#this is not a dig at ANYONE bc i am also an active participant

[lesbian-of-nine]

dad the prog rock men you like are being babygirlified on tumblr

[caitybug]

hi i have more hope this isnt annoying/// prompt! baz is the librarian for the local library n simon is the kid who always returns his books late

Definitely NOT annoying!! Thank you so much :D. 

I’ll put it under the keep reading :). 

(Also if anyone else wants to send a prompt... like go for it. I won’t complain. The more ridiculous the better tbh.)

(Also Meri I hope you were looking for a response that is 1500 words bc that’s what you’re getting kthnx.)

(Might fuck around later and post it to ao3 idk.)

It’s only a summer job, but it’s a job that frustrates the hell out of me at times. 

Especially people who cannot follow simple instructions. Return books to the drop off box, don’t shout, don’t run, and please do not participate in sexual activities in between the rows of books. 

I say the last one because I just walked into two teenagers groping each other in between the reference and biography shelves. 

Choose a better section at LEAST.

If I ever did I’d probably do it behind the romance section. It’s fitting for the mood, at the very back section, and no cameras can see you there. 

Not that I’ve thought about it.

I’m checking out a little kid and his mother when I see the worst person to ever walk into the library.

(The worst is probably dramatic. There is a guy who tries to bring in a water bottle that smells of whiskey and a bag of chips that gets crumbs all over the computer. But at least that guy leaves me alone... Simon Snow, however, can’t leave me be.)

Simon Snow can’t seem to pay his library fines. He turns in every book late. It’s ridiculous. There are certain rules in this world, and this can’t be that hard of one. He could just renew the book online even to buy himself some time.

But he never does.

He sneakily tries to drop his books off without me knowing, but he can’t ever get anything past me. 

“Snow,” I say, handing the woman her receipt and walking towards him.

He freezes and looks up, face scrunched in embarrassment. 

“Do you have money to pay your fines? I can only assume you’re turning these in late too,” I gesture to the books. 

“Uh, well,” he stammers. Snow always stammers. 

I cross my arms and raise an eyebrow, waiting for a proper answer. 

He starts digging in his pockets, pulling out a nickel, penny, a Dr. Pepper bottle cap, and some lint.

I grab the change and frown at the bottle cap.

“Why do you have-”

“There’s a code,” he shrugs, “I was hoping to win a prize.”

Of course, he would do something like that. 

“Please bring money next time you come in,” I say, moving to go check out another customer. 

He nods and walks out, leaving the Dr. Pepper bottle cap behind. 

I grab it and stash it in my pocket. 

After I check out the customer I decide to grab the books Snow was returning. What could he possibly be reading that takes him so long?

He has three books this time:

1. Fun Home

2. Heartstopper vol. 1

3. Bloom

I frown. 

They’re all graphic novels, so what is taking him so long?

Then I blush, realizing another trend they all have in common.

I shake my head and check his books back in.

I also erase his fines.

______

The next time Snow comes in it’s to check out some books. 

I can’t help but think of the books he turned in last time. I was also nosey and investigated the other books he had checked out the past couple of months. 

They’re all gay.

Is Simon Snow gay?

“Snow,” I say as he approaches. He has one book, the next volume of Heartstopper. “Do you have your money for your fines?”

He doesn’t have fines anymore, I erased them, but I can’t let him know that. 

“Uh,” he responds. 

He’s not good at using his words, but somehow watching him fluster about is incredibly adorable. 

Snow turns out his pockets and has a crumpled receipt, a french fry, and the cap to a pen.

I shake my head, God this boy is an idiot.

“Snow I’m going to have to stop letting you check out books if you can’t pay off your fines.” 

It’s an empty threat. His balance is zero.

He nods, however, and grabs his books and puts the receipt where I highlighted the due date into his pocket. 

When he goes to leave, I remember something.

“Wait, you left something last time you were here,” I open my drawer and pull out the Dr. Pepper cap. “Good luck winning, but I am sure you won’t.”

He smiles and grabs it.

“Thanks, Baz.”

I smile back. I didn’t know he knew my name.

_______

The next time I see him I’m shelving books. 

I don’t typically do this part of the job, but the page is out sick and we had a huge pile.

I also didn’t want to deal with all of the kids here for the magician. 

It’s in the LGBT section where I find him, staring at the books.

“I don’t think I’ve seen you so intensely in thought before,” I say.

Why am I such a jerk?

“Oh, uh, hey Baz.” He says. 

He looks like he is blushing. 

“Do you need help, Snow?”

He shakes his head and looks up at the top shelf. I look up, following his eye line, and see the third volume of heartstopper.

I step closer and reach up to grab it. 

I can’t help but smirk when I hand it to him. 

I’m at least three inches taller than him. Good to know.

“Thanks,” he mutters, before turning to leave.

Stop him, my brain says.

My body, however, doesn’t move.

______

The fourth time he comes into the library he is with a girl with brown frizzy hair and dimples on the back of her knees. She’s dragging him through the reference section, piling books into his arms.

It’s quite funny. I can see the whole scene perfectly from the front desk. 

They sit at a table and Snow and I make eye contact. He smiles, and I immediately look down.

It’s like looking into the sun when he smiles, blinding and overwhelming. Doctors should put a warning on him.

Don’t look directly at him, it’ll damage your eyes and you’ll be seeing stars for an hour.

We don’t talk, but we keep catching each other’s eyes. My face feels too warm and soft. 

I check his library account, and his book is already two days late.

Rolling my eyes, I renew the book and erase the fines.

If my boss found out about this I’d be murdered.

______

The next time I see him is at the back of the library, he is wandering around and I’m putting back books. A book club of middle-aged women came in, and with them, a stack of raunchy romance novels. 

“Oh, hey Baz,” Simon says, smiling up at me.

I swear my breath hitches.

“Snow,” I reply, reaching up to put a book on the top shelf.

It doesn’t go there, but I need him to know I can reach that high. Higher than he can. 

I’ll fix it when he leaves.

“So, uh, I won that Dr. Pepper prize.”

I look over and raise an eyebrow, waiting for an explanation.

“I got some money and thought I could pay my fines,” he continues.

I freeze. He doesn’t have any fines. 

“Well, Snow, you could go to the front desk and pay those off,” I say, grabbing another book and putting it on the top shelf.

Why am I putting all of these up so high? They don’t belong here.

“I did, actually,” he continues. I cringe. Fuck. “But they said I didn’t have any.”

“Well, they must have looked at the wrong spot because I can assure you there are fines.” There aren’t.

He steps closer to me, I drop my arm. He smells like popcorn and Old Spice.

Why does it smell good?

“Baz, did you forgive my fines?” He asks.

I scoff.

“Snow, why would I-”

“I think you did. The lady at the front, the one with the grey streak in her hair, said it looked like I had made payments these past few weeks.” I cringe, Fiona is going to kill me. “So, my only question is, why?”

I stare at him, not knowing how to respond. ‘Because I like you, Snow. I like the way your golden girls always look a mess. I like the stupid hoodie with a hole in the sleeve looks on you. You are covered in moles and I want to kiss every one of them.

I look at his lips, the thing I want to kiss the most. 

“I don’t know what you’re-”

“Baz,” he steps closer. “If I’m off base here feel free to tell me, but I-” he gulps, taking a moment. “I would like to take you out. Consider it repayment.” The way he smiles makes my heart skip.

I nod, not trusting my voice to respond. 

And then, fuck, he leans up and puts a hand on my neck, lips almost touching mine.

“Wait,” I manage to stay, pushing him back. His face drops, but I grab his hand and pull him around the corner.

The romance section, corner of the library, where there are no security cameras. If I’m ever going to kiss someone in the library, it’ll be here.

I push him against the stack and kiss him.

