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marcsburnerphone · 12 days ago

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And they were roommates

(Captain John price x F!reader)

Summary: the captain wants somewhere more homely to settle down and when an offer like yours comes alight on Zillow he must take up on it.

Warnings: separation, John being John.

part 1 - part 2 - part 3 - part 4 - part 5 - part 6- part 7 - part 8 - Part 9 - part 10 - part 11 - part 12 - part 13 - part 14

--------------------------------------------------------------

“Oh my god i’ve missed you!” your sister says as she gets into your car at the train station and although a piece of home has left it also feels like a piece has come home.

“Thankyou for coming.” you smile pulling her into an uncomfortable hug over the center counsel.

“Coffee and a good movie that perhaps includes phone time?” she says as you pull away.

“Good god you mastermind.” you two laugh while backing out of the busy parking lot.

“So tell me everything, like what the hell this is?” she asks while grabbing the photo strip of you and john you keep on your dash.

“That day we went to the winery and they have a really popular black and white photo booth.” She smiles at the way your eyes light up when speaking about him.

“You complement each other well.”

“Thank you, you’d love him, maybe when he gets back you could meet him.” The suggestion isn't one you'd ever see yourself making again after your last embarrassment of a boyfriend.

“Of course.” she says with a soft smile.

—-----------------------

“Do you think she’s okay?” John asks Simon who sits next to him on the foreign base.

“I do.”

“I wish I could call her already, just to be sure and shake this feeling.” He was told calls weren't permitted until clearance that the location they’re at is secured.

“Captain, she can handle herself, she's going to be fine and if this goes to plan we’ll be back in no time.” John just sighs, his breath making a cloud into the cold air. By no time Simon means a month, a whole thirty days without you, he might just die from heartbreak.

“You think you'll marry her?” Simon has always been one for deep conversation but it’s always random and spontaneous.

“Jesus son it hasn't even been seven months.” John says with an awkward laugh knowing he has an answer to the question.

“That's not what I asked the captain.” Simon replies.

“I'd be lucky to, I'd give everything to make that woman my wife, it’s just too soon, I don’t want to scare her off.” he says with a hopeless sigh.

“Time is an illusion, captain, don't wait forever.”

“What are you, A fucking poet?”

“Yeah.” They both laugh as Simon opens a pack of cigarettes offering one to John and grabs one from the pack for himself.

“Like I said if I'm lucky.”

“I think the perfect woman falling into your hands proves you're as lucky as it gets, i mean look at those idiots.”he says gesturing towards johnny and gaz who arm wrestle on a wobbly table.

“You're right.”

—----------------

The days have been stretched long, you think to yourself. It was good though, the distractions of shopping and hanging with your sister was nice and relieving but now it's four in the morning and she's fast asleep beside you and your eyes won't even shut for more than five minutes before the anxiety becomes too much.

It's been a long time since you’ve had a night like this and you don't wish to have many more but while johns away you most likely will.

You get out of bed quietly and head to his room to grab a shirt of his, anything to feel closer. Walking in you realize you and john are very rarely in here and dust collects on the clothing drawer you open.

“I've missed these.” you say pulling your favorite pair of undies from the bottom of his pajama shirt drawer wondering when he could've gotten them then it hits you, these are from the night of your first date, you laugh quietly before putting them back.

You pull the shirt over your head right then and there, discarding the one you had on before, leaving it somewhere on John's floor before heading back to bed.

“Where'd you go?” your sister mumbles, scaring the life out of you.

“John's room real quick sorry for waking you.” you reply in a whisper.

“Yeah I thought a man got into bed with me.” you figure you've become a little blind to how strong his cologne can be and apologize.

“Night.” you say before sliding under the duvet.

—-------------

“That was close too close, almost got caught.” John says very sternly to his task force who just returned from their first outing in this foreign country.

“But we didn't.” gaz says, and it's true was it close yes but there've been many other occasions just like it.

“But we were close!” The captain's booming voice makes them all fall silent.

“Next time I say to pull away you listen, do you understand, let me expect more from you.” he pointed at simon.

“Understood.” he says with a nod.

“I'll see you all in the morning.” the captain says before walking away and into his tent. The boys all spare eachother side glances before Johnny starts.

“He needs to get laid immediately.”

“He just has something to live for now I think and it's scaring him.” the ghost replies and it's troubling him, because although he understands his captain has to get his emotions under control before this mission blows up in their faces.

“Go talk to him Lt.” Gaz says pointing towards where the silhouette of John is visible through the tarp of his tent. Simon gets up without another word walking to the tent asking if he could open it.

“What do you want?” John says to him, still agitated.

“Captain i understand your emotions are high right now you miss her and you're not allowed to call yet but understand we are soldier and as a team we understand each other-”

“I'm captain and I'm glad you understand each other but it's my job to understand the situation.”

“You're trying to understand the situation here and at home though, and it's going to get us killed.” Simon says before leaving. John realizes then he has had his mind in two places and he can't afford that. Swallowing his pride he approaches the team who's still sitting where he left them.

“I apologize for my outburst, let's reread some files and figure out an action plan for tomorrow.”

—-------------

It's been nearly a week and not a sound from John, you're worried sick and there's nothing anyone can do about it. Your sister has a life to return to and you'll be alone with these thoughts for however long.

“Alright babe till next time.” she says hopping out of your car back at the same spot you picked her up from. You get out to help her get her extra bags that she acquired from shopping.

“I love you, call me when you get home.” you say giving her a big hug trying not to cry.

“Will do, love you.” you watch her board before leaving. You're back home before you know it, getting back basically on autopilot.. You decide to call it a night at six, the emotional baggage of the day and the possibility of going another day without speaking to John is enough to get you to sleep heavily.

And sure enough not only another day passes with no contact but another week goes by.

—------------

“Good job out there today, that was beyond successful.” John says, patting everyone on the back as they all file back into their temporary base.

“Hey captain, have you spoken to the little lass?” he was cleared his fifth day here to call home but simply hasn't.

“No I haven't.”

“Why not?” it takes soap by surprise, the captain went from being worried sick about you to not even mentioning your name.

“It's a distraction I can't handle right now.” Simon's ears pick up on this and he just shakes his head in disappointment, that man only ever hears what he wants to.

“Okay, she probably misses you though.” soap continues.

“Don't johnny.” the captain demands sternly leaving him to just walk away.

John misses you he does, so much so it makes him sick but he can't afford to think about you more than a little before it consumes his thoughts, what're you doing?Where are you?How are you?It's all too much.

He stares at the phone he was issued long enough to the point where he picks it up and dials your number and of course you answer first ring.

“John, good god hon i've missed you.” he doesn't say anything just listens to your voice fill his ears.

“John hello you there.” he stays silent trying to hold in this rush of sadness he hadn't expected.

“Johnnnnnn hello, i think your connection is bad or maybe it's mine.” he feels guilty for doing this to you, just like he gets the comfort of hearing you again you deserve that too but he just can't bring himself to speak, so he hangs up and sets the phone down leaving his tent to drown himself in work and whatever else there is to do.

—------------

The confusion and uncertainty that followed with the click of the phone was immense but there were no tears left to cry by now. You've just accepted the fact that he couldn't talk right now reminding yourself that you knew what you were getting into when he asked you to be his girlfriend or as he says it his partner.

—------------

Another week, then another passes

“He hasn't called, I'm just worried.” you say while on facetime as you fold laundry.

“Maybe it isn't allowed.” she says trying to comfort you by making that stupid face people make when they don't know what to say.

“But he told me he could, so I just don't get what changed you know, but maybe you're right, I just miss him.”

“And that's okay, it's healthy.” Since she's left, her phone is full with nothing but you and your rants about life, your day, how much you miss john.

“How long has it been now?”

“Four weeks going on five.” you sigh while getting up to put some clothes away in your closet.

“Well he'll be back soon hopefully, I got to go when my break is over.” she says while blowing you a kiss through the phone.

“Okay bye.” —--------------

You're woken up at four in the morning the next night from your phone buzzing under your pillow, excitedly thinking it's John. You quickly grab it looking at the number and although it's similar in area code some numbers are different but nonetheless you answer.

“Hello.”

“Hey it's Johnny we’ve met. I'm a friend of johns.” soap says into the phone simon and gaz next to him listening.

“Hey is everything okay, is john okay?” you say in a bit of a panic.

“Yes yeah everythings okay we’re or I’m just calling to see how you are, make sure you're okay?”

“Yeah I'm fine are you?” You say a little mind boggled that Johnny is calling you before your partner.

“Yeah I’m well actually.” He says as if this is casual conversation.

“Johnny, why isn’t John the one calling me?” You finally ask, he doesn’t know what to say he looks at the two other men who shrug and are obviously thinking of what to say.

“I don’t know.” Gaz rolls his eyes and Simon pushes the side of Johnny's head at the obvious lie.

“Oh okay. If you can tell him I miss him and that I love him.” All their heads fall into their hands as the choke in your words is obvious.

“I will.”

“Is he avoiding me?” This hadn’t even been a possibility in your mind until right now.

“No, I'm sure he’s just um he’s just busy.” They hear the captain tent start to unzip.

“Okay lass got to go stay safe and do not ever tell the captain about this.” He says before hanging up without another word.

—————

“Who were you talking to?” The captain mindlessly asks as he approaches them sitting down beside Johnny.

“A little lass I met not too long ago.” Not a lie but not the truth.

“Okay, anyways Tomorrow should be our last day. We've got to secure one more piece of information then we’re out of here.”

“Excited to get home?” Gaz asks.

“Yeah but I’ll probably stay at the base a little longer to do these files.”

“Why?” Simon questions, wondering what childish excuse his captain will come up with.

“I’ll be distracted at home.” Simon stands without another word leaving into his own tent.

“What’s his deal?” The captain asks the other two remaining.

“Just being himself.” The captain nods even though there’s definitely more to it.

——————-

Thank you for reading, comments and reposts are immensely appreciated<3

@beebeechaos @ttsbaby01 @arminarlertssword @quakeroaksguy @rafaelacallinybbay @bumblebeesfromvenus @glitterypirateduck @midnights-song @lovelythingsinternal @fruitymoonbeams-blog @kkaaaagt @kit-williams @enfppuff @kythefangirl25 @eviltheleon @here4thespice @dclore22 @raethethey @waves-against-a-cliff @novausstuff @darling006 @vampirekilmerfic @Dreams-of-qian-qian @spngingerbread21 @thepumpkinqueen93 @copiasratscheese @youdontknowe @spyderdoll @angels-gonna-play @viisgrave @lieutenantlashfaz @sunndust @beckythecatqueen-blog @aoioozora @o-birdseed-o @mothmothmothmothmothmoth @ihateuguys @oversensitivitea @spicyspicyliving @maladptivedaydreaming

#captain john price #angst #john price #captain price x female reader #john price x reader #task force 141 #barry sloane #john soap mactavish #simon ghost riley #kyle gaz garrick

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coriolantha · 8 months ago

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‧˚₊•୨ Patience ୧•‧₊˚⊹

mike schmidt x GN! reader

summary: mike comforts you after you've had a long day₊˚⊹:˚｡⋆୨୧˚

tags: fluff, mike being a sweetheart (as always), anxiety, reader has bad self image, insecurities, reader is overwhelmed and needs a break (so real), hugging, cuddling, comfort

wc: 1.1k

notes: hii this is my first fic i've posted on here. ngl i'm... scared. im not proud of this but i can't scrap it this time otherwise i'm never gonna get anything posted LMAO. please leave any criticism in the comments if you'd like, feel free to share any opinions, i want to improve the quality of my writing! thank you sm for reading! 🫶

today has been punishing.

rain trickled down the foggy window, making soft tapping sounds as they hit and fell, reluctantly racing down to gather in the weep holes. the rough, scratchy carpet beneath you beginning to burn as you shuffled around your desolate home.

exhausted, you gave up trying to distract yourself from your main task; your bedroom.

your eyes darted around your cluttered room, glossing over as you noticed every individual piece of clothing that wasn't hung up, organized, and neatly put away. you began to have a headache thinking about where to even begin. you felt like a filthy slob, your surroundings perfectly reflecting how you've felt all day.

you flicked the lights off, the warmly lit room now becoming pitch black, except for the small gleam of light that came through the open door. you sat on your bed, absentmindedly kicking your various pants and t-shirts away from you to give yourself some room to lay down.

mike wouldn't be back home for a while now. it was only 12:45am, which gave you 5 hours and 25 minutes to attempt to sleep before having to get ready for your office job... which would leave little to no time to spend with mike.

fuck mondays.

turning over to your side, you hugged your knees, shivering. no amount of blankets could fix how cold you felt. the truth was, you missed your boyfriend; longing for his cozy hugs and soft, gentle kisses he'd press against your cheek as he consoled you.

you missed him more than anything in the world.

with a blink, the tears that have been collecting in your eyes came down your flushed face at once. laying there, you accepted your pitiful reality, slowly drifting off into unwanted slumber, in solitude.

the time was around 2am when you felt a dip into the bed. panicking, you quickly awoke, shuffling to sit up as fast as possible. although you didn't know of the time, something felt off. mike wasn't supposed to be home yet, that's for sure.

panic turned into confusion as you heard mike, obviously feeling guilty for having jumpscaring you so badly.

"oh, shit- baby, it's me," he whispered apologetically, reaching his hand out to cup your cheek. turning on the dim lamp, he quickly turned back to face you. his eyes bore into yours, scanning to make sure you were going to be alright.

all day he was desperate to see your face, even after his shorter-than-usual-shift. mike couldn't get enough of your perfection, although you always brushed him off whenever he ever mentioned this to you.

he noticed your terrified expression which started to wear off, beginning to blend into relief.

"it's just me... you don't need to worry about anything, okay? i'm right here, no one's gonna hurt you," he muttered, leaning over to press a chaste kiss on your lips, lingering longer than usual.

weight lifted off your shoulders as you began to put pieces together. now, all you needed was an answer to your burning question.

"mike, why did you come home so early? did something happen?" you asked anxiously, looking right back at your boyfriends affectionate, adoring eyes.

"oh, sweetheart..." he soothed, "i got let out early today. nothing worth worrying about. i guess they didn't need me as much as i thought they did," he let out a quick, dry laugh, shaking his head dismissively.

"fuck, i've missed you all day, i'm so damn glad i could leave that job early. anything to see you, my love," he cooed, brushing a strand of hair out of your face, delicately tucking it behind your ear

you were in awe; it was a miracle he came home early, especially today. you were fighting to hold your tears back, mouth quivering as you bit your bottom lip. mike noticed your change in emotion immediately.

"hey hey hey," he whispered urgently, quickly grabbing your hand and giving it a light squeeze, "what's wrong?" his voice drowned in concern.

"i did nothing all day. the only thing i've done is just stand around and... thought of doing something, but i couldn't. i was so tired, but of what? like, why didn't i clean our room? and the worst part is, you have to come home, tired as hell, ready to go to sleep, only to see your messy room and your partner who still hasn't done anything about it," you quavered, sniffling softly as warm tears fell from your eyes.

mike said nothing, but you could sense how hurt he felt after you talked so badly about yourself. he sighed, laying down on the plush mattress. he patted his chest, inviting you to rest your head there. you did so immediately, closing your eyes as you listened closely to his heart beat.

"you know i love you, right?" he asked gently. you stayed quiet, knowing he wasn't expecting an answer.

"i love everything about about you. but the only thing i don't love is how badly you talk of yourself. i hate it. it doesn't make any sense to me," he stressed, stroking your hair soothingly.

"so what if our room is messy? i don't think about that when i come home. all i think about is how i can finally be with you. i'm not going to let some clothes on the floor get in the way of us, ever. or anything, in fact."

you nodded in agreement silently, your tears dry on your cheeks.

"we can tackle this room together. we can do this however you want- i can pick up your clothes while you organize them into whichever area they go to, and i'll pick up my clothes too, but you won't have to organize that, i'll take care of it. how does that sound?" he asked delicately.

you instantly felt a huge weight lift off your shoulders.

"thank you so much, mike. you don't know how much i needed you today," you exhaled, "really."

he looked down lovingly at you, curled up beside him. he kissed your head tenderly, rubbing up and down your back.

goosebumps spread across your arms. you felt so loved and safe.

"the real question is," you suddenly asked, "how are you so perfect? were you made in a factory or something?"

"says you," he laughed, holding you tighter.

the two of you basked in the love you had for one another for a while. no words were exchanged, only him occasionally rubbing his thumb against your arm, while you began to doze off, which caught his attention.

"want me to turn the light off?"

you nodded, wrapping your arm around his stomach.

he turned over once more, pulling the cord of the lamp light, the room now pitch black.

"i love you," he whispered, turning to his side a little more so he could be pressed closer against you.

"i love you too, mike. always," you mumbled back, the two of you drifting off to sleep.

₊˚⊹:˚｡⋆₊୨୧₊˚⊹:˚｡⋆₊

dividers by @f-loqweres 🫶

#josh hutcherson #mike schmidt x reader #mike schmidt x gn!reader #mike schmidt x you #mike schmidt x y/n #mike schmidt #mike schmidt x reader fluff #fluff #mike schmidt x gn!reader fluff #comfort fanfic #comfort fluff #comfort #lovers #self love #jhutch #fanfiction #fanfic

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irrealisms · 1 year ago

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diptych || a c!crimeboys web weave

[sources and IDs under cut]

The first collage is a collection of 14 images.

Image 1: A human hands a raccoon a gun. It is the same image CC!Wilbur sent CC!Tommy with the caption "Me passing the dirty crime boy title to you."

Image 2: Question 4 of 15 Do you love your brother? Answers, please choose 1

Image 3: WILBUR: This isn't just a silly river delta to me anymore, it's got a name, it's got a story, it's— it's L’Manberg, and it's … to me it's, it's you.

Image 4: A painting of Cain and Abel. Cain holds a club in one hand and Abel's wrist in the other as they walk forward. While it is in the background and mostly covered by the other images, their faces and hands are visible.

Image 5: Question 5 of 15 Liar. You feel guilty, don't you? Answers, please choose 1

Image 6: A screenshot from The Fall by SAD-ist. Wilbur has his hand on Tommy's shoulder and is leaning forward to speak to him. Tommy looks anxious.

Image 7: "Am I my brother's keeper?"

Image 8: A piece of paper pinned to the wall, reading "Someone is looking up to you. Don't let that person down." In the context of the collage, it is pinned onto Wilbur's sleeve/upper arm from the SAD-ist screenshot.

Image 9: Question 6 of 15 But you're the one that left him. Answers, please choose 1 [check mark next to the selected answer] I wanted to and I wanted it to hurt him so he could let go of me.

Image 10: WILBUR: I’m glad, Tommy! You know what, I’m glad! Because me and you were never good for that server. We just weren’t!

Image 11: When I close my eyes I'm climbing in the dark Trying not to fall apart Sometimes I get so high Falling is the only out I see And I don't wanna take you down with me

Image 12: a softer world comic. the text reads "At my worst, I worry you'll realize/you deserve better./At my best, I worry you won't."

