#this guy is giving me brainworms i Really Really like this idea

[littleaipom]

Alright I've got a new sonic OC for ya: Maroon the Cat. shoutout to @wolfcha1k for helping me come up with this guy

His premise goes that he is a fankid for Sonic & Blaze, but is stolen by Eggman Nega and raised as a super weapon for years without them knowing, with the specific purpose to one day destroy his parents. Being a combination of his parents, and enhanced with robotic parts, he is an insanely powerful foe. After presuming the kid had passed, Sonic and Blaze grieved and moved on, never having another kid. Only years later do they find out that he is still alive and had been raised and abused by Eggman Nega his whole life instead.

[edit: here's a lore ramble about him]

some bonus sketches from the design process:

[aardvaark]

I just developed the Leverage brainworms, and they commingled with the House MD brainworms from when I was super into that show, so I came up with a rough outline for a House MD/Leverage crossover: Parker is in the ER after an injury on the last mission and overhears House loudly complaining to probably Cuddy about how some rich asshole is getting the organ his 16 yo patient needs because the patient got accused of something that he knows is fake. Everyone on the coms is telling Parker that it's not their job, to just drop it, but she fakes a much bigger injury and gets admitted as a cancer patient, so now they have to steal a hospital again.

House clocks Nate almost immediately and agrees to keep Cuddy off of them while they do whatever else they need to do. He also takes on the rich guy's case at the same time as the 16 yo, to keep him in the hospital.

Parker and Wilson get a few scenes together, and she has to talk him through some crime to help them along at some point. Foreman and Hardison get paired off, as well as Chase and Sophie, and Cameron and Elliot. At one point, Sophie and Chase have to fake dating for the case.

House and the team figure out that the rich guy's prognosis is even worse than he'd initially thought, even with the organ, he's not living past a year. This revelation comes at the same time as the Leverage team finding the evidence of the faked stuff that blocked the transplant initially. It's probably at this point that Cuddy is clued into everything as well.

The transplant committee agrees to give the organ to House's patient, and the rich guy gets scammed out of money somehow to pay the other patient's medical bills plus other things.

first of all, congrats on catching the leverage brainworms :) welcome to the party lol. secondly i love the idea of crossing over with house, because you’re so right, nate & house share quite a few major traits and would definitely clock each other! like the two spidermans meme. and the team has had a couple run-ins with medical & hospital settings and, notably, a guy trying to steal an organ, so it fits the jobs they take on very well. timeline-wise, the shows ran at the same time for a bit, too, so that’s nice because the technology level and their ages etc can be consistent.

i think eliot & foreman might bond a bit over their frustrating bosses. i���d love to see the ducklings eventually break into their patient’s house as they often do, and some of the leverage team already being there just like "umm we know what WE are doing here, but why the hell are this kid’s doctors breaking and entering??". and then bond over the whole "ohhh trust me, i know what having a really weird boss is like" thing lol.

also once parker’s recovered enough to sneak around, we def need to see more of parker pretending to be a nurse (eg order 23 job & miracle job) because 1) parker being a little disturbingly happy about being around sharp things (like needles & scalpels) or getting to drug people is always funny, and 2) easy seasons parker trying to comfort people is the best. her flight attendant alias in the mile high job? incredible. "death haunts us everyday :) <3" lmao.

thanks for the ask and infecting me with leverage/house crossover brainworms now too!!

[all-pacas]

ok so. i know kutner isn't one of the characters giving you brainworms the same way the og fellows do but you have good takes on the show in general and so i must get your take on this:

sometimes in discussions about how kutner's death affected the show, people will say something along the lines of "if kutner hadn't died, he would've been the next head of diagnostics rather than chase" because of his similar ways of thinking/tendencies for risk taking. do you think that'd be possible and if so how do you think it'd play out?

I've actually thought about this, because I've also seen those takes. And I don't want to give a cop-out answer, but it's really hard to say, because we get way, way more of Chase — 6 years on the team that we see, two in the OR, plus another pre-series — versus Kutner, who has something like 1.5 considering the weirdness of early S4. To completely generalize, I think Chase probably is a better doctor overall than Kutner (Kutner is more creative/"brilliant," Chase is more of an all-rounder), but it's also an unfair comparison — Chase is older and more experienced — and a completely meaningless one.

Kutner is undoubtedly talented and clever and has that Creative Spark in drove; he also does come off as kind of… inexperienced? There's a running joke that he's sort of a liability; he's a fast learner and develops quickly as a doctor, but he also very much has his weaknesses: he's very friendly, but he doesn't have a great bedside manner (or filter); he has a couple non-defibrillator moments that show he's not great at physical procedures, he's sometimes a bit careless… I don't want to make it sound like he's a bad doctor, because he isn't, but his thing is Creativity and Ideas, right? He comes off as generally inexperienced. He has room to grow. I don't think he would have made a great head of diagnostics as we saw him, because he doesn't have leadership skills, struggles with social skills at times, and is still very much learning how to be a doctor. These are all things Kutner definitely could have gotten better at and grown past, but we never got to see too much of that growth, which makes guessing at his development difficult. He's just… young, you know?

House the show (and House the person) also has a pretty strong thesis along the lines of suffering makes you a better doctor, cynicism makes you a better doctor. We see it time and again with Cameron in early seasons, with her slow turn away from idealism being treated as a positive; we see it with Chase, and how he almost literally physically becomes House in S8. The choice the show presents is become cynical and Houselike, or leave. This makes me think that had Kutner stuck around, he would have had to face a similar crossroads: either lose his sunny idealism (and inexperience), or get out. It's easy for me to picture him as a great diagnostician; it's hard for me to picture him as taking over House's department, because the show pretty clearly equates that (with Chase and Foreman) with being like House.

I can see Kutner choosing to leave and start his own diagnostics department elsewhere because he doesn't want to lose his enjoyment and love of "the game." I can't as easily see him becoming "like House" in the way the show posits is necessary for the job. Or anyway, I don't want to imagine him that way, because Kutner's excitement and enthusiasm are such cornerstones of his character and it would be a shame to lose it. Chase starts the series as a similar (if less intense) version of the same character, and look how worn down he gets. He murders a guy!

The thing is, I don't think Chase was the natural heir to the throne either. I can see why people say "if Chase, then Kutner," as they serve similar roles on the team, but that's very much forgetting that for the first half of the series (Epic Fail seems to be the end point), Foreman was presented as the natural successor to House, and Foreman was treated as House's protege. Creativity and brilliance are part of it, but ruthless, apathetic genius was considered more important by the show, and Kutner doesn't have too much of the former traits (and Chase had to grow into his apathy and lose his morals over time). Nor is inheriting Diagnostics a good thing.

This is something that bugs me about these discussions on who would have or should have or deserved to take over Diagnostics: it's not a good thing. The show is fairly explicit about this. This isn't — IDK, Game of Thrones (rant for another day, asoiaf is also very much about how wanting to rule is a bad thing), this isn't a contest for who gets to "win" and be House. House doesn't want to be House. Chase in Diagnostics in the final episode isn't framed as a triumph. He looks terrified. It is a tragedy. He's become a lonely and cynical person! Hurray! I'd much rather Kutner left and found his own practice and stayed happy than that.

[alpaca-clouds]

Dungeons & Dragons - Or: Why Capitalism Sucks at Making Money

If this past year managed anything, it managed to get me really into DnD. Before I did not play DnD much, rather going with Shadowrun or (heavily homebrewed) World of Darkness. But with first Honor Among Thieves releasing - and then Baldur's Gate 3 giving me brainworms tadpoles... Yeah, hurray. New hyperfixation unlocked.

But as I started to read through all the lore, but also meta stuff happening around it. And yes, I quickly understood why basically everyone was frustrated with Hasbro and Wizards of the Coast. But I also think, that this betrays one of the big issues with capitalist logic and how it often fails to reach an audience - for the reason I outlined before: capitalists are actually super bad at realizing what works and why, because they only judge based on spread sheets.

And yes, the headline is hyperbolic. But let me explain.

A Community-Based Game

I mean, the biggest scandal of DnD this year was probably the entire thing about the community license. And this is very much something that shows quite well, how bad WotC is at recognizing why DnD works and has worked so long.

DnD centrally has been build around this idea of community. Now, mind you: This community was very, very focused on cis white guys for the longest time, but everybody else just managed to get in there and make their own little bit of community. Which also lead to a lot of homebrew stuff, that at times tackled some issues that the rules themselves did not address at all or not well. The combat wheelchair is probably the best known example of this.

But even outside of marginalized communities... DnD always thrived through the community aspect itself. People self-publishing magazines and adventures for it since the fucking 70s. As well as play sets, dice and what-have-you. DnD was always very much about all this and thrived through it. And now in came WotC saying: "Oh, yeah, actually you will now have to give us a big cut. (The big irony was, how Unity made the same move later on.) The fandom outcry was obviously big, there was a boycot, it worked. And WotC went all:

Of course they basically won the world competition in backpaddling (though again, Unity was a big contender this year as well) and quickly went back on this. But of course there is a problem: When your entire product is so much build around community and your community starts mistrusting you, you got a problem.

And this is basically what happened.

The Audience Problem

There is another problem of course. Financially the DnD movie failed - and I actually think this says a lot about how WotC kinda misunderstands the audience.

Now, there will be people trying to tell you, that given that the movie had great reviews and stuff. But the movie had a production budget of 150 million USD and only earned a bit more than 200 million on worldwide box office. Given that the marketing budget was likely around 30 million, the movie barely broke even.

Of course, part of the reason for it was that it just had a bad release date. It released parallel to the Super Mario movie, which ended up being one of the most successful movies of this year.

A friend of mine could not believe that the movie had financially flopped. They were like: "What the hell? Literally everyone I know who watched the movie went to cinema like three times to see it again." But... Yeah, that is true. But the issue is that these people are a very certain group.

Because lets make one thing clear: The people, who adored the movie so much, that they went to the cinema several times and bought the DVD/BluRay on release... were mostly queer nerds. Because this is the group of people who this movie spoke to.

And let's make this clear: I love the movie for this. I love that it so clearly went for this audience. Because I am part of this audience - and I adore this film.

But basically the movie has a general issue in terms of audience. Because on one hand the movie is too nerdy to have a wider audience appeal of people who had never played DnD, while on the other hand the movie was kinda not nerdy enough to go full force for the nerd audience.

A lot of people in the fandom have instantly sussed out one thing about the movie: "Why doesn't Edgin cast any spells? And why do we see so little of the weirder species?" And part of the reason undoubtedly was budget related. But the other reason is that... well, it is currently a well accepted wisdom in media production that you cannot sell a high-magic story. At least not outside of animated media.

Hence... There is surprisingly little magic being cast in this. And we also do have a mostly human main cast - or why Doric is the most classically pretty tiefling you have seen with her human skin tone and all of that. Because media productions do not trust the audience to accept high magic concepts.

Who is DnD actually for?

Okay, let me talk a bit about DnD 5e - and a good decision, and a bad decision. And how that affected DnD.

Everyone, who is somewhat into DnD probably knows that 5e massively changed the game. With one simple goal: Make it more accessible. Which manifested in several ways.

For one, the game was in some ways made less offensive. Because prior to 5e there was a ton of racism, sexism, queerphobia and ableism inherent to the game rules and times to the game lore. This is just a fact. Things like species that are inherently evil and stuff like that - and also some of the real-life racial coding inherent to some of the species. Removing all that stuff is a good thing. Like amazingly good.

And also, they made the rules a lot more accessible. Before the rules were bogged down with a lot of stuff, that was simplified or removed. Again, this is a good thing.

And this worked. It worked really well. Of course, this was also partly due to stuff like Critical Role and other actual plays like that happening and promoting the game. The player base probably increased ten-fold from what it was before.

Yes, it should also be noted that there is probably a good topic for a study on how formerly nerd-thingies became more and more mainstream during the last 10 years or so, but yes, DnD was one of those things.

But in this there was also a rather bad decision made, which ironically also mirrors what happened with Marvel. And this decision is: Because we want to reach a wider audience, every single thing we release for this has to reach the widest audience possible - rather than allowing that certain things might have a more specific audience.

I am sorry to talk about the MCU here, but it is just such a perfect example of this: The MCU basically made two mistakes. Overwhelming their audience with too many releases. But also not allowing the movies to be for a certain audience, but for the broadest audience possible. A good example is how they dealt with the minority-lead movies. They got directors and at times even writers from that minority - but then basically did not allow them to be too specific and be too critical of, for example, a racist system because that might not go over too well with white mainstream audiences.

Now, WotC did not really do anything like that. But they also went with this idea that everything they officially released should have the broadest possible appeal. Hence the weirdly low-magic approach to the movie, of which I assume that it definitely was an executive decision made.

The fact that the movie resonated so much with the queers more than anyone else was also not intended - at least not from the production company. Like, let's be honest. No, Xenk and Ed were not supposed to be read as romantic. And how appealing the found family trope was, probably was not intented at least on the side of Hasbro (not sure about screenwriters and director).

The Lore Problem

This perfectly connects to one of the big issues that all the franchises going for a broad appeal after being very nerd-focused for so long, run into: The Lore Problem. And this is quite ironic, because I ran into the problem earlier this year as well.

See, as I was writing fanfics for DnD:HAT I quickly ran into the problem that I knew next to nothing about the world of Faerûn. Sure, once upon a time (like between 2007 and 2011, while I was living in Austria with my then-boyfriend, who really was into those games) I played the old games of Neverwinter Nights and Baldur's Gate 1 + 2. But let's be frank: I barely remember shit from those games. And getting to understand what actually happened in the lore between and after... Well, there is just a ton of lore. I mean, people are playing around with this world for literal decades. So, yeah. This can very much be overwhelming for someone getting into it anew. Like, where can someone new even start?

The fact that - at least partly for legal reasons - most of the Actual Plays also do not work with the official lore, rather just using the rules to create their own worlds, obviously adds to this. Even the tables I played on so far always preferred original worlds, because the lore of DnD is just very intimidating.

The one thing that actuall ended up getting me into the lore was BG3, because it left open just the right questions to go into the Forgotten Realms wiki and just look for stuff, before also starting to listen to lore podcasts.

But here is the thing: WotC is also not helping with this issue. Like, they absolutel could create a proper accessible compendium on DnDBeyond that would just allow people to get an overview of the world and the timeline of things happening, maybe go into some of the major factions of the world and such. I mean, heck, they really, really want you to use DnD-Beyond rather than roll20. Yet, in DnD-Beyond I do not even have a monster compendium without paying, which roll20 offers.

Like, sure, WotC, it is okay to lock up the adventure modules behind a paywall, no problem. But if you do give me even the most basic tools to run a campaign, I am gonna use roll20, thank you very much.

But yeah, what WotC should make just more accessible was just: Timeline, important places and the maps (heck, make them interactive, you have the fucking money), maybe also a proper list of the pantheons and factions within the world. Heck, add maybe some inspiration there for what players might want to do within one of the scenarios and then, under this, go and link "hey, we made this one adventure about this, if you are interested!"

Something I did not realize originally was how much freedom the lore still leaves the people. Like, often even the important settings and events are just set-ups for adventures that the characters can have in there. There might be a few novels or comics then, that go into an example of a thing certain established characters like Drizzt or Elminster did during the time, but there is a ton of freedom to explore.

But by basically locking everything up behind a paywall, you will never get people even interested in this kinda stuff.

Because here is the thing: I like my lore. I love lore. I adore lore. But... Without BG3 explaining some stuff and giving me specific questions to ask about it, the lore would have been very inaccessible to me.

Just think of people as... people

Of course among it all there lies the central problem that comes with capitalism running something like this. See, whatever CEOs and shareholders are sitting on those chairs with WotC and Hasbro, they do not see the players as players or the community as a community, but as consumers. Just as they see their employees not as valued constributors, but very exchangable wage slaves.

They do not see the value of the community exchange with stuff like fanmade modules and things. While incorporating a bit of homebrew stuff in DnD Beyond, they are absolutely not interested in the wider market of people just creatively interacting with DnD and making a little bit of money from it. If anything they see those people as potential rivals on the market.

Heck, they have issues seeing things like Critical Role or Roll20 as the enrichment for the franchise that either are - but more like potential rivaling forces and money they have lost.

And their employees? Yeah, as we learned... Most people who from the side of WotC helped the Larian team with BG3 have been let go by now. Because WotC and Hasbro do not care for their employees, they only care about having some numbers going up.

I fully admit it. Apart from Buying BG3 and the money I have invested in anything DnD:HAT related, the only money that WotC got from me, was some of the novels I bought on Audible.

But here is the thing: WotC is doing a shite job at wanting me to invest into any of their stuff. Partly because those modules I would like to have are not available anywhere anyway - and partly because... As I said, give me a reason to get something, rather than just expecting me to randomly get something.

And mind you, this is no slight against any of the people just working for WotC. This is mostly about shareholder and executive decisions made. Stuff that basically just sees either their employers or the players just as a ressource to exploit, rather than... people.

[rampagingfanfictioner14]

relativity falls, but... (Part 2.5)

I realize that I've kinda been straying from the original relativity falls au with a random Bill, lol. I think my idea for him is really going into an AU, so I'll make it separate from this post. @canadianno-gravityfalls mentioned that some people swap gideon and bill as the main antagonist, but honestly I'm not sure I could give the idea justice! I've never been good at writing gideon. The concept definitely has some merit, though. For the sake of this post I've decided to just stick Bill as Bill, but that's subject to change.

Anywho, I've got a dozen brainworms squirming around inside my head and they want out. Continuing on from the last post:

In his sleep, Mason encounters a strange triangle-shaped creature. Bill Cipher, it introduces, with a voice that seems both eerie and cool at the same time. He does overreact a teensy bit at the thing's appearance, but once the screaming wears off, he settles somewhat. Initially, he actually wonders aloud if he was just dreaming this interaction up to make up for the failed summoning attempt.

Bill's quick to assure him that no, he's definitely real, and that Mason's in luck! Bill's here to tell him the secrets of Gravity Falls... and quite possibly the universe too, if he wants.

"So, whaddya say, kid? Wanna shake on it?"

A hand lights up with blue fire, thrust forward as an offering.

Mason frowns at it.

"It's a simple agreement," Bill entices, waving it closer. "A mutual understanding, if you will! Think of all the mysteries you could uncover! Wouldn't that be nice?"

Something about the almost unnoticeable urgency in the triangle's voice sets off alarm bells in Mason's mind. The scientist raises an eyebrow, not buying a word of what the demon says. "...Sure," he drags out, pointedly keeping his hands stuffed into his jacket pockets. "I bet you say that to all the smart people you meet. What's your deal, man?"

