#things that won't make sense without context

[how-to-train-your-pomni]

No need to apologize, I see how it could get confusing

The "AU inside of an AU" comment was mostly a joke, as the "B.ored F.renemies W.ith B.enefits" plot could be an AU on its own.

You're correct to assume that the pregnancy and such is Canon, I was just sorta joking around after noticing how they look like they could either be in the same universe or different universes on their own.

[aceofthyme]

heads up, seven up

a WIP tag game

tagged by the phenomenal @carrotsofthepirabbean !!

rules: post the last seven lines you wrote, then tag seven people

I fully thought I’d posted this already so I suppose I must have dreamt that but! Here are the last seven lines I wrote (ish—it’s technically six but there are two different lines with semicolons so…). This is set in 1885, in what could probably best be described as a continuation of the canon timeline the musical sets forth. At least, according to my brain. It's also more of me on my Jewish!Doc train. Enjoy (?):

Watching Marty fall had broken something deep inside Emmett, had permanently shattered something in his chest that was slowly tearing through him from the inside out. Occasionally, the thought would cross his mind that Marty had been through the same thing; Marty had watched him die, or presumably die, multiple times—and had desperately tried to save him. And what had he done, when put in the place of watching Marty—apparently—die? He’d fallen apart. Emmett reached into his pocket and pulled out a compass, squinting at the dial and turning it before determining that it was properly aligned. Still keeping his eyes on the compass, he wandered closer to his living quarters, eventually finding himself near his bed; he took great care to make sure he was facing east before slipping the compass back into his pocket and heaving a sigh.

I don't believe I have anyone to tag who hasn't already been tagged? but of course anyone who would like to do so please go ahead (and feel free to tag me because I'd love to see what y'all are working on!!)

[aaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaabaaaaaaa]

Have an out of context Spearmaster react

[kaurwreck]

Paradoxes Nothing in the world is as soft, as weak, as water; nothing else can wear away the hard, the strong, and remain unaltered. Soft overcomes hard, weak overcomes strong. Everybody knows it, nobody uses the knowledge. So the wise say: By bearing common defilements you become a sacrificer at the altar of earth; by bearing common evils you become a lord of the world. Right words sound wrong. [Ch. 78 of Tao Te Ching, ascribed to Lao Tzu; English version by Ursual K. Le Guin]

I'm water like how raging rivers are water, so I also find solace and praxis in Ch. 63 (excerpted from the same English version as above):

Consider Beginnings Do without doing. Act without action. Savor the flavorless. Treat the small as large, the few as many. Meet injury with the power of goodness. Study the hard while it's easy. Do big things while they're small. The hardest jobs in the world start out easy, the great affairs of the world start small. So the wise soul, by never dealing with great things, gets great things done. Now, since taking things too lightly makes them worthless, and taking things too easy makes them hard, the wise soul, by treating the easy as hard, doesn't find anything hard.

I'd recommend the entire Tao Te Ching, actually, for self cultivating mettle, but if nothing else, the above is presently, as ever, salient.

If you'd like something more literally applicable, however —

Living With Change When the government's dull and confused, the people are placid. When the government's sharp and keen, the people are discontented. Alas! misery lies under happiness, and happiness sits on misery, alas! Who knows where it will end? Nothing is certain. The normal changes into the monstrous, the fortunate into the unfortunate, and our bewilderment goes on and on. And so the wise shape without cutting, square without sawing, true without forcing. They are the light that does not shine.

(In other words, according to Ursula K. Le Guin's footnote to the above Ch. 58, Taoists gain their ends without the use of means.)

I won't promise it'll be okay, regardless of what happens over the next few days, but I can promise the outcome is navigable.

[aqueerkettleofish]

Free Advice for Game Developers

Don't make it so I have to guess whether the issue is "the game does not allow this" or "It's perfectly doable, I'm just not doing it right/standing in the right place/holding my mouth right."

If it's an obstacle that my middle-aged-mouse-potato ass could climb over, then my twenty-something-action-hero character should be able to climb over it. It is literally less immersion-breaking to just be stopped and have an onscreen message saying "You cannot go this way" than it is to encounter a perfectly surmountable object that is nonetheless inexplicably insurmountable.

If I can regularly interact with a specific kind of object (example: door or container), then don't put that type of object in the game where I can't interact with it at all, especially when context suggests that it would be useful. The container can be empty. The door can be impossible to unlock. (Alternately, have a separate model for "door that cannot be unlocked"-- I'm thinking of the original Bloodlines, which used doors without knobs.)

If a specific kind of object is normally entirely cosmetic and can't be interacted with, and in order to progress you have to interact with that kind of object, then there needs to be some kind of hint.

When I finally break down and look up the solution to your puzzle online, my response should be "Dammit, I could have figured that out" not "I would never have tried that in a million years."

When the answer is "This object can only be interacted with while facing it from the southwest at 8:37AM game time, with six rocks and a stuffed poodle in your inventory, after you've put the green cup in the red trunk in the blue castle on the other side of the map", that better be an easter egg rather than gameplay.

I understand why your fast travel system won't let me go to a place that I haven't been already, especially in an open-world game. That makes sense...unless your fast travel system is integrated into the game world, and the limitation doesn't make sense for, say, a public transit system or a taxicab.

When you have one button that does multiple things, please make sure that the game doesn't hijack the button click. The most common (and enraging) example of this is when I go to interact with an object, and I press the "interact" button, but just as I'm doing so, dialog pops up, and my "interact" has not only cut off the other person speaking, so I missed it completely, but has chosen a reply from the list that I did not get a chance to actually choose.

[lttleghost]

I've complained about this meme before but I feel like I can more precisely describe why it pisses me off now, cause like yeah yeah it's silly it doesn't matter all that much but like... the joke of it is basically just "haha Jesse stupid and messes stuff up Walt knows about" without actually... thinking about Walt or Jesse's characters and what they're actually knowledgeable about nor about the actual contexts of all trainwrecks that these two get into and how almost every single time it's WALT who had the more reasonable option to avoid it

like okay so we see Jesse play video games, we see even more game cases scattered around his house and apartment, my girl is a gamer, and there is no such evidence with Walt. if one of these characters knows a ton about minecraft and the other doesn't, the knowledgeable one is gonna be Jesse - but Walt hates not being in control, he likes to boss around others and he thinks he knows better than others, and especially thinks he knows better than Jesse, and Jesse has shit self esteem and is easily manipulated and caves to what Walt wants him to do most of the time after awhile. realistically this situation would go something along the lines of Jesse trying to tell Walt how to make a cobblestone generator, Walt saying that it makes no sense for some reason or another and telling Jesse to do it a different way, and then acting like it's Jesse's fault that it didn't work when Jesse goes and does it like Walt told him to, kinda like how Jesse tells Walt that doing certain things and getting involved with certain people as drug dealers isn't a good idea and Walt tells him to do something anyway and it goes badly for both of them

or even if we wanted to assume that Walt IS the one with the minecraft knowledge, any time past literally episode one Jesse tends to ask questions when he doesn't fully understand something, and Walt often just dismisses the question, Jesse still tries to do whatever he's supposed to with his limited knowledge but fails, in such examples as "why won't fluoric acid melt this flimsy plastic" so a different route for a more accurate meme is that Walt tells Jesse how to make the cobblestone generator, something about the process doesn't make sense to Jesse, he asks a clarifying question, Walt's answer is basically "fuck you", Jesse still tries his goddamn best even if he fails and Walt blames it on Jesse over considering the idea that refusing to answer Jesse's clarifying question was the actual problem

