#this is how i feel and its my direct experience

[pingintech]

i relate to this experience in many regards i like to think of myself as an aspiring butch but in honesty i dont think i really super easily fit into femininity or masculinity 100% in either direction most people are often very truly deeply confused about my gender and consequently often seem like they dont know how to deal with me i definitely think my gender expression leans more masculine however and i dont make an effort to pass because im just me i feel i shouldnt need to conform to an ideal of femininity to be me i think i experience transmisogyny a fair bit but its definitely similarly in places where i expect my identity to be respected where people know what my gender is explicitly mostly work environments distant family members and i know for my part i constantly worry about how people see me or worry that if i make one wrong move everyone around me everyone i allow to get close to me who know who i really am will turn on me and especially because i work in a field where im watching over people younger than me (ages 14-26) in mental and behavioral health it would not be exactly difficult for one of them (or their parents) to make an allegation and suddenly all of those nasty things i suspect people secretly think about trans women being predators would be confirmed even my own kids bio dad once went on a whole rant about how he didnt trust me to raise his kid because i was a scary evil tranny (meanwhile her bio dad is literally a murderer)

frankly i think the way most other trans women discuss transmisogyny is actively a disservice to butch people of any gender cis transmasc or transfemme i think the use of terms like tna have really negatively affected who other trans women think the in group is that needs to be protected

i also dont think its a coincidence that tma as a label often doesnt include trans people who arent out yet or trans ppl with "passing privilege" fundamentally the rhetoric behind that line of thinking is only for the trans women who are being trans women "correctly" and everyone else is clearly exempt from these shared struggles

I only experience transmisogyny within a very narrow set of circumstances.

I'm loud. I'm masculine. I'm fat. I'm muscular.

I'm also a leader. When I speak, my voice is heard. When I speak, my opinion is valued. In my boots and my armor I swagger through the world with my chin up and my shoulders back. In short, people very rarely smell the tranny on me. If they do, they assume I'm a trans man.

In my day to day life I benefit from masculinity.

Transmisogyny happens to feminine transwomen. It happens when they claim their feminine gender. It happens when they step into a feminine role within public society. Transmisogyny happens when you assert your womanhood in a way that the transmisogynist can understand.

Most people don't understand my womanhood.

I don't need most people to understand my womanhood. As I've said elsewhere, it is unreasonable of me to expect a cis person to understand who I am without a lengthy explanation and at least one book. I'll enforce my pronouns all day, but respecting pronouns and recognizing gender are two different things.

I experience transmisogyny only when I need to be recognized as a woman. This, therefore, happens exclusively in queer spaces. It happens behind closed doors. It happens on dating apps. It happens in intimate moments when I let my guard down.

It happens when someone is capable of recognizing me as a woman.

That is not very many people.

Most of the transmisogyny I experience is, in fact, self-inflicted. No one is more aware of the "pervert man trying to invade women's spaces" narrative than I am. No one is more aware of the actual cis men who pretend to be trans butches in order to hit on young lesbians than I am.

In my head, there is a daily war. Desire fights propriety. Pride wars with humilty. Self-defense battles with self-expression. I wrestle with my own recognition of my own womanhood until I'm bloody and exhausted.

Like so many of my sisters, I am Guarded. Selective. Afraid. I must wade through the morass of myself before I can offer my womanhood to someone. Consequently, I have a lot of time to think.

Is intimacy worth it? Is trusting you worth it?

Is it worth it to take my armor off for you? Is it worth it to let you hurt me in a way that is so uniquely painful that the scar will stay with me for the rest of my life?

No. It's usually not.

Do I experience transmisogyny? Yes. But I don't think I experience it in the way most would understand it.

[thankskenpenders]

Thoughts on two specific areas of the writing in Sonic X Shadow Generations

The best new 3D Sonic game in over a decade (or even two, depending on who you ask) dropped late last year. And I didn't write anything about it! Sometimes life happens. Well, I've finally sat down to finish Shadow Generations, and by now everyone has already been singing its praises for three months. This is the rare instance where the entire Sonic fandom, and even mainstream reviewers, are in agreement on something. The level design is the best it's been in a long, long time and the cool factor is off the charts, embracing Sonic's peak cringe era in an incredibly confident way. It's great. If you're even reading this post, you probably don't need me to tell you that. So I won't!

No, what I'm really interested in here is the writing. Because this is me we're talking about. But I actually don't want to talk about the main narrative of Shadow Generations, which is really solid little story about Black Doom trying to mold Shadow into his perfect soldier. No, I'd like to zero in on two other aspects of the writing here: the revisions made to Sonic Generations, and Gerald Robotnik's unlockable journal.

The updated Sonic Generations script

The new package mostly presents Sonic Generations how you remember it. There are some tweaks, but it's not a major overhaul. Graphically, I don't think the game has been touched much, if at all. I certainly can't notice any difference without a side-by-side comparison, despite playing it on a PS5. The most notable update is that the game's script has been rewritten by Ian Flynn.

Naturally, this caught my attention. Generations always had a nothingburger story, so with Ian rewriting Pontac and Graff's lame dialogue there was nowhere to go but up. (I don't like to pin the blame for those games' stories entirely on them, as a ton of it was dictated to them by Sonic Team, but, well, I don't think they're very good dialogue writers.) But it's less a complete rewrite and more like Ian was brought on as a script doctor for some minor touch ups here and there. Many lines of dialogue are completely identical to how they were originally written in 2011, and many others only have slight wording changes. Ian was clearly not allowed to request additional scenes or extend the ones that already existed. He has to match the original beat for beat so that they can reuse 99% of the cutscene animations. Don't expect it to be a whole new experience compared to the original.

Still, I think the new script is an improvement, albeit a minor one. Various things have been tweaked to maintain characterization consistency. Cream calls Sonic "Mr. Sonic" instead of just "Sonic." Instead of calling Sonic "buddy," Rouge uses the pet name "Blue," like she tends to do in things like the IDW comics. Espio doesn't have to remind you in the dialogue that he's a ninja, and he no longer has a line making it sound like he has some kind of soul reading power. I also like that Modern Sonic now actually has responses to what his friends say when he rescues them, rather than being silent like Classic Sonic. They won't blow you away, but they make Sonic feel a little more engaged with everything.

In general, the altered dialogue just seems tighter to me, and some of the more childish or trite wording of Pontac and Graff's script has been altered. Here, let's actually make a direct comparison, just because this stuff is interesting to me as a writer. Here's a couple lines from after the Egg Dragoon fight late in the game, in the original script:

Modern Eggman: Ooooh... I can't believe this! I was supposed to beat you this time. Modern Sonic: Aw, I'm sorry! I didn't get that memo. I beat you every time! [Turns to Classic Sonic] No, seriously, we beat this guy every time. It's like it's our job or something!

