#this = exposure to my brain worms

[bisexualrapline]

if love ain’t for us 이걸로 만족할게 i don’t need your touch 너의 사랑이면 돼

for @namchyoon ♡ (cr. namuspromised, dwellingsouls)

[raihyeon]

[swervdcity-arc]

the way you play racial stereotypes has never set well with me. yt people at it again i guess

can everyone point and laugh at this guy please im busy writing my racial stereotypes and being white

[dlnqnt]

:0

[shellxrls]

— r. cameron / reader

warnings: DUBCON — rafe roofies and then rapes reader / unprotected PinV / misogyny / mention of drugs (cocaine & roofies) / mention of virginity / inspiration taken from maddy & nate (euphoria)

synopsis: rafe cameron x fem!reader… sometimes rafe needs to slip a girl a little something at a party to get some, and where’s the shame in that if he knows they want him anyway, they’re just too prudish to admit it.

After you’ve successfully been dosed, he makes you sit on his lap for lack of space on the couch so he can rock you on his knee until you’re tired, delirious, and horny enough to be lifted upstairs, legs dangling against his broad back while you hiccup and giggle next to your upside-down view of his chest.

His nose is numb from the coke and his brain heady, one could argue almost as inebriated as you. But the lines make him oversaturated, not cock-dumb like what he slipped you — eager hands already pawing at his zipper and coming to a fumbled close around the metal just before you’re tossed onto a bed, spread aloof like the crumpled sheets.

“You’re sooo nice to me Rafe.. when all the other guys were sayin’i shoulda gone home,” you end with a belligerent nod of your head, slurring throughout and biting your lip in sexless embarrassment, chewing the skin raw enough to reflect your torn consciousness instead.

Rafe simply smirks, chin protruding outwards while his eyes flit between your thighs peeking through your overridden dress and your tits falling out of the frilly décolletage.

“You a virgin?”

“Mhm” you lie, despite the reeling dizziness occupying your headspace. Besides, nobody likes a whore — especially not rafe, uninterested in ‘stretched out pussy’ as you vaguely recall from his earlier conversation crowded around friends.

He approaches closer now, knocking your trembling knees apart with one of his beefy thighs, bulge forward and creasing in his pants as your dialogue gets him hard already, imposing his physicality in all its glory: “What like— you’ve never even been fingered before?”

You shake your head, tousling curls before staring back up at him, “Only my own.”

To that he chuckles, the noise grating and stunted when he uses it as an excuse to adjust himself in his pants, drawing his chest down further until he’s now hovering above you.

“Uh y’know,” he tongues at his cheek, “I could take care of that for you, practically all spread open an’ready huh?”

Like it wasn’t his plan to get you dumb and stuffed by the end of the night, even if it meant bringing out his inner brute, he was taller, faster, stronger — he could do it if he really wanted, but he made it easy for you instead. Could feel the roofie worming its way into your consciousness, jamming rationality and flooding you with hedonistic desire that would trigger your sex endorphins and make it so that you would want this, that he could brag about it without you opening your bitch mouth the next day and claiming ‘rape’; an ugly word anyways, coming out harsh in a spit, nothing like what rafe was doing to you, especially not with the way you were looking at him.

Your mouth opens, then closes, seemingly flailing on confirmation when really your jaw is getting slack and numb, and so you feel encouraged to nod instead, the movement making your thoughts go all bubbly, refracting Rafe’s glinting eyes at your ‘consent’.

He wastes no time with prep, shoving your dress up so it’s tucked over your tits, basal temperature remaining warm and stuffy despite the exposure to cool air. A good indicator though, means rafe can tell it’s working, and just how long he has before you might start struggling.

When he pulls himself out of his shorts it’s surprising, of course, everything about him is pretty, one would expect a tangible reflection of the cruelty on his features but instead, his dick looks cutesy, if not for the intimidating size.

Spit trickles harshly down his palm when he wraps a hand around himself, tugging quickly and using both his legs to split you around his midriff, leaking and achy despite the inattention you’ve received.

“You want this dick so fuckin’ bad huh,” he laughs at the puddle of arousal leaking out underneath you, considers swiping a finger into it to stick into your mouth but he doubts you’d be able to breathe right now if he interfered with the half catatonic features on your face, and it’s not like he’s out for that type of violence anyways (or at least not right now).

When he pushes himself inside you’re silent, pupils retreating in favour of a squeal — ironically a very Rafe-esque trait — while Rafe bites down into his cheek and rolls his palm over your chest to ease the pressure of the fit.

“Thought the roofie woulda loosened you up a bit..” mumbled out while his stomach clenches, now bracing his entire heavy arm across your abdomen and pinching skin when you involuntarily quiver at the weight, “You can take it c’mon.”

He thrusts hard and uncoordinated, fucking like he knows he’s hot, or at least how many more pills he has left in his stash. Knocking against your insides and entirely focused on the way his dick feels, knowing how easily he could move onto another victim, and just how much he wants to enjoy you in particular before it’s over.

Sweat clings to both your bodies, the slick getting louder when each thrust manages to pound a squelch out of you, spattering against the sheets or catching on Rafe’s balls to stick the both of you together with messy tendrils.