[awearywritersworld]

my very soul demands you

sukuna x reader summary: you introduce sukuna to cuddling and romance novels. meanwhile, he's still struggling to make sense of his feelings for you, despite wanting to commit murder because another man had the nerve to touch your arm (which earns him a lecture from yuuji). w/c: 2.5k tags/warnings: enemies to lovers. angst to fluff. jealous!sukuna. aged up!yuuji. features yuuji x reader. cursing. banter. hopefully not too ooc for sukuna. not canon compliant. fem!reader. no use of y/n. no manga spoilers. a/n: this could maybe be read as a stand alone, but it'd flow much better with the context of the previous two parts. lots of denial and begrudging softness from sukuna here. definitely more fluff than anything tho. this series has been fun to write, so thanks for reading<3 i appreciate reblogs or feedback! let me know if you'd like to be tagged in any additional parts. series masterlist // masterlist

when you crawl in between sukuna's legs and curl up against his chest, it's a foreign experience that makes his body stiffen.

he'd been with countless women during his lifetime, but while fucking is one thing, he never once found himself in a position that struck him as this... intimate.

"hold me," you whine as if you can sense his unfamiliarity with such matters.

he rolls his eyes, beginning to wonder if your habit of throwing orders at him is actually some sort of compulsive need. "didn't anyone ever teach you manners?"

despite his irritation, he acquiesces to your demand and once he envelops you in his arms, some of his rigidness dissipates.

you hum contentedly. "isn't that better?"

"it's tolerable," he asserts, his chest vibrating against your cheek.

"whatever you say." tangling your legs with his, you turn your attention back to the movie you've both been watching.

he doesn't understand this... tedious display of affection, nor does he particularly enjoy it... right?

and he only allows it because he can't rid his mind of the image of your tear stained face... right?

yeah, that has to be it. he figures he can endure this, given that he was the reason you were so upset earlier.

it goes without saying that he doesn't realize it when he begins to rub absentminded circles on your back.

and the way the warmth of your body forces his usually tense muscles to relax goes unacknowledged.

when the credits begin to roll, sukuna's wearing an expression of unimpressed disinterest. "that's seriously how it ends?"

you don't respond, so he looks down only to find that you're fast asleep.

"tch. you ask to watch a movie, force me to pick it, and then you don't even have the decency to stay awake." he's not sure why he's chiding you even though he knows you can't hear him, but he keeps his voice low enough that it won't disturb you.

sukuna's spent more time than he cares to admit watching your sleeping form, but this is the first time that it's actually him you're pressed against. it's the first time he can reach out and touch you.

your hair has fallen across your face, so he pushes it back behind your ear gently. the pads of his fingers brush against your cheekbone, a ghost of a caress, and his gaze lingers on your parted lips.

he lets out a deep breath, tearing his eyes away from you. "impertinent brat."

reaching for the remote, he flips off the tv and casts the room in darkness.

upon waking up in the morning, yuuji's confused once he notices that he's on the couch and you're sleeping against his chest.

he may have been half asleep when he arrived home, but he's still positive he went to bed. stretching his arms above his head, the movement jostles you from your slumber.

"mornin', baby."

"good morning, yu," you yawn in response, shifting to sit up.

"how'd i wind up on the couch?" he asks, though he's already got an inkling of the answer.

"oh," you blush. "sukuna kind of made an appearance last night."

"that so? how'd it go?"

you think there might be a shadow of a smirk playing on his lips. is he teasing you?

"good," you offer. "we watched a movie."

"watched a movie with the king of curses," he muses before his face breaks out into a lopsided grin. "you sure are somethin', baby."

returning his smile, you lean in and press your lips to his. "hm. says you."

it's not uncommon for you to meet yuuji for lunch if his mission is short and nearby, and today is one of those days, so he eagerly makes his way to the cafe you agreed on.

he's still a few hundred feet away when he spots you through the window, chatting with a man he recognizes as your childhood friend.

his gaze drops to where his hand is wrapped around your forearm as you both share a laugh together.

it doesn't really bother yuuji, he trusts you implicitly and jealousy isn't an emotion that's really on his radar. the same can't be said for everyone, though.

sukuna watches on as well, his thoughts much darker than his vessel's. who does that wretch think he is, putting his hands on you?

you're not his to touch.

"give me control," sukuna growls, his mouth appearing on yuuji's cheek.

"and why would i do that?"

"so i can rip his heart out and gift it to her since he seems so interested in offering his affections."

"duuuude," yuuji begins, somewhat amused. "i don't think she'd be super crazy about you murdering her friend."

"fine," sukuna bites back, well aware that yuuji has a point. "but he can live without his filthy hands, can't he? perhaps i'll pull each arm from his torso—"

yuuji snorts. "you have some serious issues, man."

he can feel sukuna trying to take over and easily curbs the attempt, though that only fuels the king of curses' irritation. "my only issue lies in the fact you're allowing this to happen."

yuuji reaches the door, a bell chiming through the cafe as he pulls it open. "she's a big girl. she doesn't need either of us to dictate what can and can't happen to her."

once you see your boyfriend, your face lights up and you call out his name. you place a kiss on his cheek and snake an arm around his waist in greeting, and the space it puts between you and your friend is enough to keep sukuna from protesting further.

"you two have met, right?" you ask.

"yeah! hey, itadori! it's been a while."

"it has! good to see you, yamada."

"i'd love to stay and chat more, but i have to get going," he states, leaning in to give you a hug which you return. "we should all go out together soon!"

"absolutely not, you deplorable knave—" yuuji slaps a hand to his cheek before sukuna can continue and yamada gives him an odd look.

your eyes widen for a split second and you have to stop yourself from facepalming.

"what'd you say?" yamada asks, sounding a bit hesitant.

"i said absolutely, sounds like an enjoyable night!"

the men exchange a handshake before you and yuuji make your way to a table.

"sukuna, what the hell was that?" you hiss once yamada's out of earshot.

"i don't know what you mean," he responds smugly.

you meet yuuji's eye and he just shrugs his shoulders, but you swear the corners of his mouth twitch upward.

you can't imagine anything good coming from the two of them colluding with one another, but let it go anyway.

opening up your menu, you sigh in defeat. "if you say so."