Bill's eye narrows. He doesn't appreciate Mason's open scepticism. Still, he's not one to give up so easily. He sighs dramatically and proclaims that he's the one who's inspired every major human pioneer; talking about his status as a "muse" and the whole shtick; probably saying something like: "just take a look at your dollar bill if you don't believe me, smart guy! I've been rubbing elbows with presidents before you were even a twinkle in your father's eye!"

Realization strikes. Mason frowns and holds up his hands in the universal gesture of wait. "Woah, hey, hang on. Let me get this straight. You say you're a muse, and you pick one great mind a century to inspire, right?"

Bill points a finger at him and mimics shooting a gun. "Got it in one!" He praises, inwardly bemoaning the fact that by Axo, he'd picked a slow one. Didn't he just say that?

Mason smiles, as if the demon had just confirmed something for him. "So you must've met Einstein! People don't get much smarter than that guy." He slaps his hand to his forehead as if just realizing something. "Oh, and Pavlov! Did you meet him, too?"

Ah, Bill thinks gleefully, gotcha.

"Sure I did, kid! What's your point?"

"My point is that they're both from the same century," Mason deadpans, his smile falling off his face. He crosses his arms over his chest. "So either one of them is secretly a time traveller, or you're feeding me a bunch of malarkey. Time to own up, you tricky little isoceles. What do you want with me?"

It's probably at this point that Bill realizes that the whole "inspirational muse from higher plane" thing isn't going to work with the cynical lil shit that is Mason Pines.

So he switches gears.

"I thought you might catch on to that!" He cackles. He mimics swiping sweat off his brow in relief and circles Mason, glowing a bright yellow. "Sorry, sorry, I just had to check, y'know? Can't tolerate those gullible types."

Mason raises an eyebrow.

Bill continues, unbothered. He subtly shifts through a couple of Mason's memories, picking through his deepest insecurities, his fears, his losses. He wants to know what makes this smartass tick.

And aha! There he had it.

A twin sister. The fallen star to Mason's constellation.

At first he doesn't let his true knowledge show. He knows that Mason would instantly get suspicious and shut him out entirely if he suspects that Bill has an ulterior motive. Instead, he starts up a casual conversation about anomalies, showing the man a few of the things he'd seen over the course of his long life. He tries to keep the more mind-melty stuff off limits, because dang these humans were weak when it came to that sort of thing.

(Their silly concepts of morality and ethics were amusing to toy with, though).

Mason's still sceptical, but he's also a nerd. Especially about anomalies. He's initially hesitant to talk, but Bill has a way of coaxing people to do what he wants. And once Mason starts rambling, Bill sits back and enjoys the show.

Bingo.

Despite whatever Bill says, he does have an interest in what Mason's studying. Weirdness was his specialty, after all. And Gravity Falls was one of the weirdest places on Earth he'd seen.

They fall into a sort of routine. They see each other every time Mason falls asleep, they greet each other, and Bill bears witness to Mason's ramblings. It's somewhat amusing, listening to this brilliant foolish human go from talking about how the digestive system of a stomach-faced duck may function to something as mundane as his non-existent love life.

Bill listens to what the man has to say, and Mason realizes the demon's actually a pretty nice companion, who offers pretty sound advice, despite his concerning occasional homicidal tendencies.

Mason also realizes that dang, his social life must be absolute trash if his only friend was a literal geometric shape from some distant unknown dimension. Still, he's too much of an anxiety-ridden mess to keep contact with anybody from the town (except for very occasional calls with Soos and Candy), and even if he did, it's not like anyone would ever want to be near him.

How could they, when even his own twin sister had thrown him away?

So Mason does nothing to stop the blossoming friendship between man and triangle. After getting over his initial wariness with the guy, he enjoys it, even, having someone to banter with. Whenever he's with Bill, Mason feels calm. Happy, even. He feels that, just for a few precious, wonderful moments, he could forget about Mabel and ignore the crippling depression that dragged him down every day.

(It helps that Bill's just generally making himself as unthreatening as possible).

"After all, I'm just a triangle," Bill reasons. "What am I gonna do? I can't even leave your dreams."

He has a point, of course. Mason believes him.

The routine continues without a hitch. Mason thinks he might as well have known this guy for most of his life, with all the time they spent together. How long had it been since he read that spell? A few months? A year? It seemed like forever ago.

"Say," Bill says one day, "it's seems almost like destiny that a guy like you is studying this town."

Mason pauses from his most recent rant about the Hawktopus, a fickle creature that irritated him simply by existing. A bunch of gold-blue journals floated in the starry space that was his mindscape (as Bill had explained previously), the backdrop of the Big Dipper illuminating their surroundings. "...Huh?"

Bill floats closer, his hands locked behind his back. "I mean, you've got an anomaly of astronomical odds right there on your forehead, and you never once thought about what it means?"

The scientist rubs the back of his neck somewhat sheepishly. "No, I... It's just a birthmark," he tries to explain. "Nothing much to study. Just a big coincidence. A really, really big coincidence."

Bill bursts out laughing. "Haha! You don't really believe that, do you, Dipper?"

Mason stiffens at the nickname, just like he'd known he would. Bill thinks he needs to tread carefully from now on.

"...Dipper?" The scientist repeats, his voice going flat. "Why'd you call me that?" He's knows that the triangle's fond of random nicknames (to the point where he actually suspects he's forgotten his name), so doesn't instantly get suspicious, but his walls slowly start coming up anyway.

(Never let it be said that this man is not paranoid).

"Eh, it's not like it's a hard name to come up with," Bill dismisses. "You've got the Big Dipper practically seared into your skin, kid!" His eye widens comically. "What, don't you like it? I thought you humans were fond of that sort of thing."

He floats closer, almost pressing against the man. His eye scrutinizes the man with a gaze that feels entirely too sharp. "You look upset. What's the problem, Mason?" He pointedly doesn't use the nickname again, his eye blinking slowly, as if confused.

It makes something uncomfortable tighten in Mason's chest.

He takes a moment to gather his thoughts and answer the question.

"Uh, nothing."

It's just a stupid name, Mason grumbles to himself. Why was he being weird about it? Bill's right. He's just being petty. There's no way that someone else wouldn't be able to connect the dots (literally) and give him the same nickname as... y'know.

But Mabel had come up with it first. It didn't feel right.

Mason shrugs and avoids Bill's gaze, picking absently at his shirt. "I just didn't expect it, I suppose. I stopped going by that name a pretty long time ago."

If Bill had a mouth, it would be stretched wide into a self-satisfied grin. "Why?" He inquires innocently.

...And everything spirals from that moment onwards.

Bill takes advantage of Mason's emotional vulnerability whenever he talked about his lost twin sister. He uses the man's childhood nickname, Dipper, deliberately to make him subconsciously trust him more (i.e. like he did with Ford, calling him 'Sixer').

He knows that he needs to deal with this gently: one wrong move, and he could lose this potential pawn forever. He offers reassurances and calms the scientist's anxious mind down; a steadying presence in the wake of a crushing disaster.

And Mason laps it up.

Much like how the teens manipulated Mabel, Bill manipulates Mason. He's not above prying into the man's deepest fears and making them a "reality" in the form of nightmares, appearing only at the end as the only comforting presence, forcing Mason to rely on him for emotional support. He needs Bill to calm his mind down, to stop the spiralling thoughts in his head from getting any louder.

Bill finds that Mason's surprisingly easy to manipulate once his twin was brought into the equation. The shooting star seemed to influence her constellation's actions even after she'd burned away.

And Bill finds it pathetic. A scientist as smart as Mason, still longing after a bootleg, girl version of him who'd flounced out of his life a long time ago.

Yeesh. Talk about emotional issues.

Mason doesn't make the connection between his nightmares and Bill. He assumes the recent surge in terrors is due to him finally opening about Mabel after years of keeping it shut tightly in a box at the back of his mind. So he welcomes Bill's comfort when the terrors finally fade, and only falls deeper into the trap laid by the crafty lil triangle.

Unlike Ford and Bill, who had this whole "god-like" relationship between each other, Mason and Bill's is... well, far more personal, for lack of a better word. Bill's the closest thing that Mason has to a true friend. And to Bill, well... he's Bill. He's never not going to see Mason as a means to get what he wants, but perhaps there's some misplaced sense of affection in there as well. Something like what a human might feel when they look at a small, defenceless furry animal.

Cute, sure. Maybe even lovable. It helps that the guy's as weird as they come.

But not smarter. Not better.

Nothing but a pet.

There's no talk about "muses from a higher plane" or "a scientist who's going to change the world", though Bill does try to goad Mason into thinking that his birthmark is destiny calling him to Gravity Falls, for a higher purpose.

Mason's nonexistent sense of self esteem kinda goes against that, though. The guy's initially very hesitant to believe he's something special, brushing off Bill's offhanded comments at underhanded attempts at praise.

But... after a bit, he actually does fall for it. Not immediately, no: maybe after a year or so.

(Dipper as a character isn't incorrigible. If Bill gives him no reason to doubt his intentions, then why would he? He's not paranoid enough to listen to some random thousand-year-old warnings when the "demon" was being so nice to him. Not without the journals or the mantra of "trust no one" to influence his thoughts, which is where most of canon-Dipper's wariness stemmed from. Imagine having no-one to properly talk to for years, and this one guy shows up and listens to you. He doesn't judge, he doesn't complain. He's the only rock in your constantly changing world, the only thing left to rely on when you spiral, the only friend you have. Who wouldn't fall for his tricks?)

Remember, Mason's not as detached from his twin as Ford is. He misses Mabel, misses her so much that it physically hurts him to think about her for too long. If there's anything that could distract him from the gaping hole in his heart, of course he's going to chase after it.

