#this has been sitting in my drafts on here as a chat post since june 2022

[chenziee]

Always an Accident

This silly, chaotic little story was brought to you by @fumiiigation who picked it from my list of ideas!! Thank you for your support and patience 🤍

[ READ ON AO3 | KO-FI ]

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Bepo loved his job at the hospital, loved being a nurse. Despite the grueling hours and the both physically and emotionally exhausting work, he loved helping his patients and he loved the people he worked with—both the doctors and his fellow nurses.

Sometimes, however, he wished he wasn’t a man in a largely female population of the nurses’ office. Their topics of conversation could, on rare occasions, be… uncomfortable.

Especially when he walked in on them without anyone noticing.

“I swear, they should stop making men so hot if they weren’t going to put a nice personality in there, too,” one of the girls, Mina, muttered as her eyes followed one Trafalgar Law as he walked through the emergency room public area.

“I know, right?” Tate, the head nurse, agreed. “Trafalgar is so nice to look at but then he opens his mouth and he’s like that… Thank god he’s a surgeon and doesn’t have to talk with the patients all that much. His bedside manner is just…”

“Godawful?”

“Come on, guys, he’s not that bad. Just… blunt,” Tristan tried.

“Easy for you to say, you don’t have a big fat crush on him. That intern of yours under Doctor Kureha… What was his name, Tony? He’s much nicer. You should ask him on a date already.”

Immediately, Tristan flushed deep red as she muttered something incoherent before burying her face in her hands in embarrassment.

Bepo cringed, trying to convince himself he couldn’t hear anything; after all, not only was the topic not something wanted to participate in at all, but… that was his best friend of over twenty years they were talking about. Even though Bepo could admit they weren’t wrong, it still didn’t make him very happy to hear.

Clearing his throat to alert the girls to his presence, Bepo watched as guilty looks flashed across all three women’s faces as they greeted him. But, it only took a second before Mina shook the shame of being caught off like a pro.

“Hey, Bepo,” she started slowly, “you’re friends with Doctor Trafalgar, right?”

“Uhm… yeah? Sorry.” Bepo eyed her warily as certain eagerness found its way to her eyes.

“Does he have a girlfriend? What does he like? What’s his type? He never talks about himself!” she finished with a whine, staring up at Bepo like he was her only salvation.

Taken aback by the flurry of questions, Bepo blinked, his mouth falling open even as words all but escaped him. Where did he even start…?

“Next patient please!”

Inadvertently, Bepo looked up at Law’s voice, before his gaze was drawn to the people who stood up… and his eyes went wide. He knew that green hair and earrings shaped like katanas. And he most certainly knew the guy with a clearly broken arm who was reluctantly trudging after him, black hair and scar under his eye, looking so guilty as his friend all but dragged him behind the curtain to see the doctor.

Bepo closed his eyes, silently praying to whoever was listening to let this pass peacefully.

“Bepo…?”

His eyes snapping open, Bepo looked at Tate, giving his superior the most sincere apology that he could muster in advance. Then, he turned to Mina. “I think you’re getting your answers in about ten seconds…”

A beat of confused silence passed but before any of the girls could voice the questions that were clearly on the tips of their tongues—

“What the fuck?!”

“It was an accident!”

Taking a deep breath, Bepo’s expression twisted into a grimace. He knew peace was too much to hope for…

“It’s always an accident with you, Straw Hat-ya! I swear to fucking god, the second I take my eyes off of you, you break something! Do you think you’re made of rubber or some shit?!”

Bepo flinched at Law’s angry yelling. He couldn’t help but notice how he reverted back to the old nickname—a sign that he was really, really angry.

Three identical looks of bemused shock turned to Bepo, wordlessly asking for all the answers in the world. Understandable, but Bepo wasn’t looking forward to explaining—and excusing—this very public mess.

Finally, Tristan spoke up, her voice quiet and almost scared. “Bepo, what’s going on?”

Bepo looked at her, a strange kind of pain in his chest as he opened his mouth to answer. “Straw Hat, the patient who just walked in, he’s—”

“No, don’t I-love-you me when you have a fucking bone sticking out of your fucking arm!”

“—Law’s husband,” Bepo finished, feeling completely and utterly defeated.

“Well…” Tate drawled, slight annoyance making its way to her voice. “Nice way to get a glimpse into Trafalgar’s life.”

Bepo’s head dropped. “I’m so sorry, boss.”

----------

As he stood in front of the door to the examination room where Tate had banished Law and his husband after Straw Hat’s X-ray was done, Bepo tried to gather the courage to knock. Law was really mad earlier, after all; an anger born of worry, but still anger nonetheless.

Was it safe to get in the middle of that yet? He didn’t hear Straw Hat blaming Roronoa and anything else he could think of, nor was Law yelling about ‘falling in love with idiots’ and ‘dumbass fucking ideas’ or telling Straw Hat he was sleeping in Onigiri’s bed tonight anymore, so… probably?

Taking a deep breath, Bepo finally raised his hand to knock, waiting for a moment before cracking the door open.

“Uhm… Guys? It’s Bepo, sorry. Can I come in?”

After Law’s tired reply, Bepo pushed the door open all the way, taking the scene before him in for the first time.

The two of them were sitting in chairs next to each other with Straw Hat leaning back casually, a carefree grin on his face as he happily greeted Bepo as if nothing was wrong, while Law gingerly examined his forearm. Bepo actively chose to ignore the way Straw Hat’s shirt was suspiciously wrinkled around his neckline as if someone had grabbed him to pull towards themselves, as well as the slight mess that Law’s hair was now. He really didn’t want to think about that.

Instead, Bepo turned his eyes to the thing that got them in this situation in the first place.

“Do you need any help with the treatment? Do we have to operate?”

“Nah, I’m fine. Torao just overreacted,” Straw Hat replied before Law could so much as open his mouth.

Law clicked his tongue in annoyance, his fingers that were holding Straw Hat’s arm twitching. “Sure, Luffy, blame me for being pissed to find you in the fucking ER for the fifth time just this month.”

“Not true! It’s the second time at most!” Straw Hat retorted as he stuck his tongue out defiantly.

“Want me to pull out the records?” Law deadpanned, shooting Straw Hat a look before sighing. “One day I’m going to find you on my operating table and then fucking what am I gonna do?”

Bepo flinched. There it was, the heart of this entire issue. Bepo couldn’t say he didn’t see where Law was coming from; after all, Straw Hat did find himself in the hospital almost as often as the people who actually worked there and it wasn’t good for Law’s heart.

And, judging by the guilty, sad look that flashed over Straw Hat’s face, the man knew it, too.

“I’m sorry, Torao…” he muttered, leaning over to squeeze Law’s knee with his good hand.

Law looked up at him, something heavy and so very loving in his eyes and suddenly, Bepo felt incredibly uncomfortable.

Clearing his throat awkwardly to remind them he was there—not that that had ever stopped those two from being sickeningly in love with each other even after all these years—, Bepo watched as the strange tension broke and the both of them went back to what they were doing as if nothing happened.

“Bepo, can you please go grab a brace and the paperwork?”

Bepo nodded, giving the two of them one last look before leaving. As he closed the door after himself, he saw them exchange a slow, tender kiss and he couldn’t help but smile.

They really deserved each other. Despite all their differences, even now, fifteen years later, they still looked just as happy as the day they started dating. Just as happy as they looked on their wedding day. And Bepo was happy for his best friend.

Although, he would certainly appreciate if they stopped subjecting him to scenes like this on the regular.

[yandere-sins]

So I thought I’d give a little life-update as there’s a lot going on at the moment and I think it’s visible on my blog as well. Maybe the positives first:

I do really like my new work, I like that I have set hours (even if I do overtime here and there) and though it got incredible stressful the last few weeks, I think the four people that work in my office space are the coolest in the whole company and I love the support I am getting, it’s something I always wanted for my work-life tbh! My dog is also doing very fine, she’s really a total sweetheart and I wouldn’t know what to do without her, and at least I, myself, am doing pretty okay-ish physically, so nothing to complain there.

Now to the negatives.

Unfortunately, my mom’s cancer returned but is quite hard to pinpoint. She went back to an even more aggressive chemotherapy and we’re hoping for the best. Honestly, I don’t wish cancer on anyone, it’s such a tough battle and even just as the primary caretaker it’s been really hard to deal with for me, luckily I have grandparents and a brother who all deal with it and help and support, so that’s good! My mental health though is suffering. It’s biting my own butt now, but I cancelled therapy to focus on work at the beginning of this year and now my therapist is fully booked, so I will have to sit out this month probably. I am telling that because that’s the reason I am struggling with concentrating on one thing for a long time, which includes writing, which explains the fluctuation of posts you are seeing, since I try to get requests and drafts done on the weekend when there’s less stress. Sadly only works like 30% of the time...

Going forward I have decided to indefinitely pause commissions. I have noticed that they put too much pressure with the deadline and expectancy on me when I am already struggling and sometimes need a day to myself. I can’t say when they’ll come back, but thank you all so much for your interest and support, it’s always a pleasure to write your ideas and I never had a bad experience with commission ♥

Good news for Mermay: it’s still happening! ... buuuut I am shortening the story I came up with. I think I was too ambitious with the three routes I teased, so I am trying to figure out how to ensure that it won’t drag out as much as Atreo’s story last year. Unfortunately, the start will be delayed some more, but we were going to celebrate Mer-June anyway, so at this point it probably doesn’t make as much difference (’:

Because the question arose a few times already, I will not be playing Honkai Star Rail. It has a few reasons, but the main one is I don’t have the time. Sorry to everyone who asked about it, but it’s just not the right time for me at the moment! ): I’ll probably be miserable again later when everyone has moved on to it and I am stuck behind but I have to make cuts somewhere ;;

I actually have some commissions and requests that I haven’t released yet, so I will try to schedule some of these in the meantime while I work out how to go about stuff. If you’ve been around for a while you probably know I like routines that’s why it’s always important for me to build them and keep them up. Other than that, I’ll probably focus on Mermay and my own writing projects which will happen rather irregularly. No guarantees on posting, sadly ):

I do realize tho that it just isn’t always possible to keep up frequency of posts and interactions I had when I started this blog, as much as it saddens me. I have to prioritze my real life before my internet presence (and I really need to not feel guilty about taking breaks from everything ever so often ;;), so if you see me vanishing for a few days, it’s just that really.

Thank you everyone who stuck around and supports this blog ♥ There’s another big milestone coming up veeery soon and I am always in awe that so many people would stay to read my silly little stories!! If you have some time and don’t mind waiting for a response, I’m always happy to chat and answer questions, so please don’t hesitate to hit me up!

Thanks everyone ♥

[atinylittlepain]

Monday Digest - sure, why not

hi, folks

been a minute since i've done one of these. first and foremost, thank you to everyone who sent in kind messages and congrats for me finishing my novel. i have quite literally never felt anything like this - some sort of mix between pure giddiness and dreaded disbelief lol

i also just want to have a sappy moment because, truly, i would have never worked up the gumption and just sheer suspension of disbelief that it took to write this thing without all the work i've done on this blog. so, yeah, thank you all for bringing me back to writing this year, wouldn't be sitting on an 80K manuscript right now without all of your support <3

i have to apologize to my moots because i have not been reading all of your wonderful things while i have been in this first draft cave, but i am looking forward to playing catch up to the best of my ability!

so what's next for me. well, i don't know, quite frankly. i'm excited to get this novel into the hands of beta readers (hi, beta readers, thank you and i love you) and i think i'm going to take a few days off writing entirely in the meantime. summer stretches thin, darlings, still a month to go before thesis and grad apps and all of that, so who knows what i'll get up to in this time i still have.

There is still much left for June and Only Lovers Left Alive and i imagine that's what I'll be posting for the foreseeable future. so let's say new June chapter every Tuesday and new Only Lovers Left Alive every Thursday until they are both completed.

that's about all from me. sadly not many recs, because i literally have not been reading much of anything. though i can always rec @tieronecrush's hot and heavy series, which i did treat myself to the new chapter of this morning

i also have @swiftispunk's new Marcus Pike fic sitting in my likes waiting for me to devour it, just sayin

annnnd one more lol, @morning-star-joy has a joel fic called Honey Don't Feed It, It Will Come Back that was an absolute delight to read this afternoon

i'd like to put a call out to all of you to drop your recommendations in the comments so i can tuck in to some well-deserved reading lmao

thank you thank you for continuing to hang around here, as always, my inbox is open if you'd like to chat or just say hi

with care

gin

[wolfstargames]

Coming Soon

Wolfstar Games 2021 is coming soon!

What is it? A prompt-based fest where participants are split into teams to engage in some fun-spirited competition as they create

How does it work? Each team member will create a work, either fic or art, inspired by a prompt, for their team

Is there a theme? Yes! The theme for this year is NATURE. The Teams are LAND, SEA, and SKY

When is this happening? Sign Ups begin on June 14th and run through June 27th

How long do I have to create something? Works will be due October 24th

And if I want more information?

Just keep reading below!

The Basic Rundown

There will be three teams based upon the fest theme. Participants will be given the chance to request a team upon sign up, but we make no guarantees that you will receive the team you requested, as teams need to be at least relatively even for voting purposes. This is, in fact, a competition, but only in the spirit of pushing each other further to create better works for this ship we all love so much.

Each participant will create a work, fic or art, based upon not only the theme but a prompt. Details on the prompts as well as how to claim them will be revealed after the teams are solidified. Then, those works will be revealed and voted upon in a blind vote to determine how each team did.

During the creation time there will be both team and inter-team activities. These will all be low key and completely optional. They’re just a way to spend some time with your team/fest participants and have a little fun to keep tensions low and promote a friendly sort of competition.

Once posting begins there will be a poll attached to each work, which will be posted anonymously, for readers/viewers to vote on how well the piece fit the theme of the fest as well as how well it fit the prompt. Those votes will be averaged for a total team score at the end of posting. Please keep in mind that these works are not in direct competition with each other. The voting is not meant to compare works. There will simply be a representative work from each team. Please be aware that team participants and mods will not be allowed to vote, for fairness purposes!

As this is a scored fest please keep in mind that all works are to be anonymous. We understand that this is slightly difficult for artists as style may be recognizable, but please do your best. This means that you may not share any snippets, anything more than very vague ideas, or any pieces or bits of your creations until after the reveals when the work is wholly yours to do with as you wish. We do understand the concern about posting unsigned art, so we will be providing a Wolfstar Games watermark for any artist that wishes to use it. And if you have any concerns about this please contact a mod and we will see what we can do for you.

Just remember, Wolfstar Games is about having fun and creating more content for our favorite boys, not about winning or losing. And most importantly, it’s about having fun!

Theme: NATURE

This means any way you want to interpret nature. It could be a story about taking a walk through nature, or about mermaids living in the ocean, or playing a Quidditch game in the air. There are lots of ways to interpret the theme.

Time Line:

Sign-ups begin on Wednesday, June 17th and last through Sunday, June 27th, ending at 11:59pm Eastern time (GMT-5). Sign-ups will happen via google form, so please watch this space for that to go live.

Teams will be announced on Friday, July 2nd. so please watch this space for more info.

Prompts will be available for viewing only on Friday, July 2nd.

Prompts will be available for claiming on Monday, July 5th and will close at 11:59PM EST (GMT-5) on Sunday, July 11th. Prompts will fall into three categories: Word based, Image based, and Audio based. Each prompt will be available only one time per team, so the sooner you make your selections the more likely you are to get the prompt you want. If, for any reason, you are not available during any of the claiming period please contact a mod and we will make accommodations for you.

Works are due by 11:59 PM on Sunday, October 24th EST (GMT-5). As always we want this to be fun and low stress, so if there are any problems with finishing please just contact a mod and we will work with you to see what we can do. As this is a team competition there may be a small points penalty incurred for late works, however, so please contact a mod as soon as you can if there are any difficulties. There will be check ins along the way to see how everyone is doing and make sure there are no issues, but if something arises please don’t feel the need to wait for a check in to talk with a mod. That’s what we’re here for.