"what do you mean you'd rather disembowel yourself?" you question the man sitting across from you.

it's becoming more commonplace to see those dark marks adorning yuuji's body during the nighttime hours. you sometimes wonder if he's letting it happen or if sukuna's just getting better at taking over, but you're too nervous to ask.

"do you need a dictionary? there's one over on the shelf—"

"no, asshole. i know what disembowel means! i just don't understand your refusal."

he raises his eyebrows at the obscenity, but doesn't comment on it. "i'm not reading some inane romance novel."

"but brontë's one of my favorite authors!"

"it makes no difference if it was penned by the gods. the thought alone is absurd. can we move on now?"

you don't respond. instead, you cross your arms and stare at the wall defiantly. your face is contorted into an expression that lets sukuna know you're clearly affronted.

"very mature, you silly little girl."

"sorry you find me and my interests so childish," you huff.

"oh, please. that's not what i said."

you continue giving him the cold shoulder, having no desire to argue further, but more than willing to die on this hill.

"fine, don't talk. it's no matter to me," he claims (despite it being the furthest thing from the truth).

as the minutes tick by, he keeps looking at you from the corner of his eye and exhaling dramatically.

eventually, he calls your name in an exasperated tone, and while it makes your heart flutter, you still don't spare him a glance. you just hold the book out for him and to your surprise, he rips it from your grasp.

"you're ridiculous," he grumbles, opening the cover to reveal the first page. "i hate you."

when he glances over to see you're beaming at him despite the insult, he adds (albeit half heartedly), "i mean it, brat."

the two of you sit in silence, each of you reading your respective books. a few chapters in, sukuna comes across the following conversation:

"do you know where the wicked go after death?" "they go to hell," was my ready and orthodox answer. "and what is hell? can you tell me that?" "a pit full of fire." "and should you like to fall into that pit, and to be burning there for ever?" "no, sir." "what must you do to avoid it?" i deliberated a moment; my answer, when it did come, was objectionable: "i must keep in good health, and not die."

to your astonishment, you actually hear him chuckle, but when he looks over and finds your self satisfied smirk, any hint of humor disappears from his face in the blink of an eye. your hand quickly moves to your mouth to stifle a giggle.

"something you want to say?" he baits you.

"nope, nothing at all!"

two nights later, he's already nearing the end of the story and you refrain from commenting about how quickly he's made his way through.

you doubt he'd allow your current position if you had— you're laying on your side, your head resting comfortably in his lap, one hand occupying the space above his knee.

when you asked if it was okay, all he offered you was a clipped, "i suppose."

your hair is splayed across his thigh and your eyes fluttered shut a while ago. when he agreed to this, he didn't realize how distracting it'd be. his gaze flickers between you and the words on the page with embarrassing frequency.

he's decided what you call cuddling is absolutely suffocating. how anyone could actually enjoy it, he's sure he'll never comprehend. he can hardly concentrate on the novel that's right in front of him—

"read to me, 'kuna," you mumble, interrupting his thoughts. it surprises him that you're still awake.

he scoffs. "what do i look like? your personal audiobook?"

"you didn't even know those existed until like a week ago," you laugh. "c'mon, pleaaaaaase."

he stays quiet for a few moments, so you're under the impression he may just ignore your request. as such, you're exceptionally pleased when his voice fills the otherwise still apartment.

you think the sound of his voice is comforting, an idea that would more than likely make him cringe, so you keep it to yourself. after all, you don't want him to stop.

at some point or another, he begins twirling a strand of your hair around his finger whenever he's not turning the page, an action that seems to take place without his noticing.

occasionally he'll pause to ask if you're even listening. it's an odd feeling that blossoms in his stomach when you assure, "mhmm. every word."

as he reaches the second to last chapter, he reads a line that makes you question whether your heart's stopped beating. you're not sure if it's because of the tone of his voice, the words he's imparting, or some mix thereof.

"no—no—jane; you must not go. no—i have touched you, heard you, felt the comfort of your presence—the sweetness of your consolation: i cannot give up these joys. i have little left in myself—I must have you. the world may laugh—may call me absurd, selfish—but it does not signify."

he stops reading, as if he too feels the sense of unease that's invaded the air. against your better judgement, you turn to look at him. his eyes are glued to the page, almost like they're avoiding you, and his jaw is tense.

"my very soul demands you: it will be satisfied, or it will take deadly vengeance on its frame.”

when his gaze finally lands on you, his expression is almost pained. it's a strange contrast to the warm fondness you spot in his eyes.

you quickly push that thought away, however. whatever you believe you may have seen, you're probably just deluding yourself. you know you aren't his least favorite person, but surely he'd never feel even half of that sentiment toward you—

your breath catches in your throat when his hand reaches up, his thumb brushing over your bottom lip. he still marvels at the fact you don't shy away from his touch, that you're usually the one to seek out contact with him.

perhaps the story is not as asinine as he expected it to be. rochester presumes jane will find him revolting, yet she still agrees to be with him, even after his selfishness has been made plain to her. after the sins of his past have caught up to him.

no, no, no.

to be so desperate for some woman's approval, or her devotion for that matter, is despicable. rochester's nothing less than foolish and sukuna isn't anything like him.

but you're certainly like jane, aren't you? fearless, passionate, and determined: all things he can't help but find endearing...

gods, what is this turmoil? it's making him feel pathetic and there isn't an emotion in the world he hates more—

you distract him from his internal monologue when your fingers wrap around his wrist and bring his knuckles to your lips. "you okay?"

"of course," he mutters, pulling his hand away. "just trying to get past all the mawkishness."

"really? you think it's that bad?" you question, the frown on your lips igniting that ache in his chest that appears whenever you're upset.

"it's not terrible," he sighs, realizing there may indeed be one thing he despises even more than feeling pathetic. "although i don't understand how jane is so taken with rochester."

you seem to ponder this for a moment before shrugging. "love is weird."

"what a clever analysis."

you slap his chest playfully. "oh, whatever. just keep going, you're almost finished!"

and you're right. he does reach the end of jane eyre that night, but not before you fall asleep on his lap. he closes the book, running a finger down the creased spine and setting it down carefully. it's obvious you've read it several times.

admittedly, he can see why, but he'd be caught dead before he'd ever tell you as much.

left alone with his thoughts, he considers the impossibility of jane and rochester: a charming, headstrong woman and a cruel, arrogant man.

leaning forward, he whispers your name to make certain you're asleep, then places a lingering kiss to your forehead.

"..sweet dreams."