You’re pliant, let him move your legs so your ankles entwine behind his back, heavy hand locking them together and giving you both little breathing room; just enough for him to spill obscenities straight into your emotionless face with hot, sticky breath — he laughs, manically and seemingly at his own joke, before deciding to share it with you, “just don’t go running ‘bout me ‘assaulting’ you right. You wanted this, not my fault my cock’s so good the slut has to go dumb hmm?” mocking you with a teasing lilt and a raised brow.

You pat at his swollen chest, it’s all you can manage to do, urgent to get him off you, give you a little space atleast. He only shoves himself in further, lips puckering to sloppily catch yours, saliva straying down your chin and jaw instead.

Your outright discomfort seems to get him going even more, thrusts increasing in increment despite becoming more careless, tip catching your clit when he slips out and hurries to stuff it back in.

When his face pinches up, brows tensed and nose furrowed, you can tell he’s going to cum, the friction between your bodies almost unbearable with the heat that suddenly envelops him.

A slew of curses are hissed out, casual vulgarity being one of Rafe’s favourite expressions of self, and then he’s pulling out and wrapping a fist around himself to paint your tummy white. Ropes shooting watery on your tummy and painting him a proud picture.

He shakes himself off on you a final time before tucking his wet dick back into his briefs, cleaning himself up entirely unbothered by the dissected mess of you laying drugged and fucked out on the bed.

“My head feels funny.”

“Yeah, that’s cause I fucked it out of whack.” He says it serious but you can imagine his upturned lips at his own sick sense of humour.

“Where are you going?” you sit up groggy, chest tight.

“Uhh, back downstairs, got some more yayo I needa lay off— you can stay here or.. wherever, doesn’t matter.”

He has the decency to shut the door fully when he leaves, yet you’re still alone and forced to lay in the waste of one of Rafe Cameron’s nights out.

[son1c]

Hi, I love your blog!! Your art and ideas are so cool!

I know it took Starline hundreds upon hundreds of tries to worm his way into Sonic's mind, but I was wondering how much time did it actually take Starline to make Sonic stop actually fighting him and believe in the fake memories. Weeks? Months? (kinda curious what was Sonic's thought process during the whole thing, but that feels like another can of worms lol)

Also I had an idea how Starline could make Sonic reluctant to leave Snowpoint even more - what if he made Sonic's "friends" have very emotional reactions to the idea of Sonic leaving? Maybe Cherry could be sad because he feels like Sonic is abandoning him, Sonic's "rival" could be pissed because no one else can keep up with them so snowboarding won't be as fun anymore etc. None of them know WHY they're freaking out so much,, it's irrational, but they can't help it. Above anything else, Sonic cares about his friends. If him leaving makes them so upset, then why WOULD he leave? He's happy here, after all :)

-🍑

i was thinking that instead of the typical "the more exposed to this thing you are, the more resistant you get to it", the warp topaz would work in the opposite way. so, "the more exposure you get, the weaker you become". i recall starline saying something about giving surge and kit a weakness to the hypnosis, and while that could mean he literally programmed one in via the cyborg fuckery he did to their bodies, it could also mean... this. so!

that being said, i definitely think there was like, a hill (or mountain, heh) or difficulty irt the whole thing for starline. like, just getting sonic to SIT STILL was hard enough. he literally had to bolt his feet to the floor. sonic's anger alone probably would have protected him from whatever starline was trying to tell him, at least for awhile.

but as time wore on and sonic had to weather hundreds and hundreds of exposures to the hypnosis, it would've gotten harder and harder to completely dismiss it. even when starline left to go do whatever the fuck it is he does, sonic would've been left there with nothing but those words he'd heard repeated over and over and over and over.

and that's the real trick. even before putting him in snowpoint, starline had him completely isolated. and he could think to himself, "none of what he's saying is true," but at the end of the day, it's starline's word against... no one's. cuz sonic is on his own this time.

more sessions. starline's lies repeat endlessly in his brain. he can see that damn topaz even when he closes his eyes.

it's not true. none of it. but...

he does love his friends.

and starline KNEW when he crested over the top of that mountain and the uphill battle finally ended for him, because it was when sonic haltingly repeated what he was telling him for the first time, albeit a little bit off. "i'm hhhappy in snowpoint. i d-don't wanna leave my friends."

so, how long did it take to get to that point? days? weeks? no. 2 months. of constant exposure and drilling and pressure. and sonic STILL refused to crack in exactly the way starline wanted him to. such is the will of the hero...

but yeah, i might extend the timeline a little. 4 months instead of 3, so half could've been with starline, and the other half "happy" in the town. :P

[olderthannetfic]

re: https://www.tumblr.com/olderthannetfic/767958522391609344/httpswwwtumblrcomolderthannetfic767084379956?source=share

Oof, I feel you so much anon. I got heavily bullied in elementary school, and even though I might have "toughed it out" back then, I feel like at this stage of where I am in my life (I'm gonna be 30 this year), I just end up easily falling apart even at the slightest bully-adjacent behaviour. I don't like that about myself but I also don't know how to 'get better' about it (and I am in therapy for it, but that's a whole other can of worms tbh). I feel as if my brain/body just decided to stop any logical sense of self-protection and decided to completely self-combust itself, every time.