And, god, is it good.

[ihaventspokenyet]

Nothing A Little Red Lipstick Can’t Solve (Mando x Reader)

Word count: 2.1k

Warnings: language, flirting, suggestive language (no actual intercourse), drinking, make-out (kinda?), reader insert (idk if that’s a warning), this was made and edited around 4 am soooooo yeah

Disclaimer: I do not own any of the mentioned characters from, “The Mandalorian”. I do not own you and have no affiliation with Disney, Disney Plus, or The Mandalorian. This is simply a fan fiction story.

A/N: It’s like 4 am and I just needed to get this out of my system. It’s not like super smutty, but I’ve been dying to write about Mando for some time and just needed to post something. Please leave back constructive criticism if you can and I hope this isn’t too bad. ALSO this is a repost bc it wasn’t showing up in the tags

—

The yearly ball was being thrown and everyone who was somebody or extremely wealthy would be there. Famous across the galaxy for being lavish and full of women and men who held a high status in their planets, it was only accessible via an invite or through connections. Your father had been a contributor for the event since you could remember, so he and his family were always welcome at the event; however, you were never really one for a crowded dance floor full of sweaty bodies and girls who acted a little too helpless in hopes of luring in a sugar daddy. But this week was different, you had been stuck inside your home with little entertainment due to a security breach and your father wanted to ensure his families safety. You were antsy and deprived of your fun for far too long so you decided a night of messing with the hearts of “pretty boys” who only wanted to get in your pants would be great entertainment for your dull week.

So here you are, preparing with your friend ,Seliah, since you didn’t want to be alone all night. Deciding to dress less flashy than most, you opted for a long pale pastel-blue satin dress with a slightly slightly plunged neckline and a slit in the middle starting from just above your knees. You decorated your outfit with a white shawl that hung just below your shoulders, nude heels, and a deep red lip.

Looking at yourself in the mirror and satisfied with your appearance, you made your way to the ball. The evening began a little hectic as men and some women swarmed you for pictures, a chance to engage with someone of such a high profile, or in attempts to pursued you into participating in lewd activities.

After successfully shooing everyone away, you had settled down to talk with Seliah and decided to order a drink in hopes of replacing the boredom with a little booze. You had noticed a handsome young man eyeing her all night and–deciding to be a good friend, encouraged her to talk to him--but now you were completely and utterly drenched in boredom.

A metallic glint caught your attention and you were surprised to see a fellow (or perhaps toned lady?) decked out in beskar, extremely unfitting of the occasion. Surprised you didn’t see him sooner and pleased to see such a change in pace in this type of event, you smirked to yourself; you smelled adventure. This person was either important, intimidated their way in, or had manage to gain entry by lying. A tingle ran down your spine, boy were you feeling mischievous at thought of stirring up some trouble with the helmeted being. Downing the last of your drink and re-applying your lipstick, you sauntered your way over to the Mandalorian.

“I have to say, I absolutely love the way you’re dressed. Very fitting for the occasion,” you purred and slipped into the chair next to them.

The person snorted and, although slightly distorted by the modulator, sounded like a man.

“Man of few words huh? You don’t see many Mandalorians often, especially not here. I’m guessing you’re here to stir up some trouble,” you speculated.

“You’re Aldone L/N’s daughter. It’s a surprise to see you at an event like this.” He finally spoke up, turning his head to look at you.

“So I was right, there’s no way you’re a casual attendee would pay attention to me,” you smirked. “So what’re you here for? Let me guess, one of these assholes got themselves into trouble and managed to get a bounty on their head?” you questioned.

“I have no business with you. I suggest you turn away before you get yourself into trouble,” he responded, looking back at his untouched drink.

You chuckled and leaned in close to his helmet, “That may work on anyone else, but I’m sure you know that if you tried to lay as much as a finger on me, my father would put a bounty on your head and that would risk your little operation.” You speculated in a hushed tone, “Am I wrong?”

“What do you want?” He finally asked, standing to look at you and clearly readying himself to leave.

“I want in on whatever you’re going to pull tonight.. You can’t deny that I would be a beneficial ally.” you proposed, standing in an attempt to match his demeanor but he was much taller, despite your heals.

“What do you gain from helping me?” He asked, puzzled and hesitant to believe that the daughter of a powerful man who he was going to rob from would help him.

You grinned, with mischief was prominent in your eyes, ”to ruin the fun of all the dirty bastards here and to minorly inconvenience ‘daddy’s’ event… also, why would I miss the chance at fun night with a Mandalorian?”

“Fine. But if you try to sell me out-” he started.

“Yeah yeah big guy, i’ve heard it all,” you shushed him and took a sip of his drink.

He had hesitantly explained part of the plan and omitted any specific information; grab some documents that held information regarding someone he had captures (can you guess who? ). The hardest part would be making your way up with such a flashy man.

“Follow my lead.” you whispered to him, grabbing his hand and placing a flirty smile on your face.

He definitely didn’t trust you yet, so he was hesitant to follow you and he wasn’t one for physical touch; you were only slightly overstepping his boundaries. Your sudden grasp of his (armored) hand threw him off. If the touching wasn’t enough, he definitely didn’t expect whatever the hell you were going to do next.

“Ma’am nobody is allowed to-” a guard had attempted to stop you, but you flashed a pass.

“I have special access. And I just want a room, if you catch my drift.” you said flashing Mando a flirty look.

The guard became embarrassed and uncomfortable at your insinuation.

“Ye-Yes ma’am,” he stuttered, stepping aside.

You pulled the Mandalorian up the stairs and he followed closely, albeit a bit flustered at your actions--he’d never admit it though.

“Didn’t mean to make you uncomfortable there. It’s just that stuff like that makes people more vulnerable to persuasion,” you threw him a smile.

You turned a few hallways and finally made your way to the one that held the papers. This hallway was forbidden, even for you, so you’d have to be extra careful. You heard a guard approaching so you quickly messed up your hair and wrapped Mando’s hand across your waist.

Leaning in close, you whispered a quick, “Take me to a room, I’m drunk.”

He thankfully got the message and gave a curt nod.

“Hey! You can’t be here!” An armed guard made his way to you both.

“Mr. Aldones daughter needs a place to sober up, we’re just looking for a room.” he spoke as you acted like the best damn drunk you could concur up from (many) passed experiences.

“This is a forbidden area.” He cautioned.

You immediately pretended to cry, “Don’t yell at me! I’m going to tell daddy you’re being insabordinate!” You slurred and hiccupped.

“Nice going, you made the girl cry,” the Mandalorian spoke up. You could hear the slightest hint of amusement from him.

“No I-I didn’t mean to- Please don’t tell your father,” he begged.

“I’ll make sure she keeps quiet, but you should get out of here. You know what her father would do to someone who makes his daughter upset, don’t you?” Mando warned.

The guard nodded and thanked Mando before running off.

“You don’t seem like the type that would act so well.” You replied, wiping a bit of mascara and loose tears from your eyes.

You took out your key and fiddled with the lock.

“Shit..” you mumbled. This lock was reinforced much better than the rest, “I can’t-”

“Move aside,” Mando spoke.

Pressing some buttons on his wrist cuff, the Mandalorian successfully shot the lock. He entered quickly and looked through the papers inside. He found a locked box hidden between a messy pile of books and smashed it with his fists. The grunt he let out from the power of his punch caused a shock to course through your body and your thighs to clench.

“I got it-” he was cut off by a screeching alarm.

“Shitshitshit..” your eyes widened with  genuine fear of being caught filled your body.

You must’ve been blinded by your want of fun because you genuinely didn’t think about the consequences of being caught. Mando quickly took your wrist and ran down to the hall into the nearest bathroom.