[fillejondrette]

a lot of men really just seem to want to be able to victimize women without women getting upset about it. they'll say that women who take safety precautions have victim complexes, but then say the same thing about women who don't take those safety precautions. i saw this recently in the context of female travelers.

first, i saw a video of a woman demonstrating safety precautions to take on cruises, doing stuff like hooking things to her door to stop it from being opened, clipping the curtains shut, etc. personally, i don't feel the need to those things, and i feel like it's probably a diminishing returns situation- once you've done the obvious stuff like locking the door, any extra steps probably won't help you that much. but if it makes her sleep better, then there's no harm.

second, i saw a video of a woman talking about how she roadtripped in a foreign country with a couple of male travelers she met online. so the total opposite of the first woman, in the sense that she did something i think very few women would be willing to do.

the male comments on both videos were pretty similar, though. they both focused on women's so-called obsession with being victims. the first woman is paranoid, fixated on the idea of being a victim. one commenter wrote "me watching her do all this shit when i'm already hiding inside her room." the message is that women's precautions are silly and ultimately useless, if men really want to hurt us. comments on the second video contained a lot of assumptions that the second woman must have paid for her trip with sex. but many of the commenters were saying things like, "women will do things like this and cry victim, you wanted to be victimized." so they're acknowledging that being alone with random men is in fact dangerous for women. the second woman is a dumb slut who deserves what's coming to her.

i think men are, by and large, pretty aware of how men treat women. they acknowledge this with the argument that women need men to protect them (from other men). they treat male violence as a fact of nature that shouldn't reflect badly on men as a group, and shouldn't make women distrust men - except when a woman does trust men, no, that's wrong too. there's no correct way to behave that will make you a "good" victim, or a reasonable person, in their eyes, and i think that's the goal. if a woman's hurt, it's her fault. if she's afraid of getting hurt, it's her fault. the man is never the one at fault.

[icantbelieveitsnotbutler]

How Tight is Sebastian's Collar?

When Ciel "breached" the contract by briefly giving up on revenge, the contract didn't automatically end. In fact, there was no indication that a breach had even occurred until Sebastian brought it up. If the contract doesn't automatically enforce its terms, does Ciel have to be aware that Sebastian is violating a rule and explicitly accuse him in order for the terms to be enforced?

Manga spoilers.

Despite Ciel's efforts to make them watertight, none of the contract terms are as straightforward as they might seem. The first rule, to not lie to Ciel, is immediately complicated by what Sebastian says after:

Does this mean that the contract doesn't automatically filter or check everything Sebastian says and that Ciel has to do something to enforce the rule? Does Ciel have to expose the contract mark and explicitly tell him to not lie every time he asks a question? Or is it enough to ask directly?

Maybe the contract does automatically detect/prevent lies and Sebastian's comment about the contract seal means either that as long as the contract mark is on Ciel, Sebastian won't be able to lie to him, or that Ciel will be able to sense if Sebastian is lying and then use the seal to either force the truth out of him or end the contract.

In the worst-case scenario, Sebastian's offer of three wishes in the contract scene was actually a lie and the terms and everything after are all lies. Only the initial condition (Ciel's soul in exchange for the power to take vengeance on those who caused the twin's month of suffering) was real. In that case, the answer to "how tight is Sebastian's collar?" is that it doesn't matter, because the collar isnt attached to a leash.

In the best-case scenario, the contract makes it so that Ciel would be aware if Sebastian lied to him or outright prevent him from lying, which means that Sebastian has never lied to anyone during the duration of their contract, at least up until the last time he told Ciel that he doesn't tell lies. This is because if he can't lie to Ciel, when he tells Ciel that he doesn't lie, with no qualifications, everything he has said before that is retroactively verified as not a lie.

So what was the point of limiting his required truthfulness to just Ciel? I think Toboso either decided to change the rule for plot reasons that have yet to be revealed, or the rule has always been that he can't lie to just Ciel, and he somehow managed to forget the qualification by the time they left the church.

Something to note is that this rule is not to lie, which is different from simply always telling the truth. A lie is not just false information: it must be deliberately false with the intent to deceive.

Things said to deceive are not lies, if they're technically true:

He can say things that he knows aren't true, as long as he makes sure that the other person knows he's joking/sarcastic.

He can say things that are factually wrong, as long as he believes what he's saying to be true. We see this when he tells Ciel that the dead can't be brought back to life, only to find out later that it's possible. Here's an instance where Ciel proves him wrong in a shorter time frame:

The other two rules also leave an uncomfortable amount of wiggle room for Sebastian:

The official manga translation of 絶対 (zettai) is "without question," but the word more literally means absolutely or unconditionally. Ciel ends up having to immediately add a corollary condition to this rule.

(I think "I need a break" could have been translated differently to better reflect what's happening in this scene. The verb form Ciel is using here is called the causative, which is translated as 'make' or 'let', depending on the context. It's obvious that he's only telling Sebastian to let him rest for a bit, but Sebastian, because he's spiteful, chooses to interpret it as 'make me rest for a bit.')

They establish that Sebastian only has to follow orders when Ciel says "命令だ (meireida)," literally "It's an order" but frequently translated as "I command you." However, there are situations that raise questions about how strictly Sebastian must follow these orders.

In the circus arc, Ciel explicitly orders Sebastian to go to the heraldry office AND find out the identity of the circus troup's "father."

When Sebastian was unable to leave the circus grounds, he found another way to identify the man with the signet ring. He accomplished the essence of the order, but what if Ciel specifically wanted him to go to the heraldry office because it would be the most trustworthy source of information? And then when Ciel directly asks him, Sebastian basically lies by omission.

It all works out in the end, but if Sebastian were in a less cooperative mood, he could use this sort of wiggle room to cause trouble for his master. In the next arc, Sebastian seems to disobey a direct order, but it's just another limit of the translation.

At first I thought this was evidence that an order requires intent and that the contract could somehow sense that Ciel didn't actually want Sebastian to get up. However, in the original Japanese, Ciel orders Sebastian to 起きる (okiru), which means to get up OR to wake up. Therefore, Sebastian was technically obeying the order because he was already awake.

When Ciel says "It's an order," he usually exposes the contract seal on his eye, but not always. Sebastian said that the more conspicuous the location of the contract mark, the more power Ciel has access to. I'm assuming this means Sebastian is required to follow all orders, but orders made with the mark exposed allow or force him to draw on more of his power.

Ciel usually keeps the mark covered for lower-stakes commands:

In emergencies, he takes off the eyepatch when he wants Sebastian to put everything he has into following an order.

The name "Sebastian" also seems to be tied to the contract.

Ciel uses it to summon Sebastian, without the need to say "it's an order."

In Kelvin's manor, Sebastian uses it to summon Ciel back from his panicked state.

Outside of explicitly labeled orders, Sebastian does seem to try to be obedient to his master's commands, compelled by the contract or his personal or butler aesthetics.

However, this contract term can at times conflict with the third rule and with his aesthetics, in which case he goes with whatever option he wants while still technically following a rule.

He disobeys a command (albeit not a 命令だ command) in order to protect Ciel's life.

Agni convinces him that it's okay to disobey an order to preserve his master's physical or mental well-being. This isn't because of the contract rule about protecting Ciel, which seems to only cover life-threatening threats (Sebastian has allowed Ciel to be kidnapped and beaten). He disobeys Ciel's orders (again- not a 命令だ order) and "betrays" him in order to indulge his butler aesthetics.

