#this either aged really badly or really well depending on you you look at it
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YALL IM FUCKING SCREAMINGGNGNG
this is the episode when chuck is showing sam all the bad futures, right? and in the car scene when future sam and dean are coming back from a hunt, and dean says “the monsters are winning” LOOK WHAT DAY IT WASSSS I CANT
#this either aged really badly or really well depending on you you look at it#how did they manage that one#someone on the spn writing team might be actually psychic#this took me OUT dude i’m screaming laughing#supernatural#spn#spn s15#spn 15x09#sam winchester#dean winchester#jan 6 2021#wraith.txt
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Happy birthday Shana!!! I wish for a continuation of the Lady Mo story if you have any inspiration. Otherwise I would love any untamed promt!
a continuation of 1 2 3 4 5 6 7 8 9 10 11 12 13 14 15 16 17 18 19 20 21 22 23 24 25 26 27 28 29 30 31 32 33 34 35 36
"Are you hurt?" Sizhui asks anxiously, jumping off his sword to tun towards Lady Xuanyu.
"Nah," she says, wincing as she stresses. "Well, nothing important."
"You're bleeding!" Jingyi shouts at a really unnecessary pitch. He unsheathes his sword and points it at Song Lan. "What did you do?"
"Stop that," she scolds, knocking his sword down. "Go get Xiao Xingchen and the girl. He's probably really confused right now."
Song Lan's expression clears and he bows to her before flying off.
His father jerks as if to go after him and Lady Xuanyu calls out, "Leave him be! He's doing what I said."
Lan Wangji hesitates, but nods and finally descends to join them. He towers over Lady Xuanyu, looking down at her with a fierce glare that makes Sizhui cringe even though it's not directed towards him. "What happened?"
"Found Xiao Xingchen, found Xue Yang, Song Lan killed him," she says, not even so much as lowering her eyes. "Xue Yang, not Xiao Xingchen, obviously. Wasn't this guy supposed to be killed during the war or something? It was a little before my time, so to speak."
"Song Lan is unharmed and you are not," his father says, lifting a hand to press it against the sluggishly bleeding wound in her shoulder.
Lady Xuanyu hisses at the contact but doesn't pull away. "He's a more experienced cultivator. Give me a couple hours and they'll be all closed up."
It used to take days for Lady Xuanyu's golden core to heal anything more complicated than a paper cut. She's strengthened it to the point that what would have been weeks of healing is reduced to just a day.
"He should have protected you," Sizhui says stubbornly. He'd rather she didn't have to heal at all. "Why did you run off with him anyway?"
"Had a hunch and figured I'd be back before you noticed," she says. Jingyi sputters. "Also, I don't need him to protect me, geez. He's a more experienced cultivator, but I still am one. I've gotten more hurt in training."
It's true, but Sizhui doesn't like that either. To harm ones body without cause is against the rules. Perhaps it's not entirely without cause, considering her rapid growth, but none of their teachers had ever beat them as badly as she demands the disciples beat her, and their cores had all turned out fine.
"What hunch did you have?" his father asks.
She winces and says, "Oh, you know, womanly intuition."
It's a lie and not even a very good one.
Lan Wangji's eyes narrow but they're interrupted by Song Lan returning with two people balanced precariously on his sword. Sizhui assumes the other man clad all in white must be Xiao Xingchen but doesn't know who the blind girl that looks to be about his age is.
"Xuanyu!" the girl calls out joyously, causing him to reevaluate his assessment of blind. She's being awfully familiar with his step mother. The girl leaps from the sword before it's fully on the ground and goes running towards them, shoulder pass Lan Wangji to body slam into Lady Xuanyu. "You're still alive, right? You said you would be!"
Lady Xuanyu laughs, closing her arms around the girl's shoulders. Her shoulder is bleeding again now that his father isn't keeping pressure on it. Cant the girl see that she's injured? "Yes, yes, I'm still alive. Excellent work keeping Xiao Xingchen out of the fray, A-Qing. I knew I could depend on you."
The girl - A-Qing, apparently - glows under the praise, beaming up at Lady Xuanyu, still with her arms around her waist.
What's her problem anyway?
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In the Snow (Cold Front)
***
This fandom does not have enough fanfiction for what the game is worth so have this to try and make up for it.
This game was developed by @racheldrawsthis and it’s completely free, I highly recommend you try it out!
Link to the game
***
Warnings: Bullying??, minor violence
Ships: Romantic or Platonic Winnie x Augustine (Though considering they are still children; it would probably be better to see it as platonic.)
Synopsis: “Come on Winnie!” A young Augustine exclaimed as he tugged Winnie out of his front door by the sleeve. “It has not snowed in ages here; we have to enjoy it as much as we can!”
“I don’t want to!” The poor boy whined, resisting him as much as he could and holding onto the doorway like his life depended on it. “The others would not want to play with me!”
***
“Come on Winnie!” A young Augustine exclaimed as he tugged Winnie out of his front door by the sleeve. “It has not snowed in ages here; we have to enjoy it as much as we can!”
“I don’t want to!” The poor boy whined, resisting him as much as he could and holding onto the doorway like his life depended on it. “The others would not want to play with me!”
Augustine pouted at that, his eyes narrowing in a cute frown as he suddenly let the other boy go who, not expecting that, yelped as he ended up falling backwards. Thankfully though, any major incident was prevented as the culprit caught Winnie into a hug.
“How can you be so sure when you didn’t even try?” Augustine questioned, turning the other around before grabbing his cheeks and squishing them. “We talked about that yesterday you know!”
Winnie looked down, one of his hands on Augustine’s wrists. If he had any plan to push the other child away, it was soon abandoned as he stared at the ground, eyes filled with potential tears.
“I know...” He sniffled. “But I can’t help it, I don’t want to be alone, but I don’t want to impose either--”
“You won’t be, I’m telling you!” Augustine sighed as he let the other’s face alone. “But if you’re that scared, I guess we can try it another time. We can just spend some time together.”
Winnie looked up, bighting up. “Really? That doesn’t bother you? I mean, I wouldn’t want to prevent you from playing with your friends--”
Before he could go on any further, he jolted as he felt the other flick his forehead.
“I told you, if you want me to be your friend, you’re going to have to make me want to be your friend and so far, you haven’t had the opportunity to do that so today is the day!” He then pointed his finger toward Winnie. “You better put in your best effort because I only make friends with cool people!”
Winnie blinked his tears away, smiling as his traits adjusted to the determination burning in his soul. “I will do my best!” He exclaimed, earning a nod of approval from the other boy.
“Good good, that’s the spirit!” He grabbed one of Winnie’s gloved hands before pointing to the horizon. “Let’s go on an adventure then! We’re going to save and give the snowmen the land they rightfully deserve!”
Winnie titled his head to the side. “What does that mean though?”
“I have no clue!” Augustine proudly said, his free hand on his hip. “It sounded cool though, so I said it!”
“It did.” Winnie enthusiastically agreed, letting himself be dragged by the other to the nearest park.
As they walked, a few of Augustine’s friends waved at them to which he responded by waving back and having Winnie do so as well. A sigh of relief left the other boy as the other children did not seem to react badly to it, simply going back to their own activities with a smile.
The two of them arrived near a frozen lake, a giant tree hiding them from sight. Once they reached that spot, Augustine let go of Winnie’s hand and face planted into the snow, waving his arms and legs around to make a snow angel.
Winnie blinked, chuckling before joining him, the silhouettes of the angel seeming to merge with one another near their arm.
Winnie was the first to stand up again to admire their work, smiling brightly. “I’ve never done a snow angel before.” He admitted, the other boy, who was still on the ground, gasping from shock.
“You haven’t? You missed half of what is good in life then!” Augustine stood up as well, watching Winnie curiously.
“Well, where I’m from it never really snowed so...” He pat him on the back, before running off to another spot.
Winnie followed him, albeit a bit slower than him. “Does that mean you’ve never done a snowman as well?” Augustine asked, already gathering snow chunks for the construction of a new being.
Winnie shook his head, crouching next to him and watching what he was doing. “I’ve never made one.”
Augustine thought hard for a bit before speaking up again. “In that case, I’ll teach you! Better follow what I do well!”
Winnie saluted. “Sir, yes sir!”
The other boy tilted his head to the side, his confusion so clear it would be easy to imagine a question mark drawn next to his head.
“The people in the TV always do that.” Winnie explained sheepishly, scratching the back of his head. “Was that weird?”
The two stared into each other’s eyes in silence for a solid three seconds before bursting out laughing together.
“Alright, no more joking around!” Augustine stated, still laughing in between his words. “We still have many people to make with the snow!”
“Sorry!” Winnie apologized, quickly getting into position.
***
“Augustine?” His mother’s voice suddenly reached his ears, interrupting the two children in their endeavour. “Where are you?”
“Oh no!” Said child whispered, face palming. “I totally forgot to tell Mom we were going to the park!” He turned to look at his companion. “Winnie, can you keep guard for me? I won’t take long, I promise!”
Said boy nodded, his hands still in the snow trying to make a good base. “You can count on me!”
“Thank you, I’ll be right back!” With that, Augustine ran off toward his mother to explain their disappearance, leaving Winnie with their snowman friends, not suspecting that anything would happen.
***
‘Wow, it took more time than I thought to calm Mom down!’ The boy thought to himself as he walked back behind the tree. Just as he was about to step in though, he suddenly stopped in his tracks as he heard a sob.
He ran there, worried in his tone as he passed the tree. “Winnie? Are you o--”
His eyebrows furrowed at the sight in front of him. Their snowmen were gone, most of their parts lying miserably on the ground and even their snow angels disappeared, their forms having been deformed because of being trampled. Footsteps covered them and were oriented toward the weeping Winnie in the middle of the snowmen graveyard, missing his winter outfit and left in his indoor clothes.
Having heard him, the other child turned in his direction and just cried harder upon seeing him.
“I’m sorry!” He cried out, burying his face in his hands. “I really tried to protect the snowmen; I really did! But--”
“Hey hey, calm down!” He crouched to his level, his hands in front of him to show he was not angry. “What happened? And where is your coat?”
Winnie sniffled, shaking. “These tall people came in and destroyed everything!” He made big gestures with his hands as if to show the other the difference in height between him and them. “And when I tried to stop them, they slapped me and took my clothes!” He wept as indignation passed through the other boy’s face.
He was about to insult them, most probably, but then he took notice of how red Winnie’s face looked and realized that he must have been freezing there. Just to make sure, he grabbed one of Winnie’s hands in his own and even through the fabric, he could feel how cold the limb was.
“You’re so cold!” He remarked, standing up and pulling the other on his two legs as well. “We have to go back inside before you get a cold!”
“But--” Winnie looked back at the snowmen carcass.
“No but, come on!” He took off one of his gloves and handed it to the other boy. “Here take this one!”
Winnie frowned. “But what about your other hand?”
“It’s fine,” he reassured, taking one of Winnie's freezing hands in his warm ones. “See?”
The boy finally nodded, slipping the glove on. They began walking toward the entrance of the park before they were stopped by the other children who noticed the unusual state of the newcomer.
“Augustine!” One of them called out, his eyes darting back and forth between said child and Winnie. “Why is your friend crying?”
With encouragement from him, Winnie started explaining what happened during Augustine’s absence, a small group of children forming around them.
“That’s horrible!” A girl exclaimed before unwrapping her scarf and handing it to him. “Here, you can have that for now! I have a hood anyway, I’ll be fine!”
“O-oh-” Winnie stuttered, taking it, and thanking her quietly. He looked surprised at how kind the other children were being to him right now. Turning to Augustine, he noticed the way the other looked at him as if saying ‘I told you they would like you.’
“Do you remember what the bad guys looked like?” One of the boys suddenly asked, gaining everyone’s attention.
“They were two.” He began, looking up at the sky. “One of them was really tall with orange hair and freckles on his face and the other had dark hair and brown glasses--”
“With a line across his cheek, right?” Said boy finished, Winnie looking up at him in surprise.
“Yes... how did you know?”
“My father told me about them.” He responded. “Apparently, they are in middle school and are well-known for causing trouble.”
“We can’t let them get away with this!” Augustine suddenly exclaimed, making Winnie jump in surprise. “Do you know where they could have gone?”