Posting begins Monday, November 1st and runs until we run out of works.

The winning team will be revealed once posting is complete and the mods have had a chance to tally the votes. Keep watch on this space for more information on that further into the fest.

Rule & FAQ

What sort of content am I committing to if I sign up?

For fic, the minimum word count will be 1000 words. There is no maximum, however, please keep in mind that ease of reading, which unfortunately sometimes includes length, will have an impact on how the voting goes. We would never dare to stifle anyone’s muse, so please write as the whim takes you, just keep that in mind when you’re creating.

There is no minimum size for art, but we would request that the maximum size be something that is easily viewable on a single screen. Again, we don’t want to cramp anyone’s creativity, but for voting purposes it’s helpful to be able to see the entire work at one time.

What sort of artwork is acceptable?

All art must be visual, original art. By original art, we mean that the final product must be an original product of the artist. Using photos for reference is fine, and you can use whatever traditional or digital medium you require, so long as the art starts and finishes as your own product. Photo manips are not allowed. Hit up the mods if you need clarity on an idea.

Can I use a work that I’ve published previously, or that’s been sitting in my drafts?

For this fest, we need all original content, none of which has been published previously. Since this is a theme and prompt-based fest, all creators should plan on starting new projects so they can be fully inspired by their chosen prompt.

Is there an age requirement to participate?

All ages are welcome! However, if you are under 18, your creation must be rated G or T on AO3.

Are there any other restrictions on creations?

This is a Wolfstar-centric fest, so we do ask that your creation focuses on Remus and Sirius’ relationship, though other pairings are welcome. All fics must be properly tagged with the appropriate content and trigger warnings on AO3. All fics must be edited, beta read, and legible.

Will I need to be signed up for any specific platforms to participate?

You will need an AO3 account for posting purposes. All fest info will be shared on Tumblr. A Discord chat system will be set up as well. All of these platforms, other than AO3, are optional.

Can I share snippets of my work on my social media?

Since this is an anonymous fest, we ask that absolutely no snippets or hints be shared during the run of the fest. Once the fest has concluded, you may post whatever you like to social media.

I can’t sign up, but I still want to participate, what can I do?

No worries, there are lots of ways for you to help support WSG! Follow us on Tumblr; reblog, comment, and share our posts to spread the word. We’ll also be asking for help with beta reading, pinch hitting, and other cool ways for you to get involved!

I’ve got more questions, help!

No problem, we’re happy to hear from you! Ping us on one of the social media sites above, or email wolfstargamesmods at gmail dot com.

[mopeytropey]

a beer buds series: chapter 6

Timeline: takes place during chapter 5 of ‘apu’ just before Lexa and Clarke get a little too drunk while watching movies (oops!) in which they fall asleep on Clarke's couch together (oops again!), subsequently commencing what I like to call The Separation

Beer: Free Rise (MOSAIC) DRY-HOPPED SAISON

This edition of Free Rise highlights locally sourced Danko Rye from Valley Malt and Mosaic in the dry hop. A nuanced fruity hop profile is balanced with subtle, crisp malt character and expressive notes of pepper and clove. Light in body, with a clean, bone-dry finish.

ABV 7.3%

Posted on AO3 here or below the cut :)

Free Rise: Trillium Brewing Co (Fenway/Boston, MA) :::

“This newer location is great, but you really need to experience their beer garden next summer on the green. Clarke is obsessed with it—chances are she’ll probably drag you there at some point.”

Lincoln says it so casually, and the image that Lexa begins to paint comes effortlessly.

She and Clarke on a day trip to Boston in mid June, sharing sips of beer and sampling local food trucks in the afternoon sun. Clarke’s rasping laughter drifting through the park as Lexa is further charmed, relaxing in the warm sun and nearby ocean breezes.

She would allow Clarke to drag her any number of places, Lexa thinks. Given the opportunity.

“I’m excited to see both locations,” she says to Lincoln, as if her mind hadn’t drifted into an idyllic landscape of some potential future.

It’s what she’s begun to sense as of late: possibility.

A recent glimmer of hope has been sparking at the periphery of Lexa’s consciousness. There’s the exhilaration of what might be possible for her and Clarke, even in its uncertainty. Even if she doesn’t have any control over it. She can feel the potential of things to come buzzing through her even now, as she and Lincoln walk under the looming, green shadows of Fenway Park.

“Have you been?” Lincoln asks, nodding towards the infamous baseball park that sits in the heart of the city, surrounded by bars and businesses and gawking tourists.

“Not yet.”

“We should go—I haven’t had anyone to hate watch the Red Sox with in years.”

Lexa smiles up at him. “A cherished pastime.”

They swap baseball stats and playoff predictions while walking down the stretch of Brookline Ave between historic Fenway and Trillium. The city air is crisp and cool, and Lexa almost wishes for a jacket, but the chill invigorates her already vibrant mood. Upcoming plans with Clarke have filled her with an unchecked buoyancy.  

Costia had left that morning for her weekend away with a parting kiss to Lexa’s temple, a warm hand cupped around the back of her neck.

Safe, perfunctory. Everything that Lexa has begun to associate with Costia.

“Can we try to talk about this again when I get back?”

For once, Lexa hadn’t flinched at the mention of Costia’s research grant and its implications for their relationship. “Sure.”

The extent of their goodbye at the door of their apartment had been Costia’s soft look and Lexa’s small smile as she briefly squeezed Costia’s fingers.

There had been a time when impending distance felt torturous—longing would spring up after only hours apart, and Lexa would ache to see her again.

Those moments for them, like so many others, are gone now.

And, if they have lost their weight, if they are no more than performative interactions between them, Lexa has begun to wonder: what’s left?

What is it that has kept her clinging to Costia so willfully?

Lexa has always excelled at making sense of her life and maintaining control, even amidst the chaos and unpredictability that has so often plagued her. She considers herself a rational person with a reasonable sense of the world, particularly the mechanics of her interpersonal relationships.

Being with Costia had been no different. From the very start, they just made sense. Lexa has always found comfort in the expected, seeking logic and practicality in her daily life.

At least, historically.

Ever since Clarke (clumsily) breezed into her life, Lexa hasn’t felt entirely reasonable about much of anything. Clarke is still unfamiliar in many ways. Her entire friendship has been fortuitous, unprecedented. It’s the first time in Lexa’s entire life that she has been irrevocably drawn towards such palpable uncertainty.

“This weather is perfect—I love it up here at this time of year,” Lincoln says.

Lexa breathes in deeply, anchoring herself to this moment and quieting the thoughts of her indeterminate future. “It’s great,” she smiles and continues in stride with Lincoln’s comforting shadow cast over her.

:::

The taproom is stunning: polished wood in every direction, exposed light bulbs hanging from an open ceiling, and thirty-foot glass doors stretching along an entire wall. In the warmer months, Lexa imagines the doors opening to a cluttered patio. In the early autumn temperatures, the patio is empty and half of the room inside is bathed in natural light while the other remains dim and cozy.

Lincoln heads straight for the bar counter. While a handful of other patrons have favored the couches near the windows, the bar sits empty.

“Hey guys.” A woman around their age approaches from behind the bar. She slides two menus in front of them as Lexa takes her seat beside Lincoln. “Here’s what we’re currently pouring on tap. Cans are listed at the bottom. You need a minute?”

“That’d be great. Thanks,” Lincoln answers.

The woman walks away with a smile that Lexa catches only as she looks up from her menu.

Lincoln drums his hands against the counter top. “Oh shit, I know what I’m getting.”

“That was quick,” Lexa says, returning her attention to the draft pours.

“Their gose is ridiculously good.”

“I think I’m going to do the farmhouse.”

“Did you two decide?” The bartender is already approaching as Lexa glances up from her menu. “Sorry—I wasn’t trying to hover, but it’s pretty dead in here today.”

“No worries.” Lexa offers a brief smile and watches the woman’s face transform, brightening as she stops directly in front of her and braces her arms against the edge of the counter.

“I’m gonna do the gose,” Lincoln says.

“And, I’ll do the Free Rise,” Lexa adds.

“That one is my favorite,” the bartender responds, grinning at Lexa as she retrieves their menus. “Be right back with those for you.”

“Thank you,” Lexa says while reaching for her phone that has buzzed twice from the front pocket of her jeans.

She’s fighting a grin at the messages she finds, simultaneously typing her response as Clarke continues her barrage of nonsense, and doesn’t catch the odd look Lincoln is giving her until she slides her phone onto the bar top.

“What?”

“Nothing,” he shrugs, still looking too pleased for Lexa’s comfort. “So, what else are you up to this weekend? You wanna come check out the new poke bowl spot with me and O tomorrow?”

“I’m supposed to watch movies with Clarke tomorrow night—what time were you thinking of going?”

“No idea. I’ll let you know though. Or, you know, bring her with you. We can make it a foursome.”

His suggestion has her ridiculously flustered for what could be no more than an invitation to hang out with three of her friends. But, it’s Lincoln, and Lexa knows better than to underestimate his scheming.

“Yeah, I mean, I’ll, um, I’ll ask her,” Lexa answers, almost immediately distracted again by the vibration of her phone.

She’s still rolling her eyes at Clarke’s entirely ridiculous diatribe about the validity of poorly written screenplays of the early 90s when the woman behind the bar returns with their drinks.

“Here we go. Should I start a tab for you?”

“Um, sure,” Lincoln responds. He fishes out his debit card from his wallet and slides it across the bar counter.

“I really love your sweater, by the way.”

There’s a brief, weighted pause following the sound of the woman’s voice, and Lexa looks up from her phone when she realizes the compliment was meant for her.

“Oh. Thanks.” She flashes another momentary smile before reaching for her beer and sending off her scathing rebuke for Clarke’s lack of cinematic prowess.

The absolute ire that it will produce and the irritated messages that will follow almost make Lexa giggle in public. Pushing Clarke’s buttons has become an accidentally honed skill.

“Correct me if I’m wrong, but are you not the same person who told me—not two weeks ago—that having beautiful women flirting with you typically grabs your attention?”

Lexa closes her phone instantly, replacing it to her jeans pocket where she hopes it will be safe from Lincoln’s insightful observations. Like getting caught with her hand in the cookie jar, she attempts to clear her face of any guilt as she looks over at Lincoln because Clarke had not been flirting with her in the first place. They have merely been discussing preferences in film through a medium of quick wit and lightly antagonistic banter.

“What are you talking about?”

Lincoln’s voice drops to an even lower volume as he leans towards her. “That bartender has been chatting you up since we walked in, and you seem to be on another planet right now.”

“She was not—”

“Oh-ho-ho,” Lincoln laughs. “Believe me. She definitely was.”

Lexa chances a quick glance down the length of the bar towards the woman polishing glassware. She looks up before Lexa can avert her gaze, and that same smile is back. Lexa’s stomach drops regretfully.

She hadn’t registered the blatant interest from their bartender nor her physical features, which are, objectionably, quite attractive.

Damn it, Lincoln.

“How is it?” the woman calls out, and Lexa raises her glass with a forced smile.

She takes a sip, pretending it isn’t her first, and can actually feel Lincoln fighting a smile to her left. “It’s great. Thanks.”

“Maybe having multiple beautiful woman flirting with you simultaneously is throwing you off,” Lincoln stage whispers, gleefully watching Lexa’s discomfort until she kicks his leg with the toe of her sneaker.

“I’m ignoring you now.”

“Oh good,” Lincoln laughs, “this should be a fun hang then.”

Lexa’s phone continues to alert her of Clarke’s persistence, or so she assumes by the rapidity at which it vibrates. Clarke never sends one, moderate length text when she could send 12 fragmented messages in quick succession. She reaches into her pocket to silence her notifications when Lincoln gently pokes a finger into her tricep.

“I’m just giving you a hard time. You know I don’t give a shit if you text Clarke while we hang out. She’s my buddy.”

“Why are you assuming I was texting with Clarke?” Lexa can hear the edge to her voice and reaches for a drink of her saison to lessen her defenses.

“Wild guess.”

Even Lexa is relatively powerless to Lincoln’s smirking charm and fights a smile of her own when their eyes meet.

“We’re debating movie selections for tomorrow,” she shares. “Her taste in film is generally abhorrent.”

“You two are always fighting about something.”

“Not intentionally. But, Clarke can be very … frustrating,” Lexa admits with a soft scowl into her beer. Lincoln laughs in response and she exhales. “We’re extremely different people.”

“Yeah, but differences are good. At least she keeps things interesting.”

Lexa barely manages not to choke on her beer, swallowing inelegantly. “That is one way to put it.”

“So, Costia is gone until Monday?”

Lexa tries not to let the abrupt change in conversation jar her. “Yeah.”

“Where’s the conference again?”

“D.C.” Lexa clears her throat, tracing a ring of condensation with her index finger against the bar. “Johns Hopkins.”

“How have things been? Any better?”

“Define better.”

Lincoln grimaces sympathetically at Lexa’s unmasked cynicism, and she exhales a cleansing breath. She’s determined not to make this yet another installment of airing her grievances of a stalled relationship, like so many times before. Lincoln is too kind and too selfless—she doesn’t want to take advantage of his friendship by making everything about herself all the time.

“Sorry,” she says softly. “I guess I don’t know how to determine if things are improving or not. But, we’re trying to be more realistic about our relationship at the very least. Talking a bit more. She’s been pursuing this research grant, which would mean almost a full year apart as she works abroad.”

“Damn.”

“I know. I took the news spectacularly well, as you might imagine.”

“Lost your shit a little bit?”

Lexa huffs a laugh and pulls on the sleeve of her sweater. “I think you accused me of being particularly homicidal that morning?”

Lincoln tips back in his stool with a laugh. “Ah, yes—I knew it.”

“Thank you for gloating at my expense,” Lexa responds drolly.

“Sorry.” Lincoln clears the laughter from his voice and attempts composure. “So, what’s the plan? Wait and see if her proposal is accepted?”

Lexa swallows down a mouthful of beer and runs a hand through her hair. “I think we have plenty to talk about even if she doesn’t get the grant, but yeah. We’re supposed to talk when she gets back.”

“That’s really good, Lex.” Lincoln’s gentle timbre is warm and reassuring, all prodding humor gone from his tone. “I mean, it’s tough, but avoidance is also generally unhelpful.”

“Yes, I’ve realized.” Lexa smiles over at him, feeling better already.

Lincoln then asks, “What about Clarke?” and her momentary sense of relief vanishes.  

She’s either gone extremely pale or is blushing fiercely because she feels both an icy chill and too hot all at once. She barely manages to respond without her voice shaking awkwardly. “What about Clarke?”

Lincoln is unfazed, lightly flicking his finger against her forehead as if they’re still thirteen and riding a noisy subway car. “She’s supposed to be your best friend, dummy. You should talk to her about this stuff.”

She’s never considered mentioning anything of significance about Costia to Clarke. It’s always seemed to Lexa, unsurprisingly, like a conflict of interest. Clarke will often inquire about Costia’s schooling, graciously concerned for her well-being within a demanding graduate program. In turn, Lexa offers her standard replies, never wanting to delve too far into their dynamic for fear it would reveal too much and ruin everything. Her life for the past several months has relied entirely on a delicate balance. Saying too much too soon could be perilous.    

“I don’t know. Maybe.”

“Hey guys, are we ready for another round?”

The unexpected sound of the bartender’s voice startles Lexa out of her thoughts, and she looks up to see that her beer is, in fact, empty.

“I’d like to try what he was drinking, actually,” Lexa tells her.

“You know what? I’m going to do the farmhouse,” Lincoln announces and slides their glasses closer to the woman standing in front of them.

She laughs easily while reaching for their empty glassware. It’s a nice laugh, ringing pleasantly in the quiet taproom. Even still, Lexa can’t help but register how much it pales in comparison to the addicting notes of Clarke’s distinctive laughter.

“Okay so two more of the same but in reverse,” the woman confirms. “Got it.”

As she leaves them, Lexa spins in her stool, determined to shift gears away from her indecisiveness. “Things with you and Octavia are going well?”

