#they’re literally just their boss and it’s everyone else is friends

[isa-ko]

Random little things abt Mortier according to the biographies by Léon Moreel and Frignet-Despréaux

So today is Mortier’s birthday which gives me permission to go all out and yap about him. Idk how this list got so long but there’s a lot of free space here soooo hope no one minds🥺

* Léon Moreel describes Mortier as a “big boy.”

* He is literally his dad's clone. His dad was also very honest-natured and everyone liked him. His dad also was involved in merchant and farmland business. His dad also served for a time (before getting arrested)

* His mom was English. Mortier became fluent in English from the college he went to. One of his possible jobs after he was fired from his first one was a maritime job be he spoke english

* Mortier's first job was in a merchant's office in Lille. He got fired because he couldn't tie knots on the messenger bags well TT

* Mortier loved horses. He created a stud farm later in life where he bred horses specifically for his heavy self. His coat of arms have horses. He always checks up on his horsies even when he's far away. He had a favorite horse named Le Favori who went on 12 campaigns with him. He lets Le Favori retire on his land and live off his income until old age. Then he makes an epitaph for Le Favori when it passed away at age 28.

* In his retirement, he also created his own farm with crops and animal stuff too

* Mortier once got very mad at his drunk valet and called him a pig I know that's not uncommon for people in general but it's rare to find mad-Mortier moments like these

* Mortier and Louis-Philippe become good friends for many years. They first meet when Mortier was still just a volunteer in the army around 1792. Louis-Philippe was wondering what time it was and saw a huge Captain over there so surely that guy knows

* Mortier and Lefebvre are good friends too. One time Mortier found an enemy carriage by luck and sent it as a gift to Lefebvre. He also let Lefebvre take all the honor for capturing Danzig even though Lefebvre offered to enter the city together (according to Moreel, Mortier declined)

* Mortier and Soult are good friends too. Unofficial pen pals? For example, Mortier telling Soult what his new livery would look like lol

* Mortier and Moncey also seem to be good friends. They write to each other about farming techniques in retirement, and Mortier got a very sweet letter from Moncey that he cherished after returning from Russia as the ambassador

* Mortier and Bernadotte seem to be good friends too.. possibly? They hunt together and have lunch. Bernadotte writes to him that they’re besties at least

* Mortier once became Josephine's temporary window shopper in Hamburg 1806. And then he stole (???) from the Emperor of Russia's Chinese collection for her (????)

* Mortier's literal army baby is the 23rd cavalry regiment. Before he took command of it, he was not yet involved in cavalry and would dream of that position. Once he finally got it, he found that this regiment was suffering from something of an "inferiority complex." It apparently seemed too much like the King's Regiment and was once under suspicion and lost its rank. Mortier did his best to bring them back up. Even after Mortier had to leave his command there for higher ones, he always kept tabs on the 23rd and would try to provide for it and keep it close to him. Eventually it did get removed completely though...

* When he first got appointed Chef de Brigade to 23rd regiment, he got a whole new army fit so his first order of business was to go home to Le Cateau and show off the fit. He then takes a 2 day detour to Coblenz to show off his fit again but this time to his to-be wife Anne Eve Himmes

* The golden retriever comparison works so well. My guy is golden retriever personified. He is very loyal and very obedient to his boss and colleagues, a bit too much gets him in trouble at least twice

* Mortier would rather most anything else than have conflict on the same side. He fears a Vendée. He haaates internal conflict.

* He's generally very respectful to cities/states that are to be captured and governed. This is shown by all the gifts and letters that those places give him when he leaves and sometimes when he comes back :) A few of these places: Hanover, Hamburg, Anclam, Silesia, Saragossa, Talavera

* Hanover specifically gifted him two cannons with his initials E. M. on them. One of the biography authors, Frignet-Despréaux, is the greaaat nephew of Mortier and has written that he had fired these same cannons with Mortier’s grandsons. They were fired every year on August 15 at a Château de Sceaux.

* After Battle of Paris in 1814, he stays at Fontainebleau ready to be called on again by Napoleon. Once Napoleon abdicates, Mortier still stays with Napoleon, from April 10-12. However, that showed some offense to others, so on the 12th in the morning he gets recalled back to Paris by the Minister of War, but Mortier decides to stay with Napoleon for the rest of the evening anyways

* Mortier staying with Louis-Philippe (and Louis XVIII) even as Napoleon returns from Elba in 1815. When Davout sends his ADC telling Mortier to arrest him, he lets Louis-Philippe know and lets him leave. Then after he leaves and releases Mortier from his orders, Mortier gets called to Napoleon. Napoleon accepts Mortier but Mortier still tries to let him know that he had went against Davout's message 👉👈

* Mortier gets sciatica and is immobilized and cursing in his bed when Ney visits him to borrow horses for Waterloo lol

* Mortier having a “mini club” in Paris of people from his home region that he sometimes attended in person and they called him their president

* He was a 1.95 m farm boy. Can't forget that one. At the 23rd cavalry regiment on a staff map, he wrote down his height and scribbled, "promising to grow still further if that is the will of the Almighty.”

Frignet-Despréaux

Le Maréchal Mortier, Duc de Trévise (1768-1835) by Léon Moreel

[kimstills]

some reassurance - aaron hotchner x gn!reader

in which you try to provide aaron with some reassurance after he asks for his worst qualities.

content warnings: a little hotch aftermath of s2e15 (nothing goes into detail), no haley in this story but no real mentions about her, the team is kind of mean, aaron and reader literally flirting even tho reid just got kidnapped not too long ago. word count: 1.5k a/n: inspired by this post by @greg-montgomery ! my man is not a bully <3 also not proofread oops

he’s a classic narcissist.

he thinks he’s better than everyone else on the team.

what’s my worst quality?

i have no sense of humor.

you don’t trust women as much as men.

you can be a drill sergeant sometimes.

you’re a bully.

you’re sure that if the words of the events from the past 12 hours have been ringing in your head since they first happened, they’re probably ringing in hotch’s head, too.

but you’re also sure that he’s trying to play it as if nothing happened. as if he didn’t get completely verbally obliterated by his team members.

you lost count of how many times you had turned to look at hotch from the moment reid had chosen him to be ‘killed’ after tobias hankel had asked him to pick someone from his team. from the moment you had all figured out where the devolving man was keeping reid.

from the moment you had saved your friend, to the moment the case had been wrapped up, to the moment your boss had just now ordered everyone to take the weekend off right after arriving back to the quantico headquarters, despite immediately locking himself in his office afterwards.

you had contemplated saying anything from when reid had first chosen hotch as hankel’s sacrifice, and you contemplate saying anything now as you stare up at his office, the curtains having been drawn and the door closed ever since coming back, even when everyone else was gathering their things and was about ready to leave.

you didn’t know what it was about hotch or your relationship with him, but you had always found yourself protective of him ever since breaking through the ‘cold’ and ‘stoic’ persona the team had made up for him and crafting a genuine friendship with him.

you had been the first to follow after him when he had left the room with all the computer screens where you and your team had watched reid ‘choose’ him, hot on his heels trying to reassure him that the young genius wasn’t in his right mind.

it had been impossible, though, watching in silent horror and palpable confusion as he asked the rest of his team to list his worst qualities while trying to realize that everything spencer said was on purpose.

what emily had said, you had let slide. she was new to the team, and although you reassured her that all would turn fine in her journey with you and the rest of the bau, you couldn’t deny the lack of trust the others had in her.

derek butted heads with hotch the most and was the most brazen when it came to standing up to him, never afraid to call bullshit even with knowing that hotch was hard on him because he knew of morgan’s potential.

what jj had said, though, you didn’t understand. there had never been a time where you could actively recall hotch being purposefully rude or mean to anyone without it being called for.

he could put people in his place and humble an officer or two when needed, but he had never been mean to you nor to anyone else just because. so, when the words ‘bully’ left jj’s mouth, you couldn’t help but furrow your brows and send a glare her way despite the traumatic events she was still reeling through.

spencer had said himself that he knew hotch would understand, so you could only assume that everyone else had assumed the older man wouldn’t take anything personal, especially after being the one to ask the question.

you had only given his shoulder a squeeze seconds after he ordered everyone to get some rest, offering a comforting smile.

but you knew that wasn’t enough.

so, before you even registered what you were doing, you brush past the startled and confused stares derek and emily give you as you stand abruptly from where you had been perched on your desk and march up the stairs to hotch’s office.

the determination in which you made your way up there contrasted from the gentle knock you raptured on his door, waiting patiently for the deep voice to allow you to enter.

at the sound of his permission, you stepped inside, smiling softly when aaron looks up to glance at you.

he’s standing on the left side of his desk, shuffling papers together and sliding them into a manilla folder. he seems tense, like he finally let himself feel what he was trying to avoid back at hankel’s house, but, solely from the warmth of your smile, his shoulders drop and his body languages is immediately relaxed by your presence.

“i thought i sent you home?” he asks, giving you a knowing look as he stacks the folders neatly on one of the baskets he kept in one of the corners of his desk.

you shake your head no, “not yet,” you close the door behind you gently, catching a peek of morgan and prentiss’ confused stares before turning to look at him.

aaron’s brows furrow at you closing his door, “are you alright?” he asks, stopping in his movements.

you shrug, “as alright as i can be, i guess,” you say, fiddling with your fingers. you feel yourself growing shy under his perplexed stare, but you push it down in order to ask, “are you alright?”

aaron blinks at you, the crease in between his forehead deepening even more, if possible. after a second, you can see the gears winding in his head before it all clicks together, the hardening stare he wore slowly dropping as he realizes what you mean.