“Okayokay, it’s fine this is fine,” you breathed, beginning to hyperventilate.

You liked to cause chaos, but you might’ve gone too far this time; why was this document so important? If you survived this, you were never coming here again. Suddenly, an idea popped into your mind (definitely not a good one, but it was really your only chance of running free).

“I got it!” you yelled, digging through your purse for your dark red lipstick, “if there’s one thing i’ve learned from years of fucking around, it’s that theres nothing a red lipstick can’t solve.” you said while you pulled out the delicate tube.

Quickly leaning over the mirror, you applied a coat of the silky crimson color and then smeared it with your hand. You went to apply a second coat and then turned to face him.

“Not to sound thirsty, but we have to make out so they think we’re doing it.. and I know the faces of Mandalorians can’t be seen so you’ll have to give me some marks as proof, I can wrap my eyes with this shawl” You spoke urgently, but awkwardly.

He seemed to stare at you through his visor for a good minute, likely looking for an alternative to making out. You began to feel small under his gaze, maybe the idea was THAT terrible and he was rethinking his alliance with you? You hoped he wouldn’t think you’re too strange after this. The bounty hunter tried to think of an alternative, coming up with nothing, he sighed and went to lock the door and shut the lights.

“Turn around and close your eyes,” he ordered, waiting for you to comply.

You hesitantly turned your back to him and heard the sound of something popping off and then hissing. You won’t lie, the authority in his voice was very… alluring. You felt a heavy pressure over your head, before realizing he was sliding the helmet onto your head and your vision was purely black.

“… I’m sorry about this..” He spoke, seeming genuinely apologetic.

“No worries cowboy, you’re not the worst person I could be stuck doing this with,” you joked, hoping to ease his tension, “in fact, your voice tells me you’re a real looker,” you teased.

Snorting, he held your hip and hesitantly dove for your neck. All he needed to do was leave two or three marks so it would be believable. Your breathe hitched as he began running his lips over your throat. Biting your lip and gripping his shoulder, you forced yourself to swallow gasps he gently coaxed reddish-purple bruises to the surface with his lips; you didn’t want to seem too eager.

“They won’t think anything’s happening if you don’t make noise,” He warned with an even voice, only slightly breathless from his actions.

Was he unfazed by all of this? Here you were struggling to contain ALL sorts of noises, only for him to be nonchalant about the whole situation. Hurt because of his seeming lack of interest, you were pulled into your thoughts. Trying to feel where you were (and trying to not accidentally touch you too inappropriately) he slid his hand to your knee and gave it a good squeeze; a warning that you had to make this believable. Increasing the pressure of his kiss to you throat, you let out a few breathy groans just as someone knocked on the door. Mando quickly took his helmet off of you and placed it on his head. You slid your dress straps off of your shoulder and pretended to cover your chest with your shawl before opening the door.

“Y-yes? Is there a problem,” you asked flushed and breathless because you felt like a mess and because you were (unfortunately) turned on.

“Oh um.. I don’t suppose you heard anybody sneaking around here, down that hallway,” a female guard asked, flustered and pointed to the hallway you had just stolen from.

“No, I’ve been..” you cleared your throat and smiled, “busy in here.”

She nodded and ran off to check the rest of the rooms. Checking the hallway, you pulled your straps up and pulled the Mandalorian down the stairs and back to the first floor. Amongst the commotion, you had managed to escape the building and ran with Mando to wherever he was going. Embarassed that you looked like a mess from the fake “sex”, you covered your face with the small shawl. You stopped behind an alleyway and caught your breath.

“Thank you.. It couldn’t have gone better without you,” Mando spoke up.

You looked up at him, flushed, and nodded your head slowly while wiping away the lipstick you had smeared on your chin.

“No worries, this was exciting. A little too exciting.. I doubt I’ll be doing any shenanigans anytime soon,” you laughed awkwardly.

He let out a chuckle and pulled out a pouch.

“I’m sorry for the..” he trailed off pointing to his neck, “Take this, for your trouble.” he handed you a pouch of money.

You shook your head, “Keep it. This was fun and in case you’ve forgotten, I am wealthy,” you joked in a stereotypical pompous accent, “If you ever decide to come back, maybe we can spend some more time together,” you suggested, hoping you’d see him again.

He thought about it, nodded, and turned to leave with a final thanks. You sighed and leaned up against the wall; he turned you the hell on and you’d be lying if you said you didn’t want more. Biting your lip you began to walk home, smirking to yourself as you remembered the red-lip mark you’d left on the inside of his mask; he had to have seen it and you were curious as to why he didn’t mention it.

“Y/N! There you are! Where the hell did you go?” Seliah yelled in the distance.

“Hey Sel? Where did you buy me this lipstick again? I accidentally broke it,” You spoke.

“Um? Are we going to ignore the fact that you look like a total mess?” She sighed, “let’s take you home, we can shop for it tomorrow… wait where did you get those hickies?! Your father is going to kill you!”

“He can’t if he doesn’t find out,” you sung and began walking home.

[seasaltmemories]

Devil’s Line Review/Analysis

This is gonna be a different beast to tackle for a few reasons A) I actually started this once before and dropped it, B) For a proper analysis I’m gonna have to dive into spoilers, and C) I technically haven’t finished the entire series, as the last volume of the manga isn’t translated (and I will only talk about the manga here) I say this all so you’ll be gentle with me as I pop from subject to subject

To start let’s get that summary:

Tsukasa, a college student, is rescued from an attack by a devil, one of many vampires that can blend in among the human population. Anzai, her savior, is a half-devil who exploits his supernatural gifts as a member of a shadowy police task force that specializes in devil-related crime in Tokyo. As Anzai continues to keep guard over Tsukasa, the two quickly forge a tentative bond—one that Anzai fears will test his iron-clad rule of never drinking human blood …

So I feel like expectations play a lot into how you receive this story and what you want to get out of it.  My first time going in I was told it was a dark fantasy series, and then what I got in the 7 or 8 chapters I read was a lot of faffing about of will they won’t they with the external plot only appearing to be there to drive the main couple together, so I got bored and dropped it

This time I went in not only knowing there would be a lot of romance, but also personally more in the mood for vampire stuff, and kinda meeting it where it was allowed me to see it grow into more interesting ways

The beginning isn’t bad, but I think it is best appreciated when you know up front this is 50% romance and 50% thriller, both genres are equally important to the narrative, but rather than starting out with that ratio, the beginning focuses entirely on Tsukasa’s and Anzai’s blossoming romance, from there a greater plot concerning devils begins to unfold, and then the two really begin to work in sync to prop both sides up

Bc once the ball starts rolling, the plot becomes a high-speed mystery concerning secret conspiracies and questions of who you can trust, what started out simple gets more information added on that complicates matters as you begin to question your own judgement, still what keeps the plot from becoming a jumbled mess is the fact at the heart of the story is always Tsukasa and Anzai, it gives the narrative focus that I’ve see few things series have

I should also mention my first impressions of the romance being shaken bc I am so used to series having couples who are love at first sight yet waste the entire time actually getting together until the end, and while these two basically also have love at first sight and take a while to actually get together, they get together in an overall timely manner, and their relationship is allowed to grow and evolve in very mature ways, not just sexually but also emotionally, a lot of their arc together is learning about how to communicate what they want to the other and as their relationship grows, their strength as individual characters grow as well

Now I’m gonna get into some spoilers, but what turned the series from simply fun into can’t put down is the timeskip

A lot of the elements that I enjoyed were being done before the time skip, but I feel like the skip is what allowed it to reach new heights it just kept hovering up at

