I get so lucky?"

His fingers toy gently with the fabric of your shirt as he lets a few moments of silence roll through. The corners of your mouth seem to twitch at his touch, and he swears some sort of sleepy grin appears at your face. But then your lips drift back apart in a soft sigh.

Seungkwan lets out a sudden exhale he's been holding in.

"But then you always say something about how we were both lucky that we met each other," he continues on. "and while yeah, that may be true. I just... I can't help but think I'm the luckier one, because you're you, and if someone were to think they weren't lucky to have you in their life, then they're stupid."

His eyes continue to wander from you and out towards the sky, watching the sun beginning to set across the horizon.

"Do you... ever think about the future?" Seungkwan asks almost hesitantly, voice lowering a smidge at the vulnerability cracking through. "I know you hate thinking about it. But when you think of me... if you think of me being there with you, does it, um... make it feel less scary?"

He wants to mentally facepalm himself for wording it like that, or for asking it in general. Yet the question seemed to have been burning a hole through his tongue for a while now, and it's all deciding to tumble out.

Seungkwan leans down again, brushing another stray hair from your forehead. The remnants of the setting sun cast an orange glow on your features, making you look even more ethereal than usual.

"It's definitely not as scary when I think about it, because... you're in it." He chuckles to himself at how absolutely cheesy that sounded. "Could you imagine our house together? I know you've always wanted a bigger bed for all your stuffed animals and a bookshelf for your books. We could even paint the walls that colour you showed me on Pinterest the other day..."

The thought of one day having an entire house for just the two of you makes his cheeks burn with anticipation, like he's watching it all unfold in his mind. He knows he's imagining way farther ahead than ever before, but the future suddenly feels so easy and possible with you by his side.

Seungkwan steals another careful glance at you, as if he's waiting for an answer he knows he probably won't hear. When the silence starts to feel heavy, he sucks in another deep breath.

"I just hope that wherever you'll be in ten, twenty years from now... that you're happy," he says. "and that maybe, just maybe, you'll be happy with me, if you wanted to, of course."

As the uncertainty lingers in the air, the sound of gravel cracking snaps his attention away for a second. Seungkwan turns his head to catch the sight of a nearby family walking by, their laughter mingling with the gentle rustle of leaves. A ghost of a smile touches his lips as he watches them, the warmth in his chest spreading throughout his body. Then he glances back down at you, and his smile hardly wavers.

When his hands drift from your hair, you stir slightly, eyelids fluttering open a fraction. The world slowly but surely comes back into focus, and you feel yourself stretch your legs out. Tilting your head slightly, you meet Seungkwan's gaze towards you.

"Well, hello, sleeping beauty," he remarks teasingly, poking a finger at your nose. "You fell asleep on me."

You sit up from his lap, rubbing at your eyes sleepily. "Did I? Sorry."

"It's okay," Seungkwan reassures, already reaching back for your hand. "You looked cute, anyway."

You let out a scoff at that, but the heat creeping up your neck is hard to ignore. "Whatever, did I miss anything important?"

Seungkwan hesitates for a second, then shakes his head.

"Nope, nothing much," he answers. "Just talking about work and oh! The new dumpling place. Yeah, we're going there this weekend, and then stop by a new little boba café too."

The way your eyes seem to literally light up has Seungkwan grinning like a goofball.

"Oh, you are going to regret telling me about that, Mr. Boo," You threaten playfully, wiggling a finger in his direction.

Seungkwan just throws his head back and laughs, before reaching over to grab your hand into his. A yawn escapes you.

"We should probably head home now," he says, giving your hand a soft squeeze before standing up.

You follow suit, helping him pack up the picnic blanket and other belongings that the two of you brought together. And on the way back to the car, you nudge him lightly on the arm with a finger.

"Are you sure I didn't miss anything important? I must have knocked out for a bit, you know..."

Seungkwan bites at his bottom lip sheepishly. "It was something stupid."

"Come on. Whatever you say isn't stupid," You coax lightly. "I love listening to you."

He perks up at that, lifting a brow. "You... do?"

"Of course I do."

"But you fell asleep𑁋"

"Okay, the position was too comfortable," You insist hastily. "and your voice is really nice to listen to. I'm wide awake now, I swear."

Seungkwan only pauses for a few moments, a bashful look at his face. He can feel the vulnerability seeping through again, despite knowing that it's completely okay to be vulnerable, especially with you. But he'd rather say it all when the two of you are in a more comfortable... environment.

"I'll tell you at home, okay?" He presses a small kiss to your cheek. "I promise."

And when he turns away from you, you gaze down at the ground, feeling the corners of your mouth tugging back upwards.

Oh, you can't wait to hear him say all that again.

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[anantaru]

— their favorite form of pda (public display of affection)

including dan heng, blade, jing yuan, luocha, sampo, gepard, welt x gn! reader

꒰ genre ꒱ — fluff, crack, very sweet n cute

when it comes to dan heng, he, for one part, enjoys less than more— you can catch him quietly patting your back whenever you‘re doing something, or on any occasion you'd meet up with your boyfriend, he'd make himself visible by kissing your cheek. it's rarely your lips when people were close by, yet if it was someone he considered a friend as well, dan heng did not mind smooching your lips for a short while. by all odds, he was observant of the current setting he found himself in and he waits long enough to relocate the vibes and go with them. it's also worth to note that dan heng would never attempt to do something to make you uncomfortable, he was a patient man, marking time and pausing to identify any discomfort.

notably enough, blade thinks it‘s cute, no scrap that, doubtlessly ambrosial when he notices how you're waiting for it to happen— howbeit, you‘re sneakily inching a square near his body so he can as a matter of course swathe his broad arm around your shoulders and leave it there to be tumbling around you. all the same example was blade expecting you to do the same and encircle him back. briefly, you will remain in a flowing setting and be fond of the exchanged heaves of air when you‘re slowing yourself into his chest— because fundamentally speaking, there has been nothing that had a more tranquil stifling on you then listening to blade's heart-beats.

as one clearly might’ve made an estimate thus far, jing yuan needs you to be as sheltered as possible against his immersing cradle. your boyfriend evidently does not want to unintentionally overstep any boundaries with you and makes it his own personal responsibility to be an eager listener while also hugely monitoring when he senses it‘s okay to approach you a tad closer. as a general rule, the subdued signaling will wind up with jing yuan listlessly planting his palm on your lower back whenever you walk into, well, really anywhere; a fine scented flower shop was only one of such. greater yet— the man was a gentleman, opening the door for you and silently swaying his large hand up and down your back to voicelessly tell you that, yes indeed, he was present and there's nothing for you to worry about.

the fetching and enticing luocha who, in his immediate brilliance, had a charming practice of turning relatively flustered, cheeks swelled up whenever he thought about it— all in all, what in the eyes of his significant other was too much or too little, all your boyfriend wanted to proudly achieve was to hit that spotless middle and make you doubtlessly happy in the process. he coughs, managing to get his hand towards your lower arm before exhaling softly, it's done now, he realizes, lips twitching in the process when you're amusedly watching him fold, "this is awkward, don't you think?" you giggle, pointing towards the comical picture of luocha holding onto you— significantly resembling a child holding onto their parent in a grocery store. "lets try this instead." above you, you see a man with a blush on his handsome features, leaning into whatever you say as you effortlessly slip your fingers and tangle them into his own.

how would you, individualistically, describe your boyfriend sampo koski? by fair means, it was impossible, unthinkably out of the question. you often find yourself quite surprised and baffled on how fickle and unpredictable he appeared to be. wether it had been sampo suddenly grabbing a stern hold of your hand to twirl you around in front of everyone or him swiftly cutting you off mid speech to place a kiss on your parted lips. 'i felt like it', he says proudly, with that damned smirk caked around the sharp edges of his mouth, but 'i needs more' sampo will add on, only then he'll shut up in a satisfied bliss and let you carry on with the topic you had been rambling about to him.

you sometimes wonder if the general and your personal protector gepard could turn even cuter— the hint of a full shaded blush on his cheeks as he averts his gaze and nervously coughs into his hand. but do not get fooled, he cannot possibly help himself, it's not like he will ever get used to you agreeing to the silent, little flushed request of gepard longing to hold your hand. be it known throughout entire spaces, he certainly does not stop here, what held gepard's mind locked behind heart shaped clouds, was when you'd visit him at work sometimes— undeniably when he wasn't busy for once; the unwavering courage, as he referred to it, for you to smirkingly place a subtle kiss on his burning lips after encountering him was indescribable for the man, and this craving he went through now had become like an infinite road— forever, he hopes, you'd show him more of that flickering kindness, the one that had lifted any burdens off his soul.

upwardly subtle and efficiently sophisticated— the very two turns of phrases that would adequately describe welt‘s usual approach on you. if he had to speak out more clear to a subject such as pda, which he does more than you'd sometimes like to admit, he was personally not all too bothered nor interested on it. distinctly, it's not like he found any particular distaste in it, he simply has not spent any time going over it alone more sufficiently. in a clearer way did he not view it as something holding a significant importance in your relationship. but, from time to time, he too catches himself fall into it, especially when you‘re inviting him with open arms surrounded by precious friends and colleagues, awaiting a passion infused hug welt always did justice to.

©2023 anantaru do not repost, copy, translate, modify

[onelonelysaiyan]

Hazbin Hotel Adam Relationship Headcanons

Fairly gn, i tried my best! This is kind of my starting point for getting back into writing, let me know what you guys think! <3

-DAD BOD!!!!! You CANNOT change my mind on this 

-Hairy arms, legs, a little on his chest, has a really nice happy trail 

-Strong arms, good at cuddling  

-Uses wings a lot in his body language 

-Enjoys when you preen his wings, makes him feel loved 

-Tries to be less rude and mean when talking to you 

-LOTS of petnames; Angel, babe, baby, mommy/daddy, sugartits, sweetie, sweetheart, sugar, dollface, wifey/husband

-Super clingy, like, to an obsessive extent sometimes. Will get upset if you’re not spending enough time (in other words, all of your time) with him. Calls you all day if you’re apart, will text if you tell him to stop calling. Has to know where you are, who you’re with, if you’re safe. Has absolutely spied on you before, and has made poor Lute follow you around on numerous occasions. He just wants to make sure you’re alright!  

