#this is my comprehensive author interview apparently

[sineala]

I subscribe to the newsletter of an author I like who wrote a book about 9/11 and the War on Terror and the security state in the US and how it led to the election of Trump, and it's all very serious but apparently the author is writing an Iron Man comics series. I don't read the comics, and a lot of what I know about them comes from your fic, so I'm honestly not sure how much fanon vs canon knowledge I have. 😂 But the series sounds like it might be interesting I think? The author talked about it in his newsletter today. (This link should work. Probably.)

https://www.forever-wars.com/iron-man-how-to-blow-up-a-pipeline-succession/

I am actually really excited about this run! I try not to get excited about new Iron Man runs because chances are high that my hopes and dreams will be crushed, and I know that just because someone writes, say, stunningly excellent non-fiction, it is not a guarantee that they will be great at writing fiction at all or superhero comics specifically (cf. Ta-Nehisi Coates on Cap), but judging by everything Spencer Ackerman's been saying in interviews, his run sounds like it's going to explore a lot of interesting themes.

The post you linked links to an AIPT podcast that he was on a few days ago to talk about his new Iron Man run. For those of you who don't listen to podcasts (this is also me), the Iron Man subreddit has what seems like a fairly comprehensive summary of the interview, and I am really looking forward to the run. Issue #1 apparently hits stores on October 23.

But I will tell you why I am actually now really excited about this run. It's not relevant to anything about the comic itself. I am nonetheless very excited.

Last month, after he was announced as the new Iron Man writer, in order to hype up his run, he posted an offer on his blog: if you add the run to your pull list, and you email him proof that you're pulling his run and include a snail-mail address, he will mail you some cool Iron Man stickers.

I eventually got around to doing this last week. I was assuming he didn't actually pay attention to any of these emails so I dashed off a couple sentences about how I was looking forward to his take on Tony because he'd posted a photo of the Iron Man comics he was reading for research and several of them were among my favorites. And then I went off to get bagels.

By the time I had come back with bagels, twenty minutes later, he'd written me a very nice reply substantively engaging with the content of my extremely off-the-cuff message -- geez, if I'd known he was going to be actually reading them I would have put a lot more thought into it, you know? It was very kind and I was not expecting it.

He spelled my first name wrong in the reply, despite it being in the email header and also the name I had signed the email with.

This happens to me a lot. I have a first name that is very common in a lot of languages, but none of those languages are English. I'd say there's a 50-50 chance that a native English speaker will spell or pronounce my name wrong. This is unfortunate, because I live in the US and mostly interact with native English speakers. (My wife @lysimache immediately knew how to pronounce my name. I mean, it wasn't why I married her or anything, but I feel like it was a big plus on a personal level.)

If I have to give my name for something, I will reflexively spell it. The second-to-last time I voted, they'd switched voter lookup to you giving them your name rather than you giving your street address, which was a surprise that filled me with dread. My wife was in line ahead of me and she was completely finished voting by the time the poll workers had finished correctly spelling my name. (The last time I voted, I just handed them my ID, which is not required in my state, but I really wanted this to go faster.) I went to the doctor last week, and when they called my name in the waiting room, they said it wrong. I corrected them. They said it differently wrong a couple minutes later. I corrected them again. They said it wrong again. At that point I gave up.

(If I could think of a name I liked better that I was absolutely sure that most people could spell and pronounce, I would change my name. I still have not found one.)

So, you know, I'm used to it. It happens. Frequently. I was not at all surprised that he spelled it wrong.

He then emailed me again to apologize for spelling my name wrong. Like, immediately. One minute later. He said he was sorry and he knew a lot of people with a similar name.

Dude. Nobody does that. Nobody actually apologizes. Especially not in an email to a rando like me. He did not need to do that. At all. I was not expecting him to do that. He did that. I was honestly touched. No one bothers to do that. But he did.

I got my stickers in the mail yesterday.

I have redacted the portion of the note that has my name in it, but he absolutely spelled my name correctly.

Mr. Ackerman, sir, I hope your comic sells a million copies.

[philosophiesde]

Zoomposium with Manfred Rumpl: “In the footsteps of Schrödinger - Or how much philosophy does physics contain?”

1. Information about the people

In another very exciting interview from our Zoomposium themed blog “Physics and its limits”, Axel, our guest interviewer Christian Bührig and I talk to the Austrian author, educator and philosopher Manfred Rumpl about his 2015 book “Travelers in Relativity”, which traces the life of the Austrian physicist and scientific theorist Erwin Schrödinger. We were made aware of Mr. Rumpl through a tip from Christian, who has already dealt a lot with the scientific history of “quantum physics” on his philosophy and science blog “Akademie Olympia” and privately and can be considered a proven specialist and expert on “Schrödinger's quantum mechanics”. We therefore invited him to our Zoomposium as a guest interviewer.

2. content of the novel “Travelers in Relativity” or “How much philosophy does physics contain”

“Erwin Schrödinger, Nobel Prize winner for physics and companion of Albert Einstein, is driven by a great dream: the dream of truthfulness and truth, the fusion of physics and metaphysics. He is an eternal seeker, driven by his desire for knowledge as well as his love of women: He desires many, seduces many - and there is always Anny, his wife, who forgives him everything. His obsession with the 'Theory of Everything', a comprehensive description of the innermost world, which he began to think of together with Albert Einstein, never let him go on his restless journey from one continent to the next, accompanied by social scandals, until his deathbed.” (https://www.picus.at/produkt/reisende-in-sachen-relativitaet/, emphasis added) And it was precisely on this very exciting and very important topic of the possibility of the “fusion of physics and metaphysics” that we talked to Mr. Rumpl, who, thanks to his in-depth research and philosophical training, was able to explain some interesting things about Schrödinger and his approaches to the philosophy of science. In his novel, for example, he has Schrödinger say: “That the world is governed at its core by chaos, probability and chance, which can only be grasped statistically, remains an assertion based on a need for explanation, not scientific knowledge.” (S. 163)

This naturally raises the question of the status of “quantum mechanics” in modern physics, which has not yet been finally clarified, and the associated controversies since the “Copenhagen interpretation”. Some essays by Jürgen Uphoff on this topic, e.g. “Quantum Theory - Methodological Critique” (https://philosophies.de/index.php/2024/03/07/die-quantentheorie/) or “Justification of Quantum Mechanics” (https://philosophies.de/index.php/2024/09/09/begruendung-der-quantenmechanik/), have already appeared on my site and have also been the subject of controversial discussion in my comments section.

This perhaps shows how inconsistently modern physics deals with the “problem of quantum physics” and how urgent a “new metaphysics” would actually be at this point. However, as we are apparently still miles away from this, a fictional approach to the problem may be more appropriate. We were also able to interview Mr. Rumpl on this and other topics. More at: https://philosophies.de/index.php/2024/09/29/auf-den-spuren-schroedingers/

or: https://youtu.be/dog0JehRdlE

[treeremovalpensacola]

Communication Coach: How AI is transforming SEO and what you need to do about it

If you live in Pensacola, it's just a matter of time that you have to do the inevitable and remove a tree. Tree Services Pensacola is a tree removal company that specializes in stump grinding, tree removal, and arborist services. They have been in business for over 10 years and have the experience and expertise to get the job done right. Fully licensed and insured, so you can rest assured that your property is in good hands. Pensacola tree service is a company that specializes in removing trees. They have been doing this for over 10 years and they are really good at it. They also do stump grinding, which means they get rid of the stump left behind after the tree is removed. They are fully licensed and insured, so you can be sure that your property is in good hands. When you think of SEO (Search Engine Optimization), the first thing that usually comes to mind is keywords. As they suggest, keywords have long been the key to successful SEO campaigns. Google has suggested for years that human language is also a leading SEO factor. There has been little evidence to support that, but now it couldn’t be more obvious. AI summaries (Google calls them overviews) are now prioritized at the top of the page above Google ads and other search results. This apparent sabotage of its lucrative ad revenue is evidence Google expects to aggressively compete for AI leadership. Traditional SEO, as it’s practiced today, optimizes website pages and other content to rank in search results. The path to that goal has been content that demonstrates relevance and authority. That’s still valid, but the AI evolution takes a more humanized approach. We are moving away from keywords toward more comprehensive solutions that signal relevance. Communicate Your Brand Strengths The surest way to excel with AI-influenced SEO is by focusing on your brand distinction. It tells people why they should care about your business. A great brand stands in for people’s inability to accurately communicate what makes it special. In a world where quality has risen to breathtaking levels, brand differentiation signals relevant qualities that people desire. Lululemon, Apple and Tesla are just a few brands that signal affluence, style and social attractiveness. Let’s be clear about one thing. Before AI entered the picture, social media transformed SEO. It gave consumers a collective voice that’s more powerful than that of any brand. Look to your customers for ways to communicate your distinctions. One of our practices at True Nature Marketing is independently interviewing our clients’ customers. They tend to be open and share the truth about their providers’ strengths and weaknesses. Embedded in your customers’ social media comments are invaluable signals for shaping your brand marketing. As this trend unfolds, you can expect them to show up in AI-generated search results. To better understand how this works, look at how Amazon product reviews have changed. You’ll now find one summary of all reviews, both positive and negative, at the top of the review section. Amazon is moving toward basic conversational language to communicate relevant signals that will speed up buying decisions. Thus, your SEO efforts should take a similar approach to help AI platforms recommend your business solutions. My suggestion is to sit down with your team to discuss what your customers are saying. Do they tell their friends your company is expensive but worth it? That’s not a bad signal to own for a residential company serving affluent customers. As AI continues to evolve, businesses will discover they have to meet customers where they are. The upside of this shift is its potential to simplify your marketing. Getting it right will bring you closer to your customers. How they communicate your true brands strengths is what matters most. The post Communication Coach: How AI is transforming SEO and what you need to do about it first appeared on Landscape Management.

[uglierdaikon]

I’ve been waiting 👀 Wings 1, 2, 5, 10

Graves 1,2, 4 (in this case a second sequel I mean) 5, 10

BSMFH 1, 4, 5

I want you to know this was actually restraint 👀❤️

Dana you dweeb (affectionate). All right here we go. (Spoilers ahead for all three fics)

Wings

1)  Any deleted scenes from this fic that didn’t make it into the final story?

Well I did do those Wings spin-off one shots, which I never actually finished posting. Maybe I will someday. Those were mainly about Amane and Tsukasa (y'know, before all the murdering). Other than that, I just reread my outline and apparently I planned for Nene and Teru to be considered missing for a while before their bodies were found? Which obviously I did not end up going with, since Amane turned himself in/immediately tried to kill himself. Fun times.

2) Was there an alternative ending for this fic you had in mind?

Nope (unless you include the "Teru and Nene being considered missing" thing). The plot of this fic was ripped off entirely from a song, so I had rules to follow! The ending was decided for me by Colter Wall. Poor things never had a chance at a happy ending.

5 If you were to go back and change anything a scene, a way anything was written, a piece of dialogue etc. What would you change from this fic?

I wouldn't write it. KIDDING! I'm kidding (mostly). I don't think I've ever hidden the fact that Wings is (in my opinion) the worst thing I've written in years, so honestly the list is too long to bother with. I know a lot of people really liked it, and I won't bash on anyone's taste and I so greatly appreciate the support that it got/has continued to get but I just... don't like it. I didn't even have fun writing it. Bleh.

10 How long did it take for you to write this fic?

Well, it was posted on October 15, 2020, and the last chapter was posted on November 30, 2020. So, roughly a month and a half? I posted every chapter as soon as it was finished, so the timeline of all of my multichapter fics (except for BSMFH) is always gonna be what it says on paper.

Graves

1)  Any deleted scenes from this fic that didn’t make it into the final story?

Sorry to disappoint, but no! Not that I can remember.

2) Was there an alternative ending for this fic you had in mind?

