#this ask was hilarious

[askgale]

It's been about an hour since Gale so rudely ate Astarion's weed brownie, and knowing the effects of one such brownie, Astarion decides to saunter over towards Gale's tent to see how he's fairing.

"Gale, darling! How has my forever weed brownie been treating you? Has it opened your eyes to the universe yet?"

Aatarion asks teasingly, eyeing the clearly high wizard.

-@astariondisapproves

(In reference to this lil comic https://www.tumblr.com/ratscrap/729232017075666944/gale-eats-astarions-forever-weed-brownie) (also if you're not comfy answering this, feel free to ignore I just love that comic so much it makes me laugh every time it comes across my dash)

*Astarion finds Gale lying on the floor, surrounded by open camp supply packs. Scraps of food litter the floor and strange magical sigils hover in the air, flicking in psychedelic patterns*

Ahhh.... Astarion

Come and look at the weave. Isn't it beautiful, Astarion?

*he stares at it for some time, before suddenly sitting up*

I should message Mystra

[frownyalfred]

thinking about the expert masseuse Alfred hired for the family that is paid a small fortune annually to provide massage services and ignore so, so many things. No questions, no remarks, just quality service and an ironclad NDA that, if broken, would probably topple said masseuse’s entire family line.

Things Alfred is paying them to ignore, in no specific order:

Bruce’s spinal hardware courtesy of Bane :)

weird amounts of muscle on everyone, even the kids (despite them allegedly not working physical jobs)

scars

FRESH scars

the fact that every joint in Bruce’s body clicks when moved/manipulated at the tender age of 42

Olympic athlete level physiques

rotator cuff injuries across the whole family

scars that are definitely from bullets and/or acid splashes

old signs of what looks like torture (Bruce)

Dick’s entire left arm is basically screws and plates (he “fell really bad” once)

every single family member takes deep tissue massage with max pressure with 0 complaints

calluses

no really, the weirdest fucking calluses

[magicicephoenix]

Sun you wont believe it something crazy just happen wait crazy i was crazy once-

driving sun crazy insane!! ft. everyone’s lovely reactions 💕

(context)

[puppetmaster13u]

You know what I need more of? The Batkids completely fucking with the Justice League and their rogues and coming up with stories for their existence.

Like I am talking about the creation of demigods sort of stories, like Loki sort of stories.

Duke has convinced all of Gotham that he's the Bat Signal brought to life and that's why he's never seen at night and why the signal literally doesn't work during the day. He's waiting giddily for the story to spread outside of the city.

The batkids have convinced half the League that Nightwing is quite literally Batman's lovechild with Justice. Hey, Constantine had a one night stand with the manifestation of a city and they've dealt with gods before, so surely it's not that surprising? Right???

I need more of the Batkids being little shits, of Alfred the-greatest-enabler Pennyworth backing them up and Bat(the-biggest-troll)man to never confirm the stories, but he doesn't deny them either.

[toobusybeingdelulu]

Sometimes I think about the kids seeing billy lounging at the pool with a shirt on in s3 and literally going like “oh no, he hasn’t got his tits out, something is wrong!!” and the funniest thing is that they were right

[egophiliac]

I've had a beast of a cold for the last few days, but I wanted to get this out before the new year! while I've sort of made my peace with my first take on Lilia's UM poster, I really wanted to do a version with the new context that chapter 6 gave us. because. c'mon.

(don't worry, Lilia can carry ALL HIS KIDS AT ONCE)

[sharkgirldick]

Need to sit under a girls desk and do some shit that will have her shake like those boomers pretending that Pfizer is giving them seizures

You can just ask to suck my dick if that's what you want, damn

[bestialitybestiary]

That's it. That's Stiles

[shepscapades]

Thanks to artfight, I’ve finally finished a detailed, official dbhc cub reference! :D

(I’ve put his Artifight description below the cut, which has a more detailed explanation of his timeline, lore, and aesthetics! >:3)

-ˋˏ ༻ ❁  OVERVIEW ❁ ༺ ˎˊ-

Name: C.B.F.N.4000 (Cub) Pronouns: He/Him Species: Android Height: 5’9’’ Associated Visual Themes: vex, ghosts, explosions, mischief, scientist aesthetic, potions, potionmaking, sleepy/tired aesthetic, conspiracies

-ˋˏ ༻ ❁  ABOUT ❁ ༺ ˎˊ-

CBFN4000 is an au version of MCYT Hermitcraft’s Cubfan, set in my DBHC (or Detroit Become Hermitcraft) AU! This au is inspired by the 2018 game Detroit Become Human, but not because it really has anything to do with DBH—I simply yoinked the android mechanics and incorporated them into the world of Hermitcraft. It began as a S8 au, and has roughly followed the hermitcraft timeline up to the present! 

Cub was the last android made during Season 8. While many of the hermit androids were made at the beginning of season 8 and a few were made for season 9, Cub was finished and activated mid-late Season 8, around the time when Hermits started noticing the Big Moon. Cub’s model ended up being a sloppy experiment in deviation, as Doc suggested they try to transfer deviancy to an android upon activation to try and avoid traumatic situations that might cause an android to deviate violently or upsettingly, such as Etho’s, Tango’s, or Mumbo’s experiences. While this went relatively well initially, it clearly wasn’t very thoroughly thought out, as Xisuma (who is normally so adamant and detail-oriented when it comes to assuring the androids’ safety with experiments like this) wasn’t truly himself due to external manipulation and mostly left a relatively young-deviant Doc to carry out the project himself. 

Cub, though adjusting to sentience rather well at first, very quickly became wrapped up in the Big Moon happenings on the server, new personality and inexperience to emotions like fear and ignorance completely overwhelming his young system. He became obsessive over the implications and consequences of the Season 8 Moon Apocalypse, joining the Mooners and spreading his conspiracy theories religiously throughout the server as he descended into madness. The insanity was like a virus to his programming, pervasive and all-engulfing, and Cub’s final attempt to free himself from the Moon’s impact with the Earth—to launch himself on a llama into space via potion-powered TNT(insane btw)— left his hands and feet singed and cracked to ruin.

The experiment, considered a horrific failure by a deeply shameful—and more awake—S9 Xisuma, left Doc and Xisuma with the decision to reset him for the new season, and they ended up pairing him with a hermit like they had done with the other androids until they had found deviancy enough to pursue their own projects. So, at the start of season 9 and fresh after a reset, Cub was paired with Scar. Naturally, because Scar is… Scar, Cub deviated almost instantly after being given to him, and very quickly adopted the iconic lazy, stoic, amused attributes normally associated with Cubfan. Scar’s tendency towards mischief and general shenanigans grew instantly on Cub, and the two were an immediate inseparable pair. So much so that when Scar began rambling one day about his Season 5 Hermitcraft Shenanigans (where deals with the Vex may or may not have been involved), Cub immediately stated he was interested in being in on it. Whatever “it” means. It’s unclear if Cub also made a deal with the vex or became connected to them in some other way, but… well, he got Doc’s help to trick out his eyes, hair, and back to best fit the part. Scar is very jealous that he can't magically make himself have the same features to match.

Cub is closest with Scar, but he gets along just as well with any of the other hermits! He’s close with Jevin and many of the other redstoners like Etho and Doc, who are the other two androids I’ve put on artfight!

-ˋˏ ༻ ❁  EXTRAS ❁ ༺ ˎˊ-

Cub's eyes can light up in the dark, and he’s the only android who has edited his programming so that the default state of his LED is white, not blue. It still will go yellow and red if his processors are working particularly hard, but he’s replaced the blue setting on his LED with white to better match the Vex vibe. Cub has all of the vibes of a fae. If that’s anything <3

[bklily]

thinking of comedic ways of how the hell that talk is gonna go

[strangeweaver]

as per my roommates request i have crucified chars zaku in our apartment hallway

[blueskittlesart]

Hello hi I hope you know the "aigis earnestly asking for lesbian sex" post saga lives rent free in my mind. Internalized homophobia speedrun kotone%. Also your art is so pretty

this is fr what playing the end of aigis's route for the first time felt like. I was losing my mind the entire time

[starry-bi-sky]

danyal al ghul memes because i don't think i've done those yet for this au.

(the jason one is in reference to the fanon headcanon/au that Jason and Damian potentially knew each other and interacted while jason was in the league. I've thought about it before in context of this au, but haven't thought about it enough to feel inspired or motivated to make a post exploring the idea)

(diablito means, as you can guess, 'little devil'. while i'm neutral to latino jason, i think the nickname is cute as fuck and was danny's main nickname from Jason. i don't wanna touch that timeline so im not gonna decide how old they were when Jason was there.)

Skulker: i am the ghost zone's greatest hunter! i capture and hunt creatures both rare and dangerous. Danyal: a poacher?? you're a poacher?? you poach animals??Skulker:...i sense i've made a mistake of some kind.

anyways that was the day that Skulker cemented himself as Danny's no.1 opp, and still remains there to this day even if he and Vlad are both viciously fighting for second. Out of everyone in the the AP rogues gallery, Skulker will be the first to be thrown under the bus in terms of 'o shit here comes phantom fucking RUN'.

[sualne]

Will your crocodad au come back? It has an Iron grip around my heart 😭😭

i've been thinking about maybe forgetting posting it vaguely linearly and throwing parts from different arcs whenever i feel like it instead, since it's that damn flashback that got me stuck. i don't know if ppl will vibe with that tho, since i've posted most of what the timeline is supposed to be like it's probably fine/shouldn't be too confusing.

also the timing of this ask is great, i just drew that, inspired by a mom and her kid i saw on the bus today:

[im-totally-not-an-alien-2]

Over the years Tim had lead, taught and helped countless other teens come into thier powers and said teens looked at him like he hung the stars. They admired him greatly and wanted to do something to make thier mentor/big brother figure proud.

So when they found Tims soulmate they were absolutely ecstatic.

Yeah sure, the guy was the child of evil mad scientists and apparently the heir of a creepy fake vampire supervillian but they'd seen weirder couples in the hero community. They just needed to convince him to join the heros side!

Naturally they try to kidnap Danny and he has no idea whats going on other than a bunch of kids in superhero costumes are trying to abduct him. Between his powers as Phantom, that they seem to not know about (thank the ancients that ghosts don't show up well of pictures and that he started wearing a mask) and his own parents paranoid housebuilding techniques Danny escapes them easily.

Danny figured they would leave him alone eventually, right? If not he would have to call the cops for stalking and harassment.

If that didn't work he would just set all the house lazers to stun. Worst case scenario he might have to call the Justice League emergency line and yell at them to come get thier kids.

It would also be funny if he just kicked them out as Phantom

[acis-arts]

More shitten content? :3. And Kali's siblings interacting with said Shitten.

Sure!

This was a drawing idea I wanted to post on the last shitten post, but I didn't end up drawing it

Here's also a few more interactions with Kali's siblings: