#this is just a very common reaction to weird art (not just mine) | Explore Tumblr posts and blogs

mysticdragon3md3 · 2 years ago

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I think one of my favorite fanartists blocked me.

I can't reblog their fanart post. And though the Tumblr algorithm suggests their blog to me and suggests other posts which have reblogged their art, whenever I try to go to their blog or their original posts, Tumblr says there's nothing there. Google says this is one of the few ways to tell if you've been blocked on Tumblr.

Feel sad, but I can't blame them. I am a weirdo, and post some very strange rants and reactions. I've even disagreed with a lot of the fanon in my current OTP. They _should_ protect themselves from my weirdness.

Trying not to dwell on it. Many times, my anxiety has made me paranoid that a fandom community I loved/respected was shunning me. Thankfully, time proved my anxiety and paranoia wrong. But now it looks like I've found a case where it was true. It's just fortunate that by now, I've already felt so disconnected from my OTP's fandom that I don't feel as sad as I've felt before when I was simply paranoid about these same things. Odd. But i guess it's easier to take being blocked, vs finding angry posts about me.

But this once again makes me sad that I got out of Persona 5 fandom and into FE3H instead. P5 fandom was so nice and felt like a community. ...But it's probably my whiney posts like this, complaining about being caught into FE3H fandom, that would likely make anyone block me.

But how would anyone even find my whiney posts anyway? I don't use common tags. And I'm fairly certain almost all my Followers are bots. I've always treated my blog like no one was Following. The one time someone went through my blog to read posts with uncommon tags, it was after we had gotten into a back and forth reblog conversation. But I've never chatted with the fanartist who likely blocked me.

I wonder what I did wrong. Maybe I said something stupid in my reblog tag posts. Sometimes I forget that they can be read and I write tag comments mostly for me alone. Then I remember other people can read them and I quickly change it, hoping no one saw it. I still regret that time I rambled about some random personal memory of mine, in reblog tags on andrew's adorable dimiclaude fanart. I started ranting about how my cousin would always complain to me about how he ended up making an elaborate drawing on lined paper instead of nice sketch paper, because he thought he was just doodling, each time he started. Then I would always have to chide him into remembering to stop doodling on lined paper and just doodle on blank paper each time, because he'd never know when his doodles would turn elaborate. The way our conversations like this went, it seemed like my cousin was always baiting me into chiding him about it. Maybe that was "empathizing/sharing his frustration with himself", by hearing it externalized through me too. Then I realized that maybe if andrew saw my reminiscing tag comments, he might think I was chiding him for not drawing on nicer paper or something. Even though his paper doodles were just as lively and beautiful as his digital art! ;o;! I quickly changed those tag comments and hoped he didn't see them or thought they were addressed to him. I still wonder if I should DM an apology to andrew. I haven't seen him post to the OTP tag in a long time. ;_; I do say a lot of dumb stuff that would get me understandably blocked. ;_;

Everyday, I am reminded why I purposefully avoided having friends in real life. I just screw up every single interaction. ;_;

But practically speaking, I really should stop posting my every thought and reaction, at least in tag comments. I'd feel kind of wrong if I didn't post whatever I wanted, even my stupid reactionary thoughts, to my own blog, after for so long I advocated for making your blog for you, vs being too self-conscious about your Followers. I definitely have become more wary of stopping myself from writing long comments in reblog tags, like I used to. I've taken steps already. But maybe I should scale back a little bit on using my blog like my private journal. I've been writing my every thought as a post through Tumblr mobile, ever since my laptops have had problems, and I couldn't journal on them. But the thing is, I'm posting about things related to my experience of my fandoms, and recording all that is what my Tumblr blog is for. At least, for me. Again, if Windows Explorer was better at searching files, maybe I'd keep more of my thoughts in my private offline journals, like I used to. But Tumblr's search is just too good and it seems like a much more complete record of my fandom experience. I don't want to give up writing what I want on my blog. If Tumblr could search Private posts, I'd make more of my posts Private. Until then, I am doing what I can: I use unique tags now; I hide most text under a cut. I've done what I can. If someone is going to search through my blog anyway and feel off-put by my weirdness, blocking is all they can do too.

It really is weird that I'm not more broken up about this. Previous fandom experiences have had so much of my emotion invested in it, and my anxiety had my paranoia into overdrive, and any negativity set off my over-sensitivity to the extreme. Well, at least there's this one advantage to the fandom disconnection I've been lamenting for a while.

Maybe it's good to be reminded to not be so dependent on fandom community. Fandom community is really nice and it's fun, but all my enjoyment shouldn't be dependent and so fragile as to fall apart at any slight disagreement. After all, my experience of FE3H fandom has almost reverted back to how I used to experience fandom, back when I'd enjoy a series by myself and never interact with anyone about it. I'd write fanfics for myself and draw fanart for myself, and never show anyone. And I was having fun. I can't really lament feeling disconnected in FE3H fandom, when even enjoying it virtually by myself, is still fun in those same old lone ways. (With the exception of a few regular positive interactors from the fandom, and enjoying everyone's fanart, fics, and discussions, as a lurker. Thanks, everybody. You're so nice. ^_^ )

#wandering in the dark #processing thoughts #fandom #fe3hfuukasetsugetsu #KhalidMitya #social anxiety #tags #blog #personal fandom records #reactions #in this edition of gawd do i ever need therapy #lrb~lrt #fandomfrictionfracas

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spsupervillain · 2 years ago

Link

#Review

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liaswritesrobots · 2 years ago

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Ahh screw it I just wanna geek out some of my reasons for thinking the entire DJD is autistic. 1. This may sound really weird but I would not be surprised if helex hates brushing his teeth for sensory reasons, this is a struggle I have and I wouldn't be surprised if he had it too. 2 you could say their just one big special interest group, the way they act about twords peace and Megatron just feels like a special interest gone too far. 3 kaon's entire personality give me the feeling that if he's not autistic he's at least neurodivergent. Also his relationship with the pet reminds me of how some of us will have a comfort item, or person that it feel like we can't live without. Mine was a plush mimsy from the last mimsy for example (it was taken from me as a kid sadly). 4 very strong emotions are very common I had strong anger reactions early in my life, thus why I feared becoming like Megatron in the past. And like majority of them have strong anger issues 5 nickel's way of showing her love and compassion twords them. I will not say much more. 6 tarn, ohhhh boy tarn. Let's see: strong emotions, obsessive tendencies, his feeling of betrayal and his reaction. The Emperian suite gives sensory seeking vibes, additionally as someone who's also been emotionally abused as a kid in addition to being autistic: his inherent need to hide his true emotions from others no matter how much he trusts them (when you're autistic and this happens you overly generalize that everyone will belittle how you feel especially if it happens more than once with multiple people) His love for theatrics also feeds into this because art is the only way left to express those repressed emotions. You'll even be seeking comfort where ever you'll get it. Honestly I could make an entire post on why I feel tarn is autistic.

Anon this is amazing analysis! And I feel you on that Kaon part I definitely read him as neurodivergent too! But oh my god the Tarn stuff is so good! I can definitely see them all as being autistic. I imagine the glasses for Tesarus are also for sensory issues (maybe he's very sensitive to light) and I know Tarn canonically wears the mask to keep himself from picking at his face. Also with the Pet I can definitely see him being Kaon's comfort "object".

Tarn is definitely being put in the chart now.

#asks #anonymous #also sorry about your plush that's terrible I hate when people do that to kids when they clearly want to keep something #my sister had that happen to her a lot growing up and I still get mad thinking about it even tho I didn't exist yet

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floral-poisons · 3 years ago

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im so shook rn because your mind is literally on the same wavelength as my right now—

EXACTLY—i have a cousin who ended up majoring in english writing with a minor in fine art and she works as a high ranking executive manager for a company and bestie she’s making hella dough. ive honestly come into contact with people who’ve so audaciously told me that english is a useless class and then proceed to ask me to help them write an email because they’re unsure on how they should get their messages across to others. ( funniest part is that one of the people who asked me to help him with this was an uncle of mine who shamed me for not liking stem and gravitating to the humanities instead ) omg it’s a similar thing for us arabs ! arabs started immigrating in the 1880s because of european colonialism ( boooo ! ) and most of the people who afforded the immigration fees were like high ranking literary artists , but when they came to industrial america they switched their fields to stem to fit in. the next few booms of arab immigrants would happen in the 1940s-70s, 1990s-2000s and most recently 2015-now. more of the older immigrants implore us second and third generation immigrant children to do stem, not out of malice or anything, but because they don’t want us to suffer working uneducated entry level jobs like working in the grape fields ( something my grandpa did in the 60s-70s when he immigrated to america after the yemenis kicked the british out ) OOH OMG I LOW-KEY ALWAYS FELT THAT GONE GIRL WAS ANTI-FEMINIST WHEN WATCHING THE MOVIE. honestly , i am thoroughly interested in these different essays you’ve written ! especially the shang-chi and the humanity of asian women ! i watched the film with my chinese friend and she told me she was pleasantly surprised with how they handled asian women , in particular katie’s whole career conflict and xialing not being the surper stereotypical east asian dragon lady. OOH TURNING RED—i was tempted to write a paper on how the movie was received to the public because i noticed some people actually being pissed that the movie didn’t reflect on nine eleven bc it took place like a few months afterwards ?? someone even had the audacity to go and say that the random hijab and turban wearing backround characters should not have been there because of 9/11 ?? i was so confused because it was a movie about inter-generational trauma and menstruation im— DRAG ME WITH YOU TO THE MOVIES AND WE CAN ANALYZE ALL THE TINIEST DETAILS TOGETHER. i actually wrote a paper in my first year in high school about the old bbc pride and prejudice show and how the different hairstyles and dresses showcased different things about the characters ! it was so fun and honestly i need someone like you who cares so much about the little things, as i do

ALSO THIS MESSAGE IS SO LONG ALREADY BUT IF YOU EVER WANTED WE COULD ANALYZE THE CHARACTERS OF TWST TOGETHER-

genie anon !

honestly it’s amazing to see how colonialism and imperialism really impacted communities in very similar ways with similar outcomes (yuck!). whose idea was it to conquer the world? like seriously.

i aspire to be as financially successful as your cousin out of college 😭 but who knows i have no clue what i wanna do aside from working with movies.

the main reasons why gone girl is anti-feminist pretty much lies in the fact that it leans towards common lies used against women and on top of that, it follows the “gaslight gatekeep girlboss” feminism that centers on white women. like if you watch the movie or read the book, it’s so clear that this was written by a white woman.

shang-chi is just amazing in all aspects!! story, camera work. like they did subtle things that really go a long way. and the reaction to turning red was just weird. it’s an intense combination of xenophobia, racism, and misogyny. and to see people dismiss it makes me so mad as an avid fan and defender of the movie.

honestly, i would read an essay about costuming and makeup. there’s a reason why it’s an award.

BUT YES PLEASE I WOULD LOVE TO ANALYZE TWST CHARACTERS WITH YOU!!

#genie anon #anon asks #floral poisons talk

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jilljoycearts · 3 years ago

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About the situation with the previously mentioned reposter, reposts in general, and the fandom. This is mostly about the russian part of the internet, the dark and fearsome place.

This post is very long, so I’m hiding it under the cut.

To sum it all up:

If you see drawings (fanarts) for the game Enderal and for the rest of the SureAI games on the russian social VK, published not by the authors of the drawings or not by their art groups, pages and communities, then they are placed against the will of these very authors.

About the rhetorics (mostly for the Russians that stumble upon this post): what people on VK call repost (share button) is an actual reblogging or retweet. In fact, a repost is re-uploading something not by its owner. Now let's start. The retelling is quite detailed. Also, a warning: although I can retell this whole thing in english from scratch, the post is translated from russian with the help of almighty google. I don't want to bother much with this and spend my energy on it. Most of the mistakes I still fix, but the sentence structure and phrasing might seem weird.

The man (hereinafter "character T"; we do not mention his name because he is only interested in your attention to his person) took under his wing a long-abandoned community (Enderal themed), asking to be a moderator. For several months he was posting stolen drawings (without permission and credits), until his vanity drove him into a trap: with a request of "reblog for reblog" (wanted to promote his own fan-creation) he messaged a small russian community of artists interested in the SureAI games. Naturally, seeing his reposting activities, everyone was utterly indignant. He was incredibly lucky that my drawing was the last one published on the dash of his community. Again, no credit. I left a comment urging him to remove the stolen things and explaining the common truths. To which no one answered, but suddenly a link to my tumblr appeared. I wrote another comment telling to delete again, and again no one answered me. When he had to start talking to me, Character T decided that it was a good idea to load a girl (who was so lucky to know both of us a bit) with the work of a negotiator. I leave it to you to judge the "honor and dignity" of this character and his decision. I scroll forward: he agrees to delete my work, while rolling out a post consisting of articles of the civil code, in which he puts the meaning “I reposted, am reposting and will continue that, because the law allows me”. At the same time, the negotiator girl gets tired of working as his secretary. I already intend to contact him personally, but I find myself in his blacklist. It would seem, "Well, calm down, hedeleted yours." But his intention to repost further stunned everyone. Naturally, the time has come to inform the foreign authors about this chronic stealing.

