#this is not me trying to be edgy or making a statement or what have u

[hoshifighting]

I can’t wait for the day you decide to give us staff woozi😭🫶 Like yes give me that man ⚰️⚰️⚰️

staff!woozi

WARNINGS: suggestive, wet dream, mentions of animes.

staff!woozi who’s practically part of your nervous system, making sure your mic is hot and those earbuds don’t fry your brain mid-show. he’s always just there—like this phantom, gliding in with his little toolbox, brows furrowed in that way he thinks makes him look tough, but honestly, you’re kinda finding it cute now. he doesn’t even have to look at you anymore; just one twitch of your finger, and he knows exactly how to tune your sound to perfection.

you’re halfway through soundcheck, squinting against the stage lights that feel hot enough to cook you alive, when your left earbud goes all staticy. and before you even manage to do your little signal—a quick point down—he’s already behind you. no warning. just his voice in your ear, all low, like he’s got some big secret: “left one’s crackling again?”

you turn, one eyebrow up. “damn, woozi, you psychic now or what?”

he just huffs, pulling the earbud from your hand with this look like, duh. “you’re predictable,” he says, but there’s that ghost of a smirk, just the tiniest hint of it, which—yeah, okay, it gets to you a bit.

he’s fiddling with it, fingers so precise you swear it’s like watching magic. “you keep playing with ‘em too much. one more yank, and i’m replacing it.”

“not my fault they suck,” you mutter, grinning when he gives you that little glare, one that says i dare you to test me.

“try it again..” he mutters, his voice dry, clipped. he’s already yanked a whole mess of cables and tested every single one, but well, it’s jihoon. he’s on his perfectionist shit.

“testin’… one, two…” you go through it, all monotone, like you’re recitin’ a grocery list.

he glances up, hands fiddlin’ with some random connector piece, but he’s noddin’, brows all scrunched up like he’s concentratin’ on the meaning of life. and then, without even lookin’ at you, he says, “speak up like you’re actually performin’—not just for me.”

staff!woozi, in his worn-out, slightly-too-tight black t-shirt, earphones looped around his neck like some kinda edgy fashion statement, looks too good for your eyes.

“i am performin’,” you toss back, brows raised. “just, y’know, waitin’ for the tech crew to keep up.”

he scoffs, and finally, he looks up, an eyebrow quirked in that way he does when he’s two seconds away from roastin’ you to death. “keep up? alright, superstar, let’s get your fancy ass mic workin’ then.”

staff!woozi who's always fumbling with your clothing as he fix the mic return on your back. mumbling something about the mic feedback being all off. and with this stage clothing, the skin-tight fabric practically painted on you, there’s no space to breathe—let alone to move. so when he reaches to adjust the receiver on your back, the boy have no gentleness to tidy it up.

“how can you even breathe in these? hold still.” he sulks. his fingers brush against your skin, just under the edge of the outfit, and you swear his touch is cool, like ice, but somehow it sends this weird heat up your body. his hand skims along your back, his fingers grazing just under the fabric, feeling way more personal than it should.

“this is… really necessary?” you breathe out, tryin’ to keep your voice casual, even though your heart’s doin’ that embarrassingly loud thud-thud thing.

he doesn’t even look fazed, just gives you a quick, smug look, like he can sense your pulse trippin’ over itself. “unless you want the mic feed to sound like a dying robot… yeah, this is necessary.”

his hand lingers just a second too long on your skin before he adjusts the strap at your shoulder, his thumb grazing the edge of the outfit. you’re caught somewhere between wantin’ to annoyingly roll your eyes or “hornyly” roll your eyes.

staff!woozi who somehow, always ends up next to you on the road, no matter where you sit, and by now, you’ve kinda claimed his shoulder as your own personal pillow. he doesn’t complain—just settles in, eyes closed, arms crossed, and lets you drift off.

but today, as your head leans into that familiar spot, his voice pipes up. “y’know, there are other seats.”

you crack an eye open, only to see him smirking down at you. he’s lookin’ all pompous, like he’s finally pieced together your little routine. “it’s just… comfortable,” you mumble, shoving your face back into his shoulder, feelin’ the soft weight of his hoodie, and okay, maybe the solidness of his arm too.

he chuckles, a sound that’s too close to teasing. “oh, so i’m a human pillow now?”

“pretty much,” you mutter, pretendin’ to yawn. “it’s just… efficient.”

next thing you know, you’re both out cold, side by side, and the crew’s gotta wake you both up at the next stop. you stumble out of the van, all bleary-eyed and yawning, both of you with puffy eyes, while the rest of the team’s trying not to laugh.

staff!woozi who watches animes during his breaks. you’re sittin in the dressing room, half-done with your makeup, feeling that pre-show buzz, and there’s woozi, huddled over his phone, totally zoned out in his own world. you’ve seen him do this before—earbuds in, watchin’ his anime.

so today, curiosity gets the best of you. you wander over, leanin’ over his shoulder, catchin’ a glimpse of bright colors and characters moving around on his screeng

“you’re into this?” you ask, unable to hide the smirk as he looks up, caught.

he pulls one earbud out, glancin’ at you like he’s deciding whether or not to share his “serious” interest. then he sighs, almost reluctantly, but starts explaining the plot, his voice just a little too enthusiastic. and you’re nodding, totally faking that you get it, but he’s so damn into it, you can’t help but get a little wrapped up in his excitement.

when you’re waiting for the other idols to finish up their set, the two of you are back in the dressing room, side by side, watching some random episode. you don’t know half of what’s going on, but jihoon’s talking fast, pointing out characters, explaining every little detail like it’s life or death. you just follow it because staff!woozi is hot.

you don’t know how you ended up here, exactly— n woozi’s hotel room, in your freshest hoodie and sweats, hair still a bit damp from your after-show shower. but you’re here, a slice of pizza in one hand and woozi right next to you, already deep into the latest anime episode like he’s watching some masterpiece.

it started simple enough, you mentioning anime to him once. you barely know the basics, honestly, but your friend is an encyclopedia of every single plot twist, so you could at least fake it a little. and you’d swear woozi’s eyes practically lit up when you said you’d “totally be down to watch something with him, if he had recommendations.” it became your thing on tour—grabbing a pizza, lounging in his room, and watching the latest episodes like two kids after school.

but right now? you’re barely paying attention to the screen. woozi’s sitting next to you in this black tank top, arms looking like he’s been lifting soundboards for fun, thick enough to make your mind drift way off the anime plot. his shorts? even worse. you didn’t even realize a person could look that good just sitting down, like he’s giving you a whole show without even trying.

“are you even watching?” he mutters, catching you totally off guard. woozi raises an eyebrow at you, smirking. damn, he knew.

“oh, yeah, totally!” you stammer, nodding way too enthusiastically. “i know… exactly… what’s going on here.” but that smirk just grows, his gaze sliding back to the screen as if to say, yeah, sure you do.

staff!woozi, who hardly tears his eyes from the screen the whole night, so focused it’s like he’s analyzing every frame. you’re beside him, bundled up in his bed, head lolling as the exhaustion finally takes over, pulling you under. he glances at you every so often—at first just a quick look to make sure you’re out, catching the soft rise and fall of your breathing, the way your lashes brush your cheeks in the low light. you’d been running on fumes all night, so seeing you drift off wasn’t a surprise.

but then, he hears it—his name, whispered under your breath, soft like it’s the only thing on your mind even while you’re dreaming. his focus shifts. your back arches just the tiniest bit, your brows drawn together, thighs pressing tight like you’re holding onto some sweet secret even he isn’t supposed to know.

and suddenly, he’s more tuned into you than the screen, pulse pounding in his ears.

woozi pretends this never happened. or tries to.

staff!woozi, who’s suddenly got a whole new edge to him the next morning, acting all distant like you didn’t just watch an entire anime season in his bed last night. on the plane, you figure things’ll be back to normal—you’ve got this routine where you always end up leaning on his shoulder, especially after long nights. but today, he’s keeping a solid inch between you both, arms crossed like he’s suddenly allergic to any kind of closeness.

you try once, shifting a little closer, giving him that sleepy, half-pouty look that usually does the trick. he just leans away, adjusting his earbuds like he didn’t notice.

you huff. “yo, what’s your deal? i’m just trying to sleep, and you’re over here playing hard-to-get?”

he glances over, raising an eyebrow.