This is a simple exchange. Eggman is mad that he lost. Sonic is unflappably confident because he always beats Eggman, and he explains this to his younger self. But the wording here isn't particularly good. Eggman's simple and direct wording makes him come off like a little kid who's mad because his older brother beat him at Mario Kart, rather than a mad scientist who just had his plans foiled. It's making light of the situation.

And I've never liked Sonic saying "It's like it's our job or something!" That doesn't feel like a thing Sonic would say, it feels like a thing an outside observer would say about Sonic. This is a frequent problem with so-called "MCU dialogue," where quips meant to echo the commentary of a casual, somewhat disinterested audience are inserted into the story itself so that the writers can be like "See? We get it. We're genre-savvy, too!" It also just reminds me of bad Sonic Boom: Rise of Lyric lines like "Rings! It's like they're made for me!"

And then here's Ian's rewrite:

Modern Eggman: I recalibrated everything! This was supposed to be my time! Modern Sonic: Oh, please, keep dreamin', Egg-head. I beat you every time. [Turns to Classic Sonic] No, seriously, we beat him every time. Our score card's flawless.

Eggman's still mad about his defeat, but the line "I recalibrated everything!" makes it more specific. He put all this work into the engineering side of his latest scheme and got tunnel vision, thinking if he got his creations just right there'd be no way he could lose. "This was supposed to be my time!" also turns it into a time travel pun, which is a bonus. He's still pitching a fit over losing, but it feels more like Eggman pitching a fit, rather than sounding childish.

And then instead of saying that beating Eggman is "like his job or something," Sonic says he's got a flawless score card against Eggman. He doesn't take Eggman seriously as a threat—at least, not to his face. He acts like it's all a game. But he conveys this in a way that feels truer to the character, rather than feeling like the words of a real world observer poking fun at the tropes of the Sonic series.

Is this amazing, A+ dialogue that blows me away? No. Again, it's not a completely different scene from the one we already had. Ian had to fit the beats of what was already there. He couldn't go all out and write an all new story confirming his longstanding headcanon that the Time Eater is a remnant of Solaris or whatever. But the wording here makes the existing story land a little better and feel truer to the characters in subtle ways.

But to me, the main change is that the Sonics and Tailses seem to have a more solid understanding of what's going on with the timeline and the Time Eater, compared to how idiotic they sometimes seemed in the original game. Which is good! No more standing outside Green Hill and wondering why it seems so familiar. Thank god. As part of this, yes, there are a few more references to past games in the dialogue, like Sonic briefly being confused about the fact that they're time traveling without the Time Stones, or South Island and Westside Island being acknowledged as the normal locations of Green Hill and Chemical Plant. Yes, ha ha, insert joke about how Ian loves references here. Look, it's Sonic fucking Generations. It's a game built entirely out of nostalgic references. Just own it! And, again, in this instance Sonic and Tails come off as less stupid when they make it clear that they do, in fact, remember their adventures from presumably less than a year ago in-universe.

Eggman, too, seems to have a better understanding of the powers he's toying with. Where in the original vesion his focus was simply on going back in time to undo his previous defeats and he seemed kind of oblivious to how much the Time Eater was actually fucking up the universe, here Eggman says he wants to use the Time Eater to give himself complete control over the entire timeline. Eggman also makes way fewer references to his own failures and shortcomings. Of course he won't admit that Sonic has defeated him time and time again. To him, he's never truly lost—Sonic just keeps delaying the inevitable total victory for the Eggman Empire.

So, yes. The new Sonic Generations script is better. It won't blow anyone away, but it's better than it was. It's been elevated from "kinda lame" to "fine." No, if you really wanna see Ian flex his ability to breathe new life into old Sonic stories, look no further than...

Gerald Robotnik's Journal

Hoo boy.

The story of what happened aboard the ARK has always been... a bit confusing, to say the least. Fans with encyclopedic knowledge of the script for every route of Shadow '05 may disagree, but it's the truth. We've had all the pieces to understand the story for a long time now, but that info was given to us out of order by a pair of unreliable narrators—Gerald, who became a vengeful lunatic shortly before his death, and Shadow, who was subjected to multiple rounds of amnesia and altered memories. Some of the ambiguity left by Sonic Adventure 2 was cleared up in Shadow '05, but that game also retconned in a bunch of new elements to Shadow's backstory (aliens!) that lead to further confusion. Not to mention the fact that that game had multiple routes and only revealed the truth about Shadow if you sat on the ultimate final boss battle for WAY longer than the fight would normally last. Or the fact that Sonic X made its own tweaks in its telling of the story. Or the fact that none of these things ever had the best English translations. I can't blame anyone who hasn't played those games in two decades for not remembering the truth about these characters and getting some details mixed up.

What we needed was something to piece together all of the info we have into one coherent backstory, told in chronological order. And thanks to Shadow Generations, we have that, in the form of an official journal tying together what we knew from Sonic Adventure 2, Shadow '05, and Sonic Battle into the tragic tale of Gerald's rise and fall.

Ian Flynn was the perfect man for the job here as the guy who started his career by tidying up the mess that was the first 159 issues if Archie Sonic. This is what he excels at: taking disparate bits of weird Sonic lore from multiple different sources, boiling them down to their most interesting elements, and connecting it together in a way that will make the audience see the dramatic potential he's always known was there. Rather than feeling like a cynical exercise in franchise building, going back and explaining things that never needed explaining so that people can add more bullet points to the wiki, he puts a new spin on things that retroactively enriches those past stories. The story here means something to the characters involved and gives us a better understanding of them as people, rather than as plot devices to motivate Shadow.

(And, of course, Ian didn't do this journal alone. He wrote the story, but I also have to give a huge shout out to Evan Stanley, who made the final product. All of her handwritten journal entries, sketches, and "photos" included throughout. The physical damage done to the journal over the course of 50 tumultuous years, passing from Gerald to Eggman to a certain special someone at GUN. The way Gerald's handwriting gets less and less legible as his mental state declines. So much love was put into what could have been a mere text dump in a menu, and it really elevates it to the next level. Congrats on officially getting hired by Sega, Evan, you've sure as hell earned it!)

