#theyre just so perfectly imperfect

[interstellarbookofflowers]

happy points bc i cant sleep cuz sensory discomfort (my senses are screaming)

hung out with friend on tuesday! we went for a long walk, got two ice creams and matching froggy bubble blowers. they wore the froggy ring too 🥺

they always send me these little fun video reports of what theyre doing and its so fun to watch

we're going to the gym tomorrow and im rlly excited cuz i havent been in ages!

theres no better feeling than knowing sb cares abt you so much they would hurt someone for you

[gibbearish]

its occuring to me what specifically it is that therapists go to therapy for

[just-spacetrash]

😈😇

[randomwriteronline]

I wonder if the toa mata recognized themselves in their own memories from before mata nui.

I dont know, i think theres possibilities to be explored about that. Suddenly remembering yourself and what you find being a complete stranger is a common thing for amnesia plots i guess but also i think this could be even more jarring. Like a more genuine difference between killing machine and living being.

Its less a matter of nature vs nurture and more a matter of nature with a certain type of nurture. Nature dictates they are powerful and driven and well meaning, but the way they are brought up produces completely different people.

Their first taste of life was a sterile room with nobody but each other and a disembodied voice reading out their duties, establishing an arbitrary hierarchy within them, and then sending them to a glorified bootcamp where a ruthless instructor worked on making them into skilled combatants and nothing else, teaching them how to use their elements as tools and weapons without indulging in them; they got a vague sense of what and how a community feels like with the Av-Matoran - as outsiders, as its protective shield, there for them but not with them - only to get that stripped away from them too because their role as life saving tools to be preserved under glass just in case of a crisis was more important.

I wonder if the Toa Mata, the ones who were taken to the Koro of Mata Nui and listened to the Turaga's tales and reprimands and would have moved mountains for the Matoran who treated them like older siblings, return with their minds to things they said or thought or did from before the Island of Mata Nui and stop in their tracks. Whose memory is that, they think? That can't be mine. I am not like that. My siblings are not like that. Some things are perfectly right, they cant deny that; but just as many if not more are so wrong that they almost feel like a really cruel joke somebody planted into their heads.

Kopaka and Tahu got along, even if they dont want to admit it because they need to bicker like children or theyll die, but are more surprised that they werent as tentatively close with anybody else. Lewa remembers so much frustration and tedium and anger that if he stalls in his memories too much he genuinely starts feeling queasy, Pohatu has remnants of bitterness and passive aggression that still cling to him like the smell of a cigarette on someone who gave up smoking, and they both hate that because its nothing like them. Onua and Gali feel like theyre peering into some kind of imperfect clone's brain when they try to remember - its themselves, they know that, it has to be, but there are certain things they know about themelves that are just completely missing and its kind of dizzying to realize that.

Im not even sure they liked each other. They work together because its their destiny, but they don't seem to seek each other out for fun or anything else. In their training days they had to be shoved in each others direction or they would have never solved their obligatory group assignments.

I wonder if their terrors and flaws could partially come from this first life that they had too. Gali's fear of her anger and Lewa's disregard for duty stemming from Hydraxon's methods - she internalized his reprimands about feeling guilt for living enemies, but without any memory of him she believes the words resurfacing in her mind from time to time are her own, and is appalled by their cruelty; he was forbidden from enjoying himself, from indulging in any form of fun, of entertainment, of joy, and unconsciously now he rebels by shirking away from responsability to do whatever he wants.

The responses to Tahu's decision regarding the codrex haunt him, the whole situation, really; how he stripped his siblings of any say on their fate because he was the leader, not even telling them or explaining himself until they had no other choice, and if he could treat them like that once then what would stop him from doing so again and again until he doesnt even think about it? Kopaka is uneasy about it too. He knew the plan and supported Tahu only because he tagged along, but hes very, very acutely aware that he would have been left just as much in the dark as everybody else otherwise, and he would gave not even had anybody to seek any comfort from because hes fairly certain none of the others would have liked him enough to care.

Onua as @cantankerouscanuck pointed out to me mightve taken Hydraxon's teachings to heart, hence why he's so quiet: no use in expressing weakness, right? But karda nui must have been hellish on his senses, with all that light - a tangible physical discomfort that would bleed out into an emotional one as he becomes conscious of how none of his siblings go through this, thus he must be damaged in some way, faulty, out of place, and so he seeks to be alone, digging himself away. And its not hard to imagine how Pohatu (who hasnt had the chance to grow into the affable, kind toa his siblings can always lean on when they need to yet) would become convinced of his uselessness within the team and seethe about it.

They arrive on Mata Nui as broken war machines with no clue who they even are and suddenly find nature and community and love, and in a moment theyre people.

I wonder if the environment helped. Being thrown upon a beach in the open air with nothing but a whole world that is so alien and yet feels so right beckoning them to come closer. Discovering their powers and their domains freely, immediately - first thing they did was dive into their respective elements without a second thought, naturally magnetized, taking after them like it was the simplest thing in the world, because they are the first toa, the first beings capable of harnessing these powers in their whole universe, and its in their nature to be so connected to them. Maybe it helped. Maybe it made them feel connected to their own selves enough to figure themselves out in a way they couldnt have done so before.