A new location was unlocked in our amusing adventure: a server of the game developers SureAI on Discord. There, one of the artists from whom he stole called him out, without mentioning the names (yes, the character T was active there, whilst annoying the local inhabitants). He responded after a while, again rolling out his cart of articles on the legality of reposts. He also managed to threaten me personally with something. In general, he was kicked from the server of the developers for lack of culture and propaganda of copyright infringement. Further, another foreign author tried to contact him personally, but in the same way received a cart of laws. In the meantime, the English-speaking part of the fandom artists decided to write an official letter of complaint, attaching all links to posts to be deleted, and listing the authors with whose content the character T is strictly prohibited from interacting in the future. This letter was tried to be sent by a German artist, who specially registered there, but she stumbled upon some tech difficulties. Firstly, she was blocked by the owner of the stealing community, where the character T was appointed as the moderator. Her page was empty, the name was not Russian - he thought it was a bot, I can understand that. She then dropped the complaint letter to the support of VK social itself. Even tried to message the stealing community specifically but another lag made it impossible. (and this was required according to the new "rules" of the character T, according to which it was decided to play. "So that your complaint was considered ..." and so on.)...

Sensing something is wrong, character T made an attempt to contact some Russian-speaking authors himself in the meantime. And they told him the same -- that he steals, and not “shares” for some “purpose”. And here comes an interesting thing: the phrases "well, something needs to be posted to fill the community" and "but I am not on their Facebooks, I found it on Yandex"(that's russian google). That is, our drawings turned out to be just a filler, because something needs to be posted. Searching by image is difficult, but he still has to post! Something. Anything. What for? I have an explanation and an answer to this, but since this is the purpose of the character T - to draw attention to his fan-creation, I will not mention it 👌🏻 Another of his phrases was that due to the increased attention to his community now he HAS to credit the authors 🤦🏻‍♀. In general, he banned the Russian-speaking artist, whom he contacted and received a well-scented bucket’s content on his head (and well-deserved of course).

Now let's return to the official letter of complaint from foreign artists, which never reached the stealing community, and after all it was sent by the Russian-speaking author L. This time the character T was able to read it, but as expected, he refused to remove reposts, said that the artists were arrogant, accused of gatekeeping and again expressed his intention to repost not only without permission, but also against the will of all these fandom authors (38 people). After all, he has a great goal - to popularize games and the universe in the ru-segment.

The same or the next day the owner of the stealing community contacted me (who had previously lost interest, abandoned it, and a year later gave it to the character T). The owner asked what was happening, I explained, and passed on the letter of complaint from foreign artists, which the German artist could not send because he blocked her. That I explained to him too and he unblocked her. No reaction to my explanations abot the character T followed, but we’ll come back to that later.

And now we decided it’s time for our last resort -- we contacted Nicolas (the main screenwriter, the owner of the rights to this universe and the main figure of the fandom as a whole). Here I will digress from the main line and note that interested people have dug out both the provisions of the Berne Convention and the laws of the Russian Federation, which the character T chose to ignore in his activities, hiding behind only those that are convenient for him. Now let's return to Nicolas, who had to take a break from vacation because of this circus. As it turned out, character T, sensing the smoke, came running to him first. But alas, Nicolas was on the side of the authors (who would have thought). As a result, we almost decided that hurray, it helped, because posts with pictures disappeared from the wall of the stealing community, and character T even disappeared from the list of moderators (I will return to the stage with the owner of the community: I assume it was his work). But it was clear that it was too early to celebrate the victory.

Change of location: again the server of the developers on Discord. After the kick of the character T, three days later, a brand-new account appears, which broadcasts about the character T in the third person using Google translate “ if he had not been pressed upon, he would repost peacefully in his community of a thousand subscribers. And now he will attract some audience of a dozen more groups and will repost there too”. Naturally, without direct evidence of the second coming, no one have kicked him yet.

On the same day, the VK support told me that the most effective weapon in our case is the DMCA form. This is inconvenient, but it works. Moreover, the stolen has already been removed from the stealing community.

Then people came across the news - the stealing community advertised a new community of the character T, which was shaped exclusively for reposting other people's drawings (and there were already several works, including mine). The adv post called to support the character T “and his work”. Naturally, in the comments, I and other people urged not to support this. We even managed to explain the situation to some random person. After that the post was deleted. We don't know who deleted the post (still the character T or the community owner).

At this point, I ask Nicolas to message the tharacter T again using the simplest words that reposts cannot be allowed without permission. At all. Even with links attached. Doesn't help because the main now-not-stealing community shares a new post of the new one stealing community again. That is, even the main copyright holder and owner of the entire thing is not a figure of authority for the character T. Summing up -- “I will “popularize” your fandom against your wishes. The laws allow me. "

But after a while, the reblog from the new community is removed from the main one.

And again, the change of location: to the discord of the developers, where the character T himself comes back and writes something (under the new name ofc as his old account is banned). He declares that he will now repost to some huge audience of 300k people (before that there were 200, and even before that 100, yeah), he is outraged by the complaint letter from the authors with the ban on reposting, he will deliberately not credit, and also he wants to reupload my fanfiction somewhere. After that, he was kicked again 🥾.

Naturally, the entire audience is shocked, the character T literally became famous and crowned himself with a clown wig in just a few days, and now the entire fandom and the informed ru-segment hates him. The retelling is over.

Almost. Now I thank google translate for the help above and I'm gonna retell even more without it as this information is rather new. He wrote his own “explanation post”, where he somehow found relevant addressing the sexuality of one of the authors who called him out, called Nico indifferent and passive regarding this situation, insulted literally everyone but him, the white knight, whom we all should be grateful to for his will of promoting our content. I facepalm very hard. And he reposts art to some small communities but no one gives a shit (surprisingly so, huh?). He adds the links to the authors. Now I don’t want to give him any attention anymore, I have some work to get done.

Here comes the part about the and for community itself (google translate helps me again):

For the artists:

For the people registered in VK there is a "Nemesis" algorithm (dropdown - report - copied content). It will want a link to the previously published content on the VK as a primary source. Its effectiveness is still in question, but if someone tried it, then share your experience. For the rest, there is a dmca form that wants passport data (the only one I know of that asks for it), which I personally do not want to share, but in general... It's up to you to decide. Advice: Include readable text with @ of your page, community or yourself in your watermarks. Thus, an adequate person will always see where to go for the primary source.

For the readers/viewers:

Fandom existence is based on respect for other people's work. This work is the reason fandoms exist. If you like the drawing, then praise the author, support them in accessible ways (like - comment - subscribe - send a link to a friend(reblog the thing) - give some moneyz). People will be pleased, honestly. And if you disagree with something or you go "Ew" for other reasons, then just walk by. This is, in fact, all that you can do. If you have ambitions, ideas and “I need to fill my dead community with something” (you are considering taking the author's drawing and placing it somewhere yourself), then you ask for permission and accept any answer. There is no other way. Otherwise it's a violation of the law.

Why reposts (= re-uploads) are harmful I think there's no need to mention, but still:

First of all, it drives away traffic from the authors. It doesn't matter if fanart can be monetized or not (spoiler alert: it can). Example: If a figurative reposter hadn't taken away figurative content, then a potential viewer interested in this content would go to search for it himself. And would have found it posted by the author. And then it is already possible to take a closer look at the other work as a whole, and even give the author money so that they draw something personalized for this viewer personally. That’s an example. It seems to be clear. Artists on the Internet care about their traffic, which is responsible for audience growth and all subsequent opportunities. This is the basics.

About monetizing fan content.

It depends solely on the developers / authors of games and books (original owners of all rights). Sometimes the ban on monetization hangs for some time after the release of the game (as was the case with Hades), sometimes you can sell keychains / posters / whatever with fanarts on them right away. And sometimes you can't, everything is individual here. Again, I think it is clear that if a viewer finds the original image posted by the author themselves, then this viewer has more chances to buy merch with this image. After all, the author will definitely add that the drawing is available as a merch. Reposter -- never. He does not know that, he found it on Yandex/Google.

Specifically about me and my community:

You know that my main audience are not russians. I have already abandoned my russian community once. Would I want to disappear from there again? So far, there is no such desire. People I have there are nice and friendly, despite the small number. How much do I really care about reposts of drawings on an objectively dying or already dead fandom? I'll leave it to you to decide. I have been here since the 2016-17, with me the fan activity started, and with me it will end. Everyone who is interested in SureAI games knows me. And although I have the permission from the devs to monetize fanart and fan content in general, it is obvious that $20 from posters and magnets every few months is not my motivation. I am here because I love the game universe and its characters. I make my own thing, quietly rejoicing, and I don't look around much. Reposts are evil on a different level, and not on this one. Does T's intention of re-uploading my fanfiction or even rewriting it somehow thrills me? I don’t care at all. Let him read a well edited and thought-through text for once. But I doubt it will help a little.

In general:

My subscribers / readers / followers know where to look for my updates. A thinking person that sees a repost will go and find the author themselves. Be it pictures that they see, text or something else. Those people who don't think are obviously not interesting for me as an audience. Other authors share this position.

Finally, end of this text. It has taken me 4 hours to write this all in russian, maybe another one to edit the google output and add more things AND almost one week of my time to deal with this all (and don’t forget other authors involved, they spent a shitload of time on it too). From now on my position is “time is money” and if the character T resurfaces he’ll have to pay me for the attention he seeks, lol

#enderal #sureai #art theft #reposters #5 pages on google docs #goddamnit #nehrim

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painted-crow · 4 years ago

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Fictional double Birds, webcomics edition!

I found/rediscovered some more Bird characters for y'all~

These pals are all webcomic characters, so you can read their stories for free :D the name headers link to the first page of their respective comics!

Just a reminder, clicking the images gives you better quality and can make the text easier to read. I've put alt text on the images with the relevant info--sorry if this still isn't the most accessible post. ^^;

Henry Jekyll (The Glass Scientists)

Thanks to @aubade-things for reminding me this comic exists, and for discussing it with me! I binged the whole thing a few days ago, haha.

The Glass Scientists is a webcomic about a haven society for mad scientists, in a world that does not like them. Jekyll here is trying to keep it from falling apart, but between mad science shenanigans, plain old lack of funding, and a fellow called Hyde who is definitely not the same person, who told you that, he's... uh... struggling.

Jekyll screams Badger secondary at first, his Bird secondary is just VERY burnt.

He idealizes Badger as a huge part of how he thinks a Proper Gentleman should be, and he has this super uptight Badger performance that does noooot actually make him happy.

His primary's shaky, too, but he's working on it. This just about says it all, honestly:

Yes, that is a figment of his own imagination yelling at him for using Bird secondary to sort out a major piece of his system.

Jekyll is peak "person who looks like they have their shit together but is actually a mess underneath" and I'd be okay with him being a little less relatable thank you very much

He is slowly reclaiming his secondary though:

Sidenote: I have had almost that exact experience, about the same topic, during a period where I'd burned Bird secondary.

(Seven year old Paint was obsessed with the idea of plant medicine. You know how some kids mix up "potions" with stuff from their back yard? I wanted mine to work. I had this giant textbook about it and everything.)

Alas, remembering was less useful to me; all it really gave me was an extra uncanny experience reading this webcomic :p

Thistle (Daughter of the Lilies)

Thistle is a cinnamon roll hiding a whoooooole lot of trauma and anxiety. I'll let you find those panels for yourself, though. Instead, here she is entertaining some children with her magic:

Sometimes she sounds like a Badger primary, but she's a full-fledged Bird:

Her secondary is a little singed, too, but hers is WAY better off than Jekyll's. She's doin ok.

Spoiler warning: the current comic arc shows her face, which is a major reveal--so if you want to puzzle out what her deal is on your own, start from the beginning and avoid the front page for now ^^

She's also super relatable, but in a way that doesn't bug me. I'm trying to figure out why Jekyll does... I think it's that he's an example of a very burnt Bird secondary that looks seriously familiar to me, but his primary is unstable too and I find that unnerving--I've never burned mine. To me, he feels deeply unhealthy in a way that Thistle doesn't at all. Thistle's morality is very clear and bright; the parts of her system she struggles with most are about how she sees herself, but I deal with the same thing (it's probably less common for Birds not to) so that's fine.

That does say something about the general tone of the two stories. DotL deals with some heavy topics, but it's a much more optimistic feeling world with a much more stable protagonist.

DotL fights with Girl Genius for rank as my favorite webcomic, period. Everyone should go read it, it's beautiful and funny and relatable and tragic and then it's funny again. Also there are dragons! At least one of them is plot relevant, and several of the pages he's on got turned into posters by popular demand because the art is just that good.

Speaking of Girl Genius:

Gilgamesh Wulfenbach (Girl Genius)

Girl Genius is a gaslamp fantasy comedy adventure romance about mad scientists, and it does all of those things really well at the same time. Perhaps unsurprisingly, it's a goldmine for Bird secondaries.

This story has also been adapted into ebook and audiobook versions, so if comics are hard for you to read, that could be a more accessible option!

Snake primary is the most popular (Agatha, Tarvek, Zeetha, Bang, Krosp, Lars, and most of the Jagers) but there are a few Birds hanging around. The Baron is a Bird primary, I think, and Othar is some form of Exploded Idealist (double Lion?) but I'm going to focus on Gil because he's a main character.

The page that cements his primary for me is this one, where he's arguing with Snake primary Zeetha (who is Loyal to Agatha). Agatha's been the victim of some weird mind control stuff by the story's BBEG, but Gil hasn't gotten that context yet and the Baron (his dad) is convinced Agatha IS the BBEG.

And yes, he's technically pantsless in this scene but hasn't realized that yet either. It's not his fault... the "ability to rant" part of a Spark's brain wakes up long before their situational awareness does.

Also lol @ Zeetha's reaction. Gil is one of Agatha's Important People, and Agatha is Zeetha's, so he's safe, for now, if he behaves.

As for his secondary:

And:

Like many of the cast, Gil is a Spark and very vulnerable to nerd sniping. RIP his lost sleep.

Also mine, actually. I'm gonna end this here and try to go back to bed ^^;

Happy reading!

#sortinghatchats #meta #ravenclaw primary #ravenclaw secondary #burned ravenclaw secondary #paint speaks #q

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babybluebex · 4 years ago

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daisy pt.2 [spencer reid]

pairing: spencer reid x fem reader (y/n)

summary: part 2 to daisy, partial rewrite of “someone’s watching”

word count: 2400+

warnings: season 1 reid, baby’s a dickhead but we forgive him, pregnancy tw

a/n: i’m gonna keep writing this series for a while, so buckle up. i hope you all like it! thanks for the support on the past parts, it means a lot. maybe a lesley smith-judiment thing in the future?

When I woke up, I felt off. Maybe “icky” was the right word, but I wasn’t sure. It was a feeling that I wasn’t familiar with, and I didn’t know if I liked it or not. I couldn’t pinpoint any specific reason I felt weird; it was more of an overall feeling.

Spencer was already awake, drinking coffee and reading the newspaper. I rubbed my head with exhaustion, and Spencer smiled when he saw me. “Hey there,” he said softly, moving the newspaper to the side. He liked starting the day off by talking to me, and I usually sat in his lap for that conversation. He woke up much earlier and much quicker than I did, so I took the time to wake up. “You slept pretty good.”

“You could say that,” I chuckled, my voice rough. “You?”

Spencer shrugged. “Nightmare,” he said nonchalantly. “Nothing unusual.”

“Aw, love,” I mumbled. “Why didn’t you wake me up?”

“You were sleeping so well,” Spencer told me. “You obviously needed it.” His eyes were shining as he looked at me, and I pushed my hair behind my ear.

“But that’s why I’m dating you,” I sighed. “Remember? This only started so that you would have someone to wake up to when you had nightmares.”

“I thought this started because you hated sleeping alone,” Spencer stated, quirking an eyebrow. I knew he was right, but I still waved my hand dismissively.

“Whatever,” I said. “But you still need to wake me up when you have a bad dream. Please?”

Spencer sighed dramatically. “Fine,” he said. “If you say so.”

“I do say so,” I told him and kissed the tip of his nose. “C’mon, we’ve got a long day.”

Spencer and I got ready hastily, and, when we got to the police precinct for Los Angeles county, I was blown away by the sheer size of it. It was nearly as big as our building back at Quantico, and we served the entire country; this was one county’s police department. Spencer must have seen how surprised I was, because he locked his pinky with mine. “Los Angeles county is home to about 10 million people on average,” Spencer told me. “The county itself incorporates 88 cities, each with its own police precinct. This one oversees the whole of the department.”

“How many people work here?” I asked, because I knew that Spencer would know.

“About 12 thousand,” Spencer answered. “My lecture is to about 100 people, at least one representative from every city in the county.”

“Are you nervous?” I asked.

Spencer shrugged. “A little,” he said, but I knew him too well. A ‘little’ nervous for Spencer was a ‘lot’ nervous for everyone else. I might even go as far as to say that he was scared. I could see it in his eyes.

“You’ll be great, Dr. Reid,” I told him. “I know you will.”

“Would you mind sitting in?” Spencer asked. “Just in the back, so I have a familiar face.”

“Oh, babe,” I mumbled. “I have work to do. I’ll try my best, but I can’t promise anything.”

“The promise is enough for me,” Spencer told me.

We were separated almost as soon as we entered the building, and I met up with JJ. She had had a lecture the day before on a new network that the LAPD would be using, and she had stayed behind to stay in a place that wasn’t Virginia for a while. “Hey, JJ,” I started. “Do I seem… Different to you?”

“What d’ya mean?” She asked.

“Just, I don’t know,” I said. “I feel weird today. Just making sure I didn’t look off or anything.”

“Weird how?” JJ asked.

I shrugged. “Like…” I began, struggling to find words to articulate how I felt. “Kinda nauseous. Not like I’m gonna throw up right now, but it’s sorta lingering in the back of my throat. And I feel heavy; like, really, really bloated. I didn’t eat breakfast because I didn’t want to feel even worse. Do you think I have the flu or something?”

JJ smiled at me and gently laid her hand on my arm. “Y/N,” she said. “I felt like that a lot too. It’ll pass; it’s still early.”

My brain didn’t quite comprehend what JJ had said. “I’m sorry, what?” I said, blinking quickly.

“I recommend crackers,” JJ told me. “It’s the only thing I could keep down the first and second trimesters.”

“What?” I yelped. “JJ, I’m not pregnant!”

“Are you sure?” JJ asked. “When was your last period?”

“I have an implant, I don’t get periods anymore,” I explained. “Like, I get spotting sometimes, but that hasn’t happened for a few months.”

“When was the last time you and Spence had sex?” JJ asked.

I clenched my jaw. “Last night,” I answered. “Before we went to that art exhibit with Gideon.”

“Did you use protection?” JJ asked.

“I’m not a child, JJ,” I said. “I would know if I was pregnant. Anyway, don’t you think Spencer of all people would know before any of us?”

“Sometimes his judgment is a little clouded with you,” JJ said slowly. “He doesn’t always see things. But, Y/N, what you’re describing to me is a textbook case of morning sickness. And you haven’t thrown up?”

“No,” I whispered. “JJ, holy shit. Am I…? Could I be…? Fuck!”

JJ turned to where her purse sat behind her, and she dug around in it for a moment before passing me a wad of bills. “There’s a drugstore about a block from here,” she told me. “While Spence is in his lecture, go down there and get a test.”

“I told him I’d sit in on the lecture,” I protested, but I held onto the money all the same.

“It won’t take long, sweetheart,” JJ said. “I know you’re nervous, but knowing sooner is better than not knowing at all.”

I nodded in agreement. I stuffed the money into the pocket of my jacket and swallowed thickly, and I went in search of my fiance. After asking Morgan about his whereabouts, I quickly found him sitting in a quiet corner, reading and chewing at pretzels. It didn’t surprise me that he somehow had located a snack machine. “Hey, babe,” I sighed. “I, uh… I’m wrapped up in something right now, and I’m not sure I’ll make the lecture.”

“Really?” Spencer asked, closing his book. “What’s going on?”

“Umm…” I began. It didn’t feel fair to keep this suspicion from Spencer, since, if I was pregnant, it was as much his child as mine, so I took a deep breath. “Don’t freak out yet, because I don’t know for sure,” I started. “But JJ just told me that I might be… And I’m gonna go get a test to be sure, but--”

“Y/N,” Spencer said, putting his hand on my shoulder. “Slow down. I’m not following.”

Boy, was that a first. I bit my bottom lip and my eyebrows knitted together, and I said, “Spence, I think I’m pregnant.”

The air was full of energy between us as Spencer digested the words I had said. His eyes fell to his book, then back to me, and he took a deep breath. He looked like he wanted to say something, but nothing came out. “I…” he started and cleared his throat. “I have to go.”

“Spencer!” I exclaimed. “Did you not hear what I said?”

“I have to go,” Spencer repeated, pulling his bag over his shoulder. “We’ll… We’ll talk later.” After a moment of obvious hesitation, he kissed my hair, and he left as quickly as I had arrived. Tears welled up in my eyes and a hot anger rushed to my neck, and I sat down heavily in the same chair that Spencer had abandoned. I wasn’t sure how Spencer would react to that, but leaving me with no explanation wasn’t one of the options that I had anticipated. My heart beat painfully slowly as my hands flexed and opened, trying to make sense of his reaction. I thought he would be happy. Did I have it all wrong? Had I missed some crucial part of him that should have keyed me into the fact that he didn’t want kids?

I didn’t get to ponder for much longer, because Gideon turned the corner. I frantically wiped my face dry, but my runny nose remained, and Gideon approached me. I had always seen him as a sort of father figure, and the hug he gave me said all that he needed to. I cried into his shoulder, and I couldn’t help but mumble, “What did I do wrong?”

“Reid, I need you to go to Lila Archer’s and give her some protection,” Gideon said. “She’s not safe alone.”

“Why me?” Spencer asked. “Why not Morgan? He could do a better job at protecting her.”

“You’re closer to her age,” Gideon told him. “She’ll be more comfortable with you.”

Spencer nodded and looked down at his hands. I sat next to him as I always did, but it was icy. I wanted to speak to him and ask him just what he thought he was doing, but I bit my tongue. Anger would hardly do anything to solve this. “Can, umm, can Y/N come with me?” Spencer asked. “She knows Lila on a quasi-personal level. It might help comfort her.”

“If she’s alright with it,” Gideon said, looking at me.

I lowered my gaze to the table, tapping my pencil lightly against my folders. “Sure,” I said.

“Good,” Gideon said. “Don’t tact-gear up, and bring a single weapon.” A moment passed, and Gideon said, “Y/N, you--”

Pregnant women weren’t permitted to carry weapons. I already knew what Gideon was asking of me. “Yeah,” I said and twisted around to undo the holster around my belt. My neck seized up and I grunted, and Spencer’s long fingers quickly helped me remove it. The room and the rest of the BAU were quiet as this exchange happened and, when my gun and holster hit the table, Hotch said, “Y/N? Gideon just said--”

“I know what Gideon said, Hotch,” I replied. “But there are… Circumstances.”

“Like?” Hotch asked. “Anything we should know or worry about?”

I shrugged. “No,” I said. “I mean…” I looked at Spencer, who was very adamantly avoiding my gaze, and I cleared my throat. “No. Nothing.”

“Uh-huh,” Morgan said smoothly. “How far along are you?”

“Excuse me?” I snapped.

“Irritability is one of the most common side effects of pregnancy,” Morgan said. “And you’re really clingy; a nesting instinct with the father. That’s an animal kingdom thing, I think.”

I bit my tongue so harshly that I was afraid I would sever it in two. “Morgan,” I said sharply. “Shut. Up.”

“Am I wrong?” Morgan asked innocently. “God, I’m sorry, I just assumed-- And you look like you’ve gained a little weight--”

“Derek!”

“Jesus Christ!”

“You don’t say that to a woman!”

I felt the tears come back, and I cleared my throat. “Can we move on?” I asked Gideon.

“No,” Spencer said suddenly. His jaw was set, his gaze hard on the table before us, and he finally looked at me. He had his usual dark purple bags around his eyes, but they were rimmed red and full of tears. Without another word, Spencer took my hand and pulled me from my seat, and he led me out of the small briefing room.

“Spencer, let go,” I mumbled. “Your hand-- Spence!”

He only stopped once we were outside the building, safely nestled in the empty smoking spot. His hand remained in a death grip on my wrist, and I finally tugged my hand away. The skin was sore and I rubbed it as I asked, “What the fuck was that?”

“My mom has schizophrenia,” Spencer said suddenly. “She’s been institutionalized since I was eighteen. That sort of thing is genetic, and I’ve been tested, but the test-- The doctor couldn’t give me a straight answer. I don’t want to have a baby if it means that I can pass that onto them, I can’t do that to someone else. I’m sorry, I didn’t mean to walk away, but that scared me as bad as it scared you. I know what it’s like to be afraid of your own mind, and I wouldn’t wish that on anyone.”

I was quiet. Too many thoughts were racing through my head, and I absently rubbed my sore wrist. “Spence,” I whispered. “How did I not know that?”

“I’ve never told anybody before,” Spencer said. “It’s… Terrifying. I don’t want to think about it.”

“And that’s why you…” I started and trailed off.

“I didn’t know how to react,” Spencer said. “I needed time to think about it, and removing myself from the situation seemed to be the best option.”

“Not when this is the situation, my love,” I said softly. I reached out for him, but he sharply backed away from me. I respected that he didn’t want any contact, and I added, “I’m so sorry.”

“No!” Spencer cried. His hair fell from behind his ears as he suddenly jumped forward and captured my body in his arms, and he buried his face in my neck. “No, don’t you dare say that you’re sorry. You have nothing to be sorry about. If anything, I’m sorry for just leaving like that.”

“Spence, please,” I whispered, my voice shaking. “Stop apologizing. I’m not mad anymore.”

Spencer nodded slowly, and I moved us to a concrete bench to sit down. I held his hands in mine and soothed my thumb up and down his large hand, looking at him. He was a human, as much as I was and as much as the being inside of me was. “So, this is it, huh?” Spencer chuckled as he sniffled. “I’m gonna be a dad.”

“Yes,” I said gently. “If you want to be. I understand if you don’t.”

“Are you kidding me?” Spencer asked. When he lifted his head, I saw his cheeks pink and his eyes wet, but he had a huge smile on his face. His hands came up to clutch my head and he kissed me, long and deep and lovingly. “Y/N, you are giving me something that I’ve dreamt of for so long. I can’t-- I don’t know how to express to you what this means to me.”

#mgg #matthew gray gubler #spencer reid #reid #criminal minds #raymond #southern gothic #paul #500 days of summer #chip #68 kill #lesley smith-judiment #hot air #american actor #fanfiction #mine

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sazandorable · 4 years ago

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things I wanna see in ace fanworks!

It’s Ace Week!