“Yeah,” Lincoln smiles. “Really great. She’s probably way too good for me, but I’m going to keep my mouth shut and hope she never figures it out.”

Lexa arches an eyebrow. “Do we need to sort through your abandonment trauma now? Because I thought we promised each other years ago that we would stop belittling our own self-worth.”

“No, no,” Lincoln laughs. “I’m good, I swear.” He shrugs a moment later and scratches his head. “Old habits.”

“There is no one too good for you, but if there were ever a perfect match out there, it’s Octavia.”  

The bartender returns with their drinks before Lincoln can respond, but he looks at her as if Lexa has just gifted him the cosmos and reaches out to squeeze her shoulder. Their next beer turns to idle chatter, old memories, sports, and shop talk. Lexa checks her messages while Lincoln is in the bathroom and finds that Clarke has not conceded any of her poorly formed arguments by even a fraction. The fiery retorts on her screen breed a smile so wide that she doesn’t manage to temper it by the time Lincoln returns.

If she were at liberty to be more honest, she would tell Clarke that it doesn’t matter what movies they watch. She’s just happy to be spending more time together. Instead, she slides her phone back into her pocket and stands beside her stool, stretching the stiff muscles of her back.

“You ready to go?”

Lexa smiles in response and nods.

They thank their bartender and exit the taproom into a setting sun. The foot traffic down Brookline Avenue is busier at the 5:00 hour as city workers rush towards their staggering commutes home. Lexa is lost in thought, still pondering her evening with Clarke the following day, when Lincoln abruptly pulls her down a side street with his hand wrapped around her elbow.

“Oh wait—this way.”

“Um, where the hell are we going?” Lexa asks when their course has been rerouted away from Lincoln’s car.

“I just decided I’m gonna take you for the best burger of your life. Storrow Drive is a parking lot right now anyway—it could take us hours to get home if we leave now. Let’s eat first and then drive back.”

In no rush to return to her empty apartment, Lexa shrugs easily. “Yeah, sure.” Being in Lincoln’s company is almost always preferable to anything else anyway.

After a moment’s pause, he nudges her with his elbow as they walk and is grinning stupidly when Lexa looks up at him. “If you really want to make Clarke mad, tell her we’re about to walk into Tasty Burger.”

Lexa has spent the better part of the year feeling unmoored by a lack of purpose. She has been draped in uncertainty and self-doubt after abandoning her life in New York. And while she still feels plagued by indecision, she’s also grateful for the choices she’s made that have brought her here, walking in stride with an old friend.  

She returns Lincoln’s smile and reaches for her phone.  

:::

[jacquelinep21]

(I wrote this email to my grandmother, aunt, and uncle last week and felt pretty good with how it turned out so decided to publish it here.) 

Friday, May 1st, 2020

Coucou !

I’ve been wanting to write you for a while now, I even started a draft and wrote about ¾’s of it, had to stop to make dinner, and then never finished it. Maybe I was overthinking how I wanted to get the writing perfect when I should’ve just sent something to say hello, give you an update, and check-in that all was well with you. Mieux vaut tard que jamais.

How to describe everything and nothing that has happened since mid-March? Both on a personal level and on a “what’s the situation in France” level?

Personally, I’ve been cooking, both familiar recipes, and trying new ones such as Chickpea Curry, Mushroom-Stuffed Eggplant, One-Pan Wine Braised Chicken with Artichoke Hearts, Shakshuka, Spanish Tortilla, Roasted Red Pepper Cheese Toast, Peanut Butter Chile Sauce drizzled over broccoli and rice, Butternut Squash & Shallot Hash w/Poached Eggs, and a couple others. Let me admit, some were successes, others...will have to be adjusted and reattempted. Not to mention there are days when not having a dishwasher gets to be exhausting.

I still have multiple school projects that I have been working on, both group and individual. My classes were already supposed to end mid-April even before this all started, so it didn’t change much and most classes didn’t have any online classes, as the projects were more important and already put in place. I have three more to turn in before grades are due mid-May, and now the first part of my thesis is due one month later, at the end of June. Productivity has been difficult, as there are days that I feel like I need to do things for me, rather than sitting on my computer switching between reading the news and trying to do school work, but I’ve gotten a little better at it. My job, checking guests into apartments, and working in the office, is obviously non-existent, and likely will be until at least September, but because of the government's chômage partiel or temporary/partial unemployment of over 10 million people in France, I’m still getting 90% of my salary, which I am very thankful for.

What I have been doing for pleasure these days is listening to podcasts, my favorite being Spilled Milk, which I discovered in September when I was doing the grape harvest, a comedy show about food recorded in Seattle. I was taking a photograph or two a day with my dad’s 1984 Minolta 35mm film camera but ran out of film and can’t find a viable way to get more. I’ve been reading every day, finished two books so far, and have started a third. We’ve been watching movies and TV shows, such as Breaking Bad, the Jason Bourne trilogies, Charade, Star Wars, and others I’ve put off watching until now. Something I never thought I would do was a virtual dance/fitness classes but they have been a great source of dopamine and just physical movement. There are also weekly video chats with either Benjamin or I’s friends, which has been especially nice when we can reunite multiple time zones all in one call. My friend that works at Politico’s audio department asked if I’d be interested in recording an audio-diary twice a week as part of a project they’re working on of different people’s experiences during lockdown so I’ve been contributing to that (though not sure what’s become of the project so far). The most coincidental thing that has happened to me during confinement is changing the channel on the TV maybe the second week into the lockdown, as the Prime Minister’s press conference was ending (otherwise we hardly ever watch the TV), to a different channel only to see someone that looked vaguely familiar, and then see the street we live on. We soon figured out the people across the street we had seen filming once or twice were making a documentary on the lockdown. I contacted them after we finished watching the episode and they asked if I was interested in being interviewed. So that happened, haha. I don’t believe it’s possible to stream the episode outside of Europe so I’ve included the video here, it’s in English.

There are of course the daily musings outside the window to see what the neighbors across the street are doing or what is happening on the street below. Avenue de Saint-Ouen has calmed since this all began but it still is busier than I would’ve expected, both with cars and people, not resembling photos you may have seen of an eerily empty Paris. Sundays are the exception, when I can almost clearly hear what someone is saying on their balcony across the way, where the joggers' loud steps hitting the pavement echoes as they try to reach home before their 10am curfew, and the church bells ring telling us the time. The typical characters I can see on their balconies every day include the bald man that drinks his cup of coffee while smoking his morning cigarette, the retired man on the top floor that tends to his potted herbs that dangle over the balcony railing, or his neighbors that have two young boys that run back and forth. The weather has been clearer than any Parisian spring I’ve seen and the temperatures even got to the high 70’s last week but have now dropped and the clouds are back. We are allowed to walk for up to one hour within a 1km radius of our address, as long as we have a form, now available to download on our phones, filled out, otherwise there can be fines, though I have only seen police officers stop people twice.

So what is the situation in France right now? As of Thursday night, 24,376 people have died from Covid-19 in France, 26,283 people are currently hospitalized (551 less than the day before) and 4,019 are in the ICU (188 less than the day before). On May 11th, the lockdown will be lifted to a certain extent, but many restrictions will still be in place. Starting May 7th each département, kind of like a county, will either be classified red or green, depending on multiple factors, and this can change the severity of the rules after May 11th. Preschools, elementary schools, and daycares can reopen, on a voluntary basis by each family, so those in need that cannot do online learning and depend on the meals can return to school under certain hygiene measures. Public transportation will increase slightly but not back to the normal frequency, masks will be obligatory, every other seat must be left empty, employeurs are encouraged the adjust hours of employees that have to return to work to avoid rush hour, and that those not commuting to and from work should avoid public transportation during these hours. We will be able to leave the house without filling out a form, as long as it’s less than 100km from our address. Farther than this (62 miles) we will need to have a legitimate reason, such as professional or imperative family needs. No meetings, private or public, of more than ten people. Individual sports any time of day (currently in Paris jogging isn’t permitted between 10am and 7pm) but no team sports. Libraries and small museums may reopen while abiding by hygiene procedures. Parks may reopen but if considered dangerous, such as in Paris, they may remain closed. Most businesses can reopen, except restaurants, bars, cafés, large museums, movie theaters, concert venues, or theaters, while controlling the number of people in the business and customers may be turned away if they aren’t wearing a mask. Farmers markets may reopen as well. Malls may or may not reopen, depending on their size. Working from home is still strongly encouraged. The government hopes to test 700,000 people a week, though who can get tested isn’t clear. If you test positive you must self isolate for 14 days either at your residence or an allocated hotel, and teams of people will attempt to get in contact with those who may have been infected by said persons to get tested. An app is also in development to track this but is also highly controversial and will have to be voted on by parliament. Masks will be distributed by employeurs, by schools, to nonprofits for those in need, social action centers, and La Poste has set up a website where they can be bought, the government paying for part of the costs. The second phase in which things could change is June 2nd.

Voilà, I think that’s everything. I would love to hear from you when you can write back. Miss you and thinking of you.

Love,

Melissa

P.S. Some recent Articles/Blogs/Newsletters/Podcasts that are Paris related:

David Lebovitz's May 2020 Newsletter

When Cookies Fly and Other Tales of Staying Entertained During Quarantine

Lettre Recommandé: Notes from France by Lauren Collins

Podcast: Documenting confinement in Paris, checking in with the French psyche, May Day history (interview with the couple making the documentary that I was featured in briefly among other interesting things.)

The New Paris Podcast: Paris in Confinement

The Earful Tower Podcast: What does Paris look like in lockdown? (he has recorded several episodes about what has been going on, this is just a more recent one, light-hearted)

The Street That Still Offers Paris Hope

Denuded of Tourists, Paris Reveals Its Old Beating Heart

France 24's English Coverage of the France Lockdown (a great news outlet in English with a more French perspective of whats going on in France with articles and videos)

[comicteaparty]

June 13th-June 19th, 2020 Creator Babble Archive

The archive for the Creator Babble chat that occurred from June 13th, 2020 to June 19th, 2020.  The chat focused on the following question:

What is your physical and digital workspace like when you’re working on your story?

🌈ERROR404 🌈

LOL it really depends on what stage I'm in of the process - My storyboarding space is at home, as comfortable as I can be, a beer and some food at the ready and pure silence. The cats have to be freshly fed, otherwise I'll be harassed and lose my headspace entirely LOL. I usually work on my story boards digitally, just at a very small scale, with my script/outline on my computer and working on my ipad! The double screen helps a LOT, although i would just print out the script if I had access to a printer, haha. When I'm working on the actual page itself, it's a very different story. I usually just try and work on it in tiny little batches during the day when I'm stuck at home, and usually work around the animals as best i can, lmao. Truthfully, I really prefer to be in a coffee shop when I'm working on finishing pages, it makes me so much more productive than i am in this house with so many things to take care of right in front of me, but, obviously, that's a bit difficult to do these days. ;; I usually reserve food and drink until after I pass a milestone in inking/sketching to help motivate me to keep going for as much as I can before taking a break, and I need some kind of music or video playing in the background to keep myself from being absolutely bored out of my mind. My shading process, since it's in black and white, is very easy and i can finish it in one setting, easy, no matter what I'm working with. I also work digitally for my pages, of course, although I don't need more than my ipad and clip studio for it!

DaeofthePast

freshly fed cats

🌈ERROR404 🌈

They are BEASTS when hungry, the little bastards (love them)

I may only work in peace when they're post-food napping lmao

DaeofthePast

we only have one, but same

LadyLazuli (Phantomarine)

I work almost entirely in the corner of my IKEA couch at home I used to work at a proper desk with a Cintiq, but when I switched to Procreate on an iPad, I migrated to the couch and surrounded myself with a nest of clothes and blankets and books and... here I am, bein' cozy. With terrible posture But when I was between jobs last year, I did rent a little coworking space down the street so I could get out of my pajamas and go get comic stuff done there. It was a godsend. I like drawing at my favorite coffee shop every so often too, but I tend to hide my work while I draw, and there, everyone can look over my shoulder The coworking space had a tall artist desk that was rarely used, so I often grabbed that one. Not cheap, but to stave off cabin fever, heck yes, worth it.

🌈ERROR404 🌈

Ahhh I've been really thinking about getting a studio space one of these days I really shouldn't rn, with my finances as they are, but I could REALLY make use of one recently

LadyLazuli (Phantomarine)

I loved the space I used last year. They recently had to close for... current-event reasons... and are going to reopen with all sorts of plexiglass barriers between the desks I feel so bad for them. Good studio spaces are wonderful, I would support them again if I ever was out of a job!

🌈ERROR404 🌈

it's good they've found ways to make it safer, though!

carcarchu

My old workspace was in the basement of my home in canada and it was always perpetually freezing even in the summer and i was frequently visited by spiders so my current workspace is a huge improvement in that regard. I do miss my old ergonomic desk chair though. I'm definitely not the kind of person who can draw in bed or on the couch. I need to be in workmode and having a designated space just for that is necessary for me to get in the right headspace for that.

DaeofthePast

my workspace rn is just my desk with my laptop and my drawing tablet. my laptop is stacked on top of a pile of books so i can see the screen (otherwise my tablet blocks my line of sight). it's kinda simple

chalcara [Nyx+Nyssa]

Depends. I have a Cintiq Mobile Studio, so I can draw pretty much every where and sometimes in the oddest position, but most of the time I am on my desk with the cintiq hooked up to a second monitor so I don't have to look down so much.(edited)

Holmeaa - working on WAYFINDERS

For Wayfinders: Thumbnails are somewhere cozy and the only physical work. Me and Q sit and plan them out together. The rest of wayfinders are made on Photoshop, and flat colors in clip paint studio. In the world I would love a nice studio place in an office with others. During corentine I have been working from home, and I am not that good at it, being quite the extrovert. Before corentine I was in a artist residency where I worked on Wayfinders which had a workstation and all the programs we could need. It is so nice and me and Q are going to return there when it opens up again!

Miranda

I have an iPad so usually on the couch, cozied up with coffee and pillows and blankets. But sometimes at the table. But usually on the couch like the gremlin I am

FeatherNotes(Krispy)

I have a large drafting table, a mini drafting table, and a lapdesk in my papasan when we ink/draw! Toning and letters are all done on the desktop in its own space

Miranda

I need to get a good lap desk. But that sounds like a grand setup!

Eightfish (Puppeteer)

My first time hearing about a lapdesk

Omg I need one

FeatherNotes(Krispy)

They are the best things ever Mine has just the pencil holder !(some come with cup holders and its a waste of space imo)

Joichi [Hybrid Dolls]

Wow I like your setup of the drafting tables

FeatherNotes(Krispy)

I wanna show pics of them....if im allowed in this chat?

Joichi [Hybrid Dolls]

I hope so, I'm not sure which channel we can post studio photos at? I did see some did before?

FeatherNotes(Krispy)

Ill post in shop talk since creator babble gets archived

Tuyetnhi (Only In Your Dreams!)

my current space is uh.... a bit better than my last one. I used to work on an old writers desk for a decade and I did most of my comic work sitting there cramped up with my desktop taking most of the space. Now I have an L shaped desk where I have my desktop on the shorter end. The longer end it's my pen, pencils, and watercolor stuff. my display tablet occupy the space at times so switching from digital and traditional without worrying about setup hassle is a lot better than what I dealt with before lol.

I'm glad the days I had to curl up and draw with no privacy are long gone now

kayotics

I’ve got a little drafting table where I draw all my comic pages. I’m messy with my pens so they’re kind of strewn about until I start to lose them. Then I put them back. I’m not particularly neat. I spend most of the comic process off the computer, so most of my digital work is just on an iPad where I can sit anywhere. I try to keep good lighting around my drafting table and there’s always loose eraser shavings all over.

