#they're so fucking funny

[ex0tic-butters]

rewatching the sims season 2 and absolutely dying over dan quite literally clutching his pearls

man was FLABBERGASTED

[autisticcassandracain]

I’ve only read NTT Deathstroke so Do Not @ Me if I’m wrong, but I think the funniest part of Slade Wilson’s whole entire Deal isn’t the fact that he’s fistfighting actual teenagers and getting his ass kicked, or that he’s an epic divorce man whose wife shot his eye out; it’s that I’m pretty sure he’s not actually divorced. Like are you telling me he and Adeline calmed down long enough to sit down and sign the papers, divide the property, and present their case to the court? Absolutely not. These two are legally still married, they’re just divorced in every way that matters. And, crucially, Adeline took everything that Deathstroke didn’t have in that suitcase when he ran out of the house bleeding from his eye, because what’s he gonna do? Come back and go ‘hey, I know you tried to kill me for being willing to sacrifice our son for my abstract sense of honor, but I’m the one who bought that couch’? She’d shoot him again. As she should. And he knows it.

Deathstroke, epic divorce man whose wife took the house and kids and also his back-up toothbrushes probably, and who is still, legally, married to her.

[vangbelsing]

This is just what the Rook and Solas dynamic is to me tbh

[sga-owns-my-soul]

that's basically the first three seasons tbh

[looloolands]

The only entertaining thing about Hazbin Hotel so far is whatever divorce these two are going through that they are making everyone else's problem.

[captainkirkk]

Patient's distressed mother: I don't think I want to impulsively give my dying son medicine that has a good chance of killing him much faster- House: WOOOOW your only child is going to DIE and it's going to be your fault for not making this split second decision right now, you fucking MORON

[hellishfig]

the riz and sklonda conversation is simultaneously killing me emotionally and making me cry with laughter

especially the reactions from emily and ally to the comments on their characters

[thatlittledandere]

I adore their dynamic.

[a-dumb-sarcastic-bisexual]

Nimona headcanons plus little bonus part 2 electric boogaloo

After Nimona found out about Ambrosius' allergies they demanded to test every single meal he eats 

They’ll take the plate away from him and have a test bite and only after they deem it “safe” will they let him eat it

Doesn’t matter if they're out eating or at home she does this every time 

He can literally say “Nim Bal made this for me it’s not gonna have anything I’m allergic to” and she’ll respond with “You don’t know that he could finally be sick of you and the only thing saving you is me” 

Ambrosius and Bal will share literally everything they eat 

Whenever they go out they’ll usually order something they know they’ll both like 

And if they know the other one is between two options they’ll just order one of the options and share both meals 

It’s a pretty normal thing that they’ve been doing since they were kids so they don’t even question it anymore 

Nimona jokingly calls it sickening as she steals food off their plates 

No one in the trio is neurotypical 

Bal is autistic Ambrosius has ADHD Nimona is a mix of both

Talking to these dorks is absolute hell

It’s kind of like the interrogation scene except it’s not one topic 

They often get sidetracked and lose the plot of the conversation 

They’ll have 10 different conversations at once and only finish like 5

Bal forgets a whole bunch of shit because he has long-term brain damage and Nimona and Ambrosius forget shit cause of the ADHD 

It’s not uncommon for someone to say “Hey remind me to” and then they’ll be cut off by the other person who just says “You know I won’t remember that just put a reminder in your phone” 

Their house is covered to the brim in sticky notes and random pieces of paper for reminders 

The grocery list is on the front door the chore list is in the kitchen and random little tasks are scattered around the house 

When Nimona doesn’t want to do something he’ll just erase his name from that task

He fooled the boys for a while but Bal started keeping score of who did what and when and called his sneaky ass out 

Little bonus part 2 electric boogaloo: this time it’s my sister and my mama and my sister also was acting like I was killing her firstborn not asking her to watch a movie 

Me: “look mama it’s the siblings” my sister: “but they’re gay” me: “yeah but people thought they were siblings” my sister: “if you ever look at me like that I’m calling the cops” (the scene on the catwalk) 

“Yeah you better cheer” (when Bal was getting knighted)

“I knew something was wrong with the sword” “So did Bal” “Yeah but I knew first”

Apparently both my Mama and my sister didn’t know that Ambrosius cut off Bal’s arm so I got to see both of their reactions 

This was my Mama’s “damn what happened to being a lover not a fighter” “he’s a knight Mama” “Who cares!!” 

This was my sister's “Wow really took the whole arm huh?” “That’s how they were trained” “And?” 

My mama was talking to my sister when Nimona met Bal “Who does that remind you of?” “Roo” “Exactly”

 “Oh look it’s tiny dick!” (Talking about Todd) 

“What a fucking bitch” (when she found out the director swapped the sword) 

This was when Bal and Ambrosius were fighting Me: “Is there anything gayer than having an argument in the middle of a sword fight” My mama: “They’ll fight with their other swords later” 

“Who fucking asked” “bla bla bla I’m a racist bitch” (when the Director went on her monologue in the office)

She saw Ambrosius’ username and laughed for like two minutes straight

After the sword fight my sister would pretend like Bal and Ambrosius were making out every time they were on screen together 

“Because I love you *making out noises*” at the tavern 

“Oh there’s their third wheel (Todd)” “Nah he’s racist as fuck” “Who isn’t in the institute?”

When Ambrosius tried to stop the director she said this is what he meant “No you can’t set off the laser that’s my kid!” (She believes the trio is a family too) 

“Awe they’re hugging *more making out noises*” 

She called it cute in the end and I made fun of her for bitching about it

I asked my sister who her favorite is and she says “what’s his name balls?” I started cackling my ass off and she goes “I’m joking I know his name is Ballister and he’s still my favorite”

[neobastard]

one of the funniest things TNT has done lately was make a gift box mystery capsule based on the tidal wave of electric moehogs that has hit the pound due to how cheap and readily available the morphing potions for them are

like you'd think "why would they make a moehog themed GBC" and then you go pound surfing for a while and go "ah that's why"

[plumadot]

pillager trio ily so much

[live-laugh-love-aziraphale]

Sansûkh re-read and I think we as a society don't talk about the best friendship ever written... Laerophen and Gimizh

[joy-girl]

How this conversation feels like

Kabuto: "if I don't store dead bodies with different age range in chronological order I get... anxious"

Orochimaru: "you must be a Virgo... right Kabuto?"

Kabuto: "Pisces actually."

[royboyfanpage]

DCs best duo

[ursifors]

jeremy was in minecraft smp for an hour and has started a bald guy commune with junk and greg

[its-hitsugaya-himself]

tianshan having a cute date while zhanyi is sinking sounds about right