Maybe it helped to find out their collective destiny each on their own, in their own environment, at their own pace, surrounded by younger siblings who look at them with awe and curiosity and frustration sometimes, guided by people who know how being alive works with all its good parts and messy bits and who can tell what having so much power means when youre barely aware of how to use it or what to do. And maybe it helped to find out who their siblings were in a similar way, introducing themselves as they wanted, as they felt like, without a specific order, and learning to recognize each other as siblings with all the things that make them insufferable and all the things that make them the best and what makes them happy and what makes them angry and how they sound when theyre worried and how likely they are to chase you down to the other edge of the island for doing something stupid, and like real people they grow and develop and change and stay the same, and then they meet the memory of themselves from before becoming people and its...

Idk. Its like the realization of who they used to be and the distance between themselves and those selves, and the fact that they dont like them.

[shock]

I walked into the print shop we're going through for my collages to drop off the last batch and our conversation went:

Me: Hi I think [x] called earlier to let you know I was coming to drop these off!

Guy 1: yep, I'll take those, here's the ones we've finished so far, I'm not happy with them (starts pointing out the little imperfections, apparently they had set up the lamination to try to do all the EDGES PERFECTLY???)

Me, blown away: no no that's fine, the only thing I'd care about is if they got ripped, it's okay that they're not 100% sealed I just wanted them laminated so I wasn't worried about the text falling off

Guy 1: ohhhh, okay! So are you the head of this project?

Me: [thinking he means the grant] oh no haha I'm just the guy that makes these

Guy 1: Wait, you made all of these?

Me: yeah!

Guy 2, coming in hot: like ALL of them?

Me: yeah!

Guy 1: oh man, that's a lot of cutting

Me: haha yeah it's my craft!

Guy 2: you're a maniac, these are so cool. We've been looking through them and, wow, yeah, that's a lot of work

Me: well if you want to come see them my gallery opening is (time date)! They're gonna hang from the ceiling!

Both of them, realizing why they are the way they are: ohhhhh

Me: but yes that's pretty much all I need them laminated for, so I can put hooks on the back without actually cutting into them. Can I take these finished ones or

Guy 1: [hands me some of them]

Me: thank you thank you these look so good. I've been telling everyone dropping them off makes me feel like I'm dropping off my kid at daycare for the first time

Laughter + Guy 2 as im leaving: I just can't believe it. Wow. That's so much cutting

The vibes were so awesome i love how much they cared. And its soooo charming that theyre just sitting there looking at all of these and they thought it must have been done by some TEAM.😭😭😭😭 I just love cutting paper. If I don't I'll kill people.

[kozykricket]

theres so many cool tidbits ive gathered of cut concepts from ror2 and honestly . ill keep them all safe, but until theres clearly explicit permission that theyre wanted to be shared, ill keep em quiet to myself

HOWEVER ill say one of them that ive found. a lil void design tidbit

one of the thought processes for the visual design of void items was apparently like, what would an aliens view of this object be? just like, a weird version of it

which like, yea i can see that - they serve the same Ultimate FUNCTION as the actual item, but in different ways. theyre contorted in ways that wouldnt bother the void i imagine. like, needletick? its something small that can kill in a gruesome way. polylute? well it can probably make some sounds. maybe doesnt sound perfectly tuned though.

anyways like. logbook brainstorming

okay hear me out. the void is trying to replicate a teddy bear. they notice it is a small figure of a creature often associated with protection, and as such offers comfort. they then try to replicate simply that: an idol of a being that they associate with protection. the most survivable creature we know of. id also like to imagine its rock hard because the idea of it being a plush was. well, they didnt realize that was the point of a teddy bear

*or perhaps theyre just faulty replications that the void knows are imperfect and are just remnants of trying to make a perfectly simulated version!*

the idea of a logbook where someone tries to show a void reaver that they just want a teddy bear and . then being brought back a stone statue/idol of a water bear, is just really funny to me. like yeah! its… close enough. sure.

[calebwittebane]