Natasha Berlin (Pot of Gold)

I got myself a lil corner desk by the dining table. Not as well-lit as I'd like, but it's decently ergonomic and I started putting posters on my wall Plus I can leave work mindset easily by turning off my computer and forgetting about the dark corner in the dining room XD(edited)

sssfrs (JOE IS DEAD)

My desk is really sloppy and covered in all kinds of junk. I have a harmonica, a ball of yarn, a bunch of ink bottles, etc on my desk. I have my sketchbook under my tablet and usually a notebook somewhere for writing. My tablet sits to the right of my laptop (on top of sketchbook) while I'm not using it and when I'm using it it goes over my computer keyboard. I sometimes have a glass of water or some food sitting to the lefthand side

Eightfish (Puppeteer)

The only thing I wanna share about my workspace is this

once i spent over three hours looking for that damned pen

never again

🌈ERROR404 🌈

Ajkdhfkjs the models for hte magazine im crying

Cronaj (Whispers of the Past)

Oh my God

shadowhood (SunnyxRain)

mad giggling

Deo101 [Millennium]

youre gonna manage to lose the string

Tuyetnhi (Only In Your Dreams!)

omg

Eightfish (Puppeteer)

i know in my heart deo is right but still i hope

Cronaj (Whispers of the Past)

You should weld a metal chain to it

Eightfish (Puppeteer)

Watch me lose the whole tablet

Cronaj (Whispers of the Past)

Oh nooo

I believe in you!

TaliePlume

My workspace is a black table with a white, yellow, blue and green tablecloth with 3 black chairs. It's next to the kitchen. On it, is my laptop and the left side is my clipboard, 3 blue folders full of writing. Then above it, is 3 sketchbooks and another blue folder from a class that I took in community college.

June 16, 2020

sagaholmgaard

I have one long desk at almost three meters. On the left side is all my coffee and tea supplies, in the middle is my work space and on the right is my dining table xD I get everything done from there, despite having a mobilestudio so I COULD sit anywhere and work, lol. It's a blessing during holiday seasons to be able to bring it everywhere, but at some I like my designated working space. Although I am moving in a few weeks, so who knows what my new workspace will be

Moral_Gutpunch

My workspace is anywhere I can draw or write. It's more of a "Will I be interrupted over something petty or stupid" issue than space. Not that I don't want more space.

Mitzi (Trophallaxis)

My workspace is a big, broken corner desk I managed to lug out of an old apartment when it was gonna be trashed. Before then, I'd just draw in bed. I don't remember, but I'm pretty sure the folding chair I sit at is a similar affair. It's got a Dollar General throw pillow on it so I can at least say I'm trying to save my back. The top of the desk is a mess of mostly old bottles and cans, pencils, incense ash, and my old tarot deck. I love this setup dearly. This is the first time I've ever had my own desk space, much less a space I can decorate or leave as messy as I want. Got my own art up on the walls with sticky tack and all! Also the cat's scratching post is directly behind me, because we've learned the cat won't use it unless it's as in the way as possible. What can ya do, lol.

Cronaj (Whispers of the Past)

Oh cats...

Desnik

I got spoiled with an adjustable desk. It is six feet long, and has a whiteboard top for noodling with dry erase markers

my main computer is set up on an adjustable stand so it floats over the desk, and then I have my cintiq, which we tried to mount on a similar stand but then it was just too heavy

I keep my dice collection nearby because fidgeting helps think things through sometimes

and rolling to make odd decisions never hurts

lately during the quarantine I've been sharing the office with my spouse so we've had to establish rules over when it's okay to bug each other(edited)

oh yeah and we also have a whiteboard installed in the office, and it rules!(edited)

Shizamura 🌟 O Sarilho

Mine is pretty simple: I have a laptop that's long stopped being portable and is now mostly just sitting at my desk at all times and a 19 inch Ugee as my display. I usually keep a lot of stuff on top of my desk, but it's mostly just a mess because I have been using it for work too for a while now

Cronaj (Whispers of the Past)

I suppose I'll talk about my setup too :) My main setup is where I do digital art. I share an office with my SO, so we both have workspaces on opposite walls from each other. I work on a corner desk that holds my beefy computer, two monitors, and a Huion Kamvas GT-191. That's where I draw my comic and pretty much everything else done digitally. Ngl, it's a mess right now. I have comic notes and location floor plans in sketchbooks and DnD character sheets spread out all over the surface, and random pens and sticky notes. In the corner of the room, we have a nice large-format printer where I produce prints for conventions. I actually sketch my pages on an iPad pro in Procreate, so during the sketch phase, sometimes I'll just bundle up on my couch and do it, or before quarantine, sometimes I'd sketch on the go. My other workspace (which hasn't gotten much love as of late tbh) is a drafting table in the corner of our living room. I keep a tabletop easel on it and my Copic markers, as well as whatever I'm working on at the moment. (RN it's some ink washes.) The drawers hold all my ink, pencils, erasers, etc. Next to the drafting table is where I keep all my large charcoal, graphite, and oil pastel drawings (mostly school projects), and my large paintings. Other than that, I have a nifty little cart where I keep painting supplies :) I will say, this setup is by far an enormous improvement from my previous setups.

[heytheregreeneyes]

How come you gave up on 'Something Just Like This'? I loved that fic

So here’s the thing...

I haven’t given up on Something Just Like This. I actually still love that fic dearly and very much intend to finish it (and I need to do it soon before Tyler steals all of my ideas like he did with Jenna’s pregnancy reveal *shakes fist at Tyler*).

As you all know, this past year I hadn’t felt much like writing and I couldn’t figure out why... until the other night at work. I was sitting at my desk, staring off into space and thinking about dialogue for the current chapter when it hit me like a freight train why I haven’t been writing. I had had an epiphany!

My eyes literally got wide as I sat straight up, gasped and literally said “Oh my God,” out loud. It was so obvious, I couldn’t believe I hadn’t thought of it before. And the first thing I did was text @ohfrickfanfic (who agrees with me), even tho it was somewhere around 3:25 in the morning. So if you wanna hear the story behind the fic, buckle in kids, cause it’s gonna be a long one, and it’s gonna get deep.

So as you all know, I started writing Something Just Like This in July of 2017. I was 4 months pregnant with my 3rd surrobaby, who was due in December on Christmas Eve. I was writing as fast as my fingers could fly and was banging out chapters probably once a week. Sometimes twice.  

December 12, 2017 - SURROBABY IS BORN! After this, chapters obviously slowed down so that I could pump milk and get my life back to somewhat normal again.

Six months later, in June of 2018, I finally reached the end of my six-month contract for pumping breastmilk for Surrobaby #3 and I started working at my current job at the hospital. I am a CNA and it just so happens that this hospital is where all the surrogate babies were born IRL. I have been super lucky and I now work in that very department, which is where I have wanted to work all my life!  Serious life goals, guys. But as you all know, nurses work insane shifts and long hours. I work overnights, 13 hours at a time, and so writing slowed down even more since I was now working my first job outside of the home in about 9 years. For the next few months, chapters are still being posted, but much more slowly.  

Things are moving along great... I’m still writing, albeit a bit more slowly, but chapters are still being posted 

April 2018 comes and my grandpa dies... my emotions took a huge hit. I had grown up very close to my grandpa and I couldn’t write happy things when I was in such a sad place. It was rough. 

Writing slows even more over the summer, but I am still writing, still posting, still planning, still rough drafting, still plotting scenes, and still writing dialogue.

September 2, 2018 - I meet HIM. I don’t want to give out his real name, so we’ll just call him William. I will never ever forget that night. I wasn’t even supposed to be at work that night; it was my night off but they had sent out a text that they needed help, so I picked up an extra shift. Around midnight I got a call that they needed me to pass off my patients so that I could go down to the ER and be a 1:1 for a patient suffering a panic attack. I gather up my things, head down to the ER, get my assignment, go to his room, and...

That was that. He had been sobbing and when he looked up and saw me, he suddenly took one last big breath and stopped crying. He calmed. We got to talking over the course of the night and it was like we had known each other for millennia. We were immediately comfortable with each other, had each other's sense of humor, shared similar life experiences, you name it. This was the night I met my best friend.

He was still hardcore in the middle of a panic attack and didn’t like to be touched, but somehow I was allowed to touch. He openly admits to how much he despises hospitals and no one was allowed in the room, but somehow was calm when I was there. Do you believe in fate? Cause I do.

A week goes by and we now are either talking/texting/video chatting/instant messaging all day and all night, about anything and everything. Our phone calls go on for HOURS and often would end up talking all through the night. Turns out that he has severe anxiety and hasn’t left his house in over two years. Neither of us could believe how quickly we connected and bonded, but the new friendship was a blessing for him and me both. Because of his anxiety and tendency to call/text/message me if a panic attack hit, he earned his own ringtone, text notification sound, and custom volume so that if he called or texted in the middle of the night, or if I was out in a busy area, it would wake me up or ring loud enough so that I could stop and answer. 

September 18, 2018 - Two weeks after meeting William, my world gets turned upside down. I lose my mom. She was only 52 years old and died very unexpectedly from sudden liver death. I was DEVASTATED.  William was there for me throughout the whole thing, something I didn’t expect since we had just met barely two weeks earlier. In fact, one of the last things my mom ever said to me was “make sure you take care of that sweet boy”. I’ll never forget it. 

After my mom died I didn’t feel like writing for a long time. Again, it’s hard to write happy things when you feel so sad and shocked. 

So this past year goes by and things level to a norm. William’s depression and anxiety waxes and wanes. We’d hang out in person at his house sometimes, mostly just making fun of each other and enjoying each other’s company. We still talk and text multiple times every day, and had gotten into a habit of sleeping while on the phone.

Then mid-October this year, something changed. We still do all of our normal stuff but he had started to say that he hated not being able to leave his house, hated the way he felt, hated not being able to do stuff, felt like a failure and a coward, etc. All things he has said before, but this time was just hitting him so much worse.

The night of October 22nd is when things really changed. To me, that’s the day I had breast reduction surgery, but that’s also the day communication between us stopped. He stopped calling, he stopped texting, we no longer messaged or chatted on discord... He was gone. 

Let me tell you that this felt exactly like another death. How could I lose someone I was so close to? Did I say something wrong, did I do something wrong, did I make him feel bad, did I scare him somehow... all these questions were running thru my head, constantly, throughout the days.

One night I texted him that we needed to talk so he called and sort of, got onto me. He said that I did nothing wrong, that I didn’t say or do anything, that he just couldn’t handle things very well at the moment and he would see texts but just didn’t have it in him to reply. He lacked the energy to call and carry on a conversation. didn’t want to do anything but be by himself. He told me that he loves me and that he misses me, but this is just how it gets sometimes. it just be like that.  

I understood. Depression fucking sucks and it just sucks the soul right out of you sometimes. I was there for him but right now, he just needed alone time... something he hadn’t required in over a year... and something I definitely was not used to. 

So there I sit this past Saturday night at work, thinking about my fic and writing dialogue in my head like I had been the last few weeks when it hits me. 

‘Oh my God,’ I thought to myself. ‘I just figured out why I write fic and why I had stopped for a bit... until now.’   

IT FILLS A HOLE OF LONELINESS AND LONGING!

I texted @ohfrickfanfic and she replied, “you were lacking male attention so you made up for it by writing fic but then you met William and he filled the void but now he’s not giving you as much attention so you feel you need to fill that void again.”

I’ll be damned if she’s not 100% right. I had love. I had someone who loved me, someone who genuinely cared about me and for me, asked how I was, loved my family, wanted to know what I was up to, took interest in my life, valued my opinions, asked my advice and took it to heart, called me his, called me pet names, gave me hugs and kissed my forehead. 

When it suddenly stopped, ngl I cried quite a few times. I was heartbroken. I went into my own depression and that is when I got the want to start writing again. I’ve always wanted to write and finish SJLT, but now the urge is there. 

Things are slowly getting better. He calls every now and then... more often all the time. He teases me and texts sometimes and sends me messages on snapchat, just not NEARLY as often as before. It’s been over a month since I’ve seen his face and I hate it, but I can see my best friend slowly coming back to life. It’s tough because I miss him so fucking much, but he’s coming around and trying to battle his anxiety. 

As far as the fic goes, I NEVER gave up on Something Just Like This and it WILL be a finished fic if it kills me. As it stands now, there are only about 3-4 more chapters to go before the fic is finished, and I would like to get it out before the new year... again, before Tyler Joseph steals all of my ideas that I’ve had planned for Josh for over two years. *shakes another fist at Tyler*

I really do appreciate all of you sticking with me and the fic for this long. Allowing me to grieve the loss of my loved ones and asking for updates on the fic... it lets me know that you like it and that my work is wanted.

I won’t let you down. 

[canyouhearthelight]

The Miys, Ch. 14

Author’s Note:  I know it has been a little bit since I posted last.  There is a lot of stuff going on in my life right now, so it has been difficult to focus and give this story the attention it deserves.  The lovely Tyche has sent me her next chapter, however, so I have edited that and am posting it tonight.  This chapter is from Tyche’s perspective and is relaying her story.  Any editing errors are solely my own, and please don’t hesitate to inbox me if you notice something.

If you want to, you can skip down to the story below the cut.  I just want to give everyone an idea of what is going on with my life right now.  

For those of you who don’t follow @ritualistic-raven, my mother has quit two jobs this year with no savings, no safety net, nothing to keep her going long term.  The first job was one she had been in for eleven years, and she quit it as soon as her tax return came in (I think it was February? It was the beginning of the year). She lived off her tax return, without even trying to find a new job, until early June.  She found a new job in mid-July, and quit that one in September.  My sister a full time college student, and had not been working while going to school, so this was the only income they had.  There is also my nephew living with them.

My mother still has not found a job, and we are coming up on December. Toward the end of October, they (my mother, my sister, and my nephew) moved into my spare bedroom...  That’s right.  Me, my spouse, my sister, mother, and nephew all living in a just-a-hair-under 1100 sq ft house.  It is making everyone involved more than a lot bit stressed out.

My sister started a good job last week, but it is currently just seasonal (although there is a chance to go permanent after the seasonal gig is over).  I’m not even sure if my mother is still looking for jobs, TBH.  I work 42 hours a week, my spouse works 40-45, and we both have 45 minute commutes one way.  If she doesn’t, I have no idea when they will be able to get their own place - I feel terrible that my sister is sleeping on my couch or an air mattress in my office, and that my nephew has literally nothing to do at my house because my house is not very kid-friendly.  Fairly kid-proof, but not kid friendly.

I spend an inordinate amount of my time angry, depressed, overwhelmed, and exhausted.  I have difficulty sleeping, difficulty focusing on work, and resent my mother so much right now I could scream at her every time she crosses my path.  Add to all of that the fact that she has apparently forgotten how to cook (which she has done, and done well, for a living, on several occaisions?), we just made it through Thanksgiving here in the States, and Christmas holidays are right around the corner.  I’m also preparing for a business trip, trying to train a new person to help do my job, etc.

All that said, I am trying very hard to still write. I know it doesn’t always show on here, but that’s because sometimes I work on a fanfiction I have not even started posting yet, sometimes I am working on my novel-in-progress (which at this point has become something Brian Griffin would be proud of), and sometimes I am working on Destiel and Sabriel Secret Santa stuff.

TL;DR: Thank you for being patient with me, I have A Lot going on right now, and I promise The Miys is not on hiatus.

I stood on a platform in front of a large number of my fellow humans. The lights were dimmed, for the sake of my nerves, but I could still see several of the front rows thanks to the light from the video screens behind me. I felt like a mega-millionaire with a groundbreaking statement.

There was no form of microphone, no podium, not even a glass of water for my comfort. Everyone would still hear me, however, thanks to the Miys linking the translators.

I don’t know how long I stood in silence, trying to shake the nerves I expertly concealed. My feet were planted, my fingers woven in front my hips, shoulders back, and chin up. I appeared to be taking in the crowd. I was used to preparing any presentations. I was used to having a visual to gesture to or explain factually.

Here, I had nothing but my own history.

“Okay, Tyche. Deep breath. You know how to tell an engaging story. You can do this.” I thought to myself.

I rolled my shoulders in preparation and finally spoke.

