#this interaction pretty much sums up their relationship. to me

[ddenji]

Damn Girl. Something Aint Right With You…

[brunchable]

We Can’t Be Friends || Doctor Strange x F!Reader.

Genre: Angst(?) || Song MV inspired

Pairings: Stephen Strange x F!Reader

Word Count: 5.2K

Quick Summary: Your relationship with Stephen Strange has been strained to the breaking point by his constant absences and mystical duties. Despite Stephen's attempts to mend your fractured bond, you decide to seek a more permanent solution.

A/N: Lisssteeen, this is not proof read lol. I haven't written in a while, I am feeling rusty so please be forgiving hehe. Every nice interactions are most valued <3

Stephen had been gone for a month for the third time, with no word, no warnings. You had spent countless nights worrying, wondering if he was safe, if he would ever return. And now, as the sparkle of the portal opened and caught your attention, Stephen stepped out, looking weary and worn from his latest mission.

You were waiting for him in the living room, feeling a mixture of anger and frustration, yet your expressions show otherwise. You had been rehearsing what you would say, but now that he was here, the words felt heavy on your tongue.

“You're back. Where in the seven hells have you been this time?” You began, your voice firm but calm, you had that motherly tone when a teen returns home from sneaking out.

“Seven hells pretty much sums it up… can we do this later? I just got back,” Stephen chuckled, rubbing his temples, the tone of your voice grating and adding up to his headache, “I’m exhausted.”

“No, I think we should address this, now,” You insisted, pointing to the ground for emphasis.

Stephen sighed, sensing the confrontation he so wanted to avoid. “Alright, I’m listening.”

You took a deep breath, trying to steady yourself. “Stephen, you’ve been gone for a month. No warnings, no pass the message from Wong. . . What is going on?”

“Y/N, you know what my responsibilities are. The world needs me. I can’t just ignore that,” Stephen said defensively.

“A heads up would be nice. Like how you were before. It feels like I’m nothing more than a distraction to you,” You shot back, your eyes narrowing.

Stephen’s expression hardened with irritation. “You knew what you were getting into from the start. My work–my duty is important. Do I need to explain myself every single time?”

“Why are you so defensive? Is it wrong of me to at least know where you are? So I don't worry all the time? At least still show me that I matter to you. Right now, it feels like you and your missions are all that matter,” you replied, rolling your eyes. 

“This is ridiculous, Y/N. Clea and I are working to protect this world. It’s not like I’m off on a vacation. I’m trying to keep everyone safe, including you.”

It was impossible to overlook the single name that slipped from Stephen's lips. The air seemed to thicken even more with tension. Your face transformed dramatically; what had been a mask of frustration quickly crumbled, replaced by a deep, probing suspicion. Your eyes narrowed, searching Stephen's face for any hint of deceit, and your heart pounded in your chest, echoing the name that now hung heavily between you. 

“Who’s Clea?” you asked, making sure to stress the name you didn't want to say, your voice tinged of disdain.

“Fuck,” Stephen muttered under his breath. A wave of regret washed over him as he realized he should have told you who he was teaming up with sooner. He wondered why he had left out such an important detail, knowing it would have made a difference in your reaction. . . or make it worse?

“Clea is from the dark dimension, I have caused an incursion in reality and I had to go with her and fix it, okay?” Stephen explained it for what it is. . . to him at least.

“So, you were with her every time you vanished without a trace?” you replied, your voice dripping with sarcasm and a barely concealed resentment that felt like a knife twist in your chest.

“Like I said, I had to fix the incursion I caused,” he responded, his tone distant, as if the gravity of his words could shield him from the emotional storm brewing between you.

You stared at him, not caring what he even meant by 'incursion'. Your mind was a whirlwind, fixated on the crushing weight of this new revelation, which felt like an earthquake shattering the foundation of everything you thought you knew. 

The man who once made you feel safe and cherished now stood before you, a stranger entwined in secrets and sacrifices you couldn't begin to fathom.

Stephen ran a hand through his hair, clearly exasperated. “I don’t have time for this. If you can’t understand that my work is important, then maybe we do need to rethink this relationship.”

You were stunned into silence for a moment, the weight of his words hitting you like a physical blow. Your throat stings badly as you fight to prevent any tears from falling. “So, that’s it? You’re willing to throw everything away because I worry about you?”

“I’m not throwing anything away, Y/N. All I do is try to save the world. If you can’t see that, then maybe we need to reconsider,” Stephen replied coldly.

“Okay. . .so you find a new partner in crime and the first thing you could think of is to ‘reconsider’,” You nodded, a little laugh might've escaped from you and it triggered something in Stephen.

“Do you hear yourself? You’re acting like I’m choosing Clea over you. This isn’t some petty love triangle, Y/N. This is about life and death, about the safety of the entire world!” Stephen’s voice was now raised.

“Oh my god! Enough about saving the world already! You belong to the world! Alright, I get it! But don't expect me to be nonchalant when you've spent your time ‘saving the world’ with her. Meanwhile I rot in my apartment worried sick if you're even still alive because I only want to belong to you.” Your voice was sharp, cutting through the air, firmly jabbing his chest with your finger

Stephen clenched his fist tightly, the knuckles turning white, as he took a deliberate step closer. His presence loomed over you, casting a shadow that seemed to amplify the tension in the air, “You think it’s easy for me? You think I don’t miss you? I have responsibilities that go beyond us—" 

“If you're thinking I am asking you to abandon your responsibilities, I am not. I didn’t think you’d understand me.” You replied, striving to maintain your composure under his unwavering presence and the intense gaze fixated on your face.

Stephen shook his head, a bitter laugh escaping his lips. “I never hid what my life was about, but you knew what signed up for when you said yes to me.”

“I did but I didn't sign up to be treated like an afterthought,” Y/N said, your voice softening slightly but still firm.

Stephen sighed and was silent for a moment, “So, what then? What do you want me to do? It is so hard to find balance with all this shit happening around us.”

“I don't know. . . whatever I may want, it'll be impossible for you to do,” You said, your voice resigned as you crossed your arms, a gesture of both self-protection and defiance.

Stephen’s eyes narrowed. “And what’s your solution? To just walk away?”

“That was your suggestion first, wasn't it?” You responded, a low, mirthless chuckle escaping your lips. 

Stephen looked down, his silence speaking volumes. The decision crystallized in your mind. You turned away, grabbed your keys from the table, and headed toward the door, needing to cool off and get your head straight. The sound of the door closing behind you echoed through the Sanctum, a final punctuation to your heated exchange.

× × × × ×

You gripped the steering wheel tightly as you drove through the darkened streets of New York City. The familiar hum of the engine and the blur of passing lights did little to calm your racing heart. Your eyes were red from preventing a single tear to shed, but the tears came after being alone, blurring your vision and forcing you to blink them away repeatedly.

Your mind was a whirlwind of emotions—anger, sadness, confusion, and a deep, aching sense of betrayal. The argument with Stephen played on a relentless loop in your head, each word echoing with painful clarity.

"Maybe we do need to rethink this relationship."

"Maybe we shouldn’t be together."

You shook your head, trying to dispel the hurtful words, but they clung to you like a stubborn shadow. How did it come to this? How did your love, once so vibrant and full of promise, deteriorated into something so cold and distant?

Your thoughts drifted to the early days of your relationship. The way Stephen's eyes would light up when he saw you, the warmth of his touch, the way both of you would laugh and talk for hours about everything and nothing. You remembered the adventures you shared, the quiet moments of intimacy, and the feeling of safety and love that enveloped you whenever you were with him.

But those memories felt like they belonged to another life, another couple. Now, Stephen was always preoccupied, always focused on his missions with Clea. You couldn’t shake the feeling of being an afterthought, a secondary priority in his life. The loneliness you felt was suffocating, and tonight’s argument had only confirmed your deepest fears.

You pulled over to a quiet spot by the Hudson River, the soft glow of the city lights reflecting off the water. You turned off the engine and sat there in silence, the sound of your own breathing loud in the stillness of the night. 

You leaned your head back against the seat and closed your eyes, taking a deep, shuddering breath. You felt a crushing weight on your chest, the sense of impending loss almost too much to bear. You loved Stephen with all your heart, but you couldn’t keep living like this—constantly feeling like you were competing for his attention, always coming second to his duties as a sorcerer.

A part of you understood the importance of Stephen's work. You admired his dedication, his unwavering commitment to protecting the world from mystical threats. But at the same time, you couldn’t ignore your own needs, your own desire for a partner who was present, who made you feel valued and loved.

The idea asking Wong to use the Runes of Kof-Kol had come to you in a moment of clarity during your drive. It was a drastic measure, but it felt like the only way to save yourself from the inevitable heartbreak of this deteriorating relationship. If you both forgot each other, if you became strangers once more, maybe then you could find peace.

You opened your eyes and gazed out at the river, the dark waters flowing steadily under the moonlit sky. You felt a strange sense of calm wash over you as you made your decision. It wouldn’t be easy, and it would hurt like hell, but it was the only way you could move forward without the constant pain of their fractured love.

As you started the car and drove back towards the Sanctum, you knew what you had to do, and you hoped that in forgetting, you could both find a way to heal. The city lights blurred once more as fresh tears welled up in your eyes, but this time, they were tears of acceptance. You were ready to let go, ready to find yourself again, even if it meant losing the man you had loved with all your heart.