The main idea the journal conveys is that Gerald was under a lot of pressure from a lot of different parties—GUN, the President, his colleagues aboard the ARK, Black Doom, even his own family—and boy did it get to him. The known incidents aboard the ARK mentioned in previous games are put together here to form a story where everything slowly spirals out of control as Gerald keeps compromising his morals to further his research, thinking he'll eventually find some way out of all this because he's a genius. I won't recap that whole story here (if you haven't already played the game and read the journal entries, I would highly recommend at least reading it on the Sonic wiki), but I'd like to highlight my favorite elements of the story, as Ian tells it here.

1) The Eclipse Cannon

Here's something that never quite made sense in Sonic Adventure 2: why does the ARK have a laser that can blow up the Earth built into it? It was supposed to be a peaceful research colony. Sure, Gerald went crazy and swore revenge on the Earth, but, like... when did he have an opportunity to go back up to the ARK and modify it? Did he have someone else do it? How? The ARK was raided by GUN and shut down! And then they arrested him, held him in prison for an unclear period of time, and executed him by firing squad when he was no longer useful! It doesn't add up. Shadow 'the Hedgehog '05 would give its own answer by introducing the Black Arms and saying that the Eclipse Cannon was always supposed to be a secret trump card against the Black Comet. But, like... we know that's kind of a bullshit answer, right? You don't need enough power to blow up a whole planet just to destroy a comet.

Well, the new journal retains what we already knew, but it paints a much more complete picture.

See, long before Gerald ever made a Faustian bargain with Black Doom, he had already made one with an even greater evil: the military. GUN gave Gerald much of the funding for the ARK, Gerald's personal utopian research station in space, but it didn't take long for GUN to start pressuring him to design them weapons. Gerald tried to get GUN off his back by personally contacting the President of the United Federation, and the President gave him an alternative: how about, instead, you just use your genius brain to figure out the secret to immortality for us, so our soldiers can be immortal? Gerald was initially sickened by the notion and found it completely absurd, like chasing a shadow... but given no other option, the sarcastically named Project Shadow soon began in earnest. (Maria would later put a more positive spin on the name after Shadow's awakening, pointing out that a Shadow can show us the direction of the light, like she says in the game itself.)

Of course, this search for the ultimate life form didn't go very well, and without any results on that front GUN kept hounding him for weapons. Gerald would throw them a bone here and there to get them off his back. His research on Chaos resulted in the Artifical Chaos prototypes, which he worried would be used for warfare but could at least theoretically be used for search and rescue missions in floods, in his mind. But that wasn't enough. So he gave them Chaos Drives to power their mechs. And that still wasn't enough. He's got Emerl. He'll give them Emerl. They're not impressed by Emerl. They'll shut the whole ARK down if Gerald doesn't give them something big.

Fine! GUN wants something big? Gerald builds a huge fucking laser cannon into the ARK. However, as a middle finger to GUN, Gerald makes it so powerful that it would destroy the Earth if it was ever fired at any target on its surface. In other words, GUN now has their ultimate weapon of mass destruction, fulfilling his contract, but they can never actually use it. Oh, the delicious irony. (And also Shadow will blow up the Black Comet with it in 50 years yada yada yada.) Is this perhaps extremely shortsighted and naive of Gerald, to believe that such a weapon would never actually be used just because of the risk? Of course. But hey, that's Gerald for you. And I love this as an answer.

(Also, this, uh, kinda echoes something from real life! Remember the bit in Oppenheimer where he says all nuclear war will become unthinkable, and Edward Teller responds "until somebody builds a bigger bomb"? Yeah, Teller went on to conceptualize a superweapon codenamed Project Sundial that would have been able to kill all life on the planet, as the ultimate deterrent for war. This was never made for obvious reasons, but hey, there's a basis for this sort of thinking outside of heightened sci-fi! There's a whole Kurzgesagt video about this if you're interested.)

2) The Biolizard

The Biolizard is, of course, brought up as the initial failed prototype of the ultimate life form, from before Gerald met Black Doom. We don't really learn all that much about it that we didn't already know, but I just love the way it's framed in the story.

As you can see above, we actually get to see a picture of Maria holding up the cute little salamander that would end up mutating into the Biolizard through Gerald's experiments. (Researchers want to figure out how to replicate salamanders' regenerative abilities for humans in real life, too, so this was a natural starting point for the project.) And then, after it grows to a monstrous size and goes out of control, Gerald has to lock it away in an unused sector of the ARK. He needs to keep the poor thing alive for his research into harnessing Chaos Energy, building life support systems directly into it, but he doesn't have the heart to tell Maria what happened. So it just becomes this first dark secret weighing on his conscience. The Biolizard becomes Gerald's Tell-Tale Heart beating beneath the floorboards of the ARK. I love that.

3) Lost Impact was the breaking point for the ARK

Remember the level Lost Impact in Shadow '05? The flashback level on the hero path where Shadow is running around fighting Artificial Chaos enemies on the ARK 50 years ago? Yeah, that wasn't just a random incident. That was important, as we now know due to its placement on the timeline.

See, Emerl's rampage aboard the ARK that was chronicled in Sonic Battle and Dark Beginnings set off a domino effect. Emerl riled up the Artificial Chaos, causing Gerald to lose control of them. They became violent, and so Shadow had to stop them, as depicted in Lost Impact. The thing is, that incident sent an SOS signal to GUN telling them that shit was going down on the ARK. Gerald didsn't fully understand the trouble he was in and assumed that he'd simply be reprimanded by the higher ups, or maybe face legal action. But, well... the next time he heard from GUN, armed troopers were raiding the ARK.

So Lost Impact was the straw that broke the camel's back. I just really like that detail.

4) Maria

And, of course, there's Maria herself. Maria has often been more of a symbol than a character, this perfect embodiment of everything that's good and pure in this world who gets killed to motivate Shadow and Gerald's revenge plots. But I really like the wrinkles this journal adds to her and Gerald's story, and their relationship. This is the most fleshed out they've ever felt.

For one, the journal leans into the idea of Maria's intellectual potential. The rest of the Robotnik family is all geniuses, after all, and she was proving to be a really bright kid. She excelled in her studies on the ARK, and she even helped design Shadow's jet skates and inhibitor rings. When Maria died, the world didn't just lose a symbolic personification of purity. She genuinely could have been a hugely influential scientist who did so much good for the world. That's what Gerald wanted for her. But we'll never know, because GUN killed her.

