#this house is a fking mess

[mrmeepsmadmind]

Metalhawk: bro stop calling my people NAILS

Starscream: if you tase me im gonna make u my dead wife istg

Wheeljack: why do your optics turn separate directions whenever i mention the word 'plan'.

Ratchet: yeah i have arthritis so idc if i die tbh :/

rodimus: im buying an rv and me and all these strangers (who like me more than u, not that it matters ) (im hot) are gonna * EXPLODES EVERYONE *

wheeljack, in the middle of discussing a very elaborate pain-staking plan:... ... something just exploded & i wasn't the cause 😢...

prowl: WHERE IS YOUR RAGE

needlenose: i sure love my big dumb evil husband. sure hope a disgruntled little popcorn kernel doesn't detonate a bomb in his head

Wheeljack: fuck my life

Starscream: i love lying, so, naturally-- im gonna become a politician.

ironhide: i saw the hat man

the intelligent Bumble (bee):

[annonir]

two hours getting out of the labyrinth chapter (IX) in house of leaves. its getting real you guys

[ursnottrulywatermelon]

POV: Dark!jw breaks into your room every night and claims you.

warnings: 🔞 🔞 🔞 dark!jw, non-con, stalking, toxic theme, mention of pregnancy Minors do not interact, i'll block ya. Notes from me: Enjoy??

Alright now hear me out.

Dark!jw can be such, a, perv. This man is mentally so messed up. One day, he spotted you and couldn't resist following you home. He began to stalk you, observing your daily activities and shadowing your every move. He would watch you, fixating on the smoothness of your skin as you lounged at home in a loose cami top and shorts. Day and night, he continued to observe you, until it was no longer enough to satiate his desires.

John broke into your room effortlessly, his skills as an assassin making it a simple task. He silently approached your bed, his gaze locked onto your innocent sleeping face and the slight parting of your lips. His breath got heavier, unable to resist the urge to feel your soft skin. He began with a gentle and delicate touch on your cheek, his fingers tracing the edge of your eyes, exploring every inch of your face as if he wanted to imprint the sensation onto his very soul. Finally, his hand trailed down to your lips. Sensing the warmth of your breath, he couldn't resist the temptation and gently slide a finger into your mouth, yearning to feel your warmth.You are such a deep sleeper that you have no idea what just happened, and to make matters worse, you are unconsciously sucking the man's finger with your tongue. Oh boy, you have no idea what that means to Dark!jw. He started visiting you regularly after you fell asleep, using a scent that would induce an even deeper sleep. He would kiss you, kiss every inch of your body, the mountains of yours, until they are ripen red and get’s too sensitive and eventually hurts. He would kiss you while finger fking you. You were just too tight, even one finger would make you frown the cute brows of you while you are sleeping. John is patient, he is a man of commitment, he takes his time with you, preparing you for… something even more sweeter. You would wake up feeling tired, unable to recall anything. You noticed that your breasts had become much more sensitive, and you have to change your bra to a softer material as even the slightest touch would cause discomfort.

This man went to extreme measures, even installing hidden cameras throughout your house, from your living room to your bedroom and bathroom… anywhere you can think of. He wants to know everything about you, finding pleasure in watching you while you bathed or changed clothes. The sight of your exposed skin during daily stretching sessions before workouts would arouse him. Sometime, he would take your underwear after a night’s visit. You would occasionally wonder why certain items went missing, but with the busyness of the day, those thoughts quickly slipped your mind.

He made sure your body is ready, ready to be aroused by his breath, his touch, his kiss… ready to take him fully. From that night onward, he would fuck your sleeping, peaceful body every night. You are unconscious, but still let out soft, weak, delicate moans. The sweet melody that pleased his ears.

oh John would do this every single night, he would fill your needy cunt with his thick cum. But he always remember to clean you up before he left. He’d do this weeks, months, and you have no idea. You just constantly feel tired, but you don’t know why, until one day you decide to see a doctor, and she tells you, congratulations, you are four weeks pregnant. You couldn't believe what you heard. "Four weeks pregnant?! How is that even possible?!" The news hit you like a ton of bricks, leaving you in a state of utter shock.  At first, you dismissed your doctor's words as pure insanity, but then after taking a dozen of pregnancy tests yourself, you have to accept it as all the results come back positive. You don’t know what to do, this is insane, that night you cried yourself to sleep. However, you were waken up by a peculiar yet oddly familiar sensation. You struggled to open your eyes, find out John is on top of you, you are fully naked, your hands are tightly tied over your head while his cock buried deep inside of you. John covered your mouth so tightly that you couldn't even let out a single scream. He told you everything while his cock still twisting inside your moist cunt. “Sweetheart, we are going to be a family, you and me, and the baby.”

He pressed his lips on yours while rushing his body onto you even harder, your screams murmured between the lips as John gives himself inside you. Your tears burst out uncontrollably. It felt both incredibly wrong and undeniably too sweet to resist. Your mind was consumed, thoughts dissipating into a haze as you clung tightly to this man, your arms wrapping around him as if he were the only lifeline in a vast sea. “You are mine, Y/N, now and forever.” “I love you.”

[themotherofhorses]

Wait wait wait with just like animals and the fact the series is in her universe, and cause she’s now in the book, would they cast her in the series??? Would she be around to see herself get cast and Aemond just is like, ugly compared to you my love!

I WANNA WATCH THEM WATCH THEMSELVES IN THE SERIES AND AEMOND THE ATTENTION WHORE IS LIKE “I wasn’t like that with you… it was much more romantic!”

