#this guy is sitting with a straight back
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#I went to a brewery with some friends this evening#And as I was getting ready I found myself suddenly remembering an outing from a wintry college evening many years ago#There was a bar on a quiet street near campus that served beer towers (100oz glass tanks that you could split with a group)#And they’d add orange slices if you ordered Blue Moon‚ which felt very sophisticated to cornedbeefhashtwink and his Hollister flannels#Later that night‚ a woman who had left the bar earlier marched back inside and sidled up to my table clutching a slip of paper#Unbeknownst to me‚ she had been sitting with a young man who had spent the evening shyly watching me sip my Blue Moon#And she had his name and phone number in hand#This was bewildering on several levels#I had never actually seen this guy‚ so I had no idea who was hitting on me#And if I was unprepared to be hit on‚ I was even less prepared to be hit on by proxy#More importantly… I was fully closeted at that point in my life#And a stranger had just materialized out of thin air to make a Gay Announcement#I accepted the paper with a rising sense of flattered panic‚ doing my best to casually play the whole thing off#And then I went straight home and Googled#He was very cute‚ as it turned out#I was in no position to reach out to him (and he was from out of state anyway)‚ but that slip of paper felt like a lifeline#And I’m just feeling very tender thinking about it right now#Almost a decade and a half later#I wonder if he remembers putting his friend up to leaving his number all those years ago whenever he sees an orange slice floating in beer
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Sleepy IwaOi
#iwaoi#oiiwa#my art#haikyuu!!#oikawa tooru#iwaizumi hajime#gosh THSI IS SO ADORBS#the Iwa figurine cant sit properly so i just lean him to Oik PFFT#but if i do force him to sit up straight- he'll still end up leaning to Oikawa the next time i look at them#guys is this a sign#also its been months since i took the photo#n the sketch was in my drafts ALMOST A YEAR ago#and i was only able to finish it NOW. LOL#goshhhh#BUT ARENT THE FIGURINES ADORBSSS??#cant believe i have my own#they're currently lying on their backs beside each other as i type#they r so gay i knew it
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#currently on the worst road trip of my whole entire life! well. i don't want to jinx it lmao but#today i popped TWO TIRES at once in the middle of the Katy Freeway in Houston TX (the widest highway in the US; 26 lanes btw)#managed to make it over to the shoulder without DYING but then had to sit there for like an hour? and panic called a tow truck because duh#I know how to change a tire but I was – again – sitting on the shoulder of the widest freeway on the continent so#anyway I called a tow; a guy showed up. I assumed it was the tow! turned out it was not. but he helped me put on the spare and then was lik#“follow me to my shop I can do the tires for you” and I was like okay! 👍 but then the ACTUAL tow called me and I realized this was#just a random guy (very nice up to that point but then I got scared about following him to a secondary location?) and so I didn't lmao#I just kept driving and didn't follow him but the guy on the phone was then mad at me because I wasn't where I said I would be because#AGAIN – I thought the original guy WAS the tow company that I called? but anyway guy 2 on the phone was like “YOU OWE ME $200!!!!”#and I said for what? also how would I pay you? and he tried to get me to cash app him lmao?? I didn't. I hung up on him#he called me like 6 more times yelling at me until I finally just blocked his number 💀#however NOW at this point I'm driving on one spare tire and one rapidly-flattening second tire and I still have 3 hours left to get where#I was going for the night and to top it all off I'm in the middle of a city I've only been to one time before? so I manage to get to a hote#like a nice-ish one where I'm like “okay if I get stuck here this won't be the end of the world”#because keep in mind today is a national holiday so basically everything is closed!!!! btw!!!!!#but eventually I'm sitting there and it's literally 100F outside and I remember oh right lol I have car insurance which pays for a tow#(a normal one; not a random one I panic-found on google who calls me screaming at me to cash app him $200)#so anyway I call my insurance and the guy on the phone is very nice and is like “it's okay; we'll have someone to you in 45 min”#and I'm like okay. OKAY. 🙌💪 I am a strong independent woman who is figuring this out and no longer on the side of the highway#but instead in a nice calm neighborhood and all I have to do is wait 45 min and everything will be okay#one hour goes by. I call back. get redirected to the tow company that was dispatched. guy says oh! is my guy not there yet?#I say no. he says okay – I'll have him call you. hangs up.#okay. 20 more min go by. guy finally calls me. says “I'm 20-25 min away” at this point I've been waiting about an hour and a half#I say. okay? okay. 30 more minutes go by. I try to call the guy back. straight to voicemail. three more calls. three more no answers.#I call my insurance back. sit on hold for 15 min. eventually get put through to a different person who's like “okay let me check on him”#get put on hold. eventually she comes back and says “okay he says 15 minutes” I've been waiting over 2 hours at this point. I have to PEE#I just... burst into tears. on the phone with this poor random woman from Geico Insurance. I'm bawling my eyes out.#she was trying to get claim info from me but I'm crying so hard she's like “oh baby no. okay. okay. we can get that from you tomorrow.”#when you cry so hard that even the insurance company is like “you know what we're just going to let this one slide”#anyway guy eventually shows up. he's very nice even though I hate him a little for being so late. he drives me to an OPEN TIRE SHOP
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wiress with cats.