Image 13: Question 7 of 15 Do you think your brother loves you? Answers, please choose 1

Image 14: WILBUR: Tommy, come over here, please, I— Tommy, I was scared I wouldn’t see you again if you didn’t forgive me. And I didn’t want to not see you again.

The second image is a collage of 11 images.

Image 1: WILBUR: You love it, don’t you, Tommy? You love… L’Manberg…

Image 2: a softer sea comic. the text reads "You're my brother and I love you./That's it./No punchline."

Image 3: A painting of two men standing next to each other. they look similar. the one on the right puts his hand flat above both of their heads, sheltering them; the one on the left has his hand up to touch the hand of the one on the right. the painting is titled My Brother's Keeper.

Image 4: I will stand in the dark for you I will hold you back by force I will stand here right outside your door I won’t see you disgraced I will protect your name and your heart Because I miss my friend

Image 5: A screenshot from Final Waltz by SAD-ist. Wilbur has his hand on Tommy's shoulder. Tommy looks up at him.

Image 6: In essence, the entire Bible is written as an affirmative response to this question.

Image 7: TOMMY: I believe that everyone’s got a little bit of good in them. And I know that Wilbur had good in him. Alright?

Image 8: This is no garden. This is my brother and I need a shovel to love him.

Image 9: A collage of an open book with forests, butterflies, etc. the text reads: i care for you still and i will forever.

Image 10: A painting of two young boys wading in the ocean and holding hands. The smaller one has spiderman swim trunks.

Image 11: TOMMY: It’s not about chances, Foolish. It’s about making sure you don’t give up on the people you care about.

#mcyt #dsmp #wilbur soot #tommyinnit #crimeboys #c!tommy #c!wilbur #c!crimeboys #wilbur #tommy #web weaving #web weave #collage #my edit

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ieafy · 3 months ago

Note

I'm going to be asking a lot of artists I follow this question, but how did you develop your style? It SEEMS like most people find their style and stick with it forever, just making improvements and iterations. I tend to work in a lot of different styles because I enjoy doing that, though I know there are things I gravitate towards as well. But I wonder what your journey was and how you got feedback and improved while staying true to what you enjoyed?

There are a few parts to this answer, the first being that I don't feel I'm one of those artists who had a main style and stuck with it, altering along the way. I'll be speaking to my art journey over 12 years so far

For the first 8 years of taking art seriously, I was stressed about not having 'my style', and I stressed about not producing work to a standard I could really appreciate nearly everyday. I've let this stress go since, and I accept whatever my body/mind feels like making...

Whether it's working with a theme for a period of time, experimenting for a piece, etc

For me, accepting variety in my own work (in quality, in style, in medium, in success) relied on self acceptance outside of my art. Basically, practicing accepting good/bad/different/a variety of aspects of myself, and showing up for them as they are/showing up for myself as I am, taught me how to tolerate the same in my art work. A genuine non-judgement approach to myself, and now my art.

I don't worry about 'art style' anymore, I only care about authentically growing in my work/life.

So, notice things away from art. Notice yourself caringly. How you are feeling? What is a desire that comes up today? Where are you drawing your energy from by today? Is it others or love, growth, spite, joy? Notice with curiosity and courage.

And notice what draws your observation in real life: a collection of clovers and rocks, the way light bounces off of and within transparent stones, how plants and trees glisten in the morning dew, a particular hue of blue, particular textures of a flower, etc

Your real voice in your work and art will reflect what you are genuinely drawn to, not what you think your art "should be" like

Today, I notice desire to look at birds, to draw birds, and experiment with traditional inking. I feel unattached to the judgements of others, and want to feel gentle, draw gently.

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mollyrolls · 4 months ago

Text

all shades of blue; hinata shoyo

track 10 / now playing / track 12 : ̗̀➛ weatherman collection

Broken bottles shine / just like stars, make a wish anyway. / Just your smile lit a sixty-watt bulb in my house / that was darkened for days. / Been thinking you probably should stay.

tags: gn!reader x timeskip!hinata, established relationship, hurt/comfort, angst, fluff, mentions of blood and alcohol, happy ending.

wc: 2k

an: this one is dedicated to the lovely @nectardaddy, because wine-drinker hinata is so canon that it literally changed the original idea i had for this song. I'm proud of this one :)

Superstitions are a funny thing. You don’t necessarily believe in them, but you pick up the penny anyway, avoid cracks in the sidewalk, throw the salt over your shoulder. They feel too simple to avoid.

Superstitions make it easier to explain away the shitty things that happen to you, rather than letting you spiral into despair about what you’ve done and why you deserve it.

Superstitions also have a lot to say about the broken glass you find lying around your feet, your glass of wine long gone.

Some people would say that it's a sign of demise and betrayal. Others claim that wreck and ruin are just around the corner. Most people would agree that it’s a sign of heartbreak.

Regardless of what they have to say, you have a mess on your hands that you are too paralyzed to fix. Your mind is screaming to move, get towels, do something, but all you can do is sit and stare.

Maybe on a better day, you could ignore it. Chalk it up to a shaky hand or a loud noise from the movie playing in the other room. Wipe away the spill, brush the glass into the trash, and forget that it happened.

But today there’s something about this mess, ruby liquid spilling and staining the floor, bleeding out like a wound, that makes your heart ache and renders you useless to the world. A sense of foreboding sends a chill down your spine.

You barely notice your boyfriend crouching next to you, examining the damage and trying to fix things. He’s not looking at the mess on the floor but rather at your body, turning your hands over in fear of cuts or scrapes.

And you're not quite sure what it is, maybe shock, maybe a cut, maybe the sudden feeling that everything is too much for you to handle right now, but the pressure building behind your eyes is bursting before you feel it start.

One measly tear drops, landing cleanly on the back of his hand. That single tear seems to worry him more than the glass ever did, and the emotions flooding his eyes are overwhelming: worry, fear, relief, panic.

“Are you okay?”

Hinata is a lover. He might as well be the personification of it. His love is unconditional, abundant, no one is too insignificant to get a piece. It’s one of your favorite things about him, but it's also the thing that causes most of your despair.

Because you are not like that. Yes, you love him, but nowhere near as easily or openly. Your love is not explosive and all-encompassing, but quiet and steady, falling into the background. Sometimes you wonder why he sticks around at all, when he could easily find someone that can give him the love that he deserves.

You’ve never voiced your concerns to him, somewhat worried that he’ll realize you’re right and leave you in the dust. But more realistically, you know he’ll deny it. And that hurts worse.

You don’t think he’d understand how you feel, to no fault of his own. Going above and beyond in everything he does is in his blood.

You forget he’s like that because he also knows how it feels to not be enough.

So when your thoughts get to be too much, you box them all up and push them under your bed. Waiting for a night alone where you can cry and mourn and worry. He’ll come home and soothe you like he always does, but you vowed a long time ago to never let him know the worst of it.

“Are you okay?”

You hum distantly, letting Hinata continue his examination. When he finds a small cut on your finger, he’s immediately up and getting you aid. All you can do is stay in your position on the floor, pathetic, like a dog waiting for their owner to return.

He’s gentle when he cleans the wounds. Apologizes when the saline stings, like he’s responsible for the pain. Kisses your finger after wrapping the bandaid.

Once he’s done, he settles back on his heels, kneeling before you. He cups your hand in his, a warm and sturdy presence you drink up.

It’s quiet, movie in the other room muffled. Quiet moments with Hinata can often be overwhelming, but that might be due to the circumstances you find them in. Him waiting for something you can’t provide, an impossible persistence that’s somehow never overbearing.

And it’s hard. It’s just another way that you’re not enough for him. He deserves someone who can open up, share what they’re feeling. Someone who can care for him the way he cares for you.

“Hey- hey, what happened?”

You didn’t feel them start, so the tears rolling down your face are unwelcome. Blinking them away just produces more and you can’t make them stop.

“Are you upset about the glass? We can get a new one.”

You chuckle horsely. “No, that’s fine.” Prying a hand from his, you scrub at your eyes, hoping the sting will keep you from unraveling. Hoping to feel anything but this unbearable sadness.

“Then what is it?”

“It’s stupid.”

He stays crouching with you, tracing the lines in your hand. “I’m sure it’s not.”

His finger settles at the topmost line, smoothing along the sloping curve, finding the path easily in the depths and grooves.

And he stays sitting with you, letting the wine seep into the floorboards, just waiting until you’re ready to share.

At times like these, you resent your boyfriend and his patience. You know he’ll wait until he gets an answer. As more time passes, the more guilty you feel.

Finally, you sigh, resigning yourself to a truly miserable conversation.

“Do you know what they say about broken glass?”

He shakes his head no, brows pinching together just slightly. You don’t like seeing him worried, especially not over things like this. Like you.

But in his funny way of showing up, he squeezes your hand to keep you going. You feel your pulse humming beneath him.

“Some people think it’s a sign of heartbreak. If you break a glass, there’s something bad about to happen in your life, like losing a job or breaking up with someone. And I know it's stupid, but I just got scared.”

The admission leaves you breathless. He just hums. Lifting one hand to trace the curve of your jaw, the other hand never leaving yours. He won’t let you look anywhere but his eyes and all you see is raw devotion.

Instead of some grand speech, some large gesture about how much he loves you and he’d never leave you, he just stays. Admiring you in this moment, the luminescent bulbs of the kitchen lights casing you in warm light.

After a while, he lets go of your face and picks up a shard of glass sitting next to you. Thinking as he turns it over in his hand.

“It’s not stupid, but I don’t think it's true. I’m not going to let your clumsiness dictate that we’re over.”

He raises the shard of glass up to you, letting the light hit it.

“I think that it's how you look at it. You don’t have to let it be heartbreak, but maybe it’s something that gets a new life.”

“How?” You whisper, fearful you’ll shatter the moment with even a breath that’s too heavy.

“Anything you want. We could put it back together, use it as stained glass, throw it away, make wishes. I’ll eat it if you want.”

“Don’t eat glass, Shoyo.”

When you laugh, he looks at you. His shoulders drop, relieved you’re no longer crying.

“Okay. I won’t.” The relief is palpable in the air and it makes breathing just a bit easier. He’s always made things easier.

“Can I ask you something else?”

You nod, voice too caught in your throat to say anything.

“Why did this upset you so much? Did you think I wanted to leave?”

And in one soul-crushing move, he shrinks into himself. So insignificant you might have thought he was just breathing. But you love quietly and steadily and know his mannerisms like a second language.

“Did I do something to make you want to leave?”

The idea makes your mending heart shatter once again.

It’s your turn to grab at him, cupping his hands in yours and bringing them close to his chest. The proximity feels right.

“No. Never.”

“Then why?”

A simple question, one that makes you feel like you’re drowning. Because he sounds so gutted, an indiscernible voice crack that only the most attentive would pick up on. And you have to disappoint him once again with your answer. You know it’ll turn into him comforting you, like always, when you need to be the one there for him.

But you’ll do anything to make him happy again, and right now that means sharing the truth.

“It's just… sometimes I feel like I drag you down. You love everyone so easily and it's so hard for me. You don’t get enough from me, so why should I keep you here when you deserve so much more?”

He sits there, letting your words soak into him. While you’re waiting for the final blow, to your surprise he laughs. A wholehearted one, one so joyous you can’t help but laugh along, even if it's strained.

Once his laughter subsides he sighs, your name a whisper on the wind. “You think I don’t get enough love from you? Really?”

You nod, not sure what else you can do.

“Then I must be doing a horrible job at showing my gratitude. I feel so loved by you it can be overwhelming.”

You can hardly believe the words he’s saying. They hit you like a shock to the system, turning your world inside out.

“But I don’t do anything crazy or romantic like you. Does that not get to you?”

“Not at all. I don’t want to be with another version of myself, and there’s not a gesture you could make that would mean more to me than you coming to all my games with my name on your back. Having you in my corner is more than I need.”

You hear the words he’s saying, but your mind and your heart are at war. He’s breaking down your walls without even trying but your brain refuses to accept it.

“Don’t you ever get tired of having to do so much for me?”

“I like taking care of you. Don’t say that like it's a chore or a burden. It makes me feel wanted.”

He answers all your questions with ease, never once diminishing you or making you feel wrong for asking them.

And bit by bit, piece by piece, you’re starting to believe him. Hinata has taken up the jagged pieces of your heart, reached into the darkest parts of your soul, and brought them back to life.

Just to drive it home, he pulls you in closer, resting your head against his chest. His heartbeat is strong and steady, racing just a bit faster now that you’re so close.

“I want you to tell me if you feel like this again. I can’t believe I let you go on so long thinking you were anything less than enough. You’re-”

His voice falters, and he changes direction.

“Let’s make a wish, okay?”

He picks up a shard of glass and carefully places it in your palm, covering it with his. You’re protected from any jagged edges or loose flecks by the expanse of his hand.

“You can’t say it out loud though. Or it won’t come true.” You warn, right before the words fall off his lips.

His radiant smile peeks through, shining a few rays down to illuminate the scene before you.

“I wish that you’ll always be by my side and that you’ll keep loving me the way only you do. Nothing can take that away from me, broken glass or anything else.”

When his golden eyes meet your gaze, it’s like you’re falling in love all over again.

And sitting here, crouched on the floor with your lover, admiring a broken shard of glass, you’re glad he’s here.

#haikyuu #hq #haikyuu angst #haikyuu fanfic #haikyuu fluff #haikyuu x reader #hinata shoyo #hinata x you #hinata x reader #hinata shoyo fanfic #hinata fanfic #hinata angst #hinata fluff #mollys bookshelf #mw.hinata shoyo

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deceptive-daydreams · 1 year ago

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Ch. 1 | Ch. 2 | Ch. 3 | Ch. 4 | Ch. 5 | Ch. 6 | Ch. 7 | Ch. 8 | Ch. 9 | Ch. 10 | Ch. 11 | Ch. 12 | Ch. 13 | Ch. 14 |

Smoke Signals

Chapter Seven - Halloween

W/C: 10K

Eddie x Fem reader - Grumpy!Bartender!Eddie x Shy!Reader

Or where you show up to the town's biggest Halloween Bash and you unexpectantly take on the roll of a babysitter.

A/N: this is a long one..and tbh some of it isn't edited...but i'm super excited about this one but also nervous.

Masterlist

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Bass bumped through the unfamiliar house, vibrating all the way down the driveway and to the street where you stood. Shouting could be heard, no doubt a collection of drunks getting overly excited about something usually mundane. Fog smothered the driveway, a decision you felt was made by someone sober at the time of setting it up only to neglect the fact that everyone would be wasted by the time it got dark, sending people tumbling down the driveway in their drunken state. It did add to the atmosphere though, a nice touch that gave it that eerie, spooky feel the owner was probably going for.

As you trekked up the lengthy and steep driveway, a mock graveyard sat to the right, taking up the space that would usually be the front yard. Fake limbs stuck out of the dirt and splatters of blood painted the plastic headstones. A lonely skeleton sat propped up against one, his arm hanging around it as if it were his good friend. Some pumpkins appeared to be slaughtered and littered throughout the yard, the guts surely rotting in the grass and in one of the trees, hung a hopefully fake body, swaying in the chilly breeze.

From what you had heard, the owners went all out every year, Halloween night being their specialty. The closer to the house you got, the louder the music and the louder the voices got. Donnie had told you that it would be a rager but you severely underestimated her words and took them as a joke. You were already hesitant to even attend but now, you were fully questioning if you should even dare to step through the door. It’d be smart to turn around now and go home, maybe watch a few movies and indulge in that candy you’d bought and placed in a large bowl on the coffee table at home. Half of it was gone of course, you stealing a piece here and there throughout the past week. You could stuff your face with the rest if you left now.

No.

You had to be brave and walk through that door with confidence. Even if it was fake. You were never going to meet new people if you kept hiding away in your tower. This town was never going to feel like home if you didn't start treating it like it. Donnie was the closest person you had to a friend and as much as you appreciated her, she was more than half your age and had a whole family already. She mentioned that people ‘your age’ would definitely be at this party, everyone went to this party.

You can’t miss it. She assured.

But on another hand, no one would miss you anyway, no one ever did. Even if they did know of you. There was no harm in trekking back down the driveway and rushing home to snuggle up in your pajamas, right?

No, you have to do this. You have to push yourself out of your comfort zone even if it feels like you're diving off a cliff. But what if everyone stares at you? And whispers about how they didn’t invite you? Donnie promised anyone who’s anyone attends this party, even people from a few town’s over who hear about it from a friend of a friend. So why couldn’t you shake the feeling that you just didn’t belong? That you were intruding.

Everyone’s gonna hate me.

It was especially embarrassing that you were wearing a Dorothy from the Wizard of Oz costume. It wasn’t even all that out there but you felt so uncomfortable without your standard wardrobe. You felt as if your ruby red glittery heels would suddenly draw unwanted attention, your pigtails making a mockery out of you even if just for the costume. Everyone dressed up so why were you the exception? Why were you the only one they would single out, especially in such a common Halloween costume? You were sure there would probably be much more flamboyant costumes, ghouls and goblins covered in blood, zombies with ungodly amounts of face paint, and even vampires with those ridiculous plastic teeth. No one made fun of them so why were you so insecure?

Every possible outcome ran through your brain while you stalled on the doormat. That is until two men dressed in chicken suits bursted through the door, cackling while they set up for a smoke break on the front porch, completely missing you as you stood there terrified. They leaned over the railing as they went on, slurring about how crazy it was that someone had somehow punctured a hole in the keg, a seemingly impossible task.

You took the opportunity to slip in through the cracked door, gently closing it behind you as you entered the chaos that was the famous Knife’s Edge Halloween Bash. Strobe lights flashed in the corners of what you could make out as the living room and the regular light bulbs in the ceiling were all switched out for purple and green, adding to the ambience. The floor was hidden beneath a sea of people dancing their hearts out to Thriller by Michael Jackson, some attempting to actually perform the dance, and others simply flailing their limbs around and hoping for the best.

A rather convincing mummy was stealing the show, everyone else creating a circle around him as he danced like no one was watching. Not one person glanced your way, either too intoxicated to notice or just unbothered seeing as there were already over a hundred people occupying the house. The line of cars you’d seen up and down the street should have given that away but to be fair, you were too busy running circles in your head and rehearsing how you were going to walk in. All of that went straight to the garbage once you saw the nature of the place.

Everyone was too caught up in having fun to take note of a timid Dorothy sneaking through the front door. Fun. Something you couldn’t see yourself having unless you had at least a drink or two in you. It’s sad but it was the only way to loosen up around such a large volume of people. Sobriety was not an option unless you wanted to remain an anxious fly on the wall.

The only issue was finding the source of alcohol, more than likely in the kitchen which you had yet to locate. In order to get anywhere, you would have to weave through the crowd of sweaty bodies, the smell of tequila and beer already filling your nostrils just by standing a few feet away from them.