“don’t act like you’re too good for it.” you roll your eyes, crossing your arms. “you let me last night.”

“yeah, well, I’m not your pillow today. i gotta keep my neck in one piece.”

you nudge him with your elbow. “since when did you start caring about your neck, huh? you’re literally hunched over soundboards for a living.”

he shoots you a side-eye. “and maybe that’s why i need to protect it now.”

you snicker, leaning back, but there’s that stubborn pout on your face. “whatever, woozi. don’t get mad at me just ‘cause you didn’t sleep enough watching the show without me.”

you’re still leaning back, sulking a little, when you hear it — just a low mumble under his breath. “not my fault you were… moaning my name last night…”

your head snaps around so fast you practically pull a muscle. “excuse me?” you whisper, eyes wide as saucers.

he stares at you, lips parting slightly as he realizes he definitely said that louder than intended. his eyes dart away, and he’s already sinking into the seat like he might disappear.

you blink, heartbeat going wild as you piece together last night, flashes of the dream you’d had flooding back—heat and skin and his name on your lips. you remember waking up in his bed, flustered and warm, rushing back to your own room before he could see the look on your face.

“so… you heard that?”

his hand goes up to rub the back of his neck, cheeks reddening under that deadpan expression he’s clinging to. “yeah, uh… kinda hard to miss...?”

you bury your face in your hands, groaning, but you can’t resist sneaking a glance at him. he’s biting his lip, looking anywhere but at you, and you swear there’s a faint smirk he’s trying to hide.

“god, woozi, you could’ve just… i dunno, woken me up or something!” you mutter, feeling the burn creep up your cheeks.

“yeah, right,” he snorts, glancing back at you now with this smug little glint in his eyes. “like you’d want that.”

[gb-patch]

GB Patch Games: Sensitivity Reader Update

Okay, well I am able to make another statement before Rose does. I can now explain much more easily why I didn’t fire Rose. There’s been new developments with the leakers. The people behind this have doxed Rose’s discord account (please don’t go looking for it) and also shared a screenshot of an email that was sent to my support address months ago. They believe that incriminates us somehow, but really all it’s done is shown in broad daylight what they were doing and why I was defending Rose so much. If I had brought up that email as a connection to this myself people understandably would’ve thought I was making a conspiracy.

However, it is out now. Here is the story- a few months ago someone who wanted to remain anonymous sent me an email with a screenshot where Rose called me a cracker. And I told them I appreciated the concern but it’s alright, was there evidence of Rose being unkind to players? They had nothing. No response.

As an aside, yes, I have been aware for a long time that Rose uses crude language when talking about me. That doesn’t mean I’ve hidden how evil they were from players. It means I’m allowed to choose what I’m comfortable with. That original “reveal” didn’t shock or upset me in any way. Our Life is a sensitive, wholesome game, but I’m a full-grown adult. I’m not innocent or pure. The game I released before OL is XOXO Blood Droplets. Something I wrote and released to the public is full of crude jokes, curse words, and violence. It’s cartoonish and comical, but edgy. Rose themselves likes to BS with bad words and I’m not accepting abuse because I think getting called a pussy is funny. I know Rose doesn’t hate me or wish me any harm. Rose also isn’t causing “discourse” for me and my games on purpose, they were joking that bringing up serious topics is “discourse” to some people. Ironically, the leakers who did this are trying to make some “discourse” on purpose.

Regardless, I initially thought that email was from someone earnestly worried for me and that they moved on when it was clear I was fine. But that’s not what happened. Them and at least one other person have been waiting for months to bring this up again. They went through almost a year’s worth of Rose’s private posts to collect as many unflattering screenshots as they could, and then they didn’t send them to me. They posted them publicly. I had a suspicion from the get go that it was the same person/people from before who couldn’t prove anything to me in private. And if true, how horrible is it that a bunch of the comments they shared were crude language towards me, something they already knew I’d brush off as nothing. They decided for me that it was wrong and they wanted the rest of the players to do the same. Or even less charitably, those extra posts were simply there to make Rose look as bad and untrustworthy as possible and they didn’t care that I was comfortable with it. I could not explain everything we were thinking/feeling at first, but behind the scenes we were discussing how this was personally motivated and not a knee-jerk act without forethought. And we do know for certain at least the main people involved now, and they do have personal issues with Rose.

Also, if you still believe that they just wanted to help the game at any length because Rose is that huge of a risk, showing that email and framing something innocuous about me (not fainting at the word “cracker” and politely being open to more proof) as serious “evidence of wrongdoing” at GB Patch Games makes me believe they want to smear Rose so bad they’ll try to turn players against me as well. Plus, the post is framed as “this email was anonymously sent to me”, but we know from account details that the people who could’ve gotten those screenshots of the discord and email are the same people who sent that email and started this situation, which is embarrassing. I’ve confirmed the screenshots shared in the email to me and the original public post came from the same private, “venting-safe” discord server. There’s very few people in there. We know it’s still you and not a separate source. I can’t prove they think I’m stupid or in their way, but I can’t see how anything they’re doing is trying to be beneficial to the creation of OL: NF. They told me in the email they’d give me more evidence if I requested it and I was ready to know, but instead they went silent for months and then did this.

I want it to be clear that this doesn’t mean players can’t wonder if Rose has enough experience to be a sensitivity reader right now, or to worry they’re so invested in the game that it’s going to effect how objective they are with their feedback, or to say that Rose is flawless and has never done anything hurtful. However, I hope you can understand why I was on Rose’s side and couldn’t just fire them over this. It felt so incredibly unfair. If another person tries to get their way by doing this in the future, I will not hail them as a hero and immediately fire at the target. And I don't tolerate any racial harassment of any kind to anyone on my team.

If those people want to continue to share Rose’s private posts in retaliation, you can fuck off. If you somehow reveal now that Rose is secretly a murderer, I’m not gonna apologize and say I was so wrong about you. If you had tons of evidence of Rose being horrible to players, you should’ve sent it all to me and with full context to begin with in the email like you offered to do. I just don’t understand.

Any players who like to see someone’s least flattering points portrayed in the worst possible way and continue flocking to the leaks as fandom drama, I don’t want you in this fandom. I don’t want you to enjoy my games.

Anyone who has been truly hurt by this and are left confused and angry, I do completely understand that. I didn’t know how to handle this, and it made a lot of people not know how to keep trusting me. I am still looking into getting a community manager to help me better communicate with players, especially when something serious happens. And I’ll always be around for you to reach out to if you have doubts about anything.

[yescking]

Hi, your DE in Stars and time fan anon here (we have to come up with a better and shorter name to identify myself) I am agonizing because I haven't been able to play the game for more than a week and I won't be able for another couple of days, I'm trying to avoid spoilers as much as I can.

Now that we saw Pure Vanilla wasn't as oblivious as we thought I want to revise my post about White Lily using Dark Enchantress to beef with Shadow Milk.

Because she's not going to simply mess with Shadow Milk, she's gonna DESTROY his career.

DE makes it clear from the very start she's come back solely because of Shadow Milk, she doesn't explain why out of fear of what could happen to Pure Vanilla if this is revealed to the whole of the internet but her hatred towards Shadow Milk is very palpable.

Whenever Shadow Milk starts a stream Dark Enchantress will too and she'll try to PVP against Shadow Milk, everytime she does it in increasingly ridiculous ways, from doing a triple backflip off a rooftop before doing a headshot on SM to killing him with a butter knife. If she's placed in a different group she'll make a point of one upping Shadow Milk on everything, SM did a headshot from afar? DE will do three from double the distance, SM did a cool parkour trick? DE is ready to jump off a cliff on a motorcycle on fire? Shadow Milk makes a joke? DE is suddenly a comedy club.