× × × ×

After driving aimlessly for hours, you finally pull up in front of the Sanctum Sanctorum. The building looms before you, its ancient architecture shrouded in an almost foreboding silence. You sit in the car for a few moments, gathering your strength, knowing the decision you have made is final. The city is quieter now, the hustle and bustle having died down to a gentle hum in the background.

You take a deep breath and step out of the car, your legs feeling like lead. You walk up to the front door and pause for a moment, your hand resting on the cold brass handle. Memories of happier times flash before your eyes—moments of laughter, love, and a bond that once felt unbreakable. But those memories are now overshadowed by the reality of your fractured relationship.

Pushing the door open, you step inside. The familiar scent of incense and ancient books fills your nostrils, but instead of comfort, it brings a pang of sadness. The Sanctum feels emptier than ever, a reflection of the void that has grown between you and Stephen.

As you walk into the living room, you see Stephen sitting on the couch, his head in his hands. He looks up as you enter, his eyes filled with the weariness which mirrors your own.

“Y/N, you're back,” Stephen says softly, standing up. “I was worried about you.”

You nod, your face devoid of emotion. “I needed some time to think.”

Stephen takes a few careful steps, “I know I haven’t been around much. And I know tonight's argument was... I didn’t handle it well. I’m sorry for that.”

You feel a flicker of acknowledgment at his words, you look into his eyes, the eyes you once found so much solace in, and feel a deep sense of finality, “I need to see Wong,” you say, your voice steady and cold, “Is he here?”

Stephen steps closer, his gaze searching your face for any hint of what you might be feeling. “Are you okay now? About earlier. . .”

“I'm fine, Stephen. Really,” you say with a forced smile. “I just need to speak to Wong.”

“Wong? Sure, I'll summon him for you.” Stephen's eyes narrow slightly, sensing something is off. He didn’t think he’d get out of trouble that easily.

A few moments later, Wong enters the room, his expression pondering about what you might need him for. “Y/N, Stephen said you wanted to speak with me. What’s going on?”

You took a deep breath and glanced at Stephen who remained curious about why you needed Wong.

“Are we able to chat somewhere private?” You asked, your eyes flickering towards Stephen which Wong took notice of.

Wong turned his head towards Stephen and then you, “Of course. Follow me.” He headed towards the door to Kamar-Taj. 

He led you to the empty library, ensuring no one else was around, and gestured for you to sit across the table from him.

“How can I help?” He asked.

“I hope this isn't too much to ask. . . but can you please cast the Runes of Kof-Kol on me?” 

Wong's expression shifts to one of alarm. “The Runes of Kof-Kol? Those spells are dangerous, Y/N. What could possibly make you consider using them?”

You explained the situation, trying your best to keep your voice from breaking, “Stephen and I... we’re not working anymore. It’s too painful. I need to forget him. I want to move on quickly. I don't want to spend months wallowing in heartbreak.”

Wong listens quietly, his expression softening with understanding. “I see. But you know the risks, don’t you? The Runes of Kof-Kol only erases memories, not feelings.”

“I know,” you say firmly.

Wong nods slowly, his gaze thoughtful. “I understand your pain, Y/N. But this is a decision that cannot be undone. I urge you to think about it very carefully. Take some time to reflect on whether this is truly what you want.”

You shake your head, your decision unwavering. “I've already thought about it, Wong. I’ve thought about nothing else. This is what needs to be done.”

Wong sighs, his expression resigned yet compassionate. “Still, I urge you to give it a few more days. I suggest you stay here at Kamar-Taj. Meditate, reflect, and if you still feel the same, we will discuss it again.”

You nod slowly, appreciating his concern. “Alright. I’ll stay and think about it.”

× × × × ×

After you left the library, Wong stood silently, his thoughts troubled by your request. He knew the depth of the pain you were feeling, but the Runes of Kof-Kol were not to be taken lightly. As he pondered the situation, he sensed a presence lingering near the bookshelves. Turning his head slightly, he caught sight of Stephen, partially hidden in the shadows, clearly eavesdropping.

“Strange,” Wong called out, his tone firm but not unkind. “You can come out. I know you've been listening.”

Stephen stepped out, a mixture of guilt and concern etched on his face. “I didn't mean to intrude. I just… needed to know what she was thinking.”

Wong crossed his arms, looking at Stephen with a mixture of disappointment and empathy. “You heard what she said. She's feeling hurt. . . more than I think you realize.”

Stephen sighed heavily, running a hand through his hair. “I know. I know I've been neglecting her, but my responsibilities... the missions... They demand so much of me. I never wanted her to feel like this.”

Wong nodded, his expression softening slightly. “Your duties are important, Stephen. But so are your personal relationships. Y/N came to you because she believed in you, trusted you. But right now, she feels like she's lost in your shadow.”

Stephen's eyes glistened with unshed tears, a rare display of vulnerability. “I don't know what to do. I don't want to lose her, but I also can't abandon my duties.”

Wong walked over to Stephen, placing a hand on his shoulder. “The balance between your responsibilities and personal life is delicate, but not impossible to achieve. You need to make her feel valued and prioritize your time better. She asked about the Runes of Kof-Kol, so she's considering erasing her memories of you. Right now, though, she needs space to think.”

Stephen's breath hitched, the gravity of Wong's words hitting him hard. “She wants to forget me completely.”

Wong nodded solemnly. “She believes it's the only way to move on from the pain. I advised her to stay here for a few days, to meditate and reflect before making such a drastic decision.”

“I can't let her do this. I need to talk to her, to make her understand that I can change, that I can be better.” Stephen closed his eyes, the weight of the situation pressing down on him. He was about to walk away to find you but Wong stopped him.

“Right now, she needs time. Barging in and trying to convince her otherwise might only push her further away. Give her the space she asked for. If she decides to go through with it, we'll deal with it then. But for now, respect her wishes.” Wong shook his head gently.

Stephen glanced in your direction with a sigh, shrugged off Wong's hand, and returned to the New York Sanctum. That night, sleep eluded him despite his restless tossing and turning. No position felt comfortable, not when your scent lingered on his pillowcases.

Anxiety ate him up, twisting his stomach into knots as he replayed the argument repeatedly in his mind. Each harsh word and dismissive gesture haunted him, intensifying his regret.

He had always prided himself on his composure and control, but now he felt them slipping away. The weight of his mistakes pressed heavily on his chest, making it difficult to breathe.

“I should have been more understanding, I should have put myself in her shoes,” he thought, his mind consumed by remorse.

The thought of your hurt expression cut him deeply, more than any physical pain he had ever endured. He realized how much he valued your presence, your support, and the warmth you brought into his life. The fear of losing you was a constant ache, gnawing at the edges of his consciousness.

He was ashamed of how he had dismissed your feelings, how he had let his pride overshadow the love and respect he had for you.

Desperation clawed at him as he searched for a way to make things right, to prove that he could be the partner you deserved. In the silence of the night, he vowed to himself that he would do better, that he would learn from his mistakes and show you how much you meant to him. That is if it’s not too late.

× × × × ×

Two days later, the peaceful atmosphere of Kamar-Taj had failed to ease the unrest in your heart. Despite your attempts at meditation and introspection, the serenity of the surroundings could not calm the storm of emotions within you. Your resolve remains the same. You knew what needed to be done, and it was time to inform Wong of your decision.

You found Wong in the courtyard, meticulously tending to a small garden. The scent of blooming flowers mixed with the crisp mountain air, creating a serene environment that contrasted sharply with your inner conflict.

“Wong,” you called softly, approaching him.

Wong looked up from his work, his expression calm but observant. “Y/N, have you made your decision?”

You nodded, taking a deep breath. “I have. I still want to use the Runes of Kof-Kol.”

Wong sighed, setting aside his tools. “I was hoping you might reconsider, but I respect your decision. . .” he trailed off, noticing Stephen walk towards you, “Give me a moment? I'll back.”

As Wong turned to leave, Stephen entered the courtyard with his presence of authority. He had been waiting for this moment, fully aware that your decision was imminent.

With careful, deliberate steps, he approached you. The air was thick with unspoken emotions, and each passing second felt like an eternity as he stood there gathering the right words to say.

“Y/N,” Stephen began, his voice calm but carrying a hint of vulnerability, his eyes intensely scanning your face for any hint of doubt or hesitation. “Is this truly what you want?”

You jumped slightly, startled by his sudden appearance behind you. “Stephen,” you exclaimed, “What are you doing here?”

“I came to—I just wanted to apologize... that it has led to this. I was wrong…” Stephen began, but his voice seemed to fade into the background as you stared at his face intently, trying to memorize every detail.

As Stephen spoke, the reality of the moment hit you hard. You felt an overwhelming need to imprint his features in your memory: the way his brow furrowed with concern, the earnestness in his eyes, and the subtle lines that hinted at the weight he carried.

Time seemed to slow down, and every second stretched into an eternity. You noticed the slight quiver of his lips, the way his hair framed his face, and even the small scar on his cheek that you had always found endearing.

Your heart ached with the knowledge that this might be the last time you saw him like this, so close and vulnerable. Each detail became precious, a fragment of a moment you desperately wanted to hold onto.

The intensity of your emotions made it hard to breathe, and you felt a lump forming in your throat. Even though Stephen's voice was a distant echo, the look in his eyes told you everything—you were both struggling with the same pain, the pain of letting this story die. 

“. . . I love you, Y/N—but if this will save you from the hurt I’ve caused you then so be it. I will cast the spell on you.”