Taking a deep breath, you clutch your little wicker basket close to your body and begin squeezing in between people with a polite ‘excuse me’ accompanying every accidental touch. Along the way you pass a preppy cheerleader, a few stereotypical vampires, a cowboy and a cow, a dentist, and some guy with a fake chainsaw covered in fake blood. You’re finally able to see your destination just through a large archway, relief already finding you as you inch closer and closer.

The kitchen’s fluorescent lighting is a major contrast to the purple and green throughout the rest of the house. It still follows the spooky theme, however, with an orange tablecloth draped over the island and purple and orange streamers hanging from the doorway. On the island sits a large punch bowl filled with mysterious red liquid along with a stack of red cups and a few choices of liquor next to it. A bowl of pretzels and some Halloween themed cupcakes are placed next to that, and at the other end, is a bucket of candy along with some various kinds of chips.

Hanging from the chandelier is a homemade ghost using a torn sheet, the eyes and mouth filled in with sharpie. The floor is sticky as you slowly make your way forward, most likely the mysterious liquid that had been spilled several times throughout the night already. More shouting can be heard from the living room, some kind of dance off being announced that you would gladly hide from. So far, you didn’t recognize anyone although it would be pretty difficult to seeing as everyone was dressed up.

Gingerly, you grab a cup and scoop the smallest amount of the mystery liquid in. Upon taking the tiniest sip, you can determine that it's some kind of jungle juice. A hangover in a cup. With disgust written on your face, you discreetly throw out the remaining juice in the sink, instead opting to take a shot or two to loosen up. Maybe just one for now. You learned your lesson when taking four straight tequila shots at a time and didn’t need a repeat. Especially at a party with several hundred people as witnesses.

So you fill the bottom of your cup with some whiskey, a generous shot. Throwing it back, it goes down a lot smoother than that tequila had, the burn being mild but still causing your face to twist. The cup is discarded in the trash, cutting yourself off before you can get ahead so as not to get absolutely wasted within minutes. If you had an appetite, you’d snatch one of those delicious looking cupcakes but unfortunately, you needed to pace yourself. Nerves and alcohol didn't make for the most stable stomach and you were already feeling queasy just from the mere thought of having to socialize with strangers.

Exploring further into the house, you exit through the other archway leading into a dining room that displays even more food than the kitchen, a whole buffet laid out for guests including potato salad, macaroni salad, various horderves, snack mix, a giant bowl of M&Ms, and more. A dream for a child, dinner and dessert all in one.

A few partygoers were scooping some food onto their plates, chatting about who knows what while you moved on to the next room which appeared to be the family room. The TV played some kind of horror film while absolutely no one watched it, the room almost empty aside from a couple in the corner making out.

A few pops and some celebratory yells are heard just out the back sliding door, drawing you in. The closer you got, you could see someone dressed as a scarecrow holding a bottle of champagne overflowing onto the deck. You were curious as to what everyone was celebrating but got cold feet when you reached for the handle, your hand glued to it but not putting any effort into actually sliding it open. Just as you decided you were going to chicken out and find a corner to hang out in instead, someone points at the door, outing you, causing your blood to run cold in embarrassment. When the scarecrow turns around, you can see that it's Donnie, face paint pulling her whole look together.

At the sight of you, her face lights up, hands thrown up in excitement as the champagne she’s holding sloshes over and further coats the deck. She doesn’t seem to mind, as she hands off the bottle to someone else and makes her way over to the door, sliding it open. Your cheeks begin to feel hot as people stare at the interaction, unwanted attention that you could’ve escaped had you been quicker.

“You made it!” She just about squeals, giving you a tight squeeze.

She had clearly had a few drinks, unafraid of any affection as she previously stated that she hated friendly affection of any kind, more prone to use her words to show appreciation. But you didn’t mind, Donnie was the one person you were comfortable with and your one friend so if she happened to show affection while under the influence, so be it. And maybe by her doing so, you wouldn’t appear to be such a freak to what seemed to be her friends. Maybe it would grant you acceptance into their circle.

“I made it.” You repeat with a polite smile.

“So we were just popping some champagne we found.” Donnie explains. “No rhyme or reason, we just found it inside and thought, hell lets just go at it.”

Nodding, you try to appear as enthusiastic as possible, covering up your anxiety to the best of your ability. People were still staring at you and it was proving difficult to just ignore it, holes practically being burned into you. A few of them you recognized as regulars at the bar but the rest were complete strangers. Either way, you were intimidated.

“You want some?” Donnie offers to which you begin shaking your head frantically.

“No, no, I’m okay! I already had something and I have to drive later anyway.” You explain.

Donnie nods understandingly before starting a dreadful introduction to the group. She points out Brian, Sam, and Wyatt, her sons who were fully grown, the oldest Brian, being around thirty. You didn’t catch who was the youngest or middle since Donnie was talking so fast. Then she reintroduces you to her husband, Nathan, who you had previously met at the supermarket though Donnie didn’t seem to remember in her current state. Then there were the owners of the house, Crystal and Gabriel, a very nice couple in their forties who made Halloween their night and everyone knew it. Apparently Thanksgiving was Donnie and Nathan’s holiday according to a little comment uttered by Crystal. There were what seemed to be a dozen more introductions though you couldn’t recall every single person. You only remember Donnie skimming by an introduction to Jett’s mom, Kristy who seemed like a lovely woman.

Thankfully, once everyone was acquainted with you, they seemed to move one rather quickly and continued on with their festivities. A fire pit sat in the middle of the deck, crackling away while a few individuals rested on the chairs circling it, warming themselves up. Some orange lights were wound around the railing accompanied by some fake cotton spiderwebs. Everyone held a drink in their hand except you and you were starting to regret not at least carrying your empty cup with you to occupy your awkward hands. Rookie mistake.

Your breathing becomes increasingly shallow with each passing second, panic settling in as you attempt to remember how to act like a person. You almost contemplate rushing off to the bathroom to hide but quickly scrap the idea, knowing Donnie may take notice. Instead, you stupidly shuffle your feet in place, trying to ground yourself with no luck.

In your inner turmoil, you can vaguely hear everyone else engaging in conversation about their lives or some silly story. Something you didn’t care to tune into as your inner monologue chants at you to run. Even with the one shot that you thought would relax you, you still feel your shoulders tensing and your jaw tightening anxiously. If anyone were to initiate small talk with you right now, you’d come off like a dunce, thoughts unable to form gracefully. Tonight was definitely a bad idea and you should’ve just stayed home where you knew your place.

Uncomfortably, you remain standing as everyone passes around the champagne. There was no way to dismiss yourself without seeming like you were rude and awkward. This was hell.

“Okay, elders!” You hear a familiar voice from around the corner, steps clunking up the deck stairs. “We got your drugs, now pay up.”

Jett emerges, a second pair of steps heard behind him. He’s dressed like a greaser, hair slicked back as he wears a white shirt tucked into his tight jeans.

“We got the goodies!” Eddie singsongs from behind him, dangling a plastic bag full of weed.

Eddie seems to be dressed as…himself? With a bit of smudged eyeliner. His torso is covered with his standard black leather jacket and he’s pretty much wearing what he wears in his day to day. Except when he dramatically flings his leather jacket at Jett, he sports a very revealing cut off shirt, all ripped and torn. And his fingernails are painted black.

“Jeez, Eddie! You’re gonna catch a cold, put that back on or go inside!” Donnie scolds.

“‘M fine.” He mutters, tossing the weed at Jett who just barely catches it as he drops Eddie’s jacket to the floor.

Donnie sighs, giving up on the argument seeing that Eddie was too stubborn to listen. Suddenly you feel yourself warm up, the chill October air no longer pinching at your cheeks as they grow hot again. Not out of embarrassment this time.

“Gon’ get ‘nother beer.” Eddie mumbles, stumbling toward you though he doesn’t realize it yet.

“That kid gives me a headache and he’s not even mine.” Donnie says.

“Hey!” Eddie whines, turning back toward the group mid stride. “You claimed me ‘s one ‘f your own, ‘member?” He points at her.

Several people chuckle at the scene while Donnie rolls her eyes and waves him off. He was clearly a lot more intoxicated than everyone else. His waddle toward the sliding door is evidence enough.

“Drink some water, boy.” Nathan advises.

“‘Rink some water.” Eddie mocks in a high pitch to himself while hiccuping before colliding into your shoulder. “Oh shit.”

Stumbling backwards, you stabilize yourself while his hands reach out and rest a bit too comfortably on top of your shoulders, heavy handed. Almost as if he were using you to keep himself up. When you dare to glance up, you’re met with heavy, glazed over eyes, bloodshot and decorated in smeared black liner. His lips paint a perfectly content smile as he sways back and forth, unbalanced.

“Bambi.” He cooes.

“Hi.” You whisper, startled like a mouse.

“Heyyy.” He draws out eyes becoming even heavier if possible.

“Um—“

“Munson, get off ‘er.” Jett laughs, shoving Eddie to the side. He manages to save himself from face planting into the deck, leaning himself against the side of the house.

“Should kick ‘yr ass.” Eddie mutters, glaring at Jett.

“No one wants you leanin’ on ‘em like that!” Jett defends. “Hey, Bambi.” He greets you.

At this, Eddie appears enraged, his face visibly going red as he shoots Jett a glare that no one would want to be on the receiving end of. Everyone else seemed to have moved on, paying no mind to Eddie’s sudden shift in mood.

“Hi, Jett.” You reply, a friendly grin gracing your lips.

With a grunt, Eddie pushes off the wall and storms inside, evidently pissed about something. Jett shares the same confused expression as you, shrugging while he starts asking how you are, if you’re enjoying the party, and if you’d seen the huge array of food they had out yet. You answer all of his questions to his satisfaction but mentally, you’re trying to track Eddie down. Trying to understand what set him off and made him leave with such irritation. Had this been the first week you met him, you would’ve dismissed it as his normal temper but now that you’d known him for almost two months and gotten to know how his emotions function, you knew better.

He had also clearly been under the influence which could mean nothing happened and his emotions were just sensitive. But you had a strong suspicion that there was a definite reason he abruptly got angry and rushed inside. No one else seemed to notice, aside from you and Jett. And he obviously paid no mind and didn’t intend on going after Eddie so maybe you were missing something. Or maybe everyone was also blinded by their intoxication and you were the only sound minded individual in the group right now.

“Oh and then—“

“I think I’m gonna head inside, it’s kinda cold out here.” You interrupt Jett’s tangent on his and Eddie’s journey down the road to collect the weed they had been sent to pick up.

“Oh well just take this.” He says, snatching up Eddie’s jacket off the ground and handing it to you.

You should’ve come up with a different excuse though to be fair, you didn’t think he’d hand you Eddie’s jacket. He was supposed to follow your lead and let you go inside. Wasn’t he concerned about Eddie too?

“T-thank you.” You clutch the jacket in your hand, draping it over your forearm.

“Yeah! So we were just walking—“

“Jett, I’m sorry I’m gonna run to the bathroom, okay?” You cut him off again.

You felt bad for seeming so uninterested in what he had to say but you couldn’t go much longer without knowing if Eddie had gotten himself into trouble. He was super out of it from what you could tell and it was eating away at you. It only made it worse that he was so angry and if you were the most sober one at the party, it would be in your hands if something happened to him and you knew he had run off.

“Okay—“

Before Jett can get another word in, you spin on your heel and rush inside, the music still blaring and everyone still screaming from the living room. The whole house felt like it was vibrating, your body buzzing as the bass dropped. That same couple still remained in the corner making out, their stamina impressing you.

Entering the kitchen, there’s no sight of Eddie, only a few guests topping off their drinks and toasting to themselves loudly. Realistically, you should take another shot to calm your nerves but this nightmare of an evening needed to be cut short and you would need to drive home as soon as you found him and returned him to the group.

Dreadfully walking yourself back into the living room where the heart of the party beats, you focus on each individual, attempting to spot the one dressed in all black with almost no shirt, tattoos, and a head full of brown curls. It proves to be more difficult since the lighting was so dim and the strobe lights left you seeing spots.

Everyone seems to be having the time of their life and here you are, worried sick about someone who never thinks twice about you. Even before he arrived you were having the worst time and wanted to go home immediately. Halloween would’ve been perfect if you stayed home where you couldn’t make a fool of yourself in front of people.

“Tequila!” A woman dressed as a slutty maid shouts, carrying a tray full of shots past you, only eliciting a gag from the back of your throat at the smell. “No tequila for you then.” She jokes, you shaking your head as you cover your nose.

It was obvious that Eddie wasn’t going to hit the dance floor after getting so infuriated. Unless that’s the first thing he would do in his state? You weren’t completely sure but you were almost certain that he wouldn’t. As a large group gathers around for shots, you manage to escape down a hallway where you imagine the bathroom might be. It’s completely dark, the only light coming from underneath a door on the left, probably the bathroom. At the end of the hall is what looks like a bedroom, the moonlight shining in from the blinds to just barely reveal a bed.

No one seemed to be in said bed, an empty room for people to crash in at the end of the night. Eddie could be in the bathroom but you’d have to be sure before leaving. With a shy knock on the door, struggle to hear any voice that might respond. Pressing your ear to the door, you try again, only to be met with the annoyed voice of a woman saying she’ll be out in a second and that she was fixing her lipstick.

Clearly not Eddie.

At this point you’ve covered the downstairs, no sign of the man so far. He would be good at hide and seek, you assume. Or maybe you’re just the blind. Retracing your steps back out into the living room, you collide with a few bodies, none of them paying any mind to the impact as they continue to dance, flailing around like rag dolls. You didn’t think it was possible for the room to get any more humid but you were proven wrong, sweat grazing your arms as you pass by and attempt to avoid touching anyone, failing miserably.

Your perfect ruby heels are starting to kill you, digging into your skin in all the wrong places, making it more difficult to walk with every step you take. You know for sure that come the morning, you’ll have blisters that will be bothering you for days. Reluctantly, you slide them off and scoop them up, dangling them by your fingers, Eddie’s jacket still hanging off your arm. You were becoming a walking closet.

Going upstairs didn’t seem like a great decision seeing as this wasn’t your house and you didn’t want to give Crystal and Gabriel the impression that you liked to snoop around. Although, if someone did see you, you could just vouch for yourself by saying you were looking for a bathroom and the downstairs one was taken already. So up you went, nervously glancing behind you. The coast seemed clear, not one person paying you any mind, the party still capturing their undivided attention.

Like magic, Eddie appears as you reach the top of the stairs, leaning against one of the doors as he weakly knocks, his forehead pressed to the wood. He was gorgeous, the perfect image of an 80’s rockstar gone 90’s. His back was nearly on display, shoulders all broad and waist lean. You could make out bat wings tattooed symmetrically on his shoulder blades and something along his ribs. The sight flustered you but you were here for one purpose and that was to retrieve him and get him back to Donnie so she or someone else could keep an eye on him.

“Dude, ‘urry up!” He whines into the door, pounding on it with more force. “Hafta piss ‘n maybe throw u—up.” He hiccups.

You want to giggle but quickly remember how miserable that feeling is, your stomach rejecting you and releasing its contents in protest of the alcohol you continue to bombard it with. You realize that no light pours out from underneath the door which meant the bathroom had to be available.

“Eddie, I don’t think anyone’s in there.” You offer, slowly walking up behind him.

“Pfft, it’s locked.” He scoffs, hitting his forehead against the wood with a thump.

When you reach your hand toward the handle and twist the door open, he gasps, nearly falling head first into the bathroom. It wasn’t thought through, opening a door with a grown man leaning his full weight onto it. Luckily, he catches himself, hands gripping the countertop as he sways.

“Shit, I’m sorry.” You hiss, voice tinged with regret.

“‘S okay.” He mumbles, pulling his zipper down.

“Oh!” Covering your eyes, you shut the door.

“Wait, wait, wait!”

“Eddie, I am not standing in there with you while you pee!” You yell through the door.

“God.” He groans, a stream following. “Just—I know!”

“I’ll stand right here and make sure you don’t fall and hit your head, okay?” You bargain.

“Okay.”

After several seconds, you don’t hear any movement, worry kicking in once again. He couldn’t have hit his head, you would’ve heard it. What if he passed out but didn’t hit anything? It was pathetic, the way worry would grow inside you solely for him. Just when you begin a countdown to burst through the door to check on him, you can hear the unmistakable sound of him puking his guts out. Now you wonder if you should go in anyway and hold his hair back.

Dry heaving is heard through the door, the awful sound the only thing you can focus on. You can’t take it anymore. You can only hope he remembered to zip his pants back up in his drunken state. Opening the door, you reveal Eddie hunched over the toilet, his hair draped over his shoulders, clearly in his way. You rush to his side, dropping your heels and his jacket in the process and collecting his curls in your hands, pulling them back as he breathes heavily, drool hanging from his mouth. His eyes are wet and his hands are shaky as they grip the toilet seat. You feel as if he should be vomiting in your lap for payback for puking on him that one night.

“Ah shit.” He complains, shaking his head. “Round two, get o—out”. He gags.

Throw up was the embodiment of the most disgusting thing you could ever think of, smell and everything but you couldn’t find it in yourself to care at this moment. Even with his clammy skin and pukey lips.

“It’s okay, just let it out.” You encourage him, hesitantly running a hand over his back, regretting doing so as you feel the muscles under his skin tense.

“Seriously, out.” He almost vomits, swallowing it down.

The action alone should be enough to have you jumping up and leaving but you stay.

“Eddie, just puke it all up. It’s fine. I’m gonna hold your hair.” You tell him.

He shudders, glancing over at you with his bloodshot eyes. It’s like he’s shooting daggers at you before his eyes soften involuntarily, irises becoming that caramel toned warmness you were becoming more and more familiar with. His pupils are dilated, huge planets in the middle of his eyes, clearly high and drunk though you still recognize the puppy dog-look he was giving you.

“Eddie, if you don’t puke right now—“

As if on command, he lunges forward and spews out the rest of his stomach. The sound makes you wince but you try to hide it as best as you can for his sake. It’s not his fault his body is reacting to the substances he put into his body. Maybe it is his fault since he put those substances into his body but regardless, you felt for him. Once it has to come out, it has to come out and there’s no going back.

“There you go.” You soothe, fingertips gently raking up and down his spine.

“Fuck.” He whispers into the bowl, spitting out a huge glob of saliva. It would repulse you if it were anyone else.

“It’s okay.” You whisper just as quietly.

Grabbing the toilet paper and folding it a few times, you rip it and hand it to him to clean himself up. You linger for a few seconds, waiting for him to grab it but he only continues to stare into the toilet bowl, hands braced on either side. Just when you’re about to speak up again, he goes in for a third round. You can’t help but feel bad for him even if the smell is nauseating you.

“You want some water?” You offer, standing up in preparation to go find him some.

“No, stay.” He blindly grabs the hem of your dress, wiping his mouth with his forearm.