Also no 😂 Graves is exactly the fic I set out to write. Honestly, though, the ending was so hard to come up with. I can't imagine how much harder it would've been to come up with a whole different one. I remember being really pissed with myself because I'd kind of written myself into a corner and didn't know how to fix it. Figured it out in the end though!

4) Hypothetically if you were to make a sequel to this fic…What is a story you would think of? A sequel? A prelude? A time skip? Etc. Just any thoughts you might have for it?

I... wouldn't? Just to be completely honest. The only ideas I ever had were for Hananene wedding/Mitsukou finally getting together, and I did that in the sequel! There were a couple wedding traditions I didn't end up using for the sequel fic though, such as the groom being "kidnapped" by the bride's family (in this case, Teru and Kou) and having to find his way back to the bride by the wedding. That would've been funny as hell but it didn't fit the tone of the story I ended up writing.

5) If you were to go back and change anything a scene, a way anything was written, a piece of dialogue etc. What would you change from this fic?

Absolutely nothing. This fic is my pride and joy.

10) How long did it take for you to write this fic?

From April 26, 2020, to September 13, 2020. So... about 4 and a half months!

Be Still My Foolish Heart

1)  Any deleted scenes from this fic that didn’t make it into the final story?

Dana I am absolutely shocked that you would give me the opportunity to share the bar scene with the world! It's not exactly a deleted scene, but I know exactly what happened with Kou and Amane at the bar the night they ended up coming home drunk together (and Dana knows too). Since the fic is from Nene's perspective, though, we won't be seeing it (unless I decide y'all deserve a treat).

4) Hypothetically if you were to make a sequel to this fic…What is a story you would think of? A sequel? A prelude? A time skip? Etc. Just any thoughts you might have for it?

Let me start off by saying there will not be a sequel. I'm not trying to get anyone's hopes up. But there has been a joke within my heart that I desperately wish I could make, and if I ever did write a sequel it would solely be so that I could make this joke. Let me set the scene. Nene and Amane have an ill-advised tumble on the pull-out couch in a moment of passion. Nene gets pregnant. What is the joke, you may ask? Easy. "The couch may pull out but Amane sure doesn't."

That is easily the best answer I've given in this whole post and it's a damn shame 99% of people will just scroll past this because it's too long. Anyways I'll see myself out (after the last question).

5) If you were to go back and change anything a scene, a way anything was written, a piece of dialogue etc. What would you change from this fic?

Nothing yet? I would do some tweaking to the Hanako and Kana scenes I suppose, for reasons I can't disclose at this time. I've also gone a while without any conflict between Amane and Nene, and I feel like they should argue more. But c'est la vie. I trek onwards.

God damn, Dana, you get your fill boo? Teasing, teasing. Thank you for asking!

[jecook]

Dabihawks Fanfic Recs

I was recently asked what my favorite dabihawks fic is, and I'm really terrible at picking favorites, so I scrolled through my bookmarks and picked out some of my all-time favorites. This list is certainly not comprehensive and also skips anything in the variety of <5k rated E (if you know what I mean ;) ) and also skips the fact that I generally go "I have this author in my bookmarks so if I want more of their work I can just go there" (stupid, short cited.) Anyway, preamble done, these are (a few) of my personal faves in order of when I opened the tab while scrolling through bookmarks.

(Part 2)

By Any Other Name by SatelliteBlue

200k, Ongoing, Series

Through some freak accident of the universe, Dabi has been invited to compete on The Bachelorette. Have they actually seen his face? Surprisingly yes, and they still want him. For this season they apparently need a ‘bad boy’ to both balance out the hero contestant (why in hell is Hawks involved?) and to trash talk the show in interviews to appeal to audiences who don’t like the scripting. Getting sent on a vacation away from his annoying bandmates to complain and eat as much free food as he wants? Sold.

This fic is still ongoing and long but so so worth it. It's hilarious. The story follows Dabi and Hawks on the show, but also ends each week on the show by switching to everyone watching the show back at home. The plot is so much more than the Bachelorette, too, but to explain how so would spoil some of the fun. Everyone is not only perfectly in character, but the conflicts are also just amazingly executed. I can't recommend this fic enough and I am soooo excited to see how it comes together. The twists have been incredible so far and I'm curious to see how it all comes together.

The bird and the bees by Vridelian (@vriddy)

1k, Completed

Hawks may be a garden-stealing gnomehead, but that doesn't mean Dabi will just let him get kidnapped, right under Dabi's nose. A rescue mission told in 100 words drabbles.

What it says on the tin--this fic is short and cute. Vri has a lot of amazing works, but this is the one I read when I'm sick or sleepy. It's like watching your favorite kid's movie when you're down. Also, she's probably going to laugh at me for picking this fic of all her fics to rec or kill me <3

steal your heart by darlingest (@darlingestwrites)

60k, Completed

When infamous thief Hawks announces that he is going to steal the heart of Endeavor's son, everyone expects him to prey on Shoto Todoroki - nobody suspects Touya to be the actual target.

This was one of those fics that even when I dropped off reading dabihawks for a few months, I still consumed every chapter like my life depended on it. They are a delightful mix of flirty and slightly unhealthy in the way good enemies to lovers should be. Also, the end of some of these chapters really left me sweating, and the fic is a nice length, too for long but not too long a read

we could be antiheroes by caandlelit (@caandlelit)

6k, Completed

‘Well. There was this study on intimacy,’ he begins, and Dabi interrupts him, ‘I’m gonna call security if you don’t shut up with that gay shit.’

or; exes sit in a jail cell and tackle 36 questions in order to stop the war

This fic is both hilarious and thoughtful, a favorite mix of mine. Short and excellently paced, I think about this one a good deal.

There and Back Again - A Villain's Tale by Todoroki Touya by RavenHawk

187k, Completed

Quirk History was a mandatory subject in every junior, middle and high school in the world, and Todoroki Touya didn't sleep through his whole education - he'll have you know he almost finished it, too. So he shouldn't be quite so dumbfounded by the news, if, say, he was so fucking stupid as to let the Number 2 Pro Hero in Japan hit it raw in an alleyway in Hiroshima. Really, he should be mature and take responsibility for his own mistakes. Alternatively, he's going to roast a pigeon and feed it to the Hero Commission. And then, have a completely new kind of mental breakdown because he's not ready to be a single parent.

I don't really read mpreg, but man I read RavenHawk's work. They are a phenomenal writer and so so prolific, I could recommend everything they've written. This fic is a beautiful love story and a really wonderful arc for Touya <3

Bamboo arrows and mourning hearts by TheyCallMeBol (@theycallmebol)

5k, Completed

Guard Captain Keigo has been visiting First Prince Touya's grave every single night for almost 7 years now. And no hooded sad excuse of a grave robber is going to stop him now. Or: a not slowburn at all of Guard Captain Keigo and the creepy but oddly charming grave-robber.

Short and beautiful, this fantasy AU is just what the heart needs. Not sure what to say about it other than that you could read it in half an hour, so you should just read it now.

my heart goes vroom vroom boom by crimsonseekers (@crimsonseekers)

5k, Completed, Series

“Right!” Hawks said, perking up. “I gotta be a good brother-in-law, I need to become the favorite Todoroki.” “Well, focus on the end of the season, then you can focus on overtaking my spot as the clear and unsurpassable favorite.” Hawks clicked his tongue and rolled his eyes, slouching back in his chair. He opened his mouth to respond just as the waiter came over. “The season’s basically over anyway. ‘S like you said, it’s not as if there’s a big chance of some massive upheaval this late, y’know?”

or, Dabi and Hawks are Formula One drivers. Crashes aren't anything too out of the usual in their profession, nothing too life-threatening, except when they suddenly are.

This is beat for beat an adaptation of a real event, so I suggest reading the fic, adoring it, and then looking up the video + the driver's interview about it afterward. Crim did an a m a z i n g adaptation of what he went through, and it makes for a perfect oneshot.

This feels like a nice number of fics, but I have another seven open in my other tabs still, so I will stop here and make a second post. Let me know if this is something people would want more of from me! Remember to leaves kudos + comments if you read these <3

[impetuous-impulse]

Two Victor Biographies

Recently, I have come across two biographies on Marshal Victor. The first is Le Maréchal Victor (2004) by Jacques Le Coustumier; the second is Le Maréchal Victor: loyal sous Napoléon, fidèle sous le Restauration (2006) by Jean-Pierre Tarin. What is interesting about the two biographies is that they were written for the same person during the same time, when there was (apparently) a dearth of current historiography on Victor.

At a first glance and without having read them in full, both biographies seem to be rather pro-Victor than critical of him (which is understandable, given there are choicer individuals to write critically about in the Revolutionary and Napoleonic eras). The Le Coustumier biography goes out on a limb in that regard—in an interview with the author, he mentions himself to be inspired by his common origins with Victor, both having lived in the Vosges. His methodologies included “work[ing] as a gold panner, searching for little nuggets of gold”, collecting various documents related to victor and consulting Victor’s descendants. From this description, his biography seems more like a work of passion than a historical text. It was published by the Fondation Napoleon in what I assume was an effort to promote popular Napoleonic-era research, and indeed, the author claims to be a vetenarian rather than a historian. However, as it is the first comprehensive biography on Victor written in this century, perhaps it will yield valuable findings about Victor’s character, even if it does not contain much historiography.

The second biography by Tarin seems more balanced, promising a targeted study on Victor’s overall personality. The author’s blurb says he is a specialist historian of the first Empire, with publications esteemed by the Fondation Napoleon. Being published second, Tarin also has hindsight in avoiding the errors of the Le Coustumier’s biography. Of Le Coustumier and his methods, Tarin writes, “I have never known a biographer that has ever found such a catalogue of errors, sometimes even nonsense, about a historical figure.” (The drama! "Spilling tea" right in the preface!) The errors he cites largely involves the geneaology of Victor’s parents and descendants and questionable career mixups (perhaps not unexpected for an amateur?). Tarin also admits shortcomings he cannot cover—numerous “black holes” in Victor’s life, especially concerning his marriage and addresses. Perhaps this book will balance the other out and offer a more holistic assessment of Victor.

This is a bit late for Victor's birthday, but if time permits and as long as I have them, I would like to make my way through the books, and share interesting tidbits on this blog. (Maybe I can convince myself to do it for the sake of practicing my rusty French…)

[greensaplinggrace]

“how could you ship Darklina knowing she based it off of her abusive relationship?”

By educating myself about the origins of this rumor and learning that it’s false! By scouring the internet for a time wherein she explicitly stated it was based off her abusive relationship and coming up with nothing. By finding only the most obscure posts and references in interviews that talk about how her relationship at the time of creating Shadow and Bone caused her depression. 

So no, Darklina actually wasn’t based on Leigh Bardugo’s abusive relationship. That’s a rumor.

It is also in incredibly bad taste to use a real person’s history with trauma as a way to harass fans of her novel. I honestly can’t believe the amount of times I’ve seen her history dredged up for an anti’s chance to “get one over” on a shipper. And I’m honestly appalled by the amount of times this argument has been raised against other, real life, actual abuse survivors who ship Darklina. 

“how could you ship Darklina knowing she based it off of her abusive relationship?”

By acknowledging also that fiction is a work meant for thousands. By remembering that any personal experiences an author puts into a novel are not universal. That every fan is different and will have lived extremely different lives from her. That expecting them all to read the same message in her story is impossible, especially since it’s one very specific to Leigh Bardugo’s own private life. 

By exposing myself to the entirety of the fandom and not just one echo chamber, by seeing posts about how some people are triggered by Darklina and other people are triggered by Malina. By realizing that the world isn’t black and white, that everybody is going to be coming into this with their own baggage and traumatic experiences, that Leigh Bardugo, in putting this book out there for the entire world to see, gave every reader the chance to see something different and unique and personal in her words. By remembering that fiction is not reality, and that reality is the people behind the pages and behind the screens.

