#this got a little cracky

[starry-bi-sky]

finally giving fem danyal her own au and fulfilling my 'danny is an animal whisperer' agenda at the same time: mother of monsters danyal 2.0

i say "2.0" because TECHNICALLY 'mother of monsters danyal' is an au I made back in June for Dark fem!Danyal (who I promptly named Layal). However, I haven't posted much for her yet, and I like the "mother of monsters" premise too much to leave it only to Layal. Plus Danyal in that au was going to become the mother of monsters anyway, just with significantly less world domination and mass extinction.

'Animal whisperer' Danny has been something I've been thinking about since my latest DP 'wolfpack au' post and it's! So fun to think about, and who no better to assign the idea to than Danyal Al Ghul? Who comes from a family infamously known for their love of animals and nature?

Fem Danyal is just purely self-indulgent. *gestures wildly at her* i just lomvb,,, her,,,, I've only really mentioned her in context of the 'Things in Threes' au/my first Danyal al Ghul au with the facial scar, but she's!!! I love her. She deserves her own au <33

So kill three birds with one stone! Make a post about it.

Anyways, Danny has a large lair. Similar to cult leader danyal, her lair is a giant mountain region resembling nanda parbat with a big temple/palace-like area built into the mountain. It's large, it's overflowing with natural flora, with its own mini-floating islands hovering over some areas, and it's also completely empty.

Danny takes one look at her lair upon first meeting, -- noting that it looked relatively smaller from the outside -- and promptly, with the elegance of an Al Ghul, goes "What the hell??" Because yes, while she does enjoy her own solitude and privacy, this is a bit ridiculous.

For heaven's sake, there's even a massive lake in there! What's she going to do with all this space? Can she make it any smaller? Why is it so big in the first place? This looks borderline like one of the mega-islands!

She finds out later that apparently, the amount of ectoplasm a ghost has can have an effect on the size of their lair. And since she has such a large core, her lair reflects that. Wibbly-wobbly timey-wimey stuff, it's bigger on the inside so it doesn't take up "too much space" on the outside. Don't worry about it too much.

Danyal isn't totally opposed to having such a large lair, she's just... a bit baffled by it. It feels like so much wasted space is all. All this flora and no fauna to enjoy it with. It's practically eerie.

She decorates her temple-palace area, transforming rooms to match her needs as she sees fit. In the center of the inner gardens is a massive tree that she likes to climb, with twisting, winding branches. Sam and Tucker have honorary rooms, even if they can't safely leave the specter speeder for long periods of time, even with proper safety equipment. So does Jazz. Ali (Dani) has one too, but he can actually use that one, and Danny brought him to her lair so he could decorate it himself.

She has a personal garden, but for the most part she lets the flora exist as it is. Too much space to cultivate it en masse anyways.

Skip to a few weeks later, on her next visit to Clockwork. She developed a habit of going to see him semi-regularly just because. She enjoys his wisdom, and he has a lot of stories to tell, and when he's not being the cryptic and esoteric timekeeper, he's a bit goofy.

(pushing my dadwork agenda here,,, i think Danny deserves to go 'hey, Lord Clockwork, do you want me to buy you something' while she's at walmart, only to receive a singular glowing sticky note that says 'cucumber gatorade'.)

(She insists on referring to him with his proper titles even for the most mundane of things because it's proper, but Clockwork sees a future where she eventually calls him "Cee" and by all things in existence is he determined to get there. Anyways,,,)

On her next visit to Clockwork, just as she is about to leave, Clockwork stops her and goes; "Ah, I have something for you. Hold out your hands."

Danny does as such, and Clockwork doesn't give out things often, so her curiosity has spiked to the highest levels. He turns away from her for a moment, using his staff to summon whatever it is he needs, and when he turns around.

He drops a fish into her hands. Granted, a fish in a small glass tank. But a fish nonetheless. A small one, roughly about the size of her finger, with a blue-black, eel-shaped body and four sets of glowing eyes. She can see thin, almost translucent, but spiny fins down its back and the start of bioluminescent markings. It's swimming around in circles in its small container.

"Lord Clockwork." Danyal says all too calmly.

"Yes, Danyal?"

"What is this?"

"That is an adolescent leviathan, Danyal." She’s transfixed onto the tank, but she doesn’t need to see Clockwork’s face to hear the smile he’s stifling.

The myriad of emotions that runs through her all at once threatens to overwhelm her, and she can’t tell if the feelings are negative or positive. So she carefully closes her eyes to breathe in through her nose.

“Clockwork.”

“Ah, I see you’ve dropped formalities.”

She ignores that.

“Why have you given me an adolescent leviathan?”

She's expecting the trickster to look amused when she opens her eyes. Instead, he just looks endeared. "I know you're fond of animals," he says, "and you always look amazed when you come across an animal of the realms. So I thought you might enjoy taking care of the young beast, it's mother is dead so it has no one to care for it."

Oh.

"But, if you don't like it," Clockwork's hands reach out for the tank, "I can simply take it back--"

Danyal shifts the tank out from his reach and hugs it possessively. "I never said that. How do I care for it?"

And so clockwork gives her a list, and when Danyal returns to her lair, she sets up a large tank in her room for the leviathan to swim in -- it's much too small for the lake right now, she thinks. She'll feel better if it's somewhere she can find it. She names him Suhā.

Suhā grows quickly, and by the end of the mortal month she transforms one of the rooms into a large pond for him to swim around in. He's a very loyal beast, recognizing her as it's mother of some kind. Danyal takes great care ensuring that her beastie gets quality care, and Suhā swims to the surface to see her when he senses her in the room.

It spirals from there. Somehow, Pandora catches wind that Clockwork gave her a leviathan, and so the next time Danyal visits the Greater Athens, she gives her a baby chimera. It's eyes are still sealed shut, Danyal can't bring herself to say no. She names the little beastie Firas.

Frostbite hears about it too, and not to be outdone, gives her an animal she's never even heard of. Infinite-realms born, apparently. A fox-like creature with two small horns like an impala, four eyes, and tall legs. The name isn't something she's quite sure how to write down, and she's positive that her friends won't be able to comprehend it. She names her Eira.

Getting the three of them used to each other was... interesting. Suhā tried to eat Firas when Danyal first introduced the two, and they've hated each other ever since. Firas and Eira are seemingly getting along. Her island already feels full enough with the three of them on it.

Of course, that's not the end of it. With her luck, she begins stumbling across other monsters. Realms-borne or otherwise. An injured hydra in the Grecian islands that, through lots of trial and error, Danyal is able to rehabilitate and heal. It routinely comes to visit her afterwards.

A griffin with a broken wing that she moves permanently to the island that likes to keep to itself, but tends to come down when she's near. It gets along best with Firas.

A panther-like monster from the Shades Woods that had six legs and three tails, with ends that reminded her of a venus flytrap. It stuck around the heavy foliage and she can only make out where it was when she saw its golden eyes reflect.

She befriends a young indrik with its leg injured, and much like the hydra it follows her back to her island, and stays there in the mountains. It comes out when she's alone, much like her other beasts.

She receives two more leviathan -- one from clockwork, and one she finds herself while exploring the deeper and darker recesses of the Ghost Zone. It was huddled against the carcass of its mother, and she managed to befriend and get close enough to it to bring it back to her island. Suhā is fully grown by then, with a head bigger than Danyal herself and he still likes to stick her head out of the water for nuzzles when she's near.

He's not very happy with his new siblings, but he's not trying to eat them when she's not looking. So she calls it a win in her book.

And it's not just large beasts either; smaller animals begin popping up when she's not looking. Bird-like creatures and small mammals, and she swears she saw a doe (or something resembling a doe) grazing in the forest while she was walking by.

She takes back with her a lone snake egg once, and it grows so big it wraps around her island and sleeps with its massive head on the mountain beside the temple, like some smaller breed of Jörmungandr.

And on and on it goes. Some of the beasts she comes across never step foot onto her island, some of them follow her back, while others she has to carry back. Not all of the ones that follow her stay, and Danny rehabilitates the injured and releases them when they're fully healed.

It's hectic, and busy, and frankly she loves it. Some of her rehabilitated beasts return to visit her, or to have their children somewhere on the island, or whatever it is they need to do.

She becomes a bit infamous for it. She goes to visit Dorathea once, and as she's walking through the streets she can hear some of the denizens whispering while she walks past.

"Is that her?"

"Her highness' friend? Yes--"

"--that's the one--"

"--Mother of monsters--"

Danny's not sure how to feel about that.

Although, she can't say she's opposed.

Danyal Al Ghul, Mother of monsters, raiser of beasts. It has a nice ring to it.