LMAO maybe the change occurs overnight, and grrm awakes to find his aemond one-eye suddenly “married” with a mysterious runaway bride and unborn child. he’s scratching his head like ???

and now aemond’s wiki pages need to be updated and tumblr & twitter are going absolute batshit crazy with this new development.

but here’s the thing:

no one actually *knows* who is his bride is. aemond claims to be married now, and f&b mentions her sporadically, but that’s rlly it. no one knows her name, appearance, house, etc (since she vanished before aemond could introduce her to the court). she is essentially …. a ghost story.

diving into more jla lore, maybe (at first) there is a fan theory that aemond created this unknown woman to get out of marrying floris baratheon. but then aemond displays such unhinged brutality and frustration and desire to find his wife and fans are left thinking “oh shit … maybe she does exist.”

afterward, fans push for her to be mentioned in this show but the casting is so fking difficult since her overall appearance/personality/character is undisclosed. it causes a mess on set. scripts now need to be rewritten to hint at HER.

and ofc you got modern!reader giggling at all the drama from her apartment, enjoying reading all the theories and tweets mentioning her. everyone thinks she could be a lannister or stark — when in reality, she’s a college student who needs to submit her hw on canvas by 11:59 pm this upcoming sunday.

[mozki]

today i fking hate living in a share house i want my own space to get my shit done . im a messy person an im learning to be more tidy but i got a lot of hangups and i cannot tidy a serious mess with someone else around . so just please🙏rot

[mira4townie]

What ASMR style would the 4town members do:

Jesse: He'll do a lot of roleplay ASMR since he plays with his kids. He really likes doing doctor appointment and using his artistic side aswell, such as face painting your face. He's speaking softly and that gives the fans the tingles plus swooning because of his gentle handsome voice. I mean, anything the boy says really. If he's ever live and gets a gift, he'll def blow a kiss and thank them.

Robaire: Now this boy will literally change from English to French from time to time, I guarantee it. And the fans just melts instantly. He'll also do it in a soft tone, but his voice is more buttery than Jesse. He would have simple props to play with and most likely would do Personal attention with them. Like for example a brush to brush over your face or a massage. if he's live, he'll def do a smooth but soft run sometimes as he does it all the time around the band.

Aaron T: This boy, right here, would use his bass ability to the test and would rizz the fans up so much, and he enjoys it to the core. In my headcanon, he's half Mexican, so I think he'll throw in a little deep soft mexican just like Robaire. This man uses not just simple props, but also weird/funny ones and this works also. If he gets live, the fans would be wild and he would reply to as many as he can. If he mess up something, he just lightly (and deeply) chuckle which makes the fans die.

Aaron Z: This shy boy would be a mute ASMRer and the fans aren't complaining because they just think that's super cute. Though he'll bring up Random objects around the house, like tapping on his basketball. If he's ever live somewhere, the fans would shower him with compliments and it'll be clear on his face that he's embarrassed but he appreciates it nonetheless.

Taeyoung: This sweet cutie patoot will definitely do makeup and spa ASMRs, as my headcanon is that he frequently do spa day for the boys' looks. He's a whisperer and a sweetheart to the fans. Just like the others that uses another language, he would throw in a little bit of korean words and he does it in the cutest way, like a nickname for the fans. If he goes live, he'll just do the exact same but acting cute and caring towards his fans. When he's done doing makeup or spa on your face, he'll be just as cute as a bunny and compliment how good you look. HE'S SO FKING CUTE, ALRIGHT?

[darkbluekies]

IM BACK!!!

I sent a message a few weeks ago but i think tumblr messed up again.Anyways how are you blue?? And Silas my babygirl as well ofc.

LMAO i think that ask was meant for another blog cuz it kinda reminded of thay really popular show house of the dragon (alot of people are writing of it)so idk maybe.also thank you for those who have requested for silas.My heart is at peace seeing silas posts 😌

my school is so goddamn unfair.We just finished giving the damned exams a week ago and then they're taking it AGAIN in less than two weeks and are getting held during an important time for everyone.I am only hoping they get postpond cuz my maths fking sucks 😭😭 silas give my maths etest instead-(he has to be good at maths right? Otherwise it's over 😤)

First anon

MY LOVE<3

I hope Tumblr hasn't eaten your ask, I can go check if I find it. But I can assure you that there's A LOT of Silas asks haha

That ask was menar for another blog, they sent in "wrong post lol" and I was like "it better be🤨" lmao

You can do it, I promise! You aced one test you can do it again, everything will be alright I promise, take one thing at the time :> one test won't do much, don't worry ... and I'm sorry but Silas wouldn't be able to help you, his brain is filled with popcorn

[scoups4lyfe]

mannnn you remember when we used to look at this suit and think:

" >:)) Hiromi lOOKS sO cooL!!!"

(we being the plural: me, myself, and I lmao)

hahAAAA get fking wREkt

Hiromi was sooo good in the sense that my homie was ALWAYS ready and willing to employ teamwork :'))

co-worker's a demon? Well it is what it is but we gots a job to do~

<333 what a MAN <33

wots that

'we did it' they said lmaooo as if Hiromi didn't just pop in while they were playing sand-castles with the grass to damage tf outta the monster 😂😂🤡🤡

not to mention the gloved rando grabbin the goods while y'all fk around LOL!!!

(already shirtless)

I love this team <333

boys, pls

they're getting away 🤡 🤡

this house is such a fking mess <333

[currentlyprocrastinating]

i have been exiled from my bed by a spider

[manonblaqkbeak]

Complicated

Fking finally lol. I’ve had absolutely no motivation to read or write these last few days, but I finally started this last night and finished it now. Here’s Day 15--a bad day, and part 3 of the mini-series i have going for this month.

Part 1  Part 2

cw: none that i can think of, but if theres anything, pls dont hesitate to let me know!

1.5k words

enjoy!! :)

Aelin had been sitting in her car for the last twenty minutes, staring at the motel door. She had no idea what she was going to say to Sam, but she knew she had to say something.

