#this feels like an early birthday present THIS IS SOOOOOO

[curi0uscreature]

* FOUND THE PN MIRAHEZE AND CLEAR BOB CONCEPT ART AND IM. EMOTIONS /VPOS

[yuwuta]

on scale of 1 - 10, how extra is yuuji on his gfs bday?

1000000/10. honestly, he’s not even extra in the making a show of everything sort of way, it’s just extra attention. he’s pretty much fused to you the entire day, if he could do nothing but give you kisses and hold you close to him and try to bury you in his ribcage, then he would. even when you two are eating or walking around, yuuji can’t take his eyes off of you, his pupils are wide and filled with so much love and appreciation for you, anybody could see it from a mile away

it starts in the morning. if he’s not waking up next to you, then he’s the first person to call you bright and early in the morning to start your day. he makes you breakfast and makes you pinky promise to stay in bed until he brings it to you, and he’s so excited when he brings the tray into your room that he trips and damn near spills the whole thing but at least he’s got quick reflexes so the worse doesn’t happen. he sits next to you on the bed, back straight, eyes on your lips as you take your first bite, preening for praise about the food and if he had a tail, it’d be wagging expectantly. a few bites in his jumps up and decides that he wants to feed you and his eye contact is so intense and mushy and love filled you feel like you need to look away for a moment to breathe, but he won’t have that; he follows wherever you go, even when you push him away and tell him you have to wash your face and get ready for the day, he just nods and stands by like a little guard dog watching you.

he also takes at least three million photos of you throughout the day. as your walking, when you’re with your friends, while you’re eating, makes sure to ask to someone to capture all the cheek kisses he gives you and sends them to satoru and nanami, who both send you their congrats and well wishes (and probably an overpriced present too). he makes you pose for pictures too, always claiming “just one more! one more! you look so pretty, let me take one more,” and it’s not just one more but there’s no stopping yuuji once he puts his mind to something.

the amount of times he just. randomly picks you up throughout the day. you’ll be chilling or whatever and it’s like too much cute aggression hits him in that moment and he has to smother you. he picks you up bridal style and spins you around and then holds you as close to his chest as possible to squeeze like he needs you to feel all the love he has for you. peppers a million kisses around your face before letting your feet on the ground again, and even then you’re not free because he wraps an arm around your shoulder and presses another wet kiss to your cheek before telling you happy birthday for the 100th time he just loves you soooooo much and he’s gonna take the opportunity to go overboard today <333

[noahsmuse]

second chance?

✮ PAIRING: noah sebastian x reader

✮ REQUEST: “Can I request a second chance romance one shot? Like in 2020 - 2021 the reader and Noah were dating and they break up for [insert reason] but they run into each other at the BMTH concert in 2024 or something and one thing leads to another suddenly they you know, hooked up and Noah doesn't want it to be a one night stand with her soooooo you can go from there.”

✮ A/N: sorry for the recent inactivity but now, i’m BACKKKK! continue sending in requests for me to write & hope you all like this fic ≧'◡'≦

everything seemed picture perfect between you two. the makeshift dates and the candle-lit dinners that would be hosted in his dining room with dinner that you both made, and just when you thought that the pair of you were full from dinner he was usually still hungry….but for something else (you). in a world of what seemed to be chaos, you found solace within each other.

until, the time came that heavy pandemic restrictions were slowly being lifted and Bad Omens was scheduled their first tour back to be openers for In This Moment and Ice Nine Kills. going from seeing noah almost every single day to barely hearing from him was a very intense switch that put a strain on your relationship since communication was such a huge trait for the two of you.

knowing this would probably only get worse as they’re gonna get busier and continue going on tour. even though you two loved each other to the ends of the earth, when he came back you both made the decision to break up but still remain friends to avoid any heartbreak or miscommunication.

this brings us back to present day, it’s been three years since you’ve broken up with noah. you both talk occasionally and send the usual happy holidays and birthday messages but haven’t actually seen each other face to face since the break up.

one day you hear your phone going off like CRAZY, you managed to find out that one of your girlfriends was able to get pit tickets for a Bring Me The Horizon concert happening in your city. prior to these messages from your friends, you had zero idea they were coming to your town and who would be with them, but decided why not go and have some fun!!!

the day that you and your friends have been so estatic about finally comes around, you’re all dressed to the nines, wearing your sexiest but comfortable attire that perfectly matches the mood for the concert. since the adrenaline is pumping throughout your friend groups veins, all of you decide to make it to the venue just early enough to secure the merch that you’ve had your eye on and your spots for barricade.

after waiting for a few hours, the doors of the venue open and everyone runs while holding each others hands to make it right in the center of barricade with a perfect view of the stage.

around an hour goes by, you still have no idea who the openers will be until the crew of the band lowers down a tapestry with a name that sounds very familiar to you….’Bad Omens’, and that’s when it clicks in your head that your ex boyfriend’s band is an opener for the tour. obviously you don’t wanna seem like an obsessive person to him but you’re literally sitting front row, right in the center, so there’s definitely no way that you could hide.

as soon as you start trying to think up of a plan to make sure noah doesn’t see you in the crowd, the lights abruptly go dark and small vibrations rumble through the ground of the arena with jolly, one of noah’s best friends and roommates comes out right in front of you playing the riffs of a song that you learn is called artificial suicide from their newest album (one that you also learn you were the muse for a couple of songs on the record), ‘The Death Of Peace Of Mind.’

even though you didn’t really know the words to their newer work since you’ve only really heard the demos and songs from the band’s first two records, you can help but feel proud for how far they’ve come knowing that noah had expressed some doubts for the record with you during your time together.

while watching the show, you constantly had a feeling that you were being watched…but when you looked up at the stage, you found the front-man of the band gazing off in your direction.

nothing really happened between you two when they were performed besides noah staring at you while singing a couple of songs which you presumed were about you. the rest of the show goes on, you and your friends have the time of your lives screaming your favorite songs on the top of your lungs. when the show was over just as you were about to leave ash, noah’s trainer and bad omens new security caught your attention saying they’d like to invite you backstage so you decide why, not ! after all you and noah are still friends even though he was the only love you regret breaking things off with.

ash guides you in the direction of the Omens’ green room when you notice someone standing in the distance. as you both get closer to the room, you soon realize that this person is actually just noah who asked ash to bring you backstage so the two of you could “catch up.”

which led to noah bringing you back to his hotel room and ending up laying beneath you, fiercely rolling your hips against his with some help provided by him thrusting into you. moans and grunts spill from you guys’ lips, getting closer and closer to your release….right when you grind on his dick hitting your sweet spot perfectly, feeling pure ecstasy wash over the both of you as he holds your hips down so he can fill up your pussy with his cum.

just as noah wakes up in the morning, he remembers everything that happened last night. looking down at you still asleep with the sun peaking through the blinds and shining on your gorgeous face is when the realization hits him…he can’t let you go again.

meanwhile, you just woke up, not really remembering where you were or what happened but when you looked down to see you wearing one of noah’s shirts and then back up to see his smiling handsome face. which brings back all the memories from a few years ago, it felt like nothing changed…”we should talk” breaks you away from your thoughts (aka, regrets for even breaking up with him)…

the conversation ended with you two walking out into the lobby of the hotel they were staying in, holding noah’s hand with the biggest, lovesick smiles on your faces to hear someone yell “FINALLY!” in the distance. (it was a combination of jolly and matt who were celebrating seeing you two together)

[literaphobe]

Michelle!! Happy Birthday!! You said you loved asks so here is an anon ask as a present to you, I hope you have the nicest day with lots of love and cake <3

if you have the time would you talk about what you expect to happen in season 6 of MLB?? And what you WANT to happen??? What's your wishlist!! I know it's supersupersuper early and we have to wait forever but it's fun to speculate, isn't it hehe

I personally hope it'll be the most LadyNoir Season there ever was mostly because I'm still sad that season 5 only had a few crumbs after the first few episodes. And that with Strike Back being the perfect set up!! What the heckie!

omg tysm anon u cutie also YESSS for sure!!!!!!!!