Ciel's orders and wishes can also conflict with eachother. In Kelvin's manor, Ciel's order to burn the children goes against what Sebastian knows to be his wishes: to complete the case assigned to him by the queen. Sebastian doesn't follow the order until Ciel makes it absolute by saying "it's an order."

When Sebastian encounters the same conundrum in the green witch arc, Ciel doesn't say "it's an order," so Sebastian chooses to follow his wish (to finish the case), rather than his spoken order (to go home).

I fear that Sebastian's collar is loose enough that he could slip it off at any moment, but he chooses not to because he's having fun playing the butler game with Ciel. Alternatively, the collar is tight, but it doesn't matter because Ciel doesn't have the strength to control the leash.

[bunnwich]

Same anon about the Leona bf Hcs....I'm also curious, do you have any ICKS when it comes to how people portray Leona romantically? plspls, I wanna get controversial.

My Leona Boyfriend HC Icks

(This is subjective, but you asked! Idk why I wanted to answer this ask before your other one… I guess I felt some type of way. It's a bit more ranty/bitchy so be forewarned. I’ve been in the fandom since the ENG release, so I've seen a lot of stuff that personally icks me. Dw I’ll get to your other ask!!)

Btw, I know some ppl won't like some of these opinions, but it's just my personal preferences at the end of the day! Friendly reminder: I am not the authority on Leona Kingscholar nor do I claim to be!!!

STINKY (But not metaphorically)

Why? He is an athlete and a prince? All the athletes I know bathe MORE than other ppl bc they get sweaty.  Besides…we all have bad hygiene when we aren't doing well mentally? So, this HC at best is just gross, and at WORST is offensive.  Also, just a question for ppl who do STILL this: Why would you WANT him to stink??? I never understood this mindset, even if he WAS that lazy. I simply wouldn’t wanna HC that he stinks. I love myself. GFBHNJM (Idia seems to get this stinky boy treatment too WHYY??? Sorry, I choose to believe my man smells good.)

HERBIVORE. (The H-Word)

I think where people lose me fast in Leona fics is hitting me over the head with the word “herbivore.” Honestly…he doesn't use the word as much as people think?? And I don’t think he would call his S/O at all. I find it mean? Because of the Japanese context of this word, and just the literal meaning. I think of it as more akin to the word “whimp” or “weakling.” It's not…cute to me? He doesn’t even use it for the MC later in the game as much. So, unless you're a lion beastman or fellow carnivore, I’d expect prey nicknames. Kitten, mouse, bird, bunny, etc. He even likens the MC to a “kitten” in a few voicelines. Just makes more sense to me, idk. Think of the silly nicknames he has for the canon cast. That or you know…he’d just use your name.

BRUTE BOYFRIEND

He's rude, sure. But no…Leona is NOT beating anyone up for looking/flirting with you. Would he be annoyed, maybe even secretly furious? Sure. But, he's not a “brute strength" kinda guy who uses his fists. (It’s almost like it's his main battle line!) If someone truly hurt you or did something off-color, he’d probably send someone else to do the dirty work to intimidate or deal with them.  In a real fight, OFC he'd defend you, but fighting cause some guy winked at you? NO. I don’t personally believe so. He’s a grown man with high intelligence, so I think high school like beef would be a bit beneath him?? At least he'd have one of his goons go do it.

ALOOF BOYFRIEND

I think where a lot of ppl lose me is the “aloof/stoic” bf thing.  No doubt he would keep his distance at the first instance of catching feelings because he doesn't wanna be hurt. At first, he’s only batting at you to gauge how you feel for him. But if he becomes seriously interested, and then you begin dating, I just don’t believe he would care what other people think. Or try to downplay your relationship. He’d wait for you to make the first real move, sure…but YOU’D KNOW. I just think about how he acted toward Sally in the last Halloween event and how he was almost “uncharacteristically” sweet to her. I think because Leona isn't super close to anyone in NRC—beyond a few of his frosh or respect-based relationships (like he has with Vil), we don’t see this side of him often, and so it comes as a shock.  Without spoiling anything, let’s just say…he was VERY unbothered at everyone's reaction to his soft side. He was focused on Sally and being nice to her. And if we apply this to “bf status Leona,” I think he’d be too focused on YOU to worry about what other ppl think of him. I’ve been preaching for years that this part of him always existed, and that now he just chooses who sees it. He saves his softness for very specific people he deems worthy of his time. Period. You’ll have to play a bit of a game to get on his good side, but like the motto of Savanaclaw: PERSISTENTLY proving to Leona that you care for him despite his flaws, he’ll come around. And when you're together, well- (I'll save that for the other ask) Especially if you are in an established relationship. He clearly thinks the world of you. He doesn’t have many close relationships, so you think he’s wasting his time with someone he wouldn’t even bother to be nice to??? Besides, Leona later in the main story becomes quite self-aware of his inability to reach out to others, despite craving affection desperately. He knows it's his blind spot, SO he's putting effort into being a good bf to you!

HE'S 20 (45)

To further my above point, I think people forget he is a few years older than even the other 3 years, and…was raised by an old man? I think when ppl write him with low emotional maturity...it loses me. I get it, he's a brat. And often he CHOOSES to act like a petulant prince when it suits him. But, I think deep down esp in more serious situations, we’ve seen that he's wise, calm, and level-headed. Just some nuance, please.

“USING YOU AS A PILLOW”

Napping/cuddling together is no doubt one of the nicest things you can do with a partner. And I’ve even implemented this kinda thing in my writing. HOWEVER, there is a certain flavor of this I dislike. Esp when it’s “forced” on the reader/OC. Sometimes I find this is ALL ppl write about him in those HC posts, esp ones that aren’t Leona focused. That or “Leona dragging you off to be his pillow.”  (A bit of my life is taken every time I read this sentence now…) I know there are new folks coming into the fandom who may repeat old tropes, and that's fine! But, I STILL see this from people who have been here for yearssssssss. It's just cliche to me. I do believe he's a cuddly guy, EXTREMELY SO. It's just that specific phrase that icks me. Maybe it’s the implication that he does it against your will and is aggressive about it?? Just, no thanks.