Speaking of her family, their presence isn't just mentioned for the sake of fleshing out the Robotnik family tree. It's mentioned that as Gerald struggled to find a cure for Maria's illness through his genetic research, he faced mounting pressure from his family. They didn't want Maria to be up on the ARK forever. They wanted Gerald to hurry up and find a damn cure, or otherwise just send her back home to Earth so she could be with her family again. She'd been up on the ARK for so long that Gerald's coworkers started thinking that she had been born up there. Eventually she gains a baby sister on Earth who she's never met. A rift forms between Gerald's two sons, and he's unable to really deal with it because he's so consumed by his work. There's this sense that the family is falling apart, and that everyone is dreading the possibility that Gerald will never find a cure and that Maria will just spend her final years up in space and die far away from her family, because Gerald just couldn't let go. If that happens, it'll break the whole family. But he can't stop now. So he just keeps working. Curing Maria is the only way to win his family back, in his eyes. It can't all be for nothing.

But my favorite detail regarding Maria is this one paragraph:

Maria is growing into a lovely young woman. It breaks my heart that someone as bright and energetic as her is diminished by disease. There are no visible effects, and I've caught my fellow researchers muttering to each other, doubting her illness. It is infuriating. I find all my reason and restraint vanishes when she's slighted.

This is SUCH a great addition to the story! It's always been true that Maria doesn't really seem all that ill, just looking at her in cutscenes. With this one little comment, Ian flips that issue on its head and turns it into a story about invisible disability. She doesn't act like she's in chronic pain, so she must not be, everyone thinks. And this really, really gets to Gerald, as does the pressure from his family. He's dedicating his whole LIFE to saving her, and they think she's faking it?! It's such a small addition, never referenced elsewhere in the journal, but it adds so much flavor to the story, as does the implied family drama. It grounds Gerald and Maria and makes them feel more like real human beings, rather than being pure archetypes. It's just enough info to let my imagination run wild filling in the blanks.

You also get the feeling that Maria being such a walking ray of sunshine was the only real source of joy Gerald had left in his life before Shadow was awakened, and the only thing keeping him from snapping under pressure sooner. All this stuff just keeps piling on, everything's spiraling out of control, but at least Maria is keeping her chin up, right? It makes so much sense that losing her would make him go off the deep end when it's framed like this.

It's just... man, I never thought I'd care so much about Gerald and Maria. But that's the Ian Flynn touch. After years of less than stellar Sonic writing that seemed to be embarrassed of itself, I'm so happy to have new games coming out that fully embrace the history of the series like this, making its world feel so rich and real instead of just serving as an excuse for a string of platforming levels. I don't even like Shadow '05, but I'll be damned if Ian and the rest of Sonic Team didn't make something amazing by "yes, and"-ing Shadow's cringe past here. Sonic has truly reached levels of "we're so back" never thought possible.

[bigassmoth]

Something so enticing about a post-apocalypse yandere

Someone dependable who you know will never ice you over resources or possible death. Its scary at times, they seem to consider killing you so "you wouldnt have to endure anymore", but their intense affection for you always wins out.

They dont let you do any dangerous work, so you are put in charge of the base camp. There is only the two of you- and there will never be anyone else. Your companion cannot share you- but they will insist its because outsiders will be a liability and ultimately betray you. So socially isolated you assume your companion has good intentions. When they touch your face, tuck your hair behind your ear, inhale your scent when they hug you- contact they want before they leave the safety of the base. You are lonely too, which is why you let them slide into bed with you and wrap their scarred arms around you. So desperate for human contact that you feel yourself getting wet and hot when their breath tickles your ear.

"Ah...you should have told me. No- it's my fault that I didnt notice sooner." Their voice is so soft and gentle- a voice that has walked you through so much panic and grief. Their rough hands are on you, stroking your legs and ass at a slow pace.

"We should do this...so you can get some sleep." Their fingers dip into your underwear. You dont know how much time passed and how many shuddering orgasms you unleashed with your body pinned between theirs and the wall. Their fingers worked you again and again with a lazy roughness- a result of their marred skin and dexterity. While their mouth lavished your neck with gentle but wet kisses.

Any number of excuses pop up. They join you in the shower, they pull you into their lap during breakfast, they steal your attention from your games.

"To keep your stress down"..."To make sure youre healthy"..."Mental enrichment"..."To save on water"

Of course you dont need any excuse when you kiss the corner of their mouth and ask them to fuck you into oblivion.

As time wears on and resources bounce back from a lack of predation while nature reclaims the space, your survival is easier. They scavange for toys as your lazy days have facilitated frequent fornification.

What you will never know is the number of other survivors they encountered. Some matched their wariness and they parted with a mutual understanding. Most were friendly- wanting to tag along with them or recruit them to their group after witnessing their survivor skills. "Of course we always welcome more hands! Are you traveling with anyone else?" They dont answer, no one needs to know about you. Persistant individuals are killed- they dont trust that some annoying liability wont follow them back to you and attempt to persuade you directly.

When they come back they are extra clingy. Burying themself into your embrace as soon as they have cleaned up. Your gentle hands on their scalp and back, your concerned voice.

"If we ever met other survivors, would you want to join them?" You assume they are distressed after another isolating experience outside.

"Hm, if you trusted them then yes I would. It would certainly lessen your workload." You comfort them, "Im sure we will meet someone at some point. It cant possibly be only us."

They take your comfort in a different direction. Its fine that they killed that enthusiastic man today- because they didnt trust them. You wouldnt mind living with out people, so there was no other survivors they could ever trust. Elimination was necessary.

They grumble their agreement while falling asleep against you. Your complaints about needing to get up and make dinner fall on deaf ears. Once they feel like it they will prepare food, lovingly provide and care for you the way that only they are allowed to.

[flwrior]

ㅤㅤㅤㅤㅤㅤㅤㅤCAN'T GET YOU

ㅤㅤㅤㅤ❀﹑ 𝖸𝗈𝗎 𝗄𝗇𝗈𝗐 𝖨 𝖽𝗋𝖾𝖺𝗆 𝗒𝗈𝗎, 𝗋𝗂𝗀𝗁𝗍?

엔하이픈 형선 ୨୧ when they can't get you out of their head , fem reader | 𝐖𝐀𝐑𝐍𝐈𝐍𝐆𝐒 kissing, skinship, (m/o) smoking/addictions ﹑ （taglist）

✉️ ,, why is jaehyun in the military x2

𝐇𝐄𝐄𝐒𝐄𝐔𝐍𝐆

Seeing you for the first time was like a dream to him. You sat on the swings, gently swaying from the wind brushing against you. Moving in your direction, he sat beside you, surprised at your eagerness to strike up a conversation. “I’ve never seen you before.” Grinning in his direction, you cocked your head to look at his dark eyes, watching a gentle smile tug at his lips. 

It was official, you were never leaving his head after that. You waited for him during every break by the swings, staring at him with your teasing eyes. Darting in the hallways together became a habit until it led to him walking you home every evening. “Can I tell you something?” He spoke through the usual hiss of cicadas in the summer. Humming, you matched his footsteps with yours, catching his gaze. 