Something like, “I'm sorry that your biological daughter calls another man daddy and papa.” Maybe Aelin should have put a stop to it once Olive had started calling Rowan that, but hearing Olive say daddy in her tiny voice with a wide smile on her face made Aelin's heart flutter, and the sweet look of joy when Rowan heard her say it made Aelin think that it wouldn't be too bad.

She had got caught up in the fantasy of it all, but it was hard not to be sucked down into. She still loved Rowan and they had been dating seriously for the last six months. They had been friends for five months after she saw him at the nursery, and things had been going so damned well. Rowan and Egan had moved into Aelin's place two months ago—the four bedroom house previously owned by Aelin's parents before they moved into a small home—and she got along fantastically with Egan; he had a bit more of an understanding that Aelin wasn't his biological mother, since Rowan still had the photos of Lyria during the pregnancy, and she was determined to never replace Lyria, but when he called her 'ma' or 'Lin', her face would break into a smile so big she thought that it would be a permanent fixture on her face.

Aelin wasn't stupid, however, she knew that people thought that she and Rowan were moving too fast—namely her parents and Aedion, but when she and Rowan talked about the future, it felt solid, like it wasn't just a fanciful notion, but something real that was only a few steps away from being able to hold in her hands.

She had never been with someone that was so loyal to her, someone that cared for her in the way that Rowan did. That looked past her outer beauty and saw Aelin for who she was, and encouraged her to go for what made her happy.

It wasn't always perfect, they had arguments for time to time, but they worked it out, and that had shocked Aelin at first, that Rowan actually wanted to work together to fix the issue, that he actually communicated instead of just letting the arguments fade away. It wasn't like that at all with Chaol, part of the reason why their relationship crashed and burned.

So she hardly thought twice about what it meant to have Olive call Rowan 'daddy', that to Aelin, she was just building a family and a future, but she was starkly reminded that her boyfriend indeed was not her daughters father when Olive called Rowan 'papa' in the middle of the lunch that Sam was invited to at their place and the silence that had descended between the three adults.

Aelin almost choked on the pizza that she was in the middle of inhaling when Olive said that, her daughter sitting on Rowan's lap because she had been fussy and didn't want to sit in her booster seat. Olive and Egan were blissfully unaware of the awkwardness that was emanating from Aelin, the brown haired boy paying attention only to the TV that was playing his favourite cartoon, and Olive had simply wanted more of Rowan's attention.

Aelin glanced at Sam and found that the look in his eyes was utterly unreadable, which was unusual since Sam was easy to read, but for the first time in the years that Aelin knew him, she had no idea how to decipher his expression.

Rowan had opened his mouth, to say what Aelin wasn't sure, when Sam waved him off, and resumed the conversation revolving around the classic car that Rowan was fixing in his rare free time. So Rowan, knowing that it wasn't the right place to have that conversation, continued where he left off before Olive uttered that word that had never felt wrong before but suddenly left Aelin wanting to sink into the floor.

And when Sam had left after lunch, Aelin had decided that temporarily avoiding the topic was the best move, and after helping Rowan clear the table, Aelin had given Olive a quick bath in order to think about anything else.

All Aelin had been able to think about was what if somehow, by letting Olive calling Rowan her dad, she had doomed her daughter into developing daddy issues, that she would grow up confused on how to feel about her biological father when all her life she had called another man dad.

Aelin banged her head against the steering wheel, wondering how a good, decent day had gone to a complicated mess in a matter of hours.

She stayed there for a while, until she realised that she needed to be the adult she was and left the car, knocking loudly on the white motel door.

The door flew open and Aelin was greeted by Sam, a small smile on his face. “I was wondering how long you were going to sit out there for.” Having no idea what to say to that, Aelin stayed silent and went inside when Sam invited her in.

Aelin worried at her lip, and sat at the tiny table by the TV. She truly had no idea what to say.

Sam sat across from her and took her hands in his. Aelin looked up and found nothing but openness in his warm brown eyes. “I'm not mad, if that's what you're thinking.”

Aelin blinked at him. While Sam wasn't a violent man, she wasn't expecting that. “How?” she managed to get out after a moment. “How could you not be mad? Your daughter is calling another man 'papa'.”

“I'm hardly Olive's father, Aelin, I'm aware that I'm not the most active dad, I've seen her only a handful of times since her birth and she's nearly two. It's clear that Rowan loves her, and that she loves him. I actually saw all four of you earlier today, at the park,” Sam added. “I was feeling nervous, like I always do before I see Olive, so I went to the park to have my breakfast. I heard your laugh and I turned, ready to call out to you, when I saw that you were having a picnic and I realised that you already had a family, that Rowan and Egan are your family, and that Rowan is Olive's father in the way that counts, in the way that matters, and that I'm just an intruder in your lives.”

Gripping his hands, Aelin shook her head. “Sam, you can't think like that, you're not an intruder. You're Olive's biological father, you're important.”

“And I'll always be grateful that I had a hand in creating her, but Aelin, I want you to look inside yourself and tell me truthfully, in ten years time, who do you see by your side, Olive's side? Because I know that it isn't me.” And it wasn't, Aelin didn't to look inside herself to know that. She was already thinking deeply about her future long before Sam's visit.

“I want you to know though,” Aelin said abruptly, “that I didn't deliberately set out to have Olive see Rowan as her father, that I did talk about you from time to time, but I-I don't think that she could make the connection that the voice on the end of the phone belongs to you. But I promise that if see ever asks about you, I'll tell her, I won't hide anything from her.”

“I know that you will,” Sam said, “just maybe tell her in a nice way that she's the result of a broken condom.”

Aelin laughed, feeling light for the first time since this whole thing started. “I will. Although I think I'll have to consult Google for that.”

Sam nodded, because even he knew that there were no books that could help with that conversation. “But if she never asks about me, then don't tell her.”

“Sam—”

“If Olive wants to believe for the rest of her life that Rowan is her biological father, then I'm okay with that. I'd rather her be happy than confused. Because when I heard Olive call Rowan 'papa', it felt right, like it made sense. And I know that's how you feel, too. And I know it makes no sense, but Olive somehow just looks like she's Rowan's daughter, you know? And I don't want to get in the way of that.”

Sam was far too nice for his own good. People as kind as him were hard to find. It was a miracle that in this life that she had met two men like that.

Aelin wiped at her eyes, the tears falling suddenly and fast. “How are you so nice when your father is a piece of shit?”

Sam snorted and handed her a tissue. “Years of therapy.” He took a deep breath, and in his brown eyes, the eyes that she had once fallen for so deeply, Aelin saw acceptance. “There's also something else...I was doing some soul searching before you came over, and I...I know that I'm not on the birth certificate and that I don't really have a say—”

“Sam, of course you have a say. Like I said earlier, you're Olive's biological father. You might not be on the birth certificate, but if you have opinions, then you can share them with me, I won't bite your head off.”

Sam gave her a tiny smile. “And I appreciate that, I do. But what I was going to say is this: if ever in the future Rowan wants to adopt Olive, then you and he have my blessing.”

Aelin stared at him for a long moment, letting the words sink in, and then the tears started again and Aelin's body shook with the force of her sobs. Because if Sam's father wasn't Arobynn, then she would have had the family that Sam was wholeheartedly accepting that she had with Rowan. And that he was willing to stand aside to let Olive have the father that she deserved.

Sam came over to her, hugging her to him as Aelin sobbed into his shoulder, running his hand up and down her back. Aelin had never let herself cry like this in front of him, she never really liked crying like that, but she couldn't help herself and couldn't stop herself for a long while. It was a good ten minutes later when the tears slowly subsided and Sam slowly pulled back, giving her a once over with his kind eyes.

“Are you okay?”

“Yes,” Aelin said, loudly blowing her nose with a handful of tissues. “I just...I wasn't sure what I was expecting to happen here tonight. Never did I think that you would offer something like that, Sam.”

“I would be just like Arobynn if I forced you to be unhappy, and I never want to be like him.”

“You're not,” Aelin said, “you'll never be like him. I hope one day, Sam, you'll be able to have a family of your own.”

Sam kissed her cheek, the gesture sending her back to when they were teenagers. “I hope so, too.”

Aelin stayed for a little while longer, just talking and reminiscing about the old times. And when she went home, she kissed him on the cheek, thanked him again, and told him that he would always have a special place in her heart, because without him, she wouldn't have Olive.

Sam repeated the sentiment, and wished her nothing but happiness with Rowan, and that he was glad she found him.

Aelin was glad she found Rowan, too.

X X X X X X

Aelin walked into her house, and was greeted by two ecstatic children, acting like they hadn't seen her for years. Aelin smiled and gave them their hugs that they desperately wanted. She went over to the kitchen counter where Rowan was preparing dinner—grilled cheese, that she knew very well had veggies hidden within, because Egan acted like vegetables were the world's most evil thing to exist—and kissed him on the cheek. He kissed her temple in response, and Aelin breathed in the homely scent of him.

“How did everything go with Sam?” he asked, moving about the kitchen to start the side salad.

“Great, and there's something very important that I have to tell you.” Rowan raised a silver brow, but Aelin kissed his cheek again and promised to tell him later.

X X X X X X

Aelin was more than ready to climb into bed and fall asleep, but she needed to tell Rowan about her conversation with Sam, so when they got settled and comfortable, Aelin told him what her ex-partner said.

Rowan was stunned for a moment, and she hadn't even told him the best part. “Truthfully, I was mentally preparing myself for Sam to punch me in the face after lunch, but to hear what he said to you, I feel like a fool for ever thinking that he would resort to that.”

“If he was more like his father, he definitely would have. But Sam is the polar opposite of Arobynn, and truly wants nothing more than for people to be happy.” Rowan smiled and took Aelin's hand in his, and Aelin relished in the comforting touch. “And there's something else,” Aelin added, and it was ridiculous, but a tiny part of her was nervous, that told her that Rowan wouldn't want Sam's blessing, that he wouldn't want to legally be Olive's father. “Sam told me that if you ever wanted to adopt Olive, then you have his blessing, because he wants nothing more than for Olive to be loved and cared for, and he sees that you're the one that can help provide her with that.”

Rowan looked at Aelin, and her own eyes watered when she saw that his were filling up. “I would be honoured to do that, Aelin. It would make me the happiest man in the world to have that privilege. And after we're married, we can start the process, and maybe one day, when Egan's a little older and he has a better understanding, you can adopt him too, because I know you like him just as much as I love Olive.”

“I do,” Aelin said, choking up. “That would be—” Aelin stopped, her mind finally catching up with what he just said. “Did you just propose to me?”

Rowan cracked a smile and kissed her. He pulled away just so, their noses touching. “Not yet, I haven't found the right ring.”

Aelin laughed joyfully, even as her tears overflowed. “Just to let you know, I'm not helping you out this time. You'll have to figure it out on your own.”

Rowan kissed her again and again. “Don't worry, I've already got a few choices in mind.”

“Good. Make sure its sparkles.”

“I will,” Rowan said, and took her into his arms.

It wasn't too bad of a day, after all.

[dadswithipads]

Live reacting to static shock episodes

"Ep 9 S2"

Yesss I have heard many Virichie things this episode.

The flag✋😄. Freshmen. So they are 14/15. K good. NO UNIFORMS.

Dont even look like a vending machine. De la hoya. Dam. Him and richie stepping out of the restroom after that mess is giving me Sam and Quinn in the restroom. And she helps him clean Up. The bros are at it again. Awww Virgil always has his arm around Richie.

Buzz buzz buzz. LMAO. "Give me Carmel corn or give me death". Gay gay gay brain foley. Did she run into the fking Wall?? Virgil you are a fking superhero wdym? I love them. Rich is just hiding behind Virgil like a puppy dog. " I need to learn about how the mind works. - V. " in case you ever get one?"- S. Love the siblings. Drugs. They said it. They really are related. Wtf is she doing at his house????

Magic school bus vibes. Dam. Not his bf. The way he grabbed Richie was so cute. 14 year old projecting into the zombies like. They aint listening. That was a Scooby-Doo reference.

Yasss Richie. Class clown. Bro she's in an insane asylum. My dork sons.

[ichirukilover]

I know kubo is shit and everything but ok I feel the "Ichigo is a shiba stuff" was last minute and very poor planning. I mean fr we don't know anything about the shiba and Ichigo was treated very poorly. I swear he had less than 10 scenes in total ? All I remember is Ichigo in the beginning in his house, Ichigo fighting that dude in hc mundo, Ichigo meeting the mustache guy/arriving in ss, Ichigo meeting Rukia, Ichigo going to the soul king palace, Ichigo meeting Ishida, him going to fight mustache guy again (useless) and him bald headed.

I feel like he forced the plot to be about Ichigo in response to people saying he's boring buttttttt he forced it so much that it opened other plot holes from previous arcs. I don't understand how he could mess up his mc arc. Forget complaining about fanservice. I want to complain about Ichigo as a character :(

(he should've kept Byakuya dead. Like that it could've given extra motivation to Ichigo and Rukia. Although I liked Rukia's bankai scene, I can imagine how better it would have been without Byakuya. Just a blood thirsty revenge driven Rukia)

I do think the Shiba thing didn't come out from nowhere, Ichigo and Kaien resemblance was brought up many times in the beginning. It still didn't go any fking where tho. Lit yeah Isshin is a Shiba yeah whatever no one will ever talk about this. Lit Ku*bo WHAT.THE.FuCK. The last arc could lit be called "ichigo's travels" with the way he only goes back and forth from realms. Also I think Mayuri and Kenpachi had more fights? Or were longer? Than Ichigo, the freaking protagonist.

I'm one of the people that never thought Byakuya would die, like ever, Rukia losing someone she loves again??? Please no. Not to mention Ukitake too dies later, she lit would lose everyone dear to her. I agree tho that it would've been better if his moment with Rukia could've happend like it did but without the part of him interfering during the fight.

[reversecreek]

snickers feverishly at myself for bringing in a 5th... who do i think i am? unstoppable? invincible? suddenly ripples my titanium plated pecs. maybe so. u can find her pinterest here n her playlist here. 

* margaret qualley, cis female + she/her  | you know bradley milligan, right? they’re twenty-four, and they’ve lived in irving for, like, all of their life? well, their spotify wrapped says they listened to looking for knives by dyan like, a million times this year, which makes sense ‘cause they’ve got that whole snow angels trampled through by your father’s footprints, casually reading a newspaper that’s catching flame & stubbing a cigarette against the wing mirror of a parked cop car thing going on. i just checked and their birthday is november 11th, so they’re a scorpio, which is unsurprising, all things considered. ( nai, 24, gmt she/her  )

HISTORY:

bradley has this memory of meeting her grandmother for the first time n everything in the room was frozen still. even the air. she didn’t feel like she cld move n she got the impression this is how it’d always been in the milligan lineage. the only thing that was allowed to act of it’s own accord was her grandmother’s eyes as she tracked every slightest flinch of muscle. when her father left the room her grandmother reached out and took bradley’s hand n bradley looked at this like it was smthn she’d never seen before until her grandmother leaned close and all she could stare at was a nicotine stain on one of her front teeth. “he’s cold, isn’t he? he’s always been cold. i don’t think he’s mine.” bradley could tell from how tight she held her hand that he was. she could tell by the way she smiled as she said it, too. the way she felt obliged to smile back.

growing up in a huge white house in aquila drive w pruned hedges sounds idyllic n looks it too. swanky cars w tinted windows in the long driveway. always men filing in and out under the cloak of night wearing expensive suits n smiles worthy of a politician’s billboard. bradley’s mum alyssa thought so too n that’s hw she got into this whole mess tbh. tony milligan is very good at advertising. he cld package a jarred human heart as strawberry jam and convince u to spread it on ur toast if he wanted to. he could make u smile politely as u ate ur own. 

alyssa ws this very pretty blonde kind of mysterious presence in a room. everyone wanted to kno her story or fk her but noone rly treated her like a person more just like a puzzle to solve. john green syndrome alert..... literally manic pixie dream girled bt on turbo charge. there were vague whispers she’d run away from home when she appeared in town out of nowhere bt nothing concrete. tony decided he wanted to crack the case n once he set his mind to something there was no changing it. they wound up embroiled in a whirlwind romance. head over heels. he came at romance hard and fast as a freight train. alyssa knew he was into shady things but not quite the full extent of it n honestly she didn’t care bc she wanted security n a family to call her own n tony promised that. they were married within a year. 

tony came frm money bt he wanted to carve his own path n make his own legacy. destined fr greatness he’d tell her. we’re destined for greatness. it sounds nice doesn’t it! alyssa thought so too.

