#this has been waiting in my inbox just like some kind of cheese I know but

[thekenobee]

oh the uskerty post reminded me! the whole bit where arthur tries to talk like a guy in a bar. there is that scene in the plymouth express episode where hastings talks to the suspect at the bar and the two are so similar to me, almost like arthur based his concept of a bar conversation on that scene

Ask and it SHALL BE GIVEN

[ejzah]

In Miss Blye’s Class, Part 34

***

A full week and a half had passed since Deeks last spoke with Monica. In that time, Deeks and Caleb were too busy to really dwell on whether or not she’d appear. There were multiple end of year events a week to prepare for, and which Deeks did his best to attend. He and Kensi also tried to sneak in a few lunches or dinners together as time would allow.

On Saturday, they were miraculously caught up on all Caleb’s extra projects and he had his work inbox mostly cleared out—what was left could wait a couple days. It was also the perfect weather for surfing.

Before Caleb woke up, Deeks packed a couple of bags with towels, their wetsuits, sunscreen, and snacks. It was certainly a lot more than he’d ever brought with when he was a kid and would walk out the door with little more than his board. He also texted Kensi, inviting her to join them. She responded a few minutes later with a “yes” and offers to bring sandwiches.

Then he started making a simple breakfast of eggs—scrambled with cheese for Caleb—and toast.

Caleb wandered in a little after 9, still in his pajamas, his hair puffed out in frizzy curls, rubbing one eye. He sat down at the kitchen table without speaking, and started eating his eggs.

“You still a little tired, kiddo?”

Caleb grumbled unintelligibly, shoveling a forkful of eggs into his mouth.

“Huh, well maybe this will perk you up. I was thinking we could go to the beach today,” Deeks said.

Caleb immediately straightened up with wide eyes.

“Really? When can we leave?”

“As soon as you finish breakfast and change.”

Caleb scarfed down the rest of his food, his cheeks full as he struggled to swallow. “Done,” he announced.

Chuckling, Deeks ruffled Caleb’s hair, and nodded to the sink. “Ok. Clear your plate and then go brush your teeth and change into your trunks,” Deeks instructed him, and Deeks hopped up, whooping on his way out of the kitchen. “And don’t forget to brush your teeth.

They’d just carted out a few boards in and totes with their supplies when Kensi pulled up.

“Kensi?!” Caleb shouted, dropping his tote back on the ground, and raced to meet her. “I didn’t know you were coming!”

“Hi, sweetheart. I hope it’s a good surprise,” Kensi said, bending to hug him.

“Of course it is!” Taking her hand, Caleb walked with her back to Deeks.

Kensi greeted him with a quick kiss behind the cover of he truck, which made Caleb giggle.

When the boards and bags were all packed up, the piled in and headed for the beach. Deeks turned the radio to an oldies station, rolled down the windows, and sang along to John Denver and Bread. Caleb even got Kensi to join in, though she resisted at first until they both sang at the top of their lungs.

***

As soon as they parked, Caleb unbuckled his seatbelt and jumped out, barely waiting long enough to grab their boards and totes before he was running off.

“A kid after my own heart,” Deeks commented proudly. They watched him slow to a stop about 20 yards ahead, balancing his board on his head while he waited for them to catch up.

“He’s been talking about going all week,” Kensi told him with a fond smile. “I’m surprised you don’t go more often. Caleb informed me you’re very good.”

Deeks shrugged off her compliment, even as he threw his shoulders back a little. “Eh, I won a couple competitions when I was younger and stayed her during the summers. Now I just do it for fun. Nothing like being out on the water on a sunny day. What about you? I bet you’ve got some special moves.”

“I’ve been out a couple times, but swimming has always been more my speed. I may or may not have gone to nationals my senior year of high school.”

Deeks stopped holding up a hand. “Woah, you can’t just drop that kind of information in so casually. Why am I only hearing about this now?” he demanded.

“I like to keep you guessing.”

“Oh, well I definitely will need a demonstration today.”

“Only if you show me your fancy surf moves Caleb keeps bragging about,” Kensi said, turning to walk backwards, a playful smile creeping at her lips. “We’ll make it a competition.”

They walked the rest of the way down hand-in-hand; Caleb waited impatiently at the end of the path, hanging off of anything that would hold him. As soon as they reached the beach, he took off again, stripping off his shirt and racing for the water with his board under one arm.

Kensi and Deeks stopped about three yards from the water to set everything up.

“He really is a little water bug, isn’t he?” Kensi mused, eyes on Caleb, who had just toppled into the water, immediately getting back up to try again.

“He’s still getting the hang of staying on his board, but he just keeps trying. I’m just glad he loves it.” Deeks turned around to face Kensi, who was in the process of stripping off her coverup, hair momentarily obscuring her face, and he was suddenly breathless. She wore a royal blue one piece, the color accentuating her tanned skin. His eyes drifted across her legs, and then back up again.

Kensi shook out her hair, smirking when she noticed him staring.

“Something catch your attention? Sorry, I didn’t think a bikini would be appropriate,” she said wryly. He cleared his throat a couple times. He blamed the sun for his suddenly overheated skin.

“I’m pretty sure that would kill me,” he replied hoarsely. Kensi lowered her eyes, stalking closer to him, and he swallowed heavily, watching her every move. She didn’t stop until they were nearly pressed against one another, probably a little too intimate for a public setting. Looping her arms around his neck, she slid her hands down his back, briefly pausing at the small of his back before dropping lower.

He chuckled breathily. “Something I can help you with, Miss Blye?”

“No, I think I found what I want.” She winked, giving him a firm squeeze before she tipped her face up towards his. Deeks’ lips parted in anticipation, and he shifted ever so slightly closer. Just before their lips touched, Kensi whispered,

“Race you.” She released him, laughing as she turned and ran in the opposite direction. It took a few seconds for his brain to catch up.

“Cheater!” he yelled, racing to catch up.

They spent the rest of the day playing in the water, building sandcastles, and investing various contests for each other. Caleb appointed himself judge of the swimming and surfing completion between Kensi and Deeks.

It might have been years since Kensi had swum competitively, but she hadn’t lost any of her skills, and beat him by a few seconds. She managed to ride approximately half a wave, which Deeks found pretty impressive give her lack of experience, and then she happily watched him show off for a few minutes.

The next time they came back to the shore, Caleb awarded them each circular rocks he found in the place of medals.

***

By six in the evening, they’d consumed all of the food they’d brought with and were exhausted and covered in sand. Deeks didn’t feel like cooking anything, so they took everything back to the truck, and stopped for fish tacos from a little stand.

“I think we successfully wiped him out,” Kensi commented when Caleb’s eyes drifted closed mid-taco, and he fell into Deeks’ shoulder.

“Yeah, he’ll sleep good tonight. So what do you have going on tomorrow?”

Kensi finished the last bite of her taco and leaned back to stretch before responding. “Mm. I need to finish some lesson plans. I also should call my mom, but otherwise I don’t have anything else.” She shrugged. “

“Then can I tempt you with a pot roast dinner?” Deeks asked.

“You can make me pot roast dinner every night,” Kensi said eagerly. “With an occasional lasagna night.”

“I knew it. You’re with me for my cooking skills.”

Winking, Kensi snuck a few shreds of cheese from the top of his last taco.

“You figured me out. Next I’m going to get you to clean the mountain of dishes in my sink.”

Deeks tipped his head back with a grin. She grinned back, stealing more toppings from his plate. They continued chatting while they finished off the last bit of food.

He was halfway through a new story involving Talia and their latest hire when his phone buzzed. He fished it out of his pocket, and frowned at the family number, his mood taking a nosedive as he read the accompanying text.

“It’s from Monica. She wants me to call her lawyer tomorrow,” Deeks relayed grimly. “Unfortunately, I think we’ll have to cut tonight short.”

“I understand. Let me know what you find out,” Kensi requested, gently grasping his chin between her thumb and forefinger. She kissed him softly, rubbing the pad of her thumb over his bottom lip. “Love you.”

“I will.”

He told himself that this was a good thing. Monica had listened for once, which hopefully meant that she wouldn’t be pulling her usual games. Still, he couldn’t quell the uneasy feeling in his stomach even as he tried let Kensi pull him back into conversation.

[edsbacktattoo]

☼ new positivity game ☼ tag your fave people on this website and say something nice about each of them ❥

HIII ANON! yes yes i love to spread love and positivity

i’ve had this sitting in my inbox for a couple of days until i wasn’t working and/or exhausted so now it’s got my full attention. time to dive right the fuck in. get ready to be loved on folks

(i just got halfway through this post and realised how long it’s gonna be lmfao whoops. all the compliments are under the cut ♥️ i have a whole lot of love to give.)

i’m gonna start this with @tisziny. everyone has to know by now how much they mean to me. so supportive and kind and wonderful. always the first person in line to offer help or advice, or the first to say something nice. silly and hilarious, but so warm and open as well. my day wouldn’t be complete without talking to them now. and i wouldn’t have gotten this far in the fic writing scene without their unrestrained support and enthusiasm. i owe them a great debt (it’s my heart and they already have it). my sweetest cheese ♥️

@skysofrey do NOT. get me started on Kaitlin. i will genuinely cry. i will weep. she’s so funny and sweet and nice and pretty. and so unabashedly supportive and so fuckin’ funny. oh my god. do you ever just th…. surjwbueeh just think about your friends (or your wife 6 times over) and hehdiw… idiewj start weeping????? she’s so cool. like she’s way out of my league but we’re gonna set the world record for most times married you watch. i’ll show you all

@blakbonnet ohggg. Meow. you’re so so funny and so evil to me. but i forgive you because i love you so dearly. so creative and talented and wonderful. ill even overlook the beard situation for you. we can’t all be perfect (like me) but you come pretty damn close. can’t wait to settle down in a mansion and adopt like 7 dogs with you love 💕

@stedebonnets ARA!!!!!! everyone look. ara without a word of exaggeration is one of THEE NICEST people I have ever had the absolute pleasure of knowing. puts everyone else first, cares so so much about the people around her. will sometimes just drop into my inbox and say the sweetest most genuine thing and it reminds me that there is in fact goodness on this barren and hideous planet. the world would be a kinder place if there were more people like Ara around. it’s you me and Arthur against the world Ara and we’re gonna MAKE IT!!!!

@bunnyandthejets Bun. ougyggghh it’s Bun Time. I love you forever and ever and ever. unbelievably hilarious and so so kind. every time i see you in my notifs or in my inbox my heart does a whole song and dance. you’ve made me laugh more times than I can count and I am so so grateful for your endless support. if Big John was real you’d be his favourite <3

@vampirebutterflies ASTER!!! my favourite queer in crime!!! absolute darling angel from heaven. still waiting for our planetarium date babe. the way i kept seeing you being fuckin hilarious and sexy in my notes and went THATS IT!!!!!!! WE HAVE TO BE FRIENDS FOREVER and then made a blood pact with you. to the grave babe mwah <3

@epersonae so so kind and so supportive and delightful. been here since day one, cheering me on and being so open and sincere. there are few in the world as good and as kind as you. such a skilled and thoughtful writer as well!!! writes some of the most wonderful fic I’ve ever read and if you’re not here for Hungry for love, ready to drown what are you even doing

@xoxoemynn ohghhhh you’re just so full of love marianne. so full of love and light and beans and i am obsessed with you. so friendly and thoughtful and so NICE!!!! i dunno what we did to deserve you for real. it takes practice to be as sweet as you are and my friend you are a master of your craft <3

@blackbeardskneebrace miles. my beloved angel miles. you’re so so skilled (one of the most impressive artists on All Of The Internet) and so thoughtful and sweet and sincere. you’re way too cool and funny and smart for me but here we are. i would fight god for you bud. i’d win btw i have insane person rage <3

@leatherdaddyteach oh MANNNN don’t get me started on Joey. sexiest most wonderful mfer in these whole entire woods. hilarious and kind with also the most elite taste in music (not even my opinion that’s just objective fact babe mwah) also we are kissing right on the mouth. i’d give you all my teeth if i could. like i don’t need them babe they’re yours now

@chocolatepot cassidy is one of those people who are just effortlessly kind and thoughtful. so ready to share everyone’s creative endeavours and also persists in being an absolutely incredible writer. i’ve said it once i’ll say it again but More Nicer is one of my favourite one shots. it’s so so cute and i think about it every day.

@wearfinethingsalltoowell Joy my beloved. so nice and thoughtful and sweet. a fellow olu enjoyer to the maximum and a fellow Team Bared Until We Die. We got each other’s backs out here in the trenches. i forgive you for all the times your angst posts have made me cry <3 (no i don’t i hold a grudge. think of my organs)

@nofeelingisfinall Zed my darling my dear my angel. you’re so sexy and smart and kind and 💍 what if we smooch forever. you make my heart go so fast (bc i’m in love with you). another person with yummy delicious music taste and also your web weavings make me cry and weep. like i love you why must you hurt me. i just want peace

@sassygwaine adrian you are so so nice and sweet. like when i picture you i picture a forest that’s full of greenery and life after a little bit of rain ya know? that’s the kind of person you are. so full of love and sincerity and also you’re hilarious and smart and always correct. i’m building us a blanket fort. the door’s the blue cushion

@flightoftheconnie fr you’re way too cool for me. i know this down to my bones. but idc, you me and kaitlin are getting married come spring. let’s run away together and hijack some cars and rob some banks and then make out. i’ll kill all your enemies for you send me a list of names and it’ll be done. mwah <3

@snake-snack-stede oh man. outtghhffg man. Olivia. you’re seriously one of the most creative and delightful people on this shit-hole app. every single post you make is pure gold. don’t get me started on your tags. like being that effortlessly funny is such a skill and you’ve mastered it. but also you are so so kind and sweet too. i’m convinced you could rule the world and i think you’d do it perfectly. i have a huge crush on you btw can you tell?

@jellybeanium124 another person with a godly sense of humour. how dare you all be funnier than me. nina you’re so nice and also you’ve never been wrong ever. all of your takes are objectively correct. how does it feel being cooler and sexier than the rest of us?

@awkward-fallen-angel ohhh heather you’re so sweet!!! and super creative as well!!! always super happy to have a little chat you’re always so enthusiastic and excited about the things you love and care about. so much love for you my dear friend

@sherlockig hi alexz!!!! a stede bonnet lover first and a person second. you’re such an absolute delight, and you’re always cheering on and supporting your friends which i really admire. certified hot as well. come here i gotta give you a smooch

@cheersmequeers kate!!! hi hi!!! you’re so genuine and fun and nice, and i’m always so so happy to see you in my notifs. you’ve got so much love in your heart and i think that’s beautiful. a thousand smooches for you <3

if i've forgotten anyone (and I'm sure I probably have) then pls punch me in the head :) put me straight in the bin fr. just know that even if you aren't on this list that I am very in love with you and I think we should fuck nasty <3

[rmhashauthor]

hello hello! how is your latest writing WIP coming along? Are there any particular scenes you're really looking forward to writing? Any characters you've fallen in love with more than you anticipated? (this is a friendly excuse to talk about your story and characters!)

Oh boy... You've opened the floodgates, my friend.

The Dragon Prince's Consort is going well, I'm several chapters ahead of the posting schedule but I am having to acknowledge the fact that I've been on a little bit of a dry spell because of starting a new job. It's one of those that needs a lot of brainpower in the beginning because I'm still training, and I'm the kind of person who stresses out if things aren't just *PERFECT* so the period between "I'm new so no one expects me to know anything yet" and "I've been here long enough to know what I'm doing" is my least-favorite part of starting a new job. Some days I come home with half a brain cell and just enough energy left to eat a handful of shredded cheese and go to sleep. Damn you, capitalism! Let me write!!

But enough of that.

At the moment TDPC is hovering just under 160 reads on Wattpad, which is fine because a lot of people who follow me wait until I'm done writing to binge. STARFISH was like that, once I let everyone know it was DONE done I started getting weekend warriors who would mainline the whole thing in a couple of days and flood my inbox with screaming emojis. Someone is doing that right now and it's always a delight.

Anyway, TDPC is all plotted out and has been for a while now, so the task is to finish writing the damn thing. And like most ADHD people I already have another story lined up that I'm working on an outline for and may or may not have started drafting the first chapter 😉 I like to take little breaks from one story and work on something else to keep things fresh and interesting, otherwise it's like eating pizza for breakfast, lunch and dinner - pizza is great, I love pizza, but by Day 2 I'll gnaw off my own legs for a salad or some soup.

This new one I'm excited about because I've never written a true Villain before. Well, he's not really a villain, per se, more like a "fuck you, fuck your rules, I do what I want" type of guy. I figured if I've written two stories with cinnamon-roll male leads it's time for someone who's more a walking middle finger to society and laws in general. While he's not a mass-murderer or anything, this guy definitely has blood on his hands and isn't the easiest to live with, as the heroine will find out once she's conscious again. I figure most people love a Bad Boy who is a Good Man, so I'm going to see what I can do with that.

Now for his foil, boy is SHE a mess. Look, someone is going to take one look at this sorry thing and yell BOO MARY SUE but frankly I don't care. There's a point to making her such a sad sack and it won't become clear until her bastardization arc kicks in. Plus, I figure if she has a history of making terrible decisions when it comes to men then having her do a little more of the same is in-character for her. Except maybe this time it's different because she's trying NOT to be such a good girl, maybe this time she won't be so naive and her newfound cynicism might prove useful.