Dark Enchantress makes a public statement saying she's more than willing to fight Shadow Milk or anyone who fights in his name, she very obviously destroys them.

Shadow Milk is very bewildered by Dark Enchantress and tries anything and everything, he fights her, he ignores her, he even apologised once but it was a spur of the moment thing when DE was chasing him and Smilk was one hit away from dying.

There are theories thrown around but the most popular is that DE is Shadow Milk's ex (will expand more on the theories on another ask because it's funny and I'm a matpat fan)

Shadow Milk hits a big subscriber milestone and he is NOT happy about it because half of his followers are here because of Dark fucking Enchantress, and what kind of edgy emo name even is that?! The "celebratory" livestream is just Shadow Milk playing adopt me while ranting furiously about Dark Enchantress, the chat laughs and mocks him during the whole stream.

(Dark Enchantress later makes a stream revealing she was the person that scammed Shadow Milk out of his dragon pet earlier that day, she tells it with this evil monologue that is clearly supposed to be mocking Shadow Milk)

DE ISAT anon my beloved.. since pv only tells lily about sm later on i can totally see all of this after redacted

[hushman]

Sort of self indulgent but part of me really wants to see Dick Grayson go back to being a cop. Though to be clear, I don't want an edgy, Grayson trying to fix the system as the one good cop within a corrupt police force, style story or an angsty trying to make peace with having to carry a gun despite his mentor's belief.

I want fun, mostly light hearted antics of Dick Grayson as a beat cop and all the shenanigans that can come from it.

I want a training officer who's utterly perplexed at how competent Grayson is, despite the fact Grayson is trying to fly under the radar and underplay his abilities.

I want the bat family and Titans to constantly find ways to tease Grayson for being a cop.

I want Damian to ride in Grayson's cop car and to pretend to be indignant but secretly wanting to play with the sirens.

I want Selina and Jason to see how close to the line they can get with Officer Grayson before he is forced to arrest them.

I want Officer Grayson to give Bruce Wayne a ticket and it becoming a running joke.

I want Stephanie and Cassandra to swap out all of Graysons uniforms to a size smaller, leading to Officer Grayson to trend online as "Officer Sexy" (they regret nothing).

I want super heroes trying to keep a straight face whilst giving Officer Grayson their statement.

I want Dick to slowly realise just how bizarre the DC Universe is from the perspective of law enforcement.

I want B tier villians developing an inferiority complex when they get taken down by Officer Grayson without needing to call in any super heroes.

I want Dicks attempts to fly under the radar to be regularly foiled and needing to find ways to resolve matters in the least Nightwing way possible.

I want Grayson in situations where he is forced to go full Nightwing and then needs Oracle's help to clean up the mess and protect he's secret identity.

Barbara: What is it this time?

Dick: I swear, this was just supposed to be a noise complaint.

Barbara: And what has it turned into?

Dick: 27 unconscious gangsters and an illegal weapon shipment.

Barbara: *groan*

[li-an-nie]

The origin of Isagi’s talent and a message for us (ft. Naruhaya & Kaiser)

Hi! This is something I've been thinking about for quite a while... and today I finally want to share with you my theory, or rather explanation, for Isagi Yoichi – his character, where his talent for adaptability comes from, as well as our own takeaways we can draw from Kaneshiro's characters.

This is a lot, but I think it shows how powerful the story of Blue Lock really can be!

Transformation

People often like to joke about Slursagi - how this ordinary guy with the seemingly most ordinariest of parents has so far spit out some of the wildest insults on the field haha. Well, sadly I don’t have an explanation for all of that, but I do have one for his incredibly fast and exponential progress in Blue Lock. I mean, we all know by now, as Naruhaya has said before and as was kinda picked up in the most recent chapters – it's his innate aptitude for adaptability, learning and change. Destroying yourself and then rebuilding your best version. Abandoning everything else and thinking of yourself as just a means to an end. While everyone else in Blue Lock had good enough soccer skills to manage just fine on their own so far, this is the method Isagi had to use in order to keep up with all the other players.

(see Ch. 53)

The question is just, where did this amazing talent come from? Is this a learned skill or a mutation, as Ego talked about? Is it nurture or nature?

If we look at it, the other guys in Blue Lock have all these sad backstories, traumas and toxic family relationships and whatnot. Yet Isagi has come so far, despite his ordinary background. Or rather... because of it. Or rather... only someone with a background like him could actually pull this off..! Why? Because Isagi has something that many of us don’t – unconditional love and support.

Again, this is just my own interpretation, but think about the term ‘destroying yourself’ first – what the hell does that even mean (if we ignore the edginess in that statement)?

(This is going to get super abstract, and even I don’t 100% know what I’m talking about, but hear me out first.)

It can mean so much – destroying your personality, your preconceptions of the world or a field, your prejudices, your obsessions, your pride, your fears, your regrets, basically anything that is capable of holding you back. Most people can’t simply do that. Naruhaya couldn’t. We all have inhibitions about certain things, no matter how hard we try, it often feels impossible to let go of certain thoughts and emotions. We're tethered to the past, afraid of losing our ‘self’ we’ve built in the process. There’s always a fear – if we fail, if we slip up, we might genuinely end up with nothing but our own ruin and failures, and that’s why we can never really go 100% of the way.

But Isagi can.

(see Ch. 55)

Origin

Isagi grew up in an ordinary household. But I'd say his family, his parents are actually far from ordinary.

We see it in the spin-off novel first, where Isagi’s incredible spatial awareness was apparent from a young age, making him very timid and much like a scaredy-cat in the beginning. But instead of scolding or condemning him, his parents always tried to understand and support him. And the same applied when Isagi first expressed his desire for a soccer ball.

(see BL Spin-Off - Isagi Yoichi Ch.2)

It doesn't matter if he's a crybaby, as long as he grows up healthy. For the first time, their timid, only son showed them what he wanted to do with his own will. That alone was enough to satisfy them completely.

With that out the way, this scene you probably remember from the manga is more than enough to illustrate everything (Ch. 152).

"You’re still our son, whether you’re special or average. What makes me happy is that you’re doing what you want, and giving your best at it."

"Whether you win or lose, no matter what… we’ll always be there for you, Yocchan."

"So live your life as you want."

Jesus Christ. If that’s not the most loving and supportive parents in the world, then what is?

Isagi’s parents have simply no expectations of him. They love and support him so unconditionally. They encourage and adore him, and they will always think of him their precious son, no matter if he wins or loses, if he chooses to live an average person’s life or risk everything to become the best striker in the world. Isagi knows this, and he grew up like this, he grew up with a certainty that no matter what you will still be loved. That’s why he can sacrifice everything of himself – because ultimately, under that everything is something that will never leave, and this certainty is what enables him to push so far in the first place. He developed a mindset that could push itself to its limits, and it directly impacted not only his life decisions but his evolution on the soccer field as well.

(see Ch. 55)

Naruhaya, on the other hand, had the same talent for adaptability, but he wasn't able to go as far as Isagi. Because unlike Isagi, there were things he had to protect, the stakes were too high – his sisters, and their precarious financial situation. Even though a dire situation like this should enable him to push himself even further, that stake is also exactly what held him back in the end. In his case, it matters so much whether he wins or loses. When it starts to matter, you ultimately become afraid of what will happen if you do lose, and for him that meant so much more than just the end of his dreams. Isn’t it natural to feel more under stress when the stakes are higher?

Opposites

So because of this foundation that Isagi has, he is different than the rest. This would kind of speak against the assumption I had at the beginning of Blue Lock, that his ordinariness is meant to represent all of us. With basically the message that anyone can evolve and transform themselves for the better, just like Isagi. But to be honest that was already thrown out of the window through the spin-off, where you see that Isagi was already gifted as a child. And I’m not even sure if this was supposed to be Kaneshiro’s intended takeaway to begin with, but there’s another way this message can fit together. The missing piece lies in Kaiser.