He didn’t seem to have a follow up reason as to why he wanted you to stay but you do anyway. It was still a concern of yours that he stayed hydrated but you would tuck the thought aside momentarily to appease him.

“Okay, what do you need?”

Finally, he relaxes, his stomach seemingly empty now as he sits back against the wall. A sigh leaves his lips, relief slipping off of them as he gazes up at the ceiling. Shutting his eyes, he shows no indication of responding anytime soon, his pale face exhausted. Sitting down beside him was your best bet, that way if he did decide that he needed to spill his guts again, you were there to assist. And it was especially comforting to sit there just in case he passed out since he was at risk of hitting his head against something. He was obviously still out of it, sobriety seeping in very slowly, the room more than likely spinning from his perspective.

“Dizzy?” You ask.

“Mhm.” He hums, squeezing his eyes shut as if it would aid in steadying the room.

“You need water.”

“Mm.” He disagrees, shaking his head.

“Yes, it’ll help with the dizziness…probably.” You tell him, standing up once again.

This time he doesn’t protest, the message sinking in. You do, however, worry what could happen in the seconds that you’re gone. But, you have no other options right now.

“Stay here—Eddie, stay here. Do you hear me? Don’t move.” You try to drill into his brain.

All he offers is a weak nod, unable to even open his eyes. Satisfied enough with the response, you speed out of the bathroom and down the stairs into the kitchen. It was easy enough to grab a cup and fill it with water, dodging the wasted party guests that had gathered around the counter to play some kind of drinking game.

“Hey, where did you run off to!” Jett calls over to you.

Carefully, carrying the cup of water as not to spill, you turn around to meet his cheerful face. He had clearly gotten into that weed stash as his eyes were even more bloodshot than Eddie’s and his face was the most relaxed you’d ever seen it. And he was a pretty laid back guy so that was saying something.

“Oh, uh, Eddie’s not feeling good so I was just helping him out.” You explain.

Jett offers a suspicious squint, eyes glimmering in mischief as he reaches for a cupcake.

“What?” You ask genuinely.

He shakes his head, sticking his hands up in surrender which only makes you question the strange boy further. What was going on in that hyperactive mind of his?

“Nothin’” He smirks, orange icing coating his upper lip.

You didn’t have time for him to elaborate, if you could even get him to. You just needed to get back upstairs, you had already been gone for a few seconds too long, worry burying in your gut like a parasite.

“Okay, I have to get back to Eddie and make sure he hasn’t done something stupid.”

“Mmmhmm.” Jett giggles.

If only you had the time to interrogate him and inquire as to why he found that so funny. But you didn’t. Leaving him behind to laugh to himself, you can just barely make out one last word as you turn on your heel.

“Lovebirds.”

Your eyes grow ten times bigger as you scurry away. Did he think that’s what this was? That you were on your way to hook up with your boss? Did it look that way to everyone else? Jett was going to rat you out for something you weren’t even doing, you were convinced. No matter how nice of a guy Jett proved he was, he was higher than a kite and could start up a rumor like wildfire if he relayed his suspicion to anyone. It’s possible you were being paranoid but come the morning, if there were rumors floating around, you knew exactly who to blame.

Trying to shake the butterflies you felt taking your stomach hostage, you concentrate on getting the water upstairs without spilling a drop. It was evident that you had filled the cup a tad too high, giving you even more of a challenge. As you conquer the stairs, you anxiously peer around the corner into the bathroom, hoping and praying that Eddie had listened and didn’t move an inch. Otherwise, you were on another goosechase for a six foot tall metalhead for the second time that night and respectfully, your organs wouldn’t be able to handle another spurt of anxiety like that.

Much to your relief, Eddie sits against the wall just as you had left him, eyes still shut tight and head bowed. He doesn’t seem to hear your sock covered feet padding into the bathroom, not one muscle twitching.

“Eddie.” You call, holding the water in front of him.

No answer.

“Eddie?” You say, more panicked.

Nothing.

“Okay, this isn’t funny, Eddie. C’mon, drink the water.” You tell him, gripping his chin as you examine him.

His eyes seem to flutter beneath his eyelids, brows furrowing as his head resists your hand and leans toward gravity. You continue to hold him up, giving his cheek a small pat. A deep groan escapes him although he’s still practically sleeping.

“Eddie.” Shaking his shoulders, he only moves like a rag doll in your hold. “Eddie, wake up.”

“Mmm.” He grumbles, swatting your hands away.

“Okay, I gotta take you home.” You decide, placing your hands on your hips, attempting to determine just how you were going to even get him into your car.

You couldn’t leave him here, he was still wasted. You could leave him with Donnie and everyone to look after him but what was the point if you were going to go home anyway and he lived right next to you? There was no use in making them babysitters if there was a more logical solution.

“‘M fine.” He says, curling up into a ball.

“No, Eddie, get up. Get up.” You try to be firm with him but he remains on the floor, comfy as ever with his hands tucked beneath his head. “Shit.” You sigh.

It was time to call in some reinforcements.

–

“Jesus Christ, he’s really fucked up isn’t he?” Jett stares down at the figure of a sleeping Eddie on the bathroom floor, perfectly content.

“Yeah, can you guys just carry him to my car and I can figure out the rest once I get home?” You plead.

Jett and Nathan share a look of concern to which you raise your eyebrows in confusion, expecting an explanation. They glance once more at Eddie’s sleeping body and then back up to you, appearing as if that had said everything though you were still lost.

“How are you…going to carry him out of the car?” Nathan asks, his bushy gray eyebrows knit in thought.

In all fairness, you didn’t think far enough into the future. If it were only you, you assume you would be required to drag his body across the yard and onto the porch before fishing out his keys and lugging him up onto his couch before leaving some water next to him and dismissing yourself. The affair may take you over an hour considering Eddie was proving to be a stubborn drunk. But you’d surely manage if it had to be done.

“I dunno, I’ll work something out.” You tell him.

Nathan glances over to Jett once more, concerned expression only deepening as he peers back down at Eddie. Jett shrugs, surrendering the decision to both of you.

“How ‘bout this.” Nathan starts. “We’ll follow you home and help you get him situated–”

“God, ‘m up! ‘M up, okay!” Eddie takes the three of you by surprise as he rapidly pushes off the floor and begins standing on wobbly legs.

“You sure about that?” Jett teases while Eddie stabilizes himself against the sink.

“Fuck off.”

Eddie’s aggravated demeanor persists once again, a pathetic puppy dog pout at his lips while his eyes become overshadowed by eyebrows, a stern scowl forming. If it was meant to intimidate anyone, he was sadly mistaken. Instead, Jett snickers behind his hand, attempting to hide his grin.

“I’m kidding, I’m just kidding.” Jett continues to chuckle, avoiding Eddie’s harsh gaze.

“What is goin’ on here?” Donnie emerges from the stairs.

“Christ, ‘s go.” Eddie murmurs, rolling his eyes.

Donnie’s face contorts in confusion at his attitude, something that if it were directed towards you, you wouldn’t think twice about. It was no secret that his moodiness carried over even when he was intoxicated. But you suppose she has a motherly hold on him and should he act up, she wasn’t afraid to confront him. It didn’t matter how much taller or how grown of a man he was, she wouldn’t hesitate to pinch him by the ear and drag him off to give him a lesson in manners.

Obediently, Eddie backs down, his expression instantly relaxing. His scowl is replaced with a blank face, any negative thoughts seeming to fall right out of his head.

“You’re leavin’?” Donnie questions.

Rather than answering, Eddie shifts his gaze to you expectantly. Like you were suddenly his keeper. It was odd, going from being absolutely repulsive in his eyes when you’d first met him, to him essentially submitting to you so willingly. He was wasted but it was still something you fondly tucked into the back of your mind to remember later, like a little postcard for yourself.

“I, uh, yeah. I was just heading out and I thought…since we’re neighbors…” You try to elaborate, only feeling as if you were digging yourself into a deeper hole as you remember Jett’s comment from earlier.

Low and behold, the brief glance you offer Jett only confirms it, a huge smirk displayed on his face just for you. It was enough for the blood to rush into your cheeks, practically sizzling to the touch.

“You just got here.” Donnie complains.

Jett puffs out his cheeks, offering some kind of communication that has Donnie reeling back on her previous statement.

“It is late though and if he’s really not feeling good…” She reasons.

You weren’t stupid and you knew Jett was assuming the position of a wingman and somehow, he was able to convey that to Donnie in just one simple look. And she ran with it, much to your surprise. Eddie seemed to check out of any conversation, bags hanging underneath his eyes while they drooped in boredom, his tall frame leaning against the wall as he toyed with the chain attached to his jeans.

Externally, you were irked, irritation written all over your face, even a hint of disgust could be found within your features. But internally, you were having quite the opposite reaction. Those damn butterflies had started up again, whirling around in your stomach so intensely, you were beginning to think they were bees. Your heart pounded in your ears, the tips of them becoming embarrassingly red and hot. You didn’t know why, maybe it was the prospect of everyone else thinking you had some secret relationship going on or even a little fling and the fact that they seemed to be rooting for you. It ignited the tiniest bit of excitement in you, you weren’t going to lie to yourself. Even if there was truly nothing going on.

Within minutes, you had an entourage escorting you to your car, Nathan insisting that it was no issue if you’d rather him drive Eddie just in case he were to pass out again. Though you were grateful, you didn’t see the trouble in making him drive all the way out to your street only to turn around and go right back to the party. If Eddie passed out again, you’d splash some water on him and surely figure out a way to wake him. Besides, he had started to become more alert since stumbling down the stairs and making the walk down the steep driveway. Of course, you also required that he down some water before leaving, otherwise he could stay and let his friends have their fun and tease him about sleeping in front of the toilet, which he didn’t seem to like as he scrunched his face and grabbed the water from you.

Donnie had advised you to drive safely several times while Jett continued to poke fun at Eddie, only earning himself a sock to the shoulder. Jett may not feel it now but in the morning there would be a good chance he’d have a nice purple bruise.

At some point after you had stepped outside, a jacket was draped over your shivering shoulders. Eddie’s jacket. And seconds later, he walked ahead of you with his hands shoved in his pockets, no doubt trying to escape Jett’s teasing. It was in that moment, surrounded by people who seemed to just…care, that you began to feel wanted. While Donnie talked your ear off about keeping an eye out for deer, Nathan continuing to even offer to drive both of you home, assuring you that he didn’t mind in the slightest. Eddie resting his jacket over your shoulders, even in his current state, and Jett…well Jett was being Jett but he still contributed to the warm and fuzzy feelings you were experiencing.

It felt a lot like…family.

–

The cold glass soothes Eddie’s sweaty cheek, the surface fogging up with every breath as his finger taps away to a beat in his head on the center console. The slumped position he had been in for the past five minutes was sure to awaken a few aches and pains in his spine but he didn’t budge. The radio softly sounded through the car, some random pop song he could hardly make out. His eyes followed tree after tree, nearly causing him to go cross-eyed as he kept up with the little game he made up in his head, counting each tree. Sometimes he would get distracted by the pavement zooming by before continuing.

Not a word had been shared between you since the bathroom though it was an oddly comfortable silence. It didn’t feel like you had to speak or fill in the gaps like you usually would, desperately clinging to words that you didn’t have in order to appease the other person. The fact that Eddie was coming out of his drunken haze could have something to do with it but had it not been Eddie you were driving, you’re certain you would struggle to strike up a conversation as if it were required.

Glancing over at him, you can’t help but feel a small smile tug at your lips, his fingers drawing a smiley face into the fog he created with his breath. You’d never seen him so content but perhaps you shouldn’t look too much into it. A few beers and some weed would have that effect on anyone. It was just pleasant to see him so laid back, the stressors of his life set aside for another time. You could only hope he could appear the same way sober someday soon.

“Where’s your family?” Eddie suddenly mumbles, eyes still glued to the scenery outside.

The question is out of the blue and the last thing you would expect from him. Although he had taken somewhat of a liking to you, he’d never taken an interest in something so personal. And you offered him that same respect.

“What?” You ask, sneaking a glance at him, your hands squeezing the wheel.

His focus shifts from the window to you, his body turning inward as he leans his cheek against the headrest, waiting for your response. The way his lips pucker from his cheek squishing against the seat only makes your heart clench. His large awaiting eyes reflect the moon and you find it hard to change the subject when they appear so patient and attentive.

“Um, well, they’re back in…back home.” You answer simply.

“Where’s that?”

He looked the most inquisitive you’d seen him, body turned toward you, his attention not once wavering. Instead of the usual knit brows he often wore, his features remained softer and full of wonder. Lips parted and eyes twinkling, who were you to deny his efforts? Even if he was slightly under the influence. Worst case scenario, he doesn’t remember this conversation.

“California.”

“Oh.”

You didn’t know what kind of response you were expecting but for some reason, the one word was a bit too vague, self consciousness kicking in.

“What about yours?” You shift the spotlight over to him.

From what you can tell as you keep your focus on the road, his gaze drops while he collects his thoughts, his breathing going shaky for just a second before he regains his composure. A hum deep in his throat notifies you that he’s ready to begin speaking again.

“Uh, don’t really have one. Never really have. Or, uh, I just don’t remember them? Other than my uncle, Wayne. He’s back…” Eddie hesitates. “He’s in Indiana.”

“I’m sorry—I didn’t know…” You start to backtrack and although he was the one who initiated the conversation, maybe it was too bold of you to reverse the question.

“No, ‘s okay.” He assures you, shaking his head, his curls flattening against the seat.

“You miss him?”

The car is silent again, aside from the radio playing quietly. You fear you’ve said the wrong thing, struck some kind of a nerve that forced him to go mute. No longer wanting to engage in the topic. But when you peer over at him again briefly, he’s biting his lip, getting lost in his mind again before he decides on an answer.

“Yeah. Yeah, I do. He visits when he can.” A sadness lurks beneath the surface of his monotone response, eyes growing shinier in the moonlight. And then he wipes the slate clean, face devoid of emotion once again as he seems to shake his previous thoughts from his head. “So what’s your deal? What made you come all the way out here?”

This is the part where you would shrug and offer no further insight into the corners of your mind that usually were kept isolated. But when his gaze softens from the passenger seat like that–like he wants to know, like he cares, you wanted to give him the key to your contaminated brain and let him poke around all he wanted. As long as he wanted.

“Well, uh, I love my family...” You start, voice timid. “But I was feeling super lost. And like I was living for everyone else. And when my dad passed months ago he left me his estate…left me everything…”

“I’m sorry.” He says, sympathy coating his words.

You nod, a silent thank you before continuing.

“So I split it up with my family…then moved away. Guess I wanted to…I dunno find myself?” You laugh, as if you’d just told a joke.

Rather than laugh along, Eddie studies you with intent. Like he’s searching for more, digging into your soul.

“Why’s that funny?” He asks.

“I just–I don’t know what I’m doing.” You laugh again.

“Well, neither do I.” He begins to chuckle. “I mean look at me.”

Progressively, you both start to laugh harder, glancing at each other and reveling in the failures that you both had endured up until this moment. It’s like you were slap happy, a snort threatening to escape you through your uncontrollable laughter.

“Ah, fuck.” Eddie exhales, a grin plastered to his face. “Bar is going to shit, my government hush money has run out–”

“Your what?” You question, amusement taking over your features.

“Nothing.”

Suddenly, he has no desire to converse, his lips shut in a tight line as he once again turns his attention to the window.

“Government hush money?” You repeat.

With a roll of his eyes and a deep breath, you can tell he contemplates carefully as he chooses his next words.

“Jesus Christ, I’m really not supposed to talk about it.” He breathes, pinching the bridge of his nose. “But, fuck it I guess.” He drops his hand from his face.

Pulling into your driveway, the gravel crunches under the tires before you kill the engine, headlights leaving you in the darkness. Eddie has your full focus, your body turned toward him as you pull a knee up to your chest, resting your chin on top.

“You don’t have to.” You assure. “I can just forget you ever said anything–”

“Honestly, it’ll probably do me some good to get it off my chest.” He interrupts.

At his insistence, you keep quiet, waiting for him to continue. He fidgets with his rings nervously, pulling them off and putting them back on.

“You, uh, you have to swear to never talk about it again. To anyone.”

“Promise.” You whisper, sticking your pinky out.

A puzzled look crosses his face, looking from your pinky to you in uncertainty. It was becoming apparent that he was sobering up, laziness no longer taking a hold of his eyelids and words coherent.

“Pinky promise.” You smile.

“Pinky promise?” He still appears confused.

“Yeah, you never made a pinky promise before?”

A small smile forces the corners of his mouth up, eyes shining with entertainment as he stares at your pinky. Shaking his head, he rests his hands in his lap, almost bashfully. A contrast to his usual prickly tendencies and forward personality.

“Well, I take pinky promises very seriously. They can’t be broken. So I pinky promise, I won’t mention this ever again.” You stick your hand even further forward, awaiting his pinky.

“Yeah?” He asks with a lopsided grin. “How do I know you mean that?”

“It’s a pinky promise, Eddie.” You deadpan, as if he was supposed to know how eternally binding it was.

A few seconds pass, Eddie still looking from you to your pinky with round eyes, soft at the edges with something that resembles the innocence of a little boy. His inner child was sparkling, pouring from him like a forbidden fountain that only you had the honor of witnessing. When his pinky wraps around yours, his comically larger than yours, you can’t fight the way your heart flutters in response to the touch. His warmth encompassing yours, melting together like the sweetest chocolate.

Then, once your pinkies part, he speaks of a horrifying earthquake, striking his home town and wreaking havoc on the innocent lives once lived. He tells you of things that you would never in this lifetime believe, things that he was forced to believe within seconds, creatures that attacked him, putting him on his deathbed only to be revived and put in the hospital for weeks. Of the horrifying manhunt for him, how he was a wanted man for things he was never responsible for, conveniently at the peak of satanic panic. How he was blamed for being in the wrong place at the wrong time, how the whole town pinned a murder on him. How there are things he could never even begin to explain like how Chrissy, the head cheerleader at his highschool had died right in front of him. And how she was the first girl he was actually interested in, only for her to die a horrific death before his eyes. He didn’t go into detail, though you didn’t need him to. You didn’t want him to re-live such trauma just to provide you further explanation.

Once all was said and done, once he was out of the hospital, he was arrested and sat in jail for a week or so, he couldn’t recall exactly how long. His uncle trying everything, doing everything he could to bail him out but he didn’t come from money so that proved to fail, especially since no one was on his side, even a majority of the police. He told you of Dustin and Lucas…of Max, Erika, Steve, Nancy, and Robin. The people that had always been on his side even when he was the only suspect for murder. The people he missed so dearly every day but could only see every so often when they could find time to visit. Which they did. He only wished he could go back home. If he did, it would only spark up another riot and it was against his agreement with the government to even step foot in the state of Indiana.