The whole story has a Heavy Metal (of which I am a MASSIVE fan) vibe to it, it's a lot grittier than my last two and that's on purpose. I've been listening to a lot of psychedelic doom metal (more than usual) to get my head in the right space for it, which has been interesting. It's not going to be a pretty story, full of flowers and sparkles and happy, because at this point in the universe in my head all the shiny has worn off the concept of First Contact and now we have to deal with the realities of life in space among half a dozen other species, all with their own goals, fears and issues. I've decided to leave my comfort zone of writing cute stories about sweet people and instead do something that I think a lot of people are going to see as dark and even problematic - some themes are not going to be easy to digest, even for someone like me who's lived a relatively easy life, but I hope that I can do some justice to it by 1, talking about it and thus making it less taboo, and 2, doing what I usually do which is make the plot as important as the sexy bits.

However, I do have some hard rules I DON'T break while writing, and there are a few things I will NOT use as plot devices or tropes - I don't write about SA, I won't write an abusive relationship, and I don't do age gaps where one person is underage. I may go right up to the line and stare at it, but not only am I not comfortable writing those I don't want to drive readers off. I'm grey about "trigger warnings" in that I think people should be prepared to run into things that may upset them in fiction, film and art because that's the whole point, but I also believe in self-censorship and letting people decide for themselves to put down something I or another creator has made. It's only fair to give readers an out when things get too hairy, I've put down a LOT of books because the author decided that dubcon was okay when it wasn't, or because their male MC was just an insufferable ass with Alpha Male syndrome (yuck). Hell, I've lost interest in entire SERIES because I've seen tropes get subverted and then the author goes back on the old trope, completely derailing and destroying what could have been a WONDERFUL twist because they didn't commit to getting weird with it. Like my late father always said, "If you're gonna be a bear, be a Grizzly." At the very least, be a Grizzly in a funny hat.

Scenes I'm really looking forward to include Captain PTSD's "aren't you tired of being good?" speech, Miss Sad Sack discovering his "Daddy Mode" and being UNCOMFORTABLY turned on by it, a recurring bit where she has to sit in his lap for business reasons and it is excruciatingly embarrassing how much she comes to like it, an incident where wounds are literally licked in super-inappropriate places, a plethora of R-rated one-liners, and a frankly STUPID amount of sexual tension between two idiots who know EXACTLY what needs to happen, but pride, stubbornness and personal convictions keep it from happening (just... SO MUCH TENSION). A lot of really bad decisions will be made and people are gonna get hurt, but I'm hoping by the end what looks like the beginning of a Very Bad Situation will turn out to be the best thing that ever happened to both of them. I'm also looking forward to playing with more Daddy-dom scenarios that AREN'T borderline abusive, the concept of "you cannot legislate morality", a new alien species with some WEIRD behavioral quirks, and ☆*KNOTTING*☆ Yaaaay!

If you're gonna be a bear, be a Space-Grizzly with a wizard hat and a tricycle made of napalm and glitter.

[writingsbychlo]

💭

Ayyy Congrats Chlo! Can I get a 💭 of Noah when his girl is pregnant? Like how is he through it snd when she's in labor?

no more requests, the sleepover is over, I'm just finishing up what's in my inbox!

I got so carried away with this

he would be so good by the labour stage

but lets be real, he takes a hot minute to get adjusted

now, don't get me wrong, this was planned

and he is damn excited to be a dad

you've been taking folic acid and vitamin D and all the good stuff

and you were both elated and crying when the test came back positive

but he does take a moment to actually realise what it means

like he did not think that far through, if he's honest

rubbing your back throughout morning sickness

but like, he doesn't quite get it

you have a significantly lowered sex drive

breast tenderness and morning sickness and he is kinda sexually frustrated

it takes him a moment to adjust to that because y'all had been pretty active before, and he has to take care of himself now

not to mention, you're a lot more sleepy

he knew you'd get sleepy, but he expected it to come later, not as early in the pregnancy as the first few weeks

so there's a lot of things that have to be cancelled

like concerts and things

but he was looking forwards to them

and it causes some arguments to begin with

like when he went to the concert with boyd instead

and you'd put a blanket and pillow on the couch for him

or the argument that came with him insisting that he could ride the bike a little longer

and the little strop he gets in when you throw out all the foods on the list your midwife gave you after your first antenatal appointment

"you can't eat them, but I can! why do we have to throw it all out?"

"because you're supposed to be supporting me!"

"I am supporting you, but I still want to eat my food!"

"fine, keep it then!"

and he feels bad two weeks later when you go to game night

and derek and stiles have laid out an awesome looking spread

with charcuterie boards and cheeses and crackers and wine

and he knows how much you love all of that stuff

and you literally can't have any of it

in fact, you brought your own meal, which is a salad and plain crackers and it's not exactly game night material

and so he does some research into food and writes down everything you can and can't have

and he watches a video on best recipes for pregnancy and he makes one for you

a little surprise dinner for when you get home from work

"what's all this?"

"well, you know, your meals look kinda' miserable. but, you're literally growing our child, so you should get to eat nice things, and I googled a good recipe for pregnancy safe meals."

noah getting laid that night

and afterwards, when you're asleep on his chest, he realises how easy it is when he stops thinking it's gonna be a struggle

at around about 7 weeks, you start getting more emotional

crying more at movies and getting mad at random things and being a lot clingier than usual

which he doesn't mind, of course

but it freaks him out sometimes

"noah, what the fuck?" while in tears and he's freaking out because he has no idea how bad he fucked up or what he did "there's a dead bird in the garden, noah, that's got to be some kind of omen, oh my god, what if you die? why would you just die, noah?"

so he cleans up the dead bird

but now you're mad because you're worried about him abandoning you

"baby, if I was gonna' abandon you then why would I have married you, huh?"

and it takes him a hot minute to get used to that too

however, he also learns how to direct it at other people for his own amusement

"hey, baby, did you know that stiles wears socks to bed, even in the summer?"

"you wear socks to sleep in the summer? you're sick, stiles. you're sick. I don't want you near my child, you're weird, you and your socks and your sweaty toes can stay away. you're so gross."

"what the fuck?"

and noah just laughing his ass off about it

you also have to pee a lot more so noah has to take that into account

you're still fully able to go hiking and do the things the two of you love doing

but he has to plan in your pee breaks

not to mention, you're still throwing up every morning

so, he can't plan too much, but he does plan a little weekend getaway for you both

with a privately rented cabin so that you can throw up each morning in peace and don't feel like you're being watched

panicking when you get spotting at week 8

and that really throws you both through a loop

rushing to the hospital and he's unfamiliar with driving your car

so it stresses him out to know he's useless in emergencies

it turns out to be nothing

but noah is pretty sure he's never cried that hard

not to mention, in a public bathroom, just so he didn't scare you

and when he gets home, like, fuck, it's a reality check for him

he starts getting driving lessons

he has a license and all but he's rusty

and he wants to be prepared, so he starts taking lessons

he also starts checking out bigger cars for the two of you

because your little car won't do in a few years

"you know, not that I'm complaining, but I've noticed you aren't wearing bras anymore."

watching your cheeks go fucking warm as you get all embarrassed

"do you wanna go shopping, get some comfier ones?"

"you are gonna go pregnancy bra shopping with me?"

"well, considering how proud I am when I get to go regular bra shopping with you, I think pregnancy bra shopping is the same."

going with you to get tests and scans done

literally crying again when you hear the heartbeat

"we made that, oh my god."

texting everyone he knows when you get your due date estimate

holding your hands when you have to get your pregnancy vaccinations

actually taking notes when the midwife starts talking about making a birthing plan and getting things sorted before you get to the third trimester

and he does a lot of research on birthing plans and starts prepping

going on every shopping trip with you

"I want to get the nursery painted, like, a while before the baby comes. so we can air it out for fumes."

"we can go check samples out this weekend."

"well, I mean, that's soon, like, really?"

"yeah, whatever you want, sunshine."

getting laid again

and when the morning sickness goes away, he starts getting his late morning sleep back

starting to get self-conscious about extra pregnancy weight gain

and noah doing everything he can to reassure you

but as you get into the second trimester, your sex drive suddenly jumps back up

and he fucking loves it

because that's a lot of unprotected sex and a lot of making out and a lot of touching

and honestly, something about it is really turning him on

"baby, I don't know if it's your glow or the fact that I am literally so in love with you, or maybe the months of not having sex, but I've literally never been this hard."

"shut up and fuck me, you can compliment me later."

"'kay."

throughout your second trimester, you get everything done

the nursery gets decorated and the furniture is built and it's perfect

there's only the little touches now, like mobiles and clothes and such

he also bought the new car, and traded yours in

and he arranged for you to get lessons in it too, so you know how to drive a bigger car before you get too pregnant to drive safely

crying the first time the baby moves. so much fucking crying.

and getting so excited every time

it's few and far between in the middle of your second trimester, but it's so meaningful

starting to go to pregnancy classes

and he also signs you both up for a pregnancy exercise class

that is supposedly meant to make labour easier because of the pelvic floor exercises

having a few days where you're nervous around him

thinking he did something wrong

"I think I'm gonna want to take an epidural."

"that's what you've been so worried about?"

"well, yeah. I read all these pamphlets about how it's so controversial and sometimes the dads don't like it, an-"

"I want you to be happy, okay? it's gonna be a happy time, so whatever you want, we'll do, okay? I want you to smile when you look back on the birth of our baby."

"I love you, so damn much."

"I love you so damn much."

finding out the sex of the baby, neither of you wants to wait

telling everyone it's a secret until the baby shower

your bump really starting to come in at the end of the second trimester

as well as headaches and backaches and stretch marks

and noah always making sure to kiss it better

a lot of nice warm baths and washing your hair for you

the baby starts responding to touch and sound, though

noah starts talking to the baby a lot

telling them about your day and rubbing lotion on your stomach

the baby getting hiccups for the first time

in the beginning of the second trimester, you start choosing names

more tears when you settle on a name

the third trimester is where you really start feeling it

you’ve got mood swings, you’ve got backache, and you’re getting a lot of odd cravings

all of which noah indulges for you

some make him gag and he actually cannot watch you eat it

banning food in bed

it caused an argument but he won that one

announcing the gender at your baby shower

you and noah dressing in white while waiting for everyone’s guesses

it’s a girl!

you announced it via a little cake cutting ceremony that was pink inside

using those last few weeks to decorate the nursery with teddies and buy clothes

when you finally go into labour it’s actually while you’re hanging out with stiles and derek

thinking it’s just cramps for a while

because you’ve been having cramps, you think it’s fine

until

“uh, (Y/N), you know I love you, but did you pee on my couch?”

“excuse me, I did not pee on your couch an- oh my god, they’re contractions.”

noah literally choking on his drink

you rubbing his back as he tries to cough it up

panicking so much that his whole fucking birthing plan goes out of the window

“the bag is at home!”

“what about your pillow?”

“fuck! fuck! fuck!”

derek is the only calm one because stiles is;

“HOLY FUCK, IM GONNA BE AN UNCLE, GIMME A NEICE!”

and noah is 

“HOLY FUCK, IM GONNA BE A FATHER!”

so derek coordinates it all while you just kinda sit there and watch it all

“okay, well, her contractions are now, like, eight minutes apart, so maybe we should get a move on.”

telling stiles to take you to the hopsital while he takes noah to pick everything up

and off you go

stiles is fucking buzzing the whole way there

calling your hospital to inform them you’re on your way

getting to the hospital and being greeted by your midwife

“lovely to see you again, mom and dad”

“I DIDN’T MAKE THAT.”

“thanks, stiles.” your midwife being confused. “this is the uncle, they’re twins. dad is on his way.”

“I’M THE UNCLE!”

“stop shouting stiles, the baby won’t come out, you’re scaring it back up.”

“sorry.”

stiles holding your hand

noah arriving five minutes later with more than enough stuff

“I didn’t know which pjs you’d want after so I brought options!”

after a good few hours of labour, and noah being there for all of it, your baby is born

literally crashing right after and sleeping for a while

“‘bout fuckin time you woke up, noah won’t let me see my niece ‘til you have. hurry up.”

“I will punch you so hard you’ll be glad you’re in a hospital.”

“that’s my wife”

“sorry.”

meeting your daughter with noah, and having a moment

because he’s put her in a little pink striped onesie and she’s got a baby beanie on

“she’s got your nose.”

“you can’t tell that, she’s like six hours old.”

“i can hope.”

finally taking her to meet stiles who practically dies on the spot

he cries a lot when he finally gets to hold his niece

“stiles, derek, meet ‘hope claudia stilinski’.”

[ladykissingfish]

The Great Akatsuki Bake-Off

*this was a request in my inbox, I’m so sorry Anonymous I accidentally deleted it before I could reply, but I saw your message and here’s the response! ❤️*

Premise: The Akatsuki is broke af (again), and Pein comes up with the idea of having a bake sale to earn money. Every member of the Akatsuki makes a dessert to sell; chaos (or hilarity) ensues.

**Also I picture them setting up tables outside of one of the Akatsuki hideout caves which of course is equipped with a fully functioning kitchen because why not Jim**

Pein

It was his idea, he’s the leader, so naturally he ain’t cooking. The most the Pein-body will do is sit in the kitchen with Konan while she cooks, offering his opinion or praise.

Kisame

Kisame isn’t the biggest fan of sweets, so is at a bit of a loss for what to make. In the end, he decides to go with something that’s decidedly more savory than sweet; bacon-flavored scones with a maple syrup glazing. This requires some kneading and precise shaping, the latter of which requires small, delicate fingers that Kisame borrows Konan for. Should be noted that he wears a pink Kiss The Cook apron, and he blushes like crazy when Konan reads it and delivers one to his cheek. He gets a bit over-exuberant with the icing, getting more of it on the table than the actual scones. However, the end result is light, fluffy, and absolutely delicious. Deidara especially loves the bacon aspect, and is able to snitch a great number of these until Kakuzu catches him and forces him to pay up.

Deidara

Deidara would make a classic lava cake. He’d know absolutely nothing about this dessert beforehand; he’d be going through a cookbook, his eyes would fixate on the word “lava”, and he’d be sold. Sasori insists that he put on rubber gloves beforehand, because “Nobody wants your hand-drool in their food, brat.” Lava cake requires a very delicate touch and precise timing, something that Deidara has had to become familiar with when deploying his arsenal of bombs. Yet despite being careful he would have to start and re-start this mix many times; maybe he gets eggshells in the batter here, or mistakes oil for milk there. The inside of a lava cake has to smooth and liquid-y but the outside has to be soft yet firm; a single minute in the oven can make the difference between wonderful and awful for these little cakes. When he finally perfects one, he’s ecstatic; but the rest of the group is horrified, at how destroyed the kitchen is. Chocolate batter and powdered sugar covering every wall; yet, somehow, the guy himself remains spotless. Also, Deidara has made another critical error; he assumed that because the recipe was for a cake, it was for a LARGE cake that he could cut into sections and sell piece by piece. However, lava cakes are always small, individual desserts ... and Deidara has only made ONE. Still, he’ll take his one beauty and sell it almost immediately, leaving him time to wander around and filch “free samples” from everyone else’s dishes.

Zetsu

Nobody wants Zetsu trying to cook, because everyone is terrified of what he’d put into his creations. However, White Zetsu insists that (t)he(y) wants to participate, so the others hesitantly let him do so (with everyone periodically coming in to monitor him). His contribution? Pie. Zetsu knows that the key to delicious pie is in the light flakiness of the crust, and he creates several pies that literally melt in the mouth. And he doesn’t just do one flavor; he does apple, blueberry, cherry, and something he calls “surprise berry” ((which is really just a mix of raspberry, blackberry, and strawberry). Before Tobi goes to help Itachi, he’s in charge of helping Zetsu gather up the fruit, and he helps to peel and core and pit and wash until “my hands are really sleepy Zetsu-san!” Zetsu thinks his pies are perfect creations as a whole but Kakuzu insists he cuts them into individual slices to maximize profits, which White Zetsu balks over but Black Zetsu tells him to be quiet about.

Konan

Konan is a delicate, beautiful flower, so naturally anything she makes would reflect this. After much deliberation, she decides to make her version of a layered lemon mascarpone cake. The cake itself is a wonderfully moist vanilla sponge infused with lemon curd, layered with a thick lemon, honey and mascarpone cream, topped with fresh berries, and a light sprinkle of chopped pecans. At first she was only going to make one cake and portion it out into about 20 small pieces; but the demand for it was so high that Kakuzu told her he’d stay and sell the rest while she got back into the kitchen and made another. She’s by far the neatest chef in the kitchen, as she cleans up her mess as she goes so when she’s through, all she has to wash is the empty cake pan itself. She makes sure to save a large piece to secretly take to Nagato later; it’s been a long time since he’s had anything sweet to eat.

Kakuzu

Kakuzu doesn’t want to cook; he’d rather be the one running the sale. However he recognizes that the more desserts they have the more profit they can make, so he grudgingly makes a few trays of brownies. His secret ingredient? Sour cream. At first everyone sees him putting this into his mix and think he’s gone crazy; however, after they try one ((and don’t think for a second he’s not charging his fellow teammates for even a tiny sliver)) they’re blown away by how good they are. After he sets his items on the table, he’s the one who collects the money from the customers. Has to be talked down from the exorbitant prices that he tries to charge people at first. “How much for a piece of blueberry pie?” “500,000 ¥.”

Sasori

He really isn’t into baking (because why would he be? he doesn’t eat) but he knows how to read and follow a recipe. After some careful thought, he chooses to make cupcakes. At first he resolves only to make a dozen, and to keep it all one simple flavor: the chocolate with vanilla frosting that’s in the recipe. Yet as he stands there, a feeling takes hold of him; he remembers happier times, perched on a stool in the kitchen and watching/helping his grandmother as she cooked. That nostalgia drives him to get more creative, and make MUCH more than intended. Some of his creations are great; such as his ginger-chocolate cupcakes with fudge icing. But others, like his broccoli and carrot cake topped with “spicy” cream cheese, not so much. Regardless, the majority of his creations sell, which Sasori’s pleased about. Should be noted that Kakuzu did not entirely trust Sasori not to put some kind of poison into his dessert, so he forced Hidan to sneak and taste-test everything (as he’s the only one who would regenerate from certain death). But Hidan wouldn’t know arsenic from cinnamon; and he winds up with a hell of a stomach-ache after his forced culinary servitude.