Because yeah, we all saw what Isagi realized in Ch. 282 was basically following the same thing Kaiser did 20 chapters before (discard everything but your original ego).

If we take into account what we know Isagi, it becomes all the more heartbreaking and ironic when we actually see Kaiser do the same type of evolution in Ch. 262 for the first time – I quote, “past achievements, pride, everything he ever won”, literally the joy he felt about becoming human, he was willing to destroy and throw it all away, he became zero, despite knowing that if he fails that’s all there would be left – zero.

(see Ch. 262)

He’s always had zero, and the soccer ball is the first thing he ever truly ‘gains’. After his career takes off, he slowly acquired more and more, fame, money, achievements, you name it. This would be the first time he possesses so much, but he doesn’t know the pain of losing something yet, because he never had anything before to begin with. Kaiser built himself a high mountain out of things he never had, but then was willing to risk the pain of losing everything and roll back down into that pit of nothing again, all for the sake of his goal. If that's not strength, then what is?

And it’s also a direct contrast to Isagi.

Isagi and Kaiser are opposites, they are extremes that came from completely different worlds and family backgrounds. And yet they are also exactly the same, because they had the same strengths and resolves and were able to undergo the same kind of evolution. One has all the love and one lived their entire life deprived of it, one never questioned being human and one never believed themself to be one, yet they both were able to discard everything of themselves and then rebuild a better version – all for the sake of their goals.

Takeaway

So coming back to the message, how does that apply to us, the average person? Isagi and Kaiser represent a spectrum, and if you ever feel stuck somewhere in life, then remember – you are somewhere in between those two worlds. Doesn't that mean that you're capable of the same change too? I also don’t think it matters whether you’re a genius or talented learner, in real life there’s no clear line between those things anyway. Every one of us excels at something and every one of us has to learn and adapt in other areas. But what Blue Lock ultimately shows is that no matter what background, age or ambition, in the end, the things that can push us forward the most are our own dreams and ego. We are all capable of change.

Thank you for coming to my TED Talk!

[housecow]

Wait can you still get actually cute stuff at torrid? I feel like they changed into Old Lady Clothes Mart mode a couple of years ago. Plus their clothes don't last anymore and wear out almost immediately 😭

i’ve heard this opinion SO many times and i just don’t understand it??? i’ve admittedly only started shopping there for around a year now though, i used to exclusively thrift my clothes or hit up clearance in straight size stores i knew had XL/XXL lol.

however, no clothing store nowadays is going to cater exclusively to a single style (even if it’s just what’s considered fashionable) unless they have a niche market, want to go out of business, or have incredibly unsustainable fast fashion type clothes. i’ve seen so many ppl talk about how torrid just doesn’t have the “edgy” stuff they used to, which makes me laugh so hard bc be real. their older clothes were ugly as fuck and there’s a reason they’re moving onto other things

and like. i guess torrid has a lot of “old lady clothes” but so does every other place available to plus size women, lol. but you can find cute stuff literally anywhere if you try hard enough. torrid is fantastic for the basics—statement pieces may not be easy to find there if you don’t use their online site, but if you’re willing to spend good money on some quality pieces from (usually) independent clothing stores, that’s not an issue.

as for quality, wtf are you on??? have you bought ANYTHING “plus size” from shein, amazon, or old navy recently?? that’s the stuff that falls apart—you get that shit and threads are already loose. I have several dresses and pants from torrid that’ve held up BEAUTIFULLY since buying them last year, and the sweaters i recently ordered are so much better quality than i expected!!

when people say this, i assume they don’t pay attention to what fabrics they’re buying lol. sorry not everything can just be thrown into the wash and dryer without regard for materials 🤷‍♀️ maybe try to take care of your clothes?

[goldenstorm0]

Kay, thinking about the new characters, mostly their names

hemlock is poison, and I'm going to guess that this guys specializes in poison. I am interested in hemlock being used a lot for executions, such as Socrates. idk how much of irl history is reflected in the sxf universe, but it would be interesting if hemlock was ever used in Ostonian/Westalian history for execution or assassination. I think I remember that poisons was Yor's weakest area as an assassin? And if Hemlock struggles with combat, that sets these two up to be some interesting foils and possibly antagonistic towards each other during the next arc. I really hope he runs into Anya, I want to know what's on this fuckers mind.

Also fucking love this design, very punk. I hope his cover involves running a flower shop, it would fuck well with the hemlock thing and I love the idea of this edgy punk man putting together bouquets, giving suggestions of what's best for someone's wedding, etc.

Little man here gives me more questions. A quick look on Wikipedia says that gympie is a type of nettle in Australia, I'd need to look around more to see if that could relate to his preferred assasination techniques. Very interested in the small detail that no one noticed him though, especially since they would be on high alert with Hemlock doing a little... greeting attack. Maybe he's priorities sneaking around? Traps and setting up accidents? It would make sense with his smaller frame, idk if he's just short or a child.

It'd be interesting if he's a child, that could lead into him also being an interesting foil to Yor too, giving an indirect eye into what she might have been like on the job when she was a kid. It's still too soon though to call it, he could also easily be just.. really short. a short king assassin

The more I look at his design though, the more I think he does a lot more sneaking than the others. Big'ol bug eyes aren't exactly uncommon in this story, but in combo with his short stature and imo buggy vibe (half expect antenna to shoot out of his hair), it sets itself up for a "fly on the wall" thing that could be fun. maybe more specific, surgical kills targeting 1 person rather than Yor's targets, which seem to commonly include multiple targets/groups.

And one mentioned Thistle, not going to say much. It's got thorny leaves. end statement

Very interested in how the arc is going to play out with more garden shenanigans, I hope Yor can use it as an excuse to take the whole family camping. Idk, I headcanon Yor being much more confident in the woods than city, she goes to the park when stressed, that means she can fish right?

Also I want Hemlock to try to poison the family. It could be fun

[whimsicalwritingsandmore]

Valentine's Series #3: Matching | yunho x reader

Pairing: jeong yunho x reader

Genre: fluff, romance

Summary: Yunho loves to be your personal stylist of sorts.

Word count: 659 words

Yunho loves to watch you style different outfits and piece them together into a look that uniquely suits you.

Especially when the two of you would go out together, he enjoys being your personal stylist of sorts and helping you put together the outfit of the day or night. Because he knew how much you loved tailoring your attire to match the events of the day.

Whether it was business casual, girly or simply laidback, he would find the time to join you on the couch and watch and advise on the pieces you chose. If he wasn’t able to, he’d either video call you or have you send pictures to him.

No doubt, Yunho was always very helpful and good at what he did.

Because for Yunho, he loved to admire you when you were in your element. From your pretty little short skirt that graced your silhouette, to either your flowy and luxurious silk dress that flattered your figure or the little hot off-the-shoulder number that you would pair sometimes with edgy ripped jeans or leggings or joggers - he adored you in all of them.

He delighted in your flair for the spectacular because no matter what you wore, you would always make a statement, and he relished and savoured being the one who got to be a part of it, and walk beside you either hand-in-hand or with his arm thrown over your shoulder on the street.

The way you would either let your hair down or tie it up in a high ponytail and let some strands fall in your face, he felt his heart beginning to do somersaults and his ears and face would turn slightly red from blushing so hard.

It was these moments that made Yunho realise he's in love with you. He hadn't told you that yet but knew that he had to soon and was hoping to on Valentine's Day. 

You both settled for a night out in the street market to celebrate because there was this one shop that served the most mouth-watering and savoury dumplings and noodle bowls you ever had.

So the look for tonight was laidback, warm (because of the chilliness) and a little fashionable. 

But Yunho had a little something up his sleeve. When he arrived, he was ready to help but first, he had to give you his gift.

"Try it." He suggested.