So when he was bailed out of jail, his friends all awaiting him just outside the station, it was bittersweet. He was relieved that he wouldn’t be stuck in that hell hole for the rest of his life like his dad but he was terrified of leaving everything he’d ever known. It was his dream to someday get out of that place, a place that he wouldn’t name which was most likely due to his agreement. But the second he was forced to leave, he didn’t know what was next for him, a terrifying concept for any smalltown boy at the fresh age of 20.

Wayne had intervened, making plans for Eddie to move in with his grandfather, Roy out in the middle of the mountains a few states away rather than being shipped somewhere where he had no connections, a setup for failure. Eddie told you about how he didn’t know his grandpa his entire life, didn’t even know he still had one until he went to live with him. But without any hesitation, Roy took him under his wing, stating that it's what his daughter, Eddie’s mother would’ve wanted him to do. The least he could do for a boy who only knew broken family and lost his beloved mother so young.

You learn that his grandfather had distanced himself due to Eddie’s dad and truthfully didn’t know of Eddie’s existence until Wayne made that phone call. The moment he found out he had a grandson, he welcomed him with open arms and put him to work at the bar, giving him a kind of security that Eddie had never been familiar with in his life. Grandpa Roy died last year of kidney failure, leaving Eddie everything and you could tell it was really taking a toll on him, the responsibility of the bar, the fear of losing it and disappointing his grandfather.

It seems that within the span of ten minutes, you learn Eddie’s life story. From the incident back in Indiana to how his dad created destruction in his life long before that and how he would teach Eddie how to commit petty theft and hotwire cars. He was on the route to becoming just like his dad before Wayne got involved, fighting like hell for legal custody of him. His dad refused time and time again although Eddie spent most nights and days at Wayne’s trailer anyway. Wayne didn’t want him to have any authority over Eddie, the man was a criminal and an addict that would leave poor young Eddie alone for days to fend for himself until he decided to come back. He didn’t want that life for Eddie.

Eventually, he won, the courts taking far too long to review the case but he was granted full custody and not long after, Eddie’s dad was arrested for grand theft auto. He still rots in jail to this day for several other crimes he committed once he got out the first time.

It was all laid out for you, Eddie’s entire upbringing. His whole life on display for you to judge if you felt so inclined to. You didn’t. You sat and you processed. Deciphering that Eddie is the way he is because of the way he had been treated his entire life. An outcast among the working class, growing up in poverty and being made fun of for things out of his control. Kids steering clear from him for the simple fact that he was his father’s son and that his name had already been tarnished before he was even born. It was becoming clear as to why Eddie was so emotionally withdrawn. How could he not be?

“Eddie I–” “If you say you’re sorry I’ll puke again.” He jokes.

It was something you found so endearing within him, his ability to remain playful even when addressing his trauma. Perhaps it was a coping mechanism. You could relate if it was.

“Let’s just, uh, call it a night. I think that’s enough about me. I don’t wanna talk about me anymore.” He shakes his head, exhausted but still displaying a playful smile.

“Okay. Yeah.” You agree, opening the door before he stops you with a raise of his hand.

“Would this…would this be a bad time to tell you that I’m ninety nine percent sure that I left my keys at the party?” He squeezes his eyes shut.

“Wow.” You sigh, resting your head on the steering wheel. “Look at how the tables have turned.” You grin, shoving his shoulder, eliciting a grunt from him.

“Gonna make me sleep on the porch with the bears?” He half jokes. He wouldn’t blame you.

“Only if you don’t puke on me like I did to you.”

Eddie can’t fight his grin, dimples deepening. He’s thankful that it’s too dark to make out the pink tinting his cheeks.

~end~

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tags - @gravedigginbbydoll @ohauggieo @spicysix @lunatictardis @ali-r3n @batkin028 @mrsjellymunson @witchwolflea @emma77645 @emxxblog @eddiesxangel @angietherose @lottie-90 @sheneedsrocknroll92 @pullingattheroots @avalon-wolf @vintagehellfire @cryingglightningg @foreveranexpatsposts @winchester-angel @mmunson86 @witchwolflea @kurdtbean @micheledawn1975 @tlclick73 @erinekc @hazydespair @whenshelanded @corrodedcoffincumslut @ms1oftheboys @lma1986 @uglypastels

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marzipanandminutiae · 11 months ago

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Rating the Femme en Noir Crimson Peak collection when I should be going to bed (it's not ALL critical, actually!)

no judgment at all to people who like the collection. nothing can achieve higher than a 7/10 because it's all synthetic. let's get into it

Edith Victorian Gown in Ivory

...yeah! that's basically Edith's nightgown copied exactly, so it's a 7/10 from me

2. Lady Lucille Victorian Dress With Capelet In Teal

What. um. What does this have to do with anything Lucille wears? It's blue velvet and it's a dress; there the similarities end. Why is there a ruffly capelet? That's something Edith wears, not Lucille. Why are there leg-o-mutton sleeves? Why is there no trim whatsoever? (that last is to become a running theme.) 3/10.

3. Allerdale Moth Wallpaper Babydoll Dress in Olive

There's a longer version, and were it a natural fabric, I'd be tempted to buy it and alter it into a blouse and over-skirt or something. This one is honestly pretty cute, though I forget what part of the house this wallpaper appears in. 7/10.

4. Edith Victorian Knit Cardigan in Olive

I get that they want to modernize these things for their target audience, but the original being SO much more fitted and sumptuous-looking just makes this one look sad. It's like Wish.com Edith. 5/10 for at least keeping the little velvet pumpkins.

5. Ghost Shoulder Bag

If this were leather, I would buy it. Not a huge fan of Margaret being the ghost on the front, though- I feel like Enola or Eleanor would be more photogenic. Poor Margaret. 6/10 though they're lucky I don't take points off for calling it "vegan leather" in the description. Be honest- it's plastic.

6. Belladonna Maxi Dress in Crimson Red

This is just an existing product of theirs But In Red. Pretty, but 4/10 for lack of effort.

7. Lady Mourning Victorian Gown in Black

It's the nightgown in black with a sash. Try harder. 3/10 and I'm skipping any color repeats labeled as different dresses from here on out.

8. Mourning Victorian Bonnet in Black

You know what? Yeah. Sure! That's a cute bonnet. Good job. 7/10.

9. Lace Mourning Scarf Veil in Black.

You can get a yard of nylon chantilly lace for less than $28, pretty as this looks. 5/10.

10. Victorian Cycling Pullover Sweater in Black

I mean. I guess. What does this have to do with Crimson Peak, exactly? Why is "Lucille" wearing puffed sleeves when, again, her clothing being tight has so much character logic behind it? It's a mystery. 5/10.

11. Victorian Velvet Bustle Skirt in Black

This didn't photograph well, but it appears to have some cool pleat details. I don't like 19th-century skirts getting shortened, but that's more a matter of personal preference than reaction to movie inspiration or lack thereof. 6/10.

12. Taffeta Edwardian Blouse in Marigold

This comes in multiple colors, but I picked the marigold because it illustrates that Wish.com effect once again.

The OG bodice from the movie that they're clearly trying to evoke. It has DETAIL! it has TRIM! It has LUSH FABRIC! And obviously you can't do that with a mass-produced piece, but ye gods, why would you set yourself up for failure by trying? If they hadn't gone for the look of a specific movie costume, their blouse wouldn't look disappointing by comparison. 5/10

13. Wicker Tilt Hat With Black Veil

Once again I feel they shot themselves in the foot here. It's cute! But it suffers by trying to be something that was better in the movie.

Not great by comparison; it's TOO close without going all the way. 6/10 because it is cute, though.

[skipped a bunch more veils and some lace mitts, which were cute but have nothing to do with How Well Or Poorly The CPeak Inspiration Was Executed In My Opinion]

14. Victorian Hands Belt in Silver

THIS IS NOT THE CRIMSON PEAK HAND BELT. THIS IS NOT EVEN TRYING TO BE THE CRIMSON PEAK HAND BELT. DO YOU KNOW WHAT THIS IS?

IT IS THIS 1970S BELT- WHICH, LIKE THE ONE IN THE MOVIE, IS NOT BASED ON ANY VICTORIAN ORIGINAL THAT I'M AWARE OF -THAT HAS BEEN COPIED 50000 TIMES. DO YOURSELF A FAVOR AND WAIT FOR CUTTLE AND BONE TO HAVE ANOTHER PREORDER OF ACTUAL CPEAK HAND BELTS. 0/10.

Conclusion: Not all bad, but I feel like I actually would have gone in a more modern direction with the resources and limitations of this collection. You're never going to be as good as the movie costumes at their own game, not with mass-manufactured pieces. So why set yourself up for failure? Bringing the characters, themes, and motifs to a yet-unexplored time and place (with some Victwardian touches, of course!) seems like it would have been a better way to go about this, IMO.

Also stop being allergic to trim when you're taking inspiration from a movie with oodles of passementerie and beadwork and lace all over everything.

5/10 overall.

#long post #fashion #crimson peak #also for the love of everything can we get some natural-fiber clothes that AREN'T beige linen?#Gothic Natural Fiber Attire When!!!

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absolutebl · 10 months ago

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This Week in BL - The Sign is Slaying

Organized, in each category, with ones I'm enjoying most at the top. Happy new year, BLabies!

Jan 2024 Wk 2

Ongoing Series - Thai

The Sign (Sat YT) ep 8 of 12 - Tharn in Phaya’s too big clothing is the cutest thing in the world.

I gotta to say something about Babe's acting really quickly. I love the way he’s inhabiting the personality of his naga character with reptilian eye and body movements and (I don’t know how to put this) a certain reserved, elegant, slithering- ness. He's very good this new boy of ours. (He come from something physical like dance?)

I adored them doing the walk of shame and being teased.

ALSO I enjoyed the way they handled Tharn’s gender in the past with his costume (the pha chung hang is gender neutral but that green top is a kinda combo m+f) and pronouns et al.

Language corner:

They are using ancient pronouns. I *think* I heard: daow (3rd), khun/jao/tan (2nd), kaa (Ist) - all pronouns in use are gender neutral - to the best of my understanding.

Last Twilight (Fri YT) ep 10 of 12 - Ooo. Day comes out to fam. Also his maa legit took his phone away and said

“I don’t mind you being gay but you can’t date a poor.”

Still, these 2 do kind of make the best secret boyfriends ever.

Also I begin to love Night: “that’s my baby” indeed. You special ain’t ya?

For Him (Thurs iQIYI) ep 7 of 12 - I’m starting to find this pretty boring at this juncture. Bummer, because for a while I was enjoying it.

Twins the series (Fri GaGa) ep 11 of 12 - The stuff with the spy on the team is super boring. I’m not wild about the side characters either. So most of this episode was a bust for me. I did like First’s ex.

Pit Babe (Fri iQIYI) ep 9 of 14 - Charlie & Babe = honeymoon phase. Jeff & Kim = forgotten. Pete & Way = riddles wrapped in alphas but actually enigmas. Everyone else = gang bang phase…. Apparently. Trash watch happening here.

Cooking Crush (Sun YT) ep 6 of 12 - Loved that this was a mutual kiss. (Also how comfortable are OffGunn kissing now? Babies!) I’ve moved from indifference to absolute loathing of the side couple tho.

Oddball LIES from the script = the gayest bridge in Bangkok isn’t lit up after 9pm.

Meanwhile, very important kicky kicky feet and Doc is a dork about flirting now that he’s all in. Looks like we get the official boyfriend ep next week.

You and My Stars YT 2of 2(?) - Couldn’t find it. Not fussed.

Time the series (Thai Gaga) ep 1 of 10 - Okay so there’s a gang and someone named Chris is killed and his boyfriend, actor Foam, is jumped back in time to save him? NO SINGING. Between Chris’s death and that time-slip there’s some kind of accidental murder, a pink pocket watch, Chris being alive again but also a different person, and a make out scene. Are you also confused? Actually, the real question is: Do we continue watching? Remember we (the collective BLorg) do not trust MFlow.

My Universe (Sun iQIYI) ep 21 of 24 - The acting has been pretty terrible all along with this series, but this one is the worst. I just can’t. I may tune in for the last installment but this one is a DNF for me.

Ongoing Series - Not Thai

Although I Love You and You AKA Sukiyanen Kedo Do Yaro ka (Japan Gaga) ep 1 of 10 - It’s utterly adorable. Very manga, but so far not grating on my nerves. They so cute! You know I adore a hyung romance. Add a v gay sauna scene and an OUT gay boy and just... YES. All the married breeder regulars being overly invested in their pretty cook’s queer drama queening, it's so good.

AND THEN a confession in the first episode? Japan sure loves to mess with the pacing of plots drops.

Also, how much do I want to eat every single piece of food in this darn show?

Sahara-sensei to Toki-kun (Japan Fri Gaga) ep 5 of 8 - Man I wish this were better I enjoyed this more. Sigh. I do LOVE the stepbrother sides. Of course I do. But how can this feature 2 of my favorite relationship types (age gap, stepbrothers) and not be my favorite BL airing? Japan, how do you ALWAYS do this to me?

VIP Only (Taiwan Fri Gaga) ep 9 of 10 - I don’t know. I just wish this were better. Also shorter.

I really miss KBL right now.

It's done I Need to Catch up

What Did You Eat Yesterday Season 2 AKA Kinou Nani Tabeta? Season 2 (Japan Gaga) 10 eps - will binge when I have a spare day.

The Servant and the Young Master - from Veitnam so I assume it's on YouTube. I never even noticed. Anyone?

After Sundown - aired on Netflix Thailand. No word on inter release.

It's Airing But...

[INTERNATIONAL] Cherry Magic (Sat YouTube) ep 3 of 12 - yeah Japan put the smack down on our boys. Sadness. You can use a VPN if you like. Read all about it here.

Ossans Love Season 2 (Japan Gaga) - 5 years later, will anything have changed? This is Japan so… probubly not. I won't be watching this. I disliked Season one and actively hated the follow ups. No thank you.

Playboyy (Thurs Gaga) 14 eps - Dear Playboyy, it's not you, it’s me… I hate you. You’re about as deep (and as palatable) as a shot glass of cum. While I'm sure you’re someone’s kink, you're my weakest link. Goodbye. I DNFed this at ep 5. Frankly I'm impressed with myself for getting that far.

Night Dream (Sat YT) 6 eps - It’s a pain to track down and I really didn’t like the first episode so… DNF

The Whisperer (Sun ????) 10 eps - Thai horror BL that ALSO involves cheating (what joy is mine). I don't think even the perfect single dimple can motivate me to watch. Word is... it's terrible.

7 Days Before Valentine (Weds WeTV) 10 eps - Giving me Luminous Solution vibes. I'm waiting to binge if safe.

Dead Friend Forever (Thai Sat iQIYI) - horror, meh, tell me if it's worth my time?

In Case You Missed it

All my year-end round ups:

TOP 10 BL Trends of 2023

Top 10 BL Secondary Pairs of 2023

2023 BLs Best Trope Execution Awards! TOP 10

BL 2023's Best:

Back Hugs Thailand & Elsewhere

Cute Bits of Domesticity

Boys Feeding Boys

BOOP!

Best Cuddles

Heads in Laps

Touching Head Touches

Thailand Put His Head on Your Shoulder

Put Your Head on My Shoulder (not Thailand)

BEST KISSES (not Thailand)

BEST KISSES FROM THAILAND

All the BLs Announced for 2023 that didn't happen

Next Week Looks Like This

More Coming Jan 2024

Beside You (Thai YouTube)

1/24 Love For Love's Sake (Korea Gaga)- based on the Manhwa ‘Love Supremacy Zone’ by Hwacha. A young man is dropped into a game based off a novel he loves. His mission is to make another player, YeoWoon happy. But then the game starts unfolding completely different from the novel.

Upcoming BLs for 2024 are listed here. This list is not kept updated, so please leave a comment if you know something new or RP with additions.

THIS WEEK’S BEST MOMENTS

Why are the oversized flappy flappy sleeves so adorable? (The Sign)

Pit Babe

Frankly 2024 is starting on a whimper... mostly from Babe.

(Last week)

#the sign is great #last twilight is great too #that's kinda it #that's what great #thai bl #The Sign the series #Last Twilight #this week in bl #bl updates #Japanese BL #best bl 2023 round ups #Although I Love You and You #Sukiyanen Kedo Do Yaro ka #tainwanese bl #Pit Babe

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sanjisboyfie · 1 year ago

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๑ keep safe : his hand on his ankle (12)

one piece x male reader

i think we're like fire and water.

i think we're like the wind and sea.

you're burnin' up

and i'm coolin' down

『 prev 』

“oi, pervy cook, stop harassing women!” [name] shouted from across the market stalls, “look this guy has a good deal, give me the bag of beri nami gave you!!”

sanji’s eyebrow quirked up in annoyance, new angry tick marks spawning all over his forehead as well. due to [name]’s shouts, the two beautiful women in front of him ran off.

he didn’t pick up on the fact they just ran away from sanji as a person, not because of [name].

grumbling under his breath about skewering [name] alive, he walked over to the stall and looked at their selection of ingredients. pretty quickly, sanji got over his anger and began bargaining with the sales rep.

[name] looked around as sanji took care of collecting all the ingredients, sighing as he felt himself grow immensely hot at the island’s weather. he had already stripped off his shirt, now donning a pair of knee length shorts while his torso was exposed.

he should get some more breathable clothing soon because the looks the townspeople were giving him were obviously laced with disapproval.

“i really can’t take you anywhere, your manners are nonexistent,” sanji said, backtracking to how [name] yelled earlier.

“they weren’t gonna get with you anyway,” [name] teased, throwing an arm around sanji’s shoulder. sanji easily shrugged the heavy limb off, scowling as [name] got too up close and personal.

the two continued on shopping and as soon as things began piling up, [name] looked around in wonder, “where’s chopper?” he asked, mentally hoping that the chef kept an eye on their newest crewmate.

“ah, i thought he was with you?” sanji said mindlessly, browsing through more selections of clothing for nami and vivi.

“hm, he probably is fine- hey! sanji, don’t buy those clothes, that’s not appropriate attire for the desert, idiot,” [name] said, slapping sanji in the head to rid him of his sudden heart eyes.

the blonde was looking at a beautiful piece of clothing that was definitely not actually made for the desert heat. “get them something more…not flashy,”

“flashy is the best!” sanji cried out, making [name] slap him on the head once more.

“idiot!”

[name] took care of buying actual clothing for the women, and the men — since sanji definitely wouldn’t care about them enough to spend beri on them, and made sure he snagged the whole bag of beri away from sanji. he didn’t need the chef wasting any more money on useless things.

after what felt like hours of shopping, the two rejoined with their group that was in hiding.

“huh? where’s chopper?” nami asked, noticing their missing reindeer.

“well, we don’t know, but!!! before you hit me, he’ll be able to find us with that strong nose of his, if anything we just lost him in the crowd,” [name] said, not really putting nami at ease, but it did stop her from hitting him on the head.

sanji quickly threw food at zoro and usopp, who jumped at it to ravenously eat it since they were starving. then he politely handed the share to vivi and nami. lastly, he didn’t even think twice in throwing a skewer at [name] — who easily swallowed it in one second.