[fireflysugarpie]

Dumbass thought but shizun (sy) x Tony the tiger

hmm, this raises some interesting questions that I need answered anon.

why are Shen Yuan and Tony the Tiger theoretically in the same universe in order to pursue a romantic relationship with one another? what would draw them to each other? if Shen Yuan is a furry in this scenario, would that make Tony the Tiger a fleshie?

if this is another transmigration situation, who would Shen Yuan transmigrate into? An unsuspecting extra or actor that appeared in the commercials? The bowl of cereal? or would he also be a weirdly hot anthropomorphic animal?

maybe in this universe, Shen Yuan dies while furiously cranking it to rule34 Kelloggs cereal ads and transmigrates into a furry's paradise. if so, even though I love the depiction of crane!shen yuan, I think I would have to go with the fandom depiction of a housecat lmao

then the ship would turn into twink housecat shen yuan x buff hunk tiger tony. both would be mammals and roughly the same species, so I think it could work out.

"but Firefly!" you may say, "shen yuan is attracted to pathetic pretty men! he wouldn't go for the beef cake, successful actor, and married father of two!" (and yes, Tony the Tiger is canonically married with two children, I had to deep dive into the lore of this fictional hunky tiger in order to make this post just for you anon ♡)

but my solution to this is to make Tony the Tiger go through a messy divorce. think about it, a divorcee single father trying his best to raise his kids, fighting the court system to get full custody, whilst juggling his responsibilities as a third generation actor and as an athletics coach? dude would have to have a mental breakdown eventually

maybe during a bad set of takes for a new commercial, Tony would be hiding away in a supply closet crying, the pressures of his home and professional life becoming too much for him to bare at the moment, when an extra also into the same supply to also have a mental breakdown.

that extra being shen yuan obvi, probably freaking out over being a furry version of himself. but of course, he has to help this poor guy before he can deal with his own shit! he isn't heartless after all!

his eyes would be so kind, his voice so soft, and his ass so fat that Tony the Tiger would be all over that catboy

and shen yuan would come to the slow realization that this attractive tiger man was actually the living breathing version of the 2d animated tiger he used to jerk off to hahahahaha

[domoz]

Or, alternate funny version to the previous: any combination of Uchiha watching Tobirama fight and discussing their observations (gossiping/oogling shamelessly), after peace exists and they SHOULD technically probably help him, but... Tobirama can clearly handle it, no need to get in his way

I once read that a drabble is 200 words or less. I will never beat those allegations.

The ability to share memories with the sharingan really isn't meant to be used this way, but that's never actually stopped anyone.

"I swear to you," Says Madara with a snicker, "He slapped himself in the face with a water whip. Acted like it never happened, but I saw it."

The scene is a bit more endearing than that, when Madara shows it. Tobirama is sparring with his students and one of them can't quite dodge in time. That jutsu can break skin and cut through muscle if it hits right, but rather than hurt one of his students that badly, Tobirama jerks it back. He breaking the whip's momentum but loses a good portion of control and,  indeed, slaps himself in the fact with it. He looks rather akin to a wet cat.

Madara and Izuna both break out into another fit of laughter, but Hikaku just shakes his head fondly.

"I've seen him do that on purpose, actually." He says after the laughter has died down a bit. It's not exactly the same -- the memory he calls up had been recorded on accident. It had been in those early days of peace, when seeing Tobirama move water about had made him call up the sharingan on instinct, back when they'd be so concerned that he'd break peace that he wasn't allowed to go off on missions alone.

I'd been rather rote mission -- dealing with bandits who had thought they could take advanced of the disorganization of a new village. It had had been hot, the summer temperatures soaring high and uncomfortable, and they'd both been sweat soaked and sticky by the end of it.

"Excuse me" Tobirama had said the moment he'd cause sight of a source of water. He'd let himself jump in ankle deep instead of standing on top, raised an arm, and proceeded to dump an honestly excessive amount of water over himself. Of course, his mastery over water let him pull water out of his clothes until he was just the right amount of damp without any effort-- Hikaku had been and still is jealous over it -- and even back then, eyes lingered on where wet clothes stuck to well-defined muscle.

Thankfully no one comments. The sharingan's tendency to show the exactly what was seen means they've all shared unintentionally embarrassing moments. Plus, Hikaku knows he's not the only one who's done that exact thing.

"Oh, sensei will do that for us, if we ask!" Chimes in Kagami, thankfully too young and oblivious to understand why his cousins are giving Hikaku the side eye. He launches into a memory of his team begging and pleading to be allowed to train on the water on another hot day. His sensei had crossed his arms, unimpressed, and said he knew that the lot of them had all mastered water walking already…

…But that if the lot of them managed to prove they could do their D-rank mission without complaining, he would think of a way to cool them all off. In Kagami's young memory, the cool mist Tobirama had raised from the pond of the garden they'd been weeding had been the most refreshing thing he'd ever felt.

"…He's too soft on you." Madara says, without any real heat.

"He's something." Izuna responds dryly. "Sometimes I forget, none of you have ever seen what it's like when he really wants to get something done."

Without warning, Izuna calls up the memory of a fight. No… A spar, but a bloodthirsty one. Probably one of the first ones they'd had since they were allowed to again, after peace was called. A mixture of pent up frustration and the fact that they were no longer supposed to kill each other had both of them showing off -- Izuna was prone to do it, regardless, but this was the first time he'd seen Tobirama opt for techniques that were more flashy than practical. A water dragon with mutliple heads split apart into multiple, chasing Izuna through the trees, each one eating one of the multi-fireballs Izuna hurls out to counter them.

Tobirama did not hesitate, leaping out from the steam and twisting his fingers. The droplets of water in the air shimmered and twisted until everything was an indistinct haze.

Not that it stops a sharingan. But something about the scene -- the way the light hit the mist, haloing Tobirama with a sort of rainbow -- or maybe the way he's smirking -- makes Izuna pause.

Oh, he thinks.

Oh, thinks everyone else.

[sherlock-is-ace]

just finished the end of time. 10's "i don't want to go" will always be sad, but i can't help but dismiss it, bitch you'll be back... multiple times. They're never getting rid of you kdfjghdfg

[gyokujyn]

There was a war on. You take comfort where you can get it.

Marvel cinematic world and actors being indefensible aside, are we all just going to sit here and act like their swinger dynamics aren't happening

If you put these five souls on a graph and started red lining who's in a relationship with what and who's broke up with who and who had homoerotic relationships with who's dads you'd Pass Out

[tossawary]

Cracky SVSSS Canon Divergence AU: Shang Qinghua (Airplane Bro) gets it into his head to try and "fix" Qijiu's relationship in order to 1) make his own work life easier and also 2) hopefully avert the ruthless destruction of Cang Qiong Mountain Sect by distracting Shen Qingqiu away from being a real piece of shit whenever the protagonist finally shows up. (Luo Binghe isn't here yet.)

Unfortunately, he gets this idea because he accidentally slept with Yue Qingyuan. It was during a late budgetary meeting. They'd both been slightly drunk. Yue Qingyuan had been sad and Shang Qinghua had been sad AND horny. It was a "bro helping another bro out" kind of thing! Shang Qinghua still can't really believe it happened. But it can't happen again! Bad idea!

Shang Qinghua encounters Shen Qingqiu in a brothel with half a plan on how to start unraveling that much damage, only... uh... Well, Shen Qingqiu got the wrong idea about what Shang Qinghua wanted from him, and Shang Qinghua's favorite type unfortunately happens to be "scary and mean and very pretty". Fuck! He accidentally slept with Shen Qingqiu too!

So, okay, back to Yue Qingyuan, who will definitely be the more reasonable person to talk to, because he hides all of his massive trauma like a polite person! Oh, shit, Yue Qingyuan is pretty hot, isn't he? And is coming on to Shang Qinghua again for a casual fuck... and whoops, the bad idea happened again! Fuck! When Shang Qinghua tries to have a productive conversation afterwards, Yue Qingyuan even confides in him a little. Yeah, bro, it IS super obvious that you're totally hung up on Shen Qingqiu, and oh, shit, you are NEVER going to make the first move, are you?

Okay, maybe "fixing" these guys is just not possible. Mistakes! He has made them! Shang Qinghua is just going to stay out of things moving forward. He's going to avoid them now! Oh, shit, Shen Qingqiu wants to know why Shang Qinghua was staring at him in that meeting and is slamming against a wall and- uh. Oh, wow. That's hot.

"Both of them?" Mobei-Jun says later, too bemused to be jealous. (Moshang aren't a thing yet. Maybe not ever a thing like that in this AU. Demons also have different societal conventions even so.)