Walking into your room and opening the present revealed a stylish little light-brown number of corduroy cargo pants that accentuated your waist, paired with a charming white semi-crop top with a lettuce hem and an oversize coat.

It was the most stylish and expensive ensemble you ever wore! However, the look felt familiar. Running on a hunch, you took to google. And your hunch was right, you realised Yunho had dressed like this similarly a while before.

He found an outfit for you that matched one of his.

On the drive to the other side of town, you contemplated how to bring it up to him. You didn’t want to sound ungrateful, it was far from that. You were just pleasantly surprised by such a gesture. It made you feel a little woozy and giddy, at the way Yunho cared about you and the amount of thought he had put into his gift.

Finally, at the entrance to the market, you brought it up to him as you both were about to enter. He giggled and blushed, and played with your fingers in his hand before admitting.

"I did it,” he began, “Because I love you."

Registering what he just said, you looked at him dumbfounded and speechless, unable to form a coherent sentence which he mused about and found adorable. He patted your head as a gesture of comfort on his part, before pressing a sweet and meaningful kiss to your cheek.

"You heard me." He giggled again before dragging your still astounded figure along with him towards the market.

[frutiylaris]

Warhammer (40K and 30K) Youtuber Masterlist ("Good" At teaching/entertaining)

Hi there! This is just a masterlist cataloguing, in my opinion, the warhammer youtuber space and who can actually be reasonably trusted to give you lore/isn't terrible. This list is not exhaustive and very opiniated because I am, myself, a lore youtuber with a focus on citations and good info you can find yourself. My criteria may seem silly and too stringent on occassion but I run 5 servers, and hold the position of ""lore master"" in them, it is NOT a good role to have and in no way does it give me any more say on anything on the setting. My critiera is thus 1. Broad statements without backup < Bad 2. Fandom mentioned anywhere < Terrible, Lexicanum may be seen as "purist" but its better with how it handles sourcing. 3. Uncritical and wholesale reciting of fandom pages < Bad 4. Book mentions/Paragraph reading < Good generally, but a page number SHOULD accompany it. 5. Length < Hour long videos do not entice, they make people evade. If I can boil down an entire weapon into 15 minutes or less, you can too. 6. Community Fostering < How they foster their community and what community they prominently feature be it reddit, twitter (god forbid) blusky, tumblr etc. This critiera is not exhaustive and other reasons may apply. Ai is frowned upon because it harms the enviroment to an insane degree and is also FUCKING LAZY. Lastly, this list will be kept as up to date as possible and only include english speaking channels as I myself am primarily an english speaker. If you have a person you'd like to see added/researched please comment/reblog or send a PM The LIST in question: Luetin09 <- Length does not equate to quality nor does 30 years of experience/engaging mean you will get everything right. Terrible at actually teaching anything meaningful. That and selling fanon as canon on occassion, big no no. However, entertaining and good at argumentation on occassion. 4/10 Majorkill <- Swearing every few seconds doesn't make you entertaining. Doesn't think too much and very much a 'hype' man archetype. Attracts ""edgy"" types. However, exposed Arch, otherwise known as Arch warhammer, as a racist so additional point awarded. 3/10 OneMindsyndicate <- Dead in the water and uses Ai. 0/10 The Amber King <- Length does not equate to quality. Nor does neglecting your channel to mooch off podcasts make you look any better. 1/10 Mrbones40K <- Opinion focused channel on the setting as a whole. Bad source because of it. Also unironically using wojaks. Entertaining at the bare minimum. 4/10 The Remembrancer <- Quantity does not equate to quality nor does Length equate to quality either. Terrible source because of the content pumping. Entertaining and passionate but loses the forest for the trees. 5/10 Deadlifts for the dark gods <- Self-help focus on the channel, not bad, however unironically believes old warhammer was "better" and "soulful" Red flag, to me anyway, entertaining at minimum but terrible for 40K lore... also a shorts merchant, ew. However, defends fulgrim on occassion, additional point awarded. 4/10 Pancreasnowork <- You're not funny nor charming constantly shitting on warhammer 40K and claiming fantasy is the best thing since sliced bread, grow up. The personality of an in-universe eldar who thinks he knows better, thats the only lore accurate thing he has in his bones. Also stop whoring yourself out for dogshit sponsers. 1/10 Baldermort's Guide to Warhammer <- Channel name is misleading, however good hearted and focused on having fun with the setting and, though no citations are quoted, I can see Baldermort is trying his best to respect the setting. Terrible for learning lore, but very entertaining and has a good writing style. Focus on making fan works and you'll be okay. 6/10 The Ashen Hollow <- "Lore to sleep to" You can't absorb lore whilst sleeping nor retain said knowledge if you are tired. Length does not equate to quality either. 2/10 The 40K codex, imperial iterator, Scholars Lore, Lotara lore, The Forgotten narrator and Archivist Tenebrarius <- All of these are Ai. Grifters, the lot of them.

The Serpents Lodge <- Good hearted and passionate but terrible for lore, sorry lads. Entertaining but definitely on the ""edgier"" side of the fandom. 4/10 Astartes Anonymous <- Fulgrim slander is not looked upon kindly, joke aside. Terrible for lore and even attempts at teaching it, whilst good hearted, fall short. Mainly miniature and community focused, however shorts merchant. Very Entertaining at least. 5/10 This is the current version of list Ver_1.0, if you have anyone you'd like reviewed and added please let me know via a PM, comment or reblog.

[stellacartography]

Day 4 Green/grey / chess

The dimming grey of the clouds made the sky look infinitely blank. The washed out light of early February absorbed the colour from everything it touched. Greg was already hurtling towards a headache and Sherlock wasn't helping. Nor was John.

"It was obvious, John."

"Obvious to you is not obvious to everyone, Sherlock, as I've said before."

"The toxin had no other plausible origins. The wife's penchant for occultism notwithstanding, it would have taken thousands of pounds of cherries to extract sufficient cyanide by any method available outside a sophisticated chemical laboratory. And she was pitting them first!"

"It could have been cyanide."

"It could. But it wasn't. Take alone the signs of flushing and asphyxia and it could still be cyanide or arsenic or any number of pharmaceuticals–"

"Enough!" Greg roared, his head pounding. "Get in. No talking in my car or I'll leave you on a wharf."

There were some muffled whispers in the back seat that still sounded like bickering, but Sherlock and John mostly adhered to the letter if not the spirit of the law.

At Baker Street he found temporary parking and followed the two up to the first floor flat. They had quietened at the street door and Greg hung back to watch them, really observe as Sherlock was always insisting he do.

John climbed the stairs after Sherlock, his body held strong. He looked edgy, braced for anything, and when Greg stepped on the stair that elicited an intrusive creak in the silence, he was biting his lip when he glanced over his shoulder.

Greg was aware of the tension John and Sherlock carried between them. He'd been a fly on the wall of their relationship going on eight years. Their relationship had changed and shifted from the breathless infatuation of their early days but still held the startling intimacy that inspired so many rumours.

Greg had explained it to John once over pints when he'd tired of John's defensive "We're not like that; I'm not gay" refrain. "Nobody gets this," he'd said, staring down at his fourth pint. "Everyone wishes they could be what you two are. People see what you have, what you are to each other and they see what they wish they had. What it actually is is yours."

John had seemed willing to absorb Greg's pint-fuelled philosophy at the time, nodding sagely and staring contemplatively into his ale. Though nothing much changed about John's demeanour when yarders made comments about him and Sherlock – he still bristled, still got defensive and snarly – Greg never did hear him say the words "Not gay" again.

Greg followed the dynamic duo into the sitting room of 221B and couldn't help but observe the glances, the touches, the seemingly thoughtless considerations and superficial affections dancing over the surface of an old, deep tension. Sherlock touched John's arm, just about cupping it in the palm of his hand when he passed John his tea. John watched Sherlock stride to his chair as a starving man might watch a hot meal being handed to someone else.

"Godfrey," Sherlock began, leafing through a folder, "If all you need is our statement, you'll find it here and you can be off."

