#this is just a simple one for now :3
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naptime... (WIP most likely)
#still working out a design for over/lord's tum#this is just a simple one for now :3#voreforemers#safe vore#sfw vore#transvoremers#over/pan#over/lord#tre/pan
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"I can't ignore what's under dancefloor boards, The rhythm of my heart a dead-as-disco beat, But I still move my feet, to slip out of this groove, I'm free" ~ 2econd 2ight 2eer, Will Wood, The Normal Album
I have been plagued with visions of LDR Sun every time I listen to this song and I NEEDED to get this out of my system @spadillelicious when do we get to smooch the boy pLEASE
v textless version and close ups under cut!! v
#fnaf#fnaf security breach#fnaf dca#dca au#dca fanart#dca fandom#Love Death and Rollerskates#LDR sun#will wood#2econd 2ight 2eer#the normal album#tw eyestrain#cw guns#if you see any mistakes in the text no you didn't#took me way too long to get everything lined up and readable PLEASE--#just bear with me on this one i am going FERAL#story of my life but this was going to be a simple sketch to reward myself between deadlines and then it became a WHOLE thing /pos#(i still don't understand how to draw rollerskates!!!! or guns!!!)#but my LDR brainworms were soooo happy to get spotlight on this one akjshdsg#i am screaming endlessly about this fic I had been wanting to draw sun and his funky windbreaker for MONTHS!!#and every time you mention crescent eyes my little brain is like āDRAW THATā kasjfhdf#but so many other things kept coming up and i kept having to put it off#and then this song came along and i was like. ENOUGH. IT IS TIME!!!!!#An allusion to The Tell-Tale Heart AND disco dancing?! HELL FREAKING YEAH!!!!!#and then several reference image hunts and a LOT of colour happened and here we are :3#okay okay tag rambling is being cut off now but i just akjhsdg am thrilled to finally share this--#Please go read Love Death and Rollerskates by spadillelicious it is FANTASTIC
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A pair of Scutellosaurus have a disagreement
#scutellosaurus#sculpture#paleoart#I didn't paint the first one looking on from the first pic#other sculptor wanted to do it so I said sure whatever just keep it simple cuz I want to make a flock of these guys#and I guess he didn't believe me or something cuz he went all out on it and I got stuck trying to match that nonsense#like what the fuck dude#anyway there's 3 now but what if I made 4 smaller juveniles to go with them#can I just have a giant flock of armor birds
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favorite characters x favorite color: yok
#not me#not me the series#first kanaphan#yok not me#fcfc#rowan gifs#tuserhidden#(<3? if its ok)#and now for the usual chatter:#i love yok as a character for many many reasons largely including The Audacity#but am i gonna pretend i picked anything other than 'i think yok looks hot here' for these no. no i'm not i'm a simple man#that smiling gif is 10 frames shorter than the others and i usually hate doing that but you think i could just leave that out?#you think that's possible for me?#these are a bit less vibrant/pink than the previous purples and that's mostly because of .... the way not me looks pfft#but!! i'm v happy with the first 2. esp the first one i think it looks so good#glad to get this out now so i can take a nap b4 ourskyy..... im gonna need it
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I have no other place to yap this to so I apologise in advance.
I find it interesting in Alhaitham and Kavehās voicelines they tend to talk about each other A LOT in a way of complaining. Such as in Alhaithamās Good night voiceline where he says that heād prefer that Kaveh wouldnāt be home at all because all the chaos and noise he makes in the dead of the night. Or in Kavehās Good Morning voiceline where he says that he hopes that you don't run into someone who ruins your day first thing in the morning.
I guess itās what makes other people think that they despise each otherās company. Yet theyāre always viewed as a pair and Alhaitham couldāve kicked Kaveh out of the house ages ago. But whatās your opinion on that?
Hiya! there's no need to apologise, this is a safe space for all haikaveh! When I tell you your ask is scratching my brain I mean ITCHING, I have so many thoughts about this part of their dynamic so thank you for enabling me <3 This turned out to be rather long, so I hope itās helpful to you!
The contention in both Alhaitham and Kavehās character stories and voice lines seems to be to create intrigue about the two as individuals, and, in turn, their relationship.
Alhaithamās āgood nightā voice line instantly serves as a contradiction to his character. Itās interesting, and telling, that Alhaitham, who is essentially Kavehās landlord, and mentions this within his fourth character story, alludes to Kaveh by using āroommateā rather than ātenantā. āLandlordā evokes a position of authority over the tenant, whereas āroommateā indicates an equality between two people sharing a house ā since itās Alhaitham who advocates for the term āroommateā, itās telling that, as opposed to what Kaveh believes, Alhaitham wants to establish equality between them.
In terms of what Alhaitham says in this voice line, it explicitly raises a contradiction in the form of a question: if Alhaitham is truly bothered by his roommateās antics, why doesnāt he simply evict Kaveh?
This is relevant as this question is also posed when we initially meet Kaveh within the Archon Quest, as Kaveh states he dislikes Alhaithamās personality, to which Alhaitham responds by saying if he bothers Kaveh so much, Kaveh always has the option to move out of the house ā to which Kaveh perceives as a threat, only to then dismiss this as Alhaitham āchanging the subjectā, which seems to mean that this āthreatā is taken as baseless. As this isnāt called back to, this seems to be the case.
There is no real threat of eviction, and regardless of their disputes, Alhaitham ultimately gives Kaveh no ultimatum to move out. In fact, as discussed here (page 27), as we are meeting Alhaitham and Kaveh for the first time, Alhaitham allowing Kaveh to live with him contradicts his established character of living a life free of inconvenience. This instantly creates intrigue around his and Kavehās dynamic ā who is Kaveh to Alhaitham for this exception to be made to Alhaithamās peaceful way of life?