You were taken aback, surprise flickering across your face. “You would do that?”

Stephen stepped closer, his eyes earnest. “Yes. If this is what it takes for you to find peace, then I’ll do it.”

Stephen leads you back in the New York Sanctum, heading towards the ritual chamber in the Undercroft. Each step you took echoed with the weight of what was about to happen. Stephen’s mind was a whirlwind of memories and emotions.

He glanced at you walking beside him, your face a mask of calm determination. Opposite to the storm he knew must be raging inside you. He wished he could reach out, take your hand, and pull you back from the edge of this irreversible decision. But he knew he had no right to, not after everything.

As you descended the final set of steps into the Undercroft, Stephen’s heart ached with regret. He had always prided himself on his ability to solve problems, to find solutions where others saw only obstacles. But here, in this most personal of battles, he had failed. He had failed to protect what mattered most.

Every step felt heavier than the last. Stephen’s mind raced with unspoken words, a torrent of emotions he struggled to contain.

He remembered the early days of your relationship, the way your laughter had filled the Sanctum with warmth, the quiet moments of understanding, and shared dreams. Those memories now felt like shards of glass, cutting into him with each step he took.

He glanced at you again, your determined stride a painful reminder of the distance that had grown between you. He wanted to tell you how much he loved you, how sorry he was for every time he had put his duties before you, for every missed moment, every broken promise. But he knew that words would not change the course you had set for yourself. Actions had spoken louder, and they had driven you to this point.

You reached the entrance to the ritual chamber, Stephen paused, taking a deep breath. The room beyond was prepared, the symbols drawn, the components ready. It was a place of power, of ancient magic, but today it felt like a tomb for the love you had shared.

“Y/N,” Stephen began, his voice soft but heavy with regret. “I want you to know that this isn’t easy for me. I never wanted to hurt you. If I could turn back time and make different choices, I would. But I respect your decision. I hope you find the peace you’re looking for.”

You looked at him with eyes glistening of unshed tears, “Thank you, Stephen. . . I hope you find happiness, I really do.”

With that, you stepped into the center of the circle, and Stephen moved to the edge, his heart pounding in his chest. He began to chant the incantation, his voice strong and unwavering despite the storm of emotions inside him. The symbols around you began to glow, the magic swirling in the air like a tangible presence. You felt a strange sensation, a mix of warmth and cold as the spell took hold.

As Stephen chanted, your mind drifted to the memories you were about to lose. The first time you met flashed vividly in your mind—the way Stephen had looked at you with those piercing blue eyes that seemed to see right through you. You remembered feeling an instant connection, a spark that ignited something deep within you. You had been fascinated by his intellect, his confidence, and the way he carried himself with such purpose.

The mornings you woke up wrapped in each other’s arms, sunlight streaming through the curtains, casting a warm glow on your intertwined bodies. The way he would brush a strand of hair from your face and kiss your forehead, making you feel like the most cherished person in the world. You remembered the laughter, the way his eyes crinkled at the corners when he smiled, the sound of his voice when he whispered sweet nothings into your ear.

As the incantation reached its peak, a bright light enveloped you, and you felt a sudden rush of memories and emotions being pulled away. The love, the pain, the shared moments—all of it faded into a distant, forgotten dream. Your vision blurred, the light intensifying until it was all-consuming.

Then, everything went dark. You felt your knees give way, the world tilting as you lost consciousness. The last thing you heard was Stephen’s voice, calling your name out of concern as you slipped into oblivion.

When you finally stirred, you found yourself lying on the familiar softness of your own bed, the morning light filtering through the curtains. The familiar hum of the city outside your window grounded you, your arms reaching on the other side of the bed and it was empty. You shook it off, chuckling to yourself.

You sat up slowly, looking around your apartment. Everything was in its place—the books on the shelf, the photos on the wall—now mostly of you by yourself, the cozy blanket draped over the armchair. Nothing out of the ordinary and yet you feel disorientated.

You made yourself a cup of tea, the warm liquid offering a small comfort. As you sipped it, you stared out of the window at the bustling city below. The people, the cars, the rhythm of daily life—it all seemed so normal, so unremarkable. Yet, there was an inexplicable void within you, a sadness that lingered just beneath the surface but you try not to dwell on it.

Days turned into weeks, and while the feeling of emptiness persisted, you found ways to move on. You immersed yourself in work, reconnected with old friends, and took up new hobbies. Slowly, you began to carve out a new life for yourself, one that was no longer defined by the shadows of forgotten memories.

× × × × ×

Stephen sat alone in the Sanctum Sanctorum's library, the flickering candlelight casting long shadows on the ancient tomes that lined the walls. The room, once a place of solace and knowledge, now felt suffocatingly empty. He absentmindedly traced the spine of a book he had read countless times, but the words blurred together, unable to hold his attention. His mind was elsewhere, lost in thoughts of you.

He stood up and walked to the window, looking out over the city. The lights twinkled in the distance, a stark contrast to the darkness he felt inside. He remembered how you used to stand there with him, your hand in his, both of you silently watching the world below. Those moments had been a rare reprieve from his responsibilities, a time when he could just be Stephen, not the Master of the New York Sanctum.

The silence of the Sanctum was interrupted only by the distant hum of the city's nightlife, but it felt louder than ever. Every corner of the room seemed to echo with memories of you—the laughter you shared, the quiet conversations late into the night, the way you used to tease him about his incessant need to organize his magical artifacts. Now, those echoes were all he had left, but he guesses that he at least deserved to go through this heartbreak alone.

Wong quietly stood with him, the silence heavy between them. After a moment, he cleared his throat, “Keeping yourself busy?”

Stephen nodded, his response short and clipped. “Yep.”

“She did brighten up the place, didn't she?” Wong glanced around the room, taking in the emptiness that seemed more pronounced now. 

Stephen's eyes followed Wong's gaze, a hint of a sad smile touching his lips. “Yep.”

Wong shifted slightly, turning his head to look at Stephen with curiosity and concern. "So, what's next for you?"

Stephen sighed, his shoulders slumping slightly as he contemplated the question. The thought of waiting was both a comfort and a torment, a reminder of what he had lost and what he still yearned for.

“I don't know... Wait for her, I guess. Wait until our paths cross again, wait until she loves me again.”

TAGS: @goldencherriess @strangeions @sobeautifullyobsessed

[ofswordsandpens]

what do you think could’ve been done better regarding camp half-blood besides spending more time there/pacing? i’d love to hear your thoughts!

!! okay I know you're specifically asking for things that could have been done better beyond spending more time at CHB, but straight up that one issue is really the crux of everything. -- The time we spend at CHB before the quest in the show is half the time we do in the book. (And for a different frame of reference, the book is aprox. 40% over by the time the trio is leaving camp borders.)

And since the show runners halved the pre-quest chb runtime, as a result we lose quite a bit of content that helped to establish context, tone, foreshadowing, character dynamics etc.

Because we have to prioritize Percy and Luke's relationship in the show, it forces the rest of the relationships that were established in CHB in the book into the background, (or simply makes them none existent):

We have pretty much only ever been told verbally about Luke and Annabeth's bond by this point (episode 5). They have a two second interaction at camp that's not particularly noteworthy and that's that. Imo that's not particularly compelling story telling lol. We'll likely (hopefully) get something from episodes 6-8, but I maintain we still should've gotten something more substantial between Luke and Annabeth at camp. I've said before, at bare minimum the show should have had Luke see them off at Thalia's tree like he did in the book.

I've mentioned this before but Annabeth and Percy's dynamic had a much greater establishment in chb in the book because she's the one that's his guide at camp and she actively seeks him out more. In the show, we have to give this role to Luke and while I can give this change between book to screen more leeway because, yes, we have the entire quest to build Percy and Annabeth's dynamic, I still didn't like that it pretty much forced Annabeth into the periphery in the show. As a result, it made her seem a lot more distant and aloof than she ever was in the book. (Shoutout to Leah's armor strap improv, she's doing more for Annabeth than the show runners are).

2. We don't really get see the effects of Percy being claimed as Big Three Kid at camp:

Yeah, Percy moves into the new cabin in the show but then almost immediately after he's off on his quest. Meanwhile in the book, Percy's claimed as a big three kid... and then we see how it ostracizes him.

He misses being in the Hermes' cabin. Campers avoid him. He sleeps and eats alone now. He has to have solo lessons with Luke because the others are scared. He's miserable! And none of those experiences were translated to screen.

Again, they told us that big three kids are taboo, but have not shown that impact.

Like the difference in reaction during the claiming scene between the book and the show pretty much sums up this discrepancy.

3. General loss of foreshadowing and tone:

Because we don't get as much Annabeth, we lose how in the book, she had been aware that something was wrong with the gods and surmised that something was stolen long before the quest. She shared this with Percy. It was a great showcase of her intelligence. It helped set the tone that something was wrong before the quest even stared. And all of it just, didn't really make the cut.

The hellhound attack also didn't make it and its just another loss of foreshadowing. Luke was straight up trying to kill this kid from day one. Percy was not safe even at camp. Things weren't okay ever.

The weather! Yes the boundary keeps the weather mild at camp but in the book Percy remarks on the huge storms that surround them at one point. Before he leaves there's a storm so bad approaching that the campers are nervous. Even before he got to CHB there were "inexplicable" storms all the time. I wish this had been maintained in the show even beyond the camp. The gods, Zeus, they aren't happy.