Placing your hands on his shoulders you eased him into saying what he wanted, knowing his tendency to hesitate. “Ever since I met you on the swings,” He started, taking a deep breath, meeting your listening gaze firmly. “I can’t get you out of my head.” Smiling casually, you took a few steps towards him, closing up the distance between the two of you. “Not surprising,” Locking your fingers around his neck, you began, “Because I feel the same thing.”

𝐉𝐀𝐘

The school rooftop had always been his thing. Nobody ever bothered him or decided to invade his space until you walked in. Leaning over the school balcony, you weren’t expecting company and neither was he. Inching closer to you, he tapped your shoulder, forcing you out of your daze. Turning to look at him, his sharp gaze softened for a moment before returning to its original state. 

He looked at you intensely, watching as you challenged him with that same intensity. “What?” You asked, trying to remain as nonchalant as your body would allow. Suddenly at a loss for words, he pulled his tie uncomfortably. Breaking the eye contact, he moved beside you, leaning over the balcony and pulling out a cigarette. Scrunching your face in disgust, you pulled the object out of his hand, crushing it with the heel of your shoe. 

“What exactly was that for?” He complained, watching your actions as you leaned your chin against your arms, turning your head to face him. “Put your lips on something else.” You challenged, catching the teasing glint in his eyes. “Really?” He murmured, leaning into you but pausing within inches from your face. Noticing his lack of movement, you nudged your face forward, pressing his lips into a kiss. The bell ringing interrupted the moment. Separating from his lips, you neared the exit. “Find a better addiction.” You spoke, watching his face light up into a grin. From the grin you mirrored back at him, you were the only thing he thought about since then.

𝐉𝐀𝐊𝐄

Falling in love with you wasn’t what he was expecting when he met you in the summer on the beach. Knowing how easy it is to find a summer fling, he instantly caught your figure tanning in the heat of the sun and decided that you would be his next target. Clearly unaware that you had more experience in this than him, he was taken aback at your eagerness to flirt back at him, creating tension that never seemed to be satisfied. After deciding that you were a permanent feature of his summer, he followed you around the entirety of summer until it was coming to end. 

Resting your body on the beach, you sat beside him, feeling his body exude heat. Momentarily sitting in silence, you allowed the calm sunset to wash away the worry you had been feeling, knowing that you were probably never going to see him again. “How does it feel knowing you’re never going to see me again?” You joked, trying to ease up the tense atmosphere. Turning to meet his gaze that was already on you, you watched a sly smile grow on his face. 

“It sucks.” He spoke, gazing into the burnt orange sky. Playfully punching his shoulder, you shot a grin in his direction. “Look at you getting all attached.” You spoke, trying to mask the fluttering in your chest. Feeling an odd sense of seriousness from the boy, your grin dropped. “Don’t tell me you’re actually sad about this.” Raising his eyebrow in your direction he sighed heavily. “Don’t tell me you’re not sad about this.” Waves crashed against the shore harshly before retreating back to the ocean, distracting your mind from your wandering thoughts.

“You do know that I can’t get you out of my head, right?” Moving to face him, you caught his burning stare. “I know,” You started, inching towards his lips. “Neither can I.”

𝐒𝐔𝐍𝐆𝐇𝐎𝐎𝐍

It was already dark by the time you stumbled into the convenience store, finding no one by the cashier aisle. After choosing what you wanted to buy, you looked around for the familiar college student that never seemed to want to do his job. “Oi cashier boy!” You called, knowing how easily you could get him out of his hiding spot because of the nickname. 

All of a sudden, a figure popped out from the bottom of the till, bumping his head against it. You definitely knew it was not the same boy. “Oh my gosh, are you okay?” You asked, dropping your items on the counter and springing up on your toes to examine his forehead. Realising your panicked behavior, you dropped your hands from his head and finally looked at the new cashier. 

A red tint coated his pale skin, resulting in a million apologies from you. Insisting to help him bandage his forehead, he gave in to your persistence, leading you to the back after paying for a pack of band-aids. Trying not to make eye contact with you, he silently analyzed your face, watching you blow hot air on his forehead to cool the injury. “Sorry for startling you,” You began, noticing his breath hitch at the sound of your voice. “I thought the other cashier was on his shift today.” He winced at the cool ointment touching his skin. 

“It’s fine. I was just covering for my friend since he says he’ll be late.” You hummed at his answer, placing the frozen themed bandage on his forehead. Getting up from your seat, you made your way out of the storage room. “So I’ll see you around then, temporary-cashier-boy.” You spoke, shooting him a wink. “And don’t forget to look at your bandage before you get back.” 

Following you soon after, he pulled out a mirror, finding an Elsa bandage with your number written on it. While smiling into the mirror, the one who was actually supposed to be at his shift appeared. “Why are you smiling? And what’s with the girly bandage?” 

“It’s nothing.” Sunghoon answered, tattooing his mind with your everything.

all rights reserved, flwrior

[aalinaaaaaa]

Author Ask Tag

Thank you to @tildeathiwillwrite for the tag <333

—

What is the main lesson of your story? Why did you choose it?

In reference to Obsidian Sapphires (because that’s the wip whose theme and message I’ve fleshed out the most), the core lesson would be to not let ambitions of grandeur, perfection, divinity, etc derail you from the things you have/the people you love, and that even the most seemingly perfect solutions can still cause tragedy. The central identity of Obsidian Sapphires was always in relation to family, personal identity and the Allaitri Chalice was central to Eshani’s goals even from the first ever draft. This draft focuses on the Chalice and its ramifications as a result of it being openly used in society.

What did you use as inspiration for your worldbuilding?

A lot of it is inspired by my perspective, my experiences, etc. It draws heavily on certain aspects of my home country, and also some of my own thoughts too. For instance, Helindians being maestros at non-alcoholic fruity drinks derived from my own wish fulfillment! I don’t drink, I’ve never had a drop of alcohol in my life.

It also contains a lot of nature, because it’s a direct contrast to how sterile and corporate the real-world is and I think it really helps make the world very aesthetic, very alluring, somewhere that people would get sucked into and never want to leave. A faerie-style honey trap, if you will.