-Big Baby. He’s so whiny and needy, please coddle him. Not in public, but like when you’re alone just hold him and run your fingers through his hair. Kiss his forehead. Hold his hands. Let him rest his head on your chest, he needs it 

-PDA is his thing, but in general his love language is touch so expect lots of physical contact ALL the time unless you just really don’t like that kind of thing 

-Absolute tease, doesn’t matter where you are. Love to rile you up even if he’s not looking for anything to happen afterward. Just likes seeing your red face 

-Will talk to/at you for HOURS, about literally anything and everything. Like please, babe, just shut up for like, five seconds? 

-KISS HIM WHEN HE’S RAMBLING. Shut this asshole up with the sweetest way you know, he’ll fall for you all over again 

-Honestly just kiss him, any time will do. Might act a little upset if he’s in the middle of a sentence but he loves it, please kiss him more 

-Likes to spend the rare day off by laying in bed with you and just holding you, all lazy kisses and gently roaming hands while you lay on his chest 

-Give him chest kisses!!! Especially over his heart, practically melts when you do, it’s just so sweet and intimate to him and he feels so loved when you do 

-Loves to play with your hair, long or short. Sometimes tangles it on accident, but he’s willing to brush it back out for you if you’ll let him 

-Will just stare at you sometimes, he’s so in love. He wants to make sure he commits every detail of your beauty to memory, even if he’s already done so numerous times before. 

-Will absolutely adore it if you train with him and his exorcists, even if you can’t always keep up. You’re trying and it’s cute as hell 

-Will brag about you to anyone and everyone. Can be rather inappropriate about it, but he really can’t help it! He wants everyone to know how perfect you are and how you chose him out of everyone.

-Possessive, can’t stand seeing others trying to flirt with you. He understands why they would, after all, you’re the hottest being in Heaven! Who wouldn’t want you? But he still doesn’t appreciate it. Will march up to you and the other person before wrapping his arms around you and fluffing out his wings to make himself seem bigger (which really isn’t necessary, the man’s an absolute GIANT already...) 

-Speaking of being a giant, this man loves to engulf you with his body. He’s just so big that no matter what size you are he practically swallows you whole when he holds you. Thinks it’s super cute how small you are compared to him 

-Plays his guitar for you a lot, loves to sing for you too. Will make you attend band practice to get your approval of new songs and honestly just so he can see you while he plays. Gives him an ego boost to see you cheering him on both in practice and at shows and he’s certain he sounds better when he knows you’re there watching

I've got a fair few NSFW headcanons too so let me know if that's something y'all would be interested in!

[sl-ut]

ceilings

pairing: ellie williams x fem!reader

description: ellie and y/n are together when they’re in private, but she’s not sure if she’s ready to be with her in public. A newcomer to jackson might be the shove that she needs to decide whether she really wants her or not.

warnings: UNEDITED!!! slight hint of smut, reader has a bad rep, reader is a lil slutty (in a fun way), mentions of bad parenting, slightly mean!ellie, jealousy

words: 4.8K

date posted: 08/06/23

part two

Early morning patrol was going to kill Ellie someday, that she was sure of. The urge to stay in bed all day only worsened as the wind grew increasingly bitter with the oncoming winter. More often than not, she would be paired with Jesse or Dina, who both took their time apart to use Ellie as their unpaid therapist. At that point, she would almost rather have tense smalltalk with Joel or even suffer through Eugene’s ramblings–at least Eugene almost always brought weed to share between them. Plus, waking up before the sun had even risen halfway into the sky was easily one of her least favourite things to do, and her thighs were always sore after riding all day, no matter how often she was on horseback. 

The only thing that made it even worse in the more recent weeks, was that she found it so hard to drag herself out of bed while knowing who was still tucked into the numerous blankets. 

She made an effort to wake up early every morning, turning over as slowly as she could manage in hopes of not disturbing the slumbering figure behind her, settling onto her side as her fingers itched to reach out and feel the smooth flesh beneath the hem of her shirt. In such close proximity, she was able to feel the warmth of her body, blistering beneath the mountain of blankets. The girl was curled onto her side, shoulders rising and falling with every deep breath that escaped her parted lips. Before noticing her own movement, Ellie’s fingertips stroked against the softness of her warm cheek, stroking the sleep-swollen flesh in admiration with slow, gentle movements until the girl’s long eyelashes began to flutter. 

Y/n blinked a few times as she pushed through the grogginess, a dopey grin crossing her features sleepily as her eyes fell on the figure next to her. She tugged the blankets in closer to her chin as she readjusted her head on the pillow, smacking her lips a few times before mumbling out a warm ‘mornin’’.

“Sorry,” Ellie hurriedly pulled her fingers away, “Didn’t mean to wake you.”

“‘S okay,” Y/n yawned, “I don’t mind waking up next to you.”

Ellie flushed, chest burning with the desire to snuggle so close to the girl that they became fused together. Her fingers moved down, searching blindly beneath the blankets in search of Y/n’s own hand, and tangling them together tightly.

The night before had felt unreal. Ellie had invited Y/n over, having made sure that they would be uninterrupted, to watch a movie on the shitty little box TV that she had brought out to her garage. In the dim lighting of the battery-operated lantern in the corner and the flickering TV, Ellie had admired Y/n’s features up-close in a way that she yearned to on a much more regular basis. The night had, of course, ended with Ellie tripping over her own feet in excitement as she was leading Y/n to her bed, wandering hands finally finding their purchase beneath the covers. 

Things had been that way for a while now. Ellie had known Y/n from a distance for quite some time before they started seeing each other, but hadn’t truly gotten to know her beyond a few things until Dina and Jesse ditched her at the Tipsy Bison in favour of Jesse’s bed. The two girls had a short conversation that night, and their relationship quickly snowballed from there. Small talk quickly turned into stolen kisses, and kisses turned into experimental touches–though it was always in private.

“I have to go soon,” Ellie whispered to her, “Patrol.”

Y/n let out a quiet groan, “Just skip today, I’ll do the same. Let’s just stay in bed all day.”

A small huff of a laugh escaped Ellie and she rolled her eyes, “Yeah, and risk us both being skinned alive by Maria?”

The girl shrugged lazily, shifting a tad closer to Ellie and nudging at her nose with her own playfully, “I can make it worth your while…”

Ellie’s fingers twitched, a knowing smirk crossing her dry lips, “Yeah? And how’s that?”

“Well, I was thinking…” She lowered her voice, as if they weren’t completely alone in the privacy of Ellie’s renovated garage, “I could get on top of you, and, you know…”

“I’m listening,” Ellie prompted her to continue with a wolfish grin.

“Well, I would get on top of you, get nice and close,” she giggled, “and then we could go back to sleep for a few hours.”

Ellie chuckled, pinching at her side playfully, “I should’ve known you were full of it when you said you would get on top.”

Y/n scoffed, swatting at her as she cackled at her own joke, “Uh, excuse me! I would get on top if you would let me!”

“Oh please, you wouldn’t even know what to do.”

“You wanna bet?” Y/n wasted no time in crawling on top of the brunette, grasping at her wrists and pinning them above her head with as much strength as she could manage, “What do you think of that, huh?”

Ellie’s eyes dropped from Y/n’s own to her lips, then down to the plush of her thighs from beneath the large shirt that she had worn to bed. She could feel the warmth of her centre through the thin fabric of her panties against the firm expanse of her abdomen, and she could make out the shape of her breasts through the worn fabric of her shirt. Her breath caught in her throat at the intimate position, fingers stretching out as she gauged how difficult it would be to break her hold. 

“I think you’re in over your head. You’re nothing but a little pillow princess, aren’t you?”

Y/n pouted, shaking her head in defiance as she bent down further to ghost her lips over Ellie’s before finally dropping them together in a firm kiss. Slowly, she began to rotate her hips against her, mewling against her lips excitedly and easily becoming overwhelmed at the slightest of touches.

Ellie took the opportunity handed to her, wrenching her hands free and manoeuvring herself to be propped up against her pillows while grasping Y/n’s hips in her strong hands while forcing them to continue on with her movements. Y/n shrieked in surprise at the jostling movement, but didn’t fight Ellie’s clear show of dominance and allowed the girl to guide her hips in grinding down against her abs. 

Small gasps fell from her lips as she urged Ellie to let her go faster, their lips moulding together to a series of sloppy kisses.

“See?” Ellie panted as their lips separated for air, “You can be on top all you want, but you’ll never be in control.”

Y/n moaned as the sensation of cotton rubbing against her sensitive bundle of nerves, the contours of Ellie’s abdomen acting as the perfect surface for her pleasure, murmuring out little incoherent sentences under her breath–a result of both the warm feeling that had begun to pool in her belly and the sheer exhaustion that still gnawed at her brain. Ellie whispered little praises to her, watching impatiently as her face scrunched up with every movement of her hips.

Her peak was torn away as a knock sounded on the door, Y/n finding herself falling face-first into the mattress as Ellie pushed her away as if she had burned her, tossing the blankets over Y/n’s body as the door swung open.

Y/n peeled the blankets off of her face, scowling at her unofficial girlfriend for throwing her to the side so haphazardly, though Ellie hadn’t even spared her a glance as she rushed out of bed and towards the door.