(drugs mention tw) slowly over the yrs he essentially forged his own crime organisation tht only grew. he opened a strip club down the seedier side of irving called ‘no angels’ n this became the front thru which his gang ran drugs in the back (predominantly coke n they pride themselves fr having a Superior Blend apparently) as well as laundering cash n this also was kind of their home base to hang

(abuse tw) their marriage increasingly lost it’s shine n alyssa came to realise she’d been sold a lie n she didn’t rly know this person or what he was capable of right around the time bradley was born. by then it was kind of like Wow i am rly in this n there is not an exit door huh. i won’t go into details bt things were not good at all. bradley witnessed n experienced a lot of things she shouldn’t have growing up. she didn’t understand why other kids drew home in all these different coloured crayons like they were bright places to be. she didn’t understand why everyone got so excited when the bell rang at the end of the day bc she just felt sick. she rationalised tht this was normal when she was younger bc sometimes kids talked abt the monsters under their beds giving them nightmares n she thought mayb they were talking abt their dads too. as she got older she realised tht actually her world wasn’t the same as anyone else’s n she also realised no-one wld ever be able to tell her why. she started becoming friends with the angry feeling in her chest tht she used to try and swallow around this time. often she’d wander the mall for a while to put off going home. smoke on random park benches. watch trains rattle thru town from the vantage point of a random rooftop. 

(abuse, missing person implied, murder implied & grief tw) when bradley was 12 she woke up and all of her mum’s clothes were gone frm their drawers. no shoes anywhere. a framed photo of them at the beach holding bradley as a baby vanished from over the mantelpiece. when bradley asked her dad what was going on, tony essentially said “it was exhausting her. being here. being your mother. she didn’t want to do it any more, so now she’s gone” n then he hugged her. little details leaked into the mix over the yrs. at one point tony dismissed her as having flown overseas to a foreign country to drink in the sun like she’d always wanted even tho alyssa always told bradley she liked the snow best (once she even walked outside as it fell in a thin lace nightgown when tony was out n when bradley said “mom you’re gonna get cold” she only tugged her down and made her do snow angels until her lips looked blue). the most significant memory bradley can never shake from her head is her mother cupping a yellow tulip at the park n saying she hated them. when bradley asked why she only turned and smiled at her as she stroked the hair from her face n then said “because they look so happy”. after bradley’s mum vanished a long flower bed at the bottom of the garden was suddenly overrun with dozens of freshly planted yellow tulips. whenever bradley looked at them out of her window she got this sickly feeling in the pit of her stomach like she was visiting a cemetery. she suspected what had happened to her mum (especially as rumours circulated within tony’s organisation abt alyssa being unfaithful with someone tht used to work fr him) bt she cld never bring herself to truly accept it. thus she ws stuck in this strange purgatory state of not-quite-anger at her mum for “leaving” and not-quite-grief.

bradley rly started to transgress in school after her mum was gone. alyssa was always kind of a character when she’d pick bradley up (wasn’t doing well n acted kind of ‘eccentric’ i suppose u cld say) so tony managed to spin it all as a child acting out in the wake of an unfit mother uprooting n abandoning. bradley became........ interesting. JKHGFSSKJGHFSGHSKFGHFG. she’d snap n resort to violence very easily. very desensitised to it. students were kind of scared of her tbh. as this progressed into proper high school she got in w the more rowdy popular crowd solely bc she was so fking.... wild for lack of a better word. rly would just do anything fr the thrill. had no sense of ‘i shouldn’t do this bc it’s dangerous’. partied harder than anyone. bit back harder than anyone. no filter. hung w a lot of guys honestly bc they had less morals n either found her scariness cool or wanted to fk <3

(hospitalisation, depression & drugs tw) she’s had. a few stints in psychiatric institutions fr various reasons tbh. missed a small chunk of her senior yr fr this but it wasn’t widely known just kind of rumoured. she showcases a lot of similar symptoms to her mum who struggled w severe depression (which was difficult to cope w when ur husband was often pouring ur prescription down the drain fr kicks) n in order to compensate fr the lows she takes a lot of things to kick them into highs. drinks n snorts too much. bradley i love u bt i’m begging u to seek healthier coping mechanisms......

as the yrs went on (especially once alyssa had gone) tony rly started trying to integrate bradley into the business side of things...... she literally. is named bradley bc he was expecting a boy n he was like well let’s still call her bradley. n had in mind she’d still fulfil the role he wanted her to of being his little protege so to speak.... both sexist n ugly all in one fell swoop...... an example of this is he literally. bought her a mint green switchblade for her 14th birthday n named it tinkerbell bc it would “die without attention” aka using it. tht sounds like a healthy gift to give a child tony congratulations sis <3

in an ideal world bradley wld have gone to uni to study psychology bc she jst wants to know how the fk her dad is literally like that bt she probably stuck around n is now managing no angels along with billy n marco (billy’s in her dad’s gang n is, u guessed it, a cunt, n marco is his sort of right hand man so to speak) bc tony’s in the closest neighbouring city overseeing a second ‘no angels’ opening up there to expand into a franchise n widen their income margins. bradley wld also be sort of used as a honey trap type deal once she got older if they needed to lure ppl places n sometimes still is bt it depends. the guys in the club all know not to mess w bradley bc she’s tony’s daughter n literally kind of scary herself sometimes bt there’s also this certain allure tht comes with being the boss’ daughter n it kind of comes across in how they act or talk abt her. yes i will kill them all n no i won’t feel bad abt it <3

think that’s kind of all u need to kno history wise... blinks one eye out of sync w the other..... runs to personality

PERSONALITY:

a phrase i wld always use to describe bradley in old intros is “like a cup of black coffee with one grain of sugar that u don’t taste until the last sip”. also dark chocolate. lime. liquorice. she’s an acquired taste n i feel like u either love her or u hate her. 

cannot express how unpredictably chaotic she is..... frequently throws a drink in a stranger’s face jst to start something bc she’s bored. loves to hurl cheese slices across the room so they slap onto someone’s face out of nowhere. likes smashing things. stubbing cigarettes out on faces in framed family photographs. will literally pick a lock n then smash the window besides it to defeat the whole purpose just bc she found how neat it was boring. does anything fr the adrenaline n thrill. gets into far too many fights n fights dirty. probably been thrown out of every bar in town at least three times. banned from a bunch too.