And there’s huge variety among the aspec community (spectrum! that’s what it means!), so here’s a post about a variety of things I’d love to see more in fanworks involving asexual characters!

(I’m especially thinking of Jon from The Magnus Archives and Zolf from Rusty Quill Gaming, but this should easily apply across fandoms!)

I’ll try not to repeat it every line but: blanket disclaimer that this is very much a “what I feel, what I want, me, personally” post. Others (including other asexual people) might feel differently, and that’s perfectly okay. That’s kind of the point of this post! This is absolutely not a “here’s the one correct way to write all ace characters that all ace people will enjoy and agree with” Rules post — on the contrary, this is partly in reaction to seeing other people say that they dislike seeing, or don’t dare create, things that I, personally… desperately want to see, actually.

CW: this post will contain references to many common sources of trauma for asexual people, such as aphobia, partner abuse and rape, as well as sex (in general and sometimes in specifics) and asexual people having sex.

So! I, personally, love and would love to see more...

Fanworks by all sorts of asexual creators

No matter what your specific experience is, it is important, and your getting to create and share art about it is important, and you deserve to get that, and there are people interested in seeing it. And the same is true for all the other aces with different experiences, too.

Variety! Room for all of us! Share your experience happily, and let other aces happily share theirs!

Fanworks by allosexual creators

I’m so happy you’re interested in asexuality and in depicting it! I do want my experience to be normalised and seen as a normal thing that anyone can find interesting and relatable, even allosexual people. If you don’t mean to be an asshole about it, if you’re generally interested in exploring asexuality and you’re doing it from the heart, thinking of asexual people as people — then I want to see it, and I want you to be able to give a try to creating or consuming whatever you want, and I do not want you to be attacked for doing it.

Of course, you might still unwittingly fuck up, and people might still get hurt, and truly hurtful things should still be pointed out in order to be improved on; but I want us as a community to help creators up instead of shouting down, and I hope you continue putting thought into creating fanworks involving ace characters.

Keep reading for some tips and suggestions of things to think about, to keep in mind and to look into to improve your representing of us and our experience of it!

Extremely specific, different, kinda weird, niche, Problematic™ content, from creators of any identity (including questioning!), who are wary about sharing it because they think that there’s no audience for it, or that they’re not allowed, or that it’s a bad and evil way to represent asexuality

I want to see that, I’d be thrilled if you did it, I hope you do it, and I want a fandom environment in which you can do that safely because you deserve to. Of course, make sure to provide good tagging and CW!

Awareness that asexuality is a wide varying spectrum of experiences and there is no One Correct or More Valid Way to depict it

Awareness that even people with the same identity, label and life experiences might want to create or consume different things

Permission for everyone to create whatever they like, so long as it’s just done earnestly

No shaming, gatekeeping, accusations of fetishising, etc.

There are newbie writers who will never learn if they’re scared away from trying; there are people who haven’t yet figured out that they are in fact ace and never will if they’re not allowed to explore it safely; there are ace people who consume ace content to feel good about themselves; there are ace people who create ace fic in order to explore complicated, hard, unpleasant experiences and feelings; there are ace people whose experiences do not match stereotypical narratives I’ve most seen brandished around, and those people are just as ace and just as allowed to create and consume whatever they want; I do not want to foster a fandom environment in which people must out themselves and offer up their experience to scrutiny in order to be “allowed” to write certain topics; etc., etc.

Over the past two years, I’ve regularly seen a lot of yelling along the lines of “this work includes x and not x because this character is ace!” or “this fic I just read is the only valid ace fic” or “oh my god everyone look at this, this is the perfect ace fic”. A lot of it comes from a place of defensiveness and/or pride, ace people happy and proud to share something that was, finally, pinning down their experience. That’s awesome! ... For them. There are plenty of other asexual people who don’t relate to or enjoy those narratives — in fact, all the ones I’m thinking of squicked me hard, despite being made by ace creators and accurate to (an) ace experience, and I would be really unhappy if all ace fanworks was like those. Meanwhile, plenty of stuff I enjoy gets accusations of being fetishising.

So it would do a world of wonder for me and my experience of ace fanworks if those things could be internalised by the fandom as a whole!

Clear distinction between “being asexual” and “not interested in sex”, ”sex-repulsed” or “not having sex”

Those can and often do overlap, but the word “asexual” just means “experiencing little or no sexual attraction”!

In fanworks about an ace character, the two are generally linked and the reason a character doesn’t want to have sex tends to be that they’re ace, but the shorthand and immediate assumption that “being ace” automatically and always means “never having sex” or “hating the concept of sex” always feels a little weird to me.

This goes both ways — even if your aspec character is very sexually active and enjoys it, or if they’re demisexual and currently experiencing attraction to their partner, etc. — they’re still a person who experiences little to no sexual attraction in their daily life, they’re still aspec in a way that can be depicted and that I can be made to feel.

On AO3, widespread use of the tag “Canon Asexual Character”…

There are different views on the “correct” way to use that tag, in part because… what's the point of it? Should we use it in every single fic in which the Archivist appears, because he happens to be ace in the canon, even if it doesn’t come up in the fic?

IMO, it is helpful — it indicates to me that the author wrote their story with that character’s asexuality in mind, and it informed their writing of that character. Personally, I use it on fics where it feels “relevant” even if it doesn’t come up, such as a fic from Martin’s POV about Jon not being very touchy-feely (even though it doesn’t specify that that is because Jon is ace), but not a fic from Jon’s POV in which they’re happily living together but it’s not about the physical specifics of their relationship (even though in my head that relationship is non-sexual, but I could have written this specific fic the exact same way if Jon wasn’t ace).

The use or non-use of the tag can also simply help distinguish fanworks that were created and posted before that revelation, and did not depict that character as ace because the creator genuinely wasn’t aware of it.

… but also more detail than that, for instance: tagging the “shade of ace” the character is written as

A few examples:

#aroace Jon

#demisexual biromantic Jon

#greysexual nonbinary Jon

#sexually active kinky asexual Jon

#sex-positive low-libido Jon

#touch-averse Jon

#sex-uninterested ace demiromo Jon in happy QPR with Martin

#sex-repulsed sub Jon gets creative

#aspec Jon experiences sexual attraction for the first time and it’s for freaking Elias of all people oh God oh no

etc., etc.

Those are VERY different things! There’s some I’d be delighted to read, some I’m not interested in, and some that would actively squick me personally for personal reasons but I can think of some friends of mine that would be super happy to see it.

If you don’t know or aren’t sure of the exact terms, or if you wrote a relatively broad scenario and want to let people project any labels on it, you can also just describe what the situation is or how you depicted your character relating to things. That’s still very helpful. For instance:

#Jon doesn’t like kissing but cuddles good

#the struggle of NOT liking touching but craving intimacy

#Jon and Tim pointing at each other like spiderman meme, same hat?? how??

#Daisy and Basira have no idea how to explain their relationship and it’s none of your business

#Zolf is just tired and wants people to stop prying into his love life

etc., etc.

More awareness that there’s plenty of stuff about the ace experience that, while very common, can be squicky or even traumatic, and more tagging/warning about that

Here’s some other things that are common to the ace experience and commonly depicted in fanworks involving ace characters, and that can be genuinely upsetting and potentially triggering and traumatic, whether or not an ace person has encountered it in their own life (lots of CWs in this list, obviously):

encountering aphobia, even clueless and well-meaning

having internalised aphobia, aphobic thoughts, self-hatred, feeling broken or strange

social pressure to have sex or relationships, people being invasive or judgy about others’ love life, feeling disconnected from allo people

trying things out just to see

having sex

enjoying sex

forcing themself to have sex

referring to past sexual experiences as something that they didn’t enjoy

being emotionally pressured into having sex

wanting to please their partner despite not desiring sex

feeling an obligation to satisfy their partner

the prospect of romantic rejection for their asexuality

the idea that they must earn love

the idea that getting their boundaries respected is something exceptional and rare and an incredible sacrifice from their partner

being sexualised by someone else or the object of someone’s fantasies

wanting sex or experiencing sexual attraction for the first time

etc., etc.

Two concepts here that are both simultaneously true: 1) those are indeed very common to the real life experience of ace people, 2) it is possible to depict the ace experience without tackling any of that.

Of course, you can have all that! You can create content about that! That’s very relatable for a lot of people, and that last one, for instance, can in fact be an accurate and important depiction of demisexuality. But it’s also not a given that a fictional work about asexuality will/should depict it, and not a given that all ace people looking for ace content will want to see any item from that list. So please, give content warnings for all that, too.

It would be a tremendous help in curating and improving my experience if this could become a widespread habit — I have lost count of the amount of fics tagged as fluffy that I had to backbutton out because they suddenly threw in something really depressing that I, personally, didn’t want to see happen to a character I project on (while other readers found catharsis, validation and kinship in seeing their experience represented accurately!).

If it does come up, tags about what comes up

Beyond the content warnings for clearly traumatic stuff, is there “#Discussion of asexuality”? Is it “#Coming out as asexual”, or “#Jon discovers the existence of asexuality”? Is there “#Acephobia” (“#Accidental”? “#Casual”? “#Internalised”?)? Is there “#Explanation of asexuality to a clueless partner”, or “#Jon’s partner tells him about asexuality”? Is there “#Relationship negotiation”?

Since, again, not all aces have the same experience, odds are that some people will JUMP happily on content depicting a specific experience which they relate to... and inversely: again, there’s some of that which I personally do not relate to and actively do not want to read.

Detailed tagging is a huge help for me to figure out if a fic about asexuality is going to squick me and make me sad for the evening because ah I am weird after all even amongst my brethren, or if it’s going to be, finally, my heart’s desire, what I’ve been craving for, and make my entire week. (Sidenote, thanks to good tagging I did find the perfect QPR fic I’d been yearning to read last week and I’m still thinking about it right now and so, so, so happy.)

Making it clear when an ace character is going to be having sex — beyond just the ship tag and rating

Reminder that a fic rating alone does not necessarily mean sex! A fic tagged just “#JonMartin” and rated Explicit could have them in a relationship and then an explicitly detailed scene in which Jon dies a excruciatingly gruesome death, or a graphic scene of Martin having some solo fun, or even another character, or a sex scene between another tagged ship.

With smut involving an ace character as with everything else, there are lots of us that do want to see it (for a wide variety of reasons), and obviously there are lots of us that desperately want to avoid it (but might be in the Explicit tag looking for smut involving other ships, or horror or whump content, etc.) — please help us know whether to click or not click!

The normalisation of not expecting/forcing anyone to do things they don’t actively want to do

There’s a relatively common thing in heartwarming ace fic where the ace character is surprised that their allo partner is fine with dating without having sex and the partner goes, “I love you, of course I’m fine with that” and the ace character is all oh, oh, oh I am loved and respected, did not expect that. Or an allo character saying “That’s fine, I don’t make you do anything you don’t want to do,” or “I don’t want to do anything unless you’re into it!”

And I see how it sounds nice and romantic. It probably is to many people. But it can also be extremely sinister and anxiety-inducing in its implications: what if the partner didn’t love the ace character quite that much? What did the ace character expect? If this is amazing and rare, then what was the baseline expectation? If this ace character has dated before, what were their past relationships like, for this to be surprising?

I end up running into it more in fluffy fanworks about asexuality than in fanworks that aren’t. Again — you can absolutely do that, but please tag/warn for it; even if it’s just in passing, in fluff fic it’s really not something I expect from the genre. Even though I might sometimes be specifically in the mood to read an exploration of that, in dark fic or in hurt/comfort fic!

And now for more specific stuff I wanna see in stories:

This last bit is intended as both an encouragement for people who want to create these things and think there’s no audience (there is!!), and as a box of ideas for people who have no idea how to depict the asexuality of characters but want to :3 Again, this is not in any way a statement that these are The Only Correct Way, or even things that all aspec people want to see, nor is it a diss at people who create, consume or want the exact opposite of these things — for that matter, some of the items on this list are mutually exclusive. It’s just my own tastes and literally just stuff I personally would love to see (more).

Ace character being single, happy to be single, and happily ace

Asexuality being written in but a complete non-issue, not discussed, not brought up, not even to reassure the ace character that It Is Fine

Ace character being flippant and snarky about their asexuality, making jokes and memes about it

Ace character not caring about other people’s perception of them at all

Ace character feeling only pride and happiness and comfort about that label

More than one ace character! Extra love for them having some similarities and also some differences!

Intersectionality: ace character being also aro, trans, nonbinary, bi or pan, polyamorous, kinky, a drag queen, a dom or sub, neurodivergent, disabled, non-white, … ; asexuality being just one part of their identity

Asexuality being queer and belonging to the LGBT+ community in itself; a character being cis, aro or heteroromantic, and ace, and “counting” as “queer enough”

Flirty ace character

Confident, self-comfortable ace character

Ace character considering their specific experience to be perfectly normal and not unique, if not typical

Ace character enjoying something that is commonly considered to be sexy or sexual, but it isn’t for them — such as wearing makeup or lingerie, going clubbing, pole-dancing, massages…

Ace character happily dating someone who is not aspec

I like the thought that it’s possible! I personally like this more than I like fanworks about two aspec people dating. I like it when the ace character is happy to adapt to their allo partner’s requirements and I like it when the allo character is happy to adapt to their ace partner’s requirements and I like it when there are things that just do not match perfectly and that doesn’t put an end to the relationship.

