#this is kind of a funny one bc I read through it and I kinda wince sometimes – it's definitely not my best work

[pinkpastels113]

what are some of your favorite bechloe fics

hm hm i highly recommend you (all) to check out my bookmarks on ao3 (here's the rec only version) but my top favs and the ones that make me foam at the mouth are:

you're two steps forward (i'm one step back) by @becasbelt

ANGST where beca and chloe JUST missed each other sigh bc they are idiots

hold me tight (or don't) also by @becasbelt

relatable bc like beca i am also touch starved

This is Not a Kia Commercial (But It Sure Feels Like It) by wherehopelies

this one was funny sdfgfkfh (for the older bechloe fans: REMEMBER THE HAMSTER FIC LMAO)

she used to meet me on the east side and baby, i know places we won't be found by @cheapthrillsbeca

i remember the chaos when it was being live updated lmao. first one is a roommates kinda situation where beca has to go through chloe's room to get to hers (railroad apartment) and the second one is where they are famous!! celebrities & acting and spiciness ensue!!

show me your teeth same author again!!

this one needs to be separate bc i am a mess over vampire chloe i fear and beca has some Feelings when chloe drinks her blood

this is a beautiful start (to a lifelong love letter) by thelastpoisonapple

hogwarts au featuring ravenclaw beca and actually liking magic after falling in love with chloe

blues and purple pink skies by @pulledpurplecurtains

this fic is why i'm kind of a softie for childhood friends au fics now i fear BC HELP THEY ARE EACH OTHER'S COMFORT SINCE ELEMENTARY SCHOOL and a person really can change a lot as they grow up with a certain character!!! i feel like chloe has become more snarky due to having beca as a childhood best friend :>>

Winter Dreams (Beca's Song) by @lets-talk-appella

christmas fic that actually felt magical <33

My My How Could I Resist Ya? by @ridiculously-over-obsessed

mama mia au!! i actually read this before even watching the movie lol but it is so good!

i also recommend @someone--stupid and @suituuup 's fics!!

there are DEFINITELY a lot that i have missed esp since my marked for later page is 30 pages long SDJHSGFKF and since it's been a while since i've actively searched to read bechloe fics... (i've mostly just been reading works from mutuals and kind of deviating into other fandoms) but i do hope you (and anyone else who's curious) enjoy them!! lemme know what you think

[ryllen]

Look what came through the mail today! The letters & ( •̀ω•́ )σ 3 little gremlins from letterstoear.

Just wanna say i adore the flower stickers on the letters too much, they are that much worth mentioning.

[they-didnt-last]

anyone interested in talking about the iconic 2000's middle-grade-bordering-on-ya book series gallagher girls??

[stabyou]

anyone else's moods fluctuate such an insane amount that you basically shape shift into different people with different ideals and worldviews + personalities or do i have some other shit going on

[finxwrites]

Stranger Things fic, takes place immediately after season 2. also on ao3!

Waking up was a slow, unpleasant experience. Everything ached. Other sensations filtered in more slowly—the hum of machinery, the smell of antiseptic, the scratch of bedsheets against his skin, a distant background noise of sharp voices and brisk footsteps echoing together into a flat swirl of sound. A rustle of paper to his right. The scratch of a pencil.

The more fully Steve drifted into awareness, the more his head hurt. He tried to sink back into sleep, but the effort just woke him up more. Frowning against the pain sent sharp bursts of new, different pain across his face as he aggravated all the injuries there. By the time he blearily squinted his eyes open to see who was sitting next to him, he was in a terrible mood.

He’d been expecting—he wasn’t sure who, actually. He wasn’t awake enough to hope it might be his parents, which was good since it saved him the disappointment. Nancy, maybe. He didn’t know anyone else who would care enough to sit with him for hours in a hospital. But Nance was—Nance wasn’t his girl anymore. He couldn’t expect anything from her anymore.

Whoever he’d been expecting, he was completely unprepared for the sight of a middle schooler at his bedside. Dustin was jiggling a pencil absently in one hand while he read a textbook in his lap with fierce concentration. Steve stared at him, baffled. 

Dustin glanced up at him, and his face transformed completely. His grin was so huge and relieved that Steve actually got scared. Was he worse off than he’d thought? The doctors had said it was just a concussion, but what if they’d found something else while he was asleep? 

Before Steve could work up the energy and coordination required to open his mouth, much less formulate a question, Dustin yelled, “Steve! You’re awake!”

That was way too loud. Steve instinctively tried to pull away from the noise, but he was too fuzzy to do more than sort of curl into his shoulders like a geriatric turtle. 

“Sorry,” Dustin whispered. Somehow even his whispering was loud. “You have a concussion,” he said, bouncing in his seat. 

Steve gave him his best ‘no shit, Sherlock’ glare. 

“You gotta stay the night under observation,” he continued, undeterred, and then he was off: an impenetrable wall of babble as he rattled off all of Steve’s symptoms, the doctors’ proposed treatment plan (which was just painkillers and bed rest, as far as Steve could tell), the different types of concussion, warning signs to look out for in case Steve was actually going to keel over in three days, and a few miscellaneous fun facts about head trauma sprinkled in for flavor. There was no order, rhyme, or reason to the barrage of information. 

It was…sweet. In a really nerdy way. Steve was still in an annoying amount of pain, but his bad mood was somehow slipping away, even though Dustin’s volume had climbed again almost immediately to something that was doing Steve’s headache no favors. Steve gave up trying to follow what Dustin was saying after a bit and just lay there blinking vaguely. He figured the kid would eventually wind down on his own.

The kid did not wind down on his own. Instead he started showing Steve the medical textbooks he’d gotten from the library, and then the notes he was compiling on head trauma generally and concussions specifically. This was followed by an impassioned indictment of the library’s five-books-only policy, and then by the thrilling tale of how he’d stolen those medical textbooks right under the librarian’s nose.

“Shouldn’t you be in school?” Steve finally said. He didn’t think he’d slept more than maybe five hours. He was still bone-tired, and the sunlight slipping through the window blinds didn’t really feel like afternoon light.

Dustin, interrupted mid-word, scoffed and flapped a hand at him. “Lucas will take notes for me.”

Steve frowned, but he couldn’t find a way to ask what he really wanted to know. Why are you here? Aren’t you bored? Don’t you have anything better to do? Why do you care?

Dustin didn’t notice Steve’s confusion. He launched right back into his endless chatter, this time on the topic of hospital food and how much it sucked. Steve was too tired to interrupt him again.

Eventually a nurse came in to check on Steve. Dustin sat on the edge of his seat through the whole interaction, asking a thousand questions. The nurse glanced at Steve a few times like he might object, which was probably a good thing for, like, medical consent reasons or whatever, but Steve truly didn’t care what Dustin knew or didn’t know about Steve’s stupid concussion. He shrugged the nurse’s concern away every time.

The nurse gave Steve a fresh round of drugs, and Dustin strict instructions to let Steve rest. Dustin nodded solemnly. When the nurse left, he actually stayed silent, bending his head back over his textbook and going back to his notes. He shot Steve furtive little looks every fifteen seconds, and then smiled a little awkwardly every time at being caught. 

Steve felt kind of like he should say something, but he had no idea what. Thank you, probably, but that felt somehow too blunt, too raw. So he stared at the ceiling and pretended he couldn’t feel Dustin’s eyes on him.

The drugs kicked in after some twenty minutes. Steve slipped gratefully into a dreamless sleep. 

*

The next time Steve drifted toward consciousness, it was to a pitched argument over…pork?

He recognized the voices, but it took longer than it should have to place them. Drugs, he eventually realized. That was probably why nothing hurt. 

“But porks are evil!” someone said, nonsensically. It was possible the drugs were affecting more than just his pain receptors.

“Not half-porks,” said someone else. “Or at least, they don’t have to be.”

“Okay, that’s true,” conceded the first voice. “But they’re still, like, assumed to be evil.”

“Plus they have a charisma penalty,” said a third voice, like that settled it. Dustin, Steve thought. 

“I don’t see the problem,” muttered the second voice. Steve had heard that particular tone of aggrieved sarcasm a dozen times before, at family dinners with Nancy—that was Mike.

“It doesn’t work,” Dustin insisted. “He should have a charisma buff. Shut up, Mike, you know it’s true. Nancy wouldn’t have gone for him otherwise. And he’s, like, king of the jocks.”

“You gotta admit,” said someone new, “the club does look kind of like the nail bat.”

“But he’s not evil,” the first voice said stubbornly. Steve finally recognized it as Lucas. And then realized, confusedly, that they were talking about him.

And also pork, for some reason. “He doesn’t have to be evil,” Mike said exasperatedly. “Half-porks are strong. They get knocked down, they get up again. It fits.”

“I guess.” Lucas didn’t sound entirely convinced. “I still say he should be an elf. Maybe a sylvan elf, they get a bonus to strength, don’t they?”

Steve forced himself all the way awake out of sheer bafflement. “What are you gremlins talking about?” he rasped.

Four voices yelled, “Steve!” all at once. Steve groaned and regretted his choices.

“Quiet!” Dustin said, very loudly. “He got fucking whack-a-moled, guys, he’s got the mother of all headaches. We gotta be quiet.”

Steve did not have the mother of all headaches, because Steve was on the good shit and couldn’t even feel his face. He elected not to mention this, on the off chance that something might actually induce the little fuckers to pipe down.

There was a chorus of apologies. The fourth kid—not Will; with a herculean effort, he realized it had to be Max—asked, “How are you feeling?”

Steve laughed. It came out as kind of a gross snorting sound, which was how he discovered one of his nostrils was blocked. Probably with blood, he reflected sadly. The gross snorting turned into a cough, which for some reason precipitated another eruption of yelling. Small hands pressed into Steve’s shoulders, pushing him upright. Someone shoved a paper cup into his face hard enough to dent the cup and tipped water into his mouth. Steve managed, at the last minute, to close his lips around it so he wouldn’t dribble all over himself.

It hurt to swallow while his body was still trying to cough, but it was better than spewing water everywhere. And it did help—it didn’t soothe his cough so much as choke it into submission, but whatever. If it worked, it worked. And by the time the cup was empty and his coughing had given up and subsided, Steve was fully awake.

He peered around blearily. Lucas and Dustin were holding him upright, one on each side. Mike was leaning over him, paper cup in one hand, wide-eyed with worry. The worry turned to disdain the second Steve looked at him, and he pushed away with a huff to drop into a chair against the wall behind Dustin.

Max was in the chair next to him, a three-ring binder in her lap. The unformed sarcasm on Steve’s tongue died at the guilty, hunted look on her face. “I’m fine, kid,” he said instead. “I’m super high, I feel great.”

Apparently that wasn’t the right thing to say. Max just looked alarmed now. “From the drugs,” Steve clarified. 

This did not seem to improve things. Dustin patted his shoulder. “That’s great, buddy.” He sounded like he had in the car on the way to the tunnels, like Steve was some kid he was baby-talking. Steve fished for a suitably scathing comeback to put him in his place. 

Dustin and Lucas lowered him gently back to the bed while he was still fishing. They both looked so concerned that Steve felt bad for trying to come up with an insult, so instead he asked, “What’s a half-pork?”