Itachi and Tobi

Seeing as how he loves dango so much, Itachi decides to make several dozen sticks of the tri-colored sweet rice dumplings. He keeps the pink dumpling the common strawberry flavor, and the white plain, but he does something special with the green ball, flavoring it with vanilla extract and green tea. Because Tobi is a nightmare in the kitchen (and because he needs supervision when it comes to sweets), Itachi allows him to help, mainly in the form of sticking the dumplings neatly on the stick once they’re shaped. He’s a good helper, except for when Itachi takes his eyes off of him, as he likes to add icing, sprinkles, and a variety of decadent extras that don’t belong on this simple dessert. And it’s a good thing that Itachi makes so many, seeing as they BOTH sneak and eat quite a few when the other is distracted. Tobi is very helpful when it comes to pushing their wares, as his carefree, childlike demeanor attracts customers to their table.

Hidan

Hidan wants something that’s visually representative of him, so what does he make? Red velvet cake bars. The outside is covered with a white-silver frosting, but when you cut into it, the deep red of the cake greatly resembles blood. Hidan isn’t the best at baking (or cooking in general) so he asks Konan to help him when she’s not occupied with her own dish. He’s surprisingly calm and conscientious in the kitchen, keeping his swearing to a minimum and being extra-careful with measuring out ingredients and waiting on the oven to do its thing. He borrows Kisame’s Kiss The Cook apron, only he crosses out the second O and replaces it with a C. His bars come out slightly uneven but really good nonetheless. However, being Hidan, he can’t resist throwing in a prank; he saves some of the cake batter and holds it in his mouth, then, after taking a bite of someone else’s fare, claims that it’s poisoned and spits “blood” out of his mouth, which freaks out their early customers until Kakuzu catches him and exiles him back inside.

[hihellogoodbyebruh]

Is She the Reason?

Pairing: Angel Reyes x Black!Reader

Summary: Angel has been distant lately and Y/N discovers the reason why.

Warning(s): Foul language, angst, cheating :(

Word count: 1,831

Author’s Note: I’ve been in a sad mood so this kind of came out of that. Plus of course the Destiny’s Child song of the same title was inspiration. There is kind of a prequel in my docs that may get posted in the future. We shall see. Also the text in the gif isn’t relevant, I just needed sad Angel. Questions, comments, and concerns are always welcome. My inbox is open. Enjoy!

Part 2

The MC was dealing with a very busy couple of weeks. With the Galindos now working with Rebels, the Mayans were needed to help facilitate the relationship incognito. Angel had a position now so his responsibilities were even greater and you’d seen him less and less. He used to call and text frequently, but you stopped receiving those all the time as well. Something felt wrong, but you chalked it up to him just being busy. You missed just being in his arms and seeing that annoyingly sexy smile on his face. You knew the guys were running day in and day out so you wanted to do something for them. With the help of Chucky, you organized a special dinner for everyone. You knew it could get interrupted with urgent club news, but you had to try.

With meat provided by Pops and sides prepared by you, the boys practically had a feast laid out in the middle of the clubhouse. You had come to really care about all members of the club. Your father was a retired police captain who always had a soft spot for the club. He was actually friends with Bishop and Marcus. You’d known them all your life. Of course EZ, Coco, and Gilly had a special place in your heart because of their closeness to Angel. They became like brothers to you quickly. EZ was the baby brother with the gentle soul, Coco was the wild one, and Gilly was just so damn lovable. They were the perfect balances for Angel and you were so happy he had them in his life.

As you finished making sure everything was laid out to perfection, you heard the rumblings of engines outside.

“They’re here!” Chucky excitedly declared and you couldn’t help but laugh.

“Yes I can hear that Chucky. Start opening some beers up, yeah?” You suggested and he nodded his head as he followed instructions. You had just made your way from behind the bar when the doors opened.

“Something smells good as fuck in here. No way Chucky cooked.” Bishop stated as he walked in with Taza and Loza behind him.

“Absolutely not. I love y’all too much for that. I figured you busy men deserved a nice home cooked meal. Dig in, Jefe.” You announced, smiling at them. Obispo was like a second father to you. Your father and him had developed a highly unlikely friendship that was still strong after all these years. They played cards every week.

“Gracias, chica.” Bishop replied, placing a paternal kiss on the side of your head before walking towards where Chucky had beers lined out.

You were greeted and hugged by the rest of the gang, with Coco and Gilly pulling up the rear.

“You cooked, Y/N? Please tell me you made mac and cheese.” Coco asked, with the closest thing to a pout on his face that you’d ever see.

“Nope. Not this time.” You lied, just to see his and Gilly’s faces dropped. It was so funny.

“I’m just playing. Of course I-” You couldn’t even finish your sentence because Gilly and Coco were racing each other to get to the pan first. 

“Y’all better share!” You yelled after them, laughing and shaking your head before heading towards the door. Angel hadn’t been inside yet so you figured he was outside talking to EZ. You had on your favorite pair of jeans that hugged your ass just how he liked it and you had recently taken down your braids to let your natural hair breathe. You had a fresh twist out and you knew your tight curls bouncy and shining in the sunlight.

As you stepped outside, you spotted Angel immediately. He was leaning against the side of the opened van door speaking with a woman sitting down on the van’s floor. You tried not to let yourself be the jealous type. Angel was a very attractive man that often had girls trying to holla at him. He never seemed to entertain them. Nah, it wasn’t the fact that he was talking to a woman that bothered you. It’s the way he was talking to her.

He was completely engrossed by her. You could only see his profile but you recognized the softness in his face. It’s the same look he would give to you. The look that had you feeling like you were the center of his universe. Your breath caught in your throat as you watched the genuine smile that spread across his face as he became amused at something the woman said. You watched his hand run up her forearm and give it a gentle squeeze. There was nothing overtly sexual happening, but the intimacy of it all broke your heart.

The woman wasn’t someone familiar to you. At first. But then you spotted the unique tattoo on her neck. You had heard that tattoo described before. Adelita. The rebel leader. She was beautiful. There was a quiet power to her that almost pulled you in. All of the dots began connecting in your head. All those times he mentioned Adelita and how smart she was, how brave she was, what a badass she was. You thought it was just respect, but now you see it’s more than that. Something was going on between them.

Noise caught your attention and from your peripheral you spotted EZ coming out from his RV. You watched him assess the situation in seconds flat. You turned your head to make eye contact with him and the sad smile on his face, the apology written clear as day there, took your breath away. You felt a tear slide down your face and you turned around to quickly wipe it away.

When you turned back around, EZ had walked over and broken up the conversation. Angel finally turned around and saw you there. You could have swore you saw a quick flash of guilt cross his face before he walked over to you.

“Hey querida.” He kissed your forehead and pulled you into a hug.

Even with your confusion, heartbreak, and anger you couldn’t help completely folding into the hug. Your arms wrapped tightly around his waist and you found yourself inhaling his scent. “Hi.” You breathed out as you finally pulled back from the hug.

“Hey Y/N/N, what are you doing here?” EZ asked, giving you a one armed squeeze.

“I cooked dinner for y’all. There’s plenty inside. Even for your friend here.” You mentioned, with a nod in the woman’s direction. “Except maybe the mac and cheese if someone didn’t stop Coco and Gilly from being hogs.”

“Gracias,” Adelita told you before walking inside the clubhouse with EZ. You watched as Angel watched her for a second before dragging his eyes back to you. There was a silence between y’all before you broke it.

“Is she the reason?” You quietly asked Angel.

“What?”

You scrubbed your hands over your face, trying to hold yourself together. “Is she the reason? The reason you don’t call like you used to? Come around my place like you used to? Or put it on me hard like you used to do?”

“Y/N, it’s not like that.”

“I didn’t ask what it’s like. I asked if she’s the reason that my calls didn't reach you? The deepest of my love couldn’t please you? Tell me the truth right fucking now. I deserve to know.”

There was another silence between y’all as you just stared in his eyes. You were begging, practically pleading with him to tell you that you were wrong. You were putting too much on nothing. That there was no one else… “It wasn’t supposed to be like this.” Angel sighed, and you felt your heart drop into your stomach

“No..no, no, NO fucking dammit Angel!” You shoved him hard, your heartbreak manifesting as anger. “You promised me…”

He stumbled back a little at your push. “I’m so sorry Y/N. We were just working together, but something about her I-”

You cut him off with an angry hiss, “Shut up!” You didn’t want to hear all the things he found so wonderful about her. They didn’t matter. You just started pacing back and forth in front of him. You guys were lucky the yard was closed today and that EZ probably told everyone to stay inside and give y’all space. But honestly, you didn’t even care if you made a scene right now.

“You told me that before you stepped, you’d let me know. You promised you’d tell me if anything changed. You promised to be honest. You promised not to embarrass me. You promised, Angel, you promised…” Your voice broke as the full realization hit you. He’d been carrying out this affair for however long and he didn’t have the decency to tell you. You’ve been worried about him this whole time, but he’s been having himself a great time. You couldn’t stop the tears that flowed.

His eyes closed in guilt and sadness as you started to cry. He never wanted to hurt you. He just got into a situation that spiraled out of control. “Lo siento mucho cariño.” 

You just shook your head, unable to believe his words. Unable to believe what was happening. “Before you let me see you with her, you could have told me a change was gonna come. Told me something, anything...but no. How could you let it go this far if you had doubts that I wasn’t the one?”

“I didn’t have any doubts. It didn’t happen like that. I love you, but I just….I can’t explain it.”

“Love? You love me?” You repeated, your voice hoarse and breaking with the word. This wasn’t love. Love should never have so much confusion. Your mind was spinning and you needed to leave. Immediately. “I can’t do this.” You try to walk away but he grabs you.

“Y/N wait, please…” He pleaded, taking your hand and that physical contact caused you to snap.

“GET OFF ME!” You yelled at him, snatching your hand back. All thoughts of not making a scene left your mind. You were reacting from pure hurt. Your scream brought out the men from the clubhouse. “And don’t ever touch me again. We’re done, Angel. We’re so fucking over. You need to get your shit together, but I’m not gonna wait around until you do.”

And then you were rushing to your car and speeding out of the scrap yard. Angel tried his best to keep himself together even as he felt like his heart was beat out of his chest. He wanted to race after you but all he could do was watch you go. He felt someone step up beside him.

“I thought I told you not to be stupid, Angel.” Bishop told him, eyes still on the road your car sped down. He was pissed.

“Bish, I-” Angel started, but was interrupted by Bishop’s fist meeting his mouth. He fell to the ground, wiping at his busted lip.

“Just stay away from her.”

[loveisblindfanfictionbka]

Love Is Blind: Chapter Twenty-Four

“Robs, we got a meeting in five minutes,” Beverly stated as she stood beside Robyn’s desk.

“I know. I’m trying to find the vendor file for Albert’s. Question? Did you move some of my stuff off my desk while I was gone?”

“I unpacked that box that was delivered the day your boyfriend came by and moved some of your files to your inbox but that was it.”

“What was in the box anyway?”

“This,” Beverly pointed at a large marble figurine that was now sitting by her phone, “I left the card it came with in your top drawer. I’m surprised you didn’t notice it.”

“I’ve been on Zoom conference calls all day. I haven’t had time to look at my phone. It is beautiful though.”

“It is.”

“Did you read the card?”

“Thought about it but it seemed like a personal gift.”

“Well thank you for your restraint.”

Beverly laughed, “We need to get going to the meeting. I got paper copies of the presentation slides and of the vendor file, we’ll have to find the original later.”

“Works for me.”

Robyn grabbed her iPad and followed Beverly to the conference room.

“Just something for you to always remember me by and to brighten up your desk. Love you. Christopher.”

Robyn smiled as she read the words of the card. Chris got her a just-because gift. And it was expensive as hell, going by the price on the internet when she researched what the figurine was. It was a marble statue in the shape of two non-descript bodies, one male and one female, entwined with each other. She didn’t see one that looked exactly like the one Chris gave her so it seemed to be custom. She picked up her office phone and dialed a number. It rang for a few moments before she heard a voice, “Hello, Professor Brown speaking.”

“Professor Brown? I kind of like the sound of that.”

Chris laughed, “Hey Baby. What’s going on?”

“Nothing much. I just wanted to check on you. How are you?”

“I’m good. Getting back into the swing of things.”

“Regretting teaching for the summer yet?”

“Actually no. I got a pretty good set of students this summer. I’m happy about that.”

“That’s great but I wanted to thank you for my gift.”

“You finally opened the box?”

“The day you came over for lunch, I completely forgot about it. Bev unpacked it while we were in Pennsylvania. Why didn’t you say anything about it?”

“Because it was a gift, I didn’t want to assume you opened it already and then ruin the surprise.”

“I guess. Is it custom?”

“It’s one of a kind but I didn’t have it specially made. The artist doesn’t do mass production.”

“Well it’s beautiful. What made you pick that one?”

“It just seemed like something you would like. Was I right?”

“Very right. What you up to right now?”

“Just finishing up a lesson plan. Why?”

“You gonna be in your office for a while?”

“Maybe a few more hours. I got office hours this afternoon.”

“Cool.”

“What are you up to?”

“Nothing. Just wondering.”

“You sure?”

“I’m sure. Well I just wanted to thank you for my gift. I gotta finish up this proposal and take a nap.”

“You’ve been doing ok with working your normal hours?”

“As long as I sneak a nap in, I’m good.”

“Alright Baby. Finish your work and get some rest, I’ll see you at home.”

“Ok. Love you.”

“I love you too, Baby. Bye.”

“Bye.”

They hung up. Robyn glanced at the clock then looked down at the proposal on her desk, “that can wait until tomorrow.”

She logged into her computer system and pulled up the online order form for her favorite restaurant.

“Somehow I just knew you were gonna pull up on me,” Chris said as he opened his office door. He took the large cloth bag from Robyn’s hand as he leaned in to kiss her.

“I wasn’t going to but then I said what the hell, I haven’t seen your office yet.”

“You haven't?”

“Nope.”

“That’s crazy. I thought I brought you here before but regardless, I’m glad you’re here.”

“Me too. I needed to get out of the office.”

“Tough day.”

“Long day. I was gonna just take a nap and get back at it but I decided to just take the rest of the day off.”

“My couch is very comfy if you wanna stay and still take your nap.”

“I’m not trying to crowd your space, I just wanted to bring you something to eat for a change.”

“I like you in my space though.”

Robyn playfully rolled her eyes as she sat on the edge of his desk, “so what’s the lesson for the week?”

“We are working on basic scales on the piano. This is my beginner’s Piano class that I’m teaching this summer.”

“You teaching composition classes?”

“Not this summer. I didn’t want to teach anything too complex. Beginner’s Piano lets me relax a bit because if I don’t want to teach, teach, I can always give them practice notes and they can do that in lieu of class.”

“Ah, good thinking.”

“I have good ideas sometimes.”

Robyn chuckled, “so when are you gonna play for me again? It’s been a long time actually.”

“Well after lunch, I could take you to my classroom, I keep a keyboard in there for illustrations.”

“I’d love to.”

“Great. So we’ll eat, I take you around to see some stuff then we’ll go to my class.”

                                           ~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

“Dada!”

Chris pulled his attention from Robyn moving around the kitchen to Christian sitting on his lap. He carefully fixed his elongated curls and kissed his forehead, “what’s up, Baby Boy? Daddy not paying enough attention to you.”

Christian poked out his bottom lip and Chris chuckled, “your sister’s been teaching you a lot more than I thought.”

“Did he hit you with the pout?” Robyn asked with a laugh.

“He definitely did.”

“I took his teddy bear this morning and he did it to me. Isn’t it cute?”

“Yea until he realizes it’s power.”

Robyn laughed, “like Anesa has with you.”

Chris rolled his eyes, “whatever.”

“Our daughter has you wrapped around her finger and you know it.”

“She’s just like her mama.”

“I am not spoiled.”

“Yea. Right.”

“Well if I am spoiled, it’s your fault.”

“Whatever.”

Robyn chuckled, “you decide what you want for dinner?”

“Isn’t it a little early?”

“I’m in a cooking mood so I’d rather start while I feel like it.”

“I can cook dinner, Babe.”

“I know but I’m not asking you that. I’m asking what do you want to eat for dinner?”

Chris raised his brow at her and Robyn settled her hands on her hips as she tilted her head at him, “problem?”

“Nope.”

A big smile came over his face and Robyn’s brow furrowed in confusion, “why you smiling so wide?”

“Just realized something.”

“Something like?”

“I’ll tell you later.”

“Ok,” Robyn said softly, “you know what you want?”

“Oxtails.”

“Yellow rice or rice and peas?”

“Rice and peas.”

“Macaroni and cheese or cabbage?”

“Can you do both?”

“Yup. Dessert?”

“I’ll make it. What you thinking?”

“Apple pie with ice cream sounds good.”

“I can do that.”

“Good. I’ll get the oxtails started and in the crockpot so you’ll have your space for whatever you need to do.”

“Check and see if there’s any ingredients you need, me and the kids can go to the store for you.”

“I should be good. I did want to ask you something.��

“Anything, Baby. What’s up?”

“Do you have any friends?”

“Are you serious?”

“I’m very serious. I never hear about any or see you leave to hang out or anything.”

“I do have friends but we all have busy lives so we don’t get together as much. Also I did leave most of our friends behind in LA.”

“Do you ever regret leaving LA, separate from the divorce?”

“Honestly? No. We lived there for a long time so there’s not much I missed while living there. You?”