Ace character having a lot of experience dating

Partner(s) already knowing about asexuality and not needing to have it explained to them

Partners just being like “*shrug* okay”, without making it a big deal that they’re “giving up” sexual intercourse

Ace character crushing and getting flustered over physical but non-sexual aspects of their love interest’s looks

Big strong hands, nice jaw, strong nose, long eyelashes, lovely profile, silky hair, lovely eye-colour, delicate wrists, muscles, long legs, collar bone, shoulder blades, squishy stomach, peek of bellybutton, freckles, moles, scars, …

Ace character daydreaming about their love interest in ways that involve zero physical attraction, thoughts about how pretty or handsome they are, or desire to touch them

Jon pining for Martin and just wanting to talk with him, have tea with him, hang out with him… not seeing how Tim is good-looking but being attracted to his humour and nerdiness… missing his relationship with Georgie because it felt nice to cook together and share clothes and watch the telly together… Zolf missing Hamid’s fiery passion or Wilde’s awful puns… being attracted to Cel’s liveliness and inventiveness… being charmed by Azu’s emotional intelligence or her unwavering certainty in her faith…

Smut involving an ace character

No shaming of fellow real living people about that

Not going to go into it again because plenty of us have been talking about that in this fandom for two years now — bottom line is there do exist plenty of asexual people that 1) do have sex IRL, 2) do want to consume smut, can we please, as a community, move past the “this is not smut because this character is ace!” passive-aggressive attacks already. (“I depict this character as not having sex because he’s ace and I’m ace and it makes me happy” is fine! Just don’t imply that that’s the only way to be ace and that other people are wrong to want something else.)

Ace character enjoying sex

Ace character being completely neutral about having or not having sex

Ace character disliking sex in the same way they dislike, idk, coffee. No, absolutely not, thank you, no concession, not for me, but also it’s nothing traumatic or moral or uncomfortable.

Sex being just a thing, not a big deal, having or not having it not being all that important

Ace character enjoying the concept of sex, abstractly. Ace character consuming porn, writing porn, being fine discussing sex with friends, having a dirty mind — just not wanting to be involved in it

Ace character having fantasies that disturb them

Ace character feeling arousal and being just *shrug* about it, not particularly disgusted, just uninterested

Arousal, libido, or masturbation as something different and separate from sexual attraction and desire to sleep with someone or to be touched

Ace character being kinky af

Ace character having multiple partners and different sorts of relationships with each!

Open relationships

Non-sexual romantic relationships

Queerplatonic relationships

COMMITTED!!! NON-SEXUAL AND NON-ROMANTIC!!! PARTNERSHIPS!!! AAAAAA [sobbing emoji]

Non-sexual physical intimacy

Hand-holding! Playing footsie! Cuddles! Hugging! Kissing! Super heavy making out and getting aroused but no sex! Sharing a bed! Lying on top of each other! Bathing or showering together! Giving each other a haircut or a shave! Massages! Non-sexual nudity!

Non-physical intimacy

Committed couple having separate beds/rooms! Getting married! Being in love and not kissing or touching! Loving long-distance relationships! QPR! Affection and closeness expressed through speech, gifts, services, time, shared activities — wearing each other’s clothes, cooking together, long emotional conversations, trust and secrets, love letters, post-it notes, “thought of you” gifts, celebrating anniversaries with a candle-lit dinner, co-parenting...!

Sexual situations with no touching

(CW bit detailed:)

Sexting, cybersex, phone sex, dirty talking, reading or watching porn (alone or together), consensual voyeurism like watching their partner masturbate or have sex with someone else, kink using toys and accessories or scenes but with no actual touching, …

Romanticised consent and boundaries

An asexual character being super firm about what they do not want and their allo partner being thrilled about that trust and communication!! An allosexual partner trusting their asexual partner about what they want without infantilising them or doubting their capacity to establish their boundaries! “Wait, you always say you don’t like [x]?” “Yes, but I feel like it right now, as I assumed would be pretty clear from the fact that I am doing [x] right now :w” “Hey, just checking, sue me :w” “Yes, thank you :w”

Specific boundaries

Cheek kisses but no lip kisses, no PDA, not having sex where they’re also going to sleep, needing a shower immediately after sex, lights off only, …

(CW more detailed:)

… not caring about feeling or seeing their partner’s hard-on but not wanting to do anything about it, penetration but no oral, bottoming but not topping, giving a blowjob but not having their head held, being fine with extreme acts but not liking fluids, pet names but no dirty talk, dirty talk but no pet names, happy to pleasure their partner but not wanting to be touched, not wanting to come, being only into sex as part of extreme kink but not interested in vanilla sex, …

Shifting boundaries and consent

Ace character likes kissing or cuddles but only on their terms — they will come give their partner a kiss sometimes but bristle at being touched. Today is not a kissing day. Today this ace character is a bit down and would like a lot of physical affection and cuddling. Certain areas are off-limits for touching because this ace character is sensitive on their thighs, ticklish in their ribs, self-conscious about their scars. This ace character considers their chest non-sexual so that’s fine but do not pat their butt.

Today, exceptionally, this ace character is horny and feels like banging. Ace character feels like banging sometimes but is not in the mood right now, bye. Ace character feels like banging from eight to nine pm every second Thursday of the month, catch it or miss it. Couple shares a shower every morning and it’s never meant to be a sexual thing, but today the ace one is getting aroused and hey, you know what, they’d like to get off right now. This massage is fantastic but it’s getting overwhelming, so they ask to stop (but it was great!). Ace character is intrigued about this particular scenario/position/kink and wants to try it out, they do, it’s perfectly nice, but hmm, once was enough, they’re not interested in doing it again. Ace character sexts their partner all day but by the time their partner has got home, undressed and prepared and pulled out the strap, they’ve lost interest.

♠♥ Thank you for reading all this! Hope this inspires people so I get more stuff that makes me happy! ♥♠

#ace week #asexuality #representation #the magnus archives #rusty quill gaming #a lot more TMA than RQG though #writing #fanfiction #happy end of ace week everyone!

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steponmepinkjun · 4 years ago

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wow im literally the opposite. "i will continue loving the exact kind of things that i got bullied for in high school out of pure spite because if i let it get to me that it's not ""socially acceptable"" then they win and i Never Lose" kinda shit. i will stay here chanting MULGAMNORI MULGAMNORI MULGAMNORI like a lunatic and if anyone tries to judge me for it they best be running before i take over their sleep paralysis demon's job again. after kingdom im literally planning to stan all the groups on that show. they're all so talented and idc if them being so young yet so successful makes me feel shit abt my life! i will vicariously live thru their success and keep enjoying the absolute Bangers they keep dropping. but hey that's just me u do u bestie if anyone tries to come at you for liking kpop im here and im ready w them Facts they dont wanna confront (like the internalized racism and infantilization of asians that causes them to look down on kpop like it ain't just music in another language when they got way too turnt to despacito.) -felix bi anon

I mean realistically speaking—and we gonna shoutout to my therapist here—when it comes to how the world perceives me, I'm very much fixated on the control element of it. I like to think I'm very evolved and very dgaf (and in a lot of ways I am!) but the reality is more of the not really variety 😂 I can really only handle other people's perception of me if I feel like I can either guide it (through people pleasing) to be beneficial to me (by becoming what they want/need me to be) or by weaponizing it (for a number of years most of my outward identity was defined by going "oh you think I'm weird? Well, I don't know why you think that, and I don't know how to stop it, so if you think I'm weird I'll be the weirdest motherfucker you've ever seen, because FUCK YOU!").

If I can control the narrative, I'm fine with people thinking I'm weird—but subconsciously I can only handle it if they see me as the kind of weird I want to be seen as, you know what I mean? If I think I look fab and someone thinks I look like shit, that feels yucky, but if I intentionally look a way that I know will upset them, I'm still getting my desired outcome even if their reaction is negative, you know? So if I feel like I can't control the narrative I just try not to allow anyone to react to me at all—and since I can only feel confident in an interest of mine as I accumulate time + an absurd degree of knowledge, things that I'm new to feel generally unsafe for me to enjoy. Not to whip out the psychoanalysis but I'm physically unable to stop myself from hyper-analyzing all my own thoughts and behaviors 😂 And also when I'm hyperfixated on something, it's very lonely to have no one to share it with irl? Or even online? Like when I got into the arcana, it didn't matter if people I knew irl played or not, because the fandom was thriving and the people were all so easy to connect to and I made a lot of friends easily, it was a welcoming space filled with people I had a lot in common with (it's kind of...... different now. But that's a WHOLE other thesis paper 😂), but I like... cannot engage w kpop fan spaces. I don't see a lot of people I could connect with, so it's lonely to have all these fun feelings and excitement that I can't share with pretty much anyone. There are a few exceptions, like your lovely self, obviously 😉 but it's kind of like. A very niche thing to be obsessed w, for my little patch of earth. Kinda similarly to how whenever someone I know irl would find out I absolutely am obsessed with the art of drag, and immediately make assumptions about what they says about me as a person, and about whether I'm "allowed" to like it. The few irl friends I have aren't judgemental, they just like, really don't get kpop and aren't interested 😂 which is fine. But it's depressing to not be able to vibe out w people when you're having fun, so I'm sort of wishing this phase would pass so I can stop obsessively infodumping to people about a topic they could not give two shits about 😂

I think about the weirdness of how infantalized these idols are a lot—like you're so right, the way a lot of people view kpop is fueled by such a weird and specific flavor of racism. Like, it's pop music, but on crack, it's all the hallmarks of eye catching fashion and incredibly catchy, fun music and super lovable starlets, but turned up to 11. But it gets this weird side-eye. I think esp for the area of the world that I'm in, where it's very much machismo and theres a heavy catholic influence in the way everyone thinks about life but esp in regards to things like gender, it's very "men should be men and that looks like THIS" and its just this hypermasculine, angry, dominating ideal, so being open to or enjoying the androgyny and boundary pushing fashions in kpop is seen as like "why do you like men that all look like girls, you're weird, that's gross." And I honestly used to feel that way too, but OOP surprise it was actually just me being uncomfy confronting the fact that I wish I could look like them and be pretty in a very androgynous way and be the thin, angular, editorial fashion ideal that literally ANY garment will look gorgeous on and achieve their aesthetic but I literally never will, mixed with eurocentric beauty standard brain rot and internalized misogyny 😂 we still dealing with it all but a bitch is slowly learning lmfao. I still very much cannot fw any of the girl groups though—that shit will IMMEDIATELY trigger an intense wave of self hatred that I frankly do not have the energy to deal with at this point in my life, and I don't need more visuals that reawaken my ED 😔

The one thing I do wish I'd noticed sooner is the sphere of kpop fashion. Because growing up I wanted to be a fashion designer, as a teenager I would spend days doing nothing but obsessing over editorial layouts and seasonal runways and insane, avante garde pieces, and when the world of high fashion started to be controlled more by influencers looking to promote products, and less by artists trying to make a statement, I became sooo fucking disillusioned. I still think it's so fucking sad that we went from the opulence of years like Dior under Galliano's vision, the insane visual storytelling and artistry of fashion that was meant to SPEAK, to... every major fashion label cought in a chokehold by the likes of the Kardashians (derogatory). Controversial, but like. I miss when actual models used to walk the runway and command it, not socialites who bought their spot and can't even walk in heels. Like, when Paris Hilton did it, it was a cheeky wink at the brainless hyper-consumption of pop culture media, it was a clever little dig at the rise of digital age celebrity culture—it wasn't meant to be taken seriously, it wasn't meant to be the height of artistic expression like it is now. When actual artists commanded street style, not the Hadids 🤮 Socialites were socialites, and fashionistas were fashionistas, they may intertwine but were not interchangeable. If you can't tell, I hate Instagram fashion lmfao. Now what's in editorials is athleisure and Dr Miami ruined the world lmfao. Obvi popular fashion and media representation is a nuanced topic, but my core beef w modern western fashion is that it's elevated bike shorts to the likes of McQueen (may he rest in peace 😔). But the era of fashion I loved died with the rise of Instagram—except on kpop stages. Its just my opinion, but I see the opulence and intricacy that I miss in so much of what dominates that fashion sphere. There's less of the "I secretly got a BBL, which I will deny, and my parents have money, so anything I wear is Fashion™" and more of the risk taking, subversive, artistic expression that's fallen out of favor with the western fashion world. In my humble onion, anyways. No tea no shade no pink lemonade u kno 😌 But that's the nostalgia in me.

Idk I vibe really heavily w the sound and the energy of these kpop artists, there's a level of precision and dedication that western artists just don't have and don't aspire to emulate, either. It's a fascinating formula for success. I do not envy them because my impression is that it's grueling enough to arguably be inhumane, but the end result is pretty fuckin consistently flawless and I am LIVING 😂

#Opinions no one asked for 😂😂😂😂#Also I'm kind of living for rpdr down under so far #SO WHAT IF I DONT UNDERSTAND LITERALLY ANY OF THE CULTURAL REFERENCES 😂#The snatch game was honestly painful tho......... Like oo lawd #Anyways all unrelated #Hashtag no one asked sara #asksteppie #felix-bi-anon

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afterthelastreset · 4 years ago

Text

Rules Of One’s Soul Ch9 A Third Player

(Mak belongs to @wasted-church)

Normally when one was coddled like a child, they would cease to be treated such a way, but right now it felt nice being comforted by the much larger darkner. Even if it was like when he would have to hold Lancer and reassure him of anything. So for now, he wouldn't argue and just be content with the taller cat holding him in his lap like this. The peace and quiet of the sheap helped him to calm his usually overhyped mind, and the softness of the cat was really nice. The two were interrupted by the small pattering of feet and soon enough the small mammal, which he could now clearly see looked like some kind of bat thing from the looks of those weird wings. They held an apologetic look. "I can't find food, but I found these." They held up what looked like dark candy in their hands and offered them to the two. "I found better food." Seam sighed. "You couldn't find anything else other than that?" They shook their head. "And why not?"