“i’m fine.” he says shortly. you know from the many times you’ve accompanied other members of your team to check up on him that they would normally drop the questioning after that, but you weren’t like the rest of them. apparently.

“aaron,” you speak up, his gaze immediately flickering back up to you at your use of his first name, “i don’t think you’re a bully,”

your tone is genuine and comforting and he wants nothing but to completely delve into it. to bury himself in that same comfort and simply stay there as you whisper reassurances.

but the only thing he does in response is shake his head, continuing his maneuvering around his desk as a way to avoid what you were trying to do, “y/n, it’s okay.” he shakes his head, “i didn’t take any of it personally. gideon was right; reid wasn’t in his right mind during then,”

you shrug again, trying your best to get him to look at you without rounding his desk and standing right in front of him, “still. what jj said was pretty uncalled for,”

“well, i was the one who practically called for it,” aaron reminds you, looking up at you through his lashes as he continues to fix files.

you hum. you don’t know if what you’re trying to do is working or not, but you see the harsh lines around his brows soften and a faint pink bloom at his cheeks, one that makes your own face heat up.

“well,” you huff, “i also think that you’re pretty funny.” you shrug again, “really funny, actually.”

everything you’re telling him just now is true, but this is the most honest thing yet. derek, emily, and spencer all had their funny moments, yes, but aaron’s sense of humor was very similar to yours. and, to be fair, it didn’t come out as much due to him sticking to that false persona.

but when it did, you were the first one to understand the joke or the first to laugh and even the one laughing the hardest.

once again, aaron is frozen by your words, this time completely dropping what he was doing to stare you with bewilderment. he raises a brow, “you do?” his question is hesitant, like he doesn’t believe you.

and you know that he doesn’t. so you nod, “yeah,” you smile brightly at him, “you make me laugh a lot. even more than morgan.” this time you’re the one hesitating, taking a moment to wonder if what you’re doing is crossing a line between you and him. “or anyone else, really.” you tilt your head, “you’ve never noticed?”

aaron’s face is now a hot pink, and if it wasn’t for the sake of keeping up with his ‘stern’ facade, you’re sure he’d turn away and envelop his face in his hands.

he’s the one to shrug this time, “well, truth be told, i always get distracted by you.” a beat of silence passes before he clears his throat, averting his eyes to what you think is your shoes, “and your laugh.”

you beam despite the feeling of your face getting even hotter at his confession. you can’t help yourself from asking, “you like my laugh?”

“there’s a lot of things i like about you,” aaron admits, much more confident this time, a fond expression adorning his features.

you blush under his gaze, trying your hardest to conceal the wide smile that was threatening to appear on your face. you rock on your heels, hands folded behind your back shyly, “there’s a lot of things i like about you too, hotch.”

“aaron,” he says, not liking the way ‘hotch’ sounded after hearing you say his first name, “aaron, please,”

this time you can’t help the smile that pulls at your lips.

no, aaron hotchner wasn’t a bully at all.

[formulafics]

★ THE JPG CHRONICLES | PART 2

Scenario: the long awaited jpg account from everyone’s favorite mclaren reserve driver is here. with her second and third post, yn accidentally strikes some confusion in the fandom.

Pairing: f1 grid x fem!reader

A/N: and the drama begins 🤭 who do you think the bf is? who do you want the bf to be? 👀 hope you guys enjoy!

PART 1 | PART 3 | PART 4

yn.jpg

liked by landonorris, logansargeant, oscarpiastri, georgerussel63, and 234,762 others

yn.jpg user @/oscarpiastri is eepy and hungry

view all 3,421 comments

oscarpiastri idk how to feel about this one

⤷ yn.jpg you should feel honored to be featured on my account :)

formulanorris yn it’s a little past 9 pm…

⤷ yn.jpg sorry my bf was harassing me at that time.

⤷ formulanorris BOYFRIEND?

⤷ gretavanf1 …ain’t no way bro 💔 my wife has a boyfriend

piastrispastry yn said “be there at 9” then showed up at 2 am

⤷ rizzciardo she just like me fr

papayabull does this mean oscar is this weeks favorite boy?

⤷ yn.jpg yes but he doesn’t get full credit. we were going strong and then he hurt my feelings (he said he wouldn’t go out to eat with me)

⤷ oscarpiastri because zak brown, my boss, told me i had to be at work. key words: boss, work.

⤷ yn.jpg you hate me. it’s fine.

logansargeant every day i fear that i’ll be on this account

⤷ yn.jpg your time will come don’t worry

⤷ logansargeant i’m scared

norrisnation ARE WE IGNORING THAT YN SAID “bf”

⤷ sainzchili yes bc she’s silly and probably was joking

yn.jpg

liked by landonorris, pierregasly, alex_albon, daniel3.jpg, and 254,678 others

yn.jpg two posts in one week? 😱 crazy, ik. anyways, here’s a lil appreciation post for the boy who’s taught me all i know about photography. <3

view all 3,458 comments

norrisnation THESE ARE SO CUTE

landonorris i didn’t know you were capable of taking good pictures

⤷ yn.jpg i didn’t know you were capable of being funny - oh. you aren’t.

⤷ formulanorris LMFAO I AM SCREAMING THIS IS SO FUNNY i love yn 😭

norrisnation …is this a bf reveal?

⤷ yn.jpg nah lando is just my bestest friend in the world and i love him

⤷ rizzciardo yn and lando are my favorite friendship :( they’re my kids, i feel like a proud mom

landaurnorris this is a lil TOO appreciative for yn and lando 🤨 i think this is the announcement team

⤷ norrisnation she said no 💔 i thought they’d be cute together

⤷ formulapapaya if you ask me, she and oscar are dating. i’m 100% convinced

⤷ rizzciardo i need a full twitter thread abt this rn or else

⤷ formulapapaya BET. i will literally start working on it now because i’ve believed in oscyn for so long now 🤭

🏷️ | @jsjcue @treehouse-mouse @renarots @minkyungseokie @raizelchrysanderoctavius

[firenati0n]

the full spectrum of human emotion

by firenati0n on ao3

M | COMPLETE 6/6 | 54k

ch 1 | ch 2 | ch 3 | ch 4 | ch 5 | ch 6

tags: the proposal au, the proposal (2009 movie) fusion, fake relationship, fake marriage, marriage of convenience, relationship speedrun, banter, flirting, not-quite-enemies-to-lovers

Alex grips his hand tighter. They’re going to need to have a long, hard conversation in the next five minutes, or else Alex is going to combust right here in Pez’s fancy office. Explode for all of Midtown Manhattan to see. Here lies what remains of Alex, for all the world to witness—taken out by a rogue marriage proposal from his evil boss-turned-fiancé.

Or: Working under editor Henry Fox-Mountchristen was only supposed to be Step One in Alex’s plan of achieving his big dreams—but when his boss winds up facing an even bigger problem, potential deportation, Alex finds he isn’t just a beleaguered assistant anymore. He’s the solution.

It’s fine. They only have to fool his friends, and his family, the United States Government…and themselves.

xoxo roop

sappy thoughts and tags under the cut <3

this is my first longfic and i owe its existence to a lot of people, but really if it hadn't been for me having a dream about it and @kiwiana-writes saying "write it and I'll cheerlead"...it would not exist. period. i fucking love you MJ. you are literally the best and i wouldn't even have an ao3 if it weren't for you so. everyone say THANK YOU MJ

tagging some folks who have expressed interest in the past:

@cha-melodius @rmd-writes @dumbpeachjuice @slowlyfoggydestiny @heysweetheart-writes

@anincompletelist @anchoredarchangel @ninzied @welcometololaland @stratocumulusperlucidus

@onthewaytosomewhere @hgejfmw-hgejhsf @suseagull04 @violetbaudelaire-quagmire @dragonflylady77

@onward--upward @junebugclaremontdiaz @celeritas2997 @14carrotghoul @itsmaybitheway @bigassbowlingballhead

@whimsymanaged @littlestar2911 @saturntheday @affectionatelyrs @happiness-of-the-pursuit

@priincebutt @duchessdepolignaca03 @blueeyedgrlwrites @theprinceandagcd @sail-not-drift

@nontoxic-writes @cultofsappho @alasse9 @ships-to-sail @galitzine-nick

@lightninghitsground @sherryvalli @changinghearts @seanchaidh7 @bambinick

[christinesficrecs]

I had a request for newer fics, so here you go! Also, some other recent fics were posted here.

They’re all together ooky, the Hale family… (Snap, Snap) by DropsOfAddiction | 12.4K | Explicit

Derek realises that he’s probably squashing Stiles a little bit, right at the same moment that Stiles apparently realises that he’s still holding onto Derek’s face.

They both definitely acknowledge Derek’s nakedness at the same exact time, judging by the alarmed look on Stiles’ face.

“So, you have no clothes on,” Stiles removes his hands and holds them above his head in surrender, cheeks a muddy red.

“In my defence, I was covered in fur less than two minutes ago,” Derek rolls his eyes and he pushes himself up and off him, hands covering his junk for Stiles’ sake.

“You’re still kind of furry now…” Stiles sits up, blinking rapidly, clearly just as weirded out as Derek. “Oh my god, pretend I didn’t say that. I’m not looking or anything.”

Derek smirks, because that… that was a lie and he cocks an eyebrow at him.

as dear as a brother by endversed | 10.3K | Explicit

“You are not allowed to sleep with him,” Scott says.

“You’re not the boss of me,” Stiles scoffs.

Stiles and Scott become best friends at college. Derek is Scott's hot older brother.

Take Me Away From Here by Hedwig221b | 33.5K | Explicit

Derek Hale looked terrifying. With his broad frame and muscles, with his wild black hair and thick beard, with his eyes the color of blood and fangs of a killer. Despite his kindness and his apparent attraction to Stiles, he was still a stranger, a predator, a wolf.

The thing is, Stiles would deal, but others might not. People found Lord Hale horrid, monstrous and unapproachable.

If Stiles stood behind him, no one would touch him.

He’d be safe with the wolf. If not from him, then definitely from everyone else. And that was enough.

Messily Ever After by KaliopeShipsIt | 20.3K

When Stiles and his blue slushie have a literal and quite splashy run-in with an adorable five-year old flower girl and her panicking daddy in the middle of the mall, the last thing he expects is to get a date to a stranger's wedding out of it.

Let alone, a boyfriend and a kid.

His Accidental Touch by Hidden_Orchard | 12.8K | Explicit

It happened accidentally, the first time. All the many and varied times afterwards, Stiles would hold his hands up and admit full responsibility for. But that first time – pure chance.

Derek needs a cuddle. Stiles - generous man that he is - would never deny Derek something he needs.

An Alpha's Misunderstandings by Dexterous_Sinistrous | 48.5K | Mature

And Derek was there, as if it was a simple twist of fate.

There were so many ways Stiles wanted to forgive Derek, but then he came to his senses.

He wouldn’t risk Charlotte’s safety for that hope–never again. ~*~ Stiles and Derek are parted by war and misunderstandings, only to find each other again.

Red, Red, Red by loserchildhotpants | 9.4K | Explicit

“Just… it’s weird, I’ve been - uh. You ever, like, dream of something? Something you’ve never seen before, but then you see it out in the world?”

everywhere, everything (every day) by nerdy-stilinski (Captain_Ameriyeah), S3anchaidh | 14.3K

Derek’s never been the best at making decisions. That’s how he keeps waking up with Stiles in his arms, but never under the right circumstances.

Or: Derek agrees to a pack vacation and instantly regrets it.

Matchmaking in Fandom by isthatbloodonhisshirt (wasterella) | 13K

It wasn’t like it was a secret that the showrunners made terrible decisions when it came to their own show, so why he’d had actual faith in them not fucking the movie up, he had no idea. Really, it was his own fault.

He hadn’t even set the bar high for the movie! The bar was so incredibly low, like mid-shin height, and they somehow managed to get it subterranean. That was talent. A bad talent, but still a talent.

if i'm not made for you, then why does my heart tell me that i am? by EvanesDust | 13K

When Derek’s kids write out their Christmas lists, they insist he writes one too. Not long after it's deposited in Santa's mailbox, he's reunited with the man of his dreams.

Stiles.

Derek can't help but fall for him again. It's really too bad Stiles is so obviously taken.

...or the one where Derek’s a grump who makes assumptions about his pregnant omega neighbor.

[hazshit-hotel-hater]

Gotta love waking up to Vivzie saying enjoying a rapist character is totally fine and definitely has no effect on real life. Yeah no man if you want to be super into a rapist character whose only personality is being a rapist go ahead man, really. Im sure that wont fuck you up mentally in the future or potentially ruin your ability to discern right and wrong when it comes to other forms of media or real life. Who gives a fuck if a character gets raped on screen!! They’re a funny cartoon character!

I hate this lady with my entire being. The comment on the top is absolutely rancid. “it's funny how that argument is always ignored when people express how things like Hazbin make them feel seen or effect their real world experience positively.” Hey Viv, your creation and watching a character get raped on screen actually impacted he horribly and very negatively but hey, I guess I’m just being sensitive right? I guess everyone else who has felt mistreated, offended, and fetishized by your show is just a party pooper. That sucks huh.

“Maybe let people enjoy things, even if you don't.” Yeah I’d fucking hope I don’t enjoy rape. Y’know Vivzie has done such insane damage to the indie animation community and also just the online space in general and she’s never going to recognise that. I could be Viv’s best friend and tell her that her show made me feel disgusting about myself and feel like nothing more than a stereotype and she would fucking cut me off. I know this because this has literally already happened. Fuck Vivziepop.

I genuinely don’t think I’m going to talk about any current Helluva Boss or Hazbin shit because of how horrendously this fucking media affects my brain. If I post it’s about design or pre-existing plot. Till Hazbin season 2 comes out and I can pirate that shit I’m not dealing with this shit anymore. Sorry Vivzie but I don’t actually like seeing the twink bird abuser live in his victims house. I don’t feel bad for him at all. Helluva boss was originally kind of funny here and there but the episodes now are genuine fucking brain rot. I cannot bring myself to put into words how dogshit they are now.

Anyway, hope Vivzie fuckin gets therapy or gets her show cancelled. Not to be one of those crazy people that’re like “YOU SHOULD DIE I HATE YOU!!!” Cause frankly I don’t give a fuck what she does as long as it ain’t anything to do with me, but if she like died in an explosion I would not give a shit. Anyway. I have work to do. Have a hateful day and then chill out later. As much as I enjoy criticising, being negative constantly isn’t healthy. If you’re in a hating spiral, give yourself the rest of the day to get it out and do something you actually enjoy. Check my stuff out on my main blog @skreebs if you wanna see some of my Inanimate Insanity stuff. Love that show����

[eetherealgoddess]

Sorry if I’m interrupting you but can you make a enchantress fem reader who seduces yandere bonten and her plan is to poison them and report back to her boss her job is done but they caught on can you end with smut

The smut is gonna be dark af. Might be triggering for you. Just an extra warning. Hope you enjoy!! ♡︎♡︎♡︎

ꨄTo Fool Is To Be A Foolꨄ

Oneshot - Yandere Bonten, Fake Stripper Au

❦You are an assassin disguised as a stripper to poison Bonten❦

Sano Manjiro, Hanemiya Kazutora, Sanzu Haruchiyo, & Haitani Brothers x Reader

Not fully proofread

MY TR FANDOM WORKS ARE ONLY ON TUMBLR, AO3, AND WATTPAD UNDER EETHEREALGODDESS! REPORT IF YOU SEE IT POSTED UNDER ANYONE ELSE BUT ME!!!

I apologize if I get any Japanese etiquette or culture wrong, I literally have to research the culture for some of my fandom stories so if anything is wrong, please excuse my ignorance.

Notice:

✩Y/n is 18+. I picture her as a black female but you can see her however.

✩Some parts of the story may not be realistic or factual. After all, this is a work of fiction.

✩Although it's a dark 'romance,' I do not condone any of the behavior displayed.

✩Dark content such as: gore, violence, triggering topics, graphic scenes, vulgar language, explicit sexual content, etc.

✩There may be scenes that involve non con and/ or dubcon so don’t read if that makes you uncomfortable

✩That being said, this story is for 18+ only.

Enjoy!

To Fool Is To Be A Fool

You release a giggle as you lean into the chest of the tall executive, his heavy lidded gaze staring down at you while you sit on his lap. One hand holding a cigar while the other is placed on your bottom.

You hold back from gagging as you attempt to be as flirtatious as you can without also seeming suspicious, occasionally feeling the mic under your lingerie pressing against the skin of your chest area. Fortunately, having been chosen to be a seductress before, you already knew the protocol for this mission. ‘Work’ at one of the Haitani’s clubs as a stripper for a few days, seducing them to gain access to the club, tricking the Bonten men into drinking the poison hidden in the alcohol.

While these specific Bonten members attend the club, the rest of your team will ambush the executives at Bonten’s headquarters. There is also a team, including your best friend and husband, and a few others who will be on standby, listening to your conversation in the vip room from the outside. Once the employee brings the spiked beverage in, they will drink and your job will be done once you make it out safely, reporting back to your boss.

The only problem was that the leader of Bonten decided to join the men deemed as easy to seduce, which wasn’t a part of the plan. He’s not known for drinking or smoking so he may not drop dead as the others will. Luckily, one against a team will never work out for the Yakuza boss, so he will end up dead one way or another.

You all sat in a circle of sofas and chairs, a long glass table in the middle. The three stripper poles sat on the stage, three ladies twirling and dancing as the men gambled and conversed. The hand on your bottom rubbed up your back as the music played in the background. Although you were focused on the executive whose hair you were caressing, you could feel the intense gazes of the other men who sat in the room, having become familiar with them all except the boss for the past few days.

The server finally came in with the glasses filled with poisoned booze, along with the bottle in the middle. She passed a cup to everyone besides you, unknown to the toxin that’s mixed in with the liquid. They’re all leaned back in their seats, man spreading while some sit with their ankle resting on their lap. The boss is leaned over with his arms against his lap, tired dark eyes staring at the bottle that sat in the middle. As you all thought, he didn’t even touch the glass that the server handed to him, having to place it on the table in front of the platinum haired male. An eyebrow raises as you notice the men who held their glasses, setting them on the table.

“Pretty girl.”

A hold on your chin turning you to face the rest of the men, causing you to shift on his lap to turn your whole body with your back against his chest. You're forced to face the boss who sat across, the other executives holding amusement on their faces while his expression stayed stoic. The glass is held in front of you from behind, the executive taking a hit of his cigar before blowing the smoke out.

“Why don’t you take the first sip?” You felt the vibration of his sultry voice against your back, keeping your expression straight so as to not ring any alarms. The team tenses as they listen to his suggestion.

“I’m not allowed to drink our guests’ beverages.” You smile politely, using your hand to gently move the drink to the side, your hand dropping when you see his grip tightening around the glass, holding it in place.

A deep chuckle released from a few of the men who sat in front of them, a particular executive who had his arms stretched across the top of the sofa as his leg was crossed. Using his index and middle finger to grab the blunt out of his mouth, a smile growing on his face. He sits up to pass the blunt across the table to the golden eyed man.

“We own this club. Take a sip.” The younger Haitani states. Your smile slightly drops as you bite your lip, nerves beginning to take over as you try to gain control of the situation.

“I’ve already drank enough tonight. I don’t want to fall off the pole.” You chuckle, hoping a joke will deter the direction in which this is going.

“I don’t think you understand, Y/n.” The one with blonde strands states, licking his lips before taking another long drag from the wood. He ashes it before passing it to the one with a pink mullet.

“If we tell you to do something, you do it.” His smile drops as he stares into your eyes, your own smile dropping as your heart begins to pound. You shift in the older Haitani’s lap, beginning to pick yourself up before he puts the cigar out and wraps his free arm around your waist, glass still in front of you.

“Ah, ah, ah. Where do you think you’re goin, princess? The fun’s just begun.” You could hear his smirk in his statement.

“Why do you look so nervous?” The pink haired man questions before putting the blunt out. “It’s just a little booze. What’s the problem?”

“Say the signal, Y/n! Goddamnit!” Your husband whispers as his nerves are struck, hand trembling while holding the gun as he fears for your life. Your friend bites her nails as she awaits the word, eyebrows furrowed as the rest of the team listens in.

“Shit!” The commander hissed, throwing his pager on the ground in anger. Your friend turns to him as well as some of the other members.

“What’s going on?” One of the teammates questions in confusion, eyeing the man who paces back and forth of the hall, rubbing the sweat off his forehead.

“Their line was cut off abruptly. They had only just entered and all he screamed was ambush.”

“What does that mean?” Another teammate asks. The commander looks up with pure discomfort written on his face.

“It means they knew we were coming.”

“Y/n.” You look into the boss’s direction.

“Drink it.”

You stared at the liquid, face morphing into displeasure as you pause. Your eyebrows furrow with frustration as you realize you have failed your mission. You know that they know and now you have to evacuate the situation. Swinging your arm, you knock the glass to the floor, toxic liquid splashing as the glass shatters.

“S-O-S!”

The men immediately stood up with their guns facing the team who barged in, the room erupting in chaos and gun shots as the strippers left the stage, covering their heads in fear. The hand around your waist tightened as you tried to rid yourself of his grip. Your pressure point is pressed resulting in your body limping as darkness engulfs your vision.

You wake up to what you would imagine hell sounds like, screams of pain in the distance as the stench of residue death and blood reaches your nostrils. Opening your eyes, you come to your senses as you look down and see yourself completely bare. Eyes widening as you notice the tightrope that’s tied around your wrists and ankles. You’re lying on a worn out bed, bare mattress as your arms are stuck above your head, as well as legs spread as you struggle against the rope. You stare at the grimy floor, dried blood and bones lying around the room.

You eye the ceiling of the warehouse, bright lights hanging above as you shift your gaze to the machine that holds two thick vibrators below you near your ankles. Your eyebrows furrow as you notice the huge screen displaying a lot of movement in front of you, releasing a muffled scream as the cloth against your mouth blocks your speech.

“You’re awake.” You turn your head, only just now noticing the old couch facing the screen on the right side of you. Sitting on your right were three men, one of them walking towards you as the rest drank their alcoholic beverages. Two chesterfield chairs sat on your left, facing the screen.

Manjiro sits on the bed next to you as he looks ahead, all the while the screen displaying the members of your team running around and shooting as well as being shot at. Your heart pounds as you search for your husband and best friend, tears threatening to fall as you deny the thoughts that fill your mind.

“You put on an exciting show, I’ll give ya that.” Kazutora chuckles as he watches the screen, leaning back on the couch as he glances at you.

“Very entertaining indeed.” Ran takes a sip of his drink, sitting back with his legs crossed in the chair.

“You almost got us, Y/n.” Rin states, sitting on the chair next to his brother. “Pretty impressive for a conniving slut.”

“To think you could deceive us for as long as you did. Disgraceful.” Sanzu hissed as he narrowed his eyes, watching himself shoot another enemy on the screen. You could only watch in silence as Mikey’s gaze turned to you.

“Unfortunately, you’ve caught my attention.” He says as a hand slowly runs up your stomach, his fingers gripping your naked breast. Your eyes squint as your face warms with embarrassment and disgust, discomfort from being naked in a room full of your enemies. You feel so raw and vulnerable as you're humiliatingly nude for everyone to see. You wince in pain as the boss squeezes your nipple, pulling it harshly as he holds it in place.

“Keep your eyes on the screen.” He demands, releasing your nipple as he walks back to his seat on the couch.

You watch in fear as the screen displays two of your favorite people who are forced to kneel as they’re tied, facing the camera with tired looks.

“Where’s… hah….my wife you piece of shit?” He pants, his face and uniform bloody as his hands are tied behind his back. He grunts when a kick is met with his stomach before the person steps on his back, shoving him on his face.

“Shut up.” Kazutora hissed, grabbing the man by the collar and forcing him to sit up, only to kick his stomach again.

Your hands turn into fists as you struggle against the restraints, whimpering as the rope rubs into the tender skin. Sweat drips down despite the cold room, your body completely tense with anxiety. Your friend is quiet, barely awake as she leans over, grunting when she’s hit with a baton on her back.

“Sit up.” Ran states with a sly smile, a relit cigar in his mouth as he grabs her hair and yanks her up.

Sanzu crouches next to her. “Smile for the camera.” He grabs her chin as he forces her to face the camera.

Mikey pulls out the remote, clicking a button as the bottom vibrator extends, heading towards your bottom. You yell against the cloth as it comes closer to you, wiggling your body as you shut your eyes, bracing yourself as it makes contact with your anus. You groan in pain as it eases into your dry asshole, your stomach tightening as your head falls back and legs tense. The residue lube on the vibrator makes it easier to slide in, though the pain remains. The movement halts as soon as the object is deep inside of your ass.

“Watch the screen, Y/n.”

You return your teary gaze back to the screen, complying to not receive worse treatment. A lower setting is clicked as a sensation begins inside of you, buzzing along your walls. You squirm against the weird feeling as you watch your husband get kicked in the face by Rin, blood shooting from his nose before he drops his head, spitting a few teeth out. You grunt as the dildo is dragged out, rubbing along your walls as it continues buzzing before it’s pushed back in deeply.

The motion repeats as you throw your head back, the pain becoming a weird sensation that stimulates the walls of your ass, a fullness taking over as your hole becomes used to the size, the speed accelerating only slightly as your vagina becomes naturally wet, juice oozing to your asshole. Your nipples are rock hard as the cold air kisses them, the screen displaying your friend being snatched by the neck before she’s thrown against the ground, the end of the baton pressing into her back as she groans in pain.

The lower vibrator continues to buzz as it stops pulling in and out of you, pressing inside of you as the top vibrator moves closer to your pussy. You whimper as you cry against the cloth, watching as your husband gets shot in the shoulder by Kazutora, screaming in pain. Tears stream down your face as you watch Sanzu use his katana to stab it through your friend’s calf. Your friend screams, tears fall as she yells out an ugly cry.

Blood splatters as he yanks it out causing another cry to leave her mouth just as the vibrator eases into your vagina which causes you to cry out along with your friend. A pain forming considering the lack of vaginal juice, there only being enough for the rubber cock to enter deeply. It’s pressed against your cervix as it’s held there, the lower cock moving against your anal walls. You squirm once more, shutting your eyes again as you breathe through the pain.

Just as the cock pulls out of your vagina slowly, it’s shoved back in deeply as your head drops back. It repeats the process as your vagina becomes easier to access, rubbing along your g-spot with each thrust. Conflicting feelings form, a pleasure coming from your lower half as you watch the screen in terror. You glance at the men who were all facing the screen, watching themselves torture your family.

Ran stands from the chair as he walks to your bed, the rubber cocks accelerating their speed as one goes in and the other goes out. He leans over as he eyes your burning face.

“You’re a very lucky girl, Y/n.” He says before his lips meet with your cheek, a thumb grazing your sweaty forehead as you look back at him with wide eyes. You follow the other hand that came from your other side, the fingers caressing your neck.

“Otherwise you’d have the same fate as them.” Sanzu says before leaning over and kissing your lips above the cloth, his fingers circling around your neck as Rin and Kazutora walk to either sides, eyeing the dildos as Mikey pressed the button for them to go the same pace as well as thrusting into you at the same time, the rubber in your vagina hitting your g-spot repeatedly as it speeds.

Your hips buck uncontrollably as the sensation becomes intense, Kazutora reaching over to rub your clit as your arms pull against the restraints. You couldn’t hold back from the groans and whimpers that left your lips. Sanzu moves his hand to your chin as he turns your head slightly, biting your ear before licking along the lining. Ran lowers his head to your neck, sucking and kissing the tender skin as Rin lowers his head to your nipple, flicking the nub with his tongue before he closes his lips around it.

The katana slices through her opposite leg, hands gripping the handle making sure to add pressure to the wound.

“Please! Please just kill me!” She cries out, snot and saliva leaving her mouth as she tasted her own salty tears, the blood puddled under her causing a wetness to form against her pants.

Your husband is kicked from under, a shoe connecting with his testicles as he gives out a silent scream, losing his breath as his face turns completely red. Another punch, another kick, and another hit lands before another shot rings out, a bullet penetrating his lower back as another bullet penetrates his other arm. You turn your head to look away from the gruesome scene.

You finally begin to cry as the cocks penetrate your holes, engulfed by your own juice as they speed up. Pleasure shoots through you with each hit of your cervix, hips grinding against the rubber as you feel shame and embarrassment from the sensation as your husband and friend are being tortured right in front of you.

“How could you be so turned on by the sight of your loved ones dying?” Rin teases against her nipple, eyeing up at her with lazy eyes.

Mikey presses the button to accelerate the speed once more, your body tensing at the newfound electrifying feeling that pounds your pussy. You wail against the cloth as you watch the katana slice through your friend’s torso before it's pulled all the way through, half of her body detached from the rest as it falls over. You grunt and cry out more as your husband was shot repeatedly by two different guns, bullets going up his body repeatedly before landing in his torso as well as his neck, and head. His lifeless body falls limp as your head falls back.

Your hips buck up as you orgasm, screaming against the cloth as the cocks continue to overwhelm you as well as the fingers speeding against your clit while the camera is turned off, resulting in a white screen. Your eyes shut tightly as tears fall, the dildos going at a rapid speed as you near another forced orgasm quickly, your body convulsing as your nails pierce your palms.

“How does it feel to cum so hard while watching your loved ones die? Do you feel dirty?” Kazutora smiles as he continues to rub your clit, the dildos continuing to rub against your walls.

“You should. It’s disgusting.” Sanzu hissed against your ear before biting your neck.

Mikey walks to the end of the bed, staring at you with sunken eyes as you watch him turn up the vibration.

At this point your eyes were far up your head as you trembled against the feeling numbing your core, forced to release another orgasm as you grind it out.

Finally, the dildos vibration halts before they’re slowly pulled out of your pussy and anus, as well as Kazutora removing his fingers. All of them move back from you as you breathe heavily, tears still falling from the traumatic event you watched in front of you.

“Welcome to your new home.” Ran smiles as he pats your head.

“If you behave, you’ll get to move to our shared estate.” Kazutora beams.

“Till then, we’ll give you time to think about what you’ve done.” Rin states.

When the executives walk to the exit, Mikey stands above you. He only stared down at you before he turned to the screen and pressed the remote to replay the footage. The buzzing dildos come toward your holes once more as he leaves the room. You scream for help and beg for him to turn the video off. You cry hysterically as you're forced to take the rubber cocks once more as you watch your husband and friend get tortured again.

[kinokoshoujoart]

CORRECT TAGS‼️‼️‼️‼️ @rn0na-lizard you are so so so correct….. my favorite ‘Normal Girl’ in hmds…….i almost never see anyone talk about these aspects of her let alone also love her for them as they should.

i feel like Leona/ DS lumina gets mischaracterized super often which is understandable bc out of all the DS candidates leona is the least like her ancestor (who i also love, for different reasons).

in AWL lumina was the only kid in the valley for a very long time, but many of the DS residents have lived in the valley their whole lives. while lumina had accepted her role as a proper young heiress by chapter 3 of AWL— and when DS begins Leona already at this point of her life— lumina still had a lingering sense of uncertainty and angst and loneliness and doubt, and unresolved worries about her parents. absolutely none of this is present with leona

in this world leona starts with Lumina’s 22 year old appearance, she’s just rich as hell and living her best life (as she deserves), she’s unabashedly shallow, puts herself first always, speaks so politely and affably yet she can be so casually cruel in the most genuine cute way and out of touch with reality and and i fucking love her and i’d die for her. my beloved girlboss girlkeep girlypop

more iconic Leona Moments

when muu/muffy asks for beauty advice leona’s recommendation is “this brand of mail order beauty cream is simply divine! and it was quite inexpensive too, just 100,000 G 🥰” everyone else looks uncomfortable and muu is like “you’re as frivolous as always….”

aside from the 3 who take literally half your money (Witch💖, moi, and thomas) leona and panama (romana) take the most money from you if they carry you home when you faint. just a couple of girl bosses holding on to their girlpire (btw shout out to sebastian, the only resident in the entire valley who carries you home for free)

neither panama nor leona attend the harvest festival, they send sebastian there by himself to test the food first lmao (if you poison it like the witch they’re harboring on their property requires you to do, sebastian is just like “i can’t serve this to Mistress Panama…”)

once again sebastian attacks mukumuku for her sake, this time not to make her a paintbrush but she told him to get her the best slippers and this was apparently the easiest way. sebastian gets fucking mauled btw

leona has hands down the best romance route in hmds. all her scenes are incredible but god the slow burn friends to lovers with your DVD player….

in her purple heart event she shows up at your house because she heard you have a DVD player, asks you to show her how it works, and then just leaves after she’s done playing with it

in her yellow heart event she has sebastian fetch van so she can buy a DVD player for herself but van’s like “i’m so sorry …. Pete… bought the last one….”

leona is so unable to stomach the idea of other people having things she doesn’t that she starts to cry and the only way to placate her is to tell her she can go to your house anytime she wants just so she can use your DVD player. that’s not a setup to a budding romance that’s her final heart event

it’s the most incredible romance arc in the world like girl you have infinite money you can just. buy a DVD player somewhere else?? “i want to watch DVDs at my house just like you!” leona you have three entire bedrooms

“rich girl love interest who has everything except love, win her heart by having genuine conversation with her”: done to death, tired, i don’t have time for that

“rich girl love interest who has everything except a fucking DVD player, win her heart by giving her expensive stuff and ‘relax tea’ and access to your DVD player”: audacious, intriguing, never been done before, innovative

if you deny her god-given right to access your DVD player she is like “Is that so……………Just let me be alone for a little bit.” incredible tragedy i understand. take as much time as you need to grieve darling

oh but her first heart event asks you to pick a side in an argument she’s having with panama and the correct answer is to say “sebastian is the one who’s wrong” (sebastian has said nothing wrong this whole time and yet both of them have just been yelling at him to shut up)

and her blue heart event is “help me find this heirloom necklace… boohoo…” and when you find it she’s like “perfect! now grandma won’t get mad at me. hmm, you seem pretty dependable…♡” augh she’s way too good at this…….!!! i’ll do anything for you!

when you propose she says “of course, i always dreamed of having a romance and a wedding♡” and says nothing abt how she feels about you <3

also if you marry her, once a week she goes to hang out at her ex love interest’s place for 6 hours straight and comes home saying “whew… i had so much fun that i must have lost track of time… i’ll hurry on home”

if you marry another girl she starts flirting with you like “I’m so envious of your wife, having such a fine husband… Pete.” (or whatever your name is)

i’ve become obsessed with her and romeo’s horrible trainwreck soap opera marriage since replaying cute in jp… it’s SO… i have so much to say about them that it should be its own post but i’ll just give the cliffnotes

shotgun wedding vibes. romeo is surprised by his own wedding. they’re childhood friends but he himself has never considered marrying her. her words to him at their wedding are “Make me happy♡” (command)

she understandably can’t stand his terrible table manners or his clothes or anything about him (except that she wants to watch him surf and have his child. but he instead walks in circles all day. coward) and he’s both really good at accidentally stepping on landmines and just ever so slightly majorly terrified of her after marriage (“but surely her angry outbursts are just her way of showing love hahahahaha” you’re going to die. she’s going to kill you). the only positive things they say about their marriage are extremely shallow. they can’t communicate with each other because romeo always says the Dumbest Shit obliviously and leona always responds by cutting him out of her life forever!!!!!! (for 5 seconds) while he has no idea what happened

they are both so melodramatic and they both just do nothing except make each other worse and run away from each other and push each other away but they can’t escape each other. neither of them ever has to grow or change if they marry each other because an elderly overworked man is sustaining both of their existences and neither of them can take care of themselves and i love them your honor

also romeo’s first crush as a kid was apparently her mom, and if leona falls for YOU she flirts by mentioning that sebastian says you look like the spitting image of her dead father. dear fucking god

they’re the epitome of “You're both just enabling each other's mental illnesses. You're both perfect for each other. Never change. Just never involve anybody else in what you've got going on.”

romeo really does feel like her stupid lackey. like the karen to her regina. they even had this dynamic in the games they played as kids… she was the Harvest Goddess and he was Servant A/Minion A (they might still be playing this game as adults…he calls her lady/mistress sometimes after marriage…)

btw leona’s best friend (wife) marivia is also just as… there’s an event where they just gossip about all the mineral town ppl and marivia says ann would win a gluttony contest and they both giggle

there’s also an event where marivia casually walks into Witch’s hut and just interviews her so she can write her into a novel. witch is left completely drained by this exchange. leona and marivia both are so chill about the horrible cruel villainess living in leona’s shed who wants the town poisoned and rewards you for killing animals and hurting yourself and is putting curses on everyone (and they’re right. she’s never done anything wrong in her life)

[nylongenesis]

Here’s the thing about Timothy stoker

here it is the tim post

People who say tim is an asshole are partially correct.

People who say tim is ‘toxic’ are INCORRECT.

I am very strongly about this because. listen to me. okay.

SPOILERS UP TO TMA SEASON 3 AHEAD

Imagine BEING timothy stoker. After whats probaboy the secondmost traumatizing experience of your life in which you almost die if not by the worms then by the MEDICAL EMERGENCY (respiratory acidosis is a medical emergency :3) your body was put into- plagued with nightmares and the pain of your body being covered in holes and your medical issues, you come back to the archives expecting to see your best friend, That will make it all better. It’ll be so worth it once you can see her again.

And then she acts so distant. And you dont know why.

And you have just lost your friendship. The one that’s kept you going this whole time. The one you were starting to believe might have been unbreakable. And you Don’t. Know. Why.

Eventually after many failed attempts to reconnect, you resign yourself to the fact that she just got tired of you. That you were right this whole time. That she just pitied you. You still don’t know what you did wrong and it’s eating you alive, but she won’t tell you, so you have to settle with pretending to be glad that she’s at least alive, All while your boss is literally going insane and STALKING YOU???

Only to find out after a YEAR of believing you were just unlovable that this person? The person youve been trying to ‘reconnect’ with? That isnt your best friend, Your best friend dies and you never noticed. How could you not notice? But when you see the real picture of her she feels like a stranger and you realize you have no fucking escape from your horrible, unforgivable sin of forgetting your friend. Because no matter what you do, trying to look back at your memories, that *thing* is there instead. You can’t even enjoy your memories before she died.

So you sit there, alone and afraid. Angry, grieving, everything else. What are you supposed to do but make the thing that has haunted you since the disappearance of your Brother feel the kind of pain it is making you feel?

Tim isn’t toxic. Hell I wouldn’t even say he’s that much of an asshole.

He’s a hurt child.

Mentally, especially in season three, he’s having the equivalent of a child’s breakdown. The kind they have when they don’t know how to express the emotions they’re feeling. These emotions- this grief, this anger, this pain- it’s so big, it’s so much, and he feels so small, so incapable and weak, and he cannot properly handle it. He cannot cope. Especially since he’s still somewhat trapped in who he was when his brother was taken.

Now im not saying the way he went about this is at all great, but yknow. Everyone forgives reactions to trauma until they’re personally inconvenient or ugly.

Tim lost everything, and honestly i would be pretty damn similar if I was in his position! That’s DEVASTATING.

In the end, there’s such a horrible tragedy to his entire character that goes almost entirely unnoticed unless you’re like me and you’re insane and overanalyze someone based on one word in an extra audio thats not in the podcast.

Anyways, that’s why I love Tim.

[trashogram]

I was talking about this for an OC, but it could just as well work for Blitzø/Reader.

Warnings: Dead Dove for abuse and cruelty

Blitzø leaves for Stolas’s palace on the Full Moon for their deal, but he doesn’t come back the day after. Days pass in fact, and I.M.P. aren’t able to get a hold of him. It’s worrying.

Reader’s part of the team and decides that enough is enough before boldly going to find Blitzø. They end up scaling their way into the place and find Blitzø — alive but clearly irritable and on the verge of snapping at the owl prince, who seems oblivious.

Reader is so relieved that they simply rush over to Blitzø and hug him, grateful to see that he’s alright and in one piece as well as totally ignorant to how Blitzø’s shock gives way to uncharacteristic seriousness as he tries to get Reader out of there.

Reader also didn’t see Stolas staring at the two of them with shrunken pupils and an unidentifiable expression on his face. The owl stops Reader and Blitzø in their tracks and introduces himself, although it’s tepid and capped off with some kind of comment about Reader’s ability to be where they’re not wanted.

Reader ends up getting kicked out of the palace. Literally. And then shoved out the rest of the way by hellhound guards. They go back to I.M.P. more subdued and inform everyone that Blitzø is ok and promises to be back soon, but Reader remains somber and bothered.

Things escalate even when Blitzø returns, as Stolas starts calling to ask for Reader at random times. The prince is so good at making it seem like he just wants to talk, but clearly there’s some kind of vendetta here. Reader endures thinly-veiled threats to their well-being and little quips about their intelligence, appearance, importance in Blitzø’s life.

It’s truly disheartening, but not as disheartening as it is to see Blitzø fall into pattern of abuse to appease Stolas. Reader realizes that it’s true what Stolas has snidely called them out on — Reader is in love with Blitzø — but the realization comes with Blitzø being put deeper and deeper under Stolas’s spell.

Horror bedevils you as Blitzø begins to destruct, living for the owl prince and believing himself in love but never good enough to deserve Stolas. You feel like you’re losing your mind as everyone else says nothing and your boss, your friend, the one you love most slips further away from you and into the arms of a monster.

[cecilyv]

wip wednesday

I'm making @liminalmemories21 write sports ball. Well, let's be fair -- I'm writing sports ball references and she's writing all the "wtf the are you talking about, none of this makes any sense," parts.

Buck/Tommy, 9-1-1

++

“So you found the picture.”

“When I was looking for the manual,” Buck agrees, “I didn’t know you played baseball. I played football-- “ 

Tommy snorts, “Of course you did.” 

And hey, “Hey!” 

Tommy squeezes his shoulders and steps back. “You kind of have a thing for running headlong into danger, Evan, I’m not sure if you noticed.” 

The end of his thought is muffled, like he’s talking with his shirt over his head, and Buck twists in his seat to watch as Tommy drops his shirt at his feet and starts popping the buttons on his pants, and “Oh, hey, no distracting me, you played baseball--” 

“I was drafted out of high school,” Tommy says, as he kicks off his pants and reaches for Buck’s hand, tugging him up, kissing him softly. “Enlisted in the army instead.” He shrugs and looks down the hallway, “Can I distract you now?” 

Turns out, the answer is definitely, yes. 

------

and:

Now that it’s all out there, Tommy really opens up about things Buck never heard him talk about before -- which mostly, it seems, is how much Tommy hates the Dodgers. But he puts his hatred aside for the good of the group -- he’s got a friend who made it to the show but is now on the training staff, one of the guys from his old Little League days. He sets Tommy up with a suite at Dodger stadium.

"Who," Eddie hisses as they bypass all the lines at the park heading for one of the boxes, "exactly does Tommy know?  Is he secretly a mob boss who moonlights at the LAFD?"

Buck does actually know the answer to this, and not because he'd wondered that once or twice too.  But letting Eddie dangle is more fun, so he just raises his eyebrows and shrugs.  "He knows a guy,” and Eddie sighs, and Buck tries to distract him, “Did you know Chavez Ravine used to be a neighborhood?” 

Ravi and Tommy bond about the unfairness of the Dodgers getting Shohei Ohtani for steal (like, a literal steal, Tommy spends 20 minutes trying to explain it to Buck, who just nods and backs away slowly) and decide that they’re going to the Angels game next time (heartbreak and bad seats be damned). None of them are actually Dodger fans, except Hen, who’s fully decked out in her blue and white and they try not to hold that against her. 

They all cheer when Station 118 is welcomed on the big scoreboard in the outfield. 

During the game, while everyone else mills around, grabbing food, gabbing, and halfheartedly cheering, Tommy sits with a clipboard, pencil and complicated sheet of paper that he dutifully fills out after every pitch. Buck sits down next to him, watches for a while and then Tommy quietly starts explaining the scorecard and all its abbreviations and rules. 

It does make the time go faster.

[bigtreefest]

Ugh, mini rant about work so it’s going below the cut

You ever feel like coworkers put you down because idk, maybe they’re jealous? Intimidated? I just feel like at work, no one really knows me. And it’s fine, because tbh, I don’t want them to. But like, everyone around here is so odd.

My bosses think I can take on a thousand things at once, but also think I’m never doing anything.

My coworkers think they’re the only ones with crazy schedules.

And people who have more education than me (aka pharmacist coworker) think that I’m spacey?

Like, sorry my concentration was in inorganic chemistry, not radioactivity. You’ve literally been in this field for half my life!! How dare you think I’m not smart because this is all new to me and I’m learning.

And then I essentially get accused of not learning because I don’t pay attention by another coworker. She’s asking me to take over a responsibility she’s shown me twice in the multiple months I’ve been here. And it’s everyone in the lab’s responsibility, so why isn’t she asking anyone else in the lab to help!?!?

This all really just made me peeved yesterday to the point I cried the more I thought about it. Like, I know a lot, but this is literally so far off what I’ve learned. Haven’t I proven my wide breadth of knowledge from cooking to entertainment, to general trivia!? Well, no, I guess, because no one bothers to ask me or talk to me. No one knows about my life, the things I did growing up. It just sucks sometimes.

Ps. I was there for ELEVEN HOURS yesterday. No one really knows. No one really cares or sees what I do. Like, I’m not asking for overwhelming praise, just some sort of acknowledgment that I’m having to make something when it wasn’t all handed to me like some other coworkers. I really wish I had friends around here. Truly in Misery.

[mediumtires]

I'm still not over this. How in the world Christian is sharing this and expect us to be okay ? HOW??

I'm also living for Fed to be there as their chaperon 😂 he cannot let these menaces free or chaos will prevail.

It got me thinking now, is Fred going to tease the hell out of Toto at each TP meetings now?

i would like to formally apologise i don’t understand how no one else is losing their mind about this? i am so about to lose my mind?

you’re telling me christian horner and toto wolff shared a flight to melbourne (loooooong flight from the uk) and christian just causally drops that bomb on us like it’s something they do all the time?

i swear the most compelling thing about them is that THEY LIKE EACH OTHER. all the yelling and the one upping and the creating fake scenarios for netflix, the comments, the quotes they feed the press, the mind games, "i don't have to kiss his arse" etc etc etc but at the end of the day they’ve been around the paddock together for over a decade. in 2014/15/16/17/18 they hung around each other ALL THE TIME.

and then 2021 happened and gLoVeS wErE oFf but even after that— may i remind everyone of preseason testing 2022?

this was literally only A FEW WEEKS after that commission meeting where masi got fired relocated. weeks after toto wore a black turtleneck like he’d just buried the w12. and they were acting like giggling schoolgirls twirling their hair and having a laff? are you joking? are you telling me these two whiny conceited big headed team bosses can just forgive and forget?

YES AND ITS BECAUSE THEY LIKE EACH OTHER. toto probably acknowledged what happened in ad wasn’t christian’s fault and christian’s crush on toto is big enough that he could move past merc protesting max's win and getting his bestie michael fired relocated.

and now you’re telling me they’re sharing flights. sure sure. probably because they’re really environmentally conscious. maybe even an accidental booking on a commercial flight. two personal assistants going “whoopsie didn’t check the passenger list sorry”. three if you count in fred but he and toto probably booked that flight together. surely they weren’t plane pooling a private chartered flight. cough cough surely not. these three old rich men (billionaire toto wolff) would totally sit first class on a commercial flight, 17 hours among commoners, before one of the hardest races of the season, one of them with a broken back, one of them blind, and one of them with a tummy ache. these three very rich men would totally suck it up and bite the bullet to make sure their carbon footprints stay as low as possible.

HELL no i don’t believe it for a second. they plane pooled. BECAUSE THEYRE FRIENDS.

christian is the longest serving tp along with franz tost but toto has been around since 2011ish when he first started at williams. they've known each other for A LONG TIME. no other team principals have been around as consistently and continuously as these two. sure some of the current tps have been around the paddock in other roles. and yet with the exception of toto and fred, none of them are "friends".

i am convinced they started hanging out. they must have because they were the two youngest tps around and everyone else was boring (except for maurizio my beloved). they build a rapport. some kind of undefinable bond, not friends, not colleagues, rivals maybe, but there's respect. even if christian won't ever admit to it ever. maybe they don't go to dinner together but I'm convinced they text occasionally, anything between "happy birthday" and "fuck you for buying out my engineer i actually needed that one". also. christian is ceo of a top level performing technology business (lmao) and if there's one thing toto knows it's management and finance. like I cannot imagine they have never had conversations about that. they're both passionate about racing. sure they probably have like hugeeee differences in opinions about certain things but it's because they're both willing to do whatever it takes for their team to win. they must respect that in the other. (their opinions are probably not even that different if we think about it. probably scarily similar actually. this is the problem, they are very much two sides of the same coin. they want their team to win and they’re willing to do pretty much anything to get there. they look at each other and don’t like what they see because they’re literally mirror images.) (THEYRE TOO SIMILAR)

IN CONCLUSION. they like each other. they may not be friends by common definition but THEY ARE SOMETHING. they share flights I rest my case.

(also yes obviously fred makes fun of them all the time it’s how he’s coded)

[mister-e-muss]

Time for the first backlog report of the new year! I didn’t actually finish as many games this month as I thought I would. I was intending to put Octopath Travler 1, The Lost Child, and Pokémon Black on this list, but such has eluded me.

Bravely Default II:

I gotta be honest. This game isn’t on here because I completed it. It’s on here because after several years of playing on and off, after having been stuck on optional bosses one too many times, after reviewing the fact that it is number five on my longest played Switch games (sandwiched between Dragon Quest XI and Trails of Cold Steel 3 if you’re curious), I still find myself not liking this game. I played for more than ninety hours, but only rarely in that time did it ever feel like I was having fun. I have many, many issues with this game, which probably deserves its own post.

What I’ve learned from this game is this. 1.) If you don’t like the demo of a game, don’t purchase the full game in the hopes that it will get good. It won’t. 2.) You can disagree with literally everyone else without being a contrarian if you have actual beef. 3.) Sunk cost fallacy is a bitch. If it sucks, hit da bricks!

Ghost Trick: Phantom Detective:

Now for a game that is perfect in every way! :D

The music, the rube-Goldberg puzzles, the story, they’re all great! Every single character has unique motion to them, from Inspector Cabanella’s style to Bailey’s Panic Dance, to *Spoilers* unnerving self-manipulation. The amount of character packed into this game is untouchable. It stole my heart so completely that it’s become one of the few games I’ve ever 100%’ed.

Now go play it for yourself! It only took me like two or three days!

Shantae, Half-Genie Hero:

This game has been sitting in my Switch Library for quite a while. I’ve enjoyed the Shantae series since Risky’s Revenge, on the DSi.

Wayforward seems to have put significant effort into the presentation. The 3D modeled environments actually help the platforming in a way, making it easier to distinguish background from interactive elements. The music is nothing short of great.

I do find the plot to be a bit thin however. I hopping across levels to fulfill Mimic’s grocery list isn’t exactly high-stakes adventure. They try to tie this all up with a supposed threat to the realm of magic, but it only comes up at the beginning and end, making the individual ‘episodes’ feel disconnected. I also find it odd that they try to put in a ‘You can rely on your friends’ Aesop when in this game they debatably do the least, outside of Sky and Wrench being your taxi.

On that note the whole ‘Shantae is fired’ bit would have hd more weight to it if we visited more than one town.

Regardless, I do think it’s a fine game, and one worth the time spent on it.

Bayonetta 2:

As long as there’s music, she’ll keep on dancing! And there is music and dance aplenty in this game!

The combat is just as smooth, with the introduction of the Umbrian Climax only adding to the experience. The music and visuals are both crisp and clean, though I have to say that I prefer the first game’s soundtrack overall.

The plot is good, with plenty of twists, but I find that they should perhaps have split the ‘Jeanne must be rescued from hell’ and ‘amnesiac kid gets involved in supernatural family drama’ should have perhaps been saved for different games. I like Loki, (breakdancer who fights with a tarot deck is such a fun character idea)but we came for the girlfriends. I also wish they leaned in more with being able to fight demons. Having a separate enemy category for them is a nice step, but less so when there’s only like, ten or twelve of them.

[mass-convergence]

On Criminal Minds and Stuff

Okay this started out as a thing about what I thought about how the more recent seasons (post Mr. Scratch but pre-Evolution) handled JJ and Emily’s friendship/dynamic … and then it spiraled out of control into a whole analysis on the most recent seasons in general. So excuse the disorganized thoughts here - coming off of a night shift and also I’m typing this on my phone. It is what it is.

I would like to see more of the dynamic between JJ and Emily as close friends, I feel like that’s been somewhat lacking in the most recent seasons pre-Evolution. JJ freaking got shot (and died for a second … honestly surprised she wasn’t laid up for longer but that’s TV for you) and given how close those two were in previous seasons - you would think there would be more screen time to Emily’s reaction to JJ getting shot. JJ helped arrange Emily’s fake death and Emily literally flew her ass back to Quantico from London when JJ got kidnapped. I know Emily is the queen of compartmentalization but … idk … I feel like we should have gotten something other than a brief scene where Emily shows up at the hospital to ask JJ if she could confirm if Grace was the one who shot her. Doesn’t even show the interaction either - Emily just shows up and says she’s going to talk to JJ and that’s it. I remember when Garcia got shot and everyone on the team was in that waiting room even though her shooter was on the loose. (Guess thats what fanfic’s for 🤷🏻)

Also on the vein of JJ getting shot - and this is me being somewhat nitpicky about how this was written but:

How the fuck did no one notice JJ was missing … or not hear the gun going off in that parking garage? I feel like that was written solely so Reid could notice and go find her and I found that entire progression of events very clunky. How JJ got shot was a little dumb too. JJ is a veteran FBI agent at this point; she probably wouldn’t have bent over to pick up the gun, which necessitated her taking her attention away from the two unsecured suspects who already proved themselves to be pretty dangerous. I feel like she’d have called for someone and kept her gun trained on the two. It wasn’t like she was in the middle of nowhere. It was just … kind of stupidly written? I read that she got shot in this episode before I watched it - and I had envisioned some kind of active shoot out situation where a bunch more people were involved and JJ got hit by a lucky (or I suppose unlucky) shot. Not JJ standing alone in a parking garage with zero backup and making the dumbest choice imaginable that just doesn’t seem to fit with her character at all. She’s a trained FBI agent - that’s not a mistake she would have made. Like what the fuck that was kind of stupid I’m sorry.

Also - I’m not saying that the show should write JJ and Emily getting together. As much as I do ship them romantically and love reading fic about them together … I also do like the concept of those two just having a strong platonic bond because as an ace person: I need more representations of that shit in media okay? Not everyone needs to be jumping each other’s bones.

Tbh the lack of intrateam romances was what drew me to this show in the first place. This team’s seen the worst that humanity has to offer and they have each other’s backs like a family and I love that. I love those small moments where they’re just hanging out as a team at the bar or watching their boss run in a race (while a bunch of them are hungover from Girl’s Night). It’s not an MCU Avengers situation where they feel like they’re all coworkers who vaguely hate each other. The BAU team’s a tight knit group and they love and support each other (which is what bothered me with how JJ getting shot was written - we had an entire episode dedicated to Garcia getting shot and the team’s response to that. You’re telling me Reid was the only guy who was in that waiting room - I get the Chameleon was at large and stuff but seriously no one else on the BAU team other than Reid was in that waiting room at least for a little bit).

I just feel like some of that team as a family dynamic has been pushed to the side in favor of writing about vaguely omnipotent serial killer #47282727 who has developed some kind of obsession or grudge with the BAU. Yes the multi episode super smart and competent serial killers were great to see but I don’t need that rehashed every season. Sometimes a terrifying dude whose case takes up back to back episodes before he (or she) is caught in the season opener would be fine. And that unsub’s only issue with the BAU is that they’re trying to stop him. At a certain point it’s like Marvel movies trying to treat a world ending threat like a serious thing when that’s been the plot of the past ten movies. Not everything needs to be a grand plotline. Sometimes the stakes can be small but feel just as important as a world ending threat.

Like Cyrus? Terrifying cult leader. Great. We didn’t need to have his cult re-emerge again (and somehow escape detection for all these years).

… I also have my thoughts on how Emily as Unit Chief has been written in the episodes I’ve seen (again haven’t watched Evolution yet but I’m very much looking forward to the episode where she gets high). I think that’s why I liked “Saturday” because we kind of got that glimpse of her personality that I loved in the earlier seasons. Maybe because she was out of her role as unit chief so she didn’t have to have that somewhat aloof air of professionalism and ultra-competency. She could just be Emily and eat eight (sorry, seven) donuts and drink wine … and also get sued by her former neighbor and not make the greatest decision in how to handle it.

I love this show, it got me through high school and it was one of the driving factors to me getting a job with the federal government as a civil servant who’s job is to protect the public. Not that I do anything as badass as the BAU, I sit at a desk and according to some people: I get paid to be wrong all the time. Like my current career path isn’t 100% because of Criminal Minds but I can’t deny that the whole concept of being part of a group that helps protect people didn’t nudge me in that direction. Basically - this show meant a lot and still means a lot to me even if I lost touch with it for a few years. I never get tired of going back to the old seasons and rewatching my favorite episodes.

This show just clicked for me. I always aspired to be like Emily, mainly for a stupid “we shared the same first name at some point before I realized some stuff about my gender identity” reason but she also resonated with me as someone who felt like she didn’t quite belong when she first joined the BAU and tried super hard to prove herself. Like that describes my entire state of being from elementary school until now (I’ve only just started really believing my coworkers when they tell me I’m doing a good job and I’m a valuable asset to the office). I looked up to her and I still do.

I wish I had a friend like JJ. Probably wouldn’t need her assistance in faking my own death unless something goes truly off the rails in my life. But I dunno, she just so kind and warm and caring and also a total badass (though, again - I don’t know if I’ve seen too much of that side of her in the more recent seasons and it’s kind of sad). I’m not saying I don’t have friends irl like that but idk, I just wish I had a friend like her.

I looked up to Reid as someone who’s had many of his socially awkward tendencies, but he was always not afraid to be himself and I found that amazing. As someone who’s felt like they’ve had to mask their neurodivergence - sometimes I’m like “but I could be like Reid and just … be myself”.

I could go on about Hotch, Rossi, Garcia, and Morgan - even Alex Blake who I feel like people didn’t really like at first (not sure about her current standing in the fandom … I think people have warmed to her - I just happened to be in that era where god forbid a woman show up and “replace” the fandom favorite or get in the way of a ship that was never going to canonically sail).

This post/essay/ramble has gone on for long enough though … even though I have plenty more thoughts. I like how this show actually pulled me out of this weird depressive funk I’ve been in for the past half year and I actually care about things again. I’m sure there were other factors involved with that but watching a childhood favorite was certainly a contributing factor. I’m going to go do some Christmas-y shit that involves stuffing my face with whatever’s in my fridge and pass out now.

[yuttikkele]

do you guys think the omegaverse exists for werebeasts in the monster high universe?

yes that’s a really funny statement, but I’m taking it seriously in this post, so BEFORE we go any further: STOP thinking about omegaverse as a fetish. STOP thinking about it as a sexual thing. ABO has such interesting potential, so before I say anything else, I need everyone to be on the same page that it does NOT always involve sex. This post is NSFW FREE!! YOU HEAR ME!!! Especially since they’re CHILDREN!!!!

ahem. Anyways

It makes sense. It would be an interesting concept and sort of an add-on to separate werecreatures from other animal-inspired monsters.

anyways I have a bunch of headcanons about it under the cut. these are specifically for G3, but take them however you like! also, there’s a huge text wall under the cut, just so you know.

Clawdeen is an alpha. In every universe. She’s specifically the born leader alpha. She’s humble and is all “no, no, I can’t lead it’s not my thing,” but she seriously fits the role of leader like a glove. She’s also subconsciously wants to have control over every little thing, but she consciously knows that’s not how things work. She’s one of the more aggressive alphas, though she doesn’t notice and won’t admit it to herself.

Clawd is a beta. He’s. Just a dude. And he’s quite good at it. He’s very good at calming people (namely Clawdeen), and generally very mellow. He’s protective of his sister, obvi. That’s like a mix of older brother syndrome and beta-will-watch-over-the-pack-itis.

Howleen is also a beta. Howleen is one of the more aggressive betas. She knows her time is coming when Grandpa Romulus will get too old, and she’ll be leader of the pack. She likes to fight for the formality of the title, but she actually doesn’t mind Romulus being the leader. She’s very comfortable with it!

Romulus is an omega. Yes, he’s an omega, and everyone (at least all the werebeasts) knows it. He’s the leader of the pack, and he takes pride in that title. He’s very insecure about being an omega, so that’s why he fights for any ounce of dominance he can get. This does cause him to be a nuisance, though. It’s not that he minds being an omega; he just doesn’t want others to treat him differently, which is fair. The tough show is just so people don’t automatically think he’s weak. He does need to realize that all of his friends believe him, though, so he can stop being such a self-protecting bonehead now.

Barkimedes is an alpha. Some people find it odd that the werewolf pack has its omega as the first in command, beta as the second in command, and its alpha last as third in command, but Barkimedes likes it this way! He’s never really been one to tell others what to do. Lots of people are surprised that he’s even an alpha because of how much he’s bossed around. Well, those people are wrong because Barkimedes is the alpha that ever alpha’d (whatever that means…)! Barkimedes is more of the protective type. If he senses his friends are in danger, he would do literally anything. He is REALLY overprotective of the pack, and they probably never notice it (Example: You just barely insulted Romulus and Howleen. They’re telling you off while Barkimedes stands behind them with the most menacing look on his face. Romulus and Howleen look back at Barkimedes, and suddenly his face is as sweet as an angel. They turn back to you, and he is growling at you again). If he sees you messing with something his hindmind considers “his” (like his friends, or maybe his slice of pizza), he’ll go feral on you. However, he’ll never use his alpha “powers” (such as his alpha voice) unless it’s an emergency. He’s just chill like that.

Toralei is a beta. I was debating saying she’s an omega, but beta just makes more sense in my mind. No one knows she’s a beta. Everyone thinks she’s an alpha. She acts and tries VERY hard to present as an alpha for the validation. Her mom, Catarina, is an alpha. As she is a terrible mother, Catarina is an elitist and also a sexist. Catarina thinks that betas are no better than “useless” omegas. Possibly even more useless than omegas since they don’t do “anything special.” She was very disappointed when she found out that Toralei was a beta, despite that not being something Toralei can control. Toralei will sometimes make fun of Romulus being an omega, and she will always feel bad immediately after. She does take medicine that she really shouldn’t take so that she can mask and smell like an alpha. Whenever the topic of second sex comes up, Toralei tries to back out of the conversation as soon as possible. She really needs to be comfortable in her own body and stop caring what her mom thinks.

Purrsephone and Meowlody are either betas or omegas. I don’t know which one they’d be, but they’re definitely not alphas.

Mouscedes is an omega. I don’t know much about mousedes, but from what I can tell, she’s pretty dependent on others. She’s not ashamed of it either. Whatever works, queen!

Teez I have no clue. We really don’t know much about him yet. I have no idea what he could be.

Frankie conveniently has a werecreature hindmind researcher brainbit, so they spout random facts sometimes and occasionally can help out (depending on what they can conveniently recall)!

A lot of the other monsters don’t actually realize that werebeasts have a second gender. Clawdeen didn’t know at all until the pack told her, and it explained a lot about her sudden aggressiveness.

The second gender is also a second sex. It’s basically just like us separating gender and sex. The werebeasts just have another pair!

Werebeasts can find out what their “assigned second gender” is at birth, but a lot of parents decide not to worry about it. 1. It’s way simpler to use one’s first set of gender/sex. 2. The rest of the monster world isn’t even gonna care about your second set.

The second gender reveals itself on its own right when puberty starts. It’s usually the first sign of puberty in werebeasts.