“I don’t know. I think we spent so much time together and traveling all over the place, LA was a home base but it wasn’t home, if that makes sense.”

“I get what you mean. You ever think about going back?”

“I’ve thought about going to visit but never actively made plans.”

“We should take the kids. Go to Disneyland, show them my other profession.”

“How is the firm doing?”

“It’s going well. I haven’t had any fires that needed to be put out so other than occasional conference calls regarding budgets and project approvals, I’ve been pretty hands off.”

“You ever thought about going back to being an architect?”

“I get the chance to still be a part of the industry being on the board so I don’t feel like I totally left in a sense.”

“Understandable.I also need to know if you’re going to my gala with me.”

“Of course. I’m your forever date, remember?”

“I don’t remember agreeing to that but ok.”

Chris shook his head with a laugh, “there you go being stubborn for no reason.”

Robyn laughed, “I’m just saying that I don’t remember saying that.”

“OK Wife.”

“Ok Boyfriend.”

Chris stuck his tongue out at her while he stood up with Christian in his arms, “I’m gonna put him down for his nap then I’ll be back to help cook. Don’t start without me, I need to see how you cook these”

“Oxtails are not difficult to make.”

“For someone who’s been making them most of their life, of course not.”

“Am I giving you a cooking lesson?”

“You could call it that.”

“I think you just want to be up under me.”

“Up under you and a whole lot more.”

“You lucky he’s still an infant and not repeating you just yet.”

“I got some time before we have to start speaking in code.”

“You’re silly.”

Chris left down the hall while Robyn began rummaging through the freezer.

“Ok, you can put the peppers in now,” Robyn instructed as she glanced over into the crockpot. Chris gathered a pile of chopped green pepper and dumped them into the vessel, “those aren’t chopped too big?”

“Nah, it’s gonna stew for a couple hours so they’ll break down. If we diced them to start with, they’ll disintegrate by time the food was done.”

“Oh, that makes sense.”

“So what exactly do you know how to cook?”

“Anything as long as I got the recipe.”

“You don’t cook from memory?”

“Some stuff, mainly stuff I’ve been eating the majority of my life but everything else, I need a recipe.”

“And here I was all impressed, thinking you were cooking from memory or something.”

“It was still good though.”

“It was but we’ll work on that part.”

“What part?”

“Learning to cook from the heart and not from a cookbook or Google search.”

“That sounds way easier than it is.”

“I think you’ll catch on quick. So earlier, what was that big smile all about?”

“What smile?”

“When I was asking you about what you wanted for dinner.”

“Just reminded me of when we were first married. You get pretty feisty once you get comfortable with someone.”

“I’ve always been comfortable with you.”

“No you haven't, especially since we were kind of pushed into the next step of the relationship before either of us were ready.”

“What you mean?”

“We had only been seriously dating for a few weeks then suddenly we’re moving in together. I’m sure that was not part of your plan at the time.”

“I honestly didn’t have a plan. You were the one ready to get married again.”

“Getting married again and having a baby are two totally different plans.”

“Another baby wasn’t in the plans?”

“Considering your age, I wasn’t exactly sure if you wanted to try for biological children, that’s why I never brought it up.”

“We never talked about kids?”

“No. Nesa asked you about it once but other than that, the discussion never came up. And that was before we were even dating.”

“We didn’t talk about a lot of stuff.”

“Not exactly my fault though.”

Robyn cut her eye at Chris and he shrugged his shoulders, “you had me walking on eggshells and you know it.”

“That was never my intention.”

“I know.”

“You know you could’ve broken up with me at some point.”

“That was never an option.”

“Why?”

“I trust you and your judgment, you know when you’re tripping and will adjust accordingly. It’d be stupid as hell to break up over something that’s easy to fix.”

“I guess.”

“Did you want to break up with me?”

“I didn’t even want to get back with you in the first place, remember?”

“Actually you did but you were afraid to, not the same thing.”

“Fear was the reason. Not dating was the action. You and your semantics again.”

Chris laughed as he grabbed a bottle of juice out of the fridge.

“What’s so funny?”

“You’re being feisty again.”

“You’re annoying.”

Chris chuckled as he walked over to her and leaned against the counter next to her. Robyn rolled her eyes as she placed the seasoned meat into the crockpot and put on the lid. She set it to high then turned to face Chris, “so what do you wanna do until dinner?”

“Let’s keep talking about this feisty attitude of yours.”

“I’d rather not,” Robyn pointed a wooden spoon in his direction, “and if that smirk turns into a laugh, I’ma pop you in the head with this spoon.”

“Now you’re threatening me? Oh, I should definitely start planning our wedding.”

“You get on my nerves.”

“And you love me.”

“You’re just a glutton for punishment.”

“Considering I dish it and don’t take it, I will disagree with that.”

“The lies.”

“I got some clips that say otherwise.”

“Shut up.”

Chris took a sip of his juice, “if you were to get married again, do you want a wedding or just a reception?”

“Neither. I’d rather just skip to the  honeymoon.”

“You wouldn’t want to celebrate?”

“Been there. Done that.”

“Wouldn’t hurt to make new memories though.”

“I just don’t want the theatrics. An uneventful proposal and marriage day works. Simple works just fine for me”

“Really?”

“Yea. What? You over there taking notes?”

“No, just asking questions.”

“I already know you’re gonna propose to me so you don’t have to play coy.”

“I’m not proposing tonight therefore I’m not playing coy.”

“Would you want a ceremony?”

“Something simple to mark the moment, yes.”

“Hmm…”

“Why you say it like that?”

“Just thinking. You wanna take a nap? The babies are still asleep.”

“Sure. Bedroom or couch?”

“Couch, it’s closer to the kitchen for when I gotta periodically check on the food.”

“Works for me.”

“When are you gonna make the pie?”

“About two hours or so before dinner, apple pie is better when it’s warm.”

“That’s true.”

“You gonna help me bake?”

“Considering my dessert resume only has pound cake on it, I’ll learn from you.”

Chris smiled then took another sip of juice.

“You and these damn smirks. What now?”

“Feisty then submissive. Just observing.”

“I am so over you right now.”

Robyn tossed the kitchen towel she was holding onto the counter and left out the kitchen with Chris’s laughter following her.

                                          ~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

“Chris, what are you doing here? I thought you had a class today,” Robyn said as she opened her office door. Chris held up a to-go bag from her favorite BBQ place and smiled, “I came to have lunch with my wife and today’s my free day, remember?”

“It definitely is. Well, this is nice. I was just thinking about you.”

“You were? About what?”

Robyn shrugged her shoulders as she grabbed napkins and plastic utensils from the basket underneath her coffee table. Chris sat down on the couch next to her as she handed him some wet wipes.

“Nothing specific. You just crossed my mind.”

“Should I be concerned?”

“Have you done something concerning?”

“No.”

“Then you don’t have to be concerned.”

Chris rolled his eyes and Robyn laughed, “forever the smart ass.”

“You asked. I answered. So what did you bring me to eat?”

“Chicken, hushpuppies and macaroni and cheese. Oh, and a Pepsi.”

“You are ruining my diet.”

“You aren’t on a diet.”

“Precisely my point, I can’t start with you feeding me like this.”

Chris laughed, “you don’t need to diet. As long as your doctor says you're healthy, the rest is welcomed to stay.”

“You just like my fat ass, you can say it.”

“You already did”

Robyn gasped and hit his arm, “you weren’t supposed to agree.”

“That ass is fat. I don’t know how you meant it but I know how I mean it and it’s perfect to me.”

“Whatever.”

“Do you really wanna lose weight or do you think I have a problem with your weight?”

“I don’t think you have a problem with my weight, considering how you always rubbing on my butt, hips and love handles, I’m getting the sense you’re enjoying it.”

Chris grinned at her and Robyn rolled her eyes, “but I’m still personally on the fence about it. I’m not as self-conscious but I’m still getting used to it.”

“Understandable. Well, since we’re talking about things you might still be on the fence about, I figured I’d get this question out of the way.”

“I know you are not proposing to me right now.”

“And if I was?”

“Chris, I am at work and sitting in front of you with Bbq sauce all over my hands and maybe on my face.”

Chris smiled as he used a napkin to wipe the corner of her mouth, “and you’ve never looked more beautiful to me.”

“This can’t be the moment. This is ghetto.”

Chris laughed, “This is not ghetto. This is real. This isn’t about having some spectacular story to tell because I think everything about our journey has been spectacular. I’ve always wanted to believe that you’d come back into my life and for seven years I was deathly afraid to but God and fate saw fit to bring you back to me in a manner that I never imagined. It gave us both clarity and allowed us to remedy a situation that honestly never ended, it just stopped. Robyn Rihanna Fenty Brown, I would be honored if you would be my wife again.”

“Oh my god, I need a napkin.”

Chris chuckled as he grabbed some wipes and gingerly wiped her hands, “better?”

“A little. I still think this is a bit unorthodox but...I’m completely ok with it.”

“Anything else you’re completely ok with?”

“I would absolutely love to marry you again.”

Chris grabbed her face and kissed her deeply before hugging her tightly, “I love you.”

“I love you too. Now where’s my ring?”

“I don't have it.”

“How you gonna propose with no ring?”

“I didn’t say I didn’t get a ring. I said I don’t have it, meaning it’s not on my person.”

“So where is it?”

“You got it.”

“How would I have it?”

Chris smirked and Robyn hit his shoulder, “Christopher. Stop playing.”

“I’m not playing. You have your ring.”

“I did pawn our last ring.”

“I know and I wouldn’t use that one even if you did still have it.”

“Chris, where is my ring?”

Chris wiped his hands then walked over to Robyn’s desk and grabbed the new marble art piece that was sitting beside her phone. Robyn’s brow furrowed as Chris brought it over to the coffee table. She became more confused as he turned it upside down and pulled out a silicone plug. He shook it lightly and something wrapped in a white cloth fell into the palm of his hand. He placed the silicone plug back then set the art piece down on the table before turning to face Robyn. He carefully unwrapped the white cloth and a large marquise shaped diamond set into a platinum band that was covered in smaller circular diamonds glistened in his hand.

“Your hand, please?”

Robyn shakingly put out her left hand and Chirs slipped the ring onto her ring finger, “Robyn Fenty Brown, will you marry me?”

She nodded her head as she wiped the tears from falling down her face, “Christopher, it’s so beautiful.”

“I did good, huh?”

“You did but how long was that ring in that piece?”

“Since the day I mailed it to you.”

“So what would’ve happened if you proposed somewhere, not my office?”

“That was never the plan.”

“You planned this? I am not even dressed up or nothing.”

“Because I wanted it to be about us, not fancy dinners and stuff, which there is nothing wrong with, but we’ve also done that already. I thought you would appreciate me not making a huge spectacle of it.”

“I do but I’m also a little caught off-guard.”

“You just knew I was gonna propose in front of the Empire State Building or something with fireworks, huh?”

“I was anticipating it.”

Chris laughed, “are you happy?”

“I am very happy.”

“Good.”

“We’re getting married again?”

“We’re getting married again.”

“EEK!” Robyn squealed as she jumped into his lap and kissed him, “I love you, Christopher.”

“I love you too.”

[96harmony96]

Chapter 14

The next morning dawned with an odd surreality. I made it to work, and then through most of my pre launch day in a kind of chilly fog. I couldn’t get warm enough, despite wearing a cardigan over my blouse and a scarf that didn’t match either one. It took me a few minutes longer to process requests than it should have, and I couldn’t shake a feeling of dread.

Lauren made no contact with me whatsoever.

Nothing on my smartphone or e-mail after my text last night. Nothing in my email inbox. No interoffice note.

The silence was excruciating. Especially when the day’s Google alert hit my inbox and I saw the photos and phone videos of me and Lauren in Bryant Park. Seeing how we looked together—the passion and need, the painful longing on our faces, and the gratefulness of reconciliation—was bittersweet.

Pain twisted in my chest. Lauren.

If we couldn’t work this out, would I ever stop thinking about her and wishing we had?

I struggled to pull myself together. Mark was meeting with Lauren today. Maybe that’s why Lauren hadn’t felt pressed to contact me. Or maybe she was just really busy. I knew she had to be, considering her business calendar. And as far as I knew, we still had plans to go to the gym after work. I exhaled in a rush and told myself that things would straighten out somehow. They just had to.

It was quarter to noon when my desk phone rang. Seeing from the readout that the call was coming from reception, I sighed with disappointment and answered.

“Hey, Camila,” Megumi said cheerily. “You have a Magdalene Perez here to see you.”

“Do I?” I stared at my monitor, confused and irritated. Had the Bryant Park photos lured Magdalene out from under whatever troll bridge she called home?

Regardless of the reason, I had no interest in talking to her. “Keep her up there for me, will you? I have to take care of something first.”

“Sure. I’ll tell her to have a seat.”

I hung up, then pulled out my smartphone and scrolled through the contact list until I found the number to Lauren’s office. I dialed and was relieved when Scott answered.

“Hey, Scott. Camila Cabello.”

“Hi, Camila. Would you like to speak to miss. Jauregui? she’s in a meeting at the moment, but I can buzz her.”

“No. No, don’t bother her.”

“It’s a standing order. she won’t mind.”

It soothed me immensely to hear that. “I hate to throw this in your lap, but I have a request for you.”

“Anything you need. That’s also a standing order.” The amusement in his voice relaxed me further.

“Magdalene Perez is down here on the twentieth floor. Frankly, the only thing she and I have in common is Lauren, and that’s not a good thing. If she has something to say, it’s your boss she should be talking to. Could you please have someone escort her up?”

“Absolutely. I’ll take care of it now.”

“Thanks, Scott. I appreciate you.”

“It’s my pleasure, Camila.”

I hung up the phone and sagged back in my seat, feeling better already and proud of myself for not letting jealousy get the better of me. While I still really hated the idea of her having any of Lauren’s time, I hadn’t lied when I’d said I trusted her. I believed she had strong, deep feelings for me. I just didn’t know if they were enough to override her survival instinct.

Megumi called me again.

“Oh my God,” she said, laughing. “You should’ve seen her face when whoever that was came to get her.”

“Good.” I grinned. “I figured she was up to no good. Is she gone, then?”

“Yep.”

“Thanks.” I crossed the narrow strip of hallway to Mark’s door and poked my head in to see if he wanted me to pick him up some lunch.

He frowned, thinking about it. “No, thanks. I’ll be too nervous to eat until after the presentation with Jauregui. By then whatever you pick up will be hours old.”

“How about a protein smoothie, then? It’ll give you some easy fuel until you can eat.”

“That’d be great.” His smile lit up his dark eyes. “Something that goes good with vodka, just to get me in the mood.”

“Anything you don’t like? Any allergies?”

“Nada.”

“Okay. See you in an hour.” I knew just the place to go. The deli I had in mind was a couple blocks up and offered smoothies, salads, and a variety of made-to-order paninis with quick service.

I headed downstairs and tried not to think about Lauren’s radio silence. I’d kind of expected to hear something after the Magdalene incident. Getting no reaction had me worrying all over again. I pushed out to the street through the revolving door and scarcely paid any attention to the man who climbed out of the back of a town car at the curb until he called my name.

Turning, I found myself facing Christopher Vidal.

“Oh…Hi,” I greeted him. “How are you?”

“Better, now that I’ve seen you. You look fantastic.”

“Thanks. I can say the same to you.”

As different as he was from Lauren, he was gorgeous in his own way with his mahogany waves, grayish-green eyes, and charming smile. He was dressed in loose-fitting jeans and a cream V-neck sweater, a very sexy look for him.

“Are you here to see your sister?” I asked.

“Yes, and you.”

“Me?”

“Heading to lunch? I’ll join you and explain.”

I was briefly reminded of Lauren’s warning to stay away from Christopher, but by now I figured she trusted me. Especially with her brother.

“I’m going to a deli up the street,” I said. “If you’re game.”

“Absolutely.”

We started walking.

“What did you want to see me about?” I asked, too curious to wait.

He reached into one of two large cargo pockets of his jeans and pulled out a formal invitation in a vellum envelope. “I came to invite you to a garden party we’re having at my parents’ estate on Sunday. A mix of business and pleasure. Many of the artists signed to Vidal Records will be there. I was thinking it’d be great networking for your roommate—he’s got the right look for music video.”

I brightened. “That would be wonderful!”

Christopher grinned and passed the invite over. “And you’ll both have fun. No one throws a party like my mother.”

I glanced briefly at the envelope in my hand. Why hadn’t Lauren said anything about the event?

“If you’re wondering why Lauren didn’t tell you about it,” he said, seemingly reading my mind, “it’s because she won’t come. she never does. Even though she’s the majority shareholder in the company, I think she finds the music industry and musicians too unpredictable for his tastes. By now, you know how she is.”

Dark and intense. Powerfully magnetic and hotly sexual. Yes, I knew how she was. And she preferred to know what she was getting into at all costs.

I gestured at the deli when we reached it, and we stepped inside and got in line.

“This place smells awesome,” Christopher said, his gaze on his phone as he typed out a quick text.

“The aroma delivers on its promise, trust me.”

He smiled a delightful boyish smile that I was sure knocked most women on their asses. “My parents are really looking forward to meeting you, Camila.”

“Oh?”

“Seeing the photos of you and Lauren over the last week has been a real surprise. A good surprise,” he qualified quickly when I winced. “It’s the first time we’ve seen her really into someone she’s dating.”

I sighed, thinking she wasn’t so into me right now. Had I made a terrible mistake by leaving her alone last night?

When we reached the counter, I ordered a grilled vegetable and cheese panini with two pomegranate smoothies, asking them to hold the one with a protein shot for thirty minutes so I could eat in. Christopher ordered the same, and we managed to find a table in the crowded deli.