"Jevil ate the rest this morning. Everthing except my candy stash. I'aspulled hin at hiding" Seam sighed before patting Rouxls on the back and asking. "I don't suppose you'd be willing to eat nothing but sweets would you?" Rouxls didn't answer but he did grumble and move slightly away from Mak making him chuckle. "I suppose not then." Mak shrugged before plopping themself onto the ground, dropping a few candies in the process, and stuffing their face with a few of them. Seam gave a dry chuckle before leaning back into the couch. Rouxls shifting to lean back into him a bit more which made Seam chuckle a bit. "W-Wouldst thou stoppeth that?" "Stop what? I'm doing nothing but relaxing...And taking care of you of course. Ahahaha." Rouxls narrowed his eyes. "That! S-Stop that I-infernal laughing! Tis nay funny!," he shouted voice cracking. Seam chuckled harder, making his body shake. Rouxls grumbled again and asking, "What doth thou findeth so funny?" "It's not often I find things amusing being a humble shopkeeper and all....But when someone overreacts like you do, I can't help but be amused." "Pardon me?! Overreacting tis nay something I do!" He finally pushed himself from against the taller cat and looked up to face this one eyed menace. He chuckled again at Rouxls already flustered and angry face. Making him flush more. "STOP THAT!!" His voice braking made Seam laugh harder and Rouxls gave a sputter of anger. The duke then tried to push himself from the larger darkner's grip only to have a paw gently wrap around his chest and pull him back to the warmth of the soft cotton. Making him give off a very undignified squeal. He could practically feel his face flush a deep purple as the cat continued to laugh at the now struggling, sputtering duke. His legs kicked out barely missing Mak's head by a couple inches, causing the poor stuffed bat to yelp and duck for cover. More candy scattering to the floor from their hold. Rouxls gave off another squeal when Seam finally managed to set him back securely within his iron-like grip. "Thou art to r-release me this instant! I-I shan't be treated l-like a prisoner b-by a commoner!!" "Funny, funny.~ I always assumed you were more, more of a bigger spoon.~" The sudden voice made Rouxls snap up immediately and give out a tiny squeak at the sudden appearance of the floating menace just a little ways from them. He immediately felt his pupils shrink and out of instinct, he leaned away from the smiling imp against Seam's chest. Jevil titled his head curiously, taking in the strange sight before him. Seam slowly cleared his throat gaining Jevil's attention. "Jevil. There's something I need to talk to you about-" "I don't suppose, suppose it has something to do with all this?" He gestured towards Seam who was still holding Rouxls but now in a somewhat more slightly protective way. The worm continued to stare directly at Jevil with a not fear but more of a panic in his eyes. This didn't go unnoticed by the imp when he looked back towards him. Fanged smile slightly fading. "...Did I miss, miss something?" "I would say so. But...I think it'd be better if Rouxls had a chance to get up and stretch his legs for a bit." Before anyone could respond Seam slowly began to sit up from the couch, moving his paws to hook under Rouxls's body. The worm gave a surprised noise when Seam moved him into the bridal position before standing up himself. Jevil tilted his head more and rose a brow as to question as to why Seam was holding HIS desired, but Seam gave him a look to say 'Not right now. Later.' Thankfully, Jevil backed off but didn't stray too far from the strange duo, as Seam turned towards the front of his sheap. He had to carefully step over Mak as they scrambled to pick up and eat the candies they spilt earlier from Rouxls's flailing like a fish caught in a net. Rouxl's making a comment about how unhealthy it was for a child to eat anything off the floor. Jevil followed close behind with the same questioning expression. "I can walk on mine own," Rouxls huffed while in Seam's arms, but it seemed the cat ignored his whining. Ounce they were in the front and away from the child, Seam set Rouxls down on his feet. The worn wobbled a bit, getting use back in his legs after sitting on practically a living cushion for the past hour or so, before regaining balance and standing up straight. Seam watched him for a moment before turning to Jevil who was of course staring at Rouxls with a sultry gaze. "Now what has happened to cause the duke, duke to stumble within your humble, humble home and become situated within your ....arms, arms?," he questioned Seam without really looking at him. Seam only answered with a hum before shifting his one eye back towards Rouxls who was busy straightening himself up, before looking over his shoulder at the two. "I...think I can explain. If the duke here doesn't mind me retelling what had happened-" "I simply p-passed out from static shock," Rouxls insisted crossing his arms over his chest like a pouting child, "A-And then I woketh up on thine filthy sofa where that....that thing-" "Mak." "Mak nearly frightened me to death! I shan't hear a-anymore of the matter!" He looked away with a cough, expecting neither to question his authority. ...He should've know by now. "I'm afraid that's not what happened. And you absolutely know it." Seam's answer silenced Rouxls into a blank stare. His button eye spun a few times before he looked back at the eager awaiting jester and sighed. Reaching up a paw to rub through the tuft of fur around his neck. "Don't know how to begin honestly...You might not like the news I bare." "Oh?" Jevil's smile became more strained as he narrowed his eyes slightly. The sight made Rouxls gulp and fail to suppress a shudder. "Hehe. I can't wait to hear the answer, the answer.~ Now what has happened, happened that would hender my mood..mood?" The old cat sighed before reaching up to rub his face. "Well...To be blunt?..... I believe your friend here-" He nodded towards the still duke. "-has a connection towards someone else. He didn't react too kindly to it I'm afraid ." Silence. Jevil blinked and his smile faded completely instantly. He stared at the cat for what seemed like forever before smiling again and giggling a little. Oh, what a joke. Seam's joking habits were still present after all these years. He looked back towards Seam with an expectancy to see him laugh at any moment when he saw through the joke....But he didn't. Instead Seam sighed again and reached a paw up to rub at his temple. What-? He quickly looked towards Rouxls, expecting a similar reaction, but the worm merely blinked that nervous look back at them. His form tense as they awaited the imp"s answer. They didnt wait too long because when Rouxls didnt answer Jevil swiveled his head back to Seam and laughed. "BWAHAHA!! Funny, funny. A good joke, joke to pull so close and so soon to such a wonderful holiday, holiday. You were always such a silly kidder Seam, Seam." Seam stared back and just sighed again. "No, Jevil. Im not kidding. This isn't a joke." Jevil's smile dropped again. His yellow eyes darted over to the still frozen worm who flinched as the yellow pinpricks studied his form. After a short while of just silent studying he again smiled but this time it seemed a little more strained. But only slightly. He chuckled. "Hehe. So a rival player has entered our game of hearts it seems." His tone made Rouxls shiver it held a almost happy aura but underneath was a slight displeasure. Jevil rubbed his clawed hands together and smiled sweetly at Seam. " And just who might this new player that has placed his heart card into, into our game?~ And so, so late too. I've nearly, nearly set down my deck, deck." Neither answered for a moment but Jevil wasn't stupid. He caught the nervous glance the two gave each other before back at him. Rouxls could practically feel the slimey sweat dripping down his face right now. Seam looked much calmer given the current situation but he did use to spend everyday with this lunatic. Surely he would figure out some way to turn this around and lesson the tense air between the three. The cat slowly rose a paw. "Me." Rouxls felt any sanity he had left shatter. Jevil gave a slightly surprised look and rose a brow at the cat's blunt answer. After a few more seconds he broke the silence. "You, you?" "Yep." He finally gave a calm smile. " Haha. To be honest I can't believe it much either. Could've sworn I wouldn't find mine let alone share one. " "Hahaha! Such a chaotic, chaotic dual fate has played against this!" the crazy idiot let off a series of giggles. The duke felt his mouth drop at the whole thing.......Did these two seriously not see how disastrous this was and how they obviously needed to find a solution to this?! Instead these two were talking like they were gambling with cards and he was like some grand prize to be handed over to the winner just like that! NO! He had quite enough of these shenanigans and all this ridiculous talks about how HE should feel and how these two were involved in his life. Quickly his nervous feeling was replaced by a anger and before his brain caught up to hid he shouted- "NO!!" Well the shout certainly caught the other two off guard. It certainly spooked him a bit. All three stood there facing each other and the child bat even stuck their head into the doorway at the sudden shout. Cheeks puffed out with what must' ve been the spilt candies. "....No what, what?" Well there was no going back now was there? Rouxls gave the most professional face he could muster and cleared his throat. "N-No! I will n-not be playing any of thou's 'games' any longer. T-They are not but foolish distractions that hast cost mineself valuable time with mine son and ....and am n-nay intetested in these l-love games!...M-Mine emotions are not a gambling table upon which you can play!" He straightened up his form and huffed. "Calleth me a coward to whom seest it fitting, but I amst forfeiting this playground of fantasies!" "Fantasy, fantasy?!....After what you said to me, me earlier?!" Jevil's face quickly became slightly annoyed. "You cannot, cannot just exit a game once you enter the gamble of life-" "Do you-" A paw quickly came between the two. And Seam turned to the steamed Duke. "-know how soul connections work?" Rouxls scoffed and waved a hand. "Of course. Tis the person whomever thou falleths in love with. Tis soulmate nonsense is beyond tiresome. " The two fell silent again as Seam lowered his paw and Jevil's annoyance left. Replaced with a blank expression. The two shared a silent look and as if reading each other's minds, came to the same understanding that reflected in their faces. Rouxls rose a questioning brow as too say, 'What's going on now?'. "That clears, clears the missing pieces of our puzzle, puzzle. Hehe." "What nonsense art thou mumbling now?" Jevil casually reached around and floated until he slung the arm around a slightly startled Rouxls. And giggled at his expression. "Silly, silly really.~ One cannot play a game they don't understand the rules, rules too. " Rouxls leaned his head away from the gave before reaching up a hand to push the giggling face away before giving Seam a questioning look. The old cat sighed before reaching up to rub his own face. "There's more to souls than just two people falling in love," he mumbled through his paw. "Likest what?" Instead of answering he gestured towards the back room again before turning around and shuffling towards the old room. The duke grumbled something but Jevil's giggles and nudges forward made him cave to the silent command to follow. Mak ducked their head back in as soon as Seam stepped into the doorway shortly followed by the duke and floating jester. And not too later the three were sat upon The couch....Well Rouxls and Jevil shared the couch. Seam was currently nicely seated in a random armchair he summoned up out of nowhere. When the three were somewhat comfortable the cat sighed. "Well then...How shall we start this?" "How about thee part where thou tellest me when this will be resolved?" "When you stop playing, playing the cruel act in the play?~" "Jevil. Please." He giggled and shrugged making him sigh and roll his eye. "Look. It's not an easy thing to explain. ...Even for someone who's seen it quite a couple times in my time. Hehe...But I can try to explain it at all." Rouxls hand a 'go on' motion with his hand and he continued. " Well...Your soul- how do I put this?- calls out to others almost constantly. Like a homing beacon. It just means you eventually find the person you're meant to be with. Mostly with a spark or reaction from each one's soul. And that's what usually people call soulmates." Rouxls blinked before slowly glancing over at Jevil who smiled widely at the worm monster. A....reaction of souls? He felt his ears dropped at the memory of his soul throbbing against his rib cage under Jevil's touch. The feeling of belonging strongly pulsing throughout his entire frame. And then the giant rush of adrenaline from shaking hands with Seam- "W-What a moment. How doth thou explain what hast happened earlier today? I refuse to believe tis was nothing more than static shock." Seam hummed. "Well....There has been rare cases of one having more than one attraction. Hehe. I guess you should count yourself lucky on that part." Rouxls just stared at the smiling cat before looking at Jevil who smiled wider with a purr of all things. "See, see?~ One cannot cheat the game of order, order and chaos- " Rouxls quickly stood up and away from the outstretched hand Jevil held out and gave a desperate look. "N-Now you stopeth that! I-I hath non intetest i-in being the target of thou's games! Doeth eithet of you think about mine say in thine matter?!" "Of course. It's a hard thing to understand at first, Im still trying to wrap these old patches around the idea. Hehe." "That tis nay what I meaneth and t-thou knows it!" Rouxls gave a side glance towards Jevil who giggled and held out his hand towards him. His hand held a pink glow and instantly his pupils shrank. Pink hearts shooting towards him. The day he held his emotions out to her- Rouxls squealed making everyone jump when the Duke held his arms out in a way one would do to shield themselves. The look in his eyes wild. "Nononononono!! No heart! No hearts!" The room went silent for a moment as the frozen jester floated there stunned and still gave that face when a bigger paw gently grabbed his outstretched hand to slowly lower it back down to his side. Seam pulled him back a few inches and gave a sigh before mumbling- "That's the thing I was hoping to talk to you about. But it seems I was a bit too late." A small stumble of footsteps caught their attention and Rouxls slowly backed away towards the doorway. Jevil perked up and reached out for him but yelped when the cat, with surprisingly good speed, latched onto the imp and pulled him back. Rouxls jumped startled and stumbled more. He fell over in the process and fell to the floor with a thud. Quickly picking himself up and scooting back. "I-.....I have my shop t-to t-t-tend to and. ...and. ...And other things!" "W-Wait, wait! I thought you said you didn't fear, fear me!" Nothing. "Rouxls?" The duke said nothing to the pleading yellow eyes and just scrambled out of that room away from the situation fully. "WAIT! COME BACK, BACK!" He pulled against the force holding him- "Jevil, stop! Let him go right now!" Seam's usually calm voice peirced his movements like a knife. "He needs some time to take this all in without you pushing your..uh..affection on him." The imp stopped but gave him a look that reminded him of a kicked puppy. Silence once again was the only speaker for them. Silently he unwrapped his paws from around his body and let him go limp in midair. After a moment the cat sighed and lowered his body back down into the armchair. He was really hoping to talk with Jevil about this before anything like this would happen. But too late I guess. Jevil was always one to just jump and express emotions whenever he felt like it, actually he was pretty predicable once you learnt his personality. But others often mistook his boldness and kept away from him. It would explain the Duke's weird reaction to him now. While Seam could see obvious signs of returning affection from Rouxls, his hesitance was strange. But now at least some peices were falling into place. Jevil stared at his old friend and asked in a voice not suited for him- "Is he....scared, scared of me? Did I do something, something wrong?" One look at the jesters fallen face made him sigh." No. No you didn't. But I was hoping to warn you of our dear friend"s fear of showing emotion." ".....He's afraid of my desire, desire?" "Not exactly..." He scratched his cheek in thought. How should he approuch this? "More so like he"s....erm...Confused and overwhelmed at the amount of attention hes getting right now most likely. You did say he suffered from insomnia?" "Nosleepitis. Yes, yes! And very stick in the mud, mud syndrome." "Well...hehe. I think maybe you should give him a little more space to get used to you." He chuckled. " You might spook him away with your desire flung at him every few seconds." Jevils ears twitched and the imp hummed before leaning forward a little. " Is that a hint of challenge I hear, hear. Old friend?~" Seam chuckled and narrowed his eye slightly. "You know I long since retired from those games. But....Perhaps I have some last few tricks up my sleaves....And its not very often I find someone who nakes me laugh with glee." The smile was back. "BWAHAHA! Are you sure, sure you're ready for me to deal you in, into this game of ours?~ Once you enter, you have to play or risk, risk forfeiting? ~" "Haha. I think this would bring some fun back into my life. Or not. Who knows unless you try? Hehe. And the prize might be worth the wait. " "HAHAHAHA! SEAM, SEAM!! JUST LIKE OLD, OLD TIMES!!" He latched onto his sides and curled into a ball giggling mad. "CHAOS, CHAOS!! FUN, FUN!! A GAME OF SUSPENSE, LOVE, FRIENDS- BETTER THAN A SIMPLE NUMBERS GAME!!" Seam smiled at the proposition. "Well then. May I have permission to be dealt into this game of yours old friend?" He held out his paw. Jevil rubbef his chin clear excitement in his eyes. "Are you certain?~ I have ways, ways of getting my desired checkmate in this event, event?" Seam gave an equally excited look. " Don't be fooled. I just might have a full house to throw down." With a smile. The two crazy fools shook hands. " Hehehe. I look forward to our dance, dance."

