#they're a butch couple to me.
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answertocarnality · 3 months ago
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diversity win! the two bloodied men who just smashed UP your car also smashed IN your car !!
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mirensiart · 1 month ago
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okay, but if some members of the chain have a period, which ones do you think they are?🧐
Listen, I am a lesbian who loves and is very fond of butches, so my fave male characters are never safe from my butch lesbian beam...
That being said, it's butch he/him lesbians twilight, warriors and sky to me lol
Anyway, I am personally extremely open to all hcs and I don't consider my hcs to be definite i am a uh multi headcanon girlie, I just like having fun!
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quackle · 4 months ago
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i can't wait for emily to take over this show and host season 4 and make it a better place for everyone, especially the butch lesbian contestant we'll be getting 😁✊🏾 (this is manifestation in the works everyone let me cook)
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bbeeew-boodles · 6 months ago
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Ppg if it slayed
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torahtot · 11 months ago
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ok ive had enough of queering judaism. can we start judaizing queerness now. or something
#like. it feels like so much of this queering judaism shtus just layers an american/secular queer identity over judaism#which i guess is fine for certain communities. but it's only going to push you away from orthodoxy#and if as queer jews we already feel like our queerness makes us into secularized outsiders in our own communities#how does this help? is trying to get our communities to embrace an essentially secular american iteration of queer identity supposed to mak#us feel LESS like outsiders? it's not quite doing it for me#we need a queerness that comes from within judaism that is essentially jewish#ive seen a couple of articles recently from ppl talking abt how word/concept of butch doesnt exist in their language & culture#but they use it anyway#& like. i love being butch. it's important to me ill never give it up#& i am american too. but my whole identity as a butch he/him lesbian is exclusively secular american it came from the outsifr#which is definitely due in large part to the fact that my Gender Problems were really tied up w orthodox jewish gender roles#so naturally to get out of that i'd pull on something not jewish. but i wish there was another option? idk if that's possible#or how it would look#maybe that's why im obsessed w the idea of a butch w long curly payos.... 😦#i forgot where i was going w this but yeah it's frustrating#this is a large part of why im wary of starting a queer Jewish club on campus bc the people who would wanna start it w mr#well no offense but they are insufferable about this#(incidentally they're also insufferable about chanukah. no surprises there)#op#jew blogging#others have Actually written abt all this tho
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priestblaster · 10 days ago
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is anyone else been getting force fed a disturbing amount of casual biphobia lately????? i really do try to go out my way to avoid it but it's been everywhere and about everything???? sometimes i think bisexuals should be meaner
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sunnibits · 2 years ago
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I can’t explain it but I feel like desmond and penny from lost are lesbians in the same way that aragorn and arwen from lotr are lesbians. yknow. does anyone understand me.
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mercuriart · 1 year ago
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hmmm i want to be. a little bit controversial. but i fear this is the no nuance no critical thinking webbed site. and i don't want to start discourse on this account. ill just. tags.
#yeah y'know what? yes. it's fair to say 'i dont have experience writing this marginalized gender/sexuality and want to research#before writing something offensive'#like. if you spent your entire life consuming mostly mainstream media (as we all have! yes that includes you!)#you probably learned a few stereotypical portrayals. or more than a few#you're probably used to seeing tropes used a certain way#you may not know those are problematic tropes with the specific whatever you're writing#like. you decide to write a wlw ship. you decide to do something urban fantasy proximal and apply a trope you enjoy. all is fine#whoops you've accidentally turned the butch in your classic butch/femme relationship into a monster. oh geez#and since you're used to seeing the trope with het couples you just. write it the same way#and now you have a portrayal of butches as violent agressive monsters. oh no#(yes this can be done with nuance but I'm talking about like. people new to writing mostly. people who haven't written about these subjects)#ok another example. you write a mlm ship. you think well it's two men i know how to write men. you decide to make one of them kinda evil#now you have a gnc dude that's evil and manipulative and a liar. oh no#again: you can add nuance and reclaim these tropes. write characters as full characters and all will be fine#but. BUT. if it's your first fic with such a ship. you may make mistakes with those nuances#some of those harmful tropes get WORSE if you add depth the wrong way#(again. happened to me. had to do a full rewrite of a character when i realized.)#i know it's really funny to dunk on homophobes/misogynists who dont realize that gay/female characters are. well. characters!#but to make fun of people for doing research/being worried about perpetrating harmful tropes#because they're inexperienced? c'mon.#also like 90% of y'all making fun of those writers (the inexperienced ones) COULDN'T write a nuanced aro or disabled character so.#a/n:#actually deleted that last tag. too scary
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lizardlicks · 1 year ago
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I love working in medicine. I especially love working in medicine as a queer person because I get to see the entire breadth of our community. It's not what you think it is.
Do you know how many older gay and trans people I meet on a daily basis? It's not all young, thin teens with dyed hair.
There's this one gay couple, in their 60s, always get their lab work done together, always leaning into each other and laughing about some private joke of the week. They lost a bunch of their friends in the 80s, and they always remark about how good our facility is to them. They smile when they talk to me like yeah, we made it, we're still kicking and screaming, and by god that's how we'll go out.
This butch lady with pure silver that works at a mechinc's shop down the street and always calls me sugar when I see her. Checked in a person the other day who looked like the blanded most non-descript typical middle age cis dude, but went by a femme name and had x/nonbinary gender tag and they/them pronuns.
Then there's the young trans kids that are tto scared to dress the way they want most of the time, still uncertain about using their name and pronouns in a medical setting until we do it for them withiout them asking, treat them as the gender they prefer, and you just can see the weight fall off them as their care giver team treats them as human and with such care and love. They're always smiling by the end even if they had to do something frightening and painful.
The 20 and 30 somethings that I see going out of their way to interact with me because I'm proudly, visibly queer at work, most especially for them because we all need to know that there is someone looking out for us when we're vulnerable. We exist as this vibrant, complex tapestry, so far outside of the way we get stereotyped and talked about online and in the media. My god we are everywhere, experiencing life in ways you will never know about. You are not alone. You were never alone.
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elizabethrobertajones · 2 months ago
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summer scions!! I absolutely love the new portraits for all their smug happy expressions. Except Y'shtola, who is not going to deign to give a camera a proper saucy look because that's silly. Urianger is smirking twice as hard on her behalf.
Glam review under the cut!
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I unlocked Alphinaud first of the twins and didn't know Alisaie had a little necktie yet, so I'm deducting a point from my first impression because the sheer delight that he had a silly little necktie of some sort no matter the situation delighted me so thoroughly. Since they're still engaging in matchy twin dressing to some degree, I have to assume they either like it and won't admit it after digging in so hard, or Ameliance sent them off with cute outfits and matching backpacks, and they still don't really shop for themselves.
He's got the practical watch/compass gloves which are good for a technically proficient Sage and probably the most practical gear he's ever worn except for when he was poncho Alphy, but wearing ankle-length jeans seem like the least weather-appropriate choice of the Scions if we assume their average skin coverage is a good weathervane for the temperature in Tural. I chalk it up to teenage awkwardness.
8/10 unless he and Alisaie chose their outfits themselves, in which case it's a 9/10
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I think Alisaie is the only Scion to keep a single piece of their default gear, and those are her usual gloves. She's colour-matched around it.
Because of the gloves and boots, she looks the most ready for hardcore hiking, somehow, and her matching Alphinaud with a cute button down shirt with rolled up sleeves along with that particular choice of baggier shorts (when she normally wears more form fitting shorts) do give me the closest to butch vibes it's probably likely to get for main characters. So I'm giving her an extra point I stole from Alphinaud for the lesbian vibes.
9/10 or 10/10 if she made these choices all by herself.
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Everything about this cracks me up, from his portrait above to the image of him tanking open shirted once he pulls mobs.
Believe it or not, he's getting an additional point for those shoes simply because the competition in practicality in tanking is G'raha.
I had a moment of excitement when I thought the necklace was pink because that's always a cute Ryne/Minfillia thing fanartists give him with ribbons and such, but once I got zoomed in on him it was red, so I guess he's just been shopping. Although, the turquoise shorts are her eye colour and the actual large diamond shapes are secretly Mothercrystal coded in those colours, which just cracks me up that you can pick out one of the worse days of his life (Urianger's grand Warrior of Darkness plan) in his Chill Summer Beach Vibes look.
Douchebag beach bro shell bracelet as well, which really makes me double down on him and Urianger spending way too much on tourist bait along the stalls in the Famous Turali Market. The hat and sunglasses are giving him one of the Most tourist-y looks thematically reflecting how a lot of the Scion guys were just here to hang out, narratively or literally. Maybe he's trying not to get such an intense tan again, which is the only reason he's not entirely topless.
11/10 I could not stop laughing when I got him and Urianger to 100 and Beheld The Brilliance in the same moment.
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Please note the raised sunglasses in Urianger's portrait, which are not the model his character uses.
I am delighted that I had been incorporating that island watch into my healer glams on both the logic you need to know your clock positionals but also they're largely the smarty pants jobs (WHM being vibes only aside - it gets its own glams :P). And here's Urianger and Alphinaud both using watches.
Now, I had a moment of being vaguely disappointed he had trousers not a skirt or something else swishy and androgynous, but then I did realise that I, a nonbinary weirdo who relates to Urianger since he made me nonbinary, have actually gone to a couple of garden parties dressed in some variation of this exact outfit of light trousers and a nice button up. Plus, the earrings are in both ears, so no "Google, which ear is the gay one?", these are just straight up cute femme dangly earrings with his favourite little dudes on.
More importantly, the colours he's repping are those of Lopporit Radio. He probably tunes in every night for his broadcasts :')
Mirrored sunglasses for the guy notorious for keeping thoughts and plans close to his chest and choosing deliberately to be enigmatic even when it serves zero purpose except for I guess gender affirming care. (The gender is Weird Bitch.)
I can't tell how I feel about those dad sandals. I suppose it depends if he's wearing them like a fashion model (brand new and clean with perfect pedicured feet) or if those are REALLY dad at the beach-like and, since I'm not a foot person, this for me is only a choice between "not off-putting" and "AURGH".
9/10 the proximity to Thancred hauls him up several points of misgivings I had, and the lopporit shout outs are killing me :')
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I unlocked Y'shtola last and holy fuck I am a lesbian. I don't even recognise where those boots come from, so either a really expensive glam or something I just have not stumbled on. She has toe rings I think? And painted nails? I have no idea if the garter (?) is part of the boots glam or a custom thing as result of not recognising the boots and how much of them is normal. I feel like they customised a lot on her anyway - the back of her top has purple beads that match her staff (not dyable on the real piece)
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and I think the necklace has to be part of the top instead of a separate necklace piece with the way it hangs, AND the bracelets are a glove piece with the original summer glam, but I assume they're layered with the false nails, also in the glove slot. All in all it's giving the sort of effort which is starting to creep up to what I'd expect from the modding community not the game. I mean, not THAT good but getting close. Baby steps towards what fandom can make :P
She really is god's favourite meow meow.
Anyway I can't really judge this fairly because it's really hot and I love her so I'm just going to give it 100/10 and move on. :)
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how did I get a picture where Estinien looks like he's stooping to get in the frame...
The fact he has Azure Dragoon Blue Top and then Violently Nidhogg Fuchsia shorts is the colour theory that absolutely killed me. When he lights up during his burst and starts glowing pink all over his shorts are like. Taking him over like the eye once did I think.
love a guy who can embrace his past trauma and dress to match all that has passed before and all that he intends to do now (kill something large and tasty, grill it on the beach, fall asleep with a beer in hand until the waves come in and wake him up).
I gave him that wooden bracelet in the glam he has on my desktop screen so once again I'm feeling weirdly vindicated.
Other details: no ponytail despite the warm weather because he's got enough ventilation. The fact there's cactaurs on his shirt when he's on record for eating them is amazing. We should imagine he's wearing his jobstone like that pendant (since he's one of the only guys with a confirmed jobstone despite being the Guy Without A Job notoriously that one time.)
Unlike Thancred's hat and sunglasses combo, which seems fun and boisterous somehow, he seems the most walled off of all the sunglasses wearers even though he's not the most mysterious. The visor really helps make it a sort of wall. Maybe just because his terse upfront personality and somehow despite his clothes horse habits THIS amount of whimsy seems the most out of character at first glance, but he DOES look uncomfortable to me.
Somehow I find everything about this outfit excellent for his character but also like maybe he was forced into it, everyone cornering him and telling him the Scion Beach Party was a mandatory work event and he was not allowed to beg off of it and he did put some work in expressing himself but also is going to go find a much quieter corner to lurk in for the day, when not competing with Thancred (can't grill, loves it) for the barbeque (Estinien can grill, would only do it because the threat of Thancred doing it wrong is too high).
confused 7/10 mostly because I think Krile is blackmailing him and not because I don't love everything about this.
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Here's how G'reenha Tia can still win -
Anyway here's the deducted point for tanking in flip flops (PERFECTLY acceptable BLM gear btw but he's Mr Versatile.)
(I joke but the main character of my novels is a flip-flop wearing menace who could and would tank in them)
Between the padlock and key necklace and the woven bracelet right after we all went feral over the Thavnarian bracelets for couples thing so recently (and Corvos is just across the water!) he's absolutely dripping cutie pie love interest coding yet again.
(Also yes I know the lock and key thing is very funny because we were introduced to him learning he was a fancy key to a big door.)
Gains a point back because the other green g'raha thing is I'm pretty sure people use this shirt glam because it kinda looks like it has weed on it.
Don't quote me on that, vibes only.
Anyway he came colour coordinated (with his original eye colour and hair colour not the bright Allagan dalamud red dye that goes with his normal outfit) so so precise and neat, like he's going to some sort of formal event, and even with flip flops he really does seem incredibly put together like the twins or Y'shtola, just for full outfit cohesiveness.
As someone who would hold G'raha's hand on the romantic gondola vibe, 10/10.
3 out of 10 and a huge cringe if you would not. He's got to stop Striving.
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Hey it's the star of the show!! Adorable hairstyle out, cute plot-important earring on, and wearing her exact character colours but adorable beach wear :)
I love that she looks kind of like she went to the girls for advice and got the top from Y'shtola and the shorts from Alisaie, and she probably was very serious and stressed about getting this right even though there's no rules and no one's judging her -
oops.
Anyway the ballet shoes are adorable and go with all the cute picto spins and twirls :)
I think the strict colour scheme does speak to the slight lack of fleshing out she got so far in the story (we don't really have any real character reason that picto in particular spoke to her and this glam isn't one of the many fun takes people had on how to dress to meet that brief ). I don't think DT did more than just repeat that she's serious and sweet and trying really hard to get out of her shell and be more fun and creative and also she's been practicing dodging really hard she shouts mid-Trust combat (bless her). But ALSO getting out of the shell is really hard and she only found out everything and got some closure in the final level 100 quests so there wasn't really much to do with her after that.
This is like her First Non-Plot-Critical Whimsy Moment and losing the hood or any cat ears entirely (and there are perfectly functional cat ears to wear in game) is a good step considering we know she wears it precisely because she needed a sort of advance PR campaign to make her look cute and approachable before she opened her mouth and started bringing down the vibe (serious scary children are SO funny though and i love that for her). Having the same top as Y'shtola is a good thing for trying to make her less childish and have her trying to show that now as she takes this huge step out from the background. I mean, it still has a slight sense of her costuming herself and pushing herself out of comfort zones as she always does, but it's 100% in character so I adore it.
1000/10 because Krile is great and there's so much going on here and it's so fun when a character's whole personality is a costume and then they're like aurgh wait do I even want that??
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lovelaceisntdead · 7 months ago
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She has a date with the bartender btw. I saw a butchfemme couple dancing together and I nearly cried in the middle of the bar
Been abandoned at the club on drag night. She's gone to flirt with the bartender.
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indigostudies · 9 months ago
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very silly post but i wanted to unwind a bit so i thought i would rate chinese endearments!
宝贝:classic, casual endearment. i call my cats this, has a similar feel to "babe" for me. 4/5, one point deducted because it's pretty basic.
宝宝:like a cutesier version of 宝贝, i would never call a romantic partner this, but it's great for pets and children. 3.5/5, points deducted because it can sound kind of trite or cringey.
亲爱的:much more formal, has a similar feel to "beloved" or "darling" to me. arguably my favourite endearment because it literally means "[one] who is an intimate love". 5/5 if an s/o called me this i would melt.
老[姓名]:this can come off as overtly lovey-dovey at times but it's also really common among married or long-term couples. it doesn't really have an english comparison but personally i think it's very sweet. it can also be used teasingly which i enjoy. 4.5/5 with 0.5 points taken off because it can sound kind of old-fashioned.
老婆/老公:an even more married version of the above; this feels much more teasing to me, though. 4/5 with one point deducted because unfortunately 老公 can also mean eunuch (oops).
(老)狐狸(精):i've only ever heard this in dramas as a reference to a man, but it's meant to call someone sly or cunning. can be admonishing, but can also be an affectionate reproval. can also be used for women, but then to me it comes off as a bit more judgemental, so 4/5.
小哥:technically a descriptor of a young man, but i'm personally attached to this as a term of endearment, and if someone called me this i would be smitten. i think it has been gaining some popularity among chinese sapphics, especially butch lesbians/T's? but unfortunately i don't.............really use social media so i can't confirm this.
姐姐/哥哥:these are technically originally terms for older brothers/sisters, but they're also used for people of the same generation who are older than you, and can be used in a flirty way. 4/5 only because non-chinese english speakers can get kind of weird about them.
阿-/小-:personally i prefer the 阿- suffix over 小- because 小- sounds like you're talking to a child to me, but i'm aware this is very regional. not overly romantic, but can be very sweet, so i'm giving it a 3.5/5.
those are all the ones i can think of off the top of my head, but if you have any others you can think of, let me know!
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yellowocaballero · 3 months ago
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i very much enjoy the extremely scientific analysis of the naruto verse in which there are three genders, aka naruto, sasuke, and Woman.
AM I WRONG? AM I WRONG? pulls down projection screen and plays powerpoint
Obviously let's give room for nuance. A ton of Naruto characters don't fall into these gender norms. This does predominantly apply to the rampant proliferation of the three-person dynamics that were assigned by the government and dictate your entire life. And, like, society. It does not end. Gender isn't a biological factor in Naruto, it's a social dynamic constructed entirely by your homoerotic tension with other men. And there are so many.
Madara (S), Hashirama (N), Mito (W). Izuna (N) and Tobirama (S) - tragically, Izuna died before women could be invented. Sarutobi (N), Danzo (S, horrifically) - see above about women not being invented yet. Jiraiya (N), Orochimaru (S), Tsunade (W). Yahiko (N), Nagato (S), Konan (W). Obito (N), Kakashi (S), Rin (W). Shisui (N), Itachi (S), that little deeply unimportant girlfriend (W). Um, fucking, Naruto (N), Sasuke (S), Sakura (W). Even - even, fuckin, Rock Lee (N), Neiji (S), Tenten (W).
And what do they all have in common????
(OT3. They're all OT3s. Is what I'm saying).
There is some room for alternative gender expressions here, like being butch or femme. Naruto gender expressions: teacher, otouto, woman who you can't even tell is woman gendered because she has no backstory but you just have to kinda assume that she has a polycule-based backstory where she was Woman Gender. I feel almost as if 2/3rds of the Rookie 9 are liberated from this. InoShikaCho just doesn't fit (their chaotic cousin energy is just too strong and Ino's too much of a lesbian). Hinata's too busy being defined entirely by a different throuple's N to have codependent dynamics with her own N and S (and I'm hesitant to even say that, since I actually don't know if Kiba and Shino have a codependent rivalry - do they?).
I get, like, the reason for all of this. Curse of Hatred. Cycles. N and S Genders being sourced from demigods or something. Narrative parallelism. Sympathy points. It's not the bad guy's fault he's evil, his N and W gendered counterparts died :(. But an extremely strange side-effect of this is that all of the male characters are, like, Just Naruto or Just Sasuke. But the vast majority of the female characters are - like, completely defined by the men in their lives - but also they are more likely to be a unique person. Mito, Sakura, and Rin have actually nothing in common. Writing so sexist it creates more interesting characters?!?!
Unironically, this is why I'm always saying that Sasunaru is the ship of all time, nothing will ever top it, you will NEVER do it like Sasunaru, etc. Every important relationship in the series is meant to evoke Sasunaru. (Notably, none of the explicitly romantic ones. But we're beyond such paltry understandings of the most iconic pairing of all time as fundamentally based in romance. We're operating on a higher level than that). This unbroken chain of toxic yaoi has culminated at the end point of Sasunaru, and it exists to parallel Sasunaru and define their relationship by the dysfunction of generations of tragedy. That's why Naruto has to consciously break the cycle and free them from the generational hate - it was the only way to save Sasuke. This is also why I'm always saying that Sasunaru is the point of Naruto, and that the entirety of Naruto is about Sasunaru. Come back to me when your work has invented new genders in the all-encompassing pursuit of toxic yaoi.
This also means that the only truly gender non-conforming individuals in Naruto are its mightiest heterosexuals: Minato (W) and Kushina (N). Truly insane. The N/S/W configuration is the societal norm, it's bonkers to make a major good-aligned male character a wifeguy. By Naruto standards Minato and Kushina are the only queer couple.
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archangeldyke-all · 4 months ago
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this with blue collar butch!Sevika 🥹👁️👁️
https://www.tiktok.com/t/ZTNAM4RrN/
this is too fucking cute i know i've already done like two stories about this exact same thing but idc it's SO SWEET
men and minors dni
most mornings, you wake up alone.
sevika's shifts start in the early morning, whereas yours start at a more reasonable hour. she usually sneaks out of bed and the house hours before you even begin to stir.
and then, usually when you do wake up, you're in a mad dash to leave the house on time.
this morning though, you woke up about an hour before your alarm's was meant to go off.
you groan and flop on your side, trying for a few minutes to go back to sleep, only to give up five minutes later and smack the bedside table for your phone.
you read the news, catch up on emails.
you've only got one new text-- the same text that greets you most mornings: 'good morning love. left breakfast in the fridge for you. thinking pizza for dinner tonight? xoxo 💐💍 -s'
you smile big and bright like you do every morning, then jump out of bed to the kitchen, excited to see what sevika's made for breakfast and give her your compliments over text.
only, as you run into the kitchen, your eyes catch on sevika's lunch pail and her travel coffee mug resting on the counter.
you realize now why your body so stubbornly refused to go back to bed for an hour: some subconscious part of you must've known sevika would need your rescue this morning. (sevika swears that since you've been married you've developed some kind of couple-telepathy-- both of you are always supernaturally aware of the state the other is in, without having to even see each other.)
you decide to surprise her, dressing and eating quickly, withholding your usual lovey-dovey texts to her in exchange for the real life smooches you'll soon be pressing on your wife's cheek.
you love seeing sevika at work. she looks so fucking handsome in her uniform, her co-workers adore you, and the brilliant, surprised smile you pull out of her when you drop in to check on her always gives you butterflies.
you slip in through the front door, waving at thieram where he's talking on the phone behind the front desk. he grins, gestures to the break room, and winks at you.
it looks like they're in their morning meeting, silco and vander standing at the front of the room and reading off clipboards while sevika, ran and the rest of the boys fidget in their seats.
when you peek your head in, all the heads swivel to the back of the room to gawk at you. laughter and greetings erupt, and sevika's face breaks into that glorious shy smile of hers as she leaps out of her chair and runs over to you.
"baby, what're you doin' here?" sevika asks, pulling you in for a kiss before you can respond. you giggle against her lips, then reveal her lunch and coffee to her.
"you forgot somethin'. think our weird psychic link woke me up to make sure i could get you your food before work." you tease. sevika blinks down at her lunch pail and coffee cup like you've just handed her keys to a new car. you giggle, and kiss her cheek. "breakfast was delicious by the way."
"i love you so fuckin' much." sevika whispers, blinking back up at you. you smile, and sevika shoots forward, kissing you passionately in the doorframe.
her co-workers burst into cat-calls and laughter, and silco clears his throat from the front of the room.
sevika pulls away with a bright red blush, but she doesn't take her eyes off of you as she walks backwards back toward her seat. she bumps into lock. he shoves her away, and she stumbles a bit, giggling but still staring at you as she flops back into her chair.
you blow her a kiss, wink, and let the door close.
taglist!
@fyeahnix @lavendersgirl @half-of-a-gay @thesevi0lentdelights @sexysapphicshopowner
@shimtarofstupidity @chuucanchuucan @badbye666 @femme-historian @lia-winther
@ellsss @sevikaspillowprincess @emiliabby @sevikasbeloved @hellorai
@glass-apothecary @macaroni676 @artinvain @realgreeniebeanie @k3n-dyll
@sevsdollette @ellieslob @xayn-xd @keikuahh
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dragonstailbutch · 5 months ago
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Hey sorry i am trying to like. find examples of what you mean when you talk about mra stuff and (trans)misogyny in forcemasc content and tumblr search has betrayed me once again, can you explain?
(sorry I normally wouldn't ask but I wanna make sure I'm not perpetuating anything!! Also fucking tumblr search!!! it is ridiculous!)
so ive been sitting on this ask for months since ive got it. i want to do it justice and try to take it at face value that its being honest in asking.
The thing is, theres this trend and a weird amount of effort to be like force femme, to be forceful and like its something to fearful of and give in to. But we cant do that, cause all that does is reinforce the idea that being a man is a toxic thing. I saw this post the other day where a transman talked about like, the whole "raised as a weapon" thing, the violence and horror of being a man and raised that way versus how they felt growng into it as a transman. How they wanted to reclaim that phrase or something? i could be misremembering.
But that was never the intent of forcemasc. It wasnt actually about being a dude, literally *forcing* someone who was unwilling into masculinity, none of the posts that i made that started the community (and yes i, a transfem butch woman, started and made this community and some of yall need to get over yourselves) were ever about that, it was intended to be a soft mimic or even a call to forcefemme.
i was all about making it soft and tender for a reason, cause if i didnt i was only reinforcing the toxic masculinity narrative, "men fighting in the mud" "men are dominant and cool" " to be a man is to be forced into masculinity and to be disgusted with the feminine" or whatever. When masculinity isnt about just men, and being butch isnt just being masculine. masculinity should also be sensitivity, not domination. i wanted it to be better, show a better side of what masculinity could be, what being butch is.
Ive spoken before a bit too, about the tags people used and added to forcemasc, and really maybe i was wrong in ever naming it forcemasc. people used and still use tags like autoandrophilia, autoandrophile, androphile, autogynephilia, androphilia, and autogynephile. Ive seen so many people with urls and tags and posts calling themselves transandrobros, literally calling themselves MRAs, as if that was something to be proud of, as if they dont understand that they arent fighting for their and our rights, they're fighting for cis-mens rights by using those names and terms, not transmascs/transmens rights. I can understand ignorance, but weve talked about how the words you use have history, especially those like the tags i mentioned and androphilia and androphobia and others, all of them have roots in deeeeeeeply misogynistic and transphobic people and history.
Literally all of these are awful and are phrases that arent and wont be reclaimed because theyre history is one of pain and hurting trans people, one of coercive 'help', literal forced detransitioning and reinforcement of MRA and terf narrative that men are both good and the worst creature alive and that to be a woman is to be disgusting and the purest thing all at once. That to be a transwoman is sick and we shouldnt be trusted.
Im trying to be very kind, not scream and rage, not because i dont desperately want to, but because if i do, as a butch transwoman, ESPECIALLY cause i claim being butch, people wont listen to me no matter how much of what i say is meaningful. one of the reasons why im doing this NO, instead of in anothr day or two, is that im coming to terms with the fact that the situation will just get qorse, not better without words.
Part of why im still sane is that ive gotten a couple asks here and there about how my posts and creation of the community has helped them and its so wonderful to see that, genuinely so amazing to see people recontextualize and love themselves. its wonderful and im so fucking happy about it.
i personally made this space so i could love myself, who i am as a trans person and my body, and i knew that other people needed and wanted that for themselves too and i wanted to help, share this love with more people. That to be hairy and chubby and masculine and butch was a nice thing. But to me it feels like it was coerced into being a thing for Men. A thing no longer for me or people like me who share the butch culture and name to no longer enjoy cause people unfamiliar with kink and tran history have decided that masculinity and butchness are the exact same thing. Id say people should go be a bear, but you wont learn their culture either and thats cruel and insulting to bears.
We deserve better You deserve better. Stop falling for the lies and hate. We beg you
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transexualpirate · 10 months ago
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i love the lesbian couple that lives near my parent's work. they are super nice and they live in a farm with nine dogs and over fifteen cats (not an exaggeration). im pretty sure one of them was in a cult when she was younger. they're both butch and one of them says she doesn't see gender for anyone ever, only presentation and pronouns. she still uses the word lesbian to herself because she thinks it sounds cool. all animals in their farm are rescues. they have more coconut trees that they can account for so everytime we visit they shove coconut at us and we leave with at least ten in our car because they literally don't know what to do with that much coconut. their existence fills me with hope
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