(An additional note of interest is that Alhaithamās solution to the noise problem seems to be more uncomfortable than calling on Kaveh and telling him to stop his work. Alhaitham says that heād rather not wear his noise-cancelling earpieces to bed, implying that he does so when noise is a problem at night. However, thereās no mention of Kaveh being stubborn when confronting this issue, which is why he takes to wearing his ear pieces, or any mention of confrontation at all. From this voice-line, it seems that Alhaitham avoids interaction by opting for the least comfortable option, which can be a contradiction to his character. As this is a rather brief voice-line, itās difficult to ascertain why, but I like the idea that Kaveh is productive at night, and Alhaitham prefers not to impose on Kavehās work process ā but this is more a headcanon than evidenced interpretation.)
Returning back to the contradiction within this voice-line, at a surface glance, this does appear to be a general complaint about Kaveh, and this can be found in Alhaithamās lines about Kaveh, and also when discussing Tighnari. Alhaitham refers to Kaveh as āoverly sensitiveā, and āconstantly making a fussā.
These can easily read solely as complaints, but when looking to the original CN translation, another interpretation can be found here. Alhaitham describes Kaveh as ācaringā or ātenderā, which is exactly how Kaveh is described within the 3.6 special program (as per minimushiroom on twt), which can allude to how Kaveh is considerate to a fault, in that this serves as a detriment to himself.
This can be seen in Alhaithamās other Kaveh-centred voice-line, in which he describes Kaveh buying keychains in order to provide meals for sick children, even though healthcare is free in Sumeru. Alhaitham clearly holds the view that this was a redundant action, as Kaveh, being in debt, most likely doesnāt have the money to spend on such investments that are, evidently, dubious.
As Alhaitham provides a rational view here, this contrasts with Kavehās act of generosity fuelled by emotion ā which highlights the contention Alhaitham has with Kaveh, in that Kaveh places himself in dangerous situations for the sake of others. However, as this can be perceived as a solely derisive line, this essential context is lacking, and can be easily misconstrued. (I think the EN translation here also coincides with this narrative, as minimushiroom notes that the original CN has Alhaitham refer to Kavehās sensitivity in a positive way, rather than contemptuously, as the English can be interpreted as.)
Kaveh, similarly, can be seen to complain about Alhaitham in his own voice-lines. This can be seen in the 'Good Morning' voice-line you've mentioned, where Kaveh complains about having to see Alhaitham in the morning, which 'ruins' his day. Additionally, Kaveh's voice-lines discussing Alhaitham refer to Alhaitham as āinfuriatingā and not wanting to give Alhaitham the satisfaction of thanking him, despite Alhaitham helping him out. However, there is more nuance in these voice-lines than Kaveh simply ādislikingā Alhaitham, as this dislike is never stated - rather that he and Alhaitham have a difficult relationship in comparison to the ācloseā friendship of their past.
Kaveh describes their relationship being a āmixed bagā, of both negatives and positives, as well as establishing a thorough understanding of Alhaitham, where other people may misinterpret Alhaitham as they ādonāt know him well enoughā. Additionally, Kaveh notes that he knows that Alhaitham can present himself in a more ālikeableā manner, but that Alhaitham refuses to do so, which refers to Kavehās contention with Alhaitham discussed within his character stories. This, in turn, generates curiosity, as it appears that Kaveh holds an in-depth knowledge of Alhaitham that the player isnāt privy to.
Referring back to Alhaithamās āGood Nightā voiceline, the question raised is, if Alhaitham has a problem with Kaveh, why doesnāt he just evict Kaveh? And the answer can be found by digging further into Alhaithamās character stories. Looking to Alhaithamās fourth character story, it states that he is aware of the dissatisfaction Kaveh may have with their living arrangement butĀ that āit matters not to himā.
This means that he is aware that Kaveh may be unhappy with having to rely on someone else for a stable livelihood, something which his pride doesnāt naturally allow, but that this is also exacerbated due to their previous falling out and the current contentions Kaveh has with him.
At first, this can seem rather abrasive, which does fall in line with Alhaithamās egoism as this doesnāt directly impact āthe selfā (discussed further here), however, what immediately follows is Alhaithamās belief that he and Kaveh are mirrors, in that his own perspective of the world will be enhanced - in the og CN, ācompletedā -by Kavehās own world view.
The implication generated here with the explicit term āmirrorā, is that, just as Alhaitham benefits from Kaveh, Kaveh, in turn, can benefit from Alhaitham. (As a side note, it is interesting then that the voice-lines in question can be seen to mirror each other ā Kaveh mentions Alhaitham in āGood Morningļæ½ļæ½ whereas Alhaitham mentions Kaveh in āGood Nightā.)
Returning back to Alhaithamās character story, rather than merely reflecting each other philosophically speaking, Iād say that this also points to their respective progression as people, not just scholars.
To me, this is reminiscent of what Alhaitham says to Kaveh in A Parade of Providence ā being ācorrectā, ultimately, doesnāt matter, as there is no ācorrectā path in life, meaning that there is no ācorrectā philosophy to shape and guide a person. Rather, Alhaitham asserts that, ultimately, their opposing philosophies are not the issue that exists between them.
The issue that does exist, then, can be surmised from Alhaithamās actions during the event (discussed further here), in which he researches into Sachin to gauge his influence over Kavehās father journeying into the desert, with implicit hopes of providing closure for Kaveh, and potentially assuaging Kavehās guilt. This is a personal act with a personal motive; the underlying motive being concern, as opposed to an assertion of ācorrectnessā.
In my opinion, I think Alhaithamās actions during A Parade of Providence are a direct reference, and fulfilment, of Kavehās fifth character story. Iāve discussed here that the main reason for the ending of their friendship was them asserting the correctness of a philosophy over the other, and proposing one philosophy as the āsolutionā to the otherās perceived flaws.
Here Alhaitham can be seen to use Kavehās past as the reason for his excessive altruism, implicitly referring to Kavehās guilt over being the supposed catalyst for his fatherās demise. This final comment of Alhaithamās appears to be the first time this has been mentioned between them, and itās enough to be perceived as weaponisation ā leading to Kaveh severing their friendship.
In A Parade of Providence, Alhaitham is shown to only have taken the role of commentator to research into Sachin, whose research we are told (by Kaveh), he has no explicit interest in, and it is heavily implied that the only reason he looked further into Sachin, was to prove to link between Sachin and Kavehās father. Alhaitham seems to want to absolve Kaveh of this past guilt in hopes that Kaveh will stop placing himself in the cycle of self-sabotage.