"BOTH OF THEM!" Shang Qinghua wails, lying facedown on the floor of his house. He doesn't know why he's actually venting to Mobei-Jun, but he has NO ONE ELSE. He's getting SO well laid, sure, but the constant nagging feeling that he's going to get maimed this way is really putting a damper on the sex. Qijiu really, truly, honestly do NOT know that he's sleeping with both of them. "What is wrong with these people?! Why is their taste so bad? I made everything so much worse..."

"Stop fucking them then," Mobei-Jun suggests, as helpful as ever, which is not helpful at all. Mobei-Jun has never been helpful to anyone in his life. When he's not mildly annoyed by it, he thinks this shit is hysterically funny.

[sleepy-writes-stuff]

DP X DC PROMPT #28

(#) = Notes at the end of post

✦

Chartreuse

Due to the high levels of ambient ectoplasm, all the citizens of Amity Park gained a permanent change in eye color. They don't glow or flare in response to rampant emotions like true ghosts or the halfas though. They're just an unnaturally bright yellow-green.

The thing is, nobody else on Earth has this eye color, and it's never been seen in the human race until the recently graduated Amity Parkers started branching out to other cities to find jobs.

Nobody paid this any mind at first, though. Many just thought the individuals liked strangely colored contacts or it was a trick of the light. It's not until Danny and Tucker are both hired for positions in Wayne Enterprises that questions start popping up.

At first, the other employees thought the two might be related. It could happen, it's not that strange. However, when both of them said they're nowhere near related, just childhood best friends, it left everyone confused. If they aren't related and they aren't wearing colored contacts, then what are the odds of too completely unrelated people having the exact same strange and unseen eye color?

After a while, everyone just stops asking questions. After all, both men are easy to get along with and are excellent at their jobs, so a strange eye color isn't really something to complain about. Their stares were just a bit more intense than most people, and honestly, they've seen stranger things.

It helps that they've started seeing other people with the same eye color popping up in celebrity, sports, and activist circles. (1)

However, It's not until the power goes out during a late meeting/presentation, and Tim Drake accidentally turns on and shines his cell phone light into Tuckers eyes, that he starts seriously digging.

Needless to say, the animal-like green shine of his pupils scared the shit out of him and got him wondering if two of his new employees were part of a previously unknown alien race that'd recently settled on Earth without anyone noticing. When he looks into the middle of nowhere town they came from, this idea is even further cemented when he sees every person he finds a photo of have the exact same shade of chartreuse eyes. Ignoring the ghost rumors and "sightings" as just a strange tourist trap for the strange little town to make extra income, he brings the info he found to the other bats and birds.

They aren't exactly welcomed when they go snooping around Amity Park, unfortunately... (2 & 3)

✦

Now. To make this a bit more cracky, when confronted, do Danny and Tucker just come clean or do they milk the idea of them being aliens for all it's worth? (4) Add in a few strange, but perfectly normal for them, things they do that have people scratching their heads and make the assumption even worse/more irrefutable. This includes the unexplainable eye shine Tim discovered.

✦

(1) Paulina became a supermodel and is coveted for her striking eye color and beautiful complexion. Dash became a coach for a well known college in Metropolis, while Kwan became a fitness trainer and sponsor for health related items that actually work, also partnered with the college Dash coaches at. Sam became a notorious environmental activist and is the enemy of many companys who are determined to turn the world into a toxic wasteland. With the help of Danny's parents, she's found many eco-friendly chemical compounds that dissolve many of the toxic substances damaging ecosystems around the world. Etc, etc.

(2) Ectoplasm exposure has made everyone a bit more territorial over the town, including their protectors. They don't need outside heroes/organizations interfering with their work and don't/won't take kindly to the sudden interest hero organizations gain over them and their strange little town. That hasn't worked out too well with other government sanctioned organizations in the past and they don't want a repeat, thank you.

(3) Maybe Team Phantom even established themselves right around the same time or even before the Justice League was formed and they just flew under the radar until now. Maybe Amity Parkers feel a bit superior due to their seniority in having an excellent team in the know about the supernatural/non-human side of the world/universe? Who knows? You pick! Amity Park has been through a lot by themselves, so it's no shocker if they have an extreme amount of solidarity towards those they call their own.

(3 cont'd) Also! Since Amity Park has become so rich and saturated in ectoplasm over the years, they were eventually annexed/became an outside part of the Ghost Zone. Jack and Maddy are border patrol and any ghosts coming through need a passport now. Amity Park is basically a vacation hub for ghosts? Ghosts can freely roam the streets, they just don't wreak havoc anymore. That'd basically be terrorizing their fellow citizens at this point anyway and that's a no no. That means jail time with Walker. Amity Parkers also aren't afraid anymore and in fact CAN hit back now. This does not stop the Bat Clan and eventually the Justice League from thinking they're a town full of aliens tho. Some are just more human looking than others. Or they've been on Earth and procreating long enough with humans that their hybrid offspring have also started looking more human, is the ongoing conclusion.

(4) The Anti-Ecto Acts are not an issue here! Team Phantom already dismantled and annihilated the GIW years before they even thought of leaving Amity Park on its own. Before graduating highschool even. Yes, Team Phantom is perfectly self-sufficient and able to handle their own problems and have kept the city-wide ghost infestation pretty isolated outside a few events that were handled quickly and with the world none the wiser. So the world is still pretty ignorant of the existence of ghosts/the Ghost Zone. Would Team Phantom and Amity Park prefer to keep it that way though?

[worriedvision]

Ajaw ruins his relationship with you - Kinich

Gender neutral reader, angst. No happy ending here, borderline crack BC Ajaw is a cracky character let's be honest. Ajaws a little shit here

--

Kinich had, somehow, caught your eye enough for you to successfully land a date with him. One date becomes two, and the third one ends in you inviting him over for a drink. He accepts, and before you know it your home becomes a place for him to call home as well. While Kinich wasn't very emotive, he seemed to smile just a bit around you.

However, the couple affections you would expect from him in a relationship weren't coming. Nothing like kissing or hugging, and for a while you think it's because Kinich was not a touchy person. You also knew he was very busy with his work, which was why the first few times he left and told you not to wait for him you didn't think much. At the time, in fact, you were more attracted to him because he was honest with you.

"Don't wait up." He blankly states, every morning he leaves. If you're lucky, he comes back at night time only to sleep - he doesn't make himself any food or drink from your home.

You got suspicious of him when you were hanging out with Mualani, and she brought up the fact someone called Ajaw wouldn't stop nagging at Kinich. When you ask who Ajaw was, rather if this was his boss, Mualani laughs.

"Ajaw probably thinks so, but they bickering too often to do any work together." Mualani tuts. "Do you never hear Ajaw? That voice is so... Annoying to hear!"

"No...I've never met this Ajaw." You hum out, Mualani gasping.

"Tell me your tricks!"

--

Once you get home from your interaction with your friend, you've had enough time to think. After some long thinking, you come to a decision. You move the stuff that's Kinich's, leaving them by the front door, and add temporary locks in addition to the one your key locks until you can change the lock.

To your surprise, Kinich sounds surprised when he notices his bags out. You refuse to open the door, having more than enough time to waste as you had a day off, and Kinich defeatedly picks up his few belongings before leaving.

--

"Hah! You should see your face!" Ajaw jeers, Mualani and Kinich groaning out at Ajaws harsh words. "Good thing _ wisened up and realised they can do a lot better than some mortal being that can't even get himself a group of companions!"

"Because you always ruin things." Mualani sighs.

"Hey, I can't take credit for this one! I never even once spoke around _!" Ajaw shrugs, putting some sunglasses on.

"I was hoping to finally get to spend some time with them. I've finally got enough cover for a few days." Kinich states, seeming to realise what Ajaw did. "...Mualani, you know how annoying Ajaw is. Do you know if -"

"Oddly enough no! Honestly, I'm jealous. Ajaw doesn't know when to shut up."

"...It seems they do." Kinich massages his temples, Mualani making eye contact with him.

"...Do you think they were suspicious you were seeing Ajaw? Yuck!"

"Hey, I can hear you, ya know?!"

"It makes sense though. They don't know Ajaw isn't even human, and also isn't mortal."

"Hahaha! Oh boy, even I didn't think keeping my mouth shut around your potential love interests would give this benefit!" Ajaw cackles, seeing Kinich's hand flying towards him. "Hey, what are - AHH!"

--

You keep getting asked if Kinich is single, each time you saying he wasn't seeing you anymore before they seem excited to pursue a taken man. It's quite concerning, really, you think theres little dignity in being the other person in the relationship.

Kinich tried to talk to you, but each time you saw him you'd make an excuse for being too busy before hearing some weird child cackling and screaming in retaliation to someone reacting to them. As much as his hurt expression spoke to you, you still knew in your mind that Kinich was in a relationship.

Even if he wasn't, you would know in your mind that you were the second choice.

[scekrex]

Im not sure if counts as an ask but. But hear me out.

Adam X Male Reader.

But...

Adam is at meeting but forgot to take the ribs his newly wedded husband (AKA, The Reader) made for him. So being the good husband he is, Reader goes to the place where the meeting is being held at. To give Adam the Ribs.

He arrives and busts down the door. Because he got no fucks to give besides giving Adam the ribs.

When he does, he saw Adam looking back at him with a shocked expression along side Lute who's face mirrored Adam's. A usual site besides the shock.

But what surprises him is that on the side of the room is Lucifer and Lilith (perhaps Eve too if you want) But Reader quickly gets over it, he came here on mission after all.

So he walks to Adam gives the ribs then he proceeds to remove Adam's mask to french kiss him. Then proceeds to walk out the busted door.

But not before looking at Lucifer and Lilith and saying "Our daughter is better than yours." Pointing at Lute as he said this. Then he leaves.

Leaving everyone process what happened.

Also leaving Adam having to explain who that was to his most hated enemies while trying to figure out how to tell Lute, He and his Husband see her as a Daughter.

Omg it definitely counts as an ask and fuck it's a good one on top of it!! It's cracky and I love myself a crack fic

Part 2

I bring the ribs, I bring the drama

pairing: Adam x male!reader

warnings: language

note: not beta read bc fuck you I don't have beta readers

When you got a text from Adam that informed you he had just reached hell and was attending the meeting scheduled with Lucifer and then spotted the robs you had made for him as a snack still standing on the counter, you did the only logical thing as the husband of the first man. You grabbed the plate filled with ribs and went after him and his forgetful ass.

Reaching hell sure wasn’t as hard as Adam always made it out to be, it was simply a long elevator ride that came with it and knowing the brunette the way you did that alone was reason enough to usually pull his little holograph stunt. But once Sera had caught onto that, she had had a serious talk with Adam, explaining why he wasn’t allowed to continue attending the meetings that way, so he had been forced to physically appear at this exact meeting. Which meant you had als a long ass elevator ride ahead of you. Nothing that would stop you from bringing your husband his much desired food though, you knew from experience how grumpy Adam could get if Sera sent him down to hell without a snack. And you desperately wanted to avoid grumpy Adam coming home only to realize that he had forgotten the snack you had prepared for him beforehand.

When the elevator doors opened with a quiet ‘ding’, you stepped through them and headed to the two winged doors right across the small elevator. You carelessly kicked the doors open, the handles on the inside both hit the walls with a loud ‘thud’ that echoed through the room that had gone quiet the second the doors had opened to reveal you. The glowing yellow eyes on Adam’s mask widened in shock as he spotted you, right in front of you sat Lucifer, his back had been facing the doors but the king of hell had turned around to look at you, confusion was written visible in his eyes as he tried to remember if he knew you. By his side was his wife Lilith. Great. The fuck-up and the cheating whore, both in the same room with your sweet darling. Seems like your little mission of food delivery was more needed than you had first thought it might be. But you knew Lilith was a pain in the ass and so was her husband. Lute fluffed out her wings as she narrowed your eyes before her expression turned into shock just like Adam’s.

In silence you walked around the ridiculously large table that was taking up most of the space in this room, given that its purpose was meetings it seemed to make sense though. You placed the plate in front of Adam, eyeing Lucifer and Lilith, hatred lingered in your eyes and you let the king and queen feel and see how much you despised them. They had caused nothing but trouble, they had been responsible for hell to even open its gates in the first place. Fuck-up, cheating bitches. Then your attention shifted from the married couple across the room to your husband. Hands reached for Adam’s mask and due to the element of surprise you had on your side, he was still trying to process that you had just walked in on this meeting like it was the most casual thing you had ever done in your entire existence, which is why he didn’t stop you from removing his mask. You placed it in his lap, careful not to drop it, you knew how much it meant to Adam and you weren’t intending on leaving scratches on it.

The golden eyes of your beloved were filled with shock and confusion, yet in the far back you saw a glimpse of thankfulness spark in them as you gently reached for his chin and pulled him into a kiss, it was meant to be a quick peck on the lips, but when Adam’s hand shot forwards to grab your waist and keep you close, you kept moving your lips against his. The presence of the others that kept you company inside this meeting room were forgotten in an instant, all that you could focus on were Adam’s soft lips that met your gentle movements so well. You slightly tilted your head to deepen the kiss, by squeezing his jaw you forced the first man to part his lips for you, providing the entrance your tongue needed to explore his mouth from the inside. When the tip of your tongue brushed against his, inviting him to dance with yours, Adam found himself unable to hold back the quiet moan that bled into the soft kiss you had started. And his tongue caught up quicker than his brain did, dancing with yours in Adam’s mouth as you claimed it as yours yet again.

When you pulled back in order to breathe in some stinky hell air - yet it was air so you didn’t mind all that much - you looked into Adam’s wide eyes, this time it wasn’t shock that reflected in them, it was love paired with desire and a shimmer of lust lurked in the back, you knew what he would give for you to stay, to keep kissing him like that, to maybe even sit down on his lap like the pretty little lap prince both of you knew you could be if only you wanted, but that wasn’t part of your mission. Your mission had included the task of bringing your husband food and that you had done successfully so you wiggled out of Adam’s lazy grip and pulled away from the first man entirely.

As if nothing had happened you rounded the table yet again to make your way over to the large doors you had just kicked in, yet you couldn’t help but stop on Lucifer’s side of the table. You slammed your hand down on the blue-ish looking wood, leaned in close to the blonde one and loudly stated, “Our daughter is better than yours, suck dick old fucker,” while you pointed at Lute to clarify which daughter you were speaking about. Lute’s expression shifted from shocked to confused and you watched as Adam’s lieutenant eyed the first man with a mix of confusion and pride. Then you straightened your back and walked out óf the room, once outside in the hall, you raised your hand to snap your fingers which resulted in the doors falling shut behind you with an equally loud sound as they had been opened with. And with that, you left hell again.

Once the door had fallen shut behind you, Adam had been quick to put his mask back on in order to hide the blush that started to bloom on his cheeks, Lucifer must not know about the effects you had on the first man, not when the blonde little devil sitting across from him was his sworn enemy. “Who was that?” the blonde man asked and pointed with his thumb to the closed doors behind him, an eyebrow was raised at Adam and even Lilith seemed to be curious about Adam’s answer to the question her husband had just asked the first man. Adam just and casually answered, “My fucking husband, bitch.” Because while your visit had been surprising, he would not deny you in front of Lucifer. He loved you and he was quite proud to be calling you his husband, fuck Lucifer’s opinion on it. “Daughter?” Lute asked as soon as Adam had answered Lucifer’s question and stepped up to her boss and best friend. The first man avoided meeting her eyes, even if it was just through masks. “Yeah, daughter. His idea not mine, fucking deal with it bitch. It brings my man joy so fucking take it.”

[cherry-pop-elf]

Human Nature

‘Poof’ Periwinkle Fairywinkle-Cosma x Fem! Reader

Sum: Hazel and Dev were at a cozy little sleep over at your house, since Dev was avoiding his father like the plague. Lead to plenty of talks about Poofs Peri’s childhood. So while the parents are away, it’s time for Peri to play

Warnings: 18+, lots of fluff, , first time (for Peri), boob jobs, Wholesome body positivity, Dominate Reader, it’s very fluffy and wholesome with sex because I said so, nonbinary peri rights, “Woah boobs-“ fairy anatomy vs human, kinda cracky but that’s why you are here anyway, and of course Peri Loves Them Tibbies

“Finally….” Peri gave a groan, as he would slump onto the floor. Not giving a single fairy fuck that he was laying on the cold kitchen ground. His parents can be overwhelming, and now you got to see it first hand.

Hazel, and Dev, were having a sleep over at your place. You were Dev’s neighbor, and one of the painfully few adults he can trust, so he wanted to feel like a normal kid with doing kid things. Like sleepovers.

The only friend he had was Hazel, and it’s hard to have a sleep over with out company. Has Peri’s god parent he couldn’t refuse. So the whole evening was spent with hijinx’s, and some good old parents squealing and sharing pictures a plenty.

You loved learning more about Peri, and did your best to try and give him breathing room. Being his little shield with trying to be the one to ask questions and happily look through the photo albums, while Peri was trying not to break his teeth from all the gritting.