honestly im not too sure what to expect in s6. i find that mlb is a show that is simultaneously predictable and completely unexpected all at the same time. but also its messy. and they like being subversive. but also they dont forget things. but also they take so long to address certain things sometimes that it makes u think they did forget?? (also sometimes they do just forget certain things)

like how they spent s4 driving a wedge between ladynoir and spreading the burden of world-saving up between all their friends and classmates only to cast all the other miraculouses away and make ladynoir need each other more than ever. and then in s5 they kick things off w ladynoir having this tragic love that twists into being so painful that they seek each other out as adrienette and dont even retrieve all the miraculous until the end of the season. and ladynoir gets their feelings just like suppressed and sidelined. but also adrienette meets trouble in their relationship via all the adult disapproval and meddling but by the end they seeeeemingly seem perfect and happy

i feel like the interesting (and fun for me) thing to do with that is to unravel the cracks in their current world. while it seems as though gabriel made a 'good' wish, the fact of the matter remains that wishes should never be made. our protagonists' lives would not be in this state if making a wish did not come with unforeseeable consequences!! i think s6 will show that not all is right with the beautiful world presented at the end of s5, and they've already teased some of that with lila and her acquisition of the butterfly miraculous. obviously, as the two characters that are tortured most by the narrative, adrichat and maribug will face so many consequences of gabriel's lies, notably maribug, because she's helping uphold these false pretenses, because only she knows the full truth

i truly believe that adrien and marinette getting a wonderful lovely fairytale kiss at the end of the season puts them in this light as a loving couple who will never break up. and ive seen speculation that fans think that they would 'never' do that because breaking up would mean that 'love square can never get together post-reveal' which is just. untrue. like they would get over that so easily. even if they revealed right after breaking up. they'd talk it through eventually and realize all the problems their secret identities caused them. also the whole point of this show is that their love is doomed because of said identity secrets soooooo

anyway people have also said adrien would never break up with marinette. i agree. i think she will be the one to do it. like she WOULD break up with him if she thought being with her was dangerous or bad for him or if she plain did not deserve him. she is very much prone to denying herself happiness despite constantly being in pursuit of it. and i think this will happen either mid s6 or at the end of s6

if it doesn't then well... come back and call me a dumbass. but its a 26 episode season and a lot happens in one season when it comes to this show

also i hope giving her classmates/friends all miraculouses backfires. i know in the future they have a full team but besides bunnix (and alya and nino) i feel like a lot of what consists the future team is up in the air. i feel like something regarding holders losing miraculouses or getting their identities compromised in a dangerous way is up in the cards! also, things will happen to the world that feel weird and they'll have to solve it. also, i believe its possible that it will be exposed that a wish was made and ladybug will have to suffer with the consequences of not admitting to the world that a wish was made and that she 'failed' (and chat noir will come to her side and defend her maybe hopefully)

anyway yes. as long as LADYNOIR COMES HOME! i am good and happy. i miss them so s o soosos o so much. again currently it looks like ladynoir has nothing which is why they would probably maybe make their relationship stronger again because it would be subversive. whether people see it coming or not is like. irrelevant i guess? praying we win in s6 anon

[cosmic--marmalade]

Actually no not done about this

I was doing wifey shit, cleaning, cooking, helping him with his resume taking him to and from work, and had been for YEARS

And what did I get out of it? What? Him telling me, and not even to my face, that I wasn't invited to his 50 year grandparents anniversary party? No hugs? No hand holding? Fuck he wouldn't even stand up for me to his cousin who he would drop everything for.

"We don't have feelings for each other like that." IT DOESN'T MATTER!!!! WHEN YOU TWO TREAT EACH OTHER LIKE YOU'RE THE OTHER'S WHOLE WORLD!!!! AND I'M JUST THERE FOR THE RIDE FUCK HE COULDN'T EVEN REMEMBER THE FIRST TIME WE MET WHICH IS WHATEVER BUT MENTIONING EVERY TIME SOMEONE ASKED US HOW WE GOT TOGETHER SUCKED AND GOD ISN'T IT SOOOOOO FUNNY THAT YOU AND CARRIE NEVER MENTIONED HOW BIG OF A BULLY SHW WAS TO YOU GROWING UP WHENEVER SOMEONE ASKED YOU HOW YOU BECAME ROOMMATES F U C K

We took one last road trip, which I got fucked over on because of a bill that I thought had been paid but wasn't fuck I was so stupid, I was a burden the whole fucking time. We went to the west side of the state, the rainforests, for a concert. For the first time in months, he held my hand. Bought me dinner. Got me an early birthday present. He hugged me, held me for more than half a second.

I shouldn't have had to beg for that shit, it shouldn't have taken me paying a medical bill that brought me down to less than $40 in my account for him to do any of that for me.

What's worse is that when the concert happened? He and my supposed best friend, his cousin, ignored me the whole time. Total strangers helped me through a panic attack when the crowd crush got a little intense, one of them even held my hand through the whole thing. They got me water, made sure I was safe to stand, my ex didn't even offer me any of the glowsticks he had been given while standing near the front or even notice I had been crying.

The only time? My ex paid any attention to me was when the opener got into the crowd. I loved his whole vibe, his performance was centered around using our dissatisfaction with the systems we live in to drive us closer together in ways that couldn't be sold back to us. There was a dance circle, appearently I got a mic shoved in my face but I was too busy vibing with this guy to notice. The only time my ex paid attention to me was to ask what it was like, to tell me in detail my own experience back to me. And then suddenly I was invisible again. Knew right then, knew before then too, I had to break up with him. None of what I was being given back was worth it for what I was putting in.

How many times had I been crying on the couch across from him over the years for him not to notice? How many times had I begged him to tell me how he was feeling? How many times did I ask for him to just Go on a walk with me around the complex, but he was too busy waiting for laundry? Always laundry, forever laundry.

The drive home was miserable. They barely noticed me seperating from them to just enjoy the tourist traps at my leisure.

I'm going to be alone on valentines day in a way that will finally make me feel not crazy, because being alone while you're in the same room as someone? Makes you fucking crazy.

[andy-loves-corgis]

All of The Lights - Ch 9 (TRR AU)

Book: The Royal Romance

Pairing: lots of pining.

Rating: M (I can’t make them not curse I guess…).

Word count: ~ 4,000

Notes: I’m a bitch and I have no right to ask for forgiveness, only thank those who are still putting up with my bullshit!

WARNING: Read the Prologue! Every chapter has TWO timelines, Before (about a year before the Prologue) and After (two years after the prologue), if you don’t pay attention to that you might get confused!

Iris

And I would give up forever to touch you

BEFORE

There were voices muffled by the clatter of pans and cutlery at the kitchens, but somehow Savannah’s voice seemed to rise above all the noise pointing at the TV.

“Just look at her.”

Drake did, it was a sequence of pictures from the past couple of weeks, all the royal functions Riley attended alongside Liam, Leo, and Madeleine; the three women on the morning show were analyzing if Riley was there with Liam or just as a maid of honor for Madeleine. In each photo Riley sported her noble grin, he knew it was the fake one because when she smiled fully you could spot the smallest of dimples on her cheeks.

“She looks miserable.” Savannah continued looking for his reaction.

“No, she doesn’t” Drake brushed her off and finished his orange juice in one big gulp before getting up. “Riley is a big girl; she can make her own decisions.”

“Are you going already? I thought you didn’t have classes at all today”

“Well, first…” he kissed the top of her head “… I still work, and Liam texted me to meet him this morning.”

“Oh, because you’re soooooo important!” Savannah laughed rolling her eyes.

Drake pushed another croissant in his mouth and left the kitchens, feeling in the air that the cold was preparing to go away. The competition season would start soon, and he would hate to wake up in the early hours of the morning – as he used to during this events-, to cold weather. He spotted Liam with his black zip-up jacket waiting for him, with a couple of men from the Royal Guard; Drake took his time to pull up the sleeves of his hoodie.

“Hey. Thought you wanted to talk” Drake said greeting his friend.

“I need to blow off some steam, thought it would be good to go for a run. Are you out of shape?” Liam teased.

“As I remember, we did the Army training together, I was the fastest on our squad.”

“Nah, I let you win,” Liam said, and Drake laughed.

“Start running, then. Your highness.” Drake challenged him with a smirk.

After 20 laps, Drake notices signs of fatigue in Liam.

“Come on!” Drake teased, turning on his back but still running ahead of Liam.

“Jesus, what are you made of, Walker?” Liam laughed, throwing his head back almost in exhaustion.

“Whiskey and one-night-stands.” Drake laughed and stopped as soon as they reached their starting point, both leaning on the wall to even their breaths.

“Yeah, about that…” the prince took a big gulp of water from his bottle and turned to his best friend. “What happened at Leo’s bachelor party?”

Drake looked puzzled.

“Did you blackout?”

“No, not at all, actually” Drake knew Liam was trying to keep it cool, but he could see right through him. “You were alone with Riley for some time… did she say anything?”

“Liam, I spend a lot of time alone with Riley, I really can’t see your point…”

“Did something happen?” Liam wasn’t bothering to hide anymore.

Blinking a few times, Drake finally understood where the conversation was heading.

“I won’t bother to answer you, Liam.” Drake stopped leaning on the wall “Riley and I were friends since we were kids.”

“You know she’s completely off-limits, right? Even if we wore broken up, it’s Bro Code.” Liam tried to sound casual.

“Like when you slept with Erika?” the color was drained from Liam’s face when Drake finished his remark.

“You already know what happened” his answer was strained. “She was playing you and took advantage of the fact that I had too much to drink that night after a fight with Riley.”

Drake preferred to believe his longest friend.

“It doesn’t change the fact that I caught both of you naked in bed and never told Riley, that alone could remind you the WE are friends too.” Liam stayed silent after this. “I don’t know if my answer was enough for you, but I have work to do.”

“I… forget what I said, Riley has been weirdly good-behaved, she just makes me unsure…”

“That’s… your problem, Liam.

Drake shrugged and shook his head. He knew he shouldn’t give the literal back to the prince, but it wasn’t like he could handle another minute of awkwardness.