#that’s it that’s the post#im kidding i’m going to rant in the tags now#wiress had a cat before her games who was a descendant of the cat her mother had. basically there’s a whole family tree for these cats.#and when her cat dies after she wins the cat already had three kittens.#beetee has beef with these cats. like i’m not kidding. the first time he came over and met them the original one scratched him#and he never got over it#wiress realizes that her cats literally hate him after a while and sits them down (the cats and beetee) for her version of an intervention#on one side are the cats and on the other is a grown man. they are both glaring at each other.#then wiress just leaves them there. like straight up just walks out.#beetee is very skeptical he doesn't think him staring at three cats who are glaring at him is going to solve their rivalry#and wiress is just like trust me on this and honestly beetee is just curious at this point. skeptical but curious.#(it works. beetee never questions wiress’ problem solving techniques again.)#the cats stop scratching him which in itself is a miracle. now it’s only when wiress turns away and they go back to glaring at each other.#idk something abt a guy who’s usually practical having beef with cats is really funny to me#also once they start dating and wiress starts spending the night at beetee’s house i feel the cats are like#“stop stealing mom” “where did mom go” “what did you do to her” and so now the cats hate beetee again.#it’s a vicious cycle#atlas (the first victor from three) also has cats but. he has like twenty. there’s so many cats. beetee is surrounded.#(he’s a dog person. he has never told wiress this. he’s kind of scared to.)#anyway i’m done#i promise i can be normal#sometimes#wiress#wiress thg#the hunger games#thg#district 3#beetee latier#dayne’s wiress thoughts (TM)#dayne’s beetee tag
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teehee i now have a very very wonderful photo
#me leaning and slightly sleeping on the guy i like#🤭🤭#for those who follow my lore closely (so i think only milo) this isn't the cute guy in history whom i have never spoken to#this is the now pretty close friend in my school friendgroup who i had a big crush on for a few months#i became less obsessed with him but that was definitely a good thing i think crushes get unhealthy when they're too strong#and i still think he's cute obviously i mean i liked him for looks alone the first couple weeks#anyway today at this party i was sitting next to him and ended up sleeping next to him three times in succession#i mean kind of sleeping looking back i probably did doze off at points but it was kindaaa fake sleep#first time i edged toward his shoulder but didn't fully have my head resting against it#then i ducked my head up and said i wasn't asleep just resting and we laughed a little#i think he said he wanted to draw on my face avjddhbd#anyway second time my head inched toward his shoulder and was fully on there teehee#then when i ducked my head back up he was like awwe its okay and kinda tucked my head back against his shoulder#i was GEEKING bro 😭😭 i opened my eyes those three times when people questioned my sleepiness bc i could not keep a straight face#i was fighting to contain a grin the whole time#uuughh and he was saying how he didn't want to move and was getting people to pass him things abdjbdhd#he could have kicked me off but he didn't!! that's so cute#i was hoping someone would get a photo and a couple people did and they're so cute#gawwddd idk if now is the right time for anything but i really like him i enjoy his presence immensely#he's so nice he's not absolutely perfect of course but he's such a sweet guy#im thinking of that one tumblr relationship advice post about how the ancients didn't stumble across fully built temples#they found a flat place with good grass and water nearby they found a good place to build and then built#if there's any chance of things happening between us iiii think it's a good place to build#literally my only personal downsides for him are such minor things that could definitely change with age and maturing#it's just a lack of motivation or passion toward things and sometimes a bit of a lack of consideration#but i know im guilty of that too and he really is so nice he never acts maliciously#never at all augh he's so sweet#oscar.exe
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#holy shit guys!#dw and iwtv all back within a week#???#if I had the will to sit down and watch hours of straight amazing television I would#unfortunately the holes in my brain only let me watch garbage#but I will will myself to watch both soon and you WILL be hearing about it once I do#slav#slav every day#voltron
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every time it's the end of the year i feel like i'm going insane like the entire year just culminates into me just mcfreaking losing it on new years eve