For me, when viewing this as a parallel, it highlights that Alhaithamās motivation in speaking out during their days as students was out of concern for Kaveh, although while holding egoism as ultimately beneficial, and therefore perceivably ācorrectā. The āissueā theyāre currently debating is not expressly stated, and although it is unclear if Kaveh understands the implication (as discussed here), as ācorrectnessā has been overturned, there seems to be little left than the personal.
Relating this back to Alhaithamās fourth character story, for me, Alhaitham referring to Kaveh as a mirror isnāt just referring to Kaveh as a scholar, but a person as a whole. As Alhaitham seeks to improve himself, personally, through Kaveh, it seems that he hopes to be able to benefit Kaveh in turn.
As for Kavehās complaints regarding Alhaitham, these can be contextualised within his own character stories. As Kaveh ultimately severed the friendship between him and Alhaitham, Alhaitham offering Kaveh to live with him, despite Kaveh revoking his previous understanding of Alhaitham (as discussed here, page 67), causes Kaveh to be overtly suspicious.
In Kavehās Old Sketchbook, it is mentioned that Kaveh believes there to be an ulterior motive for Alhaitham inviting him to share a house, as he believes that Alhaitham wouldnāt do something for someone else without an exchange.
Kaveh, then, openly distrusts Alhaitham due to this unspoken motive, and although he takes on chores to ease his sense of guilt of being a perceived burden, a contention arises here. Due to their previously ended friendship, and with how Alhaitham hurt Kaveh, and how Kaveh may believe he hurt Alhaitham (discussed here), Kaveh sees no reason for Alhaitham to want him around ā he treats their relationship as an exchange, asking what Alhaitham could possibly want for him.
Although Alhaitham views Kaveh as a mirror, and therefore, respects Kavehās perspectives, Kaveh can potentially view their opposing philosophies as a negative rather than a positive as he had done in the past (as discussed here), as it, perceivably, was what led to the end of their friendship. In this, Kaveh views Alhaitham as disparaging him and his views. As mentioned in his character story, he has no reservations in telling Alhaitham of his debt as Alhaitham has already seen through him in the past, and yet again, upon meeting at the tavern.
Although Alhaitham perceivably views him unfavourably, and his comments and complaints appear to propagate this interpretation, Alhaitham also seems to have no issue with keeping Kaveh around, and interacting with Kaveh, regardless of the problems Kaveh expressly has with him.
To Kaveh, it could be that as Alhaitham has already seen the worst of him, and appears to have no real issue with their stilted rapport, there is no point in donning a front and using niceties. He is open with his issues with Alhaitham, and, in turn, Alhaitham is open with him.
This appears to be a dual negative and positive for Kaveh, as he describes Alhaithamās constancy as āthe most unshakable part of one's past is a friend that will never changeā. In this sense, his unsteady rapport with Alhaitham is reliable, and therefore, has no reason to change.
Clearly, there is a large disconnect between Alhaithamās view of Kaveh and how Kaveh perceives Alhaithamās view of him. As previously mentioned in the discussion of A Parade of Providence, there is an unspoken āissueā between them, and this can be interpreted as dire misconceptions borne from miscommunication.
As discussed, Kaveh and Alhaitham reference each other a lot in their respective voice-lines and their character stories. This alone is enough to connect them, regardless of the cruciality of their mirror motif, as they are key figures of each otherās past, present, and seemingly, future. Despite this, itās as you say, thereās a common perception to view them as mutually disliking each other, and, to me, this is based upon their first initial interaction, and the way they refer to each other in their own character stories and voice-lines.
Itās notable that Alhaitham refers to Kaveh in his voice-lines when Kaveh is not explicitly relevant, such as in his Good Night voice-line, and, most interestingly, when Alhaitham discusses Tighnari.
This could be because Alhaitham knows of Tighnari through Kaveh, but as this connection isnāt stated, it reads as Alhaitham mentioning Kaveh for no other reason than to complain about his perceived naivety regarding relations with others. But as this is a voice-line designated to discussing Tighnari, itās interesting, and incredibly noticeable, that Alhaitham then discusses Kaveh instead. Itās similar to what Kaveh can be seen to do, and is observed to do by others, in relation to discussing Alhaitham.
When it comes to Kaveh, however, his complaining of Alhaitham can be seen to link with his process of dealing with troubles in his work. In his Hangout, he states that he takes his work to heart because he cares about it, which is expressed in the same quest in which Kaveh and the Traveller run into Alhaitham in the House of Daena (discussed further here, page 219).
Drawing a parallel here can further contextualise Kavehās complaining of Alhaitham ā if Kaveh truly disliked Alhaitham, there seems to be no reason for Alhaitham to remain so relevant to him, both in conversation, and in private thought. Additionally, Kaveh is described as an empathetic person, and when dealing with others, he is thusly seen to look for another perspective rather than act on his own subjective perspective.
Looking at his voice-line on Dori, for example, expresses his distaste for Dori pressuring him for Mora due to his debt, however, he also empathises with her, and states that he senses there must be a reason why Dori acts in such a way.
In contrast, this empathy can be perceived as missing in his treatment of Alhaitham, and therefore Kaveh complaining about Alhaitham can be perceived as blatant dislike ā which contradicts Kavehās benevolence and empathy, which A Parade of Providence particularly stresses.
Kavehās treatment of Alhaitham can be seen as deliberately contradictory, as it can cause the player to question why Kaveh reacts in such a singular way to Alhaitham, just as why Alhaitham reacts in a singular way to Kaveh.
In reference to Alhaitham, whilst Alhaitham tends to complain about Kaveh in turn, his actions reveal him. He invites Kaveh to live with him, gives no eviction date, pays for Kavehās tabs willingly, (supposedly) buys wine as an apology, and goes out of his way to ensure dialogue with Kaveh ā which contradicts his own character stories, in which he appears to favour solitude, and only greets those he considers his friends āwith a nod or twoā.
Moreover, Alhaitham is established as considering Kaveh a necessity to his āpeaceful lifeā he seeks to maintain (as discussed here), and can be seen to implicitly consider Kaveh one of his priorities within his Story Quest.