"I CAN FIX HIM”

Okay maybe now we’re getting into the more controversial ones?? I think the idea of “tru wuv” fixing someone’s flaws is just unappealing as a concept to me and completely against what I think love is about. The “dragging him to class”, “making him dress up more,” or “forcing him to get along with his family” is not something I think he’d put up with. He’s grown, he's extremely stubborn, he knows he’s failing school. He doesn't need another person to nag him! Ruggie already does that! Plus, family relations are complicated. Idk…if someone I started dating tried to get me to talk with a family member who I felt genuinely hurt/neglected me, I’d be annoyed af??   I think he would find it all patronizing coming from a romantic partner. It's one thing if he chooses to be better himself or for his mental health to improve gradually, but forcing things on him and “nagging” him constantly about his behavior at school and at home is just what his family does so- He's flawed, VERY MUCH SO. But, I think when it comes to relationships…everyone has flaws they deal with easier in a partner than others. Like you can maybe deal better with someone being socially awkward, but can't stand your S/O having a messy room. Like if your “hard nos” are lazy people, your S/O dressing “sloppy,” or someone who can be petty and rude to others- Well, you get my point.  It's like....if you hate playing video games and wanna ship with Idia. My question is why?? I’m genuinely curious why you even like this character in the first place?? Hot take, (I guess) this is the reason I don't really ship LeoVil. It just rubs me the wrong way how it turns Leona into a “fix me” project thing. And not to mention how Vil talks to Leona canonically in a demeaning way. (I love you Vil, but you’re wrong.) Leona needs a kick in the ass for sure, all the twst boys do, but personally when a fic/ship leans too heavy on the dynamic of “I can fix/change him” it turns me off. As someone who's been in a long-term relationship… if your day-to-day lifestyles don’t align when living together…ya’ll are gonna be at each other's throats over the small stuff. That’s just how it works irl. And...I understand if everyone doesn't want to apply this logic to fictional ships.  I just personally am not fond of this dynamic. And with Leona being a beastman AND a POC, it often feels like a loaded trope to apply to him.

DISPOSABLE LION BOYFRIEND

Last one! (Maybe most controversial idk) I just think Leona is not good at being a romance rival, (assuming we're not talking about poly situation) despite him being competitive. While ofc I think it's possible for an MC or OC to have multiple crushes and things, I think Leona is someone who wouldn’t handle this well? Like, if Leona feels like he’s gotta compete for scraps of your attention, at a certain point...I'd think he’d just give up, or at least give you your space to come to him. He’s had to compete for attention his whole life, and I feel like he's too emotionally mature and ego-driven to put up with these kinds of games for too long? I DO think it's interesting to explore the dynamic of having multiple love interests!! I even do it for a lil drama! But…in gen I don’t prefer when it feels like Leona is just there to be the "the disposable love interest" considering all of his insecurities of being second. Honestly, in that case, I can see him giving an ultimatum? He's a grown man among...mostly teens, I PERSONALLY just can't see him being a love rival with a child. FGHJK

Anyways, I could go one. that's all I can think of for now!

AGAIN I WANNA STRESS THAT THESE ARE MY ICKS. And if you don’t agree or do any of these, that's okay! Everyone can play dolls how they choose, I’m not the HC or character police. ✌️✌️✌️

[pomefioredove]

hey so can I possibly have a scenario where Azul reveals his octopus form to his s/o and s/o is surprised, but doesn’t mind it. When he keeps being unsure and hides under water, s/o just dives into the water right next to him and kisses him under water? They can’t breathe under water unlike Azul being human.

this is so sweet!! I hope you don't mind, I did a fic instead of headcanons cause it felt right to me

*ੈ✩‧₊˚ "I'd owe you"

summary: in the context of a first kiss type of post: short fic characters: azul additional info: romantic, reader is gender neutral, reader is yuu, established relationship

It's not that Azul is nervous.

Of course not. He's long gotten over the "crush" phase of your relationship. No more butterflies or blushes when he sees you, and for the better.

You're... a part of his life now.

He's not a fool, though.

He knows that each phase of the relationship comes with a different test to pass. And he has passed; the butterflies, the blushing and stammering, the confession, the first date, all with flying colors and his usual bravado.

Now, a month in, he knows the next is imminent.

He is NOT nervous!

He wants to... to be prepared, that's all. But he can't put it off forever.

"Is this strange for you?" he asks, neck-deep in the water.

You, beautiful, effervescent in the moonlight, are sitting on the dock, kicking your legs back and forth. It's high tide, and dark. "No,"

Somehow, in his mind, he thought this would be fine.

"Are you certain? We could go back to school, if you'd like," he says, hopeful you'll change your mind.

"I'm sure," Damn it.

"You haven't let me see you yet, anyway."

Damn it, damn it. Was being in the water in his natural form not enough?

Azul curses himself again. He did agree to this, foolish as it was.

Hesitantly, he lifts one, just one tentacle out of the water. He's trying very hard to keep calm, but he feels like he's being crushed.

You don't react. At all. No teasing, sure, but no reassurance, no smiling, not even that look of awe you so often have. He suddenly feels much colder than the water, and, without thinking, goes to hide.

Again.

The last thing he sees are your eyes, widened in surprise, and then he's underwater.

Azul knows he'll have to come out eventually. He can't just leave you alone on the dock. And he has an exam first thing in the morning, anyway.

But for now, he'd like to wallow. And so he will.

Of course, he should have known better than to think he'd get away with that. In seconds, the surface tension of the water breaks, his calm interrupted by you, you, of course you, suddenly with him.

Azul wants to say something, he wants to hide, but before he can even move, your hands are on his cold cheeks. And then, as if it were the easiest thing in the world, you're kissing him.

The world stops.

For the first time in a long time, he doesn't know what to do.

So, he lets you lead. It's... sort of nice. In a way. Then it sort of feels like you're holding your breath, which is a little- oh, right.

He comes back to his senses, grabs your shoulders, and swims you to the surface.

"Look at you," he sighs. "You're shivering. We need to get you back to school before you catch something."

You say nothing. You're smiling.

Azul sighs again. It's like you hadn't heard a word he said. "Too late for that, then. What are you staring at?"

"You're beautiful,"

His hearts stop. He doesn't respond; if he tries, he knows he'll just make a fool of himself.

Of course. After he was so confident he'd left this awkward phase behind, you manage to give him butterflies all over again.

Finally, he clears his throat. "...Thank you,"

"...But don't think that'll excuse you from drying off and getting warm. I won't have you sick on my behalf. I'd owe you."

Your smile warms with something he recognizes, but can't think of now.

"I think you already do,"

[creatingblackcharacters]

Some General Notes, Week 1

(in no particular order, no you don't have to agree, no they're not "the right answer", no I'm not going to argue. They're just my thoughts!)

-What I definitely enjoyed seeing was (the discomfort and frustration of, rightfully so!) people realizing just how much writing and character design go hand in hand, when told they could not consider the writing! Context is a beast, isn't it? People unfortunately judge with their eyes a lot faster than they bother to read and comprehend (‼️‼️‼️) and so sometimes we have to think about what we've drawn, and what we're trying to or could possibly SAY with that design. It doesn't have to be super detailed, but little things can go a long way.

-White folk tended to overcorrect, with more negative opinions about certain designs than Black and NB fans of color. I don't think it came from a bad place, as much as a place of concern with some lack of understanding.

-Black viewers are overall quite gracious about Black character design if it looks like you cared enough to try (contrary to popular Tumblr and Societal Belief, we don't bite!) But it did sometimes feel that it was to the point of being too nice. There are a lot of Black people who will accept the bare minimum just to feel included, and I hope to one day see less of that. We deserve the effort!