#first of all i am so tired. my cat is on this horrible schedule where she wakes up at like 11pm and so i end up staying up to play with#her until like 2am bc im like she slept all day she needs to play which is fine but i get up at 7 every morning and so ive been doing this#for like 2 weeks straight and im so tired. so last night at like 1am i was just playing with her just sobbing bc im so tired#but i feel so guilty just going to sleep when she wants to play so im like im not just going to not play so im sitting my bed#throwing her stupid little yarn for her just crying and she's like :) watching me throw it back and forth im like ok.#but that's whatever bc idc i'll do anything for her#then since saturday there has been this Smell in my hallway and i have looked everywhere for it and i dont even know what it is#but it's like a sour kind of just really irritating smell and it's not strong but it just lingers#and ive searched EVERYWHERE. and nothing is wrong so now i'm thinking maybe#something died on the roof in my bathroom vent fan thing bc i leave my bathroom window open all the time but#last night it was almost completely closed bc it was cold last night and i was like ok yeah it's stronger in here now#so i just taped a trash bag over it to see if it goes away and if that's it then i have to deal with that#also im getting my period so i know that's why im upset at all#then i have a lost package that ive been waiting for since a week before christmas and i was like hey can you guys like help me find my#package like it's not the company's fault but i wanted to know if they could like idk contact the shipper or something#and theyre like oh it's just tracking error :) it's on it's way#like ok. it's in a city an hour away from me and it's been in limbo between ups and usps since the 19th so no it's actually not coming at#all i think but they keep blowing me off#then i have to go to the store right now and i know it's going to be so crowded and anyway ok im done dumping and complaining#i just feel like im drowning rn but im going drink so much champagne tonight and forget it all
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I don't know why most other artists i've faced in my life refuse to help or support or befriend or work with me in any way because they're obsessed with making art a competition. i'm the least competitive person you will ever meet. what's being kind and helpful and supportive and cooperative towards me going to do to you?! i'm not good enough at art to even be a threat if I tried! I don't get why they act like this towards me. I cant do anything to hurt your art career, so why are you trying to hurt mine?! I don't get it.
#anyone else feel this? and dont get it?#and if youre the type of artist that tries to compete with everyone and refuses to support smaller artists but climbs up bigger ones#like a kitten trying to steal food out of their hand....why. why are you like this. why cant you be normal.#why cant we all help and support each other?????????#art#artist#artist on tumblr#small art account#small artist#small creator#lee text#sorry for this random rant. im just tired and disappointed that i cant get other artists to cooperate with me#and stop pulling me into competitions i never signed up for!!!!!!!#im never allowed to be oart of groups or collabs because theyre too strict and elitist and for what#because they think ill try to use them to get ahead??? so they only want artists they can use instead? pathetic and gross mindset!!!#i can never get anyone to talk about this stuff with me. i get ignored as if im the only one noticing or experiencing it#but that might just be because im the only artist not trying to compete with other artists and I SEE US ALL AS EQUALS#you hear that?! none of you are better than me even if you make a million dollars on art. sit your ass down#and none of you are below me either even if you picked up a pencil fkr the first time yesterday!#humble yourself and treat other better and support each other and cooperate more. it might help you in the end#i probably posted about some of the bad artist experiences i had while trying to do a collab and getting bullied rhe whole time#or the new artists i tried to befriend who straight up said theyre better than me and treated me like a fan instead of an equal#that pisses me off lmao i hate that kind of behavior#ok im done back to silly lil guy posting~
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tfw she gets scolded for throwing out pantalone's fancy new trinket purchase because it came in a nondescript box left in the main meeting room - like it's her fault that someone left a boring parcel for however long, and none of pantalone's men bothered to grab it for however long.