The idea that Alhaitham dislikes Kaveh seems to stem from Alhaitham being taken literally when voicing an opinion, or an issue, or simply joking, in reference to Kaveh ā despite his character stories highlighting that Alhaitham often uses sarcasm in order to subvert expectations.
Alhaitham expressly states that he prefers to be seen as inscrutable, and unknown, by the general public, and uses subversion as a means to do so. In these character stories, Alhaitham openly encourages speculation of his own words.
Without this context, it seems easy to simplify Alhaitham to purely speaking factually when first addressing Kaveh in the Archon Quest ā stating that having to explain things to Kaveh is āa nuisanceā, and yet, it is overlooked that Alhaitham stays in the House of Daena, regardless, knowing Kaveh would find him again.
On the whole, in my opinion, Kavehās feelings towards Alhaitham cannot be simplified to ādislikeā as this is dually an inherent misunderstanding of his character, and of his and Alhaithamās relationship, just as Alhaithamās feelings towards Kaveh cannot be simplified to ādislikeā for this same reason.
In the beginning, Alhaitham and Kaveh are not supposed to be perceived as friendly, as Kaveh denies the association of āfriendsā, and Paimon describes them to the Traveller as āproblematicā.
The reason for this is due to their character arcs being intertwined ā the core issue is posed in Kavehās fifth character story, in that the question is raised if a compromise can be reached, if both sides of the mirror, can be balanced. At the beginning, they are entirely at odds, but even footing must be found.
Iāve noticed a shift in online discourse after Cynoās second story quest, as the progression in Alhaitham and Kavehās relationship is noticeable ā deliberately, due to the flashback scene within their house (which Iāve discussed in detail here, page 122). To me, itās more common to form the assumption that Alhaitham and Kaveh dislike each other in the Archon Quest, but with recent developments, and, hopefully, future ones, this perception is being overturned in online communities. Perhaps thatās just wishful thinking, but Iām still hopeful!
#haikaveh#kavetham#alhaitham#kaveh#genshin impact#thank you so much for your ask anon! it really ate away at my brain#haikaveh's writing is just so !?!?!? theres so many layers to peel back so a surface read of their relationship can be misconstrued as toxi#but ultimately i think these voice lines and details of their character stories are for people to question WHY they are Like That with#each other and it's one of the things i love about them that nothing is upfront or simple it really suits their themes so well#alhaitham constantly questions the world around him and flips language on its head and kaveh challenges the world with his ideals but works#with rigid principles of design and construction and he can't tell sarcasm from genuine praise which also adds to why he takes alhaitham's#words so personally... but this is improving now?? i am saying thank you cyno's second story quest <333#also the narrative that haikaveh can't stand each other seems to be more of a western thing from what i've seen online#and i think this is possibly due to the EN translation where the CN is less derisive or abrasive?#thank you to those who translate so the nuance is pointed out! <3
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out w these tall clowns š²šø
#who up yume-ing their ocs w characters (me)#yumeship#matsukawa issei#haikyuu oc#hanamaki takahiro#haikyuu#mblue art#self insert#ocsona#or animesona either way its still an oc who may look similar to my sona š§#seijohbros au#this thing took too long (can you tell. this was for halloween. it is now 11/5 and i am queueing this)#and i keep taking it out of queue to drafts and putting it back bc im overthinking things and i rlly just need to drop it and move on</3#i love my blorbos sm they look ok in here actually but the process was shinji chair meme worthy i was suffering </3#context is halloween party das it (left is dressed up as that stabby ghostface guy. knife prop and mask not shown)--#--(he may have joked abt stabbing once. maybe a few times)--#--(right is an angel. kinda low effort/simple fit. ironic bc none of the ppl in the friend group are angels /hj)#in the group; ocsona is the closest to these two goofy mfs (not surprising i am in the utmv fandom. lots of goofy skeletons in there)--#--but the one they trust the most is the guy on the left !#((used the yumeship term bc my ocsona (specifically)'s main thing w them is platonic (i love silly shenanigans what can i say)--))#((--even if i sometimes want to rom smooch these dorks))#yearning about f/os (rom or plat) is so nice n fun you guys should do it n have fun n get some more whimsy in ur life 10/10 i recommend
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ok, well. if last time i talked about parallels between near & light, i guess itās only fair that this time i talk about parallels between mello & misa. yap central on this blog lately.
the main thing that stands out the most about mello & misa, and the reason why i will forever Defend them and their place in the story, is that in my mind they both function in a similar way on a narrative level: namely, both of them are incredibly active wild-card characters that keep the action going and the story moving forward when the other main characters like light, L, & near start getting too passive.
notably, while i often see this trait praised in mello, usually in the context of a comparative criticism of near for his overly-abundant passivity, i have also seen it used as a criticism of misa's character, that she breaks up the status quo of DN too significantly and thereby makes the story feel less realistic. this last point in particular is an odd argument to make imo, as if anything misa's presence only increases the realism of DN by adding some extra luck/random chance into the story in a way that is ultimately still character-motivated and thus easier for the audience to go along with-- something DN in general is very good at, often introducing elements through pure chance but keeping them grounded in characters enough that you almost don't even notice.
take light meeting naomi misora, for example: the only reason he runs across her at all is because he offers to run an errand for his mom on a bored laundry day, literally stumbling across her right at the exact moment she is divulging important insights she is literally the only person capable of making about kira. yet this moment does not stand out as particularly aggravating or out of place in the story, as ultimately the only reason why light is able to get out of that situation is his own quick thinking and ability to calm himself while under immense pressure, squeezing his way out of a potentially run-ending situation he didn't even know existed moments prior.