Also, I tried rewatching the episodes to find this convo but I couldn't so please let me know if it's there somewhere but I don't think Luke conveyed anywhere in the show that his quest "messed things up" for anyone? Like, sure, they could include this at the end, but I think it's more impactful when we see more hints of his bitterness early on.

4. Minor Nitpicks + More things I miss:

Annabeth should have gotten soaked by Percy's Supreme Lord Bathroom moment like she did in the book. Percy had flooded the entire bathroom and she wasn't speared. In fact, Percy was the only person who wasn't wet.

The self-filling goblets in the book + the blue Coke moment.

I wish the show had Percy like, white knuckling his minotaur horn refusing to let it go. In the book he saw it as the last souvenir of his mother, refused to let anyone else hold, and was afraid it would be taken.

Rip Argus :(

[riongeee]

I’m sorry you have sprung me back into my mild interest in Sebek. I’m sorry I have to dump my ideas here

Your recent post has reminded me of how I feel about Sebek and the Dia 3. I might be wrong, because tbh I’m not that good as social situations so if I’m wrong correct me.

So, we know that Dia3 are like a little family, so he’s always somewhat out of place. Like to me, he comes off to Lilia as a “Bauls Grandson/Silvers Friend” and Malleus as “Silvers friend/Guard.” He feels a bit different than how they treat each other.

It’s weird, as he’s, like acknowledged, but not really ever that close to the others like they are to each other.

For Lilia, it feels odd but natural, as it seems like he just really pranks him, but he does, in my opinion, acknowledge him as his own kind of dude, though their relationship isn’t really son father like Silver and Lilia, but he’s still treated (mildly-) like a friend. Like how your friends parents treat you, where they’ll take care of you but you’ll never be as close? It’s a bit weird, because someone (other Sebek Zigvolt blog) mentioned that Lilia might’ve only convinced/was convinced by the fact that Baul is his old friend and Sebek was friends with Silver, and not the fact that Sebek stood out on his own, which would suck for Sebek.

For Malleus, It’s even weirder, but the best I’ll say is it’s like a younger sibling trying to praise the older one that is his idol, even though I’m pretty sure Malleus mainly views Sebek as a guard and Silvers friend, but I can’t make a really big opinion since most interactions are just Sebek praising him. (From what I’ve seen) It just feels like Malleus is close yes, but not really, as he more or less views him as a “younger brothers friend” vibe to me.

Silver is the closest, and to me they’re like brother and younger brother. They’re close, but constantly fight, (it’s one sided lol, Sebek views him as a rival, while Silver is just like “chill.”) and it’s actually kinda sad, because it feels like Sebek tries to be better than him to prove himself, but always loses. (Expect in height. He wins that one.)

On that last point, I think (read somewhere) that he’s a late bloomer, so for some reason, I headcanonned that Sebek is so spiteful, because of Silver always coming before him. Because hear me out, Silver is a human, and Sebek is half, and they lived in a place that despised the both of them. The “shame” he must feel when the human gained his powers and abilities over him while they lived there (I’m pretty sure Silver gained his power when young) because at least Sebek is half fae, and somehow always got beaten by a human. Like imagine how much he got bullied for it over the fact that he’s probably bullied for being mixed. Poor boy.

Anyways thanks for letting me have my thoughts I’ll probably make them all in one blog post later but thanks.

P.S. His own Wiki insults him, I just want to give this guy a hug.

“A livewire who, in his zealous eagerness to be a retainer worthy of the great Malleus, often expends a great deal of energy to accomplish very little.”

Anyways thanks bye

Omg, your ideas? Beautiful. Your brain? Massive.

I swear people don't get how much I like Sebek as a character/just Sebek.

What you said sums up so much of what I think is the issue(not really but kinda) with Diasomnia dynamics.

I just want to add on a few more of my little brain worms to this. Sebek treats him being around Malleus like a job, which I think really inhibits how close he can get with Dia 3. They all see eachother as family and treat eachother accordingly, yet Sebek always mentions how he will be/is Malleus' guard.

I feel like it really sets a boundary that Diasomnia don't really try cross. Which is really interesting because there's something to be said about Sebeks insecurities on being half human and feeling less than as a result. So he subconsciously doesn't let the Dia 3 in.

As for the Dia 3 themselves, what you said pretty much sums up my thoughts too :')

Lillia is distant and only took him in due to Baul and treats him warmly but not 'family warm'.

Malleus is nice enough but as you said distanced due to their positions. Which is probably sad for Sebek to watch Silver despite also being a future guard being treated more warmly. I see Malleus as more of an 'older cousin who hangs out with the older kids instead of you' vibe idk.

Silver is nice. However, he doesn't understand what Sebek is feeling so he can't help really. The comparisons between him and Sebek must also drive a really big wedge in the potential for a closer relationship.

Overall, it leads back to the main issue in which Sebek is treated like an outsider by people who are dear to him. Exacerbated by already feeling like an outsider due to being only half fae.

Lastly, my personal closing thoughts, I really dislike when people boil down Sebeks character to 'loud, shouty dude' and say that's why he's not close to Diasomnia. (Also, the wiki insulting Sebek is actually devastating, Sebek support groups need to rectify this for the poor guy).

[aihoshiino]

it's never going to come up in canon but i do often wonder a lot what the result of ai surviving and raising aqrb as their mother would have done for grsr's 'presence' in their lives and identities, so to speak. obviously both of them have differing and (in aq's case) complicated relationships to the people they were 'before', but how much of that is nature and how much of that is nurture (or lack thereof, i guess.......) is interesting to consider.

ruby pretty clearly straightforwardly thinks of herself as sarina 2.0 at least as of the last real interrogation of this aspect of her identity, but earlier in the series, we actually see her drawing more of a dividing line between the two identities, codeswitching between speaking as 'sarina' and 'ruby' particularly strongly at the start of the sweet today arc. i do think these aspects of her identity make sense in tandem - if she considers herself a continuation of sarina's wishes and dreams, i think it makes sense for them to both overlap and yet be differentiated in the way your past and present selves are at once different and the same.

aqua's r/s with gorou's identity is pretty messy and hard to fully nail down though i think that's in part because aqua himself doesn't know what the fuck to make of it, really. as a baby, we see gorou's personality much more prominently but once we timeskip to the twins' middle school days, the current aqua almost feels like an entirely different character. and in a sense, he is: he's lived a whole life's worth of time so far in a completely different body and brain, having interactions and relationships with people gorou amamiya would never have met in his life and occupying a totally different social role to his past self - i think it makes sense to call the sum of those differences 'aqua hoshino' and differentiate them in the same way as early!ruby does btwn her and sarina: the same, yet different. i do think aqua is intended to be read as separate enough from gorou as to be an individual person, just because a lot of things about him (in particular the aqkn and aqak romances) read Very Differently if he is intended to be an unbroken continuation of gorou's identity as opposed to a 14~18yo boy inheriting it. it's not that aqua concretely Is or Is Not gorou - both of these things are true at once and it's this lack of a yes/no binary and associated failure to compartmentalize as needed that seems to be one of the main causes of his Gorou Related Anguish

but!! all this stuff is infinitely more complicated by the fact that the twins were both traumatized by losing ai in their very early childhood. aqua in particular, as we later find out, was essentially retraumatized because gorou's guilt over his mother's death (+ his grief over sarina's, who he associated w/ai) was already floating around in his brain when all this shit happened. so how much of the current aqua is just the result of his personality naturally developing like that and how much is his brain getting fucking mgs4 microwave corridor brain blasted at a formative age?

then of course there's this smoking gun ass line

what does this mean, aka akasaka. i'm going to laminate you.

i do personally like to think that in an ai lives au, the twins ultimately do fully step into their lives as 'aqua hoshino' and 'ruby hoshino' without feeling beholden to their past selves - not abandoning or forgetting them, but making the most of this second opportunity as new people to purify their regrets and lay them to rest with love. this is mostly because i don't think either of the twins could ever sincerely and wholly accept ai as their mother w/o that compartmentalization and just considering that makes me want to scream cry throw up eat fiberglass blow up a building and smash breakable dishware.

i just want the hoshinos to be alive, together and happy and mentally well....................... is that too much to ask

[twstfanblog]

Brothel AU!

There's an old historical thing about how, when someone wanted to marry a prostitute, they'd have to buy out their contract with the brothel they work at, or wait for it to run out, but due to a mixture of financial abuse and hidden taxations on food and board, typically the former was pretty much always required.

So.

I guess I'm asking as such, exactly HOW expensive are each of the boys in that regard, and whether or not they'd respond well to someone wanting to buy out their contract to marry them? Assuming they knew the person 'buying it out' relatively well.

Like, in no way is this an equal partnership, but nonetheless, it's fun to think about.

[Excluding that time with Vil and that one customer.]

I was actually going to touch on that in a funfacts post I had planned on making! So thank you for asking about it now.

So far I'm not putting concrete numbers on anything since most of the fun for me is just world-building in the form of character interactions and relationships. But the price is basically built on rank. So depending on how popular the Entertainer is the more expensive they are. So as of now, the most expensive Entertainer to buy out of the brothel is Vil.

In terms of how an Entertainer can leave the brothel, there are three ways; four if you count death.

One is to simply run away; doing this will basically forfeit all protection, pay, and employment the brothel offered. If you run from Crewel's brothel you better hope you have somewhere stable to go. I haven't spoken of it yet, but the setting I have this AU is pretty much just a crime city where the only way to live a peaceful life is to live in gang territory. Since the brothel is linked with the Leech family, the biggest and most powerful gang in the city, there are very few areas that would accept a runaway Entertainer from Crewel's brothel.