They both blinked at him in bafflement for a moment, which was vaguely gratifying for some reason—reciprocity, maybe, it was only fair that Steve not be the only confused person in the room—and then Lucas’s face contorted as he tried desperately to hold back a gale of laughter. “Do you mean half-orc?” he wheezed. 

This set Dustin to guffawing, and Mike followed soon after. Lucas slumped over onto Steve’s lap, shoulders shaking silently. “Pork!” Dustin squeaked, and Mike laughed harder. Even Max was giggling. 

Steve looked around at them all, deeply put out. It was stupid to be hurt that a bunch of middle schoolers were laughing at him, but he was very high, and he still had no idea what the hell they were saying. “Fine,” he grumbled. “Whatever. Wake me up when I’m less drugged, I guess.”

“Sorry,” Lucas gasped. “Sorry. It’s just—”

“We’re not laughing at you, we’re just really glad you’re okay,” Dustin said, grinning like the sun. Steve swallowed around a sudden inexplicable lump in his throat. 

“We are also totally laughing at him,” Max pointed out. 

Steve pouted at her. Her smile shrank, overtaken by that wary, hunted look.

Before Steve could do more than stare at her in confused dismay about it, Mike said importantly, “A half-orc—not pork, oh my god—is a character race in Dungeons and Dragons. They’re huge and strong. And orcs usually fight with a club, which is basically a fantasy baseball bat.”

“We’re trying to figure out what you should play in DnD,” Dustin explained. “I say you’d be a human fighter. Maybe a cavalier.”

Steve blinked at him. He considered pointing out that he already was a human fighter, or at least he was a human who got into fights every year around Halloween. Then he considered pointing out that he was never going to play their weird nerd game anyway, so it didn’t matter. But apparently his input in this conversation was not required, because no one paused long enough to hear what he thought of any of it.

Mike snorted. “What, because he has a car?”

“I mean, yeah,” Dustin shrugged, “it’s like a modern war horse, isn’t it?”

“Nah,” Lucas said, a teasing edge to it, “I think that makes him a zoomer.”

Steve gave up. None of this was going to start making sense any time soon, not with the amount of drugs he was on and possibly just not ever. He had no idea why there were four children spouting gibberish in his hospital room, but he didn’t have the energy to even begin trying to get rid of them. He lay back and resigned himself to being babbled over.

And anyway, it was kind of nice to have some company. Even if it was a bunch of nerdy twerps who mostly ignored him.

Mike huffed. “There’s no such thing as a zoomer.”

“There is now,” Lucas said, blatant adoration suddenly all over his face as he looked over at Max. Max squirmed in her seat, but she was fighting down a smile.

“That was pretty awesome,” Dustin agreed, giggling a bit. “Come on, Mike, you gotta admit it was badass.”

Mike rolled his eyes, but he was suppressing a smile too. “It was kinda badass,” he allowed. 

“It was totally badass,” Lucas corrected.

Dustin laughed. “It was bitchin’.”

Apparently that was some kind of inside joke, because all the boys laughed. Max was grinning now, small and pleased. 

Her smile vanished when she saw Steve looking at her. She flinched and glanced quickly away. Steve frowned, bewildered. Did she not like him or something? But she didn’t seem mad, she just kept looking kind of hunted. Was she scared of him? Shit, did Steve remind her of Billy? Maybe she was scared of any older guy, considering what her asshole brother was like. But she hadn’t seemed scared of Steve before, not at the junkyard and not at the Byers’ house. Was it because she’d seen him fight Billy? Did she think Steve was violent like Billy, that he’d be violent with her?

Steve stared at the ceiling, sick to his stomach. The kids kept talking, but he couldn’t focus on their voices. A little girl was scared of him. And not just any girl, but one who’d taken the existence of monsters in stride, who hadn’t hesitated to make herself bait for demodogs just so El could have a better chance of reaching the gate. These kids were some of the bravest people Steve had ever met, and one of them was scared of him.

Max thought Steve was worse than monsters from the Upside Down.

Dustin jostled his shoulder. “Steve. Steve! Are you okay? Are you in pain?”

Dustin and Lucas were both leaning over him. Steve looked between them in confusion. “What? What’s wrong?”

“You’re crying,” Lucas said. He looked spooked. 

“I am not!” Steve squawked. He blinked a few times and was horrified to find that his eyes were, in fact, a little watery. “Stupid goddamn drugs,” he swore. “I’m fine. Don’t worry about it. Ugh.” 

“Should we call a nurse?” Lucas asked. “Do you need more painkillers?”

“He can’t have another dose yet!” Dustin cried before Steve could answer. “It’s too soon, it’ll fuck him up!” He jostled Steve’s shoulder again. “Are you in pain?” he demanded, sounding almost scared. “Because if you are then the drugs aren’t working and that’s a big deal, okay, we have to tell the nurse, so you gotta tell us—”

“I’m fine!” Steve swatted at his hand. “I swear, dude, you can calm down. I was just—thinking. The drugs are making me emotional, that’s all.”

Dustin’s eyes narrowed. “What are you emotional about?”

“Nothing!” Steve shoved at him ineffectually. “Jeez, let a guy be concussed in peace, won’t you?”

“We can go,” Max said in a small voice. Steve looked past Dustin and found her shutting the binder in her lap and slipping it into a backpack at her feet. Her shoulders were hunched up almost to her ears.  “We shouldn’t be bugging you, not after—Come on, guys, he needs to rest.”

“Hey, no,” Steve said, regretting every drop of irritation. “That’s not what I mean. You guys can stay.”

Max’s eyes flicked up to him and then away again, almost too fast to see. “I know you don’t want a bunch of stupid kids hanging around being annoying while you’re—” She swallowed, cutting herself off. 

“I don’t mind,” Steve said helplessly. He didn’t know how to convince her that he was nothing like Billy, that he’d never get mad at her like that, that she didn’t have to be afraid. 

“But I—” She glanced up at him again, and this time her gaze lingered long enough for him to see the overwhelming guilt in her eyes. And Steve realized that he was an idiot. 

She wasn’t afraid he’d hurt her. She was afraid he’d hate her, because her asshole brother beat his face in.

“I don’t mind,” he said again, because he couldn’t figure out how to say, I’m the one who punched him, I knew what I was getting into, better me than any of you. “Just—sit down. Tell me what the hell a zoomer is.”

The wary suspicion on Max’s face was heartbreaking. “Please?” Steve tried. It came out a little bit desperate. He had no idea what he’d do if she stormed out. Nothing, probably, he had no goddamn clue how to talk to children, but also he might cry about it because the drugs really were wreaking havoc on his emotions. 

She didn’t storm out. She also didn’t do anything else. She just stood there, frowning at him in deepening uncertainty, searching his face for—a lie, maybe, or the moment when he’d turn around and say no, actually, she could go fuck herself.

“Max is a zoomer,” Lucas said into the silence. “She’s the party zoomer. She gets us where we need to go.”

He said this like it was super important and meaningful or something. Dustin nodded approval. Mike smiled a little ruefully. “Yeah,” he agreed, “party zoomer.”

Max unhunched a little at that. She looked to Steve again, raising her eyebrows a bit like, Are you sure? Steve nodded hurriedly. “Sounds cool,” he said inanely. “Party zoomer.”

Slowly, watching him the whole time, Max sank back into her chair. Steve did his best to project approval and acceptance and all that shit, but he was pretty sure it was the relief he accidentally let through when she finally sat all the way down that brought something almost like a smile to her face. 

He grinned back, too wide like an idiot. He was absolutely blaming that on the drugs. She rolled her eyes and turned away, but this time she was still smiling when she did.

“I guess we could homebrew a zoomer class,” Mike said. That must have meant something good, because Lucas beamed at him. In another moment the boys were all throwing nonsense words back and forth at each other. Steve lay back, not bothering to pay attention, content to just watch their excitement. 

Max chimed in from time to time, though from the boys’ reactions it was clear she had no more idea than Steve what the hell they were talking about. But she was laughing. Every once in a while she’d glance sidelong at Steve, and when he caught her at it he made sure to smile at her. The tension seeped out of her, a little more each time, until at last she was just as bright and happy as the boys.

Steve fell asleep to the sound of incomprehensible bickering. His last, wistful thought before he did was that he hadn’t felt this peaceful in months.

[poptartmochi]

breeze wiki coming out of left field and flipping the table on the gioiaverse 🤪🍻

[moonstruckme]

hiii! so i’ve just recently started reading ur work and i love it sm ur amazing! so i just wanted to request smth and it’s a little random but i was wondering if you could do something with remus/james where reader gets uncomfortable around drunk ppl bc that’s how i am because of some things in the past so maybe she gets uncomfortable and he gets kinda protective? sorry that was a lot but if u don’t write this rhats perfectly fine i just wanted to say i love your work!🩷

Thanks lovely <33

James Potter x fem!reader ♡ 825 words

Really, you ought to know better than to walk around this part of town on a weekend night. You’d just wanted a pint of ice cream so badly, and this is the nearest store with the kind you like. You hadn’t thought it through, how these would be the peak hours for the bars that line the majority of the street, how the sidewalks would fill with too-loud patrons laughing and stumbling about. 

It’s not that you really even feel unsafe. The area is too crowded for most of the men to try anything, and James is with you to deter anything like that anyway. It’s just…a lot. The slurred shouts, and the unpredictable movements, and the stink of vomit. 

James drifts closer to you, taking your hand to help guide you through the crowd. He knows how you feel about drunk people. Even him and his friends, who you love and know would never intentionally make you uncomfortable, feel odd to be around after they’ve been drinking. 

James glances over at you. “You good?” 

“Yeah.” You do your best to appear less tense, smiling at him. “Thanks.” 

He gives your hand a light squeeze, moving the both of you this way and that to avoid groups that have stagnated or slowed on the sidewalk. You can’t help but stare as a girl a few paces ahead of you falls onto her bum on the curb, laughing deliriously as her friends try to help her back up. There’s a group of boys in front of you with their arms linked over each other’s shoulders, open drink containers in several of their hands as they mosey down the sidewalk, singing out of tune and at seemingly different parts of the same song. If you were one of them, it would probably all seem funny and lighthearted to you, too. There’s nothing nefarious about this; they’re just people enjoying a Friday night. And still, you can’t help but feel awkward and on edge around them. 

You feel the shock of cold before you know what’s happened, freezing liquid streaming down your shirt. You gasp and flinch into James on instinct, and the drunken man follows you inadvertently, his now empty beer bottle tipped over your shoulder and his weight pressing into you as he tries to hold himself up on nonfunctioning legs. 

James’ hand skims over your upper back as he moves around to your other side, taking the guy by the shoulders and lifting him off of you. The man starts to babble angrily, but James only gives him one of his easy smiles. You’d have to really know him to be able to tell he doesn’t mean it. 

“Easy, mate,” he says, delivering the man back to his group of friends behind you. His tone changes slightly when he addresses them, still friendly but with a slightly harder edge. “Keep track of your friend, yeah?”

The group of boys says various things in the affirmative, but James has already turned away. He shepherds you over to the wall of the closest building, out of the flow of foot traffic, and puts himself between you and the people passing by. 