Greg typically categorised Sherlock’s games with his name as affectionate teasing, but today it was harder. Sherlock was more difficult, more of a berk, and he was clearly trying to excise Greg from his cosy evening in. Greg snatched the file away with a sniff and leafed through.

As ever, John had completed his statement and signed it. Sherlock's was blank. Nearly. Greg pulled the pages out and handed them to the lanky berk.

"You know you can't just write 'What John said' and sign your name."

"I contributed to his statement."

"I need your statement Sherlock, not an endorsement of John's. I'm going to make a tea since neither of you have offered and then you can dictate your statement to me." Greg stomped into the kitchen.

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@fluffbruary @totallysilvergirl @lisbeth-kk @etrebko @naefelldaurk

[k-tarotz]

i dont know if you would do astrology placements or zodiac signs but in any case i will ask and if not ignore this ask, what zodiac signs placements would bts fs have?

thanks a lot in advance!

this ask is actually very interesting!! i will try to give it a go ,, thank you for sending in the ask

way of doing the reading: I will do the reading based on tarot, not by analysing the birth charts. someone who has passion for astrology could be better at this than me, I do this for fun, not as a certain statement. the question I will ask is, “what astrological placement of (blank)’s future spouse show through the most? “. If someone is really good in astrology feel free to correct me if I say anything that could be incorrect.

Jin - Capricorn! The energy surrounding his FS is very loving, caring kind and supportive. Filled with warmth, but the first colour that comes through when thinking about this person is pastel green so that could be their main aura colour. Which would explain the compassionate, forgiving and healing energy that surrounds them. An extremely selfless person. Since their guides are leading me to focus on how his FS treats others I assume the Capricorn placement lays in their 3rd or 11th house. Mercury, Venus or Mars are also options here. I am not quite sure but my best guess is that they have multiple Capricorn placements and it shows through most in Mercury due to communication and in Mars due to action. [ queen of pentacles ]

Yoongi - Sagittarius! Now, his FS is the kind of person that burdens themselves with the problems of others. Making things harder for themselves, just so they can help others have a brighter future. They do also believe that because of this, sooner or later they will be rewarded in life even if they can’t immediately see this. Meaning, potentially believing in good karma. Their energy is rather sad and burdened, so this is a kind of person that works hard and swallows their problems for a better future, because they believe it’s the best. A person that is very hard on themselves, believes they should endure hardships rather than reach out. They can handle themselves though, they don’t enjoy being pitied. There’s just this potential of being too giving to the point they hurt themselves mentally. So because of this I believe that their placement is either in 11th or 12th house, although the later is more likely. Possibly in Mercury, but not necessarily. [ ten of wands ]

Hobi - Taurus and Capricorn! Now, I would like to point out that the card that fell out for Hoseok is associated with these two zodiac signs, to the best of my knowledge. I do think his future spouse is someone that is very unique, extraordinary if you will. I do not mean they are edgy, quirky or anything of the sort but rather they are unapologetically themselves without the desire for approval from anyone. They don’t copy anyone to be seen different by other people, rather they just allow themselves to be who they are. Due to this they will know exactly how to love him the way he is and in what way to respond to his different moods without making anything heavy or awkward. I truly do think they are soulmates as his future spouse has a very unapologetic way of loving him as well. Meaning they do it with their full heart, not caring about the opinion of other people and just doing what is best for the both of them. They know how to take care of him and they know he got their back as well. They could also be very successful in their field regardless of what their job is, so they are a hard worker who knows what they are doing. My best guess is Taurus in Venus and Capricorn somewhere in 8th house. [ king of pentacles ]

For those who are curious I asked whether he is polygamous or not and the six of cups fell out. I will not be assuming about his romantic life or preferences, however if you wish to you can form your own opinion on it.

Namjoon - Libra! I actually shuffled twice for this due to being unsure, and both times a Libra card fell out so I would say that’s a pretty strong confirmation. Now, his person is a very strong minded, honest and just person who always does their best to be level headed and fair in situations. A good human to the core, is what they aim to be. They have a really strong sense of personal morals and discipline that they make sure to follow even on their hardest days. A very self righteous person who just aims to better this world. Though, they are also very playful and can be emotional if things go differently from what they expected, where Namjoon comes into play and helps ground them. It’s a very interesting dynamic, they lack where the other excels at which just causes them to have more love for one another and want to help each other out in hard times. Also, the attraction between them is strong, Beyonce’s Dejavu is coming through strong as a sign so I thought it’s important to mention. This could be either in their Sun or Mars sign, but that’s just my guess. [ queen of swords]

Jimin - Scorpio! Now, I know that a lot of people think that Scorpio as a sign is a very mean and bad one to have anywhere in your placement but that is certainly not true. A lot of Scorpio people are very tender hearted and just want what is best for people, which his FS’ is not an expectation from. This person has a very good heart but could be misunderstood due to their looks as they could have sharper features or possibly a colder appearance. It’s the kind of scenario where you shouldn’t judge a book by it’s cover, you know? ‘Looks like they could kill you, but is a cinnamon roll.’ No, but seriously. This person is a really gentle person and desires the world to be a better place, possibly could often cry over world events that do not affect them, not because they are sensitive but due to having so much empathy within their heart. Due to this being the person they are to their core I do think this is either their sun sign or 12th house energy. [ death ]

Taehyung - Pisces! Now, I would love to point out that his FS spouse is extremely loving and most important of all mature. They will have a family together for sure and this person is very much aware of to take care of everyone in the way they need it yet they still feel like they aren’t lacking in anything at all, rather even grateful for the things that they have. Also, their loyalty is very much so highlighted and this pure, raw and genuine love they have for Taehyung. I am not saying he would, but even if he were to hurt them they would forgive him without having any kind of hatred in their heart. The best way I can describe them is ‘saint’. The kind of person to not judge, let alone hold a grudge towards their loved ones or anybody else. They were put on this earth because they are made to love wholeheartedly, really. My best guess is their placement being in 7th or 4th house looking at the fact that family and a stable home is very important to them.

Jungkook - Leo! Their person has a very fiery energy, I think the tower at the bottom of the desk proves this as its related to Aries. This person is very calm, collected, rational, intelligent and friendly, but, they are not going to shy away from a fight if they need to be involved in one. Especially if it’s about their loved ones. Of course, they will stand up for themselves too, but if a person they love or adore is being hurt or disrespected the person provoking them better prepare for what’s coming next. They can use both their words and their fist, whatever is necessary tbh. I do not think they look for fights on purpose though, it’s just that they have quite a strong personality and their own way of dealing with things. They don’t mean harm. As previously said, they are quite friendly and laid back. Really playful as well. Could at times playfully bicker with Jungkook, which he would actually like, it could bring out his competitive side a little bit. Aiming to “win”, I do think it’s something he likes about them. This could sit in either their 11th or 10th house although I think 10th is more likely. Possibly their moon as well.

that’s all! remember that this is for fun, don’t take it to heart. after all I do not know any of these people personally,, regardless I do hope it was a fun read!!

– Candy

[nezoriy]

List of "normal" things that always baffled me as a person on the aro/ace spectrum:

Disclaimer: A lot of this is based on the feelings and perception of my teenage self when I started to feel people around me were weird but didn't have the language or concept yet to understand what was wrong. So, give me a break if it sounds edgy sometimes. I don’t have the energy to sugarcoat every statement so it doesn’t offend anyone. If you're part of the mainstream and feel attacked by a random dude on the internet questioning things you find "normal," maybe ask yourself why you’re upset instead of coming for me.

1. "Love at first sight."

Even as a kid, this felt like a scam. I get friendship, and I can imagine love developing out of it. But for that, you need to know the person. You can't know someone instantly. So how on earth is this supposed to work? (The answer is, most ppl can feel sexual attraction instantaneously and it gets sold as love for the kids.)