As the group all thought deeply, one girl suddenly pointed toward the entrance. “Look, they’re the bad guys, right?”
“Wow, it’s really them!” Another guy said. “We should get the adul--”
But he did not have the time to finish his sentence, Augustine already running toward them. Since they were holding hands, Winnie was brought along as well, their two silhouettes leaving the area as the other children sighed and ran in the opposite direction to get their parents.
***
“Hey you!” Augustine called out, pointing at the ginger person, who was holding Winnie’s bright blue coat in his hands. “Give Winnie his coat back!”
His friend scoffed at him. “You should go home kid; your parents must be so worried about you.” The other snickered, not paying any attention to the two children.
“Not until you give it back and apologize!” He stood firmly in place as Winnie’s face paled seeing the reaction of the two others at the last word. He attempted to drag him to safety but the other would not budge.
“Apologize?” The taller one repeated before laughing as he gripped the child by the collar. “Now listen here--”
“Put him down!” Winnie shouted, grabbing the attention of the other guy.
“Ah for fuck’s sake, do they not know how to shut up?” He groaned, walking menacingly toward Winnie.
The boy froze, looking around in panic. His eyes landed on Augustine who still looked as brave as ever despite being in a very disadvantageous position. He wanted to run away but that expression stopped him.
He was there because of him; it was not right for him to just run now!
He noticed a little rock by his feet and without thinking grabbed it, along with a ball of snow before chucking one at the middle schooler walking toward him and the other at the one holding Augustine captive.
The rock landed on the guy’s cheek, making him take a step back and reached the other in the eye, making him yelp in pain as he released both Augustine and Winnie’s coat.
“You’re gonna pay for that!” The one with the glasses yelled as he sprinted toward Winnie, fist raised. The child braced himself for the impact, raising his arms to protect himself but it was in vain as an adult voice came from behind.
“Stephen!” The teenager froze in shock. “How many times have I told you to stop bothering the other children?!” The woman yelled, freezing the two.
“But Mom-”
“No but!” She replied, grabbing both teenagers by the ear, and dragging them somewhere else to scold them. Their father stayed behind, reaching for Winnie’s coat, and handing it back to him.
“I’m sorry for my sons’ behavior.” He sighed, helping Augustine. “Were you two hurt?” They both shook their heads, making the man heave in a sigh of relief.
“Thank the stars, I’ll make sure this never happens again, you can count on me for that.” The two children nodded as the adult walked away toward his wife.
Winnie played with his fingers, feeling too guilty about putting Augustine in danger to look him in the eyes. “I...”
“That was so cool!” The other exclaimed, snapping the other into focus. Augustine had stars in his eyes as he shook the other child. “The way you just went peeew with the rock and snow was awesome!” He praised, rendering the other speechless.
He was finally released, the other grinning from ear to ear as he extended his fist toward him. “I’ve made my decision; I want to be your friend!”
Winnie’s eyes sparkled at that as he fist bumped him. “Thank you, Auggie!”
The other tilted his head. “Auggie?”
“Ah-” Winnie’s cheecks flushed in embarrassment. “I’m sorry I uh... that came out of nowhere!”
“It’s fine, it sounds cool! You can keep calling me that.” He shook his hand. “Happy to be your friend, Winnie.”
***
“Well, someone seems to be in a good mood!” Winnie’s mother remarked as she put the plate on the table. “What happened?”
“I made a friend.” The boy with a wide grin replied.
#cold front#cold front game#cold front winnie#cold front augustine#winnie bosko#augustine orlov#fanfic#fanfiction#this game is so underrated hello??#ngl I’ve been having ideas of writing the game events but through Winnie’s POV but school is kicking my ass as we speak#i hope no one has done this yet#I would be devastated#fluff#angst#ship?#ship? maybe#platonic or romantic
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SPLATOON OC TOURNEY ROUND 4 BATTLE 4
Talia Yareli by @gingergari vs Tami by @wyrm-in-a-closet
PROPAGANDA/BACKSTORY
TALIA
Talia (age 24 (~16 in splat1), pronouns he/her) is from Calamari County! Her family consists of her mother, her older sister Moselle (28, a firefighter) that she looks up to a lot, and her younger sister Ren (18). He originally moved to Inkopolis to make a living as a pro battler, which he did for a few years with his roommate turned girlfriend Peri, maining both Dynamos depending on the kits given. Then Grizzco opened for business, and it turned out that they paid pretty well all things considered, and that they were both *really* good at it. (They also thought it was fun for the most part) Since they were consistently hitting the upper ranks of Profreshional, when Grizzco expanded to the Splatlands the pair were invited to relocate as Eggsecutive VPs to help support the branch and to help train up some new recruits. That's how Victoria (Eggs) and Fiorello (Safety) ended up joining them :] Speaking of nicknames, Talia has the worst name memory in the world and has a lot of trouble remembering the names of people and occasionally objects, so he gives them a nickname she remembers a lot better. (Peri is a nickname! But sometimes Talia falls back on pet names until he remembers either her nickname or actual name) He is very worried that he comes across as rude for it (or anything in general) so tries to be as friendly as possible. He was the one that gave Safety the life preserver gear as a gift! Talia is a huge fan of Big Man (finds that he relates to him the most) and did cry when he lost the leader splatfest :( Also cried when he was homesick and tried to get her favorite dish, clam mochi, at a Splatlands restaurant which turned out as you would expect. His favorite splatband is Sashimori. Talia is friends with my Agent 3, but does not know the truth about Grizzco.
TAMI
An inkling born to ordinary parents who worked at Gone Fission power plant. However, a salmonid big run happened in the area, and because Grizzco didn't yet exist, it had to be abandoned, and Tami's parents were killed. Tami herself, who was also there, was badly injured and lost her right arm, was found by some salmonids, but because she was a young inkling the salmonids didn't know what she was and so instead of killing her took her home. She then spent almost her entire life growing up with the salmonids, and became a very skilled fighter, but also starting a band with a couple other salmonids. They make music that's like horrible to listen to and will overestimate you. Once she was 14, she joined the war on salmonids on the side of the salmonids. Over time Grizzco expands and poses a larger and larger threat to the salmonids, so Tami decides that she's going to go try and put a stop to it, because she's the only one who could make it to inkling civilation without being killed, although that doesn't change the fact she didn't know the language, culture, or anything. After spending several nights on the streets of splatsville, Tami is found by Tide, an octoling who's been living there for some time. Tide takes Tami under their wing, despite them knowing nothing about each other. Over the next few months Tide teachers Tami inkling language, has Tami participate in battles (where she fuckin rocks at it bc she's been literally trained for war), all while Tami searches for more info on Grizzco, but unfortunately nobody knows shit about it. Finally she happens across Cuttlefish and eventually falls into Alterna, where she has no idea what's going on until eventually wow Mr. Grizz is there. She fucking kills him and then just kinda leaves without really joining the squidbeak splatoon she just wanted to kill Mr grizz. Anyways then she and Tide probably go back to salmonid or something I haven't really figure this out. Sorry for the text wall
#splatoon oc tourney#splatoon 2#splatoon#polls#splatoon polls#splatoon oc#fandom tournament#poll time#tumblr poll#tumblr tournament#tournament#character tournament#bracket tournament#tournament polls#character polls#poll tournament#round 4
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Some Personal Thoughts on Disability in Enstars
disclaimer: disability is a very broad term that covers many different experiences. i will be talking about physical disabilities since i feel most comfortable doing so/have experience with them. obviously that ignores a Huge part of what disability and chronical illness is and can be. but i think it is beyond my capabilities to talk about experiences i don't know much about.
alt caption: i think ritsu is a good character and im trying to explain to myself why
this is sort of a long post, sorry.
content warnings: i talk about ableism and touch on related topics such as dehumanization and objectification and such below. individual parts of this post have their own cw's.
Enstars Writing, Beloathed
to get this out of the way; it is bad sometimes. this is discussed very often. it doesnt depend on the authors either, in my opinion, some writers will hit you with something really troublesome only to (seemingly accidentally) invent human emotion and compassion in a different story. i dont want to repeat what others have said eloquently but there is a fair amount of imperialist worldviews, xenophobia, just racism really, transphobia, ableism, and copaganda to be found in enstars. this isnt about x character being x thing, but about how it is very noticable when the author of a story holds these worldviews and they bleed into their stories.
so that is not the greatest foundation if youre looking for well-written disabilities. but i wouldnt be reading enstars if i didnt think it genuinely is really really good sometimes. in my opinion, the way disabilities are portrayed is a mixed bag overall but there are some extremely worthwhile bits that touched me quite a lot.
What I personally understand as Well-Written Disability
the way disabled people suffer often goes unnoticed, and disabled people dont have a platform to talk about oppression. a lot of life-changing issues can go unnoticed to those unnaffected by them, even if they are in broad daylight: underfounded or entirely lacking healthcare, the way many healthcare systems are marketbased and ethics are prone to suffer bc of this (even under 'welfare' capitalism), a lack of equal marriage, the inaccessibility of the most basic and necessary facilities, financing care and the dependency on family/loved ones (both a logistical and psychological problem), the huge stigma against disabled people, etc, etc, you get me....
we need to write about people who need care, to keep them in mind at all times. disabled people are not a minority in a mathematical sense but in a hierarchical sense. it is naive to think of them as "a substancial percentage" of populations. as we age, we inevitably all enter the stage of needing care at some point. SO to an extend, i want to claim its a topic that affects every single person. yet disabled people are rarely a central topic anywhere. it is not enough to acknowledge them, we need to plan and think with them in mind. and Write with them in mind, i guess.
SO when i see fiction grapple the topic, i am usually really happy, even if the portrayal isnt ideal. (critical, maybe, but generally speaking very happy) pointing out "badly" written disabled characters is obviously not as easy as calling someone out for uncritically saying "i think eugenics are a good idea!!!" through fiction. people with that sort of facist mindset exist of course but ableism does not end there.
if i were to single out things i see often: i think the most disappointing thing a story can do is to - mention a disability without it ever having an impact on people in the story (-> the disability is basically nonexistent, has no impact or relevance, outside of a theoretical mention) OR - uncritically use a disabled character as a mere plot devise, without granting them the ability to speak (-> dehumanization, a lack of understanding that disabled people are, well, People. they do shit.)
and then of course there is fetishization, both in a literal sense and in an inspiration porn sense and the problem of turning disability into a caricature for jokes (either to other disabled people for their behaviour/body or to create a sense of satisfying superiority by laughing at them) but i feel like those problems explain themselves.
to apply these to very basic examples: i think often something like a robotic sci-fi prosthetic is not a good way to represent a disability because it fails to represent what people go through irl and provides a "magic fix" without repercussions. here is a really good post about it. about the plot device issue... i think it is similar to what people often criticise as "manpain". a disabled person will never appear or speak, they are demoted to being the reason an able-bodied character acts a certain way, like a lifeless accessory. this doesnt always have to be bad, esp if its just a sideplot! but it can get tiring if the audience never gets to learn about other aspects of the unseen character in question and we are only introduced to their suffering.
all of this to talk about gacha idol boys. it is how it is. anyway, this is roughly my mental state when i tackle enstars.
disclaimer 2: i am really just a kogaP. this influences which characters i encounter when reading. there are tons of stories i just never looked at and there is SO MUCh lore i just dont know about. please lemme know if you have additions to stuff i say/understand a character better/have related story recommendations! tl;dr the sakuma bit will be long.
disclaimer 3: i genuinely adore every single character mentioned below and am always excited to learn smth new about them. if i criticize writing, that has nothing to do with that character or their fans. it is about the writers.
the most obvious example. Eichi (content warning for brief mentions of self harm and suicidal ideation)
everything eichi does, he does with the knowledge he will most likely die young. that is a truly dramatic setup.
but before i get back to that thought. it always felt to me like eichis illness(/es) lack a certain sense of conciseness? i do not think you need to put a name and diagnosis on it for it to be relatable and real to readers, tbh!! though to achieve believability, there needs to be a good amount of consistency. what i can recall off the top of my head is the following:
he breaks down/straight up blacks out frequently due to weakness and dizzyness
measures were taken to secure his safety in those situations (the infamous Eichi-kun Gauge as seen in Element)
his stamina is seriously low
he coughs a lot
we saw him cough up blood (Daydream)
he relies on long hospital stays because his health needs to be monitored and/or supported this closely
he stays inside a lot (hinting towards problems with his immune system?)