#ic | (heard and loved);#crack | (an egg with some toast);#(this is Slightly ooc projecting too but its not my fault for returning mail thats been sitting for two weeks straight-)#(-just because You guys dont have a procedure to actually check the mail properly and frequently)#(THE MAIL IS RIGHT THERE. FOR TWO WEEKS. WHY DO YOU NEED ME TO EMAIL YOU AND BE LIKE 'hi im sending back the mail' FOR YOU TO CHECK)
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shaking some of you by the shoulders and forcing you to confront if your self proclaimed pretentiousness is just an excuse to be casually classist or ableist
#i had a big thing in the tags that no one would care about but they boil down to this:#1) sorry for dropping off for a few days its because i didnt wanna spontaneously deactivate because i do love you guys#but sometimes some of you make me want to straight up deactivate because i feel like im being laughed at or judged#and the ‘oh no ransom i didnt mean YOU when i was mocking something that applies to you’ is (surprisingly!) not fucking comforting!!#and 2) havent wrote a word since it because it just made me feel like shit even tho it was unintentional#and made ny little excitement to start back into my wips just turn to that nauseating fear and insecurity again lol#and 3) again. love you. but for the love of god sit with yourself and ask why do you feel a certain way/think thats okay to say.#what was your intention in mocking something that you KNOW applies to other people. not something fictional like a ship or comic or game.#but something that actually applies to their real life and their ability to do or create something.#like be pretentious! whatever!! but if its motivated by you wanting to feel more superior than other ppl then thats just mean and gross!!!
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One of those texts I kind of need to sit on before I decide how I'm going to word it.
I never know how to start these, but I always have an idea on what to say. Your opinion of me actually matters a lot & the implication that you believe that I lie to you or I'm not doing enough is kinda hurtful. It comes across to me like my effort is worthless to you & that what I want doesn't matter at all. I wouldn't bring it up if I didn't think you cared, and I know you're going through a lot and shouldn't have to worry about me, but I'm getting mixed signals that are really throwing me off. What do you want from me? Am I asking too much of you and you don't know how to tell me? I sincerely want to be there for you, regardless of what it looks like to get to that point, but if you don't want me there you can tell me! What you want matters just as much, if not more, to me. I'm not the kind of person to be hostile about things if they don't work out. I don't want to be another source of stress or negativity for you, and I don't want you to be afraid of being honest with me. I constantly question if you're just too nice to tell me you aren't interested anymore, and even if you are, I might need more reassurance than you can give me because I don't think I'm very worth it to anyone for anything. If you don't think I'm trying hard enough then tell me what I need to do to change that! I'm at the point of just not knowing what I bring to your life, if anything at all. You don't need to deal with me on top of everything else, so, I'm sorry for this. Even if you don't text me back I'll feel better once I get it out there. The only thing I've ever been afraid of is not communicating exactly how much I care about you & how much you mean to me - even if it doesn't matter to you, or you don't believe me. If there comes a day where we aren't in each other's lives anymore for whatever reason, I don't want either of us to question what could've been said or done differently or regret not doing more.
#I'm gonna sleep on this one. This could be a Monday night text. Or tomorrow#I'll refine this better. I think it's important to stress the whole Gemini factor here#REALLY mixed signals. If you want me to go just say it#I don't have time for the bait and switch yknow#I don't even think he's aware. Micheal said it pretty straight up and I know he's probably right#But I will be goddamned if I don't give it my best and most honest shot.#I think about Sean a lot sometimes and how much I miss him. It could make me cry#I never got the chance to tell him anything. To show him I made it#He will NEVER get here. He will always be stuck when and where and how he died and that fucking kills me#That pain and raw grief are what keep me going at this point.... he will never experience life after that moment in time#And I am so scared that the same thing will happen to my s/o and he will walk into it with eyes open#And I can't communicate that fear to him. That profound sadness. Watching a movie over and over and hate the ending#It's *hard*. How many times can I watch it happen? How many times will it keep happening? Take my fucking revolution or whatever#I woke up angry today and im committed to being empty and full of resentment I think#I just want to talk to Sean. He would say the same thing micheal did I bet.#God I really miss him huh. Crying and shit or whatever. I don't have time for this#Sean would laugh at me for crying over some hot guy who I am clearly the side girl to#Lmao I would laugh too. Yeah. Get it together.#It's just another relapse so relax sit back and take a deep breath......