So here you two were. Cosmo and Wanda making sure the kids were safely sleeping, and certainly knocked out themselves, as you two finally savored the peace and quiet of the rest of your home. Just away from it all.

“Say, not to still keep on topic, but I gotta ask. Your dad was the pregnant one, so um. Does that mean he’s trans?” You were curious. Could it be blamed? It would be interesting to know if such concepts like that were even existing across other beings. Curiosity is human nature, may it be for good or evil.

“Trans-? Oh! Trans! Nah-“ Given Peri was raised rather closely to humans, compared to frankly any fairy he certainly is often more aware of those concepts. There is a difference between taking care of a human, and living with a human after.

“Our genders, or is it sex-? Whatever. It’s flipped flopped. Men have the vaginas, girls have the penises. We also can shape-shift after all, so stuff like that is kinda pointless at the end of the day. Like how I was born a boy, but never really felt like a boy, so now I have a penis and go by he/they.” He explained to you, as you tossed him a soda.

“Huh….Girls have the male anatomy, boys have the female…..Woah.” Certainly fascinating to think about. It’s as if it’s a construct, who would have thought? Really was curious to you. Something new.

“And then there are different types of fairies. At the end of the day it doesn’t matter. Not unless you care, for some reason, or want to be intimate.” They would explain to you, as he drank his soda. Just enjoying the cold floor on his exhausted body. Even a fairy can get tired.

“So….Not to get weird, but like….Is your penis like….similar to a human penis?” You were to curious! Fairies were all so new to you! The only reason you were aware they exist was because Dev kinda made you aware. You were someone he trusted. He just had to have you involved. It’s a lot to handle after all. A kid is a kid.

“That’s one way to get into my pants.” He gave an eyebrow wiggle, as you hid behind your soda. A whine of protest, as he laughed at you. Just always the charmer. The one to lead the tango. Maybe you want to spin that dance around.

“Why don’t you show me what’s under the top and I’ll show you what’s under this bottom~” You knew he was just being all talk. They typically were, before suddenly ready for a panic attack. You didn’t want to give him one, but there’s joy in making someone squirm.

“What are you doing-?” He gawked, as he saw that you were following through. Off your shirt went, and you sent it flying over to his face. How it dangled off their crown, leaving just one big violet eye to stare at you. To watch as you unclasped your bra. It was a long day, and underwire is painful.

“I know they aren’t the prettiest things around-“ You started, only to be met with those big fairy eyes sparkling. Literally. Like his pupils were just big ole hearts and sparkles. Seemed to be utterly enchanted at your half bare body.

The fairy was quick to zoom over to you, with your shirt gone in a vanished, as he seemed to be enchanted by your anatomy. That you had to be the prettiest person in the whole world. The whole galaxy! Their eyes were just pure. Not just driven. Not sexually charged. Just admiring you like a sunset.

“You wanna touch them?” You asked, finding it all utterly adorable. We’re all fairies this cute? Had to. Just look at him. How his wings were fluttering like crazy, and their head nodding in eager need. Need to just swallow you whole with his touch.

They were hesitant, but his hands would soon cup them. They were so gentle. Not an ounce of green in those finger tips. Just a fairy enjoying the beauty that a human had. Made you wonder how different fairy’s breasts were compared to humans. Were they different at all? Not like you wanted to ask Wanda to flash you.

“So soft….” He whispered, as he soon just face planted into your chest. Had you laugh, as he seemed to have found heaven in them. Fluttery wings just going wild, as he snuggled into them. Enjoying how soft they were, and easy it was to hear your heartbeat like this. They were just perfect for them.

“You are precious.” You had to admit, as you soon would play with their hair. Gently running your fingers on the back of his neck. Didn’t want to mess with his curl after all. Just wanted to enjoy the gentle little affection. Seemed he was enjoying it plenty.

“So….Gonna keep your end of the deal?” A muffled ‘hm?’ Was spoken into your chest, as you swore he was ready to fall asleep there. The warmth, softness, heartbeat, breathing, they just couldn’t resist it. His kryptonite.

“Come on, it’s fair. Lemme see your magic wand~” You giggled, as you had to pretty much prey his pouting face from your chest. Poor man wanted more, and you’ll be happy to give him more. Such a pouty baby. Arms all crossed, and all huffy.

“Pretty please~? I promise you can play with my boobs more if you do it~” You offered the magical creature. That seemed to be what finally made him follow through. Slowly with sliding his suspenders off his shoulder, before working on his buckle.

“Promise?” He asked, and you nodded. As if you could ever say no to those beautiful eyes. Such a shade of purple you couldn’t quite grasp. As if it was just a color that the human eye couldn’t quite register. It made for such a need to look at them more.

With the zipper down, and some shimmying, you finally got to see what you were excited for. Deep down, you were kinda disappointed though. Not by the dick as a whole. It was a normal dick, that was the issue. Nothing really made it seem supernatural, besides the well groomed purple patch of hair above it. Shaped like a star no less. Ok, that was cute. You couldn’t argue with it. Was going to make your next idea all the easier to follow through.

“As promises, I’ll let you play with my boobs again. But, I have an idea on how you can enjoy them more.” You offered, as he rose a curious brow at you. What could that possibly mean?

“What are you doing down there?” He asked, as you were soon on your knees. Your face under his cock, with a devious smile. The fact he asked you gave into your theory he may be a virgin. You were certain to make this something he will never forget.

“Showing you the magical world of boob jobs.” You said, before you brought his soft cock between your breasts. Gentle you were, as you would slide his dick between them. Squeezing it between your soft tissue, with little kisses to the tip.

“Oh sweet fairy world-“ He moaned, as he held onto the counter for support. Truly an experience they never had before. Was making their whole world spin, as their cock was starting to harden with in your grasp. Mans was in heaven because of you.

“Like it?” You asked, as they eagerly nodded. Just an utter puddle under you. Luckily not literally. Just figuratively. How they were gripping the counter for dear life as they were panting hard. Those pretty eyes fluttered closed, as those thick eyelashes of his were sparkling with held back tears.

You couldn’t help but drink it all in. They looked so perfect like this. Just letting out moans for you to listen on repeat. How so little was to much. You didn’t even do much, and you swore they would cum already. Would their cum be purple too? You just had to know.

You would speed it up, with a devious grin, as he was aching between your breasts. Just throbbing for you. Such a mess from so little. Suppose breasts were their one way ticket to their own heaven on earth.

“Oh jeez oh jeez oh jeez-“ They kept whimpering. Teeth biting hard into their lip, as he just couldn’t stop his whimpers and moans. A harmony of sounds for you to dance to. Ever growing more eradicated in their sounds.

“Gonna cum? Cum all over my tits?” You asked, as that had his already flustered face even redder than ever. Just looking at the sight under him was too much. He couldn’t handle it anymore. He just couldn’t.

“WAIT WAIT I-! AH-!” His hips were soon bucking on their own, as the orgasm hit him. The way their head threw back as their body was on autopilot. Riding out the climax. Just listening to what the new burst of adrenaline in their system gave them.

You were a little disappointed, you couldn’t lie, that it was a normal color. Was hoping it was at least lavender. Didn’t disappoint in the amount though. Was Al over your breasts, your face, you swore it reached your hair even. That’s annoying, but it’s forgiven for Peri. Their first time after all. Can’t be mad at that.

Poor Peri was just trembling. Hardly able to keep themselves up, as you stood up. You were glad you were still in the kitchen, so you just dampened a fish towel to clean yourself up. Probably safer to not consume fairy jizz. Who knows what it could do to your insides. That’s for another day.

“You alright over there?” You asked them, as you would look over. Poor Peri was just a mess. Hair all over the place, still flushed and panting, legs bend and feet turned in. Thought they might faint. Had you worried, before he was soon back to trying to play it cool. Like nothing had happened at all.

“Yep! Totally! Cool cool cool-!” Pants zipped, hair slicked back, just in a blink and it was like he didn’t just have the best nut of his life. Had you giggling, before you returned to him. A kiss to his cheek, and a hug. Because after care is always vital.

“Say uh, um. Do you….Do you think we could do that again sometime?” They asked, as they avoided eye contact with you. Oh who could resist such a cute face? Not you. You gave his flushed little cheek another peck, as you laced both your hands together. Just all smiles.

“As you wish.”

