#this is going to be a disaster

[deadpresidents]

Mike Johnson is the least experienced Speaker of the House in 140 years.

[hyewka]

"You're so pretty." he mumbles in daydream haze, looking at you through fluttery eyes.

"What?"

He scrambles, adjusting his posture as he blinks rapidly, clearing his throat. "I meant, uh, you're so hot. Let me smack that ...ass?"

Your face scrunches up, cringing. "That's even worse."

[thebubblybutcher]

Hmm, zhey veren't lying.. How interesting.. It does not look bad, either. Humm, so, zhis transformation.. I do have a few questions! Vhatever you became.. ah, it altered you slightly in the mental region as vell, ja? Vhat a study zhat could be! It is interesting how zhis changes ones silent perspectives.. I vould guess you are experiencing cravings? If I could run a few tests, I could set you up vith a few bodies! Aheh, I may be a little curious, but it could be a 'trade', no?

she whips her head toward the medic before he even speaks, seeming to know who was coming. she looks very excited and appears ready to lunge at him, but then her face twitches a little and she instead takes many steps back.

"hi doc!! i was fixing to see what'd you'd make of this! eh, would you mind standing.. a few feet away? i'm finding it very difficult to control myself lately, ahahah..!"

she begins to itch at her neck and pick her skin anxiously with her claws while her eyes frequently dart around, though she doesn't quit baring her razor-toothed grin.

"mentally i'd say i'm a bit.. scrambled, eheheh!! my cravings are the worst they've ever been, i can't stop thinking about ripping things apart, i get antsy when i'm not chewing on something..! paranoid, too! wobblin over nothing... it's just- i can hear everything! "

she lights up at the promise of bodies and quickly nods, forgetting herself and stepping closer with a feral look in her eye. "oh, you've got a deal there!!"

[modishmeliadus]

So, I’ve been in the BMFM fandom for—I don’t know how long cause I’m old as hell. And I want some fan fiction. I want that toe-curling, tear-jerking, feet-kicking, head-screaming, howling at the goddamn moon, fan fiction about my ridiculous mous leather babies. But I have been provided nothing. So I will do it for you. Prepare for an OC x Canon fic that will be so self fulfilling it will feel as embarrassing as your parents catching you watch porn in the living room.

Y’all have been warned.

[destiny-in-the-universe]

oh no- wheeze

should i just make an mlp x rc9gn au and be done with it? seriously the amount of art suddenly showing up on my dash makes me remember how i used to ponify literally everything i got into-

so i might as well join the party!

[half-oz-eddie]

Need to get my shit together. It's important to my mental health that I am constantly writing when I'm struggling. When I can't write, I feel unwell.

SOOOO I've decided to enroll in fan fiction school and make myself a schedule where certain fics are a "class" and that is what I will be working on that day.

There are so many things I want to give equal attention to so I'm going to try this and see what happens.

[kawaiiempoleon]

Honestly fuck it imma just live blog me playing lb6 in fgo (has not played any of the first 6.5 lostbelts or any of the pseudo singularitys)

I just started so all that's really happened is Tristan just fucking appearing then getting lost and like fuck you but also mood

[kazumasougi]

like the work starts and does not stop coming and i have to wake up like 3 hours after i fall sleep but i, stay silly ,

[respectthepetty]

Hi, I'm Respect the Petty, and I love mess.

Bad subtitles and sometimes no subtitles, zany product placements, dodgy plot lines, shoddy audio, amateur acting, crass dialogue, inexplicable pacing - LOVE!

>Insert Hit Bite Love episode 2<

It's not a simple mess. No. It's a strategic hot mess:

There is a stepbrothers plot that won't be introduced until the third episode, when this is only a six-episode show because the team behind this show already knows some people are Judge Judies out there.

There is a plot that involves a sweet kid, Shokun, and his two toxic options, but it's a kink-shame free zone.

Then there is the A+ plot between these two - Burger and King

King is the BEST BOY and Burger is an idiot.

No, really, King has the brain cells in this pair. Burger ate paper and thought he was going to die, and now he is talking to King's mom, who is a nurse, about his poop.

King, with his brain cells, knows what he wants, is always helpful, and cares for his best friend (the sweet kid with the two toxic options in the kink-shame free zone)

He thought (for good reasons) that Burger liked him and decided to embrace it.

But Burger doesn't like him...yet

Like I mentioned - A strategic hot mess. 2/10 would not recommend to people with morals and actual standards.

But for my fellow trash pandas - 8/10 so far. It lost a point for having five parts each week, and another point for attempting to have a murder plot. Give me more of the art student with his paint though, and I'll give back a point.

[notroosterbradshaw]

literally one in a million about to be stupid enough to try and get Taylor Swift tickets. need the power of the tellers to guide me. 

[swisscheesethethird]

[davidrossseville]

“The person who got Miss. Miller a cell phone for Christmas has no idea how difficult they have made our lives.”

“Today I got 20 texts from her letting me know everything she was watching on TV, how hot the temperature in her house is, and everything she ate for breakfast, lunch, and dinner. Now, she’s asking me how to figure out YouTube.”

“I DON’T EVEN KNOW HOW TO WORK YOUTUBE!” 😂

[nazitty56]

I recently got sucked into the TGCF fandom, and now I have a rabid story bunny on the loose in my head.

It's a reverse role fanfic, but the thing is, almosy every time I reverse a role, a name changes.

Hua Cheng and Xie Lian are reversed (of course)

Hua Cheng's name becomes Xu Hong (since he's part of the Xuli royal family. Original, I know). I realized that Xie Lians's official title, Xianle, doesn't fit Xu Hong, so I had to create a name for him: Ying Guan (Flower Crown -- just a rough translation since Chinese characters have more than one translation per character. Keep that in mind for the other names and titles)

Xie Lian becomes Fang Cheng (Beautiful City), though Ghost City's moniker is Hua Cheng (Flower City). Only people who don't know what it is call it Hua Cheng (sometimes locals will call it that to mess with humans). Fang Cheng is also nicknamed HuaHua by the locals (Hua Chengzhu when they're being really mischievous). They call him that (and the city that) because he's always covered in flowers and wraith butterflies, and the city is covered in flowers as well.

I'm still deciding on how they look.

I made Feng Xin, Xie Lian's maternal cousin. Qi Rong is Xu Hong's assistant (becomes Xuan Zhen when he ascends). Mu Qing is Xu Hong's guard (Nan Yang when he ascends).

He Xuan becomes He Sheng and the Water Master (Shui Shi Sheng). His little sister, He Baihe, becomes the Wind Master (Feng Shi Baihe).

Shi Wudu becomes Xuan Shui (mysterious waters), the equivalent of He Xuan.

Nangong Jie (former Ling Wen), was a female general of Xuli and ascends as Ming Guang Jiangjun after the Xuli rebellion -- that still happens, though Xuli doesn't officially falls until a century later.

Pei Ming was a shoemaker in Xuli, and he ascends as Ling Wen.

As you can tell, the three tumors are already a riot.

The hardest part comes in the form of Jun Wu. His original name (in this fic) is Wu Yong, and he never became a god. His wife, Wu Jianlan, did (goddes of forges -- Lin Long ((fine jade dragon)) ). Her new official title became Long Jun (Prosperous Lord) after she crowned herself as Empress.

I like everything I've made so far, but it's going to be a pain in the ass to write because of how the characters are going to change and thus the circumstances are going to change.

The fun part is when I go to post on AO3 and have to figure out the tagging, lmao. The relationship tags are going to make EVERYONE cringe, I can already tell.

If you guys have any ideas, feel free to add to this!

[sapybara]

So I forgot I had a colloquium today so I woke up early to practice and I only have to speak during 10 minutes but I realized I've been rambling for like 30 minutes. Oops.

[lex-the-mockingbird]

Guess what I've decided to do with my disabled time...

My toxic trait is that I believe I might be able to solve Cain's Jawbone.

[thedeadhandofseldon]

H.L. Mencken, the great Baltimorean journalist: "Democracy is the theory that the common people know what they want, and deserve to get it good and hard."