“at least savor it, [name],” vivi said, worried as she saw [name] spit out the wooden stick that went through the meat skewer without a care in the world.

“i did savor it, your country’s food is yummy, vivi,” [name] approved, a thumbs up given to the princess who could only hum in delight.

“and, nami-san and vivi-chan, please put on the gowns i bought you!” sanji said, once again love struck as he spun his way over to nami and vivi. at that cue, [name] rummaged through their newly bought goods and brought the actual clothes out.

he laid them out to zoro and usopp first, the two nodding quickly in thanks before going back to devouring their share of meat. and then he walked over to nami and vivi, giving them an apologetic smile.

“here's some more clothes if you want to change into this instead,” vivi didn’t seem to hesitate in grabbing the cloths. she saved him a thankful look, patting him on the head as well. nami kept sanji’s choice of clothing, telling [name] to put the other robes into the bag for safe keeping in case.

everyone changed into their new outfits, [name] gagging as he felt it become even more suffocating with the layers he put on. the moment he emerged from behind the wall where he was changing, they all stopped and stared at him.

“does it really look that bad? because i feel like shit right now,” he said, not thinking much of their stares.

and there was nothing to make of it anyway as they all erupted with their own comments.

“yeah, you fit the part of a bandit,” sanji insulted, taking a drag of his cigarette.

”don’t have such a pathetic look on your face, [name], it makes you seriously look miserable,” nami advised, sweatdropping as [name] dropped in front of them in exhaustion from the heat.

“you’re gonna eat shit in the desert, aren’t you?! haha!!” zoro laughed at [name]’s personal hell.

“come on, [name], get serious! you need to be in tip-top shape in order to protect us, this isn’t a joke!!!” usopp cried, shaking [name] back and forth by his collar.

meanwhile, [name] was slumped over right next to chopper as they were both suffering immensely from the heat.

“[name], are you going to be alright? you look really, really…” vivi trailed off, seeing the sweat that was practically soaking into [name]’s headpiece. “hot.”

“i’m terrible with hot weather! first we go to drum island, as fucking cold as it was, then we end up in the middle of the desert! i might as well jump into a boiling tub of hot water!” [name] shouted, kicking into the sand in frustration, “i can’t deal with this!”

“you’re awfully affected by the weather, just make sure you pack some water,” nami huffed, shrugging her shoulders, “or take off a couple of layers.”

[name] easily did as told, eager to get the suffocating clothes off of his person. he kept the headpiece on, tying the arms of the robe around his waist to leave his torso bare. he threw the sword over his person to rest on his back, breathing a sigh of relief.

with his muscular back and torso exposed, nami eyed him in interest. something had caught her eye on [name]’s back and she stopped him from moving around when she finally made out what it was.

”you have a tattoo, [name]?”

[name] turned around to look at his back, grinning when he saw the ink that permanently was etched into his skin.

“yeah, you like?”

it was a big tattoo, honestly. the crew was surprised they’d never seen it before. a pair of wings were running the expanse of [name]’s wide shoulders, going on until the ending tips of the wings were a little bit exposed to his deltoids.

“what’s it mean?” nami asked, gently trailing a finger over [name]’s inked skin, flinching back when she felt that the skin was slightly raised as well, “wait…what’s this?”

her hand flattened against [name]’s back, making sanji seethe where he stood, to get a better feel. [name] sighed in content feeling her cool palm cool him down, but then perked up at her actual question.

“what?”

“it’s like, you’ve got a map…of scars,” she breathed out, eyes widening in realization. just as she said, there were linear scars that were trailing over [name]’s back. she looked down and realized that they continued on until his hip, which was as far as her eye could see.

she abruptly turned him around, shock gracing her features as she saw that [name] was thoroughly scarred all over. the lines of his raised marks were very, very thin, and small. very precise work, it looked like.

but no doubt, it was there.

“how have we never seen?”

“well, they’re small, so it only really noticeable when you’re up close,”

in intrigue, usopp leaned in closer and was shocked to see that there really were marks all over [name]’s torso, “woah, they kind of look badass, how far do they go?”

“from my face, all the way down to my feet,” [name] said, shooting a look to chopper, as if a warning to not say anything. the reindeer dropped his head and obediently stayed quiet.

before nami could ask any more questions regarding the scarring, vivi abruptly asked about the tattoo on his back.

“so what is the significance of the tattoo?” she asked, feeling a sense of pressure put on [name] to explain the scarring that even made her uncomfortable. the marks themselves weren’t making her uncomfortable, but rather the incessant questions that [name] may not have wanted to answer.

nami and usopp probably didn’t mean for it to come off as invasive, but either way that was what it felt like, to vivi at least.

“to make me fly!” [name] childishly grinned. his smile was purely innocent, as if he truly believed he could. it was a smile that could easily mirror that of their captain. he looked so carefree as he referenced the large tattoo. and it was easy to miss the longing look in his eyes as he smiled, but a certain few picked up on it.

vivi smiled sadly at [name], sensing there was a deeper meaning to it than just that, but she left it alone. as did everyone else on the crew.

“sounds stupid, humans can’t fly idiot,” everyone besides zoro, as he was always eager to rile up [name]. and it worked as he knocked the swordsman on the head.

“but are you sure you want to walk around like that, [name]? the sun might get to you even more with your skin exposed,” vivi said worriedly, but [name] shot them down instantly.

“i’ll be fine,” [name] said, waving off the worries. “if anything, i’ll put the clothes back on if its really getting too much,”

“put them back on now, no one wants to see it,” sanji and zoro said in a monotonous voice, making another fight between the three of them break out. nami and usopp could only sigh at their antics, chopper watched on in admiration, and vivi couldn’t help but feel secure.

she had such strong people on her side.

well, she still had to ask them to assist her…she swallowed the lump in her throat, looking up with a fierce glint in her eyes.

“everyone, please, i want to save this country. and the journey is going to be treacherous, especially across the desert, there’s no saying what will happen. but, please!! if you could lend me your help, please!”

it was silent for a couple of seconds. nami was the one to break it with her mischievous giggle, “you finally said it! we were waiting for you, of course we’ll help you!”

[name] grinned along with her, throwing an arm around vivi’s shoulder, “you remember my promise, don’t you?” he asked, mindlessly leaning into her. she felt flustered at the close contact with the half naked [name] that her ears and cheeks started burning almost instantly.

sanji took care of her “problem” by kicking [name] down on the head. and with his foot still resting on top of [name]’s head, he grinned at vivi, trying to look charming, “of course, we will help you, vivi-chan! anything to help you my beautiful princess.”

“pervy cook,” [name] said in a strained voice in unison with zoro’s bored one.

“we gotta go through yuba first, right?” usopp checked, earning a hum of confirmation from [name] and nami.

chopper, despite feeling the heat most sensitively, was more than excited to see the vast desert.

everyone raised their marked arms into the air, ready to set themselves out for adventure. but then they all faltered as they realized they were missing someone…their captain.

“where the fuck is that idiot?!”

the only resolution they had to their missing captain issue was searching in the nearest town.

“i’m gonna go check the restaurant,” [name] said, his head held down. just as he was about to walk off, nami grabbed ahold of his ear.

“only to look for luffy!!! do not, i repeat do not!!!, go in there to eat for your own appetite. we have a whole country to save, [name]! don’t even think about getting distracted now!”

“i won’t, now let me go!” [name] whined, running in his spot as nami had a hold on his ear. when she finally let go, he mimicked a rocket taking off with how fast he made a beeline to the restaurant up ahead.

‘coffee!! meat!!! sorry, nami!!!’ he thought in his head as he ran into the restaurant. not waiting a second, he took a seat at the bar’s counter and got ready to be served.

“cup of coffee and three plates of meat, please!” [name] said, grinning from ear to ear at eating a proper meal. he had only eaten that one skewer sanji had secured for him, that piss blonde didn’t pity [name]’s endless stomach one bit!

“[name], we gotta stop meeting like this, it’s feeling a little bizarre,” a voice said from next to him.

[name] turned his head to the side, tears coming into his eyes as he recognized that grin from anywhere, “ace!!!”

he jumped out of his seat, completely tackling ace out from his seat. this landed them both on the floor. he peppered kisses all over ace’s face, whose cheeks dusted pink very quickly at the action, “my ace!!!”

“alright, alright, i get it,” ace said, holding onto [name]’s shoulders to push him back a little from his suffocating attitude. “i missed you too,”

[name] broke free from ace’s grip on his shoulder, leaning back down to press his forehead against ace’s, nudging the freckled nose with his own. even if he was already burning up from the climate outside, he couldn’t help but press himself further into ace’s warm chest.

“we saw each other a couple months ago, [name], get ahold of yourself!” ace said, tired of fighting against [name]’s need to be pressed against him. [name] was stubborn and didn’t let up his pushing at all.

“come on, ace, i never knew when i’d see you again!” [name] said, nuzzling into ace’s neck, a devious grin on his face, “i can be selfish on the affections,”

“i think you were plenty selfish last time we saw each other,” ace mumbled with red dusting his face.

the two got up, or rather, ace sat up and since [name] had all of his limbs wrapped around ace, he too came up with him. ace sat back down on the barstool, [name] sitting on his lap.

it was definitely a sight to see for everyone in the restaurant. [name] wasn’t some small guy, he was tall and imposing with his strong build. to see him so childishly (trying to) fit himself onto ace’s lap, who was significantly smaller than him, made the customers blink a couple of times to make sure they were seeing right.

”i can’t eat with you on me like this!”

“hm, i’ll just feed you,”

ace looked at him in annoyance, “that’s not my point, idiot,”

rolling his eyes, [name] propped himself up on the bar counter, off the side of ace so that the man could eat his food perfectly fine. [name] kept his legs resting in between ace’s, squeezing every now and then around ace’s thigh to keep the skinship.

“you’re oddly clingy,” ace grumbled, not flinching backwards when [name] pressed their faces close to one another again, “you act too young, man up a little,”

“i think we both know you wouldn’t prefer the cold shoulder, though,” [name] smirked, referencing the last time the duo had seen each other, “weren’t you the one who almost started crying when-”

ace shoved a spoonful of rice into [name]’s mouth, “shut up.”

[name] happily ate the food and grinned in utmost pleasure, “say, ace, join luffy’s crew!”

“no.”

“you always were so heartless,” [name] sighed.

“i think it’s obvious why i can’t join,” ace said, scarfing down more food. one of his hands wrapped around [name]’s ankle, the one that wasn’t in between his legs, and he squeezed it gently.

[name] looked up at the action, ace’s firm and warm grip around his foot knocking him out of his daydream. he was greeted by a smirk from the freckled man, “why don’t you join the whitebeard pirates? they’re more in your league anyway,”

“nope,” [name] grinned, putting his fingers in front of his face to form an ‘x’ shape.

“see, that’s what i thought,” ace said, rubbing his thumb up and down [name]’s ankle as he spoke. neither of them paid the action no mind. ace did it to reassure himself [name] was really in front of him and [name] always welcomed skinship with ace, so he definitely didn’t mind.

“well-”

then ace’s grip on his ankle became loose and a loud slamming onto the table made everyone in the restaurant look their way.

“he died mid-chew!?” they cried out, looking at the ravenette who collapsed.

[name] sighed, taking ace’s hat off and placing it on his own head. he buried his hand in ace’s hair, happily taking more food off of his plate and eating to his heart’s content.

“he doesn’t even care!!!”

“eh? he’s not dead,” [name] simply said, looking at the crowd as if they were crazy, “how’d you guys come up with that conclusion?”

“he obviously looks dead, don’t play dumb!” the crowd shouted in unison once more.

suddenly, ace shot up again, looking dazed. wordlessly, he snatched his plate back up from [name] and continued eating.

“he didn’t die?!”

“i told you he didn’t!”

“ah, [name], my hat looks good on you,” ace said cheerfully, a stunning smile on his face.

“ew, ace, you’ve got food in your mouth still,” [name] grimaced, “also around your entire face, hold on,”

[name] grabbed a stray napkin and wiped ace’s face clean, the man presenting himself prettily to [name]. that made him laugh, gently tap his cheek at his obvious posing, and ruffle his hair.

“all clean.”

“you’re so reliable [name], that’s why you should join old man’s crew,” ace said, once again slipping an invitation into the conversation.

“nope!”

ace’s warm hand went back to resting on [name]’s ankle, continuing to finish plate after plate.

”you two are bold to be eating out in the open like that,” a voice said behind ace, making [name] look up in interest.

he saw a man with two thick cigars resting on the corner of his mouth, eye twitching at the sight. the man continued on, “second division commander of the whitebeard pirates, portgas d. ace.” his eyes then trailed onto [name], looking even more angered, “and you, cursed orphan [name]. are you aware that your bounty had shot up?”

[name] sweatdropped, “but i didn’t even do anything,” he said in exasperation, nudging ace, “these guys hate me for no reason, i swear,” this made the freckled man burst out laughing.

“you’re a wanted man, a bounty of 250,000,000 million,” the man announced, making [name] pout, “that’s not even much higher,” and that was enough to send the entire place into an uproar.

“whitebeard pirates?! over 200 million bounty?!” they all shouted in fear and realization. these two men that were casually cuddling up with each other in the middle of the restaurant were fearless, deadly, and intimidating pirates.

“what are you two low lives doing in this country in the first place?”

as ace turned around, [name] leaned his entire body against ace’s, resting his chin on his shoulder. the two grinned devilishly, and the occupants in the restaurant genuinely did fear for their lives. the two answered easily, “i’m looking for my little brother / i’m here to kick some warlord’s ass,”

the marine, [name] assumed, flinched at their confessions, averting his eyes to [name], “you, what did you just say?”

[name] grinned proudly, twirling the ends of ace’s hair with his finger, “i’m gonna beat up some asshole,” he grinned, enjoying the confused look on the marine’s face and laughing in delight.

tension in the room seemed to only fill, almost at its brim.

“so? what do you want from me?” ace asked, biting back laughter as he felt [name] attach to his back as if he were a backpack. if [name] wasn’t sitting on the bar counter, ace would have had to uphold all the weight of him on his back. his legs were wrapped around his torso and his arms were lazily thrown over ace’s front.

[name]’s chin was resting on ace’s head, the orange hat still on top of his h/c hair.

the two looked so casual and comfortable, not to mention smug, for smoker’s liking.

“to capture the both of you quietly,”

“nope, i think i’ll pass. how about you, [name]?”

“i just said i have important business, marine man, i got places to be so no can do!”

“well, i figured,” he sighed, a puff of smoke trailing out of his mouth, “i’m busy trying to find another pirate at the moment. to be honest i have no interest in taking either of you in,”

[name] gave a thumbs up, “great, so leave us alone!”

”can’t,” the marine said in a strained voice, “so long as you’re a pirate and i’m a marine, i can’t let either of you out of my sights,” smoke began to erupt at a much faster pace, this time coming from his fist and [name] already knew that the man in front of him had some sort of devil fruit power.

“that sounded too much like a confession,” [name] hummed in disinterest, leaning into ace’s back even further.

“that’s a pretty bland reason,” ace said, hands turning into clenched fists, “don’t go threatening us, either. you should know - i like showing off in front of [name], so i won’t go easy on you,” ace leaned back a little, raising an eyebrow as he felt nothing but completely relaxed, “so let’s have some fun!”

[name] squinted, seeing past smoker and sensing something very, very, very rapidly approaching. unfortunately, his innate abilities weren’t even fast enough to dodge, so he only took a tight hold on ace, acting as the man’s human shield and braced for impact.

in a second, the front door of the restaurant welcomed a crashing figure — who was shouting about food. ace and smoker were knocked off of their feet, [name] as ace’s backpack, as the mystery person crashed into both of them.

[name] felt several walls break down behind him from the impact, making him grit his teeth in annoyance. he’d kill luffy for sure! moving the rubble surrounding them aside, [name] sat upright with a frown on his face.

“you alright, ace?”

“yeah, just pissed off, who the hell is causing all that trouble?”

”i think we both know the answer…” [name]’s voice trailed off as he stood up and began walking through the many holes his captain caused inside people’s homes and establishments.

as he walked ahead, he could only think of so many ways to make luffy understand he was dead meat.

as [name] and ace came to the restaurant, ace’s eyes widening as he realized who it was, they were about to rush forward, but were slapped down to the ground by the marine that was pestering them earlier.

“you’re fucking with me right now,” [name] cursed into the bricks he got a face full of, feeling nothing but annoyance seep into his bones. “i’ll kill the both of you bastards!”

“straw hat!!!” the marine called out, rushing forward and chasing luffy out of the restaurant.

in a second, luffy was running out of the place, followed by smoker, who was then followed by [name] and ace.

“wait, luffy! it’s me!!! wait up, luffy!!!” ace desperately shouted, running after luffy’s fast figure.

”luffy, come back here so i can kill your dumbass! i’ll send you flying!”

the chase happened for much longer than it needed, but eventually [name] caught up to his captain. and the first thing he did was sucker punch him. ace disconnected from him to stop smoker, who was very close to actually catching luffy.

when luffy finally got up from being punched, he looked up at the scene in wonder.

“ace?!”

“that’s what we’ve been trying to tell you, idiot, idiot, idiot!!” [name] said, knocking some more sense into his captain, “we’ve been running after you like mad men, don’t you have ears to listen!?”

“[name], i was running from that guy there, give me a break!” luffy whined, holding onto his head in fear of getting hit once more.

“luffy, you really never change, do you?” ace asked, smirking at the sight of his little brother and the crew he acquired.

“ace, did you eat a devil fruit?! you have powers now?!” luffy asked in astonishment.

“yep, the mera-mera no mi,” ace easily answered, the smirk on his face not going away for even a second as he stared at the marines ahead, “anyways, we can’t chat like this! i’ll catch up! you guys run!”

that was enough for [name], as he still wanted to knock some sense into luffy, who dragged their captain by his ear and ran off.

”aren’t you a bit too ready to run away from a fight?!” usopp shouted, never seeing [name] so eager to get away.

“come on, don’t fall behind now!!” [name] shouted, smirking at the still crew, “ace’s got it all handled, let’s run now!!!”

“is he an acquaintance of yours, luffy?! [name]?!”

luffy laughed happily, looking back at his crew with that notoriously troublesome smile, “yeah!! he’s my brother!”

the crew would’ve stopped running in shock, but seeing as the marines were hot on their tail they had no other option but to continue rushing forward. the looks on their faces said it all though.

they thought that learning [name] and luffy grew up on the same island was shocking, it still was, honestly but just now finding out luffy had a brother? and the fact luffy and [name] were so casual on the fact, made their faces freeze in shock.

what else was their captain hiding?

[ miniature : BONUS ]

“why are you protecting those two, fire fist?” smoker snarled, watching as the entire strawhat crew got away from him.

“it’s normal for an older brother to worry about his bungling little brother,” ace smirked, the heat that was dancing on his skin becoming flames.