(not a fan of that big joel video, if you couldn't tell. lmao.)
point is, mello & misa both fulfill about the same narrative function in the story by being so aggressive in their actions, catching the others off guard even if their plans aren't as well thought out or careful as they could otherwise be. they're both incredibly passionate, dedicated characters as well, tough enough to take the hit when it inevitably comes, and in my opinion neither of them are nearly as stupid as the other MCs like to make them out to be. to some degree, i think both of them are aware of the fact that they can't win at the Mind Game Cold War Bullshit the others are inclined to get involved in, so they instead choose to carve out their own place in the story through sheer perseverance alone.
which, speaking of passion: one of the most interesting parallels i think you can make between mello & misa is the ways in which they idolize their respective heroes, misa's obviously being light while mello's is L. allow me to elaborate.
as this post points out, DN has some very interesting use of its religious imagery & theming, and in particular its use of christian/catholic gothic imagery in its story and especially its art. however, as op notes, a lot of this is quite superficial, ascribing to an aesthetic of "kitschy Catholicism," that was characteristic of a lot of early 2000s japanese goth style. yet, while i admit that a more serious consideration of religious elements in the art & story could add some interesting flavor to the story, i also think that, regardless of intention, the superficiality of DN's religious elements works really well in the context of this particular story. as i stated in my tags on that post: light is a superficial god. he is a fake, a scam, some idiot human that stumbled across the powers of a real shinigami and got his head up his ass about it. and a lot of the arcs of other characters in DN is about their reaction to light's claims-- whether they choose to follow him (e.g. misa, mikami), follow somebody else (e.g. mello), or follow nobody at all (e.g. near, also kinda soichiro?), and the implications that has for their lives and personalities.
this is all to say that while you can, on a surface level, connect misa & mello pretty easily as the two aggressive, fashionable blondes of the series, i also think that these somewhat superficial traits betray a greater connection between the two of them. if we understand the christian/catholic elements of misa & mello's fashion as a demonstration of their connection to not just a higher power but a lie, a superficial deity simply reflecting the sunlight of powers greater than himself, then i think we have great insight into another key element of both their characters.
do not forget: in the world of DN, heaven & hell do not exist. at least in the context of death itself, the realm & lore of the shinigami reign supreme, a point which the DN musical makes even more overt: "Isn't it a laugh? / Isn't it a shame? / Thinking there is someone in heaven to blame?" and "Going through the motions / as if there will be a reward / Oh, while we stay eternally bored!" (BEST SONGGG.) everyone is destined for the same fate of MU, the same void of nothingness awaits all. no reward, no punishment, no greater deity looking down upon us than the bored, slothful shinigami, lazing about in their realm and picking people off only when necessary (for the most part).
misa & mello are thus dedicating themselves to false idols, and we can see the negative effects this has on them in almost every facet of their character-- particularly for mello, who is perhaps more self-aware and has more of a mixed emotional outlook on his idol, but maybe even to a more extreme degree for misa. i keep going back to this idea of equating boredom with depression in DN, but where light/L/near are all "bored" in a very quiet, passive, stewing-in-bed late at night kinda way, misa & mello are characteristically a lot more aggressive and intense about it-- while neither of them are super overtly suicidal, necessarily, their actions still betray a distinct lack of care for their own safety or lives, expressing the same thematic sentiment as the others. even if they still don't straight up say it, through their actions they're a lot louder about not liking themselves, and seem to take the problems they see in the world more personally, shouldering the blame as a failure within themselves instead of projecting it outward like the others: e.g. light taking his unhappiness at the emptiness of his life at the start of the story & placing the blame on the world for "going to shit" & humanity's moral failings, versus misa being willing to literally & figuratively give up her life for KIRA the second he demands it, whether that be in the form of shinigami eyes or killing her own friends w/o second thought-- all because he was the only thing to bring justice to her own parents' deaths, an almost undoubtedly traumatizing/horrible experience for her considering how much value she places on KIRA/light afterwards.
to clarify, this is not to say that all of these characters are actually and literally depressed and/or suicidal, though you could certainly make that argument for some/all of them-- this is just one way that i think you could interpret their roles in the plot, and their thematic attachment to the story. even if DN isn't all that interested in considering the True Moral Answer to ethics/the justice system/human society/etc, it definitely takes at least some interest in the emotional viewpoints of characters in relation to those concepts, so i think this is a fair enough approach to take. or to say this another way, it's less about justifying the claim that "the world is shit," and more about trying to understand the emotional motivation & experience of feeling like the world is shit, if that makes sense.
that being said...speaking more on the whole "not liking themselves," thing: even if she doesn't say it aloud often, if ever, i think that misa is deeply aware of the fact that she was not supposed to live this long, that her existence at all is a pure stroke of luck that let her live on past her destined date. she dedicates herself to light so fully, not even necessarily expecting reciprocation (though she at least reserves herself the possibility of such), because being a disciple to her god at least gives her life some kind of purpose. similarly, i think mello is also aware of just how out of reach the one thing he wants is, how his desperation in and of itself is ironically the one thing keeping him from surpassing near and truly being #1. it's important to note that pre-time skip misa & post-skip mello are almost exactly the same age, around 20 years old at the time of their main arcs. they're immature, and in the case of mello especially, are lashing out at the world in whatever way they can because they know they don't quite fit into it in the way that they want to or should. regardless of the intent behind it, mello & misa both still make the conscious decision to kill with the DN-- perhaps in a way that still keeps their humanity, at least following near's logic, but it's a decision to end a human life either way.
anyways, going back to my previous point, this "worshiping of false idols," idea has some interesting implications-- for misa & mello yes, but also for L and the ways in which he contrasts again light, as under this logic mello's treatment kind of inherently gives L a similar status as a sort of false god/idol. which-- actually makes a lot of sense? or at the very least, viewing wammy's house as a kind of mystery cult a la the eleusinian mysteries is a neat approach to take. L & light's mutual alienation from humanity fits them both filling a false god status, anyway. also there's another thread of analysis you could follow here where near is instead fit into the role of the person mello is fixated on which AAAAAAAAA has interesting implications but jesus fucking christ, this post is long. some thoughts for another time, i suppose.