“Yo, Ellie!” Jesse marched straight in after knocking only once, “We’re gonna be late if you don’t drag your ass outta–oh.”

His gaze had quickly shifted past his friend’s alarmed expression to the flushed figure in her bed, a knowing look crossing his embarrassed features. 

“Jesse, what the fuck man?”

“Sorry,” He flickered his eyes to Ellie, not wanting to let his gaze linger on the half-dressed girl longer than necessary, “We’ve got patrol, so I guess I’ll just, uh, wait outside.” He paused at the door for a final remark before closing it behind him, “Hi, Y/n.”

Ellie dropped her head in embarrassment, hands on her hips as she shook her head, “Fuck.”

Y/n crawled out of the bed, cringing as her bare feet met the cold floor. Her fingers reached for Ellie’s back, barely ghosting her spine before the brunette ripped herself away, rushing around the room to collect her things.

“Hey,” Y/n called out to her, “I know you’re probably embarrassed over that, but it’s okay. I mean, he didn’t really see anything, but–”

“Yeah, well I’m pretty sure he’s not dumb enough to not figure out what we were doing,” Ellie remarked as she slid her jeans up over her thighs.

“It’s not the end of the world, now is it? I mean, you know what he’s doing when he and Dina sneak off, right? What’s the difference?”

“Difference is that I know that he and Dina are dating. This isn’t exactly something that I planned on telling people about.”

The blood drained from Y/n’s face, “Oh my God, Ellie. Are you not… I had no idea that you weren’t, you know, out to everyone. I’m so sorry, I would have taken it more seriously if I–”

“What?” Ellie scrunched her face up, “Are you kidding me? I dated Cat, everyone knows that I like girls.”

Y/n paused, the sinking feeling in her stomach returning, only significantly worse than before, “So, you weren’t planning on telling people about me?”

Ellie stood up from lacing up her boots, turning to shrug into her jacket and backpack quickly as she turned back to face Y/n with a sigh. Her shoulders dropped as she took in the wide, teary eyes of the girl she had been quite intimately embracing only moments before, “Jesus, I don’t have time to deal with this right now, ‘kay? We’ll talk when I get back.”

Ellie disappeared out the door without another word or glance, leaving Y/n to collect her things and flee back to her own home. 

* * *

Jackson was not a very big community,meaning that Ellie had come to know who most people were within the first three weeks of her and Joel settling into Jackson for good. Seth was a cranky old asshole, Big Frankie had a bad temper, and Jennifer was cheating on her husband with his brother, only he was too blind to see it. Joel wasn’t exactly one for gossip, so she did her best to follow by example and ignore the kinds of reputations that people held until she could judge for herself. That was until she met Dina.

Dina was the kind of girl who people aimed to please. Generally everyone was instantly drawn to her; pretty, smart, and confident, the kind of girl that everyone wanted to be or wanted to be with. She was the first person that Ellie seemed to actually click with, so of course she was willing to hear and trust her opinion of other Jackson locals. With older people, the general consensus was that they were either nice or absolute dicks with no in between, though things were much more complicated with people closer to their own age. 

There was a clear social hierarchy among the Jackson youths. Dina, of course, was among the top of this status quo, and had very strict opinions of those who she personally did not like. There were a handful of people who Dina wasn’t the biggest fan of, but there was no one else in Jackson that Dina seemed to dislike more than Y/n, though she was never very open about exactly why she didn’t like her, beyond several petty comments or calling her mean names when she passed by with a smile. Jesse had even let it slip one night just before greening out that Dina had once been friends with the girl, but was too out of it to tell her anything else.

Ellie decided that anyone who could have caused such hatred in Dina must have been the scum of the earth, and that it was in the best interest of herself and the relationship that she had with Dina to take up similar opinions, though she still couldn’t quite figure out how that kind of dreadful personality could exist within such a cheerful facade. Of course, Ellie was aware of the reputation that she had around town, and she had taken notice of how she seemed to hang around with different guys every few weeks, but did that necessarily mean that she was an awful person? She had also seen the way that she interacted with others around town, and had heard from Maria how sweet she was with the dogs when she worked at the kennels–things just weren’t adding up. 

When she asked Dina, she was quite vague about the actual issue that she had with the girl, instead choosing to explain why Ellie shouldn’t like her. 

“She’s slept with half the guys in Jackson, and tried with the other half. Guess they weren’t desperate enough to stoop to that level.” Dina had scowled, “Plus she’s such an airhead. Like, I figured that people nowadays needed to have some kind of common sense, but jeez.”

To be quite honest, Y/n was one of the first people who she had taken explicit notice of in Jackson, aside from Tommy and Maria, of course. She was the kind of girl that Ellie just couldn’t look away from, and always seemed to have a peaceful and soft aura about her. Whenever they happened to run into each other, she always greeted her with a smile and a soft hello, only to turn beet red and retreat when Dina came sidling up beside her. Whenever they were both at the Tipsy Bison, Ellie’s eyes couldn’t stop themselves from following her movements, internally cringing as she watched guys run their hands over her body and pulling a boisterous laugh out of her. 

“Can’t believe Keith is the guy of the week,” Dina raised her brows at the sound of the obnoxious giggling.

Jesse shrugged, keeping a neutral position that would only prove to piss his girlfriend off even more, “He’s a nice guy. Seems to like her.”

She snorted, “They always seem to like her, until they get what they want. After that, I guess she lets people see the real her.”

Later on that night, Ellie did actually get to know the real her after Dina and Jesse pulled their infamous disappearing act, and she still couldn’t figure out what kind of person could be so awful under such a starkly opposite front. She quickly grew to like Y/n much more than she wanted to–she wanted to be a loyal friend, to hate the same people that Dina did, but she simply couldn’t bring herself to. But what Dina didn’t know wouldn’t hurt her, right?

It hadn’t seemed to be in the best interest of anyone to be open with her relationship with Y/n just yet. Dina would likely have given her the cold shoulder for God-knows how long, as she so often did with people, Jesse would have been forced to ignore her wherever possible, and Y/n would have faced some serious consequences from Dina and, by association, Jesse. 

Y/n had a reputation around Jackson, and it wasn’t as if Ellie was put off by it, but she couldn’t help but wonder if she was just the latest obsession and would soon be kicked to the curb. As much as she liked Y/n, she wasn’t sure if she was ready to risk losing Dina and Jesse if what they had was nothing more than a passing fling, so it only made sense that she hadn’t told them yet. Plus, that stupid grin on his face was enough of a reason not to tell them.

“Stop looking at me like that,” She drawled, trotting alongside him on Shimmer, “Seriously, I’ll punch that smug little smile right off your stupid face.”

Ellie was honestly surprised that he had contained it this long so far, waiting until they were a fair distance from Jackson to even prod at the questions he’s been dying to ask. 

“So…” Jesse paused, unsure of how to approach the conversation without being maimed by his best friend, “How long have you guys been… Are you together?”

“No,” She answered sharply, “We’re–I don’t know. A few weeks, I guess.”

“Honestly, I didn’t even think she liked girls. Does…anyone else know?”

Ellie rolled her eyes, “No, Jesse, Dina doesn’t know. She would probably kill me, which is why I didn’t tell you, and why you can’t tell her. Don’t bother asking anything else, ‘cause I’m not gonna tell you.”

Jesse grunted in response, nodding in silence for a few moments before he cleared his throat and leaned towards her ever so slightly as he muttered out his question.

“How is it?” He laughed at her incredulous expression, “What? It’s not like you can talk about this with anyone else, can you?”

She shook her head at him, turning her face away to keep her eyes on the path ahead of them, “I don’t–I mean…” Ellie sniffed, deciding to answer now rather than be bothered by him for the rest of patrol, “Yes, it is.”

Jesse howled in amusement, “Holy shit, you like like her, I can see it on your face.”

“I do not, I just–”

“You didn’t even look this smitten with Cat, and you were down bad for her too,” He continued, “So are you gonna ask her out?”

She shrugged in response.

“I don’t see why not. I mean, people talk, but she’s actually really nice, funny, not to mention that she’s like–”

“Don’t you dare finish that sentence,” Ellie pointed at him accusingly, “And you know why.”

“Because of Dina?” Jesse asked incredulously, “C’mon, don’t let her stop you from being happy. What happened between them, that’s like ancient history now, D will get over it.”

“Will she? I mean, she’s never even told me why she doesn’t like her.”

Jesse paused, almost as if he was unsure of how much he should actually reveal about the situation without betraying his girlfriend’s trust, “Listen, it’s really nothing. Just drama from when we were like thirteen, and you know that Dina can hold a grudge, but I really don’t think that she would be willing to just stop being friends with you because of it.”

Ellie shook her head once more, “Just forget it. This is supposed to be patrol, not therapy.” She chuckled at her own words, nudging at Shimmer to get her to pick up the pace and leaving Jesse in her dust.

***

The morning had progressed very slowly for Y/n. She had been left in quite a state; still frazzled from Ellie’s touches, while also distraught from her words. They hadn’t been very public about their relationship, if you could even call it that, but it hadn’t even occurred to Y/n that there might have been a reason behind the secrecy aside from Ellie’s preference to keep her life a bit more private. She knows that Ellie had been upset this morning, and she likely wouldn’t have said the things that she had otherwise, though that didn’t make it any better considering that she was upset because someone had seen them together.

Y/n knew what kind of reputation she had around Jackson. From a young age, she knew that she had issues with being alone–it terrified her to no end. Her father, while still doing the bare minimum, was not very present in her life beyond making sure that she was still breathing and punishing her for getting in trouble. Aside from that, he would have nothing to do with her, and more often than not, didn’t even spend the night in the same house as her. In truth, it would be more surprising if she hadn’t sought out comfort in others, and it was incredibly easy for her. 

The first boy she ever kissed was Frank Cahill, who was a year older than her and just happened to be there at the right moment. She had been crying to herself silently after a fight with her father, curling into herself on the front step of the empty house. Frank happened to be walking by and said the right words for her to fall so easily into his arms. 

From then on, Y/n fell in love with just about every guy she had ever been with. She needed companionship, and guys were willing to give it to her for the price of her body. The only issue being that not many stuck around afterwards, and some weren’t willing to “work for it” beyond what they deemed necessary, so she truthfully could not deny most of the rumours that had gone around about her. Of course, she wasn’t stupid and knew that many of these guys didn’t really like her, but those who were good enough at acting to trick her into believing their sweet whispers truly took a toll on her.

Which is why she was so caught off guard by Ellie’s treatment. Ellie had criticised the way that she allowed guys to treat her in the past, but made it clear to her that she didn’t think of her any differently because of it. If the embarrassment hadn’t been caused by the fact that she was a girl, it left her with no other reason other than that she was Y/n. Ellie was embarrassed to be seen with her, not because she wasn’t out yet, but because she didn’t want to be seen with Y/n in general. 

Ellie was the first girl that she had ever been with. In fact, she hadn’t even considered the fact that she might like girls until she found herself seeking Ellie out and eventually beginning to fall for her. She was different from the others, seeming to actually be interested in her as a person rather than just another warm body, and even after they had slept together for the first time, she still stuck around. She was the first person to make Y/n feel like she was worth more than what she actually believed, but their interaction during the early hours of the morning made her question whether Ellie was actually as trustworthy as she had believed her to be.

Her eyes were droopy as she brushed through the soft chestnut hair of what felt like the thousandth horse of the day. She hadn’t managed to fall back to sleep after returning to her own house and needed to be at the stables for her shift only a few hours later. She was dreading the fact that Ellie would soon be returning from her morning patrol and would be coming straight there to return Shimmer for the night. 

She glanced over her shoulder at the sound of her name being called, managing a cheerful smile as her eyes fell onto Maria’s figure, then onto the shy expression of the girl behind her. 

“Y/n, this is Erin, she and her brother are new around town. I figured that the stables would be a good place for her to start out, so would you mind giving her a little show around when you’re done here?”

Y/n turned to face the girl, taking in her short brown hair and cocoa skin. She smiled at her kindly, nodding to Maria before offering her a hand to shake. The pair had fallen into an easy conversation, giggling quietly together in the corner of the stables as Erin helped her finish grooming the remaining horses.

Y/n found Erin to be a welcome distraction, not even noticing when Ellie and Jesse returned their horses. 

Jesse glanced over at the two girls, then back to his friend, who’s eyes hadn’t left them since they had first set foot in the stables. 

“Who’s that?” She asked Steven as she handed Shimmer’s reins off to him, an uneasy feeling settling into the pit of her belly.

“New girl,” He shrugged, “Weird, though. Could barely get a word out of Y/n all morning before she showed up.”

Ellie sneered as Steven led Shimmer back to her stall, resisting the urge to march over to the pair and stake her claim–but what claim? To the public, Ellie and Y/n barely know one another. They may speak in passing, but there really shouldn’t be any reason for Ellie to feel jealous over Y/n getting along with someone else. This is what she wanted, isn’t it? She had been mortified when Jesse caught them together earlier that morning, so what could have possibly changed enough in the few hours that she was gone in order for her to feel so differently?

The brunette would never admit it, but it had actually felt quite nice to be able to talk about the time that she spent with Y/n to someone–it made it feel much more real, like something real could actually sprout from their late-night talks and stolen kisses. Perhaps Dina could grow to accept Y/n as her partner, though she was certain it would take quite a bit of time for that to happen. 

That dreamy image seemed to shatter as Ellie whipped around, marching out of the stables and leaving the two girls to themselves. 

***

The Tipsy Bison was usually busy on Saturdays, and this one was no different. It had been a full day since Ellie had last spoken to Y/n, unable to get over her own pride and jealousy to approach her while she had Erin at her side, which seemed to be just about all the time now. She was thankful for the opportunity to get to the bar with her friends, to drink until her problems seemed so miniscule that she could almost completely forget about them. 

But then she caught sight of Y/n tucked into a corner booth, sitting suspiciously close to an all-too-obvious Erin. The mixture of annoyance with Dina and Jesse, who seemed to be moments away from sneaking off, the jealousy, and the heat of the hard liquor in her veins had her fuming. 

“Oh my God,” Dina had sneered in judgement, “Looks like she burned through all the guys in Jackson too fast and switched teams. Watch out, Ellie, you might be next.”

Jesse and Ellie shared a knowing look over Dina’s head, his dark eyes silently asking if she was going to do anything about the new girl blatantly flirting with Y/n, while Ellie’s simply betrayed the burning rage inside of her. 

She saw her chance when Y/n got up to approach the bar, leaning her arms on the sticky bar top as she waited for Seth’s attention. Ellie sidled up alongside her, remaining a casual distance away from her as she barked out another drink order for herself. 

“So you and Erin, huh?” She mumbled, glancing at the girl out of the corner of her eye. 

“Sorry, are you talking to me?” Y/n looked around dramatically, hand rising to grasp at her own chest in shock, “Last I heard, you couldn’t be seen with me.”

“You know that’s not…what I meant.”

“No, how could I possibly know what you meant, Ellie? When one person saw us together and you suddenly didn’t want anything to do with me, what else was I supposed to think?”

She shrugged, “I don’t–”

“And Erin’s just a friend, by the way.”

Ellie chuckled humorlessly, “You’ve gotta be stupid to not see how into you she is.”

Y/n shook her head, “You know, that’s the second time you’ve called me dumb in the last two days, Ellie. And so what if she likes me? Honestly, it’s kinda nice to–” she paused, choking on a sudden onset of tears. She shook her head, refusing to allow her own emotions to spill out with Ellie present, “It’s nice to be around someone who’s not embarrassed to be seen with me.”

As if on cue, Seth placed the two drinks down in front of Y/n, allowing her to snatch them away from him and flee before Ellie could even think of a response. 

[letternotekisses]

Ouuurghhhh Ramattra hate sex ourghhhhh 😫😫

He fucks you like he hates you because secretly he doesn’t.

There's little love in the way Ramattra takes you, leaving bruises and scrapes along your soft flesh because of his heavy handedness and the desperate need he has to convince himself that this is just for your mutually assured stress relief.

It's almost pathetic of him really - bending you into all sorts of positions and watching how much it takes for your fleshy body to give in and let him inside - all because of a few feelings he wasn't brave enough to face up to. Yet even after every time you still return for more, truly a glutton for punishment.

Or maybe you were just like him. Two points of time at a devastatingly slow standstill. Mixed up mirrors of one another, tangled in something equally sweet and sickening he'd spent many a night fixated on.

As the days go on he learns to treat you a little differently. You are smaller, delicate - human, putting your life in his hands in a manner of trust he surely wouldn't hand over to anyone else. Ramattra could crumble you beneath the creaking of his fingers but he wouldn't, he couldn't - and it would enrage him to see anyone else even entertain the idea.

It sours him more to think that he belongs to you just as much as you do to him, and Ramattra shows it to you in the only way he knows how - by grabbing the fat of your hip too hard when he brings you down onto the girthy silicone standing deplorably between his gigantic legs, leaving aching bruises to mask the utter shame of his excitability.

And yet you cry for more, meek mewls and sheer rambling nonsense to spur him on as he splits you open, carving a place for himself deep inside you despite what common sense may seem to scream at him.

Whatever it is that he really feels, said gigantic, terrifying omnic isn't quite ready to face it yet. To face you and the cruel mimic of love you'd plagued him with.

Only, there's no mimic and that just might be what scares him the most.

[darlingdaisyfarm]

fidds and reader newly wed headcanons?? maybe how the dynamic changes after being married, OwO im feral over that man I cant help myself (im so sorry emma-may 😔)

♡˚· fiddleford x reader newlyweds headcanons ·˚♡

a/n: a little bit nervous because ive never written him before, but he's such a sweetheart! i got some reqs for him, so expect more Fiddleford fics <3 (especially that ford x reader x fidds one ohh)

୨ৎ the first morning after the wedding you both wake up and realise you’re actually married now. it hits differently. you’re just lying tangled in sheets and he looks over at you all goofy-eyed, he’s not entirely sure how to start the day now that you’re his forever. so, naturally, he presses a kiss to your forehead and says something ridiculous like, “well, darlin’, guess we don’t gotta pretend anymore. you’re mine now.”

୨ৎ honestly, he thrives on the idea of being your husband. his heart beats faster whenever you call him “my husband,” and you’ll catch him grinning like a fool, no matter how much he tries to hide it

୨ৎ when he’s proud of you ohhh, boy he’ll tell everyone. “did I mention my partner just finished this big project? oh, you gotta see it, they’re a genius! ABSOLUTE genius! smarter than me, even!”

୨ৎ he's still awkward, so awkward. before, he had his own world of gadgets and mysteries, but now, you are the new mystery. his brain goes into overdrive at the simplest things, for example when you call him “honey” or leave him little notes around the house, doesn't matter how silly, it melts him. you might find him randomly fixing stuff around the house, but he's also sneaking glances at you, totally lost in his new reality of "oh, wow, this is MY person now." honestly, he gets all shy around you, still a little clumsy, but he loves you so much. when he tries to give you something he made, his hands shake a bit

୨ৎ he’s touchier after marriage. he was always affectionate, but now he does it ALWAYS. he’ll wrap his arms around your waist while you’re cooking, press his nose into your hair when you’re reading, fall asleep holding your hand. he’s yours now, and he wants to remind you of that every single second

୨ৎ after the wedding, Fidds is lowkey obsessed with documenting every little thing about married life (because he still can't believe he married such beautiful person like you). if you both take a walk through the woods, he’ll bring out his old camera, snap a photo, and get all sentimental about it. "i reckon this here’s the first time we’ve taken a walk together as a married couple. gotta remember this moment.” expect a scrapbook of your married life by next week

୨ৎ your wedding bands become a point of obsession for him. he’s constantly fiddling with his ring, twisting it around his finger and grinning every time he catches a glimpse of yours. “still can’t believe it,” he’ll say, holding your hand and running his thumb over the metal. “we’re really married. that's. . . wow.”