Concentrating was hard in the first hour, he kept reliving the moment where he opened the door of the room Erika was staying, how she was curled up on Liam’s chest. The surprised look on her face, from her to Liam; how she begged for forgiveness.

After three hours he figured he wouldn’t get any work done, so he decided to find Riley and see if she wanted a ride to Valtoria, he was scheduled to select the horses there for the next competition; he wasn’t surprised to find her along with Savannah at the dancing studio.

“I thought I smelled Tiger Balm,” he said as soon as he opened the door. “Should you be doing that already?”

Savannah was sitting on the ground with 3 pairs of ballet shoes and a sewing kit; Riley was right across her in a perfect split.

“You always liked the smell” Riley smiled dodging his question. “See… if you sew an elastic instead of silk, it will allow you more movements.”

“What are all these shoes?” Drake asked.

“Riley gave them to me so I could practice for the presentation” Savannah gave him a toothy grin.

Drake side-eyed Riley, the girl just clenched her jaw, sat back, and got up.

“Oh my, I just forgot I had to meet Maxwell… See you soon, bye!” Savannah exclaimed sensing the change in the atmosphere.

Drake waited until he heard the door closing behind his sister

“We had an agreement on gifts,” he said to her back as she pretended to look for something on her gym bag; he heard the clinking sound of her painkillers shaking in their bottle, she shouldn’t have been training so soon.

A long exhale followed.

“I bought them to myself, but it doesn’t seem like I’m going to wear them anytime soon, does it?” she was in a sour mood grabbing the orange bottle more forcefully than she should.

“I’ll count them as birthday gifts.”

“They are just fucking ballet shoes, Drake!” she turned with her jaw clenched, her blue eyes glimmering. “Helping Savannah is literally the only thing I’m holding onto right now.”

Her fists were balled on the side of her body and her whole frame was slightly shaking.

“Riley” Drake changed to a much softer tone. “Is everything alright?”

She closed her eyes for a second too long.

“Define ‘alright’.”

Drake didn’t say anything else, his hands just circled both of her upper arms and pulled her to his embrace, he felt in his chest as she inhaled and exhaled deeply, containing her tears. Even as a child, Riley hated crying in front of anyone.

“Hey, New York is just around the corner, ok?” Drake said and a sob escaped her mouth. “Soon you’ll be oceans away.”

Her sobbing was uncontrollable now.

“I’m not going.” Her voice was muffled by his chest.

“Wait… what happened?” he took a step back and his heart clenched at the sight of her watery eyes.

“I burned my acceptance letter two weeks ago, it was just bullshit, Drake. Everyone knows I can’t escape this place.” She forcefully wiped a tear that rolled down her cheek.

A small part of him, a part he would hardly acknowledge, was relieved to hear she wasn’t leaving; although, there was another part of him that was dying to see her like that. He always imagined Riley as an exotic bird inside a golden cage.

“You shouldn’t have done that!” he pulled her back to his arms and kissed the top of her head. “Things are going to be fine; I can’t tell you how, but they will, even if I have to make them be, ok?”

She sniffed on his chest.

“´k”

“Hey, let me take you back to Valtoria tonight, I’m headed there anyway” he moved back just a little to see her quickly drying her eyes.

“Yeah, that would be good, thanks.” She gave him a small smile.

“Be ready at 6 pm”

Drake left the room with a strange feeling at the pit of his stomach. Getting back to his office, he tried to concentrate on the paperwork for the next competition; stopping a little early than 6, he scrolled through his Instagram and something caught his attention, a smile spread on his face as he realized how he could lift Riley’s mood.

For some unknown reason, his legs were shaking while he waited for her outside his truck, it got worse once he saw her leaving the castle, wearing just jeans and no makeup on.

“Ready?” she asked, she sounded a little more cheerful than in the afternoon.

“Yeah” he opened the door and helped her hop in his Silverado.

As he drove far from the palace she seemed to relax, even more, concentrated on the changing blue sky as the night fell.

“We’ll need to stop somewhere first…” Drake started uncertain, regretting his words as soon as he said them.

“Where are we going?” she looked at him puzzled. “Are you gonna kill me and dispose of my body in the woods?”

Drake rolled his eyes and threw his cellphone on her lap.

“Sometimes I think I should…” he joked but stopped to study her face as a crease appeared between her brows.

“Are you serious?” she looked at him suspiciously. “Is this a prank? You would NEVER do this…”

“I can head right to Valt…”

“NO NO, we’re going” she reached for the steering wheel.

“You’re a danger even in the passenger seat, York” Drake pretended to slap her hand; he couldn’t help but smile at her excitement.

He parked his truck in front of the Wood Wheel and Riley hopped off the car like a child anxious to get into the park.

“Am I allowed to record?” she asked grinning.

“No” he stated, pulling his guitar from behind his seat. “I’m only doing this because I hate owing you.”

“Whatever you say, Walker…”

Getting inside, they were welcomed by the smell of Al’s greasy fries, loud chatter, and someone finishing a song on the makeshift stage at the right corner.

“Look if it isn’t my favorite costumer and again, he brought his girl that knows how to drink.” Al greeted them from the counter.

“Al doesn’t understand the term ‘friends’” he threw Riley an unapologetic look and she shrugged, making a beeline to the bar and grabbing a glass of wine for her and whisky for him.

“Drake’s gonna sing today!” Riley stated excited sitting on the stool.

“Oh, is he?” Al looked at him puzzled as Drake rested his guitar on the floor.

“I lost a bet” he mumbled grabbing his glass.

Al snorted, cleaning another glass.

“I have a free slot in half an hour, I’ll be waiting” Al mocked him.

After his second glass, he felt more at ease, especially after watching Riley chat cheerfully with Al, the remnants of her sadness not showing anymore.

“Ohhhh, it’s your turn, I’m so excited! I’ll get to check another one of the items on my bucket list for this year!” Riley clapped unable to contain her excitement.

Drake exhaled loudly and turned to grab his guitar when he felt Riley’s small hands on his biceps.

“Hey” her voice was hoarse, maybe for all the wine, she was drinking. “It’s going to be great.”

“It’s pretty packed, isn’t it?” Drake averted his eyes to all the occupied tables in front of the stage.

“It doesn’t matter, pretend it’s just us. Like we’ve done a hundred times”

He nodded and gulped despite all the encouragement from Riley.

Trying not to look at anyone on the tables, he silently sat on the stool with his guitar and adjusted his microphone.

“Hum, hello everyone. My name is Drake and I lost a bet.” The crowd laughed and brown eyes met ocean blue.

With a sigh, his fingers hit the strings.

I've been roaming around Always looking down at all I see Painted faces, fill the places I can't reach

You know that I could use somebody You know that I could use somebody

Someone like you, and all you know, and how you speak

 He tried to focus solely on his fingers hitting the strings, the hot light above him, muffling any sound of the crowd singing along, or the way his heart skipped a beat by his unconscious choice of song.

 Off in the night, while you live it up, I'm off to sleep Waging wars to shape the poet and the beat I hope it's gonna make you notice I hope it's gonna make you notice

Someone like me

 Although it wasn’t a matter of someone, more of a matter of somewhere, some other reality, because, in this one, this was just a song, it had to be just a song.

Drake finished the last notes with everyone in the bar singing along and clapping after he finished, completely flushed, and not from his whiskey.

“You were AMAZING!” Riley almost shrieked in excitement. “this was the best night EVER! God, I want to pee… wait a minute and we can go.”

Riley didn’t let him say anything before rushing to the bathroom.

“Your girlfriend is something else!” Al laughed pouring him some whisky.

“I’ve already told you, she’s not my girlfriend.” He drank half of his shot in a big gulp.

“Ok, but have you told her?” Al looked at him mischievously. “Because she was sitting right there where you are, looking at you like a lost puppy crazy to follow you home.”

“She’s not remotely interest… Hey York! Should we go?”

Riley was back with a half-drunk smile.

“Sure!”

The ride to Valtoria was peaceful, a recomforting silence with the radio buzzing old songs while Riley closed her eyes feeling the chilly night air on her face.

Drake parked his car on the west wing of her estate, where she could get inside by the kitchen door and he would be just a short walk from the staff’s rooms. He made sure to help her out of the car, not prepared to be that close to her.

“Thank you for this night” her voice was above a whisper.

“That’s what best friends are for” he winked and for a split of a second, he thought he saw her smile falter.

“Yeah you’re a great friend” she kissed his cheek for a second too long. “Good night, Drake.”

“Good night, Riley.”

He watched as she moved towards the entrance, turning to glance at him before entering, a pang in his chest hit him heard. He hoped he was having a heart attack.

AFTER

“No! You’re not putting any animal down without me saying so!” Drake almost shouted on the phone, Yanis, one of his assistants pretended he wasn’t witnessing the awkward moment. “You’re going to wait for me to get there then we talk. Bye!”

Drake almost threw his phone on the table and exhaled loudly.

“Sorry to keep you waiting, what happened?”

Yanis fidgeted on his seat.

“Hum, Lady Riley was here a while ago, she said she needed some files”

Shit, he forgot to hand them to her.

“Damn, if you see her, tell her I’ll have them delivered to her quarters today.