#seam x jevil #jevil x seam #jevil x rouxls #Rouxvil #Rouxlvil #Nosuit #Seaxls #rouxls kaard x seam #seam x rouxls #jeam #seavil #rouxls kaard #rouxls x jevil #Jevil #Seam #Deltarune

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artstyle-chameleon · 4 years ago

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[BIC] ❎Please DO NOT repost, trace, EDIT or copy my art, without my explicit permission and proper credit, thank you❎

Copied and pasted from my amino wiki http://aminoapps.com/p/m35hnfi

All art is mine. I know my art styles kinda weird but please don't mind it XD

[IMG=FJU]

[BIC]😈Name: Noburu Kirakuto

[BIC]😈Gender: Female

[BIC]😈Quirk: Elasticity (can stretch)

[BIC]😈Age: 15

[BIC]😈Height: 174cm or 5ft 8.(stretches herself out to be more than six foot tall often)

[BIC]😈Nicknames: Slim, Stretch, Boru, delinquent, or beanpole.

[BC]💜Noburu's song (it fits her best) [Here!🎺|https://youtu.be/J9DEcaV0s3Y]

[BIC] 💜Appearance💜

[IC]Noburu Is a very tall and skinny girl with medium length Dirty blonde Hair, (she dyes it a LOT so it changes A LOT) Stormy blue eyes, and dark circles under her eyes. (She does a lot of pacing at 3am)

[IC]she has very skinny limbs, large hands, and stretch marks cover almost the majority of her body except for her face. She also tends wear baggier clothing, but everything looks baggy when it hangs off her slim figure. She also tends to wear a fannypack or a ball cap a lot of the time, even with her uniform.

(Also she's super skinny when stretching herself to be taller, but shes actually is a little chubby when shes at her normal height. Prolly her loose skin. Its not a dramatic chubby, shes still quite skinny, but has a bit of baby fat at her normal height.)

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[BIC]"gee whiz that sucks" ~Noburu

[IMG=3JU]

[BIC]🔮About Noburu🔮

[BIC]Noburu is a very mischievous kid, and loves to pull harmless pranks and acts of vandalism, but despite her cocky and obnoxious outside, she is a bit of an social outcast. Only keeping to a very meager group of friends, and tends to avoid new people.

[BIC]She also has a lot of strange tendencies, and likes to stretch herself really tall to make her feel more confident and come off as more intimidating. Even thought it wears her out to use her quirk most of the time, she does it to help cope with her anxieties. In her mind being intimidating and tall, helps her feel less helpless and aids her in avoiding potential confrontations with other people.

[BIC]Whenever she's with friends she tends to shrink back down to her average height which is more around 174cm (5ft 8). Still pretty tall compared to a lot of the other girls in MUA, but she's less nervous around girls as she is around boys. The more nervous she is the taller she will make herself basically.

[BIC]She hardly ever takes breaks from using her quirk, especially in a crowded setting like MUA where her anxiety is at its peak, but sometimes she will shrink back down without noticing especially when she's worn herself out. In fact a lot of the time during classes she will have trouble staying awake and especially staying focused.

[BIC]On the upside, because she uses her quirk so often she's one of the more practiced students in MUA, and knows how to use her quirk well. So whenever the need arises, using her quirk comes to her naturally, and she has more immediate reactions to danger than many of her other classmates.

[BIC]This is something that also comes back to her anxious nature, she's always mentally prepared for something to go wrong. So when it does, she tends to skip being shocked, and go directly into action. Its that impulse and incentive to react quickly that shows real promise for her to become as a hero.

[BIC]Her main problem with her quirk is the fatigue it causes. When she uses it constantly she finds herself too exhausted to do much of anything, and if anything bad were to happen, though her reaction time would be good, she will likey collapse of exhaustion within a short amount of time.

[BIC]In fact most of her problems lie with the fact that shes using her quirk as a coping mechanism for other underlying issues. Even though there is the benefit of her being mentally ready for danger, she won't be as physically prepared to deal with the danger.

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[BIC]"Splish Splash your Opinion is trash" ~Noburu

[BIC]😎Headcannons😎 (theres a lot so hang in)

[IC]💜Whenever Noburu cracks her knuckles, or a bone pops it makes a squeaking noise.💜

[IC]💜Swings like spiderman, or walks from light pole to light pole to get places. Likes to use her quirk for transportation. Occassionally uses her quirk and a skateboard to propel and slingshot herself to different places.💜

[IC]💜She's basically a rubberhose human. She can stretch, bend, anything a cartoon character can do with some limitations. She does pull muscles easily tho, when that happens she looses the ability to retract her arms. She ends up wearing her messed up arm like a scarf when she does.💜

[IC]💜Can spiderwalk like in the exorcist. Very important to mention.💜

[IC]💜Says sound effects aloud a lot, doesn't know why. Some of the common ones she uses are yoink, yeet, whap, boing, bing, and swoosh. 💜

[IC]💜Mastered the art of falling down the stairs like a slinky. Does it to show off, doesn't realize it makes her look like a moron.💜

[IC]💜Makes Insulting friendship bracelets for people she actually likes💜

[IC]💜Has a Pet Ferret Named Ricky (he's just as much a moron as his mommy)💜

[IC]💜Noburu leaves notes for her crush, their normally in a code and they're always corny pickup lines💜

[IC]💜feeds into todorokis theories with her own, they could talk for hours about other peoples possible parentage💜

[IC]💜When Aizowa erases Noburu's quirk while she's using it to stretch her arms or legs, they'll retract automatically, and it ends with her slapping herself in the face like a human rubber band💜

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[IMG=8IC]

[BIC]😎Ricky Headcannons😎 (her pet ferret)

[IC]🎺Rickys theme [Song|https://youtu.be/a0r0jznFjA8]🎺

[IC]💗She brings him to school often, and most of the time he doesn't run off, but when he does hes a loose danger sock. He will bite ankles and dance away from his pursuers💗

[IC]💗Will sneak into any open spaces, like pant legs, open bookbags, or a certain teachers sleeping bag. (First time it happens Aizowa get freaked out because Ricky bites him)💗

[IC]💗Squeaks when caught, and runs away. Very slippery boy💗

[IC]💗loves hiding under furniture, and playing with loose trash💗

[IC]💗Sleeps in Noburu's hoodie, or in her fanny pack💗

[IC]

______________________________________________________

[BIC]

Last updated: 09/22/20

Hopefully will add more about this girl later. Hope you like her so far tho.

#noburu Kirakuto #mha fandom #mha ocs #Noburu #Slapstick Psycho

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pietromelim · 5 years ago

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A Thomas Lightwood Bisexual Story (Part 1)

Art by NairaFeather

Takes place AFTER Chain of Gold,so will have spoilers.

Thomas Lightwood was currently at the Devil Tavern,drinking a ginger beer,and trying to understand his own feelings.

He didn't want to admit that he was struggling to understand what was happening to him. After telling Alastair Carstairs to never talk to him again,he expected to feel lighter,the rumors Alastair spreaded about his father were awful,and it caused pain to his family. It made Gideon angry,it made Sophie cry. And yet,there he was,wondering if he was too hard on Alastair.

Couldn't he simply forget all about it? Maybe that was why he asked for the beer in the first place,but then again,getting drunk would only make him forget for a period of time. He would remember eventually.

Still,it wasn't like he had a better idea anyway. The Devil was quite full this night,werewolves screaming and having fun,vampires drinking blood with some kind of weird extra ingredient,not to mention the faeries and their silly giggles.

It was hard to focus on the drinking with all that noise,Polly herself was quite curious when she saw Thomas enter all by himself. He couldn't blame her,The Merry Thieves were always together,it was hard for one of them to show up alone there.

But Thomas desperately needed to be alone. He loved his friends,but James, Matthew and Christopher wouldn't understand what he was going through now,and that was not a surprise for Thomas.

-Give me another one Polly,please.-Thomas asked,Polly stared at him with a concerned expression.

-You sure about this? Aren't your parents worried about you or something?-She asked.

-They always are,but i don't have time for their blabbering,at least not today.-Said Thomas.

-Got it.-Polly said,giving Thomas another ginger beer.

Thomas gave her a weak smile,and drank from his beer. In times like these,he wished he had the same ease Matthew had in getting drunk. Too bad,it would still take a little more for him to get there.

-Mind if i take a seat beside you?-Asked a female voice,unknown to Thomas,but she had a strong accent.

-Not at all.-Thomas said,turning his head to see who was the woman.

She had black hair,almost the same color of James',her eyes were light brown,and her skin light.

But what really caught Thomas' attention was the Voyance Rune on her hand. She was a Shadowhunter.

Thomas knew he couldn't hide his shock for a moment. A Shadowhunter girl in the Devil Tavern? Surely she was either mad or didn't knew of the reputation of the place.

-A fellow Shadowhunter in a place like this? Surely this was the last thing i thought i'd find here.-She said.

Thomas carefully chose his next words. It was kind of weird,he grew up with three women in his house,his mother and his two sisters. It was easy for him to talk with Lucie,Cordelia,even other girls that usually showed up in the balls. So why did it felt weird talking to this one?

-Pardon me,have we met before?-Asked Thomas.

-We did not. Or maybe we did. I can barely remember faces that i see in balls or other occasions.-She said.

Thomas didn't knew what to say. Surely he wasn't expecting anyone besides Polly to talk to him. He never really understood why some people would simply approach him for a conversation.

If Matthew were there,he could chat with the girl himself,or maybe if James were there,he would come up with a excuse to make them leave.

But they were not there,and Thomas had to be a gentleman,or Sophie would consider herself a terrible mother.

-I do believe we have not met before. My name is Thomas Lightwood.-He said,waiting for her answer.

-I am Giovanna Monteverde,pleased to meet you,Thomas. I am relieved to see i will have some company tonight.-She said.

-Monteverde? I think this is the first time i have met one of your family. Which is a little strange,considering that i have lived in Idris for a good part of my life.-Said Thomas.

-It is the first time i meet a Lightwood myself! Though your family is a lot more popular than mine. I do believe it is because of a certain Benedict Lightwood?-She said,smirking.

Thomas nearly blushed.

-Oh yes,there is quite a story there. Not really something us,Lightwoods,appreciate anyway.-Said Thomas.

-I see. Anyways,i have always been at the Rome Institute. Have you ever visited there?-She asked.

-I have not. But what is an Italian Shadowhunter doing in London?-Asked Thomas.