I feel really ridiculous about it sometimes, because I wanna be more active in fandom stuff and be a participant, but I also feel like I can't (which I fully realize it's me stopping myself, no one else) and I wish I knew how to get over it (exposure therapy? I guess.). On particular bad mental health days, I fall into these ruminative persecution-loops where I'm terrified of getting "cancelled" or harassed by antis (even though I know how much full of shit they are), so that's why I mostly lurk and on occasion silently reblog once in a blue moon. It sucks.

I remember being bullied and how much it sucked, and internet was my escape (especially fandom), and now, seeing how all these anti/proship things have been playing out over a decade..it just feels like I'm "better off alone". The targeted harassment, the exclusion, etc brings way too many memories and it feels like it's not worth it in the end. :(

I don't know, I realize I sound very jaded and I wish I wasn't sometimes.

--

[majorasnightmare]

honestly fuck it dirge transgender post

Good Luck, Babe!

content warning for brief mentions of coerced sex acts

loosely covers misogyny and patriarchal standards in the cult of bhaal and its effects on orin, minthara and her relationship with menzoberranzans gender culture, with regards to how both of those affect how my personal dark urge, dirge, conceptualizes his own gender identity

dirge being bigender SPECIFICALLY isnt something that really comes UP all that much during the plot of bg3 and the interactions he has during that plot, but its not because it isnt a major defining of his self concept, but the opposite

its SO overwhelming crucial and foundational that he CANT meaningfully sit down with those feelings until after everything is so thoroughly handled and No Longer A Problem that he cant actually ignore it for "more important" issues, which means that he doesnt think about it or discuss it at all to anyone at anypoint during his travels because Thats Where The Dysphoria Demons Live and who has time for that. we have brain worms to deal with

dirges primary exposure to Gender as a concept is through the cult of bhaal, and its an underlying foundational understanding of his self perception that carries well past his tadpoling into current circumstances. the cult of bhaal itself has a twofold gendered culture (imo, headcanons incoming) and dirge internalizes both aspects

firstly theres The Cult as a religious institution that seeks to evangelize and indoctrinate new members and enact its broader political goals upon society. this Cult is fairly eglatarian, with no meaningful distinction between assassins who are men and assassins who are not. bhaal is venerated as the principal deity but worship is conducted primarily through acts of violence, which themselves are not gendered and instead rewarded based on meritocracy. all thats explictly valued is your ability to kill, which is a matter of skill and training (and sometimes race as doppelgangers are preferred assassins because of their shapeshifting)

then theres The Cult as abusive familial institution. this Cult is deeply patriarchal and misogynist, foregoing blatant sexism in favor of gendered favoritism and role enforcement. whats valued is closeness to the Image of Bhaal, the concept of what Bhaal is and who he is and how he presents, with perceived distance from this image of Bhaal being punished and discouraged. Sarevok is the main enforcer here, with Scleritas and Bhaal mostly working as support, never explicitly contradicting Sarevok even if they dont profess the same set of values. Orins self esteem issues arise primarily from the cheated feeling she has by being set up for a prized leadership role only to feel it snatched away by her bloodkin. Sarevok reveals that was never the plan at all and Orin was meant to be a sacrifical lamb for his own attempt at currying favor

Implicitly, femininity is derided here. Orin was never meant to succeed, both her and her mother as living tokens to be exchanged by their father for Bhaals favor. the dark urge is hailed as bhaals scion and closest of his kin, which sarevok and sceleritas also both remarking that part of the Urge's duties is the siring of spawn. Bhaal notably sired scores of progeny, and the Urge is expected to carry on that tradition, being referred to as a stallion which itself is a masculine term. Orin is set up to fail by being a woman, thus distancing her from the male Bhaal, and then her attempts at bridging the gap are insufficient because they involve too much of her personality (her art and unique interpretations of doctrine) which itself is derided in demeaning feminine terms (iirc "corpse dollies" is thrown around) and on top of it all, Orin can only carry one pregnancy at a time, making her a poorer vessel of bhaal in every measure sarevok cares about, even though she EXCELS at all the aspects the laymans cult values.

dirge internalizes ALL of this and expresses that particular brand of dysphoria im sure a lot of us trans folk are familiar with: "i dont think theres anything wrong with it but the idea of it for ME feels HORRIBLE". if dirge values orins shapeshifting skills, its because of how useful they are for the purpose hes born into. if dirge feels uncomfortable with his appearance and physical traits, its either because he yearns to return to Bhaals Perfect Form or because hes internalized some new thoughtcrime from Trying To Be A Person and thus must be punished for it. being a woman is fine, objectively, because women enter the cult all the time, but HE cant be a woman because that would be an unforgivable sin. He has to sire scores of spawn (nevermind if the idea of it makes him feel sick), he has to embody the will of Bhaal upon this earth, he has to ensure he never strays too far from his innate nature as a fragment of his Father! So he simply cant be a woman, because itd be bad for him specifically, and he definitely doesnt desire to be a woman or feel desire over his sisters innate skillset that allows her to shift and change as she chooses, in turn having access to more individuality than he will EVER be allowed to have even though he has a set face and she has an everchanging mask, and there isnt really anything WORTH desiring about being a woman anyways because itd all just make his life harder and he already struggles so much living up to the destiny he was born to achieve, so why would he ever make it harder? and it takes getting stabbed in the head to even PARTLY remove some of that entire mess