she’s witty bt she has a dark sense of humour..... can be quite mean.......... loves to roast ppl for no reason........ honestly has some nathan young frm misfits aspects in that sense like jst seems untouchable emotionally n like she doesn’t take anything seriously n is fking outrageous about it.....

has this quality abt her tht kind of scares herself sometimes. it’s like she recognises parts of her dad in her. she’s very perceptive (bc she’s had to be over the yrs trying to read every micro-expression of her dad’s to predict what’s next) n like emotionally intelligent in a way which is ironic bc her own emotions r just an absolute minefield.... bt. she can read people quite well. gets this eerily calm look abt her sometimes n it’s jst like god what’s. she thinking. what’s she’s gna do. i’m shaking. a cool n controlled kind of rage can often be scarier than the explosive type n bradley does that well. grits my teeth n tugs on my collar....

very strong on the surface. hates being vulnerable. has this ingrained idea that crying is childish or rly any kind of emotional display within herself. 50% not taking things seriously 50% angry. tht’s how she comes across....... internally? whole different story. bt ppl don’t see that.

very cavalier abt some things. will flash her tits n not even think abt it. jst very out there...... one of her closest friends is a homeless man named joe who wears neon purple fishnets on his head n loves to spit on ppl from over an underpass. finds eccentric ppl like this funny n surrounds herself w them. loves to be kept on her toes.

LOVES driving stolen cars down the wrong side of the highway. it’s a lot.

fiercely loyal to a fault to a select few bt if u wrong her personally this can switch pretty quick. quite a force to b reckoned w n will hold a grudge. bt like. if ur a Chosen One she’d bury a body for u no questions asked. 

WANTED CONNECTIONS

deals to u: bradley isn’t like full time into dealing bt she does do it sometimes.... treats it kind of like a hobby bc the lesser ranked can do tht shit as far as she’s concerned bt.. sometimes also jst gets bored n is like. why not. might be chaotic. mayb they’ll try to rob me <3 we love the thrill <3 or like..... if ur friends w her she’ll deal to u n no she will not do a friends discount <3 or if she does there will definitely be some sort of stipulation attached <3

high skl crew: if ur muse is local n ws an absolutely demonic hell spawn in high skl tht went to 1974547254 parties n was outrageously chaotic n rude then. bradley probably was friends w them <3 her friendships tend to be surface level bt they’d definitely go out a bunch bt whether they actually knew a lot abt her life is debatable bt we could explore options fr this

people who work at no angels: no angels is her dad’s strip club in irving that she kind of helps to run now. it’s kind of a shifty environment. the place where ud have an outrageous bachelor party. u go for the first time w a fake id n u get served bt u also get ur wallet stolen n ur convinced someone spat in ur drink n u also kind of think there might b a hit on u now after u made eye contact too long w a broad shouldered man smoking in a back booth. scary environment. testament to her dad as a person. maybe ur muse is a dancer there or works the bar or security or whatever u name it....

ma’am are u ok?: ur muse found bradley passed out across two bus seats one time in smudged dark eyeliner a silver slip dress n the world’s chunkiest combat boots this town hs ever seen. sometimes she winds up in spots like this when she goes too hard n it’s absolutely dangerous n reckless bt that’s jst bradley <3 mayb they forged an unlikely friendship frm this strange meeting or maybe even? dare i say it? a romance? opposite worlds colliding? good influence? let’s go crazy. release ur inhibitions. feel the rain on ur skin.

hook-ups: bradley’s cavalier abt this stuff..... very unemotional typically..... mayb we cld do an unrequited thing that wld be angsty n fun altho i won’t lie i don’t kno if she’d be the one to catch the feelings.... she rarely sleeps over bt once when she woke up in someone’s bed she hiked over to straddle them carefully as possible so they wldn’t wake up n then pressed her knife to their neck as a fun little surprise where she said boo when they opened their eyes.... she’s a lot clearly.

watermelon slugger, hiiii: bradley has this habit where she gets a bunch of watermelons n then goes to a rooftop n throws them over the edge to watch them explode when they hit the pavement.... maybe ur muse almost got hit by one once n were like WTF???????? another quirky meet cute moment like the bus one <3 can’t stop w them <3 maybe she randomly invited ur muse to do it w her when they were like. a stranger of f the street. she was bored. decided to adopt them as a science experiment. we cn elaborate on this probably....

ouch charlie: similar territory bt she also sometimes shoots pedestrians w a bb gun from rooftops. mayb ur muse wld always get hit by one on a certain route they walked n finally one day they saw her head ducking down behind a ledge n then they see her in the street one day n are like HEY IT’S YOU............. WTF? n bradley’s like ya i’m christ risen again it’s a lot to take in i know...

rly jst anything... mutually destructive friends... exes.... in one rp a character tried to get close to bradley so he cld write an expose all book about her n her family which i found so fking funny so i’ll request that again.... people she’s fought.... ppl whose gf/bf she’s fk’d n it’s caused enemy status.... someone whose place she broke into and shaved their eyebrows off in the night only to draw them on again in crudely thin permanent sharpie lines.... roommates cld be fun n sexy i’d love that actually.... jst anything rly. go wild. kisses everyone tenderly on cheeks.

[scoups4lyfe]

w oo o. awh… Mama-san’s famous saying......

ლ(´﹏`ლ)

That's how you get’em boys

(Sidenote but DAMN that bath must be fking NIRVANA for my homeboy over here.)

Like….did ….they just not let him shower? Has he been dirty for ????? (Months??? days???? hELLO???) Gotta be at least the THIRD most inhuman thing those monsters have done

A bath AND a Home-cooked meal? Hah I’d never leave 👻.