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This school year is going to be like Narak 😭
#Sir ne seating arrangement change kra di#AND HE MADE ME SIT WITH THIS CHUCHUNDAR OF A GUY#i hate him. I hate him. I hate him.#He used to sit near one of my friends (aur if my deduction is right he may have a crush on her-)#AND THIS GUY WAS FUCKING FURIOUS WHEN THE ARRANGEMENTS CHANGED#Like Bhai thand rakh maine thodi na change karayi hai merepe itna gussa kyu?#Iss bande ne bag ek toh chair pe rakha hua tha and when I told him to put the bag down#HE COMPLAINED “YAAR KISKE SAATH BITHAYA HAI MUJHE”#I wanted to throw his bag straight at his face#But I just said “It's not like mujhe tere saath baithne ka shauk hai kahi aur jagah milegi toh tu nikal jaiyo”#And then in lunch time iss chuchundar ne puri bench mein kabjaa kar liya tha#When I came back after lunch Maine use bola ki Bhai hatt ja and#THIS MAN SAID “AREY TU BHI BAITHI THI KI YHA PE ITNI CHOTU SI HEIGHT HAI KI TUJHE DEKHA HI NAHI”#Maine khoon kar dena hai uska#And then this guy asked for a spare pen during eco class#Haha he really expected me to help him#Mere paas pura bhandaar tha pens ka but ek tak nahi diya#I felt sooo good watching him struggle for the whole period kyunki kisine nahi di use pen#Yk because he's a new kid aur pta nahi ye churakar bhaag jaaye or something#Trust issues 🤷#And I complained to my teacher but ofc uss time pe vo Shareef innocent seedha-saadha banne ka natak karta hai#(not saying ki main nahi karti-)#So teacher didn't believe me ki vo itna ghatiya ho sakta hai#Toh unhone bus use mujhe sorry kehne ko bola 😑#I hate this man and agar Aisa hi pure saal chla toh koi hell se Kam nahi hoga ye saal-#Sorry for itna lamba ramble about boring kids stuff but mujhe apna gussa kahi toh nikalna hi tha na-
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light and misa's "relationship" is rlly tragic and fucked but also in an isolated state its really fucking funny. ESPECIALLY if you consider them both to be arospec like i do
#misa is like ''oh light my wonderful boyfriend~!! we need to go on a date we haven't been on one in so long!''#(i know that when you're dating you're supposed to go on dates. so we have to go on a date every so often to assure me that i'm getting a#good grade in Having a Boyfriend something that is both normal to want and possible to achieve)#and then light is like (internally) 'i would literally rather kill myself than spend time with her but i need her for my purposes so i have#to appease her' (externally) ''ok sure i guess misa''#and then they go to a restaurant and misa waits for him to kiss her the whole night (she does not attempt to herself)#meanwhile light just sits there and goes nonverbal for long extended periods of time while he monologues in his head about how to appear#like a normal (straight) human being (spoiler: he's really bad at this)#and every so often he'll be like ''you look nice. this food is good. other boring pleasantries'' while glaring as if he's poisoned her food#THEY LIVED LIKE THIS FOR 4 YEARS.#again. awful. but also kind of fucking funny. gay aroace guy and aroace girl going through the motions of a heterosexual relationship for 4#whole years. they hate each other for sure dawg ToT obvs misa to a lesser extent but i think she definitely had a lot subconscious hate for#light. that only got stronger the longer things went on#also during this time they definitely had sex a Single Time because they got to a point where misa was like we've been dating for like#2 years normal couples usually sleep together way before then...... and light was like. LOUD SIGH. ok#it was terrible. neither of them enjoyed it and they never spoke of it again#gee wonder why that was (holding the ace spectrum behind my back)#anyways they're so awful im obsessed w them. awful apart and even WORSE together. it's beautiful#then you throw L in this mix and it gets even funnier and MORE awful#(he's bi aroace to me btw. for the record)#serena.txt#death note posting
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Current temperature inside of my room right now in the middle of the night whilst about to go to sleep... villain origin story...