I'm going to give a specific mention of Morilaste, for it takes a certain amount of its inspiration from Italian art and history. This really became apparent after my visit to Milan and Venice, because I was in awe at the art and architecture. The scale, the details, the artistry, everything. Absolutely stunning. I find that when I'm in or near places like cathedrals and other highly grand, artistic structures, it feels otherworldly. I am awestruck that people made these, that people put funding, time and effort into these grand structures, and we get to benefit from the fruits of their artistry hundreds and thousands of years later. (This is why minimalistic, corporate-hellscape buildings of the modern age break my heart)

And it's that sense of otherworldliness that I want to evoke when designing Morilaste, because I want it to capture the aura of divinity that the court's namesake sought for. I want to use the sheer scale of it to encapsulate just how much of a beautiful, deadly trap it is, and how it contrasts and complements the way ordinary Helindians perceive it from the outside, with basically nothing but rumours and stories to rely on.

What is your MC trying to achieve, and what are you, the writer, trying to achieve with them? Do you want to inspire others, teach forgiveness or help the reader grow as a person?

Alycja’s trying to prove herself to others, reclaim her innocence in the face of those trying to misconstrue her motives. She wants to be loved, she wants to be admired, and her ordeal is coming at a time when she’s at the start of her teenage years, a pivotal time when she is beginning to flesh out her own identity separate from her identity as part of her family. Her arc is one of the most prominent ones in terms of the theme, because her choices threaten a touch of tragedy almost no matter which path she takes. In a sense, it’s a warning to not let others take advantage of you, and also an affirmation that there is a lot of power in one’s own decisions, even in the face of things that are outside of one’s control.

As for Eshani, she’s also trying to prove herself, but more to repair relations with the people she cares about. She knows what she wants, but her arc is about actually confronting the reality of her desires, and her realising that she wasn’t ready yet. This occurs all while balancing the responsibilities of her current place in life, trying to claw her way out without betraying so many people. She carries a lot of guilt, and the message I want to portray through her endeavour is that the past is the past, it cannot be changed, but the next best thing is to do something now, in the present. Dwelling on what could’ve been is what sets her back, and I look forward to the part where her character development fully clicks into place, I think it’s kinda beautiful (and it fits with the theme and her goals :DDD)

How many chapters is your story going to have?

I’ve an estimate of 30, but this could easily change.

Is it fan fiction or original content? Where do you plan to post it?

Original content, planned to go on my blog :D

When did you start writing?

Wow, it’s been ten, going on eleven years at this stage!

Do you have any words of encouragement for fellow writers of writeblr? What other writers do you follow?

Don’t give up on your ideas! And especially don’t delete them. Stash them away, let them ferment, make sure they’re written down somewhere (and not just on a computer, physical notes are important too). You’ll never know when your ideas may germinate and go full circle. And even if they don’t go anywhere, there’s value even in those ideas just existing. (Side note, people love deleted scenes and snippets!)

I follow so many fantastic, talented, creative writers on here (and I know a decent amount in real life too!), that I would break the tags per post limit so many times over. For the writers that I mention here, consider yourselves tagged for this game, and also here’s an Open Tag for anyone/everyone who wants to answer these <3

@seastarblue @bardic-tales @ominous-faechild @leahnardo-da-veggie @the-ellia-west @vesanal @thebookishkiwi @jev-urisk @cljordan-imperium @ieppiq @angelfevr @gioiaalbanoart @guessillcallitart @thereadingfoz @honeybewrites @oliolioxenfreewrites @theglitchywriterboi @corinneglass @rae-butter @oros-ash3s @mundanemoongirl @scarletteflamerald @midnight-and-his-melodiverse @ceph-the-ghost-writer @flock-from-the-void @tryingtimi @outpost51 @mattresses-and-macaroni @limitlesswritingvoid @agirlandherquill @space-writes @winterandwords @finickyfelix @wintherlywords @druidx @avrablake @inkednotebook @lizardperson @ineedaplacetostay @gaslightwestern @satohqbanana @acertainmoshke @sleepyowlwrites @talesofsorrowandofruin @talesfromaurea @the-golden-comet @bi-focal12 @write-with-will @glassstardust22124 <333

[therookerydatv]

This is a non-Veilguard post but it is a Solas post and a Varric post so buckle in.

Background: I joined a Veilguard Discord server because I'm insane, and we were discussing Cole and the whole choice to make him a Spirit or more Human, and it almost got into an argument but thankfully it figured quickly, but I was still thinking about it because something about it all rubbed me the wrong way. A lot of people lamented their choice in making Cole more Human or cheered that making Cole more Spirit was the correct choice because of Solas' own regrets and pains that came about from him gaining a mortal body.

Subjectively I have always chosen to make him more human, but I guess me choosing as a player is different from within the context of Inquisition. In DA:I every choice you make has consequences, sometimes trying to backpedal out of a choice once you're far enough in will result in you not getting your way because that's what it all is, Choices and Consequences. As much as the result of Cole's change is on you the player, it's really a Consequence of your favoring Varric or Solas' method.

Solas' entire view of Cole's predicament is colored by his own negative experience of having a body and living in the physical world, waking up to a physical world where the Veil was created just amplifies that regret in pain, every instance of him trying to help with his Wisdom becomes something worse to him personally (All that Wisdom and he can't help himself) but with Cole he actually can help! He can fix this, with not only Wisdom but experience! He's become a person, he doesn't like being a person(and then he does because of the Inquisitor, I feel this is true romance or friendship), so Solas knows that Cole can 'return'(made) more Spirit and the confliction will end.

Varrics positions, his view, I feel is colored by the people he couldn't help, the ones he couldn't help get their revenge or solve their problem in time in a way where no one could get hurt (Cole literally reminds him of Anders just in reverse) And this time, Varric knows better, he knows how to fix this, he knows how to not blow up the Chantry, he can fix it this time. (This time the love will be enough!!)

Objectively, both are answers, I don't think either of them are right, because it's one influence over the other, but a choice has to be made otherwise he'd become a demon.

Solas and Varric are having their idealogical battle(custody battle) over which direction Cole needs to go in to avoid binding or demonhood(which college to send him to). The added layer VG adds to this and every banter Solas and Varric have is also fascinating, because outwardly it's an Elf and a funny Dwarf fighting over the tall awkward Human child, but after VG??? After those regrets??? Girl...

But I feel that reducing that scene to Solavellan at times is... disingenuous, when really, it's a Solvarric scene of we're being objective.

This is THE custody battle of all time. (My weed kicked in bear with me)

Solas' version of his world doesn't exist anymore, the world with no Veil and spirits essentially pillaging the bodies of the Titans to gain bodies doesn't exist anymore, the first victims of what the Elvhen did calls him Chuckles, a demonym in true friendly jest to him, it's the first thing Varric calls him when he reaches out to talk to him at the beginning of Veilguard, up until that point he calls him Solas, the Dread Wolf, Fen'Harel.