We talked about work, laughing over both a recent baby food commercial faux-blooper that had gone viral and some backstage anecdotes about acts Christopher had worked with. The time passed swiftly, and when we parted ways at the entrance of the Crossfire, I said good-bye with genuine affection.

I headed up to the twentieth floor, and found Mark still at his desk. He offered me a quick smile despite his air of concentration.

“If you don’t really need me,” I said, “I think it’d be good for me to sit this presentation out.”

Although he tried to hide it, I saw the lightning quick flash of relief. It didn’t offend me. Stress was stress, and my volatile relationship with Lauren was something Mark didn’t need to think about while he was working on an important account.

“You’re golden, Camila. You know that?”

I smiled and set the drink carrier down in front of him. “Drink your smoothie. It’s really good, and the protein will keep you from feeling too hungry for a little bit longer. I’ll be at my desk if you need me.”

Before I put my purse in the drawer, I texted Cary to ask if he had plans on Sunday or if he’d like to go to a Vidal Records party. Then I got back to work. I’d started organizing Mark’s files on the server, tagging them and placing them in directories to make it easier for us to assemble portfolios on the fly.

When Mark left for the meeting with Lauren, my heartbeat quickened and a clutch of anticipation tightened my stomach. I couldn’t believe my excitement just from knowing what Lauren was doing at that particular moment, and that she’d have to think of me when she saw Mark. I hoped I’d hear from her after that. My mood picked up at the thought.

For the next hour, I was restless waiting to hear how things had gone. When Mark reappeared with a big grin and a spring in his step, I stood up in my cubicle and applauded him.

He took a gallant, exaggerated bow. “Thank you, Miss Camila.”

“I’m so stoked for you!”

“Jauregui asked me to give you this.” He handed me a sealed manila envelope. “Come to my office and I’ll give you all the deets.”

The envelope had weight and rattled. I knew from touch what I’d find inside before I opened it, but still the sight of my keys sliding out and into my palm hit me hard. Gasping with a pain more intense than any I could remember, I read the accompanying note card.

Thank you, Camila. For everything.

Yours, G

A Dear Jane brush-off. It had to be. Otherwise, she would’ve given me the keys after work on the way to the gym.

There was a dull roaring in my ears. I felt dizzy. Disoriented. I was frightened and agonized. Furious.

I was also at work.

Closing my eyes and clenching my fists, I pulled myself together and fought off the driving urge to go upstairs and call Lauren a coward. she probably saw me as a threat, someone who’d come in, unwanted and uninvited, and shook up her orderly world. Someone who’d demanded more from her than just his hot body and hefty bank account.

I shut my emotions behind a glass wall where I was aware of them waiting in the background, but I was able to get through the rest of my workday. By the time I clocked out and headed downstairs, I still hadn’t heard from Lauren. I was such an emotional disaster at that point I felt only a single, sharp twinge of despair as I exited the Crossfire.

I made it to the gym. I shut my brain off and ran full-bore on the treadmill, fleeing the anguish that would hit me soon enough. I ran until sweat coursed in rivulets down my face and body, and rubber legs forced me to stop.

Feeling battered and exhausted, I hit the showers. Then I called my mother and asked her to send Clancy to the gym to pick me up for our appointment with Dr. Petersen. As I put my work clothes back on, I mustered the energy to get through that last task before I could go home and collapse on my bed.

I waited for the town car at the curb, feeling separate and apart from the city teeming around me. When Clancy pulled up and hopped out to open the back door for me, I was startled to see my mom already inside. It was early yet. I’d expected to be driven solo to the apartment she shared with Stanton and wait on her twenty minutes or so. That was our usual routine.

“Hey, Mom,” I said wearily, settling on the seat beside her.

“How could you, Camila?” She was crying into a monogrammed handkerchief, her face beautiful even while reddened and wet with tears. “Why?”

Jolted out of my torment by her misery, I frowned and asked, “What did I do now?”

The new cell phone, if she’d somehow found about it, wouldn’t trigger this much drama. And it was too soon after the fact for her to know about my breakup with Lauren.

“You told Lauren Jauregui about…what happened to you.” Her lower lip trembled with distress.

My head jerked back in shock. How could she know that? My God…Had she bugged my new place? My purse…? “What?”

“Don’t act clueless!”

“How do you know I told her?” My voice was a pained whisper. “We just talked last night.”

“she went to see Richard about it today.”

I tried to picture Stanton’s face during that conversation. I couldn’t imagine my stepfather taking it well. “Why would she do that?”

“she wanted to know what’s been done to prevent information leaks. And she wanted to know where Nathan is—” She sobbed. “she wanted to know everything.”

My breath hissed out between my teeth. I wasn’t sure what Lauren’s motivation was, but the possibility that she’d dumped me over Nathan and was now making sure that she was safe from scandal hurt worse than anything. I twisted in pain, my spine arching away from the seatback. I’d thought it was her past that drove a wedge between us, but it made more sense that it was mine.

For once I was grateful for my mother’s self-absorption, which kept her from seeing how devastated I was.

“she had a right to know,” I managed in a voice so raw it sounded nothing like my own. “And she has a right to try and protect himself from any blowback.”

“You’ve never told any of your other boyfriends.”

“I’ve never dated anyone who makes national headlines by sneezing, either.” I stared out the car window at the traffic that boxed us in. “Lauren Jauregui and Cross Industries are global news, Mother. she’s light-years away from the guys I dated in college.”

She spoke more, but I didn’t hear her. I shut down for self-protection, cutting off the reality that was suddenly too painful to be endured.

Dr. Petersen’s office was exactly as I remembered. Decorated in soothing neutrals, it was both professional and comfortable. Dr. Petersen was the same—a handsome man with gray hair and gentle, intelligent blue eyes.

He welcomed us into his office with a wide smile, commenting on how lovely my mother looked and how like her I was. He said he was happy to see me again and that I looked well, but I could tell he spoke for my mother’s benefit. He was too trained an observer to miss the raging emotions I suppressed.

“So,” he began, settling into his chair across from the sofa my mother and I sat on. “What brings you both in today?”

I told him about the way my mom had been tracking my movements via my cell phone signal and how violated I felt. Mom told him about my interest in Krav Maga and how she took it as a sign that I wasn’t feeling safe. I told him about how they’d pretty much taken over Parker’s studio, which made me feel suffocated and claustrophobic. She told him I’d betrayed her trust by divulging deeply personal matters to strangers, which made her feel naked and painfully exposed.

Through it all, Dr. Petersen listened attentively, took notes and spoke rarely, until we’d purged everything.

Once we’d quieted, he asked, “Sinuhe, why didn’t you tell me about tracking Camila’s cell phone?”

The angle of her chin altered, a familiar defensive posture. “I didn’t see anything wrong with it. Many parents track their children through their cell phones.”

“Underage children,” I shot back. “I’m an adult. My personal time is exactly that.”

“If you were to envision yourself in her place, Sinuhe,” Dr. Petersen interjected, “would it be possible that you might feel as she does? What if you discovered someone was monitoring your movements without your knowledge or permission?”

“Not if the someone was my mother and I knew it gave her peace of mind,” she argued.

“And have you considered how your actions affect Camila’s peace of mind?” he queried gently. “Your need to protect her is understandable, but you should discuss the steps you wish to take openly with her. It’s important to gain her input—and expect cooperation only when she chooses to give it. You have to honor her prerogative to set limits that may not be as broad as you’d like them to be.”

My mother sputtered indignantly.

“Camila needs her boundaries, Sinuhe,” he continued, “and a sense of control over her own life. Those things were taken from her for a long time and we have to respect her right to establish them now in the manner that best suits her.”

“Oh.” My mother twisted her handkerchief around her fingers. “I hadn’t thought of it that way.”

I reached out for my mother’s hand when her lower lip trembled violently. “Nothing could’ve stopped me from talking to Lauren about my past. But I could have forewarned you. I’m sorry I didn’t think of it.”

“You’re much stronger than I ever was,” my mother said, “but I can’t help worrying.”

“My suggestion,” Dr. Petersen said, “would be for you to take some time, Sinuhe, and really think about what sorts of events and situations cause you anxiety. Then write them down.”

My mother nodded.

“When you have what will surely not be an exhaustive list but a strong start,” he went on, “you can sit down with Camila and discuss strategies for addressing those concerns—strategies you can both live with comfortably. For example, if not hearing from Camila for a few days troubles you, perhaps a text message or an e-mail will alleviate that.”

“Okay.”

“If you like, we can go over the list together.”

The back-and-forth between the two made me want to scream. It was insult to injury. I hadn’t expected Dr. Petersen to smack some sense into my mom, but I’d hoped he would at least take a harder line—God knew someone needed to, someone whose authority she respected.

When the hour ended and we were on our way out, I asked my mom to wait a moment so I could ask Dr. Petersen one last personal and private question.

“Yes, Camila?” He stood in front of me, looking infinitely patient and wise.

“I just wondered…” I paused, needing to swallow past a lump in my throat. “Is it possible for two abuse survivors to have a functional romantic relationship?”

“Absolutely.” His immediate, unequivocal answer forced the trapped air from my lungs.

I shook his hand. “Thank you.”

When I got home, I unlocked my door with the keys Lauren had returned to me and I went straight to my room, offering a lame wave to Cary, who was practicing yoga in the living room to a DVD.

I stripped off my clothes as I crossed the distance from my closed bedroom door to the bed, finally crawling between the cool sheets in just my underwear. I hugged a pillow and closed my eyes, so tired and drained I had nothing left.

The door opened at my back and a moment later Cary sat beside me.

He brushed my hair back from my tear-streaked face. “What’s the matter, baby girl?”

“I got kicked to the curb today. Courtesy of a fucking note card.”

He sighed. “You know the drill, Camila. she’s going to keep pushing you away, because she’s expecting you to fail her like everyone else has.”

“And I keep proving her right.” I recognized myself in the description Cary had just given. I ran when the going got tough, because I was so sure it was all going to end badly. The only control I had was to be the one who left, instead of the one who was left behind.

“Because you’re fighting to protect your own recovery.” He lay down and spooned against my back, wrapping one leanly muscular arm around me and tucking me tight against him.

I snuggled into the physical affection I hadn’t realized I needed. “she might’ve dumped me because of my past, not her.”

“If that’s true, it’s good it’s over. But I think you two will find each other eventually. At least I’m hoping you will.” His sigh was soft on my neck. “I want there to be happily-ever-afters for the fucked-up crowd. Show me the way, Camila honey. Make me believe.”

[sinsdaycorp]

Would u be willing to list below some of the avalance fanfics?

Sorry that it’s taken me so long to answer this, I haven’t been on a laptop in a long time so I haven’t had a chance to really look at my inbox… 

So, this has also given me a good reason to go through my bookmarks and reread some Avalance (:

Hope these recs are good!!

– –

Forever with No matter where you are (I’ll be there) - moonlitprincess

“She remembers the day Sara changed her name in Ava’s phone, remembers the way the late morning sunlight had streamed in through the windows and fallen on Sara’s bare back so that her skin was warm to the touch, remembered the way the sheets had bunched at Sara’s hips as she lay on her stomach, Ava’s phone in her hand and scrolling through contacts until she reached her own name.

“What are you doing?” Ava murmured, reaching out to trail her fingers lightly over Sara’s spine.

“Changing my name on your phone,” said Sara, locking the phone and tossing it back onto the pillow between them. “I’m now your little bird.”

Ava chuckled, leaning forward to press a kiss to Sara’s shoulder. “Why?”

“So if either of us ever get caught, you won’t get implicated as being associated with Sara Lance.””

OR

an avalance ocean’s 8 au.

– – 

Guns hidden under our petticoats - plinys.

Ava is certain that this is a joke, and if not, the worst possible assignment the Time Bureau has ever given out. The assignment of monitoring Sara Lance - future threat to all of time and history, and currently Starling City’s very own Black Canary - certainly isn’t what she had been hoping for when she’d been promoted, but Ava’s determined to stick to the non-interference rules and make the most of it. Though Sara has been known to throw a wrench into many people’s carefully made plans.

– –

A million miles away - plinys.

Sara upgrades her phone to the latest OS - meant to be innovative enough to seem nearly human - and finds herself falling for the voice that’s always in her ear.

(A Her. AU)

– –

Forever with your hands in my pockets - plinys.

“If only there was something I could do to help my grade,” Sara says, her voice sugary sweet, “I’d do just about anything?”

“Well, you could start by doing your homework.”

(Or: Sara’s five step plan to seduce her political statistics TA into giving her a good grade.)

– –

Summer slipped us underneath her tongue - plinys

“Wait, you didn’t think that I wore my Bureau suit around the house, did you?”

– –

Silence - plinys.

“We should play a game,” Sara insists.

“How about the silent game,” Ava suggests.

– –

BASICALLY ANYTHING BY PLINYS!!! 

– –

Don’t you like you, cause I like you - CoffeeAndArrows, moonlitprincess

But before Ava can turn to run away from the door, it swings open to reveal Sara Lance standing in front of her. Her hair is bundled into a messy bun on the top of her head, two stray strands framing the sides of her face. She’s wearing a SCHS soccer hoodie and skin tight shorts that only come halfway down her thighs, revealing muscly, freckled legs that Ava has to work very hard not to look at. Her feet are adorned with grey fluffy socks which Ava is avoiding calling adorable in her head in fear of starting to associate Sara with any word remotely cutesy and affectionate.

Sara’s expression is genuinely surprised for several moments, eyes wide and startling blue. Her lack of makeup and the dim, golden light of the corridor highlight the freckles that are littered across her face.

Her eyelashes are really blonde, thinks Ava. How did I never know her eyelashes were blonde?

OR

a high school au in which sara and ava have been each other’s arch nemesis since freshman year, but when ava’s parents react badly to her coming out, it’s sara’s doorstep that ava shows up on when she doesn’t know what to do.

– –

The day before you came - Phoebmonster

“So, the brief is …” She tapped her fingers on the wheel. “Make your Mom believe you’re really gay and give you some peace and quiet next year.”

Ava nodded, and Sara grinned.

“Right, I can do that.” She said, more to herself than anything.

aka the ‘i’ve hired you to pretend to be my partner to annoy my family at christmas but i think i’m really falling for you’ AU that Absolutely no one asked for.

– –

Cause I see sparks fly (whenever you smile) - mrsavalance.

“Excuse me, one of the flight attendants said that this seat was still free. Is that correct?” You are frozen in place when you find Sara Lance staring at you with those piercing blue eyes. You cannot help but stare at them. They seem to appear to be even bluer now that she is standing right in front of you, than they are on screen. You quickly avert your gaze to the empty seat next to you, which you had placed your bag upon as soon as you figured out that no one was going to sit there, and if she noticed you staring, she doesn’t comment on it at all, which you are immensely grateful for.

or

The Avalance celebrity au, nobody asked for.

– –

i just wanna spend the nights with you - moonlitprincess.

based on a tumblr ask: “i had been on a few casual dates with this girl and we went back to my place yesterday and we were gonna y’know…fuck for the first time. anyway she takes off her shirt and it turns out she has a six pack (an honest to god could grate cheese on it six pack) and i was so surprised/turned on that i couldn’t breathe and passed out, hit my head and she had to drive me to the er. i have 4 stitches. she’s probably never gonna call me again lmao”

OR

college au where ava is only MILDLY crushing on campus heartthrob sara lance and can totally 100% be chill with a casual hookup … until she realises sara has abs. (ft. our favourite ladies being useless gay disasters & plenty of unexpected feelings)

– –

The One With the Bet - WardenRoot.

Ava loses a bet to Sara, the terms of which states that the loser has to do whatever the winner says

– –

Scars - WardenRoot.

Ava sees Sara’s scars for the first time

– –

What if I’n weak and I need you tonight - WardenRoot.

Ava finds Sara crying in her room after a not so successful mission and tries to comfort her.

– –

Will You Be My (Fake) Wife? - WardenRoot.

“So what you need from us is a date?”“A fake spouse, yes.”

When an object from the future gets displaced, Ava needs the help of the Legends to go undercover and retrieve it

– –

So, I guess I’m trying to say, anything by WardenRoot also? 

– –

Sweet Girl - TML9115

Sara is turned into a five year old. The legends with the help of Gary convince Ava to watch her.

– –

More than a Clone - StoryChanger

Ava is attacked in her own apartment and barely escapes to the Waverider. Sara and her team work together to figure out why she was attacked and discover that someone close to Ava maybe a traitor.

– – 

The Holiday Party - ffgirl21

In a last ditch effort to help Sara get over her recent breakup, Laurel drags Sara to her law firm’s Thanksgiving party where she runs into Ava Sharpe, a corporate lawyer at Laurel’s firm.

– – 

Nailing The Canary - notthegoblin

Ava Sharpe is a spy tasked with capturing the elusive Canary. Can she keep focused on her mission when Sara Lance catches her eye?

– –

A Special Kind of Real Fake Love - karadanverz

In order to catch a time-traveler that’s trying to erase the Time Bureau from existence, Ava and Sara must go undercover at a couples retreat for a week so that they can catch him.

– –

Camp Waverider - Notabeautifullittlefool

The summer camp AU that I was literally the only one to ask for.

– –

all these roads lead back to you - Phoebmonster

She could feel it now, something that wasn’t there before, clear and mysterious like the pools of water in the caves, sat at the edge of her mind. If she just reached out -

(An artefact gives Sara and Ava the ability to read eachother’s minds. it goes about as well as you would expect.)

– –

So, I went through all my bookmarks and took out a lot of options from this list because they weren’t all complete. 

I hope you enjoy these fics, because I surely did! 

Also, if you have a twitter, there’s A LOT of SMAU’s on there that have me in stitches.