2. Finding someone "attractive" = you’d like to fuck them.

I honestly was like 20something when I realized that actually yes, when ppl talk about someone, even celebs, being "attractive," they do mean they’d like to have sex with them and not just compliment them on their looks.

Like, I can honestly say that many of my friends, Cate Blanchett, and Hugh Jackman are "attractive." But to me, that’s like talking about a painting. Like, sure, Singer Sargent's Madame X is "attractive," but no one's trying to, uh, get it on with the painting… right?

3. The whole concept of dating (to find a romantic partner.)

So, you’re telling me people meet up specifically to see if they might develop feelings for each other when they don't have those feelings yet? 

Like, what even makes you say yes to a date if you don't know a person at all? (The answer is: once again, sexual attraction, obviously.) 

On the other hand, if you’re already friends with someone and just wanna see where it goes, why bring the flowers and fancy dinners into the equation?

4. Why people (especially women) would even risk sex back when it could have had major consequences for them

The list includes (but isn’t limited to):

Women before reliable contraception in societies where an unplanned pregnancy could be socially catastrophic;

Brothel visitors once STDs were known;

(Here’s the tricky one bc I myself kinda feel guilty for not being empathetic enough) gay people, especially men, in times and places where they could literally be imprisoned or executed for having sex

I need to be very clear here, this isn’t about moral superiority as I'm not feeling any, it’s about survival. Like, if sex could legit mess up your life, why not just… not do it? 

Yeah it's basically rip to “fallen” women but I’m different.

5. The culture of one-night stands, cruising, club hookups, etc.

This is still a bit uncomfortable in my head because this is a very prominent part of gay culture specifically, and I’ve always felt incredibly disconnected from it. But I can't edit it out.

Okay, so someone’s hot. I can maybe get that there’s a spark. But if you don’t know them… what if they open their mouth mid-action and reveal they voted for trump? Instant deal-breaker, my genitals are shriveling in terror.

6. The need to have a partner / actively searching for one.

I give it to you, if you vibe with someone, getting into a relationship may make sense. But actually, putting in effort to find one? For what? There’s so much other cool stuff in life!

7. "I haven’t had sex in five minutes/a month/half a year 😱😭" / jokes about dry spells.

Do you actually keep track of the timelines? So what if you haven’t? I get it, orgasm is great and all, but your hand still works, right? Why do you need another person for that? 

8. Imagining yourself in place of a person/character in sex scenes.

This mostly applies to fanfics but also “regular” porn. Even if the scene is hot, I don’t picture myself as any of the characters involved. Even if I'm aroused, I like it precisely for the characters in a specific scenario, I would only be a third wheel there. 

9. Sexual fantasies with yourself as a participant.

I really don't want to imagine myself in any sexual scenarios, neither with fictional characters nor with real people, even if I might have a crush on them. 

10. Cheating in relationships/marriage.

I’m not even talking about the moral aspect of breaking trust/violating the negotiated agreements; it’s the fact that someone "just couldn’t help themselves," “accidentally” had sex. Like, you’re willing to break an agreement, feel all the guilt, and go all secret agent-level to hide the thing because you… what, couldn’t keep it in your pants?

11. Extreme jealousy over sex.

Alongside the last point, I don’t really get why people make such a big deal about someone sleeping with someone else. Sure, it’s not cool to break agreements, and it’s a valid reason to re-evaluate the relationship. But just because they hooked up with someone else? Why is it such a dramatic deal?

(Spoiler alert: I’ve grown up to be poly now, who’s surprised xD)

12. The sexualization of women in media, ads, and the outrage from cishet guys about female characters wearing realistic armor instead of metal bikinis in their games now.

What do you mean, people actually like this and it works on them? Do people actually appreciate having half-naked women in their media? Seriously?

13. The priority of romantic relationships over friendships and every other kind of relationship.

From "got a partner, disappeared for two months from their friend group" to the whole idea that romance is inherently more "serious" or "important" than friendship. Why? Who made that a rule?

Okay, that’s it off the top of my head. Might add something later. 

[chasedeys]

I always find it funny how different Ja’marr and Joe’s aesthetics are (edgy vs psychedelic like you said) given how different their personalities are

like Ja’marr is human sunshine while Joe has very serious black cat energy (unless he’s with certain people but what do I knoooww 🤔)

they truly dooooo have differing aesthetics oughguhguhh like they both love their bright colorful statement pieces to death they just go on about it their own way like i said yeah ja'marr pairs them with dark and edgy while joe goes for downright psychedelic 😭

ja'marr loves his diamonds and blings while joe wears them too but kind of bc its kind of expected of him??? (?? i don't actually know for sure the particular lore of his blings tbh lol but its giving those vibes. kind of expected him to be a grossly expensive charms necklace kind of guy. the recent colorful (?) one is definitely his vibes tho). ja'marr's entire thing with the fleur de lis vs joe's entire thing with his sentimental wristbands. and then their styles just start bleeding into each others oughgughguhh (well ja'marr's to joe lol clearly the better style between the two and also. clothes saga. ehem)

bright sunshine ja'marr 😔🫶🫶 but also specifically he’s THE golden hour moment you know that setting sun brilliance growing darker by the minute bc he’s very free with his laughter and smiles and jolly and happy-go-lucky (joes own choice of word btw crazy) but he also has extremely petty layers like the competency thing, the i won’t trade jerseys if you talked shit thing, the write my name right thing, the whole beef he has with an entire nfl team thing etc etc

ALSO if i could make some cat dog comparisons lol:

ja'marr's giving golden retriever sure but he’s more of a german shepherd to me but specifically the ones with extreme case of soulful puppy dog eyes and whines to be petted and shamelessly thinks he's a lap dog and rips all his toys within weeks and refuses to wear plain collars and leashes and enjoys walks to the park where he gets to run around with all the dogs in the park within the first few seconds of arriving but also stays loyally by your side growling at strangers getting too close to you and also refuses to sleep anywhere but on your bed by your feet and there's times when you sit on your toilet seat trying to take a shit only to nearly die with your pants down bc he just slammed open the bathroom door and sat his ass down right in front of you staring at you taking a shit.

joe's definitelyyyy black cat but particularly those black cats that shows affection on his own terms one minute you’re having a heart attack bc he appeared out of nowhere rubbing on your ankles and purring when you scrub between his ears only to freak out the next minute because he’s disappeared literally to thin air only for him to meow balefully from inside the kitchen cabinets bc you’re too loud and frantic while he’s trying to have his lone time but also incredibly loyal when your family and friends come by he’s nowhere to be found but when you have weird strangers over he sticks by your side hackles raised hissing at them and he also has moments of silliness where you look up and he’s contorted himself to an eldritch horror shape just staring at you in the middle of the dark and it's just because he wants the spot you're sitting on.

combine them 🫶 and you come home to black cat peacefully napping on top of a panting german shepherd's head while your couch pillows are obliterated to shreds and stuffing all over the place and there’s kitty claw marks all over the coffee table.

[swanshapedheart]

Poorlittlekoi’s statement

Disclaimer. I, the poster, am not Koi

I am someone putting her thoughts and response to her situation into the public as I was encouraged to do so. I feel it is also necessary to bring this up as well.

I do not want to be affiliated with controversy any further.