Varric is a result of years of time happening to the version of the World Solas brought about. Its...it's like God is talking to a creation of his that has every right to hate him, to want to desire to go back before all the bad shit, and instead Varric says, okay, get the anger out, how do you feel now? Empty? That's okay too, take your time.

Solas is a weary traveler ready to end it all and Varric is the equally weary traveler who says, tell me about it, and then talks your ear off so much you start believing in the world again.

Basically, Varric's method is to embrace the history and the scars, embrace the hurt and once it's done, get something to eat. Varric forgives but doesn't forget, his plan has Cole let go of his anger in the end, but Cole will remember the hurt he felt, and inflicted and so will the people he inflicted them on.

[windvexer]

Hello! I saw your response to another anon on visualisation, and your post about visualisation vs trancework. I'm just wondering if you wouldn't mind elaborating on the differences on the two, or point me in the right direction if you already have? I can visualize just fine, but I have an issue with figuring out if it's my imagination, or if it's really happening, and how to put it to better use. Thank you!

All the following is just in my opinion, etc.

IMO visualization and trancework aren't in the same category. This is like comparing and contrasting chanting an incantation with astral travel.

To me, visualization is a vehicle. It is one way to transport power between things, or to transport yourself between things. There are manifold other vehicles that can be used in its place.

Trancework is the practice of achieving an altered state of consciousness. This is something that can be measured in your brain waves.

This can be done through a wide variety of means - ecstatic movement, sonic drivers, breath work, meditation, repetitive chanting, mindful relaxation, use of entheogens, etc.

In fact, it is possible to use visualization as a vehicle to help enter trance state.

Modern practitioners may find it easier to enter trance state if they work with classical trappings now often discarded as superfluous - working in dark or dim rooms, fascinating the gaze, controlling the breath, reciting incantations, preparing sacred spaces, and so forth.

This may sound like a bit of work, and it's true; learning how to change your brain waves on command is not a fast or simple process.

The utility of the trance state is that (in my opinion) you have loosened your consciousness from the strict confines of your daily HUD, and descended into something both deeper and more connected.

I hesitate to speak too closely on the exact experience of magical trance. But do you know how when you cast a magic circle, it's supposed to bridge between this world and the otherworlds, so that whatever you do happens in both places at once?

Achieving trance is like the personal version of that; you both descend and arise into a place where you personally exist between worlds. And it feels quite lovely and strange and nice, and very important things happen there.

Once you are in a state of trance and you have properly entered magical headspace (which is a third thing that is neither trance itself nor visualization), then yes you could use visualization as a harness to transmute power. Or perhaps you'd rather chant an incantation, or draw a picture which comes true as you make it, and so forth.

[unsanctioned-if]

"Unsanctioned" demo will be up again soon

Having spent the past two days experimenting with speech to text and seeing how it feels to write, I have discovered that the former is very difficult to do for me when it comes to fictional writing which tbh I suspected would be the case, and the latter is also extremely difficult for me to manage with the injury even when it comes to coding and editing. It can be done, but...very slowly. In my last post I said that I would wait a week, but unfortunately I don't think it will make much of a difference.

With that in mind, I have decided to put the demo out (still) in its incomplete state. I will get back to working on it as soon as I am able to. Hopefully it should still be a smoother experience now compared to when it was released last month.

In the meantime, I will focus more on brainstorming, world building and working on stuff that doesn’t require as much direct writing and coding.

I also want to address the feedback I've gotten and the errors people have reported. I have tried to get to all of them, but some I have not been able to locate. I think it could in part be because of the different race + background variables to consider and how these sometimes mix and give different text. I have probably missed some entirely because of my own inattentiveness as well, and for that I’m sorry.

If you play the demo and notice errors or oddities, it would be very helpful and appreciated if you would send a message to my inbox and attach a screenshot so that I can see exactly where this happens since it is so much easier to find the errors exactly that way. Thank you so, so much to everyone who has been helping me with that <3

I will also get to answering more asks. I will try doing it using speech to text and then fixing it to make it sound somewhat coherent like I am doing right now. Sorry it's taking me so long to get to them.

I hope that I can get back to working on this story soon - if you read it and have any thoughts on it I would love to hear them!

[clytemnestradidnothingwrong]

"It truly amuses me"

If you find it funny, then why did you write a long whiny essay about how women should be nicer to the men who abuse, rape, kill, and violently oppress us?

"Yet, today, we often see narratives that feel less like calls for justice and more like a reversal of the very prejudices feminism was born to dismantle."

No, we don't see this at all, you're just a garden variety misogynist who thinks women not tolerating or calling out men's behavior makes us "just as bad".

"Feminism was a movement born to provide women with the basic human rights they were deprived of, to challenge a society that made life a living hell, not just for women, but for men as well."

No, actually, feminism was never for men.

"It sought to create a world where opportunities and rights are determined not by gender, but by actual skills and merit. So, when did it become a weapon to belittle or demonize men?"

Whiny MRA "misandry is just as bad as misogyny" ass shit.

"The problem is that this shift toward misandry isn’t just theoretical; it’s real."

There it is! I startled my cat when I laughed at this.

"Unfortunately, for some, the lines have blurred. The war against patriarchy has been replaced with disdain for men."

"Unfortunately, women stopped fighting the vague concept of "the patriarchy" and went after the creators of patriarchy instead"

"Personal grievances have turned into sweeping generalizations,"

Let me guess, before you sat down and shat out this steaming pile of crap, you were busy lamenting how you can't enjoy Good Omens yaoi anymore.

"and the true essence of feminism; building bridges and breaking barriers seems to be forgotten. This misinterpretation is harming everyone."

And by "everyone", you mean men. No woman is harmed by women rightfully hating men.

"Social media has become a breeding ground for narratives where men are demonized for simply existing, as if their gender is the cause of all societal problems."

I thought women's long history of global systemic oppression had a source, but no, it just appeared out of thin air! I'm so stupid! /s

"While critiquing the harmful aspects of patriarchy, some have taken it to an extreme, implying that men are inherently oppressive, that their actions are always rooted in misogyny, regardless of context."

We're not implying it. We're stating it.

"The idea that all men are privileged, that they cannot experience hardship, is a gross oversimplification."

So is this. "Saying men are privileged means you don't thin they can ever experience hardships" - these men you're defending so valiantly wouldn't piss on you if you were on fire. Or if they did, it would be purely because pissing on a woman gave them a boner. Please get up off the floor already.

"Yes, patriarchy has historically benefited men in certain ways, but it has also shackled them; forcing them into rigid gender roles, stifling emotional expression, and limiting their freedom in ways that many fail to acknowledge."