– –

https://twitter.com/jesmacalIans/status/1124792102557290498?s=20

– –

https://twitter.com/saviourxsara/status/1111513658209624065?s=20

– –

https://twitter.com/katlikescats_/status/1122598940162052097?s=20

– –

https://twitter.com/Iegendsofau/status/1038175307839225856?s=20

– –

https://twitter.com/plinys/status/1079173574781530114?s=20

– –

https://twitter.com/katlikescats_/status/1080932001941766144?s=20

– –

https://twitter.com/mrsavalance/status/1092893264473194498?s=20

– –

https://twitter.com/jesmacalIans/status/1080450697915781120?s=20

– –

https://twitter.com/jesmacalIans/status/1088810889632010240?s=20

– –

Hope you enjoy each and every one of these as much as I did. 

[lihikainanea]

Tiger and Bill getting quarantined together and she is getting restless.

ok ok ok ok ok

but like

FIRST OF ALL.

I just want to say that I hope each and every one of you are alright. If you’re quarantined, I know that it’s hard, and I know that it’s very hard on your mental health. I’m here for you guys if you need it. I suck at replying on time and this whole zombie virus thing has got me quite busy, but my inbox is always open. And I won’t turn off my anon option because I want all of you to feel like you have at least one safe space left, if you need to unleash your sorrows or a rant or both. It’s fucking hard on me too, I mentioned before but I’m an empath to an insane degree and the entire world buzzing with panic, anxiety, sickness and negative energy just has me like...well, it literally has me breaking out in hives. I get stress-induced eczema and my hands are a fucking mess because of it and also because I’m washing them like 800 times a day. Somebody come rub coconut oil on them for me :-(

Approach slowly though. Don’t spook me. I frighten easily and I really am like a puffer fish--except instead of swelling up, if you spook me I just break out in nervous hives and start scratching.

ANYWAY

Look, let’s add some angsty sauce to this: Bill desperately trying to get home to her as the quarantine is taking effect. It’s like he’s in quicksand, he just wants to get home so he can be with her because he knows she’s stressed and anxious about it, but he’s been booked on 4 commercial flights so far and all of them just keep getting cancelled. He’s spending hours on hold with airlines, spending even longer stranded in airports pleading with the desk agents, and every time he looks up at the TV, another border is closed. He hasn’t slept in days. Every time he talks to tiger he’s trying to be soothing, reassuring, but he knows that she can see his worry too.

“It looks bad, bud,” she murmurs on a FaceTime call, and he can see her hand moving beneath the screen.

“Stop scratching,” he sighs, “It is bad, kid. But I’ll get to you, I promise.”

But her face drops, and she looks sad all of a sudden.

“You shouldn’t make a promise like that, Bill,” she mumbles, “You might not be able--”

“Tiger,” he interrupts, “I’ll see you soon. Hang in there. And go get the coconut oil in the cupboard.”

If anything, seeing her worry and her sadness just made him all the more determined. And hell maybe borders are closed now. Maybe commercial flights are cancelled. But the rich--they live on another fucking planet. And maybe this was some big budget film, maybe he was with his bro (awwwww, Northman vibes) and their actor’s union put the pressure on--so the studio paid for a charter to get the two tall boys the fuck out. That, and probably a little sprinklin’ of Granny’s magic. Granny is probably watching tiger from above and scowling at Bill, going boy you better GET HOME to this mess and take care of it. She’s your mess now and you promised.

And it’s probably like, anything less than glamorous. Maybe Bill has legit slept at the airport the past few days, waiting on standby, trying to get out. He probably hasn’t showered in awhile, that glorious scruff covering his face. But he calls tiger to tell her that he got a miracle, and tiger is happy but she doesn’t want to believe it until he’s home and until he walks through that door.

But he does. Hours later, looking like he’s been through hell, he does. But he comes in to a mess--tiger literally stress-ate all of her quarantine snacks so she’s hopped up on gummy bears and cheese sticks. She’s also covered in hives, and he busts through the door to see the poor thing curled up on the couch, scratching her red, swollen hand, a stick of half-eaten licorice in her mouth, surprised as all hell to see him. Bill takes a moment, breathes, just tries to decide what to tackle first.

“Okay,” he says calmly, “Okay....”

Tiger hops up, the licorice falls to the floor, and she takes a running leap at him but he holds his arms up and backs away.

“No, no no,” he says, “I need to wash my hands, first.”

So he steps away, but then he steps back. Gives her a slow once over. She’s literally covered in hives--her face, her hands, her neck. Angry, red patches.

“We're gonna....” he waves his hand dismissively up and down in front of her, “We’re gonna figure this out, kid.”

“Figure what out?” she grumbles.

“Why you look like a spotted fucking leopard now,” he retorts, “Come on, let’s get in the tub.”

“I can’t,” she says, and then she stands there like a pigeon as she lifts one foot, uses it to scratch the back of her calf.

“Why not?”

She shifts her eyes, lifts her hand to scratch at her neck but Bill smacks it away.

“It makes me itchier,” she mumbles. He rolls his eyes.

“Just follow me,” he grumbles. And after he washes his hands a few times, he sits her up on the counter as he runs to fetch some oatmeal. He runs a lukewarm bath and pours some in, and climbs in with her. You can bet that after he just tuts her gently, rubbing some coconut oil all over her to help soothe it as he scolds her gently and lovingly.

“Look at you, kid,” he coos, “God it’s like a game of connect the dots.”

“Bill,” she whines, “I was worried about you, bud.”

He smiles at that, his soft, shy smile, kisses her cheek before he folds her into his arms.

“I know you were, tiger,” he murmurs. And just because I find it such a cute image--coconut oil can kind of clog your pores, so when it comes to the angry little patches of red on her face, maybe Bill grabs the calamine lotion. Dots that on her face instead, so now she’s just this cute, scowling little mess full of bright pink cotton-ball splotches on her face.

The two weeks are probably hard but let’s face it, it’s so much easier together. Tiger literally stress-ate everything in the house so Bill has to put in a huge order of groceries online. They spend lazy mornings in bed, they cook up a storm every day. There’s a lot of sex--god so much sex. And tiger makes it a rule that Bill is not allowed to wear clothes for two straight weeks--only those incredible little tight boxer briefs that just make his legs look so long and his hips look so fucking delicious.

[katydidsomething]

Adrinette April Day 20: Photoshoot

(Read on AO3)

Marinette is surprisingly calm among all the people rushing around the set. She had thought she’d be a nervous wreck during the first big photoshoot for her upcoming clothing line release, but after experiencing the hell that is Paris Fashion Week, she feels like this isn’t too bad.

Of course, it probably helps that Adrien is here with her. She’d been nervous about asking him to join in on the shoot, but he had been overjoyed to be a part of her first-ever solo line. Marinette had just wanted him there as an extra set of experienced eyes, but he had volunteered himself as a model, and she really couldn’t be happier.

The photographer appears next to her, breaking her out of her reverie.

“Mme. Dupain-Cheng, it seems that we are ready to start.”

“Please, call me Marinette. And if everything’s ready, let’s go!” She smiles as she takes her place to the side of the set, ready to make adjustments to the clothes if needed. They’re starting with the women’s collection, so she assumes that Adrien is still in the makeshift dressing room behind her.

Everything goes even more smoothly than she could have hoped for, and before she knows it they’re done with the female models. The set becomes a flurry of activity again as everyone prepares for the men’s collection, and Marinette catches a glimpse of blond hair out of the corner of her eye.

Adrien emerges from the dressing room in a dark blue tailored suit with a classic silhouette, but she knows that the lining of the coat has some Marinette flair. He catches her eye and reaches out for her hand, quickly closing the distance between them.

Pressing a quick kiss to her cheek, he asks, “How is everything going so far?”

She smiles widely. “Fantastic. It’s kind of surreal, seeing my designs on so many different people.” She squeezes his hand before releasing it to fuss with the collar of his shirt.

“You’ve worked so hard for this, my lady. You deserve for everything to go perfectly.” He places his hands gently on her shoulders and is about to lean in for a kiss when the photographer calls for him.

“That’s my cue!” He winks before going to take his place on set. They do a few group shots with all the male models before switching to individuals. Adrien is slated to go last, so he waits by Marinette’s side once he’s shooed off the set.

She’s grateful to have him with her, encouraging her to step in and suggest different poses or adjustments to the lighting. When he steps back in to do his solo shots, she misses the security of his presence beside her.

Marinette can’t help but admire how easily he poses for the camera. He looks so natural under the harsh lights, and he follows the photographer’s direction with practiced ease. Watching him here, she remembers how she used to obsess over his photos in magazines and advertisements, and she can’t really blame her teenaged self for falling in love with him.

“Marinette!” Adrien calls from the set, beckoning her over to where he is standing.

She quirks an eyebrow at him, curious, before joining him in front of the backdrop. He wraps one arm around her, pulling her close into his side, before whispering into her ear. “Say cheese!”

Before she can react, the flash goes off, startling her.

“What are you doing?” she laughs, trying to extricate herself from his embrace.

“Didn’t you say you wanted some photos that incorporated both the men’s and women’s collection?” He smiles at her as he shifts them to face more toward the camera. “I noticed that you were wearing something from the line, so why not take the opportunity?”

She tries to convince him to get one of the other models to join him instead of her, but Adrien is nothing if not insistent. They pose together for a few minutes before she finally manages to escape back to the sidelines, but she knows that she can’t hide her smile from him.

A few days later, when the preliminary edits from the photographer arrive in her inbox, she’s pleasantly surprised with how the photos of her and Adrien turned out. She thought she would look as awkward as she felt, but Adrien must have shared some of his model magic with her.

Adrien peeks his head around the office door, presumably to ask her something, but stops short when he sees her changing her background to a photo of them laughing together, arms wrapped around each other’s waists.

“Didn’t I tell you they’d turn out well?” he asks as he comes up behind her. He presses his lips to the top of her head before taking the mouse from her hand to scroll through the rest of the proofs.

Marinette rolls her eyes. “I suppose there are a few nice pictures of the two of us in there.” Reaching up to ruffle his hair teasingly, she stands up from the desk. Adrien wraps his arms around her, pressing a gentle kiss to her forehead, and then her lips.

“We make a pretty good-looking pair, don’t we?” His eyes sparkle mischievously, just like when he used to flirt with her from behind the mask, and she can’t help but bop him on the nose.

“I guess we do, kitty.”

[sariahsue]

The Open Line - Chapter Nine, Claws and Bugs

Ladybug knows that if it weren’t for Adrien, she would have fallen for Cat Noir, hard and fast. And when Oblivio takes her memory, she does just that. Able to keep her memory after the Oblivio incident but still unaware of Cat Noir’s real identity, Ladybug must deal with her growing feelings for her partner, who is desperately trying to win her over. (Rated PG.)

Read Chapter One Here Reach Chapter Eight Here

***

Adrien was normally quick to hop out of bed in the morning, eager for school and to see his friends, but today he laid in bed for nearly twenty minutes, staring at the picture Ladybug had sent him. (He'd printed it and kept it under his pillow all night. Plagg had made fun of him.) Adrien was determined to have it memorized by the time he left for school.

Ladybug had made sure to hide personal details and belongings from view. There were no hints to her identity, but she hadn't been able to hide the pink wall she'd taped the picture to. Pink. Her room was painted pink. Was that her favorite color? Should he get her pink flowers? She also hadn't hidden her pink bedspread. Her bed! Not only had she hung up his picture, but she'd put it next to her BED. Was it the first thing she saw that morning? Had she been staring at it as she'd fallen asleep last night?

A loud knock on the door gave him a half-second warning to hide the picture under his blanket before Nathalie came marching in. She didn't even look at him before she began listing off his schedule for the day, which was packed. "Your father expects you downstairs promptly. You both will be very busy today, and he doesn't want any delays."

"Yes, Nathalie. I'll be right down." As soon as she left the room, he lunged for the photo. Breakfast could wait, so he sank into his pillows and forgot about Nathalie and her schedules, holding the photo high above his head this time, to get a new angle.

There was light shining directly onto Ladybug's bedroom wall, though he couldn't see its source. That probably meant she had a lamp close by. Did she read before falling asleep? What was her favorite book?

The best part of her message last night was definitely the caption she'd added. "Got to have a picture of my favorite partner on display!" It was silly. It shouldn't make him so happy. He was her only partner, but he had never been called anyone's favorite anything before. He repeated her words to himself as he finally got ready for the day.

He skipped down the stairs, ten minutes late for breakfast, only to be greeted by a scowl.

"Did Nathalie tell you I expected your punctuality?" his father asked. Even from Gabriel's spot at the far end of the table, Adrien could feel the open disappointment, almost anger. But Ladybug's words kept him insulated and safe.

"Yes," Adrien said. "But I didn't know-"

"And you chose to disrespect her direction and my time because?"

"Uh..." Because Ladybug said he was her favorite! She didn't push him away when he kissed her! "I guess I was... tired?"

"I see," Gabriel said, picking up his plate has he rose from the table. "I had hoped to spend some time with my son, but as he places such a low value on me, I will be finishing my meal in my office." Gabriel swept past him and was gone.

"If he'd told me he was going to be here..."

"His loss," Plagg said from his pocket. "Hey, we could always go back to bed. I think there's a certain wheel of cheese calling my name and a certain picture calling yours."

"Nice try." Adrien grabbed his plate and walked toward the front door. It was odd, how bad he didn't feel about his father's behavior. It was unfortunate, but it couldn't damage his good mood. He was Ladybug's favorite! She'd let him kiss her hand like six times last night!

Remembering that got him through a grueling day. Nathalie hadn't been exaggerating when she said he'd be busy. School was full of tests and Chloe's drama, all made harder by his sleep deprivation. Double fencing left him exhausted. Then there was a photoshoot. And finally, piano lessons, where he was berated for his "obvious lack of practice and respect for the piano as an instrument and an art form."

"I'd like to see him work in practicing around all the akumas I have to fight."

"Or all the daydreaming about Ladybug," Plagg added. It was amazing how much of Adrien's pillow he was taking up. Plagg was spread out, basking in a square of sunshine. One eye was cracked open, so he could see what kind of effect his teasing had.

"I'm not that bad."

"You sure?"

"Scoot over." Adrien flopped face-first onto his bed, already reaching for the photo. It was a relief to have his room to himself again. He was nearing his physical limits, and he had past his people limit a long time ago. Well, people that weren't Ladybug. He wished there was a patrol scheduled tonight. Having pictures of her was nice, but nothing could compare to the comfort of her presence.

The door swung open, and Plagg dove out of sight while Adrien scrambled to his feet to face his visitor. Seeing Gabriel twice on the same day was a rare occurrence, and normally Adrien would have been glad for the attention, but his father's face was even more sour than it had been that morning.

"The photographer sent me the raw images of today's shoot, Adrien. Your work was subpar."

Adrien's mouth twitched. He did not have the energy for this. "It's just the raws," Adrien said. "They're going to Photoshop it anyway."

"You can't airbrush failure. Your performance was unacceptable."

"Maybe it shouldn't have been scheduled after two hours of fencing, then. I was tired." His words hung in the air between them, but Adrien wouldn't have taken them back even if he could have. He was too tired. Too tired of being pushed around today, too tired of being everyone's disappointment.

"You will not be practicing with your band on Saturday."

"But they're counting on me to be there! I've missed the last four-"

Gabriel steamrolled over him. "You will be spending your newly freed time to practice your piano. I met your teacher on his way out, and he tells me your skill is quickly deteriorating."

Adrien folded his arms and looked away.

"I can see this is getting too much for you," Gabriel said softly.

Adrien dared to hope that his father was finally understanding him, that he would be removing some of his burdensome lessons or shoots, but he should have known better. It made Gabriel's next words cut deeper.

"If your performance – and your attitude – do not improve, we will be returning to homeschooling."

Even as he left the room, it felt like Gabriel's claws closed in around Adrien. No band on Saturday. That was expected. It seemed like his father would use any excuse to keep him from going. But no school? The last time he'd threatened that had been ages ago. And if he were being monitored by a tutor at home all day, it would be so much harder to slip away if an akuma attacked. No band, no school, no Cat Noir.

Adrien threw himself on the piano bench in frustration and started playing. Let his father hear him practice. Let him think that his son was cooperative and submissive.

"Ah, don't worry," Plagg said, floating over. He'd retrieved Ladybug's picture from underneath the pillow, and it dangled between his paws. "He'll forget about everything in a few days. Just watch." He set the photo on top of Adrien's music.

"Just let me play," Adrien said, shifting the picture aside to see the music. "I want him to think he's won." Plagg was trying to be helpful, and he appreciated the gesture, but he needed to see the real thing. A photo wasn't enough anymore.

"Why?"

"So he won't check on me again." Don't think. Just play. Then see Ladybug.

Don't feel.

This plan only lasted fifteen minutes until Adrien couldn't stand to be in his own house any longer. It would have to be enough. He was jumping through the window before he'd even finished transforming, into the first truly cold night of October. The city was misty and dreary, which didn't match his mood. He wanted a thunderstorm.

Sixteen blocks away from his house, he finally stopped to contact Ladybug. It rang, and rang and rang, until it went to her inbox. Even though he knew there was no point, that she wasn't transformed, he tried again. And again. The weather turned menacing.

When he finally gave up - without leaving a message - he wasn't sure what to do next. There was nowhere he could really go. There was no one who really wanted him around. So he wandered, buffeted by the wind and getting soaked to the bone, trying not to remind himself that because he was Ladybug's only partner, he was also her least favorite.

"She never said that," he told himself firmly. "That wasn't what she meant." Alone and abandoned in the rain, it was hard to believe he'd had a reason to be happy that morning.

Water and wind eventually drove him to find shelter. The Notre Dame was big enough to hide him, tall enough that he wouldn't be able to hear the people and cars below him. The enormous roof was made out of wood and had many eaves and ledges he where he could sit and be alone, but when he sat down, he found that the spot was already taken.

"Figures," he said. A swarm of ladybugs huddled there for warmth. "You're not the one I want right now." He settled down anyway and stayed there, unmoving, for he didn't know how long. Long enough that tourists returned to their hotels and street lights flickered on. Long enough for the bugs to realize he was a much better heat source than the wooden rafters and start to crawl over him instead. His only friends.

"It's a sign," he said, looking down at himself. "Soon she'll want me just as much as you all do."

"Who are you talking to?"

"Ladybug!" She'd come! And just like that, his heart hurt a little less. "Would you like to meet my friends?" He motioned to the little insects crawling over his knees.

Droplets of water hit his legs as she wrung out her hair. "They can't get enough of you," she noted, sitting down next to him. The ledge was wide and sheltered from the wind, just big enough for the both of them.

"So you were jealous and came to get a piece of the action?"

"Ha. Funny. I checked the Ladyblog a few minutes ago and saw reports that you've been up here for hours, sulking."

"Oh, uh..." Should he tell her? Should he try to cover it up? Play it off? He didn't want her to think he couldn't handle something as stupid as a bad day. She would be disappointed in him too, just like everyone else, and he would do anything to avoid that.

But Ladybug saw through his hesitation. "Your dad again?"

Cat Noir sighed and then nodded. "Today's been kind of awful." It was a relief to tell the truth. And an even bigger relief that he didn't have to say it himself.

"I'm sorry," she said, leaning against him, lending him her support with her presence.

They didn't talk much. Ladybug brushed bugs off his shoulders and hands, and stroked his hair whenever she thought he needed a distraction from the gloom that waited for him beyond their island of tranquility.

"I wish I'd gotten here sooner," she said over an hour later. "We're partners. I hate the idea of you facing tough stuff by yourself, even if it's not an akuma."

"You could always give me your number, Bugaboo," he joked. "I tried calling your yoyo earlier, but you weren't transformed."

He expected an eye roll and a lecture on keeping civilian and super lives separate, so he wasn't quite sure what to make of it when she looped her arm through his and hummed thoughtfully. Was she actually considering it? He'd said it as a joke!

But she lapsed back into silence without really answering, and the hope her reaction had ignited was quickly extinguished in the gloom that engulfed the rest of the city. Of course she wasn't going to give him her number. She was more willing to spend time with him, more generous with her touches because she knew he was upset, but that was it. There was no indication that it would ever be more than that, and he shouldn't get his hopes up.

They spent another half hour in silence, until Ladybug got up with a grimace. "We can't stay out late two nights in a row."

"Yeah, I should get back. Before someone misses me." Miss him? Ha. Like that would happen.

"I have an idea," she said, holding a hand out to help him up. "And I think you'll really like it."

"What's that?" Once on his feet, Cat Noir didn't let her hand go. Neither, he noticed, did she.

"I'll tell you tomorrow, if I can figure out the details."

"We don't have patrol tomorrow, though."

"Oh, well, we could- that is..."

She paused and looked shyly away, and Cat Noir felt his feeble hope burn back to life. This was something new. Scheduling to meet up outside of patrols? It was unprecedented. It couldn't be...

"Would you meet me anyway?"

"Of course, LB. I would love to."

"Ten at the Tower?"

"Sure."

It was happening. It was honestly, truly happening. They were planning to meet, not because the city needed them, or because he was having a bad day, or on accident. Just because she wanted to spend time with him.

Ladybug beamed, then pushed herself up on her toes and kissed his cheek before saying in a rush, "Hope you feel better. See you tomorrow. Bye!"

As soon as she was out of sight, Cat Noir did a little dance on the ledge. But the ledge wasn't big enough, and on his second pirouette, he lost his balance and fell off. Laughing, he waited until the very last second to save himself, but even that rush couldn't compare to the high his Lady had just given him.

Read Chapter Ten Here

***

Author's note: This story is officially a "Notre Dame Cathedral Didn't Burn Down" AU. I'm a writer. I can make reality whatever I want, and I want that building to not have burned.

I had a lot of obstacles to getting this chapter done for tonight, and I wasn't sure I was going to be able to. I had to push myself to get this done in time, but I'm happy that I did! Next week, back to Marinette. Let's see what SHE makes out of her own behavior!

[sevenincubistolemyheart]

Hi guys-

So as you can tell from my inactivity school, work and unfortunately now bouts of depression has been kicking my ass lately. I have been seeing yall's asks but I could respond between work and Thanksgiving but I will soon- hopefully tomorrow.

Thank you Yellow Heart anon and that lovely ranty ask I got about Tainting Purity y'all both made me smile.

Truth is much as I adore Tainting Purity and Black Ties, White Lies I've been trying to force my inspiration and that just makes me discouraged and anxious as fuck so...I may be putting out some other projects and (finally) updating the 'I like my men like I like my...' series.

Theory talk and talking about them is fine but I'm literally begging you guys to not ask when I'm updating next- especially if that's all you say (this goes especially for Tainting Purity since I get them pretty frequently now).

It just...wrecks my already low motivation to shreds and makes me not even wanna look at my inbox.

Anyway- I'm sorry guys. I feel like shit, really. I've got a few lines for TP- ideas galore but I just can't find the mental energy or right mindset to put them into words and Black Ties, White Lies is...honestly a bit too real for me right now.

That being said- Tainting Purity and Black Ties, White Lies will be on a brief hiatus through December. I say hiatus loosely since my inspiration typically hits very fast and very hard out of the blue so who knows if I may bang out one of them during the break. But don't expect any main content; just AMM. I thank you in advance for your patience guys!

In other news- potential projects to hopefully pique your interest(do let me know if there's any y'all are really looking forward to- I'll try and prioritize them depending on how I'm feeling)

A Scream AU- This will be based on the movie- because I've been plunged back into the fandom after binging the whole series. I'm unsure if I'll be being a faithful adaptation or not- in either case I hope to keep you on your toes. I'd like for it to be a oneshot- but we'll see if I get deep into charachter quirks and motivations to maybe make it up to a 2 or 3 shot. This is all up in the air though.

Halloween Fic- I dunno if you guys still want this one but I started a fic where basically you claim to not get scared easily but your best friend and his friends(who work at a haunted house attraction) set it up for you in an attempt to give you the scare of a lifetime.

It has a lot of my personal fears(mainly arachnophobia, being vulnerable, and yes- Scream the movie) (Don't judge me okay-it makes sense once you see the ending.) I don't wanna spoil it here since it's such a good movie and it wouldn't have shaken me to my core like it did if I knew what happened so I'll tag any Scream spoilers if they come up in asks!)

The next oneshot for Namjoon or Seokjin in the 'I like my men like I like my...' Series: Self-explanatory! Those 2 are tied for first in the surverymonkey poll I made so one of them will be done first!

Final Fantasy 4 Au: This one is kind of... personal. This is a game I go to for comfort- it was actually the first game I ever played along with Kingdom Hearts 358/2 Days. I'd like to shift my focus here- figure out who's playing what role and then absolutely lose myself in the fic. It's gonna be a damn wild ride folks.

For those who don't know the story which I'll assume is the majority of you- y'all are in for a good time. It's highly fantasy based with each castle or kingdom having it's own values and feel. There's drama, romance, death, hatred, family, jealousy- all of it's here. I also feel like I can do it justice. The World Ends With You(my favorite game of all time) was a potential choice as well but I don't think I'm up to snuff for that one yet. Maybe after I finish out this one. We'll see. One game at a time. 😉

Life Is Strange(First game) AU: Okay so I know I just one game at a time lmao but I feel like the focus on time travel elements(though it'll be Reader with them and not Jin) and the realistic characters and focus on their relationships just fits perfectly. I'm leaning towards making this an interactive story like the game does(with my own twists of course)- though that does mean it'll be a significant wait between chapters as I'll be typing out all scenarios and such. It sounds really fun though so I hope you guys like the sound of it!

Boys Over Flowers/Cheese in the Trap/Shut Up Flower Boy Band or a Combination of some sort AU: Because I'm a slut for kdrama and need to get my creative juices out by ranting about the characters and amazing storylines through BTS.

And finally-

A soulmate au of somekind: I have 1 already in the works where the boys are all supernatural creatures but I'm debating one with either a sub/dom bond(switches won't be let out so don't worry) and/or a hybrid/A/B/O universe since I've been intrigued by those storylines after some Life is Strange fanfic.

Thank you guys so much for your patience. I'm eternally grateful, truly. If you'd like- feel free to send in a ranking of the above ideas so I can get a feel for what you want to see next!

Thanks and sorry again for being MIA!

[luthorao3]

Roisa Secret Santa | Mac & Cheese

Prompt: Mac & Cheese, side of angst Rating: T (teen)  Word count: 2009 words 

merry christmas, @only-freakin-sunflowers!!!  

it’s been so much fun writing this little piece and dropping into your inbox to spread that festive cheer this winter. (im dreadful at keeping secrets when im excited about something - the amount of times i panicked that i’d sent an ask without anonymous being ticked, my god...) i really wanted to add an over the top cutesy ending to this, but when i tried to write it, it just didn’t fit with the foundations that i’d already set down, so i’m sorry if you’re expecting that! i hope this story does your prompt justice, and thank you for all the lovely replies to my asks these past few weeks! 

i hope that the next few days bring you so much joy (and some freakin good food, man), and that the new year is kind to you. <3 

Luisa’s gaze lingers on the view from their balcony window.

They’ve been in France for three nights, already, tucked into a snowy city with a Swiss border, and mountains that threaten the stars sitting peacefully in their back yard. Luisa feels the biting chill even in spite of her many layers, but does not make to enter the wooden chalet that Rose had secured them for the week. The glass doors behind her reveal a lamp-lit bedroom and the suitcase that they never bothered to unpack, given that they might, at any point, need to make a speedy escape.

Luisa cranes her neck to see the row of wooden buildings that line the mountain road, instead, some small and quaint, others triple-storey and magnificent, all of them like a scene from a real festive movie – the kind with snow piled up to the windows, and hot cocoa with marshmallows floating on top, and innocent mishaps that threaten to ruin Christmas for good, but never actually succeed.

It’s not Luisa’s first white Christmas, and yet the novelty has never really worn off.

Behind her, the sound of a sliding door opening and closing signals Rose’s return from the shower.

Warm arms wrap tightly around her from behind, struggling around her middle and the three separate jackets that Luisa has smuggled herself into. Rose snorts a delicate laugh when she barely manages to rest her chin on Luisa’s shoulder, the faux fur around her hood tickling her cheek. She smells like hotel shampoo and warmth, and Luisa sinks back against her with a sigh.

“Are you still brooding?” Rose asks by her ear.

Luisa considers the question before answering with a quiet, “A little.”

“What can I do to make it better?” Her gaze flicks to one side. “We can turn on the hot tub.”

“I’m not really in the mood for that. Besides, it’s freezing.”

Rose’s voice lilts, suggestive, when she offers, “I can keep you warm.”

Luisa straightens, relieving Rose of her weight, and turns around. She balks when she realises Rose is wearing nothing but a thick white bath robe and a pair of complimentary slippers, damp red hair hanging limp over one shoulder, inviting a frost. “Are you serious? Get inside right now!” Luisa’s concern for her far outweighs the lingering uneasiness that had led her out onto the balcony, where she’d hoped the frigid air would cool her temper. “You’re going to catch your death.”

Rose stops Luisa from man-handling her inside with gentle but firm hands on her biceps.

“Wait. Talk to me before we go back in there. I know you’re upset, and I don’t want to bring this to dinner with us. Tell me how you’re feeling? Let me help.”

Luisa’s mouth gapes like a fish forced to the surface. She clicks it shut with more force than she means. “I’m feeling cold just looking at you. Please can we just—” She attempts to usher Rose back toward the balcony door, but Rose is firm and unrelenting. Her gaze pierces Luisa like a spear, rooting her in place, until Luisa drops her arms with a sigh. “I don’t want to do this right now. Can we go sit down inside, where you’re less likely to contract hypothermia?”

“No,” Rose answers plainly, crossing her arms. She looks less affected by the weather. If not for the gooseflesh crawling up her exposed throat, Luisa might assume she couldn’t even feel the cold. “I’m sick of pretending that nothing’s wrong, or biting my tongue and hoping that whatever’s upsetting you will eventually just go away. It isn’t, and it’s—” her acerbic tone gentles, the words whispering out of her in visible puffs of white breath, “it’s not fair for you to pretend that you’re okay just to keep me from worrying. I know you, Luisa, I know when something is bothering you.”

Luisa blinks a sheen of moisture from her eyes and lowers them to the knot in Rose’s bathrobe. She tugs on it with gloved fingers and then re-ties it tighter than it had been, all the while with Rose waiting patiently for her to speak. Casting a look over her shoulder, Luisa eyes the distance to the ground from their balcony perch, and considers how badly she might hurt herself if she were to jump.

She’d survive the fall. Probably, the landing could do little damage…

The thought brings a soft tut from beneath her tongue, and she releases the robe with a cloudy sigh.

“It’s Christmas,” she whispers, unable to meet Rose’s gaze. Instead, it lingers in the fine silver stitching details on the robe’s lapels – spun silken snowflakes caught in a wintry gale. Just looking at them makes her feel colder. “It’s Christmas Day and I can’t call anyone to wish them a Merry Christmas. I can’t even write. I have no idea what they’re doing, if they’re together, if they’re okay— they have no idea about me, either.” Her expression draws in, bottom lip pulled between her teeth. “I bet they’re not even thinking of me. I bet, if they are, it won’t be anything good.”

It comes out on a breath of laughter that holds no mirth, and Luisa swallows against the lump in her throat.

“I chose to do this,” she says, and Rose wonders which one of them she’s addressing. “I wanted this, us, I chose you. I don’t regret that.” She looks up, finally, her big brown eyes soft and warm and a little watery, sheening against the light coming from the balcony doors. “I don’t regret that,” louder, steadier, her hands coming to rest in the crooks of Rose’s elbows. “I knew this wouldn’t be easy. I’m just… struggling, I guess.”

Rose presses closer, her slippers dragging against the balcony decking.

She presses a cold, soft hand to Luisa’s cheek – holds it there, until the warmth of Luisa’s skin inspires feeling back into her fingers.

“No one’s faulting you for that,” she murmurs, her voice a low hum. “I know it hasn’t been easy, loving me.”

Luisa’s brow wrinkles. “Don’t think that.”

“I don’t blame you for anything, you know? If not for me, you’d be with them, now.”

“Would I?” Luisa bites the inside of her cheek until it dimples. “We never had Christmases like normal families, not like what you’d see on TV. The best Christmas I ever had was when I decided to stay in college over winter break. It was just me and the foreign exchange students; they did potluck in their dorm, and we ate out in the hall on beanbags and pillows, and then we played hide and seek in the library.” Her brow crinkles again, this time fondly. “I made out with a girl from Greece who was built like a professional football player. I can’t even remember her name.”

Rose snorts delicately, warm breath puffing from her nostrils.

The sight draws a tender smile to Luisa’s mouth.

“You’re not, you know?” she says, stepping forward, lassoing her arms around Rose’s waist and pulling her closer. “You’re not hard for me to love at all. My life would probably be much simpler if you were.”

Rose hangs her arms around Luisa’s shoulders, relaxing against her front.

“It’d be boring,” she agrees, and Luisa snickers. “Sometimes boring is good, when the alternative is going on the run from the law and never seeing your family again.”

“Thanks, I was just getting over that.”

Rose brings both hands to Luisa’s face, this time, squashing her sarcasm between them.

“You’ll never be over that,” she says, and the matter-of-factness of the statement makes Luisa’s breath hitch, but then she never has managed to get over how delicately Rose delivers her killing blows. Rose knows exactly how to turn the world inside out, and she can do it with the same precision it takes for a needle to pop a balloon. The bang makes you jump even when you’re expecting it.

Rose studies her face like she’s looking for a reaction, like she’s waiting for something to happen. Luisa wonders if she’s supposed to protest, but can’t. Won’t. Finally, Rose’s gaze softens. “Next year,” she says, picking her words with care, and with the future so far in the distance Luisa cannot blame her, “I’ll give you a proper Christmas. Dinner, presents, a tree. Anything you want.”

“Anything I want?” Luisa repeats, smiling, but Rose’s expression keeps its almost-solemn quality.

“Anything you want,” she agrees. “I’ll take you to Lapland, I’ll buy you your own goddamn reindeer, if that’s what you ask for.”

“I mean, I don’t know the first thing about their diet,” Luisa scoffs, and then her brows draw in tight with thought, “but Google has never failed me before…” Rose shivers, drawing Luisa’s attention quickly back to her. “What’s this about dinner, though? It’s not too late to find somewhere, right? I know it’s not the same as cooking your own, but I think we’re just gonna have to forgive ourselves for that, given the circumstances.”

“Actually,” Rose begins, coy, caressing Luisa’s cheek with the fat of her thumb, “I thought we’d eat in, still. I don’t want to tempt fate, today of all days. It won’t be a Christmas Dinner, or anything even remotely close to it, but I want to do this for you. I want you all to myself tonight, if that’s okay with you.”

“Wait, you want to cook for me?” At Rose’s nod, Luisa’s lips press closed. “Babe, I love you, but you really don’t need to do that.”

“What are you trying to say?”

Luisa clears her throat. “I mean…”

“Wow,” Rose puffs, unable to hide her smile, even if the offence is real. She drops her hands from Luisa’s face, draping her arms back around her shoulders. Their bodies sway together as Rose suppresses a laugh. “Fine then. I won’t cook.”

Luisa squeezes her tighter around the middle. “You can’t cook, sweetie, it’s not a matter of won’t.”