“how could you ship Darklina knowing she based it off of her abusive relationship?”

By remembering that Leigh Bardugo actually championed the Darklina ship! That she actively supported it and its fans for years. That she baited a vast majority of this fandom into believing certain things were going to play out in her stories that never did.

By remembering that the Darkling is given his own backstory. That we see him as a child. That we have a chance to connect with his own traumas on an intimate level. 

By remembering that Leigh Bardugo made some missteps in how she framed the plight of the Grisha. By acknowledging that some people will see themselves in the Darkling, that they can’t not, that his character goes beyond Alina and his relationship with her. That thousands of fans look at this man fighting for the rights of his people, living with centuries of generational trauma, persecuted by outsiders and ostracized even within his own community, completely alone, and feel agony over the way he’s treated by the story. By acknowledging that the story Bardugo told was a damaging one to some who read it.

By remembering that the people in this fandom have lives and traumas of their own that they’re seeing in this book, in these characters, in this world, and they’re all taking away something different. By remembering that Leigh Bardugo is now not the only one involved in this story. That this goes beyond her. 

“how could you ship Darklina knowing she based it off of her abusive relationship?”

By realizing that many antis parrot buzzwords without any real idea what they actually mean as a means to scare off potential Darklina fans and actively shame the people who ship it, and that this rumor in particular got circulated by antis for much the same reasons.

Anti Darklinas grossly misuse terms like abuse, grooming, and pedophilia on a regular basis, and it’s actually kind of disconcerting. The way they overblow the negative aspects of the relationship and then twist or outright lie about canonical facts in the series is something people should be on more of a lookout for. Especially when it pertains to them creating content that could be damaging to a lot of people in the community and especially when they go out of their way to stalk and harass fans, purposefully triggering them.

Leigh Bardugo has recently misused the word grooming as well. It’s hurt a lot of fans and downplayed the reality of an actual, serious issue that many people face in real life. And because apparently none of these people are capable of research, the antis are now the parrots repeating what she’s said without any thought to the gravity of the situation.

So please, please, remember to fact check this stuff, and don’t believe every little thing the antis say. Not liking a ship is valid, respectful criticisms of a ship are valid, but the continued and exaggerated use of this rumor is just plain fucking offensive. Have some goddamn respect.

SO! How could I ship Darklina knowing it’s based it off of an abusive relationship? It’s easy. I just mind my own business and engage with the media/literature in a way that’s actually healthy. I don’t take the Word of God from an author who’s already finished the series. In fact I don’t take her word on much of anything, because why should I? I draw my own conclusions. I open myself up to new ideas. I remain confident in my ability to engage with the literature critically and comprehensively. I HAVE FUN.

[imnotwolverine]

Wolfie’s Fic Recs | The Grand Library of Kink 1/2

THE GRAND LIBRARY OF KINK - Allow me to give you a list of treats to quench the unbearable thirst between your thighs. 

>> Looking for part 2 of this list? <<

🖐WARNING: NSFW - SMUT below the cut 🖐

Author’s note: Let’s be honest. You probably are prowling the Tumblr grounds for the same reasons I am: there’s some darn good porn fics out here. And in the year I’ve been in the Cavillry, I’ve gathered a most wondrous collection of soft to extremely kinky fics. Time..to make a more comprehensible list of my favourites thusfar! (💦It’s long, so you better have some fresh panties at the ready💦)

In this library you’ll find:

Part 1:

Self-help 101  

Cherry Popping Goodness 

Vanilla With A Sprinkling Of Sex Toys 

Vanilla - Toybox Special 

Henry’s Hands Special

The Hook-up

Part 2:

Sensory Delights

The Triple Threat  

Fuck - The Geralt Special

Take It Like A Pussy - The Napoleon Special 

Hammer-time - The Walker Special 

Cpt. Cunnilingus - The Syverson Special

Thighs And Canes - The Sherlock Special 

Fem!DOM 

--

Self-help 101

[This one’s all about the act of self love - solo masturbation]

Toys are for boys. Unless it’s in the bedroom..right? Almost The Same by @lunedelorient  [Henry x Reader]

Mike can’t help himself as his gaze falls upon your lipstick stains on a beer bottle. Where else would he like those stains to be? Lipstick by @emyearns [Mike / reader]

A toy arrives to sweeten the lonely nights when Henry is away. There’s only one minor detail as the package is being unwrapped; she isn’t alone yet. Flying Solo by me [OFC x Henry Cavill]

I love fics written in Henry’s point of view. In this one Henry can’t take it no more. He simply needs to let off some steam; I Need A Woman by @chamomilebottom [Henry Cavill x reader]

This man gets caught..a lot, doesn’t he? You give Henry a helping hand as you catch him in the shower in Welcome Home by @rosethornsanddaisies [Henry Cavill x reader]

I wasn’t sure whether I should put this in the self-help section. So consider yourself warned: watch out..you’re in for a solo-lovin’ surprise in On Display by @ladyreapermc [August Walker x Reader]

--

Cherry Popping Goodness

[There’s a first time for each flower to bloom - loss of vaginal/anal virginity]

The bookstore meet-cute, the skipping heartbeats, and the fluster of cheeks as she just read a steamy passage of her book aloud. It’s the perfect recipe for romance...though there is one tiny, tiny... Her Minor Thing by @ladyreapermc [Henry Cavill x erotica novelist!OFC]

For one night only, gigolo August Walker will make all your fantasies come true. His specialty? Sweet, innocent little flowers. Velvet Chains by @littlefreya [August Walker x reader]

The morning after the cherry popping, a bud starts to bloom. White Honey by @littlefreya [Henry Cavill x reader]

This fic! This. Fic. I hadn’t seen I Capture The Castle when I read this fic, but it made me fall for Stephen so freakin’ hard that I kind of watched the movie straight after. It’s sweet, blushing-cheeks worthy and utterly cinematic. Bluebells by @yespolkadotkitty [Stephen x reader]

August Walker, a virgin? Well..there’s a First Time For Everything by @hope-to-hell [August Walker x reader]

Theseus didn’t mean it to go this way. But he was so thirsty - and now for more then just a drink of water. To Die of Thirst by @hope-to-hell. [Theseus x reader]

It’s Geralt’s first time and isn’t a Witcher body just a fascinating thing..hmm... Anatomy Lessons by @princess-of-riviaa [Geralt x experienced!reader] 

I didn’t know bullet point lists could be this sensual and H.O.T. - First Time w/ Henry by @henchry [Henry Cavill x reader]

GOODNESS ME. Can first times be like this for everyone, please and thank you?! My Flower gives you squirt-inducing, sweet talkin’ Henry making the most out of this special little moment. By @viking-raider [Henry Cavill x reader]

Wait till marriage with August? Highly unlikely....right? Uncharted Territory by @chamomilebottom [August Walker x reader]

Now onto some other sanctuaries to plunder. (Anal that is) Poker Night @foodieforthoughts [Syverson x OFC]

Lets @littlefreya’s words entice you into a new world as you and Henry finally pick the Forbidden Fruit (yep, anal again) [Henry Cavill x OFC]

And now we’re on the anal train, I do notice that men barely ever get any backdoor lovin’ from their partners. And I know, I know: most men are really apprehensive about it. But goodness can it be good! Sy has learned of it’s sweetness and reminisces that first time in Sy And The Sex Tape by @hope-to-hell [Syverson x reader]

--

Vanilla With A Sprinkling Of Sex Toys

[Couple’s sex with just a touch of kink] 

Let’s start with a game. Written in the language of love (French that is), this enticing bit of foreplay gets the blood streaming alright. Invisible Touch by @emelinelovesjc [Henry Cavill x reader]

Is it time for my favourite poetic foreplay fic?! YES it IS! Ode by @wolvesandhoundshowltogether just does something for me and I can simply not explain - just go ahead and read it and see for yourself! [Henry Cavill x reader] 

The key to good sex, is foreplay. And teasing during an event? You bet your  sweet ass you can get Henry riled up. Tease by @captainbigdy [Henry Cavill x reader]

Ready for some myrrh mountain-esque, super indulgent eroticism? Read Confessions by @captainbigdy [Henry Cavill x reader]

Birthday sex

What do you give a man who has it all, for his birthday? A little boudoir, a little make-out on the couch and...Happy Birthday by @rosethornsanddaisies [Henry Cavill x reader]

Apparently boudoir pictures for Henry’s birthday is on y’alls mind! A Picture’s Worth by @sunflowersstan gives you a belated birthday present - but that definitely should not spoil the fun. [Henry Cavill x reader]

Home (coming)

For once, Henry is forgiven for his ungodly early alarm clock: it’s beach time! And Kal will be there too. Home by @chamomilebottom [Henry Cavill x reader]

Henry, unfortunately, isn’t always home. In fact, he’s away quite a lot. Meaning it’s all the important to make up for lost time: Welcome Home by @geralt-of-baevia [Henry Cavill x reader]

And what’d you do if he finally comes home, but an impromptu surprise party is organised by his friends? Better Keep Quiet, baby. By @toomanystoriessolittletime [Henry Cavill x reader]

Does that come with side effects? When a 200 pound beast tackles you after coming home, you just might feel it in the next few days. Lust Worthy by @viking-raider [Henry Cavill x reader]

Home is also domestic goodness ( “Can I, baby?” He whispers against your cheek, placing a soft kiss to it, his eyes searching to meet yours. >> I mean..YES YOU CAN!! DO WHATEVER YOU MUST YOU HUNK OF A BEAR 😩) in this sweet ficseries chap by @lovelycavills: The Night [Henry Cavill x reader]

Tropes to lovers 

Friends to lovers trope, anyone? Of Fck It by @tillthelandslide gives you beers on the couch, friendly banter and then WOOPSIEDOODLIEDOO. [Henry Cavill x reader]

More friends to lovers with one accidental wet dream while lounging on the couch with Henry. Dreaming by @yoursecretsmutblog [Henry Cavill x reader]

Or perhaps PA/boss to lovers? Thunder by @toomanystoriessolittletime gives you Henry in full Geralt gear and rain..lots and lots of rain - meaning it’s time for a ..😏break. [Henry Cavill x OFC]

One more PA story to get the storm in your pussy settled. Years after working for Henry, you send a drunk text and he Answers. In the flesh. By @toomanystoriessolittletime [Henry Cavill x reader]

Audio porn

Another thing I got quite attached to while I learned all about my kinks here on Tumblr, is audio porn. And what better than to have Henry do some audio recording for us thirsty women? Erotic Audios Present... By @thetaoofzoe [Henry Cavill x OFC]

More audioporn!Henry? @toomanystoriessolittletime has got you covered with Talk Dirty To Me, starring photographer Henry who has had.. a bit of a past - and doesn’t his voice sound terribly familiar? 🧐[au!Henry Cavill x reader]

Communication

Smutty fics practically always skip the “So what do you actually like”-part. Well. This fic covers it - and then some. The Interview by @peachyvulpixie. [Henry Cavill x OFC]

And communication is very - very important. Especially when moving stuff around, right Henry? A Little Bit To The Left by @lunedelorient [Henry Cavill x OFC] 

Communication is also key when you want to decide on sub/dom dynamics. Switch has daddy vibes, but in a domestic, confidential, well-established relationship. By @viking-raider [Henry Cavill x reader] 

Or, you may just want to tell sweet Henry that it’s definitely okay to get a little louder between the sheets. Express Yourself by @viking-raider [Henry Cavill x reader]

A thrilling ride

Want to “chose your own adventure” in smutty style? @sciapod’s got just the thing you’re looking for with BD Morning Energy  [Henry Cavill x reader]

Sometimes it’s rough, sometimes it’s sweet, but ever and ever; it’s truly Henry. Read about various types of horny Henry in Shapeshifter by @wanderinglunarnights [Henry Cavill x reader]