#death note#astronaut rambles#misa amane#mello#mihael keehl#mihael when he keehls you.........#damn u choc#the whole 'certified yapper' thing was kind of a joke a few posts ago fucking christ what happened to me#this ended up being about a lot more than just mello & misa oopsie#long post#had to pause in the middle of writing this cuz that ryuk/rem song is way too fucking good goddamn#...which also accidentally ended up being a couple days break. whoops#hope this one is still coherent i fear i got a bit repetitive even as the main points were quite simple =3=''#i should talk about the shinigami at some point... rem desperately needs some good meta around here aklsdfjk#sighh. all in due time#gotta post this now though so i can stop staring at it#ig it's bedtime for apples now. gotta go eepy so i can go grocery shopping tomorrow. :/#it's okay gotta feed yourself somehow#love you guys take care!!
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darkraiiiiii
#art#i was brewing up a complicated picture in my head too many factors intermingling and i put a requirement on myself that i would need to#feel a certain mood to create said picture cuz only then would it feel good and true but it was an impossible to achieve mood#and it made me miserable for a week i went to bed as soon as possible everyday to skip to the next one but today i woke up at 2am#and thought well maybe i should just draw something simple that i like it doesnt have to be high concept#so its just darkrai!!!! cuz its such a cooly! and its made out of shapes ive enjoyed drawing recently#smoking fire plumelike stuff u kno...#and i got to try out the spraypaint thing again cuz there was stuff i realized i coulda done better after the red 3 head hybrid pic#so i wanted to do it again. do u like these- with the spraypaint rendering? i will make more of them no matter what u say#but im about to go to bed now. i started the pic at 11am and finished at 8pm so 9hrs spent?! well the stenciling takes a long while in pain#i did the spraying in ms paint again and then composited it in paint net like usually.#also im typing much because the combination of coffee (which i try to make special and rare for me so it hits more cutely)#+ the euphoria that drawing gives me makes me talkative. but now.- ! im tired !! goodnight#pokemon#darkrai
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Do you love the color of the Fuuta?
(Yuno / Mahiru)
#milgram#fuuta kajiyama#i needed something simple to keep my hands busy while doing something else#and these came out way nicer than i expected??#i really want to do yuno and mahiru too -- its just too late rn ;-;#which one is your favorite#i think he looks funny and emo with kazui and kotokos palette#but im partial to the pink and purple looks from muu/yuno#blonde fuuta is... interesting...#oughghh my brain stopped being a human so now its bedtime!!! ill be back tomorrow :3#rose posts
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to all the writers here in the critical community, if you ever think that your writing is boring or repetitive or that you've used a word too many times, just know that you will never be as lazy as sjm who has used the word "gaze" 327 times across the entire series.
in order she used it:
A Court of Thorn and Roses- 40 times
A Court of Mist and Fury- 84 times
A Court of War and Ruin- 75 times
A Court of Frost and Starlight- 15 times
A Court of Silver Flames- 113 times
#I was originally looking to see how many times she calls azriel 'az' and was absolutely blindsided by the amount of times I saw 'gaze'#and so ofc I had to go looking and now I no longer suffer from imposter syndrome <3#sjm critical#acotar critical#after seeing it so many times I think I might never use the word again myself smhh#like ik it doesn't sound like a lot when were thinking in word count but omg its sooo noticeable after a while#no one is just lookin at shit it has to be a gaze it has to be intense nothing can ever be simple#gold talks.tag
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Hornigold's Izzy was the worst, of course. A version of himself that never escaped that terrible place, who lived his life as little more than an object. He still has nightmares about all the things Baz told them, about all the things he didn't.
It doesn't really surprise him, after the first ones, not at its root. To be Izzy Hands is to be someone's after all, though seeing his own face on someone so fundamentally different to him never gets less weird. The people who these other Izzys attached themselves too often left him with more questions than answers. Jack's Izzy, he can understand, from a certain view, though the man himself felt like a fever dream. The less said about Stede's Izzy the better, he's never going to forgive him for the ideas he put in his Stede's head.
Then there was Sam's Izzy.
The first thing anyone noticed about him was that he was happy. He smiled and laughed without thought, and went through life with an ease Izzy didn't think he had ever felt. The crew took to him immediately, accepting him in a way they never did the other Izzys, and certainly not their own. They prodded him and asked him endless questions, and he took every touch without a flinch and answered every question without a hint of a grumble. This Izzy was free. He was open, unburdened, trusting. He was happy.
Sam's Izzy was the one that hurt the most to see. He could accept the worst that Hornigold could've offered, that he would have suffered and been broken. It was infinitely harder to see that he had a chance to be this happy. That it slipped through his fingers.
He's never looked back before, but now? Seeing what might've been? He can't stop himself from considering the possibility that maybe he made the wrong choice back then, going with Ed.
#another little snippet from that au i am never ever going to do anything with <3#i feel like this comes with a whole bunch of asterisks that things arent this simple and sams izzy isnt only this embodiment of joy#that theres depth to him and his universe. but also yeah i kinda do have it mapped out that his life is pretty golden#but this is just a snippet; addressing the initial impression. you dont get all the izzy talking and nuances#i plan to have izzy decide hes pretty happy with his life in the end. that he's do it all again if he had to.#(you can decide if this is or isnt s2 compliant or not. i did start plotting this like. more than a year ago so. it probably isntttt#but ill probably draw from her in some regards <3 )#hes wrong about the crew too! sorta. again; its all izzys view on things and therefore subject to the mans own issues#nyxtalks#ofmd#our flag means death#izzy hands#israel hands#sam bellamy#bellhands#Sam's Izzy#i actually have no idea if i have a tag for the other couple posts i made abt this! but theres one now#shout out to my dearest sage who got this spitballed in her dms one lunchtime. u are everything to me#thank u for always bouncing izzy ideas with me and being so open to my random shit completely removed from context <3#izzyverse
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a doodle that I did a bit ago
#caluuart#genshin impact#genshin#art#haikaveh#kavetham#have not drawn them in a while! kinda miss them tbh#also it almost got out of hand (adding backgrounds n rendering) but then it was starting to look like I was trying too hard so-#-I just reverted it back to simple backgrounds#anyways! I recently helped all aranaras in sumeru!! all 76 of them. I actually only had 2 left so I was just searching.#And also I only have one more day of exams (which is like. 3 subjects left) so I'm basically free by then.#so yeah by the end of this monday I would be fully back on my shenanigans. excellent.#back to genshin: neuvi rerun! I'll be nabbing his c1 and go lmao#I would be nabbing his signature as well if it weren't for the fact that I already have 2 freedom sworns. ain't risking it#but also if the neuvi banners also doesn't seem worth to rip out the plaster i might wait until next rerun from it also.#chances are: I'll probably be getting his c1 tho. who knows.#aight im done rambling now. cya
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Another poorly made home stuck comic
#art#procreate#digital art#fanart#homestuck#hs#homestuck fanart#hs fanart#karkat#hs karkat#karkat fanart#homestuck karkat#karkat vantas#vriska serket fanart#hs vriska#vriska fanart#homestuck vriska#vriska serket#alright all the character tags are done I can yap now#These r actually very fun to make#Even if they suck :3#at least I think its a bit of an improvement from the last one!#:333#comic#homestuck comic#Idek how I came up with this idea#I just started drawing then it was done!#simple as that#!!