“Thank you all for joining me. This hall has been reserved for those brave enough to share their stories of what they experienced after the End began. This is why we are here now. Many of you have met already, but for those of you who haven’t, please allow me to introduce myself.

My name is Tyche. I like dark clothes, fluffy cats, coffee, and swearing.”

A few in the audience chuckled.

“I am a very serious person when needed. When I don’t have to be so serious, I am aloof to those who don’t know me and social to those who do. A bit like a cat, I suppose.

“You may be able to hear an odd French accent when I speak. On Earth, I was born in the United States of America but worked very hard to move to Paris. I spent years learning the language before I ever boarded a plane, and my accent shifted a bit towards French from that alone. I spent several years in France, honing my pronunciation in order to better communicate with those whom I worked with. I worked in executive administration for a very large financial institution after bustin’ my ass to get a middle-level administration job working with my sister.

“A few years after I moved to Paris and began buying my flat, I was approached by a smaller company. The pay wasn’t as good and they weren’t globally known, but I had apparently chatted with a family member of the owner one day and my occupation came up. I had been recommended to help keep this company from going under after a fiasco left them with no one to run the accounts.

“I was reluctant to leave my comfortable job until I could at least straighten out this smaller company’s bookkeeping. I’ll be honest, it was a mess.

“I had drafted my letter of resignation a few nights before the Launch. I was preparing to hand it in; I just had to convince myself I would be happier this way. Everyone was buzzing about who would be leaving Earth and if we would ever see them again, so on and so forth. I knew the CEO of my financial institution was leaving, but I didn’t feel bad about it. It was a corporation, after all, run by a board of directors.  Still, I kept my poor sister up late one night as she talked me into doing what would make me happiest, even if it meant leaving the company we both worked for.

“The night came and everyone was watching the synchronized streaming of the Launch. Twelve ships. Twelve launch sites around the globe. Faster than light travel! And, of course, only the rich could afford to go.

“We saw it. We all saw it. Well, most of us. It was declared an international holiday, wasn’t it? So many of us sat around on our devices, streaming this brand-new technology being launched with paying customers, civilians, on board. It was momentous! It was historical!

“But then when the ships launched… Well, they blew up. There just isn’t any other way to describe it. The ships had been sabotaged to explode in the atmosphere at the same moment. The feeds cut right after we saw the start of the explosions and if you were outside or near a window? You probably saw the light race across the sky, rippling the air as it went. Then everything went dark.”

I paused for a moment. I could hear murmurs which I assumed were people telling their neighbors where they were when it happened.

Struggling to continue, I cleared my throat again. My vision was being overwhelmed by the past. My brain had thrown me into a visual flashback. I forced myself to narrate what I was seeing, telling my story as my brain recalled it.

I had taken my wine glass and tablet out to the balcony of my small Parisian flat. I was four levels from the ground and could see the lights of the city from where I lived. Even the Eiffel Tower could be seen here, as it twinkled in the distance. The view was everything I had worked so hard to achieve.

I was overwhelmed at that moment with the feeling I was finally, truly home. Drinking wine on my Parisian balcony at 4am was what I truly wanted. Having a fantastic job on top of that, allowing me to be relatively stress free? Absolute freedom, aside from the sound of my mother snoring in the other bedroom.  Headphones on, I listened with minor interest until the countdown began. I could hear several of my neighbors counting down as if it was the New Year, making me laugh in delight.

« Dix ! Neuf ! Huit ! Sept ! Six ! Cinq ! Quatre ! Trois ! Deux ! Un ! »

The buildings and streets erupted with cheering as the ships set off from their launchpads, ready to embark on a journey like no other. I had mixed feelings about it. Fantastic new technology is amazing, but the richest of the rich being the only civilians? I was thrilled about this new age of space travel and tried to focus on that, pressing the negative feelings to the back of my mind.

I was pondering what discoveries would be made along their journey and how long we would have to wait to find out when suddenly the crowds fell silent. The screen of my tablet was shaky for a moment before the livestream simply ended.

Something was wrong. What was that color? It only last for half a moment before the stream ended, but it looked like…. I had seen this before. It was a fireball. But there was an odd color to it. Orange and red and white, but there was something else.

Before I could put any more thought into it, a light rippled across the sky, warping any clouds in its path. It was like a shockwave of light. It was unreal and worse than that, unknown. I gazed out in the direction it went and saw everything flicker, then go black.

The City of Lights was dark.

It all happened so quickly. I’m placing my glass on my balcony table with my tablet, sitting down a few minutes before launch, and then watching everything go dark. Less than ten minutes.

A few fearful screams could be heard, but we knew sunrise was soon. There was already panic, however, as more and more people shouted to their neighbors and even strangers that their phones and flashlights weren’t working. Cars wouldn’t start, the metro rail wouldn’t move, and we saw no airplanes flash overhead. We waited for emergency vehicles. Police and firefighters. “Where are they?” we kept asking each other. No sirens, no lights, no sign of help.

As the day went on, we realized more and more things wouldn’t work. It didn’t take long for us to reach the conclusion that anything that had been powered by electricity, even batteries, was useless. Looting began around midday, taking advantage of the lack of police vehicles and security systems. It didn’t matter what the store was, it was at risk. Electronics were especially popular, as people assumed the power would be restored at some point.

We marched on the government buildings. We demanded answers! What the hell happened? When will it be fixed? Tell us!

Our officials were as baffled as we were. No one had answers, because the people who would have the answers couldn’t communicate or travel with ease to let the officials know.

“You have to wait. We have to go to our scientists. We have to go to them to find out why,”

Tension rose higher and higher. Insulin pumps had failed in the flash. Pacemakers failed as well, and families were outraged that there was no help. At any moment, people would die.

The horror struck many who had not considered how much we rely on technology to keep us alive.

“What about hospitals!” Many started shouting to no one in particular.

I remember leaving the scene, in a state of shock from the realizations, and returning to my flat. “France riots at the drop of a hat. I’m not French. I don’t want to get caught in the crossfire.” I told my cat as I stuffed a few clothes and some bread and water in a bag. I knew how cliché it was, but I also knew I wanted to pack light. I grabbed my duffel bag to shove more supplies into. Candles, matches, a book, a few knives… “Maybe more food.” A few more bottles of water and a wrapped cut of cheese really weighed it down, but I couldn’t skip nourishment. I was leaving Paris, on foot, not sure how long it would take me to get anywhere in this country. My mother refused to leave. “I’m sixty-four,” she declared like it was some great revelation. “I refuse to let some idiots run me out of my home.”

Technically, the flat was mine, in my name only, but I knew that tone and wasn’t about to try to argue.  She wanted to stay, she could stay.  I was taking Mac and getting the hell out of there. I wrapped in a thick coat and two scarves, put on my good boots, and then clipped the walking harness around the cat before remembering my passport. Just in case.

The click of the door behind me was heartbreaking. Was I ever going to come back? Would life restore itself in a few days? My feeling in my gut said no. It said the flash was catastrophic. It said to not get my hopes up.

“At least there’s still enough Arkansas in me to be able to navigate with the sun and stars,” I told my upset feline companion. He just squawked at me plaintively.

I headed south, toward the country. I’d go south for as long as I could.

I lost count of how many days it had been by the time I reached a small village in smelling-distance of the salty ocean. There had been no power anywhere. I had been able to stop here and there, begging people for a bit of food, just enough to make it another day. Everyone was scared of strangers. That wasn’t the French way, but this new reality made everyone paranoid. We’ve all seen those films.

The last town name I could remember is Millau. I ended up somewhere past that. A kind woman named Sandrine said she saw the flash and had been worried criminals would come.

“I’m too exhausted to hurt anyone who isn’t trying to hurt me,” I told her. I had seen very few people along my trek, but none of them seemed to think the lady with the leashed cat was worth bothering.

Sandrine offered me shelter and food from the gardens that were popular there. Aside from the candles and oil lanterns everywhere, it was hard to imagine that life here ever had electricity. It was peaceful and still very organized. The adults would speak in hushed voices. Theorizing what had happened, but no one could agree on one answer.

I stayed there for several months, never finding out what the source of the seemingly-permanent blackout was. Things were going well. This small village was rustic enough to function with little issue the entire time I was there.

Suddenly, it all came to an end. We had seen smoke off in the distance for a few days, but when we woke one morning, it was to the sound of screaming and panicking. The fire had spread overnight thanks to rough winds. It was engulfing the village.

I never want to see that again. So many people couldn’t escape. Many had been asleep when the fire took them. The sight of it was too horrific. Sandrine told me to take one of her horses and go. She would be close behind. Since I never unpacked all of my things, I grabbed my bags and rushed toward the horse pen. I was shaking as I dressed one of the horses, but managed to get everything cinched up. I ran for another saddle and bit when her house collapsed. A tree nearby, weakened by drought, had caught fire and fallen. Sandrine was inside.

I hate feeling helpless. I fought so much in my lifetime to that point so that I would be stronger, more capable, but in that moment, I knew I was helpless against a burning home. And I was terrified beyond screaming. In panicked silence, I mounted the horse and took off to the east.

This repeated for years. Find some people to huddle down with, something would destroy our home, we’d all take off in different directions for safety. Lather, rinse, repeat. The longer it went on, the more hopeless we felt. Many gave up. Many stopped caring. Many begged “why,” even though we had no way of truly knowing what caused all of this.

Sure, we saw the ships explode, very briefly, before everything went down. Around many fires we would discuss what this meant on the global scale. Nuclear reactors, medical necessities, agriculture… How long could we keep going, when everything we knew before was so tech-heavy?

After a handful of years, I quit trying to make allies. I was tired of seeing them die. I went off on my own to try to live like a hermit. I wanted isolation. I knew I could find it if I went back to one of the destroyed villages in the mountains. I knew I could stay there for a while, since I had learned how to scavenge for food and make minimal supplies last.

What I didn’t know is that I would get too comfortable in my solitude. I didn’t know that when approached by some fool stronger than myself, I would panic. He was bigger than I am, and the look in his eyes was one of true insanity. He rushed at me. All I could do was try to lose him in the woods I spent years casually learning, leaping over fallen trees and ducking under low-hung branches. This man…this man somehow kept up with me. He cornered me at a cliff, one that looked as if it overhung a flooded quarry.

I’m small. I’m perceived to be female. And I was alone with this terrifying man who’s lost his mind. I was not going to risk finding out what he wanted. Maybe to kill and eat me. Maybe worse. I wasn’t going to find out.

So, I flung myself, arms spread like wings, over the edge of the cliff, expecting death.

Instead, I woke up on this ship. I woke up with a few injuries from the chase, severe malnutrition, and a ringing in my ears.

Simon was there, and though we got off to a very rough start, he helped me by explaining the Ark and the Miys. He did have to sedate me a couple times, as violent as I was trying to be. He helped me get settled onto the ship and understand what the Miys were here. Simon was the first human I met here. And while he is, erm, awkward, I will say it was nice to see someone who hadn’t been through what we had.

A few people clapped, sensing that I had wrapped up my story. I snapped back into reality and wondered how long I had monologued, a bit embarrassed. I took another deep breath. Time to truly wrap myself up.

“Thank you for being here and being patient enough to listen to me go on. I hadn’t put much thought into how much I would share, to be honest. We all went through a lot. That’s why we share. Through our experiences, we can feel more comfortable with those around us. Hopefully, sharing my story will help show that I am an entire person, not just someone who tells you where to go and what to do. Again, thank you.” I found my way off the stage area as I tried not to cry. There were reasons I put this off for so long, and my caretaker was about to find out first hand what I am like when I break down. I needed to find him.

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[theteablogger]

Diversity and character death in DAYD

(Or, “DAYD’s diversity iz pastede on yay”.)

This long-as-fuck post has been sitting in my drafts since sometime in 2015. I decided to finish and publish it because an ex-DAYDian suggested that it might still be useful. The initial idea was to examine how Andy's portrayal of various characters’ gender and sexuality had changed over time. Later, I expanded it to look at a number of different “diversity labels” that Andy applied to his characters, and how they related to who lived or died. When counting casualties, I have excluded those who were resurrected after Druim Cett.

On gender and sexuality:

First, here is each instance that I am aware of in which Andy listed his LGBTQIA characters. Unfortunately, I don’t have links for everything: most of the “20 Random Facts” lists are no longer online, I don’t want to link to chats that include DAYDians’ real names, and I only have some of the Tumblr posts in the form of .docs compiled by DAYDians on the Facebook group.

Undated: In “20 Random Facts About Luna Lovegood”, Luna is described as bisexual, but “she never [got] around to acting on it”. (A DAYDian wrote that list with Andy’s approval and with information provided by him. Later, Andy seemingly forgot about that and wrote another one that didn’t mention her sexuality.) In Susan, Colin, and Icarus’s “20 Random Facts”, Andy says that they are also bisexual. Derek’s says that he is gay, and Rowan’s implies that she is only attracted to girls. Stephen and Gwen’s “20 Random Facts” were each written by other DAYDians with Andy’s approval. Stephen’s says that he’s gay, and Gwen’s seems to imply that she dates both boys and girls, but prefers boys. Much later, in a Tumblr list of his LGBTQIA characters, Andy said that Gwen is a lesbian.

Sometime between April 2008 and July 2009: In his FAQ, Andy said, “I have no problem with slash or homosexuality. Rowan Glynnis and Malcolm Braddock both 'stir their cauldrons in their own direction.' IMHO, both Colin and Luna are bisexual.”

July 14, 2009: In the comments to his “Slash Goggles” post, Andy said, “Luna sees herself as pansexual. Gender is entirely irrelevant when she is looking for a partner of any kind, especially as she doesn't see it as a binary construct, or even a continuum, but as a physical detail as irrelevant to personhood as the color of one's hair. Colin honestly died too young to really know...certainly, he was bicurious, and he certainly liked girls, but where his sexuality would have developed can't be known when it never finished developing.” He also said that Colin, Luna, Stephen, Derek, Victoria, Rowan, Dean, and Gertie are the only characters that “fall under some form of ‘queer’” and that it would be “tokenism” to include a trans person in a group the size of Dumbledore’s Army.

July 17, 2010: Andy said that Derek, Dean, Susan, Stephen, Rowan, Vicky, Colin, and Icarus are “not strictly heteronormative”.

May 26, 2011: In the midst of a post about a lot of other things, including the Trail of Tears hike, Andy listed his "LGBTQ-spectrum characters” as follows: “Derek, Stephen, and Dean were gay, Susan, Icarus, and Colin bisexual, Michael and Terry bicurious, and Victoria and Rowan lesbians, and several of the characters have challenged the socially dictated gender roles, like Ricky fighting to keep his daughter as a single father and Susan heading up the farm and fund after Ernie’s death.”

June 5, 2011: In a chat with several DAYDians, Andy said that his LGBTQIA characters were Derek, Stephen, Dean, Icarus, Colin, Susan, Rowan, and Vicky. He further stated that Derek and Dean are gay; Icarus and Susan are bisexual; Colin is bicurious; Rowan is a “baby bull dyke”*; and Victoria could be either a lesbian or bisexual, but we’ll never know for sure because she died in the Battle of Hogwarts. He didn’t state Stephen’s specific orientation in the chat. In the comments to the LJ post in which the chat was shared, Andy acknowledged that he’d previously said that Luna is bisexual. He also mentioned for the first time that Terry is asexual. 

June 15, 2011: In another chat, Andy clarified that Stephen was gay, as was Derek. He also said that Colin was bicurious, but considered himself bisexual.

September 22, 2012: In a Tumblr post listing DAYD characters and their labels, Andy said that Derek, Stephen, and Dean are gay; Malcolm is genderqueer; Terry is homoromantic/asexual; Michael is homoromantic/heterosexual; Colin, Icarus, and Victoria are bisexual; Rowan is a lesbian; and Luna is “pansexually identified”.