Body/orgasm insecurity

This was a very personal piece to write. I have difficulty reaching orgasms, especially with a partner, so for all fellow ladies with the same little problem: Henry is here to give you some Riding Lessons between the sheets. [Henry Cavill x OFC]

And I’m so, so glad that there’s at least a few of you here on Tumblr who can also get a little worried and even impatient between the sheets. Thankfully Henry is the posterboy of Patience, ready to unravel you piece...by.. delicious..piece. By @captainbigdy [Henry Cavill x OFC] 

Nipple love

Female nips get all the lovin’. But male nipples? Not often. Tease by @the-soot-sprite will make sure that is taken well taken care off. [Henry Cavill x reader]

Alright, and now for a little female nip-nip action, let’s dive right into the action. Rough lovin’, shovin’ Cavill is showing you how terribly fucked out he can get you in In My Thoughts by @jolly-polly [Henry Cavill x reader]

Horizontal vs. vertical sex 

Shower sex is such a delectable topic to read about (even though in real life it’s usually awkward and impractical). Let your dreams bring you..after workout Showers with Henry by @darklydeliciousdesires [Henry Cavill x reader]

Or perhaps honeymoon shower sessions? Mirror by @tillthelandslide [Henry Cavill x OFC]

Did someone say honeymoon? Marshall remembers having to climb through that darn window the night before he married you and it makes for a super sweet, domestic fluffy smutty sex scene. And did I mention there was family right at the other side of the door? 👀 Locked by @fourmarkdove [Marshall x reader]

After all that working out it’s time for some food. But what would Henry prefer: ragu or you? What’s Cooking by @writingforhenry [Henry Cavill x reader]

Netflix and Chill

Netflix and chill, anyone? This Movie Night becomes a little steamy 💦 by @writingforhenry [Henry Cavill x reader]

It’s really difficult to watch tv with Henry around, and Freya gets a little frustrated with his incessant teasing; can a woman not just watch some Mindhunter in peace, damnit?! The Refund by @wolvesandhoundshowltogether [Henry Cavill x OFC]

Play-time! 

From game play to girlfriend play during an extremely boring day in lockdown. Confined by @darklydeliciousdesires [Henry Cavill x reader]

More game chair smuttiness? It’s Game on! Mic on! - And ..Eh.. wait..what?! By @thecavillchronicles [Henry Cavill x reader]

Is tickle-play a thing? After a long day where everything seems to have gone wrong, you just need a good shag and Mike will make sure you can Sleep soundly tonight. @emyearns [Mikey x reader]

Alright, it’s a thing. Here’s some more tickle play with Marshall. Laughing During Sex by @promptandpros [Marshall x reader]

Hereby I declare that hairplay is also a thing. And with curls like Henry’s..I mean..come on. Love So Soft gives you dry-humping like horny teenagers after a bad day - and yes..hairplay. By @princess-of-riviaa [Henry Cavill x reader]

Needy Henry

Sad sky eyes are in dire need of some medicine, but Rose doesn’t realise until she’s getting some action for herself that the best medicine for Henry’s malady, is probably not watery soup. In Morbus Et Salus by @fanficsrusz [Henry Cavill x OFC]

Drunk Henry is in need of a midnight snack. And it’s a good thing there just happens to be one in his bed. Drunk In Love by @angrythingstarlight [Henry Cavill x reader]

And the next morning he might just be a really, really needy bear. (My boyfriend, for one, is always EXTRA horny when he is hungover 😂) Five More Minutes by @angrythingstarlight [Henry Cavill x reader]

A few more

And five minutes is probably all you get when you have kids. But it just makes these little mommy and daddy moments all the more sacred. Close To You by @the-soot-sprite [Henry Cavill x reader]

There’s also not a lot of time when you’re in a limo, trying to get your groove on. 🎶Driver roll up the Partition pleaseee 🎶by @fanficsrusz [Henry Cavill x reader]

Now to finish off this vanilla segment: vanilla kisses! Lick Me Till Icecream by @the-soot-sprite [Henry Cavill x reader]

--

Vanilla - Toybox Special 

[A special toy segment for you vanilla(ish) lovers] 

When it’s play time - long work day or no - Henry better be prepared for some frisky business. On Purpose by @wanna-do-bad-things (also hell yes for including some toys!) [Henry Cavill x one very frustrated OFC]

More toys? MORE TOYS! Command And Obey brings you dom!Henry being a terrible teasing ass, but alas..it still gets you all kinds of wet *shrugs* By @wanna-do-bad-things [Henry Cavill x reader]

Perhaps need some dom!Clark instead? With toys? We’ve got you covered. By @poledancingdinos [Clark x OFC]

Now, let’s not forget about Henry’s favourite toy of them all. His bike. In Good Vibrations by @deathonyourtongue [Henry Cavill x reader]

You find Henry pleasing himself with something you didn’t even know he owned; a fleshlight. Henry’s Toy by @viking-raider [Henry Cavill x reader]

--

Henry’s Hands Special 

[I can’t be the only one who has the hots for hands]

Having a bad day? Talented fingers belonging to one caring man of a Henry are here to let off your steam. Burn The Couch by @meowpurrbooks [Henry Cavill x reader]

I’m glad I’m not the only one who has a complete and utter obsession with male hands. This fic is amazing in every way. It’s got suspense, hands AND Henry; Idle Hands by @thelastsock [Henry Cavill x Reader]

More handsy stuff is offered in this private drawing session. Draw Me With Your Fingers by @emelinelovesjc [Henry Cavill x OFC!author]

This fic? ..it’s hands-on work. I must give a disclaimer: I’m hard to please when it comes to daddy!fics, but this one I truly enjoyed. It perfectly rides (hehe) the fine balance between rough throat fucking, choking and usage of the endearing nickname ‘little fawn’. Hands by @twhstuckylover [Henry Cavill x reader]

Henry’s hands are here to warm you up on a cold day in Finger Work by @yoursecretsmutblog [Henry Cavill x reader]

--

The Hook-up

[A little less established, a little more messy. But definitely h-o-t-h-o-t-h-o-t]

Changing rooms may just hide a Dirty Secret (and crotchless pantyhoses) by @foodieforthoughts [Henry Cavill x OFC]

Being toyed around, Henry can’t stand it any longer - and goodness where did he leave that darn bowtie?! Caught In The Storm by @thelastsock [Henry Cavill x Reader]

Syverson is also not one who likes to be toyed around with, especially when you’re in the same bar wearing that deliciously short dress and his favourite high heels. Mine by @yoursecretsmutblog [Syverson x reader]

Dancefloor delights and popping buttons (is this a good time to admit I have ripped some shirts like that? *woops* 😅) - this quite exhibitionistic fic is an utter delight and I’m Glad You Came  by @foodieforthoughts [Henry Cavill x reader]

Since this is steady-hook-up I wasn’t sure whether to post it in this segment or the Vanilla segment, but ..yea..it definitely deserves a read! Rules Of Engagement has Em and Henry coming to the realisation that a friendly hook-up isn’t all that easy. Especially not when one foul IUD throws baby dust in their busy lives. By @ladyreapermc​ [Henry Cavill x OFC] 

Marshall specials 

An old friend/lover shows up just when you find yourself with the predicament of a broken down car. Before you know it you’re having car sex with one curly haired police officer in..yea..a police car. A Perfect Shitty Day by @toomanystoriessolittletime [Marshall x reader]

OOPH you girls are in it for the Walter hook-ups. Forget That Asshole follows up after you had one particularly disappointing blind date. And thankfully a blue eyed sweater-bear-man is there to provide you some much needed consolation.  By @penwieldingdreamer [Marshall x reader]

Sex on set

On set things might just get a little steamy, so might as well take ..*clip scene* ACTION! Touch Me Tease Me by @deathonyourtongue [Henry Cavill x OFC]  

More on-set delights? Perhaps with a touch of embarrassing nerves? Directed By La Petite Mort by @wolvesandhoundshowltogether [Henry Cavill x reader]

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>> Looking for part 2 of this list? <<

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Artworks/edits are mine ❤️And as always: if you have more fic recs to add, share them in your reblogs/comments! 

--

[shunkani]

Chapter 132 Levi/Hange Analysis

Summary: An attempt to explain the sentence in chapter 132

Levi: I see your one sided love with Titans still goes unrequited, four-eyes.

Hange: ...We’ll be getting along soon enough.　（…すぐに仲良くなるさ）

Disclaimer: this is just interpretation and not meant to be taken as official proof of romance between Levi and Hange in Attack on Titan. This is theory and nothing else. I’ve read multiple tweets and essays to compile my own thoughts.

I personally do not have any qualms with other ships, and this essay doesn’t discredit other Hange or Levi CP’s. Also, sorry but this essay has no pictures. 

Lesson_____

A quick Japanese lesson (and language comprehension); I will try to make it painless. I make no assumption on the reader’s Japanese level/English grammar understanding and will be talking about it as is.

When は is combined with another particle, it puts emphasis in a way such as English has intonation. Since Japanese does not stress tone (like how one says the words sarcastically/meaningfully/sadly/cheekily) it uses particles to do this job.

So, when Levi says, “��変わらず巨人とは片思いのままだったなクソメガネ“

It means literally, “As always, still an unrequited love with Titans, four-eyes.”

Naturally, “Your love for Titans is one-sided, as usual, four-eyes.”

In Japanese, using には or とは creates a third, invisible option that is outside of the realm of the sentence.

When you use に or と or even は by itself, it creates a one dimensional statement. When used with other particles combined with は it creates another, outside dimension to the sentence. A third suggestion or comparison. は can be used as a comparative or stress particle as well as a topic marker.

quick example.

I didn’t go to the library with him. ->彼と図書館に行かなかった.（ Forward statement. It is as it is. ）

I didn’t go to the library with him. ->彼とは図書館に行かなかった （Implying I went there with someone else, but not him. ）

Just like you’d expect, English speakers understand the implications of stressing “him.” Just as Japanese speakers understand the implications of とは etc. If we stressed library(図書館には）instead of “boy” (彼とは）then it’s implication is that we didn’t go to the library with him, but maybe somewhere else. I hope this is clear. 

____

Okay, on with the analyses. Just a note again, but I’ve naturalized any Japanese so that it’s not literal, but the meaning is the same so it’s easier to comprehend for native English speakers. I’ve changed “I” to “we” considering I formatted to fit essays.

From  ストリキーネさん’s essay

Like others have said, Levi’s words feel like his true confession. Whether it’s romantic or not, it’s up in the air, but while making small talk and commenting about his long time comrade in arms, it seems like this comment is loaded with unlabeled feelings, like “You gross me out, but I feel something special for you and I get you.”

It feels natural to say “You still have unrequited love for Titans.” right after the banter of Hange and Pieck’s exchange.  {note: 巨人に片思いのままだな is using に here, not とは, so it feels natural to say に）

So why did he use “とは” and not ”に”？

If there’s official announcement that say’s there’s no meaning to it, or that it’ll be corrected in the official volume, then this sentence will be meaningless. But if it’s intentional or even unconscious decision, we get the impression that he is recalling a third person (”me” ie Levi) among Hange and the Titans. 

 Moreover, hearing “four eyes” was unexpected and we can only imagine it was surprising for Hange too. Since we might have never expected that we’d hear “four eyes” in the original manga again, it’s perplexing, but feels filled with something like nostalgia. 

With Hange taking over as commander and the world rapidly changing, we get the feeling that there’s a distance between them, at least from what is shown to us from the story. 

Because of this short exchange about Titans, all at once we are brought back to “An eccentric, Titan-loving section commander,” and “Captain who’s fond of four-eyes,” and it’s moving. 

There’s a little pause (note: talking about the “...” before Hange starts talking) at the end of Levi’s lines and the start of Hange’s dialogue. One wonders if it couldn’t be a mix between surprise and relief on Hange’s end. 