so post tadpoling, hes left with mostly all the negative aspects of growing up in the cult of bhaal but without any of the thought processes that justify them, so hes left feeling vaaaguely uncomfortable? with no clear reason but a Hot Brain Stove he flinches away from touching, and thats probably normal for someone in his situation so there isnt really any reason to dwell on it! it rears its head any time he tries to have sex though, and as its something he partakes in fairly often he does have to try to deal with THAT head on the misogyny hydra, the head in question being that he is deeply deeply uncomfortable trying to top in bed. His role as bhaals scion and urging from sarevok and sceleritas coerced him into sex acts with consenting cultists he REALLY did not want to participate in, for a purpose he VERY much did not want to fulfill, and thus topping is, for dirge, intrinsically tied to the idea of Trying To Impregnante Someone which itself is tied to his loss of autonomy. those reasons arent immediately known the first time he tries to be intimate, just a very strong discomfort that immediately makes itself known and which continues to do so with every intimate act he tries to participate in.

it isnt that dirge dislikes Being A Man, its more that masculinity is so wound around Being The Dark Urge that its less about masculinity and more about autonomy. he cant be a woman until hes allowed to Be Himself and THAT cant be handled until he manages to extricate himself from the cycle of abuse hes caught in with the temple. post temple confrontation, aside from the exacerbated mental illness symptoms he experiences, his own Concept of Self DOES manage to begin recovering, grief stricken as it is, and his masculine presentation doesnt change insofar as his behavior surrounding it does, loosening up on exploring his own particular preferences and being more experimental in the bedroom. masculinity itself is a kind of neutral safe ground dirge tenously pushes towards gender non conformance, and in that regard his relationship with minthara is VERY beneficial

minthara also has an incredibly Gendered upbringing but minthara carries most of her backgrounds positive and empowering aspects into her presentation as a woman. for minthara, femininity isnt just something ascribed to her but something she actively chooses to engage in and with because she enjoys doing so and finds its compelling and satisfying. this is vastly different from dirges understanding of femininity, which is something thats either not worth discussing because of how little it affects you or something that actively demeans and lessens you. thatd hed be drawn and attracted to that kind of powerful intentional presentation isnt really surprising

minthara isnt just an example for dirge of how the limits imposed on femininity are socially constructed rather than innate, she specifically is a vision of femininity he wants to partake in. most of the personality traits they find agreeable and desirable in each other are specifically considered feminine in menzoberranzan. that hes bloodthirsty, ruthless, ambitious and pragmatic are not just neutral traits but explicitly feminine gendered ones within the culture minthara openly admires and yearns for. minthara deliberately encourages the parts of him she both considers to be his strong points and also associates with women. similarly minthara is a kind of woman the family of Bhaal has no place for (and is part of why he rejects Bhaal at the end of it all) and one that Dirge hasnt gotten to experience, and its a kind of womanhood dirge badly wants for himself, the kind of woman he can actually see himself being similar to without being demeaned or lessened for it. its a gendered experience he actively craves rather than passively enjoys, and he cant actually reach for it until hes comfortable with the idea of Deliberately Having An Identity in the first place, which he then works backwards from to Purposefully Present As A Man afterwards

like many dysphoric people dirge doesnt actually engage with gender until he can do so fully and safely, and he starts with what FEELS the most transgressive and empowering, and from that position of strength works backwards to recontextualize his experience with masculinity as something equally purposeful and empowering, and its something he can only do without the threat of the absolute constraining his actions, and while comfortably within a relationship with minthara specifically, and also with the context of being forced by circumstance to really truly examine who orin was to him and what she meant to him and why. that it also involves partaking of the power proferred by his patron, which for dirge has always been a symbol of his independence and autonomy, is really just the cherry on top. its like a threefold benefit, where trying to discover your own self identity necessarily entails unpacking and dismantling the misogynistic standards you were raised into that make up the primary mental block your struggling with, and the process of doing so makes your sex life more comfortable, strengthens your relationship with the woman you consider your soul mate, and makes Identifying As A Person something you ACTIVELY enjoy rather than passively engage in out of necessity.

this is a really long stream of consciousness ramble that im not entirely certain how to end but yeah 👍 Dirge Transgender Real

[archon-maenad]

yknow I wrote out this whole post explaining why I don't often consume original media of what I post about and how worm isn't an outlier there, in a lot of unnecessary detail, and then realized I was just dancing around the point.

I am literally just not fucking emotionally strong enough to read worm. I am a lil bitch who cannot imagine actually having to follow in detail step-by-step the tragedy of taylor hebert.

but the problem is that I really want to read worm! because being on wormblr instead of just reading fanfic has like. shown me how deficient I am with the actual characters. I can write for hours about earth bet cultural trauma but when it comes to people I'd have so little if I wasn't consuming snippets and learning about smaller canonical moments via posts.

and I want to change that. I want to write actual literary analysis on worm as a story, not just worm as a world. but all my posts of the former can't match up to mine of the latter because I haven't read the source material!

so like. I should read worm on principle. I want to read worm. and I literally don't think I am emotionally sturdy enough to force myself to do it.

maybe I can start by just reading every chapter bonesaw is in or referenced. that way I can learn and write more about my favorite girl in a way that doubles as exposure therapy to the story.