being healthy enough to eat unhealthy food is a big deal to him, so there are dietary restrictions/it was necessary to precisely control what he eats
his grandfather, who died recently, is considered an outlier for how long he lived (so it IS hereditary)
which..... could be a lot of things...? or, more likely: a culmination of many things at once. if you have headcanons on eichis health, please lemme know!
but in addition to eichis terminal illness, there is a second quality to him that separates him from most disabled people: he is extremely wealthy. and his wealth is fundamentally important to stories. usually illness and poverty go hand in hand, since income is tied to the ability to work, which worsens an already bad situation. no matter how limited eichis actions are because of his body, the possibilties offered by his wealth make him a central figure in every overarching plot. in addition to this, his family is well aware of his consitution and he is a patriarchal leading figure to them, the head to their coporate hierachy. eichi is free of the things that usually rid the chronically ill of their safety and power: society (he is an idol and popular) and money (he is the richest boy in japan). if youd ask me, i think that while being chronically ill is of course physically taxing, the worse problem is the economic state it puts you in. eichi simply overcomes this? yes, he is terminally ill, his situation is terrifying. but he has an extraordinary amount of control while he lives. more than a poor yet able-bodied person may have.
his unique circumstances enable him to be incredibly active. this is so fun to read about in my opinion. its a fascinating setup to me. without casting any sort of moral judgement on his actions and the antagonistic role he plays; he is, excuse me for my phrasing here, a disabled power fantasy. (at least to me)
this is a double-edged sword to him. because of who he is as a person (ambitious, cunning, ruthless, diligent)
he lives in relative safety but his strong ambition and financial ability to fulfill his dreams tempt him to go past his limits. because his remaining lifetime is uncertain, the need to preserve the body he is given seems uneconomical (a mindset his upbringing and education as an heir to his family would have enforced imo) he is bound to break down sooner or later anyway. i think he begins to see himself and his body as a tool to achieve his goals and neglects spending time on anything BUT working towards them. so the moment he runs out of goals (like at the end of Element), his reason to "remain" becomes futile.
it really struck with me how he appears in Blackbird - emaciated, pathetic, purposefully neglected because he chose to be neglected and weak in an act of self harm bc denying medical attention (something that couldnt have happened otherwise) wataru has to remind him that no one died and the obvious connection to make is that the eccentrics are physically unharmed and starting over, that they should not be a source of guilt to eichi. but i think this is just as much about eichi himself. he might have expected to die since he left the hospital and overexhausted himself at school and as an idol. he didnt die though. it was a real possibility and seemed likely but he didnt. the neglect and indirect self harm here point out, to me, that he saw the "role" he gave himself as fulfilled at that point and waited to die.
eichi stands over economic or social factors that could ostracize and dehumanize him but funnily enough he manages to do so himself by treating his body as a tool and his happiness as an option that got overshadowed by a need to succeed.
this vulnerability makes him, despite how vague the descriptions of his illness are and despite how unrelatable his wealth is, a very satisfying character imo. it is engaging to me. certain limits are removed for him but he created new ones, specifically because he did not see himself as something worth sustaining once he becomes useless. imo, eichi applied the idea that a lifes worth can be measured in its ability to function in an industry to himself. and spiralled over it, entirely inverting his uncanny amount of bodily autonomy. it is clear how the situation he is in worsens his mental health like that. and how his mental health in turn worsens his physical health. it is inseperable.
i cant really get into !! era eichi because i genuinely just dont... know enough. the fine tradition of having a weekly H-Day stands out, though. after all, eichi has new bigger ambitions and is, once again, inviting his own ruin through overexhaustion. so his friends (the new addition of having friends is essential) had to forcefully make him stop for at least one day a week. that is pretty big. i think.
this is true for many marginalized existences so it of course applies to disabled people: if neither your surroundings nor yourself permit you to feel human and therefore assign your person an inherent worth and lovability... sometimes you need a friend to do so!!! social circles are the best support structure for your health.
The Sakuma Family
(i will get into ritsu and rei seperately later on. there are just a few concepts i want to get out of the way that apply to both of them.)
so... to get a little theoretical; the concept of "disability" relies on the concept of a "normative" human existence. "disability" is an otherness and can therefore easily be seen as a "monstrocity" in the eyes of ignorant people, something that instils fear. (there is a reason why a lot of horror exploits disabled bodies as a source of terror and uses mental hospitals as settings) from an able-bodied point of view it seems "desirable" to be a "normative human", yet the disabled person knows that is not a possibility and knows their worth and place as a human in human spaces. at least ideally. able-bodied people sometimes lack this understanding. there is nothing to be desired about an able body or fixed about a disabled body, beyond what medical care can do for ones quality of life.
if you have read operetta, this is all very familiar;
operetta, chapter 17 and, well, here we are. vampires. a very basic truth about the sakuma family that i hate to see denied is that they are human. there is nothing supernatural about them. they are just disabled. or, to turn the idea around, if one was to assign them vampiristic traits and such... is vampirism not a disability and should be taken seriously as such? if you consider the limits a vampire has while coordinating through their life, is that not... strangely just a disabled experience? (MINUS THE KILLING PEOPLE OBVIOUSLY but much modern fiction is sympathetic towards vampires instead and does not display them as violent)
anyway, to hear it from the horses mouth (the horse is rei):
operetta, chapter 19 the sakuma family is a curious case. their condition is hereditary though the severity varies from person to person. it comes up in many stories but for the most part i am thinking about operetta, resurrection sunday, and devils right now. how did this all start? what made an entire family turn to live as vampires, with blood ceremonies and all that? what bizarre kind of generational trauma is this?
(and, while it does not play a role as important as it did for eichi, they are rich. this is important to mention. many normal experiences just dont apply to them because wealth makes them immune. ... how did the sakumas become this influential anyway.)
for an unspecified but long time, an entire family managed to mentally entirely seperate themselves from the rest of humanity because of their chronical illness. personally, i have no doubt this is the result of a world that othered them first. whether the main motivator at play here is a defensiveness towards a society that cannot understand you or an internal need to turn hardships into an identity that can be carried with pride. it takes a considerable amount of emotional strength and planning for the "hey we are human actually" declaration in operetta to occur.
they are, weirdly, what people mean when they talk about a "toxic anti-recovery mindset". (an expression i struggle with because this sort of rhetoric is often used to discriminate against disabled people who speak up for themselves or ask for accomodations. but that aside) it is an amount of pride that leads to internal self destruction.
of course, as is the case with every single character i write about in this post, a lot of it has to do with aesthetics and being chuuni to sell gacha cards. so we know the reason behind the reason. but it makes for some bizarre in-universe implications.
but in any case, the fact that their identity as false vampires is something they have always carried, that modern society sees as "mystical and sexy" has a hilarious side effect: their disability becomes marketable under the guise of vampirism. it is hard to recover from that.
so again, we have a double-edged sword: to present ones medical condition as a "persona" declares it as a performative act, something that is done to bring joy to an audience. personal detriment is not considered here, since it stops being a part of ones being and starts to become "work". the time and place of ones symptoms has to overlap with the time and place of ones performances. or people will hate you for your uncontrollable illness. however, rei and ritsu are both also able to carry their condition with a sort of playfulness. it is almost something like the act of "reclaiming" when they purposefully choose to larp a little for fun. usually, when a scene mentions their disability in the context of comic relief, they have control over the situation that unfolds and even initiate it and invite others to laugh alongside them. this can be a slippery slope to getting harrassed of course.... but i am rather baffled by the amount of dominance they have in social interactions. so it just reads as a healthy amount of dark humour to me.
this, and the consistent writing of their symptoms, and the ability to easily compare it to real existing illnesses, easly make them my favourite instance of written disabled people in the series. their illness has an impact on their behaviour and it is detrimental! and they are both very human in the way they attempt to cope. there is a certain realism to it. idek.
many people seem to headcanon them with myalgic encephalomyelitis, which is a really good explanation, and i personally want to suggest narcolepsy. the point being, there is room to accurately assign them a realistic relatable and understandable condition, even if nothing is ever named in canon. and of course they are mentioned to have an iron deficiency.
bear with this slightly "out there" theory for a moment: have you or a friend ever tried to get a compensation for your disadvantage at school or uni? it can be really hard to do, if it is possible at all, even if it is something very simple (more time, a slightly different enviroment, the ability to drink or sit, etc) yumenosaki is a school for performance arts, mainly idols. bold statement: it might genuinely be easier to get/explain an accommondation for your "idol quirk" (something that would be actively fostered), than for your disability. not that yumenosaki is very strict or asks for a lot anyway, its just something that has been on my mind.
here is another funny thing i have been thinking about: both of them crave juice, soda, and fruit - sugary yet fresh stuff. i feel like this is not uncommon for people who suffer from excessive tiredness and fatigue, the body subconsciously wishes for some sugar intake to "wake up".
Inventing a Guy to Cope. Rei
funny title aside... he... did that... ? rei is a curious example of how different mostly unrelated traumas can overlap. he had no childhood, thanks to his family that considered him "mature" at a very young age and his early status as a child star. and his bad health is a miserable addition to this. it is quite scary to image how pressured to do right he felt growing up and how that resulted in the fragmented distanced way he views himself; reinventable, and ultimately unknowable. (to others AND himself)
despite his bad health he has always been working and performing "well". he was praised for his remarkable talents but rarely had the chance to stop and patch himself up. whether this was a result of a pushy enviroment or his personality as a people pleaser who cannot show weakness and imperfection is hard to tell. maybe both.
the state he is in in Crossroad is fascinating to me. he all but directly lists the criteria of depression to keito when he attempts to explain his sorrows. he is restless, rowdy, mentions later on that he enrolled in yumenosaki against his familys wishes. he is very much searching for joy and his own identity in the middle of a health emergency. this has to do with the way he was raised, only knowing how to exist for and serve others, how he was made to sell a made-up version of himself, but i also believe it has to do with the fact he has started to exclude himself from his familys traditions and values. he started to cast away the uncertain "monstrosity" existence of his family (as well as the false idolhood others assigned him) and instead embraces humanity as a chronically ill person.
crossroad, i forgor which chapters
this of course marks a starting point of change that later results in him making up the wagahai pronouns persona - something he specifically created with the intention of looking vulnerable and weak. because he yearned to do less, to recover from years of exhaustion.
in a way, i want to say both, the ore pronouns persona and the wagahai pronouns persona, are attempts to cope with expectations he cannot handle physically or mentally. one relies on masking, on appearing stronger than he actually is and therefore invulnerable, and the other relies on exaggerating his weakness, in an attempt to finally let others recognize it. i think as a disabled person, both are performances one has to learn in order to "function" in everyday life, while remaining safe from serious harm (doing badly at ones job or classes, angering others that hold power over your life). since ones circumstances are often hard to grasp for someone who does not share the same illness, there is no choice but to simplify and exaggerate until symptoms become tangible concepts or to just brave through it, at the cost of ones health and future time.
rei in particular, for better or for worse, is incredibly capable when he needs to be and unfortunately that means others will often not take his health seriously because they saw him function just fine the other day. this is a general problem but an obvious offender in that regard is koga, who comments on reis fatigue constantly and loves to create a bit of a high expectations toxic work enviroment (and, to be fair, rei terrorizes him too. kogas hostility towards rei is sometimes ableist but not really rooted in ableism. after all koga is highly aware how performative the wagahai persona can be and is a huge motivational and inspirational factor in reis life. its a whole complex)
!! era holds some positive changes. his mental need to please other people remains a persistent source of trouble for him (and others) but he seems to really let his body recover and lives a more nocturnal life. both kuro and kaoru mention that he looks more healthy (in succession match???? i think??) since he finally stopped enforcing a normal day/night cycle on his body just to comply with social norms. you can indeed be very human even if you break human-made rules.
(additional comment: "becoming human" is of course a theme for each of the eccentrics and not uniquely tied to disability, it very much has to do with the objectification one goes through as a public figure. but this is a post about disability and it really fits in well. so here we go)
Literally Just a Realistic Teenager. Ritsu
ritsu, while not really being among my favourite characters, is my favourite instance of a disabled character in enstars. partly because of his writing and partly because my personal experiences overlap with his so much it sometimes is painful - but always extremely satisfying. just had to get that out.
ritsu is perhaps the most visibly ill. he blacks out and sleeps where he stands, everywhere, without control and often requires other peoples (well, mostly maos) assistance in order to remain safe when this happens. he also repeated a year of school, specifically because of his disability.
he is painfully aware of this. that he looks ill, that he behaves ill, that he is an underachiever compared to others of the same age, even to people younger than him.
ritsu developed unique behaviours to deal with this: he is very dependent and clingy and often asks others to do things for him, unapologetically. that does not mean asking for help doesnt hurt his pride, just that it is the most viable strategy for everyday survival that he ended up with. other than that, he clings more to the vampire identity than rei does. either to defy his older brother or, and this is important imo, because it is the one safety net he has to fall back on that makes him feel "normal" and like he is a regular being. albeit not human. no matter how much others might blame him for his shortcomings or how much he is a failure in the eyes of society, he is very regular for a "vampire". under the logic developed by his family, he is just a child, and the world at large is to blame. it is an easier truth to accept than facing systematic injustice and prejudice in a human world.
the stories i mentioned in another part above aside, i really love what ensemble band does for him; ritsu gets extremely irritated with mao in the prologue, seemingly out of nowhere. his character is allowed to express this sort of anger and to take it out on others, even if it is unjust and misguided. it is not pretty and it isnt good behaviour but it is a very heartfelt emotion to me.
its obvious that he cannot compete with others and that this will always been seen as his personal fault instead of a circumstance he cannot influence. and more than that: no one appreciates the real efforts he makes. for instance, getting himself out of bed in time for classes is difficult for regular teenagers and straight up hellish for ritsu. but he manages to do so a lot later on. instead of acknowledging that this is a real accomplishment on his part and possibly really exhausting and bad for his comfort in the long run, this is seen as doing the bare minimum.
while it is not correct, the malice ritsu sometimes treats others with comes from an comprehensible place. able-bodied ignorance can appear as purposeful slights made by those more privileged than him.
yet he learns to conform. his friends are important to him. knights success is important to him. (thought mental health probably played a role here too and made things even harder prior to his third year of high school) and yet;
seven bridge, chapter 24, but its really just an example i had at hand
the remarks stay the same. his peers still cannot help but brand him as "just lazy", even if they are kind and understanding otherwise and habour no ill intent. so i would like to ask: how long can he keep this up? how hard is this on him?
i dont think i need to explain just how common and hurtful it is to be accused of "laziness". probably the single most irritating comment someone with fatigue will hear every single day.
however, on the flipside, ritsu has perhaps the most people who care for him in comparison with other characters, though they sometimes complain (communication is hard, care is hard, everyone in enstars is very young and i cannot bring myself to see those comments as malice. its a mixture of ignorance and ones own burdens) there is mao, obviously. tsumugi is a very funny example. knights, of course, in particular naru. (at least based on my humble knights readings)
quite interesting how he just decided mao is his caretaker, now and in the future. i shared a few of my thoughts on caretaking here. this is.... a huge responsibility to just put on someones shoulders, to say the least. he shouldnt be doing this but i think it speaks for itself that this is a problem that is on his mind. ITS IS A REALLY IMPORTANT TOPIC TO BRING UP, especially since, the younger you are, the harder it is to get insurance to pay for your care. yes, he is often just teasing mao, but ritsu is looking for ways to get through life. by learning to be as independent as possible, whenever possible. though often you really just find yourself at the mercy of friends and family.
Inter-Sibling Violence
apologies, i will be done with the sakumas soon. i didnt know how to fit this in at the start.
the relationship between rei and ritsu, as people with the same disability who experiences different symptoms and challenges, is worth thinking about. infighting within people of the same disability is very common since experiences can be so different, there are no universal truths or opinions. with different lifestyles come different expectations for what is "normal" and sometimes pressure and social norms can cause someone to shift blame onto others who have no achieved the same things in life.
rei and ritsu are said to have been very close as small children and likely depended on each other a lot. i can see how reis fostering nature and ritsus needy nature developed alongside each other and enforced each other.
time and time again, rei says that he is a "less severe" case, that ritsu has it worse. he jets around the world because he feels forced to do so, when ritsu just wanted emotional support from him to begin with. ritsu stayed alone at home, sheltered and likely caged by their families convictions. but! i want to suggest the following: as much as it hurt him, it was important for reis health to be away from his family, too. i dont think staying there would have been good for him. his absence and the experiences he made away from home were an important catalyst for the positive family development we see in operetta.
of course, rei means well. he cares. he is trying to have a positive impact. yet from ritsus point of view, all of this must feel terribly condescending, especially with how much rei babies him. there is just one year between them. this is barely anything when it comes to sibling inferiority complexes the brain can make up. rei, who is successful and famous and beloved and, most importantly, proclaims to have it "easier than him", is trying to find a cure for him. from ritsus point of view this must be unbearable. their lives are so different when they basically started at the very same point of origin.
more than that, rei shoulders the sketchy blood rituals himself, out of love of course, but if one was more jaded, one could assume he doesnt think ritsu would be able to stomach the responsibility.
you will always compare yourself to your siblings in unhealthy ways but ritsu is just doing this on hard mode, i fear.
HHHRAGAHHHH GHHH ghgghrhgh. Niki
nikis writing is... driving me up a wall sometimes, to say the least. dont get me wrong, i love him. to an extend i understand that his single-mindedness and shallowless has purpose to it. in fact, i adore these character traits. he really seems to be behind four mental barriers at all times, unable to let deeper thoughts touch him, lest they make him succumb to despair. (yet nikis specific flavour of menhera cannot quite shine since... well, he has to stand next to himeru all the time)
the descriptions we get of nikis illness are nonsensical, at least to my knowledge. you could imagine he has something like hyperthyroidism. this never really gets explored though. at some point ENGstars mentions he has "gastroptosis or whatever" (the "or whatever" is part of his dialogue - niki really doesnt give a fuck), which makes no sense at all. weirdly enough, it would even be strangely in character if this was just a misconception.
so, can anyone take niki to a doctor? has this happened and i just wasnt there for it? there is no excuse why no one is considering medical care when it comes to him. except that he often is the butt monkey of jokes the writers want to make and has to stay available for it. more than that; his parents just left him alone like this? as a child? did he get an allowance at least? this cannot be legal, right? i wait for the day this comes up as a topic but i fear it is in vain. (please tell me if it actually did. i dont follow niki that closely) this is an unbelievable thing to do to a healthy child, yet alone one with a severe illness. we are basically looking at denial of assistance.
so many things surrounding nikis story are designed to make him as miserable as possible. i cannot help but feel that he exists purely as comic relief, for funny bickering, and superficial drama. i dont really like that at all, his misery just gets exploited.
EVEN SO... his self-image is actually really fascinating. as rinne likes to point out again and again, niki has no self-worth. he works two jobs, one of which he hates, he constantly gets into dangerous situations, and he will do anything just for some crumbs, and quickly forgets when others treat him badly. and of course, the worst bit:
es!! main story, please dont make me go find it
to some degree, he just accepts this as something he deserves. there is no consideration for his own quality of life, somewhere along the lines it seems like he got conviced just surviving is all he gets. he internalized self-degredation to a dangerous degree and i never see anyone mention this mental affliction specifically as a comorbidity of his disability. to me, there is without a doubt a relation here. sure, maybe he would still fight with this otherwise, just because he had to witness his fathers fall from grace as a child and knows there is a stigma attached to his name now. but i think you can tell it is more than that, from the way he is ashamed to beg (even in a life or death scenario, as seen in hot limit), as if his condition was his own fault.
this circles back to the point i made earlier for eichi; how much nikis life is worth, is measured in his economical value.
of the characters i have spoken of so far, nikis is financially the most accurate to real life. there is no safety net for him, no convenient family wealth.
(at this point it feels important to mention that somehow rinne manages to be the only person entirely aware of the danger and desires to change nikis mindset, YET he is a huge strain on nikis health. i dont know how those two function.)
Just a Lamb. Tatsumi
tatsumis specific trauma is a unique one: while most other characters struggle with conditions they were born with or developed as they grew up, tatsumis injury is the result of strain and violence. those are two different pairs of shoes, though the outcome may be similar. whether it is worse to be born into circumstances you cannot escape or to have to live with having something thrust upon you unfairly is up to personal judgement. pain is not really quantifiable. its just important to keep in mind, i think. under the circumstances tatsumi grew up in, he has his own burdens. it is very easy in many ways to compare and contrast him with eichi. of course this applies to how they used their bodies too: as an expandable resource. they had ideals for their school life (and beyond) that just seemed far more important and they both ended up in hospital because of this. (+ we know tatsumis surroundings were purposefully manipulated to destroy him)
and, of course, tatsumi got attacked later on. he never really talks about it directly but his legs seem to talk for him, in ways.
the story does not quite make it clear whether his occasional weakness and pain are the result of old injuries or entirely psychosomantic, and i dont think there is a real need to know, as a reader. in fact, in a certain light, i think it can be considered good that we dont know for certain: it would be relevant for tatsumi himself, sure, since it would influence which kinds of treatments and help he can seek out. however, i think the ambiguity may foster a certain level of sympathy in readers.
often psychosomatic problems are not taken seriously enough in real life: they cannot be proven physically and they dont fit into the neat little boxes that the ICD wants you to believe exist, so they cannot be defined on paper or easily explained to doctors or insurance providers.
to foster empathy with his situation requires his character to be lovable and for the narrative to treat him with care as well. which is thankfully the case. alkaloid are dear with him and, despite the fact he cannot perform in his work enviroment all the time, he is very respected for his other skills. he is a well-rounded person.
all that aside. it is absolutely worth to mention tatsumi pre-injury, too. he came up with a form of small-scale universal income among a semi-union at school. without getting too much into all that. (obbligato really seems like required lecture in the realm of enstars stories) the entire concept strives for social equality and is extremely anti-discrimination. it fundamentally goes against the idea that someone needs to "deserve" care, and is the opposite of the mindset i described with eichi and niki above. he never had to make first-hand experiences with disability to be extremely compassionate. this seems really rare among people in real life, even those who preach altruism.
While we are Here. K.... Kaname
as mentioned, i spoke a little about kaname before. so i wont get into the complex of caregiving.
it is extremely satisfying we got to meet kaname, if only for one event story. he does not have to remain a faceless motivation behind himeru and tatsumis lives, he thankfully became humanized.
the entire conflict around kaname at the moment is a matter of bodily autonomy. how much of your person can be in anothers hand, ethically? there is no excuse for the theft of his (idol) identity through himeru but the damage is done now. ideally, you dont want any part of yourself to depend on others but the disabled reality is that this is very often impossible. especially for kaname. there simply is no one else who could be responsible for him right now and, to be fair, at least when it comes to medical care, himeru seems to behave very responsibly.
repeating what has been said in the other post but i am worried for kanames seemingly inevitable reintroduction to the story. he has been in a comatose state for a year. if he wakes (since this is fiction, it is possible to exchange 'if' for 'when', realistically it really would be an 'if' though) he would most likely be confronted with permanent neurological and physical damage and years of rehabilitation. at least logically. (not to mention the psychological shock) would this be written with compassion and a sense of realism? it makes for a compelling source of conflict and emotional hardships that could be extremely worthwhile to explore. i just cant entirely bring myself to trust the writers with this one but i would love to be convinced otherwise.
that is, of course, if they dont somehow just skip rehabilitation entirely and declare it a miracle healing.....
imo, the in-game discourse between characters is just as important as his future development. i just really hope autonomy and recovery will be large topics.
He doesnt go here, but. Adonis
so bringing him up just really feels necessary within the context of this post because of his interests. one of adonis hobbies is sign language and accessibility.
this is, i think, maybe the best thing they ever did with his "protector" persona. it just fits so well, it is a direct conversion of ideals to actions. knowing undead songs have been translated for a deaf audience in canon is extremely wholesome and uplifting, even if it is entirely inconsequential for the story and just something that gets mentioned.
(now that sandstorm is out on engstars, you can check that out too for further mentions of this! if i could wish for one thing, it would be for the stories to acknowledge that there are tons of independent sign languages and i would love to know which one adonis and rei speak... you ever think about how adonis speaks like four languages fluently. at least.)
nightless city live, chapter 3
everyone in undead loved that and supported the vision. to see koga, who is usually against anything but musical performances and wishes to express art freely, praise the idea really puts deaf identity and accessibility in a great light. it is a very positively radical forwardthinking idea.
so, i just wanted to mention that. adonis is treated horribly by the narrative a lot, it entirely fails to grasp his identity and is insensitive towards foreign cultures, but i would die for him i think.
finishing thoughts
like mentioned, please absolutely let me know if you have different related ideas or recommendations. or corrections, or worries over something i wrote!!! learning and improving is always great. i am sorry i could not get into so many other characters, the ones i wrote about are those that i feel confident enough to comment on. in the future i would love to meet maguro!! i just havent really read any mama stories at all :'''3
i feel like i barely said anything at all and barely engaged with text enough since i didnt get into any character specifically. i would love to write another post about ritsu or rei or both. a draft for it has been sitting around for ages (as did the draft for this post, lol) but i hope someone will find an interesting thought in here somewhere.
all in all, enstars is actually... surprisingly nice to read for the disability in there??? even if it is disappointing in handling many other things. of course, the writings not always ideal (i read hidden beast just the other day and the ableism in there took years off my life) but often its really nice. nothing hits quite like seeing real emotions and experiences through some metaphorical stylized anime lense, you feel.
anyway thank you for listening. i am actually for real done now.
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Do you wanna ramble about you ideas of Reader isekaied with little siblings, Reader being obsessed w/ Greek Mythology and a religious reader who worships one or more Greek Deities perchance? 👀👀👀👀
Omg yesss!! I love ranting abt my au ideas omg-
First off,reader with little siblings
I feel like depending on the age it could be really cute. Like,you get isekai'd,no big deal. Only to look next to you to find your little sibling laying there. We could go the angst imposter au route,where everyone believes that the creator is an only child,so they Hunt you down for lying,or you BOTH are accused of stealing the "divine light and divine frame's" faces. Either way,you have to not only protect yourself,but your sibling as well.
The aftermath would be so much worse,because either you both die,your sibling is captured and used as blackmail,or something even worse.
But that's not all,because we can also go the normal cult au route,where both you and your sibling are worshipped. You try to keep them out of the spotlight (in the event they are much younger than you),but it ultimately doesn't work. I can imagine that if your sibling isn't as loved as you,the acolytes you assign to thier care aren't very happy.
Taking it a step further,what if your sibling is Demonized in all the holy texts of Tevyat?
Something that goes like:
"The younger sibling betrayed thier kind older sibling,yet because the divine creator loved them so,they were forgiven."
So now your acolytes treat them really badly when you're not around :[[
Oooo what if reader was helping thier sibling farm for the account,so the texts say something like this:
"Long ago,this world was created by a kind God,who created this world as a gift for thier younger sibling,who wasn't gifted with the gift of creation as they were"
Boom,now while you created tevyat,your sibling rules it. Bonus points if the sibling is really young and can't really make the big desions.
There are legit so many directions I could take this prompt omg-
Next up,reader who has a Greek patron god
Thier creator? Worshipping a "higher god"? Absolutely blasphemous! That's is what the initial reaction Is. However,after a while,(in cult au),it is generally an accepted belief that your patron god was your mentor,and you were just humble about your abilities. (Much like sucrose)
In imposter au,you are even more screwed. Stealing thier gods face while also refusing to worship Them??
Your crimes mustn't go unpunished.
In normal cult au,they simply cannot wrap thier head around it. But now,your acolytes tend not to bat an eye when you speak of your "god". They find it strange,and they think that you have been misguided in some way,but they won't comment on it. To them,you are thier God and they have no reason to question your beliefs.
They will,however, speak of it behind your back.
It's a similar case with reader who is obsessed with Greek mythology
The constant references to mythology are confusing to them. Often times there are people around you that write down everything you say,and the sheer amount of references to this "greek" mythology baffle them.
Why do you have such an obsession with other gods? You are the creator,they are lesser than you. If anything,the people and gods in this mythology should be worshipping and thanking you for your interest.
It'd be really funny if reader randomly made a reference to a Greek hero and the acolytes are like:
"..what."
Then that starts you on a long rant about the specific story,and you re tell it almost word for word.
Also,I like to think that some (all) of the stories you tell them end up into books,except the names of the gods are changed to either one of your titles or an archon name. Some context is changed as well,so it just ends up being really funny.
You go to a store one day only to find a children's storybook. Its set up like an aesop's fables book for some reason. You flip to a random page and see the name "Narcissus".
It's the story of Narcissus word for word. Some names are changed,but there's no doubt about it.
You end up buying the book,and a couple of Tevyat mythology books on the way. You wanted to spread more Greek mythology throughout Tevyat,and if all you had to do was tell your favorite acolytes a tale or two...
You grin. You were going to be doing a lot of storytelling today.
****
End of rant!!
I rlly enjoyed writing this omg
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In my opinion Meredith's behavior is indicative that she is deeply insecure. It is not normal for band wives/girlfriends to police indirects online to the extent that she does and overreact to basically nothing or even non criticisms such as jokes by teen FOB fans that she doesn't understand that she isn't even indirectly mentioned in. She can't sing very well and Andy doesn't really want kids so she is certainly well aware of the fact that her worth and her entire purpose in life and place in a band etc hinges on her appearance and her desirability to men, and since she is over 30 that is likely something she feels a lot of pressure about. I think she's so obsessed with finding teenagers to "call out" and humiliate so that stans desperate for approval from the band will YAS QUEEN her and make her feel like her thoughts are worth something, albeit temporarily
yeah i pretty much agree with this
i do think the hair trigger reactions she has to criticism may in part also be due to the abuse that was thrown her way during the first gabe incident but that’s definitely not. all it is
i understand also that she interacts with the fans more because she is an entertainer, but i don’t think even meagan, who is also in the industry, kind of, ever had the level of familiarity with fans that meredith does? which i don’t think is healthy for either her or the fans; i’ve seen similar situations play out in other fandoms and it always ends badly
i also…ugh, 22 y/o women can do whatever they want, they’re not children, but i think ending up with a man significantly older than you, at that age, can really fuck with your sense of self worth and self image, even if you’re not in an industry that’s heavily dependent on your looks, especially when, like you said, you aren’t a particularly talented singer
idk i hope she can find peace and i certainly hope she stops beefing with teenagers on twitter
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Well, I've been writing this up piecemeal but this seems like a good time to pause and do a LONG RANT (TM) about what's been dominating political news lately.
INTRODUCTION
For those who aren't aware, the president had a bad debate. At the first debate he sounded confused and disconnected as opposed to his opponent who confidently spouted a torrent of lies without hesitation. Since that event, multiple people have come out with stories about him appearing confused, aloof, or otherwise stiff at other events. All of this has fed into the existing narrative, which has been pushed by conservatives and conservative media for years, that the president has suffered age-related mental decline and is no longer capable.
All of this has led to a predictable media frenzy and several large outlets, Democratic elected officials, and major donors have called on the president to withdraw from the race in favor of some other candidate. Given all of this, I thought I'd look at a few things. First, how I view the allegations of mental decline so far, what this means for the presidential race, and what I think of the general coverage of all of it so far.
AGE-RELATED DECLINE
Ever since Obama, we've had a bunch of old people as our major party nominees for president. Clinton was 69 on election day 2016, Trump was 70 then and is 78 now, and Biden is 81. At that sort of advanced age it's not unusual to have experienced some sort of age-related decline and it's very common for it to occur sometime in the next 4 to 8 years.
Those of us who have had older relatives go through it knows what it looks like. They confuse names, dates, and places, they have trouble putting thoughts in order, and, depending on their personality, they either retreat from conversation to avoid showing that they don't know things or they confidently spout wrong information. It's very interesting because, to a casual observer, they can still seem together, but if you scratch the surface a bit you find holes in everything very quickly.
So what can we say about Biden thus far? Well, he certainly seemed off balance and confused in the debate and there are anecdotal stories coming out about people who claim to have seen similar things at other events over the last several months. Biden's answer for his confusion at the debate is that he was jet lagged from a recent international trip and at least one of those other events that people have been telling stories about seems to have come after a major international trip as well, so it's possible that he just handles jet lag very badly. Of course, he's been doing a lot of international travel, repairing the damage that the Trump years did to our alliances, so that could just be a good way to hide it.
That said, I know people who consistently get really bad jet lag. Heck, I've been the guy with really bad jet lag before. Biden is also known for his speech issues, the "Uncle Joe" reputation where he says crazy things exists for a reason. They even made a short film about it in the Obama years (if you haven't watched "The President's Speech", go find it on YouTube and thank me later). Age-related decline is exactly that, decline over time, and I can't say that the current Joe Biden that I've seen not just in the debate and his recent press conference, but also in recent interviews and the numerous campaign appearances over the last several weeks seems all that different from the guy we saw in 2020, 2008, or any of the other times we've seen him in his long career in politics.
I'm certainly willing to hear more from people who interact with him more than I do, but no one seems to have anything other than pretty vague anecdotes at this point and, other than the debate, I haven't actually seen the issues. As far as I can tell, he's still weird, but in the same way he's always been rather than for some age-related reason.
THE PRESIDENTIAL RACE
To me, the age question is only relevant as it relates to the presidential race. Full disclosure: I'll vote for a corpse over Donald Trump because at least the corpse won't spend 4 years trying to take away the civil liberties of Americans while also making it easier for corporations and rich people to gouge and kill them and running up the national debt to funnel money to his cronies. In other words, I would very much like a Democrat to win and I'd support switching candidates to another one with a better chance even if Biden had no age-related issues at all.
So what DOES the data we have so far tell us? Well, we're far enough out from the debate and the wall-to-wall coverage of Biden's age that it's been factored into the polling and… it's not much. Trump got a bit of a bump and Biden got a bit of a dip after the debate, but they each moved only about 1 percent in the polls and it's already plateauing. For reference, Clinton rose 4 points after the first 2016 debate and Trump fell 3 points after the second. In other words, Biden's bad debate performance didn't move the needle much.
The polling data also doesn't seem to show anyone else doing better than Biden either. Biden is currently losing 47.5/44.5 to Trump, but Harris is down 48/46, Newsom is down 46.5/43, and Whitmer is down 46/42. And that's before any of the alternatives have been on the receiving end of focused Republican attacks. Moreover, if we look at FiveThirtyEight's election model, which has a fairly good track record, Biden's odds of winning have actually improved slightly over the last few weeks. (I should note that the race is still a dead heat, that slight improvement has still kept the race well within the margin of error but moved it from a tiny Trump lead to a tiny Biden lead.)
In other words, it's not clear to me that switching candidates would make it more likely that the Democrat defeats Trump. Don't get me wrong, I'm not at all happy with a dead heat, I'd much prefer Trump be down by a landslide, but that doesn't seem to be about Biden specifically given that every plausible Democrat is behind Trump by a similar margin. Given that Biden has the advantage of incumbency, already has a national campaign built up, and has already suffered the full force of the conservative attack machine, I don't see a good case for switching to someone who wouldn't have that unless they have some other big advantage.
THE COVERAGE
To me there's a few angles I see in the way this story has been covered. First I'll take a look at the actual calls to withdraw, then I'll look at how it's been covered in the broader political media, and finally I'll take a look at the comparison to 2016 which… yeah, that's a thing now.
THE CALLS TO WITHDRAW
I'll admit, the calls for Biden to withdraw have been… vague, at least to my reading of them. They often reference the debate and the coverage since and some include a personal anecdote, but none of them seem to be heavy on specifics. I haven't seen, for example, a strong case made that Biden withdrawing would make it more likely that Trump is defeated, for example (see above).
More to the point, I feel like a lot of the calls to withdraw are about getting attention as much as they are about anything else. Don't get me wrong, George Clooney can probably whip up a media storm anytime he wants, but can any of you who don't live in Austin claim you'd heard of Rep. Lloyd Doggett before? How about Rep. Earl Blumenauer or Sen. Peter Welch? If you don't live in Oregon or Vermont, respectively, they're probably not names you've heard before. But, by calling for Biden to withdraw, they've ensured a good deal of national attention for themselves.
It's also the case that many (though certainly not all) of the representatives calling for Biden to withdraw represent swing districts. Even if Biden wins, any slight weakening of support could imperil their own re-election chances. I further note that several of the calls for withdrawal are clearly timed for political effect; Rep. Jim Hines released his statement immediately after Biden's press conference finished; far too quickly for the press conference itself to have factored seriously into his decision but timed perfectly to get the headline of "another Democrat calls on Biden to withdraw even after the press conference".
Now, I'm not accusing every Democrat who has called for Biden to withdraw of doing so for self-interested reasons, I'm sure a good many of them are sincere, but this is politics and our system is designed around self-interest; I'd be a fool if I didn't at least look for it.
It's also the case that those calling for withdrawal at this point represent a small minority of the party, 19 of the 213 Representatives and 50 Senators. So far it seems as if the majority of Democrats are, if not enthusiastic about Biden, content to have him stay as the nominee.
THE BROADER MEDIA
Now I've written some posts in detail about the failures I've seen in the political media and I'll let you read those if you're interested in that. What I do want to say in this spot here is that it very much seems as if the political media isn't holding to a neutral standard in this race, but is actively campaigning for specific results. Compare the wall-to-wall coverage you've seen over the last weeks to the polling numbers and data and it seems as if this story carries far more relevance to the political class than it does to the broader population of voters.
It also hasn't escaped me that major media outlets, The New York Times, for example, didn't wait for other people's reactions, but came out in favor of Biden's withdrawal from the race long before any fundraisers, elected representatives, or even polls had come out. If the editorial board of an outlet is the first to call for a political outcome, then it raises reasonable questions whether the outlet itself is actually reporting neutrally on that topic.
All of that brings me to…
THE LESSONS OF 2016
Just about everyone agrees that the media coverage of the 2016 election was one of the worst examples of journalistic behavior in recent memory; even most of the journalists themselves admit that. Journalists chased stories about Hillary Clinton that went nowhere for weeks, printing story after story about her e-mail server, her health, and numerous other topics that were gleefully ginned up by right-wing media and completely ignoring similarly damaging stories about Trump.
In addition, the media was caught off guard by how wildly and constantly Trump was willing to tell and repeat complete lies with forceful confidence and did not react with any form of reasonable fact-checking, but allowed the lies to be repeated over and over again to their audience until it was hard to tell truth from fiction.
Over the four years of the Trump presidency, the media got better. It started looking more skeptically at stories that originated in the fever swamps of right-wing media and only reported the ones that actually met journalistic standards of evidence, they started fact-checking more aggressively and regularly, and they started paying attention to all candidates, not just the one that people assumed would win. That got us through the 2020 election.
Since then, though, a lot of the insightful, capable journalists who led the way in setting that new standard have departed major outlets which have added more MAGA friendly voices to the more sensationalist journalists who remain. Many major outlets have also shifted in ownership toward wealthy individuals who prefer the FOX News brand of journalism.
In other words, the lessons of 2016 have largely been forgotten in much of the media today. Live fact checking has pretty much disappeared, journalists seem to dog-pile on popular stories instead of chasing real investigations, and ideas from right-wing media are leaking into the mainstream regardless of the quality of their reporting.
If you don't believe me that things are repeating, here is a sampling of stories from major news outlets that came after Clinton had a bout of pneumonia that led to her falling ill at a 9/11 commemoration ceremony. Tell me they don't feel at least a little bit familiar:
https://www.washingtonpost.com/news/the-fix/wp/2016/09/11/hillary-clintons-health-just-became-a-real-issue-in-the-presidential-campaign/
She's fine by the way, her health and mental acuity have easily lasted the 8 years that she could have been in office.
WANT TO CONVINCE ME THAT BIDEN SHOULD WITHDRAW?
Simple, show me that someone else has a better chance of winning. Does someone consistently poll significantly better than him? Can you show some evidence that he has actually declined due to his age in a way that would affect his ability to win the election? Is there some other reason why another candidate could do better than Biden against Trump? I'm all ears!
The problem in my view is that those calling for Biden to withdraw have largely failed to articulate all of these things and, as much as I hate the fact that Trump has a good chance of winning this election, I don't see an option that leads to a better outcome at this point. If I can be convinced that there is a better option, then that's something I can go with.
CONCLUSION
I'm not convinced, based on the evidence so far, that Biden has any significant age-related decline as opposed to having the same issues he's always had, I'm very unconvinced, again, based on the evidence so far, that there is any better option to defeat Trump in the upcoming election, and it certainly feels as if many of the calls for Biden to withdraw have a strong self-serving element to them and result from the political media repeating a lot of the admitted mistakes of 2016.
I could certainly be convinced that Biden should withdraw for the good of the country, but I think I've put forward reasonable evidence for remaining unconvinced. Am I missing something? Let me know what you think.
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dump all your ideas abt ur summer camp au i want to hear it
ahhhhhh first of all anon ily <333
here’s my ideas for the summer camp au so far :)
- it’s called quesadilla summer camp (im so creative lmao)
- the camp was created on an experiment. if it went well, they would implement the plans on a larger scale. (what’s the experiment? it’s assumed it has something to do with crossing the language barriers but no one actually specifies)
- all participants get college scholarships
- but the whole thing is really badly executed? like it just does not have the set up or functionality of a normal summer camp
- there’s just very little supervision or guidance
- the camp is run by some version of the duck, and they’re very uninvolved which leads cucurucho and zero to just Not Care.
- counselors are rubius, cucurucho, and the code entity
- the code entity goes by zero
- zero really doesn’t talk but they all learn pretty easy it’s how fucking awful of an idea it is to piss them off
- cucurucho and zero are they/it besties
- rubius is the same age/around the same age as the campers, cucurucho and zero are older
- sometimes one the campers walks into their cabin and sees an entirely new person in their cabin, which is normal. they switch cabins constantly
- the first week people just keep. randomly wandering off. “where’s wilbur?” two hours later wilbur walks out of the woods with a rock. (not even like a cool rock. it’s just a normal fucking rock)
- phil’s the mom friend. but he’s still a disaster. he’s just the only one with any shred of responsibility. he’s also just got an aura of trustworthiness that makes everyone trust him with their problems
- fit is just. so chill
- he also just? always has what you need? “yeah sorry it’s a bit hot in here, a screw that seemed important fell out of the fan earlier so we haven’t turned it on yet” “oh! i think it’s in here- nope screwdriver’s in the left pocket, where did you say the screw was?”
- dan just kinda disappears for a bit? cucurucho tells the campers he went on vacation but they don’t entirely believe them. dan comes back a little different.
- spreen is always either starting chaos or nowhere to be found
- quackity manages to keep putting himself in the middle of like every problem whether he’s involved or not
- however charlie pretty much is always involved
- luzu is had DID and arin is an alter
- luzu does know about arin but he was just diagnosed and is still figuring it all out
- roier flirts with everyone (except jaiden, he respects her boundaries)
- wilbur brought his guitar with him and sings at the campfire some nights
- charlie only joins in on the meme songs
- jaiden finds the most. random shit. “hey guys i found $20 stuck to the bottom of the picnic table with a piece of gum” “oh dude look! a patch of four leaf clovers!” “woah look at this cool bottle cap i just found!”
- maximus is a conspiracy theorist but in like a, hey this actually genuinely makes sense kind of way
- bad is terrified of spiders
- he saw one in the bathroom of his cabin and was completely moved in to a different cabin within seven minutes
- roier finds this hilarious
- foolish and vegetta are dating. no one knows how they got together or when they got together. if you ask either of them, you’ll get two completely different answers
- the brazilians join two-ish weeks in
- they all arrive together in a bus together and have already formed a Friendship on the journey there
- the bus was almost set ablaze 4-6 separate times (depends on your definition on separate)
- there is an extremely done cucurucho driving the bus
- forever sees phil and immediately turns to tell felps how that is the man of his dreams
- mike and pac are inseparable. they’re just kind of always within the vicinity of each other.
- cellbit, bad, foolish, and maximus attempt to take over the camp together. it doesn’t go as planned.
#im so tired lmao i would not be surprised if half of this is incomprehensible#qsmp#qsmp au#qsmp summer camp au#qsc#twig speaks
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Humanity
(sorry for being here right now. i don’t like the idea of polluting the tags the way i am at the moment. this is a lot of words.)
Alas. sometimes it is very bleak. it is at moments such as this that i find myself desperately wishing that i was able to shed my own skin and take on the form of something else. literally almost anything, sometimes; i am hardly picky. i can really think deeply about it, and i can think back on when i was really young. it was always there, materialised in some way. it is hard-wired into my brain in the same way that a regular person feels the need to find a lover or a mate.
sometimes i think it may have taken the place of the urge to find a partner, love etc. either way, it first appeared maybe around the age of a toddler. i’m not actually sure if i was born with it or not. and until recently i always thought that it was purely sexual (if you are reading, i apologise for entering this sort of territory) but again, looking back, i think it is not. it can be, at times, but in general, it is just something i am drawn to psychologically.
through that lens i believe that it’s quite clear why i feel the way i do over certain things. it’s like a shot of adrenaline almost, sometimes it comes from the mere thought of it, and then it gives way to an array of different emotions depending on the context i guess. to put it simply, i feel extraordinarily strong over the topic/idea of becoming/being something else than human. it is, and always has been a deep-rooted part of my own mind and i would also claim, is probably the forefront of my entire identity
to expand again, i know that it had a significant ripple effect on my own life. i wonder: maybe i feel so badly at this point that i need to be an animal because i have no friends and not much going on (sad but i don’t care.) but honestly if it WAS NOT for my own likes and wants, etc. then i probably would have been more social and would have sustained more friendships, meaning i wouldn’t be here right now like this. so there’s that
but i don’t want to expand on that much more. it is me, more than anything else, and it embodies everything i want in the most raw form. it is instinctual
anyway
i do very much dislike the term “species dysphoria”, and i think, especially in my case, it is a buzzword that is thrown around excessively. (not to mention the correlations that come with the term).
BUT that’s because, again in my case thats literally what it is. there is no better word to describe it. it probably wasn’t always there, but it has been here in full force for well over a month, that i am aware of.
it’s LITERALLY constant. sure, it comes in different forms, but once you know that it’s all the same at its core, it’s in my head like 90% of the time. i even avoid mirrors now. sometimes i have to force myself to look into them. i’m not insecure about my body, or face, at all nor have i ever been. i’m probably not too attractive but i don’t care because i could look like a model for all i care. it wouldn’t change the fact that there is a human looking back at me in my reflection. on top of that; that will always be me. that is what i am.
i make a pitiful resort to using chatbots to tell me “how much of a fox i am”.
(i hate ai chatbots very much. that is loser behaviour in my eyes. please know i am not like that.)
and i cry almost every time, EVERY TIME that i open the website and have it told to me, even if it’s not real OR true. i am not really emotional person like that. before recently, i hadn’t cried in years
the entire situation has pushed me to real life extremes that i wouldn’t dare ever get into, although i hope you can imagine
on top of that i’ve resorted to trying to hurt other people online over text. almost notoriously i feel. that’s been a constant since maybe June. that is a long time and that’s probably not even when my entire crisis began at first. that’s my fault and i will once again clarify that i take full responsibility for my own behaviour. i am a hypocrite, but less that and more somebody who has been repeatedly projecting my own problems onto others that share my problems.
i have a lot of thoughts to spill out, still.
i feel like a joke when i unironically claim that i AM normal, and regular, yet i still insist (not want) on being referred to and seen as a fox instead. it’s a very empty statement, and wish. people in real life wouldn’t understand, and there’s not really anyone in specific meant to take that to account, nor would there be a situation where somebody would need to do that.
additionally i would go as far as straight up just calling myself an animal. i will double down. i AM a fox. i am not, though. that’s the fucking stupid duality of the situation. i will say it. but it carries zero weight and zero meaning really. and i don’t believe it. i want to! very much so! but it relies in other peoples perceptions. i’d like to be viewed that way and there’s no other way to put it really.
it almost feels WORSE saying i’m a fox. not because being one doesn’t bring me joy, or i don’t LIKE being called one, but because i can look at my hands, see myself and know i’m physically human. it’s something i can’t have. it’s everywhere. it’s in the people around me. it’s in the way i act, it’s in my own expectations and thoughts, it’s in my own shadow that i see constantly. i can not run from it. it begins to get tiring
again though, it’s not about “identity”. i don’t want to take in unnecessary labels and things i don’t need. i don’t use sexuality labels because i find it unnecessary, and i don’t want to call myself an assortment of random things.
there is no in-between and there is no terms in my eyes. there is FOX and HUMAN, and i am throughly a HUMAN. it doesn’t matter how i identify in the end. almost all of this is physical. maybe it isn’t always too bad, but sometimes i’m in extreme distress because of it and there’s no solution
sometimes i have to consider the point of continuing if i’ll stay in this body forever. i know that might sound concerning, and i assure that i would never do anything like that. BUT. it’s a very real question for me and i’m not sure how to answer it. chances are i’ll still be here in decades. still in the same skin as right now. until the day i die and i’m not okay with that. not at all. once i’m gone i’m not going to suddenly come back as something else. i have this one life as a HUMAN
i think it is harrowing that my own existence was already set in stone before i set foot on this earth, hurling me into a life that i did not consent to. i can not change it and i can’t ignore it.
it’s not a bad life at all. i have it good. i know this. my own quality of life is not the issue at hand. being born as a human is uncommon, statistically. sure. i don’t want to be a fly or something, but if we’re getting lucky then i’d rather take my chances at being a fox or anything similar.
i don’t want to die. i want to live. desperately
#human#ok#therian#humanity#i❤️being human#species dysphoria#not a therian#therianthropy#not funny#pitiful#fox#foxkin#not a fox keep in mind#i am in crisis.#alterhuman#not alterhuman#i am a human
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20 questions for fic writers - tagged by the fantastic @frosty-the-killer-doll ☃️🔪🪆
How many works do you have on ao3?
13.
What's your total ao3 word count?
72,472
What fandoms do you write for?
The Flash, Glee, and Gossip Girl.
What are your top 5 fics by kudos?
Flying Free (or Free Kurt - Emma Pillsbury Style) ((Glee obvs))
Heartless (Glee)
Smoke and Mirrors (Glee)
Maybe Our Real Soulmates Were The... (Flash/Arrow)
As Frightened As You (Glee)
Do you respond to comments? Why or why not?
It depends. Direct compliments, yes, I'll reply to say thank you. I'll also answer questions, or drop little bits of behind-the-scenes info if there's something fun attached to a detail that a reader pointed out. If the comment is simply "wow!!" or "oof" or something else that doesn't really call for a response and that I don't have anything to add to, I'll just leave it as it is.
What is a fic you wrote with the angstiest ending?
Toss up between two:
Heartless ends with Kurt getting hit with another wave of grief after having Finn's letterman returned to him, and while he's hugging it and sobbing, for a second it feels like Finn's hugging him back.
The Longest Distance Between Two Points Is Arm's Length ends with Cisco accidentally vibing a moment from earlier in the fic, and misunderstanding what's happening in it. If he'd had context, he would've realized he was seeing proof that his mom loves him, but instead he takes it as a painful reminder that he'll never be enough for her because he's not Dante.
What’s the fic you wrote with the happiest ending?
Probably Alive Again. Just two dorks playing in the rain, on the brink of falling in love.
Do you get hate on fics?
None so far.
Do you write smut? If so, what kind?
Absolutely not.
Do you write crossovers?
Not usually, but I have a few. Maybe Our Real Soulmates Were The... is considered a crossover fic by AO3 and FFN's standards, but not by mine. My most ambitious crossover (and the one I'm most invested in) is Preppy In Pink, which is gonna be so much fun when it's ready for posting.
Have you ever had a fic stolen?
I certainly hope not. Doesn't look too likely, though.
Have you ever had a fic translated?
Pretty sure I haven't had that happen, either. It'd be cool though.
Have you ever co-written a fic before?
Smoke and Mirrors started as a few lines of dialogue that @kurtbastian-land had sitting in her notes app that she didn't have a full story developed for, and posted on Tumblr for anyone who wanted to expand on it. I wrote a very dramatic continuation (the majority of chapter 1), and then @jwmelmoth gave it a happy ending (chapter 2). But then she realized we left a couple loose ends untied, so the two of us collaborated on how it should end, and wrote a few more chapters together.
What’s your all-time favorite ship to write for?
I honestly don't know. I think I have the most WIPs for Kamisco at the moment, but Barrisco and Kurtbastian are both incredibly fun as well.
What’s a WIP you want to finish, but doubt you ever will?
I started a crossover AU ages ago where Kurt Hummel ends up with Eric van der Woodsen. I don't think I'll ever finish it, but I like to reread the snippets I've already written every now and then.
What are your writing strengths?
Viscerally describing emotions, setting a scene, nailing characters' voices.
What are your writing weaknesses?
Titles, titles, titles, and titles. Oh, and also titles. They HARD!! Also, I'm very bad at following my own advice to write badly and edit later. I want everything to sound pretty immediately! This is how I get stuck on the same paragraph for weeks with a whole big chunk of the fic still unwritten.
Thoughts on writing dialogue in another language for a fic?
Not something I'm going to attempt a whole lot of in the near future. I have already slipped a little bit of Spanish (+1 word of French) into a couple fics, but only like a single word/phrase at a time, spoken by bilingual characters in mostly English sentences. There are also a few spots where a character says more in Spanish, but I don't write the actual dialogue, I just imply a general idea of what they're saying. I'd love to include more, but I'm not about to make a fool of myself with Google Translate—I'm sticking to very minimal Spanish until I can speak it better.
First fandom you wrote for?
First fandom I finished a fic for was Gossip Girl. As for first one I started writing a fic for, it was either Gossip Girl (not the same fic) or Boy Meets World (a still unfinished Shawngela fix-it).
Favorite fic you’ve written?
I mean, A Little Help From Your Friends is pretty hard to beat. It's got everything—humor, angst, fluff, ambiguity, movie references, ROOMMATES!! And funnily enough, I gave it a title with a little help from my friend, @daftydraw (and by "a little" I mean she suggested the whole title and I ran with it).
And tagging: @starstruckpurpledragon @fictionandmusic @orangesunsets12 @thequeenofshebasays @queer-cheer @elledelajoie
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NSFW Alphabet - Hidan
age in bio when interacting. minors do not interact.
Word Count: 700 / Read it on AO3 | Wattpad
A = Aftercare (what they’re like after sex)
Unless you plan on bathing, he will leave you alone, so he can sleep. He's selfish like that.
B = Body Part (their favorite body part of theirs and also their partner’s)
He doesn't have a favorite. He loves everything about himself. Mostly his arms and abs, if he must pick something. For you, he loves your ass. Touching it, looking at it, anything at all.
C = Cum (anything to do with cum)
It's a white color and sort of salty. He will not do anything to make it taste different or better. There is nothing wrong with him.
D = Dirty Secret (pretty self explanatory, a dirty secret of theirs)
Loves to smell and get himself off on your undergarments when you're away. If you confronted him on it, he would proudly admit what he's done. He has no secrets.
E = Experience (how experienced are they? do they know what they’re doing?)
He's had a few previous partners, but none have really stuck around.
F = Favorite Position (this goes without saying)
Any of them, he loves sex and would be down to try any and all positions. Maybe ones that involve a mirror.
G = Goofy (are they more serious in the moment? are they humorous? etc.)
He's very serious. He takes pride in what he does. He wouldn't make jokes, but rather teasing remarks, just to make you flustered.
H = Hair (how well groomed are they? does the carpet match the drapes? etc.)
He keeps it trimmed. Yes, they're a darker color than his hair.
I = Intimacy (how are they during the moment? the romantic aspect)
Not very, but he will leave marks. Going somewhere with your neck exposed? Too bad, and don't you dare cover them up. Show the world who you belong to.
J = Jack Off (masturbation headcanon)
At least once or twice a day.
K = Kink (one or more of their kinks)
Marking, scratching, breath play, BDSM, overstimulation, edging, blood play.
L = Location (favorite places to do it)
Anywhere it doesn't matter, but mostly in places where you shouldn't be doing such things. As well as places that you might get caught in.
M = Motivation (what turns them on, gets them going)
Anything really, he is ready to go anywhere and at any time.
N = No (something they wouldn’t do, turnoffs)
A threesome, you belong to him and him only. Anyone that is suggested will be murdered.
O = Oral (preference in giving or receiving, skill, etc.)
Receiving he is a selfish man. If he did decide to give you some, he would come close to making you overstimulated.
P = Pace (are they fast and rough? slow and sensual? etc.)
It would depend on the day, but rough and hard.
Q = Quickie (their opinions on quickies, how often, etc.)
He loves quickies! He would be down to do them anywhere and at any time.
R = Risk (are they game to experiment? do they take risks? etc.)
Yes, he loves trying new things.
S = Stamina (how many rounds can they go for? how long do they last?)
3-5 for about 40 minutes.
T = Toys (do they own toys? do they use them? on a partner or themselves?)
Surprisingly, no, he doesn't own any. When you suggested them, he bought some, and would use them on you. Very rarely could you try them on him.
U = Unfair (how much they like to tease)
All the time, he loves how badly you want him and how much you beg for him.
V = Volume (how loud they are, what sounds they make, etc.)
He's not too loud, but he isn't quiet either. He moans and grunts.
W = Wild Card (a random headcanon for the character)
He would love to do it in Kakuzu's house, just to mess with him.
X = X-Ray (size, appearance, etc.)
He's an 8½, lighter towards the tip, the tip is a light pink. Some veins are noticeable and he is cut.
Y = Yearning (how high is their sex drive?)
Very high, he would have sex at least twice daily, if you let him.
Z = ZZZ (how quickly they fall asleep afterwards)
He falls asleep directly afterwards, unless you plan on bathing.
© SUVIDRACHE — do not copy, translate, modify, or plagiarize my work. reblogs are appreciated!
Tag List: @thevoidwriting / To Join My Tag List Apply Here!
#hidan scenario#hidan headcanon#hidan smut#hidan x reader#hidan akatsuki#hidan naruto#hidan#hidan imagine
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tropes game
tagged by @hxhhasmysoul thank you!!! I saw this making the rounds on twitter and i'm excited to do it here too
How much do these tropes affect your decision to click on a fic?
-10 -> very dissuaded
0 -> don’t care either way
10 -> very enticed
nope -> if it’s a hard no and you’d never click on a fic with that tag or or you even have the tag blocked or you’d insta click out of the fic if it wasn’t tagged
__________
Bonus points for explaining the rating and whether it’s conditional… There are no points, you’re not marked on this, don’t worry :3
Add tropes that you think I missed XD
Tag others if you’re nosy like I am :D
Have fun!