Also, as many others have said, Levi is answering Hange’s “I’d prefer if we live here together,” from the forest, to the best that he can. There was no reason to look back at that scene in relation to this because Levi seemed to have brushed off Hange’s shocking statement, but since everyone was referencing that scene, a second re-examination was in order. (Note, the author actually said something a little more personal, so I condensed it to match a more essay-like statement)

Levi could have been surprised.

Someone who he’s known for a long time, and supported each other, and can admit that (Hange) can be troublesome sometimes, but also they hit it off well, yet each of their own responsibilities have become heavier and the world is in this state... in a situation like this, when suddenly alone together in a quiet forest, he might think Hange has stopped thinking if seriously suggesting to run away and saying things like “let’s live together.”

Under circumstances like this, if it were us, we’d likely want to do it, but remember we have responsibilities, maybe we don’t know what the other person feels, perhaps we’d rather we never heard it, so we pretend not to. In Levi’s case, perhaps pretend to sleep (pretending to not be able to hear it) or when he wakes up, change the subject completely.  

It’s unlikely that Levi could give an answer on the spot, and would want time to figure it out. 

(There’s more to the essay but it’s thoughts on relationships between people and some other things that don’t apply to the quote)

ーーーーー

Notes concluded from various twitter surfing:

Many JP fans think Levi’s statement alluded to the forest scene. It’s like his clumsy answer to Hange’s proposal, since he didn’t give a direct answer. Actually the essay above felt his answer was cold and ignored Hange. But Hange doesn’t seem displeased about it. 

As many have said, Hange and Levi are definitely “adults” in this world. They both understand it’s not feasible to do the things they want to do, because their duties supersede that. Hange carries the immense duty of commander, and both hold the responsibility to stop Eren or fight for humanity as a whole. 

It’s rather evident to me, even as an ordinary reader, that Levi did not want Hange to go. In fact, Hange says, 行かせて, “let me go.” and anticipated Levi would try to stop Hange. Mind you, it’s not “release me” but “I have to do this, so don’t stop me.” It took him three panels, focused on his dead-like eyes to finally say “Dedicate your heart,” something he’s apparently never said before. To me, “Dedicate your heart” is a self-sacrificing quote when applied to the Survey Corps. Pretty much “go in bravely, and don’t expect to come back.” Levi is a “Live and come back’ type. The strange thing is that Levi puts his hand on Hange and says it.. in Hange’s place..? It’s a salute before battle, but here it feels like a gentle sentence. Why it was delivered that way? I hope that Isayama will answer these questions in future interviews. 

＿＿＿＿＿＿＿＿＿

Another thing, Levi says みててくれ to Hange, a now deceased person. Levi has never asked anything from the dead. He’s mentioned fulfilling his promise to Erwin about killing Zeke, but some have found it strange for Levi to ask Hange to “Watch me (kill Zeke.”) (edit: the point is that Levi asked Hange to keep watching him, so it seems that his promises and goals may have changed)

One user said something pretty sad. “For Levi, I think Hange is treated as a MIA. Even if there’s no chance of survival, if Levi looks at Hange’s death, Hange has ended for him right there. So since Hange hasn’t ended, he said “ watch out for me.” That’s the reason why Levi, who’s looked at dead soldiers in the eye, didn’t look at Hange.”

It’s simply, Levi didn’t say “Rest in peace,” or “Goodnight.” but “See ya, Hange. Keep looking out for me.” 

＿＿＿＿＿＿＿＿

Going back to the quote about Titans, the summary is, that in Japanese, Levi’s speech seems incredibly nuanced because he uses language that suggests that Hange and him have come to a mutual feeling, and it’s simply by stating “with Titans” (but there’s a mutual love with me). That’s why the above essay questions if this isn’t a misprint or mistake, or perhaps it’s nothing at all. (I want to point out, that one user suggested it could refer to Eren, but it seems unlikely) 

This is his “answer.” And Hange says...”...We’ll get along soon enough.” 

There’s a “...” before Hange says that, indicating a pause, whether out of surprise by being called “four-eyes”, or carefully thinking on how to respond to “とは” 

Some other notes before I close this up, I thought this was a nice thought on LeviHan:

Hange was introduced while talking and having contact with Levi and Hange exited while talking and having contact with Levi. Really, Hange’s story started and ended with Levi. 

＿＿＿＿＿＿＿＿

I apologize if this seems everywhere, I’m not particularly fond of writing, but for Hange’s last chapter, I feel like English speakers should get in on what Japanese levihan fans were saying. 

終わり

[mosaic-system]

Hi! Sorry if you have already been asked this, but: my friend (not on Tumblr) has found out that one of her friends apparently has DID. She's looking for quality media about DID (movies, documentaries, books, anything) approved by DID people, which portray it realistically, without the usual stigmatizing undertones. She wants to learn and understand it as much as possible. Do you have any recommendations? Thank you and best wishes!

Okay this one is tough not gonna lie, books are the easiest for me though so I’ll go first:

Books

- Coping with Trauma-based dissociation more so for the system than the friendly member but definitely a good read

- Dissociative Identity Disorder Sourcebook probably the most comprehensive, this goes into detail about why it forms and what it looks like, good for the purely mental side

- Loving Someone With DID: Navigating your relationship with someone who has Dissociative Identity Disorder getting it to read right now so I will let you know how it is, read other books by the same author that are pretty good

⚠️tw religion, skip this one if needed⚠️

- Dissociative Identity Disorder - The Basics About Multiple Personalities from a Christian Perspective this was the host’s favorite because she had a hard time rationalizing it with her beliefs, so I’ll leave it here just in case

Movies

None really that I’ve seen, most are too draumatized to be an accurate source of information

Videos

- What It’s Like to Live with Dissociative Identity Disorder (DID) Interview with a system, good to hear about if you do not experience firsthand

- Multiplicity and Me honestly most of their content is great, very informational from a system studying in the field of psychology

There was another website I wanted to link but I cannot seem to find it now...will see about adding it later, but I hope this was helpful!

-Jay/Host

[marginalgloss]

A little while ago I wrote about Swimming to Cambodia, a copy of which I discovered in a charity shop. I read it and I liked it a lot. And then for a while I forgot about Spalding Gray until one day my wife pointed him out to me in the film Beaches. I think he played a doctor of some kind — I wasn’t really paying attention — but it was enough to get me thinking about his stuff again.

I started trawling YouTube for what I could find. Most of his stuff is out of print, but there at least you can find a few of the monologues — Terrors of Pleasure, Gray’s Anatomy and It’s a Slippery Slope are all delightful. The most interesting primer is Steven Soderbergh’s documentary And Everything is Going Fine, which is assembled entirely from excerpts from Gray’s monologues and interviews. It’s a deft, skilful, and beautifully elegiac piece of work which feels more like one great final performance than it does a conventional biography. Appropriate, perhaps, given that so much of what Gray did was rendering up his life through storytelling. 

I also bought a couple of books: Impossible Vacation, which is the only novel Gray published, and the posthumous collection of extracts from his journals. Apparently he laboured for years over the text of Impossible Vacation, with the original draft running to over a thousand pages — the monologue Monster in a Box was actually performed with the manuscript sitting in a scruffy cardboard box at his elbow. The final published form of Impossible Vacation is a relatively svelte few hundred pages in paperback, which is enough to make anyone wonder about the scale of the original. 

I was expecting Impossible Vacation to be a bit more novel-like. I was expecting a modern American comic story along the lines of A Confederacy of Dunces, perhaps. But in fact, the novel is a lightly fictionalised version of Gray’s own life. And that’s about as ‘light’ as it gets: it’s funny, but it’s also just as self-involved as any of his monologues. Gray’s protagonist is renamed Brewster North, but not much detective work is required to map North to the author. Much of the novel is mirrored elsewhere in Gray’s stories from the stage: the trip to India, his brief stint as an actor in pornographic movies, the experimental theatre scene in New York; and above all the memory of his mother, and the lasting effects of her suicide. 

If you read (and watch) far enough into Gray’s work it feels a little like wandering into a hall of mirrors: we see the same selves and preoccupations reflected over and over again, sometimes in distorted or disturbing ways. Glimpsed in passing the effect is comic, but after a while the effect becomes haunting. There is a moment in Gray’s Anatomy where he describes watching a student in a storytelling workshop, and staring into her eyes, and watching her face somehow disintegrate until the flesh falls from her skull and her face becomes a sort of ball of white light. Sometimes that’s what reading his stories feels like: the contortions of history and storytelling are subject to a relentless focus that becomes so intense that the reader is lulled into a sort of hypnotic compliance. 

This feeling of falling into a sort of dissociative trance is not uncommon in his work; it seems emblematic of a sort of transcendental feeling that Gray was perpetually striving for. Hence the dream of the ‘perfect moment’ in Swimming to Cambodia, hence escapism via skiing in It’s a Slippery Slope. Set against that dream of escape is everything the real world has to offer: the anguish of the domestic; the problems caused by anxiety, depression, drinking; the sad, strange, tortuous complications of his love life. In these respects, it hasn’t aged well – I can imagine audiences today having a little less patience for Gray’s occasional sways into mysticism. And his attitude towards women might at times be generously described as ‘problematic’. In the 90s perhaps it was easier to dismiss his casual reports of philandering as the trappings of the tortured artist; today it only seems sad, and a little wearying.

So why is it that I find his stuff so appealing? I’m not in the habit of reading biography. I like podcasts, but while Gray seems like a model for all kinds of modern tendencies in vlogging, I’m not aware of anyone who is doing exactly what he did in the same way he did it. Current trends towards the confessional in stand-up comedy don’t quite fit, either. The form of the thing is so important. He was as much a performer as he was a storyteller. The closest equivalent that I know of is David Sedaris, and I find his stuff intolerable. There are a few reasons for this, but to me Sedaris always seems convinced that the problem is with other people. He is stuck in a mode of perpetual disdain. But with Gray, we are never really left in any doubt that this author is in fact the only author of his own troubles. And yet he also knows how to have fun, sometimes; and I find that endearing because it seems to me more honest, and less spiteful.

One point of comparison is Proust. I don’t mean to say Gray’s prose is exactly Proustian, but they have an endearing amount in common. There’s a perpetual anxiety about death and entropy that often manifests itself as hypochondria. There’s the obsession with the mother, the retiring nature, the preoccupation with irony. The pursuit of the perfect moment through which emotion can become recollected in tranquility. And though both took to entirely different forms of media, it seems like both were attempting something a level of formal innovation which, while initially seeming familiar, approached a new way of committing memory and experience into art.   

Impossible Vacation is often intense but it’s not always laugh-out-loud funny. More often it seems possessed by a restless, struggling, enquiring energy. Sometimes the writing is inspired, but it lacks form – the feeling of form that was so dominant in the monologues themselves. As it stands, you wouldn’t consider half of the things that go on in the book as the plot for a novel because (like life) they don’t entirely cohere. And the story ends before it ever really begins, though it does at least contrive a neat circular ending that recalls (lightly) Finnegans Wake. 

Still, it’s a shame that the novel is out of print because, much like his monologues, it’s certainly worthwhile; the published journals of Spalding Gray are an entirely different and more difficult thing. The journals are kind of a mess. An enormous amount of biographical heavy lifting is provided by the notes and annotations by the editor, Nell Casey, and without this context any reader would struggle to discern what was going on. But the notes are pretty comprehensive, and in the end this seems as close to a biography as we are ever likely to get. It does, however, take a long time to get going. The journal entries all through the 70s and early 80s are sketchy, and not especially interesting. A lot of the time they’re purely expressive, and we have to be told what it is exactly that they are referring to. It’s only once the monologues get going that his private style becomes elaborate and involved enough to be worth reading.  