Bc slowly as we start from Tsukasa and Anzai, the world expands, first to his colleagues, then to their enemies until it is a large but never burgeoning cast of connections, and the way they keep it all together is that it is grounded by lot of casual little moments to see people just be people, no matter their relation to the protagonists, we are consistently shown the humanity of almost everyone we come in contact with, and as a result it is hard to not fall in love with people who had previously tried to murder your faves (and might still currently be doing so)  and after the timeskip we just get hit with back to back side stories of the cast each going through their own internal problems, while still keeping to focus on Tsukasa and Anzai

Another thing that helps is that the worldbuilding concerning devil’s is extremely well-done, again it starts out simple “they see blood, then transform into monsters, sexual lust is connected to their bloodlust” but not only do we learn devil’s themselves, but a lot about what it means for a world to have a population like this, for example we get a detailed look into the tech created to help devil’s have safe sex with human partners and while it can be easy to poke fun at such specific details, by the end of the series it really does feel like an actual genetic disorder rather than some supernatural stuff with a sciency explanation tacked on

A moment that really made me stop and realize “oh the person behind this must know stuff besides story-telling” was when after and educational lecture about devils, the speaker admitted privately that the model used to describe them was problematic in that it demonized certain sects of devils, like wow, it was a quick moment, but a story showing the struggles of nuanced activism? Then we not only touch upon exploration of devil’s through a social science lens, but the overall philosophy that gets brought up on how to deal with institutional bigotry is interesting (this will be endgame spoilers so if you want to skip this, scroll down until you see bolded words again)

In two separate cases, we see two queer women involved in institutions get asked to do something unethical, both decide that if they refuse then they’ll get fired and someone else will simply take their place, and their goal then becomes to work through the system until they make it to the top and can start openly resisting

The effectiveness of these strategies is intriguing to dig through, the first is a researcher breeding devil/human children to study, (many of the participants being convicts) and from her actions we see her try and inform those involved to the best of her abilities and get their consent, and when possible, try to use couples who are already together, any information that would put individuals at risk of being chosen for illegal experimentation, she destroys, when she becomes the head researcher, she changes the program to rely completely on studying the children of already formed devil/human couples who come to them willingly

The second is asked to head the conspiracy of wiping out all devils, when ironically she is a devil herself, and so what they do is essentially play their part until they’ve amassed enough power to eventually stage a coup, until they can get an insider to be the prime minister to publicly reveal to the world, the conspiracy and have vocal support of devil rights, not only does this plan depend on the actual killing of innocents and riling up actual bigotry, but it also attracts actual cold-blooded killers and violent bigots which complicate matters, and for all their effort, the prime minister gets assassinated right during his big speech 

As I mentioned their is still one volume left untranslated so I don’t know how it will add on to this, (most of the plot lines got wrapped up so I can’t see many major developments happening beyond wrapping up character plot threads) but they’re some juicy thematic questions to chew on as well, which is always a treat

Returning to some general strengths of the series, there really is a genuine sex-positive stance, I say that specifically bc it isn’t just simply exploring themes of sex, but also the way it does so, as mentioned above, there is a lot of baggage around devil’s and their sexual relationships, but a lot of what the characters have to learn is that such desires are normal and not some great abomination, just something they have to be responsible about, no one is shamed for communicating what they want/like, especially women, where multiple female characters are in fact openly encouraged to communicate to their partners that they are interested in sex, and from their we watch multiple couples (including a m/m one) work out what they want, in one neither is interested in romance, but is ok with a friends with benefit thing, two have the male participant be unsure of their feelings and so they work in their comfort zone (one likes physical touch and kissing, another they only hug) the m/m couple not only get screen-time of struggling with the “are you gay, I want to show interest but not get perceived as a creep” deal, but one admits to being repulsed by sex, and they still work out a romantic relationship

And the most surprising amount part of this, is that there is no unnecessary titillation, the eternal question of what is over-sexualization and all can get confusing and tiring, so I won’t define a specific threshold here or say this is the only way to tell such stories about sex, but first you don’t got any unrealistic body proportions on anyone or any creepy shots, everyone is fully clothed and dressed normally for the non-sexy bits, and while we do get a sex scene, it is pretty non-graphic (you got boobs and that is all that it on screen) so there really isn’t any confusing moments like in other stories I’ve experienced where I have to wonder if the framing contradicts its message 

I could go on, but the strength of the story lies within at the end of the day being about normal people just trying to live their lives, it really does seem to capture the essence of what it means to be human effortlessly, and I am just immediately charmed and ready to follow Ryo Handa in whatever other projects she does

[survivedeathvalley]

EPISODE 2 - “CHICK FIL A FOR EVERYONE, IT’S RAINING FRIES, HALLELUJAH!” - GABBY

I wanna establish myself as a strong force in this game. When people open skype web and remember they have to be active here I want them to think, "Oh I gotta deal with that bitch Misty too" And I intend on getting to the bottom of who voted for me... Paul [Kage]

Guess who helped start a new alliance! :) Basically Kat, William and I are part of a 3 person alliance called "The Chaos Crew". I feel fairly comfortable working with these two because they both said they were supposedly new to ORGs (don't 10000% buy it), also it would be in all of our interests to stick to a 3 person alliance to make sure that if in the case we do attend tribal we can at least tie if not be in the majority. 

I don't really understand this cast. They're really bad aliases. Yikes... I was talking to that one guy on my tribe with the normal-sounding name and I told him I didn't like making small talk because everyone is "fake". Then he said "I'm not fake! I promise". So I responded that it's not like anyone is fake in *that* way, but it's because of the alias thing... then he thought I was asking him for an alliance. What the fuck. Then he exposed to me that he's NEVER played orgs before and he's SO out of the loop, which might be true, but I don't want to take any chances. I think he's just bad at playing dumb.

http://imgur.com/j0q7pWl

I'm glad that Marco is gone, but I can't help but wonder who voted for Misty.  I hope she doesn't think it was me.  

chick fil a for everyone, it's raining fries, hallelujah!   I have to remember Sunday that I can't be working if I'm not around because Chick fil a does not run on Sundays, I can feel myself forgetting already. 

Misty and I want to work together for the long run, and I'm already scared I'm going to tell her too much info and she'll figure out who I am.  On another note, I noticed the viewing lounge the other day and I wonder if Issy is playing in this, because she's in the VL.  I'm pretty sure she hates me?  We played Arabia together and I lied to her a lot and blindsided her a lot and I think it would be SO FUNNY if we were working together in this, I almost feel like maybe she's Mattie? Thinking back she reminded me of Issy a bit. 

Girl Idk but if we lose I'm voting off the biggest threat in our tribe now that's the tea!

I want Paul out tbh. Me/Bianca/Gabby/Mattie alliance would be the dream. I wanna take control of this tribe. Idk what has gotten into me but I wanna be like Sandra in Game Changers. If we lose, I do plan on making a fake account for Paul and making some fraudulent receipts of him saying he wants Gabby out................... Whatever it takes, you know?

i honestly keep forgetting im in this game! rip me! and also like i think im gonna start impersonating karen so people think I'm her

Nothing has happened yet

https://youtu.be/xB5CQqqra0o

Ummm, so ummm, unmmm, I have no idea what tribal will be like tomorrow

Note to self: NEVER PISS LOGAN OFF.  <3 Paul has got to go, I liked him better when his account wasn't working.  Also I think I figured out who he is because he kept putting a different name instead of Paul when we were doing the challenge.  I don't know that person outside of this game though and can't remember what he said his name was to save my life.   I hope that maybe Misty, Bianca, Mattie and I can vote together to get Paul out of this game, his smart mouth is going to ruin it for all of us.  He was also the more pissy person towards Mattie when she was messing up.  And true, I was lowkey annoyed with her too but then she told us she had dyscalculia and one of my friends has that, and I could see how this challenge could be difficult for her. We should have started it YESTERDAY, i felt like suggesting it but I just... never did.  UGH, I'm so ready for a switch or something, Panamint is dropping like flies and I just hope I'm in a good enough spot to stay another round. 