”your brother-? then you mean to say…” smoker’s voice trailed off, but before he could delve too deep into the new information, he demanded ace move once more.

“i’m afraid that’s a no can do,” ace said, the flames growing stronger with each passing second, “i did warn you though, i said i like to show off in front of [name]. so you understand where i’m coming from even more, right?”

“hardly,” smoker grunted, still not understanding how ace was related to both [name] and luffy.

“come on, you wouldn’t wanna put in some extra effort in impressing your lover?”

『 prev 』 ˗ˏˋ꒰ 🌊 ꒱ 『 next 』

taglist (lmk if u want to be tagged ! <3 :

@skullr0se , @strawberrii-tea

#≡;- ꒰ ° keep safe series ꒱#ks #one piece x male reader #one piece x reader #x male reader #x reader #male reader #one piece male reader #one piece imagines #male reader imagines #anime male reader #one piece fanfiction #one piece fanfic #male reader fanfic #male reader fanfiction

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andythelemon · 9 months ago

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Life update 2024

Hey everyone! It’s been a while since I last wrote anything of substance here. How time flies! Happy new year, happy year of the dragon! I hope this one is kind and auspicious for you all.

I'll admit to falling off the art train terribly for most of 2023. I barely drew; a lot of things I posted were older pieces for projects I couldn't share at the time. I think I speak for most of us when I say it's not been a great time for art collectively; growing frustrations with social media and despair at the state of current global affairs leaves little room for creative inspiration. I know many artist friends of mine are in the same boat. There's little one can do except plod on and hope for better times ahead, I guess? I'll do my best regardless!

Having said that, I did have a major touch-grass-normie arc offline, and as wild as it was, I'm glad I invested time and energy into that area of my life. After the lockdown years of terminal-onlineness, it felt great to do things that were not related to fandom at all, to have new experiences, to make new friends, reconnect with old ones, see new things. It was funny and terrifying all at once. I truly felt like a shonen and shojo protagonist (we will not go into details of the love triangle situation, IYKYK!). There were ups and downs, sadness and laughter, but that's part of life. I'm grateful for all that's happened and am a better, wiser, more mature person because of it. This past year taught me it's not about categorizing life's happenings into a basic good/bad dichotomy, but more learning from each experience and acknowledging we are wiser and grateful for having weathered what's thrown our way. Character development!

The universe has a way of working things out... so at the end of 2023, I had the opportunity to travel for 3 months. After hopping around the East Coast, Milan, various bits of Japan and a beach break in sunny Egypt, I've returned home with a renewed vigor for living my best life again. It was a joy to hang out with various artist friends in person and meet some of you at ANYC. I'll cherish every second of my travels and hope we can meet again soon!

I did fall off the nerd bandwagon for a while, so I gotta get back into the various anime on air! I've been watching Magi in my own time... such a guilty pleasure, but so many things await, including catching up on JJK S2, BSD, and everything else. Just goes to show my deep love for adventure, friendship-fuelled stories keeps me going. No promises on what this year holds art wise, but I'll continue trying hard and sharing what I can, as well as the usual self-indulgent group projects.

Thanks as always for the kind support and for sticking around. This blog is 12 this year... crazy, huh? See you on the other side!

#tp #shut up andy

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sinner-sunflower · 8 months ago

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A HH Lucifer-centric AU 4/?

PART 1 , PART 2, PART 3, PART 5, PART 6, PART 7, PART 8, PART 9, PART 10, PART 11, PART 12, PART 13, PART 14, PART 15, PART 16, PART 17, PART 18, PART 19, PART 20, PART 21, PART 22

Thanks to your support, I am so committed to this. When I finish this, I plan to make it into a long, proper, one-shot- better format and everything!

I've been doing these chapters in the middle of work lmao, so if you see a typo or some edits, it's me rereading it after work.

I'm trying to include more Alastor but he's pretty hard to write.

I used Velvette so much here cos I love her as that bitch you love to hate. She is obviously the spokesperson of the Vees

---------------------------------------------

The hotel lobby is filled with unbearable silence as hell's overlords and high members of the Ars Goetia arrive one by one.

Just a few hours ago, Alastor heard from Carmila Carmine that the king had called a meeting for the top ruling people of hell. Charlie doesn't know why her dad called for it in the hotel.

The Ars Goetia (minus Stolas) were whispering among themselves and shooting the sinner overlords dirty looks every now and again. The overlords were good at pretending they couldn't hear anything. Apparently, they at least have the sense to know that that would be a fight they cannot win.

The hotel's residents collectively claimed it as their spot. Husk is talking with Angel quietly, keeping him distracted and out of view of Valentino, Vaggie is holding her spear as she keeps a close eye on the strangers in their home, Nifty is obsessively cleaning a corner of the bar (Husk keeps telling her that it is still dirty just so she won't venture elsewhere), and Cherri is playing with an unlit bomb in her hand.

Rosie and Stolas decided to approach Charlie and Alastor at the bar at the same time, both slightly bowed to her.

Charlie: Prince Stolas. Rosie.

Stolas: Hello, princess.

Charlie: How's Octavia?

Stolas: Via misses your outings together. But she is fine. She's with her mother today.

Rosie: Not that I'm not happy to see ya, Alastor. But why exactly are we here? Our Carmila has not stated a reason why.

Alastor: You know as much as me, my dear.

Stolas: It must be dire. His majesty rarely calls for the Goetia's presence. He is not here yet?

Charlie: No. He went down in Sloth earlier. I'm worried. After what happened yesterday, I..

Rosie: Yesterday? Did something happen, sweetie?

Charlie realizes the slip up and backtracks.

Charlie: Nothing, Rosie!

Rosie gives her a look that tells her they're going to be talking about it later. She gives the overlord a weak thumbs up.

Meanwhile, Velvette decides enough is enough and they have wasted too much time waiting.

Velvette: Ugh! Vois, let's go. This is a fuckin' joke.

Carmila: Velvette, calm yourself.

Valentino: Why should she? I had very important shit to shoot today and me being here is making me lose money.

Alastor: Then perhaps you should step down. Having to attend the bare minimum duty of their title must be so difficult for someone so... undeserving.

The Radio Demon has a giant patronizing grin plastered on his face. Alastor's comment prompted Vox to speak up.

Vox: Oh, you timely piece of shit! Fight us right now, Alastor!

Alastor: How unbecoming. Throwing tantrums in front of royalty!

Velvette: I for one, don't want to sit here waiting for a no-show fossil

Charlie's demon side flares as the demon insults her dad.

Charlie: How fucking dare you?!

Random Goetia: You shall know better than to disrespect your king, insolent pest.

Velvette: Ha! You think we're scared of a bunch of birds?

Alastor: Should have known you three cannot behave for a simple meeting haha!

Soon everyone was yelling obscenities at each other, filling the hotel with chaos. Before a proper fight could break out, the door opens with a bang, silencing every demon.

Lucifer has arrived, following him were the other Sins. They were arguing amongst themselves from behind him. Charlie can only catch glimpses of what is being said as voices overlap each other.

Beelzebub: Bel-

Mammon: Are you fuckin-

Satan: Wrath is-

Leviathan: We cannot-

Asmodeus: Evacuation-

Belphegor: Grown another mile-

Lucifer says nothing the entire time and just takes a seat in the middle of the semi-circle table he conjured up. With the way the table was placed in front of everyone else, Charlie gets the feeling of deja vu of her hearing in heaven. But now her dad will be the one passing judgment.

Most of the sinners in the room back up as the Sins continue to argue with their full form.

Lucifer sits back and raises a hand and the yelling stops.

Back then, she never really understood why demons were afraid of her dad. He was always a silly and happy guy when spending time with her. But one time, she sneaks into his rare meetings with the Sins and sees why he was called the devil.

The anger she saw then could have given her Uncle Satan a run for Uncle Mammon's money.

Lucifer: Thank you all for coming on such short notice. I will cut to the chase. I have called you all here because something is brewing at the very depths of hell. Something that may affect us all.

Stolas: The Ars Goetia is at your disposal, sire. But may I ask what is this about?

Belphegor: I can answer that. A few months ago, an anomaly appeared at the edge of Sloth. It was not a problem until-

She pressed her touchpad and a hologram screen appeared showing the infected ground.

Not a single demon didn't widen their eyes.

Angel: What the fuck is that?

Belphegor: We wouldn't have called you all here if it was not this severe.

She taps and shows a mutilated demon pig.

Belphegor: This is Patient Zero. An animal on a nearby farm made contact with the anomaly. It instantly infected the whole body, controlling the creature whilst killing it slowly. If it can affect an animal like this, we fear what it may do to-

Velvette: And what do you expect us to do about it exactly? Why the fuck would we care about some old place we can't even go to.

Belphegor is briefly stunned by the interruption but ignores the sinner's disrespect.

Belphegor: Because you would have to be naive to think that it will stop in Sloth. We cannot be too careful.

Velvette: So you think we would risk our lives? Yeah. No thanks. How do we even know that it will affect us? It's just a pig. The worst we can get is horrible floor decor.

Lucifer stands up and moves silently towards the middle for everyone to see.

Lucifer: Free will does not mean you are free from consequences.

The king starts to remove his shirt to everyone's panic, except Belphegor.

Mammon: Woah woah, mate. The fuck ya doin?

Lucifer shrugs off the last piece of clothing to reveal the glowing, infected marks. It has not been a day since he touched it but the veins are already covering the entire right half of his torso.

Charlie: Dad!

The princess attempts to go to her father's side but Vaggie holds her back.

Lucifer: Shall we proceed without any more interruptions?

---------------------------------------------

What to look forward to in Part 5:

the rest of the meeting

more dialogue from the other Sins. Cannot decide what personality to give to Leviathan.

My HC for Satan is he's like one of those old butler types but has a jacked body (I know he has that workout app, but I'm leaning more of the liver king type of a gentle strongman with anger issues. I don't want him to be a fuckboy gymbro)

more badass lucifer

the Vees getting scolded like the children they are

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oneatlatime · 9 months ago

Note

Hiii!!! I’ve been binging through your blog for the past few weeks and I noticed how you talk about how Kataang(Katara x Aang) is portrayed in the show. Honestly yeah, I will admit I didn’t like it at first but now I just don’t really care for it. But I’d be interested hearing an in-depth opinion on the ship(unless you already did and I just never noticed or forgot 😭).

Another question, do you think you’re going to read the comics that came out the series? If you’re asking my opinion I’d say they’re a uuuh 7-8 out of 10 IG?

I do have thoughts on Kataang which I haven't shared yet. Part of me thinks I should wait to answer your ask until I've finished the series; it's obvious to me that these two are being set up to be the big finale couple, which means if I talk about them now I'm probably missing the pieces I need to have a full, well-rounded opinion. But you know what? I feel like talking about them now. So here goes.

Short answer: It peeves me that Aang comes from a culture that seemingly doesn't even have parents, yet he still manages to date his mother.

Long answer: they're both way too young. I'm a huge fan of letting the kids be kids for as long as possible. Especially with these kids, who have been prevented from being kids by the war. As Katara points out in the opening scene of the very first episode, she's been the mother since her own died (or at least she feels like she has had to be the mother). Call me crazy, but I'd rather Katara spend a few years after the war doing dumb childish stuff to recapture that lost childhood than jump straight into a relationship. Isn't the safety and space to do dumb childish stuff one of the things those who are trying to end the war are fighting for? Shouldn't she get to enjoy that? And Aang is just way too young no matter what way you look at it. He's 12 right? I think that would make him a grade 6 student. Back in my day (yells at cloud) Grade 6 students collected yugioh cards and feuded over who had the snazzier lunch box. I could picture a 12 year old having a crush on a slightly older girl that goes to the same school, but it would be short lived and unactionable. I guess Katara would be around 14? So, a grade 8 student. A grade 8 girl would not date a grade 6 boy. It would just never happen.

They've both got bigger fish to fry. Aang is the last Air Nomad AND the current Avatar. When he fully takes on both of those positions, what time will he have for a girlfriend? Katara is the only Southern Waterbender. Whether or not she wants the responsibility, it will be her duty to single-handedly reconstruct a huge portion of her nation's culture from the ground up once she returns south. Does she have the time to ping pong around the globe mothering her boyfriend as he rides giant animals or does Avatar stuff? Say she wants to: what will her family and the rest of her tribe think of the only person who can access such a huge part of their culture riding off into the sunset?

Their current relationship dynamic is still too mother/son. This is more obvious in season 1 than in season 2 (maybe that's growth?) but you can't depict a male/female pair as pieta and then expect me to ship. I think this could change somewhat, but I've already been disappointed in that. I thought that once Katara had mastered waterbending and therefore felt she had something other than mothering to contribute to the group, she would back off with the mothering. And she did, a little, but not enough for my tastes. Maybe as Aang fully steps into the Avatar role and the last Air Nomad role (sidenote: no idea what the latter would look like) he'll move on to a more equal relationship with Katara.

I think Katara is meant for better things than rebirthing a nation. Bending seems to be at least somewhat genetic. So if Aang wants Airbending in any form to survive after his death, he's going to need a billion kids. While I could definitely see Katara wanting children, I don't see her as the barefoot pregnant type.

I'm not convinced that Aang has a clear picture of Katara. She has flaws, which is good! Does Aang see them?

I get the feeling that, while they are helping each others' skills grow as they travel the globe, they are also preventing each others' personalities from growing. As long as Aang is around, Katara has someone to mother. As long as Katara is around, Aang has someone who prevents him from feeling the full weight of his responsibilities. Again, this is worse in season 1, but how often did Katara deny that Aang was to blame for something that was at least somewhat his fault? Aang will never become a fully rounded person until he can look at his flaws and mistakes dead on and say "my bad" without a Katara in the background going "no you're perfect!" Katara deserves to find out what kind of person she is outside of a nurturing role. Quick thought experiment: what if you pair Katara with someone who needs no nurturing, or better yet, nurtures her? And what if you pair Aang with someone as bluntly truthful as Toph? Katara and Aang might find both of those situations uncomfortable at first, but I think it would contribute to their growth.

Aang having a crush on an oblivious Katara would be a great single season arc. I think it would fit both of their characters well, and I think Aang growing past latching on to the first person he saw after the iceberg would be a good way to show that he's rooting himself in his time-displaced present, and fully committing to ending the war. And don't get me wrong, I love Aang and Katara both as a fighting team and as friends.

These kids are all fighting a war, and all kids. I don't mind the supporting characters having romances, because it's not like Sokka or Suki can end the war, no matter how hard they try/might want to. But I'm a big believer in doing one thing at a time, and I think if you're the only person in the whole world who can end a war, then ending the war should take precedence over dating. I'm aware that that's an unrealistic expectation and out of step with the show's theme of balance. In the real world, birth rates skyrocket during war time because people live for the moment and grab happiness (read boinking) wherever they see it. But both these kids are pre-boinking age so I'm going to be a cranky old fart about it.

Being the wife of the Avatar is a position that will often come with being relegated to second place, especially with the amount of work that undoing a century of war will take. Although she works well in a team, Katara is a naturally dominant personality. Katara did enough of putting herself in second place before the series started. I think Katara could very easily fall into the pattern of subjugating her own needs and desires and putting her husband's first, but I don't want that to happen. And one way to prevent that from happening is to prevent her from dating the single most politically important person in the universe. (To be clear, Aang would never deliberately squish a wife like that, I just think the workload of being Avatar and last air nomad would cause that to happen)

A lot of my objections to this pairing are very adult objections. I don't know what I would have thought about this pairing when I was the age of the show's target audience. It undoubtedly would have bothered me less, although I probably would have been put off by how twee it is. As an adult, all I can see are babies playing house.

As for the comics, I hadn't made any concrete plans to read them. I don't know where I'd get access to them. I'm not sure how canonical they are. I guess I should probably decide whether or not I want to read them after I've finished the whole series. I've been told that my girl Jin appears in one of them, so I definitely have some interest. I have also had the Avatar Kyoshi novels strenuously recommended to me. But so much of Avatar's charm, to me, is in the medium. And while comics are closer to animation than books are, they're still static. Avatar does movement so well.

#ask #this got way too long #short short answer: they're too young #not much incompatible about their personalities #plenty incompatible about their responsibilities

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thetravelingtyper · 5 months ago

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On the same page... Pt 11 (Simon 'Ghost' Riley x reader Bookshop! AU)

As Saturday morning dawns all the truths come spilling out...

Part 10, Part 12, Masterlist

Warnings! Typical Ghost violence in a dream

AN: Working full-time in the library now :D I will be writing still and trying to post once or twice weekly for this, Our shattered heart and comfort character.

The next 30 minutes find you pulling a freshly showered and changed Simon to your room. You wrestle with your phone, pulling up your music app and getting some music going. You flip through a few songs until lyrics tumble softly out. The choice satisfies something in you and Simon grins in amusement.

In a few weeks I will get time

To realize it's right before my eyes

And I can take it if it's what I want to do

You rifle through the drawer next to your bed and pull out a few bottles of nail polish, glancing at Simon as he sits down on your bed. The dark green of his shirt mixes well with his tattoos and skin. You pull out black, of course, a classic, but a few darker shades of grey as well. You pass a handful to Simon and then turn back for a few shades of purple for yourself.

And I am leaving and this is starting to feel like

It's right before my eyes

And I can taste it

It's my sweet beginning

He ponders for a moment, not used to a choice like this but it humors him. He was by no means against the idea just not used to the prim and proper care of his nails and hands. Kyle had told him one time over drinks that having a good skin care routine could make or break someone. He runs a hand through his hair, he at least took care of that after not worrying about it due to the balaclava. He used decent shampoo and conditioner routinely. Looking back to the nail polish, Simon hovers between a dark green and dark grey. He voices this and you think.

And I can tell just what you want

You don't want to be alone

And I can't say it's what you know

But you've known it the whole time

Yeah, you've known it the whole time

“The green would look with your skin tone but the grey is a neutral.”

He just nods passing you the other colors to return to the drawer while you keep a dark purple and the grey. You grab a new set of tools alongside your own and close the drawer. You then sit next to him, thighs about touching, and take his right hand. They are rough from service, a few scars littering his knuckles and as you flip them you trace your left thumb over his palm. His fingers curl in at the tenderness and you can see you don't need to do much other than just painting his nails. You hum, setting the kits aside. You set Simon's hand down in your lap and take the bottle of grey nail polish to shake it.

Maybe next year I'll have no time

To think about the questions to address

Am I the one to try to stop the fire?

When you're satisfied you unscrew the bottle and begin to paint. You swipe the brush over each nail in short but wide strokes. Once you finish his right hand you grin, the color looks good on him and you pat your thigh. Simon flexes his hand, careful of the polish, and moves his left hand to your knee where you finish that one too. You close the bottle and set the bottle on the table. He looks at you before examining his nails. Simon doesn't seem put off by it and you giggle when he admires them in the light.

I wouldn't test you

I'm not the best you could have attained

Why try anything?

I will get there

Just remember I know

You mention to your headboard, a dark wood piece with intricate trim that suggested it, like most of the furniture you had was thrifted. Simon nods and, minding his hands, stands. He moves around the foot of your bed and gets on to lean against the headrest, his long legs able to stretch out. While you do your nails he takes the moment to observe your room. Across from your bed is a TV with a switch docked and ready. He is amused however to see a VHS player, with a scattered collection of tapes around your room. Posters of 90s advertisements and franchises litter the room walls along with your records. He looks to the booked corner of your room where there is a plush lavender reading chair with 3 legs and one attached block to make up the 4th. In the chair sits a frog teddy bear.

You notice him looking,

“That's William, the love of my life.”

Simon nods a hello,

“Good to meet the competition.”

You laugh, setting the purple aside as you finish and moving to sit neck to Simon, both of you leaning against pillows. Your heart warms at the image and hazel eyes regard you.

And I can tell just what you want

You don't want to be alone

And I can't say it's what you know

But you've known it the whole time

Yeah, you've known it the whole time

You hum along to the song as you lean back against the pillows, happy to just let the music finish. You yawn before shuffling carefully closer to Simon and tucking your head into his shoulder.

“Give it 15 or so minutes and we should be good, it is quick to dry.”

“Right.”

Simon's voice rumbles through you his heart swelling with you tucked against him. Mindful of the polish his hand moves, and he lays it over your knee, thumbing circles into it. It's a little ticklish and you giggle quietly before nudging him. His lips quirk up but he stops, fingers pausing and his hand just resting on you.

And I can tell just what you want

You don't want to be alone

And I can't say it's what you know

But you've known it the whole time

Yeah, you've known it the whole time

As the song finishes you call for your phone to pause the music. 15 minutes pass in a blur of light conversation as Simon talks about his brother and mom. While his mom lived back in Manchester his brother traveled a lot. During tales of his childhood and early recruit days Simon doesn’t mention his father, but the clenching of his hand speaks volumes. Once you are sure the nail polish is fine your hand moves to Simons and the contact breaks his train of thought as he turns to you. The soft lamp light is warm and it lights up the gold in his eyes.

You cross your legs and Simon turns himself easily to face you as you tug a stuffed dragon, one from your original book tour with James to your chest. Its jeweled eyes glimmer a deep ruby and you just think. Flashes of stormy eyes, soft and tender moments against James as you both talk into the night. Your chest feels tight then as you tug your keens to your chest, hugging the dragon closer you reach for your phone and hit play.

The tinkling of music cuts into memory as you and James dance in your childhood home's kitchen.

I've got miles of regrets and confusing friends

But perhaps it's just my stupid head in the end

Thinking should I wait here or make my way home?

You said, "Go" (you said, "Go")

You had been finally able to go home after all those years and James came with you to meet your parents. It went swimmingly but as the days drifted on you found yourself missing Sam and your true home. On the last night, you found yourself ambling in the kitchen digging through ingredients for baking.

Cavetown spins away as you sweep back and forth in the dim light. There is a noise and you jump before a set of strong and familiar arms come around you and spin you. You smile when James presses a kiss to your jaw.

Making up problems that don't exist

Why do I let myself dream like this?

We're floating away, my body's in space

We are going home

A smooth voice joins in as James moves you skillfully in the wide space of the kitchen. You had learned early on dancing was a love of the man. He kept rhythm naturally and would often pull you into his arms.

Missing pieces of my skull

I'll sew on patches of my own soul

There's nothing you or I can do so let the stars fall

'Cause from up here the sky's my thoughts and we're all so small

The song was special for you both as it inspired parts of your first book. You would hum it before James would pick it up on acoustic or the keyboard tucked into his apartment. You had even considered the song for one of your wedding dances.

Meteor shower, quick take cover

But the hues in our hair compliment one another

I'd sell my own bones for sapphire stones

'Cause blue's your favorite color

Back in your bedroom, your mind tucks away into itself for a moment. When you first moved here the cold hit deeper. You tried to throw yourself into writing, but the escape never got far. And at night your dreams would dance, swirling out the part of your wounded heart left behind.

Missing pieces of my skull

I'll sew on patches of my own soul

There's nothing you or I can do so let the stars fall

'Cause from up here the sky's my thoughts and we're all so small

Simons watches you quietly before a shaky inhale from you sends a quiver in his chest. The song is not lost on him and he moves.

We're all so

My heart and the earth share the same rule

It starts with love and it ends with you

But don't go outside, it's dangerous tonight

Without me right here by your side

“Stretch out love.”

You just nod into the dragon, unwinding your legs as you clutch the dragon with fresh tears welling. Simon's hands clutch your sides gently before he lays out, laying his head on the pillow before offering an arm out. Your eyes widen before you tuck yourself into his chest, his arms wrapping around you on the soft comforter of your bed. As you cry you hug the dragon to your chest. Simon just hums to the song quietly, it rumbling through his chest. The lyric hit you in the chest,

Take it slow, you'll know

Which way to go

Sew up your skull

Take your time

And we'll be just fine

Everything had been right for so long, then the world was torn out from under-

There is a quiet hushing from Simon and he presses a kiss to your head as the song finishes

Missing pieces of my skull

I'll sew on patches of my own soul

The following silence rings out before Simon continues to hum, his voice taking on a musical tint as you calm in his arms. Hearing you quiet down he slows to a stop, he goes to move back but you wind your arms around him.

“Stay”

His eyes widen but you feel him nod,

“Always.”

He reaches for a spare blanket sitting on the floor before spreading it over the two of you. He clicks off the lamp, engulfing you in a warm darkness and you snuggle into his chest as Simon exhales softly.

“Si.”

He hums, a hand returning to your hair,

“Thank you.”

Simon awakens in Ghost, trudging through snow, dull pain thudding in his chest. He is alone, on some god-awful mission in the middle of fuck all nowhere. Static crackles as snow drifts down in the fading light.

He tries to move his arms but Ghost just gnashes his teeth, jaw tight as the machine moves on into the light.

Death, the reek of blood, and the stench of iron splatters barren grey walls.

Skulls knock against the concrete as he drops from above. Simon paces in his mind as Ghost eliminates soul after soul in a white wasteland as the snow stains. Hours pass in a trickle as the thudding in his chest thickens sickenly, a languid pull through him before hands reach his throat and he is there again. Buried. Ghost is marching as Simon thrashes, hands splayed across his neck as Ghost returns to the chocking white.

But before Simon can black out there is a flash, Ghost stops, rifle dropping into the snow as Simon cries out in frustration, the rush of memories snapping as he spasms and drops into the snow writhing in pain. The weight of the gear is too much. The cold is too much. The weight of lives and steel is too much, its-

The sound of pads in the snow- Simon's eyes shoot open and he tears the balaclava off, flinging it into the forest as he takes in a panicked breath. His eyes dart around before a flash of orange is in front of him. He exhales shakily, control seeping into his skin as heat curls around him, a hand to his face and a pair of lips to his.

As his breathing calms the fox pads towards him and tucks against his chest.

SImon breathing calms in his sleep as your hand leaves his face and you press a kiss to his cheek before gently rolling out of bed in the early morning. It was barely 6 and the man seemed in a deep sleep. His movements in his sleep had woken you a little earlier as he was having a nightmare. You soothed him gently before deciding to just get up.

You pass into the kitchen, Sam probably won't be up until 8 and you didn't want to wake Simon. You wanted to bake but a cup of tea and a book downstairs sounded like a good thing to pass the few hours until Sam could open shop. You would be closing earlier in the afternoon to go meet the boys. Simon would probably need to leave soon you think with a frown as you make a cup of Earl Grey and head downstairs, cracking the top door so Sam and Simon could tell you were in the store.

The steps creak and you smile as the door opens into the early morning dimness. The store's windows allow in enough light to see your steps. It used to frighten you coming in alone but after a few weeks, it became home. You turn on the lamps, voting to keep the overhead lights off. There are a few commuters on the streets but your little corner of London is snug and quiet this time in the morning.

You tuck into the stool behind the counter and begin to read. But as the time passes towards 6:30, your mind swirling with the fish of the Nautilus and the adventures of Captain Nemo a tapping sound pulls your mind from the book. You turn your ear up towards the back door, but no one is stirring and your phone has no messages. Your eyes shoot to the front door and there is a person there. You shoot up curious and a little apprehensive. It is a little dark to tell but there is a figure holding something and you debate what to do.

The tapper seems to acknowledge your attention as they knock, a polite three taps against the door that has your heart freezing. That it couldn’t - Your heart is in your throat, tea forgotten, and book slumping before falling to the floor with a thunk.

Upstairs Simon jolts awake, perhaps some strange sense of fate as he rolls out of bed in search of you.

With a quivering breath you creep around the counter on autopilot before reaching the halfway point to the door you freeze, turning back to the stairs and thinking about running to get Sam, or Simon your mind supplies. But the low temperature and another set of knocks shock your heart.

You clench your teeth, your compassion winning out as you turn the final steps to the door and pull it open.

Simon comes out into the main area and notices light through the crack of the door leading to the store, he nods to himself, opens the door, and passes quietly down the stairs.

In shock of the man in front of you back wordlessly into the safety of the bookstore as James fucking Marin stands in the doorway. In his hands are two cups from the cafe nearby and a bouquet is tucked into his arm. But it's the look on his face that has you retreating, a look of surprise, yes, that you even opened the door, but a wretched look of love and melting eyes as a storm curls its way around his heart. He stands at the door, the cold blowing in as he is unsure, the look of hurt on your face digs into him like a knife.

He, this, everything feels wrong, it all felt fucking wrong, since that day. What once was love, a treasured closeness devolved into you retreating from him. Blue eyes look between you and the store and his brows draw close in a deep concern. He sets the drinks down on a little hat table first, before pulling the door close as you stand frozen.

He clenches the bouquet tighter as a potent anxiety bites him, somethin in his gut stirs and he looks to you as you are going through your processing points. He knew you too well, but this fear was a potent unknowable.

There is a sound then, and James's eyes dart to the back of the counter and he feels himself stand taller.

Having appeared silently was a panther of a man, he had only an inch on him but despite the causal clothes, there was a way the man carried himself, dark eyes first shooting at you then meeting his. James feels his muscles tense when the panther finally speaks.

“Dove?”

You about jump head and body shooting around your eyes are watery, Simon can see them glisten in the low light, and something dark spikes in his chest, his eyes sharpen and muscles tense as he pulls himself and he feels Ghost settle.

“Si?” Your voice is small in the morning quiet.

You step back towards him, stopping with a look towards James unsure, but it's all that Simon needs. He rounds the counter before coming to stand behind you, a hand moving to brush over your shoulder and around your middle, his muscles firm as your hands shoot to his tattooed arm for support.

James takes it in with shock before he straightens, eyes on Simon’s arm and his jaw clenching. Sharp eyes track his every breath with the precision of a trained killer, but a possessive anger burns in James and he moves to take a step forward when you finally speak.

“Why are you here James?”

Your voice is shaky and you dig yourself further into the man behind you, eyes tracing firm muscles and scars. It's the gleam of silver around his neck James sees and his eyes widen,

A soldier?

His voice is firm as he replies, accent thickening with tension,

“I came to talk.”

You balk at that,

“Is it about work?”

James lets out a breath but his heart pounds,

“It is about us.”

This gets Simon's arm pulling you tighter to him and there's a low rumble from his chest. Your head whips up at the reply and a spark of anger ignites,

“Us, US? The first thing out of your mouth is to talk about US?” Shock, as your teeth grit, James takes a step forward before Simon finally speaks.

“Watch yourself.” His accent is thicker and his voice deep, it sends a tingle down your spine.

James tenses eyes shooting up to Simon before he addresses him,

“And you are?”

Simon internally smirks, he dips and presses a kiss to your head before gently releasing you. He is pleased, however, when you tuck into his side, a hand seeking his.

“Lieutenant Simon Riley.”

James's eyes widen at the rank and it fits he thinks, He is a tank. Seeing you tucked into the side of another man grinds against his heart, sparks of pain lighting up the darkness that has been in his mind for the past months. But rage and pain were not what he was, not anymore.

James relinquishes, careful to make slow movements and you watch as the man resets. He is coiled, a tenseness not usually for the easygoing man. Stress has tainted him, his hair is longer, the length of it curving past his ears and he has let his beard grow in. Your heart hurts because he is handsome, and he looks back at you with a lost expression before you can see his heart on his sleeve.

There is a stare-off for a moment before James deflates and looks at you, his voice is smaller then,

“Can you trust me my heart?”

You physically wince into Simon at the word, tears watering at your eyes again and James steps forward without thinking. Simon stiffens when you move forward, there are tears in your voice, you are smaller than he’s ever heard,

“Why?”

James clenches his jaw, pained as he wants to say everything, he heard Sabrina’s claims that night it broke everything. There was one thing he couldn't say, forced into silence by work, it succeeded, didn't it? She won in the end, but he ran, stupid at first not to chase after you. But, never again.

You see it in James, a quiet resolution as he readies himself.

“I never slept with her. It, all of this, was to protect your career.”

You blank, your brain short-circuiting. You stand frozen, not hearing him. Your mind jumped to Sarah, eyes flickering to his left hand, the rings?

“But Sarah said-”

“Sabrina was drunk, that event was for show, it was either that or you got thrown to the curb.”

James grits his teeth at the memory of that board office meeting. Sabrina sitting at her dad's side, a smile on her face as she named her demands.

“What?”

“You were never pulled under a contract, Ms. Williams found out a few days ago and it blew up in the children's department, there was a full-on revolt.” There was a smile on his face at that.

“But you said tha-”

“Don’t you dare fucking believe that,” He clenches his fist around the bouquet, Irises, red carnations, and honeysuckle. He holds out the bouquet and your heart picks up a beat at the meaning of the flowers, A message, heartache, and devotion. What he says next his voice breaks,

“Have the flowers ever lied?”

You can’t help the sob that follows, as you tenderly take the bouquet from him. He has never lied to you, not in this sense.

“What is all of this James? Why now, why not text, fucking write a letter?” Anger sparks but the tired look on his face quells it. He takes another baby step forward but you shield yourself with the bouquet, not trusting. Simon doesn't move.

“I couldn't, not while you were still connected or within the power of those bastards. But” his lips quirked up as he looked past you and Simon.

“You have a lot of fucking nerve to show your face here.”

Your head darts to Sam, his shirt is off, evidence of sleep and you can see the dragon tattoos dancing across his chest, coiling around his heart. Sam steps around the counter, fists clenched in rage, reading Simon’s tense form, but you hold up a hand and he pauses at the flowers. James smiles at the sight of Sam, it lights up his face like a lifeline.

“Sam here I owe everything to, well White Owl Publishing as well.”

Seeing the confusion on your face he opens his arms.

“You left sweetheart. There was nothing to protect, especially once White Owl took your books over. Why do you think Sofia had such an easy time getting your publishing rights?”

Your eyes widen, everything falling together in your mind, and your eyes shoot to a gleam of silver on his left hand, it was a simple band but you recognize the engraving, and you gape at it. James's eyes shoot to it, it was the ring you gifted to him when your second book made it.

“Youve-?”

“Worn it ever since sweetheart, it's always, always been you. Once the publication rights were confirmed I broke everything I was contracted to help, they pulled the power on me. I swear it on my life nothing ever happened. Ms. Williams can confirm everything when she comes.”

You just gape up at him as Sam blanks,

“So all of this was a fucking show?” Sam seeths, stepping past Simon but you pull on his arm, James steps forward, a fire picking in his eyes at that,

“To protect what she loved most, writing, her books, and her career? Yes.” He looks past Sam, blue eyes looking into your soul.

You step back as if shot, you wanted to be angry, to cry and bang your fist and scream. But James wasn’t lying, the look in his eyes told you that much.

“Sofia will find out this morning I guarantee it, this tour business is all Ms. Williams, and” James takes the final step towards you, Sam tenses,

“She broke my contract.”

You blink up at him in shock as a hand raises to your face, and you breathe shakily as a familiar hand cups your cheek, His eyes take you in, the light of a twinking star caught in them and he smiles

“I am free.”

You clutch the bouquet to your chest as you lean into the touch for a moment but you come to yourself. The words that follow have James freezing when an arm comes around you. Blue eyes flicker up to burning umber, pools of melted iron as Simon steps in,

“I can’t, not that James, not anymore.”

James freezes pulling his hand back as if he was burned. His chest clenches as he remembers the firm voice over the phone. It starts to make a bit more sense when Sam crosses his arms.

“Right-” The syllables tumble out “-after everything I wouldn't expect that, not -” James cuts himself off. He wants to cry, he realizes then, but under Simon’s sharp eyes and you tucked against him. He looks to Sam finding a protective glare, but it is you that turns all the men's heads.

You are already crying, the pain of the months burning your heart, but there is a sliver that tries to understand. The fact a man you loved and trusted would pull a stunt like this, bruises your heart. But there are the memories of dances and writing, it would never be the same, but-

But your stories were your life and if your relationship was meant to die to protect them.

James and Sam can see the debate, but it's Simon murmuring your name. Your head turns up against his chest and you look up to him and drown in his eyes. It was compassion that shaped you, you pat his arm and he loosens his arm with a quiet exhale.

James’s eyes widen when you pull apart from Simon and you pad towards him cautiously.

“It will never be the same.”

He feels his heart pick up and James tilts his head down to you, eyes wide as you come to stand in front of him, a tender hand reaching out to his chest. You feel his heart stuttering,

“You broke everything,” your eyes flicker up to his clutching the flowers as a tangible reminder of who he was,

“You shattered my heart, broke my trust, and threw our relationship away, for which I won’t forget.”

His hand shakily covers yours and you cherish it for a quiet moment as a fresh set of tears rolls down your cheeks and this causes James to break, a tear rolling down his cheek. His voice is shaky,

“I did what I thought was best for you, I see now that may have been a mistake. I wanted to protect you but I hurt you, I will never forgive myself for that, and I haven't stopped loving you.”

Your hand shakes under his but you continue,

“I don't know where we go from here, I will need time.” Your eyes turn down but you slowly but surely touch your forehead to his chest in a final act of grace. It is not a promise of continuation but one of the possibilities of forgiveness and a new beginning and it only causes James’s heart to hurt more as he resists engulfing you in a hug.

“Always, I will always be here. I just hope maybe even to be- I don’t know anymore. But I will wait for you, always”

His voice falters out as you lift your head from his chest and just look at him, but you nod and in a painful sweep pull your hand away to clutch the bouquet to your chest.

James looks anxious, hand flexing to his chest in an echo of where you were and is about to speak when Simon steps forward and you finally curl into his chest. He is angry but the rage is quelled with you against his chest, but the fire does not leave his eyes as he looks into and even through James.

“You’ve said enough for now.”

James fist clenches but he steps back with a curt nod.

“Right, I will see you tomorrow.” And with a final glance back at you in Simon's arms, he leaves.

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