Later that month: In response to a Tumblr ask, Andy confirmed that Terry is homoromantic/asexual. In another response around the same time, he listed his LGBTQIA characters as follows: “Dean, Derek, Stephen, Colin, Susan, Icarus, Vicky, and Rowan out, Gwen deeply closeted maybe-lesbian-maybe-bi, Malcolm heterosexual but genderqueer, and Luna panfashionable…she likes to think of herself as pansexual but has never actually gotten the warm tinglies for anything that wasn’t cismale.” Shortly thereafter, he referred to Susan as “openly bi”.

March 5, 2013: Andy repeated that Malcolm is genderqueer/heterosexual and mentioned for the first time that they’d changed their name to Morgan.

January - February 2014: Over the course of several Tumblr asks, Andy repeated two or three times that Michael is homoromantic/heterosexual and Terry is homoromantic/asexual (but they “could be fairly called ‘a queer couple’”). He also referred to Malcolm as genderfluid.

Here’s a breakdown by character.

Colin: Bisexual according to the 2008 - early 2009 FAQ and his “20 Random Facts”, but bicurious in July 2009. Bisexual in May 2011. Bicurious in June 2011. Bicurious, but self-identifying as bisexual, later that month. Bisexual in September 2012. He is also included on the nonspecific July 2009 and July 2010 lists. Colin dies during the Battle of Hogwarts. He is very prominent in DAYD and a number of side stories, and appears as a ghost in A Peccatis.

Dean, Derek, and Stephen: Derek and Stephen are both described as gay in their “20 Random Facts” lists (Dean doesn’t have one). They are not mentioned in the FAQ post. All three are “some form of ‘queer’” in July 2009 and “not strictly heteronormative” in July 2010. Starting in May 2011, they were consistently described as gay whenever Andy was specific about their sexuality. They all die during the Battle of Hogwarts. Derek and Stephen barely appear in DAYD, although they’re both in “Reasons”. Derek also has his own “Rank and File” story and appears in “Boys Will Be”. Stephen briefly shows up in a couple of Mike-and-Terry fics and appears in a flashback at the beginning of A Peccatis. Dean only comes into DAYD for the battle and is not present in any of Andy’s other fic. 

Gertie: First referred to as “some form of ‘queer’” in July 2009 and never mentioned as LGBTQIA before or after that. Her gender identification and sexuality are unspecified. She dies during the Battle of Hogwarts. Gertie doesn’t appear in DAYD at all, but has three whole lines in a side story (”Turning the Tide”). 

Gwen: Dates both boys and girls, but prefers boys, according to her “20 Random Facts”. She is a lesbian, according to an undated Tumblr post. Andy describes her as “deeply closeted maybe-lesbian-maybe-bi” as of September 2012, but her sexuality is not mentioned on his “labels” list that month. She is also absent from the FAQ post and the July 2009, July 2010, May 2011, and June 2011 lists. Gwen dies during the Battle of Hogwarts. She is only mentioned once in DAYD. Her sole significant appearance in any of Andy’s fic is in “Wanted”, which portrays a sexual encounter between her and Jack Sloper. 

Icarus: Bisexual according to his “20 Random Facts”. He is absent from the FAQ post and from the list of “queer” characters in July 2009, but is described as “not strictly heteronormative” in July 2010. Icarus is consistently referred to as bisexual starting in May 2011. He is murdered in Sluagh (before Druim Cett, so he isn’t resurrected). He is only mentioned once in DAYD, but is fairly important in Sluagh and features in a couple of side stories.

Luna: Bisexual in the 2008 - early 2009 FAQ post and her “20 Random Facts”, pansexual in July 2009, “pansexually identified” in September 2012, and “panfashionable” later that month. She is absent from the July 2010 and May 2011 lists of non-heteronormative and/or LGBTQIA characters, and Andy explicitly stated that she never actually feels sexual attraction for anyone other than cisgender men. luna survives DAYD, in which she is very much present, and is out of the country during Sluagh. She also appears in A Peccatis and some side stories.

Malcolm/Morgan: Implied to be gay in the 2008 - early 2009 FAQ post. First mentioned as genderqueer and heterosexual in September 2012 and consistently described as genderqueer (or genderfluid) and heterosexual thereafter. Absent from the July 2009, July 2010, May 2011, and June 2011 lists. Their gender identification is never mentioned in fic; it only appears in three responses to Tumblr asks and an infodump on the Facebook group. Morgan is also one of only two Slytherins to join Dumbledore’s Army: Andy portrayed them as an effeminate stereotype alongside Terrence Runcorn’s hypermasculinity. They live, perhaps only because they become too frightened to remain in the DA following the murder of their housemate. Morgan is barely in DAYD, and their only other appearances are in a snippet with Renny and in a short fic recounting their departure from the DA. 

Michael and Terry: See this post. They both die in the Battle of Hogwarts. They are very prominent in DAYD and Andy’s other fic, and they also appear in a flashback at the beginning of A Peccatis. Andy had planned to write another fic, called Oubliette, in which the two of them would turn out to have been in limbo since the Battle of Hogwarts, and a “voodoo queen” named Mama Nola (yes, really) would offer to resurrect them ~for a price~.

Rowan: Her “20 Random Facts” heavily implies that she is attracted to girls. She’s implied to be a lesbian in the 2008 - early 2009 FAQ post, first specifically called a lesbian in May 2011, and consistently described as such after that. She is also included on the nonspecific July 2009 and July 2010 lists. Rowan dies during the Battle of Hogwarts. She has an important role in DAYD, but is not very prominent in spite of that. Rowan appears in a few side stories and shows up in A Peccatis as a horribly mutilated ghost.

Susan: Bisexual according to her “20 Random Facts”. She is absent from the July 2009 list, but is described as “not strictly heteronormative” in July 2010 and as bisexual in May 2011 and thereafter--except that Andy didn’t mention it in the September 2012 “labels” list. Susan never feels or expresses attraction to anyone but cisgender men in fic: although her “20 Random Facts” does say that she sleeps with women after Ernie dies, that is the only time it’s ever mentioned. Later, Andy did some Supernatural crossover Susan/Ruby fanart that may or may not be considered DAYD canon. Susan survives DAYD and Sluagh and is extremely important throughout the entire trilogy. She also appears in quite a few side stories.

Victoria: “Some form of ‘queer’ in July 2009 and “not strictly heteronormative” in July 2010. She is called a lesbian in May 2011, but described as either a lesbian or bisexual in June 2011, and bisexual in September 2012. She dies during the Battle of Hogwarts. Her only actual appearance in DAYD is when she faints on the Hogwarts Express, and she’s only in one side story and a snippet with Rowan.

The three most prominent LGBTQIA characters not involved with Dumbledore’s Army are Robin (Icarus’s Sluagh-era fuckbuddy, always referred to as gay), Brian (Irish auror who is revealed to be gay during A Peccatis), and Emerson (Malcolm’s partner, always described as genderqueer or genderfluid). Neither Robin nor Emerson appears in Andy’s fic, although Robin is in a very brief snippet written in response to a Tumblr ask. Brian died at Druim Cett, but was apparently resurrected along with everyone else.

As a side note, the “defying gender roles” business mentioned in the May 2011 LJ post is only noteworthy because Andy and all of his DAYDverse stories are so very, very gender essentialist. The examples that he gave are especially amusing to me because they both represent extremely common tropes in romance novels. For years, Harlequin and similar publishing houses have been churning out single dad romances by the dozen because they’re so popular. There are entire publishing lines dedicated to them! Also ubiquitous is the tragic young widow who “defiantly” chooses to run her late husband’s farm and raise their child single-handedly until a big, strapping, manly man (with optional Dark Past) comes along to help her. My own mother has several of those books on her shelf, most of the historical and/or Christian romance subgenres. 

That was as far as I got in 2015. More recently, I looked back at Andy’s LJ post from July 17, 2010, in which he broke down the cast list by which labels fit them: people of color, non-Protestants, people with disabilities, etc. I cross-referenced those lists with casualty lists from DAYD and Sluagh. I have to admit that I haven’t read A Peccatis very closely, so if any of these characters died in that fic, I missed it.

* No, it is not okay for Andy to say things like this. Yes, he still uses this kind of language a lot.

On diversity and death:

Andy’s DA has 78 members, of which 36 are female and 42 are male (although one of the guys later identifies as genderqueer). 12 members of the canonical DA who have already graduated return for the Battle of Hogwarts. 5 of those are female; 7 are male. Of the 90 total DA members, 56 (62%) die in DAYD and Sluagh. 

I’ve already noted that of the 14 LGBTQIA members of Dumbledore’s Army, 11 die. One of the three survivors (Morgan) isn’t in any fic other than DAYD, in which they exist only to make Renny look more manly, and a couple of short side stories. Susan and Luna’s sexuality is informed-only, and Andy waffled about Luna a lot.

Of 15 characters of color--Andy omitted Cho Chang--seven (Stephen, Dean, Tommy, Padma, Parvati, Romilda, and Cho) die in DAYD. Two more of these characters are maimed: Tony Goldstein loses both legs and Li Su (called Su Li in canon) loses her entire body below the waist. They later get married. Emma sustains a traumatic brain injury and her back is severely scarred. Salome is so badly injured that it takes her a year to recover.  

Of the 21 non-Protestant characters on this list, 13 (Stewart, Terry, Michael, Stephen, Leslie, Wayne, Oisin, Tommy, Camellia, Padma, Parvati, Romilda, and Icarus) die and two more (Tony and Li again) are severely maimed. Salome is injured as mentioned above. Neville is scarred to the point that he develops severe, chronic back problems as a result.

Of eight characters who are themselves immigrants to the UK, or are first-generation children of immigrants, five (Ritchie, Stephen, Tommy, Padma, and Parvati) die. Li and Salome survive with severe injuries, as described above. Fritz Bagman (an OC) survives, but loses both hands.

Of four characters born with physical disabilities, two (Jack and Ernie) die. Emma is injured and scarred as previously mentioned.

Every single one of the six characters that Andy says had psychological conditions prior to DAYD (Anna, Terry, Gwen, Gertie, Jack, and Perseus) dies during the Battle of Hogwarts.

Andy also lists ten characters who are extremely rich or poor in his fic, and five of those (Ernie, Michael, Katie, Orla, and Hal) die. He indicates that six characters have criminal pasts, and two of them (Rose and Icarus) die in Sluagh. Of five characters who have substance abuse problems in DAYDverse, only one (Terry) dies. 

Finally, Andy names all of the characters who are “their own definition of feminist”, i.e., every female character in Andy’s version of Dumbledore’s Army except Anna, but apparently none of the women from the canonical DA who’d already graduated, and no men at all. Again, Andy’s DA has 36 female members (of 78 total). 23 of them (too many to list) die in the Battle of Hogwarts and two more (Rose and Rachel) at Druim Cett. Another female member of Andy’s DA (Laura) dies four years after the Battle of Hogwarts from injuries sustained therein. In addition, five of the 12 original DA members who return to Hogwarts for the battle are female, and three of them (Katie, Alicia, and Cho) die. 

The only student deaths in DAYD that also occur in canon are Colin Creevey’s and Fred Weasley’s. (Lavender Brown dies in part two of the film version of DH, but the book is unclear as to whether she survives being mauled by Fenrir Greyback.) Rowling does indicate that besides Fred, Colin, Tonks, and Lupin, the death toll on the side fighting against Voldemort is about fifty; however, none of the others is named. It is very unlikely that all or even most of the remaining dead are students. There were the Order of the Phoenix, staff members, Hogsmeade villagers, Aurors, house elves, centaurs, and others fighting at Hogwarts as well. Oh, and the only students below year seven who were actually present were Colin and Ginny. It was entirely Andy’s choice to have fifty-plus Hogwarts students, many as young as 14, die between the Battle of Hogwarts and Druim Cett. It was also his choice to kill them in a variety of horrible, disgusting, often degrading ways, all described in graphic detail.  The text on this promotional image may as well end with, “...but they probably die horrifically.” 

Most of these characters’ backgrounds are entirely of Andy’s own making, as well. Other than a handful of POC characters and one who Rowling specifically said was Jewish (Tony), the Harry Potter series is pretty terrible with regard to representation. On the surface, that seems to make Andy look pretty good. It’s important to note, though, that most of the above information about these characters is not actually included in DAYD, Sluagh, A Peccatis, or even Andy’s side stories. It mostly came up after the fact on Andy’s LJ or tumblr, in chat, in Q&As, or in “20 Random Facts” lists about the characters. Later, one of his readers might use that information in a fic of their own. When a mention of someone’s ethnicity, etc. does show up in the main trilogy, it is often presented in a problematic way, with stereotyping and fetishization of people from “exotic” races or cultures. The Patil twins are the most obvious examples of this, but someone also recently pointed out to me that the DA members constantly refer to Romilda using an ethnic slur. So while Andy’s fanfiction does have greater representation across the board than Rowling’s novels do, he handles it very poorly and it’s obvious that much of it is an afterthought. Given that he was building a cult around his fanfiction, I believe his motives were most likely to widen the DAYDverse’s demographic appeal and to get people as emotionally invested in the characters and the ‘verse as possible--and ultimately in him, because he literally called himself God in the fandom.

TL;DR: I don’t think Andy deserves much credit for “great representation” when a) it was actually hugely problematic, and b) he killed or severely injured most of his diverse cast in such gratuitously terrible ways that large chunks of both DAYD and Sluagh can only be described as torture porn.

A few other items of note:

Others have written about how despite his alleged commitment to diversity, Andy’s art and writing make it abundantly clear that everyone in his version of the DA is gorgeous and athletic. The only DA member who gains weight (Icarus) does so after the events of DAYD and as a deliberate choice for armchair-psychology reasons. Only the villains are unattractive. 

Andy does casually kill off a lot of characters off-screen or with a quick one-line reference, despite criticizing Rowling for doing exactly that.

I learned from this post by ladyloveandjustice that one of the characters that Andy killed off-screen was based on a real child who had a terminal illness, wrote to JKR, and died before receiving a reply. JKR gave her a cameo in one of the novels as a tribute, and Andy added her name to a list of “the fallen” without a second thought. (Ladyloveandjustice’s sporking of all of DAYD is worth a read, actually. Or just see the wrap-up post, which nicely summarizes some of the major issues with DAYD.)

[dannymdip]

02 - Act 2 (draft)

Act 2:

It is March 1, 2000. Ryan is called into an office. Duke and Edward are both there. They tell Ryan that he’s doing really great in the program and that he’s earned a visit from his parents. They will come to the facility and talk with him there for a couple hours. Then they’ll take him out to a restaurant in Castle Rock, the nearest town. The meeting will be supervised by both of them, and Edward will come along and supervise the outing. Edward is given carte blanche to use whatever means necessary in the case of an attempted escape. The visit will be March 4, this coming Saturday.

Ken and Liz are driving down the dirt road leading to Eshelman. They’re talking about how they’re excited but nervous. They remark on the unsettling seclusion of the compound, but they talk about how Ryan seems to be doing really well here.

Ryan sits in the office; next to him is Edward, who says, “Don’t fuck this up.” In comes Ken and Liz, lead by Duke. Duke explains that he understands how excited they are but there is a no touching policy for safety—it probably wouldn’t be a problem in this case, but the policy has to be universal. Ryan’s parents tell him how happy they are to see him. They ask how he’s doing, basically what you’d expect. Ryan, of course, tells them he’s doing great, the program is great, he gets to do all sorts of things and he’s making the best friends he’s ever had. He introduces them to Edward, who tells them how much Ryan has improved since coming. Duke tells them that if Ryan keeps it up, they’ll be able to send him care packages soon. It’s all very jubilant and celebratory.