The picture we get of Gray is less of a single-minded auteur and more of a man who sort of wandered-or-fell into fame as a monologuist. After the fame and exposure of Swimming to Cambodia there is a sense of freewheeling — of doing what he’s doing because it’s what he does, and it’s rarely entirely under his own steam. He is perpetually worried, questioning, uncomfortable. Eventually he would become concerned with the idea that he had used himself up, and that he had no private life worth living outside the performances. But some of this was ameliorated by the late in life arrival of children and a more settled family situation. For a while, he thought himself happier than he had ever been.

In 2001, Gray was involved in a terrible car crash while on holiday in Ireland. His injuries included a broken hip and a fractured skull that likely caused brain damage. The accident changed his life, and afterwards he was never the same. The journal entries from after this point are harrowing — there is no other word for it. I knew of his eventual suicide, but I had no idea until of the extent to which depression utterly consumed his life. I didn’t know about the frequent hospitalisations, the shock treatment, and the pain his failed suicide attempts caused on others. There aren’t many extracts from this time shown, but what we are given was enough at times to make me wonder if any of it should have been published at all. But perhaps there is a purpose in trying to give a picture of the anguish he was in. 

All through his life Gray had been preoccupied with the idea of his mother taking her own life. The story he told about this was that this was precipitated by his parents moving house, to a new place away from the ocean, which his mother could never feel at home in. After the accident he and his family also moved house, and he came to regret this decision intensely. The editor Nell Casey calls this ‘his obsession, a mythic rant’. Gray cannot seem to accept the idea that a house might be, as a psychologist puts it, ‘a pile of sticks’. Here is how Gray considers trying to explain it to his sons:

‘…And they said, I’m sure, that, you know, Mrs. Gray—my mom—has other problems about the house, it must be symbolic of something, that same old Freudian rap, you know, sometimes a cigar is just a cigar, sometimes a house is just a house. She missed the house. It wasn’t symbolic of something, she really missed walking along the sea. I miss walking in the village, I miss the cemetery, I miss hundreds of things. But boys, listen: when you get to that point, where you have been driven so crazy by something, like for me, when I think about the house, it’s not me thinking about it, it’s thinking me…’

[nyarnamaitar]

About that NYT article...

Emilia’s latest NYT article has pissed me off for a number of reasons, but I really don’t think it means that we should be anxious about Dany’s S8 arc. Or, in other words: dark!Dany won’t be a thing, FFS. I love the Dany/Jonerys fandom, but some of you really need to stop letting Dany antis’/J*nsa shippers’ rhetoric get to you.

I’ll try to break down my reasoning:

1. Apparently, Maureen Dowd, the author of the article, is quite infamous for her stance on real-life women. She poses as a feminist, yet she made quite the career out of bashing, amongst others, Hillary Clinton. This doesn’t mean that she hates Daenerys, but every piece of writing -- and certainly an opinion piece, which is what the NYT article is -- directly or indirectly reflects the author’s views and well, let’s just say that I’m... Wary of Dowd. I’ve seen Dany fans complain that this press tour has been overwhelmingly negative for Dany and while I agree that the Northern lords and their stans are wankers with shriveled up penises who need to get their priorities straight, I wouldn’t say S8′s promo has been that bad for Dany fans at all. Dany heavily figures in S8′s advertising, photoshoots, and trailers and most of this material consists out Dany and Jon as a couple.

2. The NYT article content that pisses me off the most are the comments on House Targaryen and how the Targaryens are equated with madness, which implies that Dany’s questionable leadership choices are a consequence of her parentage, which is... Problematic to say the least. One does not have to be mentally ill or have a mentally ill father to make bad choices. As not to stray off-topic too much, I’m just going to say that I really dislike the way this fandom talks about mental illness or how mental illness is capitalised upon to discredit a character one doesn’t like. However, going back to the NYT article, these anti Targaryen comments are almost exclusively the author’s and based on Dowd’s track record, I’m inclined to dismiss them. Having read Fire and Blood, ASoIaF fans -- or at least those with basic reader comprehension skills -- know that most of the Targaryens weren’t mad and that a lot of Targaryen kings have done good things for Westeros. 

3. As for Emilia’s comments, there are a number of things I want to address. 

(A) First of all, it seems like the Tarlys’ execution will be a big deal in S8 (*sigh*), which is why I think that when Emilia talks about Dany’s ‘Targaryen impulses’ (my words), she’s mostly talking about the loot train battle and the subsequent burning of the Tarlys. Although (and strangely enough) Dave Hill has come out and stated that Dany made the right call in executing Randyll and Dickon, the show is obviously using this scene to manufacture drama by teasing mad queen!Dany. I really wish this weren’t the case, but alas, it is. That being said, I still agree with Dave Hill. In-universe, the Tarlys’ execution wasn’t exceptional at all and it pisses me off that Dany gets shit for doing something lots of other characters have done, too. 

(B) I don’t think Emilia’s comments are entirely off the bat. Dany does have darker impulses and in the books, Dany herself is very much aware of them. She continuously questions her own judgement and sanity, which convinces me that she won’t ever become truly mad. Fuck that noise. 

(C) I find it... Unfortunate that Emilia’s buying into the House Targaryen = madness crap, but we should keep in mind that we don’t know the context of the interview, the amount of time Emilia received to adequately answer Dowd’s questions, etc. Plus, I’m quite fond of Emilia and I don’t want to bash her at all, BUT a lot of the GoT actors don’t have a particularly good grasp on their characters. Maisie’s interpretation of Arya is atrocious. Sophie’s comments on Sansa’s character arc are laughably bad (The warrior of Winterfell? Really?). And while Emilia loves Dany, she’s not an exception. She doesn’t know the lore as well as we, the fans, do. It’s sad, but it’s true.

So, in short: I don’t think the NYT article “proves” that dark!Dany/mad queen!Dany will be a thing in S8. I think it attemps to emphasise that Dany has darker impulses and that she’s made mistakes that will haunt her in S8, i.e. the execution of the Tarlys and its effect on Sam. I agree with the article in the sense that, yes, Dany is flawed — just like pretty much all of the ASoIaF/GoT characters are. However, I vehemently disagree with how the execution of the Tarlys is treated by both D&D and the anti Dany section of the GoT fandom.

Based on everything we've received so far, including BoatSexBaby’s and Friki’s spoilers, nothing indicates that Dany will become dark/darker in S8. The NYT article just serves to foment the GoT hype AND highlight the darker aspects of Dany’s character that the audience should already be familiar with. It doesn’t tell us anything particularly new about Dany’s arc and character in S8.

Plus, I don’t think we pay enough attention to the good things the NYT article has to say about Dany. It recognises the double standard female rulers have to face in Westeros; it praises Dany’s character arc and iconic status in the show; it ends on the note that if Donald Trump lived in Westeros, Dany would be the one to overthrow him, etc. These arguments are hardly negative and don’t point to dark!Dany/mad queen!Dany at all. 

So, while some parts of the NYT article are dumb (and even upsetting), I don’t think we should be very alarmed by them. My opinions on Dany’s character and storyline in S8 haven’t changed since the article’s publication and I truly believe we should all calm down a bit.

[ongshat]

  For a comprehensive list of most of my print work (not including magazine articles) see this list on Goodreads.

All my works dedicated to the memory of my dearly departed friends: The members of The Formless Ocean Group – Nina Graboi, Elizabeth Gips, Paddy Long, Betsy Herbert, and Robert Anton Wilson. Also to my departed friends: Dave, DW Cooper, Dr. Hyatt (Alan) and humdog.

PAST WORK

Beats In Time: A Literary Generation’s Legacy (Chapter 12 is my interview with Diane DiPrima) also to be included in Conversations with Diane di Prima to be published by the University Press of Mississippi, in 2021/22.

Transmedia: Who Invited the Lobsters Anyway?

Legend-Tripping Online: Supernatural Folklore and the Search for Ong’s Hat by Michael Kinsell – While clearly this is a book about my transmedia project it also includes a lot of things that I wrote as examples, so I include it here. Metamodernism, anyone?

Rebels and Devils: The Psychology of Liberation edited by Christopher S. Hyatt, Ph.D. introduced by S. Jason Black foreword by Nicholas Tharcher contributions by William S. Burroughs Joseph C. Lisiewski, Ph.D. Timothy Leary Ph.D., Robert Anton Wilson, Austin Osman Spare, Genesis P-Orridge, Aleister Crowley, Joseph Matheny, Peter J. Carroll, Israel Regardie, Jack Parsons, Phil Hine, Osho, and many others

Black Book Omega: CIRQUE APOKLYPSIS by Christopher S. Hyatt, Ph.D. Joseph Matheny, Nick Pell, Calvin Iwema, Wes Unruh, Antero Alli (more info here)

Contributor YouTube: An Insider’s Guide to Climbing the Charts (more info here)

Introduction to The Art of Memetics Aside: When I posted about this book on Greylodge, Seth Godin references the post as a good example of “How to write like a blogger“ This made me happy. 😉

Contributor/Editor:This is Not a Game: A Guide to Alternate Reality Gaming with Dave Szulborski (Excerpt here )I edited and contributed to : “This Is Not a Game” which was included in the annual Tween market report that went to marketing executives worldwide in the toy, gaming and youth market industries. Also, I appeared as myself/in character, in person,  in the “Catching the Wish” ARG by Dave.

Third Realm (The Yellow King) Written and executed by me, produced in conjunction with Foolish People http://www.argn.com/2009/10/puzzles_for_the_apocalyps

4P2 My first foray into the True Crime arena. Formula:  Just put up a single, spooky web page, that purports to be a recruitment drive for an organization whose actual existence is speculative at best and at worst is fiction presented as fact or paranoid, hysterical hand-waving in the interest of selling books and you will get all kinds of reactions. In all fairness, I think the theories mentioned read as good fantasy crime fiction and this was a conceptual attempt at that very thing. Apparently, it succeeded. The unnerving side of this was the equal amount of applications I received asking to join (Really? Join a group of underground serial killers? Really?) or outright death threats by people who really believe in such things.   (Someone summed it up pretty well in this article from The Fenris Wolf)

  the-fenriswolf-iss-no-4-pp-87-116 PDF Excerpt

El Centro & OMEGA This was a ARG/Transmedia style story with occult/horror/conspiracy elements, started in 2004 and ended in 2006. It utilized Web, print (booklet), radio, phone trees, theater and news wire services. [A version of the doughnut shop scene from this story was used in Amsterdam production of Terra: Extremitas by Foolish People.] This project was done in collaboration my late friend Dave Szulborski. There’s a LOOOOOONG story about this project. So long in fact that it will take up at least three chapters in an future book.

Contributor: What Would Bill Hicks Say with Ben Mack, Amelia the Great and Soft Skull Press (along with Jeff Danziger and Martyn Turner; writers Neal Pollack, Robert Newman, and A.L. Kennedy; and Thom Yorke of Radiohead and others…)

Contributor: 2004-2005 Exquisite Language project for the 2004 ELfest and collected in the Spring 2005 issue of of 2 Gyrlz Quarterly. NOW AVAILABLE AT POWELLS.COM

Introduction, afterward and editing for Poker Without Cards– First Edition. I orchestrated the first release campaign for this book, with the main character becoming “real”on the Internet for a while. After the first few months I turned it over to the author. (statement regarding this work here)

GALT’S ARK: The Black Symphony, First and Second Movements Produced by Cthulhu The Players: Joseph Matheny, Christopher S. Hyatt, Ph.D., Father Daniel Suders & Nicholas Tharcher Illustrated by S. Jason Black, Jonathan Sellers, Weirdpixie & MobiusFrame

  THE BLACK BOOK Volume III, Part I

THE BLACK BOOK Volume III, Part II

(The Black Books are considered the workbooks for The Psychopath’s Bible, which I wrote an infamous jacket blurb for.)