୨ৎ when you gently wipe grease off his cheek after he’s been tinkering for hours, he just stops, blinks at you. he’s trying not to cry. he fails

୨ৎ if you'll kiss him first (usually it happens when hes rambling about some invention), so you just kiss him mid-sentence, he freezes for a second, hovering his hands in the air, not knowing what to do, before melting into it, kissing you back with this little laugh. he loves the fact that you’re so open with your affection, he’s a big softie in disguise.

୨ৎ speaking of coffee, he steals sips of yours all the time, because “yours just tastes better, somehow”

୨ৎ your own inside jokes have blossomed since you married. Fidds can make a random reference about something that happened years ago and you’ll both burst into laughter

୨ৎ when you’re doing something productive, like working on a project or focusing on a task, Fidds likes to be near you. he can be just tinkering with his own creations, but he’ll make sure to peek at your work every now and then, and give you the most proud smile. “look at you, my little genius,” he’ll say, completely unaware that his compliments are giving you butterflies

୨ৎ shopping trips together!! he’s just so excited by the smallest things. he’ll find a weird gadget and be like, “hoo boy, look at this! can we get it? what if we used this for the house? or better yet, for our projects??” and just like that you’re leaving with random junk, this guy is obsessed with collecting anything that could possibly make your life together more fun

୨ৎ married life and science is a whole thing now. Fidds will tell you about new experiments, and instead of just nodding along, you end up helping out, usually in the form of holding things while he gets super excited. you’re his sounding board for crazy ideas. he looks at you as if you’ve just solved the world’s biggest mystery when you suggest something small, “hey Fidds what if we tried using duct tape for that?” you’re the reason his inventions have a chance at working

୨ৎ Fidds is an inventor, but he’s also a man who shows love in action. if you’re tired from work or a long day, he’s the one finding the blanket, making sure your feet are propped up and bringing you whatever snacks he can find in the fridge

୨ৎ one day, after a particularly frustrating project Fidds will come to you looking all defeated and will sit down on the couch, burying his face in his hands. and in that moment, you just get it. you sit beside him, silently handing him a cup of tea (you know he needs it) and just let him have a moment. sometimes that’s the thing he needs most. hes such a sad puppy though

୨ৎ also, spontaneous bursts of affection have become a thing. ehehehe he’ll walk in the door, glance at you, and before you know it, he’s spun you around for a hug like you’ve been apart for years. it’s never just “hey,” it’s always “there you are!!” you’ll be sitting on the couch watching TV, and suddenly he’ll kiss your temple without warning and murmur, “couldn’t imagine life without you, baby.” and then he goes back to his tools like it was nothing

୨ৎ arguments are rare, but when they do happen, he always apologizes first and his sincerity makes it impossible to stay mad at him for long

୨ৎ suddenly, every little thing becomes a team project. you’re cleaning up the attic, and Fidds already running to you, “hold on, hold on, we can make this a fun thing!”

୨ৎ dates with him be like: stargazing on the roof, a picnic under the tree in the yard or walking around the weirdest, most obscure spots in town just because they’re “interesting” (and because it’s funny to him). but more than all its because you’re his favorite person to explore the world with, no matter how strange

୨ৎ late-night talks about dreams and what the future holds when you both lay there, staring at the ceiling, he’ll start talking about the life you’re going to build.

“i wanna grow old with you, sugar. like, I don’t even care where we live, as long as I get to wake up next to you every day.”

୨ৎ you show him love too, of course. when you catch him fiddling with some new idea, you’ll pull him away for a break and give him the softest kiss on the cheek, telling him how amazing he is. “you’re brilliant, you know that?” and his whole face lights up because you’ve given him the biggest compliment ever

୨ৎ when you both get out of the shower, dripping wet, he’ll always catch you in a hug, pressing you against him. he’ll nuzzle into your damp hair and kiss your temple, feeling the droplets between you both. ahh this man is so tender

୨ৎ romantic dinners at home are perfect. its not some fancy restaurant, you prefer to eat home-cooked meal that Fiddleford probably messed up, but it still tastes amazing because he made it with you in mind

୨ৎ after a long day of work, Fidds doesn’t just greet you at the door with a kiss, no, he prefers to pick you up, wrapping his arms around your waist and lifting you off the ground for a second as he spins you around in a dizzying, loving hug

୨ৎ sometimes he’ll just stare at you while you’re doing the most mundane thing, washing dishes, tying your shoe, whatever and then blurt out something like, “y'know, marryin’ you was the smartest thing I ever did.”

୨ৎ he’s the kind of guy who’ll pull you into a sudden, twirling hug just because he missed you while you were in the other room

୨ৎ Fiddleford is the most affectionate husband ever. this man’s idea of waking you up is to just cling to you, half asleep, rubbing his face into your hair. if you're a heavy sleeper, he’ll just nuzzle you with an adorable grunt and whisper, “i love you,”. he’s a bit of a morning cuddler, okay, maybe A LOT of a cuddler. you can't get away without some snuggles, not with this man.

୨ৎ he still blushes like it's the first time when you compliment him. especially loves when you say stuff as “you’re so smart, Fidds,” and he’ll literally hide his face in his hands. ("aw, shucks, don’t go makin’ me all red now…")

“cmon, darlin’. . . just five more minutes” as he clings to you like a koala. when he eventually gets up, he grumbles, almost falls out of bed, but always kisses you first trying to prolong the moment

୨ৎ cooking together, absolutely. Fiddford’s idea of cooking is throwing random ingredients into a pot and seeing what happens. loves experiments!! he gets real excited when he’s got you by his side, though.

୨ৎ there's probably some moments where he's way too deep in his work and forgets to take care of himself, but you’re there to remind him to drink water and maybe throw in some playful teasing (sometimes gets embarrassed about it, but also secretly so happy)

୨ৎ he loves going on random road trips with you! he's packing up in the car and driving nowhere in particular. he usually turns on the radio, and it’s either some classic country or him singing at the top of his lungs to songs. he’s terrible at directions, so you end up lost, but it’s okay, because you end up having the best spontaneous adventures!

୨ৎ tries to teach you how to fix one of his machines, but you keep getting distracted by how cute he looks explaining everything. eventually, he catches on and starts teasing you about it

୨ৎ will always try to make you laugh, even if his humor is as chaotic as his brain, “why don’t skeletons fight each other? they don’t have the guts!”

[wisterialagoon]

Hii, could you please do a smut with Yuta from jjk, where reader is really needy and constantly needing his affection!

YESSSS! I'm obsessed with that man rn frfr.

Warnings: Smut, cockwarming, unprotected sex (wrap it before you tap it) yuuta is a little condescending, kinda bimbo reader vibes.

Yuuta loved how needy you were, you were such a sweet little thing, constantly desperate for his attention.

You always needed some sort of skinship with him. Holding hands when you were out was a must, sleeping with your legs all tangled up, even during important meetings you'd be right by his side holding onto his hand, nobody bothers to protest it, afterall, he's too important.

But his favourite was always when you got needy during one of your regular movie nights. You were already clinging to his side but it wasn't enough, you needed more!

In a daze you began reaching for the waistband of his pj bottoms. He just chuckles, having already caught onto the signs that you needed him earlier on.

"Yuutaaa, need you, please," you whine, but he always liked to tease when you got like this. "I'm sorry gorgeous, I'm watching the film.

You pout up at him, letting out a pathetic whine. "Please Yuuta, need you here" you grab his hand and lead it inside the pajama shorts you put on. When his fingers brush against your bare cunt he has to hide his smirk behind the back of his hand.

"You're so needy aren't you," his fingers just barely brush against your clit before he's pulling his hand out your shorts. "If you need it that bad then you can cockwarm me until the film is over, but you're not allowed to move okay," he tucks your hair behind your ear gently.

Your eyes light up and you move to quickly pull him out of his pajama bottoms, reaching into his boxers. You make quick work of getting him hard and positioning yourself over him.

You quickly pull one leg out your shorts and sink down on him with no hesitation. The sudden stretch has you moaning into his shoulder while he strokes your hair.

"Got eager there huh? Didn't even ease yourself into it," he chuckles when you just moan in response.

As the movie goes on you find it impossible to stay still, you're trying to subtlety grind yourself again him, but he wordlessly grabs your hips holding you still. You groan in frustration.

You've only gotten through 30 more minutes of the movie and you're getting desperate.

Of course Yuuta already knew this, you were clenching down on him so hard that it was difficult for him to not just bend you over the coffee table and fuck you stupid.

Pretending to get comfortable, he bucks his hips up, hitting that exact spot that had you crying out. He holds you there, with his tip pressing right against your g-spot.

"Y-yuuta, pleaseee, need you to move," at this point, you're panting into his shoulder desperately. You try to grind against him again, making him groan out.

"Fuck, you're so desperate aren't ya?" He leans over, grabbing the remote to switch off the movie. Without warning, he then picks up your hips to drop you back down on his cock at a lightning pace.

You yelp out at the sudden change, but have no time to even process it, because he's now fucking you without mercy.

"Ahh, Yuuta!" you grip his shoulders, moaning uncontrollably. "F-feel so good," you try to match his pace with your hips.

"That's it pretty girl, you just needed my dick didn't you?" He coos softly into your ear.