Two is to accept a marriage proposal. This can go one of two ways. Since Crewel is the 'Madame' of the brothel, he gets the final say. He has accepted marriage proposals for Entertainers who were troublemakers or who caused unneeded drama in the brothel with clients they CLEARLY didn't like. But if you are in his good graces, he will negotiate with the Entertainer on what they actually want to do but the client will still need to make a lump sum payment of the Entertainer's current value if the proposal is accepted. In Vil's case, Crewel would not have accepted the proposal because he is fond of Vil, Vil is an excellent worker, and Vil said NO.

Three...Is getting pregnant. Which is another way that can go multiple ways; your standing with Crewel once again matters. He will either give you the choice to forfeit your last paycheck and simply leave the brothel to raise your child in peace; the client still needs to make the payment, but you're able to still access the benefits the brothel offers. He could tax both the Entertainer and whoever they claimed knocked them up until the child comes of age, OR the client has to pay either a lump sum or make payments as child support until the child comes of age if the Entertainer chooses to raise the child in the brothel. Kinda the safest option as children of Entertainers are treated like lil lords and ladies. Plus they get free education.

So far, Vil is painfully aware Rook seems to have the means to just outright buy him since he just easily throws around the money to book him for a whole day and STILL sends expensive gifts like clockwork.

Azul teasingly asks Jamil at the beginning of their sessions if he'd let him have his hand in holy matrimony. Jamil then hypnotizes him and reads for the next two hours.

Ruggie asks Leona to marry him every night as a joke. (He fucking falls off the fence when Leona says YES one day)

Riddle's path is predestined. Either Floyd gets tired of him or they're getting married. These are his two fates.

As of right now, asking Crewel how much Yuu costs will result in a ban. Crewel costs the amount of the building's yearly profit

[milesandcorysupermacy]

"I know someone who can"

(Part 3)

1610!Miles x Confused-Black-Fem!Reader

Genre: Friends-to-lovers, Fluff, lil bit of angst

Warnings: Cursing, Use of N-word, Google Translated Spanish, That's it I think lemme know if I missed sum 🤷🏾‍♀️

Songs that it's based on: 'Ivy' By Frank Ocean, 'I Wanna Be Yours' By Arctic Monkeys, 'Love Songs' By Kaash Paige

Summary: Jaleel is trippin', Miles is mad, and you gotta fill your bestie in. That's pretty much it!

Prev: "Mami, who's calling you?"

Miles asked with slightly swollen lips. You grabbed your purse and reached inside for your phone, an slightly audible gasp came from your mouth when you saw the Caller ID.

"It's Jaleel."

---------------x-o-x-o---------------------------

Miles seems slightly taken aback by what you just said. His mind had many questions, the main one being why was Jaleel calling you? But, he put all these questions on hold once he saw your face. You were clearly in distress, pacing around the room as the phone made a constant buzz, waiting for someone to interact with the call. He couldn't just let you feel this way, you clearly didn't wanna answer the phone. But, someone had to, right? This obviously wasn't just because Miles wanted to flex being there for you when Jaleel couldn't, no that was not the case at all...

"Gimme the phone, mama."

Miles' calming tone broke you out of your infectious thoughts. You looked over at him and saw the sincerity in his eyes, knowing he was serious. You walked over to your phone hesitantly before grabbing the phone and throwing it to Miles, he caught it with one hand, not even looking due to his spidey-senses. Show off... He was staring you in the eyes the whole time, looking for any sign of discomfort in your eyes. When he saw none, he took the cue to answer the phone, but not before putting Jaleel on speaker.

"Hello?"

"H-hey, why are you on her phone? Where's Y/n at?"

"You don't gotta worry about that no more, lil bro. You fucked up your whole relationship with her, remember?"

"Nigga, that's none of your busine-"

"Nah, it is my business because she's my business. You were acting like an ass and she left you, you never deserved her anyway."

"Hol on, she never left me. What the fuck are you talking about, bro?"

"Well if she didn't, she's leaving you now. Lose her number, bye."

"Let me talk to he-"

*Click*

Miles jumped off his bed and walked over to you, hugging you from behind.

"There you go, now you'll never have to worry about him talking to you again."

You nod, and he kisses your temple.

"Lemme know if he tries to contact you again, I'll venom strike his phone."

This makes you chuckle, which causes Miles to smile. You two just stayed in the warm hug, not wanting to question the relationship yet. You know that you just kissed him, but you still don't know if you and Miles are dating! You felt it was best to just not address it right now since the moment that the two of you were having was so nice. That was until you got a text, the familiar buzz of your phone made you subconsciously reach for it, checking the notification seeing it was your mom.

________________________________________

Mother Dearest 😒💞

It's almost your curfew, did you leave from that lil boy house yet?

9:21 pm

Omw rn. I left his btw, I'm at Miles'.

9:22 pm

Good, I never liked him and his nappy dreads anyway 😒

9:23 pm

😭😭 MOM

9:24 pm. Read.

________________________________________

You clicked your phone off and placed it back into your purse, releasing yourself from the behind hug. You put your purse on and turned to face Miles.

"I gotta go, you wanna walk me home?"

"No, I wanna drive you home. We're in a New York winter right now, I'm not walking around outside when I have a choice not to!"

Miles said, animated. He looked at you like you were crazy and you shook your head, laughing.

"My bad."

You walked over to his doorway and put your shoes on, you began to open Miles' bedroom door but not without him gently removing your hand and placing it on your side. You looked over at him confused, until he opened the door and ushered you out, saying...

"Ladies first."

He smiled at you flirtatiously, before grabbing two jackets hanging on the coat rack. One was a black, north face puffer jacket, and the other was a gray, nike puffer jacket. You furrowed your eyebrows with confusion.

"I didn't bring a jacket."

"I know, but you need one."

He said before handing you the gray, nike puffer jacket. You smiled graciously from the affection that Miles was giving you.

"Thank you."

"Of course, mi preciosa."

(My precious)

You and Miles put on your jackets and he brought his hand down to yours, intertwining your fingers. You felt like a million butterflies were fluttering around in your stomach just from this small gesture. Why does he have this affect on me...? You thought. The jacket smelled just like the cologne Miles always wears. This made you smile a little bit, you felt safe in his essence. Miles led you over to the living room where his parents were sitting.

"Dad, can you give us a ride to Y/n's house?"

Miles asked. His parents turned around on the sofa and took notice of your guys' hands. Rio excitedly shook her husband's shoulders like a girl in middle school, telling her friends a secret. Jeff returned the excitement by turning to his wife, smiling extremely hard. Miles grimaced at his parent's immature actions.

"Guys, please don't make it weird! We just need a ride, please."

Miles said, sighing. Jeff got up excitedly, grabbing his coat.

"Yea, c'mon lovebirds. Let's go."

"Please don't call us that."

Miles said before shutting his front door, making you smile.

"I dunno, I think it has a nice ring to it."

You joked, making Miles groan. You 3 walked down the stairs of Miles' apartment complex. Once the two of you get into the car, Miles offers you an airpod. You excitedly accepted and relaxed to the calm, melodic tones of the song 'Ivy' By Frank Ocean. You two listened to about 5 more songs and you were finally at your house. You handed Miles his airpod and he told you to wait there as he got out of the car, at first you didn't know what he was doing but he came to your side and opened your car door.

"Bye, Mr. Morales!"

"Bye, hun. Don't forget to tell your Mom I said hi!"

Miles grabbed your hand and walked you to the doorstep of your house. You began to take off the jacket he provided until he stopped you with his voice.

"Keep it."

"You sure?"

"Of course I am, mami."

You chuckled a little bit.

"Hey, what's so funny?"

Miles said, playfully shoving you.

"I'm not laughing at you, dumbass. I'm just really happy that you care about me so much, I don't really get this type of treatment from guys a lot. Thanks."

You say, looking up into his eyes. He looked back into yours, noticing the light glare in them from the moonlight behind him. He thought he was gonna pass out from how beautiful your brown skin looked in the moonlight. It provided the most elegant contrasting of colors and light, only something a true artist like himself would notice. He also saw the way your lips were still slightly swollen from the previous makeout session, they also had a moisture to them. He didn't even notice that he was staring for so long until his dad ruined it.

*Beep*

"Will you two stop staring at each other and ring the doorbell? I'm freezing out here."

You two laughed at his dad's tone, Miles let go of your hand to ring your mom's doorbell. He had a sad puppy dog look on his face, already feeling like he was separated from you. He truly didn't want to leave, but he knew he had to once the door swung open to reveal your mom in her bonnet and pajamas.

"Oh, hey Miles. How's school going? You still doing your little art thing?"

Your mother said, trying to engage in small talk with the teenage boy in front of her. Miles smiled before answering enthusiastically.

"School's been alright, I keep my grades up so I can't complain. My art is still going good, I'm still in my AP classes."

"Oh, well that's good. I didn't know Y/n was gonna go to your house, I'm glad she prefers you over that other ugly lil boy. You two would look way better as a couple anyway, I can set you up if you want."

Your mother said as she winked at Miles.

"I'm literally right here."

Your mother chuckled and Miles grabbed your hand, kissing it before saying...

"Goodnight, Y/n."

He then walked away and got into his father's car. He left your mother squealing and giggling like a schoolgirl as you walked in the house. You playfully rolled your eyes, smirking.

"It's not that big of a deal, ma."

"Uh huh, sure. That boy wants to get with you! He's arguably better than Jaleel anyway."

"I agree with that, I broke up with him."

"Oh, so you finally listened to your mother, huh? It's about time. Y/n Morales has a better ring to it than Y/n Barker, Jaleel got a ugly last name."

You chuckled at your Mom's boldness.

"So, I know that's not the jacket you left my house with, is it Miles'?"

"Yes."

Your mom instantly grinned, before walking over to your fridge. Taking out a bottle of water for herself.

"Have fun with your new man."

She said teasingly. You playfully shook your head and began to walk down the hallway to your bedroom, still smiling from the previous events with Miles.

"Mr. Morales said hi, by the way."

You shouted from down the hall. You felt ready to end the day with it being 10 pm. You placed your Miles' jacket onto your coat hook on your bedroom door before closing it.

You walked over to your pajama drawer, pulling out an oversized white tee and some turquoise Perry the Platypus sleep shorts. You put them on and put the clothes you were previously wearing in the hamper. You plopped onto your bed and grapped your phone from your purse that was sitting on your nightstand. You saw a text notification from your best friend, K'Nyah. (Kuh-Ni-Yuh)

--------------------------------------------------

Ny Ny 😝💞

Heyyy, baeeee 🤑

10:01 pm

Heyyyy!

10:02 pm

Im bored, u wanna ft?

10:03 pm

Yeaaaa, I got sum stuff to tell u anyway

10:04 pm. Read.

________________________________________

You open your FaceTime app and click K'Nyah's contact. You open your airpod case and they automatically connect. You place one into your right ear and within 2 rings, K'Nyah answers.

"Hey, girl."

"Hey, so what u gotta tell me? It better be good, there's been a drama drought in 2024."

"You're literally a whole ass mess."

You chuckle.

"Yep, sure am. Now tell me what happened."

"So basically I had got into this little argument with Jaleel."

"Good, never liked his ass anyway. Go on."

"After we argued I was walking home and Miles saw me walking, he took me to his house and was tryna comfort me and then..."

"Then what?"

"We kinda kissed."

"WHAT?!"

"Yea, and it was really great. I feel like he cares about me like nobody else does and he gave me his coat since I didn't have one."

"You're fucking lying, show me right now."

You panned the camera over to your bedroom door with the gray jacket on the hook. You heard K'Nyah gasp.

"Yes, Finally! Bro when I'm telling you the whole ass friend group was waiting for yall to get together...I mean that. Like everybody talks about yall."

"Well that's the problem, I don't exactly know if we're together or not. I mean we kissed and it was like a whole makeout, girl. Plus he was hugging me and shit, and he kissed me goodnight in front of my mom!"

"So, where is this supposed to tell me that yall AREN'T dating?"

"I dunno, we never really established it. He answered a phone call from Jaleel and told him that I was his business but I just don’t know. That could mean anything."

"And you talking about me being a mess..."

"K'Nyah!"

"Ok, ok. My bad. But, you gotta talk to him tomorrow at school. When you do, fill me in after. I literally can't wait to give Jaleel the silent treatment tomorrow because you already know he gon' be asking me why you not talking to him."

She chuckled.

"You're so messy."

You laughed.

"Alright, well ima go to bed. See you tomorrow."

"See you."

*Click*

You sighed, putting your airpod back into it's case and placing your phone onto the charger. You put your bonnet on and grabbed your remote, turning on SpongeBob. You let the cartoon be a quiet lullaby as you laid down, dozing off into sleep. While you were laying down, one question plagued your mind...Are you and Miles dating?

-----------☆--------☆--------☆----------------

Taglist:

@im-miss-simp

@we-loveebony

[seventeenlovesthree]

Character/Headcanon analysis: Koushirou Izumi and his parental tendencies

I like to call Koushirou "parental" when it comes to his 02 self - and I'm aware that may also be a very self-indulgent headcanon of him taking after Kae, even though she is more into soft parenting, whereas he himself is pretty occupied to make sure that his children are not blowing themselves up...

But of course you can also just call that him being a naturally supportive and caring person - always has been, ever since Adventure, even if certain events had to trigger him to not only be theoretically but physically helpful (such as whenever it comes to saving Mimi, Sora and Hikari - or telling Taichi to take it easy for once). The same attitude can also be found in Tentomon - though in his case, it's being protective on one hand and quite literally parental on the other (particularly in Tri).

Koushirou being thoroughly protective is the reason why I like to parallel him to Sora (and Hikari and basically Taichi too and thus Team Light validates me again), because them having self-sacrificial tendencies towards the others has ALWAYS been a thing - to various degrees. Again, Koushirou was ALWAYS taking on responsibility to make sure that others are safe (which is literally 90% of how his interactions with Hikari go, heck, Atlurkabuterimon trying to protect Angewomon is the biggest metaphor for that!). Unfortunately, my art did not become canon, but yes, I still maintain he was cut out of The Beginning (even as support) to give the spotlight to others for once. They still couldn't fully ignore him, hence why the "If Koushirou-san can't figure this out, how are we supposed to?" quote exists - the 02 kids have always relied on him and looked up to him, so it makes perfect sense. And Takeru acknowledged his support in his fanfiction as well! But they naturally didn't want him to get the spotlight, because it was about the 02 kids. 100% valid.

But then you also have the show vs. tell problem. Mimi says Koushirou is ignorant - and a lot of people take that at 100% face value. Taichi even defends him since he is pretty much aware of his quirks - and the scene above pretty much implies that Mimi herself knows how Koushirou is (= getting into hyperfocus mode and becoming ignorant towards everything he doesn't deem important in the process, hence being ignorant in urgent situations, but NOT in general). Stageplay!Kou is in a league of his own anyway, because he was allowed to voice his frustrations with "not being allowed to help by Taichi" again - and because he made everyone question how they really felt (like a good parent would always encourage their children). There are tons of examples, but to sum it all up: He is a connector, he is basically second in command, he is protective. His way of phrasing that may be awkward and not always understandable by others (hence why Yamato needs to explain it to Kae and Taichi to Meiko, IT'S A PATTERN), but...

Again, I just feel like 02 made him incredibly paternal in how he watches over the 02 kids, every time he talks to Iori, Miyako or Ken, he's kind and reassuring - yes, he does scold them and his potential suitors, ahem for being reckless, but also knows when to give praises.

(It also makes sense that he also mainly gets angry whenever he is being left out of things - especially if he knows he could have done something to support.)

We also all know that he has a very loving mother himself and, as mentioned, even if their parenting style might be rather different, he knows what is important, so... How can I not think it's because their relationship got better and he takes after her? Yes, Tri onwards didn't maintain the mom/dadness in him the same way, but he still feels responsible for everybody's safety, he gives advice and guidance all the time and that doesn't change.

[ichinoue]

I just finished watching bleach, and I'm not much of a shipper, as in I didn't care for the ships. But ichihime just didn't make sense to me, I have no problem with renruki but ichihime just didn't do it. So like I'm genuinely curious as to how they stuck out for people like you who absolutely adore it, I've also seen alot of hate towards it so once again I'm curious. Is there any reason that you personally always loved the ship? Be it their chemistry? Or interactions?I don't know I just want to see the appeal

Well, for starters, if you've only watched the anime, I think that can definitely taint your perception of IH because the animators butchered it so much compared to how it actually is in the manga, especially in the early arcs. I made a post on the very first IH moment in the anime vs. the manga here although it's pretty old so the links I used as references are probably broken now. But I definitely recommend reading the manga to get a true sense of what their dynamic is like!

Honestly it's hard to sum up why I love this ship so much without pulling out a bunch of manga pages and turning this into a full blown essay of things I've already said a million times before (but I'll attach a bunch of links to some of those posts below lol).

But I just love the sweetness of IchiHime. The mutual respect. The selfless care and consideration they have for each other. How dorky they are together. The way they make each other better, and stronger. The way Orihime can pull so many passionate, emotional reactions out of Ichigo--the way he softens around her, the blind rage when his enemies use her to taunt him, the way he flies off the handle in a panic when he thinks she's in danger, the depression he fell into when she was gone, the relief he feels when he realizes she's okay. The puppy dog eyes he gives her. The way everyone else kicks him in the head or punches him to lift his spirits, but Orihime--she only has to use gentle words. The vow to protect, the rising up from the dead to keep that vow. Not even death could keep them apart. Orihime wanting to love Ichigo in every lifetime she lives, she would choose him every single time. And yet she never expected him to love her back--he just did. All on his own. He was pining for her, they were pining for each other. It was mutual long before they even knew it.

And I think Kubo did so well writing for the IchiHime relationship. It's got cute, heartfelt moments, angsty teenager moments, silly, comedic relief moments, and dramatic, life-or-death moments. You can see their development from one arc to the next, see the clear-cut changes and growth in their dynamic from beginning to end. They never stopped changing, and growing closer over time. Which created a nice, long slow-burn for me to sink my teeth into over the course of Bleach's 15 year run.

Anyway, here's some links of posts that explain different aspects that I love about this pairing:

I have an extremely long masterpost about IchiHime here, which mostly goes into detail about why I think it was obvious for canon, but it covers almost every single IH moment in detail and my love for the pairing and reasons for shipping it are pretty much woven into the fabric of this post lol.

The chemistry of IchiHime.

My top 3 favorite IchiHime moments.