The Incunabula: Ong’s Hat Project [ Reviews | Interviews, etc. | Wikipedia | History] This was a ARG/Transmedia style story started in 1988 and ended in 2001. It utilized zines, BBS, early Internet, Web, CD ROM, CD Audio, DVD, print (book, graphic novel and magazine), radio, phone trees, fax, and news wire services. I gained and leveraged exposure in both the mainstream and alternative media to distribute over 2 million copies of CD ROM, ebook and print versions of the story combined. Story elements from Ong’s Hat were also included in the EA Game, Majestic which unfortunately ended prematurely due to 9/11. It was the subject of a full 4 hour show on Coast to Coast AM, been the subject of an article on the Weekly World News and been covered on many radio shows world wide, books, newspapers, magazines, etc. Links to media here.

Description: “…a bizarre Internet phenomenon: an “immersive” online experience—part mystery, part game, part who knows what—known as both the Incunabula Papers and Ong’s Hat. The Incunabula Papers/Ong’s Hat was, or is, a “many-threaded, open-ended interactive narrative” that ”weds an alternate history of chaos science and consciousness studies to conspiracy theories, parallel dimensions, and claims that computer-mediated environments can serve as magical tools…. the documents provoked a widespread “immersive legend-trip” in the late 1990s. Via Web forums, participants investigated the documents—manifestos—which spun up descriptions of brilliant but suppressed discoveries relating to paths that certain scientists had forged into alternate realities. Soon, those haunted dimensions existed in the minds and fantasies of Ong’s Hat’s many participants. That was evident as they responded to the original postings by uploading their own—all manner of reflections and artifacts: personal anecdotes, audio recordings, and videos—to augment what became “a really immersive world, and it was vast”. – The Chronicle of Higher Education—-

“Ong’s Hat was more of an experiment in transmedia storytelling than what we would now consider to be an ARG but its DNA – the concept of telling a story across various platforms and new media- is evident in every alternate reality game that came after.” – Games Magazine 2013

Though Ong’s Hat may not have set out to be an ARG, the methods by which the author interacted with participants and used different platforms to build and spread its legend has been reflected in later games. –Know Your Meme

The Incunabula Papers are arguably the first immersive online legend complex that introduced readers to a host of content, including what religious historian Robert Ellwood has called the “alternative reality tradition. – Legend-Tripping Online: Supernatural Folklore and the Search for Ong’s Hat

As a companion piece to understanding some of the history of the transmedia work that centered around Ong”s Hat you may also want to read Legend-Tripping Online: Supernatural Folklore and the Search for Ong’s Hat,  reviewed here.

The Incunabula Papers CDROM was recently included in the BNF (Bibliothèque nationale de France) digital art collection.

Game Over? (currently re-vamping this for re-release)…but if you just HAVE to have it now, someone is selling one for $900 over here. 😛

What Really Happened at Ong’s Hat?

The Incunabula Papers (CD ROM) Free ebook versions here

Incunabula: The Graphic Novel Free ebook version here

Why DVD? (B and N Digital Bestseller)

A booklet published in April-99

Over 100,000 in circulation to date

Available from booksellers nationwide in October reprinted by:

DVD Creation Magazine

Videography Magazine

(printed copy sent out with each issue – July,1999)

Video Systems magazine

and many others

Convergence 2000 (B and N Digital Bestseller) Free ebook version here

Covert Culture Sourcebook

Earth Dance 2000 (Video and DVD)

The Millennium Whole Earth Catalog 

Transmedia Litany (with Genesis P’Orridge)

Thee psychick bible

esoterrorist (publisher)

My idea for an Exquisite Corpse jacket blurb using faxes. (WSB missed inclusion by a day). Used on Esoterrist

Banishing Ritual (cover) with Illusion of Safety (audio here)

The Last Book

Also contributed a few articles to Bob and Arlen Wilson’s Trajectories.

A write up I did about my old friend Rob Brezsny for disinfo.com

Interview that I did with with Beat poet and author Diane DiPrima

Nina Graboi Interview, bOING bOING, Number 8 (written under my nom de plume: Michael Kelly)

I’ve contributed articles to AlwaysOn and Adotas. I’ve contributed book, music, and movie reviews to Gnosis and Magical Blend in the past as well as the old Boing-Boing print magazine and Fringeware Review. Note, in the interest of full disclosure, I’d sometimes contribute more than one article or review to a single publication and to avoid the appearance of saturation, I’d use the pen name: Michael Kelly for some of the articles.

Writing For a comprehensive list of most of my print work (not including magazine articles) see this list on Goodreads…

[ajw720]

Come on, you know there are several public pics of M and D together before his "Blaine' audition hair cut. IDK if you have been in a serious relationship but how it works is you start out seeing each there occasionally and then as you get closer and fall more in love you start doing more and more together until you get married. Being in a long distance relationship means that can all take a little longer. Going out more publicly AFTER she moved & over time is how that works.

Dearest Michigan,

I really do make an effort to ignore you and your nonsense, but I just could not resist. I know on your blog you have questioned my credentials, well I must say, I question yours and I highly recommend you enroll in a grammar school level reading comprehension program.First, who is disagreeing that they knew each other pre-g/lee?  That is a fact, a fact i state often and frequently and no one that I have encountered here who has any knowledge refutes this fact. Yet you keep repeating this like we are unaware, both in this ask, and in your absolutely comical analysis of the handshake completely based on the the false premise that we think this is when M&D met. Please stop putting words in our mouths and READ critically.

Second, I am not disputing that from 2010-2011 it was sort of low key, though by April 2011 she was already being speculated about in JJ with pap pics, so maybe we can say it quickly went from low to mid-key.

However, she was moved to LA in the fall of 2012 and from that moment forward there was nothing low or mid key about this.  That was SIX, count them (unless you need basic math classes as well) SIX years ago. Therefore, a publication CANNOT state that they have been low key dating since 2010. That is a boldface lie. They could say perhaps “they started out under the radar and have since decided to share” but NOT that it has been low key since 2010. 

Since 2012 she has accompanied him to approximately 75% of all of his events, her picture is taken constantly, her image is videoed, her SM is full of him, and recently his SM contains her face. Their “friends” and family talk about them on their public SM constantly, She has been interviewed about him (remember when she claimed she never wanted to be associated with someone famous), and she is mentioned in D’s press constantly and has been for YEARS.

So I am unclear why you are asking me about how a relationship works? I certainly understand how it works.  

Relationships dear michigan are based on love, friendship, and respect, Three fundamental things missing from the mi/arren relationshit.

Couples KNOW when they met and how long ago it was. But not mi/arren. Was it college?  Don Hi/ll’s? In NYC pre-g/lee?  They don’t know, but they will be sure to twist the answer each and every time asked. (D actually looked shocked when she said college). But you know what D knows in precise detail?  His mandate, when he went to see S/utton F/oster, a story he has recounted approximately  5 times, with g/olden g/lobe winning, NY T/imes best selling author C/hris C/olfer (his constant tribute not mine).

Couples know how long they have been dating.  Not m/iarren and you would THINK after the encage announcement they would stick to the very public timeline created, yet they don’t. She actually wants you to think they started dating in college, years before 2010.

When one proposes to their partner after “7 ½ crazy and adventurous years” I would hope they would know the person well enough to buy them a ring that they would love and cherish. And in turn I would hope the recipient loved the ring, even if not their dream, because it is a symbol of love and devotion. Not mi/arren, D apparently got in wrong FOUR times as she is now wearing ring number FIVE, an indisputable fact.  And no, multimillionaire D did not buy FOUR place holders.

Generally partners don’t run in front of the other constantly when they think they aren’t being filmed. D runs ahead of her constantly as documented many, many times. And notice how he ALWAYS tries to correct it when he sees the camera. They also aren’t afraid to touch their partner (D constantly avoids it, remember Op/eration S/mile when he was caught on film hiding his hand behind his bag to avoid touching her?).

A partner would NEVER try to steal the spotlight from the SO yet M pulls focus constantly despite the fact that it is D who put in the time and effort to receive the accolades he is currently getting.

A partner would respect that their partner has repeatedly stated that he craves privacy. Neither M nor any of their “friends” give two shits about his wishes as he is all over the internet as posted by this group.

A caring fiancee would concede an award show to allow for him to take his mom (d’s express wishes as he voiced on ET. And no if this is corrected it does not count as he called her out in a very public way).

Mature, wealthy adults in their 30s don’t have another wealthy adult living with them for, and i quote from D himself “many, many years.”  And no B/en didn’t crash on the couch as you have deluded yourself to believe, he fully lived (or lives) there.

A loving partner would not constantly mock and ridicule the other publicly, something she has done often (remember that time she called him douchebag on twitter?).  Nor would s/he mock and ridicule his fans and treat them like the lowest form of vermin. particularly if not kissing said person’s ass.

A partner that respects their SO doesn’t force them to perform in a bar nearly every single one of his/her days off, when it was evident the man was on the brink of collapsing from exhaustion, as M did for the duration of the summer.

I could go on and on and on about the issues with this horror show, but i will spare my readers.  But I will repeat something i have said often, the ONLY thing to me that would be sadder than reality, would be if this is real. Because they are the OPPOSITE of relationship goals and incredibly toxic as painfully evident in what they have allowed us to see.

Now i beg, please, please, please go back to your own blog where i can blissfully ignore you and leave me alone unless you an actually come back and produce a valid argument.

Love,

Me

[madscientistjournal]

I Didn't Break the Lamp: Interview with Sam Fleming

Today, we’re chatting with author Sam Fleming, who has a story in I Didn’t Break the Lamp!

DV: Tell us a bit about yourself!

Sam Fleming: I was born and raised in Scotland, spent almost two decades in various parts of England, and now live in a house built 130 years ago, along with my partner, my dog–an obstinate husky known as Floof–and Fingal, Shackleton, Max, Peregrine, Blackbird, Thokk, and Emily, who are all bicycles. I’m a multivariate egregore stacked up inside a human meat trenchcoat trying their best to pass well enough to avoid making people run screaming, and a highly trained scientist with a mutant brain who is employed to crack tough problems and negotiate complex solutions in the name of saving the world. I was on the British Junior Olympic archery squad until I damaged this entropic bag of bones and juices falling off a mountain. The armed services refused me admission when I was eleven years old and almost every year of asking thereafter. For a few years in the late nineties, I spent a lot of my time scaring fake Satanists away from an Oxfordshire stone circle. I collect fountain pen ink and hate having my hair cut. Some or all of the above may resemble the truth.

DV: What inspired you to write “Ludwig” for I Didn’t Break the Lamp?

SF: My first story for which an editor was prepared to pay, “What The Water Gave Her” in the Fish anthology from Dagan Books, was full of imaginary beings, all of them sea creatures. I had a story in Apex Magazine, which ended up in the Best of Apex Magazine Volume 1, in which there was an imaginary friend called Hedron. I love writing about them, and I love the ambiguity inherent in their existence. Are they real? What would it mean if they were? What does “real” mean? Something I randomly said in a conversation with a friend many many years ago has always stuck with me: “There are only two of us here, this is consensus reality.” So much of what we experience is generated inside the brain, and not all brains are the same. My own perception is somewhat awry and it’s impossible for me to step completely outside that frame of reference. I love having an excuse to show what the view is like from here.

“Ludwig” almost wrote itself in response to the prompt. A call for stories about imaginary friends! I couldn’t resist. There were a lot of little bits and pieces of things I’d stashed away in the back of my head, all swarming around in search of a tale to inhabit. I’ve been fascinated by the idea of felt presence since I first read about Shackleton’s epic crossing to the Stromness whaling station. Several years ago, I participated in a scientific study about imaginary friends, because they’ve been a big part of my life and formative experiences, and I suppose it continues to niggle that somewhere my experiences with such things are recorded in fairly comprehensive detail. Mad scientists … not so much, because I know plenty of scientists and not one of them is “mad” in the stereotypical sense of cackling “It’s ALIVE!” during thunderstorms, but shove an academic title on a villain and Bob’s your estranged relative.