They’re in Ryan’s parents’ car. Ken asks him where he wants to go. Ryan, sitting on the left, says, “Can we get McDonalds?” Suddenly, Edward’s eyes go wide. He looks back at Ryan, but instead sees a 10-year-old Liam, saying something indistinct. He looks forward to see Liam’s father, enraged. Back at Liam, he’s saying over and over, “Can we get McDonalds? Can we get McDonalds? Can we get McDonalds?” Liam’s father turns all the way around and yells at Liam, “Shut the fuck up, Liam, you little piece of shit!” Liam’s mom yells, “Honey!” He begins to turn, when everything goes dark and blurry. Edward strains to focus to see Liam’s father, head against the steering wheel, pouring blood. He looks at Liam, who says, “…Dad?” Edward yells, “Liam cover your eyes!” Liam puts his hands over his eyes. Edward kicks his door open and runs around to the other side. He opens the door and helps Liam out of the car with his hands still covering his eyes. He hugs Liam tight and says, “It’s okay, Liam. It’s gonna be okay. It’s gonna be okay.” Edward blinks and is back in Ryan’s parents’ car. Ken says, “What do you think, Edward? McDonalds or Wendy’s.” “Oh, um. McDonalds, I guess.”

They’re all finishing their burgers. Ryan is looking around. The exit sign catches his eye. He watches as people leave the restaurant, each with a ‘ding!’ He looks at Edward, who has finished his food and is sucking noisily on a soda, looking the other way, out the window. Ryan’s eyes dart nervously back and forth from the exit to Edward. The bell dings in his head over and over; the sign starts to change into different messages, ‘ESCAPE’, ‘RUN’, ‘HES NOT LOOKING’, ‘YOU CAN MAKE IT’, ‘NOW’. He blurts out, “I’m ready to go back now.” Edward turns around and looks surprised, then smiles.

That night, Edward volunteers for Head Night Owl duty. He begins the usual routine of sitting by the riflemen, filling out paperwork. He has coffee and Cheetos. He sighs; he looks nervous. “Corner count,” he says to the riflemen. They nod, disinterested, and continue chatting. Edward enters the corner room, bringing his Cheetos with him. Liam is the only one currently on corner time. He’s lying on a mattress on the floor, but his eyes are open and sad. Edward whispers, “Liam.” He looks up, confused, “What’s wrong, what’d I do?” “Nothing, don’t worry.” Edward sits on the mattress next to Liam, who sits up. They both eat Cheetos while they talk:

Edward: “I was thinking about the crash today.” Liam: “Hm.” E: “I like it here, but I’m always worried. You know, I lost my parents, then your folks took me in. I lost them, then mom took us in. She kicked me out. Now Lou is like a father figure for me; every day I worry something’s gonna happen to him.” L: “Lou’s a dick.” Edward laughs. E: “Yeah, but my dad was kind of a dick, too. I don’t think I’ll ever feel secure until there’s no one left above me. If I’m at the very top, I can’t lose anyone I look up to.” L: “You sound like a megalomaniac.” E: “Maybe.” Liam takes a beat, then smiles. L: “Well, you’re always the top as far as I’m concerned.”

Liam puts his hand on Edward’s crotch. “Cardinal Rules, Liam. I don’t want that guilt on my mind.” Edward pauses and says, “Well. I want it, but I just can’t. I gotta get back to my post, babe.” Edward kisses Liam and gets up. Liam says, “Love you.” Edward says, “Love you too.”

Now a similar Ryan montage as before, but with more conviction. More privileges, higher ranks. He’s now a Coordinator, doing headcounts and recording clothes. He’s now a Night Owl, drinking coffee and eating Cheetos all night while counting heads in the boys’ dorm upstairs. He sees down the stairs that Edward was not lying about the riflemen. He’s getting Bottom Bunk Privs, Exercise Privs, Writing Privs, Facial Hair Privs, Jewelry Privs, Long Sleeve Privs, Couch Privs, Music Privs. He’s now a Shingle Expeditor, in the X’s—the highest division, acting as security. He’s formally introduced to KRYSTAL ROGERS. She’s the staff member in charge of the X’s. She’s young, late 20’s, she’s cute and charismatic. He takes a shine to her. He’s now a Senior Shingle Expeditor, now a Coordinator of the X’s. He’s now dressed fashionably with a shitty beard; he listens to a Walkman while he lifts weights twice a week. he has good bedding from home and gets care packages with treats. During his free time, he shoots the breeze with Duke, Krystal. He has now achieved the highest rank, Senior Coordinator of the X’s. There was only one other SCX—Edward. Unlike most of his promotions, Lou is present for this one. So, in the room is Duke, Lou, and Krystal. Lou tells Ryan that this is the fastest any student has ever completed the program. His growth has been outstanding, he’s one of the best students they’ve ever had at Eshelman. As Lou says this, Edward passes by the door. Edward lingers after passing it to listen to Lou. Hearing this, his face turns to one of bitterness and jealousy.

It is now May 30, 2000—one week after the release of the Marshal Mathers LP. Lou stands in front of the room and yells, “HOUSE IN THE DINING ROOM!” Everyone files in. Lou begins a speech: “It has come to our attention that some of you have been talking about a hack musician by the name of Marshal Mathers, or ‘Eminem’. Mathers is not to be spoken of in this house anymore—Ever. He sets a horrible example for you all, and he goes against everything Eshelman stands for. He had a terrible upbringing; he glorifies the breaking of all three of our cardinal rules: drugs, violence, and sex. He has lyrics like: ‘I take seven kids from Columbine, stand ’em all in line/Add an AK-47, a revolver, a nine/A MAC-11 and it oughta solve the problem of mine/And that’s a whole school of bullies shot up all at one time’. Columbine is not a joke. It’s not to be laughed at or heralded. Maybe if Mathers had been a student here, he would be a good person now, like Bruce Fletcher. But instead, Marshall Mathers will be dead within the next three years; mark my words.” At the mention of Bruce Fletcher, Ryan’s eyes go wide and his jaw drops. He approaches Lou after the speech, “Hey Lou, what was that you said about Bruce Fletcher?” Lou says, “Oh, Bruce was a student here at Eshelman back in the 80s.” “That’s so cool; that’s like all I listen to on my Walkman. Did he graduate?” “Absolutely.” Ryan thinks for a second, “Do you think I could write to him?” Lou smiles, “I don’t see why not. Ask Krystal about him, they were students here at the same time.”

Ryan is talking with Krystal in the staff office, “So you knew Bruce Fletcher?” Krystal says, “Sure, I knew him. I looooove his music. He was great; a lot like you.” Ryan grins, “Do you think you could call him and ask if I could write to him?” Krystal says, “For you? Of course.” She picks up the phone and dials. It rings, then a voice answers, “Hello?” “Hey Bruce, it’s Krystal. I have a student here at Eshelman who’s a huge fan, I’m gonna put him on, okay?”

We now get a series of short letters back and forth between Ryan and Bruce. At first it’s introductions, then talking about Eshelman, then really being buddies and Bruce telling him once he graduates, they can jam together, he’ll give Ryan one of his guitars, etc.

It is now June 12. Once again Ryan is called into the room with all the staff and Edward. Lou tells him that he thinks Ryan’s ready to do a home visit. He makes it clear that they must plan this out in painstaking detail and stick to the itinerary 100%. Edward, naturally, will be coming along to monitor.

We see the whole itinerary. It’s specific to the half-hour He is to get to Chicago on Friday evening and leave Sunday morning. When he arrives on Friday, there will be a small party with his family. The next day, at 5:00PM it says “Dinner at [somewhere fancy]”.

Friday afternoon, Ryan’s parents’ car pulls into their driveway. Ryan steps out of the car; it’s the first time he’s been here since being thrown into a van. He looks around with almost no recognition. He walks into his house and to his room, still looking like he’s never seen any of it before, sometimes picking things up and considering them. The doorbell rings.

In the evening, Ryan’s family sits around the living room, talking. It’s Ken and Liz, his grandparents on both sides, and an aunt, SOPHIE. Edward isn’t paying any attention to the conversation. He looks to the kitchen and notices Ryan’s parents behind the little bar. Ken is about to pour a glass of wine, but Liz stops him and grabs the bottle, saying, “We can’t drink at all in front of Ryan, we have to set a good example.” Ken says, “Good call.” Edward blinks and the scene of Liz grabbing the bottle from Ken turns into a scene of Edward’s mom, Sydney Dersch, grabbing a bottle of whiskey from his dad Roger. “You’ve had more than enough, Roger.” “I’ll say when I’ve had enough!” “Please, give me the bottle. You get so mean when you’re drunk.” Edward’s dad yanks the bottle to the side, unintentionally hitting his wife in the head with it—hard. She falls and hits her head again on an end table. Roger’s jaw drops and the bottle slips out of his hand. The whiskey begins soaking into the carpet along with the blood. We now see that Edward had been watching this whole thing play out from the couch. He has a safety blanket. Roger looks at Edward with tears in his eyes. He walks into another room and walks back with a revolver in his hand. He comes up to Edward. “Eddy, listen, I’m going to do something you’re not going to understand for a long time. If I don’t do this, I’ll have to go to a very, very bad place—a place where I don’t think I could make it. So I need you to close your eyes now and cover them up with your hands.” Edward does it. “That’s good, buddy, that’s good. Now stay like this no matter what. In a little bit, some nice people will come visit and they’ll tell you when you can look, but right now I need you to stay like this, okay?” Edward nods. Roger says, “Okay.” He walks over to where his wife is and picks up the phone. He dials 911. We see Edward peeking a little bit. We are now viewing the scene from Edward’s perspective—just little bits between the cracks of his fingers. Roger says, “Hello yes. I need you to come to 644 Madison Road as soon as you can, and please, take good care of my kid.” Roger drops the phone, puts the gun barrel in his mouth, and pulls the trigger. Edward takes his hands down and approaches the bodies. He sits down cross legged and puts his safety blanket onto his mom (Not covering her head; just like a normal blanket). He picks up the phone, which is saying “Hello? Hello? Sir?” Edward says, “Hello.” “Hey there, what’s your name?” “Eddy.” “What’s going on, Eddy, is everything okay?” “No, I don’t think so. My dad spilled on the carpet but I’m gonna, I think, have to clean it up ‘cause I think they’re, I think, both dead.” Edward blinks again and it’s back to the present, the exact moment from before, no time has passed. He watches Liz put away the bottle and Ken put back the wine glass.

The afternoon of the next day, Ryan’s parents are gonna take the kids out for dinner. After driving a while, they pull into an apartment complex. Ryan asks where they are. His parents tell him that they have a surprise for him; they’re not going to [fancy restaurant]. Ryan looks nervously at Edward. His parents lead them to one of the apartments. His mom says, “Why don’t you knock, Ryan?” Ryan knocks. The door opens to reveal it is the apartment of Bruce Fletcher. “You must be Ryan.”

They’re all sitting at a dinner table while Bruce brings out plates. Ryan asks Edward, “Hey, do you think this is okay for us to be doing?” Edward says, “I think it’s fucking awesome.” Ryan looks relieved.

They’re all eating, having nice conversation. Bruce is asking about Eshelman stuff—is Duke still there? How’s Lou doing? Where are you in the hierarchy? Ryan is asking about his music career. Ryan says, “You know, a lot of the time I would skip school or stay out late to go to your concerts. It’s like I was meant to go to Eshelman and you helped me find my way there.”

After dinner, Bruce is showing Ryan all of his guitars and stuff. He asks if Ryan wants to jam and they play a few things together, Ryan on guitar and Bruce on drums. Bruce improvises some lyrics; Edward taps his foot to the beat. “You got some talent, kid. You know, sometimes at Eshelman they would let me play guitar—for special occasions and such. You should see if you can do that.” Bruce gives Ryan a signed pick that he used at some big show. Ryan is elated.

The next morning, they begin the drive back to Eshelman. Ryan plays guitar in the car and comments on how good the pick feels. He tells his parents to play certain CDs and sings along. He can’t wait to get back and ask Lou about being allowed to play. We haven’t yet seen Ryan get anywhere close to this level of excitement, optimism, general happiness. Edward smiles.

When they get to Eshelman and Ryan and Edward are in the office, Ryan asks Lou about playing his guitar. Lou says he’ll think about it, but probably. Ryan goes to bed with a smile on his face.

The next morning, Ryan’s eating breakfast on the couch when he hears a call from Duke, “RYAN! COME KNOCK!” He looks confused, but he walks to the door and does the knocking ritual. When he enters, the dealing crew asks if he knows why he’s there. He says he doesn’t. They tell him that Edward brought it to their attention that he deviated from the itinerary. Ryan’s expression changes to one of hurt and anger. He swallows and straightens his face. The dealing crew tells him he’s being shot down. They give him a harsh Verbal Reprimand and send him to the staff office. In the office, Lou is sitting looking disgusted with Ryan. Duke looks pissed off and Krystal looks the other way. Lou says, “You are not to communicate with Bruce Fletcher ever again. We’re confiscating the guitar pick he gave you as well as all written correspondence with him, past, present, or future. Your L.E. is corner time. One hour. Get the fuck out of my sight.” Krystal walks him over to the corner. When he sits down, she puts a hand on his shoulder and says, “Don’t worry, Ryan. You’re the best student we’ve ever had. You work extra hard, you’ll be back to SCX in like a week, easy.” Ryan looks comforted. He looks over to see Liam still in the corner. Liam looks gaunt and tired, like he hasn’t been eating or sleeping enough. Liam stares intensely at the corner—which we see is just blank wood—muttering quickly, “Shut the fuck up, Liam, you little piece of shit.” He’s rocking in his chair. We look back to see that, from Liam’s perspective, the corner is covered in dozens if not hundreds of ants.

END of Act 2

[global-news-station]

HANOI: North Korean leader Kim Jong Un and US President Donald Trump met in Vietnam on Wednesday for a second summit that the United States hopes will persuade North Korea to give up its nuclear weapons in exchange for promises of peace and development.

Kim and Trump shook hands and smiled briefly in front of a row of their national flags at the Metropole hotel in the Vietnamese capital, Hanoi, before heading to dinner together.

Trump told reporters he thought the talks would be very successful, and asked if he was “walking back” on denuclearization, said “no”.

At their historic first summit in Singapore last June, Trump and Kim pledged to work toward denuclearization and permanent peace on the Korean peninsula but little progress has been made.

Kim said they had overcome obstacles to hold their second summit and praised Trump for his “courageous decision” to begin a dialogue.

“Now that we’re meeting here again like this, I’m confident that there will be an excellent outcome that everyone welcomes, and I’ll do my best to make it happen,” Kim said.

Trump and Kim held a 20-minute, one-on-one chat before sitting down to dinner with U.S. Secretary of State Mike Pompeo Trump’s acting Chief of Staff Mick Mulvaney, Kim’s top envoy, Kim Yong Chol, and North Korean Foreign Minister Ri Yong Ho.

On Thursday, the two leaders will hold a series of meetings, the White House said. The venue has not been announced.

“We’re going to have a very busy day tomorrow … Probably a very quick dinner,” said a smiling, relaxed looking Trump, seated beside Kim at a round table with the other four officials and two interpreters.

“Our relationship is a very special relationship.”

Kim also appeared at ease. “We’ll have a very interesting dialogue,” he told Trump.

GOOD RELATIONS

Trump said late last year he and Kim “fell in love” but whether the bonhomie can move them beyond summit pageantry to substantive progress on eliminating Pyongyang’s nuclear arsenal that threatens the United States is the question that will dominate the talks.

Trump and Kim’s Singapore summit, the first meeting between a sitting U.S. president and a North Korean leader, ended with great fanfare but little substance over how to dismantle North Korea’s nuclear weapons and ballistic missiles.

In the run-up to this summit, Trump has indicated a more flexible stance, saying he was in no rush to secure North Korea’s denuclearization. He repeated that on Wednesday, saying while some people believed the talks should be moving more quickly, he was satisfied.

Trump has held out the prospect of easing sanctions if North Korea does something “meaningful”.

Some critics have said Trump appeared to be wavering on a long-standing U.S. demand for complete and irreversible denuclearization by North Korea, and risked squandering leverage if he gave away too much, too quickly.

Asked if he would declare a formal end to the Korean War, which North Korea has long called for, Trump said: “We’ll see.”

North and South Korea have been technically at war since their 1950-53 conflict, with the Americans backing the South, ended in a truce, not a treaty.

‘AWESOME’ POTENTIAL

U.S. intelligence officials have said there is no sign North Korea will ever give up its entire arsenal of nuclear weapons, which it sees as its guarantee of national security. Analysts say it won’t commit to significant disarmament unless punishing U.S.-led economic sanctions are eased.