Nobody likes feeling all terrible and depressed all the time. No one likes remembering their losses, especially with no closure to what had happened.

So, in the end, despite having a different relationship to Bill and Ford in canon, ultimately the results are the same.

Mason builds a portal for Bill. Why wouldn't he? The triangle's assured him that they could make it stable, and Mason's nothing but too curious for his own good. Plus, maybe he'll actually have a physical form of Bill to interact with for once. Soos and Candy were great, but Mason's never truly gotten along with either of them much.

Sure, Soos was a great guy. He was smart and funny and always looked out for Mason when it became clear he was burning out. And Candy... well, she was a genius. Great with engineering, great with children, but not so much other adults. At least they shared that one thing in common.

But Mason knows he can't call on them to help with the portal he was making. They'd drifted apart after all those years, to the point where he wasn't even aware of where they lived. Plus, it had become clear throughout their years of university that Soos was far too accident-prone for all his skills, and last he heard, Candy had a family to tend to --- not to mention that asking for her help would involve an actual conversation, and he's really unsure if he could talk normally without Bill to calm him down.

(...The guy's really gotten far too dependent on that triangle. Yeah, that's gonna end well, huh? >:))

So, the problem arises: how can Mason build a fully functioning interdimensional portal if he has neither the skill nor the muscles necessary?

Bill offers up a solution: "Wouldn't everything be so much easier if I talked to them instead?"

Mason waves a hand dismissively, still pacing in his mindscape, the light from the Big Dipper's stars casting a soft glow on his face. He doesn't even cast the triangle a glance as he ponders over his latest problem. "You know you can't, Bill. You're stuck in my mind, remember?"

Bill hums, his eye widening in amusement. "Sure, but I've got powers like nothing you've ever seen, slick! Howsabout we make a deal, eh, Dipper?" In an eerie parallel to when they'd first met, he thrusts forward a flaming blue hand, waggling his eyebrow enticingly. "I could take over your body for you, and we could be done with all those silly human talks before you could say 'Bill Cipher!' All you gotta do is shake my hand."

Mason hesitates, his hand reaching for the triangle's almost instinctively, before he draws it back. "You... You won't throw me off a cliff or something, right?" He asks apprehensively.

Bill laughs out loud, but it's in somewhat genuine tone that he replies, "Not even if I wanted to." He still needs a pawn, after all. It helps that Mason's rather adorable. Like a puppy.

Mason smiles in relief, and reaches forward, sealing his fate.

---

Not my au, not my characters, just my take on both! :)

Part 3

[neko-naruto]

sugar and spice, but not so nice

Summary: Riff's definitely not hurting for a Pop Troll, regardless, Barb offers to lend him a hand in getting Floyd's attention

Warnings: swear words censored when spoken by Pop Trolls cause its funny, there is tension and its almost sexual

Authors Note: the fliff brainworms got to me guys, I couldn't stop myself the second I got a keyboard in hand, it just happened. hope ya'll enjoy, and if you do consider dropping a reblog or checkin' the ao3 port

"Really, Riff? That Pop freak is the Troll you're jonesing for?" Barb asked.

Riff just nodded and Barb had the audacity to laugh, "What's so funny about it?"

"Oh nothing, it's just that he's the epitome of sugar, spice, and everything nice," Barb stated boldly, almost abrasively at that. She looks so very, very disappointed in Riff, "C'mon man! There's so many rockers and you choose a Pop troll! We got Death, we got Punk, we got Thrash- and you choose someone who clearly isn't any of the above."

"He's sort of like, Pop Punk," Riff said, "But he could totally pull a death scream if he wanted too."

Barb scoffed, "He's pink, he's so pink it makes me want to vomit."

"Magenta," Riff corrected sharply, "His hair is magenta and white, we could introduce him to hair dye."

"That's illegal in Pop," Barb said, "He'd be staked if you dyed his hair."

"Then he could stay in Rock, until it faded out, just for a little bit," Riff said.

Barb gave a faux gag and the tuft of her tail puffed up, "You're gross."

Riff props the rim of his toque up with the blunt end of his drumstick, "How about Viva? Isn't she also a Pop troll?" He's pushing his luck, he's pushing it harder than he thought he ever would.

"Let's move onto the next subject," Barb swiftly answered with, quick to defend her own sanctity of being a Rock Troll who definitely isn't out for a Pop Troll. A Pop Troll without any Rock tendencies, because she'll admit it, Floyd has some Rock potential despite everything. "Hair dye. You want to dye his hair for a date?"

"To help him blend in more," Riff answered with, tail flipping back and forth, "I'd really like to perform some music with him."

"I'll pull some strings for you, my shockingly smart friend," Barb answered with.

-/-/-/-

Floyd is the one who chose the song, he's the one who chose the list of songs he wanted to perform. And all of them were shockingly raunchy, shockingly explicit, very unbecoming of a Troll whose origin is Pop. It shocks Barb more than it does Riff, she just stares at the list and reads over them while Floyd looks at her like a puppy.

"Lemme just," She pauses, then speaks, "Nine Inch Nails?"

"If you don't mind," Floyd tacked on before she could further question.

Barb laughed a bit, "Please, I love them, woulda been a fan since day one but I wasn't quite born yet. But the songs?"

Floyd can't quite form a verbal answer, just give this sheepish grin. Barb swears his fringe falls a little further over his eyes and she's bold enough to reach out a paw and bat it away. The bleached section is frail, it feels like hay compared to what still retained that magenta hue she mocked. He almost lurches back, his fur just stands on end, and Barb pulls back her hand.

"Personally, I like them. But singing about fucking someone to feel alive doesn't seem your speed, isn't there a weird Pop language barrier?" Barb asked, "Or that one line from a different song, 'I am a good boy and I will swallow it all,' Floyd, that's an amazing song but jeez."

"I thought it'd be funny, cause whenever I try and swear it just," He pauses, trying to find out how to describe it before settling on just swearing, "F*ck, a$$."

Barb laughs until her stomach hurts at the garbled intentions of swearing that Floyd manages to provide. The Pop swear barrier has never been funnier in her entire life, but the fact he can enunciate enough to get the idea of an expletive across is impressive. Trolls like Poppy can barely say 'frick' without a large censor forcing itself in place, but Floyd? He's almost broken it.

"Alright kid-"

"I'm older than you,"

"Same difference; I'll cue up the songs for you and Riff,"

"You aren't joining?"

"Not unless you want me too, might hog the spotlight, sorry if I do," A small giggle snort, "It would be fun to try and go at it with a Pop Troll."

-/-/-/-

Riff stares.

He stares the entire fucking show.

He can't help it really, eyes stuck on a Troll like Floyd as he just drums out the beats and Barb strums out the additional bass lines. It's a comfort really, having someone in the back man the soundboard for the industrious instruments they can't quite do as a trio.

He holds on tight to whatever sense of sanity he can grasp whenever he gets gifted a glance at Floyd's face. He really is head over heels, he really is deep in this pit, for a Pop Troll of all genres. Albeit, a Pop Troll that's belting out songs of the industrial rock genre with an uncanny amount of ease. But still a Pop Troll, still something he'll be disowned over at the dinner table even if Barb goes public with Viva.

He'll just take this if he can't get anything else.

He'll take performing songs with his two favorite Trolls over nothing any day of the week.

-/-/-/-

Post show jitters reside comfortably on Floyd's fur, splayed atop an amp larger than he is with his tail lazily thumping on the material. His chest is heaving and he's curling and uncurling the mic cord around a finger, painted nail scratching at the plastic so rarely.

"Good show," He manages, voice cracking just a bit with how much he stressed it trying to break the Pop swear barrier for one song. He failed to do so, but he still tried until he felt like he was passing out, vision nearly going spotty. It was more fun than he'd ever had performing with his brothers.

Riff takes a heavy breath, "Great show," He's giving this long exhale that's almost a laugh as he speaks.

"Amazing show, I should go work an after party," Barb mused.

"Aw, is your girlfriend rubbing off on you?" Riff teased, rolling onto his stomach where he lay on the cold, hard, concrete ground. It eased his nerves, they were still on fire, the layers of denim and torn fabric probably didn't help much.

"Girlfriend? Tell me more, Riffy," Floyd said before he could stop himself, glancing down at the navy Troll from where he lay.

"Barb has a crush on Viva," Riff drawled as he pulled himself into a criss crossed position, one leg over the other. Floyd nearly laughs.

"Hey man! We agreed not to talk about her," Barb snapped as she stood up from her chair. She stretched her arms over her head and her tail snapped to punctuate her sentence, "Not like you can talk either."

Floyd raises a brow, "Tell me all about it, Barb," he lets his legs sway over the edge of the amp.

Riff sends Barb a pleading look, a begging look, desperation impossibly clear on his partially obscured face.

She just grins, "Well, our friend here has a crush on a Pop Troll. A fella trying to change genres when no one's looking," She winks at Floyd and watches as Riff tries not to respond to the words viscerally, that would give it away and he's highly aware that Barb is trying to play him like the cheap kazoo he is.

"Controversial," Floyd managed to supply, "But fun, inter-genre relations are still kind of, ya know."

"Yeah, kind of," Riff answered with, "Rock Trolls are wide open to the idea in my experience. We legalized polyamory a hundred some odd years ago. We're working on the papers for inter-genre stuff as we speak."

Floyd laughed, "I should just, live here as a Rock Troll. Pop Rock, Pop Punk, Pop Thrash- I could make it work."