"Yes! Yes I needed it so bad, feels so good, only you make me feel this good," you ramble mindlessly.

He brings his thumb down to rub quick circles on your clit and you practically keel over, biting into his shoulder, making him grunt.

"G'na come gorgeous? Go on, make a mess on my dick," he moans. As if waiting for his permission, you feel your orgasm crash into you like a freight train, screaming out his name.

The feeling of your orgasm has him following your lead, finishing inside of you with a deep moan of your name.

"Feel better gorgeous?" he smiles down at you. You simply nod, nuzzling your face into his neck.

"Go to sleep pretty, I'll get us cleaned up," he presses a sweet kiss to the top of your head.

Yes, Yuuta definitely loved how needy you were, just for him.

[pidgeispunk]

Pedro Pascal Character Headcannons — Cuddles.

Joel Miller:

Joel can’t help but want to protect you, he revels in the way you fit so perfectly into his arms, back pressed flush against his chest. One arm drapes lazily over your waist, hand finding your abdomen to keep you close. His calloused fingers draw small circles over the skin, slipping a hand underneath the fabric of your shirt. His other arm is occupied cushioning your head, outstretched for you to rest your head on. You’ll have one hand lifted to hold the hand on said arm, fiddling with his fingers as the two of you chat quietly about whatever. Your legs are tangled with his, at some point his hand will travel down and push you back until your hips are pressed into his, fully spooning you now. His head is either pushed into your neck from behind, nose against your exposed shoulder as he inhales the smell of you. Not your perfume or body spray, you. Occasionally he’ll rest his chin on top of your head, but he much prefers burying his face in your hair, trying to get as close as possible.

Javier Peña:

It took Javier a little while to get into the habit of cuddling with you while you slept. Usually he’d just have a hand in yours, eventually letting go of it as he fidgeted in his sleep. Once he had learnt he could really trust you, that you might just be the one, he was able to admit just how bad he wanted sleepy cuddles. He expressed his love for the way your head tucks under his chin when you lay on his chest, curled up at his side with an arm draped over his torso. His arm would most likely be around your shoulders, thumb digging into the knots he could find in your shoulder blades, earning sleepy groans from your lips. One of your legs would be tossed over his, knee up by his abdomen as his other hand happily takes place holding that thigh. Sometimes he even lets you sleep on his back, on particularly hot nights when all he can do is toss the duvet away. Lying on his front with his arms folded beneath his head, your head nestles between his shoulder blades.

Frankie Morales:

You knew Frankie was a fan of cuddles right away, just from the way he hugged you. The way he held the back of your head was mirrored when the two of you were tangled up in bed, letting you settle yourself nice and comfy right on top of him. Your legs rested either side of his body, arms tucked around his torso with your hands wedged between his back and the olive toned sheets. At first his hands would be holding the plush of your waist, thumbs rubbing back and forth as he told you about his day, finding himself rambling about his helicopter for god’s sake. Throughout the night you would slump into his body, head pushed into his neck as his hands moved to your back. One hand would settle at the small of your back, occasionally running up and down along your spine. His other hand would take to your hair, fingers carding through it as he let his nails lightly scratch at your scalp.

Din Djarin:

Din wasn’t too big on cuddles, the times you slept together started as each of you just lying on your own sides on the bed. However, it eventually turned to something much more intimate, and vulnerable. Din relished in you being the big spoon, the way you would croon your head down to settle over his shoulder, sometimes pressing kisses to his bare back and scarred shoulder blades. Your arm would undoubtedly be around his waist, and you soon found he would always seek out your hand during the night. He’d lace his fingers with yours, and pull your hand right up to his chest, to his heart. His other arm would stay tucked under his pillow, a favoured position since he was young.

Dieter Bravo:

Dieter is a big fan of cuddling. The moment you two get into bed he’s wriggling his way down and between your legs, settling his head comfortably against your abdomen. He doesn’t mind where your legs were, over his shoulders, splayed down beside his body, his hands would always find your thighs. Sometimes he’s on his front, head turned sideways on your abdomen as your fingers stroke down his neck, nails tracing over the slope of his shoulders. Other times he’s on his back, arms tucked under your thighs as he feels your fingers card through his fluffy hair, occasionally humming at the way you gently massage at his scalp.

Marcus Moreno:

Marcus always want to see your face, he likes the idea of falling asleep with your features fresh in his mind. However, he’ll probably end up tugging you closer by the waist, until your head settles in the crook of his neck and he’s able to wrap both arms around you. He doesn’t miss the way you slip a leg between his, your own arms folded at your chest between the two of your bodies. His head rests above yours, a perfect position for him to be able to press kisses to the top, letting his lips linger there for a moment. He’s even fallen asleep with his mouth pressed to your head once.

[mewnewew]

Sir Crocodile x Reader

I'll do a double posting this week cause I'm gonna be working on Christmas (don't ask) Here's something to make y'all a bit better since the last one.

On a professional and generally personal note, he would make a disgusted face if one talked to him about love. Hell, if someone even implied that he maybe loved you he would throw them his hardest glare and if already in a bad mood, probably threaten them.

But now? He wasn't sure what he was feeling. You weren't really.....at your best, he would say. Right now, you were pacing up and down looking frazzled and slightly crazy while he sat on the edge of the bed, watching you. The worst part? You weren't making any damn sense.

"Would you just tell me what's the problem here?" He snapped, losing it slightly.

"Nothing! Just go back to work or whatever! It's fine! There no issue at all!" You yelled back. Your face was deliberately not looking at his, as you just continued to pace back and forth maddeningly.

That's it. He needs to know what the hell is your problem. You weren't looking at him, you weren't making any damn sense, this was eating his brain. He was going to get to the bottom of this.

He grabbed your arm and yanked you to a standstill, making you stand in front of him.

"What is it."

"It's nothing! Just-"

"Just tell me. Now." He bit out.

"Like I said! Its-"

"Dammit woman! Just fucking tell me!" He yelled, finally losing it.

"It's you!" You cried out. Wait. What?

He blinked. His arm didn't lose its grip.

"Explain."

"It's just- you! You have this big thing of y'know your damn ego, cause of your ambition which is like, okay I get it. But at the same time you're dating me. That means that with all of your fancy stuff and your ruthlessness and your big huge dream of wanting to attack and destroy the Navy--which I fully support by the way-"

He watched you ramble, absolutely baffled by what he was hearing. His cigar almost fell out from this, his frustration was also climbing. This blasted woman-

"Cause honestly, fuck the Navy, but, not the point. Look, you have that, and that's a huge part of who you are and what you stand for and your big secretive past that you don't want to tell me and that's fine! Perfectly fine! However the issue comes when-"

"Would you get to the damn point already?!" He burst. His arm tightened around your wrist, face close to yours.

"I love you!" You yelped, staring with wide eyes straight into his purple ones.

He froze. Face dropping into one of quiet shock, with a very cold realization.

"I love you, Crocodile" you said, looking guilty. Guilty? Your free hand went to your hair, pulling, getting tangled, running through it, your eyes full of anxiety.

"I love you and frankly keeping in mind your ego, your ah, ambition and you-which I all love and respect by the way--I just, I just can't help but feel this could go very uh....pear shaped for me"

His hand eased slightly, brows furrowing.

".....Pear shaped?"

"Oh, uh....bad. Things might end up bad for me"

"How?"

"You, well, you could be I dunno, using me or something. Cause you don't love me really. You said it yourself. This is a business transaction." Your voice went quieter as you mumbled, gaze falling lower.

"Look at me"

"-And I know that you don't, so I'm not going to push it since this is fine and I respect your wishes but really! I just really don't like the idea of possibly be led on but dont worry I wont push it okay? You-" Your eyes grew wide as suddenly you were pulled into him, closing the distance. Your face was tucked into his neck, letting you get a whiff of cigar smoke, and expensive cologne.

"You silly little thing" He whispered, pressing a kiss to the crown of your head.

"You aren't.....completely wrong. But things have changed." He murmured into your hair, limbs holding you tight to him.

You stayed perfectly quiet. Holding your breath, you were stunned. This....this was new. This was new.

"I love you too."

[disneyprincemuke]

there doesn't seem to be anyone around

alternatively: others finally find out they're together

in which they're simply not discreet enough about sneaking around in the paddocks

(series masterlist)

"like we really shouldn't be doing this here if we don't want anyone finding out," logan struggles to speak, being pressed up against the wall in a discreet location of the paddocks.

the smaller girl leans up against him with a smile. "but i missed you all weekend. it's been so busy. need a makeout break, actually."

"we can just do this in my room," logan grins. "or yours, if you want - your room's much bigger than mine anyway. i can tell them i've got a headache and we'd get 15 minutes tops."

she takes a step back, hands on her hips as she tilts her head. an expression on her face that logan can't fathom. "do you wanna kiss me for good luck on the race or spend the entire time thinking of me?"

"i think of you during the race regardless," logan shrugs with a teasing smile. "what's your point?"

she throws her head back with a soft groan. she stomps her foot into the ground. "i just really want a kiss from my boyfriend. can you just- please, logan?"

"hm, that's not my name though."

"babe, we'll get caught with all your waffling," she points out tiredly. "the longer we're here the more suspicious it gets."

"okay," logan scoffs, taking a step towards her. "kiss?"

"yay," she grins. "i've always known you can't resist me."

"you're so right."

she smiles widely, resting a hand on logan's wrist as he tenderly grabs her face. she hums in satisfaction when their lips meet, gently walking forward to press logan's back against the cold wall. she bunches up the material of his fireproofs in her hands as she deepens the kiss, logan taking it upon himself to tangle his hands in her hair.

for a moment, it seemed that the world had melted away around them. it just felt like it was their world the way they were encapsulated in their kiss.

"oh sor- oh god!"