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*lovingly tackles Aine*
Read my Yandere! Pierro longfics first āŖ( Ā“ā½ļ½)
Last week, my beloved mutual @ainescribe surprised me with Savior! Darling fan art and AHAI9232@2-!/! CRYING SCREAMING I WANT TO LOOK AT THIS ART AND WORSHIP YOUR VERSION OF SAVIOR THANK YOU SO MUCH FOR BLESSING ME WITH YOUR ARTā
*clears throat* Anyway, now that I finally have the time to properly sit down and comment on the fan art, Iāll do just that. Feedback will be in the tags and it will be unhinged. Once again, thank you so much to Aine for drawing this <3
#feedback#fan art#ainescribe#AIIINE ;-; once again. thank you so much!! it rlly means a lot to me that you enjoyed my writing and felt inspired to draw this :'>#and as someone who loves fashion and character design. it's so so interesting to analyze your version of savior#there's so much symbolism and visual storytelling in each sketch/ outfit and i shall now proceed to pick apart each detail as best as i can#her snezhnayan fit.....god i love it. it's regal. distinctively snezhnayan. and draws attention to her--and you just know that was pierro's#intention when he dressed her in those garments. IT'S JUST SO...!! savior's wardrobe scrubbed clean of her original culture and preferences#replaced with the foreign garments of her captor's nations.....in line with this. i love how her kokoshnik and khaenri'ahn earrings are big#and attention-grabbing. you can't look at her without taking note of those accessories. it begs the question:: how many times has savior#looked at the mirror after being dressed up in snezhnaya and was unable to recognize her own reflection?? :'>#also shoutout to some details aine shared with me: 1) the face marks are inspired by weeping angels 2) the kokoshnik was traditionally worn#by married noblewomen BUT the veil was normally for unmarried women so savior's outfit can be seen as a form of compliance + rebellion#(though later on in history it became accepted for married women to also wear that veil. also my apologies if what i said is inaccurate)#lastly shoutout to savior's expression!! very poised and mysterious....due to her emotional state or pierro's rules on how to act as his#spouse in public?? we'll never know~ the first drawing hits even harder when you compare it to the next one!! such an interesting contrast~#savior in her plain attire. casual and domestic with a smile on her face....i'm guessing this is her pre-fatui version?? she looks so warm#and friendly. and i can definitely understand why pierro fell for her smile <3#also i fucking love the caption. sorry pierro but you are cursed to be a loser/ simp/ pathetic man in all of my fics and AUs xD#NOW ONTO GODDESS! SAVIOR AAAHHHH!! i love the greek goddess motifs. she looks so regal and awe-inspiring but in a different way from her#snezhnayan attire--archaic. divine. and more suited to her personal style.....yet both versions of her look so painfully isolated :'>#her blank eyes. emotionless face. and veil give me the vibes of a spooky victorian ghost...or would a statue/ portrait be more fitting??#the lack of a necklace is also an interesting design choice given what happens in the fic. and now i realized i forgot to comment on your#version of her snezhnayan necklace oops. similar to the kokoshnik and earrings. the size + grandeur makes it impossible to ignore#that and big jewels = expensive af. ohhh and i love the sparkles on her veil!! pierro rlly spared no expense in dressing up his wifey <3#it's also funny how all of these outfits are similar to my own version in terms of 'savior wore grand clothing during her glory days as a#goddess -> wore simple attire after her decline for practicality and to blend in with humans/ disassociate from her old identity -> is now#dressed in even grander clothing as the harbinger's spouse. but it's used to reinforce her new identity and pierro's control over her'#tldr:: your design is so creative and i can see the effort you put in analyzing her character and depicting her based on your interpretatio#thank you for being my mutual + reader and i hope we can share even more harbinger/darling brainrot in the future :>
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Haruka clenched his fists. āY-you would be surprised if you woke up and -- and -- and your cell was full of ice cream!
I was just thinking of this line from your last Mikoto drabble and wonderedā¦ Can you make this happen?
I certainly can >:3 I tried for a while to frame this as straight-up comedy, but it actually worked so much better as something sweet, with silly lines here and there :) Thank you so much for the request, it was so fun!! (Also, I wrote John using Mikoto's name for ease, but in my mind he's switching between first person pronouns.)
There was someone unexpected in cell 009.Ā
No, no, itās not like that. Everyone was very aware that there were two distinct residents of that cell. John himself was very aware of his position in that cell.Ā
The thing was, someone else ended up in there, too.Ā
John kept his eyes shut, feigning sleep. The other person was here on a mission. Theyād slipped in without creaking the metal door. Their footsteps were nearly inaudible against the floor. He would have thought it was Kotoko, with skills like that, but she would have leapt to an attack. This person was busy doingā¦ something.Ā
He strained his ears. It was impossible to tell their goal. They were going in and out, moving things around. Was it a trap? There werenāt enough materials in the prison to set a trap. Were they stealing things from around the room? He had nothing of value. Plus, he was sure Mikoto would have given anything to anyone who asked. What, then?
Unable to come to any conclusion, he readied himself. Heād protect himself. He always did.
In one fluid motion, he rolled out of the bed and pinned the other to the ground. The perpetrator let out a high-pitched squeak. Impossibly wide and frightened eyes looked up at him.