"That you could," Barb said, there's this twisted grin on her face, showing off all of her fangs, "But really, I gotta catch that after party, you two can chat."

It's a segue into a conversation really, a shoe in for them to continue speaking as she leaves. She wants this as much as Riff does, maybe if she gets him with Floyd he'll let her fawn over Viva in peace.

Riff just taps his drumstick on the ground, balanced between fingers and tapping back and forth. Floyd just stares at Riff from the amp comfortably, sort of like a cat on a high perch.

"So this mystery Troll, tell me more," Floyd prompts as he slides off of the amp, "If you want too."

And Riff does want too, he wants to tell Floyd everything, but he bites his tongue. He just shrugs, "Nice guy really, probably heading back to Pop sooner than later."

"Pop? Are you crushing on JD?"

Riff shudders, "No offense, but he's too Country coded."

"Did you just call my brother Country coded?" Floyd asked with this devilish smirk, slowly stepping closer to Riff as he goes.

"Am I wrong?" Riff countered with a nervous chuckle.

"Never said you were, but continue about this Troll," Floyd urged, if he just reached out he could trace his hands across Riff's face. Learn every contour, twirl a finger through his hair, that would be nice, that could also be the adrenaline talking.

"Right, right," Riff stalled, what else he could say that isn't virtually outright saying that it's Floyd? Not a whole lot, "Got a great voice, an amazing voice with even greater range. It's scary really, he just hops on stage and gets into it, like he's a different person."

Floyd's tail flicks just a bit, Riff doesn't notice the tell that the Pop Troll is onto him.

"And then he starts to sing, most Rockers have deep voices naturally, but this breath of fresh air, a blend of Pop and Punk? It's amazing," Riff overexplained, just going off, "I'm talking too much, aren't I?" He looks up to find Floyd much, much closer than before. Red instantly rises to the Rocker's face, a stark contrast to his usual hue.

"No," Floyd said quietly, the flow of words pausing just enough to make Riff worry. He comes to a complete halt when the gap is small enough their knees are almost knocked against each other, "Keep going."

"I would," Riff begins, drawing out the syllables as he stares at Floyd through the blur of black hair and fabric alike. He brings a paw to run through his hair and it knocks back the toque just a bit, "But, I don't know what else there is to say without totally blowing the covers," He pauses, "He's really pretty."

"It's me," Floyd declares.

"It is," Riff confirms.

The Pop troll places a gentle kiss to Riff's forehead, one of the few spots where frizzy black hair isn't splayed over his fur. He rears back just a bit, "That's pretty fuckin' sweet," He doesn't even realize the Pop swear barrier dissolved entirely for a brief moment.

"Pretty fuckin' sweet," Riff echoes back before pushing aside a chunk of Floyd's fringe to return the motion. He almost flinches back from it, expecting the contact to sting or ache with how frail that performance left him, but it doesn't. It just feels nice, a warmth sprouting all over his body, it tingles and he loves the sensation.

"You should go tell Barb, we could pressure her into telling Viva," Floyd proposed, "That'd be fun, no?"

Riff is reeling, it took a moment for it to catch up but he is fucking reeling when it finally does. His eyes widen just a bit, there goes the boldness of adrenaline, "That actually happened," He tentatively places his paw on Floyd's, it isn't shoved off, "Oh my god it actually, it happened."

"Yeah man," Floyd said, pressing another chaste kiss to Riff's face, this time his cheek, "It did, and I'll do it again."

Before he freaks out he manages to collect himself enough to breath, "Let's go find Barb, she's been listening to me talk about you for a while now."

"Oh? So this crush isn't a new development?" Floyd teased gently.

"Not at all. But her thing for Viva? That's new," Riff countered with a laugh, it's nervous, just to fill the silence, "But us, we're a thing, those kisses?"

"Those kisses made us a thing," It's a calm reaffirmation, a promise with the squeeze of a paw.

"See, that's new, newer than Barb's crush on Viva," Riff explained, "Which is why we need to find her and tell her."

"You're freaking out,"

"Oh absolutely, you just kissed me, why wouldn't I be freaking out?"

[mandiips]

BORUTO-VERSE RE-IMAGINING

Fourth War Casualties

New Konoha

Hello Boruto fandom, Never once watched Boruto, never even got past the Kazekage Rescue Arc, personally I think Ikemoto is a bit off his rocker because- how in the world did you manage to make this world even MORE sexist but y'know

so I'm having fun with what i would have liked to see in the next gen, as an original fan, and I am desperately trying to get rid of the ninja brainworms that have gripped me before workflow picks back up. (I'm actually going crazy on Milanotes)

I did some other rough brainstorming in the past and this is kinda building off that: Boruto Hinata

Thoughts:

It strikes me as really odd, for how catastrophic and world-ending the fourth war was, that there were seemingly no major repercussions or casualties. That's just not realistic to me. More than one main character should've died. It gives more emotional weight to someone like Kiba, who doesn't have any big role beyond the War, and thus gives his character a purpose that isn't just "Im gonna be Hokage #57"

The front lines weren't the only places being targeted, villages and safe houses were under siege, resulting in countless civilian, genin, and chunin deaths.

Mei stays Mizukage instead of that spineless, random guy.

I have some ideas for the injuries that the "crippling wounds" category sustains, but it's important to mention that "crippling" only means "not fit for active shinobi duty" since that's the bread and butter job of ninja society, so the severity of the injuries varies greatly.

I'm also aware that medical ninjutsu is like a magic eraser when it comes to stuff like that, but I rationalize that medics were more concerned about helping their patients survive rather than making sure their patients will be able to fully recover. Everyone in the injured category went too long without the proper surgery because they wanted civilians and lower ranks to have access first. Even then, the medical team was stretched extremely thin, so- consequences.

Retired: again, in context of "retired from shinobi duty". Majority still have active jobs. Alongside T&I, Ino still runs her flower shop; Tenten sets up a weapons shop right next to it; Shizune is the volunteer hospital head, meaning she doesn't get paid much, and tutors/helps/does paperwork (Sakura is a top medic who occasionally visits for emergencies- she's mostly busy with medical-related missions); Kurenai and The Boys™ teach at the academy; Karui's teammate, Omoi, moved with her to Konoha and he is now the best babysitter in town- though really he mostly looks after Chōchō and Shikadai when their parents are busy. He lives with Karui and her family, they're like siblings.

Konohamaru, Moegi, and Udon were all trained under Naruto during the blank period. However, Moegi was the only one able to reach her full potential because she managed to escape the War with no major wounds. She is now currently stronger than Canon Konohamaru Sensei was.

Marriages:

Nara Shikamaru & Nara Temari

Akimichi Choji & Akimichi Karui

Yamanaka Ino & Yamanaka Sai

Uchiha Sasuke & Haruno Sakura

Shinki, Mitsuki, and Kagura were all part of a Transfer Student Project. All willingly went, All are now full citizens.

I really didn't see Metal or any of the other evicted teammates serving a purpose to the Narrative.. Maybe Metal still exists in the future, the others I do not care about I'm sorry.

I just fucking hate Inojin

Kawaki was adopted when Boruto was around one (1) and a half. Himawari wasn't conceived yet.

Jonin Sensei and Teams:

Team Four (4): Shino, Sarada, Kawaki, Boruto

Team Eight (8): Karui, Iwabe, Kagura, Shikadai

Team Seven (7): Anko, Sai, Shinki, Sumire, Chōchō, Mitsuki

[eff-plays]

one thing i find funny about AA stans is like, all the other spawn have just as much of a "right" to ascension if we're playing by the "he's traumatized so he gets to kill 7k people" logic. but i think if you said fuckin idk petras should get to become the vampire ascendent people would (rightfully) call you fucking insane

i know that a big part of that is because the player gets to know (and be manipulated by) astarion but still. fuck those other trauma victims they can get turned into goop ig. i'm a vampire lord petras truther now though i don't even know if i'm spelling his name right. is this even comprehensible i've taken so much benadryl

God ur so right tho. AA stans tend to be like "well those guys are evil and feral and they're not Astarion and we don't know them so they could definitely be a danger", completely missing the entire fucking point. Or they're like "unlike those bleeding-heart spawnies, it's a sacrifice I'm willing to make for my pookie", you know, Lord Farquaad style. It's really funny how the 7k people just get brushed under the rug for when they have to argue that it's the good ending, or it gets a feeble "well they could be a danger to society/the environment" or a full mask-off "I don't give a fuck about anyone but Astarion".

I also love that one post that tried to argue that not liking A!A means you hate victims of abuse, or that you think that they should be "perfect victims" to deserve sympathy, implying that Astarion's literal murder and abuse of others is just his way of coping and is actually sooooo valid and you're ableist if you disagree. Also implying that Spawn!Astarion (and by extension, Astarion in general) is a perfect victim (???) who just takes the abuse and "forgives it" and not the guy who stabs his abuser 5948487 times and makes his problems everyone else's until that point.

Like. Actual brainworms. People are using social justice language to defend objectively harmful ideas, just because they get off on rich cock. Girlies, you're embarrassing. You're endorsing the cycle of abuse, and it's called a cycle for a reason. And if you genuinely believe Astarion deserves to kill/abuse others (NOT including Cazador, I'm very much for Astarion killing that guy) just to cope with his own trauma, then you're insane, and also incorrect, sorry. It's the same excuse abusers make: "Well it happened to me and broke me forever, I just can't help my actions, it's how I cope with my trauma!" Like. No. S!Astarion literally says he breaks the cycle of violence and terror, but A!A stans argue that no, keep it going, it's sooo valid, because you're a victim and you deserve to hurt others.