"oh, my god," she mutters, jumping off logan to the other wall. she wipes her lips on the sleeve of her fireproof suit, completely smudging her lipstick on the material.

as if her lipstick had not already been smudged all over logan's lips.

her eyes widen at the realisation of who's caught them red-handed in the act. it's one thing to be caught by the people who already know about the relationship in secret. but it's a completely different conversation when it's the biggest gossip of the grid.

"max, what the hell are you doing here?" she scolds, throwing her arms up into the air. "seriously?"

"what am i- what are you doing here?" max exclaims, turning around briefly to see if anyone had followed him this deep into the paddocks. there was no denying what he's seen now, especially with logan's lipstick-stained mouth. "i knew it! you're dating, aren't you?"

"man," logan mutters, shyly looking at her. "i told you."

"not the time," she scolds, holding a hand up to her boyfriend as she maintains her argument with max. "who even goes here?"

"i was running away from helmut! i just needed time to be alone before the race so i came here, and then i saw you," max rambles. he turns to point at logan, "and you! kissing! no, making out!"

"you weren't supposed to see that!" she shrieks, balling her hands into fists on her side.

"you're in a public area!"

"discreet public area!"

"still a public area, if you ask me!"

"yeah, but-"

"give it up," logan says softly, shaking his head. at that point, he'd wiped the lipstick off his lips on the sleeve of his dark fireproofs. "he literally saw us lip-locked, i don't think there's any arguing you can do to get us out of this one."

she turns to logan, an appalled expression on her face. "yeah, but he wasn't even supposed to be here!"

"we're not supposed to be here," logan states. he turns to max with a shrug. "yeah, we're dating."

max nods, slowly processing this new information. all the while trying to get the image out of the younger girl being pressed up against a guy. "how long?"

"two years."

"two- what?" max cries. "and nobody's found out? you've been able to hide this from the motorsport world for two years? there's absolutely no way!"

"lissie caught us like a year ago," she confesses, dropping her head in shame. "we were on vacation in a resort somewhere and she walked past us at the lobby."

"and nobody else has found out? you guys aren't being very discreet participating in a whole makeout session in the paddocks," max says, still trying to make sense of the entire situation. "really?"

"you believed us for like 6 months," logan shrugs.

"it's kinda obvious you're into each other," max shrugs, taking a sip from the red bull in his hand. "i guess i'm not that surprised if you put it that way."

"i'm surprised you're not with dumb and dumber," lando jokes as they walk the streets of japan with the sun shining brightly above them. "didn't get an invite to join them on their date?"

"funny," oscar laughs with a sarcastic smile. "no, (y/n)'s feeling a little under the weather and logan didn't feel like coming out - too cold, he said."

"interesting," lando says, surprisingly buying his lie.

of course, he wasn't invited on their date. but after a busy week spent apart due to differences in schedule, oscar made the decision to step away from their plans to give them some alone time together.

all oscar asked for was they bring him something back and joked about how generous he was to grant them alone time before they had to pretend they weren't hopelessly down bad for the other during the entire race weekend.

plus, there's always tomorrow to visit the ice cream parlour she'd been eyeing for a while before flying here.

while they never disclosed their location, oscar rapidly blinks his eyes trying to clear his vision of this couple up ahead that strangely resembles his best friends. and the girl is surprisingly wearing the same thing oscar last saw her in before he left the hotel room to meet lando.

oh, my god, that's actually his best friends out on a date.

the clear clue was when the guy rests his arm on her shoulder and she turns around to shove it off her while leaning forward to try and bite him.

"actually, lando, i think i saw this store i wanna go into earlier," oscar says quickly, hoping that lando hadn't spotted the couple hugging up ahead. "it's a couple blocks back, but i think-"

"hey, isn't that (y/n) and logan?" lando says excitedly, pointing at the same exact couple he'd just been analysing. "i thought you said- oh, they're kissing. why would they be-"

lando stops himself mid-sentence, turning to oscar with wide eyes, a loud elongated gasp and a dropped jaw. oscar, in turn, looks up at him with the guiltiest expression and he presses his lips together politely.

"george owes me 50 bucks!" he cheers, turning back to the couple in the queue for some sushi. "i knew it! they're dating! but... why would they..."

"(y/n) was scared of the backlash from the public. ya know," oscar shrugs, also turning to watch them with a scowl on his face, "woman in motorsport. being a woman in general dating somebody on the grid..."

"how sweet of logan to accommodate to that!" lando awes, a hand on his chest as he watches them sway side to side while she leans into his taller body. "aw! and here i thought i wasn't the only one with struggles to bag a girlfriend, and here they are crushing my hopes and dreams."

"sorry you had to find out like this. i was sworn to secrecy two years ago when i caught them kissing at the doorstep of her house."

"oh, wow. they're together a lot longer than i thought."

"how long?"

"i thought they'd just gotten together a couple months ago. i didn't know they were long-term." lando turns to him. "am i supposed to carry on like i don't know about them?"

oscar shrugs. "you can ask her if you'd like. she always jokes about the grid finding out eventually, anyway," he states. "she's actually more surprised that nobody's found concrete evidence until like... three weeks ago when max caught them making out in the paddocks. you guys had her questioning your intelligence."

"max what?" every time oscar speaks, lando learns something new that inadvertently blows his mind. "max found out before me? that grandpa caught them making out before me when i've spent the entire season trying to prove to george that they're definitely dating? i've even got a powerpoint!"

"unlucky timing, really," oscar shrugs simply. "are you gonna tell her?"

lando lets his linger stare before he shakes his head. "i'll let them keep their secret for a while longer. they're cute together, actually."

oscar smiles. "i know. i've never seen logan this... down bad for anybody in the entirety of our friendship."

lando hums, finally tearing his eyes away from logan who's holding a cup up to her lips for her to drink while she holds a box of sushi in her hands. "okay, i'll keep quiet for her sake."

"dude, i swear he's got a girl in there that's not (y/n)," alex whispers, pointing at the door of logan's driver's room. "listen to her giggle - that's not (y/n)."

"but i haven't seen her all day, mate. how sure are you she's not just snuck inside without you noticing?" george whispers back, pressing his ear against the thin wall to listen in like his best friend.

"he's sworn to hell and back that they're just best friends," alex explains with a roll of his eyes. "if i were him, i'd have given in the fifth time i asked because i asked him five times during pre-season testing in bahrain."

"but doesn't he always visit her room? you don't think she does the same?"

he's heard many speculations about the relationship of the two rookies. admittedly, lando's powerpoint dedicated to proving the existence of a possible secret relationship has changed his mind over the past couple of months. he actually kinda believes it now.

he would believe it wholeheartedly if they don't act like they aren't really close on race weekends. she's typically sighted with max or even lando, or just sebastian for a majority of her time on the paddocks. though, carrying her things for her when he didn't have to does make a compelling case.

"no, he almost only exclusively travels out to see her," alex says with a sigh. "you think we should knock and ask?"

"he's never going to tell you over the door. are you dumb?"

"he might - you don't know that."

"what are you two doing?" a deeper, sterner voice comes from behind them. alex doesn't even turn his head, just keeps his ear against the door to listen in on the happenings inside the room. it's strangely quiet now.

"he's trying to see if logan's got a girl inside with him," george explains to james, looking visibly tired of alex's antics. when james raises an eyebrow, george just shrugs. "he heard someone giggling for a mere millisecond."

"actually, i'm curious too," james mutters, shoving his hands inside his pocket. "anything yet?"

"no, they're very quiet," alex says slowly, nose scrunching as he tries to predict what would happen next. "oh, i hear footsteps. wait. someone's heading for the door."

alex quickly jumps from his spot, george makes a run for alex's driver's room and james simply stays where he is with his arms folded over his chest now.

the door opens, revealing a familiar face that everyone expected. logan lifts an eyebrow, watching the two friends scrambling to their feet and his team principal standing across his door. "hello."

"hello," james grins. "they were wondering if you've got a girl inside. claimed to have heard a woman giggling? i mean, unless it's a ghost, then i don't know."

"i was on a call with (y/n). she's still back at the hotel," logan laughs. he keeps his head on the inside handle of the door, poking his head out to look at alex. "nice try, dude."

but george can see a nail poking out from where he's standing, holding logan's wrist with a firm grip. he tilts his head to get a look at the gap of the door and the wall. there he sees it: he can make out the figure of somebody hiding behind the door.

"no way there wasn't anyone in your room," alex scoffs stepping up. he briefly scans the room from the outside with a frown when he doesn't find a trace of anybody else who could have been there. he sniffs. "your room smells like girl perfume!"

it almost wants to make george burst into laughter and yank the girl from behind the door. and then he catches her eye, eyes widening at the familiarity of it all.

he might not have recognised it if they hadn't spent the entire day pushed up against one another on a couch for panel interviews.

he just gasps audibly, catching the attention of the two other men in the room. logan's head snaps to george in worry before the tiny pixel of a manicured nail behind the door disappears. he can see her, from that very tiny gap, shaking her head profusely at him.

"i need to go find lando and pay him 50 bucks," george mutters, walking out of alex's driver's room. he pushes himself past the three men with his head dropped in shame.

"what for?" alex asks, taking his attention away completely from his previous hyperfixation. "that's a lot of money."

"i just owe him some money. i'll be right back."

— bonus: how her family eventually found out

the door rattles with the sound of a key being inserted into its lock. behind ciara who's scrambling to get the door open, she's bolting down the street to the best of her ability to catch her.

when ciara finally gets the door to unlock, she immediately screams for her mother, who answers that she's in the kitchen. she bolts inside, completely forgetting their house rule of no shoes in the house.

"mum, you'll never guess what i just saw!" ciara screams.

"she's lying!" the older girl screams, stumbling into the kitchen disheveled from the running. "don't listen to her!"