āHarukaā¦?ā That was the last person he was expecting. John squinted around the room. āWhat the --ā
Ice cream. He didnāt know what it meant, but thatās what Haruka had been arranging. Dishes and dishes of ice cream. Everywhere. Plates stacked on the desk. Bowls strewn across the floor. AllĀ vanilla. There was a scattering of toppings; some with colorful sprinkles and others dripping with chocolate sauce. When heād tackled the poor boy, he sent another dish of it clattering across the ground.
āIām sorry! Ah, I-I, ah, Iām sorry!ā Haruka squeezed his eyes shut. āIt-itās a, it was a surprise, for you! For M-m-mikotoā¦!ā
āA surprise?ā
āThe other d-day he said, we were, we were talking ab-bout --ā
āHe asked for this?ā
āUh, no, but --ā
āHe didnāt know about it?ā Johnās eyes narrowed. āItās some kinda prank?ā
āNO! No, n-no Iām not being m-mean. It was f-fun. A fun surprise.ā Haruka held his palms up, unable to make his smile anything but panicked. ā...Surprise!ā
John stared.
Despite how nonsensical the whole situation was, there didnāt seem to be any danger. He rose. Haruka scrambled to his feet.Ā
John gestured to the extensive supply of sweets around them. āHow did you get all this together, anyway?ā
āO-oh!ā Haruka wrung his hands. āI was, uh, planning it for a while. I requested ice cream three times in a row. And I n-never ate mine for dessert. Iāve been saving it. Es asked why, b-but they still let me keep it.ā
āAnd why did you? Why do all this for Mikoto?ā
āI t-told you, it was sup-supposed to be fun...ā
John braced himself against the desk. He was just wondering how long it would take to take care of this mess. He mused, āitās all going to melt.āĀ
He might as well have thrown a punch, the way Harukaās expression shifted. āIām sorry! Iām -- Iā¦ I didnāt think of thatā¦ā
āEh? You donāt need to apologize or anything. Itās fine.āĀ
They fell into silence. Haruka shifted on his feet.Ā
āY-youā¦ can have it, if you want. The ice cream. I didnāt let anyone else have it but-but, you can, I think. ā
āI donāt want the ice cream.ā He wanted to be left alone. He wanted the cell clean so Mikoto didn't stress out about cleaning it. He wanted to avoid being bothered by bizarre āsurprisesā first thing in the morning.
His stomach disagreed, apparently. It let out a loud grumble. Both prisoners looked over.Ā
He muttered a curse. With a huff, he picked up one of the bowls.Ā
āAlright. But even if I did eat this, or Mikoto did, thereās no way I could finish it all.ā He shoved it into Harukaās hands. āYou made this mess, youāre gonna help me deal with it.ā
The boy nodded frantically.Ā
āCome on, you can sit here. Pass me that one, with the syrup. And hurry it up.ā
#milgram#mikoto kayano#john milgram#haruka sakurai#(they hardly make a dent in it)#john makes sure haruka doesnt get a stomachache but now hes left with a cell full of dessert ;--;#maybe hed enlist the others to help...#john doesnt quite Get It - he still thinks somethings suspicious#hes never done anything just for the fun of it before#but haruka is so genuine he eases up after a bit#and ends up enjoying the ice cream at least :3#i dont think i mentioned which trial it was for the first drabble but this is definitely after john has started appearing#mikoto himself may not be ready to accept john but in my mind every other prisoner is very familiar with him#though they dont necessarily Expect him a lot of the time#es is dealing with so much t2 shit they dont really care if haruka keeps an elaborate stash of ice cream in the milgram smart fridge...#thank you so much for the request haha! this was a ton of fun :D#theyd have interesting interactions... i kept this one simple and sweet but theres a lot going on there....#drabbles
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horror's about to get his shit rocked i guess but its ok he got to say a cool line. anyways i had this silly little idea :3 horror deserves to be the one inflicting pain onto killer sometimes anyways it can't ALWAYS be killer being sadistic ššš
#killer got a bit too silly and horror had to put him in line#and by a bit too silly i mean do the wrong thing at the wrong time (when horrors in a bad mood)#i had this idea all throughout school broooo BROOOOO they hate eachother so much why do they stick around#if it were dust doing it he'd do it in silence or maybe rambling a lot of stuff really quietly to himself#but nooo horror likes to rub it in killer's face and oh shiiiit stage 3 RUUUUN#its ok its ok horror dont worry ill protect you with my totally awesome creator powers!#and then they made up and kissed dont worry this was all consensual#dust's bitches get a bit freaky sometimes dont worry it was ALL planned totally not spontaneous#i think this is one of (if not the only) times ive ever DRAWN out my short little ideas#usually i just like. imagine it and then type it out and have to figure out how to make it a hc or rant or wtvr#but i really didn't think i could capture this idea in anything but art. see this is why i dont particularly like my artstyle#this looks SO silly and goofyUGH!!!! if only my art didn't look like an 11 yro drew it#this is totally horrorkiller btw this is ship art :3#thinking about that five finger filet draft i have again about hrkl FUCK i need to actually edit that one#horror's new design looks so cool here UGH THE CLOAK!!! ITS SO SIMPLE BUT ADDS SO MUCH!!!!#mtt are one big echo chamber of negative reinforcement and improvement#they all learn to not piss eachother off but not because they respect eachother#but just because none of them wanna deal with the fighting or the insults#hey i mean...... if it works it works i guess! don't fix what's broken!#besides it's better like this anyways. what's that? actually be vulnerable and learn to accept eachother? you sound mad#they can get their therapy and positive influences ELSEWHERE!!!! TOGETHER THEY SUCK ā¼ļøā¼ļøā¼ļøā¼ļø#alright time to make some progress on swapinverse :3 i've actually been doing a lot lately!!!!#if i dont finish crash's extra facts section today let's just say that you wont be hearing from me. forever. becaus ill be killing myse#tricule art#maybe i should start the comic now...... :3333 mayhaps#NEED TO FINISH CHARACTER LORE AND THEN ACTUAL STORY AND THEN CAN MAKE COMIC
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