DV: Your descriptions of the titular character, Ludwig, are both vivid and surreal. Did you have a visual inspiration for Ludwig, or was he concocted solely from your imagination?

SF: I’m synaesthetic. My senses are all cross wired into each other and especially my proprioception, which is the sense that tells you where your body is in space without you having to look. A lot of my descriptions are surreal, because I’m reverse engineering what I think might resonate with other people but keeping a certain synaesthetic gloss. As for Ludwig in particular, I first saw a short video of a featherstar on twitter a couple of years ago and was utterly mesmerised (you can see it here https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=rRej1VKDgcE, and there’s another good one here https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=OyketlthVWg). I’m not sure I could ever invent something that is weirder than creatures that already exist in the ocean. My first degree was in marine science, and I’ve done my fair share of peering at sea beasts, but I’ve never seen anything move like that, and dearly hope to see one in the flesh one day. I merely added the light and colour that, for me, inhabit that movement. And a bunch of extra arms.

DV: Your story includes descriptions of a handful of imaginary acquaintances. Were there any others that you would have liked to include that were cut for space, or others that you have thought of descriptions for now?

SF: There was a blobby, marshmallow thing called Henrietta that didn’t make the cut, and a flock of butterflies with razor-sharp wings that formed the shapes of other creatures, a bit like the fish in Finding Nemo. Honestly, I could probably talk about imaginary friends until my audience wandered off in search of a change of subject. I feel like I can reach out and open a door, somewhere off to my right and slightly up and in, and the next in line will step up. Maybe there’s a giant cosmic stash bag of creatures looking for a footprint in the world. There have been a surprising number of studies into imaginary friends, and what they look like/what they mean. One child had an entire herd of nappy-wearing cows. Another had a group of pre-schoolers, with whom she shared a language and a birthday. None of the imaginary friends in Ludwig are too far removed from what has been reported by scientists working in the field. Except Ludwig himself, of course.

DV: If you had an imaginary friend growing up, what was their name, and what were they like?

SF: I had loads. I had a roster. I had two friends, one a seal and one a dolphin, who came swimming with me on Thursday afternoons after school and taught me how to hold my breath for longer and swim faster. For a while I believed I was a selkie. I experienced an array of beings who donned vaguely human forms and told me secrets, but I wasn’t allowed to say anything about them or they would be angry. I had one who didn’t even try to conform to the conventional laws of physics, and who was better at maths than I was. Sometimes I would look at a stuffed animal instead of this being when talking to them, because it was easier on the eye. I have had more imaginary friends in my life than I have had actual physical ones, probably, and not all of them were friendly. I don’t know why, or where they came from. I don’t remember deliberately inventing any of them. More often than not they didn’t have names, because I didn’t talk about them, and we knew when we were talking to each other or about each other, so what was the purpose of names? They were invariably older than me, and seemed to know more about everything except really simple things, like why anyone would put ketchup on food, and if we were prepared to eat stuff that didn’t taste nice without ketchup, then why not make everything taste nicer by putting ketchup on it? Or hats. Why hats? I remember that question. “Why are hats?” They probably wondered why we didn’t put ketchup on hats, given that apparently some people are prepared to eat them when reality diverges sufficiently from expectation. My imaginary friends were even weirder than I was!

DV: What’s on the horizon for you?

SF: I’m going to my first WorldCon this year, in Dublin, which is exciting. I have a story called “Pretty Little Vampires” in the Not All Monsters anthology from Rooster Republic Press, due for publication next year. There aren’t any imaginary friends in that one. I have a few other pieces looking for a home, including a novella, and am working on a couple of novels while collecting notes and research for a third. I have hypergraphia, which isn’t nearly as helpful for fiction as you might think, but which does mean I’m always writing. At least when I’m not saving the world.

I Didn’t Break the Lamp: Interview with Sam Fleming was originally published on Mad Scientist Journal

[wellesleyunderground]

WU Reviews: Elizabeth Holmes and the Theranos Scandal

When brainstorming ideas for the next WU Review, we discovered that Tiffany Chan ‘15 had read Bad Blood, a book chronicling the rise and fall of Theranos; Cleo Hereford ‘09 had gotten the whole story via The Dropout podcast; and Shloka Ananthanarayanan ‘08 had watched the events unfold via the HBO documentary, The Inventor. Therefore, we three editors decided to combine forces to give you one mega-review about this fascinating story. Settle in!

Bad Blood reviewed by Tiffany Chan ‘15 (@omgitstiffyc)

Bad Blood: Secrets and Lies in a Silicon Valley Startup is a book written by John Carreyrou detailing the meteoric rise and fall of the blood diagnostics company Theranos. While many of us came to know this story relatively late in the game, John Carreyou was the Pulitzer Prize-winning reporter who originally broke the story of Theranos in 2015. The format of the book allows for the stories and characters involved in the downfall of Theranos to be developed richly.

The book takes the reader on an emotional rollercoaster ride. The beginning is a slow build, as Elizabeth starts the company. Over several years, the company grows steadily, and towards its late phase, it is a full sprint towards chaos. I was struck by how many people tried to stop Elizabeth Holmes and failed. Part of what makes this story enthralling is the number of people who simultaneously saw through the mirage and those who were sucked in. She managed to survive a for-cause audit by the FDA and almost being ousted as CEO by her board of directors. Then Vice President Joe Biden took a tour of her lab and was impressed by her work. Frankly, I started to wonder if she was some sort of Superwoman, immune to the rules us mere mortals live by.

While other accounts may focus on Elizabeth’s charisma, Bad Blood focuses on the people who were hurt by her actions. Each excited and talented employee was initially taken in by the promise of Theranos and all ultimately left disgraced and disappointed. The book underscored Holmes’ secretive, ruthless, and litigious nature where Theranos’ intellectual property was concerned. For me, this book also most clearly demonstrates Holmes’ failings as a leader. She made so many people collateral damage in the pursuit of personal glory. This point was most poignant in the case of Ian Gibbons, a long-time Theranos employee who was called to testify in court and tragically took his own life, balking under the pressure he was facing from the company to not say anything. Additionally, the narrator enters as a player in the third act and I found this to be really effective because we the readers empathize with him and understand his frustrations as he tries to tell this story while facing Theranos’ intimidation tactics. By building this cast of smart and relatable people, Carreyrou builds a sense of horror and outrage on multiple levels.

Simply put, this book was a trip for me to read because of all the ways it intersects with various aspects of my life. As someone who spent time working in the pharmaceutical industry, it was incredibly discouraging to hear about all the ways Theranos circumvented the checks and balances designed to keep people safe. While we might not be happy about all the regulatory hoops we need to jump through sometimes, they exist to ensure that our drugs and devices have been tested rigorously and I think people need to know that a majority of people in the industry take those standards incredibly seriously. As a Longwood Medical Campus student at the time, I can easily see how this young, female Silicon Valley CEO was lauded as THE lecturer of the year, the next big innovator. As a bench scientist, it was obvious to me from the beginning that Theranos’ pitch was pure fantasy but I had my doubts about whether I would have had the wherewithal to realize it without the gift of hindsight.

I liked the medium and content of Bad Blood because it underscores how much of Theranos was visual facade. Elizabeth LOOKED (and sounded, ha) like the next Steve Jobs. The Edison LOOKED beautiful when really it was just a sleek box with a robotic pipette inside. This story has been endlessly sensationalized in popular media but Bad Blood grounds us in what was the ludicrous and sometimes frightening reality for Theranos employees. I think this format allows for us to truly focus on the actions of the company and keep that in mind without getting sucked in by the ersatz company.

The Dropout reviewed by Cleo Hereford ‘09 (@cleoc87)

The Dropout is a 6-part podcast produced by ABC News and narrated by chief business, technology and economics correspondent Rebecca Jarvis about the emergence and downfall of Theranos CEO Elizabeth Holmes. Each episode is between 37 and 45 minutes, giving the listener a brief but comprehensive overview of Holmes, the founding of her company, and Theranos’ eventual demise. 

The podcast does more than simply narrate the series of events; it also includes interviews with a number of the key figures including Stanford Medical School Professor Dr. Phyllis Gardner (who heard early plans for The Edison technology and questioned its viability), whistleblowers Erika Cheung and Tyler Schultz, and Bad Blood author John Carreyrou.  The most striking interview, however, comes from the widow of Ian Gibbons, a biochemist who worked as Theranos’ chief scientist before taking his life in 2013 in the context of what is described as a toxic work environment and a pending patent lawsuit. 

What I walked away with after listening to The Dropout were the parts of the story perhaps touched upon but not fully highlighted in the hype surrounding the scandal: just how many lives were negatively impacted through the scheme either by Theranos’ work environment, the technology’s misdiagnoses, family disagreements or in Gibbons’ widow’s case, death, among the many issues that existed outside of or leading up to the truth behind Theranos being made public. Oftentimes, those affected by a particular person, organization or incident are forgotten in favor of whatever emblematic figure perpetrated the wrongdoing. The strength of The Dropout is that it does center Holmes while also highlighting the stories of and giving a voice to those she hurt. For those with longer commutes, I would fully recommend this highly engaging podcast.

The Inventor reviewed by Shloka Ananthanarayanan ‘08

My first thoughts upon starting this documentary - that lady really talks like that? I know we as a culture are entirely too obsessed with policing women’s looks and voices, but Elizabeth Holmes specifically cultivated her look (a wardrobe solely composed of black turtlenecks, à la her hero Steve Jobs) and apparently employed a fake voice, dropping down to a lower register, perhaps in the hopes that this would imbue her with more authority. Many people in the documentary also comment on her almost reptilian stare, and how she wouldn’t blink for ages. Thus, from the outset, you get a sense that this is a terrifically odd woman. And as the documentary progresses, you watch with spellbound horror as she cons some of America’s most senior business and political leaders, with seemingly no remorse once she gets caught. The woman is undoubtedly a villain, but she is a compelling one.

Directed by Alex Gibney, the film is a fascinating look at Theranos in particular, but Silicon Valley in general, and how entrepreneurs like Elizabeth Holmes can take advantage of certain loopholes and privatization to orchestrate scams of this magnitude. It’s well and good for Silicon Valley to embrace a model of disruption and to “keep breaking things,” but in the case of Theranos, when you are trying to create a revolutionary diagnostic product that human beings depend on for vital medical information, you can’t simply barrel ahead without appropriate testing, rigorous scientific discipline, and a basic understanding of regulatory compliance and ethics. The film features many interviews with employees, who initially started working at Theranos with bright-eyed optimism and visions of changing the face of healthcare, and who ended up disillusioned, terrified that they had harmed the public, and personally fearful of lawsuits and ruination. Through it all, we have Elizabeth Holmes as the Messiah, promising the world that she could diagnose hundreds of diseases by testing a single drop of blood, and lying through her teeth every time she was questioned about the technology behind this miracle.

Indeed, this film is about a cult of personality. At one point in the film, someone defines the word “credit” as deriving from the Latin “credo,” which means, “I believe.” Ultimately, Holmes managed to con many powerful people in America and make them blindly believe in her. She put many patients’ lives at risk as she sold a product that did not work and tried to orchestrate a cover-up that was laughably audacious and destined to come crashing down around her feet. I honestly don’t know how she thought she was going to be able to get away with her scheme, but it’s certainly thrilling to watch the faces of her employees as they detail what was happening in the office and get increasingly agitated as they realize the magnitude of the criminal enterprise they were involved in. 

If you don’t have time to read a book or listen to a podcast, The Inventor is a breezy 2-hour thrill ride through this scandal, and while it may not have all the details, it certainly has enough content to make you slightly sick to your stomach about how easily we can all be fooled by bright and shiny things that lack any substance whatsoever.