"mum! i saw her kissing logan at the mall!" ciara screams, pointing behind her where the couple stands. her older sister has her eyes narrowed down into a glare as she locks her jaw. logan, however, stands behind her with his hands in his pockets.

he just knows better than to interfere with their fight. (he once got in the middle of one when he was 17 and accidentally got smacked in the face which gave him a bleeding nose)

"we were not!" she retorts, stomping her foot on the ground and staring at ciara. she turns to her mother with a tired sigh, scratching her cheek. "mum! you can't possibly be listening to ciara!"

"she's got a boyfriend without telling us!"

"we can kinda tell," her mother answers in dismay, pouring the apple into a clean bowl.

"what?"

"yeah. what?" ciara scoffs, furrowing her eyebrows.

"you guys have been awfully closer since... well, for a while now," her mother shrugs with a small grin on her face. "also, you left a polaroid of him kissing your cheek at the beach on the entryway table. i'm the one who put it back into your room - not blythe."

she came from all giddy one evening from their first date, and blythe immediately guessed that she was seeing someone. the scream that erupted from blythe usually calm lips almost woke the entire house when she nonchalantly guessed logan correctly. they spent the entire night in her bedroom recounting the events of the night.

blythe has been covering for them for a while now.

"you're not mad?" ciara asks.

"she's an adult - she can make her own decisions," her mother shrugs with a smile. her eyes snap to the taller boy standing behind her eldest. "and i practically watched logan grow up - he's a good kid. i'm happy for you."

"she gets to have a boyfriend but i don't?" ciara scoffs, throwing her arms into the air. "she had a boyfriend at 16, by the way!"

the older girl scoffs, before turning on her heel. "you're 14, you nutjob. you don't have a case to begin with."

[cherriescreams]

Unworthy

MDNI

Gnreader x Atsushi

Trigger Warnings

Atsushi is DOWN BAD - Like, tragically, embarrassingly down bad. help him. Horny & Guilty - He wants them. He shouldn't. He wants them anyway. Shameless Ogling - Who knew bending over could ruin a man like this? Filthy Thoughts, No Self-Control - His brain? A sin zone. Painful Pining - The yearning is borderline catastrophic at this point. NSFW Lite - Thirsty? Yes. Explicit? Not quite. But still.

Not really edited and a lot of rambling, sorry.

────୨ৎ────

The afternoon sun spills through the wide windows of the Armed Detective Agency, casting golden light across the office.

The air is warm, filled with the distant chatter of pedestrians on the streets below and the occasional rustle of papers as his coworkers work around him.

The smell of coffee lingers in the air, mingling with the salty breeze drifting in from the harbor.

It's a peaceful day in Yokohama.

And yet, Atsushi can't breathe.

He sits stiffly at his desk, hands clenched together in his lap, his gaze locked-helplessly, hopelessly locked on them.

They're just working. Innocently. Diligently.

Sorting through papers, jotting down notes, utterly unaware of the absolute mess they're making of him without even trying.

And this? This is all their fault.

Not in a cruel way. No, they’d never be cruel to him. That’s the problem.

They had been kind to him—too kind. That’s how it started.

That’s how Atsushi ended up here, spiraling into some torturous, desperate mess of emotions, tangled in things he has no idea how to control.

He doesn’t even know when it truly began. It crept up on him in small moments, little things that, at the time, seemed meaningless but now haunt him.

Like that day when he had been struggling with applying bandages—not injured enough for Yosano to heal him, his fingers clumsy and fumbling, wrapping them too tight. They had noticed, of course.

They always noticed. With a small, exasperated sigh, they came over and took his hand in theirs, prying the bandages from his grip.

“Let me do it,” they had murmured, carefully unwrapping the mess he had made.

His body had locked up the second their fingers brushed his skin. His first instinct had been to pull away, but they hadn’t hesitated, hadn’t flinched at the contact like he had expected.

Instead, they had just kept touching him, their hands warm and gentle, moving with ease as they carefully wrapped the bandages around his wrist.

It had been so normal to them.

But to him? It had wrecked him.

That was the first time he thought, I want more of this.

And then, sometime later, they had spoken a single sentence that had nearly ended him.

“You know, Atsushi… you’re wonderful.”

It had been casual, a fleeting comment, as if they weren’t saying something impossible.

Wonderful?

Him?

He had laughed it off instantly, shaking his head because surely they were just joking.

But they had only blinked at him, completely serious, like the idea of him being wonderful was something so obvious, so undeniable, that they didn’t understand why he would doubt it.

“I mean it.”

That had been the moment he realized he wanted them to keep looking at him like that.

But the moment that genuinely ruined him had come even later when they had been working late together, long after the agency had emptied.

The room had been quiet, the only sounds coming from the rustling of paper and the soft scratch of pens against documents. He had been fine, managing to keep his emotions in check, until they had yawned, stretching their arms over their head, their shirt lifting just slightly, exposing a soft sliver of skin.

And then, without hesitation, they had leaned their head against his shoulder.

It was nothing to them. Just a moment of comfort, a small act of trust, something they hadn’t even thought twice about.

But Atsushi?

He had shattered.

His body had gone rigid; his breath had caught, and his hands had clenched into fists so tight his nails nearly broke the skin.

They had no idea.

He had no idea how badly he wanted to pull them closer, feel them against him, keep them there, and never let go.

That was the first time he had thought, "I want them. I want them so badly it hurts.”

And now? Now he’s here.

Watching them from across the office, completely unaware of how deeply, hopelessly wrecked he is over them.

They’re too kind. Too soft. Too good to him.

It isn’t fair.

Because they see him as something gentle. As someone who deserves kindness. And he? He’s sitting at his desk, thinking about how badly he wants to pin them against the wall and hear them moan his name.

It shakes him, rattles something profound inside that he doesn't have the words to explain. It isn't pity, nor fear, nor wariness-things he's used to, things he knows how to navigate. Instead, their gaze is soft. Gentle. Warm.

And it is torture.

Because it means they see something in him that shouldn't exist.

They shouldn't be thinking of him like this—with kindness, care, and concern that makes his stomach twist and his hands tremble.

They shouldn't be touching him like this, either.

A simple brush of fingers against his wrist, a light squeeze of his arm when they notice his exhaustion, the casual way they reach up to adjust his collar when he forgets to straighten it- each touch burns. Stains. Marks him in ways he doesn't deserve.

And yet, he craves it.

Atsushi knows filth. He grew up in it. Lived in it. Became it.

The orphanage had drilled it into him, carved it into his bones—he was worthless. A burden. A thing to be discarded. Something no one would ever love, not truly, not without expecting something in return.

And yet, they treat him like he's human.

It drives him insane.

He catches himself watching them when he shouldn't—longing for them and imagining things he shouldn't.

His stomach churns. His breath hitches in shame.

Because they aren't just kind—they're beautiful. Soft in all the places he is sharp.

Gentle where he is cruel to himself. They are good, and yet he finds himself ruining them in his mind, sullying the warmth of their presence with filthy thoughts he has no right to have.

He can't help it.

He wants them. Desperately. More than he's ever wanted anything in his life. Not just their kindness, not just their touch—he wants all of them.

He wants to feel them, to hear the breathy catch of their voice whispering his name, to press his lips to their throat and feel their pulse flutter beneath him. Wants to sink his teeth into their skin, to make them shudder, to make them say things they should never say to someone like him.

He wants to ruin them.

He wants to be ruined by them.

Wants to feel them pressed against him, to have their hands on his body, to lose himself in the warmth they offer so freely. He imagines what it would be like—if they touched him not out of casual affection but out of need. If their fingers slid lower, if their voice trembled, if they whispered his name not in concern but in something far more sinful.

"Atsushi..."

His breath catches. His mind conjures the sound of their voice, soft and needy, whispering his name like a plea.

"Please... touch me."

His fingers curl into his palms, nails biting into his skin. He shouldn't—he shouldn't think about this, shouldn't let himself want it.

But his thoughts spiral, unstoppable, imagining them beneath him, bare, their body arching under his touch, their lips parted as they whimper, as they beg-

"I need you, Atsushi... just like this..."

A sharp, strangled sound catches in his throat, his entire body tight with desperation. His mind betrays him, going deeper, darker.

He imagines their legs wrapped around his waist, their nails digging into his back, their breath hot against his ear as they moan his name like he's something they desire— something they need-something they want to be inside of them.

And it isn't just his mind anymore.

His body reacts, heat coiling low in his stomach, a tight, aching pressure between his legs.

The thought of them-panting, flushed, pulling him closer, grinding against him, desperate and eager because of him-it's too much.

"I want to feel you..."

He nearly groans aloud, his fingers twitching with the urge to grab, to take, to claim.

He imagines pinning their wrists above their head, forcing them to look at him, to watch the desperation in his eyes as he ruins them, as he takes every soft gasp, every trembling moan as proof that maybe-maybe—he could be wanted too.

The way they would writhe beneath him, the way their fingers would clutch at him, the way they would whisper his name—

"Atsushi, please—"

And then-they bend over.

It's nothing. Completely innocent. Just reaching for something, they dropped, completely unaware of the absolute disaster unfolding in Atsushi's brain and pants.

His vision tunnels. Heat spikes through his body so suddenly, so violently, that he nearly whimpers.

His hands snap to his lap over the ever–growing bulge in his pants, gripping his thighs like his life depends on it. He shouldn't be looking–he shouldn't be thinking–but god, the curve of their back, the way their clothes shift, the brief flash of skin—

It's ruinous.

He bites the inside of his cheek, hard enough to taste blood, forcing his gaze to the ceiling, to anywhere but them. He's barely holding himself together, shaking with the sheer force of his guilt, because—

He doesn't deserve to be near them.

He doesn't deserve the way they keep looking at him like he's worth something.

And it is the cruelest thing of all.