The two sides have discussed specific and verifiable denuclearization measures, such as allowing inspectors to observe the dismantlement of North Korea’s Yongbyon nuclear reactor, U.S. and South Korean officials say.

U.S. concessions could include opening liaison offices or clearing the way for inter-Korean projects.

Despite little progress on his goal of ridding North Korea of its weapons programs, Trump appeared to be betting on his personal relationship with North Korea’s young leader, and the economic incentive after 70 years of hostility between their countries.

“Vietnam is thriving like few places on earth. North Korea would be the same, and very quickly, if it would denuclearize,” Trump said on Twitter ahead of the meeting.

“The potential is AWESOME, a great opportunity, like almost none other in history, for my friend Kim Jong Un. We will know fairly soon – Very Interesting!”

Any deal will face scrutiny from American lawmakers and other skeptics who doubt North Korea is willing to give up the weapons.

For Trump, a deal that eases the North Korean threat could hand him a big foreign-policy achievement in the midst of domestic troubles.

While he is in Hanoi, his former personal lawyer Michael Cohen is testifying before U.S. congressional committees, with the president’s business practices the main focus.

Cohen, in wide-ranging testimony he is due to deliver on Wednesday, refers to a comment Trump made to him about avoiding the U.S. military draft for the Vietnam War on medical grounds: “‘You think I’m stupid, I wasn’t going to Vietnam’,” Cohen cited Trump as saying.

“I find it ironic, President Trump, that you are in Vietnam right now,” Cohen said in a draft statement seen by Reuters.

Trump, responding to the statement on Twitter, said Cohen was lying to reduce his prison time. He declined to respond when a reporter asked him about Cohen later.

The post Trump and Kim predict success in high-stakes nuclear summit appeared first on ARYNEWS.

https://ift.tt/2Nvhh2w

[wolfstargames]

The Basic Rundown

There will be three teams based upon the fest theme. Participants will be given the chance to request a team upon sign up, but we make no guarantees that you will receive the team you requested, as teams need to be at least relatively even for voting purposes. This is, in fact, a competition, but only in the spirit of pushing each other further to create better works for this ship we all love so much.

Each participant will create a work, fic or art, based upon not only the theme but a prompt. Details on the prompts as well as how to claim them will be revealed after the teams are solidified. Then, those works will be revealed and voted upon in a blind vote to determine how each team did.

During the creation time there will be both team and inter-team activities. These will all be low key and completely optional. They’re just a way to spend some time with your team/fest participants and have a little fun to keep tensions low and promote a friendly sort of competition.

Once posting begins there will be a poll attached to each work, which will be posted anonymously, for readers/viewers to vote on how well the piece fit the theme of the fest as well as how well it fit the prompt. Those votes will be averaged for a total team score at the end of posting. Please keep in mind that these works are not in direct competition with each other. The voting is not meant to compare works. There will simply be a representative work from each team. Please be aware that team participants and mods will not be allowed to vote, for fairness purposes!

As this is a scored fest please keep in mind that all works are to be anonymous. We understand that this is slightly difficult for artists as style may be recognizable, but please do your best. This means that you may not share any snippets, anything more than very vague ideas, or any pieces or bits of your creations until after the reveals when the work is wholly yours to do with as you wish. We do understand the concern about posting unsigned art, so we will be providing a Wolfstar Games watermark for any artist that wishes to use it. And if you have any concerns about this please contact a mod and we will see what we can do for you.

Just remember, Wolfstar Games is about having fun and creating more content for our favorite boys, not about winning or losing. And most importantly, it’s about having fun!

Theme: COMMUNICATION

This means any form of communication. Anything from a story about miscommunication, to a comic about receiving a bunch of letters, to the art of telling someone they are loved through touch. Reading a book in braille, learning sign language for a loved one, telling a story through a collection of tattoos. There are so many options.

Time Line:

Sign-ups begin on Wednesday, June 10th and last through Sunday, June 21st, ending at 11:59pm Eastern time (GMT-5). Sign-ups will happen via google form, so please watch this space for that to go live.

Teams will be announced on Wednesday, June 24th, so please watch this space for more info.

Prompts will be available for viewing only on Wednesday, June 24th.

Prompts will be available for claiming on Monday, June 29th and will close at 11:59PM EST (GMT-5) on Friday, July 3rd. Prompts will fall into three categories: Word based, Image based, and Audio based. Each prompt will be available only one time per team, so the sooner you make your selections the more likely you are to get the prompt you want. If, for any reason, you are not available during any of the claiming period please contact a mod and we will make accommodations for you.

Works are due by 11:59 PM on Sunday, October 18th EST (GMT-5). As always we want this to be fun and low stress, so if there are any problems with finishing please just contact a mod and we will work with you to see what we can do. As this is a team competition there may be a small points penalty incurred for late works, however, so please contact a mod as soon as you can if there are any difficulties. There will be check ins along the way to see how everyone is doing and make sure there are no issues, but if something arises please don’t feel the need to wait for a check in to talk with a mod. That’s what we’re here for.

Posting begins Monday, October 26th and runs until we run out of works.

The winning team will be revealed once posting is complete and the mods have had a chance to tally the votes. Keep watch on this space for more information on that further into the fest.

Rule & FAQ

What sort of content am I committing to if I sign up?

For fic, the minimum word count will be 1000 words. There is no maximum, however, please keep in mind that ease of reading, which unfortunately sometimes includes length, will have an impact on how the voting goes. We would never dare to stifle anyone’s muse, so please write as the whim takes you, just keep that in mind when you’re creating.

There is no minimum size for art, but we would request that the maximum size be something that is easily viewable on a single screen. Again, we don’t want to cramp anyone’s creativity, but for voting purposes it’s helpful to be able to see the entire work at one time.

What sort of artwork is acceptable?

All art must be visual, original art. By original art, we mean that the final product must be an original product of the artist. Using photos for reference is fine, and you can use whatever traditional or digital medium you require, so long as the art starts and finishes as your own product. Photo manips are not allowed. Hit up the mods if you need clarity on an idea.

Can I use a work that I’ve published previously, or that’s been sitting in my drafts?

For this fest, we need all original content, none of which has been published previously. Since this is a theme and prompt-based fest, all creators should plan on starting new projects so they can be fully inspired by their chosen prompt.

Is there an age requirement to participate?

All ages are welcome! However, if you are under 18, your creation must be rated G or T on AO3.

Are there any other restrictions on creations?

This is a Wolfstar-centric fest, so we do ask that your creation focuses on Remus and Sirius’ relationship, though other pairings are welcome. All fics must be properly tagged with the appropriate content and trigger warnings on AO3. All fics must be edited, beta read, and legible.

Will I need to be signed up for any specific platforms to participate?

You will need an AO3 account for posting purposes. All fest info will be shared on Dreamwidth, Tumblr, and Twitter. A Discord chat system will be set up as well. All of these platforms, other than AO3, are optional.

Can I share snippets of my work on my social media?

Since this is an anonymous fest, we ask that absolutely no snippets or hints be shared during the run of the fest. Once the fest has concluded, you may post whatever you like to social media.

I can’t sign up, but I still want to participate, what can I do?

No worries, there are lots of ways for you to help support WSG! Follow us on Dreamwidth, Tumblr, and Twitter; reblog, comment, and share our posts to spread the word. We’ll also be asking for help with beta reading, pinch hitting, and other cool ways for you to get involved!

I’ve got more questions, help!

No problem, we’re happy to hear from you! Ping us on one of the social media sites above, or email wolfstargamesmods at gmail dot com.

[comicteaparty]

June 8th-June 14th, 2019 Creator Babble Archive

The archive for the Creator Babble chat that occurred from June 8th, 2019 to June 14th, 2019.  The chat focused on the following question:

What was the original incarnation of your current comic?  What has changed over the lifespan of the idea, and what has remained the same?

Nutty (Court of Roses)

My comic, Court of Roses http://courtofroses.thecomicseries.com/, was originally built around my first D&D character, a half-elf bard named Merlow the Rose. The comic was going to be strictly based on D&D, but as I started going gung-ho on the worldbuilding I started deviating away, making my own variations on races, making my own pantheon, and even formulating different magic rules and creatures. It's still largely inspired by D&D, and other fantasy works like Lord of the Rings, Elder Scrolls, etc., but I'm also trying to make the world my own, too!

Pencilz

My comic the Caraway Crew https://tapas.io/series/The-Caraway-Crew was originally based on my childhood friend group. Actually the very first incarnation I had with the Caraways was where we were all self-inserted into some large crossover fanfiction... it was pretty bad aha.(edited)

I just realized I said that twice oops

Draco Plato

The first incarnation of my comic....world was a Sailor Moon parody I believe. There was a boarding school and magical boys and girls that fought aliens or something. Firosofi was the "priest" of water and Affinity was the "priestess" of light (ironically her character hasn't seen the light of day in years). Apus was still around in that incarnation since Firosofi and Affinity were affiliated with it there too I think The initial premise still makes up the core of the Apus ideology I think; people fight in pairs against forces that threaten Earth. The focus since shifted to be much more character focused and on characters who were made much later (Damon and Lyall primarily). http://khyatix.com/

ErinPtah (Leif & Thorn | BICP)

But I'm A Cat Person http://bicatperson.com/ basically sprang into being (heh) fully-formed, but I pulled a bunch of the characters from earlier fanfiction incarnations. Jany and Kara Lynn got started in a Neopets RPG; Timothy was created as an OC member of Section XIII in Hellsing; Reseda and Cybele were from the same Sailor Moon exoplanetary team.(edited)

Leif & Thorn http://leifandthorn.com/ started as Colbert Report fanfiction XD It was so far removed from the source material that I spent years thinking "I should file off the serial numbers and try to publish this as an original work"...but it didn't click until I got away from the idea of doing a 1:1 adaptation of the fic's plot, and just used it as the foundation of a world where I could set all kinds of other stories.

AntiBunny

My comic AntiBunny http://antibunny.net/ started out as an all pencil sketchy comic about depression. It experimented a lot early on artistically as I tried to tear down my old style and build a new one. As it's changed over the years I've built up a new art style, and as I've changed as a person I'd say it's become its own story driven by the characters. The protagonist's depression and anxiety is still important, but I think the significant thing is that I'm seeing depression from the outside rather than the inside, and my writing has changed a lot as a result.

mathtans

Interesting topic. I might be unique in that my math comic started as a web serial (though I didn't know that's what it was at the time). Meaning text, but supplemented with drawings, because the point was that the graphs were character hairstyles: https://sites.google.com/site/taylorspolynomials/series/openbar

I gave it up after several years due to lack of interest, then brought it back as a web comic with many of the characters redesigned (parabola having twintails instead of bunny ears, for instance). http://mathtans.ca/ It then crossed over with the serial, meaning both sets of characters are canon and take place in the same universe. https://mathtans.blogspot.com/2017/04/math-character-bible.html

So the more it changes, the more it stayed the same? (As to plot, that tended to be whatever math concept I thought would be interesting, from archaic trig functions to fractals... I never knew where that'd be going.)

kayotics

The original incarnation of Ingress Adventuring Company https://ingress-comic.com/ was, like many other fantasy comics, derived from a D&D campaign I played in. I really loved the character I played (Toivo), and the campaign had finished, so I decided to keep using him in more stories. While the basic idea of the character is the same, I completely removed him from the campaign that he was in so I wouldn't have any issues with having to ask my friends to use their characters. Toivo has essentially remained the same, but large parts of his backstory and the entire setting has been changed from the original game I played him in. And, since I'm no longer tied to D&D with a comic, the rules of magic are a lot more vague. Similar to what Nutty said above, my comic is still largely inspired by D&D and other fantasy staples, but at least I can deviate from them as I continue to make my comic.

MJ Massey

Black Ball http://welcometoblackball.com/ is a much more recent idea of mine and hasn't really changed too much in terms of the overarching story, though minor things have shifted such as Maude becoming more of a main character, giving her a brother who is also getting more involved in the plot, and changing the role of a future character. But it's always been Emily and Chester solving a murder mystery.

MJ Massey

The shifts have been so minor and over time that it's hard to find where the "first draft" ends and the "next version" begins. But I've been mentally shifting things as I go along and see that certain aspects of the story need more attention for the ending to pay off or for the character to get well developed

Who the murderer is has stayed the same and how it happens and why. Just the circumstances around it have been smudged and fixed

Tuyetnhi

The OG plans I had for https://oiydcomic.com/ occurred after I was fiddling with twine to make a one shot short story, and an illustration series/zine project after having an intense dream. At first, I initially wanted to create it into an ero-romance comic about a woman having a one night stand with her dream lover, eventually living together after seeing each other for a few weeks. After thinking about it further (and some beta readers later lmao), I decided to develop into a romance-focused drama about acceptance and making life more than what is instilled in our dreams. I fleshed out Cara's (main character) modivations, her background in regards on courtship and romance somewhat seen in the asian-american experience (specifically Vietnamese-american rituals; some that retained after viet dispora came to the US in the late 80's - 90's and the effects on their children). Basically, from intense escapism to a general exploration on romance. With some common themes I've liked in 90's shoujo with some criticisms here and there.(edited)

Respheal

Galebound (http://www.galebound.com/) started off as what was going to be a short story. I posted it up on deviantART just for fun, and I was totally pantsing the plot xD I had an idea of a magician who for some reason couldn't ask questions, and the stablehand he kidnapped when he wasn't getting a horse fast enough. The original idea was that Din was on the run from something? And Conan was that hapless stablehand the protags burst in on like "I need a horse!" before escaping $antagonist or chasing someone. Originally Din was supposed to be a good guy, for real, just...more of a trickster to Conan's straight-faced act(edited)

Since its inception, the plot got way deeper and a gazillion times more horrible I think at one point an Obligation wasn't necessary for magic, and probably wasn't even totally compulsory But then the Pascal Incident happened and making the Obligation compulsory suddenly became much more integral to the plot and world. And once that happened, Din's backstory got more fleshed out and his character got darker. I still really wasn't sure what to do with Conan at that point, though. That didn't hit me until like seven years after the original five chapter draft going up on dA, and knowing Conan better changed everything It's fun :'D

snuffysam

Super Galaxy Knights Deluxe R (http://sgkdr.webcomic.ws/) started off as a short film I made for an introductory film class in college (https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=ibRdxNLd3Q4). The film is about a fan of a really bad anime forcing his boyfriend to sit through an episode. The production quality of the film is honestly really bad in retrospect (still got an A though lol). At around the same time as I was making that film, I had just watched... I assume Food Wars, and I was on a real "you could make a battle series out of anything" stint. Like, I would just have a notes document full of ideas like "a shonen series about math olympiads". One idea I really liked was "a shonen series, but it's actually just The Wizard of Oz". After I had finished the short film, I wondered what the actual series that the "anime" took place in would be like, so I decided to build out a comic. I outlined five books, the first being based primarly off the Wizard of Oz. And... the rest is history.

deo101

The first incarnation of millennium (http://millennium.thecomicseries.com/) was pretty much a "chosen one" story where the main character had to go kill an evil space queen and was the only one who could do it. I made about 6 more stories that I later decided I could put together, and the easiest way for me to combine them all was a highschool space story, which I developed for quite a while... Later I changed them all to be adults and started building the current iteration of the story (which has also changed a ton)

Desnik

My WIP comic (which has an ask blog: http://ask-a-warlock.tumblr.com/) started out as a video game idea incorporating Banjo Kazooie collectathon platforming with Ace Attorney trial mechanics....obvs I'm not much of a programmer or 3D modeler, so I went with skills that I actually know how to do: Write and draw(edited)

It had one incarnation where the characters run around all of Europe but it was much too much to develop within 250 pages so I scrapped that and focused on one standalone story, which I'm thumbnailing now and I'm hoping to get into the art stage by the end of the year

and now the page count is about 170 so hopefully that's an easier project to wrangle, when it comes down to it