“She actually asked you to meet her at 3 pm, somewhere called South Wing.”

“Yeah, ok, anything else?” the boy just shook his head and got up as fast as he could.

Drake exhaled again; he didn’t want to scare the boy. He was one of the good ones sent from the company that now took care of the Royal horses.

He remembered how was to enter his office again after everything happened. Drake actually couldn’t remember how one thing led to another; how coming back from the hospital turned to join the taskforce against The Sons of Earth, then sharing a whiskey with Liam when they finally caught the bastards. Applying again for his job as an official Royal Veterinarian, now to a company, not Liam.

Everything got back to normal. Then she came back.

He gave up on his report and decided to do some handwork to pass the time.

 Riley’s back came into view as soon as his feet reached the grass; she seemed too absorbed by the view in front of her to notice Drake getting closer.

“Hey,” he said, and she was startled by his voice.

“Ohmygod… sorry, my mind was elsewhere.” She shook her head.

He followed her eyes to the window, they were facing the south wing of the castle, right beside the grand ballroom, the wing housed the conservatory and a dance studio, where right now a bunch of noble preteens were having a ballet class.

“Do you still dance?” Drake caught himself asking.

Riley chuckled and shook her head.

“I don’t dance at all.”

“At all? I pretty much saw you waltzing a couple of times since you came back.” She turned her head to face him and gave him half a smile.

“Waltzing is like shaking hands, you do it because you have to.”

“So, you’re telling me that you haven’t gone out clubbing in NY?” Drake questioned almost amused.

“Well, it was considered risky behavior for a person like me” she let the sentence hang in the air. “But yeah, I barely danced two songs in the past two years.” She shrugged like it was no big deal.

Drake stayed silent for long seconds, thinking through the sentence he wanted to say.

“You should do it; I know there’s a part of you dying to.”

He didn’t mean it to sound so personal, he just couldn’t help it; Riley blushed and looked at her feet before clearing her throat.

“Did you get her last address?” she changed the subject.

“Oh yeah, here it is” he offered her a folder with the little information he had gathered on Savannah’s whereabouts. “you’re not paying anything for it, right?”

“No, I beat up a PI at poker in New York and he owed me a favor for letting him go in his car.” She laughed to herself.

“Why does this story sound so much like bullshit?”

“His name is Damien Nazario, he was there with his girlfriend and another weird couple, you can look up for him online.” She smirked, “And for the record, I’m really good at poker.”

“So… poker wasn’t risky behavior?”

“We need to beat our vices one at a time, Walker” she laughed a little more truthfully. “So… that was another thing I wanted to talk to you about.”

Drake tensed.

“I went to the Wood Wheel yesterday and ended up bumping on Cassidy” Drake’s stomach clenched and Riley blushed from the awkwardness of the situation “Sorry, I didn’t know she was your girlfriend, she seems really nice though… hum, I obviously didn’t say anything and…”

She started twisting her fingers.

“And…?”

Riley sighed and leaned on the window,

“Look, I know it’s too much to ask, but no one never knew we were together…” it was almost painful to have the words together thrown at him. “well, aside from some people in the court… but, we could pretend it never happened so I wouldn’t lose my favorite bar.”

“You want me to lie to my girlfriend?” Drake rose a brow to her.

“No, I’m just asking for you not to blatantly tell her” he held his gaze on her shameful eyes. “Look, Wood Wheel is the only place I can drink without being bothered by people knowing me or paparazzi showing up. If she asks you, you do what you want to do, but think for a moment that we can bury whatever happened to us and just move on. This is the perfect chance.”

Whatever happened to us. Ouch.

“Okay… It’s not like I would want her to find out.”

Riley nodded not looking directly at him.

“Well… I got to go and email this stuff to Damien; I’ll tell you as soon as he gives me a lead.” Riley tried to brush off the awkwardness with a half-smile.

“Okay” Drake silently answered.

Returning to his office he got his phone back, noticing there were a couple of calls from Cassidy.

“Hey, Cass,” he said as soon as she picked up.

“Hey, Drake! How’s your day going?”

“Pretty normal, how about you?”

“Well…” she started and he heard the sound of the pans behind her. “the Chef is a little moody today, but the movement is low, not many tourists, so I’m now consuming Cordonian gossip.

“Oh… why?”

“I mean, in Greece we don’t have an ‘active’ Royal Family, sometimes I even forgot they existed, but here they are like celebrities.”

“Hum” Drake huffed not wanting to get to this conversation so soon. “Most of them are just assholes with money.”

“About that… Is ‘Lady Bitch’ related to Riley York?”

There it was.

“Yes, she’s her mother. Why?”

“Oh, I met Lady Riley yesterday… at Wood Wheel.” She finished like it was a surprise to find the noble there. “It seems like Al knows her, he even let her go out for a smoke with a glass on her hands.”

“I saw her there a couple of times in the past, before…. The whole thing”

Before I pulled her half-dead body from the ocean.

“Do you know her? She dated Prince Liam, you’re friends with him, right?”

“Yeah, I know her, everyone kind of know each other, is a small circle.”

That was safe.

“Hope she comes back to the bar when is our night, she looks like she tips well.” She laughed and he tried to follow. “Oh, I gotta go, Matt is calling me. Bye!”

“Bye…”

The rest of his shift was spent reliving the conversation.

He exhaled loudly. Drake didn’t like lying, and it felt like he was lying all the time, even if Cassidy would never think about Riley and him being anything but acquaintances; if he was being true to himself, he had been feeling close to suffocating ever since Riley came back, things were simpler then, now everything was gray, except for one of those exotic blue-ish flowers that always caught his eyes on the way back to his room.

Not even the chilly air of the garden was calming his nerves, then he noticed a light that wasn’t supposed to be there, the south wing was usually dark by that time at night, the only other times he recalled someone using it at was way back…

When Riley still danced.

He stopped dead in tracks near the window, watching as she executed a triple spin, only to stumble on her feet; he could see her frustration, her brows joined as some strands of hair fell from her bun to her face. Giving up, she sat on the floor and started to untie her shoes, she gave a long sigh when the music coming from the speakers changed drastically.

The sweet strings from Dramarama’s cover filled the room; she looked as surprised as him, they used to hear that song at full volume in his car right when he started driving. Now barefoot on the wooden floor, she got up and started to shake her shoulders timidly, then her hips followed… her legs and her arms.

 Do you wanna eat? Do you wanna sleep? Do you wanna drown?

Just settle down, settle down, settle down.

I’ll give you candy, give you diamonds, give you pills

I’ll give you anything you want. Hundred-dollar bills.

The song related morbidly to her, but it seemed to give her strength, totally lost on the beat; jumping around and biting her lips she untied her hair and let it fall loose shaking her head.

It was when a full-blown smile took over her face, with dimples and all.

Seeing those little dimples on the corner of her mouth as she smiled to the roof with her head thrown back, swaying hips and arms, he remembered why storms were named after people.

.

I just love you guys!

@saivilo​; @kimmiedoo5​; @pug-bitch​; @bee1arw​; @laurmillen​; @axwalker​​; @world-of-dreams-and-muse​; @rtinaz​​; @iplaydrake​​; @notoriouscs​​; @mind-reader1​​; @annekebbphotography​​; @walkerismychoice​​;  @tmarie82; @blackwidow2721; @thequeenchoices; @missameliep; @jovialyouthmusic; @perksof-everything; @choicesmacmakes; @carabeth @drakenazario; @drakesensworld; @moneyfordiamonds; @ao719; @lynne1993; @ilovedrakewalker23; @msjpuddleduck; @drakewalkerisreal; @violinist3121; @wannabemc2; @gibbles82; @furiousherringoperatortoad; @jens-diamondchoices; @rainbowsinthestorm​; @fromthedeskofpaisleybleakmore; @emceesynonymroll; @addictedtodrakefanfic; @texaskitten30; @dcbbw; @i-bloody-love-drake-walker; @mom2000aggie;

[foxymoxynoona]

Okay, I’m done reading. Had to take a break because IT WAS TOO MUCH TO HANDLE.

Eyebrow anon, you can keep your eyebrows. I never thought I would be this happy about saying this😭😭

But before starting, to respond to an ask I sent you in these last few days: is it you son’s birthday? Happy birthday baby Foxy! Little Libra like our Jimin?🥺🥺 and new job, congrats if it’s something that makes you happy!❤️

Okay, onto Amended.

I was still kind of jungshook from last chapter too because I felt like watching one of those movies in which you see the two characters growing up together and slowly falling for each other. Bonus point: my tiktok has exploded with Adele’s “When we were young” so GREAT TIMING.