Rose scoffs but does not disagree, until—

“I can manage mac ‘n’ cheese,” she says, lips pursed. “I can make a really good packet mac ‘n’ cheese.”

Luisa’s eyes her, dubious. “You want mac ‘n’ cheese?”

“I do.”

“You want to make us mac ‘n’ cheese out of a box for Christmas Dinner?”

“That’s right.”

“Huh.”

Rose wets her lips and instantly regrets it. Her ears are beginning to ring from the cold.

“Will you eat it, if I do?”

Luisa snorts and nods her head.

“At this point, I’d take peanut butter on toast. Come on, though, let’s get inside before you freeze to death. Popsicle isn’t on the menu tonight.”

As she says it, she untangles Rose’s arms from around her shoulders and ushers her toward the balcony door.

Shivering, Rose shakes her head, taking Luisa’s hands in hers and halting any further movement. At her girlfriend’s confusion, she presses a kiss to each gloved palm, and then her face. Luisa shivers at the feeling of her mouth, cold and wet, against her own. When she draws back, there’s a light in Rose’s eye – a twinkle in the corner, like a star that’s emerged from behind a slow-drifting cloud – that gives her pause.

“I love you,” Rose tells her, all hot, visible breath and a smile so tender that Luisa bites back the urgency to get them both inside, if just to bask in the warmth that is Rose’s unwavering adoration. “I love you so much. If I could change things—” She sighs. She can’t, and so she discards the thought, with effort. “I’m sorry it isn’t everything you deserve. I’m going to do better, Lu, I mean it.”

Luisa bites the inside of her lip, blinking back the glaze of moisture in her eyes – it only attracts the cold.

“We both are,” she promises, sniffing. “Please, can we go inside now?”

Rose laughs and nods her head.

When Luisa next tries to save her from the cold, she gives no protest, and they step hand-in-hand back into the warmth.

[zefyre]

Excuse me? How could I miss any of your updates xD?!? Cheking in regulary and the new pfk one s just so swoon worthy! I love how you wrote the whole thing, And you are ofc right, the jelly thing would be more like James (maybe at first just teasing her how he is jelly, then really becoming jelly and last stage would be scared that she does leave dumb him? lol now I want a fic with james becoming jelly! *pretty pls?*). Ugh I loved how you wrote it so much! Cant wait for raising the stakes tbh

aksjhdfd i’m!! so sorry!!! / cries/ this has been sitting in my inbox for almost a year and i started it back when you sent this but couldn’t manage to finish until today when i stumbled onto it in my docs and decided to try again. thank you for your sweet words btw haha, i hope you see this and enjoy~

.

It started when James found Kagome muttering almost furiously one day, a letter in hand and a flush across her face. 

She hadn’t noticed his approach, so distracted by her letter she was, and he felt his curiosity grow to a point where he couldn’t help himself. He casually strode past her, a growing smile on his face when he did so undetected, before he backtracked to sneak up on her. 

Once close enough, James hooked his chin over her shoulder as he simultaneously grabbed onto her hips to hold her steady, so he didn’t get clipped in the chin if she jolted. 

A chuckle escaped him when not only did Kagome jump as he predicted, but she also let out the most adorable squeak, slapping the letter against her chest – an act that piqued his curiosity even more, as if she had something to hide.

“Wotcha reading?” he drawled, resting his head against the side of her own, only to draw back when he saw the flush on her face darken out of the corner of his eyes. His grin grew, a trickle of giddiness trickling up his spine at the sight of it spreading all the way down her neck. “Oh ho ho,” he said with a breathy laugh, “This wouldn’t be from a secret admirer now, would it?

He laughed in earnest when her face twisted in an expression of mortification, a whine escaping her throat. “Well that’s a yes,” he sniggered. He raised a hand, wiggling his fingers pleading. “Are you gonna let me see it?”

With a long-suffering sigh and a reluctance that one would think she was signing over her life, Kagome surrendered the letter, holding it out for James to read. Unable to witness the deed with her own eyes, she shut them and leaned her head back against James’ shoulder to save herself from the grief.

James eagerly scoured the letter and soon realized with a bubble of delight that Kagome’s reaction wasn’t an overreaction – the bloke actually opened the letter with some of the cheesiest poetry he’d ever laid his eyes upon. 

“To my dearest angel, with eyes so faire, even the stars cannot match the luster of your stare,” James tried reciting with somber flair – he managed up until the word “luster", breaking out into pained wheezes trying to hold back his mirth. “I’m sorry, I’m sorry, no more reading aloud,” he choked out when he saw the tell-tale twitch of her eyebrow and the tightening grip she held the letter,  and knew if he kept it up she would looked ball up the parchment without hesitation. “Okay, okay, phew.” As he read on, his smile diminished once he got past the cheesy poetry and the letter took a more earnest turn. “You know him well?” he wondered absently as he continued to read, not knowing why that surprised him so much, and not wanting to know why that idea..  niggled at him, either.

He thought it was just some anonymous, star-struck underclassman writing her, to be honest, but the letter was now talking about a meeting they had in the summer. 

Kagome let out a sound that was a cross between a sigh and a hum. “For a few years now, yeah… He’s a good friend of Inuyasha’s brother. We met over… the summer after fourth year, I think it was, when we happened visit them at the same time.”

He glanced at her, blinking owlishly. “I didn’t even realize Inuyasha had a brother.”

Kagome snorted. “Half brother,” she explained,  “He’s a couple years older and they get on like cats and dogs. He also went to Durmstrang, where he met Kouga.”

“And he’s been sending you these things ever since?” James asked, taking her hand and waving the letter in the air before stopping short, mouth dropping open as realization hit him. He sputtered, laughter bubbling in his chest, “No, no, no, this isn’t the same guy that sent you that singing howler on Valentine’s day in fifth year, is it?

James all but exploded in laughter when Kagome groaned and buried her face in her hands. “You got detention for a week for setting that thing on fire in the middle of the hall!” he crowed, hugging her tightly to his chest in lieu of clutching his stomach, his head folding over her shoulder.

Kagome began to bang her head back against his chest, repeatedly. “That was so embarrassing,” she groaned, sinking against him. “The detention was worth it to get it to stop.”

“Merlin,” he muttered, still laughing, “I think I might be a little jealous,” he teased, pouting his lips at her.

“Don’t be.” Kagome said it so bluntly that it made him laugh again. “I tried telling him I’m not interested but he never really listened. I think he was hanging on in the hopes that I’ll give in one day.”

Now that made him frown. “Not bloody likely,” he muttered, unconsciously pulling her snugger against his chest. 

Kagome grinned and reached up to give him a little pat on his cheek in reassurance. “He’s harmless, if a little pushy maybe,  but I think he does it mostly to get on Inuyasha’s nerves. Now they really hate each other.“ Instead of pulling her hand away, she used it to cup his cheek, sweeping her thumb along the curve of his cheekbone. “Since he found out about you, it’s now like a jokey tradition kind of thing,” she explained, rolling her eyes to add, “Still bloody embarrassing though.”

James felt something in his chest settle then. “Oh,” he said a a small laugh, perhaps a little too relieved, and his chest puffed out a bit. “You told him about me?” he cheesed, feeling smug.

Kagome burst out into a bout of snickering. “More like Inuyasha gloated in Kouga’s face first thing that he lost his chance when we both visited this past summer.”

James was pleasantly surprised Inuyasha did that for him – after all, they got off on the wrong foot last year and things had been awkward around each other ever since, which made the moment’s they crossed paths in the tower uncomfortable to be sure. “He did that?” The ‘For me?’ unspoken, only to have his spirits dampened when Kagome snorted and shot him a look of pity. 

Not for him then.

“They really, really don’t get along,” Kagome explained, laughing once more.

.

.

Kagome continued to receive the letters, but after some time she began to keep the correspondence to herself. They weren’t cheesy love letters, she’d tell him, but more personal in nature and as such it didn’t feel right to share with others. 

James completely understood of course, didn’t mind, but he would be lying if he said there wasn’t a… discomfiting feeling that took to stirring inside his chest whenever he witnessed a certain owl delivering letters to Kagome, one that only grew over time when the letters increased in frequency – when he’d spied the soft smile blossoming along her lips upon reading said letters. 

It got worse when Valentine’s came and she received a package – a gift, more sincere than the obnoxious ones of the singing variety she’d gotten in the past: her favorite flowers and special chocolate truffles imported from France along with another letter that made her smile bright and laugh a flattered sort of laugh and even blush the faintest shade of pink.

The burning in his chest only eased slightly when a Howler came three days later and Kagome immediately panicked, arm whipping out, wand in hand, and lighting it up into flame before the owl could even properly take off from the table – causing a chain reaction of the owl shitting in fright on a fifth year, the tablecloth catching fire, and three sixth years getting drenched with pumpkin juice in a failed attempt to put it out.

Fifty points were deducted that night from Hufflepuff, and Kagome earned herself two weeks worth of detention for the spectacular display.

.

.

It all eventually came to a head one day in the middle of Hogsmeade when James stopped short at the sight of a handsome man with long dark hair pulled back into a ponytail and striking blue eyes down on one knee in front of Kagome, one hand cradling her left while his other held out something that glinted bright in the rare sunlight.

“Holy shite, is that guy proposing to Kagome?” Sirius choked out from beside him, equally rendered stunned at the scene, but James could barely hear him over the roar in his head, over the heavy, rapid beat of his heart in his ears, over the monster that grew in his chest at the sight of someone proposing to Kagome.

Over the deafening thought that he wanted to be the one to propose to her, and the… the anger he was taken aback to find simmering hot and foul at the bottom his belly at the simple, and yet mind-blowing fact that he wasn’t the one do it first.

He was just about to turn on his heel and run away, afraid of the scene before him and even more terrified of the turn his thoughts had taken, when a sharp smack echoed out loud the street. His head snapped up to stare wide-eyed at Kagome’s hand still raised and the man’s head turned at an exact ninety degree angle.

“This is not funny!” James heard her shout, her voice strangled and frantic, tinged with disgust as she went on to say, “Put that thing away!”

And to his utmost shock, the man threw his head back in laughter and did as she asked, snapping the velvet box shut and shoving it back into his trouser pockets as he clambered back up onto his feet. 

And, to his ever mounting surprise, pull Kagome into a bear hug that while she didn’t completely accept, she didn’t exactly fight him off like he thought she would either.

Now, James found himself striding closer to the pair, unable to ignore the growing, curiosity gnawing his chest. 

“I’m sorry, I’m sorry, old habits die hard,” James overheard the man say, still laughing. “Couldn’t help myself.”

“You’re as bad as Miroku proposing to Sango every weekend.”

“Hey, she gave in eventually didn’t she?”

Kagome refused to deign that remark with an answer. “Now get off me you big oaf, you know I have a boyfriend. He’s gonna have a heart attack if he hears about some strange bloke proposing to me in the middle of Hogsmeade!”

Striking blue eyes caught James’s and he was startled to see a hint of fang in the smirk the other man flashed.  “Oh,” he chortled, not even bothering to keep his voice quiet. In fact, he projected it so James could clearly hear him. “I don’t think you have to worry about the rumors getting to him first – he wouldn’t happen to be the tall bloke with the glasses coming just now would he? Cause he’s giving me quite the evil eye.”

Instantly, Kagome’s hand snapped out to start wrapping him against the arms to release her, which he did a chuckle, arms steering wide.

Once free, Kagome whipped around, the familiar look of mortification whenever it came to a certain Durmstrang graduate clear on her face, and he already knew what she was going to say.

“James!” she said, a little breathless and on a nervous laugh. “This is, haha, this is Kouga. I’ve told you about him.” She sounded honest-to-Merlin at her wit’s end at that last part.

James crossed his arms and raised an eyebrow. “Am I going to have to duel him for your hand in marriage?” He looked over Kagome’s head to lock stares with Kouga as she suddenly choked. Despite his snarking tone, his gaze was uncharacteristically serious. “Cause I will.”

“What is this, the dark ages?” she sputtered, before waving her hands hastily between them, “And there will be no dueling because that was just his idea of. Of a Joke.” She turned to give Kouga a filthy glare when he shifted a little uneasily behind her, adding in a much darker tone, “A bad one.”

James broke out in an easy smile that still held a bit of edge. “Oh I know,” he said pleasantly, sounding all light-hearted now, even as he smile turned a little smug. “I could tell by the slap. I think even kids in Hogwarts could hear it, it was a beautiful one, love.”

Kagome’s head tipped to the side to study him, and it was the uncertain look that crossed her face that had him inwardly sighing and backing down. He strode over, dropping a reassuring kiss on her temple as he passed her before offering his hand to the older man. “James Potter,” he introduced himself. He also offered a half grin, “I’d say nice to meet you, but, I just saw you propose to my girlfriend.”

“Kouga,” he introduced himself laughing a little, a little nervous. “It, uh, it really was a joke,” he said, taking James’s hand and shaking it. “The ring’s actually for my girlfriend. Fiancé. Hopefully, if she accepts that is.”

“And she will,” Kagome chimed in, giving Kouga another stink eye, “So long as she doesn’t murder us both if she ever hears of this.”

Kouga waved her off with a robust laugh. “She’s in Japan visiting family, she won’t know a thing!”

“She always knows,” he heard Kagome mutter, watching as Kouga suddenly gave a deep wince when she continued to say, “She knew about Valentine’s,” which was when James realized the Howler from back then must’ve been from his girlfriend instead of Kouga and… and that Kouga must have been dating her even that far back. 

Louder, Kagome went on to say something about how Kouga started writing to her about this Ayame, his hopeful fiancé to be, asking for advice and sharing about his ideas to propose, all which James heard but didn’t quite take in completely as he was slipping back into his thoughts.

This meant, that this whole time, the growing… growing jealousy that he’d felt – he couldn’t deny what it was now that he knew – seeing Kagome with the letters… all that worry had been for nothing…

Merlin, he felt like a bloody idiot. 

.

.

It wasn’t until after Kouga left, treating them all to lunch – Sirius included, who had hung back, fists at the ready for the moment James needed him to jump in to help kick the arse of the bloke trying to propose to his best mate’s girl – for his self-admitted “dumbarse stunt” before taking the Floo back to his flat, that Kagome confronted him. 

“James?” he heard her quietly prod, felt her nudge him gently against his side. He turned to see her looking up at her, “Everything alright?”

James sighed, managed a small smile to reassure her, before turning to Sirius to ask for a moment alone with Kagome. He caught on quick, clapping him on the shoulder before getting up and making his way to the bar. 

When he turned back to face Kagome again, he found her worrying her bottom lip. With another sigh, this one fond, he reached up with his thumb to gently tug her lip away from her teeth to save it from further abuse. “It’s not your fault,” he told her with genuine honesty, taking her hand and intertwining their fingers, “I’ve just been a bit thick lately and hadn’t realize it until today.”

“Kouga,” Kagome guessed, and correctly at that. James nodded, squeezing her hand. “I never realized the letters upset you, I’m sorry, James, if I did…”

She trailed off when he shook his head, squeezing her hand more insistently this time. “No, no, this was all me, getting into my own head, seeing things that wasn’t there and never… speaking up about it. I’d thought…” he trailed off, with a rueful, self-deprecating laugh as he confessed, “I’d thought the letters were working on you, I guess. I saw you get them, and how you’d… laugh, or even blush, and built it up to something it clearly wasn’t.” 

James reached up with his free hand to tuck a fallen curl out of Kagome’s face and behind her ear, pressing a kiss against her furrowed brow to smooth it out  smiling when it worked and Kagome leaned into his touch. “Never once realized I was jealous until I saw the bloke today, down on one knee in front of you and a pretty impressive rock in his hand,” he said with a wry laugh.

“Gods,” Kagome breathed out, laughing along with him. “All this time I was helping him with Ayame, it scared the shite out of me when he did it.” Quietly, more hesitantly, she added to say, a pretty flush rising to her cheeks, “Definitely, uh, definitely not the one I thought about… about proposing to me.”

James was not ashamed to admit how breathless her admission made him, the sight of Kagome shyly averting her gaze, her blush darkening further, as he whispered, “Yeah?” and she nodded, biting her lip once again to hide her flustered smile. 

Nor was he ashamed at how eagerly he quietly confessed in return, “I think what upset me the most was the fact that I wasn’t the one to propose to you first, joke or not.” 

Stunned, Kagome steered a wide eyed gaze back up at him, silently mouthing “Really?” and he laughed, a little giddy, and pressed his forehead against hers. 

“Trust me on this, Kagome, I was not kidding about dueling that prat for your hand. And I’d’ve kicked his arse, you know I would.” At her breathless, snorting laugh, James grinned a foolish grin, before he sobered and slipped his hand free of hers to cup the sides of her face instead. 

“One day, I’m gonna propose,” he promised, and watched with rapt attention how her blush returned in full force, mingling with the freckles smattered across her cheeks, and the roundness, the misty sheen her gorgeous blue eyes took on in response.

James felt his heart flutter, so incredibly entranced right then and there, and swallowed down the nerves that was building up in his throat. 

“Not now,” he ruefully muttered, “And certainly not in middle of The Three Broomsticks where all you can smell is the butterbeer and stale fish and chips, but…” 

James trailed off and gazed warmly at Kagome with gentle grin. “But one day it’s gonna be me getting down on one knee, offering you up a ring, riding on the hope you’d grant me the incredible honor of becoming your husband, because as sure as I knew it the day you threatened me with your bat that you were something special,” and James paused, grinning wider as Kagome burst out in a watery chuckle, her eyes way past misty now and almost spilling with tears, before he told her so solemn, so empathetically, with as much emotion and confidence that he could summon, “I know you’re it for me, and there’s not a chance I’ll let you slip away, not if I can help it.”