Masterpost of moments where Ichigo and Orihime protect each other.

IchiHime implications of the lust arc.

Ichigo being teased about Orihime.

Ichigo's vow to protect Orihime.

Ichigo and Orihime's growing feelings for each other.

Orihime consistently being singled out to target Ichigo's heart.

Orihime loving Ichigo's kindness.

Ichigo being receptive to Orihime's feelings.

And these are some posts made by other people that I like:

A post about Ichigo's feelings for Orihime.

This one is an image post that basically combines almost every single IchiHime moment from the first to last chapter, as a visual reference.

A response my friend gave when asked the reasons that they ship IchiHime that I wholeheartedly agree with.

And another list of reasons.

I also just really love this post.

[spiteful-crow]

Ok, but Jon? I can't be the only one who has noticed that he sounds pretty insecure in his diary whenever he is frustrated or generally not happy with the situation. I think it's worth mentioning because I feel it's an aspect of Jon, which rarely gets addressed. So imma address it now with these examples from the diary:

Sherlock knows I hate the time spent tediously scanning papers. I am certain he could do it faster. Is he trying to avoid me?

Sherry was supposed to help with my writing! He doesn't normally ignore me. Does he think I should get a 'real' job?

It only would have taken a couple of minutes to examine that sailor. Why didn't Sherry have a look? Is it because it wasn't his idea?

Recreating that last scene was torture. Sherlock knows I cannot do it by myself! Was he trying to make fun of me?

Did Sherlock even hear what I was saying? He seemed so distracted. None of his suggestions made sense.

Sherry just recalled the day we moved to the manor! The memories are coming back, but I feel unsettled. Am I getting old?

So what was the point telling him about our tree? Now Sherlock doesn't want to remember our childhood adventures? Then why are we here?

His Royal Highness Sherlock Holmes, the Great and Lazy, did not deign to fulfil my humble request. I should know better than to ask.

This is not gonna be some detailed meta, but things like "Is he even listening?", "Is he avoiding me?", "Is he making fun of me?", they make Jon feel so human. Because these are thoughts most of us have, but most of the time, he isn't the kind of a person you'd describe as anxious, at least not if you only focus on his endless enthusiasm and cheerfulness he displays.

Yet even something as small as spending too long in the archives makes him think Sherlock is doing it on purpose to avoid him and... it just makes me think that Jon, being Sherlock's other half, also pretty much carries Sherlock's insecurities as well.

Only, Jon puts it into words. He doesn't mind being vulnerable and speaking about his feelings when they are hurt. I think Sherlock is aware how easily Jon feels insecure about stuff, and he pretty much tries to intervene before such feelings arise. Hence this scene

I have said it so many times, but this scene sums their relationship up so perfectly! It's my favourite interaction of them. Sherlock is aware Jon hates being invisible because it makes him feel like less than real people (remember the Theatre memory and Jon's bitterness about it). But Sherlock can't really help Jon, Jon's nature can't be changed. The only thing Sherlock can do for Jon is to pay attention to him and to let him know that he is appreciated. There is a lot of banter between them and they even have a fight or two, but never does Sherlock imply that Jon is unwelcome or unwanted (until the end, that is, but that's a topic I won't address today💀). It's because Sherlock knows it doesn't take a lot for Jon to start to question his position in Sherlock's life and feel insecure about it. Jon depends on Sherlock's will entirely, and it's a sucky position to be in, and Sherlock acknowledges it and does the only thing he can to make it easier for Jon - he treats him with care and compassion.

[pinkrelish]

I know many people though the romantic relationship aspect in FOI was unnecessary, and whilst I partially agree with that, I also kinda liked it because it was some of the only time in the book we got to see Eddie happy.

As you said this actually a pretty sad book and Eddie spends most if his time in it anxious or angry, so seeing any happy moments weaved in there made me happy too.

so, i'm gonna use this as a jumping point to talk about my take on the paige plot line. this is just my interpretation, and if you read the book differently, then that's your take. our views are shaped by our individual life experiences, and those factors influence the lens which we digest media in the context that it is given. if you don't agree, then that's your experience.

that is to say—

i felt bad for paige for most of it. eddie kinda sucks lol.

i hesitate to even call it romance because that has a certain connotation, and as someone who almost exclusively reads and writes romance, very little about their relationship comes across as romantic to me.

to build context, at the beginning of the book schneiderhan makes a nod* at a popular fanfic trope: girls using eddie because they want to know what it's like to 'get with the freak'. he says he doesn't mind this because "he's not looking to be anyone's boyfriend anyway," and this self-reflection rung true to me.

eddie's initial attraction to paige stems from 1) her being pretty, 2) she treats him like a person and not a "munson," and importantly, 3) she could get him infront of an important record producer.

in his monologues where he's visualizing his future and what he's looking forward to: being a rock hero, hellfire, getting money from his dad's scheme, california... he never names her. in fact, there's several opportunities for him to think about her, but he doesn't. she's a vehicle for two of those dreams, yet he forgets her. i'm a big romantic softy, so there were two times in particular it felt deliberate he didn't mention her when he thought about what he was excited for in the future, and it kind of stung ngl. he describes how happiness washes over him from the way she looks at him, and when they're together (in a sexual context) he remarks in his head about how he wants it to last forever, but it's like once she's off the page, she's gone.

at one point he runs inner commentary about how he never saw a future for himself where he'd do the whole meeting-someone's-parents thing, so he defaults to what he sees in romance movies. he opens the van door for paige and helps her inside. he gets flowers and expensive chocolates for her mom when he's invited over for dinner. but he rarely like... talks to paige about anything that's not related to the record deal, or what she's doing in town lmao. we as an audience barely learn anything about her. and maybe that's because it's the plot line in the book the least, or because the book itself is short, but *shrug*.

they clearly both like each other, that much is clear. he gets nervous around her, it's sweet. but it was equally clear from my interpretation that she likes him more than he likes her, and while they're both using each other (him for the record deal, her to move up in her industry's hierarchy by proving to her boss that she can provide him with a rockstar in the making), their relationship is very shallow and just sex, especially on his part. "not looking to be anybody's boyfriend."

i don't know if all that sums into it being unnecessary because i personally appreciate and pour over any context we're given in how he would treat potential romantic partners, but it did make me feel bad for paige since by the final reveal at the end of the book, it comes across like she invested more into the "relationship" than he did, and his last interaction with her probably felt extra shitty, even if both of them hesitated referring to each other as anything more than a friend or future roommate.

if anyone's not reading the book because they don't want to read about eddie falling in love with another girl, don't worry, it's not that deep for either of them lmao.

/* i don't know if the nod is intentional, but i've also used popular fandom tropes ("reader comes to eddie wanting weed, but is out of money and pays for it with sex") in my own work and thought it was a neat inclusion.

[elliewiltarwyn]

For the character asks - #3 and #4

answered #3 here (but to sum it up shortly, it was definitely appearance first lol) :3 and as for the other...

4. And reverse, which one of the four things did you struggle with the most?

Between name, appearance, personality, and role...almost definitely personality. The other three came so naturally to her: it was so easy to generate a name I was happy with, especially when I realized how easily it could be abbreviated to Ellie; appearance, as I've mentioned, was pretty much instant the moment I opened the character creator; and I've never had difficulty imagining her in the role the MSQ gives her, Warrior of Light, Protagonist Guy - she's basically a taller, buffer, cooler, sexier version of Meteor Survivor to me. :V

But personality has been a lot trickier. I had some basic ideas once I reached the "oh i want to make her an actual character now" stage, like "she starts out a grouchy bitch and chills out over the course of MSQ" but things like her self-confidence, overcoming her burnout and loss of her family, her friendliness, her headstrong passion, her ability to be a massive dork...and especially how she lets herself become emotionally vulnerable enough to actually Get With the Girl(s)... none of that really came together until I started writing it down. and i haven't published a lot of it (barely any of it really lol), but most of the words that came out at first are about her developing relationships with Mia and Lily over time...

So, ironically, I think her personality really came together when I made other OCs for her to bounce off of, not just canon characters. if I RPed at all, she honestly might develop very differently depending on who she interacted with. Would be interesting to explore, honestly... 👀

[its-malarkey]

Watching a playthrough (I have no game money unfortunately) and I fucking love the character interactions in DM2. Like. Daimon reassuring Yashiki over his guilt of not being able to save people - relating to how he's a doctor, and how the moment he looses that reassurance he tries to cut everyone else out of the investigation. And then Hiroo (who I like a lot more than in the first game, guess a couple months of friendship w the mark bearers did her good) and Mashita just go like 'cut the shit Yashiki we're helping you' because it's pretty damn obvious that otherwise he just straight up wouldn't accept help otherwise.

I love this game so much, I love trying to figure out who The Departed is between each upload of the playthrough I'm watching, I love the body horror, the characters, Yashiki's personal torment nexus, I just love this game so much aaaaaa!!!

ALSO!! The way Yashiki's and Mashita's different thought processes come together to make up for eachothers weaknessess make my DAY!!!

Sorry for long anon but I love this game so much!!