-Measured in three separate groups, we actually tend to be on the same page about design! We won't see the end result of the polls til next week (sorry ahead of time about the poll notification onslaught) so I could be wrong, but usually after the first thirty minutes, our bars tended to trend similarly from what I saw. This is likely due to the bias of my userbase; I'm sure if this poll reached The Unfortunate Masses of Fan Racists, it would be different. We shall see!

-There is usually a beginning wave of NB fans of color that actually find designs better than Black people will, which I found interesting, but then it evens out over time.

-Professional artists seem to be real big fans of the fade. The fade and the killmonger. The fade is funny because fades have been around for decades, and no one ever cared this much, but suddenly there are fades every other character. I wish there were more teeny weeny afros and short locs and just loose curls. Twists too!

-A lot of people were surprised about some characters who were supposed to be Black (and actually were). Which is telling, both on your side as the viewer and their side as the artists! Because that means something was not conveyed, communicated, or understood when you consumed that media!

-Black folk, I love y'all, I'm saying this kindly and I want you to hear me: I think there were times where your emotional attachment to the design affected your answers, even when told to only base it off visuals (e.g., yes, I know that particular character wears wigs! I know that's in the writing! I hear y'all! But unfortunately, when told to look at that character with the pictures provided, without the writing, given the genre, no, that is not an apparent piece of information. I am sorry.)

-I think NB fans of color especially understood this concept, which is just because a character isn't Black doesn't mean they aren't still a person of color. I say that to mean, some of these people felt ambiguously brown to a point that yes, they could be anyone else! 80% of the blue haired characters submitted (and the majority of the gacha ones) fell into this category, imo. Like, we should not all have to share the One Brown for Representation.

-I definitely didn't think that people would assume that the answers were "is this design Black, nonblack, or white"... I must admit that it doesn't make much sense to me 😅 it explained some of the answers I saw, though. Felt like some folks had to be trolling. Unfortunate, not something I can control once posted. Moving on.

-I do wish more people understood that this was meant to be a thought exercise moreso than "this is the right answer" (though sometimes, there was a right answer lmao. Beau is trash IDC.) It's not to gauge "do you know" as much as "based off of what you know, what would you say". It's for you (and me) to gauge where you are! It's okay to realize that you don't know what you don't know!

[undeadentropy]

Major spoilers for dungeon meshi ahead, but I really wanna talk about it.

I really love how the demon is handled. It's not just simply evil. Like every other character in the series, it's motives make perfect sense in context. What happened is one of my favorite ideas to play with in fiction. We all know about cosmic horror, and the madness that comes from perceiving their reality. And the demon, being an infinite being from another dimension, certainly is that. And it does spread chaos in its wake. Infinite mana destroys those who wield it in the end. They become foie gras.

But the truth is that it went both ways. The demon was corrupted by a finite world, where once you eat, once your desires are fulfilled, that's it. Things end. The demon is driven mad by consuming desire, by coming to understand this eldritch place it found itself in. It wished for a paradise where desires are forever fulfilled and it could feast forever. It's infinite mind couldn't accept the limitations of mortal existence. It was never equipped to understand hunger, nor could it ever be filled.

Just like a lone traveler who feasts with the fey, it couldn't go back to the way things were before. It needed more, and the only way to do that was to consume everything, forever.

It might hate Laios for what he did, but he saved it from an eternity of unsated gluttony. Bringing everyone to its realm was doomed to fail. For an infinite being, even all life won't be enough to satisfy. That how infinity works. And that's not getting into the fact that this was the only way to defeat the demon without stripping magic away from the world forever. The demon might just figure out just what a favor Laios did for it, though it might be centuries later. Recovery from addiction is never easy.

Anyway, I just think the way they handled it was neat. Alien is purely subjective. The demon was no more prepared for the mortal world than the mortal world was for it.

[mechncheese]

Answering some AU related asks in this post so I don't flood your feed ! I wanna draw some of these so those will be included in a separate post later on !

Jetfire, Ratchet, Wheeljack and Perceptor are on an Optimus assigned mission so that's why/how they're working together !

Prowl and Brainstorm join them later ! Prowl broke Brainstorm out of prison as a really terrible backup plan after the Jetfire's team gets compromised (full context for the AU's locations can be read here) but in summary, Luna 2, where the team was originally working, was raided by Decepticons. This forced Jetfire's team to jump through the Spacebridge to an unknown location.

Brainstorm and Prowl with the help of others storm Luna 2 and hijacks the Spacebridge so Brainstorm and Prowl can get to Jetfire's team. They only buy enough time for a one way trip so now Brainstorm and Prowl are stuck with the Science Team.

As a pitbull owner, this made me chuckle, I imagine he kinda acts like one too. His whale eye of judgement and him having absolutely no sense of personal space and getting into everyone's business. Sometimes he can look incredibly sad and pathetic. Who want him?

Honestly, he's probably considered it and then went "no, no bad Skyfire ! that's an awful thought !"

HONESTLY REAL, Jetfire would be the designated chef, I imagine he cooks in big ass portions because he eats a lot. Ratchet is the second designated chef of the science team, Perceptor mixed up the salt and sugar and fucked up the soup. Prowl only cooked enough food for himself.

First Aid is like ratatouille while Red Alert would overcook all his food out of fear.

Wheeljack and Brainstorm cook the worst meal ever, forced to be removed from the kitchen. Brainstorm probably steals a bite from everyone's food though just because "it tastes better when it's from your plate"

Thank you ! Brainstorm's wings get in the way of Everyone and Everything and he's probably ruined countless of Percy's (and everyone else's) carefully put together experiments. I think he has similar energy to when someone with a long ponytail turns around and accidentally whacks you in the face but on a much more painful scale.

In no particular order and mostly with the Science Team;

Staying up the longest without recharge

One sided racing with Jetfire, whether it be to the other side of the room, lounging area, kitchen, outside, doesn't matter he just needs to get there first (Jetfire chooses not to acknowledge this)

Engex drinking (He's actually an incredibly lightweight drinker, and the quickest to knock out out of the scientists but that won't stop him from trying)

Getting his lab reports done fastest

He keeps trying to challenge Perceptor in a game of scrabble and keeps losing

anything, and I mean ANYTHING in regards to Brainstorm, he will try his hardest to one up that guy

Wheeljack does not fuck around during group game night

Secretly playing a game of "lets see how many times I can lap everyone around the Science Base"

Glaring contest with Ratchet, whoever looks away first loses (also one sided, Ratchet's lost in thought)

"Do you dare me to do this thing?" "no" "ok im doing it"

Ratchet likes to nap, he's a big fan of getting rest and he definitely needs it, he probably snores like crazy tho. Wheeljack likes to drive long distances, doesn't need a location or anything he just likes driving around. Jetfire likes to read and journal his thoughts, his only way to cope and vent around here </3. Perceptor likes word puzzles, crosswords, word search, etc, he would be a HUGE wordle fan.

They have game nights together, mostly board games.

Brainstorm has never heard of the term “relax” in his life but he does like to push other bot’s buttons for fun. He wants to know what makes them tick. Prowl has never heard of the term “fun” in his life but he does like to sit in solitude and darkness in the quiet away from everyone.