I was honestly expecting the sequel of the flashbacks but then I saw Bella freaking out while going to the hospital and I was like OKAY BACK TO THE PRESENT I WAS NOT READY. Which made me wonder: will we ever see the rest of it?🧐

It was soooooo heartbreaking, all of it. And the fact that we went from “no I love yous but different love language” to ��so many I love yous but jk doesn’t even remember them” is top tier comedy. Maybe not as much as JK pissing on Bella, but I have a feeling Otto from Meadow would be kind of proud. Reminiscing the good old days😂

Now can we talk about the fact that this line

“We grew up but so did the way I love you.”

broke me???? In case I don’t see you, good afternoon good evening and good night 😀😀😀🔪🔪🔪

This chapter made me sad even if it was kind of happy overall. I know it’s not the last one but it felt like it, I just realized I’m not ready to let go of this story😭😭 I’m having abandonment issues with your fic too, help me!😭

🌸

It was my younger son's birthday earlier this week, yes! We just celebrated as our little family but he got lots of Luigi stuff so he's happy.

And yes too to the job, thanks! It's a freelance editing job for a big company! So I get to try out editing as a full career before I make any big moves. I'm nervous and excited!

Hm, the flashbacks, yessss I've been looking forward to those for a long time. For a while I had contemplated never having the flashbacks in the story, and just posting them as little side drabbles, but I ultimately decided I wanted to weave them in this way. It's obvious that JK and Isabella need to work through their history and have been reluctant to do so. In this instance, external factors busting down their walls around their early years allowed those memories to break out.

I suspect something will force them to work through the teen years too, yes 😉

"We grew up but so did the way I love you.” I'm so glad you love this line. it got added during editing, so it really was just feeling that got it added in! Once the story is over, you will be able to really chart JK's feelings for Bella through all the kinds of love, including selfish love and resentful love and so on.

[strayen-fx]

Happy Birthday, I guess

Pairing: Han Jisung x reader

Genre: Fluff

Word count: 1k

Summary: You hate birthdays. On top of it all, you hate celebrating your own birthday. But your best friend, Han Jisung, apparently has some other plan in mind.

[A/N] It's not my first time writing an au but it IS my first time posting one... So please bear with me ㅠㅠㅠㅠ Feedbacks will be greatly appreciated. Thank you!!! (Also, I got inspired to write this since my bday was just a few days ago. Hahaha!) ENJOY!!! 💙

"Why do you hold such a big grudge against birthdays?"

I chuckled humorlessly, attacking the slice of cheesecake Jisung has bought for me ("I gave up my daily dose of cheesecake for you," he said. "You're that special to me.") It was his birthday present, he declared, stubbornly dragging me to the café he frequents despite me telling him not to bother.

Needless to say, I hate the idea of "celebrating" birthdays.

"One: it's a total crap. Why would you celebrate the day you're turning older?" I began explaining. "Two: it's just an excuse for people to talk you into buying food for them. And I'm totally broke." I remembered the merchandise I ordered last week -- they will probably show up at my door tomorrow.

I never really enjoyed my birthdays. Well, I guess at some point I did. But as I grew older, I just lost the fun and excitement of adding a year to my age. It gradually lost its significance, until it became nothing more but another day I had to get through in my life. (Maybe the fact that exams usually fall on my birth date doesn't help with my case.)

"Well, I'm the one treating you food," Jisung pointed out, sipping his iced americano.

I smiled from ear to ear. "And that is precisely why you are my best friend."

He stopped mid-sip and pouted. "Sometimes I wonder if I'm only your best friend because you get free foods all the time."

I giggled, reaching across the table to pinch his chubby cheeks. Why does this man have to be so freaking cute all the time.

He swatted my hand jokingly, still pouting. "We have classes in half an hour, so don't take your sweet time, birthday girl," he reminded me.

I groaned in disapproval, fake-glaring at him through munching at my cake.

"Okay, okay." His face broke into a grin. "Hurry up, not-birthday-girl."

○○○○○○○○○

We had an early dismissal -- our maths prof was absent, what a miracle -- and I was hoping to sleep through the remaining hours of the day. The moment I opened the door to my apartment, however, I immediately knew that I wasn't getting what I wanted.

For one, it wasn't in my plan to hear kitchen utensils falling over in the kitchen. I was already prepared to scream bloody murder to whoever broke into my house, until the smell of something burnt wafted over me.

I walked over to the kitchen and saw Jisung hunched over the stove, attempting to salvage whatever it was that he attempted to concoct on the pan.

I cleared my throat, and Jisung finally realized that I was there. His cheeks flushed into a deep shade of pink as he attempted to hide the traces of his failed cooking.

"I-I was just--"

"Just trying to burn my house, Han Jisung?" I asked, suppressing my laughter.

He pouted, embarrassed for getting caught red-handed and for royally failing to surprise me with his dishes. He really has to stop with that adorable pout of his. He's making my heart do somersaults.

I walked over to him, pulling him into a tight hug.

"I appreciate the gesture, Ji. You already treated me earlier, you didn't have to do this for me."

He hugged me back, playing with my hair as he was doing so. "I just hate the fact that you can't even enjoy the day of your birth. Like, I get it -- you don't want any celebration. But I want you to at least have some healing and relaxing time."

I giggled against his chest, playfully slapping his arm. "I can't exactly relax with my apartment burning, Ji."

"I know." I can practically hear the pout in his voice.

I broke from the hug, offering him a reassuring smile. "Let's order some pizza, yeah? And tteokbokki. I'm starving."

Jisung grinned sheepishly. "Let me fix my mess first. I may have broken a bowl or two."

○○○○○○○○○

The night turned into a movie date with my best friend. Pulling my "it's-my-birthday" card, I forced Jisung into watching two horror movies back-to-back. After what seemed like our fourth box of pizza (and Ji's 1000th scream), I finally allowed Jisung to pick the next movie. He chose a fluffy romcom, which made me feel warm and cosy and generally sleepy. I leaned against Jisung as soon as the movie started, my head resting against his shoulder. He promptly brought his arm around my waist, pulling me closer to him. He felt like home. He smelled like all the sweetest things in the world.

I can feel his heart thumping fast against his chest. The rhythmic pattern was strangely comforting, like an ensemble creating a melodic symphony. It made my heart beat abnormally fast -- I'm pretty sure my ears are now burning red.

I guess it's the pizza overdose, or maybe the sudden calmness of the night, or maybe its the conflicting feeling in my chest that made me feel so sentimental. Halfway through the film, I snuggled closer to Jisung's chest, hugging him tight and letting myself relax into his hold.

"Jisungie," I whispered.

"Hmm?"

"Thank you."

There was a momentary pause, and I can imagine him smiling as he leaned his head against mine.

"I never thought I could enjoy my birthday this much," I continued. "You never fail to make me feel so happy just by being there. I seriously can't imagine a life without you. Thank you, Ji."

I then detached myself from him. He looked confused and undeniably, annoyingly cute. I couldn't stop myself -- I kissed his cheek right where it was the chubbiest: that spot I have always been dreaming to kiss. That left him wide-eyed and surprised, which was so, soooooo cute, that I wasn't able to stop myself. I was basically throwing caution right outside the door, but who cares?

My lips brushed against my best friend's lips.

I looked up at him right after, trying to read his expression. The silence was getting too heavy for me to bear. I was starting to think: That did it. Now Jisung will think I am no different from the many fangirls who try to get close to him just for their ulterior motives. (Yeah, maybe my thoughts are that exaggerated, but how the hell am I gonna think otherwise?)

Suddenly, Jisung's lips broke into a huge smile, his eyes reduced into crescents. He held my cheeks and pulled me close, his soft lips pressing passionately against mine.

Maybe celebrating birthdays isn't so bad, after all.

[readyforit]

I JUST GOT AN ELECTRIC GUITAR

GUYS I’M GOING TO SCREAM

[never-not-ever]

It’s 6pm and I feel like I’ve been going nonstop all day ¿¿

Jett was meowing this morning and so I went out in the living room with him so my girlfriend could sleep since she had to work and I have no life and don’t really care about sleep (except last night when I ranted on here about her interrupting my sleep lol). I was gonna try to sleep on the couch this morning but then said fuck it and decided to just start my day early. So I took a shower and apparently my brain wasn’t awake yet cause I put conditioner in my hair before washing out the shampoo. I was gonna skip a shower since I thought I was just running errands with my Nana all day but we now have plans to go out tonight with friends so I’m glad I actually look like a presentable human being. Even though she was bitchy last night I woke up in a good mood so I packed her lunch and made her breakfast. Then I straightened my hair and put on some makeup to try to look like a (kinda) pretty human being.

I dropped her at work and then picked up my Nana to run our errands. We went to Panera for lunch and I got my favorite asian sesame chicken salad. Then I picked up a few things in Target and got a giftcard from Total Wine and headed in town to this amazing coffee shop to get another giftcard. It’s our friends birthday today the liquor store is from her (along with Wine-Opoly and the coffee shop is from me (along with a mug and ground coffee from said coffee shop). 

Soooooo after the coffee shop I stopped by my old job to get a one nights supply of seroquel since my doctor hasn’t gotten back to my request for a refill yet. It was like a legal drug deal lmao my friend who works in the pharmacy came out to the car (bless her soul for not making me go inside) and I brought her a coffee and she gave me the magic little pills that will help me sleep tonight.

After that I dragged my Nana with me back to my apartment so I could grab a change of clothes for my girlfriend (the plans tonight weren’t definite this morning) and her insulin and I told my Nana she could come up to see her fur-grandbabies as long as she doesn’t judge my messy cluttered apartment. She hasn’t seen them since October when she watched them while we were in London. 