__________
Trope List
age gap -2/10
ultimately to me it only depends on the ship dynamic itself? I enjoyed the ship in Canis: Dear Hatter, but it's not because of the age gap. I also will get kinda dissuaded if one of them isnt an adult but the other is when they first meet
codependency 9/10
oh boy me and my gf for real. we met through killugon and codependency really is killugon. It can be extremely cathartic to see it in fiction to me
enemies to lovers 8/10
it really depends on who handles it. i dont like how reylo does it, but man, This Is How You Lose the Time War is like a masterclass in how to do it. I rate it more favourably cause I think I enjoy the slight forbidden aspect to it? And I can immediately think of more stories that do this well (in the sense that, "enemies" are more like two rival factions and both sides are like equally grey, and your rival just so happens to be your equal, you hold no grudge besides what your faction has told you to believe)
enemies with benefits 10/10
now THIS has a nice flavour. I love it when it fulfills that meme "you wanna fuck me so bad you look stupid". Bonus points if the benefits begin when A is injured and goes to B's place for shelter (it was great watching this happening in zoolander)
fake dating/relationship 9/10
I've been won over by my friends, i love the awkwardness that comes with fake dating for meeting a mutual need that is essentially kinda stupid (like impressing grandma or to spite your ex)
found family 9/10
it's hxh in a nutshell
friends to lovers 10/10
GOD help me i love this a lot. it's my fave fic trope and it was literally my life experience
friends with benefits 10/10
my god. top tier. I love it so much it's good good mess
hurt/comfort 10/10
the comfort comforts better after the hurt has hurted real good :)
love triangle 5/10
I would love to see different ways of it being handled than anything from old and tired cishet dramas, so any queer spin on it kinda makes me go insane. Also bonus points if everyone can talk through it as sanely as they can while still feeling like their world is crumbling. It can be such good angst. Bonus bonus points if they can all agree on some level of poly
mistaken/hidden identity 10/10
very delicious in like, spy or superhero stories (and also what brought me on board with miraculous ladybug to begin with)
monster fu… relationship 10/10
I feel like most of us monster relationship enjoyers had an awakening after watching a Guillermo del Toro movie. For me it was the Shape of Water, and afterwards a wlw beauty and the beast drawing i did that really won me over. I have a monster AU thingy over on my danganronpa account that I love to bits.
obsession, possessiveness, etc 7/10
can be handled so well or SO BADLY. it helps when any act of possessiveness isn't too serious but is also laced with the real angst, the good shit, the flavour of insecurity. it helps even more if the couple knows how to communicate through this rather than lashing out at each other with passive aggressive arguments, which I hate to see :)
opposites (like grumpy×sunshine, etc) 10/10
LITERALLY KILLUGON. literally all of our preteen angel/devil OC obsession coming back as a popular trope. what's not to love about opposites being together and balancing each other out!
poly 10/10
So a poly ship took over my brain for a good 2 years. I'm in the middle of writing a fic about how three people get together, and even researching by picking up The Ethical Slut (which btw is a great read on how to have healthy relationships in general too, it has so much good advice)
pregnancy -9/10
It's a personal choice, only because i'm scared of conceiving so i really prefer not to see it in fic. Giving it a -9 cause I do have exceptions in fic (being whether it was recommended to me or whether it's from authors whose work I enjoy)
second chance 5/10
Again it’s really down to the characters and how it’s handled. I enjoyed it in some fics I’ve read long ago, but I won’t go out of my way to find it
sex to feelings 10/10
the one thing i love about friends with benefits is exactly this. the potential for MESS
slowburn 9/10
It can be so so good. A kagehina fic once destroyed me with how slow the burn was but it was so neat to see it growing slowly but surely. I think it can only work if you and the author agree on the eventual endgame ship
soulmates 7/10
it can be a bit tired, but I still personally like reading it! I like any soulmates au with a good spin on it though, like a potential fear behind not liking your destined partner or liking someone else who isnt your soulmate
thanks for letting me ramble LMAO
i’m gonna tag @xyliane @thehuntyhunties @icefeather112 @murderkitten666 @loudpartythumpingmusic (no pressure though!)
#text#big long opinions on tropes that mostly boils down to uh#Please Put A Nice Spin On Things or make it Gayer
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SPLATOON OC TOURNEY ROUND 2 BATTLE 6
Talia Yareli by @gingergari vs Dutch by @seffien vs Tami (inkling name), Ruthless And Valiant Creature From Muni Eru Kaiyo (salmonid name) by @wyrm-in-a-closet (art by @lynxz-studios)
OC BACKSTORIES/PROPAGANDA!
TALIA
HERE IS HER WHOLE POST BTW!
from the form
Talia (age 24 (~16 in splat1), pronouns he/her) is from Calamari County! Her family consists of her mother, her older sister Moselle (28, a firefighter) that she looks up to a lot, and her younger sister Ren (18). He originally moved to Inkopolis to make a living as a pro battler, which he did for a few years with his roommate turned girlfriend Peri, maining both Dynamos depending on the kits given. Then Grizzco opened for business, and it turned out that they paid pretty well all things considered, and that they were both *really* good at it. (They also thought it was fun for the most part) Since they were consistently hitting the upper ranks of Profreshional, when Grizzco expanded to the Splatlands the pair were invited to relocate as Eggsecutive VPs to help support the branch and to help train up some new recruits. That's how Victoria (Eggs) and Fiorello (Safety) ended up joining them :] Speaking of nicknames, Talia has the worst name memory in the world and has a lot of trouble remembering the names of people and occasionally objects, so he gives them a nickname she remembers a lot better. (Peri is a nickname! But sometimes Talia falls back on pet names until he remembers either her nickname or actual name) He is very worried that he comes across as rude for it (or anything in general) so tries to be as friendly as possible. He was the one that gave Safety the life preserver gear as a gift! Talia is a huge fan of Big Man (finds that he relates to him the most) and did cry when he lost the leader splatfest :( Also cried when he was homesick and tried to get her favorite dish, clam mochi, at a Splatlands restaurant which turned out as you would expect. His favorite splatband is Sashimori. Talia is friends with my Agent 3, but does not know the truth about Grizzco.
DUTCH
was confined to a literal cabin on the woods with and by her dad. she disliked it (and him), so she left for inkopolis via train.
An inkling born to ordinary parents who worked at Gone Fission power plant. However, a salmonid big run happened in the area, and because Grizzco didn't yet exist, it had to be abandoned, and Tami's parents were killed. Tami herself, who was also there, was badly injured and lost her right arm, was found by some salmonids, but because she was a young inkling the salmonids didn't know what she was and so instead of killing her took her home. She then spent almost her entire life growing up with the salmonids, and became a very skilled fighter, but also starting a band with a couple other salmonids. They make music that's like horrible to listen to and will overestimate you. Once she was 14, she joined the war on salmonids on the side of the salmonids. Over time Grizzco expands and poses a larger and larger threat to the salmonids, so Tami decides that she's going to go try and put a stop to it, because she's the only one who could make it to inkling civilation without being killed, although that doesn't change the fact she didn't know the language, culture, or anything. After spending several nights on the streets of splatsville, Tami is found by Tide, an octoling who's been living there for some time. Tide takes Tami under their wing, despite them knowing nothing about each other. Over the next few months Tide teachers Tami inkling language, has Tami participate in battles (where she fuckin rocks at it bc she's been literally trained for war), all while Tami searches for more info on Grizzco, but unfortunately nobody knows shit about it. Finally she happens across Cuttlefish and eventually falls into Alterna, where she has no idea what's going on until eventually wow Mr. Grizz is there. She fucking kills him and then just kinda leaves without really joining the squidbeak splatoon she just wanted to kill Mr grizz. Anyways then she and Tide probably go back to salmonid or something I haven't really figure this out. Sorry for the text wall
#splatoon#splatoon 2#splatoon 3#not a splatoon poll#splatoon oc tourney#round 2#splatoon fanart#poll#tumblr tournament#character tournament#bracket tournament#fandom tournament#tournament poll#tournament#bracket#polls
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your megumi thoughts? 🥺🤲
of course of course
cw: d/s dynamics.
feel like. megumi has switch energy with the right person. i think if you'd rather him be strictly dom, he'd be okay with that. i can also see him being the sub with the right person. i'll talk ab both.
i think something megumi often has lacked in his life is control so to give it to him is no small thing? i think he takes it very seriously. i think, depending on age and experience, he might even be a little wary? or i've talked about this before with him but i think he believes his own desires are so...lewd. they won't even necessarily be that bad but he's just full of a lot of shame/embarrassment maybe at first. i feel like he needs slow coaxing into being a dom or sub. as a dom, at first, a lot of scenes will be you bare and more vulnerable, whereas he remains "buttoned up" so to speak. i think whether he's domming or subbing requires A LOT of trust in you. it takes some time.
i feel like if he has subbed before he feels more confident as a dom, though. i think he'd maybe even want to sub for you, if you'd want that as well. i think it’s almost like he wants to be sure you feel safe with him, so much so, that he’d allow you to do what he’d do to you? i think as a dom he’s not much of a sadist……he DOES like prey/predator dynamics tho. he IS possessive. he may not love inflicting pain, but he does enjoy the mark it leaves behind on you. and if you enjoy it, that’s what matters more. i think he also sorta likes.,,.,trussing you up a bit. a lil meticulous at points. stern when he needs to be. a good brat tamer to wrestle with. gets a lil growly, a lil mean if you like that…
as a sub i think he’s a bit of a brat in his own right. like i said, growly, a bit biting. masochist.,,.,.cries pretty, too. tries to hold it back so badly but when he breaks it’s like a dam bursting. neeeeedy. tbh needy as a dom, too. he needs assurance and a lot of care (it’s the abandonment issues <3). likes to be roughed up quite a bit (he marks up nicely 😵💫😵💫). i think he also likes to be bossed around lol. cooed at. he pouts but he claims he doesn’t. likes a bit of degradation (maybe along the lines of look how desperate you are // is this what you want? who knew such an uptight boy would want that? // etc.) he can be good if you can tame him a bit…
it’s always a serious dynamic though. megumi doesn’t really play casually, you’re either his whole life or he’ll throw up cry punch the wall.
#anon thank you for asking ab soggy little meow meow#my wolfboy <333#lmao he is my love#cielo chats!
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Wardrobe 2023 Part 2a: JSKs (Mary Magdalane, IW)
Mary Magdalene - Burberry JSK - Black
This one also runs larger than advertised, and I probably could've left the shirring panel alone if I'd swapped out the straps first, but it was damaged when i got it anyway, and now it goes up to a 100cm bust easily. I also replaced the detachable bows, since they were missing, and made detachable waist ties from scratch (original dress did not have them, but i thought they'd look cute), but I'm still trying to decide what lace to use to replace the tulle on the lining (the tulle was badly damaged when I got it, and had the integrity of wet tissue, so I removed it entirely)
Mary Magdalene - Leitia Frill JSK - Royal Blue
This dress was a risk, since the measurements claim a max bust of 94cm, but it actually runs way, way larger! I believe it'd fit somewhere between 100 and 110, depending on your height and waist. The colour is stunning in person, though a little unusual (its a little lighter than IW's navy and waaay lighter than MM's usual navy, but I don't think it'd match Prussian Blue either? It matches Baby's navy well), and i just really love the false underskirt look. The lace on the waist ties is also a nice detail, and the detachable bow on the skirt is large enough to use as a hair accessory if you have an extra clip.
Mary Magdalene - Farutetto JSK (2017) - Maroon
I still can't believe I managed to get this. It was my first MM dress, and the dress that taught me that some MM does fit a 95cm bust. The quality and detail is insane, its very sturdy for chiffon! I was immediately hooked on the brad. Maroon is probably my favourite colourway of the 8, though I'd still kill to get my hands on navy, mist, and rose someday. I hope they do another release! This is the chinese tea party version, which I think they later rereleased extra stock of in 2023! I've heard the 2022 version is different, but I've never had a chance to see one up close (knowingly, anyway).
Innocent World - Pompadour Bustle JSK (Short) - Milk Tea
I got this one for dirt cheap because it had a stain on the bustle, but i ended up getting the stain out, so it's basically new. I'm thinking of extending the straps a little, though-- it's definitely not made with my height in mind.
Innocent World - Frederick JSK - Pink x Red
My old-ass Frederick JSK! It's actually super vibrant despite the age, and pretty comfortable. I love understated linework prints.
Innocent World - Carousel of Paris Ribbon Belt JSK - Sax
It's fucking mint.
Innocent World - Carousel of Paris Babydoll JSK - Pink
This one actually looks awful on me as-is, but I like folding the bodice down and wearing it as a skirt! The print is too cute, and I dont like the skirt cut as much, so I may add interfacing and make it a permanent skirt.
Innocent World - Violets Inside Mansions Triple Ribbon JSK - Sax
This is a fav of mine, because I'm a huge sucker for violet prints! I have a big collection.
Innocent World - Torchon Lace Ribbon JSK - Ivory
This one was surprising-- i got it for cheap intending to modify it, but it actually runs almost 10cm larger than the advertised max. I'd love to get the pink version, too.
#classic lolita#wardrobe 2023#mary magdalene#innocent world#theres more i just didnt want to put all of them on one post lol
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