This tribe is?? Interesting I guess. We don't communicate like at all. Nobody answers pms (including me) and when we do it's like very vague and messy. Alex sends haha every other word and it makes it very hard to see if he's serious or not? I like Jenny she seems cool hopefully we can work together but the rest of this tribe idk 

We just lost.. and of course I was the only one to NOT participate. I'm sure I'm on the chopping block, because at this point I'm pretty sure there's no inactives to hide behind. I'm still gonna push for Paul to go home though. Maybe not be as aggressive as I planned to be.. but I will try to make it work. I trust in Bianca and Gabby so hopefully they keep me safe!

So we lost. Which I expected. And I originally thought I'd be the target, since I fucked up so much we kept having to go back. But Tanner never showed up to participate and everyone has to participate so we lost for that reason instead. Which means that I'm a little safer than I was before, and Tanner is most likely going home. I hope. I'm kind of glad he fucked up tbh, because I think we would've gone either way and now I get to be safe.

Now this is the truth tea and I can't wait to see all my devious villains with me at merge bc it's obvious the other two tribes are stupid enough to actually win a challenge *giggles* 

https://youtu.be/BS93E9_5f1o

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=lpsXJTPAOYE

I think everything is peaceful right now but I just hope everything isn't under the table and no one is targeting me.

Nobody wants to be the first person to throw out a name! It's so annoying! Nothing is happening! Wait, maybe they have an alliance *facepalm*

I dunno what I said last, but I think it was to the effect of I really suck at that flash game and I hope that the people on my tribe are better at it than I am. And... they were! They were actually a lot better than I was at it and I think one person (Alex maybe??) made up the difference of my failings https://media.tenor.co/images/9d06a86bdcd648c964e322559fdd3b80/tenor.gif We won the immunity challenge and avoided the first vote off of the season because that's what you do when you're immune I guess. Anyway, it looked like the Panamint tribe that did the worst decided to vote off their inactive player to increase their chances of success. I'm assuming this will be the strategy for most tribes moving forward anyway. https://s-media-cache-ak0.pinimg.com/originals/99/39/d8/9939d80aafd7f1217af815bd1f7ab42b.gif 

The reward challenge was the degrees of separation from Kevin Bacon thing that is always really fun - https://media.giphy.com/media/Ff2LmUUzZQAeY/giphy.gif I did the best I could at it so that I would look like an asset to my team... perhaps. Gotta plant those seeds that I'm of value so people will start inviting me to be part of their alliances and I'll become less likely to get the boot. We lost, but luckily it was just reward and then Kai went back to the Devil Hole to dig for an idol or something. So.. maybe Kai has an idol now? At the moment, I'm not too bothered because I don't think that I have given them any reason to play it.

Next challenge rolls its ugly head out of bed and I can see myself crying. I literally wanted to sit out of this one because I hate these types of challenges. They make my knees weak and my heart break. http://www.gifimagesdownload.com/wp-content/uploads/2016/02/Disgusted-cute-gif.gif It's a counting endurance challenge... WITH A TWIST ™ because you can only respond with odds on odd minutes and evens on even minutes... and I wasn't online to ask to sit out so I get to help count!! Rather than um... being a flop I decided to OVER DO so that people will want to pull me into potential future alliances since these challenges are the opportunity to bond over the fact that you hate your life. https://media.tenor.co/images/12ef9945086f38f2b314cdd6206fa1dc/tenor.gif

This dude named Tanner who Kai and some other people keep calling Eddie (suspicious?? I dunno, nor do I care tbh.. just weird honestly) didn't participate in the challenge at all and has more or less disappeared. http://www.reactiongifs.com/r/shrg-1.gif While concerning because people disappearing is not necessarily a good thing, it has made the first vote an easy target. Our tribe needs strength and somebody that we can't rely on to play is definitely the opposite of desirable. Also! Fun facts! Alex and I worked really closely and very consistently on this challenge and we shared with each other afterward that we were each equally glad to have someone to rely on throughout the thing... and then Alex did some weird alliance pitching thing that made me slightly uncomfortable. They were like.. "We could be more ;)" and I was like... stop with the wink face and just ask if I want to ally with you. It's giving me creeper vibes. https://m.popkey.co/98eb3f/1xWo0.gif So we decided to form an alliance and to pull in Wash as a third so that we will be able to control votes moving forward. I guess that'll be something... assuming it sticks and is successful and all of the other permutations are fun... also, given Jenny's chaotic nature she's probably going to out this alliance the moment she gets to a swap so she can stab them in the back.

I feel bad for not doing reward fuck i might go home fuck this

https://youtu.be/H4LrsvmlSAA

Ok, so episode 2 in a nut shell... Kat, William and I started a 3 person alliance called the Chaos Crew which is kinda cute I guess, hopefully since there are 3 people in the alliance it will secure them as a number more. Then we had the reward competition which was the wikipedia thing and my type A personality legit did the entire comp for our tribe. I really wanted us to win and have a possibility of being sent to satan's asshole. So we won!!!! And we got an idol clue :) also I convinced them to let me go to the hole. I decided thatd itd be smart to send the same people as last week because itd put a larger target on their back and if they found an advantage it would at least be in a known area.  Basicalllllly, I found this cute Zirusikisisiaasdas Idol which works as a normal idol but also randomly gives another person protection, but my ass tried and tell most people that I found nothing (a rock). This is good for the most part unless it chooses the person I am trying to idol out. Then we had the reward comp which was the ugliest fucking counting endurance comp ive ever had to do. So basically, Giruga, Justin, and I did the majority of the competition even though I was on a fucking road trip on mobile so that was wild. Layla legit did little to nothing which made the entire tribe kind of mad, thus theyd be an easy vote in a future tribal probs. I think Giruga and I working on this competition and communicating during it made was a lot more beneficial for our relationship... basically I suggested that we made a good team in the comp and I was wondering if he'd want to work together and he said yes!!! So im basically working with everybody on the fucking tribe whew. We won immunity because we are the only tribe to finish it which has me shook, but that means we have a significant advantage going into a future tribe swap or merge :). I have feeling that next episode is going to be a tribe swap, but we will see!

I was told to make a confessional. Also I'm going to make an alliance so if I'm gone you'll know why.

So....we lost....again. But it's no sweat this round because I have my alliance with Gabby and Misty, which gives us majority. I love a good majority. The plan is to vote out Paul because he is literally a mess and a half. After that disaster is handled, we can hopefully move forward and not have to go to tribal again. I'm really praying that I can go to Devil's Hole again because now that I have my glow stone i have better chances of maybe finding something that could really turn my game around. But who knows? Only time will tell

I swear, i'm a good egg, i'm going to make a confessional whenever i'm asked to. :o) Okay so....  I just got asked to join an alliance with Paul and Mattie...  now I'm going to have two alliances, how exciting is this gonna be. Time to start making some choices and hope for a swap because someone is going to know i was playing both sides soon! 

Well fuck me with an Iron Dildo I think it worked!