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“this whole situation has messed with my head to the point where i cant even send a text to most people without worrying they are gonna leak it or use it against me in the future,, svlvnsore was just bored and found me really annoying shown in screenshot one…. not only that they also called me out for heavily referencing or tracing when they reposted an artpiece thats doing the same thing. Svlvn said they are on my ass because i didnt credit who i referenced, when the person they reposted didnt do the same either proof in screenshot two three and four. Another thing i caught on to is that they SPECIFICALLY said they didnt care that i self harmed or did horrible things to myself when they posted about me. i have anxiety, i overthink! of course im going to do bad things to myself, im mentally unwell. proof in screenshot 5… and for screenshot 6, this is only an assumption, but saying that svlvn "didnt know" is something that really throws me off. when someone makes a callout post on someone else, there will OBVIOUSLY be harassment. thats just my thought, i feel like they knew what they were doing since him and his bf arent very good people either. especially holding onto old dms and gathering them up to use it against me, when they could have handled the situation privately with me, rather than hide it behind my back.

all of this could have been prevented if they handled it differently, and that goes for me as well.

im fully aware im in the wrong, but these people are wrong in some places too. and i want people to realize that.

many artists in tcc trace, reference, all the time. i dont understand why im slandered for heavily referencing something, not tracing. theres proof of an artist doing this FROM THE ORIGINAL ARTIST BTW in my dms right now but i dont get them involved

am i handling this situation immaturely? maybe, but arent they doing the same by harassing me? absolutely.

when it comes to someone being racist/homophobic, people feel the need to harass this person to make them feel worse about what they did. this isnt how you handle a situation. harassing someone to the point they attempt suicide is just as bad as what i did, possibly even worse.

now i have recover slowly until i have the chance to even feel comfortable with myself again. i understand what i said and did was wrong, and im sitting here attempting to change and apologize to the people ive offended and hurt, but throwing that apology under the rug and making it seem like im guilt tripping is ridiculous.

so they cant say i didnt try to apologize, but nobody is guaranteed to accept my apology and thats okay. but putting it out there as if im guilt tripping when im giving reasons why i said it is not even giving me a chance to change

when it comes to growing up with a HUGE racist family, these words and beliefs become apart of my vocabulary and thoughts. its very hard to change that especially when i was always told "its just a word" and i hear it daily! growing up with these slurs has become so normal for me to say it just slips out with no worry, but ofc im seen as guilt tripping when i say this.

its different for each person, i saw a comment saying they grew up in a southern family and they dont say it, but thats them, not me.

people at school and during family events would peer pressure me into saying this slurs multiple times because they found it "funny." i slowly believed that as well.

i was a young teen being taught the wrong things, and seeing other people in tcc say it made me feel like i should say it as well to fit in and be edgy, since thats what the community is like

this situation is another lesson for me to learn, but other people in it need to learn that harassing someone isnt okay, either. especially when im trying to change, it doesnt make it any easier.”

[xxgothchatonxx]

"I thought I'd feel like I was losing Claudia. I did not care."

I have heard similar statements be said in quite a lot of vampire shows. But in those contexts, it's usually done to show how "cool" the vampire is. "Ooh he doesn't care... he's so powerful that he doesn't care..." (or they so obviously DO care but they're too busy being edgy assholes under the bullshit guise of being "complex") but here it's a struggle. And it's a very relatable struggle. When you think you're going to have a certain strong feeling about something but then that feeling doesn't happen, a common reaction is "what's wrong with me?" Louis is trying to get himself to feel something. But he knows that he's lost something. And yes this is a struggle he has in the book. It's just phrased differently. (I also really like how this scene touched on the element of intimacy, or lack thereof regarding Louis' feelings towards Madeleine, when making fledglings)

And once again, great writing isn't that great without a great actor performing it, and Jacob Anderson was fantastic. He didn't overdo it, but he has also never once slacked off with the effort when playing Louis. It's another case of saying a lot without saying much. I thought it was really well done.

[lets-go-hurt-someone]

I know this is a BG3 blog, but humour me.

A good decade before Astarion could step gracefully out onto our computer screens and into our hearts, there was Zevran Arainai. I want to shine a little love on my first delightfully murder-y elven rogue.

Ruminations beyond the cut. Fair warning, it’s long and there’s heavy discussion of how they each reflect on trauma and abuse. The similarities are honestly never ending.

Of course there is the obvious— they’re both blonde, they’re both pretty, they’re both the unambiguously pansexual elfy rogue boy of the group. They are sassy and sarcastic and cynical but in a fun way! Oh, and the accent! You take them along for the sneak attacks but keep them for the delightful snark.

And of course, they both introduce themselves by tricking and then trying to murder you.

It makes absolutely no logical sense to trust either of them, really: they’re both prolific killers who express no real remorse, but instead some enjoyment, in what they do.

They’re quick to sleep with you, but slow to trust. If you show them compassion, it confuses them. They both have trouble understanding love, wanting love, being loved. After all, they were both slaves. And they both have only been free for all of about 30 seconds when they meet you.

And once they realise they care about you… they stop sleeping with you because their past has so warped the way that they relate to their own bodies and sexuality that they don’t even know what to call it, let alone how to cope with it.

Because they’ve both been forced to make their entire identity seducing victims for slaughter. They’re both survivors of pretty horrific mental, physical, and sexual abuse.

But there’s the difference: that statement is true of both Astarion and Zevran, but only one of the two would really describe it that way. Astarion knows he’s been abused. Zevran… has convinced himself he’s thankful for his lot in life. Until he’s not.

Zevran has late aughties sexism and edgy sexual banter written all over him, to be sure. He outright sexually harasses pretty much every woman he meets, and a few of the men. It’s meant to be light-hearted teasing, but not all of the dialogs have aged well. I remember not thinking much of it back then, it was standard stuff, but now… now I just read it a different way. I don’t know if this was the writers’ intention, but to me he’s always clearly been a victim of sexual abuse who’s coping using hypersexuality. He’s rationalising the hell out of the fact that he sleeps with all his targets (which is rape, of course, but rape perpetuated by someone who has been so abused as to be unable to even consider framing it that way… or he’d have to consider reframing what was done to him, too). Unlike Astarion, a killer and a practiced lover are the only identities Zevran has ever had: so he leans into them, holds them close.

I feel like they managed to sweep some really heavy nuance under the rug by making Zevran seem like he’s just another shallow playboy stereotype for the player to “fix.” Like he’s telling you all these charming stories about bedding his targets before assassinating them, telling you how he’s been trained to be an expert in seduction, and it’s all very intriguing and compelling but then you think… he’s like what… 24? The math from the extended universe puts him out as a working assassin when he was 15 or 16 at the latest. He says he dodged sexual abuse as a child growing up in the whorehouse, and that being sold to Crows was a better alternative… but really, the Crows pimped Zevran out the same exact way Cazador did to Astarion. They both had no choice but to lure countless people to their deaths with their looks.

But while Astarion resents it, Zevran tells you all about it with a wink and a grin… so we get to sigh in relief and move on. You don’t have to interrogate it too much if you don’t want to. But it’s there. And it’s damaged both of them. Right to the end, if you tell Zevran you love him, he will lament it as cruel — he can’t comprehend anything else.

Zevran paints a more impressionistic picture of someone coping with abuse, but with Astarion the game takes us a step further and gives us a closer look at the internal struggle of actually healing. If the archetype is moody sassy trauma elf, Zevran to Astarion is the most wonderful progression of the character trope I ever could have hoped for. (And I’m sure there are some Fenris stans who could write an essay on where he falls in the pipeline.)

What I boil it down to is this: While Zevran was a bit more of a veiled, blink-and-you-miss it sort of representation that hugely reflected what was socially acceptable at the time, Astarion gets to be a fully-fledged meditation on trauma and abuse. He gets to be ugly, and seen as ugly or sympathetic depending on how you treat him. He gets to examine why he acts the way he does, and consider new ways to relate to the world. He gets to make what was only really implied with Zevran explicit.

And finally, at the end of his arc, Astarion gets to say “I love you.” I just love that for him— and for me. The young person I used to be who saw herself in Zevran has grown up and saw herself in Astarion, too, now more mature and nuanced and reflective, putting herself back together piece by piece. These two characters somehow each struck me at a very particular time in my life, in a mirrored way that reflects how their stories mirror each other.

For me, before Astarion, there will always have been Zevran. Two characters I never thought I’d see in a video game, that I can’t help but be dumbfounded at how they each helped me process my own trauma. It’s incredible. It feels important. I know I’m not the only one who feels this way, at least about Astarion.

But I do wonder how many other people have held onto Zevran in a little piece of their hearts too, the way that I have. For all his flaws, he’ll always be my first.