After that we had to run 2 last errands. To save time I dropped her at Home Depot and then I went across to Market Basket to do her food shopping. Then we headed back to her house where I’m doing her laundry and relaxing while I wait for my girlfriend to get out at 8. We’re meeting up with 2 friends (one is the birthday boy lol) at some gay bar in town that has a patio open for social distancing. I already made it known that I’m going to be the DD so I’m not drinking but I’ll probably talk to them later about my real reasoning for not drinking. 

The. End. 

[notalk-justthought]

( ͡° ͜ʖ ͡°)

Hehe okay originally I was gonna answer these in an audio post, and I did that, then it turned out to be very quiet and it was 15 minutes of me being awkward af and fully answering like 15 questions soooooo yeah

1: Talk about the first time you watched your favorite movie. 

one of my favorite movies is Train to Busan and I thought it was gonna be a regular zombie movie, but I ended up crying at the end,,, I wasn’t ready

2: Talk about your first kiss. 

I can’t cuz it hasn’t happened yet :I

3: Talk about the person you’ve had the most intense romantic feelings for. 

uhhh there’s like two people? but the first one was a crush in 6th grade so maybe it wasn’t really love? idk, then the last one was like last year,,, the 6th grade crush was on this guy I had known since elementary school and idk why I had a crush on him, but 11 year old me liked him,,, but now he’s engaged which is wack cuz we’re both in our early 20s…. then the most recent crush where I had intense feelings for,,, she a gay meme,,,,ye

4: Talk about the thing you regret most so far. 

one thing that I regret so far in my life is my first relationship for a couple reasons….

5: Talk about the best birthday you’ve had.

OH MY GOD my 15th birthday was lit, so my bro invited like 3 of his friends over (my bday in July 4th) and one of his friends brought those fireworks that shoot off into the sky then explode and it was awesome

6: Talk about the worst birthday you’ve had.

I can’t think of a bad birthday, they just kinda happen lmao

7: Talk about your biggest insecurity.

uhhh tbh I can’t think of my biggest insecurity right now

8: Talk about the thing you are most proud of.

I’m proud of living this far in life 

9: Talk about little things on your body that you like the most.

I have like freckles on various places of my body, there’s like 5-10 of them,,, uhh I have this cool birthmark on my finger that’s cool idk what else

10: Talk about the biggest fight you’ve ever had.

I don’t get into fights

11: Talk about the best dream you’ve ever had.

Already answered

12: Talk about the worst dream you’ve ever had.

where I either died or was being stalked

13: Talk about the first time you had sex/how you imagine your first time.

my first time is gonna be awkward, I can guarantee that

14: Talk about a vacation.

I went to puerto rico this past summer and it was nice, we stayed in airbnbs, drank a few mojitos, swam in the ocean, saw a lotta cats, dogs, and horses… it was nice.

15: Talk about the time you were most content in life.

uhhhh idk probably like 6th grade lmao

16: Talk about the best party you’ve ever been to.

HOKAY SO this was after volunteering at this camp I had been volunteering at for the past couple years (this was two summers ago) and my bro gets invited to the end of the summer party with the rest of day camp and took me with him. so we went, we played some beer games, had pizza, had snacks and whatnot and it was just a fun time… okay that’s the ONLY party i’ve been to

17: Talk about someone you want to be friends with.

I wanna be friends with this one girl who lives across the hall from me, we have talked once because we have a mutual friend, but she seems cool

18: Talk about something that happened in elementary school.

already answered

19: Talk about something that happened in middle school.

a lot of shit happened in middle school,,,, there was this one guy I knew who wanted to be a werewolf, I balanced a bunch of stuff on my head, i had mini crushes on girls I didn’t realize were mini crushes, shit was wild

20: Talk about something that happened in high school.

there was this one time during 11th grade in chorus class where the alto section was talking about how weird nipples are right? so when we were practicing going on stage for the chorus concert and such and we were backstage, one of my friends was like “hey do you wanna see how weird my nipple is?” and I was like “sure!” and then she showed me her boob,,, it was a gay time

21: Talk about a time you had to turn someone down.

I turned down my friend once when he asked me cuz I didn’t like him

22: Talk about your worst fear.

one of my worst fears is being alone, like romantic wise,,, 

23: Talk about a time someone turned you down.

I’ve never been turned down because I’ve never asked anyone out,,,, okay I GUESS I did kinda ask this one girl to pride, but she agreed….HOLY SHIT that was a date…. I’m so dumb,,,

24: Talk about something someone told you that meant a lot.

My friend Daria sometimes writes little letters to me when we give each other presents and it’s about how grateful she is to have me as a friend, and it always means a lot

25: Talk about an ex-best friend.

there was this one friend I had and we were friends since like 6th grade and we were in so many classes together and we were both into anime and idk it was a fun time, i mean, online, it would seem like we’re still friends since we like each other’s insta posts and say happy birthday to each other still… her birthday is coming up… idk it’s weird cuz we haven’t talked since the beginning of our last year of highschool

26: Talk about things you do when you’re sick.

I do the same things I do when I procrastinate, listen to music, watch youtube, sleep yknow. also I only get sick like 2-3 times a year soooo

27: Talk about your favorite part of someone else’s body.

uhhhhhh my friend Daria has nice thighs,,,,

28: Talk about your fetishes.

UHHHHHH no

29: Talk about what turns you on.

………….imma name two,,,, neck kisses and dirty talk……

30: Talk about what turns you off.

cigarette smoke, mean personalities,,, other stuff I can’t think of

31: Talk about what you think death is like.

already answered!

32: Talk about a place you remember from your childhood.

I remember my mom, bro, dog, and I would take walks to the lake where the town gets water from and such and when we’d get there, Sam would start climbing up this steep hill with his climbing gear and our dog would sniff around,,, we haven’t done that in years…

33: Talk about what you do when you are sad.

cry or talk to myself about why I’m sad/crying

34: Talk about the worst physical pain you’ve endured.

foot cramps, but now I’ve had so many that it doesn’t hurt that much :/

35: Talk about things you wish you could stop doing.

I wish I could stop procrastinating, I’d get so much done and be so much happier

36: Talk about your guilty pleasures.

I like watching anime abridged series a lot,,,

37: Talk about someone you thought you were in love with.

First, what is love? lmao second, uhhh I don’t think I’ve been in love? idk

38: Talk about songs that remind you of certain people.

I can’t think of songs, but certain bands remind me of people, like The Growlers remind me of my friend Audra, MCR reminds me of my friend Ellie, Rainbow Kitten Surprised reminds me of my bro

39: Talk about things you wish you’d known earlier.

uhhh how to study is one of them, time management is another

40: Talk about the end of something in your life.

the end of me thinking about the bad things that happened in my relationship/friendship with my ex was really freeing, like knowing that what caused that was both of us was good to know and it was definitely a turning point. I literally didn’t stop thinking about it until I figured out it was both of us who did each other wrong. I’m glad that I did cuz that would’ve held over me for even longer.

[writerlys]

✤ robily

I am uhhh how you say: Madly In Love with Them and this was SO MUCH FUN!!! I just realized we’re the trash puppies and we’re back AND robbie is a vet so MAYBE HE CAN CURE US OF OUR TRASHNESS!!!

who said i love you first? oooh this is HARD. my instinct is to say lily because she’s such a hopeless romantic but she’s also SO scared that she’s more into him than he is into her so I feel like it would be him. she’d probably feel it soooooo early though and know for sure that she loved him but would just be terrified to say it!

who laughs when the other trips? robbie EASILY. I doubt lily trips a lot bc she’s so coordinated so when it happens he probably can’t help himself. but he also definitely catches her every time. lily probably also laughs when he trips and then makes some comment about how it’s a long trip down for him LOL.

who pays the bills? I’m sure robbie pays his bills like a Normal Functioning Adult but I feel like when they get together it’ll be lily!

which one makes a bigger deal around the holidays? HMM this is tough. I feel like neither? like maybe robbie’s parents would be big on traditional chinese holidays and lily’s would be big on stuff like christmas and thanksgiving but I feel like the two of them are more the type to make a big deal about like... birthdays, anniversaries, that sort of stuff. robbie def remembers every day that’s ever meant something to them but doesn’t make a big deal out of it and lily def goes all out with her presents (but probably wouldn’t remember like, the first time they hung out on the bleachers together or went to the movies together or something like that)!!

who’s more clumsy? neither really?? like he’s so coordinated bc basketball and she’s so coordinated bc dance? BUT I can see robbie pretending to be clumsy just to get a laugh out of her 🥺

who checks their daily horoscope? lily would be the one to do this just to poke fun at him and I guarantee she’s rolled her eyes and gone “you are such a leo” when robbie does things JUST to annoy him.

who sings louder in the car? robbie!!! lily likes to sing but she’s super self conscious so he probably has to sing first and then get her to loosen up a bit.

who leaves the cap off the toothpaste? robbie and lily probably grumbles about it but closes it and then doesn’t say anything.

who is more up to date in pop culture? robbie because of sports tbh! I also feel like he’s probably much more popular on social media whereas lily will post a picture of like, her at dance practice once every four months KSJDFHD.

who insists on going to see the newest movies? lily!!! she most certainly drags him to all the new animated movies and they are def the only two adults in the theater without kids. though she also probably sees movies and is like “jeremy you’d like this!!” and goes to see those with him too 🤧

who cries when the abused animal commercials come on? BOTH OF THEM. HOW IS THIS EVEN A QUESTION. SHE IS A SENTIENT PILE OF MUSH AND HE IS A VET WITH A HEART OF GOLD. BOTH. OF. THEM.

who’s the lighter sleeper? I feel like robbie bc lily sleeps fairly well and is probably out like a light the second she’s in his arms. like has definitely fallen asleep on him multiple times while they’ve watchd movies and doesn’t stir one bit when he picks her up and tucks her into bed.

who believes in ghosts? lily because she believes in everything and apologizes when she runs into doors bc she thinks all inanimate things have souls. for SURE lily.

who does the grocery shopping? I think they go together but when they don’t, robbie would for sure be the one to go and not even make a big fuss about it and then lily would be like “... wait, wasn’t I out of this?” and would then realize he went and would MELT. BYE!!!

who updates their facebook status more often? def don’t think either of them have facebook but for sure robbie is more active on social media bc he’s Hot and has to Keep Up with the other Hot People!

[gilrlikegirl]

Thoughts

Buckle up y'all this is gonna be a lonnggg one.

I know that I truly love her because she hurt me on a whole another level and I still love her. I have a right to be mad at her, but I’m not. I “should be” speaking poorly of her, but I’m not, I only speak positively about her. I could have flipped out on her, but I didn’t, I don’t want to, I see no need to. I could be the most bitter thing towards her, but I’m not, I don’t want to be, I let her go knowing that I love her and I always will, she will always have someone to turn to. I could have left her before she got the chance to leave me, but I didn’t, I gave her the decision, because if it was up to me we would be in each other’s lives forever. I want her to be free, I want her to be happy, I want her to know that she matters, I want her to know she is so dearly loved, I want her to know she is so incredibly unique and special, I want her to know I will always love her, I want her to know that my arms will always be wide open for her, I want her to know that I have yet to find anything that compares to her, I want her to know that she is so valued, I want her to know that there will always be a spark of love in my heart for her, I want her to know that I love all of her, even though I don’t know every single detail of her life, I see who she is because of it, she is strong and beautiful and so gentile and she has been hurt, I can see those parts of her and I love her. I don’t only love her because she is the most beautiful girl I’ve ever seen, I loved her because she was raw, she had such spark about certain things, she understood, she listened, she was patient, she had a way with words, she could make me melt in a single sentence, she worked so hard, she made me feel like I mattered to someone, to at least her and that is all I needed in life, she gave purpose to life, she saw the beauty of things and the sad side of things, her mind took a while to learn, but once I got a drift of how it worked I fell in love, she has so much genuine love for her pets, she was true, she was the definition of cuteness, she was such a goofball, she had sass, she changed me, she made me happy, she made me smile, she made me cry, she made me sad. She was the only person I let my walls down for. I gave her my heart and forever I think she will have it, maybe one day it won’t be all of it, but she will always have the majority of it. I wanted to know all of her. I wanted to know her full story of life. I wanted to know why she is the person she is, I wanted to understand her in a way that no one had before, I wanted to be the one for her, I wanted to know all major events of her life, all the little ones too, I wanted to know the little things that she loved, the tiny facts that no one pays attention to, I wanted to truly know her, I wanted to feel her pain and joy, I wanted to know her favorite memories and her least favorite, I wanted to know her favorite thing about herself, I wanted to know her least favorite thing about herself. I wanted her to know I would love her no matter what. I wanted to spoil her, I wanted to take her on dates, I wanted to love her in her best and worst moments, I wanted to take her places, I wanted to finish that game of 20 questions, I wanted to love her through every mood and phase, I wanted to take her to the movies and leave not even knowing what the movie was about, I wanted to hold her hand, I wanted to give her my jacket when she got cold, I wanted to hug her, I wanted to kiss her forehead just because I could, I wanted to stare into her beautiful eyes and just think “wow”, I wanted to take her out to dinner, I wanted to stargaze with her by my side, I wanted to give her a massage after a long day at work, I wanted to dance in the rain with her, I wanted to hold her at night when she got frightened because of a nightmare, I wanted to fall asleep next to her, I wanted to wake up next to her, I wanted to see her do something she loved and watch how she would light up, I wanted to go on deep conversation walks, I wanted to be with her, I just wanted to be in her presence, I wanted to do that cute little run hug thing and then fall on our butts because it’s not a movie, I wanted to show her everything, I wanted to take her to New York City and Paris, I wanted to love her forever, I wanted to wake up every day just feeling so happy because I got to be with my love, I wanted to take her to that place she dreamed about, where we could love each other endlessly, where we could be ourselves without worries, where we would shiver from closeness, where nothing would stand in our way, where it would be every thing that she dreamed of and so much more, I want to take her there and be with her. I wanted to fall asleep listening to her voice, I wanted to show up at her work and order breakfast, only paying in change, because I know it annoys the crap out of her, I wanted to look at her, I mean just look at her, take in her beauty, I wanted to know every scar on her body and where it came from, I wanted to give her some of my own clothes, so that she would think of me every time she wore them, I wanted to buy her everything that her little heart desired, I wanted to give my little girl a kiss whenever she was down, I wanted to be a brat whenever she would try to kiss me and turn my head so that she would end up kissing my cheek, then she would get upset and she would make me kiss her, I wanted to tell her all of my useless knowledge, I wanted to tell her all of my stupid thoughts and ideas, I wanted to horribly sing love songs to her, I wanted her to meet my puppy, I wanted to meet her little bunny, I wanted to do all stupid cheesy sappy stuff with her, I wanted to teach her how to play soccer, I wanted to watch the sunset with her, I wanted to wake up early and see the sunrise with her, I wanted to enjoy her favorite month (October) together, I wanted to tackle her into a pile of leaves and then run away from her chasing me trying to tackle me, I wanted to carve a pumpkin with her, I wanted to just sit with her watching the leaves fall, enjoying the silence that we rarely ever have, I wanted to wake up extra early to make her breakfast, I wanted to get all bundled up with her go to the beach and watch the way the waves crash onto the shore, and see how the fall waves differ from the summer time waves, I wanted to catch lightning bugs with her and then let them go because we want them to be free, I wanted to take her to Starbucks and get the cliche seasonal drinks, I wanted to go through a flipping corn maze holding her hand, and I wanted to get lost doing so because we were being such morons, I wanted to watch her kick ass on the court, I wanted to kiss her in the moonlight on a night time fall walk, because I can’t resist kissing my little cutie, I wanted to be with her while the seasons changed and we had to deal with the terrible winters that we get up here, I wanted to play in the snow with her, because we truly are children at heart, I wanted to tackle her into pile of snow and again have to run away from her chasing me, I wanted to catch snow flakes on our tongues, I wanted to have snowball fights with her, I wanted to go ice skating for my first time with her, and you know of course fall on my ass and have her laugh at me, I wanted to go around looking at Christmas lights with her, and a cup of hot chocolate of course, then I wanted to kiss her when the ball drops and we start a New Year, after that I wanted to give her the absolute best birthday and birthday present ever, whatever that would have been, I would have made it happen. I wanted her to be my cheesy valentine I wanted to buy her a teddy bear and all of that stuff, I wanted to take her out on a ton of dates, whether that be dinner, a movie, stargazing, napping, breakfast, watching the sunset, dancing at 4 in the morning, watching the sun rise, cuddling, going to a carnival, or anything really. I wanted to get to know her in a way that I have never known anyone else before, I wanted to know all about her, I wanted to know all of her thoughts, I wanted to know all of her ideas, I wanted to bring her flowers, I wanted to give her everything, I wanted to be there when she gets sick so that I could give her soup and medicine and make sure that she rests and gets better, I wanted to be there when she gets a tummy ache and just needs to relax, I wanted to do all of this and soooooo much more. She will always be my 11:11 wish, my birthday wish, and my wish upon a star. I truly do think that I love her, I can’t say for sure because love never really was my forte. I believe that I am, because if I’m not in love with her, then what the hell does actually falling in love feel like?!?! Like that must be some crazy shit! I mean this is some crazy shit that I’m feeling to begin with soo….

Thank you for reading my “rant”. If anyone is hurting, I’ve heard that it gets better eventually. I feel your pain, we are all hurting together. Try listening to some Halsey she understands pain. Huge thank you to you guys too! Thank you for letting me air out my thoughts, feelings, and pain, it has helped me so much!

[ronnieinparaguay-blog]

My Birthday in Paraguay – Almost One Year In!

Hey there! It’s been a while huh?