If I go home this round... I just........... It doesn't feel natural. I GUESS it's my fault for not being on skype all day yesterday/today but? I was busy. Whatever. If I stay, Mattie better watch the fuck out. They think they can vote me out? Surprise bitch

EP 2 EDGIC:

[survivormyanmar-blog]

Ep. #8 - “THEY HAD IT COMING” - Ashley

After being blindsided at Tribal Council, Ashley and Amanda started to plot their revenge.  With a new majority alliance of Jay and all of the men on the tribe formed (“Leftover Cuties”), Ashley and Amanda and their duo alliance “THEY HAVE IT COMING” came up with the idea of forming an all girls alliance.  After Tommy won Immunity, Brett and Tommy led the plan with the Leftover Cuties to take out Christian because they didn’t want an inactive player to be able to stay.  When Ashley and Amanda found out about this plan they told Christian and Ting Ting and were also able to rope in Leah in a plan to take out Brett.  With Jay being the last addition to the newly formed all female alliance called “KICK THE GUYS’ ASSES”, Jay had to decide if she wanted to stay with the men or join the women.  She ended up choosing the women and convincing Linus to come along with her and Brett was blindsided in a 7-4 vote.

a messy, messy, messy vote. I need to start stepping up my game. I’m serious; it’s kinda getting down to it. I need to be a little more strategically sound and not have random slip ups. I believe I’m in a good spot right now, but I need to keep pushing. I need to make moves!!!!

however, I am happy that other people want to play hard, too. It’s not just me that wants to go against people and make blindisides.

What an eventful night. First, Steffen is voted off. Which is amazing. Gotta give huge props to Jay, Sam and Linus for pulling off a beautiful blindside. Hopefully this marks the start of a wonderful alliance. Brett, Linus, Jay, Sam, Tommy and myself for final 6? Maybe. With a group of 6 against a group of 5, it’s looking promising. Anything can happen though. And then, the immunity challenge which Tommy won in about four seconds. Not really but damn did he finish fast. I guess the good thing is he’s on my side, so there isn’t much to worry about. As well, Ashley has been messaging me saying she doesn’t trust anyone, feels betrayed, doesn’t know what to do, etc. I don’t blame her, she was just on the wrong side of a massive blindside but all I can do is smile and sympathize with her. She could have worked with me earlier in the game but she chose not to. She dug her own grave and I’m not digging her out.

OKAY HERE WE GO. Who the HELL would just go around and spread literal shit all over the walls? Brett. Who is so tied up in this game that he can probably see his own asshole? Brett. Who is going to totally have it coming when he is voted out? Brett. Like come on dude, receipts are a thing. Smarten the hell up and make a call once in a while. In other news I am annoyed and shook that my buddy Steffen is gone. I am soooo pissed about Jay betraying us like that. It is clear to see that she will do ANYTHING to get where she wants. If that includes being so shoved up Sam’s ass and seeing his legit left ventricle, so be it. So now Amanda and I need to pull in the ranks for this next vote. Brett, Jay, or Sam need to fucking go. I don’t care who I have to take down along the way, they are leaving.

YES YES YES YES YES!!!!! My biggest threat went home! (Steffen) NOW I WON THE FIRST INDIVIDUAL IMMUNITY! It feels amazing and I just feel glorious. I’m super duper happy right now and can’t contain my excitement. With the individual immunity around my neck I feel like I want to take out someone this round that I feel otherwise will stick around for a while and negatively affect my game. This way I take the biggest chance with immunity around my neck so if someone goes it isn’t me. I can’t believe everything is falling into place! Of the eleven of us left I feel close to Jay, Sam, Brett, Linus, and Ting Ting the most. Followed by Keegen. That means my target this tribal is between Leah, Ashley, Amanda, and Christian. Leah is really into being a “free agent” plus her original tribe as a fan already makes her a target. Ashley/Amanda were totally blindsided and probably want to get Jay/Sam back which I understand but we have the numbers right now and I want to make sure Jay/Sam stay in my side so keeping Ashley/Amanda in another round is good for my game because it will keep them preoccupied. This leaves Christian who hasn’t spoken a single word to me in pms. Girl you didn’t come to play survivor if you don’t even talk to your tribemates in pms. I don’t want people dragging her to the end because she’s a goat. My plan for this round is to take her out because I don’t feel comfortable with her around. Then after this round I’ll go back to being my sweet old self a letting the “bigger” players such and Jay/Sam who think they are leading this 100% take care of Ashley/Amanda for the following rounds. That’s my plans for now.

And now The merry murderess of the Myanmar Camp in her rendition of….. The Cell Block Tango. Fuck! Loner! Squish! Uh uh, Base Camp, Linus! Fuck! Loner! Squish! Uh uh, Base Camp, Linus! Fuck! Loner! Squish! Uh uh, Base Camp, Linus! They have it coming, They have it coming They only have themselves to blame If you’d have been there, if you’d have seen it I betcha you would have done the same Fuck! Loner! Squish! Uh Uh, Base Camp, Linus! You know how people have these little habits That get you down? Like Sam Sam liked to mess things up, no, not mess, fuck So I come online this one night and there’s Sam Sittin’ at the bar messin’, no, not messin’, fuckin’ So, I said to him, I said “Sam, you fuck things up one more time” and he did… So I took the shotgun off the wall And I fired two warning shots INTO HIS HEAD He had it coming, he had it coming He only had himself to blame I met Jay Berghuis from Who Knows city about two weeks ago And she told me she was a loner and we hit it off right away So, we started working together She’d make the plans, She’d tell everyone, I’d make sure people saw them through, we’d bask in our greatness. Then I found out,  Loner, she told me LONER MY ASS Not only was she aligned, oh no, he had connections to everyone. One of those Mormons, you know So after tribal one night, when she came back to me I fixed her tea as usual You know, some gals just can’t hold their arsenic. She had it coming, she had it coming She took a friendship in its prime And then she used it and she abused it It was a murder but not a crime Now, I’m standing by the fire Carvin’ up the fish for dinner And in storms my acquaintance Keegan in a jealous rage “You were working with Nehe!” He says, he was crazy and he kept screamin’ “You were working with Nehe!” …….Then he ran into my knife He ran into my knife TEN TIMES If you’d have been there, if you’d have seen it I betcha you would have done the same My friend, Tommy and I had this double act And my buddy, Brett worked along with us For the last number in our act We voted out the naïve one One two three four five, splits, spread eagles Flip flops, back flips, votes right after the other Well, this one night we were at camp The three of us, we were in this shelter of leaves ricin’ and havin’ a few laughs and we ran out of water So I went out to get some I come back, open the door There’s Tommy and Brett Doing number seventeen, The Spread Eagle (Get it? Cuz he is so shoved up his ass) Well, I was in such a state of shock, I completely blacked out I can’t remember a thing, it wasn’t until later When I was washing the blood off my hands I even knew they were on jury They had it coming, they had it coming They had it coming all along I didn’t do it, but if I’d done it How could you tell me that I was wrong? I loved Nigel Linus more than I could possibly say, He was a real artistic guy, sensitive, a painter But he was always trying to find a scape goat He’d go out every night looking for one And on the way, he found immunity, Jay, and Samuel I guess you can say we broke up because of artistic differences He saw himself as alive and I saw him torched The dirty bum, bum, bum, bum, bum The dirty bum, bum, bum, bum, bum They had it comin’, they had it comin’ They had it comin’ all along ‘Cause if they used us and they abused us How could they tell us that we were wrong? They have it coming, they have it coming They only have themselves to blame If you’d have been there, if you’d have seen it I betcha you would have done the same You fuck things up one more time Loner my ass Ten times Number seventeen, the spread eagle Artistic differences I BETCHA YOU WOULD HAVE DONE THE SAME

Steffen left messages to Leah and Ting Ting to keep an eye out for the three that got him out, so hopefully Amanda and I can use this to our advantage to get them close with us and be votes for us. I swear to god if this doesn’t work I am going to scream.