do you have any life advice

ok here goes. follow your curiosity and learn as much as you can about everything--if you find yourself wondering about, like, the history of stove tops while youre cooking your meal, the internets at your fingertips. this ones difficult: try not to get mad at yourself for having emotions, whatever they are allow yourself to feel them, but avoid leaving them uninterrogated and never let that untangled version of them guide your course of action or paint your self-image. remember that you cant actually influence the world with your thoughts alone--for better and for worse, your mind is entirely private. for every thing you know theres an infinite amount of things you dont know, so its okay or even highly advised to sometimes just admit you dont understand or dont have enough info to participate in the conversation. dont be tempted to fall for some evopsych quasi-religious 'everything is simple and perfectly designed, existentialism is pointless, we already have all the answers, stop being ungrateful' shit, i see young people parrot that garbage all the time, its so smug and vapid and fosters deep incuriosity and a lack of compassion. try to understand that while it may seem like one's mind is its own universe, that's because the universe is in fact incomparably larger and so insanely far beyond the scope and capacity of a human mind, and rather than feel satisfied with own complexity, expand the impossibly narrow slice of it all that you get to comprehend. in a similar vein, some things can simultaneously be huge and overwhelming, and marvelously insignificant and tiny--and there is no judgment in which one it appears to be from your perspective. you are not ontologically incapable of harm, and no one is ontologically incapable of being harmed. the agreed upon definition of classical music and what is considered music theory are all eurocentric and white and beyond imperfect so jot that down and let go of that as somes sort of underlying unerring baseline. you cant just log into social media and successfully define what art is without leaving the majority of it out, you dont know nearly enough about the world and art to be able to define something thats been evading definition for as long as its existed. its chill man relax. nuclear families are a scam. thinness-as-default is a scam. money is a scam. being cis is a scam. country borders are a scam. a lot of things are a scam and even if its impossible to opt out just being aware theyre a scam makes things more bearable. be nice to your friends and be nice to yourself. dont spend money on gacha games. play pokemon white on nintendo ds.

[redactedgender]

— ELLIOTT BA SPOILERS —

this is me liveblogging the entire ba. theres lots of screaming. youve been warned.

18+ only obviously

FIRST OF ALL. called this. i KNEW this fucking audio was coming. literally called it. second of all, this is my first time liveblogging so idk if thisll be good or not ahgjsdfkl

OOO DREAMSCAPE NOISESS. i love how twinkly they are

him teasing themmm :(( i love themb

"we dreamwalkers call it 'the ingress'" love how erik drops dreamwalker lore in this ba thats so funny

elliott is so giggly and sweet sounding :((

"yknow, i can judge you on the fact that you have a dream about shopping at a grocery store... [laughs] no, no i will never let you live that down" STOPPP thats so cute him referencing his first audio with them awwweeee

eriks voice acting has gotten so good. like the stutters and imperfections feel like genuine instead of scripted, like hes actually elliott actually floundering for words a little. its sogood

(are you okay?) "no no, i'm- i'm okay" STOPP literally what did i say before. it sounds so genuine and like real

"y'know how some days you just feel kinda... off?" mood king. but also. is this bc of the memory modification brachium did?

"... i dunno. it's just- it's been kind of a weird day ... i mean, i don't even know what i'm talking about ... like you know when you have a bad dream, and even though you know its a dream ... and it shouldn't have any impact on you, but the rest of the day you feel off" HEY NOW. HEY NOW.

"i mean i'm not a huge people person most of the time, maybe its that, maybe hanging out with aaron and his partner drained my battery a little" honestly if i didnt know what the deal was id be like yeah same

"i know we didnt have any dreamscaping planned tonight but i... i didn't really wanna spend the night alone in my head if thats okay. it- it almost feels like... like i miss you?? or like i had been missing you?" BRACHIUM WHEN I CATCH YOU BRACHIUM. SHUT UPPP OH MY GOD :(( thats actually so fucking sad and sweet. like his body and his brain remembers missing sunshine so fiercely but the memories arent there so he just feels off-kilter and like he misses them for some reason WHAT THE SHIT :((

"you havent had a work trip for a while, we spent all night together. you're literally laying next to me in bed in the waking world, like, you're right there! like i could wake up and poke you right now" he is so goofy and silly but not in a guy way and i really appreciate that

"[im a little tired] and maybe a little sappy. i guess i just hadnt gotten my fill of you today" HEHEHEHE...

THEYRE KISSINGGGGGG

"i just wanna be with you rn, and i dont know why ... no, no thats not what i meant!" I LOVE HOW SUNSHINE RIBS ON HIM :(( like they really are just besties who fell in love

i love the way elliott kisses sunshine. if that makes any sense dhjgfshd

"i love being with you [kiss] in dreams, in reality, anywhere. if its you, im happy." when is it my turn god.

"im just the boy next door... the boy next door with a brain that can handle managing the near infinite minutia of an entire dreamscape, flawlessly under pressure, at a labyrinth black certified level. yknow, simple stuff like that" WOW YOUR HONOR IM IN LOVE WITH HIM

"i mean it really is simple when it comes to you. you're there? im happy. you're not? im not. and right now i could use some happy" theyre the cutest couple god im ill abt them

"the dreamhouse- pardon the pun" IM SO EMOTIONAL OVER THAT WAIT :(( HE CALLS THE HOUSE HE MADE FOR HIM AND SUNSHINE THE DREAMHOUSE

"ba-dum-bum!" im making out with him rn

"yeah, well, if you didn't like a dork, you wouldn't have stuck around. cuz i am one, through and through. and you knew that; you've known that as long as you've known me" and when i throw myself into the sea then what. then what

"starting us in the bedroom is a perfectly logical start to the dream" its also a good starting point for me to rail you-

GOD THE WAY ERIK DOES MAKING OUT... like the softer kisses to start, how they slowly start getting deeper as they get more into the kiss..... incredible

THE WAY HE MAKES SURE SUNSHINE ISNT FORCING THEMSELF TO FUCK CUZ HE PUT THEM IN THE BEDROOM :((

i just realized we're gonna get updated elliott Noises. ogh. im so excited

sunshine really does love taking care of him :((

WAIT ARE THEY BLOWING HIM??? THIS IS THE LASKO BA ALL OVER AGAIN. ERIK GIVE US LIKE. SOMETHING TO KNOW WHEN THE LISTENER IS GOING DOWN ON THE SPEAKER DHFJGAFHGS

god his NOISES. hes so vocal n i love it

I LOVE WHEN THE SPEAKERS CALL THE LISTENERS BABY AS A SECOND PET NAME ITS SO CUTE. also. elliott just has the cutest noises wowow

"can i hold your head?" THATS HOW YOU DO IT FOLKS. also babygirl you can pull my hair any day of the week

I LOVE HOW BREATHY HE IS??? also some of his noises are deeper than i wouldve expected from him but i love it so much :flushed:

HE WAS STANDING THAT WHOLE TIME??? GODDAMN SUNSHINE

WHOA WHOA WHOA WHAT WAS THAT NOISE HELLO???? THE STUTTERING RASPY MOAN????? WHAT THE FUCK????? THAT WAS THE HOTTEST NOISE EVER WHAT THE SHIT

i just KNOW hes holding sunshine by the head not to control the pace but to steady himself and to have something to hold onto while they suck his dick like a pro

WE LOVE A MAN WHO KISSES THEIR PARTNER AFTER ORAL SEX

"oh god the things you do" SIR IM ON THE FLOOR RN WHAT WAS THAT FUCKING VOICE???????

"is it too bright?" mans has the sun reacting to his emotions thats so cool and also hot

"im looking at you... you look so incredible with the horizon behind you" im going to propose if you keep talking to me like that

"i got the idea from that trip we took up to the lake" ERIK GIVE US SOME FLASHBACKS TO THEIR CAMPING TRIPS PLEASE i would love one where theyre not dating yet but theyre obviously dancing around it god thatd be so good

"all these oranges and reds and purples... eyes shining in the waning light" hes so romantic

"hey... i have an idea" oh?

"howd you like to see that sunset up close?" ARE WE GONNA FUCK IN THE SKY??

"do you trust me?" YES YES YES

THE WAY HE IMMEDIATELY GRABS ONTO SUNSHINE TO REASSURE THEM AND SAYS THAT HES GOT THEM :((

ARE THEY IN A CLOUD???? WHAT THE FUCK???

"you deserve it... everything beautiful and wonderful, you deserve it." god hes so good at making sunshine believe they have worth in this life :((

i love how you can tell when erik is kissing someones lips vs when hes kissing their skin. the noises are so subtle yet distinct and its so good at helping you realize where things are happening. but also... sunshine where are your clothes sjdfhkg

"d'you-do you like it?" HIS LITTLE HESITATION LIKE HES WORRIED SUNSHINE DOESNT LIKE THE DREAM STOPPP :(( hes so fucking cute i cant stand it

"lay back... let the clouds hold you" ok real talk i have a bad phobia of heights (specifically the edge of things) but i would brave my phobia if it meant a hot dreamwalker was going to fuck me in the clouds

"sunset skin... my sunshine" I AM ON THE FLOOR AGAIN THIS IS THE MOST ROMANTIC THING :(( i love when he says "my sunshine" CUZ THEY ARE HIS SUNSHINE IN MORE WAYS THAN ONE!!!!!!

"can i?" YOU FUCKING BETTER GO DOWN ON ME DUDE

HIS FUCKING GIGGLES?? "okay... then spread 'em a little bit" HIS VOICE IS SO SOFT AND TEASING ALMOST WOWOWOW

erik knows how to make gender neutral oral sex work very well. im genuinely impressed

"so good..." sorry but if someone said that after going down on me i would marry them on the spot

"can i?" YOU BETTER FUCK SUNSHINE RN IM GOING CRAZY IVE BEEN WAITING FOR THIS FOR LIKE FOUR FUCKIN YEARS

GOD HIS NOISES?????????? THEYRE SO LIKE. ROUGH. N ALMOST FERAL. AND SO APPRECIATIVE????

"just a sec... god it feels so good... just to be inside- all the way... together" WOOOOOOOW WOW WOW WOW IM SO LONELY HOLY SHIT HJGSDAHJ

"yeah i just wanna feel it for a sec... all of it... all of you" hes so lustdrunk rn its craaaaaazy woooooow. i mean considering this is the first time theyve fucked in days after the events of the balance (not that they remember it) im sure it would feel overwhelming

"lemme see your neck" god n the way he marks them up...... plus its a callback!! we love a callback!! technically its a callback to two diff things, his first ba and his "dreamwalker bf helps you in your dreams" when theyre on the beach!

"oh yeah.... moan for me" HIS VOICE. HJDFGKFGHKDJ!!!!!!!! ./////. "yeah? its just us, and the sky; let it all out." him encouraging them to be loud?????? what the fuck????????

pleasuredrunk elliott is something i knew i needed but didnt know i needed this badly holy shit

"you look so incredible.... no, no, not just the sunset. the sunset's just casting a light on whats already there" WHOAAAAAAA. THATS SO???? ROMANTIC?????? HOLY SHIT???????

"all the imperfections are what make you perfect. make you real... warm, and real, and here... with me" WOW THATS. YEAH. OW. THAT HURTS A LITTLE

I LOVE WHEN HE CALLS THEM MY SUNSHINE HEHEHEHE

god his NOISESSSSS i cant get over them. he sounds so obsessed with sunshine its crazy.

"no- no let me, let me... i wanna be the one to make you come" AAAAAAAH!!!!!!!

i love when the speakers jerk off/touch the listener to help get them close. like its so intimate and hot.

n the noises of him touching them,,,

"yeah, yeah, get loud," SIR??? SIR???????

"feeling me while im..... in you..." the way his voice like dissolves into pleasure is craaaaazy. erik what are you fucking to make those noises??

"throw your head back... let the clouds hold you while i fill you up-" WHOAAAA WHOA WHOA WHOA!!!!!!!!!!!!!! JGHDFKFGDHJKSDGKFHJDKGH!!!!!!!!!!!!!

"youre tightening down...... now?... yesss, yes sunshine, come for me, come-" OH MY FUCKING GOD??????????????

HIS NOISES????????? FUCK ME????????????

AND THE WAY IT SOUNDS LIKE HES PANTING INTO THEIR NECK/CLOSE TO THEIR SKIN,,,,,, GOD. GODDDDDDD.

AND THEN HE BRINGS THEM BACK TO THE BED. HIS FUCKING SHUSHING AND THE "no its okay, i got you" GODDDD

their aftercare kissing n cuddling. wow :((

"i love you so much, baby... you make me feel so good... you feel so... right. its just easy with you. its real with you, even here, where none of it is.. real. its us. and that makes it- real ... in my arms.. its real." THATS SO FUCKING SWEET WHAT THE FUCK

"i never wanna have to miss you again" SHUT THE FUCK UP ERIK IM GONNA FUCKIGN CRY

"we're forever" THEY ARE THEYRE SO FOREVER LIKE THEYRE GONNA GET MARRIED AND BUILD THAT DREAM HOUSE AND GROW OLD TOGETHER PLEASE ERIK :(((((((

"i love you sunshine" mirroring the end of his first ba I WILL CRY

and the really soft kisses as the audio fades out :((

WOW that was. wow. i mean. what else can i say dude????? that was so fucking good. best ba we've had in easily awhile. holy fuck dude

[sweet-milky-tea705]

I keep accidentally wanting to worship gods of darkness and stuff from fictional media. Something about the drama of it all. The sensuality. Let me sink into the depths of your cool and grief ridden embrace. Hide me from the searing light of the world, snuff me out entirely. You represent hate and pain. Lament and want. Deep and unfulfilled festering want. Ohhh is it easy to slip away. Leaving me both fearful and comforted in the same dark abyss. Until i am numb and nothing, the light never deserved me anyway. Ohhh the drama. Lady of Sorrows guide us, Dragon of the deepest depths. No room for purity. And yet light can always overcome shadow. As much as light chases it, darkness lingers just beyond always. Theres comfort in knowing theyre both escapable. Always escapable, light and dark in perfect imperfect balance. Is darkness the absence of light or is light the absence of darkness ? They compliment eachother perfectly, opposite reflections of the other combined in my eyes so i can see the worlds boundless contrasting beauty. Im so lucky to be alive and so lucky to teeter constantly in the grey between. Do i expose myself to the light of pure genuine emotion or fall into the inky depths of grief and yearning. How beautiful is it that i can crawl out into either. The moon like a white immortal wound in the night sky's infinite darkness guides me through the shadows and the sun's light dapples through the leaves of the tree that shades me from the same brightness. This has always fascinated me but ive never bothered to type it. I read too many stories and am far too dramatic for my own good but i am a slave to my whims and will follow where ever they take me. Through light and grey and dark. And through useless blog posts i'll wish i deleted

[wizzycore]

Nonhuman Showdown Round 3

Why you should vote for each of them and full art below!

Wood/Woodie/Woodrow (species: construct, by @aberrantparadox, art by @kurofae)

"Woodrow isn't a human, and Woodie isn't a person, though they do like to roleplay as one. Are they cool? What are they? They aren't even sure. Woodie, Woodrow.... they're not even the being's names, simply names extrapolated from the common answer they give to the question of they are ("....uhm....I'm wood"). They're human shaped but not human looking, with a human heart but not human emotions, they're a machine in a literal sense but also a metaphorical one as they do do their duty as told, but they're also doing it of their free will - theyre certainly a thinking person but they aren't. It would be wrong though to say they're looking for real personhood, though, or to be utterly rid of personhood also - they're searching for something beyond that, and beyond the spiral too, they think. Something like the jungle of stardust they always see in their "dreams".

There's the factual part - as in, they're a wood mannequin made by Merle Ambrose to fight off Malistaire and other threats. Well, they're actually just plucked from Golem Tower and altered. Their concept was brought up before Malistaire went rogue, and then abandoned. Woodie is the golem, and the magic possessing it, and the heart of the fallen champion of Bartleby, and the heads. He is also none of these at any given time. It isn't his heart - it lives in their chest cavity with all their gears, things that belong to them, indubitably, and is theirs, as much as their heads are or aren't.

Their heads - each professor made a different swappable head distinctly tuned to their school of magic, so that their new champion could perfectly and easily master all the schools. They're necessary to channel the magic inherent in other tools, for someone/thing who otherwise has no magic within them. Each head feels different to use for Woodrow, gives different consequences and a different mindset, but the spirit doesn't become different beings, unless you define a being by its personality and magical energy - a common definition. Woodrow leaves it open. They can see out of any of the heads, or all at the same time, having 7-fold (and eventually 9-fold) vision. They don't need any attached to their body to move, think, or function, but they do need them to cast spells, and when in the field its better to keep at least one head attached just in case. Their weird sight also lets them see stranger things, like invisible beings, currents of magic, and other phenomena. They can't gape at any of that though, because they don't have a face, and they wouldnt anyway, because they came into the world that way and none of this is surprising. But it is a bit lonely.

Feelings are difficult when youre made of wood and don't have human sensations. Most emotions Woodie experiences are muted and overlaid with boredom or a sort of diffuse nothingness. But occasionally they do feel something properly, and that is the most vast thing in the world to them. They deeply care about other beings and will readily use violence to keep the majority safe. They're unsympathetic to those who hurt others out of hurt, but aren't cruel. Every being, secure in their self, breathing with lungs and gills and magic, even the evil ones, are a wonder to Woodrow, and like the person who once had his-but-not-his heart, protecting those beings in their perfect imperfection - just to look at them - just to look at them, it's everything, just to look at them...."

Quinn Soulthorn (species: dryad, by @sentient-cloud)

"Quinn Soulthorn, a dryad of one of those spooky death trees that seem to be everywhere. He grew up in Avalon’s Wyrd over the corpse of one an unlucky member of the wild hunt, the spine of which makes up his harp, along with his own wood. He’s delighted to be allowed into Ravenwood and learn about the world outside of the Wyrd, even if he’s still really learning how people work. He’s not beating the unseelie allegations.

People tend to find him off putting. He’s far too eager to tell people about the beauty and inevitability of death, and he brings a kind of “stop raising so much undead you’re disturbing the role decomposition plays in the perpetual cycle of existence” vibe the other necromancers don’t like. Merle is especially wary of him, after all, was the Wyrd not the source of the horned crown that damned Avalon and introduced his pupil to Shadow magic in the first place?

He’s doing his best, he isn’t as oblivious to people’s hesitancy towards him as some may think. Additional fun facts: his pet “ghulture” is an undead Avalon crow that hung around the spooky death tm graveyard he popped up in. Whenever he takes root he leaves behind a mushroom circle. He even has trans swag. TtM (tree to male)"

[glamfellens]

just to expand on the benny/harriet vibes bc theyre in my brain and well whats the point of being here if not to inflict my blorbo thoughts on my followers the core of their dynamic is that benny is the ideas guy while harriet is the woman that gets shit done. while he wasnt lucky enough to pull the plan off, benny was still the brains behind the idea of hijacking a securitron to infiltrate mr house's system and lead new vegas to true independence. and i think its important to note that he cares enough about new vegas's independence from the ncr, legion and mr house to pass this plan onto the courier. its clearly bigger than benny placing himself at the top and replacing house

we even hear from tommy torini that while benny doesnt have an ear for music he is good at business. so while benny doesnt always make the best decisions (i.e sleeping with the courier he shot) and there seems to be a lot of fluctuation when it comes to his characterisation (i feel like all roads benny and game benny are two different people??) i dont think he's stupid and his plan could have worked not to paint benny in an entirely ideal light mind you, since this is fallout and benny being benny i imagine he had at least a few less than altruistic motivations behind his plans lol meanwhile for harriet she didn't spend the first part of the game giving too much of a shit about what happens to the mojave. she's ncr herself but her opinion only really went so far as "i wouldn't stick around if the legion took control". harriet starts by helping the ncr out around the mojave because thats her home state and even though she left, she still feels some loyalty. not a lot, but some. but as she gets pulled into the middle of all these escalating tensions by mr house and learns of benny's plan through yes-man she spies an opportunity to play these big players (colonel moore, mr house, caesar) at their own game. they all seem perfectly comfortable using her to their own ends, so harriet decides to do the same in kind. secretly. she helps the people of the mojave out, especially in freeside. harriet comes to care about the independence of the mojave and its people in her own way but ultimately she is moved by the idea of putting herself where mr house is. she wants to be at the top. she figures after spending the last few years roughing it shes owed some luxury and some glamour. after all, she is currently doing all the hard work. (is harriet dazzled by the bright lights and fast living of new vegas? yeah) i dont know what im saying here. i think ultimately harriet's pragmatism compliments benny's idealism and in return his idealism benefits from her more pragmatic approach. new vegas will benefit so long as harriet & benny themselves benefit but i think their individual desires for power, success, safety and comfort often clash i like the idea of them coming together to take charge of new vegas as an imperfect ending because while they are looking forward and not succumbing to old world blues like the ncr or legion, benny and harriet are two big personalities with egos to match and i think some decisions they make are more to their individual benefit rather than that of vegas and the mojave. not that i think vegas becomes a hedonistic pit of manhattans and gambling and dean domino friday night performances. thats definitely there but i think areas like freeside see an improvement that they wouldnt have seen under mr house. the management of the strip becomes a collaborative effort between the chairmen, omertas and white gloves instead of the autocracy mr house had in place.

yeah

[otterloreart]

weird resin things this morning

yesterday i decided to test if cosclay could be used to mold resin eyes, and i made two simple half-sphere molds, baked them, and poured some clear resin (from the cheap resin kit video) in them. i also poured some resin into the resin molds that came with the cheap kit since i had leftover resin.

this morning i pulled one of the mushrooms out of the resin kit mold, it worked perfectly fine like it had before. i then struggle to pull the half-spheres out but i got them out successfully. they're perfect round half-spheres, theyre fairly clear although not perfectly so but i think i can fix that with some varnish (the lack of clarity is from imperfections in the surface, so i think adding shiny varnish should make it more transparent). so far the experiment is going well!

but then, after i varnished the half sphere and the one mushroom, i was like i guess i should varnish the other mushroom, butterflies and cherries. went to pull out the other mushroom and it... just isnt done? i got uncured resin on my finger, it was very sticky.

its completely baffling to me why some of the resin in the original mold hasnt cured yet. granted, its been only about 24 hours, but previously they all cured to at least be removable from the mold overnight. and the two mushrooms are literally identical, and all the resin was mixed in the same container... so i dont know whyy half of one of them wouldnt be finished.

anyways, wild stuff, that resin. im glad that the important parts of the experiment (the eyes) seem to have worked out, although the cosclay molds got somewhat damaged in the process.

[keroppidreams]

interrupting your daily dose of government assigning blorbos with tamagotchis to dump 🧋🍓lore featuring kin.tama arc. some thoughts under cut!

OK SO KIN.TAMA IS ACTUALLY MY FAVORITE ARC IN GNTM (I cannot watch that one scene without bawling my eyes out rip) SO I'VE BEEN PRETTY EXCITED TO THINK ABOUT KLARA WITHIN THE CONTEXT OF IT. SO WITHOUT FURTHER ADO HERE WE GO:

Okay as sweet and ditzy Klara can be, she's in denial about how she feels about gin. 90% is due to her inexperience/unfamiliarity with romance. plus as my SI she has to embody the struggle i experienced while watching the show ("I dont like gin. hes an ass" -> 20 episodes later -> "I-I'M NOT FALLING FOR HIM OR ANYTHING...HES JUST OK..." -> 40 eps later -> lovey-dovey mode activated everything he appears). The other 10% is cause it's gin. hes a fucking menace to society. you know she'd get concerned looks if she admitted to someone that she LIKES-LIKES him. plus she probably lowkey worries that he'd make fun of her or something if she admitted it.

so imagine gin's surprise when he sees klara's interactions with kintoki and she's incredibly sweet to him (maybe too sweet). theres no bickering, no flustered outbursts, no awkwardness. they're getting along perfectly. there's fucking shoujo moments and everything. in other words, it's gin's relationship with klara but without the imperfections and quirks.

live gin reaction:

side note: he definitely turns petty af and does some over-the-top things every time kntk and klara have a shoujo:tm: esque moment.

"WHOOPS! MY FOOT SLIPPED!" *roundhouse kicks kntk in the face*

jokes aside, he definitely has mixed feelings about it. at some point he probably has a brief epiphany and realizes "fuck. is this jealousy?"

of course, he forces himself not to dwell on it for long due to the current situation and it's gin. hes going to try to not acknowledge for various reasons (particularly his shit self esteem and perception of self)

(she deserves better. what does he even have to offer? he's broke. lazy. haunted by the ghosts of his past--)

"...hm? Did you say something, Tama? Sorry I was thinking about the latest issue of JUMP."

As for Klara? She's definitely kind, but distant whenever she interacts with gin (at least until he starts trying to fight kin then she gets pissed). tho sometimes she gets random bouts of nostalgia whenever gin opens his mouth and brings up specific memories/events. then she starts feeling like she's missing something important...

So when she does snap out of the hypnotism and realizes what she has done (turn against gin and tried driving him out of town with the rest of the cast), she's definitely feeling guilty. a part of her feels awful and doesn't want to face him, but forces herself to do it anyways

even if shes crying and blubbering through her apologies even though gin isn't angry at her or anything.

of course that doesn't stop him from messing with her a bit once he helps calming her down by being like "y'know...you could make it up to me by buying me a par--"

klara, nyooming out of the place and returning in 5 seconds: H-hERE! ONE CHOCO PARFAIT!

dude definitely takes advantage of it the first couple of times, though soon knocks it off once he realizes that she genuinely feels guilty about the whole thing and is desperately trying to make it up to him

though after a couple days, things start to go back to normal and their routine of playful bickering and chaos starts to return. might not be perfect, but neither of them mind. it's the way it should be, and they wouldn't ever change it.

okay except the fact that theyre pining for the other and literally everyone and their dog can see it but thats an issue for another arc--

[1-800-dialing-angels]

Ya know everyone portrays depression and other related mental health as all doom and gloom and sitting in the dark in a huddle exhausted and wanting to end it. Normally it is. For me it often is. Something went wrong and im crying or too exhausted to cry curled up in a corner or in bed. I think about how the world sucks and people shck and no matter what you do life is nothing but struggle and suffering and pain. You get happy moments and theyre always taken by something. Theres always something. It never ends.

Meanwhile these last few days have been nothing but

Sitting on the porch swing. Its chilly out. The birds are singing so beautifully. The stars look so pretty. The way the tree swings in the gentle breeze. I smile and watch the sky soaking it in. This would be a perfect night to get the gun and shoot myself

Im in the car. One of my favorite songs is playing. Just watched an amazing movie in the theater. Watching cars go by, trees go by, i love seeing it all even though ive seen it a million times. I smile and think to myself how the world is so beautiful and fleeting, I should get the gun while I can before something bad happens again and let my last seconds be in pure joy

Im in bed. Its so cozy. My cats and dog are cuddled up to me. I spent the day with my friends and it was so much fun. I wonder if theyd miss me. I wonder if i should tell them. Should i leave a note. A note about how perfectly imperfect everything is, how beautiful. How i wasnt sad and i wasnt angry. Everything was perfect. I wanted these perfect last few days to stay with me forever.

I wish i could do what so many people do. Look at how beautiful the world is and think it's something to live for. Every happy moment makes me think i should let it be my last memory so i can treasure it in eternity. Or in the case oc nothingness, those i leave can remember those happy days and my smile and how much i was enjoying life

[kawaiicherryblossomperfection]

ew! ghetto likes cats ew! ghetto likes black ppl ghetto nasty ghetto twang ghetto nasty! ghetto twang geto real ghetto nasty ghetto stfu! ghetto leave choi yeonjun in the past and jisung too! nct dream? theyre ghetto get me high keeho yoon ew ur ghetto real ugly ghetto ugly ghetto fuck u bitch ghetto stfu and die dick and pussy is a phrase of words ghetto bitchs put ur dick on me rn and fuck off bitch no! im good on that front desarae! its boobs dick mcgee lava mcgee ur a mcgee? ew its magee u faggot rainer down upon the morning moonshine ghetto real real ugly ghetto twang ghetto real real ugly ghetto twang ghetto fuck u! stupid ass bitch u real ugly today get jiathon off of me i want u to put ur comfortable ase dick in my mouth u faggot bitchs ew! ur a cop ew! whats that? im a gang bang star and that is the real ghetto the suicide boys turning up!!! ew ur a faggot bitch? what the fuck bitch! we love turn up time ew ur a faggot rain? ur a fabric downer softner ew ur a faggot bitchs! thank u mafia but i go to high school public school university aka princeton high school no? shes a faggot rainer ew! u let the mafia ruin ur comic book? no its a manga! and i like her softeners wow! ur a pussy ew ur a faggot rainer! ew keeho is a downer bitch ass mother fucker bitch! i have chinese parents who love u like a child

ew! ur a faggot bitchs hahha i really do have parents who care about me? faggot rainer ew! shes not a boy shes q straight a student hahha ew! i have faggot friends and nopeA told u no parents are aloud to help u! faggot rainer ew! perfect? i said perfectly imperfect so thats why u cant find me here? ew shes had enough of this episode! so go home faggot britney spears - metamorphosis b is the best song in the world! again? ew faggot rainer! ur dead to me bc that song never left skateboarders are about to get words taken out of them again! ew she couldnt talk at all! ew im a dead god yes worship us! no u cant desarae does already ew! shes upset with me? i said something funny! ew she doesnt like me or set me up with bad skanks thank u again shes going home tomorrow night! ew the tension gave her w headache her braim didnt explode the tension got away ew its faggot aggression ew its just a magic trick! ew i got away with murder ew! i didnt ew! i didnt see u there? ew ur raping my eyebrows next! ew 5pm nvm! its faggot 5 o clock ew! i its 5 pm what the fuck babe? ew ur a faggot wretch! 7 am get me my my coffee cunt!

[mortallycoiled]

does bang like dice

bang is the type to get into like 12 hour arguments on how most dice aren't perfectly random due to imperfections and extremely minor weight differences on each side due to the markings/divots used for numbering the sides. ive also been thinking about like... maybe bang could have a full set of magically weighted dice. they're only weighted when rolled with intention (so if they just get dropped or something, or even if its like testing to see if theyre weighted, theyll just be normal dice. but when ACTUALLY rolling for something theyll always have the same number come up). the dice are all weighted on different sides but are visually and physically identical. so like instead of the number on a single dice being the unknown factor, its just. which weighted dice did you pick from the weighted dice bag?