-I turned eighteen a few weeks ago,and i have decided to visit the London Institute. After all,it was here where the Mandikhor attacks happened,was it not?-She asked.

Thomas blinked,he didn't even liked to remember the Mandikhor. Their deadly poison took Barbara from him,and that wound would never heal.

-I see. So you took interest in London due to that? I assure you it was quite an awful time for us all. Luckily,we have an antidote,so if more Mandikhors show up,they won't be able to harm us that way never again.-Said Thomas.

-Oh i took interest in London for many different reasons. I heard balls in this time of the year are absolutely gorgeous. I'm excited to see all by myself.-She said.

But Thomas could barely understand her. The noise was way too loud. To be expected,after all,they were in the Devil Tavern.

-Would you like to talk in a more silent place?-Asked Thomas.

She nodded,and followed him upstairs.

When they got in the room,the thought of being alone with a girl crossed Thomas' mind,causing a strange sensation.

It was a little hard for Thomas to understand himself sometimes. He knew that people were different from each other. Even in aspects,that technically,they should be all the same.

One example was his very cousin,Anna Lightwood. He knew that dressing like a man wasn't the only thing Anna did. He knew she could seduce any girl she wanted,even though she was a girl herself.

But Thomas didn't quite felt like that. He felt attraction to girls,he knew that. But it wasn't only to them. His time in the Shadowhunter Academy made him realize that.

He felt attraction to boys too. But it seemed way too messy to think about that. He wasn't sure of the reactions something like that would cause.

His family did seem to accept that. His Uncle Gabriel and his Aunt Cecily loved Anna,and they got really mad when people used bad words to describe their daughter. All the others seemed to care for Anna the same way. His parents,his cousins too.

Still,Thomas simply didn't felt ready to reveal anything. Perhaps he was still figuring out who he trully was.

-Quite scandalous,isn't it? What would our society think if they saw a lady and a gentleman that do not have an understanding getting in a room together?-She said,laughing.

-Is that a problem for you? Also,we are only having a conversation. How could something like that be scandalous?-Thomas asked.

-Oh,i don't have a problem i assure you. But my parents would definitely have,if they knew i came to a place like this,they would be quite furious with me.-Giovanna said.

-They are not with you? Well,that's not surprising. I went to Madrid all by myself as well.-Said Thomas.

-You did? Well,seems like we have quite a bit of things in common. We are both 18 years old. Both went to different countries to visit different Institutes. And both don't really care about this whole "understanding" thing.-She said.

After Thomas locked the door,Giovanna suddenly kissed him.

It took him a few seconds to understand what was happening there. She was a stranger,still,they were kissing. Maybe he was not crystal clear in his intentions? He really brought her there just to talk.

They broke the kiss,both in need of air. Her lips tasted like alcohol and something sweet,almost like strawberry.

-Don't take me wrong,i don't really do this with every gentleman i see.-She said.

-I think you may have misunderstood me. I wasn't planning on...-Thomas was saying,but he didn't even knew how to finish that sentence.

-I was though. Unless you have an understanding with some lady in London? If you do,i am more than ready to leave.-Giovanna said.

Thomas just stood there for a moment,thinking about the answer he could give her. He could lie,lie and make her leave him alone there. Seemed like the more reasonable thing to do. He was a gentleman,and he didn't want to ruin her reputation,like a man once did with Eugenia.

Still,was that what he really wanted? If she was visiting London,then certainly they would meet again,probably at the Institute at any moment. But he could have this little secret of his.

-Should i leave,Thomas?-She asked again.

Thomas shook his head.

-No.-He said,and kissed her again.

They fought for dominance,deepening the kiss as they moved towards the small bed in the room. It wasn't a big room really,but then,Thomas never thought he would ever do something like this.

Giovanna unbottoned his shirt,revealing Thomas' tanned muscled body,she ran her hands over his chest and his hard abs,it was quite the sensation.

-Raziel bless the Shadowhunter training.-She said,Thomas almost laughed. It was surely something a lady should never say. But he didn't care,and Giovanna didn't seemed to care either.

-Is this okay for you? I truly do not wish to do something you are not okay with.-Thomas said.

-Do not worry,Thomas. Nobody in London knows me,and i don't really care about what people think of me. And it isn't like you are ruining me or anything. I want this too.-She said.

-Very well then.-Thomas said,taking his shirt off and laying with her on the bed.

"The Next Morning"

Thomas woke up with the sunlight on his eyes. He still was at the Devil's,and the memories of the last night invaded his mind.

Giovanna. They had slept together. It was definitely one of the most amazing nights he ever had. Surely one he would never forget.

He wasn't wearing any clothes,and only the bed sheets covered him.

-Damn.-Thomas said,after realizing that all his clothes were scattered on the floor. It was quite a wild night.

He heard footsteps,though he wasn't really sure if he had completely woke up yet. Perhaps he was still sleeping?

-How strange. I don't really remember locking the door after we left.-Said a voice he knew well.

Matthew. What bloody hell was he doing there so early?

-I'm pretty sure we left the key with Thomas.-Said James.

-We didn't find him anywhere though.-Said Christopher.

"Oh bloody damn hell!" Thomas thought,they were all here? And he wasn't even dressed!

-Thankfully,i always bring my spare key with me.-Said Christopher.

There was no time to do anything. They entered the room and saw Thomas in that situation.

All of them looked absolutely in shock. Matthew looked like he was about to laugh. Christopher was blinking quite fast,and James gasped.

-Tom? What on earth? Why is the room this messy? Are these your clothes on the floor?-James asked.

Thomas looked at the window. Alastair crossed his mind. He was probably awake and living his life as if nothing happened. He probably didn't even care if Thomas wouldn't like to talk to him ever again.

Yet,he was still there,on his mind.

Perhaps there was more than just attraction and sex in the world. Perhaps love was an actual possibility.

But Thomas wasn't sure if he would ever figure that out.

#tsc #the merry thieves #the last hours #thomas lightwood #alastair carstairs #james herondale #christopher lightwood #matthew fairchild #cassandra clare #chain of gold #original character

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nagichi-boop · 5 years ago

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hi!!! can i get a matchup pls??? • im 170cm, very pale, i have a few freckles on my face and i have this mole below my left eye (other ppl look good w it why does mine look like dirt??? 😖), i lean more on the thick side but unfortunately not that thick 😔🤘, my hair is always up on a ponytail!! bc its rlly hot in my country, i only let my hair down at home. oh!! and my hair is shoulder length 🍰

im really quiet at first but when you get close to me i can get rlly loud. not all the time tho, talking too much exhausts me :d i appear as a very boyish person to others so i hide the fact that i like stuff like sanrio, pokemon, star butterfly vs. the forces of evil- ok i gotta stop. i like sending my friends weird memes at 3am. the reaction they give in the morning feeds my soul 👌 🍰

im a multimedia arts student!! i love editing photos and videos so thats what i do a lot on my free time. i write and draw too! but im not confident in it yet. im considered tall in my country so a lot of professors recommend me to be a student athlete, but i h a t e sweating.. i like watching people play tho! (but i almost never cheer even if its my brother or a friend im shy ok iM SORRY) this was hella long :000 i apologize bsbsjsb and thank you in advance!!! ❤ 🍰

Hey! Thank you for your request! I'm sorry it took so long for me to get to. Hope you like it anyways!

I'd ship you with...

Kuroo Tetsurou!

• I'm gonna assume you are in the class same as Kuroo for this, hope that's okay.

• He was walking with Yaku having another debate about their preferences for girls when he suddenly pointed at you and said "like her!", which caused you to freeze. Kuroo also froze as he realised what he did. He then ran up to you to apologise and explained that he was arguing about preferences and he was saying that you looked attractive. He then awkwardly blushed and jogged off, apologising as he went back to Yaku and the team.

• Honestly you were really shocked about the situation. Like...what just happened? This boy suddenly just came up to you, said you were attractive then left.

• You then saw him and Kenma the next day and he stopped and stared at you for a moment, before going over to you looking slightly flustered. He then said in a slightly nervous voice, "Uhm, I'm sorry about what happened yesterday, but the truth is I have kind of noticed you for a while. You look really pretty and I kind of wanted to talk to you. I noticed as well that you tend to doodle in class and when I glanced over, I thought you drawings were super cute...a-anyways, we don't have volleyball practice after school today, so did you want to go to a café with me later? My treat."

• Kenma quietly judged Kuroo because of how creepy he was being but also because he knew exactly what he was doing.

• You agreed without thinking since the whole situation caught you off guard, and he happily thanked you and walked off, saying he'd come find you after school. Then after he left, you realised what you'd done.

• You waited for him outside the school and he finally caught up with you, but Kenma was also with him. He then took the two of you to a cat café because of course he did and Kenma, who read the mood and realised he was third wheeling, left the two of you alone to talk while he went to play with the cats.

• It was a bit uncomfortable at first, but after Kuroo settled down a little, he became super easy to talk to and was really good at keeping the conversation going, which helped you to relax as well. Before you knew it, the two of you started sharing memes and cackling at them together. You could feel Kenma's judgement from across the room.

• Kuroo asked if he could have your number and you agreed. You sent him a 3am meme hoping he wouldn't get mad, and the next morning he sent you a bunch of messages about how he was wheezing and he couldn't breathe because of how funny the memes were, so you decided to add him to your target list of sending memes. Eventually, Kuroo started to participate as well, sending you memes as well as people on his team. Some found it funny, but others Yaku and Kenma got mad at Kuroo, which only motivated him to do it more. He also started to occasionally send some to your friends as well.

• You were afraid to be more open with Kuroo because you didn't want him to think badly of you because of the less "boyish" things you liked. One day, though, he caught you looking at pictures of Sanrio plushies on your phone, which made you panic. But he just smiled and said, "I like those too," which was really shocking. You assumed he was just trying to be nice, but then he pulled out his keys, which had a Kuromi keychain attached.

• (Apparently, he and Kenma found out about the Sanrio characters when they went to an arcade as kids and they bought each other keychains. Kenma bought Kuromi for Kuroo and Kuroo bought Gudetama for Kenma. Kenma's keychain was attached to the case for his Animal Crossing Switch. He told you to keep this a secret since he knew Kenma would get embarrassed, but it eventually came up in conversation at one point and Kenma showed his keychain.)

• As you and Kuroo got closer, so did you and Kenma. He was really good at noticing when something was off and he'd listen to your concerns. You also realised that you had a lot of common interests and you felt comfortable sharing your hobbies with him and Kuroo. When Kuroo saw the two of you talking comfortably about Pokémon one time, he had a really sincere smile on his face because he was amazed at how well the two of you got along and how you glew when you talked passionately about your hobbies. He fell in love with you a little more.

• You realised one day that you weren't exactly sure what your relationship with Kuroo was. You were friends of course and you'd spend a lot of time together, but you wanted more, you were just afraid to say since you didn't want to ruin what you had. Kenma noticed you seemed to be deep in thought and you told your feelings to him, to which convinced you to confess to Kuroo, saying it would make him happy.

• You nervously said to Kuroo that you'd like to date, and he just kind of froze and then said in a cracked voice "s-sure!" He then apologised for the strange response and then confessed that he'd had feelings for you for a long time, he just didn't know how to tell you. He then kissed your hand and thanked you for confessing, then he ran off to get ready for practice.

• Kuroo seemed to be a little bit more on edge with you now you were dating. When you confronted him about it, he said he wasn't sure how comfortable you were with displays of affection and the reason he was on edge was because he wasn't sure whether he was okay to hold your hand, hug you, kiss you, etc. You let him know what your terms were and he relaxed a little knowing what his boundaries were.

• You were glad Kuroo was taller than you because you loved being able to bury yourself in his chest or shoulder whenever he hugged you. And despite his tough-looking exterior, he really loves cuddling and he's super good at it and showing his affection in soft ways.

• Kuroo really loves watching you draw and edit. He either quietly watches you do it or he sits off to the side and let's you get on with it, maybe looking at you every now and then and smiling at how pretty you look. Either way, he is fine with quietly hanging around when you work and he does his best not to disturb you, but also likes to encourage you to take breaks and cuddles you when you do so you can recharge.

• The first time you let your hair down in front of Kuroo he just...stopped? You got confused because you didn't know why he reacted like that, but he had to turn his head away and cover his face because of how much he was blushing. Even if you don't think highly of yourself, to him you are the most stunning, attractive person ever, both in terms of how you look and your personality.

• Kuroo really appreciate you supporting him during matches, even if you don't go crazy cheering for him. Just knowing you're there is enough for him to feel grateful.

• The club members love you as well. Not only are you Kuroo's weakness which they sometimes like to exploit for entertainment, you also get along with everyone super well. They were so shocked when they saw Kenma talking to you so naturally. They started inviting you out whenever they'd go out as a team since you were practically a part of it now.

• Kuroo is super good at showing how much he loves you, even just through little things. You also make him super happy just by being you. Arguing with Yaku that day was the best thing to ever happen to him.

I was gonna pair you with Yaku but I felt like I was only doing that since I've already done Kuroo as a matchup before, but honestly I think Kuroo is a super good match. Hope you enjoyed this!

Sorry this is so long btw, I am in Kenma and Kuroo loving hours, so this was fun to write! To be honest, I could have written more if I wanted to, but I didn't wanna drag this out too much.

#haikyuu!!#haikyuu matchups #haikyuu x reader #kuroo testuro #kuroo x reader #nagichi matchups

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