(the fact this sounds viable says so much about all the ways my brain is broken lol)

[leathfaic]

Ghost and Soap tattoo headcanons because the brain worms demand it right now!

In my mind at least Ghost has a lot more tattoos than just his sleeve, it's just not common knowledge because until he gets together with Soap no one ever really sees him undressed except maybe for medical staff.

The sleeve was the beginning but he's adding to them whenever leave allows, on his chest and back, on his legs and his other arms and even his hands. Ghost is also the kind of guy that is very stoic while getting tattoos, the pain doesn't really bother him, he's been through so much worse, but he's not the guy who's chatting with the artist either. He just sits through it. Similarly afterwards he's pretty disciplined about the aftercare required. Sun rarely is an issue with the way he dresses and he plans his leave times around the appointments so he can take it easy for a while.

When the inevitable itching starts he just glares at the spot, never actually touching it, but he gets fucking irritated for a few days.

And while he's not the best at taking care of himself in many aspects of his life I can actually see him take good care of his tattoos in the long run, because I imagine him getting them to cover up scars, especially those left by Roba and his men. It's his way of reclaiming his body. The motive itself often isn't as important as the fact that he chose to have it put at that spot. The meaning isn't in the design either it's in the fact that it was his decision to wear it, unlike the scars that were forced upon him.

And then there's Soap, he's only got the one tattoo that we know, at least when he meets Ghost.

Its faded from sunlight exposure and because he never took proper care of it while it healed, even caught himself scratching it once or twice when the itching started. Its always exposed and he rarely thinks of putting sunscreen on, so naturally the tattoo has a hard time and the colour fades quick.

So at some point Ghost asks him if he wants it touched up. He's making an appointment with the artist he trusts anyways and he'd be happy to bring him along. Ghost knows that for Soap his tattoo does have meaning, that he's fucking proud to have made it into the SAS and that he got kinda sad comparing the crisp lines of Ghost's tattoos to his own.

Soap ends up agreeing although he's wary since he can't see it go better than it did last time. But if anything the fact that Ghost is allowing him to come along for this is such a huge sign of trust that he just can't refuse it.

And Ghost's tattoo artist is going to have to recover for a moment because Soap is so fucking chatty compared to Ghost, the pain is kinda exciting to him so he talks more and more and the artist hears more words out of Ghost in response to Johnny than he ever did before. Would wonder if it was the same man if they weren't literally continuing work on a tattoo they had started.

Once they are both done Ghost makes sure Soap takes proper care of the new ink. Threatens to tie him to the bed if he starts scratching at night (something Soap finds entirely too exciting). Shares his care products with him and makes him wrap it up for the first weeks and months. Is always at hand with some sun screen, at least for the arm, even when they are in the middle of nowhere. It's worth the trouble to squeeze some sun screen in his pack when he gets to see Johnny so happy about how good his tattoo looks again.

And once he sees how a properly taken care of piece will look Soap wants more. Ends up accompanying Ghost to the studio whenever he goes.

He's creative, most of what ends up on him is based on his own sketches, always with meaning behind it for him. The next thing he gets is a certain skull based on a specific mask that he wears close to his heart (making Ghost go through emotions he wasn't aware he was capable of having). He also helps Ghost with giving some of his ideas form often redrawing endless variations to make sure Simon doesn't just pick one that seems okay and fitting for its purpose but one he really likes to look at too. Poor man almost loses it when he sees one of his sketches inked on Ghost for the first time and its a good thing they are on leave because he's not gonna let him out of their bed any time soon. Purely to protect the new ink from the sun of course.

[tealfling]

You and @faerunsbest blogging back forth about rolan's knot has broke me *in the best way possible* like i thought my rolan brainworms were bad before, now i have like super rolan brainworms. I can't stop thinking about it. What have you guys done to me 😅🙇🏻‍♀️❤️

It won't let me keep the gif i picked in Anonymous, but i need you to know it was Nick from New Girl with the caption "i'm feeling really warm in my uterus"

Heheehee 😈 Yisss, anon!! We love to service the Rolan Empire filling us with Rolan- brain worms [our aftercare is pretty good too ;) ]

I feel like some of my best... whatever it is I do happens in a back & forth with @faerunsbest

We'll come up with the hottest HCs in a random comment section xD

Also, I was not on the knotting bandwagon before my bestie @faerunsbest brought me over to the dark side. Mostly through exposure therapy.

Also: I'm working on a longer fic with my tiefling Sorc Coren, but I've been throwing around the idea to write another spicy one shot. Either their first knotting or maybe their first heat/rut. I did pass 100 followers recently. Maybe we deserve a little treat?

Thoughts @faerunsbest ?

[titanbabyeams]

okay but how insane would I be if I admitted I was curious about the ship dynamic between The Ghoul & Norm?