“Shit, sweetheart,” he says, taking off the flannel he’s wearing over his t-shirt. “He really spilled all over you. Are you alright?”

“Yeah,” you say, though you really are very cold now. You take James’ flannel without complaint, shrugging it on. “Yeah, I’m good. Thanks.”  

“So fucking irresponsible,” he huffs, shaking his head as he adjusts the thick fabric to cover the wet streak down the side of your shirt. “I mean, who lets their mate get that sloppy and then walk around by themselves? I could never do that.” 

You smile at him. “I know you couldn’t, Jamie. You’re a good friend.” 

He grins back at you, taking you under his arm as you begin walking towards the store again. It looks casual, a boyfriend with his arm slung loosely over his girl’s shoulders, but you can feel the tension in his bicep as he keeps you close, maneuvering you carefully through the crowd. 

“I think those guys were just too drunk to keep track of him,” you go on. “Not everyone can have as good a friend as you.” 

James scoffs, but you don’t let him dodge the compliment. 

“I’m serious.” You bump his hip lightly. “I bet none of those guys would have given me their jacket when it was this chilly out. You’re one in a million.” 

“Great,” James says. “So now my accolades are that I don’t let my friends fall all over people when they’re drunk and I give pretty girls my jacket when they’re soaking wet in the cold.” You’re looking ahead of you, but you can hear the eye roll in his voice even as he presses a quick kiss to the side of your head. “Your bar’s frighteningly low, angel. We’re gonna have to work on that.”

[thatfreshi]

Appreciate the Astarion works!!! 💙💙💙

If you'd like another request, what about Tav gifting him something that allows him to see his reflection? Idk some kinda spell/amulet/potion? They're already to the point where he feeds from them or in a relationship and he's just beyond touched/ shocked they would do something for him like this? (Bc we know he's not ever had the most kindness shown to him)

he's been living rent free in my head and I just want to give him everything his undead lil heart desires.

Recommended Song: Mirrorball - Taylor Swift

(I just started listening to her music and holy shit this song is so them!!!)

It's late, the perfect time of day for the two of you. You and Astarion and out in your backyard, putting out some new furniture that he haggled for today. It's hard to say no to that smile, you would know. As you move nice chairs around debating where you should put them, you get into a playful argument.

"I know you're like, the house decorator, but gods why can't we put it in this corner?"

"Because darling, it'll ruin the feng shui. We should put the chairs here instead, and keep the plants over here."

You roll your eyes.

"I bet you don't even know what feng shui means."

"I don't, but it sure sounds fancy doesn't it?"

You giggle.

"What, I'm laughable because I don't know one tiny phrase? I bet there are plenty of words you don't know."

"Well, I don't know them, so I'm not worried about them."

You saunter over to him, throwing your arms up around his shoulders, and the two of you stare at each other for a moment.

"You know our anniversary is tomorrow right?"

"How could I forget my sweet?"

"I don't know, maybe the way you forgot what feng shui means."

"Okay, ouch. But yes of course, I have wondrous plans for the two of us."

"Okay but you can't have that good of plans because I really need to make sure you don't one-up this."

You walk back into the house for a brief moment, grabbing a scroll out of your bag.

"When I walked away while we were at the market, because I said I got tired of hearing you argue with that old lady? Well, I found this."

You hold the scroll out, and he gently grabs it out of your hands.

"I tried to get Gale to teach me, but you know I'm not very magically inclined so..."

He unrolls the scroll, reading the scrawled writing.

"This is-"

You cut him off in excitement.

"Mirror image! I thought maybe you could use it to make a reflection of yourself."

He stares at the scroll in shock.

"How much did you pay for this?"

"None of your damn business."

You grin at him, knowing all too well that you paid that guy way too much.

"This is very sweet my dear, I... I don't know what to say."

"Well you don't have to say anything, try it!"

After reading for a moment, he goes to cast the spell. He says a few words that go right over your head, and suddenly there were three more Astarions in your backyard.

"Gods!"

Astarion's cry of shock echoed through, all four of him? You're not quite sure how this works. After getting his bearings, Astarion looks around at his three reflections.

"Wow, this is certainly... wow."

You're so excited, you can finally show him all the little details you like about him, he gets to see how gorgeous he is, the list goes on and on.

"Okay, I have to do something funny, because I NEED you to see your little laugh lines. Hm..."

He furrows his brow at you, wondering what you're planning. And then you tickle his sides, causing an eruption of laughter.

"Quick, look!"

As he's still smiling, he catches a glimpse of one of the reflections, the little crow's feet he gets when he laughs.

"Oh, that was so important you had to attack me? If anything they make me look old."

"Well... you are kinda old."

He playfully pushes your shoulder. After the two of you quiet your laughter, he stands staring at one of the reflections, taking it all in. The eyes, the hair, trying to remember what he used to look like.

"What do you think?"

"I think... I think it's fitting."

He snarls to look at his fangs. Astarion has never seen just how menacing he can be, why people listen to him when he's threatening. You don't see anything scary though. Maybe you used to, long long ago. But now, he's just Astarion. That's all he has to be.

"This red really is quite bright."

He says, commenting on his eyes.

"Yeah, they're nice though. Piercing."

"At least my hair looks as good as I think it does. All my efforts haven't been wasted."

And just as fast as they came, the reflections vanish, fading out of existence. It's just the two of you again.

"Damn, I thought it would last a little longer."

You frown a little, wondering if it was really worth it. Astarion catches your glance, realizing your doubt. He tilts your chin up and cups your face in his hand.

"Even if it was short, it was a wondrous gift darling. I appreciate it, truly. Besides, now I know what kind of handsome devil you've ended up with."

"Yeah, trust me, I know."

You wrap yourselves up in each other, locking lips, somehow sharing your gratitude for each other in kisses. He gets a little handsy, and you jokingly whisper to him.

"Should've done this with the reflections."

He laughs quietly.

"Oh hush."

You end the evening tangled up in each other, and he seems to be more sure of himself than usual. Turns out seeing yourself after two hundred years can do something for the ego. Maybe one day, you'll find a more permanent soluton, but for now, one little scroll is enough. He's enough. You're both enough, as long as you have each other.

[waechan]

hi~ I loved your nct dream small moments (the maknae line is def my fave but alsksksk all of them are cute!) so my request (it could be a blurb or a drabble) is this: meeting nct dream for the first time (as strangers, coworkers, idols, classmate?) 🥹 it's okay if you can't get to it asap^^

hi! first off tysm for reading my work, i'm so glad you enjoy it! and second, ty for your request bc this idea is adorable so im making little drabbles for each member separately. first is mark:)

⁀➷

pairing: mark lee x reader

genre: fluff

wc: 1.1k

meeting mark for the first time (classmates)

he seemed cool.

everyone loved him. he was popular for being a genuine, kind soul. you had never understood what the hype was about him. you guess, sure, he was cute, sure, he was kind. but whatever, right? you two were classmates, and shared a couple of classes together. you were both unsure of what your major was, so it was quite funny how the two of you somehow ended up taking the same random classes.

at the moment, your class was at the aquarium on a trip for marine biology. it was a fun class, and on the plus side, you got to learn about animals and stuff so that was pretty cool.

"circle up guys!" your professor, mr. johnson, calls out. you walk with your friend yeri towards him, staying close together, just in case he would try to split the two of you. "alright, we're taking a break from some serious learning today, and we're just gonna soak in the beauty of the ocean and its wildlife." little drabbles of conversations and mumbles start to form, but then mr. johnson puts his hands out.

"now, before you guys get too excited, i do have a scavenger hunt for you all, so don't get too excited!"

you give yeri a look and shrug a bit. "could be worse." she says. "i will number you off into groups!" mr. johnson says as he starts to scramble around, and immediately starts counting people off. "you were saying?" you deadpan as you look at yeri and the two of you roll your eyes at the exact same time, smirking a bit in amusement. of course, the two of you end up getting separated and you go to find your group, but you can't find the one with your number. "uh, mr. johnson?" you call out as you raise your hand up tentatively, and he walks right on over to you. "yes, what is it y/n?" he says distracted, not really listening as he looks around, checking to make sure everything is in order. "um, i don't have a group? can't find my number." you exclaim as you shrug. it didn't really bother you, you could just go with yeri.

he scans the area as he purses his lips, as if searching for a group to put you in. come on y/n, take your chance.

"uh- it's okay! i can just go with yeri-" you don't get to say much as he cuts you off before you can continue, and smiles wide as he starts speaking to another student who starts to walk your way.

"how about you go in his group?" he suggests, not really giving you a choice as he shoves you towards the unknown figure of a person who is now next to you.

"who's-" you turn around.

"oh, hey." he says, waving a bit awkwardly.

...

great.

just wonderful.

"y/n, meet mark. mark, meet y/n. now the two of you have fun." he gives you both a pat on the shoulder and immediately walks off, shoving a clipboard with a list in your hands. you wince as you force yourself to look up and acknowledge the boy in front of you.

okay, cool.

scavenger hunt with THE mark lee? no big deal, stay calm. calm.

"so i guess we're partnered together?" he asks as he runs his hand through his hair, doing that squint thing with his eyes he always does when he's thinking. damn. you kinda get it now. "yeah, um. i'm y/n, but you already know that, cause. well."

just stop talking.

"OKAY! let's go look for the first item. or fish, or whatever." you say as you start walking off without him, and you hear him follow you. "okay, yeah, alright. i guess." he mumbles, as he trails behind. on the way to the section of the aquarium you have been directed towards, you sneak a look back, just to make sure he was still following you. and he was, but... you had never seen anyone look at something with such admiration in ones eyes before. he was standing there, frozen, as he stopped by one of the glass windows that displayed the fish behind them. your heart stops for a second as he turns around and your eyes meet. he smiles. at you.

"i think i found it."

you walk over to him, forcing yourself to snap out of your gaze as you stop, standing next to him, and you look at the fish. it was something you had never seen before, a gorgeous coral and white color.

"woah." you whisper, and he chuckles.

"i know."

"it's beautiful." you say softly as you grab your phone to take a picture of the fish. "who knew this class could be cool?"

"i know." he repeats, gently, as he turns his line of vision towards you and he stares at you for a couple of seconds, the corner of his mouth tilting up in amusement at your reaction. "maybe this will get you to stay awake in class?" he whispers this into your ear, then pats your shoulder as he starts to walk away, eyes sparkling.

your jaw drops open almost immediately, and you blush a bit in embarrassment as you go to catch up to him. "hey!" you call out as you walk quickly to go and catch up with him. "you know those rants that mr. johnson goes on, he's always rambling on and on about his new home renovation that he's getting, and his new date that he has each week. oh, and his new diet that doesn't ever work out for him! i don't get how you could find that interesting-" mark chuckles a bit as he shrugs with his hands in his pockets. "i don't know about you, but i love to hear about mr. johnson's love life. and the diets." he stops walking, and you do as well, crossing your arms as you look up at him. all of a sudden, he leans forward and bends down so his eye level is at yours.

the air inside your lungs and the words you are about to say back to him disappear instantly.

the quietness of the room is deafening, and you swear you hear the sound of your heart beating in your chest.

"it's alright, y/n." he looks back and forth between your eyes. "i'm sure he forgives you." he says quietly, before he ruffles your hair and walks off once again without you. you stand there, still. your heart, still racing.

you stand there for a couple seconds until he turns around, tilting his head at you as he smirks in success. "you coming?"

⁀➷

lmk what u think! my first drabble<3

[faunandfloraas]

Aussie question time: when I find out an idol is American/Canadian, their image in my mind completely changes because now it’s like “Oh I know exactly who you are, I grew up with your type around me” there are subtleties that I’m going to understand that others might not. So with all that said, I’ve been curious about what that’s like (if you experience it) w the skz aussies (throw in a lily if you’re feeling it -v-) 🎤

this is wayyyyyy too long so I'm putting it under a read more- also disclaimer: i dont know these guys and these are just my opinions, dont take em too srs <3

Hmmmm... Well I guess I'll start with Felix- I've said it before a bunch but the whole "Felix is a tiny uwuw baby sweet summerchild who is just such a baby" etc. etc. has made me laugh from the get go- because Yep! he is incredibly sensitive and sweet natured and kind and he cries a lot- 100% that is true. Dont think I'm saying it's not. But like. He also grew up in western sydney, he grew up in a area that if you google it one of the first suggestions is "is it safe" but then at the same time he went to private catholic school im pretty sure. and i saw pics from back then that he'd posted back in the day of cool little felix with his gold watch and his fade and all his little homeboys looking rowdy on the train- I know that kid and while that kid can also be sweet and sensitive, he's not incapable and hes not a baby. Good recent example was when he went on that Jewel box show with the gay dudes and people were acting like he was *so uncomfortable* and sooooo out of his element and so this and so that- theres gay dudes all over sydney, there's gay dudes all over australian media- the idea felix couldnt handle that was simply laughable to me- but it kinda shows how many outside perceptions of him still very much fall into that vaguely infantalizing thing. Like when he was the one who was happy to go up to adam levine and dj snake in that skz talker while the other boys were much more shy? that didnt shock me at all. felix went to korea as a whole teenager laregly against his parent wishes- he's actually quite an outgoing and brave guy. Outgoing guys can still be sweeties, though- one doesn't negate the other.

One other aspect of Felix i think a lot of fans just gloss over but is easily noticeable by me is that he can kindaaaaaa be ... a lil bitchy? like he's never ever mean or cruel dont get me wrong- but he has a slight bitchy streak, he rolls his eyes AND he's actually much more sarcastic than people bring up? Again- he does it a lot with Chan and that doesnt shock me- they both are aussie boys, Chan will get it and I think Felix can very much be himself with Chan, he doesn't necessarily feel the need to put up an extra air of like... Sweetie boy-ness? bc when he calls chan a cunt on live chan just laughs and goes OI!! so yuh the main thing with felix is while i do think hes a little sweet guy, ive never from the get go had a hard time seeing him outside of that box, too. Also maybe that's a lil bit aussie humour slipping under the radar here or there 🤔

Chan to me from the get go too was pretty much like. Prototypical overachieving aussie Good Boy. Like, i had a drafted post i never posted bc it was too niche- but it was essentially about how he speaks about sports and the like, and it just said "We get it. You went to zone carnival" which was the sporting event that the kids who got gold or 1st place were sent to. If you went to zone, you were the Successful kid. I think these days most fans perceive him as... a bit of a goofy guy? but I have gone through the archives and i have seen the comments from people talking about how chans such a bad boy- thats shit is so funny to me bc you can show me every iteration of chan and I'd never, ever think he's a bad boy. Like he wishes he was a bad boy, he kinda cosplays a bad boy- even him referencing swearing bc of his australianess and shit over the years makes me giggle a little bc i feel like felix def 100% swears all the time but he doesnt like Smirk about it too much? he doesnt really bring it up? things like that stand out, it to me feels very like Oh yeah I'm this naughty Aussie boy who swears hehe and then all the australians are like ? Girl we all do huh lmao

Otherwise, I dont have as much to say about chan as i do about felix, funnily. Like idk people might perceive differently to me, but nothing too far off? I will say that given Chan's success and the fact he was seemingly a very well achieving kid too (maybe not debuting for such a long time is part of this) he is WAY more humble than I'd expect. Like not to besmirch Australian men but a lot of them can be really loud and cocky, especially the famous successful ones (any sport star) it's almost encouraged to be like that if you're a dude (but only to a certain degree, anything beyond a certain point and you'll be roasted lol) So I have to give credit where it's due and say that Chan *Seemingly does have a very good nature and I appreciate that about him! Its probably why I like him so much bc he actually very much doesn't give off those vibes- he doesn't seem like that overly macho cocky bloke I know very well. So that makes him good fun for me- he's very successful and he's confident and yet he doesn't activate any of my bitch instincts- thats impressive! I don't know him, so I'll never know for sure of course, i feel like i need to make that disclaimer but still I do believe he has a good heart, and he tries so hard! and I appreciate that.

Lily is weirdly like Chan. like she's hilariously like chan tbh- I wonder how they really get along sometimes bc I feel like they might look at each other and be like Hm... we the same............ ? Lmao I will say though, lily is a bit out of pocket and half of that I believe is her personality but half of it is just.... I think she's just australian 😭 like i cant lie you get me as a teenager to early 20 something and put me on a live and I can promise I would be saying as much ?? shit. Like, I do think Australians are a little loud and not necessarily always.... tactful (again Not everyone, but yk.) lily certainly fits that bill to a T. I appreciate that regardless of her idolhood she does still say things that maybe she shouldn't, she shrugs off a shoplifting confession, she says she'd murder someone if she had to, she bought and wore a shirt that fans quickly tracked down and found out all the proceeds were going to Palestine- she would have known what that suggested. she clearly had this goal of being an idol since she was a baby, like literal baby but she hasn't sacrificed her broader personality, even the parts that could potentially be off-putting to those idol fans that expect perfection and nothing else. I appreciate that in her! and I hope she never loses her little weird girl spark bc it does make her very dynamic! Her slightly gruff aussie girlness is very fun for me to see in the idolsphere bc it def feels out of place, but in a refreshing way...

so yeah. Idk if this was sensical, I was making dinner so I put my phone down a bunch and it's probably disjointed but thats my opinion... my thoughts, my ideas! Idk my take on them. Thanks for asking 🫡

[canmom]

Comics mini-Comints: Dungeon Meshi

reread dungeon meshi through to the end. still such a great manga. here are immediate thoughts - if I end up having time and energy I hope I can write something that goes deeper!

ironically i was only a few chapters from the end when I stopped keeping up, but I was struggling to remember all the characters and context, so reading it through in one go was definitely an ideal way to achieve maximum impact there.

ryoko kui does a very elegant job of handling a transition from 'silly antics' to 'big dramatic fantasy' while still keeping the central thematic throughline - eating and being eaten, belonging to an ecosystem, the significance of sacrificing others to achieve your own desires. a lot of setups pay off in a way that feels meticulously planned - and of course the crux of the final showdown revolves around characters attempting to eat each other, of course the big payoff is a huge feast that symbolically unites all the conflicting factions. it is maybe a bit too neat and happy for my taste, but it's undeniably tightly executed - it never loses sight of what it's about. especially compared to something like Frieren, it's an incredibly coherent serialisation, up there with e.g. Fullmetal Alchemist.

kui's art style deserves all kinds of praise - it feels effortlessly simple, but it clearly communicates all sorts of different shapes and body types and it's really fun to see her play around with remixing the different visual elements when she switches the races around. in general Laius's autistic monster loving ways clearly reflect kui's own deeply felt appreciation for all the ways people and animals live (accentuated further by all the extra sketches the scanlators tuck in). in a way you could kinda call it like Parts Unknown the fantasy manga.

the stakes of the final conflict are interesting - there is much to be said about the framing of 'desire' and its fulfilment, of this occult idea of 'the infinite'. lots you could put in relation to other manga, and also buddhism. (in particular I really want to develop a comparison to Made In Abyss, there are so many parallels, it just might be too spicy for tumblr lmao).

one thing I really like about it is how much its fantasy dungeon-exploring setting owes to D&D and other TTRPGs, rather than videogames. monster ecology has been a fascination of that game since the early days of Dragon magazine, and Kui sharply zeroes in on some of the intrinsic conflicts baked in to that fantasy milieu, notably the lifespan thing, while smartly avoiding the traps of 'evil races'. there's some really fun nods to the weirder monster manual entries. and in a story with so many characters and factions, it does a genuinely incredible job of furnishing everyone with understandable, reasonable motivations, conflicts drawn from their context just like the monsters are explained by their ecology.

and one thing that I particularly appreciate is like... how much it is able to simultaneously understand and sympathise with a character and also show us how and why they'd rub others the wrong way. it's impossible not to like our main group, they're all such charming dorks and the manga leads you along with all the crazy rpg party shit they do, but at the same time you definitely find yourself thinking 'guy's got a point' in the kabru chapters lmao. I'm projecting hard bc i don't really know a thing about ryōko kui but laius def feels like the sort of depiction of having an autism that you can only do if you've lived it.

but yeah, it's a fuzzy ending where it all turns out well. but what's the deeper thrust of it all? there's a funny moment where marcille is like 'maybe in the end our journey is about learning to accept death' and the grouchy old gnome guy completely laughs this off as naive, because death doesn't mean anything. and indeed their big plan pays off, and falin does indeed come back just fine. but still, through all of this it asks you to bite the bullet that being a living creature means eating to survive, at the cost of other creatures, with the other side being that one day you too will be eaten. in contrast to this honest way of being is the beguiling fantasy of infinity, where all your desires are immediately fulfilled - this is shown as a dangerous path of corruption that produces madness and manipulability. having limits and rubbing up against the wishes of others, or 'doing things you don't want to do' as izutsumi's arc puts it, becomes necessary for having some kind of definition as a subject. the thing that makes the demon concrete as an entity is a desire, or appetite, that can't immediately be fulfilled.

of course we can connect this to the idea of narrative conflict. a standard advice for putting together a plot is to ask what each character wants and why they can't get it. wanting something implies movement. and indeed over the course of this story, we see that while having too many desires fulfilled too readily leads to incoherence and callousness, equally a character who is left catatonic as their desires have been eaten by the demon must be reawakened to activity by finding a new desire.

it's kinda Buddhist innit. neither the opulence of the palace nor asceticism. desires are what tie you to the world. but mixed with ecology: what a creature does to find the energy to live is what defines its lifestyle, its form.

this is probably where I'd start talking about entropy gradients and shit if i wasn't typing this on a phone at 1:30am lmao.

but yeah - it's a powerful move to go from 'D&D monster recipe show sendup' to 'living with the inherently violent nature of being an organism fated to live in a finite sum game' and yet Dungeon Meshi makes it feel natural and convincing, while remaining tremendously charming and funny throughout. ryōko kui is definitely some kind of genius, and I can't wait to see what her next act is gonna be. it's all definitely making me appreciate the act of eating a lot more.

next story on my plate is probably The Flower That Bloomed Nowhere, which sounds like it will present a very gnarly thematic contrast.

[defectivevillain]

struck by your lightning, ch3

reader’s pronouns: he/him

summary: You decide to take advantage of the moment’s respite you’re given. “Okay. Hey, how are you?” You look up, only to find yourself staring at Kaminari Denki. The Kaminari Denki—the idol with over thirty million listeners and sold-out concerts across the world. You’re certain that you’re going to fumble your words several times in front of him. (You're a reporter working at the red carpet of a national award gala. You've convinced yourself that you're doing just fine. At least, you're doing fine until you interview Kaminari.)

here’s chapter one and chapter two [you’ll want to read these first, otherwise this won’t make much sense]

this is a chat-hybrid fic and the formatting was mostly made for ao3. it’s a lil wonky here, so here’s the ao3 version if you’d prefer to read that :)

since it's been a while, here's a refresh of what happened in ch1-2: The reader works at DoubleVision agency and is invited to interview artists at an award show. His interview and interaction with Kaminari quickly goes viral—both because of his flustered reaction at the end and the “Love ya”s exchanged at the end. The reader tries not to think too much of it, until he opens his phone to find a message from an unknown number who proves to be Kaminari himself. The two quickly grow to be friends through frequent text conversations. Kaminari reveals that he has your placard for the event and plans for the two of you to meet up together at the nearby coffee shop…

now, onto the story....

Tokyo Entertainment Fix | @tokentfix

Popstar Kaminari Denki Spotted with Reporter from Awards Gala at Coffee Shop! 

[ coffee1.jpg ] [ coffee2.jpg ] [ coffee3.jpg ]

89k comments | 486k retweets | 1.8m likes

____________

jj | @dendendenki

ARE Y’ALL SEEING THIS

409 comments | 3k retweets | 18.2k likes

i said what i said. | @ urfavescouldnever

In response to @dendendenki 

seeing what

5 comments | 21 retweets | 451 likes

jj | @dendendenki

In response to @ urfavescouldnever 

THIS [tokentfix.twt] [newsarticle.link]

61 comments | 1.3k retweets | 8k likes

i said what i said. | @ urfavescouldnever

In response to @dendendenki 

I’M SEEING IT NOW HOLY SHIT

4 comments | 808 retweets | 1.6k likes

_______

Direct Message 

You: have you seen…?

Kaminari Denki: the news article about us?

You: yeah

Kaminari Denki: ah yeah, i saw it

You: i’m sorry

Kaminari Denki: i’m sorry

Kaminari Denki: WHAT

You: i’m sorry

Kaminari Denki: no no no

Kaminari Denki: stop that immediately

You: y??

Kaminari Denki: bc it's not ur fault!!!

Kaminari Denki: if anything, i should be the one apologizing 

You: why??? you didn’t do anything

Kaminari Denki: NEITHER DID YOU

You: ah damn it i see what you did there

Kaminari Denki: damn right

Kaminari Denki: but srsly, i hope the article isn’t messing anything up for u

You: i was gonna say the same to you

Kaminari Denki: oh pls, this kind of shit happens to me all the time

Kaminari Denki: but seriously, are you doing ok?

You: yep all good

You: it’s just more funny than anything else

Kaminari Denki: is the thought of dating me really so bad :(

You: oh pls, that’s not what i meant

You: i just meant celebrity culture in general…  like they’re so obsessed with your relationship status and it’s kinda weird>??

Kaminari Denki: yeah… 

You: sigh

You: so glad i’m just a lowly reporter 🙏

Kaminari Denki: hey, don’t jinx it

Kaminari Denki: plus, haven’t you looked on twt recently

Kaminari Denki: fans are shipping us together

Kaminari Denki: pretty sure there are stan accounts dedicated to you now

Kaminari Denki: not that i would know

Kaminari Denki: or follow them

You: fr??

Kaminari Denki: fr fr

You: deadass?

Kaminari Denki: on god

You: i hate us

Kaminari Denki: same

__________

Thankfully, that article about Kaminari and you doesn’t actually change much. You go about business as usual, albeit with a strange sense of guilt prickling along your skin when your mind is unoccupied. You throw yourself into your work and try to bury the emotions, but they are never truly extinguished. 

Your conversations with Kaminari are far rarer now, especially as the both of you get even busier. Kaminari is working on releasing his next album and you’re pitching new stories and writing to old acquaintances for features. Even though you throw yourself into work, you still find your thoughts returning to Kaminari. Your relationship with him is currently undefined—your meeting the other day felt like a date, but neither of you acknowledged it. You would love to be more than friends with Kaminari, but you also know that someone as well-known as him doesn’t exactly have the freedom to pursue a relationship and a music career at the same time. Resigned, you slowly push away thoughts of Kaminari until you think you get a good handle on your emotions. 

Until everything you try to suppress comes roaring back.

___________

 Kaminari Denki | @kaminaridenki

24 hours. [STATIC.jpg]

203k comments | 1.2m retweets | 4m likes

____________

Kaminari Denki to Release New Album Tomorrow

Arts—Music

2 min ago ᐧ By Janet Drews

Kaminari Denki, award-winning musical artist and popular culture icon, recently announced the release of his new album on Twitter. The Tweet earned over four million likes and 200,000 comments. Listeners are clearly looking forward to the occasion, as #KaminariDenki, #STATIC, and #DenkiAlbum top the Twitter Trending page (#1, #2, and #4, respectively). 

Some fans speculate the new album will be an ode to the rumored relationship between Kaminari and the DoubleVision reporter who interviewed him at the award gala [interview.mp4]. The interaction between the singer and the reporter quickly went viral following live coverage of the event. Digital citizens across the platform searched for explanations for the exchange, and Kaminari fans such as user @heyheyh3y discussed their red-carpet conversation.  

stream lightning by kaminari! | @heyheyh3y okay but is it just me or was there some tension there…  [interview.jpg]: A screenshot of Kaminari standing next to you during the interview.   907 comments | 66k retweets | 256k likes

This album will be a bit different from his previously released music, Kaminari said to Vogue Japan mere days ago. The artist made no mention of a significant other who could bear influence on his new music, despite the fact that he was seen with the DoubleVision reporter at EspressoBeanz but a few days ago—a cafè conveniently located near both DoubleVision agency and UA Entertainment. However, other Kaminari fans, like users @electrstatic and @staticshockwave, weren’t convinced:

⚡⚡| @electrstatic y’all are making such a huge deal about this whole reporter business, as if the same thing hasn’t happened time and time again with literally anyone kaminari interacts with 31 comments | 23 retweets | 700 likes electric boogaloo  | @staticshockwave In response to @electrstatic  THANK YOU. like, when he first got Arata as a manager, everyone was going batshit crazy about how they were dating… and they weren’t. and the way anyone breathing in Kaminari’s direction is assumed to be dating him… it’s crazy 0 comments | 8 retweets | 32 likes

Either way, fans across the world are looking forward to the release of new music from Kaminari.  His new album, STATIC, will be released on Apple Music, Spotify, Soundcloud, and assorted digital platforms at 3 p.m. JST (approximately 10 a.m. UTC). 

__________

Direct Message

You: heyyy, how are you feeling

You: the album releases tmrw, right?

Kaminari Denki: very nervous 

Kaminari Denki: and yes, t minus 20 hrs

You: awesome!

You: and rly? why?

Kaminari Denki: well… i worked hard on it, and i want ppl to like it

You: okay 

You: will you be disappointed if your fans don’t like it?

Kaminari Denki: a little, yeah

You: but why do you write music? do you write it for them or for yourself? 

Kaminari Denki: 

You: sorry, that sounds patronizing…

Kaminari Denki: no, you’re right

Kaminari Denki: i think i needed to hear that

You: i mean, you clearly worked very hard on it. i’m sure everyone listening will recognize that.

Kaminari Denki: i hope so

You: they will 😠 and if they don’t, fuck em

Kaminari Denki: damn right

Kaminari Denki: thanks <3

You: ofc! <3

You: i have to go eat dinner, talk soon?

Kaminari Denki: yep,, enjoy your meal

You: tyyy haha

___________

Direct Message

Kaminari Denki: hypothetically speaking

Sero Brain Cells: ok hello to you too

Sero Brain Cells: also bitch do i look like a scientist

Kaminari Denki: hYPOTHETICALLY SPEAKING

Kaminari Denki: does a “<3” mean someone is hopelessly in love with me

Sero Brain Cells: jfc

Kaminari Denki: is that a yes

Sero Brain Cells: ur so fuckin whipped

Kaminari Denki: SHUT UP

Kaminari Denki: I TRUSTED YOU

Kaminari Denki: i came to you in my time of weakness

Kaminari Denki: and this is how you repay me

Sero Brain Cells: dude, you gotta tell him at some point

Kaminari Denki: ik…

Sero Brain Cells: and even if you don’t, he’ll probably figure it out soon

Kaminari Denki: wdym

Sero Brain Cells: ur new album. 

Kaminari Denki: what about it?

Sero Brain Cells: half of those songs are so clearly about him

Kaminari Denki: nahhhh no way i kept it hella ambiguous

Sero Brain Cells: ambiguous, huh

Kaminari Denki: shut up

Kaminari Denki: … do you really think he’ll notice

Sero Brain Cells: well, i’m not sure

Sero Brain Cells: you both seem a lil oblivious, so it may be fine

Kaminari Denki: hey 😭

Sero Brain Cells: all love

Sero Brain Cells: but also get ur shit together u raging homo (affectionate, non-derogatory)

Kaminari Denki: oh pls, as if you haven’t been pining for shoto for six business years

Sero Brain Cells: HEY

Sero Brain Cells: …HEY

Sero Brain Cells: HEY 💀

Sero Brain Cells: ik ur stressed rn so i’ll let that slide 🤨

Kaminari Denki: ur right, i’m so anxious

Kaminari Denki: sry for taking it out on u, bro 

Sero Brain Cells: it’s ok bro

Sero Brain Cells: wanna get ur ass kicked in mariokart?

Kaminari Denki: do i want to kick ur ass in mariokart? absolutely

Sero Brain Cells: we’ll see about that

Kaminari Denki: damn right we will

___________

Kaminari Denki | @kaminaridenki

fucking godly at mariokart [mariokart.jpg]

19k comments | 97k retweets | 347k likes

Sero | @serofucks

In response to @kaminaridenki 

oh fuck all the way off, you had steering assist on

3k comments | 45k retweets | 228k likes

@kamisimpsimp

In response to @serofucks 

OOOOP

47 comments | 430 retweets | 1.4k likes

surprised pikachu face | @kamipikakami

In response to @kamisimpsimp 

gagged and gooped

31 comments | 338 retweets | 2.3k likes

alex | @kaminarunaronari

In response to @kaminaridenki 

what really concerns me is that you main lakitu

2k comments | 134k retweets | 765k likes

stream lightning by kaminari! | @heyheyh3y

In response to @kaminaridenki 

here we are, anxiously awaiting the new album, and this mf is playing mariokart

21 comments | 208 retweets | 809 likes

@kamisimpsimp

In response to @heyheyh3y 

as one does!

0 comments | 46 retweets | 665 likes

___________

Direct Message 

You: heyyyy

You: it’s release dayyyyyy

Kaminari Denki: when you when you when you whennnnnnnnnnnnnnfdshfkdjs

You: :0

You: looking forward to it!

Kaminari Denki: :3

(Nine Hours Later) 

Direct Message 

You: congratulationsssss!!!!

You: i’ll try to find the time to listen to STATIC soon!!!

Kaminari Denki: thanks :)

___________

Kaminari stares down at his phone, watching as fans discuss the new album. He has the album on shuffle in the background as he tries to brainstorm some choreography. Kaminari has absolute faith in the talented choreographers that he works with—but he just feels like he needs to do something to combat the restless energy surging through him.  

The feedback on the album so far has been overwhelmingly positive, yet he’s still nervous—as if he’s still waiting for a reaction from someone. Shaking his head, he tries to focus on the choreography he’s creating. But that plan quickly backfires. Within moments, his phone buzzes—breaking him out of his thoughts. Kaminari freezes and immediately grabs it from his pocket, heart thudding rhythmically in his chest as he unlocks his phone and goes to his messages. There’s a series of texts from you:

You: ok, i have time to listen, now! You: gonna listen as i make dinner!!!

Kaminari sighs, trying to calm his racing heart. He doesn’t know what to say or how to say it. Taking a deep breath, he puts his phone back in his pocket and decides to practice some of the choreography for his other songs. Even amidst the music running through the space and the dance moves that seemed etched onto his very skin, Kaminari still can’t help but think of you. 

___________

Meanwhile, you’re just getting home from work. You hate to admit it, but you’ve been looking forward to listening to Kaminari’s new album for a bit now. It’s especially thrilling to think that you can discuss it with him afterward—hell, he even seems to be awaiting your feedback. The thought is exciting and nerve-wracking in equal measures. 

You decide to change out of your work clothes before starting dinner, so that you don’t have to worry about staining anything. Then, you grab your Bluetooth speaker and place it on the kitchen counter, before pulling up Kaminari’s newest album and tapping on the first song. Immediately, a beautiful, twisting melody reaches your ears and you swear you feel your shoulders begin to relax. You busy yourself with preparing dinner while his voice fills the space. 

Safe to say, the album is incredible. You really like each song you’ve listened to so far—and have found yourself saving each of them to various playlists. Even if you hadn’t spoken with Kaminari throughout the period he was working on the album, you would be able to tell that he put a lot of effort into it. As you expected, that effort shows through in each and every song.  

His songs are rather hard-hitting, emotionally speaking. The fifth song, traces of you , makes you freeze in place. You have to rewind to listen to one particular portion of the song again: 

…and I stand aside 

as you’re washed away  

with the ebbing tide 

I’m so afraid 

of falling out of love 

Sometimes I look up  

at the blinding black night 

and the stars seem to whisper  

your name in the air 

I feel a shiver roll down my spine 

I remember your hand in mine, 

and I’m just so afraid.  

You don’t know how long you stand at the kitchen counter, letting the lyrics slip into your ears and down your skin. This song is so raw and vulnerable. You feel the sudden urge to close your eyes. For a moment, you can almost trick yourself into thinking Kaminari is singing to you, that these lyrics are meant for you and you alone. It’s a foolish thought, but you can’t quite push it away. You feel your eyes burning with unshed tears as you try to picture Kaminari writing down these lyrics. What was he feeling, in those moments? Were his eyebrows furrowed in concentration? Were his hands stained from the still-drying ink of his pen? Was he tapping his foot along to an unheard, not-yet-created melody?  

Something blares loudly, tearing you from your reverie. You blink and look around the room, gasping when you realize you completely neglected the pan on the stove. The pan is smoking and you recognize that insufferable sound to be the fire alarm. You’re quick to turn off the burner. The fire isn’t extinguished. Panicking, you race to one of the kitchen cabinets to grab baking soda. Baking soda, quickly , your mind is practically yelling. You grab the baking soda and haphazardly spread it over the grease fire, relief coursing through you when you see the flames begin to die down. When the fire finally subsides, you look down at your attempt at dinner, only to find a charred pile. You shake your head in disbelief and clean up your mess, before grabbing your phone and skipping to the next song. 

You don’t make the mistake of attempting to make dinner as you listen to the rest of the album, which is a rather smart move, because the remaining songs are lyrical masterpieces. There isn’t a single song on the album that you don’t like. A small smile growing on your face, you open your messaging app. 

___________

Direct Message

You: i love the new album holy shit

Kaminari Denki: really?

You: yesssss omfg absolutely 

Kaminari Denki: akjdfkjfskdjfsdlkf

Kaminari Denki: which track is your favorite? for research purposes 

You: research purposes? lol

You: my favorite is definitely traces of you 

Kaminari Denki: ah, that’s one of my favorites, too!

Kaminari Denki: and lemme just say: i’m so happy you listened! it means the world to me, so thank you <3

You: no need to thank me—just doing my due diligence as a friend! besides, the new album is incredible!

You: and i promise i’m not just saying that to be nice,,, it’s clear you put a lot of effort into it. 

Kaminari Denki: ahhh stawp ur gonna make me all flustered xD

You: hahaha

You: i do have one critique, though

Kaminari Denki: ooooh ok i’m listening 👀

You: traces of you needs to come with a warning

Kaminari Denki: for what? shit how did i miss that

You: “warning: will distract you from cooking dinner and nearly burn your home down”

Kaminari Denki: wait

Kaminari Denki: you did notttttt 💀

You: I DID

You: i was so distracted i forgot i was making dinner

Kaminari Denki: omfgggg that’s insane

Kaminari Denki: i’ve heard a lot of things about my music, but never that it almost burned a house down and ruined dinner 😭

You: lmfaooo 

Kaminari Denki: i’m so sorry 😭😭

You: it’s not your fault, holy shit

You: don’t feel guilty!!!! if it makes you feel better, it was completely worth it

Kaminari Denki: hmph 

You: i wasn’t rly that hungry anyways

Kaminari Denki: hm hm hm hm hmmmmmm

You: whatttt

Kaminari Denki: nothing i gtg

Kaminari Denki is offline. 

You: o….kay? …bye?

___________

You exit out of your messaging app and start rummaging through your pantry for something to eat. Nothing sounds very good right now. You don’t have much food left, either—you’re in desperate need of a trip to the grocery store. You’re sure you can make time to go tomorrow, but as for right now… you’re stuck making do with what you have. Truthfully, you’re tempted to order something—but it’s already getting late and you don’t want to wait even longer for a meal when you’re already hungry. 

You walk out into your living room and flop onto the couch, trying to distract yourself from the hunger gnawing at your stomach. Admittedly, your abrupt conversation with Kaminari is weighing heavily on your mind too. You eventually scroll through YouTube mindlessly, if only to keep yourself distracted. You’re not sure how long you sit there before there’s a sudden ringing sound. You frown, wondering if you’re hearing things. 

The sound occurs again, and you realize that someone must be ringing your doorbell. Squinting in confusion, you head to your front door and peek through the peephole—surprised to find a familiar blond singer standing on your porch. You quickly unlock your front door and swing it open. “Kaminari?” You ask, convinced you’re seeing things. You hadn’t made plans to hang out today, and you assumed that your conversation died off because he was busy. 

“Hey,” Kaminari smiles. He’s wearing a sweatshirt and jeans with a pair of colorful sneakers. His bangs are clipped back and his hair is almost glowing in the dim light of your porch. There’s a sheepish smile on his face that is endlessly endearing. “I heard you missed dinner.” He smiles, holding up a few bags of takeout from a restaurant the two of you had spoken about before. 

“You didn’t have to do that,” you say quickly, hoping that you didn’t make him feel as if he had to provide you with dinner. It wasn’t his fault you were distracted. 

“I wanted to,” he says with a smile, dispelling your doubts. “I think I remember your order, but…” He trails off, averting his eyes with an embarrassed expression. “I got a few different things, just in case.”

“I could kiss you,” you breathe relievedly, unaware of the flush that adorns Kaminari’s cheeks as he processes that remark. You motion for him to come in, before locking the front door and showing him to the dining room. You leave him to unbag the food, while you grab plates and utensils. “Do you want anything to drink?” You ask from the kitchen.

“What do you have?” Kaminari asks casually. 

“Water, soda, sparkling water…” You trail off, looking through your fridge for anything else you may have laying around. 

“Water’s fine,” he smiles. You roll your eyes and grab another glass, filling up waters for you both before returning to the table. Kaminari wasn’t kidding when he said he bought a few different things—as it’s all laid out on your table, it looks as if he bought half the menu. You return to the kitchen and grab the plates and utensils you gathered earlier, before heading back. Unsurprisingly, the pile of food on the table doesn’t get any smaller. 

“This is a lot of food,” you remark cautiously. Realistically speaking, there’s no way you’ll be able to finish all of this, and you feel slightly guilty. 

“Oh, yeah,” Kaminari nods, “I figured we would have enough for leftovers, and stuff.” You nod in agreement, before busying yourself with making a plate. 

“So,” you say, once the two of you are settled in and have begun eating. You didn’t realize just how hungry you were until you took a bite of the food. There’s an inexplicable tension hovering over the air, and you’re unsure if you’re imagining it or not. “How are you feeling?”

“Good,” Kaminari responds with a nod. “Really good,” 

“Good!” You smile, taking another bite. “Are you topping the charts already?”

He smiles bashfully, poking at his food with a fork. “I think so… yeah.” He’s so humble, and you can’t help but think it’s rather admirable. 

“That’s so cool,” you remark, “I’m so happy for you.” 

“Thanks, I’m happy, too.” He smiles briefly, before looking back down at his food. The happiness in his expression almost seems to flicker for a moment, and the grin on his lips suddenly looks strained. You frown. At first, you want to put that sight down to your imagination; but when the silence stretches on for a while and he doesn’t make a move to continue speaking, you decide to acknowledge it. 

“Are you sure?” You blurt out, before you can contemplate the consequences of speaking so freely. Kaminari looks at you in confusion and you grimace. “Sorry. It’s just- You seem a little… off, I guess.”

“I’m good,” he reassures you with a small nod. The gesture is not very convincing. 

“Okay,” you say, not wanting to push him further. If there’s something he doesn’t want to talk about, you’re not going to force it out of him. After a few moments, your conversation returns to normal. You still have a lingering suspicion that there’s something weighing on his mind, but you decide to forget about it. 

Overall, your dinner is pleasant. You get the chance to ask Kaminari a few questions about the album, and you really enjoy seeing his eyes sparkle as he goes into in-depth explanations of the meanings behind his songs. It feels like you’re seeing a side of him that very few people get to see—but you don’t want to flatter yourself. 

Kaminari offers to help you with the dishes when you’re both finished eating, but you quickly refuse and promise him you’ll finish them quickly. You run water over the dishes before placing them in the dishwasher, promising yourself to run it later that night. When you return to the table, you’re surprised to find Kaminari staring ahead with a troubled expression on his face. His hands are clasped on the table and his lips are pulled in a thin line. 

Before you can even begin to ask, he’s filling the silence. “You were right,” Kaminari admits. He sounds a little strange—almost as if he’s nervous. You stare at him expectantly. “There is something bothering me.”

The tortured expression on his face is a bit worrying. “Well, you don’t have to talk about it if you don’t want to,” You feel the need to remind him. While you’re concerned about what could be distressing him, you know that sometimes, it’s too painful to talk about those types of things. 

But Kaminari surprises you with his response. “I want to,” he reassures you. You watch as he pushes himself to his feet and stares down at the table, running a finger along the wood. “I’ve just… been trying to figure out how to say it.” 

“Take your time,” you say. “I’m not in a rush.” Kaminari nods appreciatively. 

You’re not sure what you’re expecting to hear, in all honesty. But what he says next feels entirely unreal. “When I first met you, I was attracted to you,” Kaminari chokes out, looking at the ceiling as if nervous to meet your eyes. “I sort of expected it to fizzle, because… well, I didn’t know you all that well. But once we started talking more, I realized that my feelings weren’t going away. While I just knew you as the alluring reporter before, I now knew you as this… this incredible person.” You stare at him in shocked silence. 

“You’re so… You’re kind, smart, and passionate. You have a wicked sense of humor and I always look forward to hearing from you. I…

“I’m not sure how familiar you are with me and my career, but… Truthfully, I hit a bit of a rough spot. My last album was a few years ago and I was convinced that I wouldn’t be able to write anything new. But then I met you, and got to know you, and all of a sudden, I was writing all the time. 

“Suddenly, I had an entire album—filled with songs that I wrote while thinking about you. And I didn’t know what to do. I had already tried to bury my feelings for you, and it clearly hadn’t worked at all. I assumed you didn’t feel the same as I did. And I’m still not sure, of course.

“But when you sent those messages earlier… I felt something snap in me. It was like, one moment I was staring down at my phone, and the next, I was walking into that restaurant you were talking about.

“And tonight, I’ve been trying to keep it together… But it’s been nearly fucking impossible. I see you across the table and I can’t help but think that this is how I want to spend the rest of my life—sneaking glances at you, and hearing about your day at work…

“Not to mention, the whole Sero thing… It was stupid. But when you said you liked his music, my heart just dropped. I felt like… I don’t know. I felt like I lost you. Even though you weren’t mine to lose.” 

“Anyway,” Kaminari says, shaking his head before meeting your eyes. He looks simultaneously more relieved and more nervous than before. “I just had to get that out. And now we can pretend I never said anything.” He shakes his head and fiddles with the strings of his hoodie. 

You’re still reeling from everything he just said, but you’re quick to dismiss his assumptions. “What?” You exclaim. “No, Kaminari, I have feelings for you too,” you say. He stares at you with wide eyes. “It’s been so fun getting to know you. You’re just… you’re so bright and energetic, passionate, and good-hearted… I was so nervous when I first met you, because it was my first time ever being on a red carpet… but you made me feel more confident, just by being yourself.”

“And when I got distracted listening to your music earlier… It was because I was thinking of you, and thinking that, somehow, you could be singing just to me. That you could have written that song… just for me. And I know it’s stupid…”

“It’s not stupid,” Kaminari interjects, before you can spiral into further self-deprecation. “I just told you, I was thinking of you when I wrote them. All of them.” The lyrics flicker before your eyes at rapid speed, as you remember all the words that felt too vulnerable to ever be yours. You think about how you felt as you were cooking dinner—that tight feeling in your chest as you pretended that everything was fine, as you pretended that you were okay with the idea of Kaminari writing those songs while thinking of someone else. Before you can contemplate your next move, you’re surging forward—and Kaminari is too. Your hands cradle his cheeks as you kiss him, and he tugs you impossibly closer with his hands on your waist. His touch sends pleasant shivers down your spine. 

“I guess the fans were right, huh,” you remark with amusement once you break apart. 

“There’s a first time for everything,” Kaminari says, his eyes gleaming. He takes a deep breath, his hands still latched on your waist (as if he doesn’t want to let you go). Indecision draws his lips together into a flat line. “Are you sure you want to do this? Being in a relationship with me… It’s going to be different. I- I can’t pretend that I have any privacy whatsoever, or a super accommodating schedule, or-”

“Of course I want to do this,” you immediately say, before he can continue. “More than anything.” 

Kaminari’s hands migrate up your shoulders and towards the nape of your neck. He leans closer until your foreheads are touching. “I’m just so afraid.” He whispers, so quietly that you nearly convince yourself you didn’t hear it. (The stars seem to whisper your name in the air… I feel a shiver roll down my spine, I remember your hand in mine, and I’m just so afraid). You pull him into a hug.  

“Me too,” you admit in a breath against his shoulder. Kaminari mutters something into your shoulder, but it’s incomprehensible. “Hey, if we can get five and a half million people to watch us stumble through an interview, I think we can do this.” The singer huffs a laugh and pulls back, his hand rising to your cheek and his thumb running across your skin. There’s a smile on his face—one of unmistakable fondness and affection. You lean forward to break the distance between you once more, a euphoric feeling settling in your chest and a smile growing on your face.

endnotes:

i really snuck Seroroki in there, mhwhahaha.

this took so fuckin long to format on here (I had to format it AGAIN despite already devoting time to doing that on ao3), pls show some love if you enjoy it... i'm begging

thanks for reading! <3

check out my other works, sorted by fandom.

general taglist: @its-ares @excusemeasibangmyheadonawall @kingkoku @the-ultimate-librarian @gayaristocrat anddd @alex12ander @7heehee7 @the-lurking-await-you since y'all commented on part two

[brattyfork]

matt nsfw alphabet

*these are about sex! if that makes you uncomfy, don’t read it!*

A = Aftercare (what they’re like after sex)

-the whole nine yards, a bath, drink, snacks, cuddles, your fav tv show, literally anything that will make you more comfortable he’ll do + sex debrief! talk abt what you liked, what you didn’t, what went “wrong”, what was funny+naked cuddles ofc.

B = Body part (their favorite body part of theirs and also their partner’s)

-he loves your thighs, loves squeezing them, having them wrapped around his head, leaving hickies on them. also your stomach! he loves squishy.

he likes his hands, likes how big they are compared to yours, loves wearing rings bc he knows it drives you crazy.

C = Cum (anything to do with cum, basically)

-loves cumming inside you (in a condom to avoid a mess lol) but also loves cumming on your tummy!!

D = Dirty secret (pretty self explanatory, a dirty secret of theirs)

-he’ll never admit it but he loves when you lick him, his neck, his stomach, literally anywhere. he also really likes amateur porn, so much so that you guys made your own so he can watch that instead.

E = Experience (how experienced are they? do they know what they’re doing?)

-not super experienced, only has one or two bodies but he’s always asked you how to do stuff or what he can do to make you feel better so he’s much better than he used to be.

F = Favorite position (this goes without saying)

-sucker for missionary, wants to be able to kiss you and watch the faces you make. also loves when you ride him, watching you use his cock to get off.

G = Goofy (are they more serious in the moment? are they humorous? etc.)

-he tries to be serious but sometimes things just aren’t going right and you gotta laugh abt it. make sure he knows you’re not laughing AT him tho, it’ll ruin the mood entirely.

H = Hair (how well groomed are they? does the carpet match the drapes? etc.)

-usually just trims, doesnt wanna be bare but also doesn’t want it too long and def doesn’t want you getting pubes in your teeth lmao.

I = Intimacy (how are they during the moment? the romantic aspect)

-always telling you how much he loves you during, wants to make it as special as possible so you know you’re not just a quick fuck.

J = Jack off (masturbation headcanon)

-wants you to talk him through it over the phone, tell him how good he’s being and give him permission to cum eventually.

K = Kink (one or more of their kinks)

-unpopular opinion! i think this man likes your feet!! not super into foot jobs he just thinks your feet are cute. loves being in control but will never turn down the opportunity to be dominated. +basic shit like praise and degradation, choking to an extent. also loves edging and overstimulating you.

L = Location (favorite places to do the do)

-prefers to fuck in your bed so you have privacy, also likes the couch or car sometimes and very occasionally, wants to bend you over a table.

M = Motivation (what turns them on, gets them going)

-just being close to you can get him worked up. it drives him crazy when you wear shorts or a skirt that hug your thighs so perfectly.

N = No (something they wouldn’t do, turn offs)

-up for mostly anything unless it’s obviously gross, but gets nervous with any kind of impact play because he does not want to hurt you. also doesn’t love the idea of anal, kinda grosses him out.

O = Oral (preference in giving or receiving, skill, etc.)

-matt the munch! this man loves eating pussy and he’s phenomenal at it. he likes when you suck him off but he won’t ask. he wants you to want to do it if that makes sense.

P = Pace (are they fast and rough? slow and sensual? etc.)

-completely depends on how he’s feeling. if he’s super worked up, you won’t be able to walk the next day but sometimes he loves soft slow morning sex. either way the pace is always perfect and exactly what you both need.

Q = Quickie (their opinions on quickies, how often, etc.)

-doesn’t love quickies, he wants to be able to take his time but sometimes if you haven’t fucked in a while and you have the opportunity for a quickie, he’ll take it

R = Risk (are they game to experiment? do they take risks? etc.)

-up for trying (almost) anything once, he just gets nervous that he’ll hurt you or not do it right and embarrass himself.

S = Stamina (how many rounds can they go for? how long do they last?)

-i think on a good night he could go 2-3 rounds but most of the time only 1, maybe 2. he doesn’t finish super fast unless it’s been awhile but he probably won’t last more than 20 min of straight fucking.

T = Toys (do they own toys? do they use them? on a partner or themselves?)

-doesn’t love toys, doesn’t have any for himself, not a fan of using dildos on you, he’d rather just fuck you. does like vibrators tho, and shit like handcuffs or restraints, perfect for overstimulation.

U = Unfair (how much they like to tease)

-he tries to tease but it never lasts long. he can’t deny you when you make your pretty noises or beg him. also can’t resist you so it’s hard to tease lol.

V = Volume (how loud they are, what sounds they make, etc.)

-usually grunting and groaning all up in your ear. sometimes a whine or a whimper comes through and he gets all embarrassed, which is super hot.

W = Wild card (a random headcanon for the character)

-loves when you ask him what bra/panties you should wear (his fav is a sparkly dark blue set)

X = X-ray (let’s see what’s going on under those clothes)

-we’ve all seen his sleeper build. he’s not super muscular but he’s also not a twig, he’s strong and can throw you around. his dick isn’t super long, which doesn’t matter bc he knows how to use it, it’s proportional in length and width. his dick is as pretty as a cock can be. you KNOW this man has a cute butt and i imagine him having little lower back dimples🥺

Y = Yearning (how high is their sex drive?)

-he’s not a complete horn dog, he can turn it off and just have sweet romantic moments with no thought of sex, but he also finds you irresistible so it’s hard. he doesn’t want you to think he’s a horny man that can’t control himself.