Ashley: I love playing with ashley. She’s such a nice human bean and just a wonderful person. But i feel like she’s not as active as the rest of us and she doesn’t really participate in challenges so idk if she’s a threat…but you know who knows Brett: Seems chill. He’s a fan. haha fans make cool wind. chilly Christian: well. Jay: slightly more well than christian. steffen told me to be wary of her, linus, and sam bc apparently they’re all snakes but i like jay and hope we can work together and she won’t stab me in the back lol. love being paranoid Keegan: tbh i kinda forgot who you were. sorry. i’m really tired rn and the hosts are making me write this. still love you boo. but yeah you seem like a fun person but i would work on those painting skills. Leah: i wish i talked to you more often but you aren’t really chatting that much so it’s kinda the same as ashley. i don’t really know what to make of that. Linus: linus is really cool and it’s awesome that i actually got a chance to get to know him and become friends with him. Sam: YES SAM! WAY TO MAKE IT THROUGH TRIBAL! seamus and i were watching the tribal and we both cheered so yay! way to go. hopefully we’ll make it through life and stuff Tommy: damn that immunity challenge tho. way to goooooooo. cool eyes brochacho. Trevor: he seems nicer and i think it’s bc he read my last confessional. he’s still v lazy tho so overall still not a fan Owen: well. yikes. all i have to say.

On 12/16/16, at 11:46 PM, Trevor (FvF5 Host) wrote: > My fave favs! ^^JUST SO IN THE FUTURE THE REST OF YOU SHITHEADS KNOW ME AND ASHLEY ARE TREVORS FAVORITES me after this tribal: http://img.thesun.co.uk/aidemitlum/archive/01871/Britney__1871745a.jpg What i wanted to do at tribal: https://s-media-cache-ak0.pinimg.com/originals/0d/33/42/0d334211f007132e349423053db6fc7a.gif Me and Ashley are Britney, Jay is Ariana: http://sugarscape.cdnds.net/14/49/1417781776-arian19.png to sum it up: http://38.media.tumblr.com/6e5aa91901c65e583adb267f7ce7c108/tumblr_ncdrx5Qt3R1s2ynnio1_400.gif

It’s 5:31am, my boyfriend is snoring so loud I can’t sleep, and I’m officially considering myself the cracked queen of fvf 5. Ashley is pissed at me, which is lowkey surprising, and Amanda doesn’t actually seem to be, which is also lowkey surprising. It seems like literally everyone else is happy about the move we decided to make, so I think I definitely have people to work with going forward. Linus said he found my puzzle and won’t take me out, so I definitely trust him more and more every day. I just don’t want to make the same mistakes I did in Transylvania and let the people who are on the outs with me rise to power to snatch me.

I’m Hali on the beach right now: http://images.yuku.com.s3.amazonaws.com/image/gif/92c3990c0213481abc09dec938801451_r.gif

So Amanda, Leah and I still haven’t heard anything for this tribal. But everything usually happens the day of anyways. I am hoping Jay believes me when I say that I still trust her and am willing to work with her. Because depending on who she comes to me wanting out, I will cut her if I have to. I am hoping we can wrangle Christian and Ting Ting into our alliance so we at least have a solid five. If we can get Jay to vote with us this tribal we could get someone big(ish) out like Sam or Linus. Maybe even Brett. We will just have to see I guess.

I’ll be happy if I never see the words “icon” or “shook” after this game is over. I’m also over “queen.” That is all.

I wasted an idol lol.

hello everyone! I’m coming at you live from the USA’s limp dick–Florida! anyway back to game. On last vote, it was awesome that we were able to get Steffen out on only three votes because it would have been a lot more difficult to get all of that later. It certainly makes the game “easier” for a little bit; I’m not getting complacent, though. we’re voting christian tonight so unless she has something up her ass (and honestly more power to her), the vote should be pretty easy tonight. People are still a little wary of Amanda and Ashley, but I think it’s better to save them for later. Anyway I’m eating shake shack soon so bless up mofos.

The Outcast alliance, consisting of Brett, Linus, Jay, Sam, Tommy and myself are targeting Christian. Good plan, but Ashley was either told of the plan or just coincidentally guessed the vote, since she told Tommy she was voting Christian. We’re sticking with the plan, Jay and Tommy specifically said there’s no sense in worrying and I agree. I think it’s unlikely Christian has an idol. But we’ll see. As long as the vote isn’t me, I’m happy

Someone information has come to light. Apparently there’s talks of a girls alliance forming. The rest of the girls are trying to sway Jay to their side. Kinda last minute, they’re just struggling to find some way to get a majority. I trust enough in Jay that she will stick with us

All girls alliance! Fuck yes. Look at me attempting to save my ass. This is pretty great and I am hoping the vote for Brett tonight actually works. His ass needs to go. He keeps thinking he is in control and every time he speaks in the tribe chat I want to pull out my eyeballs. Like tbh. He is spreading too much crap and I don’t need the whole world knowing about Amanda and I.

Well, I’m at a crossroads. I have a six person majority alliance with all the guys on the tribe and another separate six person majority alliance with the girls on the tribe. The guys are targeting Christian and the girls are targeting Brett, so I could go either way at this point. I don’t want to wake up with half of the tribe hating me tomorrow, so I may just throw my vote toward someone random and force a revote and then potentially rocks. This is the scariest position I’ve ever been in on tumblr survivor. I hate that this is the vote that going to define my game and I barely even had a choice in being shoved in the middle. Tomorrow, everything is going to be different with people I’ve been working with for a long time, regardless of which way I go. This is a lot. A lot. Linus has kind of become my #1 ally in the game since it seems like Tommy may have a bigger mouth and more connections than I thought, so I’ve been telling him pretty much everything and he’s comfortable flipping on Brett with me. Ugh. Ugh. Ugh. Stay tuned, buckaroos.

I sure am glad we don’t play this game on like messenger or something. I seem to lie about reading messages a lot 😅😂

So, last minute  on the vote today it’s brought  to light that  a girls alliance wants  to vote out Brett instead of Christian. Jay came to me to say that she  felt like it may be in her best interest to make the jump. I really don’t feel the most comfortable with jumping on board with a womans alliance, especially since last time I checked I am very much not a woman. However, Jay is my closest ally far and away, and I think she already kind of had her mind set on this jump, so my options were to keep her as an ally and maybe find some new friends, or vote in the minority and lose her trust, so the choice seemed obvious. The truth is my current alliance is sinking, and boy do I not want to swim. So, with that, oh great king of Mata, I bid you ado.

so i finally found the perfect gif for me when steffen got voted out: http://wwwimage.cbsstatic.com/thumbnails/photos/files/asset/10/00/43/94/fbb11cd670f6f1e8_survivor_33_hannah_cant_even.gif BUT YOU KNOW WHAT https://49.media.tumblr.com/6d3fbe5cd1f6e6ad5bf57ac766bf44eb/tumblr_nmiv55gTcN1qhktavo1_250.gif Ashley and I pulled our asses up and got ourselves working and got a group together of all the girls  and the plan is to vote for Brett. I hope this goes as planned cause this would totally flip the game and itd be iconic. As usual though i dont feel safe until tribals done so WE’LL SEE http://49.media.tumblr.com/0a76f378bc9b81ab8012f9ba6558f009/tumblr_nkeojciu3U1sqbiv1o7_400.gif

