#they're fucked guys that's the whole point of this

[waddles-ex-machina]

btw I truly love how the merman episode is the only time that Hilda finds a weird creature and just fucking hates him. just does not sympathise with or try to help him at all. usually there's a point in these where she realises she did something wrong or decides the lil guy has a good reason for what they're doing but no. like all through this show I thought we were watching Hilda befriend creatures bc she’s so innately empathetic and forgiving and will go to any lengths to do right by her weird lil critter friends but actually the whole time it’s been this

[catbountry]

Re: your reblog: No idea why a lot of men don't want anything to do with a movement that was regularly comparing them to bowls of poisoned M&Ms. It'll forever be a mystery

Oh fuck, that fucking post.

Like, look. I understand the importance of communicating why women might be intimidated by men. But that was such a bad comparison. I remember it being circulated by the kinds of people I was hanging out with who would wind up becoming increasingly right-wing, and it felt like every single time there was some sort of poorly articulated point about the fear that gets ingrained into us, it would just push these guys further and further away. This is purely anecdotal, but I was in a discussion with some guys in a server who said that they'd talked with multiple guys who were just kind of vaguely anti-woke not because of any deeply held principles, but because someone on the left was mean to them or disparaged them. In nerd spaces especially, these are guys who were likely already ostracized in school for being weird and are looking for, well, a safe space. And when perceived outsiders (other nerds who are demographically different from them) come in and try and make a space more inclusive, make it safer, and call anybody who objects a bad person... there's a really big social element to that. Like yeah, there's probably misogyny or racism or homophobia that could be unpacked, but those are things you can unlearn. And the best way for these guys to unlearn these behaviors is just through contact with people who are different from them with whom they have positive experiences. It's not the whole process, mind, but it's a good first step. And simply telling someone off for being bad when they might not even fully understand why it is that they have objections will succeed in getting rid of those guys from your spaces, but where do they go from there? Not the diverse and inclusive spaces we would hope they'd go, that's for fuckin' sure.

I don't want to say that it's our jobs to be super nice to these guys all the time, because you know what? Yeah, some of them do suck, as many people of all walks of life do. They won't change their minds because they see no reason to do so. But if you have the energy to try and level with these guys and just say things in a way that isn't accusatory and is just matter-of-fact, it works better. They're more likely to see you as a whole-ass person if you're willing to engage with them as a whole-ass person. It's exhausting, and I'm not the best at it, but goddammit, I've tried, with varying results. Even if they come in swinging, they can be tripped up by a simple "why would you say that?" or "I don't get it." Challenging them in a way that's not accusatory so much as it is asking them to self-reflect. Why would you say that? Why is that offensive joke funny? Why do you think it's an appropriate thing to say to people you barely even know?

I'm not one of those people that denies the existence of the male loneliness epidemic, though I certainly do think loneliness is up with everybody, not just men. I think neuroatypical men are particularly vulnerable; people with autism aren't any more likely than NT people to believe conspiracy theories, but I definitely found myself taking the word of people who I was friendly with when they perpetuated misinformation to me about shit like AGP or ROGD because why would they lie to me? Looking back, there were definitely people who were racist in a more lowkey way that wasn't immediately detectable by me because I couldn't hear the dogwhistles. But just by virtue of being a enby in predominately queer social circles, I have people around me that were able to challenge these views and help pull me away from these ideas (and help me realize that my gender is more "woman?" rather than just "woman"). These friends allowed me to realize just how stupid they actually were. There's a lot of guys, particular straight guys, who just do not have that in their lives. The bigots are always recruiting and there's nothing they love more than disenfranchised young men who are full of misdirected anger and resentment, especially ones who might be psychologically or emotionally vulnerable and incredibly insecure about it. It's a really hard mindset to get out of, particularly when your views get more extreme, and it's also something you have to actually want to change. Admitting you've been played for a sucker by people with agendas and who don't actually give a shit about you is hard. Nobody wants to admit when they've been had.

There's always a lot of resistance whenever anybody floats the idea that hey, maybe we shouldn't automatically assume these guys are assholes when we encounter them; they might just be ignorant, and you can talk to people who are ignorant without coming across as condescending or sanctimonious. Some of them might be assholes but let them show themselves first before deciding that you can't deal with them. But men are like most people; they don't want to see themselves as fundamentally bad or wicked. Nor should they. I know a lot of women who have been hurt by men; shit, I was hurt by the same man over and over and over again and was in denial about it for decades, and it was only after leaving him that I realized just how absolutely fucked he was as a person, and how he'd never have any incentive to change, even when faced with the consequences of his incredibly selfish actions. I tried so fucking hard to get him to improve only to be met with the same rote excuses for why he couldn't, and I kept giving him grace he did not earn. But also I was trying for 21 years. But his problems are his own. Not every man is going to be like him. I've known men who are, deep down, decent people, but they pick up shitty ideas that linger around them like a stinkcloud. The good news about stinkclouds, though? You can take a shower and smell better. You do it regularly enough, you won't stink no more. It's not an immutable trait. But it definitely helps to not hang around other guys who cluster and form a larger stinkcloud. You gotta wash your ass, if you must, as Del the Funky Homosapien once said.

Fellas, you are not a poisoned bowl of M&Ms. You might just be kinda smelly and in need of a bath. You can't remove the poison from those M&Ms, but you can clean up and become the best version of yourself. A lot of us have the stink of a lot of cultural ideas we've been fed without question, and you're not a bad person for having thought these things one time; it's a long process trying to challenge and prune these ideas. But you might be a bad person if somebody tries to reach out to you and you go and roll around in pig shit and declare how much you love being stinky, while also being upset that girls don't want to talk to you on account of the stink... unless they are taught from a young age to ignore it, or they also want to just socially isolate themselves by diving headfirst into the Bog of Eternal Stench. Those women do certainly exist, but they're not going to bring out the best in you, you know?

It's not an easy process, and it's not easy to reach out to people and have the psychological wherewithal to be able to handle some potentially wild shit. But if you're the kind of person who believes in rehabilitation in the justice system, then you should be able to extend that to people who just have some really shitty ideas that they just internalized without question who might just need to hear a perspective that they haven't heard before. Not everybody can do it, but for those who can? Try. You might help keep somebody from quoting crime or suicide statistics to strangers online in an attempt to feel some semblance of power above those they see below them in the societal hierarchy. You can't force change, but you might be able to nudge them in the right direction.

I think that's the best anybody can do. Try to be as kind as patient as you can, but don't take any shit, either. Remain firm in your principles. Remove yourself if you have to. But at least try, even when it's hard, because like it or not, we need as many of these guys on our side as possible of we want to affect the kind of change we want to see in the world.

... And that's all I have to say about that.

[damnyoureyes-weasley]

This. Is. Cinema.

On the surface it's 2 guys a girl and a whole lotta horny tennis.

However, every single shot is curated to perfection.

It seems the movie is centered around this one match in New Rochelle and how our characters got to this point.

Over the course of 13 years we see failure, flirtation, lust, jealousy, trickery, obsession, pining and an intense rivalry. This all culminates into 2 ¼ hours of tension, techno and tennis.

The soundtrack adds a hyperventilative (which I'm aware isn't a word but should be 💀) layer to scenes that would not normally do so. A simple scene at a table turns into a 'holding your breath. Will they won't they' moment with the loud aggresive techo playing over the simple conversation.

All the tennis games are tense but the main one had me on the edge of my seat each time we came back to it. Also it's obvious but I appreciated the nod to the main tennis match being a representation of their tumultuous history.

Each of the three main characters feel so human that you can't just say "well they're the villain of this story and the reason all these bad things happened" bc they all fuck up and none of them are definitively villians or victims.

I noticed immediately that Patrick towers and invades people's spaces consistently throughout the 13 years. He's childish, immature, cheeky, stubborn, condescending and arrogant. There's also a vulnerability there. I think he's genuinely in love with Art ig only at first and 'who wouldn't be'

Art is sly, cunning, very insecure and softer as a person. Whether he was always like this or Patrick's intimidating, towering nature backed him into a corner slightly we'll never know but from the moment we meet them he's always second. Second to speak with Tashi, to sit on the bed. He gets shouted over a lot by Patrick but I think that makes us feel sorry for Art which allows his trickery to pass under our nose and us to underestimate him.

Tashi is obsessive, controlling, demanding and stubborn but also sweet and shows concern. I, however, think she never loved either of them, we knew this with Patrick but I think she lived vicariously through Arts career and cared for Art but never deeply loved him. Tashi and Patrick would not work in any universe because they're both too stubborn and they're both leaders, we see the fault of this pairing in the dorm before Tashi's match.

I won't pretend to be some film snob who only looks at the nuances and won't shamelessly say that this film was hot beacuse it was, incredibly so. The churros for Christ's sakes.

This film exceeded my already high expectations and I will say somethings potentially fishy about Lilys parentage just saying 🫢

To round this review off, I quote my favourite review, I've read "The tennis is about sex and the sex is about tennis"

[boomstab-papa]

This is why feminism is for men, too. Why men are not just "allowed" to be feminists, they NEED to be.

When Rando Joe has been told by patriarchy his whole life that he's entitled to be the center of attention whenever he wants, then he wanders into leftist spaces and someone tells him "hey, don't talk over other people when they're talking, especially about their own experiences", Joe is not likely to believe women telling him "we are not 'silencing you', you just need to chill a bit". His feelings have been hurt! He had something to say!! He's probably not going to listen to that explanation. But he might believe a man explaining that to him.

When Rando Joe sees someone expressing frustration at people who look like him - white, men, able-bodied, what have you - and starts thinking "wait why does everyone hate me for my immutable traits", Joe is not likely to believe women telling him "we do not 'hate you' personally, but also, you have to accept that some people will have a harder time trusting you because of their past experiences with people who look like you and you can't take that personally". His feelings have been hurt! They shouldn't be mean to him like that!! He's probably not going to listen to that explanation. But he might believe a man explaining that to him.

Because misogyny is so prevalent that studies show that generally, men simply do not want to listen to women, be corrected by a woman, or follow a woman's directions. Unless any given man has done a LOT of work to examine this and try to deprogram this attitude, odds are it's going to control a lot of what he thinks, and this work will never "end". That's just how unpacking privilege and bigotry works. https://journals.sagepub.com/doi/abs/10.1177/2051570719828687 https://www.bbc.co.uk/voices/yourvoice/classroom_talk.shtml https://web.stanford.edu/~eckert/PDF/ZimmermanWest.pdf https://heinonline.org/HOL/LandingPage?handle=hein.journals/valr103&div=39&id=&page= https://www.jstor.org/stable/3346669

Meanwhile studies show that feminists do not "hate men". The idea that they do comes from... wait for it... misogynists. I grew up in a Rush Limbaugh-listening household and wow did that guy love telling us how "feminazis hate men". Another comment on this post linked this very poignant article so thank you genuinemusic for sharing it: https://www.forbes.com/sites/kimelsesser/2023/11/27/feminists-dont-hate-men-according-to-new-research/

So. Maybe the above comment thinks that women and leftists are always telling him "we hate men" because he still hasn't deprogrammed that part of his alt-right pipeline experience yet. Maybe he thinks that women and leftists pointing out his "immutable traits" (man, white, etc.) - and the privilege it affords him - is an attack and an insult. Maybe he thinks that being told "hey you need to chill before you talk over XYZ on XYZ" hurts his feelings and it feels like an attack and an insult. Maybe he's had a different experience I haven't described here. I'm not a mind-reader, I just read a lot.

Yes, leftists cannot be out here hating masculinity or hating men. I'm not going to pretend that I've never seen anyone behaving like this but most people do not do that. Also it can't be on women to lead this charge and never ever hurt men's feelings "or else I'll become a misogynist", as the previous comment says. If you're gonna be unpacking your bigotry, it's going to fucking hurt. But it will be much more than just this discomfort. It's much better for you than getting alt-right brainwashed.

Statistically, we need way more men talking men through this.

I couldn't have said it better myself.

[shaunashipman]

I know we're all upset right now, but just to correct the record Oliver did say nice things about Tommy and Buck's relationship in these interviews. He confirmed that the relationship would always be meaningful to Buck and that Tommy was just scared and that's why they broke up.

I do think Oliver is in a weird position of knowing the relationship wasn't going to last. Tim confirmed it was all his idea to have then break up. And at this point Oliver knows no Buck relationship is for the long haul.

Oliver was biphobic, but I didn't think he knows or is sensitive as to why. And I think he should have done more to stand up for Lou. But I think his perspective is very different from ours (and Lou's) because he knew it was always going to end one way or another.

Idk I just think we can be critical of him and his actions while still understanding that at the end of the day he's just a dude doing a job the best he can.

he knew his co-star in the storyline was being sent death threats for months and said nothing, did nothing. the same as he did when megan and annelise were being attacked. he said he knew the actresses playing his LI's had been attacked but didn't know "if it was deserved" as if being hired for a job makes you deserving of being attacked. not only did he not speak up in defence of lou or any of them, but he continues to play ball with the very ppl who are doing the attacking, bolstering their confidence that what they're doing is show approved.

of course he said nice things about bucktommy, the relationship ending was the story of the ep and it didn't end in a way that made the whole relationship bad—just tommy.

did he say anything nice about lou? did he acknowledge that despite him apparently knowing the relationship wasn't gonna last, lou was completely blindsided?

yes oliver was biphobic. of course he didn't mean to be biphobic. so many ppl don't mean to be racist, or sexist, ableist. that doesn't absolve them of anything. and if he actually cared about doing the bisexual storyline justice, he would have done the bare minimum research to know what he said was extremely biphobic. and his half-assed "i'm sorry you were offended" apology doesn't really ring true when buck has broken up with 4 women over the course of the series and not once did oliver suggest he should sleep around to deal with it. but now suddenly that he's bisexual, he should, as were oliver's exact words "go guy, guy, girl, girl, guy, guy". like that is the most basic bisexual stereotype, if he didn't realize that was biphobic, what the fuck business does he have playing a bisexual character?

he's not doing the job the best he can. if he was, he would have some modicum of care for buck's journey, which is like the most basic thing to ask of an actor playing a long-term role. and was it all tim's idea to have them break up? or did oliver's texts asking to have buck fuck around have anything to do with it? we'll never know cause oliver's a coward who is going to stay silent until this blows over and then only interact with the ppl who don't care to know the answers to any of this, cause they got what they wanted.

[sergle]

I love to hear what people say about Youtube Drama* but it's SO tacky when it gets so offbase that the posts people make start to be about completely off topic infighting within the Watcher fanbase

[rolandkaros]

forever hilarious to me that tennis is promoted as this prestigious highbrow big-brain sport when most tennis fans these days are like. yeah this is my favorite player. yeah i don't know why they're like that. yes they are stupid. no i will not choose somebody else.

[tanuki1029]

Even to someone who thinks they're a centrists, terfs are a right-wing movement. They aren't feminists in any actual capacity. They don't care about women's rights. They are openly willing to work with fascists because they are fascists only interested in the extermination of trans people. Describing them as left wing isn't remotely true. It's doing the work of their propaganda for them. They aren't feminists.

I know what you mean by it seeming like people categorically just hate men in general. It's kind of a two pronged issue that you're describing, but both of them definitely do happen.

First, with the women and nb spaces, they do suck. Majorly, but it's not flat hatred of men. I've been refused entrance into those spaces and definitely don't feel safe in them. The ones I've encountered are basically terf-lite. They don't trust me because I'm trans, and thus don't qualify as a woman in their eyes.

It sucks. It sucks in a way that is just incredibly painful. Calling it man hatred or misandry is missing the wider picture, though.

The kinds of people who trust a trans masc until they look masculine don't just distrust men, either. It's a similar issue of not seeing the wider picture. They trust a trans guy at first because they still see them as a girl, just one that wants to be called a guy. They're transphobic as well, and that's what paints the picture of this irrational hatred of men. They don't treat cis men this way. They are specifically cruel to trans men because of their transphobia.

For the second part, yeah, men get treated way differently as a class. Women are especially closed off around them. If that was the whole of the situation, then yeah, it'd be accurate to point at it ass the problem.

It's not, though. Women are careful around men because we have to be. Society as a whole is constantly conditioned to trust men (particularly white, able bodied, etc) over women. The reason that men get treated with suspicion by default is because they have the power to ruin a woman's life and will never face any consequences for it at best, or be rewarded for putting a bitch in her place at worst.

Especially with abortion being so attacked, there are legal fucking consequences to trusting a man now. That's true of anyone who can get pregnant, too. I've heard some heart wrenching horror stories of cis dudes trying to get trans mascs pregnant to force them into "being a woman." Like, trusting the wrong dude can literally kill you.

And it's ass. It really sucks to have to treat dudes like this, but you really can't blame this on non men or the left. I've seen this same conversation around bipoc creating nonwhite spaces. It was genuinely hurtful to me at first, but like. When I actually stopped to look at the entire situation, it was really easy to see why. White people are an actual, tangible risk to bipoc in a way that they need protection from.

The solution isn't to get rid of nonwhite spaces. The solution has to be dismantling the power structures that enable this oppression.

And it still hurts!!! Genuinely, it sucks to be on the other side of this! I've been there. I know that pain is real, but it wouldn't have helped those nonwhite spaces to waste their time telling white woman four thousand eight hundred and six the basics of racism. They had their own shit to work through.

Falling into this idea of the left hates men is falling into the same trap that I did back then. It's taking the pain of an oppressive class at face value. You just can't stop there. You have to look deeper than the pain.

It hurts, but when you see what powers are at play, you can work towards meaningful change.

the amount of redditors like "as someone who escaped the alt right pipeline, here's the problem with the left" *writes out essay revealing a massive victim complex*...you did NOT escape the right i'm afraid 😭🙏 at the core of reactionary politics is aggrieved entitlement!

[lupins-hehim-pussy]

I wanna know ur Fontaine msq criticisms 👁️👁️👂I’m all ears

I'm not sure if you wanted me to talk about this secretly or publicly but! Here I go!

The TLDR: Fontaine MSQ aestheticised prison, poverty, child abuse, the justice system/court and didn't properly address any of it.

More:

Focalors/Furina has way too much of a sympathetic angle for a dictator who's lets people drown with her inaction.

Neuvillette feels Bad for sentencing some people to death/prison, but that's it. He's one of the most powerful people in Fontaine. If he felt like there are systemic injustices, I.E sending an abused Child to prison, he should be the first person to DO something about it, not just cry and be sad so the audience can be like aw, that's complex character writing isn't it? No it's not! And guilt doesn't absolve you!!!!!!! (These are stuff we deal with in OTCOJ read my fic now /j)

Meropide has children in it, both Sentenced there (Wriothesley) and BORN THERE (Lanoire), and this is just a quirk of the place. Not only that, Meropide accepts prisoners of all genders and crimes. There are abusers and abuse victims in one place. Do you know how bad that is? How much potential for crimes to happen in a place like that— oh wait, Meropide isn't under Fontaine's jurisdiction. If you are assaulted as an inmate it literally means nothing to the court.

Wriothesley had no qualifications when he took over. Depending on how long he lived on the streets, how old he was when he killed his parents, how old he was when he was first taken in by the orphanage, etc, the man might never have more than 4–5 years of formal education. Sigewinne probably had to teach him how to write reports. And do Meropide's spreadsheets. Edit because I forgot to elaborate on this one: This isn't a point brought up anywhere, which is bad, because when poverty and incarceration robs you of a proper education (and the rights to vote in many places too, too, by the way), it reduces your prospects for jobs, reduces many people's ability to get a home etc etc. Wriothesley was just, narratively, Given his position.

Meropide is an industrialized prison, and they portray this as a good thing. Prisoners are paid in coupons for their labour, and this is also portrayed as a good thing.

The One-Meal-A-Day reform was something Paimon gushed about being so great of a perk, that people might want to go to jail for food (could be interesting and reflective of systemic poverty if MHY had brains, but they don't, so I was just Pissed because essentially all Paimon wanted to say was "Prison isn't so bad, but still don't go to prison guys! Prison labour is really hard!"). By the way, in most real-world prisons they are obligated to feed you three meals a day. Because that's how much food a human needs. MHY went with one meal just so they can say "if you want to eat more, you have to work." And then the welfare meal is a goddamn gacha. So imagine you're a starving child who's too weak to work in the fucking robot assembly line, and you wander up for your first meal in 24 hours, only to luck in with a shit one. I'd kill myself.

They wrote Wriothesley, who's a victim of the system, into a guy who's say shit like "I'm the Duke I can do whatever I want" for a cool moment where he choke-slams an inmate (I know he was a bad guy. But also, in copaganda when cops are violent/disregarding protocols, they are always only portrayed to do that against bad guys, so what does our critical thinking tells us about this one?) They wrote Wriothesley, who was an inmate of a prison so bad, so notorious that it is the literal boogeyman of Fontaine, that has a legal (???) fighting pit, with an administrator who abuses his position to be unreasonable, to willingly stay in the place and become an Administrator who would choke-slam an inmate while saying a cool line about how he has the power to do whatever he wants. They wrote him, the guy who had to be fed on the streets by melusines, to think one-meal-a-day was a good enough reform (while he spends god-knows how much on his boat). This wasn't a victim-turns-into-abuser narrative either, they want all this to be seen as positive character growth.

And then, the final kicker is, they gloss over his entire abuse. You can only read about these shit in his profile, which most people don't because they don't Have Him or doesn't care to unlock it/read it online, and they jammed his entire backstory into a flaccid info-dump at the end of his character story quest. This man isn't Allowed to feel abused and neglected and show any reaction to it within the narrative of Fontaine itself, because if they actually Gave Weight to what happened to him, they'd have to confront THE FUCKING JUSTICE SYSTEM they had NO PLANS on criticising. I don't think they ever explicitly said the fucking Crime-Theatre nonsense was Bad either.

I could go on, but this is already so long. But yeah, I hope this gave you an idea.

[herd-reject-arts]

Pulled from videos I put on my Instagram, but they're better together.

Went to clean my car and found I had a stowaway. Little dude was hiding under my passenger seat and would have almost certainly gotten vacuumed up if it had not come out swinging (I think. I don't know mantid behavior too well, but it was jabbing with its foremost legs, so that seems like an attack to me).

I was able to get the mantis onto a Gatorade bottle and out of my way while I cleaned. I was hoping it would leave in the meantime so I didn't have to deal with a tiny animal who was probably just as confused as I was on how it got there. But nope! Dude stuck around and listened to the honky tonk music the car wash was playing, or at least it seemed to be listening based on how it was swaying (note: I'm joking. I'm pretty sure it didn't care about the music. I just kept making comments to it about dancing to the tunes).

In the end, it hopped off the bottle (only after I moved it to the trash can, though I wasn't going to throw it away if it hadn't jumped off) and I got a really cool video of a praying mantis jumping.

And the frame-by-frame of that jump, because why not.

[drinkingdeadpeopletea]

and shout-out to weepe's guards! competent enough to move quicker than kozma's people, strong enough to overpower them despite being outnumbered, and seemingly didn't even blink at not just killing other people but at doing it with horrific weaponized tearror-blood. weepe found these guys in the fucking TRUST?

[rosethourn]

Let's try using reading comprehension skills over "gotcha" tactics, ok? And then maybe you'll see why what you said is a blatant misinterpretation of what I said. I know it might be tough, but being a part of the "how dare you say we piss on the poor" population of this website isn't a cute look. You got this!

Anyways! For the rest of y'all! I know people are scared, and when we're scared we want simple, swift solutions. But we have to be vigilant not to fall back on reactionary thinking. The 4B movement reduces the idea of the patriarchy to men vs women, and not a systemic issue that anyone can uphold and fall victim to, regardless of gender. And because of that, they have very strict rules on What Is A Woman and What Is Not. News flash, it's the same transphobia and TERF rhetoric we've been fighting so hard in the states.

There can't be a trans-inclusive version of this movement because to do so, you need hard lines on who's a man and who's a woman. If we're excluding men, that means trans men will either get gendered correctly and marked as the enemy, be misgendered in order to be included, or the language shifts to people with uterus' versus people with penises, which is just extra steps to disguising transphobia/bioessentialism/transmedicalism. And trans women will continue not to be taken seriously and labeled as a threat despite how vulnerable that group already is. There is no safety here. (Note: Going forward I'll be using "men" and "women" moreso in the context the people in the 4B movement do, but again, this goes beyond sex/gender)

You also have to think about what happens next. The, "Then What?". What changes will it bring, how will it end the patriarchy? So you're not interacting with men anymore - To what end? This is a huge problem with certain activist movements, especially in the US, and especially with white people. You have to think it through. What happens to society if you exclude 50% of a population, indiscriminately, over something they have no control over? Probably not good! No not probably, definitely not good! That sounds like the nightmare y'all are trying to avoid! But as an individual, it's easy for these people to say, "too bad! They deserve to suffer!" But that is not a community mindset. Like it or not, we share a planet with men! And if you actually are trying to break free of the punitive system of justice, if you actually want to work towards restorative justice and leave behind the Incarceration State of Mind, then you need to take a step out of your individual point of view and do what's best for the community as a whole. Look out for one another, support the women in your community for sure, that's great! Call out people, yes I said people not just men, for upholding patriotic standards. And this goes for other men too! If you have a shitty misogynist guy friend, they're gonna listen to you before they listen to a woman say the same thing. Sucks to hear, but it's unrealistic to think change is gonna happen overnight, and it definitely isn't gonna happen if he already doesn't respect the people yelling at him about how he's wrong. He has to know he's wrong first. It also means calling out your friends who are dating/married to Republicans/misogynists/racists/homo/transphobs. There's nuance to everything obviously and there's no one right answer on how to approach this, but let your friends know it's fucked up to be with someone who doesn't respect their human rights. Help them out if it's an abusive situation, but if they're just giving them a pass, let them know that shit's disgusting, call them out on hypocrisy, make them actually consider what it means to be with someone like that. Keep each other accountable. It's not your job to fix every fuck ass dude who comes along TO AN EXTENT. And maybe on a personal level, it's not something you're good at/have the capacity for. And that's ok, but as a whole, we can't just give up on men and let them fend for themselves, because someone will find them and radicalize them against women further. That's what's already happening, we can't afford to make it worse!

And I know more blogs like the one above are gonna hit me with different strawmen arguments or take what I say out of context or just completely misrepresent what I've said, so I'll say this. There's nothing wrong with being choosy about who you date/sleep with/marry/have kids with. Be choosy about who you're friends with! In most cases I think it's best to be. But if you think you're gonna avoid toxic relationships, abuse, misogyny, etc by changing your only metric to Women™️, you're gonna fail. Personal choice is one thing, activism is another.

Sorry if this is rambling, but I'm scared, I'm depressed, and I'm pissed off. It hurts to see people I know care about queer people and community building forget the dog whistles and fall into cultish radical groups. Cults and other radical groups wait for a victimized population to be vulnerable and swoop in with a solution dressed up with all the right words to make it seem like it's a good thing for you when it just isn't. Stay safe, stay smart, stay alert. Not all that glitters is gold yada yada yada 🫰🏻

and American women i am being SO serious when i say we need to learn from our South Korean sisters and follow their steps with the 4B movement. the house of representatives, the senate, the supreme court, and the president are ALL red now. if american men want to control our bodies and choices so much then let’s give them HELL!

read about the 4B movement:

[who-is-page]

Life is hard! Consider buying my stuff!

My life isn't quite falling apart, but things have gotten really tricky lately. One housemate (and their super destructive, permanent houseguest) is refusing to pay their share of rent or utilities for the next three months, and another is refusing to pay their full share of rent for that same amount of time and is making us cover around $75 every month, and I'm having to double-up my hours at work while still being a full-time student (and also one of my professors, who we're 99% sure is using ChatGPT to generate her citations because none of them exist and we pointed this out, hates my guts and has been grading me really harshly and forcing me to go full-sail on every assignment to ridiculous degrees in order to pass this required class).

My spouse is working on getting full-time at their job, but it looks like they won't be able to until December, and we also have no idea how much rent is going to increase this year-- my guess is it's going to go up another $500, same as last year, to a total of $3,000, so things are gonna get really fucking bumpy until around January, probably.

So basically, if you like the work I've done, consider throwing me a tip on Ko-Fi or buying my stuff on Itch.io:

(Also I promise we have more stuff lined up that we want to polish and publish, life has just been super-duper fucking busy! There is so much more going on right now than what I've mentioned here, especially in terms of surprise medical bills and other horrible surprises. And we haven't forgotten about Inky Paws issue 2, either, which we're still hoping to have done by December and which will STILL always be entirely 100% free to download, no matter what our living or money situation looks like. That will never ever change, so please don't worry!)

[waywardsalt]

with my phantom hourglass replay, there are two things i noticed;

a possible theme you could glean from the game is action vs inaction, and i think it's especially prevalent before you even leave mercay the first time, with oshus frequently urging link to not go after the ghost ship, then to just wait until the broken bridge is fixed, and seems reluctant at every turn while link and ciela are more than eager to go and do something about this problem, and the people of mercay in general talking about things and their problems but never seeming to act on their fears or desires, as well as the mention that due to the ghost ship, very very few people are still sailing around, while linebeck is one of the only people we see in the game actively going after the ghost ship and still sailing around. i might make a longer post just talking more about the action vs inaction in phantom hourglass but i just noticed it a bit and thought it was a bit of an interesting sort of theme you could find in the game.

linebeck moves so fucking much. i think he moves more than any npc in the rest of the game. not just in his intro cutscene where he is very animated, just in how much he moves when just standing in his little idle post, it's damn near distracting when the camera is focused on him, he moves a lot. i don't think i've really acknowledged how much he moves, and it really gives the impression that he's antsy or eager to get going, both of which fit him pretty well with how he acts.

[dimensionhoppr]

One day I will be able to properly break down the themes of authoritarianism, bioessentialism, and the VERY flawed "hero and villain" dynamic in MHA and then it'll be ALL over for you...

[secondhand-lions]

looks @ u like this

using this as an excuse to talk about sirenity because they're easily one of my Guys Of All Time and iiiiii don't get to talk about them a whole lot

- is an excellent musician (virtuoso! but primarily anything with strings!) and artist! he also has synaesthesia (which, like their dyslexia, was less severe before The Benny Incident) and perfect pitch and they're an uncannily good mimic.

- fully knows and understands RobCo Termlink code and can, therefore, talk with the vast majority of robots/androids/computers in the wasteland

- there is not nearly enough time to go into their sex life. they've been around. very casual about sex and relationships to the point where it circles back around to become an intense soul-rending need for People and Connection and then it circles back around AGAIN to being very casual. two things can be true at once

- met and talked with benny -> "well. goddamn that's a lot to think about" -> met with House -> "even more to think about. shit." -> Courier Walking Instinct kicks in -> muscle memory takes them back to Primm -> Johnson Nash knows enough about them to recognize the Walk To Think state they're in, accepts that this is a short meeting -> Sirenity keeps going, still on muscle memory to the entrance to the Divide -> thats the thing that snaps them out of their sorta half-dissociative state -> "fuck i'm hungry" -> back to Primm for Ruby's casserole -> turns around, sees the ruined drive-in -> "y'know what? yeah. a movie sounds good right now." -> OWB (during which their mental state is surprisingly good! a creeping dread of familiarity at the sight of the painted old world flags and the descriptions of the other visitors, but yknow! that's fine! then they have a breakdown upon hearing Ulysses' voice again.)

- indeterminate amount of time and gameplay -> Dead Money -> stick around in the mojave for a bit before finally relenting and admitting that they have to back out and recover from the Cloud for a bit ("i have to go clear my lungs") -> Honest Hearts

- casual friendly situationship/QPR with Arcade, kinda a cool older cousin/sister figure to Veronica, good friends with Cass and Raul, visits Lily as much as they can. i'm not really sure of where they stand with Boone. they very badly want to tell him "i think you can be proud of the work you put into something without being proud of what the thing was or did or became" but like... Boone wants an ending, a neat little all-loose-ends-are-tied finish, and Sirenity is living proof that that sort of thing doesn't just Happen. they never were good at delivering endings, anyway.

- post-game otp is sirenity/ulysses but it's open because they both know that they can't always provide what the other needs/wants and love is more of a verb than a feeling anyway

- good friends with the Khans, Followers, and Kings!

- was genuinely really hoping that Benny would stick around after their conversation. not even mad about getting shot or jumped by his bodyguards.

- uhhhhmmmm OH YEAH Mobius was. such a refreshing presence for them. even if they do have to stand weird to keep eachother out of their blindspots. "crazy fuckers missing an eye who experience more visual inputs than should be there" solidarity. she helps with his messed up sensors :]

- honestly i think Sirenity's VERY very postgame jaunt to the Commonwealth is. just straight up in their canon now.

- scars from the Big Mt Spine Removal and Subsequent Un-Removal look like train tracks :) because i think it's cool

- whenever someone gets incredulous about how much stuff and people and places they know of or about or just straight up know their reply is "i have Lived a Life"

- that post about aragorn son of arathorn being sad(lonely) BECAUSE he knows so many people, not despite knowing so many people or knowing so many people despite being sad(lonely)? yeah that applies here. always missing someone. pulls them in so many different directions and yet! and yet! they wander down a new path. courier walking instinct.

- oh yeah they definitely have something set up so the Followers can use the resources of Big MT. that's probably their most regular delivery

- ANOTHER THING! pre-benny incident, the NCR had put a bounty on one of the Khans (haven't thought of a specific person) and Sirenity just. took the wanted poster and moseyed on over to their camp to warn them ("you...? why would you do this?" - "well, if someone i cared about had a hit put out on them, i'd sure as shit want to know about it") and that's how they meet Jessup and McMurphy

- and then DURING the Benny Incident, during the "maybe the Khans don't look the people they kill in the eye-" line, Sirenity shoots Jessup a Look that says "you work with this guy???"

- needless to say they were. very blasé about mortal danger. still is. if there's a multi-perspective story they're really going to try and find the other perspective(s)

yayyyyy okay i think that's it!

Nobody including me posts about their ocs enough so please please please reblog reply or whatever with some oc tidbits!