I started playing the games in October for spooky season because I just looked up “horror games” on my Switch and it was one of the first ones that popped up. Lucky me, I didn’t have to wait years for the English translation of Death Mark 2, just a few months. You’re absolutely right, the character interactions are just improved from what they were in the first game. It really feels like these guys are actually friends now, and I think that’s lovely. Yashiki is SO good at tormenting himself and thinking everything is his fault, and I love how his friends deal with it. There’s a really great (and a little funny) moment later on sometime in the finale chapter (I can’t remember if it’s after he defeats the Departed or before) where he starts blaming himself for not being able to save enough people and Mashita goes “I’m gonna have to stop you there bud I’m not here to listen to your self-loathing… but anyway it’s really not your fault. You did the best you could” and I think that absolutely sums up Mashita’s character when he’s with Yashiki. He tries to pretend he’s cold and doesn’t care but then almost immediately follows it up with the best kindness he knows to give. Their relationship is so fun to me, and I just have to say there’s definitely a reason people ship them (I’m people).

And don’t apologize! Death Mark brainrot is affecting us all and we need to come together to cope

[expirisims]

Just a random little post! I tried that whole Pinterest makes my Sim challenge because I thought it would be a fun way to change up my method for making sims!

Her name is Grace and she turned out pretty accurate, however, I'm terrible at sculpting so I need to tweak her jaw and chin a little still, she's supposed to have a more square or heart shaped face. Anyway, she will be in my Lowlands playthrough, once I get there so you'll see plenty of her!

Also I got the Unofficial Sims Cookbook for Christmas :) I wish more of the recipes were from the older games as I'm not really familiar with TS4 foods, but I did make some Goopy Carbonara!

Okay, now for some upcoming playthrough business.

The weddings in St. Bernie all happened through SP so I wasn't able to actually play through them and posing all those albums got me excited to actually play through one, so...I hopped back into Redwood Harbor long enough to get Shayne and Cristina hitched! I've made a promise to myself not to go back to that playthrough until I get through the remaining worlds so don't expect to see those any time soon, but I may post the album early (after the rest of Constant Springs). Side note...it was hands down the BUGGIEST wedding I've EVER played through with both Shayne and Cristina teleporting home at some point and guests wetting themselves everywhere and a very disappointing cake cutting as well as the actual Wedding Arch not working for some reason so I finally had to resort to the "private wedding" interaction in front of the arch...In other words, I am NEVER having an actual played through wedding at the Redwood Harbor Resort again! There's simply not enough room the way I have it designed.

Item two in Redwood Harbor. I'm really torn with a certain storyline. I don't like to interfere, however, I've been considering making an extra male sim for the population. You may remember that Harold and Jamie have been in love since the beginning, however, after one night of passion instigated by me, Jamie ultimately decided to stay with Adriana, and they now have two children. Somehow, she never found out even though Kyle, Woodrow and Thomas all knew, and the situation led to so much fighting that Kyle eventually resorted to sleeping on Thomas and Corinna's couch until I got him his own place. Harold moved out last round. Now I have tried to get him together with some of the townies, but he is completely NOT interested in them. My feeling is that Jamie for whatever reason is not wanting to come out publicly, maybe he's waiting until the kids grow up...I don't know. I can't figure him out, but I definitely think Harold only wants Jamie. So, I'm asking for some input...

Should I leave it be and see if Jamie ever decides to leave Adriana and start a relationship with Harold, or should I make another sim and hope that Harold gives him a chance and gives up on waiting for Jamie?

Another heads up, for Quackenbush and Pleasant Isle I will be cycling through two rounds because there are only five households a piece. I also haven't done taxes in either world yet but plan to when I cycle back through them.

Pleasant Isle has proven to be super buggy so I'm hoping that doesn't become an ongoing issue.

Both Northeney and Lowlands have existing populations, but I've started fresh in every other world, so I'm not planning to play the actual population in either world, I want to keep up precedent and also save as many homes as possible for the families that form and grow through my created populations.

That about sums up all the updates I have for now!

[dearestkong]

reflections // starting the summer term 🌷💌

(feel free to skip … just a lot of rambling about changes of mindset, i’ll sum it up later in my new pinned.)

it’s been more than a month since I’ve started this blog, and I’m really really glad that I did. not because my productivity has spiked or my anxiety has diminished or whatever (though there have been positive effects), but because just attempting to start something like this meant that I was no longer willing to suffer and rot in private. i talked about the “hole of dysfunction and self-hatred” in my old introduction: for so long, that hole was my best-kept secret and my greatest shame. being competent and ambitious was an aspect of my personality, and I couldn’t handle the idea that it wasn’t true.

but then…. dearestkong emerged!! and I started being completely transparent. telling strangers about every day of self-destructiveness. it was a good form of accountability, sure, but it was also a means of telling the truth. this blog has been a way for me to say: i’ve been struggling, and it’s not a fluke or a “flop era” or something entirely disconnected from the high achiever i used to be. the girl fighting off inertia and the girl seemingly doing everything with ease are the same person.

🌷☆彡

my posts have been getting more optimistic recently, and that isn’t a fluke, either. lots of things have happened: i’ve realised how many people support and believe in me, i started taking medication for a problem i’ve had for a while (it’s crazy how the world seems so much brighter now?!!?!), i started writing in my diary again. i’m now 27 days clean from a self-destructive behaviour (this blog isn’t about my relationship with that, but in the early days i used to make a note of relapses and just the fact of acknowledging it felt so freeing to me. it wasn’t something to hide anymore, but a fight i was making progress with.)

this seems like a rapid evolution for such a new blog, right?! but in the next six months, i’m going to be applying to university. i’m about to undergo some of the most rapid evolutions of my life.

🌷☆彡

for so long, i’ve had this vague and unspecified dream: “doing the best” “working my hardest” “impressing my teachers”. now my dream has a name and a face and admissions results attached to it and it’s making me so scared that i want to throw up. when i was in the depths of the hole i couldn’t stop seeing my life as a binary. either i get in, or i don’t. and if i don’t, what the hell is the point of living?

38 days later and i feel a little differently. i am someone who has climbed out the hole of inertia and lived. i have done many things and they’ve all turned out fine— great, actually. i have reason to believe that things will go well.

i still have a pretty nasty relationship with myself, lol. it makes me really happy when people on this blog interact and talk, but they’re all so nice and it makes me feel a little fake. in reality i’m standoffish, awkward, and often mean. i coast by on intellectual abilities while slacking off. i’m a judgemental egoist who is sometimes self-destructive. all of that is true—>

but at the same time, i still have this crazy belief that i deserve the best. it’s literally an overflow of egoism ;;;; there’s nobody i’m more in love with than myself. i think of the girl i’ll be in the future with such affection, and i don’t want her to feel ashamed or resentful of me. she deserves to have her hopes fulfilled!! she deserves the brightest, the best that i can give her.

in conclusion: even if i don’t like the person i am at the present, i have to do it anyway. 1 because there’s no other option and 2 because i love the person i’ll be in the future too much to stop.

🌷☆彡

so from now on, the purpose of this blog is changing slightly. it’s no longer “get out of the hole and survive” like it used to be. we’re past that, we’re already surviving.

now, the aim is to “do my best so my future self can live with no regrets”. that’s not very concise but I’ll work on it.

let’s do this! 加油！

[cienie-isengardu]

what do you think of Shang Tsung and Bihan relationship in mortal kombat 1?

Look, I’m absolutely biased when it comes to those two, so I’m always overjoyed to see them interacting & working together even if for the wrong reasons. And I say it despite thinking the biggest plot twist of the game was NOT USING THE GREAT OPPORTUNITY FOR PLOT TWIST in which Bi-Han would play along Shang Tsung to learn the enemy’s secret instead of jumping at the first offer of power. And really, how I can not crack up seeing this frame from Sub-Zero’s ending

when Bi-Han looks like a reluctant introvert bullied by his extrovert co-worker/friend into taking a photo together? 🤣

But putting aside my simple joy at the sight of those two again, my general opinion can be summed as there was not enough Bi-Han and it is a crime he did not join the final battle against darkness versions the way MK1!Shang Tsung & Quan Chi did, so it is hard to talk about the relationship between Sub-Zero and Shang Tsung when they interacted for like… Five? Maybe eight minutes long in overall? Not much and character intros give us only clues about their rocky relationship as half of banters show them more or less on the same side, the other half how little trust Bi-Han has for the sorcerer but then again, intros don't always provide proper context. 

In general, as much as I despite the Lin Kuei plotline (and their strained brotherhood without giving us good moments between Sub-Zero and his brother(s)), I do like how Bi-Han and Shang Tsung share some interesting parallels, especially the one with stranger offering a power, as Shang Tsung repeated thing that happened to him when his disguised alternative self recruited him to his case. Considering how both in previous timelines were often bound to serve their masters (Shao Kahn for Shang Tsung, Grandmaster and Quan Chi/Shinnok/Kronika for Bi-Han), I do admire how those two desire freedom and independence. Both are ambitious but at the same time I feel Bi-Han still keeps some empathy (like toward Mileena and Kitana who lost their mother) and though angry at his brothers, he is not exactly keen on killing them either and generally, he cares for Lin Kuei, as his loyalty is only to the clan while Shang Tsung is much more uncaring and self-focused.

There is a good ground for their partnership to blossom if they would even work together again while both still keep their own ambitions and goals that could also easily collide with each other, depending on future events. I’m for sure waiting for new lore to drop about them, because those two are my main Mortal Kombat favs for decades and hopefully next time there will be some better flashed out relationship between them because MK1, as a restart point, so far provided rather basis than anything else compared to some other relationships. Which again, is the problem of so little screen time those two got together and then Bi-Han was sidelines pretty hard for the rest of game. A crime against humanity if anyone would ask me!