Brett, The Day After I am very proud of how I played this game. I certainly have things that I feel I could have done better at and moments that might have led to my downfall, but all in all, I did way better than I thought I was going to. I really thought my game was over the second ADRIAN got voted out from AMANDA’s vote advantage, so the fact that I was able to last one more week after that was such a gift. It’s a really fun game and I’m very grateful that I got the opportunity to play it. The plan was to get rid of CHRISTIAN. I felt it was a good move so that no one would be tempted to take her as a goat as well as having it be a respect move for everyone actually playing the game. People tell me CHRISTIAN’s a nice person. I wouldn’t know. She’s completely inconsequential to this game. I really hope she makes the finals now because it will really help me narrow down who to vote for. I’m not quite sure what happened, which is kind of wonderful when you think about it. I figured the other side would pick me as a target. I felt like I had 5 votes coming my way, especially after the other side tried to recruit JAY in the LAZIEST attempt at women’s alliance I’ve ever seen. Unfortunately, two members from my alliance–I’m assuming SAM and TOMMY, but can’t be sure–flipped and voted me out. I don’t have any ill will towards anyone that flipped on me, even if it was KEEGAN or LINUS or JAY. I think most of everyone in there could recognize I was a formidable player and that I should be dealt with sooner rather than later. I actually think that’s my largest game flaw–I made no attempt to dumb myself down. I’m very well written (and humble to boot) and I like to have intellectual conversations about the nature of the game to other people. I think these people liked those conversations, but knew they couldn’t let me anywhere near a jury or near the position to overthrow their grander schemes. I really felt like 6th place was the best I was going to do. I’m thrilled to at least have made the jury. That’s kind of cool. And now the minimal amount of stress I had about this game is now reduced to absolutely nothing. That’s not so bad either. I originally signed up for this game because the last one I played was 7-8 years ago. I was a teenager then. I was a lot more anxious then. I think when you’re younger, you’re more likely to do well because the pool of players is mostly around your age, but it’s an advantage to play when you’re older (unless you’re CAROLINE or MARANDA) because you have so much more going on for you and it’s not the end of the world if something doesn’t go your way. I was more successful in my placement(s) as a teenager, but I feel like my gameplay is stronger now, oddly enough–even sitting here at 11th Place. It’s easier to seem non-threatening when you’re still a child, more or less! Going into jury, I really got along with STEFFEN well and so I was looking forward to spending more time with him. To my surprise, STEFFEN is obnoxious if he’s not “ON” in the game. He’s warm and charismatic to get himself further in the game, but now that he’s out, he has no fucks to give and he’s just saying one irritating thing after another. Oh and there’s nothing WORSE than when someone gripes about twists and how if the hand had been dealt differently, he would have survived and it’s just like: WELCOME TO SURVIVOR. That’s literally how this game works. I’m sure ADRIAN is thinking “If only the swap came one vote later.” I’m sure NEHE & KRYSTEN are thinking “If only both tribes didn’t have to go to tribal council that night I got sent home.” That’s just how it is. You can’t get mad at something that was pre-meditated months ago. He just seems really immature. We are, of course, both rooting for different people to succeed. We can agree to disagree on that. He just comes off as kind of a loser to me now. But that’s the case with most of these players, so he shouldn’t feel singled out. There are nine players left in the game and one CPU level 1 that no one wants to eliminate for some reason. Let’s break them down, shall we? AMANDA is a good player. I would definitely consider voting for her to win if she makes it to the end. She’s been mostly smart with very few missteps. And she’s been alright to talk to. ASHLEY is an average player drowning in her own immaturity. I can’t see myself voting for her to win this game at all and it really just comes down to the temper tantrum she threw when STEFFEN was voted out. “If anyone wants to let me know what just happened, I’ll be online.” How infuriating. Get off your lazy, bitter ass and go talk to people instead of sitting around feeling sorry for yourself! Also, I don’t know why players do this, but it’s beyond annoying when people feign this “Oh I’m so worried it’s going to be me! I don’t know what to do!” Just stop. You’re embarrassing everyone. Go away. JAY is a sweet, sweet girl. And I think she’s playing as well as she can with the hand she’s been dealt. I don’t think she’ll make it to the end, but I commend her for killing it this far. KEEGAN is such a wonderful person. It would take a miracle for me to not vote for him if he made it to the end. I’m worried that I’ll be seeing him next based on the current situation, but I know that he has the strategic chops and challenge prowess to knock everyone else out of the game if he focuses and makes very calculated, purposeful moves. I have so much faith in him. I really want him to win this. LEAH is easily the largest disappointment in my Survivor: Myanmar experience. She’s not playing a good game at all. She just had a massive advantage when the game began of having pre-existing relationships with STEFFEN and AMANDA that presented a pretty uneven playing field, if you ask me. It really jeopardized the authenticity of this whole season to have a “fan” that’s good friends with two of the “favorites.” Had she not had those pre-existing relationships, she wouldn’t have gravitated towards those two naturally, not when they’re on the other tribe originally and not when she wouldn’t have even met AMANDA until the merge. If she gets to the end, it’ll be very hard for me to vote for her as well because she started the game with a rather large handicap. If you set the game on EASY mode, I’m not going to appreciate it when you sit next to two people who had a more difficult road to travel at the finale. My biggest mistake in this game is that I had a major hunch at the very beginning of the game that LEAH was going to work with the favorites because of how many people in the community were well wishing her pre-game. I voiced my concerns to KEEGAN and several others. It fell on deaf ears more or less, but it’s ultimately my fault. When CARLOS was voted out, I could have used social capital to get rid of LEAH and I didn’t because NEHE was a ticking time bomb that favored LEAH and I didn’t want to stick my neck out too far as a leader. Whatever place LEAH ends up finishing, she really shouldn’t be proud. If it’s ASHLEY, CHRISTIAN, and LEAH in the final three, ASHLEY gets my vote 100%. LINUS is a sweetie. And he has so much potential. I really hope that he can rise above his current predicament and cause a major upset. I know he’ll be an asset to KEEGAN and perhaps they’ll find an idol in the coming rounds. For being a teenager, LINUS was very easy to communicate with and has intelligence far beyond his years. I’m excited to see how he plays from here. SAM is one to watch out for. If my gut is correct, he’s engineered the demise of the first two members of the jury. STEFFEN doesn’t have any respect for it because STEFFEN plays a million ORGs at once and has no awareness, but I appreciate SAM’s go-for-it gameplay underneath his calm and mild exterior. He could win this, but I hope he doesn’t Aubry Bracco it–he’s not really seen as this major player among the rest of Toga Tata. He’s a bit too far behind the scenes. I see him, but does anyone else? TING TING is adorable and she’s really done no wrong this far into the game. We never talked strategy, but neither of us really had a use for the other, so it’s understandable. I think she’s becoming a real contender as the days pass by! TOMMY is such a roller coaster of a player. He has personality quirks that made for a very poor first impression with me. When I needed to work with him, however, I found that he can actually be very endearing, too. He’s not all mess and he has some tremendous ideas. I think he was the one who seemed the most conflicted about whether to vote me out or not. I hope he doesn’t regret it coming up. In fact, I’m most intrigued to discover the fates of SAM and TOMMY because their games are the most adventurous of the bunch. A lot of players don’t care for TOMMY at all. If he’s in the finals with anyone that isn’t KEEGAN, I’ll more than likely vote for him to win. I’m wishing him luck. So that’s it! Now I’m in jury with STEFFEN and while I really hope that someone cooler comes to Ponderosa for me to interact with, I would love for it to be AMANDA, ASHLEY, CHRISTIAN, or LEAH. That would be phenomenal. I’ll find out tomorrow evening, it seems. And lastly, to anyone who reads my confessionals and is upset that I referred to you as annoying or “Cookie Monster” or anything else, you really shouldn’t put much stock in my words at all. I don’t know you–and if I’ve used such words about you, I probably don’t want to know you. After this game, I’ll probably leave with one friend or two and not want to deal with the rest of you again. It’s not game bitterness. It’s just that in my daily life, I tend to avoid Disney freaks and people who live in their mother’s basement watching Big Brother live feeds whose greatest life decision is what flavor Big Gulp to get from 7-Eleven. I wish everyone that played this game happiness–I just truly believe for most that that happiness does not include me as a fixture in their life. My happiness certainly doesn’t include them. I don’t expect this to make me popular with the “VL,” but I was never really concerned with being anyone other than myself. The end.