Men created patriarchy. Men created these rigid gender roles. Men decided men can't cry. This paragraph is beyond stupid. Limiting their freedom? Are you on CRACK? Would you say this about White people and White supremacy?

"But the solution isn’t to tip the scales in the opposite direction; it’s to balance them. Feminism isn’t about proving one gender is better than the other; it’s about dismantling systems that have oppressed women while ensuring fairness for all. Feminism, at its core, should be a call to break free from these restrictive molds, not to create new ones."

Pretty words, except you're using them to defend women's violent oppressors.

"Men, like women, suffer from a system that enforces damaging stereotypes and limits human potential."

No, they don't.

"A true feminist society would uplift everyone, regardless of gender, recognizing the commonalities in our struggles while celebrating the differences that make each of us unique."

This is humanism, not feminism. Your "all lives matter feminism" is useless and unnecessary. Men are our oppressors. They are the reason women struggle. We don't have any fucking "commonalities in our struggles".

Again, would you say this to Black/Asian/Latino/Native people about White people? No? Then stop saying it to women about men!

"How can we achieve inclusion if we exclude half of the population from the conversation?"

Fuck "inclusion". Men are not the default nor the standard of humanity. I do not want to be included with men, I want to be LIBERATED FROM MEN.

It truly amuses me how, in the name of feminism, some have strayed toward misandry. Wasn’t feminism meant to empower women? To stand for equality, not superiority? Yet, today, we often see narratives that feel less like calls for justice and more like a reversal of the very prejudices feminism was born to dismantle.

Feminism was a movement born to provide women with the basic human rights they were deprived of, to challenge a society that made life a living hell, not just for women, but for men as well. It sought to create a world where opportunities and rights are determined not by gender, but by actual skills and merit. So, when did it become a weapon to belittle or demonize men?

Unfortunately, for some, the lines have blurred. The war against patriarchy has been replaced with disdain for men. Personal grievances have turned into sweeping generalizations, and the true essence of feminism; building bridges and breaking barriers seems to be forgotten. This misinterpretation is harming everyone.

The problem is that this shift toward misandry isn’t just theoretical; it’s real. Social media has become a breeding ground for narratives where men are demonized for simply existing, as if their gender is the cause of all societal problems. While critiquing the harmful aspects of patriarchy, some have taken it to an extreme, implying that men are inherently oppressive, that their actions are always rooted in misogyny, regardless of context. This is not just counterproductive; it’s dangerous. The idea that all men are privileged, that they cannot experience hardship, is a gross oversimplification. Yes, patriarchy has historically benefited men in certain ways, but it has also shackled them; forcing them into rigid gender roles, stifling emotional expression, and limiting their freedom in ways that many fail to acknowledge.

women have faced and continue to face systemic challenges. But the solution isn’t to tip the scales in the opposite direction; it’s to balance them. Feminism isn’t about proving one gender is better than the other; it’s about dismantling systems that have oppressed women while ensuring fairness for all. Feminism, at its core, should be a call to break free from these restrictive molds, not to create new ones. Men, like women, suffer from a system that enforces damaging stereotypes and limits human potential. A true feminist society would uplift everyone, regardless of gender, recognizing the commonalities in our struggles while celebrating the differences that make each of us unique.

How can we achieve inclusion if we exclude half of the population from the conversation?

[puppysdog]

i do wish there was a way i could talk about how i cant trust anyone using the pan label due to the years of transphobic bullshit i got from that side as a bisexual, and how its so normalized and modernized to say pan instead of bi now, especially by big name companies and celebrities, that the transphobia is making a come back because we never were fully able to address the issues with the online resurgence origin of pansexual without being called mean transphobic bisexuals. like it’s heartbreaking and infuriating that these should be my queer siblings but instead i get told that im transphobic for being bi, something thats both my gender AND sexuality, because a more “inclusive” term came around, despite the fact that bisexuality has always been inclusive. I WANT to be in solidarity but how am i supposed to do shit when some 18 year old thinks theyre higher and mightier and the top of the inclusivity chain for using a different label and erasing years upon years of queer history for bisexuals

[turtleblogatlast]

[ cw: violence mention / death mention / ]

Will never stop thinking about how Leo, all alone in an endless void and being beaten again and again and again by the only other living thing around, still finds comfort in that space. The situation he was in was completely hopeless, and in any other circumstances he would not have escaped, at least not fast enough to save him from permanent (or even fatal) damage, be it physical or mental.

And yet, despite the bleakness of his situation, despite the agony and helplessness, all he needs is one glance at a crumbled photograph, one glance to remember his family, and that’s enough of a reason for him to smile.

Maybe that’s why his powers center around manipulating space - because no matter how much space is between them, no matter how dire his own situation may be, just the thought of his family, alive and okay, is enough to give Leo hope.

[silvesi]

✨️MESMER PROPAGANDA!!✨️

Daily enrichment for Fedsy (On his way to flirt with and manipulate the workers of New Kaineng so they will let him try a sip of the tasty green liquid in the power plant core 😫)

[dailytraingirl]

btw i made a post sometime here about being in a restaurant or something and hearing teenage dream and thinking of larry stylinson because of that one video of them singing it

anyway like two days ago i went BACK to that restaurant and they played just the way you are AND viva la vida

it actually made me feel like i was going insane

[lemongogo]

need 2 find myself again in 2025 . tbhwu

[mrpenguinpants]

Omg you're back again hello 👀 how have you been????

Big mood on the "man I wish this author would finish their fic" LOL I've been rereading my own wiring recently and going wtf. Where's the rest of it?

For a limited time only babyyy

But I've been good. Extremely busy but it's okay, the pto is worth it. That's what I keep telling myself at least :) but how are you??? Is anything interesting happening? New developments perhaps 👀

The funny thing is that I've actually been talking with a few mutuals, and they've all told me that they recently went back to re-read their drafts. Maybe it's something in the air or we're all feeling a bit nostalgic? Or because everyone is on break since it's summer.

[oh-cramity-its-amity]

i love my friends so much. i feel like yesterday i had a lot of shit going on in my head and i woke up to my friend explaining things in a way that put my mind at ease. i dont feel as anxious anymore because i know i was overthinking. i think my dad said it best when he told me that he thought my wonderful brain of mine just wants to think problems are bigger than they actually are. he is right! im just inexperienced in life and half of the time im scared im doing something wrong but- HEY. i need to be more confident in making mistakes. making mistakes doesn't define me as a person!! i need to stop worrying about doing life right and just live for the sake of living and doing what makes me happy!!!!!!!