The only issue I foresee is that, in my head, Norm is the younger brother and cannot possibly be over 22 years old… but boy, does that little worm in my brain bring up the ship every time I write.

Sometimes I just think it’d be so interesting? Norm has gained some backbone by the end of the series and I really think he wouldn’t be afraid to just… say what he thinks to The Ghoul’s face. He’d also have none of that ‘Vault Dweller Goodness’ that The Ghoul has associated with Lucy. There’d be a strange combination of respect and animosity… plus, I think he’d appreciated Norm’s dry humor.

Imagine: Lucy & The Ghoul are traveling together and Norm joins them at some point. Norm is keeping records of all the Wasteland creatures he comes across because he’s genuinely interested in how the surface has affected things and people…

…which leads him to asking rather probing questions to The Ghoul. Does he have genitalia? How long did the process take to become a ghoul? Are they experiencing radiation exposure just by traveling with him or do they have to be in closer proximity? Is he semen irradiated?

Purely scientific, of course, but The Ghoul would turn it right back on him and ask if he wants to experiment to learn these things.

Norm is disturbed, initially, cue crisis…

Who knows who knows.

[so-i-did-this-thing]

I read ACGAS (sort of) when I was about ...10 or 11, I think, and while I had a massive AmE vocabulary, I lacked enough (any) exposure to British English, culture, and geography to get it. Some parts were great, but I didn't understand a lot of it, and after starting and quitting the second book in the series, chalked it up as one of those things that is Not For Me. But I will always remember - probably the only thing I remember - a farmer saying "'E's womitin', sor, womitin' bad." This is my sole takeaway, and I'm fond of it, despite the fact that it plays on repeat in my head every time I'm ill. I just felt the need to share that with someone, after 35-odd years.

You're not alone! The dialect was also a challenge for me as an American child (and Southern, to boot).

The "womiting" line has absolutely wormed itself into my brain all my life, as well! God, lol. I was actually a bit upset when the revival series tweaked the accents a bit and the "w" converted to a "v". 🤣

[quantum-mechan1c]

Worm OCs Introduction and Masterpost

so because I have worms in my brain (ha) i keep coming up with new powersets and associated characters, mostly based off of myself and / or people in my life. Thus this is the Wormsona collection. New characters will be added as they spawn from my brain & i find time to do their writeups. If you know me in real life have fun trying to guess who's who lmao

Also some of these are collaborations with @rhinestonebabe, which will be noted whenever they're used. probably not a big deal but worth mentioning.

If you want to post or draw these guys go nuts, just tag and credit me and / or @rhinestonebabe. (not that i think this is likely but it'd be cool if it did happen)

All power ratings are speculative and fairly baseless. if any wormheads out there wanna argue about what the ratings should be, go nuts.

Playboy

Description

she / her, mid 20's. Brunette with short hair. Technically a trans woman, though mostly only her teammates ( on some protectorate team, probably. maybe vegas?) know that. Due to prolonged exposure to Apex's field, the ordinarily temporary transformation stuck, and her body is now permanently female. This is also where the ears and tail that most people assume are part of her costume come from, as well as her somewhat cartoonish proportions. Her costume is literally just the Playboy bunny girl outfit. If she works out of Vegas, this might literally be a sponsorship deal.

Powers

Mover 5 / Thinker 4. Enhanced strength and durability in her arms and legs grants rabbit-like bursts of speed and general mobility. Could jump onto the roof of a typical suburban home from a standstill and keep pace with a slow-ish car, maybe 30-35 mph. Superhuman for sure, but sustained speed isn't really her thing. In quick bursts from point to point, she can move faster than the eye can track.

The thinker rating comes from her danger sense. Her shard constantly monitors incoming attacks, and hijacks her nervous system to force her to move out of the way. The shard is precognitive by up to 3 seconds, but tends not to move her out of the way until the last possible moment

Unfortunately for her, the shard is very jumpy (pun intended), and tends to interpret a lot of banal physical contact as an attack, including but not limited to high-fives, penetrative sex, and hugs. She has been known to (unintentionally) escape emotionally charged conversations by jumping straight vertically indoors and getting stuck in the ceiling. Physically incapable of meeting Oblivion's eyes. These reflexes can be suppressed through great effort, albeit inconsistently.

Her danger sense is why she can get away with the bunny suit -- she doesn't need armor when it's almost impossible to land a hit on her in a straight fight, unless the opponent has webs or an aoe or something else that can counter super high mobility and auto-dodge. This makes her extremely annoying to fight, which she takes great pleasure in.

Typically she plays a recon role, and tries not to get in too many one on one fights, since if she does get hit in her core shes basically just a girl in a Halloween costume. When she does fight, it tends to be hit-and-run while a teammate provides cover. Her drop-kicks can deliver an incredible amount of energy, since her legs and feet are damn near invulnerable, but it's hard for her to keep up a sustained assault.

[frogwithastrawberry]

Danny Phantom headcanons I just thought of!

For starters: Not really a headcanon, but I love it when people write Danny using astronomy related nicknames for his partners. It makes the brain worms happy

-All ghosts have a specific weakness tied to when they died. It is HIGHLY frowned upon to knowingly use this against someone. Like, they can recover from it, but not easily

-this weakness is especially prominent in Halfas

-Out of the three Halfas, Danny is the only one who really has the weakness. Since the weakness is based on Death, he's the only one it really applies to?

-Vlad died slowly over time due to one event of mass exposure to ectoplasm, which I'm saying seeped into an open sore like acne in his face, and then replicated said acne. While the original case healed, the ectoplasm was in his bloodstream, and since he was fully alive it was slowly over time taking over his bloodcells, until eventually one day he, just found himself with enough of it that he was able to use ghost powers, and then the ectoplasm recognized him as a ghost and stopped harming him

-Dani was never really fully alive. She has a slight weakness to electricity as residue from Danny, but it's barely more than how one would normally react to being shocked

-For Danny though, the electric shock from the portal killed him, and the Lichtenberg scars that were formed as a result counted as enough of an open wound the ectoplasm started seeping in. Since the ectoplasm crept into the scar of what killed him though, he has a weakness to electricity

-this does also mean that if someone were to die by a fire, the ectoplasm would go into burn scars. They die by bleeding out though? Well, being stabbed was going to be a weakness anyways. Someone dies by drowning, the ectoplasm takes over the lungs, since they went out of commission, etc.

-TLDR: Ectoplasm works by taking over blood cells. Souls don't have those, so they just become fully ectoplasmic beings, AKA ghosts. Live people have blood cells, and the ectoplasm seeps into whatever open scars may exist until it occupies 50-75% of the bloodstream, making you recognizable as a ghost, and a halfa.

-BONUS FOR IF YOU WANT DC IN HERE!

-the reason Jason has pit madness is because the pit is ectoplasm (as most have agreed on) and since he was a corpse, the ectoplasm wasn't sure where to go. He didn't have any pumping blood for it to take it over, and so it settled in as his nervous system. But then the ACTUAL nervous system and blood vessels started working, and they're doing they're best to push out the mysterious entity, but the ectoplasm is sentient, and therefore trying to stay. (It's losing)

-this does mean that in my headcanon Jason can either become the fourth halfa, or become fully human again, depending on if the ectoplasm keeps fighting, or if he meets Danny who teaches him to control it

-side note: If he were to become fully human again he'd likely have a shorter lifespan since his body would be used to having assistance against things like injuries or poisons and wouldn't be able to learn how to heal fully by itself again fast enough to save him.

[fisheadz]

I wanted to expand more on my SWTD + ISM crossover. I’m just… so ill for it. I swear to the hallucinogenic pasta noodles that I’ll be getting back to requests and stuff soon, I’m just still working on my fic and my life and now this shit.

Spoilers for both Still Wakes The Deep and In Sound Mind, of course. Tread with caution, and a tolerance for the long rants of a man taken by the brain worms™️.

What if Caz ends up in the CU at some point? Desmond would have to go back in to keep him from going nuts. If he hasn’t already, that is.

A headcanon of mine is that, once a person has succumbed to their Shadow, they’re left as a sort of husk, a shell of themselves. They function, yeah, but they certainly aren’t themselves. They move around, they do miscellaneous tasks and they even work, but they don’t speak, at least not normally. Like, if they’re asked something common, like if they’re alright or something, they’ll answer with whatever they usually say to that question. If they’re asked anything more complex, they’ll just repeat a generic, common response, or not answer at all. Think, the Shadows talking to themselves and Desmond, but not really saying anything complex outside of their feelings and their goals (mostly just to kill Desmond).

Something like that happens to Caz, after he gets exposed to AR like Desmond or Lucas had (I’m thinking Lucas, because whatever strain of the stuff they dosed Desmond with just sent him into a funky coma) in some way. They get a call from Suze (with Billy flipping out in the background) and she says that Caz has suddenly stopped making sense, and he’s just been doing the dishes, or sweeping the floor, or whatever, for an unreasonable amount of time now, and they’re worried about him. So they go to their place to try and get through to Caz.

I think Lucas was in the CU during his own exposure to it way back when, in a sort of "pocket space" similar to the patients homes, or Desmond’s office, or even the In Between Tapes. But he wasn’t there for long, either due to the dosage of the chemical, the strain, or some other factor. Therefore, he has some experience with it, but not as much as Desmond. I imagine there would be a brief fight about it, because Desmond’s terrified of going back, but is their best bet to help Caz, and Lucas knows Desmond’s scared but would have no idea what he’s doing. But they can’t both go in. Rosemary is busy, and the others are off the table.

Eventually, Suze gets fed the fuck up with how long this is taking, and puts her foot down. Either they make up their minds and take her with, or she goes in alone. Billy is… not happy about this, but he’s also getting impatient. This is their partner on the line, and they aren’t keen on wasting time when he could be in danger in there.

And so, Desmond and Suze (against his and Lucas’ wishes, but they can’t exactly stop her once she’s made up her mind) go into the Collective, and right off the bat, Desmond can tell something’s off (more so than usual).

Either due to the Shapes presence in the form of Caz (and maybe Billy and Suze, depending on if they’re Infected by now) or something else, things are definitely different. The Building is wrecked (again, more so than usual), and the town outside, while not as flooded as when he left, is practically destroyed, in a way that the tainted water couldn’t achieve.