Like I said, it's the Cullen shit all over again. And to me that's the true ableism, to imply that trauma permanently breaks you, inherently makes you cruel and and violent and incapable of controlling your actions, destined to repeat the cycle just to get yours. Destined to abuse others and incapable of change, of becoming better than those who hurt you.

Anyway. Sorry went off on a rant there. I actually have an extended canon where Petras is the main bad guy and Critter has to hunt him down with the help of Wyll and Phoebus' cool and hot son. And Petras is kind of trying to become an ascendant vampire there. So I support this.

[mixelation]

brainworms of the day: reborn au con shenanigans

i posted before about tori and kakashi going to a ninja fiction con like a tired older sibling taking his kid sister to a con. and i like the idea of them repeating this, because like. kakashi isn't super into interacting with fandom but he likes merch and he gets a kick out of seeing cosplays, and tori likes company and kakashi is pretty cill when he's not actively being a troll. so cons are like Their Thing and kushina gets very mushy over the idea of them bonding so obviously minato always gives them the time off

anyway i had some thoughts for shenanigans

thought one: minato canonically really likes icha icha and i think he deserves to have some fun. at first i was like "i don't think the hokage gets many vacation days, and surely if he DID take a vacation he'd spend it with his family?" but then i remembered he can teleport. minato takes days off all the time with the idea his assistant will just summon him back if there's a problem. he shows up unannounced in a pair of sunglasses

minato: i'm incognito :)

random passerby: the fourth hokage and hatake kakashi group cosplay? this place gets less and less original every year

kakashi and tori are unsure of this addition to their group because this is Their Thing. kakashi gets over it pretty quick because he does like getting casual time to hang out with minato, actually, but tori is annoyed because first of all. how is she supposed to behave normally* if her boss is here. secondly now everyone keeps asking her why SHE'S not in matching cosplay.

minato: do you want my cloak? lotta people in cloaks

tori: NO I DON'T, ACTUALLY

*everyone who knows tori would like to point out that the only change in her behavior is a 15% reduction in swearing.

anyway i am getting a kick out of imagining actual hokage and infamous ninja namikaze minato waiting in the same-day registration line. squatting in a two hour line to get into one of the big panels. taking photos with other minato cosplayers. holding back tears because there's a fourteen year old kakashi cosplayer with a sERVICE DOG ALSO IN COSTUME!!!!!!!!

thought two: sasori crashes a con because he wants to pass on intel about orochimaru or soemthing

tori: oh my god WHY are you HERE

sasori: because you're closer than deidara >:(

tori: no i mean, in public? in the crowded dealER'S ROOM?

sasori: who's going to notice?

(a group of sasoris in ugly wigs pass by)

anyway the true shenanigan-y part of this is that initially kakashi thinks a weird 25 year old man is chatting tori up. which like. yes? technically true? but kakashi thinks this is just tori falling for the wiles of a hot cosplayer and that he needs to intervene immediately because she's FIFTEEN, you PERVERT--

kakashi: hi :) who's this :)

tori, feeling her spirit leave her body: he likes my sasori fic

sasori:

sasori, in pain: yup. i. do. that's what this is.

kakashi: oh :) how nice :) then i'm sure you won't mind me standing here while you chat :) sharpening my kunai which are totally just props :)

thought three: i think in her later teens/early twenties, tori starts falling back on I HAVE A BOYFRIEND really frequently to get out of conversations. like in theory the card is for "a guy is hitting on me" but she'll also play it for "someone is talking to me and i don't want them to be."

in konoha this strategy works because even if you were just telling her the cafe is closing in five minutes, "but i'm waiting for my boyfriend, uchiha itachi :(" is enough to give this random poor employee pause. these words have meaning in konoha. however i think there's some Shenanigans to be had for her doing this without thinking about it at a con where context is very different.

man she's trapped with bc they're in line and he won't stop trying to get her to give him her room number: boyfriend? prove it.

tori, exasperated: (pulls out a photo she keeps on her)

man:

man: that's uchiha itachi

tori: exactly

man: .....you honestly expect me to believe that? you clearly just have that on you because you're a fan

tori: .....fuck

for bonus shenanigans repeat a similar exchange but it's at a kitty girl stabby ninja con so itachi is there and immediately wonders up afterwards with like. cat ears on.

man: (eyes darting back and forth between the photo and itachi himself, terrified)

itachi: the food options weren't great but i brought you some bread. did the line move?

man: (now looking around to see if anyone ELSE has noticed this)

tori, very blatantly taking his hand: no they just made us rearrange to stop blocking the hallway

itachi: i see

man: (FLEES THE LINE)

thought four: something cute

i don't want tori to be as well known as deidara/itachi in civilian circles, mostly because it'd be funny. but also i don't think she's as flashy as them and a lot of the stuff she does relies on her not being recognizable. and i like the humor of interacting with itachi/deidara stans and cosplayer who just don't recognize her. so there isn't much in the way of tori cosplay/fic/etc even when she's older and has her own Reputation among actual ninja. but okay. imagine. at the ONE con tori can't make there's a lone tori cosplayer. she's sort of haunting the place-- obviously socially awkward and shy. kakashi loses his mind. he summons minato. minato brings kushina. they bother this girl for like hours and low-key make her day even though it's also kind of scary?

kushina has to physically hold tori back from stalking her after she sees the photos. SHE'S JUST GOING TO BREAK INTO HER HOME AND SEE WHAT FANFICTION SHE'S READING NOTHING VIOLENT OR SCARY--

[snootlestheangel]

NikGraves? They’re slowly becoming one of my favorite ships

This is gonna be a lot like the last one just without Price so it'll be interesting to see how that changes the dynamics

Feel free to submit ships or other questions about the ship like "Who takes the hottest shower?"

Who was the one to propose? Graves. He knows when he likes something and isn't going to shy away from keeping it

Who stressed more over wedding planning? Still Nik. I can see Graves being stressed at first but then he mentions it to a few of the Shadows closest to him and boom! He's got like a professional wedding planning team.

Who decorated the house? Graves. Nik wanted to but Graves has so much gifted to him from his Shadows they had no choice. Of course, the only stuff that goes up is stuff Graves likes. He's got class, after all.

Who is more organized? Once again going off the idea that Graves is really good at keeping up appearances of being organized, but it's Nik that's keeping track of stuff. They make an incredibly well-functioning duo which scares people. Truly a power couple

Who suggested kids first? Still Nik as a genuine topic. Graves gives in pretty easily, especially when they find the cutest little girl and take her in. Now, all I'm picturing is Graves waltzing into Shadow Base with their little girl just proudly showing her off. Idk why this is a thought I had with this, but Graves calls Nik his "big bear" cause like, duh? And it kinda sticks until they adopt their daughter and then suddenly he's "Papa Bear" and she's little "Pooh Bear". So of course Graves got her a little bear onesie complete with ears on the hood. And she's running around on the base, and the Shadows are all 'screaming' "There's a bear loose!" and it takes a bold Moose to rein the terrible monster in *I am not sorry, Mike :D* Another super cute idea relating to NikGraves and their toddler: Graves, holding her up like Simba in that one scene: BEHOLD, A CHILD! *cheers and screaming from the Shadows. There are some of them crying* *Graves could not be happier*

Who's the cuddler? Nik is still the cuddlier one. Graves gets dogpiled a lot during the day, but poor Nik has no one to cuddle "except for you, lyubov ;)"

Big spoon/little spoon? They interchange a lot, but Graves does his best to be a big spoon, even if he secretly melts when Nik just wraps around him from behind.

Favorite non-sexual activity? Horse back riding. I dunno I just see them doing that for some reason. They continue going to the same place after adopting 'Pooh Bear' because there's a special program for young families (ie families with small children) and she's just giggling madly while riding the cutest pony. (This idea has possessed me. This is your fault, @mike-like-t-scream all yours! We're just trading brainworms at this point, aren't we? First it was you with Moose, then me with the fucking YouTuber AU, and then you with Graves, and now me with NikGraves and their toddler daughter)

Who cooks? Graves. He knows how to feed his man. Mostly cause his Southern ass would drop dead if the love of his life hadn't eaten properly all day

Who comes home drunk at 3am? Nik on the rare occasion, but if there was a party with the Shadows, it's Graves or one time it was both.

Who kills the spiders? Nik, but he's under watch. I genuinely feel like Graves is the type of mf-er to have been like "Oh, yeah, guys I got this" during his recruit days, only for him to have been bitten and break out into a horrendous allergic reaction. Nik and Graves both don't to risk him having another allergic reaction like that

Who falls asleep first? Even though Nik is a pretty chilled out, sleepy looking kind of guy, he's genuinely so bad about sleeping. Look at that man and tells me he gets the recommended amount of sleep at night, I fucking dare you. SO therefore, Graves always passes out the second he hits the mattress. He's either 100 or 0, no in between.

A head-canon? Graves actually has a few siblings, and he's still relatively close to his family. Close as in he enjoys visiting on the holidays and for special occasions but other than that, they don't really talk much. Not for bad reasons, just more like he and his siblings all grew up and have lives of their own now. His family members were not fans of Nik, at first. Especially Graves's parents. Hell, this guy's probably a good ten years older than Graves if I had to guess, and which means Graves's parents are about the same age distance apart, assuming they were in their twenty's when they had Phil. It took a while for them to all warm up to Nik, which he probably expected, but they were never outright mean to either Nik or Phil. His mom definitely voiced her concerns, and his dad definitely threatened Nik (to which Nik treated it with such seriousness and he like shook Graves Sr.'s hand with a grim "With my life, I will protect him" to which Graves Sr. is like "oh yeah, this dude's chill!"). ALSO Graves is definitely a middle child. He gives off such strong feral middle child vibes to me, I just... He's the middle child, I promise.

Do they have any rituals? Graves's rituals for safety, fun, and winning during the Shadow Olympics and Nik's stretches for safe flying.

Who has the most patience? Nik, obviously. This actually concerns his parents-in-law cause let's be honest, the Graves family is probably a bit messy and they all have pretty short tempers with each other. Meanwhile Nik's just chilling, he's vibing with the old family dog while his husband and brother-in-law are wrestling over the last burger, as if they both aren't in their forties.

Gif that sums up the relationship:

*is still sick* Hehe cats

[whoblewboobear]

Hey sorry if this is weird to say n I know the tags you left on my post the other day when I was joking abt like. How all roads for Jace lead back to Porter like I know they’re old tags and I meant to reply sooner but I really liked what u had to say esp the part at the end I guess abt like. Is Jace returning to Porter even when we try to give him something new tragic or is he glad he got to experience new life with other people who also got to experience new life through essentially the act of creation. I just thought that was a beautiful sentiment. Like I joke about us being in the Zarajace trenches but I love her so much and i get she’s a minor character but it really does make me sad that she’s never seen as a character whose interiority is worth taken seriously. (I literally checked to see if i was crazy and like for example on ao3 she’s only in like 10 works and one is mine two are yours! and the others are like misc Zaraporterjace or sb content n offhand mentions.) I love her so much. Maybe this is silly but even as ‘always a duo’ can be so personal there is something to like. Imbuing a constellation of people including Zara that also get second rich life when we write abt our little blonde guy that we put in Situations :’)

Anyway keep fighting the good zarajace fight ily we’re stronger together! 💪

It's not weird at all! I got so in the weeds with my tags on your post bc Just the idea that maybe we all doomed Jace by tying him back to porter makes me sad but then there's duality to it of, hey he got agency and maybe he's happy too. They started in such a dark place because of the implications within canon but like- the power that creation holds is so special. In the show, Zara had a lot more to work with and I remember being a little scared to write her because it felt so daunting. She already had agency and personality that felt so clear. Like I look at her and I want to be truthful to the seeds that were planted with how she's portrayed. But it really is that same internal debate of did we doom her and take away some of that agency by tying her to Jace? Or is she happy?

ngl I have both you and @italicized-oh to thank for putting the ZaraJace brainworms in my head bc I- wow. Just like- I came into this a starbreaker girlie and fell ass backwards into ZaraJace best friends to QPR to Lavender Marriage pipeline and I think through that, through Jace and through creation Zara is happy. Plus I love that her paramour is still acknowledge a lot of the time. She has such a deep love for them outside of all the Jace and Porter shenanigans. Maybe when the lens isnt focused on her, she's having a full life in her own right. I like to think that she's fulfilled and she's happy. But goddamn I would love to see and maybe even write some Zara charater studies bc as a vampire loving whore, I'm in love with awe of her 😭

Thank you for such a lovely message~ and godspeed in the ZaraJace trenches bc we're gonna need it lmaooo

[nalpurex]

i got souyo brainworms again and i gotta share some thoughts i have

this ones a long one so ill put a 'keep reading' thing here just in case yall dont wanna scroll past a wall of text

basically some headcanons about a healthy mix of chad narukami and normal yu, injecting loads of gap moe into this guy

(and it eventually devolves into some weird semi-story because my brains really spiralling here)

okok so, hear me out, chad narukami isnt that bad as an idea...? maybe as a more calm iteration, just another layer to yu

in the p4 manga, we get to see some of yu's backstory. (its been a while since ive read it so i might get some details wrong but) his parents are very busy people, always working and moving around, so yu's always moving around with them

because of this, hes a very independent but also lonely kid. poor guy doesnt talk much with his own mom and dad, and he never really have a good enough chance to form lasting friendships

so when he moves to inaba and starts making friends there, hes like 'oh i really want to keep these guys around...' so he starts putting up a bit of a persona (hah), some cool, unfazed guy that everyone can rely on thinking thats what people might like more. to his credit, it works pretty well, but its a bit stifling for yu himself. hes never had this many friends though, so he'll keep it up

we all know yosuke admires him quite a fair bit as is, just as a dependable friend and a strong leader. he looks up to yu in these aspects, thinking hes basically the perfect guy. (and lets never unpack that thought.) talented, charming, 'gets all the ladies', that kind of stuff

at some point its just the two of them, maybe walking home from school or something, yu gets pretty comfortable and his facade slips a little. maybe he says something completely silly, or heavens forbid theres a stray cat along the road! ("awww look at the little guy, cmeree, pspsps- oh- ahem- uh, its pretty cute...") it surprises yosuke quite a bit. he's thinking about it a lot as they part ways, it was... definitely a new side to his partner, but its also not a bad thing...

after that, yosuke starts noticing more small things about yu. whenever he invites anyone to share his lunch, its always something they like. whenever the IT are talking, he makes sure no one feels left out. he likes cats, a lot more than hes willing to show, and he loves nanako a whole lot too. his partner's... a bit of a softie under that calm and collected vibe, isnt he?

(alternatively, it'd be really funny if the entire IT knew? like "yeah, hes got a straight face all the time and sparkles fly around him whenever he strikes a pose, but hes got a dedicated schedule for hanging out with us and hes always asking when we're free. hes a big puppy, really.")

anyways, yosuke tries to encourage him to show more of this other side of him. stuff like "c'mon, we'll think you're cool either way!" and yu at first is a little hesitant, so yosuke suggests he just try it out with him

he feels some pride about it, because hes the first to learn about this side of yu! his partner trusts him the most, hes the most comfortable around him! (whats this strange other feeling? hm. dont like that.)

yu takes a little more time with the others, but theyre very welcoming about it nonetheless. specifically, they find it very charming! (making cute shapes in your bento? sewing cute stuffed toys with kanji? playing with literally every single stray cat you lay your eyes on? hell yeag.)

of course the facade doesnt completely shatter, because some parts of it are still true to yu. its just that he'll now crack the dumbest joke youve heard in your life with the same old straight face

(aaand now to derail for the sappy stuff huhuhu)

because yosuke's usually the first to be exposed to whatever new shenanigans yu's up to, eventually he starts getting some... weirder things. he brings some of it up to the other IT members and he looks insane, like:

"what? he hasnt been giving you guys origami?"

"why would he? i mean itd be cool, but thats just his part-time job isnt it? hes probably sick of paper cranes!"

"cranes... haha, yeah..." (as he thinks about the row of stupid paper animals sitting on his windowsill)

yu over time starts getting real sweet with yosuke, and he kind of gets the feeling he should just... keep this to himself...? especially when he doesnt see him acting this way with anyone else, and a small part of him wants to keep it to himself. all of this, just for him.

but that would be kind of gay, wouldnt it? hes not gay, is he...? he gets pretty happy whenever yu smiles at him, whenever he does something for him, but its just because he appreciates him as his partner... right?

eventually it all comes to a head when yu invites him to that... that spot high up in inaba. (ykno the one, its got the railing and shit.)

yosuke's climbing the hill, wondering whats yu gonna tell him, and at the top he sees him already waiting there as the sun's about to set on a nice breezy day

he kinda jokes a bit about it, like "damn did you ask me to come here now for the atmosphere?" but yu's strangely quiet

so they kinda just stand in a bit of an awkward silence before yu clears his throat... and confesses to yosuke.

...

they just. stare at each other for a bit. yosuke's at a loss, heat slowly rising in his cheeks, because what the hell?

and then yu explodes into a flustered mess, bumbling about "hey yeah man you dont have to accept if you dont wanna, i was just saying things yknow? you dont really have to-"

yosuke cuts him off, sighing a little. he tells him its okay, hes kinda had a feeling he felt the same way but he wasnt ready yet... and now his partner's confessing to his face, he cant really put it off anymore, can he?

("by the way, did you plan this? like, the timing and everything?"

"i... had a hard enough time saying 'i like you' with a straight face as it was, i kind of had to..."

"... ah.")

[pragnificent]

Tagged by @tina-mairin-goldstein! Tagging whoever else wants to play.

1.How many fics do you have on AO3?

78.

2. What's your total word count on AO3?

934,933. Wow, maybe I can break a million this year....

3. What fandoms do you write for?

Just HANNIBAL right now (and for like the last seven years or so). Been vaguely thinking about picking up a second but nothing has caught my interest strongly enough.

4. What are your top five fics by kudos?

Attachment - 7,592

The Fisherman and the Beast from the Sea - 4,565

Sashimi - 2,807

Hungry Ghost - 1,585

Identically Different - 1,382 <- This is my best series and yall should give it a shot <3

5. Do you respond to comments?

I try to, and I enjoy doing so, but sometimes the brainworms win and I don't get stuff done even when I really want to.

6. What is the fic you wrote with the angstiest ending?

Breathless

I don't love this story, but "Hannibal is effectively braindead after the fall, but Will keeps caring for the body and feels that Hannibal is there with him, up until the body dies and Will turns himself in because there isn't any point anymore" probably counts as the most angsty? If you are in the market for a "Hannibal receives a brain injury and he, along with everyone else around him, has to cope with that" story Tina's For Remembrance (Holes in the Floor of the Mind) is a much better pick. And as I continue to think about it, Means of Influence has a pretty angsty ending.