Z = Zzz (how quickly they fall asleep afterwards)

-he gets pretty sleepy after!! once he gets you all settled and makes sure your comfortable, he’s out like a light.

a/n: hi this was so fun, i’m also working on one for chris and i have a sfw template for both of them as well :) i promise i will post more soon lol, i been busy <3

[toxictigertonic]

HIII i absolutely adore your outlast trials headcanons, they're so silly and accurate .. if u don't mind, could you maybe do one of the prime assets going to the movie theater? that'd be so funny

Took a little break to give my brain more time to soak in the outlast bathtub, but I'm back with more silly.

COYLE

- He wouldn't take his sunglasses off for the movie I'm saying this right now. It could be a 3D movie and he'd just put the glasses over top of his own.

- Kinda guy to get a hotdog at the movies instead of just popcorn. Then he complains about the price to the underage cashier.

- He likes to watch cop and action movies, imagines himself being the protagonist through the whole movie. He wishes he was that cool.

- Leaves popcorn on the floor and his empty cup in the cup holder because "it's their job to clean it up".

- Would try to steal snacks that Gooseberry brought in. She was gonna share them anyway but if he's gonna be like that he can starve.

- Shushes anybody who even breathes too loud when the movie is going. He is Locked In and if you distract him he's going to kick your ass.

- Due to being this locked in, he will hold his piss for however long the movie is. He's not missing a second of this, he'll piss himself if he has to.

- Does not care what seat he actually bought, he's gonna sit where he likes and you're gonna deal with it. Dick.

- Would try to smoke a cigarette inside of the theater and have to be escorted out. Would not go quietly.

- Does not stay to see if there's anything after the credits, misses out every time. It's not that he doesn't know, he doesn't believe that there's actually anything to see.

MOTHER GOOSEBERRY

- Brings a purse full of snacks with her. She is unwilling to spend 20 dollars on a little bit of candy. Still gets popcorn though, nobody can resist movie theater popcorn.

- Futterman wants to watch gorey horror movies while she wants to watch romcoms or just comedies in general.

- Futterman will complain through the whole movie if he's forced to watch a romcom. And he's loud about it too, the other movie goers would complain, but... that goose is scary.

- If he got his wish and they're watching a horror movie, he's cheering when characters die. Fuck the protagonists he's here for BLOOD.

- Futterman also complains about her snack choices. Candy? SUGAR? Think of the cavities, Phyllis!!

- She doesn't talk during movies but she is the one softly gasping whenever something like a plot twist happens.

- Futterman is face down in the popcorn bucket just munching away. He's gonna need a bath (read: get dunked in the sink) when they get home.

- Futterman would crack shitty jokes during quiet parts. Don't laugh it'll only encourage him to do it again.

- Phyllis is also a "hold it until the movie is over" kinda person but only because Futterman throws a fit if he misses out on parts. That's if they're watching a horror movie, if it's a romcom he's begging her to leave lol.

- Refills her popcorn before she leaves and brings it home with her.

FRANCO

- He actually can't eat popcorn bc the kernels get stuck in his teeth and it's uncomfortable :(

- Instead of eating popcorn, he's scarfing down candy. He strikes me as a gummy kind of guy.

- Gooseberry is actively rushing him past the snacks and candy bc he WILL try to buy 8 different kinds of candy and end up spending 60 dollars. He has the money but he does NOT need to experience a sugar rush halfway through a movie.

- He'd also go for horror movies, but also mafia/mob movies. Would shout at the screen about inaccuracies.

- Out of all of the assets, he's the one talking during the movie. He has a hard time sitting still and he's not completely paying attention and he wants Gooseberry to tell him what he missed. Coyle is shushing him the whole time.

- Despite being the one that keeps yapping, he'll kick the back of someone else's seat if he thinks they're talking too loud.

- Also leaves a mess of candy wrappers and spilled drinks, just like Coyle. He just doesn't care tbh.

- Gets up 9 separate times to use the bathroom, has to step in front of Coyle each time to get out of the row. They're gonna kill each other after the movie.

- If somebody else tries to step over his legs to get out of the row, he'd trip them. The menace.

- Gooseberry is clapping her hand over his eyes if there's any nudity and he is FIGHTING to move her hand away. Let him see!!

I would watch a movie with Phyllis and only Phyllis everyone else can wait in the car (sorry Franco)

[onemoreattempt]

If elves had texting/social media hcs:

Sophie: Kinda went over this here. horrible about getting back to ppl. Will accidentally leave you on read. Thinks she responded but didn’t. Her social media notifications are through the roof. If you need her urgently, you should probably just call. Very occasional posts. She’s doing her best.

Dex: Usually good at responding to messages, depending on how busy he is and if he’s around the triplets. Fast typist/texter. One of the few helpful ppl on Reddit.

Fitz: fast responder, usually no typos. Rarely uses shortened words or acronyms

Biana: I feel like Biana would cringe internally at misused homonyms/grammar errors, but she’d be nice about it. She types with pretty good grammar, other than the obvious texting things like acronyms, initialisms, and other word shortening things. If the elves typed in English, she’d never use the wrong ‘your’ or ‘there’ and she’s a firm believer in the Oxford comma. She’d also be a Pinterest/Instagram girlie.

Marella: types in all lowercase. knows about everything that’s happening anywhere. has all the social media. Occasionally trolls flat earthers claiming that the earth is actually shaped like a Klein bottle.

Keefe: gif city. Silliest Instagram ever. Fs blurry selfies and pictures of things him with things Sophie brought him from the forbidden cities. Yt haver. Might troll human politicians on twitter without knowing what he’s talking about. Definitely gets in on trolling the flat earthers. Claims the earth is shaped like Schrödinger’s cat (or Uranus, depending on the day).

Maruca: Probably on tiktok. Terrifying to text with if you have any kind of social anxiety and you are not close friends. Very direct texting style. Unnecessarily ends things with periods, and is a slow texter. It reads as pissed off until you get to know her. She’s an absolute riot in friend group chats. Like super funny.

Stina: If a message reads as pissed off it’s bc she is❤️ Absolutely bounces off Maruca in the gc. Stina = a voice memo person?? I also feel like yt and tiktok are her main social media. She doesn’t post on yt, but she does post on TikTok showing the work she does with unicorns. Definitely puts cuter moments on Instagram too. She and Maruca ft while going through their hair care routines.

Linh: I don’t necessarily think she would, but she has the potential to make one of the most aesthetically pleasing Instagram accounts (Linhstagram, if you will). Idk I feel like Linh would be into hiking and posting photos of that, plus her and Tam, or her and Marella. But, honestly, she probably just posts photos of her mercat😭 She also has the vibes of using the little press and hold mini responses a lot (like ❤️👍❓mostly until Tam goes off and Rayni shows up)

Tam: I feel like Tam is a bad or at least scarce texter. Maybe a gc ghost too. Everyone is surprised and excited when he responds in the gc bc he hasn’t done so in 4 months. Dude has no social media. Really only has his phone to communicate with Linh

Jensi: so much love for him, but he definitely has fast typing, lots of typos vibes. Early on in the series, he was very excitable, and the audiobook narrator makes him talk fast, so that makes me think he’d probably speed type his texts and send them without checking for typos first. Gets back to you in a snap🫰. Probably sends a lot of messages in succession when telling a story. May send videos explaining things as well, or voice memos that get off topic very fast.

[sukunasweetheart]

//just me venting about sukuna haters sorry

Not me seeing so much discourse about whether sukuna is a well written villain or not... he essentially has no backstory shown as of yet and we barely know anything about him but he is still one of the most naturally interesting and compelling characters in the whole damn series bro 💀 buckle up bc its about to get lengthy (im just glazing sukuna in this post ngl so 🧎‍♀️)

so many whiny ass mfs are weeping about how he "doesn't have any personal goals or a proper reason to be a villain" when that is the whole point???? He lives on his own desires and satisfactions and does whatever he wants to, because he is capable enough to do that. Mfs want "real villains" but cant even handle sukuna 💀 ive seen too many shit ass threads and poorly articulated "critiques" on his character that dont make any valid points. If you can't even separate your personal dislike of a character from your analysis of their writing, dont even bother posting that shit please 😭😭😭 the fact that we haven't even gotten any information about his background yet and people are jumping the gun about him being "poorly written" is already saying a lot 🤨

The fact that yall are so bitter and angry about him that you can write 500+ words about how oh-so-terrible of a villain he is kinda proves that he's doing his job well tbh 💁‍♀️

What also bothers me to no END is how people compare him with villains of other series, who had compelling sob stories that made people empathise with them. Thats nice and all but why should all villains have grand ideals and be subject to feelings of empathy/sympathy from their audience?

Part of what makes sukuna so interesting is how he's not tied down by morals, rules or long term goals in life. He doesn't limit himself, which is what makes him an unpredictable character. He's completely left behind what it means to be human in many ways, and he's clearly not a character written to be empathised with. He is very purposefully inhumane and distant from everyone else, and that feeling transcends from within the series to real life as well. There is a clear lack of understanding bc most of us can't comprehend what its like to just live without being goal-oriented.

Sukuna is a true anomaly in the sense that he doesnt really fit in any kind of box within the series. He's born from man, but its clear that he separates himself from humans (and nobody else considers him human, either). He's not a cursed spirit. He hovers between life and death. The narrator referred to him as the honoured one, whilst angel referred to him as the disgraced one.

These little contradictions in his character make him all the more complicated and interesting to think about. And even recently, he's been shown to waver a little bit momentarily in the manga, questioning his own irritation at yuuji. He's capable of self reflection, and though sukuna does whatever he wants for the most part, he doesn't blindly go into things without some thought first, he's a constant thinker and analyser, and an intelligent one at that.

And honestly, he is always such a joy to watch and read, his personality is so flavourful, and the way he carries himself is very attractive. He's not afraid to get messy or of getting hurt, theres so much chaos in the way he does things and yet he also has a huge element of gracefulness to him, which shines through the poetic way he speaks. Its undeniable that sukuna simply oozes charisma...

And this isnt talked about enough but this man is genuinely so effortlessly funny (in a kind of sinister way i guess?) Like yes he is an old ass man having real beef with one FIFTEEN YEAR OLD for very little reason, he accidentally healed yuujis arm and somehow expected him to be grateful for it despite how he literally ripped his heart out afterwards, then he proceeded to sit on him after kicking him down likeeee 😭 what kind of behaviour is this sir

His facial expressions at yorozus yapping 💀 THE WAY HE COMPARED YUUJIS FACE OF DESPAIR TO THE HARIMA STATUE 😭😭😭💀😭💀💀😭 omg that was so foul but i was fucking losing it ngl

How he randomly compared gojo to a fish and started talking abt his scales... thats a very unique and descriptive comparison, isnt it? Even in the recent leaks, he was 100% ready and squaring up to a literal child talking abt "youre starting to get annoying" LIKE HELPPP 😭 HE FR SAID "fuck them kids and fuck you too"

I saw someone saying that sukuna has no passion, like are we talking about the same character....? This man is a literal jujutsu NERD 💀💀 he truly recognises talented sorcerers and the only time hes seen to be having genuine fun is when hes fighting a mf... is that not passion? This is literally sukuna when it comes to jujutsu: 🤓

Anyway im done here now, im pretty sure i missed a lot of things i couldve talked about as well but ive done enough yapping