#You just get SOOOOO tired of being hot all the time for multiple days straight.. with very little relief ever... hhHHHH#I forget that I literally lose my mind and become evil every summer like clockwork#I don't evenknow what I mean by that because I'm just as calm/monotone as ever lol.. but I just feel more evil.. low level pent up rage#or something. nothing changes on the outside but on the inside it's like hmm.. I'm like 5% more hostile than I usually am#not outwardly expressed still of course. but just.. my bones are made of a little more violence recently..#percentages moving around. My character stats get a temporary modifier all summer where I feel chronically just a LIIIITLE more noticably#unhinged. like I will never do it of course. but I will think about. maybe I'll just throw all the plates at the wall and break every wind#ow with a baseball bat. No. I shant. I would never.. but .. I could. 5% more than I usually could. But I shan't. but let it be known.. I#c o u l d ...i COULD.. if I had to. but I don't.. but still.. keep the notion in the back of the mind.. hmm.. lol#And this is not even during a heat wave at the moment it's just like.. normal summer.. >:')#I think it's also largely the shitty apartment which was not built for coolness. Like older houses will have tall cielings and those window#above the doors and ceiling fans and be built high up from the ground and all these other ways to manage warm weather#naturally. but cheaply constructed dinky city apartments with no ventilation and windows only on one side and blah blah#It retains heat insanely like being trapped in a green house or something#even with all the windows open & fans in the house and stuff it just doesn't really move air well because the space is not made to do that.#Also really testing my anticapitalism/leftism/etc... sitting and thinking 'damn maybe I should play the stock market.. I should sell#some sculptures and overprice them.. howmuch could I charge for these clothes..' < *is desperate to afford a living situation with central#heating and air conditioning*#Haha! Guillotines?? who said anything about those? I LOVE rich people.. haha.. now what's a guy gotta do to instantly get about $50.000 ar#ound here? haha! kidnap someone and sell their organs? okay haha! I love the free market! going to home depot right#now to buy an axe! Don't you just hate taxes? so glad I live in the best country in the world under the best economic system on the planet#USA! USA!! USA!!! *visibly shaking. nose starts bleeding. you notice i am also levitating off the ground slightly*#ANYWAY gfgfgh.... winter......... my sweet child....i miss you so so much.... SUMMER you are my ENEMY#ah well now it's gone down to 80.4 Farenheight. cancel post. thats such an improvemtn surely I'll be able to sleep soundly now /s#what was I ever worried about? it's all good! haha!! *still levitating a little *#In better news - I have finished the Victorian Pharmacy documentary series and am now watching them build a medieval castle! and one of my#goofy joke song snippets suddenly got 6.000 views on youtube which was cool?? though very random? I made kale chips again. and had asparag#us. And saw a duck. carved a lot of things out of avocado pits. Little tidbits to keep me sane..#See a funny little duck outside and go 'hmm... life is okay actually :) I no longer want to break windows :3'#then it gets like 85F inside again and you're liek NEVERMINDaaaaaaahhh!!!!! then you see a duck next morning and calm down :)
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I did Not see a post joking abt 'david Ten/nant when he thinks he's finally escaped doctor who' like we can't get rid of the fucking guy because he won't sit down and let other people have the spotlight for once... He's the cockroach of dw, you just Cannot get rid of him. Is it about the first woman doctor? Nope, Tenn/ant's still fucking here. Is it about the first black man? No sorry it's Still about Tenn/ant except worse.
I would Pay the guy to sit down and shut up but with the amount of work he's doing he clearly doesn't need the cash and isn't here out of desperation.
Tom baker fatigue is out and tenn/ant fatigue is In.
#dw shit#👀👀👀#like dont act that the guy wants out#if he wanted out I'd be cheering#he's Perfectly content to have milestones in the show go back to him in some way#and don't pretend he's not#i just don't think it ever once occurred to the guy that#these are times when he should be sitting quietly#it's not like i think he's being malicious#he just has terminal straight white man disease 😐
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THE MUSICCHDJSJNF.
#hhe finished his speech and now music is playing bbut they're atill fucking.#They're still sitting in the back of this car together completely silent lke i'm imagining the music not there rn.#finishing ur evil villain speech and the other guy just hits you with the 😐 for 2 minutes straight i'd jump out that car.#.txt
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