Time has been moving faster than a teenage boy on his moto at 11:00pm – trust me, that’s fast. Incredibly, I will have been in Paraguay for a year on February 23rd! Ever since Christmas, I’ve been frequented by sentimental memories of where I was, who I was with, and what I was doing a year ago. In each of those memories, Ronnie from the past couldn’t possibly imagine where he would be (within Paraguay), who he would be with, or what he would be doing today. In fact, when I arrived in Paraguay, I was initially met with a constricting, heavy feeling of anticipation and fear… How was I going to spend 27 MONTHS here in this hot, humid, place filled with a variety of strange tropical diseases and parasites while living far from my family?!

Alas, as I begin my 24th year on this planet, I can confidently say that I have done more than survive the last year in Paraguay. While serving others, I have flourished in the most transformative sense of the word. This personal growth has by no means been the color of roses, just read my 55-page book of (mostly) complaints – I mean, personal journal – and you’ll understand that the last year has been a challenge. Such challenges however, if handled with care, serve as nutrients for prosperity:

Giving up Alcohol

Last year for lent, I chose to give up alcohol. Before joining Peace Corps, I drank with friends frequently as a source of fun, stress relief, celebration, sadness, and sometimes work. I even drank by myself at times while working on homework or applications to suck the unpleasantness out of the experience. In short, I drank too much and too frequently. My newfound preference to live alcohol-free has been sustained, and provided numerous life-improving benefits; I save money, I’ve lost weight, I can maintain a constant sleep routine, I can maintain a constant exercise routine, I don’t binge eat (more on this next), and I spend my time more intentionally.

Bye-bye Bulimia!

I was very reticent to talk about my struggles with eating up until recently… In perhaps May of 2016 I recognized that I had a real issue with food; my diet at the time was essentially paleo, restricting a vast range of grains and sugars (all foods that one craves even more when prohibited), which led me to “slip up”, and rationalize the opportunity to binge eat all the foods I normally wouldn’t allow myself. Mix this with alcohol, and I would binge an incredible amount, going to almost any lengths to acquire more “no-no food” to gorge upon. The following day I would be struck with an intense feeling of guilt, anger, frustration, and self-hatred. In a sense, I punished myself with 6 mile runs, even though I still felt terrible, in order to compensate for my behavior the previous night. This is one of the manifestations of bulimia; a cycle of binge eating, followed by a purging behavior (ex: throwing up, taking laxatives, or excessive exercise). At times, I would get stuck in a rut of anger and despair, taking advantage of every opportunity to feast upon whatever foods presented themselves. I remember one particularly dark week in which I constantly felt uncomfortably full and bloated from seeking out junk food at every opportunity… I had begun consulting with the university nutritionist and mental health team on a weekly basis throughout the summer and following semester, making slow progress. Nevertheless, this was one of my biggest preoccupations entering the Peace Corps; how was I going to deal with this challenge in a completely unknown environment without the support networks I had come to rely on? I came to Paraguay with a very intentional mindset, taking advantage of the drastic change in my environment to also drastically change my habits. This, combined with the wonderful choice to give up alcohol, significantly decreased the severity and frequency of binge eating. Living in a rural town (with no Walmart, McDonalds, Varsity Donuts, or other temptations) has also helped me be successful. While in Paraguay, I have become far more mindful of my eating and bodily sensations with food, and truly feel as though I have overcome this monstrous challenge, which, a little more than a year ago seemed as though it were impossible to escape from. I’m no professional, but I am more than happy to communicate personally with anyone who may be struggling through something similar if my experience may be of some utility.

Let’s go for a 10-mile stroll!

With my newfound ability to consistently get up early feeling good, I have been able to maintain a consistent exercise routine! I’m in the best shape of my life, run for the joy of the experience rather than to burn calories or compensate for unhealthy behavior, and have made clear progress in my physical and mental endurance. I’ve been able to increase my mileage to include a half-marathon distance run once a week, making 10 miles seem like an enjoyable trek. The freedom and peace I feel while on the trail, immersed in the beauty of the Paraguayan countryside, makes me feel alive at the core of my being. I think about all the amazing people in my life who love me, support me and believe in me. I pray the rosary for the incredible Women I am close to in the US, Kenya and Paraguay who are fighting against an unfair system to make the world a better place. I rest in the sights and sounds of the vibrant green vegetation, diversity of birds and animals, and clarity of the blue sky. I notice my body, my breath, my heartbeat, the wind against my skin, the change in temperature and humidity, and the sensation of traversing physical space leveraging my muscles and willpower. I send my love and positive intentions into the world, fortifying my confidence in my ability to spread justice and improved wellbeing. I feel strong and powerful… Because I am ;)

Hippie? Maaaaaybe, Vegetarian? Yup

Soooooo in Paraguay there is a lot of so’o…. I love that play on words! So’o = meat in Guaraní. But really, it’s definitely proven that 99.9929% of Paraguayans don’t consider their food a “meal” if it doesn’t have a nice helping of so’o. Unfortunately, I’m not a fan of leather-tough steak, half of which consists of fat, nor do I enjoy greasy sausage or oily chicken with the skin still on. At least, I don’t enjoy these things when they are as ubiquitous as they are in Paraguay. In October, I became interested in trying out a vegetarian diet; I was sick of meat, was well aware of meat’s greater environmental impact than plant foods, read about the heart-benefits of consuming less saturated fat and cholesterol, and wanted to see how it made me feel in terms of running (see Eat & Run by the world’s best Ultra-marathoner, Scott Jurek). Upon asking my AMAZING host mom, Mercedes, to try it out with me for 2 weeks, we have continued, and never looked back! (Paraguayans going vegetarian is almost UNHEARD OF… I’m so grateful for Mercedes’s presence in my life here…) I don’t publish this with the intention of convincing you to go vegetarian, or to bash anyone’s diet, but personally, I have thoroughly enjoyed eating a variety of veggies, legumes, fruits and whole grains, and the way these foods make me feel. With time, I’ve also come to appreciate that my sustenance does not depend on the death of other beings – a realization that, surprisingly, fills me with peace. Unlike previous “diets”, I don’t crave the foods that I no longer eat, making vegetarianism a far more sustainable approach.  

Clarity

The lack of structure, the preponderance of free time, picking up the habit of meditation (ooook maybe I am a hippie) and me having read Walden by Henry David Thoreau, have all helped me become more intentional in how I spend my time. I have discerned that my top 3 values are Contribution, Health, and Learning. If I can fit activities into my day that pertain to each of these three areas, then I will have had an excellent day. Such activities include: running, meditation, eating healthy, engaging in community projects, teaching finance, helping with scouts, working towards establishing the public library, promoting the farmer’s market, restructuring Peace Corp Paraguay’s national youth development program, reading about poverty and development, studying for the GRE, working on grad school scholarship applications, and studying Guaraní. The lack of internet, advertisements, and consumerist activities which pacify rather than nourish, have helped me clarify what is truly important in my life – enabling me to create my own definition of “progress” and fortifying my ability to achieve it. 

Indeed, I have thrived in this country full of generous, friendly people, diverse wildlife, stunning sunsets, expansive skies, delicious fruit at arms-reach, and peaceful countryside living. 

[colorsplash]

@insightstaff

Im gonna be on the way to the con by the time midnight rolls around so it’s an early HAPPY BIRTHDAY POLLY AAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAA HOPE YOU HAVE A LOT OF FUN TODAY AND ANY OTHER DAY AND IF ITS NOT LIKE THAT JUST SAY THE WORD AND ILL STEAL A BROOM SOMEWHERE AND FLY OVER TO YOU TO KICK THE ASS OF ANYONE MEAN TO YOU!!!! ALSO I LOVE YOU AND YOURE AWESOME <3<3<3<3<3<3<3 ALSO I STILL DIDNT READ CHAPTER 2 OF YOUR FANFIC SORRY BUT MAYBE ILL DO IT ON THE WAY TODAY :D BUT I STILL HAD TO THEME YOUR PRESENT TO IT CAUSE IT WAS THE BEST KI FANFIC I EVER READ AND IT MAKES ME SO HAPPY!!!!!! also please forgive me if its a bit rough i,,,,,,,, had an adventure with this :’) ANYWAYS WHOS A GOOD HORSE???? SOOOOOO HAVE A GOOD NIGHT LATER WITH RADICAL DREAMS TOO!!!!

LAZULI IM GOING YTO FUUCKING CRY YOUERE ALWAYS SO SWEET AND YOUR BIRTHDAY PRESENTS ARE ALWAYS THE BEST AAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAA MY DAY HAS BARELY STARTED BUT THANKS TO YOU IT HAS ALREADY PUSHED PAST BEYOND GREAT AND ONTO REALLY GREAT AND DONT FEEL PREASSURED TO READ MY FAN FIC ITS ALL FOR FUN SILLY!!!!!!!!!! 

AND ITS NOT ROUGH AT ALL ITS THE SMOOTHEST FAN ART I VE EVER SEEN!!!! ITS SO CUTE I LOVE IT, LOVE YOU TOO!!!!!!! TELL ME ALL ABOUT YOUR ADVENTURE WITH IT LATER IF YOU WANT TO!!!

AND I HOPE YOU VE HAD A FUN CON SO FAR AND HAVE A GREAT RADICAL TOMORROW!!!!!!!!!!! <3 <3 <3