So now, Desmond is trying to convince Suze to leave, because now things are even more uncertain, and she’s getting pissed off because of, well, everything. Lucas is on the phone with Rosemary, feeding them as much information and tips as he can through the radio, and suddenly he informs them that something’s changed with Caz.

Now they have a time limit, so there’s no time to fight about Suze being there. There search for Caz’s door, and find it somewhere on the first floor with the other’s doors. (I imagine it’s be a dark blue or smt, or maybe the same funky pink color the Shape was had.) They go in, and it’s their old home. The bedroom is kept shut by a sort of veil or small sheet or smt made of oil. I’m sure you can see where this is going.

They get Caz’s tape (he’s nowhere in the Building, so it’s their only option) and play it. Once they do, and once they listen to his session bits with Desmond, they find themselves - oh oh, guess where! - on the rig.

Of course, it’s not as wrecked as it was when Caz last saw it, more like it was soon after the first explosion, after Caz woke up. And they can hear him, his howling echoing through the rig. They can’t see him yet, but he sounds big. They find some more of those oil veils, though they don’t have anything to remove them just yet.

There’s the obligatory call from Rainbow to mess with Desmond, because I said so, but there’s also other calls. It’s similar to the session fragments in Lucas’ tape, though instead of how they were presented there, in Caz’s tape they’re the phone calls he had while on the rig, although not all of them are like that. Some of them are more like internal or external dialogue, like when he first encountered each infected, or when he talked to other survivors, like his conversation with Finlay before Gibbos section. If this were from a gameplay standpoint, they’d only find these calls or voicemails or whatevers by picking up a phone with something different about it. Depending on where the phone is, it will play a specific line. From a fic standpoint, they just hear the phones ringing once they get close. At first they ignore them, because they think it’s Rainbow and they don’t have time for that right now, but after answering a call from him while they’re safe, they go back and listen to them to try and piece together enough to defeat Caz’s Shadow.

Speaking of his Shadow, I’d like to think that it sorta takes the form of @milestonekestrel ‘s (sorry bout the @) Infected Lizard Caz. Big ol’ lizard chasing Desmond and Suze through the rig as it slowly but surely falls apart beneath them. It wouldn’t be all fleshy squishy though, it will be leaking oil (though I can’t decide if it want it to be AR oil stuff or more like the tainted water stuff, or a combo of Shape stuff and AR stuff) and parts of it will be practically made of it. It would be a bit bigger than the Bull, so that it can move through the rig, and get blocked off in reasonable spots, and just generally be terrifying while chasing Desmond and Suze. It would talk a lot like the Infected did, with some Shadow-typical stuff thrown in. They can’t really hurt it without the item, though they can briefly stun it by shooting its stomach when it lunges.

And, because of course, one of the things you need is Caz’s screwdriver, like in Max’s tape. I’m weak, okay?

The item/weapon for Caz’s tape is, you guessed it! His lighter. It would be in his room (Desmond and Suze would’ve entered the tape in the helipad) and with it, they can burn Caz’s Shadow by lighting its oily spots on fire. While it’s distracted trying to extinguish the flames, they run to a safe area. Wash rinse repeat until they reach the derrick.

The boss fight happens there, of course, and I suck ass at action so no specifics, but they defeat his Shadow (the Infected? Maybe just call it the Shape to be lazy? What about the Flesh? That’s fun) and, after the heart-to-heart with it, it fades away, and they return to the Building and het back in contact with Lucas, who confirms that Caz is back to himself and really wants his wife back. So they return, and that’s that!

I think that, like some of the other tapes, there would be echos of sorts of the other crew members, and while I’m on the fence about there being Inkblots, considering that Rainbow clearly had the ability to spawn them, though it’s unclear if he spawns all of them, and I’d like Rainbow to be a more neutral force here, I want there to be some sort of damage-causing force where the Infected were on the rig. Like how the echos in Lucas’ tape damage you sometimes, but on a bigger scale, requiring Desmond and Suze to sneak around the area to avoid getting hurt. Smt like that. Sorta like the mannequins in terms of lore and interactions but, evil, y’know?

Meanwhile, outside of the Collective Unconscious, Billy and Lucas are just chatting away. I have no idea how well they’d get along, but I think Billy would certainly appreciate the distraction. He’s used to weird shit by now, with where I put this in the crossover not-quite-story, but that doesn’t mean he knows much about what’s happening, so hearing about it from Lucas himself is comforting.

When Suze and Desmond finally get out of the CU, she, Caz, and Billy have a long heart-to-heart, and after a while of being ignored, Desmond and Lucas decide to check up on them later, and leave to have their own little post-angst comfort talk.

I have zero fricking idea how this turned into an almost-fic, but I’m not about to change it. I have so many ideas about Caz’s tape and his Shadow, and how many metaphors I can reasonably shove into it, but I do not wanna write it all out rn.

What his Rorschach test transcript said, and what song his vinyl is, is up for interpretation. I imagine that the last letter Suze sent him is near his lighter, and the one Suze reads at the end of SWTD is in the bedroom behind the oil veil. Ugh I have so many ideas bro :’^.