[olderthannetfic]

I accidentally killed my own desire to write, and I need some advice. To be really blunt about it, what's the point of writing? When I would spend lots of time laboring over making a good story with a plot and characters who were in-character and connecting all the dots narratively so payoffs were satisfying, my reward was dead silence and virtually no clicks. I posted some mindless smut to my side account one day and got more hits in a day than most of my other works combined got in a year. I know, I know. "Write for ~*~yourself~*~" is the common response. It's the "be yourself!" of writing. It's supposed to be a magical phrase that'll make everything okay. But... I don't like knowing that something I spend months working on won't be read by anyone while something I write in a car while bored got thousands of clicks. I don't like making something I'm proud of and then no one ever looks at it. That's not fun for me. It's not fulfilling.

For a solid decade, I've tried to ignore how the level of interactivity in fandom is falling. Fewer comments. Fewer kudos. No comments in the bookmarks. You put your tumblr and Discord in the AN and get a handful of asks and one person who adds you, talks to you twice and then ghosts you. Most of the comments are "well, actuallys", made even more annoying by them being wrong as opposed to actually correcting an error. I avoid fandom drama, wank, and infighting. I don't engage with things I know will make me unhappy. I try to be happy over in my own little corner. I comment on every single work I read. I want people to enjoy fandom. I used to.

Some dumb smut I wrote in 40 minutes gets five times the hits of the writing I'm most proud of, and it gets it in just under three months. I am not a great smut writer. I haven't stumbled onto an incredible talent I had that makes it so the issue is that I'm so amazing my smut brings all the boys to the yard. People just don't like what I write and put effort into. It's very likely that despite 20 years of writing fic, I suck at writing. And people enjoy my writing most when they don't have to put up with anything substantial and can just skip to the sex.

So for the last eight months, when I write, I just sort of give up. Close the Word doc without saving. No one will read this. No one cares about this. There is no fan eagerly awaiting every update like I await updates from my favorite authors. There's not even someone saying, "update soon!" Close the Word doc. Delete old WIPs. There's no point. I do not tell stories worth reading. I used to. In the FFN days people genuinely enjoyed my work. I'd never have had an opportunity to do the 'I won't update until I get 3 reviews' thing because getting that many on a chapter was usually something I'd do overnight. Post before bed. Wake up. Read the reviews before school. I peaked in high school, I guess.

And now I'm just sort of lost. I still have lots of ideas. Ideas for fics fall into my head all the time. That's never been a problem. What I don't have is any motivation to write them. What's the point of writing? If no one else is reading, I guess the point would be so I could go back and read my own story and have fun with it. Write for myself. But I can review the story and have fun with it in my head without writing it down. It's substantially faster and more importantly, isn't incredibly depressing.

So, at the risk of definitely being calld the second-coming of True Art Anon or a troll or validation-seeking or haha mentally ill haha... what's the point of writing?

--

Okay, so write porn in a car while you're bored.

Look, you can whine all you want about my response, but what you've written here is blatantly about depression.

Lots of people in fandom are still interacting. And no, it isn't just on fics that are objectively written to some pro fiction standard or whatever. Teenagers still breathlessly review poorly spelled cracky masterpieces about this year's big anime and so forth.

Yes, there may be reasons why you in particular are in a slump when it comes to fandom friendships or "plz update" comments. We can talk about that. But this ask is all gloom about fandom in general. That's not realism: that's you having a problem.

--

As for why a person should write: because the actual hours you spend doing the writing are fun.

If they aren't pleasurable in some way, find another hobby.

--

But if you want an answer to the age old "Why did my 5 minute fic get 1000000x more asspats", I've seen meta about this for literally decades.

The most likely reason is that the fic we write quickly and without much thought often feels fresher and more fun. The things we labor over endlessly can feel overworked. Even in cases where they don't, they're often heavier subject matter or more niche subject matter. On top of all that, we just care more, so even a high level of feedback doesn't really feel like enough for the effort and care we put in.

--

Do you really need me to tell you why you don't feel the same as in high school when things were fresh and new?

Go read up on combatting burnout or dealing with post-college anxiety or managing stress in a dead-end job in your 30s or finding meaning in your 40s or whatever is going on.

Everyone goes through fallow periods in fandom and in life.

Feeling reinvigorated has to do with internal factors and some general life circumstance stuff. It doesn't have that much to do with number of kudos. That's just the surface trigger for a mood that was already there.

[vixensbrainrotts]

Lipgloss lover — Ken <Draken> Ryuguji

Content: fluffy imagine

Warnings: too much fluff

Tropes: established relationship, whipped! Draken

Summary: You really thought that he wouldn’t notice?

Vixen’s two cents: Hi! Here’s something based of a real life experience i had (i couldn’t figure out what the flavor of one of my friend’s lipglosses was after borrowing). I love Draken so much, so let’s celebrate my first Draken post together! Lmk if you like this, and if you have ideas for more little scenarios, my requests are OPEN!! Also, im currently on the hunt for moots to proofread and triangulate with! If you’re interested, please contact me <3. Now enjoy!

Ken furrows his brows after you’ve pulled away from the kiss and were now walking towards the refrigerator. He licks his lips precariously and smacks them a few times for good measure. Something is off about this.

“Babe!” He calls out to you, voice gruff and serious. You turn around a little startled and try to hide a smile when you see the frown on his face. “Everything all right?”

He shakes his head in response. “Mmh I don’t know. Something’s weird.” He waves you over expectantly, his wrist flicking fast to convey his urgency.

With a giggle you go over to him and stand between his legs where he was sitting at the table. “Yes handsome?” Your hand glides over both his shoulders, coming to scratch over his nape and up his scalp.

Draken hums in response, both hands sliding up your thighs and coming to rest on your hips, and tilts his head up to look at you. “Kiss me again.”

“Your wish is my command.” You whisper and lean down to meet him in the middle, and you feel his arms slither and tighten around your hips, his fingers tickling your stomach a little.

When you pull away again Draken’s eyebrows are still furrowed, lips still puckered to a pout. “You did something. What the hell is on your lips?” You laugh a little “What do you mean?”

“You taste different, normally you’ve got this whole cherry-coconut wombo-combo going on but now? Fuck me girl, kiss me again and lemme try ‘n figure out what you taste like.”

Your heart flutters a little and your smile widens a little, and you’re very happy to kiss him again. This time he pulls away “Gimme a tip, love. Do I know the taste? Have you had it before?” You smile and nod. “You know the taste yes, but I haven’t worn it before.”

“Fuck.” He mumbles and licks his lips, looking around the kitchen as if that would help. “You want me to tell you?” You ask him and his eyes snap towards you again immediately. “No. One more kiss and if I can’t figure it out then, sure.”

“Ok.” You Kiss him once more, and when you go to pull away this time, his lips chase yours and his arms tighten around your waist.

“Damn it Baby i don’t know. Hit me.” His eyes are still closed from the kiss and he lays his head on your stomach with a sigh. Lovingly, you card your hands through his hair. “Why would I hit you?!” You giggle.

“Hit me with the cold, hard truth.” Your smile widens knowingly at that, and you take a moment to soak in the comfortable silence with him in your arms.

“Green tea.” You state.

“Fucking what?!” His head moves away from your stomach to throw you a bewildered look, and he look almost offended. “How the fuck could I have known that? Green tea? Fucking cracky ass flavor no wonder I didnt guess it!” He complains whiningly, and you offer him a kiss to the forehead as consolation.

“So you dont like it?” You ask with a smile, fingers coming to caress his cheek bones. “Never said that, c’mere Girl.” You kiss him again, and again, and again…

[micamicster]

19th life simply does not have It

Gonna say something mean 💕 in my reblog let’s keep this between us girls ok?

[biggestsimp12]

Cheesy woo attempts!

In which they (or you) are trying to seduce you with cheesy pick up lines!

Characters- Itto, Cyno, Lyney, Xiao.

Prompt- none. Just some cracky idea I got.

(characters+rule list here-feel free to request anything!)

-------–––––———

Lyney

GIF by c6jpg

“Are you a magician? Because when I’m looking at you, you make everyone else disappear!”

Confused. It took him a few good seconds before realizing what you did there.

He proceeds to have the biggest smug smile on his face (with a hint of blush as well,) persuaded to join in your little game that you're playing.

"Not sure dear. But I know something else for sure I can make disappear~"

He winked mischievously and sets his arm around your shoulder before continuing his phrase.

"And that's your dating availability, my dear!~"

He snickered before planting a big smooch on your lips, making a rose appear behind your ear. This checky bastard knows all too well he left you speechless and flustered. After all, that's the way he likes it.

--––——

Cyno

GIF by k0komis

The pair of you were patrolling together through the Sumeru's desert Great Red Sand, enduring the painfully annoying heat and the flying wind which was like purposely aimed straight in your guys' faces.

Cyno seemed to be used to this since he carries out these patrols daily, unlike you, who's only joined him in the range over recently.

Therefore, you kept sneezing from the flying sand that entered your nastrals, proceeding to make your nose runny and eyes watery. Seeing this, Cyno being the person he is, logically attempted on making your mood better.

“I’d say God bless you, but it looks like he already has!”

Typical Cyno joke. It made you blush a little so I guess he thinks it was worth it?

----––——

Xiao

“Do you believe in love at first sight—or should I walk by again?”

Another one who's confused. However, this time, this unfortunate fella has barely a tiny idea about what love is yet, so he isn't really thick with the concept. You have some explaining to do since this guy will assume it is another one of those mortal shenanigans you like to pull on him.

What type of mortal.. What was the word again? Firt? Uhm no, that's not it.. Oh, right.. "Flirt." What kind of mortal fir- "flirt" are you doing again? Am I supposed to laugh or..?

Why so cold and dry answer dear? No you need me to warm your heart up?

You officially broke Xiao lmao

--––——

Itto

You were walking through Inazuma, the land of Electro. You spotted a sweet and lollipop stand, which reminded you of Itto and his favorite treats. The shop also had his colors, which were red and white. You couldn't help but think how much Itto would love this place, and mutter that you wished he was there.

As you purchased two lollipops, you didn't realize that Itto was behind them. He startled you by jumping to you in a goofy way.

"Granted! Well, here I am. What are your other two wishes?"

You turn around and chuckle at him, asking what he's doing here. Itto responds with another cheesy line, saying that he came for something amazing, but found you instead.

You roll your eyes, but couldn't help feeling slightly flustered. You shove one of the lollipops into Itto's mouth, who continues to say cheesy pick-up lines to flirt with you.

Itto's goofy and smug behavior continues, but you're slightly amused. They eat the other lollipop, and they proceed to banter with each other as Itto continues to flirt with them. You can't help but feel a little flustered, but at the same time, you can't help but admire Itto's charm.

---———–

The end <3

(requests are always open and welcomed!^^)

[pilot-boi]

god now i’m just imagining Blake suddenly realizing and saying “you knew you had to drink the poison”

And Jaune just isn’t able to meet anyone’s eyes

The five sit around a campfire scrounged together from dead brush in an alcove protected from the desert wind. Their conversation is slow, comforting, filled with hushed reassurances and rueful laughter.

With the benefit of distance, of being free, talk eventually turns to Jaune’s missing years. Simple curiousity, simple questions.

He doesn’t answer everything, but every word he says seems to draw some invisible hurt from a wound left festering for too long.

It’s Blake that brings it up.

Of course she is. She was the one to realize they were in a fairytale, the one who reminded them all how to play along with the fantasy while keeping their sanity. Their resident bookworm.

Of course she’s the one who realizes that their friend knew going in that he was probably going to die before the end of “the story.”

“Jaune?” Blake’s voice is quiet, but calm as a pool of water. “You knew, didn’t you?” Weiss can see how her amber eyes narrow, the agitated flick of her ears, but none of her distress is betrayed in her voice.

Which is just as well, because Jaune doesn’t meet any of their eyes, he just watches the fire. The white locks in his hair are stark against the rest, and not for the first time Weiss wonders if they’re a result of age or stress or something worse.

“Not right away,” he replies. And is that better or worse? That it took a little while for him to realize that he’d die before the story’s end, and he still kept to the script? “Before we reached the Red King.”

“Were you… Did you…” Weiss isn’t sure what she wants to ask, or if she even wants an answer. Were you scared? Did you know when it would happen? Were you ready? Did you want it to happen?

“I had to follow the story,” he says eventually, his voice breaking with emotion. Aged beyond his years, and yet still as young as any of them. “I had… It was my role. I couldn’t- I had to-”

“The Rusted Knight drank the poison in her stead,” Ruby says hollowly. “Would you have done it for me?” Jaune’s head shoots up, fast as a bullet, his face a mask as hard as the metal of his helmet.

Blue eyes aged beyond the years of the face they rest in meet silver eyes haunted by death and rebirth. The tension in the air is taut as a bow string, as the two leaders seem to communicate something only they understand.

A chunk of ice the size of her fallen home drops into Weiss’s stomach. The poison. The tea.

If Jaune had been there in time, would he have even hesitated to drink the tea for Ruby? Finally fulfilling his fairytale role? Finally doing something “right?”

Weiss is quite sure that would’ve only ended with BOTH leaders on the verge of ascension, instead of one. Because if Ruby had lost another friend, Weiss is certain that it would’ve pushed her over an edge she would never have returned from.

The desert wind fills the silence.

Jaune’s gaze falls back to the fire. “After the Herbalist, I was desperate to get the story back on track. I would’ve done anything to fix what I broke.”

“Even die?” Yang’s voice is steady as stone, but her hand is shaking in Blake’s grasp.

There are tears dripping down his face. He never processed this, Weiss realizes. He never processed anything, stuck as he was as the only thing changing in a world where everything stayed the same.

“I just wanted to do something right.” His voice sounds like he dropped it on the floor, it shattered, and he kept using it anyway. Cracky in that way it used to in Beacon. Too old and too young.

“I was the Rusted Knight, a paragon of virtue and glory, but I was messing it all up.” As he speaks, his voice gets more frantic, more hitched with tears. “We were at the end, there was no more story left. There was only one thing I could do to make sure they got their happy ending. And- And I-”

“I’m glad you didn’t have to,” Ruby interrupts, her voice choking with tears. I hate that it happened, that she poisoned you, but I’m glad you didn’t have to.” And again, it’s his fellow leader’s voice that draws Jaune out of himself.

But this time he looks like Jaune, all wide eyes and soft edges, not the metal of the Rusted Knight he was protecting himself with before. And Ruby looks like Ruby, older and wiser but with a spark of hope in her teary eyes that Weiss didn’t realize has been missing until they all almost lost it forever.

Ruby stands and walks around the fire, her boots making furrows in the sand, and pulls him into a hug. Jaune blinks, half afraid, half confused.

“It wasn’t your fault.”

Weiss barely hears Ruby murmur this over the crackle of the flames, and whether she’s talking about Penny or Alyx or Pyrrha or Atlas or any number of things that both leaders have blamed themselves for over the years, Weiss doesn’t know.

But what she does know is that when Jaune chokes out a sob and buries his face in Ruby’s hair, and Ruby drops to her knees clings to her best friend like he’s the only thing anchoring her to Remnant, something slots back into place in the universe. Something that fractured almost beyond repair on the shore of a razed village of paper stars.

Jaune’s hair is streaked with white, Ruby’s whole body is shaking with sobs, and Jaune is whispering apologies that Ruby is meeting with her own. But they’re both still here. It feels like healing, or the very start of it.

And maybe Jaune would have drunk the poison for Alyx, but he didn’t get to. And maybe Jaune would have drink the tea for Ruby, but he didn’t get to. The world was full of what-ifs, gods the Ever After probably used as them as damn building blocks.

But what matters is that he didn’t, and that he would never have to.

[shadowmaat]

Fox's Wonderful Day (redux)

Corrie Week, Day 7: Free Space Fox Day

I'm going to be incredibly self-indulgent by reviving and expanding a cracky thing I wrote a few years ago.

-

It was Race Night in the lower levels, and Fox had deployed extra teams to keep watch in hopes of finally catching a break.

He hated Race Nights. Or, more specifically, he hated that the illegal podracing circuit seemed to have no regard for the safety of those around them.

It was one thing to put your own life in danger with stupid stunts and souped-up racers, but to put ordinary citizens at risk with dangerous speeds, illegal maneuvers, and no regard for public or personal property. Race Nights always saw an increase in injury reports and property damage. And, of course, there were all the connections between the racing circuit and some of the most unsavory criminal organizations on Coruscant. Fox was sick of it.

They were rarely able to net any leads, but this time, somehow, they caught a big one.

Nika Skye was one of the kings of the raceway. And one of the most dangerously reckless ones. Fox had a list of all the crimes that could be laid at Skye's feet. Even if he was never caught, even if none of the charges stuck, Fox still wanted that proof.

"Fox! Sir! I got 'im!"

Hound's voice crackled over the comm, followed by a vid clip of Skye arm-in-arm with a beautifully-dressed woman. Far too beautiful to be safe in that neighborhood.

Skye turned his head to smile at his girlfriend just as the lights of a passing speeder framed them.

Fox stared. He played back the clip. He played it again. He paused it just as the light fully revealed Skye's face. He grinned.

"Stay on them, Hound," he ordered. "Do NOT lose them! I'm on my way to you right now!"

He was already running out the door. Guardsmen flattened themselves against the wall as he passed, and he knew they'd be worried to see their Commander running, but explanations could wait. This was too big, too important for decorum.

Hound kept him updated as be broke a few speed rules of his own in order to catch up.

"Uh... sir?"

Dread curled in Fox's stomach at the Trooper's sudden reluctant tone.

"You didn't lose them, did you?"

"Oh, no sir," Hound reassured him. "It's just, uh... they've gone into the Nookie Nook."

Fox's grin grew even wider as he swung around a final turn, using signals and staying aware of everything and everyone around him.

The "Nookie Nook" was the unofficial name for one of the small, public gardens that were scattered through this sector of Coruscant. It was in slightly better shape than most and provided a little shelter for those seeking to get high... or those seeking a different kind of thrill.

The most important part of it was that it was a public garden. Coruscant had laws against public indecency. Very minor ones, for the most part, and as long as everything was consensual, the Guard was willing to turn a blind eye to a little bit of public sex, but not this time.

There was nowhere to park, of course, so Fox simply found an out-of-the-way spot, parked, and put his Guard placard in the window.

Hound was standing with his back to the entrance of the Nook, fidgeting. Grizzer sat beside him, but stood to wag her tail as Fox approached.

"They still in there?"

Grunts and moans answered him before Hound could.

"...Yessir."

"Don't worry, Hound, I've got this."

The tiniest of giggles escaped him. Hound froze.

"Uh? Are you- I mean, yessir!"

He stepped out of the way. Fox gave him a reassuring pat and moved in. He made sure his helmet was recording- for evidence- and then hit the lights on his helmet.

"Coruscant Guard! Come out with your hands up!"

Screaming. Swearing. The desperate rustle of clothing and displaced foliage.

"Go away!" an all-too-familiar voice snarled. "This is none of your business!"

"Public indecency is very much my business, sir." Fox struggled to keep his tone calm and bored. "Now, step out and prepare to be arrested!"

There was more arguing, of course, but eventually the couple stepped into full, inescapable view.

Anakin Skywalker looked furious and ready to strangle him. His girlfriend, Senator Amidala, at least had the decency to look mortified, trying to shield her face with one hand while the other kept her dress held in place.

"You can't do this to us!" Skywalker growled. "Do you know who I am?"

"Nika Skye," Fox answered. "Street racer responsible for multiple accidents, injuries, and property damage."

Nika Skye. Of all the stupid, ham-fisted aliases he could have picked... but then Fox hadn't really thought about it himself until he got a good look at him. The promo images and candids always showed him in his racing helmet. Ha. Apparently even an idiot could learn a thing or two from his betters. Wait til Rex found out.

Skywalker blinked, appearing caught off guard.

"Well, yeah! That!" he said. "Except I never hurt anyone! I'm just an ordinary citizen, enjoying a night out with my wife."

"We're so sorry for the trouble, Commander," Amidala said, voice dripping professional sincerity. "It won't happen again, I promise. If you'll just let us go-"

"I'm afraid I can't do that, ma'am," Fox said. He hoped the Jedi couldn't sense his glee. "Public indecency is a crime on Coruscant. And there's also the matter of Mr. Skye's multiple traffic violations, involvement in an illegal racing ring with ties to the Black Sun Syndicate-"

Amidala gasped. Skywalker just looked annoyed.

"-as well as damaged property, speeders, and personal injuries related to those traffic violations. Once we're back at the station, you'll be allowed to call an attorney."

"You won't take us in."

There was a pressure to Skywalker's words, an urge to obey, but Fox ignored it.

"We can also provide an attorney for you, if you don't have one of your own," he concluded. He was willing to bet that Amidala, at least, had a whole fleet of lawyers at her beck and call, and he knew the Jedi had some of their own as well.

"Did you hear me?" Skywalker's glare intensified. "I said you won't-"

"Come with us, sir. Quietly," Fox told him. "Resisting arrest will only make things worse." He reached for the binders on his belt.

"Ani." Amidala placed a hand on her boyfriend's arm, but he shook it off, still glaring.

"You'll regret this, Commander," he said. "I'll have your job for this."

Fox rolled his eyes. "Good luck with that, sir. I've been trying to get out of it since the war started."

He did, in fact, get to put binders on Skywalker, citing him as a flight risk. It was one of the greatest moments of his life.

Hound and Grizzer provided backup as they made their way back to the speeder.

"Are you sure about this, Fox?" Hound asked, as they headed back to headquarters. He'd twigged to Skye's true identity as well. "We could get in a lot of trouble for this."

"The Jedi aren't above the law," Fox told him. "And that goes double for Skywalker. Arrogant little shit has been a vibroblade in my side for too long. Flaunting the laws. Acting like he's better than us. Taking advantage of his 'friendship' with the Chancellor to make everything better for himself with no regard for anyone else-"

"Yeah, okay, I know," Hound interrupted. He shifted on the passenger seat, Grizzer in his lap. "But this is gonna bring in the Jedi-"

"I'm counting on that."

"And probably the Chancellor. Like you said, they're friends."

Fox paused. That was a big concern, and the only dark spot in this otherwise wonderful day.

"I'll handle it," he said. He was not giving up this chance for a little payback.

-

Skywalker's story changed as soon as they were in the Processing Room.

"Look, Commander, you really don't want to do this," he said. "I know the Guard doesn't see a lot of action here on Coruscant-"

The thunderous whoosh of indrawn breaths from the listening Guards drowned out his next words.

"...Anakin Skywalker."

Fox refused to rise to the insult Skywalker had carelessly flung at the Guard. Chances were he actually believed what he said.

"And yet your ID says you're Nika Skye."

That earned him another scowl. "Are we really going to play this game, Fox? I know you can't be that stupid."

Fox muted the general chatter feed. Guard opinion of Skywalker was mixed, but mostly positive bordering on indifferent. That was being revised downward fast.

"Lieutenant Rattle, add possession of false ID and lying to an officer of the law to the list of charges," Fox said.

"Mmm," Rattle murmured. Her hands shook more than usual as she added the charges.

"I OUTRANK YOU!" Skywalker roared, making everyone flinch.

Amidala, who'd been on a comm call, turned to look at him.

"It's okay, Ani, I'm handling it," she said.

"You may outrank me, General, but you don't outrank the law." Fox had taken an involuntary half-step back at Skywalker's outburst.

Skywalker closed his eyes and took a deep breath in an apparent effort to calm himself. When he looked at Fox again, his eyes were still bright with rage, but a smile was plastered across his face.

"At least let Pad- Senator Amidala go," he said. "She's an innocent in all of this."

Fox arched a brow, not that Skywalker could see it. Amidala was many things, but innocent wasn't one of them. She was in deep with Skywalker and his schemes, and was probably one of the reasons they hadn't caught him until now.

Still. She was a Senator, and that would be a whole political mess of its own. He tilted his helmet.

"She'll stay here until her security team arrives and then reassess," he said.

Skywalker huffed, rolling his eyes. "Finally! Some sense! I guess I'm so used to Rex-"

"Who's your emergency contact?" Fox interrupted.

"My what?" Skywalker's frown seemed more confused than angry this time.

"Who should we call at the Temple to alert them to your circumstances?"

It was like flipping a switch. Gone was Skywalker's arrogance and bluster. It was replaced with fear and anxiety.

"Oh, uh, that- that won't be necessary, right?"

He was looking anywhere but at Fox. Interesting.

"It's- it's High General Kenobi, sir," Rattle supplied.

Skywalker flinched. "Here?! He can't be! He's supposed to be in a meeting with the High Council!"

Fox's grin returned.

"Thanks, Rattle. I'll be sure to give him a call and let him know his former Padawan is safe."

And wouldn't that be a fun call. In a meeting with the other High Generals? And Fox could interrupt? The day kept getting better and better.

"Wait! No!"

"Burke, Boot, please escort General Skywalker to holding," he said. "We wouldn't want anything to happen to him before General Kenobi gets here."

"Sir!" They said in tandem, moving to herd the suddenly worried Skywalker to the cells.

"Commander Fox," Amidala said, holding the comm to her chest as she spoke. "I know we've caused unbearable upset for you and your Guard, but-"

"Senator Amidala, ma'am," he said. "You're free to leave once your security detail arrives. What you do to help your 'husband' after that is your business."

The already pale Amidala went chalk-white at his words. About the security detail? Or- shit. He'd thought Skywalker was bluffing about the wife thing. The Storms had truly blessed him on this day.

"Please," Amidala whispered, her eyes wide. "You can't tell-"

"If you'll excuse me, ma'am, I have a lot of work to do. Have a good night."

He dipped his head in acknowledgement and headed back to his office. There was so much to do and all of it was good. If there was a slight skip in his step as he walked, well, no one would believe it.