7. What is the fic you wrote with the happiest ending?

Most of my stories have slightly bittersweet but still mostly happy endings. Part of the thing about that is I think it's really hard to envision a situation where Will is like 100% Happy Happy, his own mind hates him too much and every little scrap of happiness needs to be fought for and then vigilantly guarded. But I put both him and Hannibal through so much that I always want them to be as close to content as they each can be.

8. Do you get hate on fics?

I have gotten two flavors of Fic Hate. 1.) People calling the five year old kid OC in ATTACHMENT slurs like "r*tard" and saying "he belongs in jail" and etc.

Every time Hannibal or Will fuck someone who isn't each other at least one person decides to Yell At Me.

I think I've gotten the old "you didn't tag for bottom Hannibal!!" nonsense once or twice too, but who hasn't?

9. Do you write smut? If so, what kind?

A little. I actually started Hannishark bc I was really intimidated by sex scenes and wanted to see if I could pull off a short monsterfucker story. I feel like I've gotten better at writing these but am generally more comfortable leaving them sparce on anatomical details and big on feelings/conversations.

10. Do you write crossovers? If so, what's the craziest one?

I've got a WRONG TURN crossover series that I'm very proud of here: Bear Mountain Road AU. You don't need to have seen any of the movies to read it, or anything, the movies' premise of "a clan of inbred mountain cannibals waylays travelers" is really just an excuse to put Hannibal (and Will and D, as child members of the cannibal family) In Situations. If I counts as a cross over, I've got a universe swap between the novels and NBC HANNIBAL here: Shiloh

I also have a vague idea for a SAW / HANNIBAL crossover but I've been sitting on that for so long, who knows if it'll ever happen?

11. Have you ever had a fic stolen?

Not so far as I know.

12. Have you ever had a fic translated?

Yes, several times.

13. Have you ever co-written a fic?

Yep, a couple of times.

14. What's your all time favorite ship?

Hannigram and Reba/D (guys we need a fuckin ship name).

15. What are your writing strengths?

Character, emotions, dialogue.

16. What are your writing weaknesses?

Sex scenes, pacing.

17. Thoughts writing dialogue in another language?

Fine by me, tho I only think I've done it one or twice.

18. First fandom you wrote for?

FARSCAPE.

19. Favorite fic you've written?

Identically Different AU !!!! This it the best thing I've ever written and probably the best thing I will ever write.

[fixaidea]

And that was Beyond Evil and now I have brainworms.

Han Kihwan, the Lily Weatherwax-ass character that you are.* You spent your whole life trying to mould the world around you into your idea of perfection, not giving a shit about all the pieces that broke and fell off.

All that and you weren't even having FUN.

*I promise I read things beside Discworld, but in my defense this show was really heavy on the themes of Justice, Evil beginning with treating people like things and the question of Who's watching the watchmen?

Besides, you can't give me Han Joowon and expect me not to be reminded of the guy who 1. arrested a dragon 2. arrested the current ruler of his city and 3. arrested a whole ass army for disturbing the peace.

[gemharvest]

Hiii local pico fanboy here to request him for the character thing :))

YES!!! PICO BRAINWORM, ACTIVATE !!!!!!!!!

favorite thing about them: TBHHHH idk. I like his silly maybe. His whimsy. I angst his ass so much but he's such a goober in canon. I want to put him in a hamster ball and watch him run around and I genuinely think he'd enjoy it.

least favorite thing about them: I feel like every time I mention him I run the risk of someone making a weird assumption about me. Pico toxoplasmosis curse: will someone yell at me because my fave, my little scrunkly, my blorbo, originates from the Newgrounds school shooting satire game. The answer is to tell myself not to worry about it and I go "Okay💗 Yay💗" and continue brainrotting.

favorite line: What does this guy even say fuuuuufhfhuhhkkckkk. Guy who mostly thinks about FNF and has barely touched Pico's School stuff. Unfortunately might have to pass on this for now sorry. You can give me a bad grade on being a Pico fan LMAO. /j

brOTP: I'm going to be so fr I am obsessed with the dynamic you can get between him and Nene. I am studying them like bugs. Tho of course Pico & Darnell's friendship is so good. Newgrounds trio you are so fucked up I love you guys.

OTP: Hey guys do any of you know about this niche little thing called the RGB polyshioGFOKMKFGMLKM>. Very obvious answer but yeah. OT3. As of late I've been having so much fun with romantic PicoGF. PicoBF gets a lot of focus and it has from me too, but there's such a fun dynamic you can get from GF and Pico. They can have something fun even if you take a platonic/ QPR angle, tho I said already that I like exploring a romantic dynamic between them.

nOTP: I don't knowwwwwwwww. I don't think I have a nOTP for him. Yes, even considering Cass (huge-ass disclaimer that I do not ship them, but I can't see myself caring if others do). Sorry LOL.

random headcanon: I think if you asked him if he'd jump off a cliff he'd say no, of course not wtf, but then if you asked him if he'd jump off a cliff because Boyfriend did he'd take a suspicious amount of time to answer. Like that one Dan Vs. bit. Idk I'm trying to think of something I haven't mentioned before. Secondary answer that's more of a headcanon is that I really do think this guy would be a non-traditional pet owner. Like snakes/ tarantulas that kinda thing. I think he'd like rats/ other rodents too but the idea of him handling a snake makes me bounce off the walls.

unpopular opinion: The curse I bare is that I barely go to wider fandom spaces I don't know what a popular opinion for him right now would be. Idk I think people sometimes write him to be way tougher than he'd be. Like, OK I'm tired idk how to fully explain it but in my head this guy's a softie once he lets you past his exterior. He's kind at heart even if he has his whole Thing going on and I've seen takes that ignore that/ aren't aware of it, and I feel like that's the surface-level read people might get off of him. Might be able to put this better when I have a rested mind LMAO.

song i associate with them: *cracks my knuckles and opens my playlist for him* Oh I was built for this. Two because I an never content picking just one, my playlist for him would be massive if I remembered to add songs regularly LMAO.

favorite picture of them:

I feel like this is a very funny choice for "favorite image" but it's specifically this bit in his character sheet. "Kind like how cats stretch out look longer" you don't say... Guy who isn't even beating the kitty allegations in his fucking character sheet. My non-funny answer would probably be his game-over sprite for when you lose to one of the spray paint cans:

>> original ask game here; feel free to send more, I don't bite <<

[anachronistic-falsehood]

SO. ON THE TOPIC OF LOSS OF AUTONOMY. i am having the analysis brainworms now i hope u dont mind me going off in ur inbox. hi :]

there is something to be said about how vash's name is used against him constantly. that loss of who he even is as a person. i think about this so much. his name, his very identity is taken away from him. just the mere mention of the name vash the stampede is enough to send an ENTIRE town into a panic. it happens so much and its DEVASTATING to me. hes been labelled a monster across the entire world, and people who stick by his side after hearing his name are few and far between. theres been so much fear tacked onto his name, so much so that OTHER outlaws have used it on multiple occasions to make themselves more powerful. using his name to commit crimes that the real vash would be horrified to even consider. power in names and all that.

vash even. leans into it himself at a certain point. in order to protect the people of augusta he runs through the city shooting bullets into the air and solidifying his image of a deranged killer in the pursuit of. saving everyone. the only way theyll listen to him is if they think hes going to kill them all. if theyre afraid of him. theres also the part in hang fire (? i think its that one) where hes walking through the halls of the sand steamer singing about killing people in order to scare the bandits into not hurting the hostages.

and then you think about. eriks. how lina and her grandma took him in and accepted them as part of his family. how the town around them accepted him only because they had no idea who he actually was. he was a good guy... up until they learned he was vash. and then we get the conversation between the two men in the bar talking about how they should chase him out of town, despite living around him and knowinf him and seeing how good he is for . two years.

but lina and her grandma still accept him after that. theyre one of the only people besides milly/meryl/wolfwood who genuinely love and care abt him despite his name. they still want to keep him safe, grandma asks wolfwood to protect him and keep him out of trouble, even after learning hes the legendary outlaw gunman. because shes seen the true vash ans doesnt let the name scare her.

aughhh im rambling now i probably should have made this into my own post but this makes me SO fuckign crazy dude . give me ur thoughts id love to hear them.

I. YEAH. YEAH. OH MY GOD. Like. nothing is his own anymore. His name is used against him, his face is plastered on wanted posters. There is nothing about himself that he can truly call his. Not even his Plant powers! Because those are used against him time and time again by Knives in EVERY ADAPTATION!!!!

Like. Vash is no longer the name of a kid who once argued with his brother and laughed with his mother and celebrated his birthday and rolled around in grassy fields. It's the name of an outlaw who will kill at the drop of a hat. It's the name of an out-of-control human natural disaster who's leveled cities. If he doesn't even have his name, then what part of himself is really himself anymore?

AND THAT'S WHY I LOVE ERIKS! He finally has something of his own! He's got a name that attached to no one, and a life where he can settle down and stay out of the public eye. He finally has something that is truly his. And no one lets him keep that except for Lina and her grandma.

This guy really has no control over his own life doesn't he!!! He's a passive character in the story of his own life!!! He has nothing of his own, no identity past "humanoid typhoon" because everything about his identity has been stripped from him and morphed into something he's not. He has no say in anything in his life, not even who he is as a person, AND IT DRIVES ME BONKERS N FUCKING YONKERS!!!!