….Yukimi’s sUCH a

s i m p

She seen this dirty-a$$ mess of a man buried in rubble, took him home, made sure he got a nice bath, and nOW THIS???

I kno I said she’s treating him like some abandoned stray kitten she found wet and pathetic in a mud puddle but DAMN

At this rate she’s gonna fking become the FOUNDER of the Pathetic Men Lovers Club

GIRL YOU COOKED IT 😱

(WHY DOES SHE NEED TO ASK THIS OH MY gAT)

I mean, full respect asking for his consent before eating with him bUT LOL

Capital K

Kween 👑 behavior

I imagine that Junie’s over here tho like : ?????

😶

oHH

Y O U CH

….I KNEW he was gonna ask this.

Same my brother in Christ;

she can’t look all happy and warm in her family home and family bath house and then not say where her family is. That’s like toasting bread and then not buttering it.

[beyondthewoodlands]

ravenclaw: (sees post about house being the least popular)

hufflepuff: DONT LISTEN TO THEM YALL R THE BEST

ravenclaw: (pussy sobs)

hufflepuff: ITS OKAY (frantically hands cocoa and blanket) here u go

ravenclaw: (sips frantically)

gryffindor: (in the hallway) YEEEEEEEEE

hufflepuff: dont burn ur tongue--

ravenclaw: AH

hufflepuff: hERE ICE

ravenclaw: adjJKDHFDSL

hufflepuff: hERE ICE

ravenclaw: COLD COLD COLD

hufflepuff: uH UM WATER?

slytherin: (in the hallways) SHUTUPPPP

ravenclaw: y-yes

hufflepuff: oh ok (hands cup of water)

ravenclaw: (sips again)

slythering: what a show

gryffindor: (trying to break the windows)

hufflepuff & ravenclaw: (sits and questions everything)

slytherin: (pulls back gryffindor)

slytherin: (tries to break windows too)

hufflepuff: (tries to stop)

ravenclaw: (just sobbing the corner)

hufflepuff: (doesn't know who to help first)

ravenclaw: (helplessly throws cocoa, but accidentally breaks window)

hufflepuff: :O

ravenclaw: :O

gryffindor: (chants)

slytherin: (fragile ego broken)

ravenclaw: (continues sobbing even harder)

hufflepuff: ohmygod what a mess

gryffindor: goes and does sth stupid

slytherin: (begins sobbing)

hufflepuff: what the fuck

ravenclaw & slytherin: (starts crying even more)

hufflepuff: (also prepares ton of cocoa and blankets)

gryffindor: oh my god (cries along to get the cocoa)

hufflepuff: (can't believe gryffindor but still gives cocoa)

gryffindor: heheheh

hufflepuff: oml

hufflepuff: sly i thot u werent emotional

slytherin: (violently sobs) IM NOT CRYING

hufflepuff: I SEE U HIDDEN IN THE TEARS

slytherin: (sniffles) NO

hufflepuff: YES

slytherin: NO! (accidentally elbows ravenclaw face)

ravenclaw: (intense crying)

hufflepuff: ohmygodareyouokayhere'ssomeice

gryffindor: (already fking asleep)

ravenclaw: y-yes

all 3 houses: (stares at gryffindor) that idiot

slytherin: HANG THEM

ravenclaw: (joins sly)

hufflepuff: (question their sanity)

hufflepuff: (inhales herbs to calm down)

also hufflepuff: (gets high)

ravenclaw: (accidentally gets high too)

gryff: (joins in)

slytherin: I THOUGHT U WERE ASLEEP

ravenclaw & hufflepuff: (gets high together)

[wasithard]

@percyjacksonfan3 tagged me in a game!!!!!!!! i’m a hoe for answering questions about myself thank you <3

Rules: Answer 17 Questions & tag 17 people you want to get to know better (not sure if I can think of 17 but I’ll do my best).

Nickname: T is the most common one!

Zodiac Sign: Scorpio...rawr xD

Height: I honestly have no clue, 165cm? Maybe? I’m shorter than all of my male cousins, younger and older. 

Hogwarts house: Ok look Pottermore told me Gryffindor but I really think I’m a Ravenclaw

Last thing I googled: how to spell ukulele bc I was playing scribbl.io with my cousins and could not get that damn word to save my life

Song stuck in my head: NUTBUSH CITY LIMITS ‘cause i just watched this fantastic tiktok about how the nutbush dance is all the evidence you need of australian culture

Following and followers: I am following 2,395 blogs jfc. The number of followers I have is completely disproportionate to the shitposting mess that is my blog but I am very grateful nonetheless <3

Amount I sleep: Um it really changes every night. I don’t go to bed before 11pm, lately it’s been closer to 1am. I wake up between 7-9am? You do the math.

Lucky number(s): 8, because Percy Jackson was born in August, the eighth month, and he owns my heart.

Dream job: If I could do ANYTHING at all, in my wildest dreams, I’d be a musical theatre actress...playing Angelica Schuyler or Gabriella Montez.

Wearing: Big jumper, stretchy jeans, cropped top underneath

Favourite song(s): I’m really bopping to 5SOS’ new album atm!!! Red Desert and Wildflower are fking jams. 

Random fact: I just learnt how to play You’re So Vain by Carly Simon on piano and I’m sure my neighbours hate me for just playing that one song over and over but damn if it’s not a jam.

Favourite Authors: Melina Marchetta owns my heart soul and mind. Elizabeth Wein’s books bring up emotions I didn’t even know I had. I’ll forever be indebted to Rick Riordan for Percy Jackson but his other books...?

Favourite Animal Noises: the little squeak that dogs make when they yawn...or at least the squeak my dogs make when they yawn?

Aesthetic: strawberry lipstick state of mind 

Thank you!!! @gabriellabolton @pacelikeaghosts @stargirlkiller @agent-teacup @jigglypuffremix @chaserpercy you’re up!