The adding height to his wings bit is really funny omg

But nah, Wheeljack’s not really self conscious about his height. He prefers it over being Jetfire’s height. At least Wheeljack can fit through most doorways.

BAHAHA, where there's Prowl there’s Brainstorm and vice versa. Honestly I’m not sure which guy the Science Team fears more.

I'm sure that when they see Prowl around, they just look around the room for Brainstorm like they've just lost sight of a spider they've been keeping an eye on.

[secriden]

Wild take, but when Style says, "It's okay to love," I really don't think it's actually about love at all.

Let's consider the context leading up to this point: Fadel drives Style to an abandoned factory in the woods and leaves him alone to go and brood for a while. At least part of Fadel's goal is to scare Style, to give him a hint that Fadel is more dangerous than he seems.

But Style doesn't back down, doesn't go running, evidences no sense of self-preservation or worry; and at least on some level it's a clear sign that he trusts Fadel. Despite Fadel literally punching him in the stomach; despite Fadel mocking Style's honest and wanton desire; despite Fadel chasing him away, he still trusts Fadel to keep him safe.

Imagine how frustrated Fadel must be feeling. Style was only gone for one morning, but it was enough for Fadel to become painfully aware that he did not actually want Style gone from his life. He knows now that he won't have the strength to keep refusing Style's relentless pursuit, so he needs Style to be the one to walk away from him instead.

And I think this was a final, last-ditch attempt to make Style run away.

Notice that Fadel starts out rather threatening: "I don't like you messing up my life. My life has been planned out. You're disrupting it." At this point, Fadel could have still turned this violent; attack Style and leave him injured in an abandoned warehouse, and I'm not sure that wasn't still on Fadel's mind at this point. He's incredibly aggressive at first: shoving Style back against the bar, caging Style in between his rigid arms, rattling the metal frame behind Style to show his anger.

But oh, in the heat of the moment, the truth slips out. Fadel is admitting that Style has the power to bring change into his highly regimented and structured life. He's admitting that his desire to keep Style in his life has eclipsed his need for control and structure, in spite of himself.

The truth breaks Fadel open in ways that none of Style's machinations and schemes could. He finally recognises that it is his own feelings that are the true cause of his anger and frustration.

This is the point when Fadel finally gives up on the idea of hurting Style to chase him away. His voice softens (Joong's delivery of "I miss you" makes me weep), his shoulders finally relax, he stops caging Style against the bar and instead it's almost a tentative suggestion of a desire to hold Style.

And I think Style understood this on some instinctive level. Because if you watch Style very carefully, there's a moment of genuine fear when Fadel first shoves him against the bar and then he takes a grim breath like he's fighting off a sense of despair at the at the start of Fadel's rant. Like he could tell this one was going to be a 'make or break' kind of situation.

But when Fadel begins to unravel, when he admits that he was looking for Style when he was gone, there's this almost hopeful, anticipatory look that slowly blooms on Style's face. He's so hungry to see where this goes, and he's gets this intense almost wild look on his face when Fadel pauses to search for his words.

It's incredibly important that Style waited at this point. Style, who talks endlessly and without thought. Style, who demands that his story and his thoughts are aired first. Style, who has been telling Fadel this lie time and time again before Fadel’s feelings made it true... Stops. Waits. Stays silent. Because Fadel had to get there himself or not at all.

Dunk does something incredibly subtle here, but it blew me away: Style does not blink once throughout the entirety of Fadel's rant UNTIL he says "I don't like that I miss you". And that's when Style finally blinks as if it’s finally safe to take his eyes off Fadel. As if there's a wave of relief washing over him as the tension (and sense of danger) finally breaks.

He also does this incredible thing where he softens the look he's giving Fadel right before he drops his eyes down to Fadel's lips. (Joong has always been excellent at this, but Dunk didn’t really get that many opportunities to do this in previous roles). Style is treating this moment so carefully, and there's a purposefulness to this kiss that was entirely absent from the ones Style initiated in the locker room in episode 2.

I also think it's really important that Style was the one to kiss Fadel here. Not just because it juxtaposes the kiss in the store room, but also because Style has shown a strong preference for Fadel taking the initiative. He has been consistently creating opportunities for Fadel to lay hands on him, right from episode 1 when he put the Heart Burger pin on his chest and put his arms behind his head in welcome (and surrender).

But for this to be a functional relationship, Style has to take ownership of his own desire for Fadel. He cannot remain physically passive any longer, because this is the start of something bigger than just the thrill of being wanted. Style is looking beyond what he wants, potentially for the first time, to what his partner needs.

And I wonder, is this maybe the first time Fadel has allowed himself to be kissed since his ex left? There's something so fragile in the wide-shot. The way Fadel only has one hand barely touching Style's hip, while he's still got his other hand clenched tightly around the metal bar like he's desperately holding onto a lifeline. I have so many emotions about this.

Which is why I think this line wasn't really about love at all. This was Style responding to the vulnerability he sees in Fadel and offering reassurance in return. Because Fadel is strong and doesn't need protection, but oh yes he does, for it is his heart that is in danger of shattering.

There's an incredible line in episode 13 of Love In The Air, when Sky (in the aftermath of an extremely traumatic event and after finally revealing the full truth that he was sure would drive Prapai away) turns to Prapai and asks, "P'Pai, can I really love you?" Sky is asking if his fragile heart is really going to be safe in Prapai's hands.

And I think this is exactly what Style is getting at here: He's telling Fadel It's okay to love me. That Style is safe to love. That Fadel can take the risk to let Style into his heart because Style isn't going to take it lightly.

And it's this reassurance that finally allows Fadel to let go: both figuratively (as he starts to take control of the kiss and the encounter) and literally (as he transfers his hold from the metal bar to Style's body). Even the contrast in the wider shots between the kiss before Style says "It's okay to love" and after is startling.

This wasn't really a love confession, not in the conventional understanding of it. But for Fadel, who's mother "loves" Bison and himself for their utility and usefulness, perhaps the assurance of safety is more important.

And for Style, who seems so naive and inexperienced and ignorant of the way the world works in ways that suggest he's never truly had to grow up, this is far more significant. Because he's taking responsibility of someone else's heart for the first time in a way that I don't think he's ever allowed himself before. I said before that Style would be forced to grow up and I do believe this is what we are seeing here.

So no, I don't think this was the moment of "falling in love" but I do think this was the start of something real and meaningful and purposeful that could have eventually blossomed into love for the both of them.

[tcfactory]

Think fast, Sentinel. That is what you are for, after all.

Today on "this is not what I planned to draw, but I think it turned out Neat": a nightmare.

Sentinel from my ongoing fanfic verse, Crossed Sparks.

This won't make much sense without the context of the fic, but I'm basically playing around with the idea of a Sentinel who was custom made for his position of the Principal Aide.

Bonus closeup because this thing is huge: